Rancid vibes from Terrific Al 😔
sword handshake because I think that would be the funniest way to accidentally kill someone. Or PRETEND it was an accident >;))
(Not pictured; Baby Tooth squatting in Alvin's helmet not three feet away)
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The thing about the final lore tab is that, besides the fact that I'm devastated in ways I can't put into words, the way Saint was affected by this whole thing is unique.
This is obviously primarily Osiris' trauma that we can't really properly comprehend, but Osiris wasn't fully conscious for most of it. It fell to Saint to wait, and hope, that Osiris would be brought back and that he would wake up. There was no certainty for him there. And even before that, he watched "Osiris" being strange and distant and acting weird but obviously nobody could even begin to speculate that the person he interacted with wasn't Osiris at all, so the trauma went from there, from learning that he lost Sagira, then to the shock of Osiris being kidnapped and then the quest to bring him back and then him being brought back in a coma and then the 9 long months of waiting until he woke up.
The state of constant anxiety he experienced for almost 2 years total is nervewracking and gutwrenching. I don't think we can fully understand the impact of that on someone. And the best, or worst, thing is that Saint is infinitely patient. He is infinitely emotional and merciful and opts to be the better person and to wait and wait and wait. And hope that it can be fixed.
Except it can't. It can't be fixed. And not only can it not be fixed, but there will never be justice for it. It's impossible. There isn't a way to truly punish Savathun for what she's done. There is no relief or catharsis for Saint. While Osiris can mostly move on, Osiris did not really have to go through what Saint had to go through. Their traumas are different and Saint's is the type that no one can really understand and there is nothing he can do about it.
A younger Saint would've killed Immaru and then Savathun, 100%. But now he can't, because he isn't that person anymore. And yet, the grief and trauma remain and he has no outlet for them and nothing that can be done to enact any sort of justice. So he settles for pure rage, letting himself essentially vent that anger out, but still leave everyone alive. And there's really no true release here. He got a brief satisfaction of killing Savathun over and over, but at the end of the day, she will walk away and nothing will change and there will be no fix.
Which is why he comes back and just cries. As he said, this wasn't for Osiris, it was for him. It was his outlet for anger and nothing else. After that, there's nothing else left to do but cry. No one can really help him carry the burden of what he's gone through and besides: he's a Titan. He's the one carrying other people's burdens. Which just added to the trauma because for so long he's only cared for others, mostly for Osiris, and never really let himself fully grieve or talk about it. Saint never really processed the horrifying ordeal of constant concern for his loved one, then the realisation that his loved one isn't even with him, then the desperate search and then waiting for months and months for the hope that his loved one might wake up. Then Osiris is awake and we're forced to play allies with the person who traumatised both of them in an incomprehensibly terrifying way. Saint had no other way of attempting to make his peace with the situation.
Year of processing grief. I'm in shambles.
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step-brother riddle with a camgirl step-sister……. (and also the two of you hate each other! :) this is a crucial detail.)
you often stream when your parents and riddle are out of the house. sometimes riddle’s gone off to the library to study or he’s meeting up with trey and che’nya while your parents go out to a social gathering. the times in which you have the house to yourself are few and far between, as mama rosehearts hardly lets you do anything unless you give her specific details of where you intend to go and how long you’ll be there and what you’ll be doing. so when you are afforded alone time, you dedicate it to hours-long streams.
for the time being, you’ve made a decent amount of money posting lewd photos to your account, but it’s the streams that bring in the most money. your viewers are from all over. from the guy (floyd) who pays absurd amounts of donations and says the most vulgar things in your chat, starting fights when anyone says something he disagrees with, to the guy who types in all lowercase and gamer lingo (idia), you have your fair share of regulars, all of whom tune in for your rare streams.
no one’s found out about your secret side hobby yet. no one…except riddle. he comes home early from his outing with trey and che’nya, always determined to be back before his mother returns home so that it can appear as if he merely went to the library, studied, and returned home in time for dinner. and normally you’re able to plan around riddle’s annoyingly perfect schedules. this time, however, you fail to remember he mentioned he’d be going out with friends rather than studying; and somehow you fail to hear the door opening and closing downstairs while you’re up in your room, riding a monster dildo (a gift from a very generous viewer) in front of your webcam.
you and riddle have never gotten along. even when your parents married, the two of you tried (and failed) to tolerate one another and it didn’t work. so now you avoid each other when you can, opting to be cordial for courtesy’s sake if you happen to cross paths at home. so when riddle goes up to your room to deliver some macarons trey insisted he take home for you (trey’s too nice, riddle thinks; if it were up to him you wouldn’t get any sweets. >:p), he expects you to be reading a magazine or painting your nails or talking on the phone…whatever girls like you do, he doesn’t know! what he doesn’t expect is to walk in on you cumming around a big, thick dildo while you’re dressed in such inappropriate attire!! and what’s worse is that you’re broadcasting it to strangers online! have you no shame?!
that day riddle learns his step-sister has a very…unique hobby. it’s also the day he starts looking at you from a new angle. :) and it’s also the day his nrc peers who watch you learn riddle has a cute step-sister. >:)
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The Abduction of the Starchild
[id: Digital sketch of Roxie, Rose and the Starchild from Ghost Quartet. Roxie has fallen asleep in her armchair, holding her baby, also asleep. Rose stands above her, hand gently on Roxie's temple. /end id]
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straight up not respecting some of the alleged p2 characters' ages as they were given on the VA's papers bc you're telling me this is a 27yo man on the left & a 35(!)yo woman on the right? you jest. this woman is in her 20s at most. she doesn't have a wrinkle of age on her face. just worry. i know men age like milk this is taking the piss. i know patho 2 is the "hot blemishless 20something white(-passing) women" game but at this point own it. don't try lying to me. she doesn't look a day past 29. got friends below 25 with more winkles. in the first half of the 20th century too. where would she be getting her anti-aging serums.
you're telling me this woman who's a chronic worrier, dealing with chronic pain, who smokes like a locomotive to cope is allegedly 5 years Older than this guy who's been drinking himself to sleep for like 5 years.
(mike's mic voice) don't piss me off
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