thecastorsystem

[thecastorsystem]

We kind of spilled our guts to a girl we know from church about system stuff (didn't go into too much detail but still) and she was actually really nice about it however I think she thought we needed to like try to force ourselves to be one person and like. I know she was tryna help but girllll we're telling you we're fine lmao???

[thecastorsystem]

me when i have no reaction in response to seeing images of my traumatic experiences and the guy that lowkey abused me as a kid but i get an immediate and visceral reaction when i see fanart of source me shipped with jade

nothing against her but i would *not* date her in any situation ever

[thecastorsystem]

Should we make sideblogs for ourselves? We have one for Terrence already but that's more of a vent blog. All our other blogs are shared and I think it would be fun to have our own but that would be like seven more blogs and we already have a bunch lmao

[thecastorsystem]

Me when I thought I had finally solved all my mental health issues and figured out exactly what was wrong with me when I tried to silence what I THOUGHT were just my normal intrusive thoughts and they started talking back to me with different speech patterns and having their own opinions

[thecastorsystem]

a system can be “multiple people in one body” if a system feels that describes them best. anti endos need to stop dictating how other people view their system, regardless of origin, they can't tell people how to see their own plurality, each system can describe themselves differently, and we believe we are more than one in a body because there is no "central identity" "one person we are part of" that one person literally does not exist for us, force that nudge toward fusion somewhere else, not here.

[thecastorsystem]

SINCE IT'S PRIDE MONTH

we're sharing our identities (sexuality at least because gender is hard)

D.A. : Aegosexual, Aro-spec

Adam: Vincian/Gay

Dave: Bisexual

Sollux: Aspec, Panromantic

Scout: Bisexual

(Terrence is cishet but he's an ally)

All of us (- Terrence) are transmasc but we're still figuring out exact labels

[thecastorsystem]

I feel so weird calling myself we even though it's accurate because like... idk I am six guys but also it's not really ever just one guy fronting alone. So my whole life I've been six guys trying to be one person and I guess I still don't feel comfortable acknowledging that that isn't what I am

On the bright side though, we all get along pretty well and have similar interests due to being co-con for most of our life

[thecastorsystem]

Now that I know I'm a system I can look back and see just how obvious it should've been lol

Like I was always talking to myself, sometimes even out loud. I would sometimes find myself saying "we" instead of "I" out of nowhere. My mood changed a lot and I always felt that my personality was a bit unpredictable to the point where even I was a little scared of myself. I felt like some of my thoughts and actions weren't mine.

And now obviously I know this was a plurality thing. But back then it was just normal :D

[thecastorsystem]

How am I supposed to explain that I'm okay with the majority of Homestuck ships but I can't ship Dave with anyone but Karkat... Like I know it's super hypocritical of me to be (mostly) a multishipper but then not really accept any other pairing with those two characters but man! Idk! The Dave Strider in my head said he liked Karkat Vantas and ONLY Karkat Vantas sorry