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Mates, it's time we leave this site. I can't do this shit anymore, I... I just.... I fucking can't.
I bet Jar Jar is fucking hung like a whale. God he can raw me anyday.
I spent like two? Three? Entire weeks with this sitting in my askbox and I just. I got nothing. What could I possibly answer? I tried all the “nope” gifs in this god forsaken website, I tried to draw what my face looks like every time I read this, I tried to find fanart of jar jar with his wang out and the universe was kind enough to me so that I couldn’t find any. I got nothing. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What am I gonna say? What in god’s name am I gonna say to that?!
You see, I wanna fuck general grievous. I do. I want him use all his four arms to simultaneously pull both my arms back and touch my tits as he fucks me with his mecha-schlong. I do. I wanna fuck darth Maul, pre-legs cut off or post metal legs+metal dick enhancement. I wanna lick those horns. Okay? I wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, I do. I wanna hear that hard breathing and wrap my legs over that dramatic cape while he force-chokes me and we do the do. Am I a weird robot-fucker? You bet your ass I am! Am I a tad too much on the horny side? Probably. Did I extrapolate my right to be horny on main? Fucking sue me. But this. THIS.
How do you want me to face my family and all the three (3) friends I have irl? How do you want me to walk into an elevator with a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather has been a little hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talk like every fucking old people I don’t know do, how do you expect me not to answer her with “y’know what’s weirder, someone at this very moment is thinking about Jar Jar Binks going balls-deep in them and I cannot talk about this to anyone and the knowledge of this? it’s eating me alive. ALIVE, ma’am, and I don’t mean this as some sick vore reference. Someone’s dreaming of those popped-up eyes, of that weird high-pitched voice screaming MEESA COMING while they’re filled up by Jar Jar Bink’s thick seed, and I’m just standing here while this very notion rots me to the core, taking all life away from me. It’s a nightmare. My entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. This is my floor now, ma’am, have a good day”
I leave the elevator. I probably have an appointment, but I can’t remember where, or what for. I sit down on the floor by the elevator doors. I sob for a full minute. I take the elevator back downstairs, I walk home, I collapse in bed and rub one out thinking of darth vader. I feel better.
Five minutes later, I think about this ask again, and my whole world collapses again. It’s only Tuesday. I sigh heavily and sit down to write this reply.-
Edit: a lot of this is exaggeration. Some of it is true. You get to pick what exactly.
#what the fuck#hellsite#fuck this#im done#i cant take this anymore#sorry i havent posted in like 6 months -_-#i just couldnt think of anything to post#leave#now#leave this godforsaken site#cant think of any more tags lol#thats it im out
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Some guy: *click clack cluck clock, click clack click clock*
Some random motherfucker: snoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop
#snoop dogg#lol#funny#idk lmao#sorry i havent been posting#cool#idk#snoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop
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Fuck hammer time I want screwdriver time
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Inside are two wolves. They are a gay couple that you would never think would match, but they do (opposites attract ig?) at a disco
#lipps inc#funky town#the band ghost#welcome year zero#they are coming#run#now#inside you there are two wolves#they are gay#SoundCloud#we dont talk about the video
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well I thought it was funny
The Swedish Sex Championships will finally make BBC Sports a reality!
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Thy mother is so obese, she would need five necromancers to revive her pinky finger alone! Ha!
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nonono I didn't mean you look different as in ugly its just i havent seen you in a while so i-i— oh fuck I've ruined it welp my social battery ran out sooo see ya in another 2 years
motherfucker
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The Swedish Sex Championships will finally make BBC Sports a reality!
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i had a dream that there was a penny printing error where a 1p coin said "metallica" on it ans I got lars to sign "lars" over the queen on the other side of the coin
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Ummm...ok– *NEW* Deltarune 3 plot CONFIRMED by TOBY 😱😱😱
friend inside me
#deltarune#undertale#toby fox#clickbait#mockery#omg 😱#😱#confirmed*#lol#friend inside me#Friend inside me.#[FRIEND INSIDE ME]#hel[LSITE]p me
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It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳
#1 year tumblrversary#tumblr milestone#woohoo#yayyy#hip hip hooray#hellsiteaversary#milestone#hellsite milestone#wow#cool#hooray
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I set my name to "dumbass" on nyt games and now it insults me when I play
#funny#lol#nyt games#nyt puzzles#nytimes#nyt#so rude#hey :(#asshole#i may be stupid#omg#lmaooo#lmfao#lmao#idk lmao#idk lol
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Someone please say smth I spent like 45 minutes on this I'm not good at drawing
Dual-Axes of Capatilsm: has a 10% base chance to earn number of damage as gold (e.g. 5 dmg = 5g) Increases chance by 5% for every 1000 gold you have, increases by 10% when wearing the Armour of Sam The Rich

Mode 1: Axe Sheild: Can spin at high speed to absolutely yeet weapons

Mode 2: Dual Axes: Can split apart to get an axe-scythe hybrid
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Why do people not say "okay, so, idea:" but shorten it to quesadilla
#funny#words#lol#ngl#this is kinda stupid#sorry i havent been posting#i got bored#i felt the gravitational pull of Far Cry 6
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wait booker is a cumsock
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Dual-Axes of Capatilsm: has a 10% base chance to earn number of damage as gold (e.g. 5 dmg = 5g) Increases chance by 5% for every 1000 gold you have, increases by 10% when wearing the Armour of Sam The Rich

Mode 1: Axe Sheild: Can spin at high speed to absolutely yeet weapons

Mode 2: Dual Axes: Can split apart to get an axe-scythe hybrid
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guys I think reddit is down

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