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the typo gods just blessed me with the phrase “femme fagtale” and I think that’s who I am from now on

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spotify is failing me, does anyone have song recommendations for an evil king? it keeps trying to give me “hot sexy romantasy evil” but I’m working with a crusty granpa here— I just like to put on music when I write and I feel like he’s the least developed of the three leading villains

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a friend got me to watch jjk in exchange for malevolent and now I feel like a hypocrite- one minute i’m talking about how you just gotta communicate with your entity and the next i’m screaming at this teenage boy for giving satan his credit card number

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having my gf go through her Epic! phase while I’m into Malevolent is so hard because I hear Hermes’ twink ass laugh and immediately think he’s going to start ripping people’s arms off

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curse of macbeth lives on in my dnd game yall

I did a stupid setup joke before we went to the theatre talking about how you can’t mention the dragon MacBreath or he’ll come use his MacBreath weapon on the theatre. We almost lose the fight, and my barbie-barian thinks it’s a good idea to yell MACBREATH and scare the theate direction…. then our dm nat 1d the luck check and an ancient blue dragon lighting blasted the theatre and the entire cursed audience inside + the party and boss we were fighting

we tpk’d

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arthur— there’s a man next to us on the road. it looks like he’s leaning out the passenger side of his best friend’s ride, and…. oh god. he’s trying to holler at you, arthur.

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are you really watching utena with friends if everyone doesn’t collectively yell “PENIS TOWER!!!!” when there’s that one shot of the skyline

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I’ve made the tragic mistake of reading moby dick and watching our flag means death at the same time— gay adventures on the high sea be damned, the whale haunts me and it has a new zealand accent

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the dnd tone reversal theory is real 💀

my changeling warlock made to help the dm run a tragedy plot is trying to find the best chicken parm recipe, and my barbiebarian joke character is slowly turning into the fucking winter soldier

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outtakes from the con chaos lol

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guys I think I might be gay—

anyways, late pictures of a con with my girlfriend @sloshed-sailor last september!! :D

I made her vest and cape for ranpo and my poe jacket, and I made the edgeworth cravat day-of lmao… and there’s not a single picture where it isn’t malfunctioning 😭

we thrifted the rest of it over the summer!

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malevolent brainrot so bad that I’m already collecting thrift store clothes to cover in grime for the photoshoot i’m planning with some friends in *fucking october*.

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being in a college literature program right now is just a constant game of “bungou stray dogs fan” or “exposed to hamlet at a chronically young age”, and yet you can never tell who’s who because of the constant caffeine addictions, gay drama, and threats of drowning yourself. turn off the will wood and tell me which character (whose name starts with O) threw themselves in the water feature, I need to sort you

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I’m one day out from my session 0— my aasimar rogue just asked if she *laid an egg* during that one time she was a bird, and my drow wizard and I did math so badly we fucked up the whole timeline.

this is what I get for asking my beloved idiots for a politics campaign

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DM tip to avoid information hoarders in an evil campaign:

if you want to put the note that leads to an important plot hook on a body for your party to find, put it in invisible ink and put the solution that makes it show on another body.

they’re gonna eat my plot on a nice platter and they’re gonna *like it*

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Never posted on this account I’m running my group’s first evil campaign, and I gotta scream into the void somewhere. I’ve run into the “gay/neurodivergent friends dressing for different events” wall but with pcs, helpppp— my friends came back with

1: Odysseus of Ithaca but gayer (fathomless warlock tiefling returning from 20 years of exile) (chaotic good)

2: Used to be based off dazai from bsd but got sluttier and worse (morally apathetic drow wizard) (chaotic neutral)

3: the Ceaseless Watcher (inquistive rogue who serves Cyric) (true neutral)

4: Double Trouble with an active murder plot (changeling ranger who wants to wipe out the rest of the party) (neutral evil)

and 5: Fucking Claude Frollo. (duergar paladin who runs the city’s legal system) (lawful evil)

the campaign starts this Thursday, i may be fucked. they couldn’t even agree on an alignment