#// WOW HE ACTUALLY PISSED HER OFF LOL

[igotyupls]

lights, camera, revenge; Jennie Kim X Male Reader

WC:4631, Jen and Blackpink as a whole bought me into Kpop lol. I could write on and on about them, and I will post something longer and more intricate with Jennie, sadly this is kind of all over the place, I didn’t know the direction to go. I have a heavier smut part with this, so if any of you’d like that lmk, I’m gonna post it too. Kinda didn’t add it here since this is already a mess and the smut part was just too… kind of very very dark lol

Jennie could feel Y/N's eyes burning into her as she danced with the male backup dancer on set of the you and me performance shoot. She knew he was getting pissed, his fists clenched tightly at his sides. Damn, Y/N could be so possessive sometimes.

 "Wow, Jennie! That was a sick take!" the director called out, a wide grin on his face. "Let's take a quick break and then we'll run it one more time, okay?"

Jennie flashed the director a gummy bright smile, but as soon as she got out of most staff sight, her smile dropped. She turned to Y/N, her eyes squinting. "What the fuck is your problem, babe?" she hissed, her voice low and annoyed.

Y/N's jaw was clenched, nostrils flaring. "You know damn well what my problem is, Jennie," he grunted sneering. "You were practically fucking that guy on set."

Jennie scoffed, rolling her eyes. "It's called acting, you idiot," she spat. "I'm just doing my job. It doesn't mean anything." 

"Yeah, well I don't like seeing my girl grinding all over some other dude," Y/N snapped, his hand grabbing her arm and his grip on her tightening. "You're mine, Jennie. I don't want to see you touching anyone else."

Jennie yanked her arm away, glaring at him. "Chill the fuck out, Y/N. It's not a big deal. You're being ridiculous." 

But Y/N wasn't having it. Before Jennie could react, he had a vice-like grip on her arm again, this time yanking her away from the set. "What the actual fuck, Y/N?" Jennie whisper shouted, struggling to keep up with his long legs. "Let go of me!"

The staff and producers called out to them, but Y/N ignored them, his focus on dragging Jennie away. Jennie's heart thumping, a smoothie of fear and anger burning through her. "Y/N, what the hell are you doing?" one of the producers yelled, his eyebrow furrowed. "You can't just take her like that!"

 Y/N didn't even look back at the producer, his grip on Jennie's arm only getting tighter. "This is between me and my girlfriend," he growled. "Stay the fuck out of it."

Y/N dragged Jennie down the hallway, ignoring the shouts from the staff. His jealousy and anger was boiling over, only calmed by the feeling of Jennie struggling in his grip. At the end of the hallway was a storage room, rarely used. He kicked open the door forcefully, getting a yelp from Jennie as he tugged her inside and slammed the door shut behind them.

Jennie opened her mouth to yell at Y/N again but was stopped as his lips crashed onto hers roughly. His hands gripped her waist tight, fingers digging in and bruising. Jennie whimpered into the kiss, stuck between fear and horniness as his tongue fought hers aggressively.

When he finally pulled back, Jennie gasped for breath, chest heaving. "What the fuck, Y/N?" she snapped. "You can't just drag me off set like that!"

Y/N ignored her, yanking her top over her head and groping her tits roughly over the lace of her bra. "You're mine," he growled, teeth biting at the pale skin of her neck. "Only mine. I don't want to see you touching anyone else ever again, i fucking mean it." 

Jennie tried to push him away, but his grips too strong. "Get off me, asshole!" she yelled. "I'm not your fucking property!"

But Y/N wasn't listening. He turned Jennie around, pressing her tiddies against the cold wall. His fingers made quick work of her skirt, yanking them down her legs followed with her soaked panties. Jennie knew this was wrong, that they could get in serious trouble if this got leaked. But the thrill of the risk only pushed her lust higher. 

"You like this?" Y/N growled, delivering a loud slap to her ass that had Jennie yelping. "You like it when I mark you as mine where everyone can see?" 

Jennie gritted her teeth, trying to hold back the moan that was trying to escape. "Fuck you," she spat. "I'm not your fucking toy "

Y/N chuckled. "Oh, but you are, baby." Without warning, he shoved two fingers deep into her cunt from behind. Jennie moaned out at the fingers, walls clamping down on his fingers as he started pounding them in and out of her. 

"Please, stop!" Jennie begged, hips bucking without her trying. "I don't want this!"

Y/N just laughed, his other hand continuing to maul her tits and pinch her nipples cruelly. "Your body tells me a different story, slut. You're soaking wet for me."

Jennie was reduced to a moaning, begging mess, pressing back on his hand for more fingering. "Fuck you," she cried out. "I hate you, Y/N!"

Her begging music to Y/N's ears. With a loud grunt he yanked his fingers out, leaving Jennie feeling empty and throbbing. Before she could protest, he took his belt and jeans off, freeing his massive cock. Giving her no time to prepare before slamming into her with one brutal up thrust, balls deep inside her we cunt. Jennie screamed, nails scratching at the wall as he set a hammering pace from the start.

"Fuck, you feel so good," Y/N grunted, each snap of his hips echoing against her redding ass. The sound of skin slapping skin bounced in the small storage room. Jennie lost in a daze of pleasure and pain, pushed to the edge again and again only to not get that orgasm. 

"Stop, please!" she cried, tears streaming down her face. "I can't take it anymore, Ba-be!" voice cracking.

But Y/N had no mercy, reaching around to tweak her nipples again in time with his hammering. "Shut up and take it, bitch," he growled. "You're mine" He repeats for the nth time.

Jennie's cunt gripped Y/N's cock like a vice, milking him as he pounded away ruthlessly. "You gonna come for me, slut?" he asked, yanking her hair back so her neck was out to him. 

Jennie could only moan incoherently, so far from forming words at this point. Her pussy was flooded, dripping down her thighs as her orgasm went up and up. At her nonsensical responses, Y/N slammed into her g-spot dead on, hitting it over and over without mercy.

Jennie came with a shriek , a pussy getting murdered, the sound echoed off the walls at a wavelength not possible, cunt pulsing around Y/N's cock. Her vision white out from the intensity, pussy clenching almost painfully tight as waves of orgasms wracked her body. Through it all Y/N kept fucking her, dragging her orgasm until she was a shaking mess. Only then did he find his own high, spilling thick ropes of semen deep in her pulsing pussy with a guttural groan.

They both collapsed against the walland on the floor, sweaty and tired. Jennie's legs felt like jelly, barely unnumb. Y/N pressed kisses over her shoulders, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles on her hips. "You're mine," he repeated, gentler this time. Jennie just glared at him, too exhausted to fight anymore.

Back on set, after putting the wrinkled top and skirt, Jennie was consciously aware of the drying cum between her thighs and in her cunt and the love bites scattered on her neck. She tried to cover them with makeup but they were still visible. Everyone stared as her and Y/N came back, hand in hand. The director looked pissed at the interruption but Jennie shot him an apologetic smile. "Sorry about that. Are we ready to shoot again?" Her tone was as sweet and innocent as ever but inside she still buzzed with her horniness, Y/N squeezed her hand, wordlessly letting her know he isnt done with her. never.

That night, after filming wrapped, Jennie dragged Y/N back to her apartment. As soon as the door closed, she whirled around to face him, eyes blazing. "What the fuck was that today, Y/N?" she spat. "You had no right to just drag me off like that!"

Y/N pulled her into his arms, nuzzling her neck. "I couldn't help it, baby," he murmured. "Seeing you all over that other guy, it just drove me crazy. I had to have you."

Jennie shoved him away, glaring. "I'm not your fucking property, asshole. You can't just manhandle me whenever you feel like it."

Y/N's expression darkened. "Hah, but I can, Jennie. And I will." He grabbed her wrist, dragging her to the bedroom. Jennie struggled against his grip just like before, but it was no use. He threw her onto the bed, forcefully yanking and ripping her clothes off and rummaging in the drawer.

"Y/N, stop!" Jennie yelled. "I'm serious, this has gone too far!"

But Y/N ignored her, taking out their  leather collar and leash. He tugged it on tightly around her neck, giving an experimental tug. "On your hands and knees, bitch. It's time for your punishment to begin."

Jennie's eyes widened in fear. "No! I don't want this, I’m tired !" She tried to scramble away, but Y/N was too quick. He grabbed her, forcing her into a downward doggy. Jennie whimpered as he cuffed her wrists in front of her with handcuffs.

"You're going to take what I give you, slut," Y/N growled, running his hands over her curves. "And you're going to love it.", He says, continuing as he also gets on the bed after getting naked "You're going to count each slap, understand?" At Jennie's whimpered "Yes sir"

Without warning, he gave her the first stinging smack on the ass pleasure and pain. "One!" she gasped, tears streaming down her face.

The spanks started raining down, turning her a ass rosy pink. Jennie crying through each one, begging him to stop. But Y/N showed no mercy, grinning as he watched her lose it. By the time she reached twenty, Jennie was a mess, her ass on fire but numb.

"Please, no more!" she begged. "I can't take it!"

Y/N just laughed, grabbing the leash to push her down so her wet pussy was on display. "Oh, we're just getting started, baby."

Jennie moaned at the humiliating position, already desperate for release. Y/N trailed a finger through her pussy lips, bringing it to his mouth with a hum. "So wet for me already and I've barely started. You really are a dirty little slut aren't you?"

"Fuck you," Jennie spat, glaring up at him, finally coming to her boss bitch senses. "I'm not a slut!"

Y/N's eyes farrowed. "We'll see about that." He grabbed a vibrator from their drawer, switching it on to its highest setting. Without warning pressing it flat against Jennie's swollen clit, getting back a shocked keen. " come for me, bitch. I want to hear you scream."

Jennie thrashed and screamed through her orgasm, cunt spasming helplessly around nothing. Her vision blacking out, body bowing like an arch as wave after wave of release wracked her. Through it all Y/N held the vibrator in place, dragging out her orgasm until she broke, exhausted and overstimulated.

"Fuck you," she panted, glaring up at him weakly. "I hate you." She repeats again,

Y/N just chuckled, flipping her onto her back. "Sure, and im the queen of England "

Y/N wasted no time sliding into Jennie's dripping, overstimulated cunt, eliciting a weak moan from her. "Fuck, you’re so good baby," he groaned, setting a brutal pace from the start.

Jennie tried to push him off, but her strength  was sluggish. "Get off me, you bastard," she slurred, overstim tears streaming down her face.

Y/N ignored her protests, angling his hips to jackhammer directly over her g-spot. "Such a good little fucktoy," he panted. "Taking my cock so well after I used you. You love it, don't you? Being degraded and used for my pleasure?"

 Jennie shook her head weakly. "No, I don't…please stop…" But her body betrayed her, cunt clenching around him as her orgasm built again and again.

Y/N grinned, reaching down to roughly pinch her clit. "Liar. Your pussy is practically begging for it."

Jennie threw her head back, moaning and crying until a strangled scream ripped from her throat as she came around his cock. Y/N kept ruthlessly fucking her through it, chasing his own orgasm . With a guttural groan he spilled thick ropes of cum deep inside her pulsing cunt.

They collapsed in a wet, stinky, mess. Y/N suffocating her with his body, Jennie's limbs feeling like jelly. Angling to the side, Y/N pulled her into his arms, pressing soft kisses to her forehead. "Shhh, you did so good baby. I'm so proud of you."

Jennie glared at him weakly. "Fuck you," she spat, voice hoarse. "I hate you, so so fucking much.”

Y/N just chuckled, unfazed by her. "No you don't. You love being my little slut, all mine?" He nuzzled her neck, nipping at the already bruised kin. "Admit it, Jennie. You're mine."

Jennie opened her mouth to retort, but Y/N silenced her with a kiss. She hated how her body responded, melting into his. When he finally pulled away, she was panting, desire stirring again in her belly.

"Fuck off," she whispered halfheartedly, without any real venom.

Y/N grinned, running a finger down her neck to the collar still there. "That's my girl." He gave the leash an experimental tug, getting a shiver from Jennie. "Now, I think it's time for round two, don't you?"

Jennie's eyes widened in fear. "No, Baby…I can't…" But her protests fell on deaf ears as Y/N manhandled her into missionary, roughly shoving two fingers into her sensitive cunt, after his flaccid dick slipped out,

"You're soaking wet for me, still," he growled, pumping them in and out. "Admit it, you love this. You love being my little fucktoy."

Jennie whimpered, hips rocking against his hand. "I…I… hate you and THIS!," she gasped out, even as her body betrayed her.

Y/N chuckled. "No, you don't. You love it, Being used and degraded like the dirty whore you are."

Jennie wanted to protest, to fight him off, but the feeling of his cum, his fingers, him  were too much. She was teetering on the edge, desperate for release for the nth time from all the onslaught. "Please…" she whimpered, hating how needy she sounded.

Y/N grinned, taking out his fingers and sucking it as he lined back up the vibrator against her clit. "Beg for it, slut. Beg me to let you come."

Jennie squeezed her eyes shut, pride fighting with her body's needs. But the need was too strong. "Please, sir!" she cried out. "Please let me come, I need it so bad!"

Y/N's grin widened as he pressed the vibrator harderagainst her. "Good girl." He kept up the stimulation, watching with happiness as Jennie thrashed like a kitty in water, and screamed through her climax number… doesn’t matter.

When the aftershocks finally ended, Jennie lays there panting, fully spent. Y/N leaned down, pressing soft kisses to her face

Y/N gazed down at her, eyes darker. "Ready for round three, baby?"

Jennie knew she should say no, to put a stop to this madness and to this lunatic she calls her boyfriend. But the throbbing between her thighs told a different story. "Yes," she whispered out, hating herself.

Y/N grinned, flipping her back onto her stomach. Jennie whimpered as he roughly yanked her hips up just like before, presenting her dripping cunt to him, still spilling his white seed. "Good girl." He lined up and thrust home in one motion, eliciting a cry from Jennie.

Straight from the go a punishing pace, each brutal snap of his hips driving his cock deeper into her sensitive pussy. Jennie clawed at the sheets, tears streaming down her face as the stimulation breaks her piece by piece..

"Fuck, soooo tight," Y/N growled, reaching around to pinch and tug at her clit. "Such a greedy little cunt, milking my cock like a pro."

Jennie whimpered, hips moving on their own to meet his pumps. Hating herself for her body's horniness, she squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block out the bliss.

But Y/N wasn't having it. He yanked her head back by the hair, forcing her to meet his eyes. "Look at me, slut," he roared. "I want to see the pleasure on your face as I use you."

Jennie's eyes flew open, a strangled cry escaping her as her orgasm crushed over her. Her cunt clamped down on Y/N's cock like a vice, milking him for all his semen.

 Y/N grunted his own release, spilling thick ropes of cum deep inside her already creamy pussy, falling, both of them panting heavily.

Jennie stays there, fully exhausted and ashamed. How could she let him abuse her? She hated Y/N, hated how he made her feel. And yet, a small  part of her needed his touch, his domination.

Y/N nuzzled her neck, pressing kitten kisses over her jaw. "You were perfect, as always baby," he murmured. "I love you so much."

Jennie wanted to push him away, to scream that she’ll call the cops. But the words died on her lips, instead replacing by a soft sigh as she melted into his chest.

The next morning, Jennie woke up alone. Stretching with a groan, she winced at the soreness between her legs.. Stumbling to the bathroom, she pissed and washed the dry come out of her before standing infront of the mirror and taking in the marks littering her skin - handprints, love bites, even bruises around her wrists and neck,

Bile and shame washed over her as she stared at her reflection. How could she let this happen? Y/N took things too far, and she did nothing to stop him.

A noise from the kitchen had her padding out, still naked. Y/N stood at the stove, humming to himself. At the sight of her, his eyes lit up. "Morning, baby. Sleep well after I fucked you like the good slut you are?"

Jennie stared at Y/N, an inferno erupting in her eyes as his words sunk in. He thought he could call her a slut again after she said she wasn’t a million time. Fat fucking chance. 

"Let me make one thing clear, you arrogant piece of shit," she spat, hands balling into fists at her sides. "I am not your fucking slut. This is MY life - mine and mine alone. You wanna keep playing in it? Then you damn well better start showing some respect."

Y/N took a step forward, a sneer curling his lip. "Or what? You gonna run off and cry about it? Face it Jennie, you're weak without me."

A humourless laugh burst from Jennie's throat. "Weak? Bitch please. I'm the one with the power and fame here, not you. One word from me and your sorry ass is out on the curb. So if I were you, I'd choose my next words very carefully." 

She advanced on him, jabbing a finger into his chest. "You got two options - start treating me right, or get the fuck out. It's up to you whether you stay in my world or not. Now what's it gonna be, tough guy?"

For a long moment they stared each other down, tension suffocating in the air. Jennie refused to back down, meeting his glare with one of her own. Finally, Y/N broke eye contact with a scowl. "Fine. Have it your way, princess. But don't come crying to me when you realise how much you need me."

Jennie rolled her eyes. "Yeah yeah, save your bullshit excuses. Actions speak louder than words. Now, are we gonna continue our fuckfest?" She turned and walked back towards the bedroom, swaying her hips intentionally. "Well? I'm waiting, big boy."

Y/N followed with a hum, his need for her overriding his bruised ego...for now. But Jennie wasn't done putting him in his place yet. As soon as they reached the bedroom she shoved him down on the bed. 

"Clothes. Off. Now." She commanded, hands on hips. With a grumble Y/N listened, stripping his boxers off for her hungry cat eyes. Jennie took her time roaming her eyes over his body, enjoying the way he squirmed under her inspection. Only when his dick was standing at full attention did she get closer.

"Beg for it." She breathed, trailing a nail over his ticklish dick.

Y/N grit his teeth. "Jennie-"

She tutted, gripping him in a fist. "I said beg."

A groan escaped him as she started  to slowly pump him. "Fuck...please, I need you. Please touch me, baby."

Jennie grinned, giving his cock a rough squeeze that had him hissing. "Better. Now get on your back - it's time I put you in your place." Without waiting for a reply  she shoved him back and straddled his chest, rubbing her dripping cunt over his face. "Lick."

Y/N's hands came to her hips, holding her in place as his tongue came out to taste her. Jennie sighed in bliss, grinding herself against his mouth. His tongue slid inside her, lapping at her juices like a man dying. 

"Fuck yes, just like that." Jennie panted, riding his face. She gripped the headboard for leverage as she rode his mouth, using his tongue to bring herself closer and closer to her orgasm. When her orgasm hit she cried out, gushing over his cheeks and chin.

"Good boy." She cooed, giving his hair a tug once she caught her breath. "Now it's your turn." she said getting up and Without warning she sank down on his cock, taking him to the hilt in one slick slide. 

"Fuuuuck." Y/N groaned, hands flying to her hips. But Jennie wasn't having any of that - she pinned his wrists above his head with an iron grip. 

"Ah ah, who's in control here?" She purred, beginning to ride him slow and deep. Y/N could only throw his head back with a moan, completely under her spell as she used his body like her personal toy. 

Jennie set a fast pace, bouncing on his cock like it was her job. The slap of her ass on his pelvis and their matching moans bounced through the room. She watched his face intently, loving the way he fell to pieces under her, she moved her hips up, down, left, right, hell she even almost broke her own pelvis just to take his semen out. Only when he was begging unintelligibly did she let him come, clamping down just right to pull his orgasm from him. 

"That's one." She grinned, lifting off his softening member. Y/N just lay there panting, still reeling from the intensity of his climax. But Jennie wasn't finished with him yet.

Jennie gazed down at Y/N, a wicked smile spreading across her face. "That's just the beginning, baby," she purred, trailing a finger down his chest. "I'm just getting started with you."

Y/N swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. "What do you mean?" he asked, a hint of what was almost fear in his voice.

Jennie leaned in close, her lips brushing against his ear. "I mean, I'm going to break you," she whispered, her voice dripping with pure hate and promise. "I'm going to make you beg, over and over again."

Without a second, she grabbed a fistful of his hair and yanked his head back, exposing his throat. Y/N let out a gasp, his eyes wide.

"You think you can just manhandle me and get away with it?" Jennie hissed, her nails digging into his scalp. "You're going to learn your place, Y/N. And it's beneath me. You fucking harass me, You dragged me away and embarrassed, You fucking raped me” she spits out.

She released his hair, only to run her fingers down his neck , over his chest, and down to his re hardening wet dick. Y/N shook at her touch, his hips bucking involuntarily.

"Please, Jennie," he begged, his voice barely audible. "I'm sorry, I'll be good, I promise."

Jennie's eyes narrowed, and she gave his dick a rough squeeze, making Y/N moan painfully.. "Sorry doesn't cut it, baby," she said, her voice dripping with disgust. "You're going to have to win my forgiveness."

With a fast motion, she straddled his hips again, her creamy creampied folds hovering above his throbbing purple headed dick. Y/N let out a whine, his hands reaching for her hips, but Jennie slapped them away.

"Ah ah ah," she tsked, wagging a finger in his face, as if to a dog. "No touching. You don't get to touch me until I say so."

Y/N whimpered, his fingers twitching with the need to feel her. Jennie chuckled, slowly leaning herself down on his cock, inch by agonising inch. Y/N let out a groan, his eyes rolling back in his head.

"Fuck, Jennie," he gasped, his hips straining to thrust up into her.

Jennie placed her hands on his chest, holding him in place. "Ah! No.," she scolded, "I'm the one in charge now, remember?" She started to move, grinding her hips in slow, lusty circles, earning moans and whimpers from Y/N.

"Please, Jennie," he begged, his voice ragged with desperation. "I need to touch you, I need to feel you."

Jennie leaned in close, her lips brushing against his. "Tough luck, baby," she breathed. "Shouldve thought about this before doing what you did."

Without warning, she slammed her hips down, burying him to her g spot. Y/N cried out, his back arching off the bed. Jennie set a ungodly pace, riding him like a woman possessed, her nails shoving and scratching down his chest.

"Fuck, you feel so good," she moaned, her eyes half-lidded with lust. "I could do this all day."

Y/N was a shaking, whimpering mess under her, his fingers fisting the sheets in an attempt to stop reaching for her. Jennie could feel his balls tighten and his cum building, breathing worse and worse.

"Oh no you don't," she ordered, abruptly stopping her hips. Y/N let out a frustrated grunt, his hips bucking up in a desperate attempt to chase his release.

"Please, Jennie," he begged, his voice cracking. "I need to come, please let me come."

Jennie tsked, shaking her head. "Not yet, baby," she said, a sadistic shine iin her eye. "You've got a lot more to earn before I let you come again."

She lifted herself off his cock, getting a whimper from Y/N. "Now, be a good boy and get on your hands and knees," she commanded, her tone no nonsense.

Y/N hesitated for a moment, his male ego fighting with his dick. But one look at Jennie's steely eyes had him crawling to obey, his throbbing penis swaying with the movement.

Jennie hummed in approval, running a finger down his spine. "That's a good boy," she purred. "Now, let's see how much you can take, like I did last night."

Without warning, she brought her hand down on his ass with a loud crack, the sound echoing in the room. Y/N yelped, his body jerking, but Jennie's grip on his hips kept him in place.

"Count," she commanded, her voice colder than his.

"One," Y/N gritted out, his teeth clenched from the sting.

Jennie delivered another hard slap, releasing a strangled cry. "Two," Y/N gasped, his fingers digging into the sheets.

The blows continued, Jennie's hand raining down on his red ass, her own hand numb and on the verge of shattering. Y/N's cries grew louder and more desperate with each spank, his body trembling with the effort to hold still.

"Fifteen," he choked out, his voice raw with pain and lust, precum leaking.

Jennie paused, running a soothing hand over his abused asscheek. "Good boy," she murmured, her tone dripping with sarcasm. "You're doing so well." She murmured using the words he used, taking her sweet revenge.

[deadghosy]

HAZBIN HOTEL X ALBERT/FLAMINGO! READER

prompt: after causing chaos in life is paradise, you accidentally clicked the wrong “alt” button.

Oh wow- listen…I’m in my Albert phase guys…so yeah. ANYWAYSSS-

You just got done making your Roblox video as you wanted to exit out of it. You were going for the alt + 4 button only for the alt to look red and shine into your face. The light blinding your sight made you scream as you opened your eyes to see you are in a new area.

…. “Am I in hell…” you said in a high pitch voice. You panicked out a pitch scream gaining weird looks from the sinners. You still kept your human look but as you screamed, the control panel of admins show up. You stopped screaming immediately with an “oh.” And smiled evily

After wrecking most of the pride ring, you felt tired. Seeing an advertisement on tv about a hotel that redeems sinners, you thought maybe you could do some good here. So you pulled out a keyboard and type to teleport to the said hotel

You can go into the wrath, pride, and gluttony ring. It’s pretty real as you have the wrath to destroy things when pissed off. You’re prideful that you can’t be destroyed, and you have the gluttony to eat. A lot.

I can see you just having a small flamingo demon pet following you around. Literally you would make it bite and stab people. You taught it how to do the billy bounce.

The crew most definitely thought you were schizophrenic because you talk out loud as if you were talking to someone 

BIG HEADCANNON THAT YOU HAVE ZOOMIES AROUND THE HOTEL😭

“I start stabbing, now that the lights are out?” “Albert/Reader, please no.” Charlie says holding your arms down. The power went out and you were craving blood.

You’re just a little gremlin :D

Imagine how chaotic it was to not fling someone out of the hotel for fun 😭 LMAO A SINNER FLINGING ACROSS THE WHOLE PENTAGRAM.

“I’m taking away their happiness in a good way!” You say smiling as you drag a resident away from Charlie who seems traumatized. You were like an alastor 0.2 but more happy actually.

LMAO YOU HAVING A BAN HAMMER SO WHEN A RESIDENT IS BEING AN ASSHOLE YOU JUST SLAM THE HAMMER ON THEIR HEAD WITH A “BOOP”

I can imagine you having the same physique as the og Albert. Literally one minute you look like your animal crossing character, and the next thing they know you are some buff Florida man.

“I’m going to make them regret being born.” You said as you clicked an admin that made your skin black with red eyes. The angels came towards you as your cut their heads off.

The whole cast was in shocked seeing a human like you being so powerful with just a panel no one can touch.

“Being a baby will not prevent me from shooting you.” You said jokingly as this toddler was winning uno. The mother ran away with her child as you screamed out uno.

Angel started to rant about what he does for his job and how he basically seller his soul to this moth porn demon. After he told you things what the demon does to Angel. You snapped.

“BITCH I WILL SHOOT YOU!” Yells reader as they cocked their gun. Basically the whole crew has to hold you back as Valentino is pissing himself.

Vox didn’t even know who you were until Valentino started having nightmares and random shadows in his room. (The shadows were you lol) Vox had to look you up and try to find who tf you were. You were a YouTuber. That all it showed up on his feed as he scoffs.

Husk has no opinion on you. He only knows you as that guy with a flamingo. He would sometimes side eye you while you do crazy shit. But matter of fact you two are chill.

“We have different ways of expressing ourselves..” you say to Angel trying to comfort him. “I like this way, he can’t defend himself. And I like that.” You say shooting down a sinner while in battle. Angel dust just side eyes you as if you were actually crazy.

You’re not allowed to go into turf war with him no more.

Velvette has no legit problems with you. Dead ass you and her might be fashion partners. HAVE YOU SEEN ALBERT’S DRIP ON INSTA?! That MAN IS GOOD!

You have so much wanted posters, even you brag to others at how cool you look while destroying someone’s house. All because you were bored.

Charlie is mostly worried for your mental health while Vaggie just knows that you aren’t really the most mental stable in the group.

“STOP DOING THAT! STOP CRYING! What are you a baby?!” You say while smacking away a whole imp baby that was crying beside you on the merry-go-round

Charlie’s eyes widen at what you did. You were like a man child.

I can headcannon you deadass bombed the Vees tower out of pettiness. It was just funny seeing Vox shocked to his damn boots that his home was now gone.

Lucifer made you a duck flamingo cause of how he was trying to be nice to you. He knew you wasn’t a sinner or an angel of sorts. But you were a human that he never seen before. He probably makes you some damn pancakes if you want them.

Lucifer would probably ask if you have a flamingo demon form because you told the crew that you go by flamingo and Albert. You just stood there confused to what this short man was saying. But you just nodded trying to see if you could actually turn into a flamingo.

Headcannon on you just actually helping around by just replacing and changing furniture. You help Charlie with trust exercises as the resident are just confuse at a human being here.

“WHO needs powers, when you have a gun!” You yell excited pulling out a gun from your admin control. You shot downa sinner who was trying to fight you. Alastor just doesn’t see why how your “guns” are more powerful. They don’t even have angelic metal.

Carmilla carmine had seen how you legit shot an angel down with a simple looking gun. It was insane but amazing. She definitely called you down to her place so she can see what your bullets are made out of.

Imagine how you basically see people’s/sinner’s names as if it was a name tag aka username. You would go around saying their name out loud as they look at you scared and crazy. “Hello Hakka!” “How you know my name?!!!!” 😕

Rosie adores you, you may be man child that’s like a gremlin. But you are so sweet and helping. Alastor made you meet her and honestly, it was a great meet and greet. Honestly 10/10.

Headcannon on you and Niffty both killing bugs together. You use your ban gun as Niffty uses a sewing needle. This sweet girl made you a big crown, you better appreciate it.

Alastor had messed with your food making you pissed off. It was the end of the day and you hadn’t eat anything due to not taking care of yourself much. So your reaction was justified when you see alastor’s grins widening.

“I hope you choke on your next meal.” You say as your voice had suddenly boomed across the hotel. It was like as if your mic boosted it, but you don’t have one.

You and Alastor have like a sibling relationship as you two just want to watch people suffer. Literally it’s funny as hell when it’s that one Xbox meme.😭

“MOM SAYS ITS MY TURN TO CAUSE SUFFERING!” You say trying to get over Alastor’s tall body as he causes chaos in the pentagram city.

Sir Pentious didn’t like you at all. Like he was actually scared at his crazy and psychotic you are at times. But when he saw how calm and laid back you actually were. He actually started to warm up close to you. 

The egg boiz follow you around asking if your pet flamingo could play with them. It was so cute as they play with your pet flamingo.

Cherri absolutely loves you and your destructive behavior. Literally you two are a deadly duo cause you would give her some of your admin powers and take it back.

You once actually set up a limb store, literally you were getting that money✨😈 you had chopped off so much limbs got your deer customers.

I can see you actually taking people’s souls lol. You just take souls for fun and not for contract which leaves some overlords confused and scared of your powers.

Heaven would be scared of you personally. Like you are such a menace, sera sent your ass back to hell. Your human appearance was still the same tho lol.

Adam and you, beef on sight. “Why do you even have that pink bird? What are you, ret@rded?” “No but your mother is.” You said back while flipping him off.

Sera doesn’t like you. Your chaotic energy and your “evil” doing are not prohibited in paradise. She might tell Big G about how a human is in hell in perfect condition.

Emily heard about your presence by sera, she wanted to meet you but then again. You are back in hell. But she hopes to meet you one day.

See, me personally you would rob a bank for fun and then give it to some homeless imps in the wrath ring. It’s just you doing random shit while bored.

I can imagine you turning someone into the hulk. You deadass have so much power that it’s concerning and crazy for the hotel crew and rest of hell. You have alot of powers and you can turn people into some green buff human?!?

[appleblondie0397]

Lucifer didn't sleep with Eve lmao

I had to make this post to make it clear because I've seen a few ppl say the same thing. When Lucifer said "Well your first wife didn't seem to hate what I had to offer" he was clearly talking about Lilith and the fact that they married later, then he says "or the second" implying that he gave her something too. its a play on words because he did give both of them something but what he gave was completely different! for Lilith he gave himself and for Eve he gave the apple! so both of them did like what he had to offer, but it's important to remember what the offer actually was! that's why ep 1 takes the time to explain what happened between the 4 of them. the "bow chika wow wow" was just Lucifer being a little shit to piss Adam off because he doesn't like him and he's rubbing it in Adams face that both his brides chose something he had over Adam. so no they didn't sleep together, viv and the team are just super slick with their jokes lol

[raventreehall]

a storm of swords dash simulator

🍋ladyjonquil Follow

i don't want to reveal too much but i had a really great day today hawking and riding and received some really exciting news (and maybe a potential marriage offer!) wow wow wow!!! haven't felt like this in so long 🥰

🤡florianthefool Follow

i'm so happy for you my jonquil

🐦littlefinger Follow

thanks for sharing my lady

🏹kissedbyfire Follow

PISSED OFF AT MY BF RN 🤬🤬🤬 NEVER TRUST A SOUTHERNER AND ESPECIALLY NEVER TRUST A CROW!!!!!!!

👸🏼daenerys-targaryen-tracker Follow

🐎raeqqo Follow

by the law of the dothraki she must return to vaes dothrak to take her place alongside the crones of the dosh khaleen. it is known.

🐉3heads Follow

shut up and go sack a defenseless city or something

🍁weirwoodzz Follow

hey do you guys remember when theon greyjoy took winterfell last year and killed the stark boys? has anyone heard anything else about that? feel like it kind of just disappeared from the news cycle, what happened to greyjoy?

🪓cerwynnation Follow

lord bolton's bastard killed him

🍁weirwoodzz Follow

oh really? wow. kind of extreme but deserved i guess

💗ramsays-sharpest-blade Follow

Ramsay isn't a bastard, King Joffrey legitimized him two months ago and Lord Roose is going to make him castellan of the Dreadfort soon. He loves his son and trusts his abilities. Plus, Ramsay is being awarded for his efforts in saving Winterfell and putting a stop to the ironborn raids in the North by being betrothed to Arya Stark—would a bastard be granted that honor? I don't think so.

Also, Theon isn't dead, Ramsay is (rightfully) flaying him for his crimes in the dungeons beneath the Dreadfort. Gods, I'd love to see Ramsay thrust the knife under his skin!!!!! 😜

#ramsay bolton #house bolton #our blades are sharp #theon greyjoy

🐐the-goat Follow

i'm boutta come into thome real money real thoon 😈 💎💎💎💎💯

🏰freygirl73 Follow

ughhhh my sister is getting married tmrw and my brothers keep going on about getting revenge on king robb while he's here for the feast... like i just wanted some food :/// iswtg that's the only good thing about my siblings weddings and now they're saying there won't even be any and i'm gonna have to go into hiding before the bedding ceremony or something. why can't my family just be NORMAL

🐟greenfork Follow

TW: Red Wedding, death, violence

A masterpost on what happened at the Twins and what it means for the Northern independence cause, the War of the Five Kings, and the realm in general.

Also a bunch of links on how you can help people affected in the Riverlands.

Keep Reading

🍵bowlobrown Follow

HELL YEAH BROTHER 🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

🔥heatofdorne Follow

i wanna ***** ********* on ellaria sand's **** and *** ****** then call in oberyn and ***** **** them both until **** *****

🤎pate7534 Follow

🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

🌊onthesunsetsea Follow

why are there so many crabs on my dash rn

🐺direwolfing Follow

TYWIN LANNISTER IS DEAD 🦀🦀🦀🦀

💙cassssanna Follow

actually i think it's still for king joffrey

🦁lann1sporter Follow

lol i thought it was for robb stark

🥂arborgold Follow

maybe it's for the mountain?

⬛️ freezingmyarseoffonthewall Follow

DOLOROUS EDD LORD COMMANDER 300 AC

⬛️ freezingmyarseoffonthewall Follow

DOLOROUS EDD WILL LEAD US TO VICTORY AGAINST THE OTHERS

🕊️ just-a-humble-sparrow Follow

mother have mercy i was walking by the great sept of baelor (i wanted to pay my respects to our blessed king joffrey) but i was blocked by a knight of the kingsguard—i believe it was one of the kettleblacks, unfortunately i always forget which one has been elevated to the kingsguard—because the queen was keeping vigil over her son, so i prayed outside instead. yet only a few minutes passed when i swear i saw the kingslayer arrive (he seemed to be missing a hand!) and enter. then, and this is the most disturbing part, i swear to the father that i heard noises of fornication coming from inside! i know for a fact that the only other person inside was the queen mother. could the rumors be true? i feel dirty even writing this. i wonder if i should tell my septon.

❤️‍🔥stannis-sweep Follow

stannis has literally been telling y'all and you didn't listen 🙄

🏳️ bannerless Follow

is it just me or is lady stoneheart kinda 👀

[genericpuff]

wait wait wait, regarding that Minthe post, you're telling me that Rachel literally wrote the character as having BPD.....and portrayed her as an abusive mean piece of shit??? WOW. fucking WOW. sorry for being so angry, but even if she "retconned" that - it's still so god damn disrespective. as someone who has BPD it hurts so much to see my mental illness villanised :(

ugh I'm so sorry pal. and I don't blame you for being angry about it, like I don't even have BPD and I'M fucking pissed LOL like I can understand why Rachel might have wanted to backtrack from that knowing fully well that Minthe's story wasn't gonna have a happy ending, but writing her with BPD in the first place and then BACKTRACKING from it as soon as she likely got heat for it (or just realized it wasn't a good look) isn't much better because it means now all she's done is written the stigmatized negative effects of BPD into her character without showing the more positive outlooks of healing and managing. Maybe that was doomed to happen considering Minthe is someone who doesn't get a happy ending in the myths, but it begs the question of why she'd write her with BPD to begin with because in hindsight it really does seem like she just wanted to use it as a way to make her "evil".

But like, when you read the actual episode, you can SEE the potential there for character growth, you can SEE that she's aware of her actions - but doesn't understand why she's "like that" which is a VERY common feeling among people with undiagnosed mental illnesses - but it was never meant to be.

Like jfc not only is it HEAVILY IMPLIED, but again, the episode is literally called "Splitting". And we see exactly that with Minthe, who can't seem to rationalize with herself that she messed up.

But... that leads me to another point that I failed to mention in that first ask response: she DIDN'T mess up. Like, yes, she messed up by escalating it to the point of slapping Hades, but it wasn't her fault that she didn't make it to her date with Hades. Whose fault was it?

Continuously throughout the first season we see Thetis being an awful influence who manipulates and gaslights Minthe. They're "friends", but it's clear Thetis does not have Minthe's best interests in mind. In this very scene we see Thetis manipulate Minthe and even attempt to get her so drunk that she won't be able to show up to her date. And then of course when that plan works and Minthe freaks out, Thetis spins it around on Minthe in a very passive-aggressive way.

But of course, the narrative has to find a way to turn this whole thing on Minthe being the bad guy. Hence we get the slap which shifts the focus entirely away from what led up to it back onto Hades who has, in a lot of ways, put her in a situation that she can't control. And of course, being in those kinds of situations does not help with mental health.

Like, sorry, I'm really going off here now, but... the slap happens in Episode 76.

When is it finally addressed again? Episode 103.

It took Rachel nearly THIRTY EPISODES to finally bring it back to Minthe, and in that time the reader has spent SEVERAL EPISODES reading about how sad and lonely Hades is, and about how cute and lovey he is with Persephone. The reader has not had ANY time to reflect on Minthe's circumstances, because it completely pivots away from her to focus on H x P as a sort of distraction from the fact that Minthe is a victim in her own right.

And when it DOES return to Minthe in 103, we get this harrowing reminder that her entire life is dependent on Hades-

And once again, here comes Thetis to the "rescue", reinforcing the negative feedback loop that Minthe is trapped in where she's put in unhealthy situations. She drags her to a bar and the whole time Minthe is not having fun because she's understandably still reeling from what happened.

Now we DO get some character development here, where Minthe realizes exactly what I've just finished explaining, that Thetis isn't her friend, that she'd rather not have Thetis as a friend than continue being talked down to and manipulated.

But then, as we know, because Rachel still needs Minthe to be the "bad guy", the breakup between Hades and Minthe winds up being all about Persephone from a POV that attempts to villainize Minthe for being "jealous" (rather than focusing on how shitty Hades actually is for having an emotional affair with Persephone to begin with) and then Minthe goes right back to hanging out with Thetis anyways for the sake of having the "evil other girl" who wants to "ruin" H x P's relationship.

It's not until Season 3 that we finally see Minthe tell Thetis to fuck off for good, but by then it's too little too late, and Minthe has lost an entire character arc. Rachel tries to go "see! Minthe's life is so much better now that she's taking care of children!" but that's an entirely different solution to a problem Minthe never had. She never got treatment for her BPD. She just got away from H x P which, while is a good thing, isn't actually analyzed as such. It's treated more as a "good thing" for H x P and the readers, because now they don't have to be subjected to Minthe's evil scheming anymore, something something "the evil is defeated". And don't even get me started on this comic's problem with constantly resolving female characters' story arcs through motherhood.

It bums me out so fucking much. Minthe deserved so much better. She's one of the many characters in LO who make it so painfully ironic when they're done dirty, because despite Rachel's attempts to write a "feminist retelling" that focuses on "moving on from trauma", she's inadvertently done more damage to feminism and the stigmas around mental health and trauma through her assassination of grounded and realistic and relatable characters like Minthe and Demeter who are shown ZERO empathy or understanding for their actions (unless it can be done so by making Persephone and Hades into the heroes). It happens so often throughout the comic it almost feels like how the comic markets itself as a "progressive feminist retelling" is some sick joke that I'm just not getting.

[love-byers]

can you speak more on your experience becoming a byler cos this always fascinates me, especially when it's people who were once milevens thanks!

absolutely, i love talking about this lol

so i watched stranger things 1 when it came out in 2016 & i was 12. my media literacy wasn't great at the time, and like most people i liked mike and el's little romance. but i did think their kiss came way too fast and kind of out of nowhere. wasn't a fan of that. i thought it would've been better if they didn't get to kiss and made both the audience and mike and el wait. and i was like "uhhh how does she even know what a kiss is" but whatever

then s2 came out, i was 13. i LOVED mike and will's relationship, maybe even more than i liked mike and el's. when mike grabbed wills hand i VIVIDLY remember thinking "they would be such a good couple, but they'd never do that. oh well!". at this point in my life i was realizing my sexuality and was super into queer media. i say that just so you know i was receptive to queer representation and enjoyed it. but to me at that time, i saw stranger things for the massive success it was, famous enough that they'd never have a main character be queer. it just wasn't a thought in my mind that it could ever happen.

i loved the snowball scene and thought mike and el were super cute. i remember thinking "wow their bond must be so deep and they take each other very seriously. it's them against the world"

i was 15 and BEYOND pissed when s3 came out and it was clear mike and el were reduced to comedly relief. i wanted their relationship to be lovable like it was in s2. i hated how mike became so unlikable when he was with el when he was previously shown to be so loyal and caring. and above all, i hated how it was like mike and will's relationship in 2 never happened. i remember thinking "wtf mike?? do you not remember how protective you were of him before?? how close you were??" at the time i thought it was bad writing and it honestly turned me off of s3 and i didn't finish it for like 2 years.

when i finally did i was a bit confused. i remember watching the rain fight and thinking "wow that felt more like a breakup than mike and el's actual breakup" it just struck me how sad it was compared to the breakup. but my heteronormativity towards stranger things was so strong that i didn't even clock will being gay until someone pointed it out for me. and i definitely didn't clock that will was in love with mike. i remember noticing how mike and will were always together and positioned next to each other like jancy and lumax were. but for some reason, and i really don't know why, i just didn't really absorb it.

what really surprised me was the s3 finale, like the final goodbye scenes. during mike and will's i saw mikes reaction to will saying "not possible" and i was like.....hm. he sure seems happy. but whatever

mike and el's goodbye scene just confused me. i didn't understand why mike acted like he didn't know what she was talking about when he spent all season trying to say i love you, i didn't understand why mike didn't close his eyes or kiss her back when he spent all season trying to say i love you, i didn't understand why el walked away and winced, i didn't understand why mike looked like that when she walked away AFTER HE SPENT ALL SEASON TRYING TO SAY I LOVE YOU, and i didn't understand why the music sounded so happy as if NONE OF IT HAPPENED. and when mike hugged karen i was like, why does he look like he just realized something??? wtf is happening???

i didn't realize there was any romance between mike and will until s4. actually, i heard people saying will was gay and in love with mike and i was like "pshh no way". then i saw the trailer where el says will likes someone and i was like "oh my god they did make him in love with mike". but again, for some strange reason, i felt like it was a decision made solely for s4. VERY stupid of me.

here i go more in depth about my specific reactions to s4 scenes but theres one i didn't mention and it's the way mike looks will up and down when he says "cool". i was like "uhh that was kinda flirty..."

but i finished vol 1 thinking about byler a little more. i heard there was a masterdoc about them so i read it, and for the first bit of it i didn't really believe any of it. then i saw the eyewitness parallel and i was like HHHHWHAAAAAAAT???????????????????? i VIVIDLY remember thinking "how is this possible?? didn't this come out of nowh--" and then it ALL hit me in the face. my jaw literally dropped. it's like i rewatched all of st in 3 seconds and everything made sense. the eyewitness parallel finally made me accept the writers would have gay characters and romance, and that was all it took. i never went back. mike and will's bond in s2, the decline of mike and el's relationship, mike and will's tension in s3, mikes reaction to not possible, mike reaction to el saying i love you, all of it made sense. at that point i was like 17 and my media literacy and love/skill for writing had grown a lot. the very first tiktok i made about byler was about how it doesn't make sense for the writers to build this up for so long just for it not to go anywhere, because it doesn't at all. and things just grew from there. i bled blue and yellow and i still do!

it was almost entirely heteronormativity keeping me from seeing byler earlier, so i talk about that a lot. because once you remove that, EVERYTHING makes perfect sense

[arcanesea]

sparks fly

PAIRING: yang jeongin x reader GENRE: best friends to lovers, jeongin has a f!fans that annoys reader lol WC: 1.1k WARNING: profanity, jeongin is a little mean:[

"Special delivery from your 'secret admirer'." You said, making an air quote after slamming the coffee cup with a little too much force. You took your seat across Jeongin, huffing.

He looked inside the cup, pushing it in your direction, "You drink first, it might be poisoned."

You flip the ungracious finger in front of his face. Throwing a mocking smile. His so-called secret admirer (who lives directly across your dorm) has been making some inquiries over the last couple of weeks. Coffee, bottled beverages, cookies, even sandwiches, only for Jeongin. She waited in front of your door every morning, requesting you to deliver the goods to Jeongin.

When asked why she didn't do it herself, she claims that she doesn't have the courage yet. Along with that, she also asks you to play matchmaker. You would've agreed if she's not actually acting so annoying, asking for a selfie or even a photo of Jeongin with the stuff she sends.

"What if he thought this was all from me?" you ask one day, holding the tuna sandwich in your hand. Jeongin hates tuna, he prefers chicken sandwiches or plain bacon.

"Why? Do you plan on tricking him into believing that?" she asks back, confused. "You're just friends, right? You always said so, Jeongin does too."

Right… Friends…

Today was probably your tipping point because she's in a hurry, and you don't have class until later in the afternoon so you planned to sleep in a little bit. But persistent as ever, she knocks violently at your door, waking your roommates who had the day off, basically pissing the both of you and now you're just cranky.

"Did she annoy you?" Jeongin asked. He swirls the cup in a figure-8 motion, trying to assess your mood this morning.

"You think?" you respond. You took out your laptop, trying not to be a pile of negative energy. "I don't get it why she's so persistent, it's not like you're going to date her anyways, right?" you ask Jeongin without looking in his direction. Truth is, you're afraid that he might've said that you're wrong.

"Well since she seems to be perceived in a bad way by my best friend? Yeah, I think I'll pass," he answers. Your heart sank at the word best friend, but that's just the way you are. His hands leave the cup, tousling your hair.

"It's not like that, it's just… she's hell-bent on sending you this stuff, through me, like I'm some goddamn owl." You press on your keyboards violently. "And I'm still nice for actually giving it to you. I could've eaten them all by myself!" You exclaim. You had, in fact, thought about that. But that would make you look so bad, that even your roommates vote against doing so in case of karma.

"Are you not going to drink it?" you ask, eyeing the coffee. "I haven't eaten anything and I feel I could eat someone right now."

"I'll get you a new one," he said, standing up from his seat. "Sandwich?"

"Tuna," you answered, offering him a smile. "Thanks, you're the best!"

He grabs the coffee cup with him and walks inside the cafeteria to order a sandwich. He looked around the room when his eyes caught a glimpse of the so-called secret admirer. Well, he found that bit by himself, taking notes from the description you gave him along the time. His eyes met hers and he dropped the coffee cup on the bin. Not even taking a sip from it.

Jeongin hesitates a bit before actually approaching her. She didn't notice him at first until one of her friends whispered in her ear, pointing at him. He leans on the table, throwing a vile smirk. Luckily the cafeteria is so bustling with people that no one even notices the scene.

"Listen," Jeongin said. "I appreciate your effort, but you need to quit."

"Why? Did your little friend say something bad about me?" She dared herself to ask. Jeongin clicks his tongue, unimpressed. "Am I wrong to try? You're single anyways."

"Wow, you really got some attitude," he responds with a smile. "I can't tolerate an ungrateful person," he expels, surprising her. He's not one to talk shit about someone else, but when they mess with you, they're looking for a fight with him too (even when you're capable of picking fights by yourself, it makes him feel much better if you don't have to).

"You need to apologize, or you don't have to. Either way, this stops now." Jeongin said, "I'll pay you back if you want. Let's not waste each other's energy on something impossible to achieve, and that means the possibility of you and me together."

Without waiting for her response, Jeongin walked out and took his place in front of you. Handing you the tuna sandwich.

"You don't have to do that, you know," you said, opening the paper wrap and thanking him. You saw him approaching her table earlier when you went in to wash your hands. From afar, you can see his cynical face contrasting her shocked expression. You don't even want to interrupt, letting him do what he feels like doing. You trust him enough to not do something stupid or say something harmful. Counting on him to stay on course, which he did, just the cold-hard truth is all that comes out of his mouth.

"What?" he asks back, eyebrows knitting together. Then it sets on his face, "Oh… Well." He shrugs nonchalantly.

"Why did you even grant her wishes? I thought you liked me."

You choked on your sandwich at his careless statement, grabbing your bottle before chugging the water inside, leaving him laughing.

"Excuse me? How did you even come up with that?" you ask. Though you act cool, your insides are trembling with fear.

"Well, because I like you, I just thought the feelings were mutual." He bites into his sandwich, looking at you with your jaw slightly dropped. "Was it not mutual?" he asks again when you didn't respond for a few minutes.

"Is this seriously how you're gonna confess to me? are you tricking me into confessing first? That's such a dick move, you know." You gulp your water again, trying to drown the nervousness.

"Well, what do you want me to do? Going down on one knee is definitely too early, right?" he asks, trying to play innocent. He puts down his sandwich, looking at you, seriously this time. "I like you," he started. "That should be enough confession, right?"

His eyes turned the shape of a crescent moon, a genuine smile on his face.

"Fine," you admit defeat, putting down your own sandwich before ripping the bands of friendzone by saying; "I like you too."

look who's posting double due to technical error:/

[whyse7vn]

BREAKING POINT -

[ ot7 x reader ]

this is like super short pls forgive me tan twitter tl for context

tan on twitter!!!

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

tae: yoongi pls unblock me on twitter

yoongi: kill yourself

tae: i tried guys why doesn’t he love me 💔

y/n: that was a pathetic try

tae: guess what

y/n: what?

tae: ligma man..

y/n: ligma??

jimin: no way 😭

jk: baby…

namjoon: really

y/n: WHAT???

jin: i’m with her

wtf you guys on about??

hobi: this is a sad day

tae: LIGMA FUCKING BALLS BITCH

y/n: drown

jimin: ur fault tbh

hobi: real

y/n: leave me alone

jin: look you made her upset idiots

y/n: IM NOT UPSET

hobi: cheer up baby ❤️

namjoon: it’s okay tae upsets me all the time

y/n: im fine

hobi: bts song

jk: i know bts

tae: me 2

y/n: i want to stab you with a pencil

tae: watch out namjoon

namjoon: she is definitely talking to you

tae: proof?

hobi: bts?

jimin: i’m gonna bts outta you shut the fuck up

hobi: aw man :/

jk: bts?

jin: beat the shit

tae: beat MY shit

jk: woah

yoongi: he actually needs to kill himself wow

tae: @y/n u 2

y/n: LEAVE ME ALONE

jimin: she’s mad

y/n: I’M NOT MAD

jin: y/n are you still with that scoups guy?

namjoon: didn’t we just find out they we’re together like a week ago?

jk: WE DID????

jin: she moves on fast tho so idk

y/n: NO I DONT????

jimin: yoongi mingyu jk scoups mark wonho minho san all of us

there’s more hold on i’m thinking

hobi: all of us?

jk: say sike…

y/n: ARE YOU FUCKING SICK???????

jin: woah major slut alertttttt

namjoon: shut up

y/n: ONLY LIKE 4 OF THOSE NAMES ARE RIGHT

jk: what

y/n: AND IVE ONLY FUCKED 2 OF THEM SO KILL YOURSELF LEAVE ME ALONE

yoongi: she’s a grown woman

y/n: RIGHT

sorry i’m hot as fuck and pull bitches it’s not my fault

jin: u mid

y/n: ur 30

jin: ok please leave me alone i’m sorry

tae: my body count is also 2

jimin: -2

tae: ummmm?

jk: i’ve killed no one

i could of but don’t worry

namjoon: ??

hobi: fyi she did not deny being with scoups

jimin: TRUE

jk: NO

y/n: i deny it

jimin: too late we know

jin: SLUT

sorry

pls i’m sorry i didn’t mean it pls don’t be mean to me

please oh my god i’m sorry it slipped out

love u

please

y/n: THIS IS NOT FEMINISM

namjoon: it’s okay if ur with him

jk: NO ITS NOT STOP SAYING THAT WHATS UR FUCKING ISSUE STUPID STUPID STUPID

y/n: IM NOT

tae: who have you fucked

yoongi: are you stupid?

tae: no i’m curious

hobi: OH IM CURIOUS YEAH

wow i love shinee

y/n can you please start talking to minho again and then get married to him so i can be at his wedding and we can be forever connected

jk: SHUT UR MOUTH

y/n: you guys know so much about my relationship life it actually makes me want to throw up

jimin: ur easy to stalk

hobi: she’s fucked jk and yoongi

tae: and me

jin: in dreams doesn’t count

yoongi: lol

tae: LOL AWAY FROM ME YOU NASTY BITCH

U THINK UR WINNING BUT UR FUCKING NOT

WHEN ME AND Y/N GET MARRIED IT WILL BE ME KIM TAEHYUNG WHO LOLS IN UR FUCKING FACE

YOU RAT

yoongi: L

tae: no

yoongi: O

tae: YOU FUCKING STOP RIGJT NOW MIN YOONGI

yoongi: L

tae: 6pm seoul south korea apartment block C floor 7 door number 279 a ak47 a man a mask and a fucking dream

namjoon: wow ok that’s great!!

nice vogue shoot btw jungkook!

jk: I WILL NOT FUCK U GO AWAY

namjoon: oh my fucking god

hobi: scottish pride!!

jimin: ???

hobi: was he not wearing a kilt?

jimin: a what?

hobi: killing myself

jin: why they put you in that dirty ass bathroom omg?

tae: dirty shoot for a dirty man

jin: ?

tae: what?

jin: just a bit crazy coming from u

y/n: tae you need to shower

tae: you in love

ha

fucking bitch

jin: do you fuck her or fight her damn?

jimin: right he’s pissing me off

tae: can you leave me alone i’m going through a lot rn

jk: dick

tae: ??

jk: a lot of dick

yoongi: lmao

namjoon: he likes men?

hobi: ewwwwwwwwwwww

jimin: homophobia?????????

jk: yes so he’s going through them

cuz he does not like y/n

yoongi: you say this like every 2 weeks

jk: because it is true

y/n: thank god

jk: no thank men

hobi: thx men

jin: so it’s not jimin?

jimin: what??

tae: i’ve never touched another man let alone sleep with one

hobi: amen

y/n: now that is just not true

namjoon: who cares

tae: I DO

hobi: no one will ever say those words to you

jin: i will

tae: fr 🥲?

jin: LOL

tae: ok kys

and fuck that bitch y/n

yoongi: have

tae left “tan on twitter”

hobi: cuteness overload ^_^

y/n: what crawled up his ass today tf

jk: hi do you need me do you want me do you love me

namjoon: can we just talk about life or like

jin: let me guess trees?

jimin: weed?

jk: OH MY GOD NAMJOON WANTS TO TALK ABOUT WEED

hobi: life is a downward spiral noting matters we are all slowly dying the government hates us money is worthless drugs are all around our water is running out

jk: where is it running out of

let’s catch it

y/n: tae was being super weird right?

hobi: super shy

namjoom: what’s new

hobi: new hair

namjoon: stop

hobi: forgive me master

namjoon: i’m at my breaking point

jimin: breaking bad

jin: drugs?

jimin: it all links back to namjoon…

jk: omgggggg namjoon is this true……..

namjoon: LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE

—-

pls lmk if you like the twitter concept idk if i’m feeling her yet but if you guys are i will do more idk trying to be different 🙈

[ham1lton]

wait i have a nepo baby headcanon not a political one but more succession style. nepo baby!yn whose family owns the company that owns formula 1 (like bernie ecclestone but like not a terrible racist obvi) (or liberty media but obviously something else IDK)

so she’s been around it forever and she’s grown to have a reckless party girl image (partying with kendall jenner, lily rose depp, drug allegations you get it) but she’s actually v smart and on the board of f1 and is key in making decisions

she didn’t really start making decisions until her 20s when her family made her clean up her act and the dilfs are like wow i haven’t seen you in forever. last time i saw you you were sneaking out of a corporate dinner at your parents’ house 😉

and the current grid is like terrified of her. scared but turned on

(if you don’t like the dads best friend/age gap/‘known the reader since she was young but now she’s grown up and hot’ trope then you can change it to they know who she is but never interacted until she was like. 24 lol)

but since you said you were watching gilmore girls i do imagine a scene from that show but where there’s an F1 gathering at her parents’ house but she doesn’t know cos she doesn’t live there anymore but she does to her old room and finds like 3 drivers in there bc they’re pissed off at something happening downstairs. she opens the door and says can i come in? and the drivers are like well. it’s your room. (like in the episode rory’s birthday parties hahahah)

sorry this is so long LMAO 💘

WAIT THIS IS ACTUALLY SO FUN.

if i was to write it, i’d probably change the idea that she is publicly helping to run it because i don’t think that’s realistic. but maybe her dad or something is like ‘i want to do (insert idea)’ and yn overhears it while drinking a cocktail at 10am (because it’s six pm somewhere) and she’s like ‘shit idea, do (insert better idea)’ and the dad is like ‘no, as if i’m listening to my problematic ass daughter’. so he tells his advisors like ‘lmfaooo dumb idea right’ but they’re like ‘that actually works sm better. the original idea was your daughter’s one… right?’ and the dad is like ‘oh… yes!! lol!! exactly 😅’

idk why but logan comes to my head and he’s at yn’s family estate or something for a f1 related night and he’s like … fuck i need to hide somewhere for some fresh air and time alone. so he runs into a room and shuts the door behind him. he’s like phew!!! alone at last. only to hear a lighter switch and he sees reader in her room maybe smoking? maybe lighting something on fire to do it.

and he’s like … um who tf are you?? and she’s like ‘this is my room 🤨 who the fuck are you???’ and he’s like ‘um no it’s not. there are only two people who here. (yn’s dad’s name) and his daughter but she’s at boarding school’ and she’s like ‘by boarding school, they meant rehab and i’m back. i’ve been back for a while. i’m just not showing my face downstairs. i think dad’s relieved honestly.’ and then they start to chat - maybe about expectations placed on them by themselves and others? idk why i’m thinking this scenario. can be romantic or platonic up 2 you.

but i definitely think the dilfs knowing her growing up might be slightly weird for some readers so maybe, she’s just been sent from place to place for wild behaviour so they know she exists but they’ve never seen her - like u said!!

[bloodreddemons]

All Hazbin Hotel Fashion Ranked w/Roasting | (imo)

(Pilot to Present)

#20 Valentino | He literally looks like he smells of alcohol, smoke, and piss. How tf has Velvette not fixed him yet?!?! This gawdy wannabe gimp getup is NOT OK... He just strolls around naked under that Santa Claus/Zebra printed Nightmare....🤡 (I like his glasses tho imma rob him)

#19 Adam | Dude be fucking having that moo moo dress ON. I find it hilarious that his army is dripped out more than he is. I mean his final battle moo moo dress was a bit better than the original but he really just walks around like a certain Ice King from one of my fav Cartoon Network shows lmfaooooo. ✝️

#18 Carmilla Carmine | Lackluster. I wasn't really wowed by either two of her looks all that much I guess. There's just absolutely no color I kinda wish they incorporated maybe more purple or something in her. Carmilla also got some BIG ass hands. Idk her design just kinda throws me off. It reminds me of something abstract.

#17 Vox | I really like his coat and just the overall palette of that electric blue situation but his shirt low-key is giving me Freddy Krueger tease lol. As well as Pyrocynical and that dude from the show "Villainous". I hope in Season 2 Vox serves us more looks and variety. He's not bad, he just obviously doesn't compare to others.

#16 Katie Killjoy | She got only like one outfit but man does it EAT. A bit cliche for a reporter but it's just still too cunty to turn down. The pearls, the cut, the makeup, fucking slay I guess. Miss Bryce Tankthrust still serving in hell is a MUST. 📣

#15 Lute | Ngl I was just shocked how pretty Lute was. That fucking face card and you hide it under a MASK?!?! Her eyelashes/eyes and that bob is just chef's *kiss* honestly and I actually really do think the angel uniforms are pretty hot as well. You just can't go wrong with a thigh high BOOT. Girls really get it done. 💯 (Keep the mask OFF!!!)

#14 Mimzy | I hate Mimzy with a passion but I can't deny flapper dresses are beautiful. Mimzy you absolutely devoured and the body is bodying Cheers, you're timeless lol. 🥂

#13 Husk | Please don't hate me guys. I love Husk and all, but ever since Alastor stole his soul he also stole his swag. Man's hasn't worn a fucking shirt since that day lmao. 🤣🤣 Like where DID his suit go??? I would be depressed and wasted too if I was him. I don't hate his design or outfit, I just think it's a bit too simple compared to the other main characters. His personality and Keith David 100% make up for it tho. ♠️

#12 Rosie | Just like Mimzy but like, tripled lmao. Just timeless beauty that never dies. Mary Poppins WHO???? My favorite is honestly probably her hat, that thing is like the crown jewel. Color palette is also kinda satisfying, I stan the pink and mauve. 🌷

#11 Emily | She's like a breath of fresh air from all the red and pink tones. The baby and periwinkle blue is so beautiful and so are her features. Them big ass eyes, the freckles, & whimsical hair. I liked her dress too. Big W's for Em. 💙

#10 Niffty | Cutieeeee. I really like her redesign compared to the old one. 1950's style of fashion is also still very appealing to me as well. The pink dress she was wearing was so fucking adorable I almost had a stroke just to see it in person. She's also weirdly gorgeous covered in angel blood. 💄

#9 Charlie Morningstar | Ngl...a lil disappointed in our girl. As the main character....to have so many just similar looking outfits with not much variety is kinda the most unsatisfying thing ever. It often feels like her fanart and photos that we rarely ever see contain better outfits than the ones that repeatedly appear in the show. However there's nothing really wrong with her final design I just sometimes really miss the old one from the pilot. I think her rounder features and the lighter pink suited her better. Final battle outfit was her best look so far tho in my opinion. 💋

#8 Sir Pentious | Sir Pentious style sorta never changed, he's still rocking that snake do-rag and that suit top that's striped just like everybody else's. 😮‍💨 I really wish they would've made Pentious' suit a floral pattern. I know stripes might have been popular in the 1800s but floral was very popular too and it'd be something different that'd still completely match his Era. I love his steam punk style and his other creative looks but his HEAVEN outfit was just the best. Saint Pentious > Sinner Pentious!! 🤍

#7 Velvette | Thank LUCI they changed and upgraded this girl bro. She was lowkey a hot fucking mess in my opinion before. Man did she come out SWINGING. Not just with looks but also personality I was floored. She's literally the Queen of hairdos and assembling, not many people can pull off that many patterns. Unique and trendy with the energy to back it up. Velvette you'll always be famous!! ❤

#6 Lucifer Morningstar | 6.6.6!!! Very few outfits but I never seen a moment where this man did not serve!! He's always got that fire ass coat on and he gives you the hatsssss. They're stylish while also telling you exactly who he is. It's like regal as fuck while also kinda simple. You don't have to think too much while ogling to just know that he's a dapper ass cHaD. ❤️‍🔥🍎

#5 Cherri Bomb | Loved all of Cherri's outfits. She fucking devoured and blown away over half the competition. She is Kesha vibes. Mama is Avril Lavigne vibesss. She just gives it to you with her punk rock, y2k, fashion. (I know she's supposed to 80s Era but still lol..) Always loved her base look but the final battle outfit and the one from the addict music video were amazing. 🍒

#4 Vaggie | Vaggie the fucking queen you areeee. Talk about versatility. She can really pull off a lot. I noticed that she experiments with her hair a lot like Velvette and I LOVE THAT. The fucking bob?!? High ponytail?!?! Great bangs and great length?!?! Vaggie teach me your wayssss. I always liked her bow and a lot of her outfits. Most of them are sexy without trying too hard. I don't think I can even pick a favorite but I'd probably go with final battle outfit and also her angel gown because that is just too cute lol. 💅🏼

#3 Alastor | As soon as Alastor popped up on scene he was fucking slaying. Literally definition of "pink is cute but red is sexy". He got those sharp ass acrylics ON and his coat is fabulousy spooky lmfao. He also went from being bed bug red to....even more red and sharper (because that was some how possible) lol. Red and black is always an amazing combo and his deer-like appearance is kinda appealing even tho it's a demon lol. I'd venture to even say he's probably the most fashionable Overlord. He's just eye catching and has that AURA. Maybe it's because he's an ancient relic with very peculiar cLaSs but it's really working for him. Keep going you psycho I will see you in hell lmao. (Johnny Depp's Willy Wonka called 🍓💀)

#2 Angel Dust | FUCKING KING SHIT. He just serves every time without fail. He has a whole wardrobe and they all fucking bang. The clothes are sexy, the makeup is sexy, the AURA is sexy. AND IT SHOULDN'T BE TRIFLED WITH!!! It's really sad because he spends so much time to "get pretty" for pieces of shit, but it doesn't take away Angel's talent to pull of so many gorgeous and hot things. Angel will always be a standout icon and I bet Heaven will look SO good on him. 💗

#1 Lilith (Probably lol) | We barely seen her, but I just KNOW she'd devour. Point. Blank. Period. lmfao. 👑♀️

[weebsinstash]

Omega Reader being one of the only if not THE only Omega in an entire Spider Society of Alphas and Betas 😩❤️

Alpha F! Reader in a Spider Society where you're the only female Alpha and Miguel is Having Confusing Feelings because oh shit you can get him Pregnant Pregnant? Like you're packing? Hmmm.... 😳

Reader who is a normal human and doesn't understand or is maybe like "curiosity killed the cat" about "oh wow Miguel can purr and growl? What else can he do 😳" and you're totally unaware he can like, TELL when you're ovulating and you cant even tell when he or anyone else scents you (imagine hobie scenting you to piss miguel off lmao) 💦

Reader who is one of the very few Omega in a Spider Society of normal people but your pheromones actually still affect everyone lol so like yeah some people are yandere already and others are like "you know i dont know what it is but Reader is looking real submissive and breedable and im usually not even into that shit" 😏

Reader being a "late bloomer" where you thought you were like, a normie who didnt present, and you're suddenly struggling to function because all these people you've been bonding with suddenly all have special smells that make your knees wobble sometimes and occasionally your boss gets a little bit of a growl in his voice and you're suddenly thinking, "could I fuck him raw and just take plan b. I really want an extra large super sized buffet style creampie from this man" (and also angst/possessiveness because maybe you're really upset and want to go back to "being the old normal you" and you start avoiding people who mysteriously want to spend more time with you now more than ever, and I'm also a sucker for 'new Omega wants actual surgery or drugs to not be an Omega anymore even if it's blackmarket shit that could kill them') 🙏

I'm also a fan of like. "You burned me or deserted me or I quit the group we were in together because of how you treated me and after some time has passed now that you want me back I'm actually a single mom now and here's my cute adorable little baby that I won't let you even sniff at even though the dad isn't even in the picture"

Like I'm not a parent obviously but there's some real visceral horror in the concept of like being pregnant and you're surrounded by people like unreasonably obsessed with the fact you're pregnant, like to an extremely nosey controlling "all but hijack your life" degree. You put your baby down for a nap and go to check on then 5 minutes later and they're FUCKING GONE and you start absolutely losing your mind and its like "oh no it's fine, Peter B just felt entitled to break into your place because he wanted Mayday to meet her new sibling and spend time with their Uncle Peter"

Reader is in their home dimension maybe even refusing to be a Spider anymore and you've STILL got people CONSTANTLY literally warping to your location and robbing you of any and all privacy. You get woken up in the middle of the night by your baby crying and suddenly abruptly it stops and you turn around PANICKED and. There's Miguel bottle feeding them "because you've been so tired, let me help you 🥰" and you're freaking out because, one, Miguel what are you doing in my bedroom, and two, is he giving your baby fucking formula instead of your milk without your consent. Like. They're constantly touching your kid and borderline kidnapping them and they're just like "oh my gosh look how flustered you are, what a good protective mom 🥰" meanwhile you're contemplating actual fucking murder

[lemon-natalia]

Harrow the Ninth Reaction - Chapter 52

Augustine & Mercy are having a very intense convo about how they just murdered GOD and are dooming themselves, and Gideon 1.0, Gideon 2: Electric Boogaloo, and Ianthe are just … standing there

oh shit and Dominicus is gonna die and become a black hole? i mean given there’s a whole other book not sure where this is gonna go, maybe he was lying to everyone about that as well?

when Ianthe of all people is the one advocating to try and save people out of the goodness of her heart, you know you’re fucked

‘Well, Augustine, there’s something you should know’ could someone please say something in this series that isn’t ridiculously cryptic. also i totally forgot this guy was wearing Gid’s sunglasses the whole time lol

OH WAIT THE BITCH IS BACK. i knew it was too good to be true 

also YIKES poor Mercy, she was not my favourite character but god she did not deserve that

also ah. hm. the above comment did not age well

oh this guys whole persona has just shifted. He’s still got that kinda irreverent jokiness & affability but he’s also evidently very pissed off, a lot less ‘lets have tea’ and more ‘do what i say or get fucked’

'then he looked at us, gave a crooked half smile’ ohhhh he has the same. fucking. crooked smile. that Gideon has in the BARI-star dream what the fuck

and he WAS the one who ordered Gideon-Part-1 to kill Harrow, for fucks sake. at least Harrow had Ortus be nice to her briefly cuz she’s three for three on her other parental figures trying to kill her at some point 

Gideon found out her bio dad is GOD, saw him die, saw him come back to live naked, and now found out he tried to kill her (kinda maybe its complicated) girlfriend. thats just ... so many different levels of traumatising

also i keep forgetting Gideon is literally looking like Harrow for all of this

GIDEON 1.0 ISN’T GIDEON, ITS PYRRHA DVE HIS CAV?!?!? yknow what so much else is going on rn i barely have the capacity to process that

and she was also sleeping with Commander Wake, was everyone just fucking eachother????? and i thought the love quadrangle in the last book was complicated. i’m guessing she shot Wake to stop her from potentially revealing the whole ‘i’m actually alive’ thing to the Emperor then?

also wow there’s a lot of consent issues being raised in the last couple chapters and this one, not just with dios apate major, but also like … you’re having sex with someone while possessing someone else’s body without their knowledge, but also also its the only body you have because they (presumably) killed you to absorb your soul. like what.

the drama and vast existential horror of this scene is only mildly undercut by the fact that the Emperor is having this crazy fight wearing only what is essentially an opalescent bathrobe

also why are there fucking TEETH at the bottom of the River? and Tongues?? and it thinks he’s a Resurrection Beast? i feel like there’s so much more to the River that we haven’t uncovered yet

and Augustine wasn’t wrong with what he said wayy before, the Emperor really did grant him more leniency than he did Mercy, at least he gave him a chance before murdering him

also cmon Ianthe you’re really gonna save that guy, really?

'Hands pressed. We died’ AGAIN?? i mean at least this time there’s a chance for her to come back given she’s done it once before?? also i do not know what to make of her seeing Alecto before she dies at all

[hyunsvngs]

No cus let’s talk about jeongin pregnant sex cus, like Chan has a breeding kink, and so that goes hand in hand but jeongin being so so nervous about it that he avoids it for weeks to maybe even full months?? of y/ns pregnancy until she’s pregnant pissed and HORNY. She’d have to fight him into it and show off just how pissy she can get until he has to fuck her just to shut her up. It’d scratch an itch in his brain that’s equal parts service sub and brat tamer dom, maybe it just depends on when she finally catches him

But particularly imagining a subby jeongin for this (because when am I not thinking about subby jeongin?) like imagining him basically spooning you during sex and nuzzling his face into your neck with a hand on the belly and it’s just blowing his mind that someone like you would let him do that and wow he actually did that, and wow he’s being so good taking care of your (mommy’s) needs,, give him extra praise and his confidence goes through the roof, mirrored in his pace lol

Or leaning more into y/n being pissed, degrade him until he’s crying and apologizing, “sorry for making mommy wait so long… didn’t wanna hurt you,, m’so so sorry”

Either way he’s SHOCKED at just how into this he is, for the next few days he pops a boner whenever he gets a good look or feel of the belly, all blushy and shy because wow how creepy is he? But at the same time he feels so proud because that’s his love that’s making you look like that,,

,,ANYWAY,,,,

-1%

IM REALLY SORRY THIS HAS BEEN ROTTING IN MY INBOX WHILE IVE BEEN KNOCKING ON DEATHS DOOR BUT ITS REALLY FUCKING HOT ANDNI NEE D TO POST IT IM SORRY I HAVE NOTHING TO Add

[evilkitten3]

Mutual, I'm lowkey obsessing over your tags about akatsuki Tsunade, can you elaborate more the basic timeline? Like how this would affect Tsunade's arc in classic and such

tbh i hadn't really thought about it lol

but.... let's say it happens during the search for tsunade arc? orochimaru and jiraiya are both gunning to get her on their side but you know what? the shark man said please. get your shit shizune we're going with these guys if you poison the little red-eyed shit on the way no judgement (kisame: maybe don't though?)

jiraiya is pissed, orochimaru is torn between being amused bc wow and being in agonizing pain bc his arms still don't work, naruto keeps trying to get her to come heal lee (and now sasuke) but she's having none of it so she just throws a file of miscellaneous notes at his head and tells him "find someone with good chakra control and pray" (sakura: omg i have good chakra control!!!!)

weirdly the member of team seven affected most by this is sasuke bc sakura has absolutely no fucking clue what she's doing at first and it takes her like an extra month to wake him up, so he needs to get back on his feet before he can decide if he wants to run off to orochimaru or not. lee is.... kinda sol, frankly. sakura works really really hard to help him out, and she's eventually able to get him to a place where he can do a few things, but by the time she's good enough to really be able to help him it's way too late. fortunately he's adapted somewhat, and being lee he's surpassed what anyone thought he'd be able to, but he's never going to be what he could've been. gaara feels terrible about this ofc but lee isn't the sort to really hold a grudge, even if pretty much everyone agrees he'd be perfectly justified in doing so. gai never forgives tsunade, though, not really.

concerning tsunade's role in the akatsuki.... the thing is, it's her own grandparents who started the whole jinchuuriki mess. and she's seen with her own two eyes what konoha did to places like amegakure; she was part of it. she doesn't like that the jinchuuriki die post extraction, so she starts looking into how to make that not happen, but if she does succeed, it isn't until after the gaara debacle, so chiyo still dies. her biggest motivation here is naruto - she doesn't agree with him, but he reminds her of nawaki, so she really doesn't want him to die if at all avoidable. she doesn't get too involved in the actual jinchuuriki capturing process tho; she's more useful patching people up after.

having said that, she doesn't fully agree with pain and konan's plan, she just can't really think of anything better. tobi tells sasuke about itachi while tsunade is patching him up, and since it's her family that led to this, she's pretty on-board with the whole "fuck this stupid baka village" thing (ofc she's been heading down that path since joining the akatsuki, so this isn't like canon!tsunade suddenly making this call; there's a couple years of character development first), so.... she's effectively on team sasuke at this point, and once he splits from the akatsuki she does as well.

iirc, post danzou, sasuke spent about eight and a half volumes just kinda adjusting mostly offscreen to his recent ert (eyeball replacement therapy), before skewering og white zetsu and fucking off to go accidentally reunite with zombitachi, but aside from decking itachi through a few trees on sight, idk how much about all that would change. immediately after, when sasuke brings back orochimaru, they have an awkward reunion, followed by yet another awkward reunion when orochimaru brings back the four dead hokage. she's both very happy to see her granddad again, but it's hard for her to tell him (and hiruzen, for that matter) that she deserted the village completely, even if she doesn't regret her decision.

now you may be wondering: weren't shizune and tonton also around? yes! but when sasuke went after danzou, they stayed behind, leading to shizune finding and managing to save konan after tobito killed her. there's a potential romance subplot there as well but i accidentally ruined it for myself by saying aloud "two girls one pig" and then regretting my whole life.

the other survival is jiraiya; he becomes hokage instead since it's either one of the sannin or one of the elders, and as much as he doesn't want the job, he really doesn't want them to have it. this in part means he can't go spying in ame himself, although he very nearly does after orochimaru's death gets reported, but instead he sends someone else. that person dies, but manages to get the information back to him (it has to be someone important to naruto, and it can't be kakashi, so maybe iruka? but idk how he'd be in espionage. maybe one of naruto's classmates did spy training offscreen? it's entirely possible with jiraiya as hokage instead of tsunade but idk). since jiraiya isn't a healer, he'd either need to be injured badly enough for danzou to be able to step in without him being able to object, or sasuke would just need to have his fight with danzou somewhere else (so the raikage's arm might survive also).

the final thing is that, unlike in canon, this version of tsunade never got naruto therapy'd, so while she does eventually get over the hemophilia somehow (maybe just existing in the relative vicinity of hidan did the trick), she never really dealt with the grief that caused her to leave konoha in the first place, so that's still very much there. however, i think maybe this could work to the story's advantage - instead of just naruto vs sasuke, it could be naruto and sakura vs sasuke and tsunade. tho in this instance sasuke really isn't alone, and isn't really trying to be by that point. it's more a battle of "do we try to fix the system from within, or do we really need to start from scratch for things to improve in any meaningful way", but ultimately the winner is the realization that four people from konoha not only shouldn't but honestly can't be the only ones making this call. if the world is going to move forward, it can't be dragged by a single person, or even two people. it's gotta be a group effort. idk if the story should go into the details of what they decide on, bc i'm definitely not politically savvy enough for something like that, or just have an open ending leaving whatever happens next up to interpretation.

(sorry this took so long lol i kept having to do things XD)

[silvyslayer42]

how i think some character’s thoughts react to seeing kuriko:

toritsuka : immediately attracted to her and only a little bit because she looks like saiki

‘wow. that chicks kinda cute, huh? she looks around my age, too. maybe i should- actually, no that would probably go badly. … oh fuck? she’s looking over here. we’re making eye contact. her eyes are so pretty- and her expression is so scary oh my god??? what kind of spiritual aura even is that? it’s like she’s staring into my soul… did i piss her off somehow? you know what, i’ll leave, i’m just gonna get out of here. that girl is pretty cute but totally terrifying…’

aiura : immediately clocked her as saiki lol.

‘heh? isn’t this kusuo’s aura? so he’s here in the same place as me then (fate? yeah, definitely fate), but where..? oh, there he is! . eh? is that-? why does he look like a girl now? … so even kusuo has that kind of hobby… you look great by the way, babe!’

kokomi : gay

‘ah, this is a surprise! that is kuriko-chan, isn’t it? that means she’s back in japan now, then? i should probably go say hi to her, she was lovely to meet back at the cafe after all, and a perfect girl always greets her friends and acquaintances with a smile~! speaking of lovely… kuriko chan does look just as charming as ever. that constantly aloof face is really as cute on her as it is on her older brother, i could almost offu for her myself, haha. im getting sidetracked, anyways. … what exactly should i say to her? would just “hello” suffice? maybe a more substantial greeting would be better?—‘

akechi : gay

‘hmmm. well, objectively speaking that girl is quite pretty isn’t she? for starters her hair is a very nice shade of pink and it looks so nicely styled too while still managing the “effortless” look well enough that if i didn’t know better about hair styling i’d say she didn’t do anything special to it at all and her eyes are such a deep shade of violet too and they really remind me of saiki-kun’s in that way. speaking of saiki-kun he and this girl do look sort of similar now that i put my attention on it. maybe it’s because i have seen saiki-kun’s eyes before too even if it was only for a moment and know that they’re a similar color or maybe it’s just that perpetual pout that they both wear.. regardless this girl is really very attractive, i guess if i did have a type it would be girls like her with defined jaws and soft looking skin however this is all immaterial considering i can only really have eyes for—‘

[19burstraat]

anyone want to hear my six of crows x jane austen's emma au. yes of course you do don't be silly. the only person allowed to be silly is me as I descend into madness in the course of trying to cast this. (if you think 'I've heard this before' yes I've posted abt it before tho I think it was on my main)

kaz is emma, a bored, overintelligent rich bitch stuck in a country house with a bunch of shit idiot neighbours and almost no one to entertain or match him. fucking useless dad per haskell / mr woodhouse is a weaksauce hypochrondriac, and jordie / isabella has gone and got married and ditched kaz, the bastard. the only consolation is their neighbour inej / mr knightley, who is rich, sensible, popular, and elegible as hell... glory be, an intellectual equal for kaz!

in order to be less bored, kaz takes on a protege, mysterious randomer and natural son wylan / harriet smith, who kaz decides to mould in his own image and make a good match for. wylan is in love with gentleman farmer jesper / robert martin, but kaz is a snob and tries to push him towards local vicar kuwei / mr elton (I KNOW. I'M SORRY KUWEI), but that all goes tits up bc turns out kaz is a fucking terrible matchmaker, who'd've known.

meanwhile, unassuming and a little cold, but locally well-liked matthias / jane fairfax has arrived back in the village, and kaz busily commences hating on him because he's another accomplished young man and he makes him feel inadequate. hot on his heels comes the mysterious nina / frank churchill (NINA I'M SO SORRY I FUCKING HATE FRANK BUT THIS IS WHAT WORKS FOR THE COUPLES YOU CAN BE A NICE FRANK CHURCHILL ): ), who kaz is kind of fascinated by and enjoys sparring with, and hence kind of misses the really obvious signs that nina and matthias are secretly engaged, even though inej, ever thief of secrets, has lowkey noticed something's up, like matthias getting mysterious gifts from someone. kaz ends up being convinced that possibly it's inej that's pursuing matthias, which nina encourages because it helps her cover, and kaz kinda panics.

everyone has petty village drama which culiminates when kaz sneers at pekka rollins / miss bates (LISTEN. LI actually you don't need to listen bc I laughed out loud when I thought of this comparison but hear me out, if you just think of it as the equivalent of the church of barter scene except instead of 'I buried him' it's 'when have you ever stopped at three?' it kind of works. sorry to miss bates tho who is still kinda my fave austen character) at box hill, which culminates in inej going BOY WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM and kaz is like wow she kind of has a point should I be a better person :/

uhh what else even happens. there's a ball after nina massively encourages one, inej saves wylan from being partnerless and later dances with kaz (think of the gloveless dance scene from the 2020 adaptation? yeah? yeahh??). the regency gender conventions here are getting so messed up lmao, never mind. in emma harriet fancies herself in love with mr knightley and emma is forced to realise that she likes him, so let's say that wylan pretends to be after inej, in order to strong arm kaz into realising that he's wanted to marry inej this entire time. wylan's dad turns out to be minted (I'm stretching the book here to make it work w SOC but never mind) but that's after kaz has admitted he fucked up and sent wylan off to marry gentleman farmer jesper, yaaay. nina's relatives who are stopping her from marrying matthias die and hence there's a massive revelation with 'oh they were engaged this whole time lol', kaz is PISSED bc he didn't clock it. uh. everyone gets married and now kaz can escape the shit village and actually go places. the end.