#{ I am someone who hyperfixates and talks a whole lot when I'm comfortable with someone. }

[yuichiroswife]

Get To Know Me Meme.

Favorite Color(s): I personally love the color black, always have since I was a child. I just find it very... I dunno how to explain it exactly? It's just mesmerizing to me.

Favorite Flavor(s): I love sweet flavors, but my all time favorite flavors are anything that's sour and I mean SOUR. That extremely sour candy? My favorite. I have eaten so many sour things that I have grown immune to most sour candies. I don't pucker my lips, my eyes don't do the squinty thing, nor do they water. This is probably bad since too much sour stuff destroys your mouth, but I have a bad habit of eating sour stuff to the point the roof of my mouth and tongue are all torn up.

Favorite Genres: Horror and mystery are my two most favorite genres! I also enjoy psychological-horror and some of that really old timey adult humor. I dunno, supposed "humor" nowadays just isn't funny to me, it's pretty bland.

Favorite Music: You see, I've listened to a large assortment of music from the time I was little so I don't really know if I have a favorite music type? Though I can say that I enjoy metal music from back in the era of when my parents were growing up, same with their pop music. I also enjoy more... dark styled music too.

Favorite Movie(s): This is a hard one for me because I don't really watch movies anymore, but since I'm a big ass nerd I'll just list some video game movies/anime movies (and a few actual movies I can recall) that I've enjoyed — Sonic the Hedgehog (2020), Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022), The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023), Train to Busan (2016), Spider-Man (2002), Spider-Man 2 (2004), Spider-Man 3 (2007), My Hero Academia: Two Heroes (2018), My Hero Academia: Heroes Rising (2019), and My Hero Academia: World Heroes' Mission (2021) is the last one I'll list because I don't wanna make this too long.

Favorite Series: Just like I did with the movies, I'm only gonna list a few because it'll end up getting WAY too long (I also assume this means any series, whether it's real or anime or video games): Kimetsu no Yaiba (2016 - 2020), Boku no Hero Academia (2014 - Ongoing), Code Geass (2006 - along with any new additions), Sailor Moon (1991 - along with any new additions), Attack on Titan (2013 - 2023), Shugo Chara (2007 - 2010), Resident Evil (1996 - Ongoing), Sonic the Hedgehog (1991 - Ongoing), Kirby (1992 - Ongoing), Stranger Things (2016 - Ongoing), and Fire Emblem (1990 - Ongoing).

Last Song: Take Me Back To Eden - Sleep Token

Last Series: Jujutsu Kaisen because my sister is forcing me to watch it with her. Help me.

Last Movie: Resident Evil: Death Island

Currently Reading: I am currently reading the Boku no Hero Academia manga (and awaiting new updates) while also being forcefully read/show the Jujutsu Kaisen manga by my little sister.

Currently Watching: My answer for this is the same as my answer for the question about the last series I've watched, Jujutsu Kaisen, because my sister is dead set on making me get into the series with her.

Currently Working On: Nothing really at the moment because I'm still in one of my phases where I can't seem to get anything done without feeling like I'm dying on the inside, hence I've just kinda been gaming to try and lift up my writing mood.

Tagged by: @neglectedbond Tagging: I don't really have many people to tag anymore or know who to tag exactly so just go ahead and steal this from me if you wanna fill this out, make sure to tag me as well so I can see it!

[aubeystawby]

I loved your autistic reader headcanons. this doesn't have to be a request, it can be some back and forth (like a conversation because I absolutely love diving into stuff like this) I'm curious what else these characters will do/act as a result of the readers autism. I'm bad at wording things so I'll get to the point. Hobie canonically isn't consistent because he dislikes consistency, but maybe a reader with autism needs routine and consistency, so how will that change their dynamic? another example is pravitr, as stimmy and cool as he is he might be too loud and the reader might get easily overwhelmed. gwen and Miguel might not be able to figure out what the reader wants/ needs if they're non-verbal or are struggling to speak their mind. what will jess or malala do when the reader is so hyperfixated on something they neglect their own needs. This isn't exactly a request for a part 2 but you're the first person who posted about an autistic reader (that I've seen) so I'd love to maybe talk about this with you and get ideas because it's exciting. I know talking about this here might not be the best but if you're totally cool with it I'd love to just talk about these ideas elsewhere.

Oh this ask has absolutely made my day, I have SO many thoughts on these characters with an autistic reader and I'm soso happy to have someone to talk about it with.

With Hobie I feel like it leans towards a bit like what I said with Jess but even less structure. like i feel like thered have to be a compromise between hobie and reader (which would be a whole ordeal in of itself if youre anything like i am when it comes to having to compromise with things like this) where maybe every fortnight they have to figure out something set-in-stone like hanging out or something? ALSO i know a big thing in lots of reader insert fics people like is the trope of the spider-person randomly showing up at reader's house/apartment with injuries and (ofc all of this differs person-to-person) i feel like thatd have to be a no-go with these characters and an autistic reader, like for me i feel like thatd be such a huge disruption to everything itd probably be the trigger for some sort of downwards spiral. but i totally feel like thisd be a hard thing for hobie and an autitic reader to navigate bc even right now its hard for me to thinking of possible solutions yk?

Youre totally right about Pavitr and I feel like he'd honestly get it wrong a lot of times (which is not at all his fault), and he can be observant but he also might not pick up on the correlation between him being extra loud/energetic and reader's sensory overload? this also makes me think of things like the headcanon of spider people having enhanced sensory stuff leading to them sometimes also experiencing sensory overload — which isnt really a hc i have for pavitr specifically but i feel like on some level he might relate a bit? or maybe hed pick up on reader's reactions because hes seen it happen with other spider people before bc of that heightened senses stuff? I feel like he's a big physical touch guy and is a bit unsure with how to comfort someone if they do get sensory overload bc they might not want more sensations, which means no touching, so comforting/helping with that might be a bit difficult to figure out for him in that regard?

Ohhh boy gwen or miguel with a reader who has run out of words/in general isnt very verbal would certainly be An Experience. they both DO care but ohhhh there is SO much trial and error through it all.

gwen likes silence but also feels a need to fill said silence at the same time, saying the first thing that comes to mind, so like an autistic person who finds comfort in parallel play's worst nightmare. thats something that she'd probably have to be talked to about pretty outright, bless her heart she can just be so awkward and unsure of herself that she might just not pick up on why you get so frustrated with her trying to fill every silence, probably thinking you find it annoying bc of something she said and not bc you just need/enjoy the silence.

I can just imagine miguel just. watching so awkwardly and overthinking with a reader who isnt very verbal at the moment/isnt At All. hed probably ask them a question over and over and Over Again thinking that might help somehow? i feel like he goes through verbal shutdowns maybe? but doesnt really acknowledge them/know what they are, or is never around people when it happens so hes never really had anyone try to help him/communicate him when it happens meaning he has no experience to like draw from when it happens to you and hes on the other side of it?

jess feels a bit like a 'takes no shit' person to me (not in an extreme way but i kinda just get those vibes?) but is also very understanding. if reader is for some reason neglecting basic hygiene or taking care of themself shes at a bit of a crossroads and would need to kind of see how they feel a bit more, because she knows 'tough love' sometimes works with certain people, but a lot of the time its harder/more complicated than that? I'm still trying to get a good understanding of jess's character at the moment so id love to hear more of what you think abt her

As for Malala i feel like she has experienced neglecting taking care of herself a bit before, from being extra busy or stressed etc, but not really in the way an autistic reader might. shed probably go through a whole variety of things to try to help, and also just feeling a bit guilty knowing how hard it would be for them once they get out of this low point and have to face everything they missed/neglected? thatd really feel discouraging for her i feel. i feel like shes also the kind of person who yes, understand that she cant fix everything for you and sometimes a professional/adult needs to get involved, but she also really wants to try her best to help, and might get a bit overwhelmed in the process

(I leaned into this more being a conversation rather than an official part 2, but im totally open to writing a part 2 if thats something people might want!! Also as for the convenience for where to talk abt this, im happy to just chat here, i dont mind!!) (though if you want anon it Would be a bit helpful if you chose like an emoji/identifier so ik its you if you send any future asks 😅)

[stormblessed95]

Storm hihihihihihi

The other day me and my friend had a whole debrief about jikook😭 and I mean hours long conversation but we also had other conversations in between and we talked about how they pretty much have nothing platonic going in between them, and how literally her words “they’re each others comfort place and they’re so comfortable with each other”, we also joked around about denying them because we were a bit jealous like imagine being young and in love and rich it’s wonderful obviously.

Well this is the part I wanted to mention honestly was when I brought up that (being eos comfort) I think jungkook may show signs of neurodivergence (specifically autism)(well I do believe he does since a lot of the things he’s done are traits of neurodivergency) and I don’t mean it in a bad way at all because well I too am neurodivergent but I don’t mean to try and diagnose him either because obviously only professionals can do that. But I kinda wanted to see your take on it (I’ve come to value your opinion quite a bit😭). I’ve also seen that jungkook possibly being neurodivergent is a topic that’s been discussed quite abit and have seen a lot of other neurodivergent people say they relate so much to him in terms of neurodivergency and I can say I am one of them too. So to my original point of this paragraph was that when I mentioned that to her <my friend> she was quite surprised and she also said it explained a few things about him and it made sense (in a non rude way) and I agreed but I also had this conversation with her because she also has a brother with severe autism and i too with a cousin who has really severe autism so I was familiar with these things based on being surrounded by it and personal experiences I go through but as someone with a lot less severe and mild symptoms. So eventually we got to the point where we discussed how people with autism have superfications on things they really really like and how they get so absorbed they tune everything out (a major sign of autism) she said that’s probably why he always watches jimin content and how he tends to constantly mention him, how he is always so fixated on jimin because he is a topic of interest and importance to him that he can go hours with watching his content and not move at all and how he constantly seeks him out for attention, comfort and play. (Jungkook had mentioned that he wouldn’t pay attention to comments during the 28.03.2023 live wanting to focus purely on jm and literally wanted us to watch him react to his baby) And when she mentioned that it was very fitting of him to have a fixation on someone he probably always sees and he values so highly but along with that he wants to show everyone that he supports jimin and he loves him and also wants people to know he does, whether anyone believes it’s romantic or not.

But I thought it was really cute and it melted my heart, I turned into a puddle of jikook joy😭

I've got neurodivergent siblings, a sibling with autism, a neurodivergent husband, a likely neurodivergent child and I'm neurospicy myself (those hyperfixations hit us all.... I say with a bts blog here and a book blog I should use more on the side) lol so yeah, I mean. I see it in Jungkook. It would make sense to me. It's something that gets mentioned every few months because it DOES make sense. Who knows if it's true or not. Only JK and those he would share it with. But I do see what you are saying. Also the rest of your little rant was adorable and so cute and I loved it. Your conversation with your friend sounds fun!

[shytastemakerthing]

If its alright, can I have a TWST matchup? Romantic and platonic if possible pls! Sorry if I overdid it I got a little anxious about what to put lol. Take your time and make sure to take care of yourself. 💙

I am about 5'6 with chest length brown hair that I am growing it out so I can do hairstyles with my sister. I'm nearsighted plus see double so I wear glasses. I have eczema on my arms. I am around 120 pounds and prefer wearing soft baggy gender neutral clothing. I normally look a tamed mess now a days cuz I'm at home 24/7 taking care of my grandma, but when going out I try to look "presentable".

I'm a Scorpio and my MBTI is INFJ-T. I am autistic so how I interact with people varies. Around people I don't really know I'm really quiet and polite, but towards people I don't like I tend to be more passive-aggressive and bitchy. I've had a few friends say that I'm terrifing when pissed off or if someone is being bigoted. I do know that I'm pretty quick to start a fight verbal or physical if my friends are being messed with. I do like to tease my family and friends a lot, but if I see I'm getting close to a boundary I try to pull back. With loved ones I'm overall just more comfortable with being a little silly.

I have pretty simple likes and dislikes. Like I love animals and have had various pets in the past as well as a dog right now. Drawing is one of my passions though I'm trying to get past my anxiety of showing people my art. I absolutely love to sing and I'm willing to listen to (almost) anything, but I love musicals more than anything. It's pretty easy for me to starting rambling about something I'm hyperfixated on then get a little embarrassed. I enjoy the cold more heat because I'm prone to heat strokes. Though exercising is difficult for me I love roller skating. My whole family loves video games so I grew up playing and really loving them. I have difficulties reading so I don't really enjoy it and use to hate it. I have a couple of fears like bug, clowns, and swimming. Sometimes talking is really hard for me cuz of my memory issues, slight lisp, and overall difficulty with pronuncing words, so I don't talk much and enjoy listen to people a lot more.

My love language is pretty evenly spread out, but I enjoy quality time with some sort of physical contact the most.

Varies health stuff that are unfortunately important about me: So, I was born without a sense of smell and with it food is very difficult for me. Most food looks very weird and gross to me, so I rely on texture the most with food. I do have fun making people skirm when they forget about my lack of smell though. I have a diagnosis for anxiety and memory issues, but my therapist agrees that I have more mental health related things. When I was young I had gotten myositis in my legs. Myositis is just muscle weakness caused by your immune system attacking your muscles. Symptoms come and go in episodes/flare ups so when I first got it I was in a wheelchair for six months. I still can't fully recover my leg strength so walking is still difficult if I do it too much.

Hello and thank you so much for this request! I hope that this match-up finds you well and I am so sorry as to how long it took for me to get this out to you! I hope that you enjoy it! I will do the romantic one first and as soon as I catch up on requests, I shall do the platonic!

Tw: None

I match you with...........

Jamil Viper

He is very much used to taking care of people (Kalim), and he has been doing it all of his life.... but it is different for you

Because you are his beloved partner

While he is forced to take care of Kalim, he takes care of you because he wants too

Is your eczema beginning to act up once more? (As someone who also has eczema, I understand this quite literal pain), he has the best remedies sent in from the Scalding Sands and will certainly help.

You don't know where he gets that lotion but by the sevens, the relief that you feel as he puts it on is unreal

With your lack of a sense of smell, he knows that this will certainly impact your food tastes and he will adjust accordingly

Jamil pays extra attention to how to react and respond to certain foods and will make adjustments to better suit your tastes, just so long as you are able to enjoy yourself

Another one who can't stand bugs (rather ironic for a man who grew up in what is basically a desert.... which is known for a lot of bugs), so good luck having some help when it comes to taking care of them

Okay.... if it is really small, he may try to squish it or something, but you have had to stop him more than once from lighting the thing on fire

You both enjoy whatever time it is that you are able to have with one another. He is usually quite busy, between taking care of Kalim, his club, duties as a vice hoursewarden, on top of his normal studies. But if you are both just able to be in the same room as one another, he certainly loves that

Speaking of his club, you are more than welcome to join him at the Basketball club. It's nice and air conditioned so you don't have to worry about getting too hot, and he loves that you come to see him

Overall, Jamil is a very attentive lover, doing what he had to be able to meet your needs and to ensure that you are well taken care of. He will continue to love and cherish you for as long as you allow him.

Thank you for your request!!

[marshmallowprotection]

Halo!! May I ask for a matchup? I’m autistic with a lot of other problems- and I’m sometimes very socially awkward, but I’m more “loud” online. I have a few special interests and a lot of hyperfixations. I'm a mixed race American Indonesian! I speak English and Indonesian, and I'm also currently trying to learn Korean! And my romantic orientation is Toric/Non-binary Loving Men!

My MBTI Type is INFJ/P and in general, I’m a quiet, creative, and caring person (and I get described as loyal too)! But I also sometimes push down my negative emotions and can be self deprivative, and I tend to have intrusive thoughts at times. I’d also describe myself as “too emotional” sometimes. I also am also the type of person to be straight to the point when describing things.

I have a few hobbies that I’ve stuck to throughout my whole life! Mainly art and writing, I’ve been doing that for a long time! Other more recent(ish) hobbies are plush making and tarot card reading! I’ve been wanting to learn an instrument but I usually drop it within a few weeks. Other than that, I don’t really have anything else to add. I hope that you have a good day! Drink water and have a good meal! :)

I match you with...

Jumin!

You're the kind of person who has a passion for creation. You love to make things with your hands and show off that work at the end of the day. These are the kind of things that make you who you are, a person who has a zest for life that wishes others could understand that there’s something special about the little things. You like to try new things, but it’s not always easy to get into them when you haven’t practiced. Skill is something that comes over time, but getting there is the tough part. You need someone in your life that understands how it is for you. With that in mind, Jumin seems like a good choice. 

Jumin can tend to miss the point and assume the plain meaning without knowing that there may be something underneath. He’s honest in the way he handles a lot of things in his life, and that would be comfortable for you. You would never have to second guess yourself. He doesn’t play mind games. He tells you how it is from the very beginning, and when you want someone to be with, you want to know that they’ll understand you, and you’ll be able to understand them. That’s the foundation of security. 

More than that, his love language is often tied into talking with each other. He loves to hear about the things you love! He could listen to you talk by the fire for hours if you could get away with it! He thinks it’s cute when you laugh, talking so fast and excitedly whenever you realize that he’s listening and he’s taking all of the information to heart. He never forgets when something means something to you. 

[theswarmanthology]

Anonymous (he/him), 26, Brooklyn, NY

"I follow some MCR fan blogs on tumblr and occasionally reblog things but I don't post much new content myself or interact with people there directly. I spend more time talking about MCR with my real life friends who are also fans."

Fast Facts:How long have you been a fan?: 9+ years Did you get to see MCR live before this tour?: Yes, I saw them before the breakup in 2013 How many shows on this tour did you attend in total?: 2-4 Favorite album: I don't have a favorite album Show experience out of 10: 9 Did you cry at your show?: No

Which date of the tour did you attend? 09/21/22, Prudential Center, Newark

When did you get your tickets for your show? Was it a struggle, or were they easy to grab? A few weeks before the show, via Stubhub. They were easy to get but crazy expensive

Did you attend with anyone else? I went with one of my closest friends and one of their friends who I hadn't met before, but we were in different sections

What did you wear? Full face of femme drag makeup, corset (equal parts for back support and for the aesthetic), lace fishnet top, miniskirt, skeleton tights, fake blood tears, converse

Where were your seats? Pit, Frank's side

What was your favorite song(s) from the setlist they played at your show? S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W, Vampires, Mama

What song were you most hoping to hear? Did you get to hear it? Demolition Lovers, and no, but I knew it was unlikely and that's okay

What was your favorite moment from the show? The My Way cover!

What was the most unexpected moment from the show? Also the My Way cover

Many fans describe seeing MCR live as feeling like coming home. Did you experience anything like that at your show? Not exactly. As a somewhat older fan, it was really lovely to see so many baby goths and baby gays having the time of their lives. As someone who does a lot of drag, seeing Gerard in the glam drag king look felt more like *they* were visiting *my* home (plus them literally coming home to NJ), not so much the other way around.

If you could change one thing about your show experience, what would it be? There were a lot of really pushy dudebros in the pit who had me genuinely fearing for my safety at the start, but I was able to move to a more chill part of the crowd. I am grateful that G kept stopping to make sure the audience was okay and telling people to back up.

Has your perspective or opinion about the band changed since seeing them on this tour? If so, in what way? They've been one of my favorite bands continuously since 2007, when I was 12 years old, but since following this tour (both online/via livestream and by going to 3 shows total) I've swung fully into hyperfixation and I'm aware of the fandom and the band's whole mythology in a way I never was before. Part of that is the sheer joy of seeing Gerard be so comfortably gender-nonconforming on stage, having come out as trans myself in the years since they broke up.

What advice would you give to people seeing My Chemical Romance in the future? Be safe! Don't try to get barricade unless you can handle a lot of physical stress! Seeing them from a few rows back in the pit is an equally incredible experience with much less potential for injury and having to be lifted out.

Thanks, Anonymous!

[aceofwhump]

Hi, Ace..... I needed to talk to someone and figure you were a good person to message.

There have been a handful posts going around the past months about how torture has become the current big whump community thing. ..... And how everyone isn't okay with it...... I'm starting to feel like I'm becoming more alienated from this community because I love torture. I love the traumatic ramifications of torture. That has always been my most-searched-for fanfiction type: "[charcter] tortured fanfic". I feel like this trope is the only ones that get bad-talked while none of the others do. I know and understand that everyone is entitled to their opinion, but.... I feel like I'm being told I can't write about/post/reblog things I actually enjoy ie torture and conditioning tropes.

My current hyperfixation is anime so I'm spending more time on my Anime blog versus my whump one, but I'm starting to feel like deleting my whump blog because clearly what I enjoy isn't "okay" in the community anymore.

Help me, Ace-wan Kenobi. You're my only hope.

~youralienatedwhumper

First of all I want to give you a massive hug so here!!

I'm so so sorry this all has made you feel so alienated and unwelcome to the point where you're thinking about deleted your whump blog. That's awful and I am so sorry. If you feel that's what you need to do then you should do whatever will make you the most happy and comfortable. But I promise you, you are welcome! I know it may not feel like it at times especially when these kinds of discussions start up again, but you absolutely belong here!

I have seen a lot of those discussions as well and I was afraid of this. Of people feeling just like how you feel. I've been trying to decide how I feel and if I should join in on them or not. Here is my perspective on the whole thing and maybe this will help.

A lot of what I'm getting from those discussions is that some members of the community see tons and tons of torture and dark stuff with no comfort and they then think that comfort has no place in the community because they don't see it. You, and others like you, see these discussions and now think you're not welcome because you like little to no comfort and enjoy lots of torture.

The community tends to go through times where certain tropes seem to be more popular than others but that doesn't make them any better or worse than other tropes nor does it mean that it's the only thing allowed.

I think a lot of people in the community lately have gotten confused and concerned that they don't belong here because of what they like. People are trying to settle on a definitive answer on what qualifies as "whump" and that discussion seems to happen all the time here. But there is not set "this is whump" "this is not whump" and there will never be.

I also think that people feel that things like torture, slavery, dehumanization and bbu, because they're so present, are overshadowing other things like environmental whump, accidents, sickfics, emotional comfort etc. People are concerned that the genre of whump is narrowing too far into becoming solely those types of fics and pushing out all the others to the point thst mew members think that's all thst whump is.

I'm not saying anyone is right or wrong. I'm just saying this seems to be how people are feeling based on the discussions I'm reading.

So I think it's less of "we hate these things and they should go away!" And more of a "okay this isn't my thing but I can't find content for the tropes I like and it makes me sad." Which has then turned into "oh no what I like isn't welcome here?"

Whump is so many things. So, so so SO many things. And they are ALL welcome. We all like different things and it comes down to curating your dashboard to fit the things you like. If you like torture, then fill your dash with blogs who post torture. If you like more comfort, find those we post more comfort. Everyone is allowed to post and talk about the things they enjoy.

I also want to say to everyone that if you want that content then people need to make it and support those who do create it. Write the stuff you love. Reblog the stuff you love.

For example, I tend to not be the biggest fan of bbu or hardcore conditioning so I just don't follow those who post a lot of it. Simple. But that doesn't mean it isn't amazing and a part of this community! Because it is and there are so many wonderful bloggers who post such great content for it!

My dear nonny, you are WELCOME in this community!!! What you feel is valid! What you love is valid and 100% a huge part of this community!! We love torture! We love the emotional ramifications of torture! Me personally, it's one of my favorites!!! I too spend tons of time searching for torture fics on AO3.

YOU. ARE. NOT. ALONE.

I am here to tell you and everyone else that reads that BOTH SIDES ARE WELCOME!!!! BOTH ARE CONSIDERED WHUMP AND ARE WELCOMED IN THE COMMUNITY!!!!

Those who love dark stuff!! Those who love lots of comfort!! And everyone in between!!

YOU ARE ALL A PART OF THIS COMMUNITY AND WE LOVE YOU!!!!

I will continue to say this until my face turns blue if I have to.

EVERYONE IS WELCOME IN THE WHUMP COMMUNITY

ALL TROPES ARE WELCOME IN THE WHUMP COMMUNITY

IF YOU THINK IT'S WHUMP,  IT'S WHUMP

Curate your dashboard to reflect what you love. Block tags that make you uncomfortable. Support the creators who makes things you like by reblogging their work for others to see. Be kind to those who like what you don't. Create and write whatever makes you happy. And remember that whump is a wide genre full of so many things and all are welcome.

[masked-puppetmaster]

hey, i saw you asked a while ago why dream & techno apologists are apologists for those characters (and you liked a bunch of my posts concerning that, actually) i was wondering if you still have any more questions - and also i wanted to ask if you wanted to talk a bit about c!tommy and what makes you like him so much? like is it just the emotional attachment to him? is it the trauma? anything specific about the way in which he is written? i've always watched his pov & i'm very curious! / - red

yo yo yo hey! I think I understand it a bit more now, for the dream & techo apologists, I think I’m still a bit confused when it comes to technoblade. I see a lot about people only using him as a weapon/ him not being able to trust people / no one sticking up for him and I’m not sure where it comes from? In all fairness, I only know him as the guy who executed Tubbo / spawned withers but im assuming that’s in large part because I came into the story so late (iirc I didn’t really get into the dsmp until around doomsday, and I got most information of past events just by like. osmosis or reading wikis) so I might simply just not have enough information on techno to get it. Like, he executed Tubbo under a lot of pressure iirc but that doesn’t take away from the fact he did execute him? or things with the withers, I know technoblade doesn’t like the government and I’d go as far as to say he has a point, but was it really necessary to destroy lmanburg (iirc, multiple times). I know he was mad, but I feel like he shouldn’t have taken in that far, like from what I see and understand it’s like yes he had his points but he hurt people and doesn’t seem to care that he hurt anybody, just kinda stands there assuming he’s right about everything and not rlly looking at the situation from anyone else’s perspective. That being said like I said I came into the story really late and so my arguments might be able to be chalked up to just a lack of proper context, and even if I’m kinda annoyed at Technoblade’s behavior I still like him as a character & when techno does stream I enjoy the content so I’m not like a technoblade hater or anything I just don’t see why people can be apologists for him bcos from my pov he’s just kind of hurt people and not taken any personal responsibility for it (I mean this as in acknowledging to himself he was ever in the wrong; ex. The whole Tommy / techno betrayal situation which I think was a p complicated matter to be fair he just keeps saying over and over how Tommy betrayed him and it doesn’t seem to me like he’s even bothering to look at the situation from Tommy’s pov or rlly reflect on his own actions at all)

I just rlly like Tommy! I think at least some part of it can be chalked up to Tommy being the first streamer I watched in the dsmp and one of the ones I watch the most from (half the time I’m watching the dsmp it’s a Tommy stream) so there’s just gonna be some inherent bias towards him there like there is with literally any of these streamers. As you put it, it is kinda the trauma, haha. trauma and emotional attachment lol. I think part of it is I relate to him a lot, and I can see where he’s coming from on a lot of things, and I also just like the way his character is written. Smthn abt him that people have pointed out is that his trauma isn’t pretty and romanticized it’s ugly and yk he acts out and all that, which I appreciate. I can see where he’s coming from on a lot of things or at least understand why he thinks the way he does. I like seeing him learn and grow I like seeing his arcs both personally with himself and with other people. He’s an interesting and complex character and he’s been through a lot and I think it’s just super interesting to see how what he’s gone though affects his mental state and his actions as a character, like just from like a mental analysis standpoint there’s a lot to talk about which I think is pretty cool. this isn’t to say that he’s never fucked up or done anything wrong, because he has, but to be fair so has everyone else on this server I don’t think there’s a single member of the server who’s done nothing wrong (except maybe like. Charlie. Charlie my beloved). He’s made his mistakes but every good character fucks up that’s what makes them a good character is their flaws and so with the ways that he’s messed up and the ways he’s hurt people I’m an apologist because I can see why he acts that way, where the feelings and actions are coming from and I can forgive him for it because I understand the why. Also I just think the punishments he’s received for his actions are rlly unfair, easy ex with exile he did something many people on the server have already done at one point or another and was exiled and mentally broken down over it and rlly it’s just been like one thing after another and even if he’s made mistakes he gets way more harshly punished than I think was fair. I’ve seen people talk about how annoying and selfish his character is and when I read the posts (not all of them, there’s a nice chunk of people who are civil about it) it just seems like they’re not rlly thinking abt his character and his experiences. I’ll see people explain his signs of trauma and say it’s annoying because it’s not soft crying trauma it’s messy acting out trauma which it’s just like you do not understand this at all, do you? Or with the discs, I’ll be honest with you here. I will defend Tommy’s attachment to these stupid little music discs till the day I die. Why can’t he have his discs? They’re his , they’re not even that valuable outside of the fact that they’re his, why can’t he have things? why isn’t he aloud to have items he’s attached to without someone taking them for the sole reason of he likes them. And all I see is people saying he is selfish and cares about the discs more than people, which is literally disproven in the rp. Ranboo flat out says he’s not selfish, when Tommy takes the blame for George’s house (also keeping in mind here tommy and ranboo barely knew each other at the time, and if Tommy was actually selfish he could’ve very easily dragged Ranboo down with him) and when it comes to the discs he’s given up the discs multiple times in favor of helping other people (he gave them up for lmanburg, and then for Tubbo I think twice actually) and the one time he told someone the discs were worth more than they were, that was the moment yeah made him realize he didn’t like who he was becoming and he immediately backtracked and allowed the disc to be handed over. TL;DR he’s not selfish he’s just got a lot of strong attachments and his attachments are both his greatest strength and his greatest weakness. And he’s a kid, he’s been though a lot of things, he’s got a lot of trauma he’s dealing

with and it’s not always pretty but he gets better, he has his arcs and he gets better and learns from some of his actions, and I think looking at him and his yk. Timeline and character development and arcs and his whole like mental deal and just general character choices are super interesting and I find it fun, as someone who enjoys character analysis, and all in all I love him I relate to him in some ways and some of it also might just be emotional attachment and bias towards him as Tommy being one of my comfort streamers

& it’s fully possible someone could have just as much of an argument for c!techno, my deal w looking at c!tommy making mistakes and c!techno making mistakes and being able to be an apologist for Tommy and not for techno is more about me understanding tommy’s character better and understand the reasoning and the why behind the things he says and does, vs. techno who i dont really get and i can’t be an apologist for him if I don’t understand anything hes doing or why he’s doing it and then seeing him over and over dismiss other peoples perspectives and never rlly reflecting on himself (not to say Tommy couldn’t use at least a little of that himself- I am Looking over at his relationship w Jack Manifold lol) can be kinda frustrating but as I said earlier that might just be me not knowing all the proper context

I could probably write more about Tommy especially when it comes to the whole technoblade vs Tommy thing but this post is already way longer than you probably ever wanted to read so I’ll stop now I’m sorry I’m just hyperfixated haha and yk if anyone wants to like add arguments or points or if you or someone rlly likes technoblade or dream or whoever and wants to talk to me about that go ahead I encourage that like I rlly enjoy having those conversations w ppl provided theyre civil abt it bc like we’ve all said a million times over before eveyone in the dsmp is an unreliable narrator and you’re just going to automatically have a bias towards a character if you watch their POV most and all that so. Yk I am a tommy apologist but I watch his streams most and I’m also just emotionally attached so anything I can say has to be taken w a grain of salt bcos I’m biased towards his character

[with-love-anu]

okay hellooo i'm this anon.

you said i could talk so here i am... you know, i will not talk about my hyperfixations because i think you'll understand who i am (hint: i'm a mutual of yours) and i think i dont want you to know, at least not right now. i have been wanting to send you an ask like this since a few days but it keeps slipping out my mind. i jad a pretty shitty evening today plus ihave a ptm tomorrow where i'll get to know my marks for the first school exams of 11th grade. i dont think i am very nervous (maybe bc i have convinced myself that i'm going to get horrible marks). i just cant seem to fall asleep. the past few weeks have been hard, not in the sense that they are problematic (like intrusive thoughts and the like), but that i just wanna sleep all day, i dont feel like working or attending classes i usually loved. things just seem bland. a freind of mine who was suicidal hasn't responded in about 24 hours and i'm... worried to say the least. i just hope she's alright.

but, enough about me. are you alright? do you feel okay, good even? when do you go to bed? frankly, i feel jealous of the 💀 anon ciz they are soo good at conversations. ofc it isn't my place to feel jealous but okay. i.. have been thinking about it, and can i call you my friend? it... feels kinda forward and i hope you're not offended. tell me if you feel triggered by anything I've mentioned and I'll stop. thanks for being there <3.

~ 🌔

hiiii!

it's alright with whatever you're comfortable with- i'm glad you sent this ask in ;D

I think you're dealing with a lot rn. Grade 11 is hard as it is and I cannot comprehend what it must be like to take online classes for it (or even if they're offline rn, I don't think things must be same as school before all this covid shit). Just,, take a deep breath and remember it's going to be okay. Even if you fail at certain subjects- it's alright it's normal, trust me- even tho it hurts like a bitch and parents are never the ones to understand.

I think what might help you rn is to create a study group. Maybe even of 3-4 people. If the schools are still online- make a whole discord chat room (whatever you're comfortable with) and just hold maybe voice/video study session calls. Or if it's offline, maybe you can stay for some time after school- (our school allowed that.) The more you interact with people who are going through the same thing as you, the better you'll feel. Discuss questions and stuff, what all of you are struggling with.

Another thing that helped me were yt video lectures (I listened to them at 0.5-1.5x speed to keep myself concentrated). Listen to someone that actually makes you like those subjects again- one of the major reasons (except being alone) that makes you lose interest are shitty teachers. Maybe this list would help as well.

She would be alright I'm sure :( Maybe call to check up if it becomes too much?

I'm alright yes! Just constantly in and out- since I'm free, I try to find out any and all stuff I can do. Been trying to write but somehow reader insert is not making me happy as it used to? Dk, my emotions are a mess and I think it shows in my works. givufnubuhgvijn you're great at conversing dw🤗 nah nope you my friend now🔫

I'm not triggered at all rn! take care okay? i hope you have a better day than you expected!!

[yoursummerfrost]

Would you be willing to talk about your writing process? How many drafts you go through, how early on you run something by a beta, do you outline or not, etc.? I'm really curious to get a feel for how folks write!

Sure!! Not sure how coherent this will be but let's see lol. Also you'll notice that certain pieces vary a lot. Writing process under the cut! 

Getting an idea: Most of the time, I get my fic ideas from either songs or random conversations with friends, and they're typically a sort of precipitating event or premise that leads to a character exploration. (Examples: What if Geralt was a ghost haunting Jaskier's house? What if Dan actually stayed for that drink Lucifer offered him?) But sometimes I look for a plot on purpose (e.g., I had been DYING to write a time loop for literal years before I finally worked out how I wanted it to look by brainstorming ways to subvert the conventions w/in the trope). 

It's hard to like, delineate this tho because in reality it's sort of messy and mushed bc of how my brain works. Like, the truer to life approximation of deciding to write and yet so far from death was more like: receiving comfort as the reminder you are lacking it -> ooh ghost love story as ultimate yearning -> who would be more fun to write as a ghost? -> Jaskier as ghost = inversion of dynamic / Geralt as ghost = extension of dynamic -> Geralt as ghost sounds fun -> why would Jaskier be stuck in a house with a ghost? -> he's retiring from a life on the road -> what Jaskier is lacking is permanence/stability -> ghost story as paradox of permanence and impermanence -> okay but on the plot level what would happen if Geralt was haunting Jaskier's house?

Outlining: I usually start writing without formalizing an outline, just to get a feel for the story itself, but I tend to have an idea for the major beats/the thesis statement living amorphously in my brain. Then partway thru the fic I type out an actual outline tracking major occurrences and functions of scenes; occasionally I'll write a whole fic without an outline tho, especially if it's shorter (<16k).

Drafting/Editing: I do somewhere between 1.5 and 2 drafts, depending on how you define a distinct draft ig? I've never completely rewritten a whole story like some schools of writing suggest, but I will definitely go back and make edits. I usually self-edit as I go and then do a full re-read/edit at the end of draft completion. For the as-you-go stuff, I typically re-read everything I wrote the day before which helps both 1) get me into the mood for writing again and 2) make any small tweaks etc + catch typos. When I do the big edit at the end, I try to change something about how I physically read the draft (e.g. read on computer instead of phone, change the font) which helps shake up my brain I guess?

Betaing: I am deeply spoiled by my friends and endlessly grateful for them, lol. At minimum, I like having someone I can excitedly flail about my ideas with while I'm writing (usually multiple someones) and talk through stuff that might be stumping me (e.g. idk if it would be funnier if X or Y happened, hey do you think vampires can feel the cold), and then someone--often the same person but not always--do a full read-through after the fic is done. A lot of times, especially for longer stuff or when I'm feeling down on myself, I'll ask someone to beta and/or cheerread along with me while I write. And I bug them with lots of questions like "Is this landing for you? Do I need to slow down the dialogue here? Am I funny even a little bit?" and they offer feedback and/or encouragement. But also sometimes I get impatient and/or cannot tolerate concrit so I just fling it into the void without beta lol

Other stuff: it's also worth noting that I daydream about my projects constantly? Showering/laying in bed before or after sleep/driving places is all prime fic plotting time. If I'm listening to music, whatever song I'm listening to will probably become related to a fic. This isn't like, a conscious ~dedication~ thing: it's pure, unadulterated neurodivergent hyperfixation. Also, I rarely read other people's fic if I'm writing any of my own, bc for me the writing and reading circuits are quite different, but I re-read/re-watch the source material a lot.

I do also re-read my own fic a decent amount, partly because I genuinely enjoy my own writing and partly because I like noticing my own trends/recurring themes/etc which is easier to do if you take in your work later, at more of a distance. Reading people’s comments about what they enjoyed is also helpful, because it gives me a sense of what things land and what things don’t (or don’t get commented on as being a stand-out, at least). I don’t enjoy getting concrit outside of beta I’ve specifically asked for, but I very much enjoy hearing what people did like so I can do more of it.

Titling/Summaries: Usually I come up with a title partway through writing based on a song I've found to take inspiration from. I get really excited when I find a title, lol. I hate summaries very much except for when I love them? I semi-recently converted to the school of using a snappy quote from the fic to make the summary, which makes my job easier lol. I usually like picking quotes that are 1) relatively brief, 2) encapsulate the tone of the fic, and 3) not huge spoilers. Sometimes I'll write a line and go, "yup, that's gonna be the summary," which is fun.

[thequintessentialqueer]

I've suspected that I'm on the spectrum for a while but feel weird about self diagnosing and talking to my friends about it and was wondering if you would mind talking about your personal experience with self diagnosis? Also how debilitated must a person be to have this? And can the amount they are debilitated vary depending on what else they're coping with and still be valid?

I’m formally diagnosed as ADHD-I and suspected to be on the autism spectrum, but not officially diagnosed. I was diagnosed as ADHD after fifteen hours of testing. they also said they had considered autism spectrum disorder as a second diagnosis, as my childhood profile matched perfectly. the reason they ruled it out? well, ADHD and autism have a lot of overlap in symptoms and traits, so they wanted to treat my ADHD before diagnosing anything else. okay, fair. ADHD and autism are very frequently comorbid, but fine. I can accept that. but their other reason? “you write poetry and have an interest in activism. those are not typical for people with autism, as they require abstract thinking and empathy.” here’s my take: if the only reason I wasn’t diagnosed as autistic is because my special interests/hyperfixations aren’t fucking stereotypes (because contrary to popular belief, autistic people are human beings with varied interests and passions…….who knew???), I can confidently say that those reasons are terrible. if those are the only things that prevented the diagnosis for a disorder I otherwise match perfectly, well, then I AM autistic. their reasons were outdated, ignorant, and uninformed. I have many autistic friends who share my interests and my commitment to activism: they are valid, and so am I. and so are you. the thing about diagnosis is that regardless of whether you do it, or your family doctor does it, or a specialist does it, it all comes down to examining your history and experiences and matching them to a list of traits that are frequently shared by people with that label. there’s no magic to it. there’s no trick. it’s just asking “do you experience this?” “has this happened to you?” “do you think about this in this way?” and answering honestly. there are definitely benefits to formal diagnosis. being diagnosed as ADHD means I can access medication that helps me manage my symptoms and exist more comfortably and well within a world that wasn’t designed for me. but with autism, I was never looking for a treatment. I don’t want to be medicated or cured. I don’t want to be put through abusive therapy designed to make me act allistic. learning about autism on my own terms and finding community online helped me fill in the gaps in my life and work through the shame and discomfort and humiliation that I grew up with. it gave me affirmation, coping strategies, and people who I could relate to. for me, that was all I needed, and I didn’t need a doctor to diagnose me in order to access it. sometimes formal diagnosis is necessary to access the help you need, but if that’s not what you’re looking for, and you can’t or don’t want to go through the diagnostic process (where unfortunately you’re very likely to encounter a lot of ignorance and ableism), you don’t have to put yourself through that. you know yourself. you’ve done the research. you exist in an age where all of medical knowledge is a click away, and if all you want is a word for how your brain operates, and a community of people who get you, well, then welcome! you’re here! you’ve found it! and yes, circumstances will have an impact on how debilitating your symptoms can be. I know that with my ADHD, I have much worse symptoms when I’m sleep deprived, hungry, stressed, etc. it’s also understood that environmental factors have a huge impact (upbringing, family life, education, support systems, etc). I was raised by very disorganized, chaotic parents (one of whom is now diagnosed as ADHD as well, and the other who is considering seeking diagnosis): as such, my biggest struggles are with tidiness, planning, time management, etc. at the same time, my mum’s realization that I was very unusual, and her choice to home-educate me to spare me from bullying and being made to feel like a failure in an academic environment had a hugely positive impact on me. she nurtured my special interests, helped me follow my passions, didn’t force me to do things that made me miserable (even including eating foods that gave me sensory issues: to this day, she always makes sure to cook me something she knows I can eat without being distressed!), and affirmed my worth in every possible way. a lot of adhd and autistic (and otherwise neurodivergent) kids grow up with very low self-esteem because they’re made to feel inferior within a system that wasn’t built for them. I know with adhd in particular, the drop-out rates, alcohol and drug abuse rates, incarceration rates, etc are very high compared to non-adhd people. I credit my academic success in my late teens and adulthood to my mum; if I had been in school my whole life, I wouldn’t have believed in myself and the results could have been catastrophic. what is disabling in one situation can be an asset in another; yes, ADHD and ASD come with impairments and challenges. sometimes really fucking huge ones. but a lot of the things that we struggle with are socially constructed and enforced, not innate to us. we live in a society that demands that we work and/or go to school full time; that we hold a job in order to survive; that we focus on and do things that don’t interest us; that we be able to socialize based on very specific parameters; that we constrict our emotions in public and only express them in ways that are considered acceptable to neurotypicals. we live in a world that is not designed for our brains, and that world makes our impairments disabling/debilitating. anyway, massively long response just to say that self-diagnosis is valid. I would still recommend getting some kind of counselling or therapy if you’re able to, just because growing up autistic or otherwise neurodivergent comes with a lot of pain, and it can really help to work through it with someone whose job it is to listen. (just keep in mind that there are a LOT of awful therapists out there and you should never stay with one who you don’t feel you can trust or talk to. the first thing my old therapist told me when I met her was that if I didn’t feel like she was the right fit for me, I could make an appointment with someone else and she wouldn’t be hurt at all, because it’s about my wellbeing above all else). at the end of the day, this is about your wellbeing. so if autism as a word feels like home, you’re home. find others like you and share with each other the joys and the pains of having this kind of brain. look for resources online. figure out what works for you and what doesn’t. use this knowledge and this identity to try to create a life for yourself that isn’t always hurting you.