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It’s in his eyes

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sirius finally feeling comfortable enough to alter his physical appearance with the potters' and literal saint euphemia potter having to support him through way too much eyeliner, absolutely shredded jeans, and horrible dye jobs

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listen. i acknowledge and respect the hc that remus and regulus were each other's first kiss. but what we're failing to recognise is that james and sirius were ALSO each other's first kiss

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Happy pride month to our dead gay wizards! 🌈🌙

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”It would be a hundred times easier

If we were young again

But as it is

And it is

We're just two slow dancers, last ones out

We're two slow dancers, last ones out”

This song is so older wolfstar coded, I’m breaking my own heart

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also sirius SHEDS. like he is constantly leaving hair everywhere. on rugs, in beds, stuck to clothes, it's literally on anything he's come into contact with. remus finds it kind of endearing and james thinks it's funny but peter is completely baffled by it. he keeps finding sirius hairs on HIS bed and has on idea how they're getting there. when he goes home for the summer he finds a sirius hair on a jumper he never even took to hogwarts and it nearly drives him insane

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okay but sirius with white and red ink tats

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chapter 6 of dreaming of after is here <3 i really fell off w the excerpts pre-posting the chapter but anyway here's a snippet xoxo

I think we should meet somewhere in public. Sirius felt his stomach drop. Remus didn't want to be alone with him. He didn't trust himself to be alone with Sirius. Sure, he knew fucking Remus was probably a bad idea, both times. In the grand scheme of things, they needed to try and get over one another, and falling into bed together every time they saw each other was not good progress. But the idea of that-- the idea that Remus would one day move on from Sirius, and Sirius from him-- made him want to vomit. Remus was supposed to be his soulmate. They were supposed to grow old together. They were supposed to be buried next to one another. Where had it all gone wrong? Looking back, it felt like Sirius' entire life had slipped through his fingers. A year ago, his life had been perfect. He was raising a beautiful little girl with the love of his life, he lived a short drive from all of his closest friends, and he'd been happy. Really, honestly happy-- the type of happiness that probably irritated everyone around them-- and still stupidly head-over-heels in love. He should've just been content with it, but there was a nagging feeling that something was wrong , and it kept him up at night. He would lay in the middle of the night and watch Remus’ chest rise and fall, trace his gaze along his jaw, just visible in the moonlight. He would count Remus’ freckles and will the feeling to go away; he’d pray that he woke up in the morning and felt completely normal, completely happy, and completely blind to everything wrong in the world. The feeling grew in him. He picked at it like a scab until it was gushing blood, and all of the sudden Sirius couldn’t eat or sleep, and he could hardly stand to look at Remus. The realization hit him violently one rainy afternoon: Remus didn't love him anymore. It wasn't hard to see, once he started looking for it. Remus hardly held his gaze and didn't want to touch him. He started getting angrier and angrier at the smallest things. Even when they were touching, Remus felt a million miles away. Sirius walked around the house on eggshells, trying to make himself small and unnoticeable. That was about when the fighting began in earnest, when things crossed the point of no return. They couldn’t ignore what had broken between them, and it was suddenly laid out across the floor. Sirius clawed desperately through his memory, searching for what he’d done wrong to make Remus not love him anymore, and came up empty each time.  He did something wrong. He was always doing something wrong. He had to have done something wrong. Because the alternative was that Remus had simply fallen out of love, had realized Sirius was too loud, too insecure, too needy to be loved. That couldn't be the answer-- it couldn't.

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sirius won the "most likely to end up in jail" superlative btw

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rip sirius black you would’ve loved making all your friends wish you happy pride month

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rip evan rosier you wouldve loved frank ocean

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sorry but if i was named after a star and then i met a boy who was quite literally ruled by the moon i would also fall in love with him. for the symbolism

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chapter 5 of dreaming of after is out <33 i didn't post a sneak peek this week but here is ur snippet (go read the chap though)

Sirius opened the door, hair unbrushed and still in his pajamas, ready to tell his visitor to fuck right off so he could nap. What he did not expect was his husband to be standing on the other side, looking perfect as ever.

Without thinking, his mouth started moving: "Oh, fuck. " Sirius slapped a hand over his mouth, absolutely mortified at what he’d said. Several long, horrible, awkward moments passed between them, Remus staring blankly with his jaw hanging slightly open. Years ago-- a few months ago, even-- Sirius felt like he could see the love blossoming in Remus' eyes for him. It had been an awkward discovery, at first, realizing that someone was looking at you like you'd hung the moon. The first few times he saw that look, he couldn't help but cower away from it, blushing and hiding his face. Over time, though, he'd come to relish in it. He'd learned to read Remus' mind through his body language: the taut pull of his shoulders when he was stressed, the working of his jaw as he rolled the inside of his lip between his teeth when he thought too hard, the softening of his eyes when he wanted to be done fighting and go back to being in love. Now, though, there was an emotion written across Remus' face that he didn't recognize (or maybe a lack of one, if he thought about it). He had no idea what Remus was feeling, or what he was thinking, and this was a fairly new phenomenon. He spent so long trying to decipher the clues hidden in Remus' features that he hadn't realized he couldn't breathe with his hand over his mouth, index finger pressed under his nostrils. He wrenched his hand away, taking in a desperate breath of air. "I'm so sorry," he said, all in one breath.  Remus shifted awkwardly. "'S'fine. Can I come in?" Two days ago, Sirius would've made some remark about Remus not needing to ask to enter his own house, but he felt protective over it, now. Remus was the one who'd left. He'd sacrificed his claim to this house, had retreated to his mommy and daddy, had refused to come back when begged to. It was Sirius' now, his safe place, his home base in their ongoing battle. So yes, he could ask permission to enter Sirius' house that had Sirius' bedroom and housed Sirius' kid. "Yes," Sirius answered, trying his best to sound diplomatic. He stepped aside and let Remus walk in, then shut the door behind him. Remus moved into the living room, looking about. Right, Sirius thought, he's not here for you, he's here for Cassie. "I didn't know you were coming so early," he explained, "she just went down for her nap, but I'll wake her." "No, no," Remus said quickly. "I, erm, I was... at James and Lily’s. Didn't want to drive all the way back to Mom and Dad's, so..." Sirius briefly felt sympathy for Remus, driving at least an hour each way every time, but he quickly stifled it. There was absolutely no way he would be driving to Hope and Lyall's, both due to the inconvenience and the possibility of coming face-to-face with his soon-to-be-ex-husband's parents. No, Remus could be inconvenienced, and Sirius would not feel guilty for it, because Remus had chosen to leave. "Right. Well, you're welcome to..." Sirius trailed off as Remus turned and looked at him. That look, he knew.

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editing a story about divorce is crazy while processing ur own breakup... like i'm right there with you babe

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i'm always thinking about james seeing the way remus and sirius look at each other and being so happy his two best friends have someone to love them that much

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v1 / v2 / v3

fanart by melemart

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not to change the game here but chapter 3 AND chapter 4 are out !!!

chapter 3 of dreaming of after coming this weekend <3 and here is your weekly snippet:

"Fuck," Remus breathed, blinking back the tears forming in his eyes. Sirius felt himself start to cry, too. "I'm so sorry, Siri." Sirius knew that he was apologizing for more than just taking Cassie. It was for the yelling, the distance, the dismantled mess their relationship had become. Sirius knew Remus was apologizing for that, too, because so was he. He was sorry for that; all the things he’d done that he couldn’t fit into words. "Hey," he said quietly, nudging Remus with his elbow, "look at us. Apologizing like a real married couple." He'd meant it to lighten the mood-- they hadn't properly apologized to one another about anything in weeks, even when it was absolutely warranted-- but something about it seemed to break Remus. His face scrunched up, his jaw quivered, and then he let out a mangled sob. "Oh god," he breathed, collapsing forward so that his head rested in his hands. His shoulders began to shake as he heaved sobs out of his chest. Instinctively, Sirius moved to comfort him. He knelt on the floor, shuffling between Remus' legs, and let the man fall into him. Remus wrapped his arms tightly around Sirius' shoulders, sobbing messily into Sirius' neck. Sirius ran a hand up and down Remus' back, where he'd been scratching just the night before, and pressed a kiss to the side of Remus' head. There was still love. He still loved Remus-- he always would. Remus was his soulmate; he'd made the last fifteen or so years of Sirius' life worth living. He'd been there for Sirius when he was at his absolute lowest with nothing but unending patience. They'd spent nearly ten beautiful years together, six of them married, and three with the most wonderful kid on this planet. But Sirius figured that, sometimes, it was good to quit while you were ahead. He couldn't stand to drag this out any longer, to keep relentlessly fighting, to act like something wasn't broken. He couldn't risk them getting to a place they couldn't come back from. Besides, as much as Sirius loved Remus, Remus didn't love him back anymore. And that was sort of the thing you really needed to make a marriage work.