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tsukimefuku · 1 year ago

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The man who played with fire

After some drinks by yourself and getting frustrated with someone, you stupidly knock on Higuruma's door to test a theory.

To vibe: Misery - Maroon 5

Tags: +18 (!!!), WITH PLOT (there is always a plot), Jujutsu Kaisen, SMUT, f!reader, Higuruma x reader, some alcohol consumption, he's so in love, she's so clueless, reader is being kind of an asshole, oral sex, cunt-locking, penetration, light f!top x m!bottom dynamic, involves some love-triangle classic shenanigans.

WC: 3.4K

Hey, this is actually my first smut piece! Hope you guys enjoy my filth. This is part of my "Jujutsu Partners Canon Divergence AU", a sequence of short stories and random drabbles for a Nanami x f!reader x Higuruma fanfic I'll eventually write (eventually). This is preceded specially by "Kindness and Sunflowers", link here. To see the ever-growing list of one-shots, please visit my masterlist :)

Disclaimer: they’re NOT written and posted in chronological order of events. To see where this story fits in the timeline, please check the masterlist mentioned above.

Fair warning: I like writing characters being humanely assholes and clueless idiots. Be warned.

"I can't believe this," you muttered to yourself. You were drinking alone at the bar, and the darkness served to hide your blushed-by-fury face. After what you called The Event, Nanami asked to talk, only to end up lecturing you about the shortcomings of a jujutsu sorcerer's life. As if you didn't know, given all the losses you had experienced over the years, precisely due to Tengen's established Jujutsu Society. "He can't be serious, lecturing me about this shit." Still talking to yourself, like a crazy person, you tried to let your anger go down with five cold pints of beer. It was definitely not working.

Your phone rang, and Nanami's name lit up on your screen, much to your annoyance. You immediately refused the call and flipped the phone down on the table, feeling all your rage bubbling up from the darkest depths of hell. You needed a release, any kind of release — an exorcism, most likely.

Or, you could try something else.

Peering around the bar, you started looking for someone that you could consider even remotely interesting — but no one, nothing, nada. Given this was a Tuesday night, there were only you and some monotonous people scattered around the murky lighting, encompassed by the noise of a few clicking glasses.

That was when your phone started to rumble to the sound of some text messages, and you grabbed it ready to pitch the phone across the vicinity, believing it was Nanami again. But, much to your surprise, it was actually Higuruma texting you. You were so angry that you had completely forgotten to talk to him today.

He was basically asking how you were, given that you hadn't texted back since yesterday, and you were both chatting on a daily basis for weeks by this point.

That was when you had a greatly horrible (or horribly great?) idea. After all, how could a decision made under the influence, at night, while angry at someone you knew you had feelings for, be bad? This is fine.

"Are you busy right now?" You sent him, feeling the beer breeze warmly through your nostrils every time you exhaled. You have a crush on him, but that's it, this is fine. And oh, you did. Ever since you dropped him off in his apartment the night he was freed from Jujutsu High's headquarters, you knew that there was definitely something stirring up — at least from your end. Higuruma was drunk, he didn't make a move, and could just have been kind of clingy, to be honest, so you decided to let it go for the time being. Every time you got a little too excited to meet or talk to him recently, you reminded yourself very sternly you weren't a schoolgirl.

But you wouldn't let it go today, because today, you really wanted to know.

"Nothing, really. I just got home." Higuruma promptly answered.

"Can I come over?" You texted back, and locked your screen right after, instantly anxious and eager at the same time. What the fuck is wrong with me? What am I thinking? What am I doing? This can't be a good ide-

"Of course, I'd be delighted." He replied. "And then you could actually see the sunflower is doing very well, in spite of me."

You left the money on the counter and ran off, shushing your thoughts out loud.

***

This was a terrible idea, but I think I can just hang out for an hour, make small talk and then leave, you started to negotiate mentally with yourself right after the three knocks on the door gave some sanity back to your brain.

However, after Higuruma opened the door and cocked his head to lean it against the door frame, you knew you were completely doomed. He had the top of his white shirt unbuttoned, his tie was hanging loosely around his neck, and his sleeves were rolled up enough for you to see his beautifully defined forearms. His hair had the perfect messy-I-just-got-home look to it, and you instantly wanted to drive your hands through his pitch black locks.

Oh shit, you thought to yourself, feeling something stir up in your body — and it surely wasn't anger.

It must have been a moment, because he started to look a little puzzled. "Hey, come in." Higuruma said, as if he was repeating himself. Did you not hear him the first time he invited you in?

"Of course. Thank you." You replied, looking down and hushing yourself inside his apartment. You could feel your face burning, and imagined how much of an idiot you were being right now for ever believing this could go anything but wrong.

"Are you okay? You seem out of sorts." He pointed out, closing the door behind him. "Can I get you anything? I got some beer from the convenience store, and there might be water somewhere in the kitchen."

"I'm fine, I just ran here to get some cardio." You clumsily replied, sitting on the couch. "I came from the bar, actually. Already drank some beers. No need."

Higuruma huffed out a soft chuckle, still a little confused, but now intent on prying. "You're not helping your case. You mean to say that you, a jujutsu sorcerer that exercises heavily, decided to get some cardio done while walking under the influence, from a bar, at night, to meet me?"

"Yes. That's what I meant. Quit prying." You responded, not knowing what the hell else you could say. Tell him that you came rushing just so you wouldn't have the time for second guessing on having s- no, you wouldn't do that.

"Hm." He hummed to himself, grabbing a can and sitting beside you, bouncing the sofa slightly. "I mean, I'm always happy to have you come over, but the only time you came here was to bring me drunk from a bender. And to get me flowers."

"Get you a sunflower, because yours had died." You corrected.

"Precisely, a sunflower." Higuruma replied, taking a sip from his beer. "So, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I just wanted to see you." You said, earnestly. And deep down, it was true, if only half of it.

Higuruma immediately seemed content, even if he only had a small smile to show for it on his face. "Oh."

You were both silent for a moment.

"I never got to repay you for your kindness that day." He said, out of the blue, taking you by surprise.

"It was nothing." You said, shrugging. "I just got you home and gave you a flower."

"Oh, if I remember correctly…" He began.

"Do you remember anything?" You asked, mockingly.

He looked at you, slightly grinning, and continued. "You had to blow up my lock to bust us in. In some places, that would be considered a felony."

"You're saying I could get arrested for busting into a home while I'm with the man that lives there?"

"You also used explosives and damaged the door, let's not forget that." Higuruma said in a mix of playful and matter-of-factly.

"I couldn't ask, because you were completely wasted! Just getting your address was a pain in the ass."

He chuckled. "Was it?"

"Yes, it was." You replied, more relaxed, thanks to coming back to your old banter. This came for the both of you so naturally that you barely realized Higuruma had rested his arm on the sofa right behind you, leaning closer. "Higuruma, why did you drink so much that night?"

That question surprised him, as you could deduct from his eyes widening lightly. He put his beer can on the coffee table and ran his fingers through his hair, inhaling deeply. "I don't know. I guess-" he stuttered for a moment. "I guess I was just nervous to be out again, finally and properly going for a drink with..." his last word lingered on the air, as he unconsciously looked at your eyes, and then your lips, "with you all."

"Do you remember what you said when we got here?" You asked, shamelessly staring at his lips too.

"I believe I said, 'you are too kind'." Higuruma leaned over even further, and you felt his entire body go rigid for a second as you drifted closer to him, heat crawling all over your skin, putting your forehead to his. After some seconds, he rested the palm of his hand over your knee, and from how needy you felt for that man at that particular moment, even such a small thing was enough to make you trip over to the other side.

You immediately crushed your lips to his, putting your hands behind his head. You kissed him eagerly, letting out an extremely faint moan as you drove your fingers over his hair — he tasted like beer, his worn off cologne from the day was completely intoxicating, and you found yourself nearly lunging at the man like a starved animal. Realizing what just happened, you pulled back, starting to apologize, eyes wide and face completely flustered. "Higuruma, I'm so sor-"

Your apologies were cut short with his own lips now clashing into yours in a passionate kiss, as he pushed you under his weight to lay on the couch, his fingers interlocking in your hair strands from the back of your head. His hips effortlessly slid in between your legs as your hands made their way to brush his shoulders, and you let out another moan against his lips, this time much louder, thanks to the dry pressure of his now bulging pants against your clothed core. Higuruma groaned satisfied in response, tracing the outline of your mouth with the tip of his tongue. Your mind was becoming hazy, and he parted from your lips for a moment to gaze at your face. His eyes were locked on you, studying every feature and investigating for any sign of discomfort or second thoughts.

You caught up on that and made your way inside his slightly open mouth with your own tongue, intertwining it with his in between gasps and huffs. Now you separated just enough to breathlessly say, "Bed. Now."

You gasped against his mouth, before holding yourself throwing your arms behind his neck and locking your legs on his waist, grinding on him. He moaned loudly at this stimulation, before smiling sheepishly and putting both of his hands on the back of your thighs for support, knowing full well you meant for him to carry the both of you into the bedroom.

"Yes, ma'am." He replied, propping the both up and then lifting from the couch. Higuruma pressed open-mouthed kisses all around the nape of your neck, as he walked towards a dark room, parting his hands from you just to switch the light on. "I want to see you," he said, breathing heavily against your skin, as he threw you on the bed, climbing on top, one hand to each side of your head as he stared at you with a lustful look in his eyes. You instantly pulled his loosened tie to kiss him again, and he lost balance, basically falling with his body over yours. You whimpered at the feeling of having his now full-blown clothed erection grinding against your core, and involuntarily opened your legs to accommodate his hips over yours.

Higuruma started to take off his tie and shirt, and you followed suit, removing your top and bra. He basked on the sight of you, and cupped both of your breasts in his hands. His digits felt rough, and frictioned just the right amount against you, as he squeezed both of them, satisfied and reverent. His hands started traveling down your figure, contouring every curve, hill, and valley of your body, reaching the edge of your pants. "May I?" He asked, his face lightly blushed as he awaited your response. You nodded, and he promptly unzipped you, pulling your pants and panties down, the slight stimulation from the fabric sliding over your legs being enough to make you mewl with satisfaction. Every nerve in you was incandescent with absolute hunger for him.

You opened your legs, and he could see you were already completely wet from arousal. Letting out an audible satisfied moan, Higuruma began tracing your belly with his mouth, planting long kisses as he went down, leaving a trail of heat wherever his lips touched. As he got near your core, he kissed one last time one of your thighs, and sniffed on your folds. You smelled sinfully sweet, and he made no effort to hold back his eyes fluttering shut with pure bliss. "Could I, please?"

This was his prayer, the bed was his altar and he was determined to worship you.

Without a word, you simply grabbed the top of his hair and drove his mouth in between your legs, whimpering and mewling as his tongue started to rub against your clit. His chin would grind forward on your entrance whenever he changed the angle, and you involuntarily pushed yourself down when that happened. He noticed it, and slid his tongue inside you, eliciting a loud moan in response, with your walls clenching around it. He groaned back in appreciation, and his husky, low voice reverberated throughout your entire being. You arched your back, beginning to feel that familiar heat and fire pooling on your lower stomach.

"H-Higuruma... I-" You sighed, in between mewls and moans.

He immediately stopped and brought his face up to look at you. You let out a complaint sound, glaring at him to ask why he stopped.

"My dear, I'm literally with my face in between your legs, eating you out." He said, unfazed by your annoyance. "We're way past last names. Call me Hiromi."

Incredulous, you let out a mixture of a chuckle and a scoff, having the top inside of you wiggling its way out to the surface. You grabbed his hair strongly, and he cinched his eyebrows, cock twitching inside his pants, as the corner of his lips formed an open-mouthed smile. His eyes were softly resting on you, and he wouldn't mind if your naked, flushed body was the last thing he saw before he died.

"Shut up." You said, grinding your pussy against his mouth, and locking his head to your core with your legs tightly holding around him. Higuruma proceeded more eager than before, lapping at your clit relentlessly with his tongue, alternating with sucks that were having you seeing stars. He was absolutely pussy drunk with the heavenly taste of you and had, at this moment, relinquished any control, as he let you face fuck him chasing your release.

The heat came back again, and you closed your eyes, sinking the back of your head on a pillow. Waves were starting to form, and your orgasm hit you like the crashing water against the shore. You began to tremble and vibrate, coming hard in his mouth, and Higuruma feverishly drank you up, completely hypnotized with how amazing you tasted and felt, falling apart under his ministrations.

Letting you finish riding your high, licking gently on your overstimulated core, he waited until you were barely moving before removing his own pants and climbing his way back on top of you. As he got close enough to your face, you looked at him, completely flustered and debauched, resting the palm of your hand on his cheek. "Higuruma, I want you inside of me." His tongue, albeit magnificent, just wasn't enough, and you could feel the same anticipation and neediness coiling in your stomach again, as the tip of his cock rested on your entrance.

He looked at you and grunted, displeased. "Hiromi." Higuruma reached to the bedside table and pulled a condom. The movement had him rubbing his throbbing length, already leaking with pre-cum, right against you, forcing him to let out a strained groan.

You gasped at the sensation and chuckled at his annoyance right after, suddenly locking his hips in between your legs, rolling you both so that you would be on top of him. "We'll see, if you ask nicely." You replied, locking him in between your arms, hovering. Higuruma's eyes instantly softened, and his cheeks took a pinkish-red tint. "You're bossy." He said, turning his head towards your wrist and planting a chaste kiss on it, lingering with his lips for a moment on your skin. "I like it."

You smiled, more pleased than you'd like to admit it, because the both of you fit so well it was astonishing. You never thought it would be happening like this, and for a moment, it felt so right you wished you could be here forever. But nothing that good ever lasts long enough.

Grabbing the condom from him with one hand, you motioned the other to grab his neglected cock. As your fingers grasped around his length, Higuruma let out a satisfied and urgent moan, slowly arching himself under your touch. The sight of him completely pliable to your will had you fluttering, as you began to rub your hands up and down, pumping his girth to pleasure him. Higuruma plastered his palms over the plush of your thighs, and groaned your last name, holding out on some kind of desperation.

"'Way past last names', huh?" You scoffed, playfully, starting to slide the condom over his cock before he could hit you with any witty comeback. After, you positioned yourself above him, holding his length against your entrance, and started to slowly descend over it, feeling it thrust in you to the brim, stretching your walls as he bottomed out. You both let out a gasp, now connected, and you waited a moment to adapt and take all of him in.

"Come here." You said, pulling on his shoulder for him to sit up, so that you could feel and touch every inch of him. He obliged, and sat up, immediately driving his mouth to kiss your neck insistently, brushing the tip of his tongue on the edge of your jaw. Higuruma began to rock his hips, and you did the same, each in the opposite direction, so that his cock would slide in and out of your pussy easily.

You moaned against his scalp, and he held his hands to the small of your waist, leaning you backwards to suck on your breasts. The moment his mouth latched onto one breast, he rolled your other nipple between his fingers, eliciting loud moans and mewls from you. You had your head dangling back, as he began to thrust into you quicker and harder. He slid the hand previously on your waist to the back of your neck, and pulled you in for a kiss, taunting your mouth with his tongue. You opened it, and both your tongues intertwined, as he, now, chased his own release, panting and groaning into your lips. You weren't so far off, feeling the familiar coil tightening in your abdomen, yearning for release.

"Higu-"

"Hiromi, please. P-please... Please..." He implored and begged, kissing desperately your jawline. You lowered your gaze and met his eyes softer and more tender than you had ever seen, so urgently pleading for you to let him in, give him this inch of intimacy, and that was the moment you caved. You pressed your forehead against his, and started to cry out his name. "Hiromi... H-Hiromi..."

Letting out moans and groans in between the squelching from your juices, he pulled you impossibly close, eyes piercing and locked onto yours. This was the moment you felt more naked, bare and vulnerable the entire night, and the coil that had formed in your belly snapped, sending waves of pure pleasure from the tip of your head to your toes. Feeling your gummy walls clenching all around him, Higuruma also hit his orgasm intensely, thrusting into you fervently to ride off his high. He stopped slowly, ready to crumble underneath you at any moment.

"Hiromi-" You said, brushing your lips against his cheek, then under his ear. "Hiromi, Hiromi, Hi-ro-mi. Happy? Just for tonight, though."

Higuruma chuckled soulfully, realizing how much he absolutely loved the sound of his name on your tongue, purred through your whispered voice, reverberating on his flushed, sensitive skin. It made his body quiver and tremble with pure satisfaction.

It was right there, at that moment, with his heart fluttering while you leaned back to gaze at him, stroking his hair strands between your fingers with a gentle smile, that he realized just how fucked he actually was.

Sighing softly and smiling back, Higuruma pushed his lips against yours. He knew that by playing with fire, he was bound to get burned, eventually — and burned he was.

#jujutsu kaisen higuruma #higuruma x reader #jjk higuruma #jjk hiromi #hiromi x reader #higuruma hiromi #jjk imagines #jjk drabbles #jjk x you #higuruma smut #hiromi smut #jjk smut

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booasaur · 5 months ago

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I'm not very good at text posts, I never know where to start, it's why most of what I write are tags on gifsets and replies to asks. It helps me to have something to go off of.

Yesterday, I wrote a bit about the first day of the ceasefire in Gaza, but I left out some events in the West Bank. I saw this tweet today and I think it gives me a good starting point:

A few people in the replies asked: what about the ceasefire?

This IS Palestine under a ceasefire. This is Palestine before Oct 7th. They don't have the right to defend themselves, the peaceful status quo that creates no headlines is the steady hum of Palestinians being attacked and killed as their homes and livelihood are destroyed, kidnapped and held for possibly years on "administrative detention", which means no charge or trial.

And "It begins."? I searched Google news for "West Bank killed" and picked a random page:

To be clear, this is the West Bank, not Gaza. Hamas is only the ruling party in Gaza and ostensibly the target of Israel's "war", but that clearly hasn't protected Palestinians in the West Bank. Israel increased their attacks after October 7th and might yet escalate now, with Gaza quiet, but for those that say "there was a ceasefire on October 6th", there is this headline:

As astute observer might note the date.

To go back to current events, this happened yesterday in the West Bank:

This child was killed.

This detainee died in Israeli prison, held for months without charge:

A youth injured:

Did you hear about any of that? Did the media and world governments talk about Palestine's right to defend itself or how it can possibly live with a violent, hateful neighbor like this?

Today, day 2, back to Gaza, more aid is getting in, thankfully:

Finally! Imagine the number of young children going without candy or even fresh fruits and vegetables for so long.

Rebuilding continues:

The recovery and identification of bodies continues:

We also have Israeli forces firing on Palestinians who get near to Rafah, killing two. Yes, already on day 2 of the ceasefire in Gaza, two people (just in Gaza) dead. There's video of their deaths here, a child being shot and the man who tried to help him. Apparently instead of warning him off, they decided he was a threat:

There continue to be new attacks in the West Bank today, the ones referred to in the very first tweet. They tend to come from any combination of Israeli settlers, police, and the IDF.

Currently, the police have shot two settlers they thought were Palestinians and the whole area has now been locked down.

They've arrested many Palestinian men...for what? When will they let them go?

So ends day 2 of the ceasefire.

#palestine #free palestine #gaza #west bank #israel #us politics

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gh0stkitti · 24 days ago

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Must of Been the Wind

Note: This takes place in the Orb factory au you may not understand everything! This is also on ao3.

Master Post (still needs to be updated)

May 31: Etho

When the hermits went outside people, strangers and others would always assume Etho was cosplaying as some anime character. Which anime character? Beef wasn’t sure Xisuma had muttered something about anime and told Etho something. Great move, Watchers! Beef does wonder which watcher has watched the anime show. Not that he knew them really.

…

The little animal scurries around the house, darting in between bushes and leaves. Possibly making a mess of the garden. Wels and Beef wouldn’t be pleased about that. Outside today something was going on. White paint was being used to paint some sort of object. The little creature slowly peeks out of the push they were hiding in. their tails, moving from side to side. “A fox!” the fox flinches back from the noise. Who had yelled that?

Etho looks up at the sound of Bdubs yelling. “Huh? A fox-” he blinks and stares at the fox, “-that's a fox,”

“Well duh!” Bdubs replies, getting a bit closer. The foxes in the server would normally run away once you got close to them and it seemed this one was no expectation. The little creature scatters, using their little legs as fast as they can go. Fear had taken over and they knocked into the paint bucket full of white paint, splattering it all over themselves. “Uh oh!” Bdubs quickly gets up, “Do you need help buddy?” not like the fox could reply. What were they supposed to do?

…

“No.” Xisuma firmly says, crossing his arms, “We cannot keep the fox,” Etho gives him a sad face and Bdubs just pouts holding the now clean fox cub. “Plus” Xisuma adds, “I am pretty sure you're not allowed to a keep fox,”

“But you could keep one on the server!” Bdubs rebuttals. “And-”

He was cut off by Xisuma, who shook his head in annoyance and possibly a hint of amusement. “No, Bdubs, we already have a cat and dog who make plenty of messes for me to clean up, and,” he turns to Etho, “You're a fox hybrid aren’t you?” Etho nods. “Wouldn’t it be a little weird for us to keep a fox?”

Etho opens his mouth for a moment, not that anyone can see with the mask on, and then closes it. Trying to figure out what he wanted to say. He pauses and then finally replies. “No,’ Xisuma sighs.

“Please, the fox is a wild animal, let them back outside,” Xisuma felt like he was begging. Etho and Bdubs glance at each other, silently talking.

If Xisuma heard random clattering from Etho or Bdubs’ room it must have been the wind or something.

……..

One more little note: Thank you @hermitadaymay for doing this event! I’m really sad it’s over. It was really fun writing everyday! And I’m pretty sure it helped with my writing block that lasted for a while! And all your comments in the tags were super sweet :D thanks!

#hermitcraft fanfic #hermitcraft #hermitaday #ethoslab #bdubs #bdoubleo100 #xisumavoid #vintagebeef #ghostwrites #orb factory au

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cfv-week · 9 months ago

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We're back for the third time! Here are the how to, rules and prompts for Cardfight Vanguard Prompt Week 2024! Mark October 7th - 13th in your calendars!

How it works:

Chose a prompt that speaks to you and create something related to that theme. You can also combine several prompts if you so chose.

Post your creation on the day the prompt is assigned to, right here on tumblr.

Tag the post with #cfvweek2024

We will reblog all contributions in the tag onto this blog. Make sure to follow us so you can see them all!

If you post fanfiction to AO3, add them to the collection "CFV Prompt Week 2024".

Any and all sorts of contributions are welcome. Fanart, fanfictions, edits, moodboards, memes, playlists, headcanon posts, gifs etc.

If you end up missing the date of the prompt, don’t worry! We accept late entries as well.

Rules:

Please note that this week is specifically for the original CFV, CFV G and the V series reboot (which includes Shinemon and IF). This means no Overdress. Apologies to Overdress lovers, but it’s the former series that we want to keep alive in the present age.

We don't accept AI-generated content.

NSFW (violence, gore, M or E rated fics and such) content is allowed, but only if tagged appropriately.

You're welcome to combine your entries for this event with any other prompt events, writing or art challenges you want to participate in, such as Whumptober, Fictober, Flufftober, Omnious October etc.

Transcription of prompts under the cut:

Day 1: Favorite Minor Character | Sick Fic | Pets

Favorite Minor Character:

We Vanguard fans are SERIOUS about our side characters! Let's show some love to the fantastic characters that were given a jarring lack of content in the series! Maybe your favorite character overall is a member of the main cast, but now it's time to pick somebody from the sidelines to appreciate just as much!

Sick Fic:

What a classic we've got here today, folks. You don't necessarily have to write a fic for this (though it's totally encouraged)! Just create anything you want involving those down days. Characters getting sick in fiction can help show off so many neat and hidden traits, so be creative and make whatever you see fit (or not fit, because somebody is sick)!

Pets:

PETS! What more could you even ask for? We've got only a few pets to thrive off of in the show, so lets show some love to them… or maybe think up some original ones! Maybe somebody has a secret pet, or maybe there was a random line of dialogue about a pet at some point? Who knows what could happen, but it ought to be great.

Day 2: Favorite Team | PSYqualia | Memories

Favorite Team:

We've got SO many to choose from! And not even just the main teams like Q4 and TRY3; how about silly little teams like the iconic Miwa-Morikawa-Izaki-Emi squad? Go wild! Whether it be a competitive Vanguard playing team, or just characters that work well together, there's bound to be some really great teams to make stuff for!

PSYqualia:

Now here's something real intriguing… PSYQualia was the fictional power used to communicate with the Planet Cray and the illustrated cards that came from it, but it had drawbacks. Will you represent it in its corruptive origins, or its positive future? Go for it!

Memories:

I'm sure everyone has some kind of fond memories that came from Vanguard, or maybe you'll want to represent how memories are presented by the characters! A large amount of the series revolves around memories, surprisingly enough- Misaki's whole life is pretty much centered around them, and Seasons 2 and 4 seriously threw us for a doozy. Let's make this a day to remember!

Day 3: Favorite Outfit | Fluff | Magic AU

Favorite Outfit:

YIPPEE!!! Maybe that's a little exaggerated, but c'mon- who doesn't love a good outfit. Vanguard's got some seriously cool fits, if not just for the characters, then on the card art! Look around and find your inspiration, or maybe even create an outfit you'd think would be a fan favorite!

Fluff:

No one could ever lie and say they don't like fluff. Sweetness, love, care, and everything in-between. It can be soft, tooth-rotting, comforting! Do as you please and pick out your favorite fantasies for this one, we're sure it'll be more than appreciated.

Magic AU

Vanguard has its fair share of magical elements! But what if they got taken in slightly different way, a step to the left? Or maybe even a leap! Are they all wizardly figures? Magical girls? Maybe there's just something 'magical' in the air? Go wild, throw out a magic-based alternate universe!

Day 4: Favorite Relationship | Betrayal | Cray & Lore

Favorite Relationship:

Besties, lovers, enemies, and everything in-between, everyone loves a compelling relationship. But which one is your favorite? Are you enamored with the way some characters hate each other? Or maybe you just really want to show off your favorite ship! Pick your favorite Vanguard relationship, and if you have multiple? The more the merrier!

Betrayal:

Uh oh… There's no shortage of evil in Vanguard, and betrayal can come from anywhere. Does it coincide with the Reverse, PSYqualia, or maybe just human nature? Pick an act of betrayal or make up your own, because - no matter what, it's gonna hurt real good.

Cray and Lore:

The planet Cray is SO COOL and SO UNEXPLORED! Delve deep into the lore of the planet, or think up something fresh and cool for it! Blaster Blade and Dragonic Overlord are only the tip of this awesome iceberg, and there's endless things to explore!

Day 5: Favorite Episode | Family | Birthday

Favorite Episode:

Can you even believe there's 196 episodes JUST in the original run, and hundreds more after that? With all that Vanguard, you're bound to have some favorite episodes! Let's all skim through the runs and pick a favorite to represent, there's so so so many to enjoy!

Family:

Family comes in all shapes and sizes, and the Vanguard characters became a family over and over again, without a doubt. Choose a family in Vanguard, by blood or not, to create for, and enjoy!

Birthday:

We've got TWO BIRTHDAYS THIS WEEK! Today is Mamoru Anjou's birthday, and Kourin Tatsunagi's is on the 13th of October! Show them some extra love, or maybe pick another birthday to celebrate! We love our characters, and their birthdays, whether fictional or not, are always fun.

Day 6: Favorite Clan | Crossover | Secret Identity

Favorite Clan:

I know, I know… This might be an impossible task. But we have to try! Pick a Vanguard clan that you can call your favorite, and show it some appreciation! This can extend out to newer or old standards of clan systems, in any way you like!

Crossover:

Vanguard has endless opportunities to pair up with other series, it's all pretty open! Crossovers are ALWAYS FUN, and it's refreshing to play with other media that we also love! Maybe one of your favorite shows has Vanguard cards in it now, or maybe Vanguard characters are in the book you're reading or new anime you're watching! Who knows, have fun!

Secret Identity:

Oooh… A secret! There's already representation of this trope in Vanguard plenty of times! Remember Ninja Master M, and the Team Unknown debacle? The time Kyou was the Abominable Snowman? Maybe even make up your own, go wild! Whether it's online or behind a mask, there's plenty of ways to hide your identity. But remember- it's a secret!

Day 7: Favorite Parallel | Endings & New Beginnings | FREE

Favorite Parallel:

Contrasting motives in media is probably one of the most exciting things I could ever think of. What contrasts and parallels do you see in Vanguard? Blaster Dark and Blaster Blade, perhaps? Character arcs, episode structures, the lore of the cards and the journey of our protagonists... There's parallels everywhere. Delve deep for this one, and find something really interesting to analyze!

Endings and New Beginnings:

Vanguard has some of our absolute favorite endings and beginnings ever, so why not go ahead and show them off? The transition of each arc, each era, each generation, is something to be celebrated. May it be the end of a big tournament, or the beginning of a new season altogether, or something totally different and unexpected!

FREE!

YOU'RE FREE! Do literally anything you want for this last day of CFV Week! Doodle assisticat, make a cool edit, take a picture of your CFV merch, throw out a moodboard, write a 200k word fic (okay, maybe don't try to do that in just one day). But, whatever you choose to do, let's end this week with a bang!

We cannot wait to see what you guys come up with!

Lots of Love, the mod team

PS: Don't forget to use #cfvweek2024 so we can easily find your contributions!

Additionally, you can tag us if you’d like, to make sure we see your posts!

#cardfight!! vanguard #cfv #kai toshiki #aichi sendou

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n0tamused · 3 months ago

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Late night yap session about Jien and Jing Yuan

Contents: just a long summarized yap focused on Jing Yuan and Jien, not proof read, please do not fact check me on this I haven't revised my Xianzhou lore in a hot minute and just want to talk about her, I ship these two idc they're my comfort ship </3, this post isn't about the ship bit though dw, this does involve mentions of Proxy and all the criminal things she has done(murder, kidnapping, cannibalism)(nothing explicit),

I am still fleshing some details out, some later parts are subject to change, and I am also trying to find that nice balance between yapping and info dumping in an incoherent way, so bear with me

Words: 1907

Tags: @sh1-n0bu

SO Jing Yuan and Jien? That is the first topic I wanted to yap about today, it just got my nogging turning even more. To the reader, if you are new here’s a little tdlr of Jien before she came to the Luofu. She lived in a whole separate world, think of it like our own Earth, got into a cataclysmic event that essentially opened up a wormhole/blackhole and sucked her in and spat her out into this world on some random planet where she didn’t know the language or anything really, only with her notebook to her nam and the clothes on her lol. She finds out she can do hocus pocus magic with her drawings, gives herself horns/tail, travels to survive and then eventually runs into a travelling merchant (implied Luocha) who then takes her to the Luofu.

Now, we’re on the Luofu. Her presence there stirs a lot of questions and earns her weird looks and this merchant that brought her there is suddenly fucking gone?? Anyway, at first it was believed she was some old Vidyadhara elder from some millenia old battle, or what not, come again, the actual Elders got involved and so did the Divine Foresight. Thankfully, as nicely put by Lingsha, the Luofu people are known for their kindness so they didn’t skin her or anything. As she didn’t know the language yet it took conversations a long time and lots of pointing and repeating words, but she eventually got a hang of it and that is when the actual questioning started. Jien was rather honest with them, but vague and distant, she was simply too tired and really had little will to live atp. She didn’t info dump on them like I am doing here, but she gave them enough to just keep them calm and also to earn herself some more hospitality from them </3

Jing Yuan was involved in a lot of these conversations, although at other times it was lady Fu that attended in his place. But out of the people, Jing Yuan did stand out the most in terms of being approachable. Everyone else, thus far, has been guarded or downright snappy with Jien whereas Jing Yuan was patient. So she did prefer having that guy around just because the others around them also were prompted to follow his lead and practice patience too yk. Somewhere along these lines, with Jien becoming fluent in the language and gaining some more freedom, Jing Yuan and her also grew out of the strict formality phase.

The High Elders hate her ass lowkey, especially after they saw they really can’t do much with her in regards to whatever the fuck they were planning in terms of the DF/Bailu situation, although you can bet they wanted to try. Some Vidyadhara extended their hospitality to Jien and she helped out in turn. Jien did get a reputation for keeping all the young Vidyadhara kids and foxian kids safe though, she’s like a border collie with sheep when it comes to them. Ain’t nothing touching those kids. Kids are naive yk, and she just has that sense of duty to protect that innocence, she was raised in a remote city and in a big family too where lots of people were involved with raising kids so it doesn’t feel out of place for her to take care of some stray kid as if they were her own.

Anyway, back to JY and Jien. Jing Yuan really stepped up bro, he did go out of his way to try and lend more assistance when it came to language learning. He was naturally curious about her - he didn’t fully ever believe she was some miraculous Vidyadhara that was somehow born on another planet, but her likeness to them still earned a healthy amount of intrigue. Eventually the once short conversations turned into long talks as time went on and Jien did become a lot more independent and even got her own house on the Luofu where she’d host some small “tea parties” - literally just two of them yapping. In the start, it was Jien listening to him talk, basically listening to the way he pronounced words and such and that is the main way she became fluent in the language quickly.

Jien then began to publish some books under a pen name “WangWei” - these books are quite literally rewrites of books from her world that she did not want to forget and did want to share with the people here. Surprisingly to her these books did take off, so she started to earn quite a bit too. She had a variety of books, some suited for kids and others for adults so she had a vast range of buyers.

It comes to no surprise that Jing Yuan knew the person behind the pen name was Jien. Hell, bro probably even helped her do it. Insert late nights of Jing Yuan nagging to see a page or for her to tell him how a certain arc ends.

Jien did grow fond of him a lot, and was really grateful for all he did for her. So when she received the ribbon as a gift from him she never was seen wearing her ponytail without it. Note: she did wear ponytails before this, it’s just the ribbon that she matched with JY. It is her way of remembering and honouring him.

The same sentiment goes for the jewelry she wears. Her own love may not be shown through words, but she certainly shows it through all of these small things. Her love for her world is shown by writing about it and sharing it with a bigger public, her love for the authors she read from being shown in the same fashion, her love for her friends shown through wearing the jewelry they gifted her or purchasing things that remind her of them..etc.

Most notable pieces of her past or her friends are these(necklace, bracelet, rings, earrings, ribbon):

Also the pointy ear earrings are a subtle "fuck you" to the High Elders since they began to call her a Fake Vidyadhara as means to to insult her and she just leaned into it, "look at my fake pointy ears y'all".

She is a walking memory in some sense. ALSO! In terms of Jing Yuan she has begun to wear this little back scarf thing in the same fashion as he does! Look at them!

Once Jien went off with the Armed Archeologist she did start to bring him stuff like..more books and small trinkets and foods/drinks. She also began to collect stuff from other planets that remind her of her home. I talked about this before in some other post, but if she can’t get them to her house on the Luofu, she ships them there and she has a Vidyadhara friend that helps out with the things, JY sometimes stops by too and helps out. She has a room that is like a little museum and he enjoys watching the shelves get fuller.

NOW- Let’s get into the meat of the matter. No more domestic fluff I’m afraid. A small warning for mentioned murder and kidnapping and crime overall. TW for Proxy lmao

Jing Yuan did find out why Jien set out into the Guild, and that is the fact she found out Proxy found a way to worm into this world out of her own. Not good. She is a terrible person to summarize . This post isn't about her, I may yap about her and Jien in another post.

Anyway, once Jien returns for the Wardance she gets called to the Scalegorge Waterscape for another chat with the Elders, but they end up arresting her, believing it was her who did all the kidnapping of the Vidyadhara and the murders of the same. (Proxy looks nearly identical to Jien..). In fact - her whole team is accused of helping her, and at the time of her arrest one of the team members(Syaoran) was with her and also got arrested with her lmao pls send help

Jing Yuan is walking a thin line here, he’s already shouldering all the responsibility from his past and doings, now this whole shit with Hoolay is going down and so he’s strung on all fronts, so he can’t even reach Jien to talk about anything.

Jien meanwhile, accepted it. She does want this to go through this legal route the Xianzhou has set for criminals that do these capital crimes. She is bowing her head and doing this "the right way", but Syaoran has none of it, and her team is also livid since they’re all roped into this. They may know Jien is not the person to commit such things and they also know as a fact she was nowhere near the Luofu during the time when the crimes were committed, but try arguing that against these people who also have their 'evidence', also the fact Jien is so distant and travels alone too doesn’t help.

Proxy has been quite diligent and meticilous though, and her crimes that ended up being framed on Jien were most of the ten unpardonable sins lmao

Now for those sins Jien should have been killed, but due to her peculiar circumstances and some string pulling from Jing Yuan she was allowed to go through this trial thing that I genuinely can’t remember the correct name for? But she basically has to stand before all the Arbiter Generals? Idk the name but whatever, I’ll find out later probably.

Jing Yuan does eventually manage to make a crack in the wall of his work and go see her when they were bringing her from prison to have a talk with the High Elders again, but at the same time Dan Heng did go and beat one of them up during that talk he and Lingsha went to, and at the same time Proxy did show up to see Jien before she could get far</3

Idk what she was thinking tbh but oh well. Now this part is one I am still fleshing out, so it is heavy under construction but one thing is for sure and it is that Proxy gets absorbed by Jien - Jien basically rids her of her physical form(read: beats her ass up/disintegrates her physical form) and absorbs her back into herself. A wormhole opens up again, swallows Jien and Syaoran and Jing Yuan is alone afterward.

(side note: for visuals, imagine Jien absorbing Proxy like when Cocolia pushed the stellaron in her chest).

Jing Yuan has her house left to take care of now. The Vidyadhara friend Jien had was unfortunately one of the victims to Proxy. He is left with the question of whether Jien is alive or not, whether she’ll return or not - perhaps it could be best if she did not, with the complicated question of the legal procession raised against her so..

Jien meanwhile, is now trapped in stone in the temple of Justice. How the turns have tabled. How ironic, isn’t it. Jien couldn’t outright kill Proxy, and felt it was her responsibility to punish herself by absorbing Proxy, feeling her hatred, passion and thinking. Proxy, while devoid of a physical form, is still so dead set on being a nuisance, and is seeking ways to escape Jien. Jien may yet return to Xianzhou Luofu. Or maybe not. She misses JY though.

#-stories of old #a real yap #It's nice to yap.. i forgot how it felt RAAAH #I wanna talk more about her so I may make some more yap posts about her and some other characters or just in general a blog focused on her #but for now here's this #I wanted to go into more details but like... if I did this post would be way too long #I just wanted to get the core stuff out there yk #there'll be another time for the details #hsr #hsr oc #honkai star rail oc #original character #lore #hsr original character #jing yuan #jien yuexia #honkai star rail #hsr ocs

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campweehawken · 25 days ago

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Camp Signups Open for 2025!

Hello Campers! This is the official sign up post for Weehawken 2025!

Camp Weehawken is back for another year woohoo!

We are ready to open the doors up for another exciting year of camp Weehawken! Camp will officially start on Saturday June 7th, however we are starting signups today!

We are keeping it pretty similar to last year, so here's a quick refresher!

Returning features-

DISCORD SERVER: The Discord Server is going to be in use again this year for Campfire group RP and general discussion of the AU.

This server was set up to help participants get in touch with each other, discuss the events of Weehawken in a group chat and share art and fics.

Discord is available to computer and mobile users and it’s free to sign up if you don’t already have an account. Requesting a link to the discord will be part of the Weehawken sign up process which I will be detailing below.

Links will be given out for the entirety of the event and won’t close until Camp Weehawken’s conclusion.

Important note: You do not need to join the Discord server to take part in Weehawken. The main posts and character interactions can take place on tumblr between RP/ask blogs. However it is highly recommended that you do so if you don’t want to miss out on anything!

Returning from Last Year: We are allowing participants to be Discord-exclusive, however we are asking that they have at the very least a text post detailing their character for reference. (full explanation here)

Spectator- If you simply want to spectate on Discord without actually participating in the camp RP, all you need to do is send an ask to this blog requesting a link and we’ll give you access to the server.

If you have any questions, send an ask to this blog. Without further ado, here is everything you need to know about signing up.

HOW TO SIGN UP:

Message this blog and give us these three details:

Role: Options are camper, counselor or staff. If you would rather have some other role like camp mascot, send a request! Campers are under the age of 18. They tend to range from 12 - 17 years of age but you can have somewhat younger characters. Only characters 18 years old and up can be staff or counselors. Because this is an AU you can make your character any age you’d like!

Blog Name: You will need to have an RP blog or Info Post to participate in Weehawken; when it’s all set up, tell us the blog name or where to find your Info Post. Tumblr might not let the message through if you type a URL. Just give us the name of the blog, like so: ex. “campweehawken”

Preferred Cabin: (doesn’t apply to staff) Campers and counselors reside in cabins that fit one counselor and a maximum of 8 campers. If you have any preference for what cabin you want to be sorted into, let us know in your registration. If you supply no preference you will be sorted into a random cabin.

Discord (Optional): If you would like a link to the discord, please ask for it in your signup ask.

Take a look at the 2025 Cabin List to see where you and other campers have been sorted as well at who the staff are! Links to all participant blogs will be available there. The list is constantly updating as more submissions come in. Discord-exclusive cabins will have links to the info posts for those characters.

If your blog has more than one character, you will be filling up more than one vacancy spot unless your characters happen to be family: cousins, twins, siblings. Then, the characters can share a bed in the cabin and fill up just one vacancy spot.

INFORMATION LINKS:

Since it’s hard for me to cover all of the topics in one little post, I’m going to give you all some resources to help you figure this event out.

-FAQ: Answers to general questions we receive. Also a well of basic information about this event.

-Camp Weehawken Staff Brochure: Information about camp activities and various roles to be played at Camp.

-Camp Tags: The tags that are used on this blog and participant’s blogs for the event.

If you can’t find an answer to your question in any of these places, just drop us an ask and we’ll respond as soon as we can.

All in all, Camp Weehawken is an open ended event! You can be as creative as you’d like. The moderators of the event are always open to suggestions for RP events, streams and more. But keep in mind that this is a public event! Please be respectful.

If you have any issues with other participants, how things are being run or any other problems, the moderators are here to help. You can send messages to this blog to request help with any topic.

Applications are officially open!!

-Camp Weehawken Directors

#weehawken 2025 #camp weehawken #weehawken mods

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t-am-i-the-asshole · 2 months ago

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WIBTA for telling a fanfic author how much their fanfic meant to me as a teenager?

As a fanfic author, title is not as clear cut as it sounds.

All you need to know about me is I'm 30 now, and I discovered this fanfic at 14.

When I first started discovering fanfiction and fandom, I ended up reading a lot of fic for this one kind of small fandom I'm still in now. When I found the fanfic it was kind of a random search since it didn't even have the characters I was looking for tagged, but I took the chance on it and gave it a read, and ended up hyperfixated on it. I couldn't speak up for the quality of the fanfic nowadays, but to 14 year old me, it was the best thing I could've ever read. I loved it, I loved the characters, I thought it was absolutely amazing. I probably read it ten times over the six months I hyperfixated on it, and it was not a short read.

Now also at age 14, I really wanted to be an aspiring fanfic author as well. And so I did what any neurodivergent teenager does when finding a new hyperfixtion: I wrote myself into the fanfic.

Now I did have some common sense. I knew that rewriting somebody else's fanfic was a big taboo and all, so I deemed it my "writing practice document" and so I spent hours upon hours writing this fanfic just for myself, and then when I moved onto a real fandom hyperfixation, I moved on and stopped writing it and never bothered backing it up, so the story is gone.

And if that was where this begins and ends, it'd be fine. But the thing about this fanfic is that the main character was a self insert (the author said as much.) This meant that I ended up accidentally in a parasocial relationship with an author who only knew I existed because of a single review I left without even having an account on the website. Because I wrote their self insert and my self insert as best friends. And while logically at the time I knew my version of events for the fic were just that, my version of the story, I'd convinced myself that we were going to actually become bffs. This was especially bad because I didn't really have a lot of friends in high school, and so I really, really wanted this fictional friendship with the author's self insert to become real.

Anyways like I said, got into real fandoms, moved on from the awkward parasocial relationship, and the fanfic ended up becoming just a fond memory of mine to occasionally revisit.

Until today. I was looking up images of the canon characters on google for a powerpoint I'm working on and a piece of fanart popped up in the recommended featuring their version of the characters. (And yes, their version is visually distinct enough to be immediately identified despite me having never found their art before this moment.) I was startled, and realized that I'd found their account on another site.

Despite the fic being ancient at this point, I really do want to reach out to tell them how important their fic was. Even if they don't know how or why, I know somebody messaging me something like that would absolutely make my night. But the issue is is that obviously like...there's a lot of baggage here. I formed a parasocial relationship with a fanfic author and rewrote their fic for myself and while I wouldn't mention it to them I do feel like maybe because of the level of degree I obsessed with this fic it probably wouldn't be the smartest idea and idk, it could probably make them a bit uncomfortable to have somebody show up in the inbox of an account where they didn't post the fanfic saying "Hey so back when I was a kid I read your fanfic and absolutely loved it" as well. But the site they posted the fanfic on is definitely barely functioning now adays well enough for me to message them about loving the fic there since I doubt anybody even still uses it.

So tumblr, WIBTA?

#aita #am i the asshole #polls #tumblr polls #poll blog #poll #tumblr am i the asshole

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phandomgiftexchange · 2 years ago

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It's time for...

Hello everyone! Today we have something very exciting to announce: the sign-ups for the Holiday 2023 Phandom Gift Exchange are open!

This event is a gift exchange where people create a phanwork for who they are assigned; you don’t know who will be creating your gift, but you can be assured that their talents will match up to your requests!

How to Sign Up

The grand majority of people participating will be gifting a phandom work to another, therefore, you all will be gifters. The person you will be gifting for will (probably) not also be the person gifting for you. On the form, you’ll choose what kind of gifts you'd like and genres/tropes/themes/etc. you enjoy. You’re also free to provide some more specific prompts. If you're just on tumblr, choose the tumblr group. If you're on twitter or on both platforms, choose the twitter or either option! Sign-ups to be a gifter will close Thursday, November 23rd at 11:59 PM.

The gifter sign-up form is here!

"But wait," you say, "what about the betas?" Or maybe you didn't say that, but some may be wondering. Since the beginning of this event, we've been getting fewer and fewer beta sign-ups, and most gifters participating have not been choosing a beta from our directory, anyway. Therefore, this round, if you'd like to be a beta, let an admin know. We'll put you on our email list and invite you to the Discord server so that you can chat (and perhaps find beta work there), but there will not be an official sign-up.

Timeline

Wednesday, November 8th: Announcement post and sign-ups go out

Thursday, November 23rd: Sign-up form closes at end of day

November 24th-26th: Gifters are contacted with who they are gifting for. (And shhh! It's like a Secret Santa!)

Monday, December 11th: Check-in goes out

Friday, December 15th: Check-in closes, any pinch-hitters contacted soon after

Friday, December 29th: Posting day!

More Details

The gifting assignments will not be random. The admins (@husbants and @ttlmt) will be matching up each gifter with a partner based on the gifter’s self-identified skills and the partner’s likes and prompts.

There will be separate under-18 and 18-and-older groups. A gifter will only be considered to gift for people within their age group. A gifter will also only be considered to gift for people within whichever platform group they choose.

We will be communicating through Tumblr/Twitter DMs and email. There will also be a Discord (the link will be sent through email when assignments go out) and we’ll post updates and announcements there, too. Make sure your DMs are open, you’re checking this blog/the Twitter account, and you’re checking your email during the event!

When the gifters post their gifts on December 29th, they should tag both this account/the Twitter account and their partner on the post. This blog will reblog everyone in the Tumblr group’s posts. Our Twitter will retweet everyone in the Twitter group’s posts.

We’re really hoping this doesn’t happen, but if you are assigned to someone you have blocked or have any sort of issue with, contact one of the admins and we can switch around our own assignments or talk to someone signed up as a pinch-hitter and deal with it. If you know you definitely couldn’t gift for someone, you can also specify this on your sign-up form.

In Conclusion

We hope this event will spread some joy throughout the phandom! Thank you so much for your interest and it would be great if you could reblog and spread the word. If you have any questions, feel free to DM one of the admins or send an ask!

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op-smash-or-pass · 7 months ago

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Starting today! We have a holiday event if you send me a message that contains “Happy Holidays!” You will get either:

A wanted poster, a random offical art, an alt from a game, a TCG card, a random figure, a random character, or one of my One Piece OC’s.

The only figures I am skipping are the 18+ figures of Bonney, Shirahoshi, and Carrot due to them being minors

You will get two per message! Have fun with your gifts! This will go on until January 1st at midnight.

When this goes live I might be asleep (or not honestly I have the worst sleep schedule) so please be patient if I don’t respond right away

Other notes:

-This will not interrupt the smash or pass (trust me we have a LOT of heavy hitters coming soon)

-the tag if you are uninterested is #Rosi’s Holiday exchange

-The spreadsheet for the remaining people is here! if you would like to check that

(If you don’t get a “good” pull don’t take it personally, take it out on the random number generator, this took me several months to finish this spreadsheet and it’s probably never gonna end)

(I’m also posting this the day before thanksgiving because I realized I’m kinda busy Thursday-Saturday, and a bit of Sunday since that’s when I’m going back to my school)

#one piece #one piece smash or pass #op smash or pass #Happy holiday inbox #I did the photo like 30 minutes before this went up

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tsukimefuku · 1 year ago

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Lover's Pass

You and Nanami were sent to investigate cursed activity linked to disappearances in the Lover's Pass. Meanwhile, you both still have to deal with the fallout that happened after the last time you were together.

Based off Lovers Cave from ATLA (obviously).

The song: One last kiss - Hikaru Utada (on Youtube).

Tags: Jujutsu Kaisen, Nanami x OC/Reader, implied Higuruma x OC/Reader, angst, fluff, slight canon typical violence (nothing graphic).

WC: 4.6K

This is part of my "Jujutsu Partners Canon Divergence AU". A sequence of short stories and random drabbles for a Nanami x Reader x Higuruma long fic I might write. To see the ever-growing list of one-shots and short stories, please visit my masterlist :)

Disclaimer: the stories are NOT written and posted in chronological order of events. This happened after the stories "The Event, Part 1" and "The Event, Part 2", preceding "Tactics"(HiguReader). To see where this story fits in the timeline, please check the masterlist mentioned above.

Of course, you were trapped in The Lover’s Pass curse with Nanami after he turned you down. Obviously.

Since the day I met you, the heart began to turn its gears

I can't help but have a hunch that I will lose you

Oh, I know that we've done it so many times

But can you add one last favor?

Oh, Can you give me one last kiss?

It's something that I don’t want to forget

I love you more than you’ll ever know

— Utada Hikaru's "One Last Kiss"

"It's not very appropriate to be talking about such personal matters on your phone while you're inside a car with other passengers." Nanami chided, while he had his arm over the door to his side, not looking at you as he spoke. You had just got out of your call with Higuruma, having set your first not-date with him for later that day.

You scoffed. "Ijichi, did my conversation on the phone regarding a not-date later today offend you in any way?"

Ijichi was taken by surprise, and pushed his glasses back on his nose as he answered, doubtful, "no, Ms. I wasn't offended."

You looked at Nanami, whipping your head towards his position, making it abundantly evident you were glaring at him. He still wouldn't look at you. Then, without a word, you stopped glaring at him and looked outside your window. You were both on the back, glued to your respective doors, trying to put as much empty space between your bodies as possible.

You remembered your earlier conversation with Yaga.

"Do I really have to go with Nanami?" you asked, feeling defeated.

"You're the only two grade 1 sorcerers available. The others have got their plates full. From what we've learned, no one should go inside this curse's hiding place alone, so it's necessary to send two of you."

"What a bore." You said, pinching the bridge of your nose with two fingers. "So, the Lover's Pass curse. Some kids went missing trying to navigate underground tunnels because they were idiots. What do the legends say?"

"The origins of these tunnels are uncertain." Nanami began. You were displeased, and grunted at it lightly, expecting Ijichi to go over the briefing again, loathing having to listen to his voice. Nanami moved on, unbothered. "The legend says that a long time ago, two people from two rival families used those tunnels to meet each other in secrecy. It became an underground destination for couples, both literally and figuratively, it seems, but it has recently become a hotspot for cursed activity. There are currently 4 people missing. Their status is unknown."

"Yeah, yeah. Sure." You sighed, dismissive, leaning your temple over the car's window. You heard Nanami sighing loudly on his side of the car, knowing full well he did it just so you could hear him, and the tension between the two of you was so intense it could be ceviche’d with a blunt blade.

Ijichi was particularly uncomfortable in the driver's seat, turning the radio on, trying to fill the dreadful silence with anything until you all got to your destination.

This is going to be hell.

“Ijichi, can we make a quick stop? I haven’t had any breakfast today.” You asked.

“Of course. I have to put some gas in, too.” Ijichi replied.

“That is the reason most people usually wake up early enough to be ready in time for their appointments.” Nanami pointed out, unsolicited.

“Nanami, get off my case. I’m not in the mood to hear this kind of chastising. Especially from you.” You retorted, keeping a low voice that was glimmering with incandescent fury.

Ijichi was terrified, worried he might be caught in the middle of a crossfire.

Nanami finally looked in your direction, with you refusing to make eye contact, but said nothing, returning his gaze to the view up ahead.

***

As you both got out of the car, you picked up your phone, only to realize it had very poor signal. You left a small bag with some cookies and water inside the car.

“Ijichi, will you wait for us here? We don’t have great cellphone reception.” You said, putting your phone back inside your waist bag.

“That is the usual course of action when we’re accompanied by an assistant.” Yet again, Nanami pointed out, unprompted.

You sighed heavily, and spent no words answering him, knowing full well it’d be tossing paper scraps to the wind. Ijichi simply nodded in your direction, uneasy at the growing tension between you and the ratio sorcerer. You waved at Ijichi, and started walking towards the entrance to the tunnel maze. It seemed to be under what was once an enormous mansion, debris being the only clues something ever stood there.

As you finished descending the stairs, Nanami reached you, and both started walking inside the dark tunnels. They were all haphazardly made, basically consisting of very rustic diggings and walls made of dirt. You grabbed a flashlight you had brought, and lit the way for you both.

The pair was walking for what seemed like ten minutes, and you made markings with your cursed energy in order to make the coming back process easier. Like leaving a breadcrumb trail.

The silence engulfing the steps was becoming unnerving, given that, since your last conversation, you had been furious with Nanami. He tried ringing your phone twice since then, and both times you refused his call.

He called your name to say something, and you instantly (involuntarily) sighed in contempt, still not looking at him. “What?”

“It’s about the curse. I do not intend to have a proper conversation in the middle of our mission, rest assured.” He replied, nonchalantly.

“You never intended to have a conversation.” You retorted, annoyed.

Nanami sighed. “We can talk about this in a later time. Now, let us look inside that tunnel. I believe I saw something.” He said, pointing to a turn to the left you both had just passed by.

“Fine.” You made your way back and lit the flashlight towards the tunnel Nanami had pointed at. However, as soon as you did, it became a solid wall.

What?

You drew the light away and over the same spot a few times, and it was certain: there was no way down there anymore.

“What did you see, Nanami?” You inquired, staring at the wall, confused.

You heard some ruffling, and saw Nanami unbutton his suit jacket, pulling his blunt blade from his back. “I saw a quick movement, like someone or something darting through the tunnel. I believe the curse is here.”

You thought for a moment, and couldn’t sense any type of concentrated cursed energy near.

“Nanami, let’s go back and check on the markings we left along the path.”

You both began walking back, alert to anything that might jump you on the way. However, you were met with another solid wall. Upon further inspection, you noticed that one of the markings you made could be partially seen in one of the corners of that tunnel.

“Nanami, look.” You said, pointing at it.

“I see. It can shift space inside the tunnels.”

“That might be the reason these people are going missing. They’re probably still down here.”

He nodded. “Yes. Let’s hurry.”

You kept walking for what felt like half an hour, and started to wonder if this curse was also able to stretch space. These tunnels were supposed to be less than 2 kilometers long, but you had surely been walking much more than that, and you didn’t feel like you were walking in circles. Also, there was no sign of other people ever having been down there.

“Nanami, I think we’re inside the curse. I mean, I don’t feel we’ve been walking in circles.”

“I understand your point. However, we can’t be sure of that.”

“We’ve literally been walking in a straight line and took less than two turns, Nanami. I’m pretty sure about it.” You answered him. For some reason, his simple correction, something so innocuous, brought up the anger you had been feeling for him these past few days.

Nanami sighed.

“Care to enlighten me?” You asked, voice poking at him. You were looking for trouble, clearly.

“If this curse actually distorts space, as we’re suspecting, the physics of it might be broken. There is no point in wondering if we’re walking in circles or not. We’re already under its effect.” He said, matter-of-factly.

This definitely rubbed you the wrong way.

You sighed. “Thanks for the class, teacher. Didn’t know curses could do that. It’s not like I came from a family with a centuries-old tradition on jujutsu, but well, maybe I don’t know how curses work.” You spat out, angrily, turning around to face Nanami.

He sighed, in a mixture of annoyance and tiredness. “This is not the moment for this.”

“Oh, for what? For you to remember that I’m not an idiot that has no idea what she’s dealing with? It sure isn’t. You should’ve thought about it days ago!”

He addressed you by your last name “-san”, when he started to speak again, and that was your last straw.

“We’re past that, aren’t we? It wasn't a last name basis a few nights ago.”

“You see, this is precisely the kind of predicament I hoped to avoid when we both agreed that getting romantically involved would be a foolish move.”

“Oh, Nanami-san, getting involved wasn’t the issue. The issue was what you did right after.”

“Now, please enlighten me on what exactly I have done wrong. I’ve been trying my best to be respectful and proceed with this clearly needed conversation.” He answered, his monotone not concealing very well his own feelings of dissatisfaction.

“Aren’t you the big shot that knows everything about the hardships of a jujutsu sorcerer’s life? Figure it out yourself.” You exclaimed.

“Are you displeased at what you perceived as a rejection of affectionate advances?” Nanami inquired.

You scoffed and looked at him, in utter and complete disbelief. “First and foremost, I’m not displeased, I’m furious. Second, you really think I’d be enraged at you because I felt rejected? Do I look like a fucking school girl?!” This was the very first time you ever cursed at Nanami, and it surprised him.

However, before he could answer, something spiked up from the floor, separating you both even further. It was a red mass that looked like a tentacle, but not quite. It first whipped at you, and you used your cursed technique to launch one of your small grenades at it. At impact, the shock waves from the explosion caused the tunnel to make a not so safe noise.

Shit. I can’t use my technique. This might collapse the entire tunnel system on our heads.

“Let me handle this! Your technique is no good here. It might knock down the surrounding walls!” Nanami shouted, as he advanced towards the curse’s tentacle.

“No shit, Sherlock!” You yelled back, jumping and rolling when it dealt a strong blow where you were previously standing.

He swiftly dealt a 7:3 critical hit at the tentacle’s base, and it was cleanly cut. It fell, squirming softly before it stopped. You looked closer, and the tentacle seemed to be made out of several red threads, all tightly-knit together.

“What the hell?”

“Well, it is called the Lover’s Pass. You’re probably familiar with the red thread myth.” Nanami said, pushing his glasses back in place.

“I am. I just didn’t expect it to be so... Thematic?” You answered, getting up, huffing.

“Neither did I.” He replied, as you both resumed your walking.

***

“Nanami, this is pointless. We’re not getting anywhere.” Complaining, you leaned against one of the walls. You both had been walking for almost three hours at this point. “Apart from that tentacle, the curse hasn't approached us.”

He sighed and also leaned against one of the walls, on the opposite side, looking at you. You didn’t look at him back, though.

“Is there anything about the legend from Lover’s Pass that could help us solve this?” You asked, defeated.

Nanami thought for a moment, resting one of his hands on his chin.

“Legend has it that the only way for leaving the maze of Lover’s Pass is through an act of... True love.” Nanami remembered, instantly pinching the bridge of his nose, still with his glasses on. A faint grunt from him could be heard.

You realized it as soon as he did.

“Like a kiss or something like that?”

He shrugged, displeased. “Perhaps. It’s an open-ended statement. I do not care much for those.”

You let out a loud ugh. “Are you serious? That’s the legend?”

“I’m afraid so.”

You sighed deeply, then approached Nanami. “Fine, let’s get this over with.”

He was slightly surprised, but offered no resistance, given he knew this was an alternative you both should try, and you surely had enough intimacy for that.

You kissed him on the lips swiftly, dissociating as much as you could when doing so. His body was rigid at the alien sensation of you pressing your lips against his so… Indifferently.

You both waited for a few seconds after that, but absolutely nothing happened.

“Goddammit. Ah, well, worth the shot.” You shrugged off.

He sighed and pulled on his tie lightly, opening the button on the top of his shirt. “I believe we’re on the right track to solve this conundrum. But there is something about what just happened.”

“What do you mean?”

“This surely couldn’t be interpreted as an act of true love.” He pointed out.

You grunted, looking away. You were having a hard time looking at Nanami today, overall, unless you were bursting with anger, or glaring.

“You won’t even look at me properly, and haven't, ever since we picked you up earlier this morning.” Nanami noted.

Now you looked at him, without making any effort this time to conceal the rage you had bubbling inside, translated on the facial expression you had on.

“I’m just too angry at you right now to be affectionate!” You spat.

He sighed.

“I apologize.” Nanami said.

“For what?” You inquired.

“You’re furious with me, and have been for days. I don’t know why, but it doesn’t prevent me from apologizing.”

Your rage dripped from your next words like poison.

“If you don’t know why you’re apologizing, don’t even bother.”

“Then, please, tell me what I’ve done to upset you this greatly.”

“No! Figure it out for yourself. Clearly you know more about things than I do, don’t you, Nanami?” You were nearly growling.

Suddenly, another tentacle appeared, but this time it came from the upper part of the walls, right behind you. Before you could react, it violently whipped you against the wall, and pierced through your right shoulder. You heard Nanami calling out your name. The pain shot through your body like cold nitrogen, and you almost reacted using your cursed technique, but restrained at the last moment, remembering the risks it ensued.

He appeared swiftly, and dealt a 7:3 blow to the tentacle's base, having it fall down beside you both. You fell to your knees and held your shoulder with your other hand, huffing, before you began employing your RCT for healing.

Nanami kneeled in front of you. “Are you alright?” He asked, mindlessly putting his free hand on your cheek, effectively cupping your face. You shivered at his touch, and looked him in the eyes. Underneath his glasses, you could see a slightly worried gaze, and that chipped away at your fury-fueled emotional brick wall.

“I’m… fine. I’m already healing myself. But thank you.”

He nodded, still cupping your face in a tender, affectionate way.

You both remained in that position for a little while, gazing at each other. It was then that you noticed the faint light from what looked like fireflies extending towards the tunnel maze, making some turns until it disappeared.

“What…?” You got up, and was left dumbfounded, because the lights suddenly went away. “Did you see that?”

Recomposing himself, Nanami got up. “I did.”

Then, it clicked.

“We’re attacked by the red threads when we’re fighting. And I guess the lights show the way out. They appeared when we-” you stopped in your tracks.

“When we had a moment of-”

“True love.” You choked out, the words pulling painfully at your heart strings. “Okay, I get it now.”

He put his blunt blade tucked away in his harness, and stood right in front of you.

“Then, we must talk.” Nanami said, in his matter-of-factly way. You were looking at the ground, and didn’t lift your gaze to meet his. He sighed softly and relaxed his shoulders, taking off his glasses, now speaking with a husky, softer voice. “I would like to talk to you, please, and be given the chance to understand what I’ve done to hurt you.”

You were caught off guard.

“Please.” He repeated, putting his finger under your chin to lift your eyes, and you did so, meeting his. This was the first time ever since that night he seemed to be actually looking at you, and not past you.

You sighed, as he put his hand over your shoulder, softly rubbing his thumb over it.

"Did you feel like I have taken undue advantage of the situation that night?" He asked, earnestly.

"No! It's not that." You pondered for a moment. Then, you began speaking again. "You lectured me that day, Nanami. It wasn't a conversation."

He was slightly surprised, but stayed silent, giving you time to elaborate.

"You never wanted to talk to me, you just had your mind made up. I was angry at you because you made a decision that affects us both entirely on your own, without even asking me about anything. You completely disregarded my input in your equation." You finally explained. "It was patronizing, and I felt deeply hurt by it."

Nanami then realized what he had done. Trying to shield you from hurt, he had pushed you exactly in hurt's way.

He sighed deeply as he put his other hand on your arm. "I... I apologize, truly."

You both locked eyes for a moment, and you felt the already so familiar fluttering heart. Your heart beat for this man, just like the sun rose for the day, and the moon came out for the night. The profound connection you had, which transcended time and space for more than a decade, had translated into the way each pump fervently happened because of, and for, him. You could barely breathe when he gazed at you like this.

With a sharp tug, you grabbed his tie and pulled him in your direction, locking lips, feeling the bright explosion from the longing that had swept you away in anger. You missed being close to Nanami so profoundly the past few days that it ached in places you never even realized existed, every pain pulsing away at your last kiss. He pulled you closer, diving into the passionate kiss, in his own silent sorrow and apology.

You barely felt the few tears that streamed down your eyes as you were both kissing. For the first time, the all consuming rage you felt had revealed its true colors. It wasn't anger; it was sadness.

You were overwhelmed with sadness and felt profoundly disappointed that, out of everyone, Nanami, the person you trusted the most, with your heart and with your life, was the one to hurt you so severely. You didn't feel used — you felt completely betrayed.

As your faces parted, you kept your eyes closed, fighting the urge to cry. He saw your pained expression, and a dark pit had formed in his stomach, the gravitational pull of guilt threatening to bring him down on his knees. Nanami cupped your face in between his hands and realized it was damp. Oh, I am a complete and utter imbecile.

"I am profoundly and sincerely sorry" he said, pulling you in for a hug, burying your face in his chest while he held the back of your head.

You sighed, hugging him back tightly and breathing intensely, trying to free up the heaviness that took over your chest. He nosed your hair, and trembled to your flowery aroma, today, smelling like daffodils. Oh, how much he had missed it, and you had absolutely no idea.

At that point, the fireflies began to appear again.

Nanami softly parted from you. "Look."

You turned your head, and saw them. There were many fireflies all over, lighting the tunnels greatly. It was actually... Beautiful. You separated from Nanami, sliding softly out of his embrace. He looked at you, somewhat apprehensive.

"We can get back to talking after we're finished here, okay?" You reassured him.

He nodded, and you both began to follow the fireflies' path.

As you were walking, you saw a couple, two women, laid on the ground beside each other, seemingly passed out. You took one of them in your arms, and Nanami did the same. Further ahead, you saw someone else, but when you both approached, realized this person must've been deceased for a while now. He was holding onto a small, bloody pocket knife.

Both of you decided to keep walking, and saw a bright white light at the end of the longest tunnel. The fireflies were leading you there, so you followed suit, finally reaching what seemed to be an empty white room. It wasn't empty, however. A woman — or what seemed like one — was on the ground, apparently on her knees, with her face in her hands, crying.

"Nanami, can you hold them both?" You asked, whispering. He nodded, and you put the lady you were carrying over his shoulder.

You then silently made your way towards the curse, summoning a grenade in your hand. This seemed to be in an almost separate dimension from the tunnel, so you figured it'd be probably safe using your technique here.

Why... Why did he abandon me here? The curse pleaded for an answer, stopping you in your tracks. He left me here to die- to die- to die-

You noticed that her neck seemed to be cut, and was oozing blood that dripped down the front of her white dress.

"Nanami, you told me there were four people missing, right? But we only saw one body..." you said, keeping your eyes laser-focused on the cursed spirit in front of you.

"Yes, during the course of the last two weeks. Two couples." He pondered for a moment. " ... Oh, I see."

This woman was the last missing person. The curse itself.

She had cursed herself at being abandoned to die by her lover in the Lover's Pass.

Why did he betray- betray- betray me!? The curse wailed, seemingly self-embracing, in a pitiful gesture for self comfort.

That was a heartbreaking sight to behold.

"Hey, Nanami, tell me something." You said, still looking at her.

"What?" He asked.

"If we exorcize her, will her spirit be freed or disappear along with the cursed energy tethered to it?"

Nanami was silent for a moment. "I do not know."

You sighed, sorrowful, and evaporated away the grenade you were holding onto, kneeling in front of the curse.

"Hey." You said, pulling its attention to you. Nanami was standing behind you, apprehensive, while he held the two passed out women. However, he decided to trust you, and stood down.

Why- why did he kill me?! Her eyes were pitch black, and sent chills down your spine.

"You have to forgive him. You have passed, there is nothing else that can be done. You both have. Only when you let go, will you be free. You cursed yourself." You said, warmly, sparing her a smile.

Her weeping started to subdue.

"You have to pass onto the other side." You insisted.

I can't- can't- can't- forgive him! He doesn't deserve- deserve- it! The cursed spirit shrieked, furiously.

"Then, don't do it for him. Do it for you. Free yourself. Only you can do that."

The curse's howling stopped, and you got up, stepping back, ready to pull a grenade on her if it were necessary. You had tried your best to free this spirit without exorcizing it.

The cursed spirit got up too, and turned it's back to you, suddenly being engulfed in all the fireflies that were spread throughout the tunnels. They got absorbed into her, and she radiated pure white for a moment, before you both could see it. She now looked human, a tall woman with long brown hair and a beautiful white summer dress, weaved around with red stitches all throughout.

You smiled, and she turned around to look at you.

Thank you, the woman said, before stepping towards, away from you, disappearing into thin air.

Then, the pure white light that replaced all the walls, floor, and ceiling began to fade away as well. After a few moments, you and Nanami, as well as the two girls, were finally back to the entrance to the Lover's Pass.

***

After you left the women at the hospital, you, Ijichi and Nanami were back in Tokyo. You asked Ijichi to let you out of the car near the restaurant Higuruma had told you he'd be at.

You got out of the car, waving Ijichi goodbye, but were surprised to see that Nanami stepped out of the car as well, calling your name. Ijichi left, probably because Nanami told him to do so before he made his way out.

"Can we resume our conversation?" He inquired, looking at you... pleadingly?

You sighed. "Okay. Just give me a moment." You grabbed your phone and texted Higuruma, letting him know you'd be late.

You looked around and spotted a bench, walking towards it, waving Nanami to follow you. He did, and you both sat down on the opposite ends of it, looking at each other. The silence grew uncomfortable between the two, given none knew who'd speak first.

He did.

"Once again, I'd like to apologize for the hurt that I've caused you," Nanami said, earnestly, "and I hope you can forgive me for that."

"Will it make any difference to you if I tell you I already forgave you?"

Nanami was slightly taken aback. You continued.

"It seems that every time I forgive you or tell you there is nothing to forgive, my words just fall on deaf ears." You sighed. "I can't keep telling you there is nothing to be forgiven when you just won't listen. You have to forgive yourself. We can’t... You have to move past it. I'm tired of this, I've just about had it, Nanami."

He stayed silent.

"You were not saving me, or sparing me, when you made that decision by yourself. You broke my heart, Nanami. You wanted to protect me, and I understand that. I'm thankful for that. But you did it all wrong."

He sighed deeply. "Could you find it in yourself to forgive me?"

You gazed at him. "I forgive you. But I can’t forget this. And even if I can still trust you with my life, I don’t think I can trust you with my heart again."

These words cut through him like sharp blades. Hearing them felt worse than he had anticipated.

"That's reasonable." He finally replied, defeated.

There was nothing more to be said. You cupped his face with your hands, and he looked at you longingly, knowing what would come next.

You pressed one gentle last kiss on Nanami's lips as you said goodbye.

He was left sitting alone on that bench, as he saw you walking away to go on a date with someone else, taking your flowery scent and soft touch with you, away from him.

It felt more miserable than he thought it would.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu nanami #nanami kento #jjk nanami #jjk fanfic #nanami x reader #nanami x you #jjk imagines #jjk x you #nanami kento angst #nanami angst #kento nanami angst #jjk angst #jjk drabbles #drabble

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raveneira · 10 months ago

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Random but i miss 2020/21/22 when the KawaSara fandom was so active, now i barely see people talking about them or making content. Someone needs to bring back the KawaSara fandom somehow😭.

Ikr? its not much but I am trying to bring the fandom back to life as best I can but Im pretty much a one woman army lol plus a lot of personal life stuff has had me busy which hindered my efforts a bit that Im trying to make up for now, starting with hosting this years KawaSara week since the original organizers didn't do it last year and didn't appear to be going to this year either, so I took over because I knew we had support, fans were telling me how sad they were that it didn't happen last year and was begging for someone to organize it this year, so I took that upon myself to do because I didn't wanna see the week not happen this year either because nobody else stepped up to make it happen.

It sucks how so many got run off by bsa constantly harassing them and making them fearful of even making content for the ship because they knew they would get harassed and didn't wanna deal with it.

Alot of ppl also lost faith in the ship, which is understandable, but stupid IMO because there are ships that have gone through worse than KawaSara and became canon but for some reason ppl treated this like 'oh no, conflict, no way this is happening' and Im just like...danm yall really don't know how shipping works huh? but I mean to each their own but like Vegebul is right there if you wanna see a ship thats been through some REAL shit and look at em now.

It's like todays new age shipping everything has to be smooth sailing, super healthy, super pure, minimal to no conflict, for ppl to ship it and believe it'll be canon when that just isn't how it goes.

Like I even saw a shade tweet one time talkin about 'I actually like my ships vanilla, whats wrong with actually wanting a healthy ship built on mutual respect and positive development without any conflict or drama etc' and Im just like...OK? who tf said you couldn't? but these newbies actually treat shipping like some purity contest and have a weird superiority complex for liking the 'healthier' ships and anyone who doesn't like the 'healthy' ship are weird and horrible and don't care about xyz characters etc

Its so dumb, and childish, if all storytellers followed their logic then we wouldn't have some of the best ships in fiction because only the 'healthy' ones would be canon.

Nobody is saying they cant like healthy ships, but doing so does not make them superior to anyone else nor does it give them the right to dictate what other ppl should ship simply because they disagree and think only healthy ships should be supported, thats what ppl have a problem with. You can argue the opposite side has done the same but there is a big difference in severity between the two, 'healthy' shippers act way more superior and aggressive than 'toxic' shippers [as they call them] are.

But on the bright side KawaSara week has been announced to be happening this year and a surprising amount of ppl liked and retweeted it, so it just goes to show KawaSara fans DO still exist and enjoy the ship, they just went quiet or into hiding because of the harrassment.

And guess what? even tho the event page was specifically tagged KAWASARA don't you know antis 'somehow' found it? not even a day passed since it was posted before multiple antis flocked to the announcement to talk shit, that is a prime example right there why KawaSara fans got so quiet and discouraged from making content and talking about the ship, because THIS is what happens when you dare not fall in line with the BoruSara hivemind cult.

If you dont treat Sarada like Borutos exclusive property whos whole world and character revolves around him, then you don't care about Sarada or her feelings

Their logic not mine, so if you dare pair Sarada with someone other than Boruto who they believe owns her, then you don't care about her. If you don't support the narrative THEY set for her regardless if its been confirmed or stated as a canon fact or not, then you don't care about her because fanon interpretations > canon.

This is why I say this behavior screams insecure, I dunno how you could be the most popular ship with the biggest fandom and the most support, a hug in both the anime and manga, being 'fed good' more than any other ship, yet still be THIS triggered by KawaSara just EXISTING

keep in mind this is the ship they claim is dead, a crackship with zero chance of happening, yet they get so riled up everytime KawaSara is mentioned or so much as have a crumb together they all flock to try and discredit and undermine it, if KawaSara fans just have even a tiny bit of fun and happiness with the ship they come flocking to discourage you and make you feel bad.

That level of obsession with a ship you claim has NO CHANCE and is a non threat because your ship is already canon and set in stone, admit it or not, but their behavior screams that their threatened and arent really confident in their ship themselves which is why they feel the need to try and keep KawaSara down to lift themselves up because its the only way they feel secure, by making US go away, and when we don't, they get mad, because for some odd reason they just cant stand to see another shp besides BoruSara getting attention, love, and support, it drives them MAD.

Which is why you cant convince me their not insecure about their ship, that their not threatened by KawaSara, because to put it into perspective think about it like this, do you see SNS being bothered by SasuHinas existence? no right? know why? cuz their secure in their ship and don't feel threatened by SH, so SH is free to exist openly without SNS harassing them because they don't care, SH is irrelevant and has zero impact on them.

Thats how you would think BoruSara would be given how they boast about themselves, how much they have going for em, their popularity, their support, many moments, you'd think they'd be on cloud 9 not even paying little ol KawaSara and BoruSumi any mind but they do, and for some reason its KawaSara especially that gets under their skin more than anything which is strange tbh since thats the ship thats not even semi canon yet.

Lemme put that into perspective, they are more insecure about a ship thats not even semi canon yet, than BoruMitsu, BoruSumi, KawaAda and BoruAda that are semi canon [since many bsa also ship ksu] let that sink in.

I dunno why they have such a specific hatred towards KawaSara, maybe its because a lot of them hate Kawaki, and because Boruto is the top male prize and Sarada is the top female prize in their eyes, therefore nobody else is good enough for them but each other. And by top prizes, Im talking primarily about eugenics and status.

Read between the lines, what was Sakura? the pretty girl all the guys wanted, what was Sasuke? the cool handsome guy from a prestigious clan all the girls wanted, now what is Sarada? the cool pretty Uchiha princess, what is Boruto? the cool young lord all the girls fall for, their not subtle about it at all.

They discredit Sumire's feelings as insincere so she don't feel like a threat, they diminish and downplay Kawakis bond with team 7 and insist he's not even a part of it, they weirdly were fixated on Kawaki's body being inorganic and therefor concluding he was infertile and therefore couldn't have kids and therefore that'd be the end of the Uchiha clan if she was with him [which is telling of how they perceive her that her primary goal in the relationship would be popping babies, not love] they deny Kawaki as a part of the Uzumaki fam, saying he's unworthy, Naruto should disown him, etc etc, to keep him as the worthless orphan that deserves to die they want him to be.

Again, read between the lines, they dont give a danm about Boruto and Sarada together fr fr, this ship is about eugenics, this ship is about being able to brag about the young lord baggin the Uchiha heiress/Hokage, its about bragging rights, its about having the ship with the 2 biggest prizes, its about OP babies finally fulfilling their long weirdly held desire to see what those clan bloodlines mixed together would create, its about saying you don't want SS 2.0 except when its the ship you want then suddenly its A-ok

Foh man

Sorry I went on a bit of a rant but It really is annoying that KawaSara fans cant just exist in peace and always gotta hear them telling us why we shouldn't ship it, why it has no chance, why BoruSara is so superior and set in stone and we should just accept it yatta yatta yatta instead of just minding their danm business.

Yes I know all fandoms are guilty of this, but none like BoruSara, why? cuz its a far bigger fanbase with more support and they use it to their advantage, doesn't help that a lot of boruto stans support the ship as well as many Sarada fans [mostly Boruto stans tho] they even have SS and NH support too, so you cannot compare it. Their a much larger fandom with way more support that makes it extremely easy for them to bully every other fandom because their much smaller and they know it, everyone knows it, but they get away with it cuz whos gonna stop em? their the biggest and the loudest and therefore are right by default because the smaller fandoms are just 'haters' and 'jealous' 😒 lemme stop here

Bottom line I agree, it was nice back then before Ikemoto changed so much when he took over the writing after Kodachi left, ever since then he has completely butchered Sarada's character beyond recognition, not because she understandably cares and worries about her friend, but because thats ALL she cares and worries about, I don't think anyone has even noticed that Sarada hasn't mentioned Naruto or her mother once since the timeskip started besides that one speech that wasn't about either of them, but just about her defending Boruto, not about any grief over her idol being killed, not remorse for sending her dad away and leaving her mom without her husband, no the one and only time she mentions them is to defend Boruto which is abusmal, she didn't even mention her own dad until Boruto MADE her ask about him.

If thats the ship you want me to support then Im good, I don't want a ship where her only personality trait, motivations, goals, and character as a whole revolves entirely around a man and nothing else, just how to make HIS life better and being there for HIS pain and growth and only lifting HIM up while staying in the background doing nothing and having nothing going on for herself.

I know this may sound like 'but wait that makes it sound like KawaSara wont be canon' no Im not saying that, KawaSara is not off the table even with all that bs Ikemoto has done so far, like I said with Vegebul and just shipping in general, just because things look bad doesn't mean you lost, you haven't lost until somethings made official.

Are BoruSara together? no, are they semi canon? no, have either of them been shown or confirmed to have romantic feelings for each other? no, so nothing is lost yet, even if they were semi canon that still wouldn't be a loss because the other half has to reciprocate, like just cuz Sakura, Ino, and Karin liked Sasuke didn't mean he had to reciprocate any of them, just like even if Sarada liked Boruto doesn't mean he has to reciprocate those feelings or vice versa.

The only time a ship has truely 'lost' is when its actually dead, like one half of it dies for example, or its rival ship gets together, or their relationship is ruined beyond repair, like to the point of no possibility of redemption, only then has a ship truely 'lost' and 'died'

So no, none of this is me saying KawaSara cant still happen, it definitely can, especially with Ikemoto and Kishimoto saying Kawaki would be getting more development soon so there's that, if we get more Kawaki focus there might be some Sarada focus in there too in between. I don't wanna speculate tho but thats just a possibility Im throwing out there.

Regardless, sorry for the rant, but I'm really frustrated by this too because its 2024 now and ppl still cant leave KawaSara tf alone? thats what I meant when I said they take advantage of their size, they know they can silence us, but nobody can silence them, and that pisses me off but what can you do.

But hopefully the announcement of KawaSara week this year will get the fandom active and making content again for fans to enjoy, I will try to contribute something myself, I can understand why a lot of ppl might not wanna bother because of the hate they know they'll receive but I hope they don't let that stop them, it was bad enough KawaSara week wasn't hosted last year and everyone was really bummed about it, I don't want them to be happy seeing it happen this year only to not participate because antis wont let them have fun and enjoy the event in peace 🙏 I really hope the fam stays strong and don't let antis stop them from enjoying THEIR event.

#rave responds #kawasara #pro kawasara #anti-bsa

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fourraccoonsinacoat · 2 years ago

Text

Head Full of Ghosts: Chapter 2

Pairing: Astarion x Dark Urge

Summary: Takes place during the events of Baldur's Gate 3 and explores the romance between Astarion and the Dark Urge, as well as the friendships and relationships she has with her companions. Plus, everyone gives shit to Gale about his cooking. Tags: Slow Burn, Angst, Pining, Humor, Violence, Friends to Lovers, Developing Friendships, Developing Romance, Spoilers for the Dark Urge and BG3 in general, Dark Urge as Original Female Character Rating: Mature (Will eventually be Explicit, just not there yet.) Current Chapter Count: 3/? Read on AO3 (Will post chapters to Tumblr, as well.) Current Word Count: 13,050

Author Notes: I don't just post random Astarion and BG3 nonsense to this blog, I also have an ongoing fanfic! It's currently up to three chapters, and the fourth is in progress. You can read everything that has been written so far on AO3. If it's your cup of tea, I hope you enjoy!

Chapter 2: Getting By

For all of his excitement over the revelation he was now able to survive in sunlight, Astarion would always be a nocturnal animal. 200 years of prowling moonlight-kissed streets and shadow-laden alleyways had ingratiated him to the night, and such longstanding habits were hard to break.

He’d never admit it out loud, and possibly had not even fully admitted it to himself, but he preferred the darkness of the night to the stark light of day. Daylight was a source of exposure. There was no room for secrets in the presence of radiant light, a person’s sins and perversions would be laid bare should they open them up to scrutiny during the day.

But, at night, the world was far more honest with itself. The night was indulgent and protective. Those who would chastise someone for their deviant tastes during the day often slunk off to participate in their own debauchery after dark. The night didn’t care. A person could be as hypocritical, underhanded and insidious as they pleased under the cloak of night. She wouldn’t reveal any secrets, the night was gracious in that way.

And, for that, Astarion was grateful. He would be happy to leave his sins to fester in darkness. There were so many nights he wished to forget. Countless lies whispered under the comforts of shadows, infinite promises broken, and the number of lives he destroyed beneath the cover of dark was untold.

He was a wretched thing, undeserving of the warm comforts of the sun. Wretched things were to be regulated to the night, unfit for the bright revealing light of day. His crimes were too numerous, his sins too horrific.

If he were being honest with himself, he’d admit he didn’t feel deserving of the abilities granted by the illithid tadpole. The day was no place for monsters. And that’s what he was, a monster who had committed countless monstrous deeds over the past 200 years.

So why had Eli’s little outburst bothered him so much? It wasn’t as if she’d said anything he didn’t deserve to hear. He’d been the victim of so many of Cazador’s tantrums. And those made Eli’s little hissy fit from earlier today look boringly tame. He’d endured screaming, yelling, beatings, flayings and so much worse. His mind flinched away from the darker memories, the ones that caused the familiar nausea to stir in his stomach. The nights Cazador had brought company to enjoy the services of his spawns…

He’d remind his guests the stakes and silver were off limits, but any other tools they wanted to use for their private time with the spawns were fair game.

Astarion grimaced and shook his head, as if he could shake off the unwanted images swirling in his mind. Focus. That was behind him. He would never have to grovel for that heathen ever again. He would never be used again. The days of him being passed around like a carcass for Cazador’s vultures to pick at and have their way with were over.

He was the user now. He was the manipulator. He had to be to survive.

And it had all been going well, until today. Until he went just a bit too far and destroyed all his careful planning. All of his work to get Eli to trust him, to get into her circle of protection, to make her believe they were friends with the possibility for something more…he’d fucked it all up. Because of course he did. Because, apparently at some point during his miserable existence, he’d done something to piss off whatever cosmic entity controlled the universe, and now that entity got their rocks off by constantly giving him the proverbial middle finger.

Astarion frowned darkly as he picked through the forested underbrush. The woodland was grim in the bleak night, the moon only a sliver of white light in the dark sky. What weak illumination it did provide was consumed by the forest canopy before it ever made it to the ground. This provided exceptional cover for him to hunt, and for a while his hunger was enough to focus his mind on seeking blood. The forest smelled earthy and old, and Astarion was still adjusting to the cacophony of scents and sounds that were so different from the ones in the city.

Scents of pine and moss instead of perfume and liquor. The trill of a songbird instead of the drawl of a drunken mark. It was…foreign, but nice. Far less chaotic and busy, though sometimes he didn’t mind the chaos of the city. It helped keep him distracted. And distraction was a luxury he wished he had tonight.

But, no…no, the forest tonight was just beautifully serene and enchanting and he hated all of it!

He needed to keep himself out of his head, but with nothing to keep his attention, Astarion kept sinking inward, replaying the events of today and mentally cursing himself for his stupidity. He was disgusted with himself for how he’d responded today. He’d risked everything, his freedom, his protection, his only hope of figuring out what the hell was going on with these tadpoles in their brains…he’d risked all of it because he’d been upset.

Gods below, how pathetic could he get?

How was he supposed to walk back telling Eli he’d celebrate her turning into a mind flayer? The thought of it made him shiver…all those tentacles. Bleh. Ceremorphosis sounded decidedly unpleasant, and there weren’t many people he’d honestly wish it on. There were a few, of course…but none of them were back at camp.

He wouldn’t actually be happy to see Eli turn. In truth, he’d probably be a bit devastated. She was the only one who seemed to be making any progress towards figuring out what these tadpoles could do for them. All the others had balked at the idea of exploring what other abilities their new little hitchhikers could gift them with – well, Gale hadn’t actually been disagreeable about it, but Astarion wasn’t wholly convinced of Gale’s mental soundness, so he didn’t count.

Lae’zel had looked as if she may actually try to set him on fire, sunlight be damned. Eli had to calm her down with reassurances that they were going to look for a creche, as well as a promise that Lae’zel could have the killing blow on the first goblin they crossed paths with that day.

Eli was also the one who’d convinced the rest of their mentally unstable cohort to give him a chance after his…condition came to light. Out of all the bizarre and unnatural things that had occurred over the past few weeks, that was still one of the most unexpected events to have taken place.

Astarion had fully expected Eli to drive a stake into him the night she woke up to him looming over her. He’d had every intention of biting her and drinking of her blood while she slept…perhaps even draining her, his hunger had been so painful that night. He hadn’t been thinking clearly, but even if he had the thought of asking her permission had never occurred to him. It sounded so farfetched as to be laughable. No sane person with control over all their mental faculties would ever agree to let a vampire drink from them. In the 200 years he’d had this condition, the revelation that he was a vampire only ever wrought fear in his victims.

None of them were willing after that…and their screams as he relinquished them to Cazador still haunted the recesses of his dreams and nightmares.

But she’d agreed. She’d let him. She’d put herself in an incredibly dangerous situation that held no benefit for her, and she’d done it for him. He couldn’t wrap his head around it, and he kept expecting her to bring it up as a bargaining chip, or to try and use it as a way to exact some sort of control over him. But she hadn’t, at least not yet. Which was why he’d been planning to proposition her soon with an offer of sex as a way to return the favor. He had no intention of staying in debt to her, and this was an opportunity to keep his plan in motion. If he could bed her, keep her happy and keep her attached to him, then he’d have a far better chance of surviving this insane misadventure.

Problem was, Astarion wasn’t the only person looking to cozy up with their fearless leader. Wyll drooled over Eli so much he was surprised the man didn’t walk around with a bib. There would be others, too. Eli was…

He frowned, trying to parse through the complicated stirring of thoughts that always seemed to crowd into his mind whenever she was the subject of his musings. She was interesting. Beautiful by any definition, her half-drow lineage gifting her with long silvery hair and skin soft and smooth as any he’d touched.

Astarion’s mind wandered, tongue sliding over the back of his teeth as he reminisced over the warmth of her skin against his mouth. The way she’d trembled beneath him when his fangs pierced her neck, her breath quickening against his ear. Gods, she was delicious. The taste of her was something that would be burned onto his memory for centuries, he was sure of it. Astarion wanted so much more than what he’d been given, but he’d agreed to let her be the one to extend the next offer. And after everything, he at least owed her that meager respect.

Except now, she likely never would make that offer. Hells, the next time he saw her he half expected Eli to throw him out of camp.

Astarion suddenly realized he’d been standing out in the forest, lost in his thoughts, for quite some time. He groaned, rubbing at his temple. He may just have to call it for the night, every animal for a mile would have tuned into his presence by now.

Hunt botched by his own hand, Astarion began trudging back towards camp. He was hungry, irritated and now he needed to figure out how to remedy his relationship with their wild-eyed I-will-Eldritch-Blast-you-into-oblivion leader.

Maybe she’d just forget what he’d said to her. Memory loss was kind of her thing, anyway.

“Astarion!”

The pale elf nearly jumped from the sheer amount of…excitement with which his name was called. He couldn’t recall a time when anyone had ever yelled his name with that much enthusiasm - sexual trysts aside, of course.

Astarion stood in the gloom near the edge of the stream that separated their grouping of tents from a nearby aged ruin. He had nearly made it back to camp, feet trudging over a path he had begun to know well due to his nightly prowling. His mind mused over how, only a few short weeks ago, he would not have been capable of crossing the running stream in front of him now. And then she’d called out to him, her voice echoing out from what sounded like a spot inside the battered and fallen down stone structure that had long ago been some grand building with grand purposes.

The voice was buoyant and earnest, and a twist of anxiety tightened in his chest. He recognized that voice as Eli’s, and Eli should be decidedly not excited to see him considering how their last chat went. The only excuse he could conceive of her having was that she wanted something from him. And if that was the case…then maybe the fallout from earlier wasn’t as grim as he’d thought.

He craned his neck to try and catch sight of her. The ruin wasn’t so much a building anymore as it was an ornament upon the landscape. Its walls had long since crumbled and the top of the structure now opened up to the yawning sky, roof rotted away. What little light the slivered moon reflected was hazy and weak, but his darkvision compensated as his keen eyes focused. She was standing near what appeared to be a bench towards the back of the decrepit structure, one hand raised in an over-enthused and slightly erratic wave while in her other hand she held…a bottle?

Astarion’s mouth crooked up in a sly smirk. Was their fearsome and bold leader - the woman whom he’d watched charm tieflings, decapitate harpies and reason with a grown-ass owlbear – getting drunk by herself in the middle of the night?

During his walk back to camp, Astarion had mulled over all the ways he could approach mending the tensions between them. In his mind, all of them had involved a very sober and annoyed Eli and there was a 50/50 chance that the discussion would end with her polymorphing him into a duck.

Zero of these scenarios, however, had involved her drunk, barefoot and knocking about in some rundown ruin like a restless poltergeist.

A practiced and easy smile snapped into place on his face, almost unconsciously, as Astarion made his way to Eli with all the swagger of a fox who’d found a little lost field mouse.

“Hello, my dear,” he cooed silkily, crimson eyes landing upon what appeared to be a rather handsomely embroidered red cloak that Eli had wrapped around her shoulders. He eyed the garment curiously and could not recall having seen it before, and the night was not particularly chilly.

“Now where did this lovely accoutrement come from?” Astarion asked, reaching out and rubbing the hem between his fingers.

It was extremely well made and he could sense the low and staticky undercurrent that tended to vibrate in the air around items infused with magic. This was not some cheap cape, and she certainly hadn’t purchased it from that halfwit merchant in Emerald Grove. The cloak was likely worth more than any of the junk that druid peddled to tourists.

Eli grinned, tipping the neck of the bottle she was holding towards him as he caught the faint scent of currant and cherry. “Would you believe me if I said my demon butler showed up this evening and gave it to me?” she asked cheerily, bringing the bottle to her lips for another swig.

Astarion blinked peculiarly at her, searching her face and waiting a short beat for a punchline that never came. Eli simply watched him with a quirky smile, listing slightly to the left as the alcohol continued to run its course.

“Mmhmm,” he hummed, plucking the bottle from her hand and inspecting its nearly emptied contents. “How many of these have you had this evening?”

Eli squeaked in protest as the wine was usurped from her, hastily reaching to grab it back. “Not enough to begin hallucinating, unfortunately. I didn’t even know I had a butler,” she said as Astarion raised the bottle up and out of her reach, a wily smirk on his lips. “Give it back,” she asserted, like a child who just had a toy snatched from them.

Astarion chuckled and kept the wine just out of her reach as she leaned in to him in another attempt to grab the bottle.

“No.” He met her eyes, brow furrowed in a teasing challenge and expression coyly enticing.

It was so simple to slip back into his charming and roguish persona, like a well-worn coat that fit perfectly every time he put it on. All the little rips in the fabric from past misadventures had been patched as he learned from mistakes and reenforced the farce. He had spent decades learning, testing, crafting and perfecting in order to be whatever his target wanted in that moment. And he was very, very good.

Eli sighed, putting on a show of being frustrated as she leaned back and crossed her arms. “Okay, Withers,” her lips took on a small, self-satisfied quirk as she spoke and the tiniest spark of fondness fired off somewhere deep and distant in Astarion’s brain.

“Thou hast indulged sufficiently at present,” he said in his best impersonation of their grim and ambiguous undead camp counselor. Then, with an effortless smile he added, “Darling.”

Eli short-circuited.

She broke out into unabashed laughter, doubling over as her hands went to her knees for support. Astarion felt a pang of gratification stir in his chest, strangely pleased at having been the source of her laughter.

Taking a step back, Eli sat on the nearby bench, leaning her head up against the stone wall behind it and whiping tears from her eyes.

“Whew,” she breathed out, still grinning. “I haven’t laughed like that since…” her voice trailed off as the smile slowly fell from her face, eyes fixating on the sky above with a troubled and dour sheen to them.

The realization crept up on him slowly that she was trying to recall her life from before the nautiloid and failing. That feeling of gratification now gone, Astarion chewed at his bottom lip for a moment. It was difficult for him to imagine being in the situation she was. His every waking moment was haunted by the memories of the past 200 years. He felt as if his eyes were constantly darting to the shadows whenever he entered a room, expecting to see Cazador or one of his lackeys lurking. A part of him envied her for the memories she no longer possessed, and with that the freedom she had to define her future. But another part of him wondered at the loss and the pain of not knowing one’s own self. Of having no internal sense of true north or identity. The thought of it caused an uncomfortable and tense sensation in his stomach, and suddenly the weight of the bottle in his hand felt a bit more significant.

Clearing his throat, he moved to sit beside Eli on the bench and tipped the wine bottle towards her in offering. Her eyes glanced from his face to the bottle, her expression softening as she took the wine from him.

“You know,” he said, staring at a spot on the ground in front of him with a somber and dark look. “I’d let the mind flayers put ten tadpoles in my brain if it meant ridding myself of some of the memories in my head.” His voice was quiet and held a sense of hesitancy, as if the words might flee from his lips at any moment.

“But, for all of it to be taken…” Astarion paused, collecting his thoughts, before he gave a light huff as a small smile pulled at his mouth. “Well, all things considered, getting drunk all by your lonesome in the middle of the night seems a perfectly acceptable way to cope.”

He glanced back to Eli, who was now staring at him with her head still propped up against the stone wall, light violet eyes flashing like purple fluorite in the underdark. Something was swirling in her thoughtful gaze as she considered him, and Astarion felt both curiosity and anxiety colliding inside his chest as he wondered what her eyes might be searching for.

Astarion had always known his value in the eyes of others was based on the superficial. His worth was measured in the pleasure he brought to partners, in how he made them feel while pressing sweetly whispered lies into their lips. He knew what people saw when they looked at him, always keenly aware of the wayward gazes of strangers as they lingered on his body, their fingers twitching to caress pale smooth skin.

Eli’s eyes, however, were not roaming his body and instead had settled into a calm stare he was finding it somewhat difficult to look away from. It was unnerving, in a sense, and for a moment an irrational fear rose up inside him that she would see past all his frivolity and find him lacking. See the truth behind the façade, that he was just a used up wretch looking to anchor himself to whatever barricade he could put between him and what he knew was coming for him. And then she’d cast him off, because who the hell would want to deal with that?

He didn’t allow the mask to fall, though, and held her gaze with his best come hither stare, tilting his chin down so he peered up at her through soft grey lashes.

“Like what you see, darling?” he asked, voice edged with a suggestive and gravely tone.

He needed to stay in Eli’s good graces, he needed the protection this ragtag group provided. And he’d charm the pants off of her, literally, in order to keep himself safe.

Eli, however, was apparently not on the same line of thought as he was. She blinked back at him, eyes widening and mouth forming into a small ‘O’ as if she were just remembering something. And then she was moving, popping up from the bench and darting past him, walking towards their camp as she tossed some clipped instructions over her shoulder.

“Stay here! I’ll be right back.”

Astarion stared at the empty spot on the bench where Eli had been only a moment ago, confusion and surprise knitting his eyebrows together. That…was new.

When it came to seduction, Astarion held no doubts in regards to his abilities. He was good, and as he perfected his craft it become more and more of a rarity for a mark to turn him down. In fact, in all of his centuries of manipulating targets and entrancing partners, he could not think of a single time when someone had literally fled from his presence while he was in the midst of laying his trap.

“What in the nine hells?” he muttered under his breath, before turning to call after her. “Where are you going?” His voice was a bit more shrill than he’d meant it to be, and he cleared his throat, working to collect himself and gain back some iota of control over the situation.

Eli was halfway across the fallen tree, which served as a makeshift bridge across the stream, when she turned around and threw up her arms, waving him off. “Shush! You want to wake up the whole camp?” she hissed.

And then she was moving off and out of sight, leaving Astarion to wonder how the fuck everything had gone so sideways. He was rather miffed, if he were being honest. No one just got up and walked off in the face of his adoring attention. And what in the hells did she think she was doing, telling him to just sit and wait for her to come back. Astarion didn’t wait for anyone. He wasn’t some bright-eyed eager prey to be toyed with.

Curiosity, however, was getting the better of him. So he sat, sullenly, brooding over how he should just get up and leave. Maybe she’d lied and that hadn’t been her first bottle of wine…it would certainly explain her absurd behavior.

Astarion was still sulking over how offended he was when Eli returned and sat back down next to him on the bench, a new and unopened bottle of something held out towards him. He chuckled, mood lightening as realization dawned on him. Was she trying to get him drunk?

“Aren’t you a sweetheart,” he crooned silkily. “But, I think the camp can only handle one drunken gremlin at a time.”

Eli just rolled her eyes and pushed the bottle into his hands. “You don’t have to drink it right now. I…um…” her jaw tightened for a moment, a look of consideration on her face.

Astarion frowned at her, confused, and then looked to the bottle which she had practically forced upon him. An icy and uncertain pang of surprise settled in his gut as he read the label. Barrel-Aged Callidyrran…a favorite of his. But…how had she…

“You mentioned your preference for it when we were in that apothecary cellar, while you were going off about the amount of ‘unconscionable swill’ being kept down there.” Astarion could hear Eli’s explanation, but he was having difficulty comprehending it.

Why had she remembered such an offhanded and silly comment from him? And why had she then acted on it? What was she hoping to achieve? He just continued to stare at the bottle, brows furrowing in confusion and slight frustration. He could feel her eyes on him, expectant and hopeful, but couldn’t bring himself to look up.

“So,” Eli continued. “When we got back to the Grove, I paid Mattis a few coin to find some bottles. I have no clue how he did it, that kid’s potential is highly underutilized at present, but he had two of them the next day. So, I added them to our camp supplies thinking it could be a nice surprise, but…” her voice trailed off and Astarion finally looked to her, expression guarded and hesitant.

He noticed the flush of her cheeks and could hear the quickening of her heart. He was suddenly very aware of the blood rushing just below her skin, his tongue rubbing at the back of his teeth as he recalled the phantom taste of her. If there was something she wanted from him, she didn’t need to try and bribe him with favors and trinkets. She already possessed something he dearly wanted, though he would never be so bold about blatantly saying so.

Eli held his gaze for a moment before glancing sideways and running a hand through her long silvery hair, pushing it back from her face. “Well, I noticed that you don’t seem to get into the camp supplies, which make sense because the whole vampire thing.” She shrugged to herself and then looked back to him, eyes focused with an edge of determination.

“So, I wanted to give this to you and also say that I’m really sorry for what I said to you earlier today. It wasn’t fair or right of me to go off on you like that,” Eli said, concluding her explanation and allowing a long moment of silence to pass between them.

Astarion’s mind was spinning. For one thing, it had never even occurred to him that the collection of supplies which they hoarded at camp could be used by anyone. He had simply assumed those supplies were managed by someone that was not him, and that he was not allowed access. A habit carried over from living under Cazador’s rules for so long. He had so few worldly possessions, and anything he did possess was either expressly given to him or acquired through more clandestine means. The thought that he could just take whatever he wanted from their shared stash was almost intimidating, and completely foreign.

What was even more foreign, though, was the act of being given a gift. The concept that someone had remembered something he’d said, and then cared about it enough to actually act upon that information.

His mouth had gone dry and an uncomfortable sensation was prickling between his shoulder blades. No, people didn’t just give him things without having expectations. There was always a cost, always a burden to be met. People weren’t kind just for the hell of it, and they certainly weren’t kind to him. Nor did they apologize out of the goodness of their heart.

No. Eli was playing at something and Astarion wanted to know what it was.

“What do you want?” It came out a bit more accusatory than he’d meant it, but he wasn’t going to balk.

Eli was under no obligation to apologize for what she’d said to him. If she were to cut him out of the group tomorrow, Astarion doubted anyone would miss him. Plus, with him gone the group’s odds of survival may rise given the fact that without him there was no threat of running afoul of any hunters who Cazador may have sent after him. He, on the other hand, very much needed to stay in Eli’s good graces. She had the upper hand here, so why was she acting as if she didn’t?

Eli, looking a bit taken aback by his blunt question, considered her next words for a moment before answering. “I guess…I want to make sure we’re still friends?” she asked, watching him carefully.

Astarion was not a man who often found himself without words. But in that moment, he was struck dumb. Friends? What a childish and idiotic concern. Surely, that wasn’t all there was to it?

He watched her quietly for a moment, waiting for the other shoe to drop. For her to end the charade and come clean. But she stayed quiet and simply looked back at him with a tired earnestness that wormed its way into his stomach and twisted it up in knots he wasn’t unsure how to undo. It was slowly dawning on him that, if Eli actually meant what she was saying, this would be the first gift someone had given him in over 200 years.

His eyes slid back to the bottle in his hands and his chest tightened, expression softening as something almost sad flitted across his face. His thumb traced over the deep green glass while his mind whirred and sputtered around what Eli had said. He honestly couldn’t think of the last person he’d considered a friend, and there was a small part of him that desperately wanted to reach out and cling to this offering of friendship like a man drowning.

He didn’t understand any of this. Didn’t understand why she cared. Why she’d remember his pointless offhand comments. Why she’d try to mend the rift between them when she had nothing to gain from doing so.

Why the tightness in his chest was suddenly making it hard to breathe.

He found he had to clear his throat before he was able to speak, and when he did his voice was reticent and soft, unable to mask the skepticism clawing at his thoughts.

“Of course, my dear,” was all he managed as he looked back up to her, the normally effortless and velvety tone of his words cracking ever so slightly.

His response seemed acceptable to Eli, because the relief that broke out on her face was noticeable. She smiled at him, and he could see the fatigue in the way her shoulders sagged and her eyes wavered while she held his gaze.

“I guess I owe you a thank you for this,” Astarion said, indicating the wine which he still held.

Eli stood, stretching her arms above her head as she replied. “You don’t owe me anything. But, it’s appreciated,” she said warmly as she began walking in the direction of camp. “I’m going to try to get some sleep. If that creepy butler of mine comes back, kindly tell him to fuck off.”

Astarion watched her leave and felt a small fond smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He quickly dismissed it and stood, feeling his own weariness beginning to take hold. As he made his way towards his tent, he kept a firm grip on the bottle of Barrel-Aged Callidyrran, carrying it as if it were something delicate and precious.

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