404daydreams

[404daydreams]

"After living a colorful life both on the edge and normally; brain of a prodigy, a few successful ventures, a few legal battles, a few fights where things went awefully wrong, from befriending dreaded gangsters to being invited at TEDx as an audience at the age of 15, having numerous failed romances, the last one too bitter of a truth where I was unaware of the person's true intentions, I kinda still feel empty. I have a job I love working in, I am excelling there, but none of the boss's praises or any piece of code makes me happy. Music, well that does but certain days I don't compose anything I just blankly stare at the DAW, try, fail and close the application. I don't know why, for a moment last year I was good, but how did I even forget that maybe the almighty always loves to snatch every thing or person I have loved away from me. Few days I am just dragging myself into doing everything, a few days I ignore the void within me."

-Me

[404daydreams]

"Bored out of work tonight. Checking out some cool guns and reading a new psychology journal on personality disorders."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"When you don't entertain bullshit anymore, life straightens out. Liars, pretentious, deceiving people can't be honest. They never were, they never will. Kick em out when you sensed that yes this person is bullshitting you. Don't give chances, go for your own peace of mind."

-Me

[404daydreams]

"When Monday doesn't feels like Monday anymore, know you're on the right track."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"Life as a reformed gang member or a gang connected guy be like: "I will smash your head with a iron base-ball bat but no I have changed, my priorities are different and I no more resonate with that version, but still I want to smash your head and going back to normal activities. But again I want you to be hospitalized because of me. 😂😂"

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"Life's been great lately. No complaints only gratitude. I've everything and more one craves for. I no more reminisce on things, places or people that never matched my standards."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"I feel peace, finally. Not in an absolute way, but it's a better place to be than where I was a few months back, regardless of my fan following and their jobs as unknown paps."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"This year has humbled me down for sure. Many things have changed and once in a while, maybe like in every 5-6 years there should be a refresh/reset year just to keep one grounded."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"You don't heal from certain things that were done to you. The one who did it would easily say something like: "Let it heal you" etc. Because if they had an idea what they're doing to you, they would have an idea. It's easy for psychopaths to creare wreckage and then also expect absolute healing from the things "they did" and never even "took responsibility" for any of the things they did."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"You can move on from a relationship and still love the person. It's called coming to terms with the reality and getting over the hate of what and why that has happened. Especially when you didn't even play the major role in the relationship failing."

-Me.

[404daydreams]

"Everyone wants this million dollar answer from me. I won't go into the details but sex workers are human too, and I don't mind marrying someone who has it in them to leave that world and start afresh. It's not about me at all. That's all I have to answer to that question."

[404daydreams]

"I observed a couple of clowns whose full time job is to look for my location, from point A to point B and pass by me. I mean, what the fuck? This is so hilarious. One life, and this is how these people are spending it, while hiding their face all the time because they themselves cringe. Like seriously? Never felt laughing at yourselves? 😆 You really think I give a fuck? Still delusional and imaginary landscapes because reality hurts, no? 😆😆 It's seriously hilarious."

[404daydreams]

"I no more take toxic patterns of narcissistic people. If you feel you can never be wrong and you got this huge but so fragile of an ego, there's the door. Help yourself. The pleasure's all mine. I no more give endless chances. You repeat the same manipulative and gaslit shit twice, then I'll step back, peacefully. You tried getting me into office politics, you tried to gather bits and pieces of conversations without any context. Maybe you can fool everyone around you, I can't be and you sensed that pretty well, and distanced yourself for the good."

[404daydreams]

"The depth of my soul is not the problem. The illiteracy of your. shallowness's is."

-Me

[404daydreams]

"Well the weekend is here. Two days off from work which means, listening to a lot of electronic music, producing some, reading, learning and relaxing, ofcourse; sleeping after being awake for 5 days during the night because of work itself - night shifts. Body has to recover too."

-Me and my muse//From my journal.

[404daydreams]

Late night thoughts.

Another one: People keep asking me, what did I look for in them? Why did I make such a religious blunder, how I can be so careless being so intelligent. All I have to say is: If given the chance, If again I meet that person I would repeat everything, except the mistakes I made. I cannot guarantee the other person's actions, but if its about me, I'll repeat it all and maybe, just maybe this time - I'll drive it to forever, for eternity, till death do us apart.

[404daydreams]

"When you're healing from a relationship that didn't work out, but the love was really intense its absolutely okay to miss them or that bond - that's being human. And meanwhile if you're seeing someone and they make an issue about it and break things off with you, not giving you your space to heal while claiming to love you - is nothing but another bogus rollercoaster journey. Save the time and energy, let them go. Maybe this is the chance they were looking for anyways. Don't beg. Don't howl. Just let them go. Relationships are for mature people, not for kids in a matured physic. Healing should be peaceful and you are supposed to be understood."

-Me.