helluo-librorums - Tumblr blog

[helluo-librorums]

idk why but I forgot that I posted this and it kinda makes me giggle to think about. Mostly because she hates the idea of me having a tumblr and this account is basically a glorified journal. So not only do I have a journal that she will never read, I'm also on an app she despises. The world works in mysterious ways

I will never forget about the time my mom told me that if I kept a diary/journal she would have to read in order to make sure that I wasn't doing anything and lying about it. At the time I actually had a journal and wrote in it very often. After that conversation I stopped writing in it and later threw it out. I don't know if she even knew I had it, but the idea of her looking at it horrified me as a kid. I wasn't even doing anything bad but I wanted to be able to have something that was entirely my own.

[helluo-librorums]

My snapchat memories serve as a constant reminder that life is always changing. I had a memory pop up recently that I couldn't believe was a year ago already. I am currently living the life I was wishing for a year ago. I never thought that day would come, and here I am. It's truly amazing how things change before our very eyes w/o us even noticing.

Don't give up on yourself. One day your life might just surprise you

[helluo-librorums]

There is nothing, and I truly mean nothing, I love more than rewatching/reading Harry Potter. Harry Potter will always bring me a level of joy that I do not get otherwise. And no matter how many times I've seen/read it, there's always something new that I notice. I've seen the movies at least once a year for the past 10ish years. Same thing with the books. They still bring me the same amount of joy as they did the first time.

[helluo-librorums]

fun fact: the nice thing is movie-only, he's unconscious in the books (and acts far worse in general, they cut out a lot of Snape Bullshittery in the ending of PoA)

Book version of this scene is lowkey kinda funny to me because they purposely let him hit his head multiple times too. I just liked that the movies gave at least one redeeming act, since JKR really tried to push the whole "Snape isn't a bad person" thing. He 100% is a bad person and he never should have been considered redeemed in any aspect

[helluo-librorums]

For all of Severus Snape's faults, I love that in the 3rd movie, he is very forcibly trying to protect the trio. Like obvi he was trying to kill Sirius in the shrieking shak, but when Lupin turned, Snape stood in front of them and tried to keep the trio safe

[helluo-librorums]

The other day, I mentioned that I was suicidal but I would never actually commit suicide. One of the guys in my group looked at me and said that just means I'm not suicidal. I don't remember his exact words, but basically, he was saying I was self hurting or something to that effect. Which doesn't make sense because I never said I hurt myself. Just that I have thought and do still think about killing myself, but my will to live is stronger. Also, I refuse to give into the annoying ass voice in my head. And because I know, no matter how much life sucks, I still have people that care about me and would be severely upset if I died

[helluo-librorums]

people always tell me that I look exactly the same as I did in highschool. i'm 21 now and although i've only been out of highschool for 3 years I still think I look different. When I look at pictures from my senior year compared to now I seriously think I look different. it's not a major difference or anything but it is definitely there. idk if its the way I carry myself now or something but i don't look the same anymore

[helluo-librorums]

I'm starting to romanticize my life again. For the past 4ish years, I've really struggled with my mental health and all of its issues. Every so often, I finally break out of it and can be semi-normal, and now is one of those times. Hopefully, it can last longer than the last time, but I never really know.

I'm gonna try and keep this updated, but I have a really bad memory when it comes to stuff like this. I think it is really important that mental health is talked about more, so I'm really going to try.

[helluo-librorums]

I think we should headcanon Percy as having more weird powers based on actual marine life and similar, just for fun. he spits bioluminescence as a defense mechanism. and also is bioluminescent himself sometimes. he can see shrimp colors. he can breathe through his skin. sometimes if he punches things underwater he briefly creates a bubble hotter than the surface of the sun (real thing that mantis shrimp do). he can echolocate. he can regrow his teeth. he can be frozen solid and thaw out and be fine. he can hibernate in mud. he’s poisonous.

[helluo-librorums]

cheeky

[helluo-librorums]

I will never forget about the time my mom told me that if I kept a diary/journal she would have to read in order to make sure that I wasn't doing anything and lying about it. At the time I actually had a journal and wrote in it very often. After that conversation I stopped writing in it and later threw it out. I don't know if she even knew I had it, but the idea of her looking at it horrified me as a kid. I wasn't even doing anything bad but I wanted to be able to have something that was entirely my own.

[helluo-librorums]

I'm slowly healing my inner child one day at a time. I made some college friends outside of my classes. I've started playing minecraft again. I'm starting to focus on things that bring happiness.

But I'm also learning to understand what I've gone through and how I can grow from it. I'm trying to speak kinder to myself. Every day is getting better, and that's all I care about

[helluo-librorums]

I started thinking about getting invisalign a couple of days ago. I'm only saying this because I haven't said a single word aloud about it. But I somehow am getting targeted ads about invisalign all of a sudden.

[helluo-librorums]

Did I take 6 hours to do an assignment? Yes

Did said assignment realistically take me only 30 minutes? Yes

Was there anything stopping me to do the assignment? No

I just really didn't want to do but I felt like I had to do it before I do anything else. This is my executive dysfunction. I wanted to get this assignment done but I just couldn't get myself to focus.

[helluo-librorums]

I don't miss the people I used to date but there are definitely some aspects of the relationships that I miss.

One relationship, the guy was my bestfriend before we decided to date. And one of the things I miss is that we were so close already so it was like nothing changed other than we could kiss and hold hands.

Another one of my relationships, I had known the guy for a while but we weren't close. When we started dating, he was very touchy, which I love. But he would also call me randomly throughout the day. That was probably the best part of the relationship. We would still text/snap but we called at least once a day. It was so nice to hear his voice after a long day. And I know he felt the same.

Like any relationship, there were bad parts. The good parts are the ones I will always cherish and will carry into my future relationships. The bad parts were lessons, but the good parts imbedded

[helluo-librorums]

Welcome to my page :)

Hi! 

I am glad you are here. This is just a quick introduction to me and some of the things I post.

I am a 21 yr old college student. I’m a biology major. My tumblr is a little all over the place, but its not too bad. I don’t really have a theme other than I just post about random things that I think about. 

For the most part, I will talk about a few main things. Such as: Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, college/being in stem, and just daily life things.

I am also a major book worm, hence my username (it means book worm in Latin). I am also a cheerleader. Which I also talk about a good bit. There’s probably more things but I am horrible at writing bios so this is the best y’all will get on here

[helluo-librorums]

So I am pet sitting for two of my coworkers and its making think about things that I haven't thought about in a long time.

Growing up I had a different childhood compared to most of my friends. My parents were divorced (this is not the difference I mean although it is a difference) and I never lived in a real house. Until I was 15 I lived in a townhouse. So it was two stories two bedrooms 1.5 bath. Not necessarily small but nothing big either. But all of my friends grow up in an actual house. Even now I live in a studio apartment, which is way smaller than the townhome. So I never really got that "house" experience. Granted I did get that experience to an extent because my grandparents had a beautiful house that I went to all the time.

The point of mentioning pet sitting, is that it is making me realized what I missed out on growing up like I did. But it also makes me excited to own a house one day. Everyone talks about learning to heal your inner child and I truly believe that is one of the things that would help my inner child.

It's such a weird experience for me staying here, because of where I live now. I've lived there for almost 7 years. So I am used to always being in the living room/kitchen/bedroom. But staying at a real house is so different from a studio apartment.