#[ but thank you so much anon!! this was a very nice message to receive! ]

[conquiistador]

nice account

[ Thank you very much! I'm pretty spotty with my activity on here, but I'm happy to be writing Doflamingo! ]

[multiplicity-positivity]

Just saw you're post about the some people on the pro endo comunity being agressive. And I've actually have had the opposite expirience.

The anti endos in my life irl and online are kind of really mean?

I want to have a pro endo account but I'm scared of being harassed, fakeclaimed, etc. A lot (not everyone) of the people who are anti endo are so aggressive, and I'm not in a state where I can really receive that.

Any words of encouragement or tips?

Thank you, have a nice day!

gah, memory issues so we can’t recall what post exactly you’re referring to, sorry.

here are our tips for running a pro-endo account, or some sort of account where all system origins are accepted. it got kind of long and heavy, so we’re putting it under a cut.

1) when you first set up the blog, before you’ve made any post at all, go through some of the anti-endo tags and block those users from your new side blog. some tags to trawl/search through are “#anti endo,” “#endos fuck off,” “#endos aren’t real” and “#endos are trash.” just a heads up, you may see some violent, harmful, or potentially triggering posts in those tags. if you have the energy and capabilities for it, preemptively blocking a lot of users may save you some pain and difficulties down the line.

2) you may very well be harassed or fakeclaimed by running this account. we have been fakeclaimed by others on this blog, and have had users block evade, follow us to our personal accounts, and try to purposefully trigger us. it’s been rough, but this is one of the risks of running an inclusive blog online. some things to keep in mind:

- you can block any user who sends you anonymous asks. just hit the three dots at the top right of the ask page and hit “block anonymous.”

- having anonymous asks turned off entirely could greatly reduce the potential for you to receive hate and unkind messages. personally we like to leave anons on since lots of folks prefer to send asks anonymously, but if you’re worried or nervous, you can definitely turn them off.

- delete any negative comments on your posts as soon as you notice them, and block the users who make them from your side blog. we do this to help keep our posts positive.

- if any asker threatens to dox you, sends you gore or purposefully triggering content, won’t leave you alone, or is block evading, report them to tumblr. we have had to do this before, and tumblr’s been pretty good about banning genuinely harmful or dangerous users.

3) don’t pick fights, don’t cross post into anti-endo tags, and leave anti-endos alone. we only use anti-endo tags if we are tagging a post that mentions them for filtering purposes. if you refrain from engaging with those who you don’t want interacting with you, you’re much less likely to face harassment, in our experience.

4) try to remember that everyone posting on tumblr, regardless of whether or not they are pro-endo, is a person or human being. when someone fakeclaims you or sends you hate, it is probably coming from a place of insecurity and low self-esteem. they may be lashing out as a trauma response, or they may be having difficulties regulating their emotions. none of these things are an excuse or good reason to be an asshole to others, but it is something worth keeping in mind.

when we are fakeclaimed, it is more a poor reflection on the fakeclaimers than it is on who we are as a person or system. you know yourself and your system more than anyone else online, so when you are fakeclaimed, try to just chuckle with your headmates about it, let it roll off your shoulders, and block the user.

we hope this helps. if any of our followers run pro-endo blogs and have some advice for this anon, please share it by all means. and when you do make the blog, anon, feel free to drop the @ here so we can follow and boost your new account. best of luck to you with your future endeavors - running an inclusive blog is not always easy, but for us, it has been an incredibly rewarding and beneficial experience :)

[conkers-thecosy]

Hello, hope you're doing well!

I noticed that you had privated your works on AO3 and was curious if this was a temporary thing, or if you were planning on keeping it this way? Not trying to come across as intruding or rude, I absolutely understand why you might have decided to do so.

-The previous "no AO3 account" anon, who just might have to finally put aside her stubbornness and embarrassment and make one

Hullo there!

I promise, you’re absolutely fine and your message hasn’t come across as rude or intrusive or anything negative at all, for starters! You’re all good 💛

Honestly I’m not sure how permanent the change will be, and I’m sorry it’s come to this really. I’ll be honest, I’ve been on the receiving end of some really personal harassment for a while now - it bounces about, and ebbs and flows, and for the most part I can ignore it. Unfortunately, for the first time I got “guest” comments on my fics that were just… well. Not very nice.

For that reason I’ve decided to make it so that folks will need an account to leave a comment, at least for now. I’m really sorry for readers like yourself who are being shut out at the same time, but truly, I hope you know I wouldn’t take this action lightly. I’m hopeful that once I’ve built myself up again I can change my permissions back to how they were, but I’m not sure how long that will take.

Thank you so much for your question, I’m so sorry I couldn’t answer this a little better!

I hope you’re having a good day!

~Conkers 🌰

[veliseraptor]

maybe this is a little strange message to receive but most days i belive i'm not deserving of kindness or any sort of positive attention i don't think i'm a very good person and it's nice to read your xue yang fics where he gets to have nice things. i feel the way he feels in some ways. your fics are a fantasy i can find some (hate this word but can't think of a better one) comfort in. you treat him with SO much love it's tangible. even if you have him go through some rough stuff there is always an end. the suffering is not forever. so thank you for that!

here's a secret, anon: I do a lot of my writing about characters who "don't deserve" (heavy scare quotes) nice things because it makes me feel a little better about how I "don't deserve" nice things.

so you're really getting something that I'm putting out there, because that's in a lot of ways one of the big emotions I write from. sympathy for fictional characters because I struggle with sympathy for myself. honesty hour here on this blog.

anyway: this is to say, I'm glad that my writing with xue yang in particular can bring you some comfort. and as far as you yourself go, try to be kind to yourself. to deserve or not deserve is an arbitrary concept with shifting goalposts; honestly, my recommendation is to try to ease the phrase as it applies to yourself out of your vocabulary.

[ingravinoveritas]

Just popping by to say how much I appreciate you. Thank you for always keeping a level head. Even when you're disagreeing or calling out bullshit, you still manage to stay diplomatic and respectful. And of course, you always focus on the important things, the main one being that Michael is David's #1 fan (and vice versa)

Aw, thank you so much for this! I can't tell you how nice it was to get this message in my inbox (and apologies for not replying sooner, as I've been entirely swamped and am now trying to catch up on my Asks).

Given that this was from two weeks ago, I'm going to guess that this is mainly in response to the whole situation with David's BAFTA nom and some of the reactions that have occurred as a result. I think a lot of people have said a lot of clumsy things (looking at you, Neil) and while some may not have meant to take away from David's big moment, that still seems to be what's happened. I absolutely believe David is more than deserving of the nomination and it is long overdue at this point. He should've been nominated for Des, or even before that, his role as Alec Hardy in Broadchurch, but I am so glad he's finally gotten a nomination now.

I think the reaction a lot of people had was borne out of how tied together David and Michael's performances are as Aziraphale and Crowley, and the thought that if David were to be nominated for that specific role, then one hopes that Michael will also be nominated for his role as Aziraphale at some other point in the future.

But to your comment about my keeping a level head, I find it interesting that, in the midst of all the theories flying around about why Michael wasn't nominated and questions I got to that effect, this post showed up in the tags the same day you sent me this Ask (blog name is cropped out):

This was very obviously in reference to this Ask that I received and had answered just prior to then. This person didn't even have the nerve to mention my blog by name, but had no problem calling me an "rpf fucker" (really nice...). The question pertained to whether Michael's lack of a BAFTA nom could have been because of Anna's off-putting social media posts prior to the announcement, and I indicated in my response that I did not believe this was the case. I am not about to place blame on Anna for something that she had no part of--which I suppose this person was hoping I would do, to give credence to their ludicrous claims of sexism--and I made my position on the matter clear.

So to your comment about me disagreeing, this was exactly what happened...and yet this person had to twist what I wrote so far around (to the point of lying by omission) just to make their point. And yes, I took that Ask seriously, as I take every Ask/Anon that I get seriously, even the ones that attack me (which is also why it takes me for-freaking-ever to answer the questions in my inbox). According to the above blogger, however, instead I should've responded to the person who sent the Ask by mocking them and telling them how ridiculous and stupid they are. Because just politely disagreeing while still allowing someone the space to share their thoughts is so horrible, but telling someone to fuck off is apparently the height of discourse. Ugh.

In any case, I am very much grateful for this message, and for you and everyone else who follows my blog and has been so lovely. It's your encouragement and kindness that gives me the drive to keep posting, so thank you! ❤️❤️

[somesecretpie]

I've been receiving a lot of asks in my inbox that I don't want to answer because they are essentially the same and I don't wanna flood my tumble with repeat messages. So this is kind of going to be a "general answering my asks."

1.) To all the folks that told me that they liked my OCD comic and that it helped them in some way, thank you so much. I read your message and it made me very happy. I love all of you, stay strong and good luck!

2.) To all the folks asking me whether or not they have OCD and giving me a detailed list of their symptoms, I am not a mental health professional. I cannot diagnose you with any mental health condition over the internet from a little blurb of information. I would be essentially responding the same thing to each one: visit the IOCDF website for information about OCD. Try checking out this page in particular for a list of mental health conditions commonly mistaken for OCD/that share symptoms with OCD. And if you are struggling, seek professional help or talk to a counselor if you are able to. And generally, be careful with self-diagnosis. I am not against well researched self-diagnosis on principal and I think it can be very useful (especially to people that don't have a lot of money) but fear can definitely cause you to jump to conclusions (usually the worst conclusions.) I've self-diagnosed myself with brain tumors, stomach cancer, and a whole lot of other things with little evidence but my own fear. When you read these informational pages, try to do it with a clear mind. And refrain from reading them over and over. Just once or twice. Alright? Alright.

I did answer one of these asks because it seemed a bit severe and I actually did think I could say something useful that wasn't on the IOCDF website but I am not going to answer the other ones. I hope you understand.

3.) To all the folks asking me if their fictional character they have made with OCD is accurate and/or problematic and giving me detailed descriptions of them or asking permission to write a character with OCD: Lol. Lmao.

Okay but really: I appreciate your questions and want to give you a nice pat on the head for trying to write accurately about a condition that is so widely misunderstood. Sincerely, thank you. But once again, I'm gonna just refer you to the IOCDF website for more information on OCD. Because I don't want to fill up my tumblr with a bunch of these. Hope you understand.

Generally though…all of your characters seem …just fine? Yeah they all seem fine. If you feel like need permission to write a character with OCD, you have my permission. Here you go. I am handing you a pass.

The bar for writing OCD characters is so low. It’s underground. If you know what OCD even is, you’re already doing better than most writers. I guess if I can give you one peice of advice: don’t write the OCD as some kind of superpower. It doesn’t give people super detective skills or make people good at math. There is literally nothing positive about it. Characters with OCD can be badass and awesome of course, but not because of their OCD.

If you really want my specific opinion about your blorbo, you can always message me rather than sending me an anon ask. I promise I will not think you are cringe and I might even answer if I am bored.

Have a nice day!

[27-royal-teas]

literally on my knees begging for the phoenix essay because it’s my all time fave fall out boy song and it makes me feel emotions on the shrimp spectrum

ok!! well!! ask and you shall receive, dear anon, your wish is my command :)) and because i love when people are excited about what i have to say and you are very nice <33 however, i will warn you, this is less of a structured essay and more of a massive infodump, so be warned !!

OK SO. THE PHOENIX. first off musically it's a fantastic song. and its actually scientifically proven that typically strings are used to increase musical tension and emotional tension so usually when you hear fast strings it means that they (the artist) want you to feel stressed, angry, or excited. We can apply this to the beginning of The Phoenix specifically because fob wants you to get hyped!!! It's their opening song for their newest album and for them, this shit is TERRIFYING. will you still want them or will you skip to another song? It's such a stark contrast to the first line of cork tree ("brothers and sisters, put this record down") because they want you to do the exact opposite of that. This is the one they want to use to hook you, to pull you in. Fall Out Boy is back, and this time they've brought even more intensity than before. They want to know: will you still be here? will you listen? these strings are not quite the old fall out boy, will you find them compelling and stick around?

andys drum work on this song is also INCREDIBLE. It's got this pounding, heavy beat. i constantly say that andy is the backbone of the band and i feel like that's more musically apparent in this song than anything. If i really want to scrounge for symbolism, I can say that by making andy's drumbeat stand out so much more in this song, the band is saying that they as a whole are more stable and reliable, just like their backbone. the drummer keeps the beat, the pace. they keep the band on track. together, the instruments (drum, strings, bass) bring the song together into a really rounded sound and it feels so FULL. there are some songs that are spiky, but this one is round all the way through.

and now that we're through with talking about the music itself, let's talk about the lyrics. i love the lyrics in this song so fucking much. it's so pete wentz and even more than that it's the most perfect song to open with. im gonna try to discuss every line and how it relates to the album and fall out boy's history at the time of release + they message they attempt to convey with this song and album. ive been wanting to make an essay on this for a while actually so thank you for giving me this ask as an opportunity to barf my stupid brain out onto tumblr

ok anyway let's start off with the first line-- "put on your war paint". this line is repeated twice: the very beginning and the very end. Why? because it's bold. this album is called save rock and roll. it is giving us a mission to accomplish from the very start. we are gearing up for a war. this is the image that is being painted of the entire album, and it starts from the very beginning- put on your war paint, prepare for battle. the first song is us (cough, the band, cough) preparing for the war as a whole. this is the intro, the gather, the plan. because we are saving rock and roll, through this album. this is the revival. we are bringing it home. this part musically is very strong and it feels like structure. we are showing here how much power and stability we have. also it makes me think of that one picture of pete putting on eyeliner

i am skipping the entire first verse for now but i will be back to it in a bit i promise! i want to talk about the chorus: “hey Youngblood/ doesn’t it feel/ like our time is running out/ im gonna change you like a remix/ then I’ll raise you like a phoenix”. we’re just going to go over the first half first because it’s kind of long. I think it’s in interesting choice, ‘Youngblood’. it kind of makes me think of mcr’s killjoys. it’s the motif, i guess— this haunting youth. ‘Youngblood’ addresses us ourselves, full of life and blood and rage. it again goes with the plot line of the album. the chorus has a paced feel, like running through a field at top speed. ‘like our time is running out’ references again the portion of ‘we were gone for so long, will you still listen?’ fall out boy’s limited time is nearly out here. they are fighting the clock. they are years older and more mature and they’ve GROWN. their time is running out and they are begging us to listen. and then my FAVORITE line, probably in this whole song. ‘I’m gonna change you like a remix, then I’ll raise you like a phoenix’. This entire album is a result of change. Folie a Deux was harshly criticized by the media and the fans because it was a change from fob’s norm. they were mocked mercilessly and basically TOLD TO CHANGE. now, here, they are back, they have made it through alive, and they are better than ever. basically, they have changed but on their own terms. you know how a phoenix is reborn through their ashes? They burn to a crisp when they’ve reached their limit and 100 years later are reborn as babies again. This is why the phoenix is such an important song to open with from the beginning of the album, as well as a fantastic metaphor for the band themselves— because it tells you from the start. Fall out boy is the same, but they have changed. They have grown. And they are better than ever, musically and mentally. This is also good symbolism for rising again even when defeated, which I’ll touch on again later

now, onto the second half of the chorus. The phoenix line is repeated, but preceding that is "wearing our vintage misery/ no, i think it looked a little better on me". fall out boy is kind of known as being part of the 'emo trinity' which, at the time of release, consisted of MCR, FOB and Panic! At The Disco. Personally id replace panic with paramore just because i dislike brendon urie strongly but thats just me. anyway, emo as a subculture in itself is incredibly emotional, and that's the point- emo is short for emotional. (feel free to correct me about any of this at any point of time btw, i am in no way an expert). a consistent trend was a lot of black clothing and the haircuts. i guess this isnt relevant. the relevant part was the emotion. fall out boy in 2009 was miserable. all the members were constantly at each other's throats, and eventually they just called it quits (everyone thought they would never come back, which is why the phoenix metaphor works here). by saying 'wearing our vintage misery' they are saying that they are bringing back that sort of emo-emotional aspect back into their new music, their trademark depressing lyrics, but it's improved. it's a better look on them now because they are doing so much better mentally than they were doing before.

let's backtrack a step to discuss the prechorus: "so we can take the world back from a heart attack/ one maniac at a time we will take it back/ you know time crawls on when you're waiting for the song to start so dance alone to the beat of your heart". pete fucking went OFF in this entire song but this section specifically. musically, the prechorus slows it down. it gives the song tension before exploding into the chorus. the first half of the prechorus again brings up the image of SAVE ROCK AND ROLL. i cant exactly recall what horrific events happened in 2013 to give the world a metaphorical heart attack, because i was very young and stupid and unaware of a lot, but i love the word choice here. one MANIAC at a time we will take it back. we are uniting the beaten, the broken and the damned. pretty much all the big names in emo have made their alliances clear: we take in the ones you don't want. they are the hufflepuffs of music. we will take your maniacs, we will take your people. we will build an army of the ones no one loves and we will take back our world together. possibly im interpreting this wrong but. i just think that's a really lovely image.

(also, pete has a motif in his songs-- mania. theres the entire album, for one, but this, as well.)

"time crawls on when youre waiting for the song to start so dance alone to the beat of your heart" is less obviously clear about rebellion and taking back change but it still is incredibly strong about this nonetheless. you can't sit and wait around for change. you can't expect the good things to come to you immediately, that isn't how the world works. when no one is there to lead you, to guide you, you're gonna have to do it yourself. your heart is steady and it knows the way. trust it. dance alone to the beat of your heart.

ok so now im going back to the first verse. sorry for skipping around the song so much. "you are a brick tied to me that's dragging me down/ strike a match and i'll burn you to the ground" i feel like honestly this line is kind of obvious- someone is holding him (pete) back. i'm not going to outright say it was about ashlee (his current ex-wife) because pete never explicitly confirmed it but it definitely seems super likely judging by the time this was written (pete and ashlee divorced in 2011, which was two years before this song was released).

at this point in writing this essay brain barf my thoughts have become a little dead so im looking at lyricgenius to see what they're saying and it is. so not helpful. like bro pls. add some context to WHY these lyrics are arranged this way. but never mind that FOCUS ON THE WRITING TOBY FUCK

ANYWAY. the next line in this verse is "we are the jack o' lanterns in july, setting fire to the sky/ here, here comes with this rising tide, so come on/ put on your war paint". another theme constantly in Pete Wentz Lyrics is summer. i am drawing the connection here specifically from this song and fourth of july. and there it is again! put on your war paint!

fun fact: the story of the jack o lantern apparently is that some guy named jack made a bargain with satan and was doomed to wander the earth with only the company of a hollowed out turnip. again-- the wanderers. we bring in the wanderers, we take them as our own. we are the light in the darkness. we will set the world ablaze. so come on! get ready for war! we will roll in with the tide, and like a tide, we will destroy if we have to, not because we want to, but because it is in our nature.

final line in the verse: "cross walks and crossed hearts and hope to die/ silver clouds with grey lining". these are two popular phrases that have been altered in minor ways that make a huge difference. ive noticed pete tends to do that often. here hes changed 'cross my heart and hope to die' and 'every cloud has a silver lining'. this change is super important because it flips the themes of the two phrases (The Truth Has Been Spoken and There Is Always a Positive, respectively) and it darkens it. what is the correlation between cross walks and hoping to die? the cars. and by saying 'silver clouds with grey lining' he is flipping the saying to read as 'even though something seems light, there is always a dark side... kind of like a yin yang. which makes me think of the current logo, the smiley-frown. it's always about balance and it's always about an even distribution. but that is irrelevant.

and let's have a chat about the second verse: "bring home the boys in scraps/ scrap metal the tanks/ get hitched, make a career out of robbing banks/ because the world is just a teller and we are wearing black masks/ 'you broke our spirit' says the note we pass". this is the most important verse in the song, because this is where the entire theme shows the best. i think from the very start we can make two connections just reading this here, and i bet i can guess what you thought from the start. I bet you saw 'bring home the boys in scraps' and thought oh, toby is totally going to connect that to their motif about 'bring together the unwanted.' and i bet you saw 'we are wearing black masks' and thought ah, toby will definitely relate that to the first line in novocaine. and yeah, you're right. you know me too well, i am a predictable guy. because i 100% will. we KNOW fall out boy. the best example i can use to argue my first point off the top of my head is that they were initially marketed to teenage girls. they were a pop band. i mean, no one can really call them pop now (god, i miss music from the 2000s) but, yeah. no one in the rock or punk scene wanted teenage girls to like their music (because clearly teenage girls were so uncool or whatever) so fall out boy marketed themselves to them. they took in the fans no one wanted.

also, a bank teller is the person who handles customer cash, which is something i did not know until about twenty minutes ago. in the case of a bank robbery, the robber would pass the bank teller a note so that there would be less of a scene. these kind of robberies are called 'note jobs'. so by saying "make a career out of robbing banks/ because the world is just a teller and we are wearing black masks/ 'you broke our spirit' says the note we pass" essentially the band is using a bank robbery as a metaphor for taking back the world and the injustice that has been served to them, as the youth youngbloods. we are trying to take it back as peacefully as possible, but we are still the ones on the side with the gun. the 'note we pass' is the robbery note. lyricgenius was absolutely shit it did not help me with this i feel very proud that i connected all the dots by myself but maybe i am just an idiot and this is already common knowledge.

we are almost done- this has gotten long, a lot longer than i thought it was going to be. hope that's okay. anyway we just have to go over the bridge and then i'll summarize the song as a whole: "the war is won before it's begun/ release the doves, surrender love". this repeats five times. the war is won before it's begun. this is connected to the second part- release the doves, surrender love- because the band doesn't really WANT to fight. they don't want to HAVE to take in the people who aren't given a category. if we could just learn to love those who were different, we might not have war. we would have won it before it's begun. on the third repeat, there is chanting in the background-- 'wave the white flag'. the white flag is a sign of surrender pretty much universally, and it goes hand in hand with what's being said here. and again. i feel like i keep repeating this- it's the intro song. why would they say this? because they don't really want to fight. remember, the point of a note job is to attract as little attention as possible. we don't want a war. we don't WANT to save rock and roll- but we have to. it is our job, as youth- as youngbloods. and THAT'S the message of this song. we are preparing for a fight for justice that we would rather not take part in, but we have to, to protect ourselves and our past and our future and our people.

this is what the band is saying-- we have been gone for so long, but we are back. and we are here to help. we have changed, but you have changed too, and we are better, and together we will take back what we have lost to achieve peace, even if it takes a millenia, even if we go down fighting. because ultimately, we, ourselves, the ostracized and the mocked and the hurt, we are worth it. We will rise above it like a phoenix reborn from the ashes because we are always worth it, and we will always come back.

[mutant-distraction]

Please Read

Thanks to all of my followers and people who see and enjoy my postings. I have always tried to respond to personal messages sent to me and avoid public postings or replies like this.

Recently I got a very nice note from one of you that I was trying to reply to and was cut off by character limits. Somehow the message got lost and I cannot reply directly to you but I will address your questions and concerns and thank you so much.

Recently I have gotten several complaints/rants from anonymous about posting AI. They never give which posting they are concerned about and frankly it is starting to piss me off to the point of considering closing my inbox, through which I have developed good friendships over the 15 or so years I have been on tumblr.

AI is an interesting new form of expression and I agree completely that it should be indentified as what it is. I try and when I find out I have been faked I remove posts or amend them. So please send me any images that your are concerned about and I will respond privately.

The nice person who contacted me talked about the baby platypus which of course is a toy, I gave a similar one to my grand-daughter. I assumed it was obvious, same with technicolor birds. That said the majority of the concerns I have received to date were infact about verifiably real animals or clearly art.

Many things being called AI are digital art which of course is a different thing completely. What is art? Is a photo-montage art? Is painting art? Is leaving a small hand made structure in a gutter art. None are real life. For me art is a form of expression and interpretation of our inner and outer worlds. My own personal art consists of words, sounds, photos, hand made paints, clay, found objects, whatever. I think it is arrogant, ignorant and irrelevant to question someone's art unless they are trying to benefit from intentional misrepresentation.

Currently I am doing paintings that are my version of Australian indigenous people style dot paintings. I am constructing 3 dimensional pieces with ultaviolet light reflective materials including paints I make myself. Some hang from the ceiling. They are displayed in a room which is lined with blacklights. Unfortunately it is impossible to present them online in anything other than video format.

Since I joined tumblr I have had a completely separate blog for my personal artworks and writing, a few of which make it here. I never give out the name of that tumblr.

My first and primary tumblr is ymutate. Mutant Distractions was an early spinoff but entirely different than it is now. Other blogs under this moniker are Mutant Whatnots and RUKnowhere amongst others. In the past ymutate was primary and had other stuff that has since become the focus of other blogs. I have been redefining the focus of each tumblr to be more specific. As I have stated in a previous post my intention has always been to keep track of things that interest me and share content from other platforms that I do not find here. I make an effort to verify anything that is in my mind questionable but that is difficult. So few people identify sources and/or the specifics of their posts. I do not post anything which I dislike. I avoid violence though sometimes paintings or animal photos may contain it. I try to be thought provoking, educating and amusing. That's what art does for me.

Please personal message me with any questions you have. I am considering making my blogs private if I continued to get annymous and useless spam complaints. It is unlikely I will even read anons again but I will not exclude you from mail just yet.

ymutate has always tried to provide entertainment. Legitimately people complain of me over posting but I can do whatever I want, these are personal blogs for all of the wonderful people on tumblr. I follow 1500 people and have thousand of followers (I never cared about numbers) but if I do follow you it is because I like what you offer and do not assume that because do not reblog your postings it is because I don't like them.

Many of you have changed my life for the better and enriched the lives of countless others.

Thank you all so much. May your days be full of wonder and joy,

Sincerely, ymutate.....

[cherrysmokesaconha]

17 years old? Me? Today?

Holy fucking shit.

Thank you so much for all the birthday messages! I appreciate each one of you <3 /pos

I appreciate all the support I received from you. Both anonymous people and non-anonymous people. I thank all the followers I have (even if they are few). I thank everyone who made my days of anger or sadness more joyful and less painful. I appreciate all the anons who interacts or interacted with me, no matter of it was a follower or not or if it was a genuine question or a simply nice message.

Thank you very much for all the support I have received during the time I have been here and will continue to be here.

Thank you very much! I love you all, my dear 2trenchcoaters and BobTorders :)

[therentyoupay]

just want to quickly tell you that i really admire your dedication in completing your 'at the center' fiction, which is WOW, absolutely commendable!! ( and expanding other drabbles as well??? i'm blown away ).

although we've only been following each other recently, i hope to be like you someday and have the motivation to keep posting updates for my fics no matter how long it takes 🥹 okay that's all and have a very nice day!!

thank you!! 😭😭😭😭🙏🙏💖💖💖💖 so much!!! for your sweet comments and for the encouragement and for dropping by to leave a message 😭😭💖💖💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏🙏 I HOPE YOU, TOO, HAVE A VERY NICE DAY ✨

and i'd like to also take a moment to say a few words about (✨forging, fostering✨) the motivation to keep posting updates for fics (no matter how long it takes!!!!), but first, i'd also like to very briefly share with you two of my all-time favorite fanfiction WIPs (one is ongoing 20+ years, and the other is 10+) to help contextualize my response:

#1. ————

More Than Human (Words: 332,245 | Complete: No) by sbj "Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal." - Camus {High School AU!RrB/PpG}

FIRST PUBLISHED: January 31, 2009

LAST UPDATED: June 18, 2019

As of January 7, 2024, the chapter updates span 10 years, 4 months, and 21 days

#2. ————

Re-Entry (Words: 568,178 | Works: 22 | Complete: Yes) and Re-Entry: Journey of the Whills (Words: 923,940 | Works: 59 | Complete: No) Obi-Wan Kenobi, while still a young Padawan, suffers an injury and wakes up with all of the memories, experience, training, and Force-strength of Old Ben Kenobi. {Time Travel AU!Star Wars Re-Write} by flamethrower

FIRST PUBLISHED: October 1, 2002

LAST UPDATED: December 30, 2022

As of January 7, 2024, the chapter updates span 20 years, 3 months, and 6 days

————

these WIPs are only two examples! tons of my favorite stories have spanned multiple years of progress!

mine! ————

at the center (Words: 395,094 | Complete: No) by @therentyoupay Legends and fairy tales, magic and myths, and—at the center of it all—a story of a young, future-Queen and her young, ageless-Guardian; a girl cursed with fear and a god frozen in time, and all of the reasons why seeing isn't always at the heart of believing. {Guardian AU!Jelsa}

FIRST PUBLISHED: January 17, 2014

LAST UPDATED: January 2, 2024

As of January 7, 2024, the chapter updates span 9 years, 11 months, and 22 days (happy almost 10th anniversary!! ✨)

thoughts & feelings! ————

everyone writes at their own pace, in their own time, with the best resources they have, according to whatever life stage(s) they are at 💕

~most readers generally express gratitude and understanding and patience! fandom culture (across fandoms) shifts and changes all the time, so while there are times in fandom (generally) in which the ✨entitled expectation✨ is for fic authors to "WRITE FAST, PUBLISH OFTEN," there are also times in which readers go out of their way to share beautifully encouraging messages like "even if you never update again, i am so grateful for what you have given us (so far)!" and "i will wait for this story to update for the rest of my life, and i will be happy with an update no matter how long it takes" and, often—both messages at the same time. 💖

a good skill to develop is the mental strength to withstand the not-so-nice messages while absorbing the positivity of the lovely ones! i don't post or respond to the really nasty anons i sometimes receive 👀 like the ones that accuse me of having "abandoned nearly all [my] fics"—i personally delete them immediately! anons like that do not deserve someone else's ✨energy✨. (for the first time—i think, ever?—i did post someone's confusing? rude? anon the other day [i.e., i am a hoarder who creates suffering by withholding fic updates?? i think??], but i attribute that choice to publicly post [my reaction gif to that anon] to my current Life Stage™ and my hard-earned self-confidence in the knowledge that I Can Do Hard Things. ✨ my development of that muscle has come from finishing other long-progress fanfics, and, to be honest, Real Life Milestones like going to grad school [twice] and Doing a Dissertation ✨). all in all, the motivation to keep updating is really, at its core, about having the will and the time and the mental energy and the passion to dedicate time to something that you really want to do, even through all the obstacles and nonsense, which takes mental (and emotional) strength! 💖 develop and fortify your mental fortitude! 💖💖💖💖 it's a lifelong process! ✨

and lastly, and most importantly, in my opinion... regardless of whether or not you think any potential readers might be out there (chances are there WILL BE, but that's not the point!!!), just keep writing... and write what you want, and write for yourself! whether you update in two days, or ten years, or twenty-two—do it, anyway!! 💖💖💖💖💖

LOVE YOU, THANK YOU, GOOD LUCK 💖✨ (and keep me posted lol)

[dia-souls]

Yall are so talented and good at writting reaction. I know you all are going through bunch of controversy and all that stuff but I gotta admit one thing that you all got talent and honestly as a dl-fan that's what matter to me the most who cares if you did wrong or were misunderstood as dl-fans we all gotta chill and enjoy instead of taking things to hearts and getting angry at each other afterall we all create contents for each other and than fight amongst ourselves lol its so idiotic thing in my opinion but I don't create content so I might not understand I guess. Anyway back to the topic what other project are you working on cuz I just got free from exams and touched tumblr and there are no updates on any novel or cd drama (I repeat I am not complaining don't block me) I am just asking.

🦋 Admins talk:

Thank you very much, dear Anon, for your kind words, we appreciate you very much. To be honest we all were surprised by your words. You're so kind, thanks for your word of encouragement we all really appreciate the way you comforted us. We are happy to know you like our contents.

We didn't try to steal any content. Our main motive wasn't to steal any content. It's a misunderstanding we just didn't want to bother the admin with unnecessary notification because she left fandom and that's why we added slash but anyway things did get out of hand and we were misunderstood unfortunately in future we will avoid doing it because let's be honest if we knew this would happen we wouldn't have done it in the first place. But it's very good to speak with people before judging them. Because sometimes you don't know anything about them and your wrong judgment will break their hearts. We don't want to discuss this issue more we have already explained the reasons, apologized and all stuff......

Anyway we think you are concerned for us, as admin Afra recently had small issues regarding her health but she is back in town and is better now she will start posting soon once she is better. Admin Irsa is going through exam phase. Admin Ava is also busy too. All three admins have already plans to release some of their fics and Drama CDs as soon as they get free from their busy schedule. The thing is that we all are young and students so give us some time we all will update soon. Your asks will also be answered soon.

We must say that all the admins love this fandom and like to continue producing contents as long as they feel safe and happy. It was a new novel that will start on December 1st. But this will happen if the admins have good mental conditions. Admin Afra has bigger plans for new novels and games you can see here and a vey big project that called diabolik lovers series. She is not in a very good condition now. We will have to wait and see what happens in the future. If everything goes well, the new novel will be published soon.

Again thanks for your lovely message! People like you is what that keep us going in this fandom! One more thing none of the admins plan to leave the fandom and in near future too so don't worry we aren't that weak it's just admin Afra issue did surprise us. She is young so do go easy on her as she receives a lot of hate for stupid reasons and just for a misunderstanding. Please give her some time to regain her mental health back. So remember don't judge people when you are not aware of their situations. Before sending any hate message try to speak with them first and remember mabye you are judging them in a wrong way. We all are here to enjoy and all three admins love publishing contents so let us enjoy doing it and be nice that's it.

[buckys-wintersoldier]

Surprise

First of all, thank you to everyone who joined me and helped me with that idea. For finding those nice words, even when she knows that you appreciate her, even when she knows that you love her work. And a special thank you also to @lives-in-midgard, without her, I would not have found the courage to really do this. You helped me when I was just a minute before I threw that all away.

Skittle? @mrsbuckybarnes1917

Finally, you are allowed to know about the surprise. I made this to thank you. I know you already know that I appreciate you, but I wanted to show you that not only I do, but also other people do, and it’s a better way than just telling you.

But thank you so much for always being so kind and helpful. You’re not annoyed, and even when the day isn’t perfect, sometimes it never changes your kindness. Not many people are like you are, and I hope you know deserve all the good and the best and that you’re worth it.

It’s an honor to be your friend and get your support personally and with fics. It's always fun to talk to you about ideas and add details, but it’s also fun to talk to you about everything else. I hope you know that I will always be there for you and support you as much as I can. The moment you started following me and whenever a notification with your name appeared in my notification, it made me so happy because it was and still is such an honor.

And I’m not the only one who thinks like that, so here are some people who think so too. Enjoy their messages for you.

@ellemj: You were the very first writer to ever reach out to me on Tumblr and honestly, I freaked out a little when I saw your user and realized I'd definitely read your work before. It was like I was living out some kind of dream. You're so kindhearted and willing to talk to other members of the community, it's inspiring. I feel lucky that I've gotten to be on the receiving end of your kindness. Thank you for being a friend and thank you for sharing your amazing works with us all!

@lives-in-midgard: Dear Skittle, I want to let you know that I really enjoy reading your stories and always love to see what you came up with! 💗 Beside that I also really love to see you in my notification or on my for you page. Reading your comments on my fics always makes me smile! I'm sending you hugs! 💞

@buckyysdoll: hon, you truly seem like such a genuinely sweet person. the way you interact with the fics you love and reblog on your page is honestly heartwarming, and you can see even from an outsider’s view how affectionate and encouraging it is. keep up your kindness hon, & happy belated new year too! we need more people like you in this world 💛🌻☀️sending love & hugs from a stranger xx

@sergeantbarnessdoll: I love her. She always has something nice to say, even when you’re having a bad day

anon: I love your work, it always puts a giddy smile on my face and brightens my day. When I see a new post I do a wee happy dance in my seat (or bed).

anon: Hi Skittle I love reading your stories! And I always get excited when I see that you have a new one shot!

@rogersbarber: such an incredible and talented person!!🖤

[napping-sapphic]

this might be stupid cause you can talk for yourself and i don‘t want to imply anything other than that, but i just thought it would be nice to check in with you abt this because idk. if everyone‘s just sort of demanding sort of asking for tiddy pics. idk. i don‘t think i would like that, personally

despite comfort zones differing and that being totally valid and you being perfectly capable of speaking (up) for yourself i just wanted to send a message bc i thought it would be nice to get one like this so. you okay? i guess, i don‘t really know how to phrase it, just. y‘know

just wanted to check in

HEY I APPRECIATE YOU!! SO MUCH!!❤️❤️❤️

Thank you for checking in <3!! I am okay :)!! No one was actually demanding anything or anything like that! Most messages of that type are usually just being a little silly and flirty for fun so I don’t mind them at all and usually just get flattered when I get them :)

That being said I have received some actual demands like that but I am always ready and willing to use my two favorite tactics block or ignore (in the case of bad egg anon asks) to deal with them when needed😌

I feel like it comes across that I’m not the type to ever actually post something or send things like that so I’m happy to take it all as just being flirty for the sake of it :)! And even if I’m wrong I don’t care too much since no one will actually ever get anything from me that I’m not comfortable with.

Thank you so much for checking in though!! Reminders to stick to your boundaries and reevaluate how you feel about situations are SO important and you’re very sweet for taking the time to double check with me :) <3!!!

[lestappenforever]

I just wanted to come by and tell you how much I love your fics and your blog. I've followed you since around the time you started posting and it's so nice to see you interact with people on here and on ao3. You're always so kind to everyone, anons, readers and other blogs alike (I follow a lot of blogs I've seen you interact with) and you have truly created a warm space that I personally appreciate so much. And I'm sure I'm not alone in that.

You are truly such a kind and positive presence in the fandom, and I just wanted to let you know that your kindness is noticed and highly appreciated. Thank you for being here. 🖤

Anon, you have no idea how much this ask means to me. What a truly beautiful message to receive.

Thank you so, so much! I'm so honored you like my fics, and it fills me with warmth to know that you enjoy my blog and see it as a positive, warm place. Being kind is so important to me as I have experienced first-hand and seen what it's like to not receive kindness, and the effect it can have on people. I never want to be the reason others feel what I've felt, and the reason other peole have to deal with the consequences I've seen people I care so deeply about deal with over the years. To know that it's appreciated here means the absolute world to me.

Thank you for making my day with thos exceptionally kind message. I appreciate it and you so very much, and I hope you'll having a lovely Saturday. ❤️

[thatswhatsushesaid]

god i feel weird going on anon because i never do that but i'm like scouting waters here so thoughts on 1) zhancheng 2) chengxian

(nothing to ask about jgy to you tbh it's all just written on this blog and he's not my blorbo fixation of the week alas)

also thank you for your service. i'm constantly browsing your tags rather than going armed into the general tagpost and you cant believe how nice it feels to scroll without being attacked by shitty takes

awwwwwww bless you, anon, this is a really nice message to receive!! 🥹 i'm very glad that my multi-yearlong hyperfixation on jin guangyao makes things a little bit easier/more pleasant for some people in this fandom, even though i know a lot of people desperately wish i would just shut up. unfortunately i don't have many thoughts at all about zhancheng or chengxian as romantic ships, though i've seen some frankly stunning fanart rendering both relationships. in terms of their platonic canon dynamics, i think it is hilarious that lwj and jc spent so much time together hunting for wwx pre-timeskip, just after the sacking of lotus pier, and came away from that time spent together having learned almost nothing about each other in the process.

platonic chengxian is definitely more interesting to me, and i imagine if i didn't have such a terminal case of jgy brainrot (and if wwx didn't just annoy me personally due to /gestures @ the state of fandom discourse), i would be nuts about them. there was so much love and devotion between them in spite of a childhood and adolescence where they very much should not have been friends! they have diametrically opposed priorities and can barely say a civil word to each other towards the end of the first 'act' of the book, and yet they also make tremendous sacrifices for each other.

my personal read on their post-canon dynamic is one i know isn't shared by everyone even in my little patch of the fandom, but i do think that theirs is an example of a relationship where the mutual hurt runs so deep that reconciliation may not be possible, even if the love is still there. and i believe that if either of them were ever in danger again in the future, they would both drop everything to protect each other. that devotion just isn't enough to mend the things keeping them apart.

[anghraine]

I just wanted to drop in this message to say I always enjoy reading your thoughts about things, whether they’re about fandom or other stuff (and whether I agree or not). Through my years on Tumblr, you’re probably one of the blogs I followed the longest. I’m dropping this message now because of everything that’s happening with Tumblr so I don’t know if you will be here much longer so I wanted to express my appreciation while I can. I’m sorry if this message is awkward.

Thank you very much, anon! This was a truly lovely message to receive and I very deeply appreciate it.

I don't plan on deactivating or anything like that, fwiw, and (as you can see!) I still check my activity bar and my dash. I am making a fairly conscious effort to lower my Tumblr-exclusive activity while I back it up/to rely more on Dreamwidth in general for the sort of writing I would have once only posted here (and I'm also trying to finish my dissertation, lol). So that's why my activity has gone so sharply down.

Stuff that I think might be relevant to you all will still be linked from this account, but Tumblr has demonstrated such little respect for its users that I don't really feel great about posting more long-form things over here. I am pretty sad about it, honestly, so it was really nice to receive this at a time when I'm not being particularly entertaining.