#‘day 3? but you made that post last thursday-‘ I may have missed a couple days okay 😭

[hella1975]

day three of stretches and i almost stuck my foot behind my head 😍

[interlunium-opus]

"I hate him spending time with you more than I hate running so you know, priorities." [ Jay. ]

[ Jay | fluff ]

Author’s Note: Here's a fluff in response to the following request "Can you maybe do a fluff/crack for Jay where maybe he felt a little jealous when you praised someone for their skill and he immediately goes competitive mode and openly tries to show how he's far better indirectly to the guy?" Hope it's close to what you have in mind and hope you like it :3

“Do you have anything to explain to me?”

You jumped, startled, as Jay appeared beside you while you were busy shoving your textbooks into your locker, “Jay! What did I say about sneaking up on people?”

“And what did I say about not keeping secrets between us?” Jay snapped back, arms crossed, brows raised, “Is this how much our friendship is worth?”

“My goodness, what is it this time?” You sighed as he fished his phone out of his pocket, turning it to show you a candid picture of you and Sunghoon from last night.

“I mean seriously, of all people to date, you have to go for this pretentious prick?” Jay scoffed before gesticulating wildly, “Look, I know I said that you need to stop being aromantic and start planting some sort romantic interest somewhere — but Sunghoon is just ain't it. In fact ! I’d rather you date the spawn of the devil, Jungwon, instead.”

You snorted a laugh before shaking your head dismissively, “Dude, we were just running last night okay? Does that even look like a date to you?”

“Okay,” he repeated sarcastically, “but you love running alone! So why are you suddenly running with someone — and not just anyone but this prick???”

“I really don’t get why you two hate each other so much,” you raised an eyebrow at Jay, “Look we just happened to bump into each other last night and since we were heading the same way, he asked if I don’t mind him tagging along for the remainder of the way — no big deal.”

“Ughh, that’s the oldest trick in book,” Jay scrunched his face, “And you said yes?”

“I mean — we’re not exactly strangers, we have been in the same tutorial class together for more than a year now," you mumbled as you zip your bag up, "He's a good running partner too. His pace was so stable and steady that it made me stuck to mine as well — I mean, duh, he's an athlete after all."

"Hey, I can run well too," Jay grumbled defensively, "You know if you needed a running partner, you could've called me right?"

“Maybe if you were as fit as I am, she would have,” Sunghoon suddenly appeared beside Jay, peering over his shoulder to look at the picture on his phone, “That’s a good picture of me and y/n — no wonder you got jealous.”

“Speak of the devil,” Jay rolled his eyes, “Aren't you a bit too greedy over what I have? first, you took up my spot for the dance competition and now you're trying to make a move on my girl."

"Jay, that was 2 years ago — get over it. You've taken my spot afterwards for the Summer competition anyway so we're actually even," Sunghoon retorted, "Also, she's not your girlfriend anyway so your territorial behaviour is pretty misplaced."

"Guys, cut it out," you shut your locker close with extra force in an effort to shut the squabbles, "Also, why am I suddenly dragged into your petty fights."

"Right sorry about that, he's just always trying to pick a fight with me," Sunghoon shook his head dismissively before turning to you and beamed, "Just stopping by to ask if you're running again tonight 'cause I would love to join again. It’s off season for ice-skating so I thought it's the perfect time to get back to running again."

“Oh? Yeah I am going tonight as well, just a tad bit late in the evening though. I want to finish up some work at the library first,” you smiled back at Sunghoon, ignoring Jay’s burning stare, “You know you can start ahead if you want — don’t want you waiting too long in case I'll take too much time at the library.”

“I’ll go when you go, don’t worry,” he reassured as he backed away, joining Heeseung who was waiting for him, “I’ll text you alright? Looking forward to tonight!”

You nodded and waved at him before turning to Jay, “What?”

“That’s it,” Jay clasped his hands together, “I’ll run with you tonight — and the next.”

“Jay, don’t be ridiculous, you hate running,” you emphasized, “which is why I never asked you to run with me.”

“Hey — I can love running if it’s for you,” he winked, wrapping an arm over your shoulders, dragging you past the crowded hallway towards your next class, “Or let me paraphrase: I hate him spending time with you more than I hate running so you know, priorities.”

“your priorities are all skewed then," you clicked your tongue, "Well, as long as you don't hurt yourself."

_________________________________________________________________________

The next morning however Jay did not show up in Modern Political Thought seminar that you guys have every Thursday morning. Though the guy is such a sleepyhead, he never misses a class even when he pulled up an all-nighter the night before. So this sudden absence, paired with the fact that he managed to run a whole 5km without stopping last night, was sowing seeds of suspicions and guilt within you. To make things worse, he did not even respond to any of your messages for the last 5 hours.

That was why you ended up being in front of Jay's apartment instead of having your lunch that noon. "Hi!" you immediately say as the door of Jay's apartment opened. It was Jake, his flatmate, with his lids only half-opened and hair all disheveled, "y/n?"

"Sorry for waking you up Jake," you smiled apologetically, "Is Jay home? He missed a Politics seminar this morning and he didn’t respond to my text at all — just wanna make sure he’s alright.”

“mmhmm, pretty sure he’s in," he answered drowsily before yawning, "but probably, still hibernating.”

“Oh okay, do you mind if I come in?”

Jake nodded, backing up as he held the door open, “Of course, come in — it’s messy though.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you reassured, making your way towards the room at the end of the hallway. As you knocked on his door, Jake suddenly shouted from the kitchen, “don’t bother knocking y/n — that guy sleeps like a log. Just go in.”

“Uhh…” you bit your lip, slightly hesitating but relented when your subsequent knocks yielded no answer.

“Jay? I’m entering okay?” you say as you let yourself in, carefully navigating around the dark room, stumbling a few times against some random furnitures.

"Jake, get out okay-" you hear him grumble from underneath the covers, tossing the other way, "just let me... sleep mo..re."

As you neared his bed, you reached over to his bedside table and turned on the lamp. Suddenly, Jay rose from the covers, his hand gripping your wrist, grunting "Jake what did I just say-"

Trailing off, he looked at you with brows furrowed in a mix of annoyance and confusion, before his expressions gradually soften "y/n?"

"dude, you almost gave me a heart attack," you muttered, sighing exasperatedly.

"Sorry, I thought it was Jake trying to disturb me again," he softened his grip and rubbed your wrist as if he had just hurt it, "Did I hurt you?"

"My heart, almost but my hand is fine," you pulled your hand away, "How about you?"

"What about me?"

"You missed class this morning," you crossed your arms.

"It's just one class, no big deal. I just overslept-"

"Is that all?" you raised an eyebrow before pointing at the crumpled muscle relief patch packs and pain relief creams strewn messily across his bedside table, "Did someone overexert himself last night?"

"Fine, I didn't come to class partly because my legs are sore," he shrugged, "but hey, I ran as much as Sunghoon did! Aren't you proud of me?"

"Not if it's at the cost of your legs!" you replied exasperatedly, "Come on, where is the rational Jay that I know? he wouldn't have let his competitiveness and ego cloud his judgements like this."

"It's just normal post-workout sore, I've had it a couple of times before," he reassured, "Also, I may hate running. But I'm actually good at HIIT and strength training so I'm not all that unfit as you think I am. Or he thinks."

"All that just so you can prove him wrong?"

"No of course not, I couldn't care less about him," he huffed, "I just wanted you to know that I can pace well with you too."

"Jay, that does not make it any better-"

"Probably also to convince you that I make a better running partner than Sunghoon," he sniggered.

"Well, guess what, you can't run if your legs are hurt," you quipped.

"Oh shit, that's true," he muttered under his breath, "Well post-workout sore usually last between 3-7 days so I'll be good as new after that. Running partners?" he stretched his hand out as if asking for a handshake.

You sighed, grabbing his outstretched hand, shaking it as if you guys are signing on a pact, "Only if you promise not to overexert yourself next time."

"Promise," his smile widened, "Have you had lunch? I'll cook something up for you."

"Your legs are hurt though."

"They're sore not hurt," Jay emphasized, scooting to the edge of his bed, "Also even if they are hurt, I cook with my hands not legs so..."

You chuckled, "Well sir, if you insists."

"Of course, wouldn't let my girl go out of this house famished," he wrapped an arm over your shoulder, grinning gleefully.

[raindancer2004]

House Rules

Word Count: 2,241 Demetri x reader Oneshot Warnings: Fluff, a little NSFW

The idea for this one came from a post of @wallwriterstuff​ & the conversation that followed with @volturidoll13​

Demetri met Y/N when he met Gianna after one of the Art classes, she took on a Thursday night. Aro didn’t like the idea of Gianna walking home alone in the dark and had asked Demetri to go meet her. He knew Y/N was his mate the moment he saw her; his throat burned at the smell of her blood but the need to taste her was overruled by his desire to protect her. Y/N was attracted to him the moment she saw him. He had given her a warm smile and his voice had made her weak in the knees. He walked her home that night too; in fact, every Thursday night he walked Y/N home before he and Gianna continued on their way to the castle.

Demetri had taken Y/N out on a few dates before telling her that he was a vampire and she was his mate, his one true love “So you mean I’m the key to your ‘happily ever after’?” She asked and he chuckled “Yes, exactly” He replied smiling at her “Ooh I don’t know Demetri…forever is such a long time. What if I get bored of you?” He knew she was teasing him but feigned offense anyway, his hand going to his unbeating heart “You wound me, Y/N” She laughed a little “I’m sure someone as old and strong as you will survive” She gave him a wink, he growled low and replied “I would never get bored of you nor would I ever allow you to get bored of me” One of his hands moved up her thigh, his little finger brushed her clothed centre as he nibbled her ear before placing a kiss below it, she bit her lip to supress a moan escaping them. He smiled against her skin “I can’t wait till you’re beneath me and I can hear all those little noises you’re going make whilst I’m inside you” He whispered “Me neither…but I don’t have sex on a third date” She whispered back “You’re sure about that? I can tell you’re aroused” He replied low “You’re not playing fair…Vampire” She breathed the last word and tapped his nose “I never said I would sweetheart” He kissed her cheek “Come on. I’ll take you home” He added and helped her with her coat.

A month later Demetri moved Y/N into the castle with him, excited that he was finally getting to live with his mate. Y/N was amazed by the size of Demetri’s quarters and liked the natural colour scheme of the room, a blood red rug in front of the fireplace accentuated the room.

“I need to discuss some things with you now that you’re living with me” Demetri said taking her hands in his “Ok, I’m all ears” She smiled at him “House rules; 1. Every other Wednesday between 12 and 2pm, please do not leave our quarters as it’s ‘tour’ day. The next ‘tour’ is this Wednesday” “Ahh, yes. Human take out day. I’ll be sure to stay here” She replied “2. Please do not leave the castle without me or Gianna with you. I need to know you’re safe” She nodded “Only the two rules?” She teased “3. Trouserless Tuesdays, where pants are optional” Demetri says, winking at her “By optional you mean it’s negotiable?” She asked “No. It’s not negotiable. As I said pants are optional on Trouserless Tuesdays” He smiled at her and she shook her head “You’re terrible” “Maybe, but I’m all yours” He replied and kissed her.

“Are you ready for family movie night?” Demetri called out “Yep. Whenever you are” She replied walking out of the walk-in closet dressed in her ‘Tinkerbell’ pyjamas and a pair of Giraffe slippers “What the F…” He trails off as he eyes her from head to toe “Are you wearing those downstairs?” “If you don’t accept me wearing my Disney pyjamas and giraffe slippers, then I’ve agreed to be railed by the wrong vampire for all eternity” She responded, Demetri’s mouth dropped open in shock. He shook his head and moved to stand in front of her “I accept you, no matter what you wear mi amore” He replied and captured her lips in a sweet kiss. “So, what’s this about agreeing to be railed by a vampire for all eternity?” He asked, one eyebrow raised “I thought that was part of the ‘mate’ package you offered me. Was I wrong?” She replied looking up at him through her lashes as she took her bottom lip between her teeth. He growled low and deep, his thumb removing her lip from her teeth as he captured her lips with his in a passionate kiss. “You weren’t wrong, I just don’t remember using that phrase” “Well, you are getting on a bit. I hear memory problems are common with the…ancient” She whispered the last word, teasing him again. He chuckled and scooped her up and put her over his shoulder and slapped her ass “Ooh” He dropped her carefully onto the bed and climbed on top of her, propping his weight on his elbows and rolled his hips against her, the button of his jeans rubbing her clit. “You should respect your elders, young one” He replied and kissed her again “And if I don’t?” She bit his bottom lip “I could make you” He bit her lip in return “That sounds like it could be fun…oh ancient one” She replied smiling at him “Is that my new nickname?” “Yep, seeing as you called me young one” “You started it sweetheart” He smiled and rolled off her and kissed her cheek “We’ll finish this later” He said and smacked her ass as she got off the bed “Counting on it” She turned and blew him a kiss.

He went into the closet to change into a pair of lounge pants and a t-shirt. “Come on movie night’s about to start and you old people have trouble staying awake the later it gets” She called over her shoulder, smirking “Kids today. They have no respect. I blame the parents” He retorted with a smirk on his own.

He took her hand in his and they made their down to the family room ready for movie night “What are those on your feet?” Felix asked shocked as Y/N and Demetri sat beside him on the sofa “Felix meet Eddie and Annie” She replied and wiggled her feet, Felix laughed “Y-you named th-them?” “Don’t laugh at her” Demetri warned him “But she named her slippers D” Felix continued to laugh “Felix” He growled low “I think it’s endearing” Demetri added and wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close “Just ignore him, we do” Alec called out as she snuggled into Demetri’s side.

Y/N decided to buy Demetri a present and gave them to him upon his return from a two-day mission “Welcome home Dem. I’ve missed you” She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck “I’ve missed you too sweetheart” Demetri replied, kissing her. “I’ve got you a gift” She led him over to the sofa and handed him a large gift bag. He opened the gift bag and removed a box, lifting the lid revealed a pair of Wolf slippers “I’ve even named them for you ‘Fang and Hunter’” She smiled at him, he smiled back at her, although he seemed nervous “You don’t like them Dem?” She asked “It’s not that. I love them thank you. It’s just vampires and Wolves don’t really get along” He replied “Oh, Oh…sorry I-I didn’t know. I just thought as Wolves are predators and you’re a predator, they’d be perfect” She apologised and seemed sad “Oh no, sweetheart. It’s ok really but Master Caius will have my head if he sees me in these!" He replied and pulled her onto his lap, holding her close and kissing her cheek.

Demetri decided he’d wear his slippers around his room, that way Y/N was happy and Caius couldn’t kill him. Y/N took pictures of him in his new Wolf slippers on her phone as well as a few of them together in their slippers “We’re making memories Demi” She smiled at him and he melted inside as he enjoyed making memories with her, even if some are a little silly.

“House Rule Number 4. We only wear our animal slippers in our room” Demetri tells her as he looks into her eyes “Ok, that sounds good…something just for us” She agreed and kissed him. He liked that he had made her smile and that she understood that the new house rule meant they were keeping something as innocent as Wolf slippers a secret from Caius.

However, Demetri became a little stressed at the situation he found himself in because the love of his immortal life had bought him a gift; one which he loved and seeing that noone had ever bought him a gift before, they meant something to him but the problem was if anyone knew the Wolf slippers existed and Caius found out, he would surely torture him in some way.

Felix entered Demetri’s room one evening to see the couple sitting on the sofa watching a movie in their pyjamas and slippers. “Not you too D?” Felix asked as he sat on the other sofa “Y/N got them for me and they’re quite comfortable actually” Demetri replied waving his feet about “Did you name them too?” Felix’s tone was a teasing one “No, I named them before I gave them to him” Y/N responded and Felix started laughing, so much so Y/N thought he may actually wet himself “You tell anyone Fe & I’ll kill you” Felix nodded but continued to laugh.

Y/N enjoyed living with her vampire mate as there was never a dull moment in the castle especially with Demetri to keep her company. She enjoyed the sunset picnics on the castle roof, the shared bubble baths and showers as they always led to something more. Date nights were always fun no matter who planned them.

The masters needed Demetri to track a coven in England and Caius made a special trip to the tracker’s room. He knocked on the door and entered “Good evening Demetri” “Good evening master” He replied and bowed “I need you to track that small coven in England” Demetri concentrated for a moment before replying “They are currently in Oxford, master.” Caius nodded “Thank you but I must ask what on earth are those on your feet?” He asked “Y/N bought me the Wolf slippers as a gift, she owns Giraffe ones” Dem replied “I know, I’ve seen hers but why would she buy you Wolf slippers?” Caius asked “Wolves are predators and I am a predator and she thought they’d be perfect” Dem responded, Caius nodded “I understand but I’m not sure I like them though. They are not to be worn around the castle” “Yes master” Demetri agreed, knowing he had no plans to do so. “Nice pyjamas” Caius smirked when he saw Y/N leave the bathroom in Beige pyjamas with Cocktail Glasses and Palm Trees on, that just so happened to match Demetri’s “Thank you Caius, they’re known ‘couple pyjamas.’ It allows couples to wear matching nightwear” Y/N responded and bowed her head a little. Caius found it amusing that the World’s Best Tracker and his human mate wore matching pyjamas. ‘How sweet’ he thought to himself.

Caius decided to punish Demetri in an interesting way after he discovered Demetri’s Wolf slippers. Demetri was over 1000 years old and found himself ‘grounded’ and ‘remanded’ to his shared room with Y/N for one week. “Use this upcoming week to bond more with Y/N” “I will thank you” Demetri replied, Caius smiled and left the room.

The week Demetri spent in his room with Y/N was one of the best weeks of his life, that Demetri could recall; they did become closer, their bond strengthening as a result. They binged watched TV shows and films and well as reading silently on their own or sometimes aloud to each other. They also spent many intimate moments together, neither one able to get enough of the other.

“It’s Tuesday why are you wearing trousers? Have you forgotten House Rule number 3?” Demetri asked as Y/N walked out of the bathroom “I remember House Rule number 3 and these are not trousers. These are Capri Pants” She replied smiling & twirling “Pants? What the EVER-loving hell are those?” Demetri says as he looks at her “Panties, I’ve heard of those. Yours are currently on our bedroom floor…” He winked and nodded over his shoulder “…But pants? Never heard of them” “So, that’s where my panties went?” She replied, winking at him and he growled at her. Before she knew what was happening, he was in front of her and she felt him tear her pants off “Hey” She cried out “Trouserless Tuesday” He replied and gestured to his naked lower half before pushing her against the wall; lifting her up, her legs wrapping around his waist as he entered her in one slow long stroke “Ahh…” She breathed “See, this is why we have House Rule number 3” He continued to thrust in and out of her slowly, making love to her “Oh, unrestricted access to one another?” He nodded at her “I think Tuesdays may just be my favourite day of the week” She added with a wink “Mine too sweetheart. Mine too.”

[absolutebl]

This Week In BL

Feb 2021 Part 3 

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. 

Ongoing Series Thai 

1000 Stars Ep 4 - so flipping lovely, I’ve come entirely around to this show. 

Manner of Death Ep 13 - the penultimate episode was as angsty & twisty as we could want, but it’s starting to feel a bit stretched. Although new tag #oakcake is the best thing ever. 

Brothers Ep 2 - still a mess but there’s a cute foodie side couple (young college student wants cute older baker). As the world’s foremost ChampDoc proponent I am obviously in it for them. The other couples though... eek. 

Ongoing Series Not Thai 

You Are Ma Boy Ep 6 (Vietnam) - second week running with no new episode and no indication as to why. If it ended at 5 then it ended on a cliffhanger. Grrr. 

Amore Ep 27 (Pinoy) - FINALLY finished its run at 27 episodes! TWENTY SEVEN. I stopped watching it ages ago but it’s done now so if you’re a binger and you need to see the “everyone wants Joey” show, it’s all on YouTube. We salute your bravery. 

Stand Alones 

Finally watched Korea’s Step For You from 2018 (in preparation for You Make Me Dance). OMG it’s SO CUTE. And who says Korea can’t do kisses? Oh wait, that was me. Anyway, no dead fish here. School newspaper journalist has to interview the next big thing senior dancer and falls in love with him. Short af but ADORABLE. 

I got my brains back and decided to FINALLY watch 2015 Japanese BL Seven Days. It comes in two parts: Seven Days: Monday - Thursday & Seven Days: Friday - Sunday. You can watch it eng subbed on YouTube. It’s one of the best Japanese BLs ever made (FIGHT ME) and that’s because it has a lot of the breezy style of something like 2gether (with, sadly the same heat level - low). The leads have a similar comfort level with each other which yields up fantastic on screen chemistry. It’s a charming af high school story with none of the usual stalker/obsession/rapey elements (nor the egregiously cartoonish humor) I’ve come to expect from Japanese BL. Despite the setting, it’s a lot more in the Cherry Magic vain than, say, Takumi-kun. GO WATCH IT. The hair is bonkers, but if that’s all I can think of bad to say, you know it must be good. 

The TharnType Wedding Special PPV dropped last week. Champ & Doc officially got together so I was happy. They hit a bunch of tropes, said I do, and that was that. I pronounce it... 

 Breaking News - So Many Teasers & They Dark AF 

More promos for HIStory 4 keep dropping so I think we can assume this is coming sooner rather than later. (Taiwan doesn’t raise funding the way Thailand does with test teasers, so we only see promo when the thing has started filming.) 

We Best Love 2 dropped its trailer. It’s a doozie. We’re all hoping for a happy ever after but frankly Taiwan means 50/50 chance at best. They love pathos and many of us will never recover from HIStory 3: Make Our Days Count. I’m terrified by the season 2 trailer. 

You Make Me Dance dropped a teaser, that’s our next one out of Korea. 

Lovely Writer showed its dark underbelly with a new angst-riddled teaser... what’s that? A wheaser? 

Secret Admirer the Series dropped its first teaser. I had this one on the rumors list but not actual, so I bumped it up in the upcoming 2021 BL master post. It’s only a taste, it could be gunning for 2022. The director can’t be trusted with happy endings - so I’m not sure about it. 

Gossip 

Wild rumors persist that there will be a new 2gether installment in which someone gets married. I wouldn’t be surprised to see GMMTV milk that cash cow especially if F4 is delayed. (With all these BLs featuring marriage, maybe the Thai government will legalize it on account of the boost destination weddings would give the tourist industry post covid?) 

Bad Roommate dropped a teaser for all you Gen Y Padlock lovers out there (waves at @heretherebedork​). Do we trust Star Hunter after the Gen Y debacle? Maybe? I don’t know. Who cares, it’s fresh content. 

More rumors of a We Best Love special episode before season 2. If they’re true my guess is it’s another behind the scenes thingy. 

Fish Upon the Sky is reported to drop ep 1 on Friday, April 9th, 2021! This is the rivals to lovers BL I’ve been waiting for! 

I am SO FLIPPING EXCITED. 

Initial murmurs about Close Friend - a 6 ep run featuring established BL ships from an unknown director: KimCop (2Moons & Gen Y), OhmFluke (Until We Meet Again), JimmyTommy & MaxNat (Why R U), JaFirst (TharnType 2), and YoonLay (YYY). Either each couple gets their own episode (like Our Skyy) or it will be more like You Never Eat Alone. Ships may or may not be playing the same characters as previous. 

A few more promo shots posted for Y-Destiny. It looks more serious than director Cheewin normally goes for (YYY & You Never Eat Alone). I don’t know if that means anything or if it’s just a mature styling we’re seeing in Thai BL as a result of the actors getting older and the influence of Manner of Death and KinnPorsche. 

Speaking of You Never Eat Alone is supposed to be finally dropping official Eng Subs somewhere, and ep 9 features Prem & Boun. I’m not bothering with this one so I don’t know where it’s posting. 

Next Week Looks Like This: 

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here. 

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something. 

[lustinglilac]

Everything About You

A/N: This is a long one but, I’ve been meaning to post it, just hadn’t had the time to edit it until now! It’s a couple of different parts happening over a span of 3 days leading up to them finally getting together. (Not based on any episode in particular)

Pairing: EZ Reyes x OC (Nestor’s sister)

Warnings: blood, death, shooting, guns, strong language, brief sexual harassment, 18+, smut, choking, oral (m/f receiving), vocal EZ, unprotected sex.

Word count: 33.1 k (sorry, I couldn’t stop typing)

*gif not mine*

Thursday, 2:15 PM She rolled over in her empty bed, sighing, plain white sleep shirt rising over the curve of her ass.

“Fuck!” She was going to be late to Miguel’s interrogation. Her phone had at least five missed calls from her brother and three messages from her boss, Miguel.

She braced herself for the angry man on the other line as she finally called him back, “Where the fuck are you, Nic?” Her brother’s voice coming through tight on the other side.

“Nestor, fucking relax. I just got up.” She admitted cringing at her words, hopping on one leg trying to put on her pants and talk to him at the same time. She stumbled over the mess of laundry she had on the floor of her room, kicking it to the side to deal with later.

“Hurry the fuck up. The guys are going to be here soon and I can’t have my right hand not show up.” He hangs up abruptly, not giving her a chance to respond. He could be so frustrating at times.

She looked at her outfit in the mirror before brushing her teeth and fixing her hair to look somewhat presentable.

She knew Miguel’s cartel dressed to the nines but, in all honesty, she couldn’t be bothered right now considering she was too late to pick out a decent outfit, going for a more laid back option.

2:35 PM She had a few more minutes before she had to show up, taking her chances, grabbing the keys to her Cadillac and running out the door. She stopped at their local Starbucks, the drive thru line surprisingly empty. Luck was definitely on her side today as she ordered her espresso and paid, downing the tiny cup in two gulps.

“Si tú me llama'. Nos vamo' pa' tu casa. Nos quedamo' en la cama. Sin pijama, sin pijama.” The radio played softly in the background, making her hum along; she came to a halt at the shady spot where people did not make it out alive most of the time.

It was three o’clock on the dot as she cursed under her breath, throwing her empty Starbucks cup on the ground and walking quickly into the building; her breathing never faltering thanks to her rigorous exercise routine.

“She’ll be here, Miguel, she was just running an errand for me—“ Nestor’s voice sounded as she rounded the corner, coming to a halt at the gate.

“I’m here.” She smiled, panting slightly, as twelve pairs of eyes landed on her. Some widened, others more dark as they looked at her from head to toe, eyeing her body. She walked past the men closest to the gate, the Mayans, excusing herself and making her way towards her boss.

Nestor shook his head, running a hand down his face as Miguel all but frowned at her. He had known her and Nestor since they were younger, always having their backs because he knew they always had his. Miguel smiled, pulling her in for a kiss on the cheek as she gladly accepted before flipping off her brother behind Miguel’s embrace.

“Gonna let me get one last fuck in before I die, Galindo? How fucking thoughtful of you.” A strangled voice seethed to her left as the room was stunned into dead silence now.

She bit her lip anxiously, closing her eyes, huffing quietly as Miguel held a firm grasp on her as not to let her interfere with what was going to happen next.

“Hijo de puta— what the fuck did you just say?” Nestor abandoned his position at the table of weapons altogether narrowing his eyes at the perpetrator, tied up to the pew and struggling to breath.

“Hermano—“ Her voice coming out small in the room full of men. She knew what he was about to do. The man on the wooden pew messed with the wrong Oceteva as realization dawned across his bloody face.

“That’s his sister?!” A muffled voice from one of the men in leather vests gasped before being shut up by another older gentleman.

“Please— I-I didn’t know! Please!” Nestor had already brought his gun to the traitor’s temple, pulling the trigger without hesitation. She flinched slightly as the man’s body lay limp on the seat, Nestor telling his men to clean up the mess.

“Sorry you had to hear that—“ Miguel apologized sincerely, patting the younger woman on the shoulder as she shrugged. She was used to seeing and hearing worse from men who thought she was just another easy girl, Nestor always coming to her defense when it did happen though. She’d always told him, “Nestor, I can handle myself.” Yet, he couldn’t help but be protective. She was his baby sister after all.

“It’s fine. What can I do for you, though?” She crossed her arms over her chest as she watched her brother’s movements behind Miguel. He was pissed the fuck off, to say the least.

“I’d like to introduce you to my newest hires.” He walked her over to the stunned men in the corner, who wouldn’t dare make eye contact with her. Hell, not after what just happened. She smiled tightly, despite wanting to roll her eyes at their sheepish behavior.

“They will be working with us, reporting back any suspicious activity going on that we may have missed. Although that is highly unlikely.” He stated matter of factly making her nod her head in agreement. “Gentlemen, this is Nicole Oceteva, Nestor’s second in command and his sister.” Miguel kept his naturally stoic posture as he introduced her.

“Pleasure to meet you, Miss Oceteva. We look forward to working with you.” She read the name tag of the person who had spoken to her, choosing his words carefully, Presidente.

“Please, call me Nicole.” She smiled warmly, sticking out her hand for him to shake. “I look forward to getting to know all of you.”

EZ furrowed his brows, eyeing her warily. How the hell had she been so comfortable after what just happened minutes ago?

“Bishop.” The older man returned her smile as he turned around to his crew and introduced them, “This is Riz, Taza, Tranq, Gilly.” He pauses to let them shake her hand hesitantly, “Coco, Angel, and EZ.” The younger looking Mayans more confident in stretching out their hands for her to shake.

She couldn’t take her eyes off of EZ as he had been introduced, his touch lingering the longest. She pulled away from his warm grasp on her hand immediately at the sound of her brother’s voice, “Nicole—“

Miguel let her go as he stayed behind, whispering something to the Mayans that had to do with business no doubt.  

EZ had felt the same, he felt a spark run up his hand as soon as she had taken it. He knew she could sense it, too. He watched her walk away, the sway of her hips distracting him, until Miguel cleared his throat, nearly catching him staring.

“You didn’t need to do that, Nestor—“ She huffed as the dead body had been taken away seconds ago, eyeing the pew in which it once lay.

He scoffed, stubborn as ever, “Nah, he deserved it, trust me. Next time, you come here on time, even earlier than when I tell you, I don’t want you slipping up again, understand?” He looked down at her shorter frame, trying to intimidate her but he knew better than that.

“Mhmm.” She mocked. They both knew she probably wasn’t going to kick her habit because Miguel was too lenient when it came to her, he loved her like his own sister considering he never had one, she was the closest thing.

The Mayans were long gone by now as Miguel strode back to the siblings in his tailored suit.

“Everything okay?” Miguel scanned her face for any signs of distress as she nodded confidently, attempting to grab one of the guns from her brother’s array of weapons.

“Yes. How’s Emily? And my nephew?” She asked eagerly as Nestor slapped her hand away, making her pout and turn back to her boss.

“They’re doing well. Your nephew misses you, Nicole, don’t be a stranger. You are always welcome in our home. In fact, I have a charity event set up for this weekend, I would love for you to be there.” Miguel spoke as one of his men put on his suit jacket for him, straightening it out.

She contemplated her decision for a moment, tossing her hair to the side, “She’ll be there. I could use the help anyway.” Before she even had a chance to answer, her brother had spoken for her.

“Great. Saturday night, six o’clock sharp.” Smoothing down his collar, he turned on his heel and exited the building. She grinned politely until he was out of sight and then turned to frown at her brother.

“You’re not my lawyer, I don’t understand why you need to answer for me.” She stomped her foot like a child.

“When you start acting right, I’ll consider it.” Nestor huffed and fixed the holsters hanging under his arms.

“You literally embarrassed me in front of those guys! Three of which were so fucking cute!” She clenched her jaw tightly, wanting nothing more than to shove him into the wall for being so protective.

“Hey, watch your mouth.” He raised his eyebrows at her confession. “I won’t let you get involved with some lowlife who worships his bicycle.”

She could not believe how persistent her brother was, “Pretty sure they’re motorcycles. And next time don’t bother calling me when I’m running late. I’ll show up when I want to.” She turned away from him and strutted out of the stuffy room and into the daylight, Nestor hot on her heels.

“You stopped for coffee? Really, Nic?” He scoffed as he kicked the discarded paper cup towards her.

“I was thirsty!” She grumbled and slammed her car door shut, thanking God she didn’t have to see him until at least the night before Miguel’s gala. It’s not that they didn’t have a good relationship as brother and sister but he did manage to get on her nerves, a lot of the time.

She finally calmed down and put her car into reverse, backing out into the street, deciding on not heading home just yet. She made her way past the busy streets, traffic hitting hard at this time of the day. She finally got to where she wanted, pulling over into the designated parking spot.

She needed to find a decent dress for Saturday, she couldn’t show up in just anything. And if her favorite Mayan, at the moment, was going to be there Nicole definitely wanted to step up her game.

She was welcomed immediately into the air conditioned boutique, as the ladies had come to recognize her since the few times she’d shopped there with Emily.

“Nicole, what can we do for you?” The store manager smirked as she stalked towards her favorite customer. Nicole didn’t respond just yet as she eyed the rack of new dresses that hadn’t even been taken out of their plastic bags.

“Hmmm... I need a dress. Preferably long, preferably blue. Nothing too revealing but also, I don’t wanna look like a nun.” She raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow as the staff scrambled to find her what she’d just described.

She took a seat on the plush sofa as they presented her dress after dress, flipping through them like pages of a magazine. Until one finally caught her eye, it was gorgeous right down to the detailing. It was the only one that had been on an actual mannequin.

“I’ll take it.” Nicole was floored by the way it looked on the mannequin and to be honest, she couldn’t wait to wear it. She’d have to find a way to conceal her thigh holster in it considering that the hip-high slit left little to be desired. Nestor was going to flip out, but she didn’t care. She wanted it more than anything.

“And it’s just your size. It was meant to be, Nicki.” The manager held her hand out greedily to take her credit card, swiping it and packing the dress neatly into a box, handing her the bag.

“Muchas gracias, chicas.” She blew them a kiss and walked out into the warm air of her town once again.

She couldn’t wait to get home to try on the dress, speeding off in the direction of her house. Nicole grabbed her belongings and headed inside, dead bolting her door and running down the hall to her room.

She stripped off her clothes leaving her in a black lace thong and her bra, taking the dress out and placing it up against her body, the smooth silk fabric rubbing against her skin softly. She slipped it on with ease, the fabric tightening at her waistline and flowing loosely down the back of her legs.

Nicole picked up her thigh holster, securing it around her thigh to test it, it would definitely not be concealed but she’d have to deal with the consequences if she wanted to wear this stunning piece. And she really did.

With a soft sigh, she took the dress off carefully, placing it back in its box for safe keeping.

Nicole walked down the hall to her spacious kitchen, preparing herself a bowl of pasta and sunk down into the couch to enjoy it. Before she knew it, she’d dozed off with the TV playing in the background, a small blanket draped over her body. ••• “You got a deathwish? Hey, EZ—“ Angel was fuming as his brother had pissed him off yet again.

“What?” The younger Reyes turned around abruptly, glaring at Angel.

“Don’t do it man, I saw that look in your eyes. Nestor’s sister, don’t fucking do it.” He warned him as Ezekiel scoffed loudly.

“What look? I didn’t do shit, Angel. Tranquillo.” He was getting defensive and Angel knew better than to press him. Not yet at least.

“She’s the competition. You never fuck the competition.” Coco piped up from his spot at the bar, downing his beer in a few quick sips.

“What do you know about competition, loco?” Gilly couldn’t help but comment.

“Matter fact, what do you know about fucking?” Angel waited for a reply from the Mayan, grunting amusedly when he didn’t get one, “That’s what I thought.”

“Blowing this out of proportion, as always.” EZ was beyond angered at the way they spoke about a woman they barely even knew. He wondered if she’d be there Saturday night.

They’d been invited to Miguel’s gala as a second pair of eyes and ears. Bishop hesitantly accepted since he knew it wouldn’t really be their scene but, they were desperate for money so they took the invite anyway.

EZ was tired from the day’s events, slipping out of the clubhouse, driving his bike all the way to his father’s, settling in for the night.   ••• “Nicki! Open the door!” A loud banging on her front door interrupted her training session, pausing her music making her huff loudly running to answer it at the sound of her brother’s voice.

“What, Nestor?!” She swung the door open aggressively, wiping the sweat off of her brow and going back to her workout in the spare room.

He came in with two other guards she hadn’t seen before, she figured they were new hires considering the event was going to be packed with strangers and it was being held in Miguel’s own home.

Nestor held up a blueprint of the mansion to her face, “We need to go over the layout.”

She sighed loudly, stopping her assault on the punching bag and looking between him and the two new members, “I’m listening.”

“We keep it tight, secure, we have eyes and ears in every corner of the room, got it?” Nestor laid the paper flat on the desk in front of them, “This hallway right here has no cameras, it’s a weak spot, that’s where Nicole will be positioned. You two, front entrance, ID guests and make sure their names appear on the list.” He spoke aggressively, making sure his crew heard every word of the plan.

“This,” She motioned to the group, “Could’ve been a group FaceTime, Nestor, not a house visit.”

“That’s what I said.” One of the new guys snorted, earning a death stare from his boss.

She rolled her eyes at the way the man shut up immediately, apologizing to Nestor, not daring to look at him.

“Yes! Thank you, he gets it!“ She turned to the young man bold enough to speak back to her brother, “Don’t let him intimidate you.” She winked.

“That’s enough!” Nestor’s hand coming down harsh onto the wooden desk, crumpling up the blueprint, “I’ll see you on Saturday Nicole, and don’t be fucking late.” With that, he and his men left her home letting her get back to her activities.

She locked the door behind them, downing a water bottle, breathing quite heavily as she checked her phone for any new messages.

With a heavy sigh, she got up from the couch, heading for her shower to cool off. She needed to do her nails, picking a nice red color from her selection of nail polishes before stepping into the mist of water.

She washed off the sweat, shaving off the thin layer of stubble that had accumulated on her legs before doing the same to her underarms. She stepped out, drying off her body and applying some moisturizing cream, she sat at her vanity concentrating on shaping and filing her long nails perfectly.

Once she was pleased with the way they’d come out, she waited until they were dry to start touching anything. She needed to get her things ready for tomorrow evening.

She neatly folded her clothes and placed them in their respective drawers before tidying up her bed. She would have to be on high alert the whole night considering she had one of the weaker spots to guard. She picked out an outfit to wear for the remainder of the day, settling on a black shirt and a pair of cargo pants with sneakers.

She forgot that she promised her brother she would have dinner with him tonight, checking the time in order to start cooking something up to bring over to his place.

Dinner time rolled around, Nicole grabbing her belongings and heading over to Nestor’s. He didn’t live far, about fifteen minutes away by car; they used to live together until Nicole wanted to have her own space and Nestor his which was understandable.

“Qué pasó?” She smiled as he opened up the door to his lavish home, not a speck of dust anywhere.

“Hey. Thought you wouldn’t show.” He leaned down to kiss her on the cheek, ruffling her hair slightly and taking the glass tupperware from her hands.

“You ready for tomorrow night?” She spoke, setting up the island with two plates and utensils, uncovering her food. She hummed pleasantly as the smell filled her nostrils.

Nestor looked at her, “Yeah, we have everything secured. What are you wearin’?” He asked her around a mouthful of salad.

“A dress.” She tried to divert the attention to another subject, “You?”

“Okay, why’re you actin’ so weird? What color? Maybe I’ll match with you.” He laughed loudly at the disgusted look on her face, not that he was planning to match with her but it was funny to rile her up.

“Don’t even. People already think we look like twins, let's not give them another reason to add to the list.” She scoffed.

They wrapped up their dinner silently, getting comfortable on each end of one of his couches, watching whatever movie was playing on TV. The siblings enjoyed one another’s company, as much as they won’t admit it, because growing up they only really ever had each other.

It was getting dark out and Nicole really didn’t wanna be falling asleep at the wheel, calling it a night as Nestor walked her to the door, “See you tomorrow, hermana. Get home safe.”

Before she could respond, a knock at the door startled her as she looked at her brother with a  curious expression, “You expecting someone?”

“Ah shit. It’s the bike riders.” He opened the door up, revealing the same men she’d seen yesterday, smiling at them over Nestor’s shoulder.

Her eyes scanned the group of them for EZ, not being able to tell who was who underneath their helmets and the fact that it was quite dark out.

“Nestor, can we talk?” Bishop spoke calmly. Nestor grunted a response, seeing his sister out in order to handle the business until she protested, wanting to hear what they had to say.

“Absolutely. What about?” Nicole stood at the doorway, questioning the older man. Bishop looked over his shoulder at his club, looking back to the siblings with a grin.

“Nicole— I excused you. You can go.” Nestor pointed his stare at her, motioning for her to leave.

She scoffed, raising her eyebrows, wanting so badly to argue with him right now but deciding not to, “Ugh. You’re fucking annoying, and don’t forget it. Goodbye.” She stomped her foot, huffing in frustration as Nestor snickered obnoxiously at her attitude.

“What did you want to talk about?” Nestor’s hushed voice sounded behind her.

She was barely watching where she was going as she headed to her car, catching herself before she bumped into a mass of muscle, “Excuse me.” She whispered harshly, looking up at the figure.

It was him. Her breath caught in her throat, she was flustered for the first time and if anyone knew Nicole, they knew she never got flustered that easily.

“Sorry.” EZ coughed, moving out of her way, a few snickers were heard behind him.

“No, don’t be. My fault, I wasn’t watching where I was going.” She bit her lip, watching him shift his eyes between her and her brother at the door who hadn’t noticed their interaction yet.

“All good.” EZ smiled down at her smaller frame, mentally face palming himself for his lame choice of words. All good? Really, Ezekiel?

“Well, have a goodnight. See you around.” Her eyes held a glimmer of hope that he’d return the same words.

“Yeah, see you around.” He breathed out, keeping his distance, just as Bishop had finished conversing with Nestor.

With that, she left the scene, hot and bothered, all eyes on her due to the interaction that just occurred. ••• Slipping on the beautiful silk fabric, she secured her gun to her thigh holster, trying to conceal it as best as she could; the thigh high split really brought attention to that part of her legs.

Nicole was almost ready to go, checking often to make sure her brother hadn’t arrived to pick her up yet. She made sure her purse had all of her essentials in it and put on one more coat of lip gloss just for safe measure. She figured she wasn’t going to get on Nestor’s nerves tonight considering it was a huge event and it was important to Miguel.

She slipped on her heels, making sure they were snug before heading down the hall slowly, adjusting her dress every now and then. Her hair flowed down her back, makeup kept to a minimum as not to overpower the color and details on her dress.

Nestor was outside with his men, honking once to signal his arrival just as she closed the door behind her and turned around, eyes following her every move to the waiting car.

“Where’s the rest of your dress?” Here he goes again. She rolled her eyes at his old fashioned thinking, flipping him off and settling into the passenger seat, smiling over her shoulder at two of their men who occupied the backseat.

“Not even a ‘Hi Nicole, how are you?’ ‘Oh, Nicole you look beautiful’.” She hit his shoulder.

Nestor scoffed, continuing to drive for another few minutes before pulling up to the lavish mansion. It was a quarter to six when they’d arrived and some guests had already begun populating the front yard, waiting to be checked by security.

She opened her door, swinging her legs out as elegantly as possible, trying not to catch the dress on anything. Her heels clicked on the pavement as she strutted past the front door with Nestor and his posse, winking to the two younger men who had been at her house the other day.

Miguel turned around upon hearing the doors open, “Que bonita. You look beautiful, as always.” He marveled at the young woman, pulling her in for a kiss on the cheek just as Emily emerged with her son on her hip.

“Nicole! Oh my goodness.” Emily gawked at her from head to toe, eyes wide as she took in what she was wearing.

“Hey! I missed you!” They hugged each other tightly.

Nicole placed a kiss on her nephew’s cheek as he smiled at her, “I cannot get enough of that face. Look how big you got!” She cooed.

The ladies had a lot to catch up on since the last time they’d seen each other, gossiping and laughing occasionally as guests poured in. Her eyes searching every now and again for the soft brown ones she’d grown accustomed to.

She kept a watchful eye out for that hallway Nestor had positioned her to, making sure no one went out of their sight of vision. After an hour of chatting with guests and receiving multiple compliments, and some stares due to her scandalous dress, he finally decided to show up.

Her breath caught in her throat as she turned around, facing the handsome man who wore all black and he looked damn good. She bit her lip absentmindedly as she watched him, easily slip through the crowd, not once leaving his club’s side.

“You’re drooling, hermana.” Nestor nudged her, smirking once he caught sight of who it was she was staring at.

She gasped, “Shut up.” Grumbling something under her breath, she turned around, taking a sip of her drink and conversing with the men at the bar. She threw her head back, laughing at a story, completely missing the fact that some scumbag was trying to talk her up. Though, the boys around the bar were quick to shut up, on guard as the sleeze made a scene.

“Beautiful body and easy access? I could have fun with you.” He slurred, bold enough to thrust his hand out to grab her exposed thigh.

She clenched her jaw, shocked that someone had the nerve to come up to her like this, looking around her at the stunned faces, the whole room going silent, as she turned around slowly catching the perp’s hand, twisting it back with a vengeance, moving her body out of the way to slam his head into the wooden bar, pulling him back by his hair as he groaned in pain, nose gushing blood.

“Not so fucking easy now, huh?” She seethed in his ear as she let go of him harshly, the man stumbling back nearly unconscious, guests moving out of the way to let him fall to the ground. He choked on his own tongue as the men behind her pulled him up, dragging his body outside.

“If this motherfucker got blood on my dress—“ She huffed silently checking the fabric for any signs of red spots. She sighed out of relief once she saw that her dress hadn’t been dirtied.

“You good?” Nestor came to her side immediately, making sure his sister was okay before proceeding to deal with the drunken bastard outside.

She smiled politely at the people still staring, making her way to the hallway that she was securing, knowing they wouldn’t know where she was. She needed a second to breath.

EZ had been watching though, the whole ordeal from the moment the man had made a bet with his buddy at the bar that he could land “that hot piece of ass” and it made his blood boil but he wasn’t going to make a scene. Her expression was deadly, he noted, as she turned around to face the bastard. He was stunned but kind of turned on at the fact that she was able to handle her own.

“Man, I wouldn’t wanna fuck with her.” Coco had commented next to him as they were taking the drunkard out of the room. EZ simply grinned, watching as Nicole composed herself and walked off, eyes following her body the whole way down a dark hallway.

“I’m gonna go find the bathroom.” He downed the rest of his drink, fixing his jacket as he stood, looking around discreetly making sure no one saw him follow her.

There they were, together, in a secluded corridor of Miguel’s mansion, tension at an all time high.

Her eyes had to be deceiving her as she gasped, looking at the man standing in front of her, “You lost?” She asked him, pretty eyes widening as he shook his head sheepishly.

“Nah, I’m right where I wanna be, actually. You okay? I saw what happened—“

She stepped closer, almost closing the space between them, heat radiating off both of their bodies, “I’m okay. Nothing I couldn’t handle.” She shrugged nonchalantly, meeting his gaze once again.

“Good. Just wanted to make sure.” EZ reached his hand out cautiously, holding her small jaw in his much larger hand tilting her head up, “You don’t deserve to be treated like that. I know, better than anyone, this is a man’s world, they’re intimidated by you, shit, most of my guys are too. You’re somethin’ else, Nicole.” He inched closer until she melted into him, lips pressing softly into hers.

He pulled away, realizing where he was, “Shit. I’m sorry.” But he wasn’t met with resistance, instead she pulled him back down by the lapels of his suit jacket, whimpering softly when she caught his lip with her teeth.

She pulled back breathlessly, panting slightly, lips swollen and wet, “Fuck me.” Her doe eyes looked up at him, tempting him to take her right then and there.

He groaned lowly, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing, if he wasn’t hard two minutes ago, he was definitely rock hard now. His self control was slipping more and more as she took his hand, running it down her body to the thigh high slit that could make any man fall to his knees.

She watched him the whole time, even when she took his long, thick fingers and slid them past her holster and into the flimsy thong covering her pussy, his breath hitching slightly as he felt how fucking wet she was.

She shivered as he finally took control, swiping a finger up her slit collecting the sweet cum that pooled there, bringing his hand out and up to her waiting mouth as she sucked on his fingers, moaning softly around them, shooting a wave of pleasure straight to his cock.

He leaned down to press his lips to her temple, “Are you sure?” He asked her as she let go of his fingers with a pop.

“Yes, please.” She nodded her head waiting for his next move.

He shut his eyes for a second, breathing out, reveling in the way she spoke so politely. She was going to be the death of him, literally and figuratively.

EZ slowly backed her up to the wall, the molding digging into her back as she gasped, pressing his lips to hers once more desperately. He needed to feel her, to taste her right now.

He grunted as she pressed her hips into his, bringing her palm down to cup him through his black slacks, “Fuck, I been wanting this since the day I first saw you. You’re perfect.” He grinned softly at her as she stared up at him, wanting more.

“Then do it, EZ. Ruin me.” She tempted him. He didn’t need to hear anything else after that, eyes clouded with desire as he kneeled down in front of her, grabbing her left calf and placing it on one of his sturdy shoulders.

She literally felt like she was dreaming, she, like him, couldn’t believe this was happening right now. He nudged her clit over her thong, rubbing it till she whimpered for him, pulling down her thong harshly and spreading her lips with his fingers to his hungry gaze.

“Perfect. Everything about you is.” He hummed making her throb, pressing her head into the wall behind her as he leaned in, pressing his tongue flat to her pussy.

“Oh, fuck.” She was a mess above him and he’d barely even started. As per her request, he was definitely going to ruin her.

He licked at her clit, then fucked her with his tongue, adding a single finger to the equation, “That’s tight.” He growled against her, chin wet with her arousal as he continued his assault.

“Yes, yes, oh fuck.” She whimpered, barely catching her breath, the only sound in the hallway was that of her soaked cunt. Her ears were ringing, her vision nearly went black when he curled his finger against that one spot that made her dizzy.

She was dripping, making a mess on his face, and he couldn’t stop, her smell alone enticing him wanting to make her cum at least 4 times with just his mouth.

“Gonna cum?” He hummed, pressing deeper and rubbing her clit even faster as her body tightened and then spasmed without warning, her release covering his hand down to his wrist.

“Oh my god. You were fucking made for that.” She praises him, pulling him up for a searing kiss.

“I could barely get two fingers in you. So fucking tight.” He spoke against her mouth, biting her lip and letting it go making her giggle.

“I wanna return the favor. Please.” She spoke eagerly, cupping him through his pants again. He was huge, she could already tell and it excited her that much more.

“Nah, you don’t have to—“

“But I want to, EZ. I want you to fuck my mouth.” She pouted.

For the second time that night, he’d lost his cool, his desire for her overpowering his mind. She pulled him into the empty spare room that she knew all too well, having spent multiple sleepless nights in there when she had nowhere else to go, when Miguel was kind enough to help her out for a few months before she could stand on her own two feet.

“Woah— whose bed is this? I don’t wanna intrude.” EZ tugged on her hand, making her stop and explain.

“Don’t worry. It used to be mine. No one’s gonna find us, trust me.” She assured him as he eased up only slightly, the dreaded thought of someone catching them still in the back of his mind.

She kicked off her heels, hiking up her dress, getting onto the large bed, “EZ, relax. Wanna make you feel good.” She was level with his face now as she pulled him closer to her and made him sit back against the headboard.

Her eager hands undid his belt buckle and then his zipper, reaching a hand into the waistband of his boxers, feeling his cock pulsate under her touch.

“Fuck.” He grunted breathlessly, helping her pull him out all the way, pushing his pants and boxers down his thighs a little more.

“Shit. You’re big.” She gasped quietly, seeing him in all his glory, his cock fully erect and leaking cum at the tip. She took him into her hand, pumping slowly, biting her lip as she watched him struggle not to thrust into her hand.

He couldn’t take it anymore, beginning to push her head down gently towards his dick, “Gonna take me all the way in your throat? Fuck that pretty mouth of yours.”

Nicole let out a satisfied hum at his words, she licked a long line from the underside of his cock to the top, repeating the action again making the Mayan hiss at the divine feeling.

“Keep doing that, yeah, just like that— fuck.” He groaned sending a wave of heat straight to her pussy. As embarrassing as it was, she was wet again just from his words.

She tested the waters, delving deeper, licking and sucking, the slurping noises obscene in the darkness of the room.

He pushed her head down deeper, fingers threading through her hair as he guided her on his length, her tongue never ceasing.

“Mmmm, fuck.” He gasped, jaw going slack as he watched her incredible mouth take what she can of him, her hand doing the rest of the work at his base. He thrusted into her mouth making her gag lewdly around his tip, sending him over the edge for the first time.

She swallowed every last bit of his seed, wiping some spit at the side of her mouth. She unbuttoned his shirt quickly, wanting nothing more than to feel the abdominal muscles underneath and lick at his tanned skin.

She straddled his waist, careful not to step on her dress, the thigh high slit proving to be of use in this situation as she grinded down on his bare cock.

EZ palmed at her breast, pulling down the cup revealing to him a shiny metal bar pierced through the nipple, swiping a calloused thumb across it, making her arch into his rough touch, “So sexy. Wanna fuck you, make you mine, baby.” He licked at it, the coolness of the bar sending a shiver down his own spine.

She took it upon herself to grab at his cock, aligning him with her soaking wet hole, sinking down slowly as both their breathing nearly stopped at the sensation.

“Fuck, yes.” She whimpered as he adjusted his grip on her curvy hips, scrunching up her gown just enough to get a good hold on her to thrust upwards.

“Too fuckin’ tight, shit.” He struggled to catch his breath and bottom out at the same time, inching his way into her making sure she was comfortable enough. He finally bottomed out, staying still for a minute until she clenched around him deliciously, begging him to move.

She whimpered when he finally decided to give a little testing thrust upwards, his cock engulfed in her warm, wet pussy, never wanting to leave. She couldn’t help but let out a breathy moan, the feeling all too much for her to handle.

She grinded down on him one more time before he took matters into his own hands, ridding himself of his dress shirt and placing a chaste kiss to her swollen lips.

“Wanna get a better angle, mi amor— make sure you feel me.” He grunts, pulling himself painfully slowly out of her, leaving her to clench around nothing, her thighs burning.

He placed her legs to the side, helping her slide the dress down her body until it was all the way off, leaning his head down to kiss just above the soft skin of her navel.

She didn’t have a moment to compose herself before she was being coaxed down gently to her hands and knees, ass up in the air for his viewing pleasure.

“EZ, please—“ She let out a breathy moan as the cool air hit her most sensitive spot that he’d been in just a minute prior. He cursed, watching her pussy still clench around nothing and listening to her breathing pick up.

“I got you, sweetheart.” He promised her, placing a soft kiss to the bottom of her spine, making her shiver. She was dripping, her core pulsed with anticipation of what was going to come next from him.

He wrapped a calloused palm around each one of her thighs, spreading her for him, pumping his length once more before inserting himself into her. Her walls stretched to accommodate him, though he couldn’t see it, her face contorted in the pain and pleasure of it all. Her grip on the sheets below her tightened as he pulled her back onto him, making her hiss softly.

“Nicole— shit.” EZ grunted behind her,  struggling to catch his breath as she clenched around him wanting him to move already.

He wrapped a hand around her hair, arching her back into him, and thrusted in and out of her tight heat. Her breath caught in her throat, choking on her words at the new position.

“Yes, baby, oh fuck!” She panted, barely able to form any other words.

Ezekiel let go of her hair, bringing his palm to rest against the column of her throat and squeezing a tiny bit, kissing the side of her cheek and groaning into her ear when he felt her pussy squeeze his cock as he’d done so.

Oh, so she was into that shit? Ezekiel smirked against her cheek, choking her just enough, bringing his other hand down to rub harsh circles into her clit. Her nails sunk into the wrist between her thighs when her body almost gave out, writhing with pleasure as he held her tightly against him.

“Don’t fucking stop— oh my god.” Her throat raw from the activities as she continued to meet his thrusts, feeling the swollen head of his dick press against her g-spot vigorously with every snap of his hips.

“Let go— cum for me, baby.” EZ sighed in her ear, the fingers on her sensitive clit never easing up. He felt her body tense, milking his cock for all it was worth as she came.

“Where the fuck did she go?” A muffled voice accompanied by footsteps sounded in the hallway.

“Shit—“ She was panting and gasping as she came down from her high but he had yet to find his own release.

“Can you stay quiet for me? Hmmm?” EZ whispered, pulling out of her swollen, dripping cunt and flipping her onto her back. She nodded wordlessly as he penetrated her once more.

“Feel so fucking good— wanna stay here forever with you.” The Mayan grunted, placing a kiss to the inside of her thigh, thrusts never slowing down as he chased his own orgasm.

She let a loud moan slip between her lips. EZ clamped a hand over her mouth, her eyes rolled back as the tight feeling in the pit of her stomach returned. She was about to cum for the third time that night.

The snap of his hips began to get sloppier, eventually tempting him to pull out, thick white cum painting the lower half of her abdomen.

“Wow—“ She gasped softly before being cut off.

The door handle to the room they were currently using jiggled, his eyes flitting between her and the locked door. He huffed quietly, pulling on his boxer briefs and helping Nicole slip on her thong.

“EZ—“

“Ezekiel— my name’s Ezekiel.” He whispered, smiling at her.

“Ezekiel— I really enjoyed this. Us. And I don’t want it to be a one time thing—“ Her eyes held a glint of hope that he’d felt the same way.

“Yeah, me too.” He pressed his lips to hers, kissing her softly. Before they even had time to react, the door swung open harshly.

“Get the fuck out. Right now.” Nestor’s voice deadly as the two of them pulled away. She barely even had her dress on, grabbing the comforter off the bed and shielding herself from her brother’s view and the extra eyes behind him.

“Nestor wait—“ Her voice wavered, she couldn’t look him in the eye, especially not now.

“Nah— get fucking dressed. Party’s over.” Nestor seethed, glaring at the half naked man standing next to his sister, “I’m not done with you yet, puto.”

With that, he and his men left them to get dressed. Ezekiel shook his head, mind racing a thousand miles a minute.

“I’m so fucking sorry.” She sighed, wiping away the single tear that ran down her face.

“Hey, hold on, what’re you sorry for?” He took her jaw in his palm holding it gently and caressing the skin of her cheek, “Family is family. He’s always gonna worry about you, he’s your brother. Believe me, I know more than anyone.”

“I’m honestly surprised he didn’t shoot me—“ He chuckled lightly, trying to lighten the mood.

“I wouldn’t have let him.” She sniffled, shutting her eyes for a split second before composing herself.

“Oh, yeah? My protector, huh?” He smiled down at her, kissing the top of her head, taking her smaller hand in his and walking out of the room.

[writingwithadinosaur]

“Affirmations” - Oneshot

“Affirmations” - Oneshot

My Masterlist - Here

My Tag List - Here

Malcolm Bright x Reader

Word Count: 1,365

Key: Y/N = Your Name, H/C = Your Hair Color, E/C = Your Eye Color Chunks or lines of text that are in italics means that it's (Y/N)’s thoughts.

Warnings: None that I can think of. Please let me know if I missed anything.

Summary: While attempting his morning routine, Malcolm finds a surprise.

Author’s Note: I literally wrote this in two hours and then decided to immediately post it. So I’m sorry if it’s messy or anything! 

I came up with this idea thanks to the Prodigal son twitter actually. They tweet out daily affirmations and they kind of help me some days when I need good words. Today they helped me with my thoughts and helped come up with this idea.

This was not beta-read, so please let me know if there are any errors! 

If you would like to be tagged in any of my future pieces, check out my tag list above and let me know! And as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

<3

- DreaSaurusREX

~~~~~~~~

It was another semi-restful night for Malcolm. He had been getting more than his average 2-4 hours of sleep a night thanks to your relationship. Neither of you knew exactly how it helped him sleep, but you both were thankful for it. Malcolm had mentioned that people had begun noticing the bags under his eyes not being so dark. 

Even his mother commented, but she had no idea that you were the reason. She had no idea that you even existed in Malcolm’s life. Malcolm wanted to keep you a secret until “it felt right to tell her.” 

As Malcolm came into the kitchen of his apartment, he saw you pouring some coffee into your thermos. You were already dressed, so he knew he wouldn’t be able to enjoy the morning with you. Malcolm lazily walked next to you and kissed your cheek.

“Good morning, sleepy!” You poke before smiling at him, meeting his lips for a quick kiss, then passing him a mug of coffee. He goes to sit on the other side of the kitchen island while you fix up a lunch to take to work.

“Good morning, darling. Early meeting?”

“Sadly. It's with that insufferable couple that has been taking their sweet time making a decision on whether or not they want to hire me or Walter.” You heard Malcolm choke on his coffee causing you to quickly turn around concerned. 

“Wait. They’re choosing between you and Walter? The man that dresses like a toddler and can barely handle one client, let alone two?” You were a bit shocked that he remembered your past comments on your coworker, but you smiled and chuckled at the accuracy.

“And now you know why I think this couple is insufferable.” Malcolm let out a snigger as he took another sip of his coffee and you packed the last of your stuff. He saw you almost ready and stood to walk you to the door, something he always did whenever you had to leave before him.

“I should be home a bit early tonight. I don’t have too much to do after this meeting. But I’ll keep you updated.” Malcolm grabbed your coat as you two walked towards the door. He held it out for you to slip your arms through. You thanked him with a kiss and he reached for the door. 

As you were walking through the threshold, you turned back around.

“Please try to eat something before you go out. There are some overnight oats in the fridge, or maybe try to make some eggs? Something to make sure you don’t die from stupidity.”

“You do know that there are other stupid ways I could die that don’t involve my lack of appetite, right?” You knew Malcolm was half-joking through that smile on his face, but you knew there was some truth behind it. You couldn’t help but shoot a slightly parental look at him.

“And I would like to keep ‘dying from starvation’ off that list of stupid ways to die. Eat. I’ll text you when I leave the office. Love you!” You waved as you walked out to try and catch the bus. Malcolm chuckled and made his way back inside, stopping nearby the birdcage in the main room.

“What should we try to stomach today, Sunshine?” 

As per your request, Malcolm spent the next 10 or so minutes making some eggs and toast. Simple, shouldn’t upset his stomach too much.

Malcolm set down his plate and second cup of coffee on the kitchen island, getting ready to start his routine. As he sat down, he pulled his pill container and his box of daily affirmations closer. As he brought the box closer, he noticed something different: The top card wasn’t in the typical type font that he knew. Instead, it was handwritten. He read it out loud before trying to figure out whose handwriting it was.

“I am the architect of my life; I build its foundation and choose its contents. -(Y/N/N)”

Malcolm couldn’t help but smile wide when he realized that it was your handwriting You had even doodled a small heart in the corner. 

Looking back at the box of affirmations, he saw that some of the cards were now just a smidge taller than the others, most likely marking where you had put in your own affirmations for him to read. He almost picked out the odd ones to read them, but he decided against it.

Before he could think much further, the very familiar voice of Jessica Whitly rang through the door. Malcolm flipped the card upside down on the counter and took a bite out of his toast, not wanting to have her find out about you just yet. Inviting herself in and filling up a glass of water, she started pouring her stream of consciousness out to the slightly annoyed ears of Malcolm.

“Malcolm, dear! I think I may have been able to work my magic and get you a date! One of the ambassadors for the company I met with yesterday has this beautiful daughter! I really think the two of you would hit it off very well if you would just take a night off and give it a chance!”

“Good morning to you too, Mother. I thought I told you, I don’t need help with dating. I’ve got it under control.” Jessica just sighed, the plate of food in front of him catching her eye.

“Wait- Are you actually eating a meal?”

“Well, I was until you interrupted.” Malcolm’s phone chimed next to him. All he read was Gil’s name and the word “homicide” and he was hooked. “And before there was a triple homicide in a botanical garden.” 

Jessica couldn’t help but scowl slightly in disgust. She still didn’t understand why her son would willingly surround himself with death like this, but if it kept him close, she accepted it. Malcolm stood to usher her to the door when she noticed the card slightly hidden under his breakfast plate.

“You know, you could have just told me that you had a girlfriend from the beginning,” Jessica said cooly as she looked Malcolm in the eye.

“What are you talking about?” Malcolm tried to play dumb, Jessica just raised an eyebrow in response and turned to walk out the door. 

“I want to meet her. How does dinner Thursday night sound? I’ll invite Ainsley too. I’m sure she would love to meet this (Y/N) girl. I’ll send you the details later.” And with that, she was out the door, leaving Malcolm slightly dumbfounded. 

How the hell did she find out about you? None of your stuff was out for her to see that you were occasionally staying with him. There wasn’t any lingering scent of your perfume that he could tell. There definitely weren’t any pictures of the two of you in this part of the apartment. So how did she figure it out?

Still confused, Malcolm turned back to try and have another few bites of his breakfast when he saw it. The evidence. 

You had written on the back of the card:

“I know these are cliche and maybe not the best affirmations, but I wanted to help shake things up a bit! Maybe make you smile a bit more! Love you!  

-- (Y/N)”

Malcolm chortled as he ran his hands up his face and through his hair and sighed. 

He knew it wasn’t going to be too awful introducing you to his mother and Ainsley, and he really did love you. But he couldn’t help but be nervous at the thought of an infamous Whitly family dinner as your first interaction with both of them. 

He took another bite of food when Gil texted him the address of the crime scene. Shaking his head slightly in an attempt to shake away the thought, Malcolm took his medications and reread both sides of today’s affirmation, finding a pure smile to form over his face. With that smile still there, he turned to get dressed for the day, talking to his bird as he walked away from his half-eaten breakfast.

“Well, this week is just turning out to be all kinds of fun, isn’t it, Sunshine?”

[shaechans]

a shaechans fic: unexpected company

to: somni ( @insomni-writing​ ) a merry christmas to you somni!!! anddddd i’ve been your secret santa all this time ahhh i hope you’re surprised. maybe a little???? anyway, apologies in advance cause this is not that good and quite rushed (you may see a few edits after i’ve published ahhh but please pay no mind thanks<3) but i hope you like this. i wrote about a uh uh surprise trope and i know you like horror but i’m not good at those:(( so i wrote this. i also posted a moodboard for this (and one for you special;)) on my other account @a5ahiboyz so check it out!! small note at the end as well yee i talk too much

pairing: lee haechan x somni

genre: strangers! au, fluff, a little angst towards the end and in the middle, kinda boring:((

word count: 3.2k it was supposed to be 2.5k ahhhhhhh

warnings: like one swear word

the evening wasn’t going well for somni. ironic seeing how she was always one to get things done her way or it wasn’t considered an accomplishment to her. but today was...different. it was the day she had met a fellow, claimed master criminal lee haechan.

lee haechan, or by birth, donghyuck—something somni would prefer calling him just to see him clench fists—would be your definition of next door boy. friendly, the type to reach out for cookies with a mischievous grin kinda tune. he carries a lovely, bubbly energy every time he shows his face and is the neighborhood's pride and, at this point, only hope! and he was happy to be so. 

except for the fact that he was an evil genius.

thursday, 24th december  21:11pm

flipping through the fiction section of the bookstore, somni let out a sigh seeing the stock of last ones left alive, a book she had been aching to get her hands on, diminishing each day she’d visit the store. she was running out of motivation to actually get a job, like she had considered a few days, and/or steal anything seeing how she wouldn’t be able to afford it anyway.

sighing yet again, she got herself ready to walk back to her ‘house’. rubbing her palms and blowing hot air into them she prepared for the cold and harsh wind to hit her out of her senses again. as she thought of a hot chocolate to warm her system, a certain book caught her eye from the new release section. turning back around, somni rushed over to read through the summary at the back.

all too focused on the book, she missed to hear the last call for the last of customers at the store. and when she did get back to her senses, she heard the last of the keys jingling as the owner locked the store. somni’s head whipped in the direction of the main door, as she made a run for the door, eyes widening to saucers in realization.

after a minute or so of banging and yanking at the door knob, somni let go, sliding down the door before regretting as the cold wind from the loose end of the door nipped at her skin. she sighed loudly at the thought of spending the night in this cold nightmare of a store. alone. until she heard a voice on the other, back end of the store. picking up a book near her as defense, somni carefully walked over, curiosity getting the best of her.

“um hello-AHHAHHHHHHHHKASJAKJHSSJ” the figure keyboard smashed as somni ran over, in an attack stance before smacking the shadow across the head. the mysterious person was now unconscious on the floor as somni panicked over her actions. the person would come to be the very famous, lee haechan!

somni was born to loving parents and got everything she ever wanted. except she could never be satisfied with whatever it was she did receive. don’t get the girl wrong, what she demanded would be given at her feet, but unfortunate for her parents, as easily satisfied she was, twice the dissatisfaction she would spit. it wasn’t until her father snapped at her and abandoned her by the family cottage just 2 miles away from home. but then again, it wasn’t like somni planned on going back home anyway.

and that’s when the idea of theft inspired somni for the “better”.

thursday, 24th december  21:23pm

it had been a little over fifteen minutes to haechan’s passing out, when somni had managed to find water from the storeroom of the bookstore. cradling water—ice cold water, to which she flinched first but then overcame the numbness—from the now tilted bottle on her left hand into her right, as she straight up splashed water on his face. and when he didn’t respond to that, panicking, tilted the bottle upside down, the water drenching his face and shirt.

at that, the boy gasped sharply, shooting up straight like, similar to his widened from when he experienced literal ice cubes fall on his skin. the two stared at each other for a minute, haechan in utter shock and somni in relief/concern from recovering from the fact that she didn’t murder.

somni was first to turn away, exhaling breath she didn’t she had held. “thank GOD you aren’t dead! i couldn’t be with another one” “whAT?” “NOTHING!” somni yelled, turning around and standing up to get away quickly from the wet and cold scene. haechan needed a few extra minutes to process the situation before getting to his feet too and following her to the main door.

“what are you doing?” jumping slightly and holding onto her heart, somni rolled her eyes as she took note of his presence and choosing to ignore his question, she continued to try her luck unscrewing the door with a hard covered book. that went on for five minutes before she gave up and clicked her tongue, and went on a search to find another tool.

haechan could only watch her move around, hands behind his back as his eyes rested onto the tops of the dusty bookshelves. “do they seriously not clean those? christ!” he exclaimed, pulling out a tissue from his jean pocket and climbing to reach the top part of the shelf.

a loud thud and hard covered books falling was what brought somni out of her trance from staring at the toolbox, in a dilemma with what to choose, her indecisiveness kicking in at a wrong time. running out to see a haechan piled under heavy looking books, somni stifled a laugh before trying to steady her voice “are you okay??”

to see how true of an evil genius haechan would reveal later to be what somni would come to realization a little late. to somni, haechan was a comforting sign that destruction would still present itself in the oblivious way and it made her feel a little less lonely than she would on the daily. so much comfort that it was almost like he was following her. following her enough to know that she needed a reassurance of the other evil present in the world.

somni would start low, with convenience stores and slowly then work her way up to malls and finally, her one and only love: the bookstore round the corner. the smell of newly fresh printed pages—which she would walk by simply to get motivated with her next convenience store raid—is what somni would call motivation. which is why she was currently trapped in a bookstore, past their closing time (as she knew), with her new bestie<33, the one and the only, lee haechan.

thursday, 24th december  21:57pm

“so what exactly were you doing doing here?” somni let the question hang onto the dry silence that was meant to be broken anyway. the pair moved over to the floor after somni helped and laughed and cleaned the books off him and out of the way. somni having given up on finding a way out at this point, the surroundings being too cold for her to stand solo.

at this haechan pondered for a bit, before answering “i was on the look for this one book, a series of them actually. my aunt asked, to which i’ve already forgotten the title” he paused to roll his eyes and look through his previous messages, presumably from said aunt.

“percy jackson and the olympians” shrugging as he announced, he clicked his phone ‘off’ before looking to somni, who managed to resist a sequel as he confirmed the title. that being understandable as it was her favouritest book of all time! haechan eyed her, eyebrow raising when she covered her mouth, trying her best to hide the grin etching onto her face.

“what’s with your reaction?” “oh it’s just i-” somni started before thinking; why on earth do i have to let him know. he’s just a stranger after all. she didn’t even know his name.

she didn’t even know his name.

“uh what did you say your name was again??” somni raised her brow at the boy, watching his eyes slowly widened a bit realising they hadn’t introduced themselves. he stuck out his hand, a boxy grin present as he introduced himself “i’m lee donghyuck! but everyone calls me haechan because donghyuck’s too….formal for me.” somni nodded once, before reaching out to shake his hand “i’m somni! it’s nice meeting you donghyuck” she winked at him as he groaned, causing her to stick out her tongue playfully at him.

donghyuck grew up in a family of four sisters and one twin brother. the seven of them lived contently with their father’s pay as police commissioner and mother as a lawyer—training currently for magistrate judge. however, their parents were quite conservative with family traditions and obedience. so when one of donghyucks’ older sisters came out to them as pansexual, she was banished from entering the house. this quick and stern change startling the rest and so they started to fulfill and satisfy with whatever their parents wished for them today.

all except donghyuck.

of course he was scared out of wits even at the thought of running away but after his twin convinced him to do it with him, donghyuck trusted him. and so one night, six year old donghyuck ran away. alone. his twin having ditched out of last minute thoughts. finding shelter in a nearby house down the street, turning to the first house he could. the couple thinking he was in trouble decided to take him in. before he knows, he’s staying with them for years and suddenly he’s eighteen and he goes off to his first day of university. 

and then he meets his father.

thursday, 24th december  22:17pm

“why do you even like that book?” haechan asked, a disgusted look taking over his features as somni reached out to smack his leg slightly. “it’s not just a book!! it’s a journey” “jOuRneY” they said in unison, haechan mockingly as he rolled his eyes, chuckling slightly at somni’s offended expression.

since they had no other work to do, the two decided to at least clean the store while haechan was on the lookout for the percy jackson book series his aunt had requested for. somni had let the boy know that she had seen it earlier and was ecstatic to lead the way to them. while she did so, she also rambled on and on about how exciting the books are and how he should give them a try, to which haechan could only ignore.

silence took over after somni had finished summarizing the basic structure of the series when haechan asked the question somni had been dreading to hear “isn’t your family gonna be worried?” minutes of cold emptiness went by before haechan interrupted “uh...hello? are you okay??” he asked, and as somni could see from the corner of eye, worriedly. after taking in her wordless response—and a visible gulp—haechan dropped the question.

“i know mine won’t worry,” he said after a few seconds. “it’s not like they ever did” he muttered looking away. at that, he managed to get somni’s attention and continuing on “my birth parents were quite stern in their ways and so i ran away” somni gawked at this, staring at the nonchalant boy in front of her. “you ran a-away?” haechan nodded.

“when i was six” “wheN YOU WERE SIX?!!?!?” haechan’s heart sped up at her sudden increase in her volume, but nodding nonetheless. “hmm me and my twin decided to just leave. but when the time came, he ditched me so i just left by myself” he paused to search the top shelves for the books. “and obviously they didn’t come after me”.

at that, somni unintentionally reached to touch his arm as a sign of comfort. but soon removed it when haechan looked between her and her hand. sighing, somni internally debated with whether she should tell haechan of her situation or was he still yet to gain her trust. eventually she thought ‘fuck it’ and decided to tell him. what could he possibly do with the information?

somni didn’t exactly have much of a school life seeing how despite her parents paying for her fees three more years after her moving out, she was never one to mingle with people. she’d often keep to herself and just go on with whatever life threw at her. which is why she moved to theft in the first place. in order to provide for herself.

but then she was offered a job. a job at the convenience store she would raid.

having been working there long enough (two ½ years) made stealing easier for her. this way she earned her share of finance and everyday necessities. her boss was a snooze, who’d never glance over at any of the items for more that second, to realise things were missing. and in addition, somni would convince her that it was just selling well, increasing her spirits and faith in the girl. therefore not spare a thought to check cctv rolls.

thursday, 24th december  22:42pm

“i got sent away.” haechan hummed in question, heading slowly turning in her direction as they sat on the carpeted floor of the bookstore. sighing and placing her book page down, somni continued with more confidence “my parents threw my out of the house. and they were right! they had every reason to! but i” her words choked slightly, haechan looking at her with sympathy “i just miss them” she sighed finally looking up at him and after her constant eye contact with the floor, haechan was illuminating from the moon reflecting on him through the small front window.

“i’ve been an absolute brat my entire life and i can only imagine how fed up my parents were of me to actually send me away” her ramble coming to a stop when she couldn’t find words to say. the feeling of emptiness only increasing by the second within her. somni felt her tears fall when she registered haechan’s hand patting her back in reassurance.

she paid him a smile back after inhaling and exhaling to catch her senses back. he smiled back as okay before going back to reading. the precious silence lasted for a while before haechan closed his book and turned to face somni completely. “so how do you live? by yourself?? what do you do for a living? god i just need to know!!” somni raised her brow at the boy in front of her, not choosing to flinch, accustomed to his startling nature.

“well i do live by myself, i still go to school cause my parents pay for it and for a living, i steal”

and then the power tripped.

donghyuck’s new life with his parents was much easier than what he had experienced with his birth family. at first he would still be unfazed with his change in surroundings, asking permission to even go to the bathroom and bowing when the pair would confusingly agree. they would sit him down one day to explain that he needn't ask their permission to tug at their clothes to call them—to which donghyuck would look at the pair astonished at this new world.

and from then on, donghyuk was constantly loved and pampered by the old couple and it was everything he could ask for. he lived a normal life, going to school everyday and then even offering to repay his parents by working shifts at a restaurant after he would turn seventeen.

every once in a while he would run into his siblings around town but he would just walk away. it wasn’t like they were gonna recognize him anyway.

thursday, 24th december  23:24pm

somni froze. haechan had been clinging on to her arm, eyes closed shut and body trembling. his small fit went on for a while, somni being patient and even patting his back awkwardly. “i-i’m a little, tiny bit TERRIFIED of the dark” somni chuckled softly, firmly placing a hand on his back, running it up and down in comfort.

they sat there until somni tapped his hand and reached her own out for him to take “c’mon just take my hand and we’ll go find the power switch okay” haechan nodded, eyes still closed. after successfully standing up, somni walked with dragged haechan to the main switch on the other side of the store. after messing with switches carefully, somni managed to get the light back on.

she clapped her hands excitedly and turned to haechan, who was still hugging her waist. haechan looked up at her and they were close enough to have their noses touching. they stared at each other, either too frozen in place to move. somni faked a cough and cleared her throat, haechan taking the signal and moving away, standing up straight with hot pink cheeks.

friday, 25th december  00:04pm

bored out of their minds, the pair of them moved to lay on the floor, eyes boring holes into the wooden roof of the bookstore. random thoughts running wild at nothing to concentrate on. haechan was first to break the silence, gasping and sitting straight up and looking around at the clock. “it’s christmas!!!” somni soon got up too, beaming at the clock and then at haechan.

“merry christmas donghyuck” she laughed, leaning forward to hug the now sulky boy. “haha merry christmas to you somni.” the hug was soon interrupted by sirens fading into the scene. the two pulled away fast, heads whipping in the direction of the sound.

“we’ve gotta run!” “grab the books you need!” haechan stared at somni in confusion as she stood up to get her desired book. “wait wait. GRAB the books? are you gonna steal them?” somni paused to give him a look of an obvious nod. “you can’t just fucking stea-” “PUT YOUR HANDS UP WHERE I CAN SEE THEM!”

dropping the books in astonishment, the both of them throwing their hands up immediately. they were then assisted outside, shivering when coming in sudden contact with the snowy environment. somni rubbed her arms up and down as a way to provide warmth. looking around for haechan, she saw him handshaking the officer??

“ms. somni, you are under arrest for theft!” somni could not move, feet as frozen as her lips. she called out for haechan who replied with a smirk before walking over to her. “what’s up love?” “whaT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?” “arresting you on the basis of theft?” he said like it was blatantly obvious.

somni gritted her teeth as he winked back at her before turning to walk away. “just wait till i get out lee donghyuk” stopping in his tracks, he turned his head slightly back, “it’s officer haechan to you”

from: nes!! wellllll hi lmao. firstly, this fucking sucks ASS. i didn’t even know what i was writing half way through and i honestly didn’t have the energy to proofread so i apologize for all the grammar mistakes:( wanna lowkey make a part two to this but let me know if this was even liable for a sequel ahhhh. anyway, have a merry christmas and i guess we’re mutuals now;)

[weekendwarriorblog]

The Weekend Warrior 5/7/21: WRATH OF MAN, HERE TODAY, THE UNTHINKABLE, MONSTER, THE WATER MAN and More

It’s a new month, and I guess going by previous years pre-COVID, this weekend would normally be the start of summer. This year, we’re instead getting a summer with a lot of movies that would normally be dumped into April or February or some other uneventful month. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t or won’t be any good movies, but really, there’s nothing that feels like a summer movie until A Quiet Place Part II and Disney’s Cruella open on Memorial Day weekend.

There’s been lots of great developments, though, including the Alamo Drafthouse in Brooklyn reopening this Friday and then in a few short weeks, theaters may be allowed to be open with no capacity rules although social distancing and masks will probably still be in place. Believe me, it’s been a confusing week as the city that got used to being on the backburner when it comes to reopenings, especially with movie theaters, is now dealing with arguing politicians competing to see who could throw open the then most doors fastest. It’s actually pretty embarrassing.

That aside, this week’s The Weekend Warrior column is brought to you by the new album “Coral Island” from Liverpool band The Coral, which I’ve decided to listen to on loop until I finish this column, because it’s taking me so long to get through it. (Eventually, I switched to Teenage Fanclub’s “Endless Arcade,” since I hadn’t had a chance to listen to it yet…. And to an old standby, Royal Blood, with their own excellent new album, “Typhoons.” At least the record business seems to know it’s the summer!)

Before we get to this week’s new movies, a couple tidbits. First of all, I’m thrilled that my friends Larissa Lam and Baldwin Chiu’s documentary FAR EAST DEEP SOUTH can finally be seen by the entire world, or at least the United States. It debuted on PBS World Channel on Tuesday night as part of the “America ReFramed” series, but for the entire month of May until June 3, you can watch it On Demand HERE, and that is huge! (There will be other ways to see it that you can read about here.)

This is an amazing MUST-SEE doc that looks into the little-known Chinese communities that took root in Mississippi in the early 20th Century and how they became such a huge part of that area with their markets, also bonding with the African-American communities that were similarly dealing with racism from the typically white post-Civil War South. It’s not just a history lesson, and it’s an incredibly moving story about a family trying to find its roots in the most unexpected places. There was a good reason why the couple’s short “Finding Cleveland” won the Oxford Film Festival while I was on the jury that year, and Far East Deep South similarly won an award there last year after its World Premiere at Cinequest was almost scuppered by COVID. It’s amazing how much more relevant and important this film has become since I first saw it last year, since both Asians and African-Americans are dealing with serious racial issues, and this movie shows that more than anything, they should be working to boost each other rather than fighting. Do check it out On Demand this month if you get a chance!

Another musician making movies is Mr. Dave Grohl of the Foo Fighters. I mentioned his documentary WHAT DRIVES US last week, but I actually only got to watch it on Thursday, and like his previous film Studio City and HBO mini-series, Sonic Highways, it’s a fantastic look at the music biz, this time through a variety of artists who began their careers by piling into vans and driving around the country. That is, except Lars Ulrich from Metallica, who mentions that the band was never so small or indie that they didn’t have a bus. But Grohl has used his vast connections to bring in a lot of great musicians including The Edge from U2, Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and more, making this a very entertaining movie both for fans of the various bands but also live music fans in general. I gotta admit that as much as I loved What Drives Us, it did bring me down a bit since it’s been almost 14 months since I’ve seen any live music, and I really miss it. This is now streaming on The Coda Collection, which you can subscribe to through Amazon Prime Video.

Guy Ritchie is back with his latest movie, WRATH OF MAN (Miramax/MGM), which reunites him with Jason Statham for the first time since 2007’s Revolver, I believe. Statham plays the enigmatic Paul “H” Hill who works at cash truck company Fortico, responsible for moving hundreds of million dollars around Los Angeles each week. Fortico has recently been hit by a lethal robbery, and H’s team soon learn that there’s a lot more to their new coworker, who happens to be looking for revenge against the man who murdered his son.

(Unfortunately, reviews for the movie are embargoed until Thursday at 6pm, so I can’t tell you whether it’s any good or not. Until Thursday night. Sorry!)

But I will talk about the movie’s box office prospects, because why not? Ritchie’s last movie, The Gentlemen, opened in January 2020, during the “before times,” with $10.6 million, but that was more of a classic Ritchie ensemble crime-comedy. Wrath of Man is more of the type of movie Statham has been making over the past few years, a cross between a revenge thriller and a heist flick. In fact, Statham has done a pretty good job creating his own brand through a variety of action-thrillers as well as a number of franchises including “The Transporter” movies, “The Expendables,” and eventually joining the “Fast and the Furious” franchise as Deckard Shaw with Furious 7 in 2017. Statham then went off to make Hobbs and Shaw with Dwayne Johnson, which didn’t do bad with $174 million. Before that, Statham starred in The Meg, a summer shark attack movie that grossed $145 million. Statham going back to help his old mate i.e. the director that gave Statham his start is pretty huge.

But as I said earlier, those were all in the “before times” and with the box office the way it is, it’s hard to imagine that the exciting reunion of Statham and Ritchie can open with more than $10 million but maybe closer to $8 million, because MGM/UA just doesn’t have the marketing clout of a Warner Bros. or Universal. Even so, that should be enough to be #1 this weekend as both Mortal Kombat and Demon Slayer continue to fall away. Unfortunately, if the movie *is* any good -- and I can’t tell you one way or another -- then by the time reviews hit, people will already have other plans for the weekend than to go see the movie. So yeah, that’s pretty dumb on the part of MGM, huh?

UPDATE: MGM is putting the movie into 2,876 theaters and maybe I'm being overly optimistic, because, as you'll read below, the movie IS pretty good and reviews have remained positive with the American reviews rolling in last night, still at 70% Fresh at this writing. Maybe that'll help the movie do a little better, maybe as much as $9 million, although I'll probably owe MGM an apology if it cracks $10 million, and I don't think it will.

Mini-Review: If you’ve seen the trailer for Wrath of Man, you might go into Guy Ritchie’s latest thinking you know what to expect, because it’s sure being sold as another typical Jason Statham revenge thriller. Don’t be fooled by the marketing, the movie really is Ritchie’s chance to make his own version of Heat, an L.A. heist movie that owes as much to Rashomon as another movie being released this week.

Wrath of Man begins with the heist of an armored truck that turns deadly with the wanton murder of a couple guards. From there, you might think we know where things are going when Statham’s “H” company whose truck was hit, and on his first day, he stops a similar heist by killing the truck’s attackers. H is immediately the hero of the company, although he still has quite a few suspicious coworkers and the feeling is quite mutual. Ritchie’s film then slips into the second episodic chapter which goes back five months to that initial heist where we learn that Statham’s son was killed by being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I don’t want to go too much deeper into how the movie and story play out, because like The Gentlemen and some of Ritchie’s more intricate films, there’s a lot that purposefully isn’t made very apparent at the beginning. To many, this movie will be seen as even more macho than most of Ritchie's films, to the point where even the only woman guard, Dana, being just as macho as the men. As the movie begins, there’s a lot of joke-cracking and crotch-grabbing, all while Statham’s character silently observes and only acts when necessary.

The film’s shift to more of a classic Ritchie ensemble does slowly take place, but by the third chapter, it shifts to the group perpetrating the cash truck heists with an “inside person,” taking the movie to yet another place that makes it more obvious that this is Ritchie’s attempt at delving into the L.A. heist genre that other filmmakers have done so well.

Oddly, Statham doesn’t have too many lines, acting almost like a Terminator in his determination to right wrongs, but as always, Ritchie puts together a fantastic ensemble cast including a number of great American character actors who we rarely get to see in such great roles. I was particularly impressed with Jeffrey Donovan, who has appeared in a number of otherwise forgettable crime films this past year. The same can be said for Holt McCallany as H’s truck driver “Bullet,” but Ritchie also cast the likes of Josh Hartnett and Scott Eastwood in smaller yet still significant supporting roles, all of whom become more interesting as you start figuring out who all the players are.

Like I said, the movie is fairly macho and the few women play very small roles, but it’s how things are set-up in the first few acts to then change course and build to an absolutely amazing third act that will undoubtedly bear comparisons to Heat. And yet Wrath of Man (which is actually based on a little-seen French crime-thriller) does branch away from some of Ritchie’s standards, first of all by being far darker and even more violent with any of the wisecracking humor that pervades a lot of Ritchie’s work to counterbalance such violence disappearing once the flashbacks begin. It’s all punctuated by a fantastically tense score by Christopher Benstead, which seems a bit much at first but eventually settles into the perfect pace and tone for the action.

Despite disappearing for a good chunk of the movie, Statham is still great, basically killing everyone as his characters are wont to do, but watching how all of the different ideas come together leads to such a satisfying conclusion that one hopes those who might be put off, thinking they know where it's going due to the somewhat pathetic and obvious marketing will give it a chance to see how Ritchie has changed gears as effortlessly as he did with Aladdin a few years back.

Rating: 7.5/10

After even a longer time since he directed a movie, Billy Crystal once again takes the helm for HERE TODAY (Sony/Stage6), a movie in which he plays comedy writer Charlie Burns, whose chance encounter with Tiffany Haddish’s lounge singer, Emma Payge, leads to an unlikely friendship, as he struggles with early stage dementia.

I’ve known about this movie for over a year now, and I was pretty excited to finally get to see it, since I was such a fan of the other movies Crystal has directed, 1992’s Mr. Saturday Night and 1995’s Forget Paris, and it’s just amazing to me that he hasn’t directed a movie since.

At first, it seems like it’s the type of meet-cute we’ve seen so much in Crystal’s past filmography, but his pairing with Haddish isn’t something that might work on paper, but in fact, their comic styles mesh so perfectly together that it’s amazing that no one thought of putting them together before.

Crystal wrote the film with comic Alan Zweibel, who adapted it from his own short story “The Prize,” which refers to Haddish’s character winning Charlie in an auction for a lunch. Actually, her ex won the lunch, and she decided to use it because… free lunch! It’s a pretty simple set-up but one that allows the filmmakers to explore some of the odder things that happen in life.

Much of the movie’s humor plays upon the differences between the two characters, and how unexpected their friendship is. I can totally relate, because I have a lot of good long-time friends who most people might never expect us to be friends, but Crystal, Zweibel and Haddish pick up on that and create a movie that’s very funny but has enough other characters around the duo toa allow their characters to show how they’re just really nice people. We see that with how Charlie takes a young writer at his late night show under his wing or how Emma livens up the bat mitzvah of Charlie’s granddaughter. Oh yeah, and Haddish sings. She actually has a number of great performances in the movie, and seriously, anyone who watches this movie is gonna wanna see a smart filmmaker put Haddish in a musical immediately.

The film also acts as a truly touching tribute to Crystal’s friend, the late Robin WIlliams, who was diagnosed with the exact same type of dementia after his suicide death, and knowing that fact, makes the film even more poignant. More importantly, it doesn’t use Charlie’s condition for laughs, and for that alone, I feel like this is ten times better than that overrated Oscar winner The Father.

Here Today’s biggest problems come in the third act when it feels like the movie is starting to over-extend its welcome, even going into somewhat expected places, but it recovers from that rough third act to land a really nice ending. Crystal has always proven himself to be a really strong mainstream filmmaker (ala Rob Reiner and others) who makes crowd-pleasing movies, and it’s so nice seeing him going behind the camera for a movie that’s obviously very personal but also highly relatable.

As far as box office, I certainly have high hopes that Crystal still has an older audience of fans who might want to see him on the big screen again. I’m just not sure if this will be in more than 1,000 theaters, and though I’ve seen quite a bit of marketing, I just haven’t seen Crystal or Haddish do nearly as much in terms of getting out there that would be necessary to reach an audience that might want to venture out into movie theaters to see the movie vs. waiting until it’s on cable/streaming. There’s also Tiffany Haddish’ fanbase, and there could be some benefit for the movie coming out the same week as her new CBS show “Kids Say the Darndest Things.”

I’d love to be optimistic with this making $4 to 5 million but it’s probably more likely to be closer to $3 million especially with capacity limits still in place for most theaters and the audience generally being older.

UPDATE: Maybe I was a little too optimistic, because I enjoyed the movie so much and it will probably be closer to $1 or 1.5 million since other reviews aren't as great.

Next, we have two movies finally being released many years after their festival premieres…

The Swedish apocalyptic thriller THE UNTHINKABLE (Magnet), directed by Victor Danell, is finally being released after playing genre fests in 2018 and 2019. It stars Christoffer Nordenrot as Alex, a young piano virtuoso who ran away from home due to his abusive father Bjorn (Jesper Barkselius). Years later, he returns home for his mother’s funeral after she’s killed in a terrorist attack on Sweden. At the same, there’s a virus that’s erasing people’s memories, but Alex is still in love with Anna (Lisa Henni), the girl he had a crush on when he left, and the three of them will have to help each other face all the horrible things hitting their home at the same time.

As I was watching this movie, a lot of it felt eerily familiar to me, but I couldn’t figure out why. The more I watched it, the more I realized that I actually HAD seen the movie before. Sure enough, I saw this movie over two years ago at the “What the Fest?!” in New York two years ago, and I honestly don’t remember loving it. Still, I decided to give it a fresh look, hoping to get more out of it on second viewing.

Some of the same things bothered me on this second viewing, because it’s really hard to figure out exactly what is going on and whether the horrific events are natural, man-made or a combination of both. For some time, we get so mired into Alex’s lame relationship with Anna, and when he returns home, his conspiracy theory-driven father is busy protecting a bunker that’s being invaded by foreign military troops he thinks are Russians. We cut between these two disparate scenarios while sometimes returning to the capital of Sweden and throwing in a few big set pieces. It’s so disjointed that you feel like you’re watching a lot of random unrelated events, maybe a bit like last week’s About Endlessness -- maybe it’s a Swedish thing?

There are aspects of The Unthinkable that are quite commendable, particularly those action moments and how the mystery about what is happening develops as the film goes along. Eventually, the film does find a more consistent pace, and things start becoming a little clearer, which makes the final act better than much of what we’ve watched earlier. Even so, it’s still quite annoying how long it takes to figure out what’s going on, even on a second viewing, and for most people, that may already be far too frustrating to get through it.

Hitting Netflix on Friday over THREE years after it premiered at Sundance is music video director Anthony Mandler’s directorial debut, MONSTER (Netflix), based on the novel by Walter Dean Myers. It stars Kelvin Harrison Jr. (Waves) as Steve Harmon, a 17-year-old film student put in jail, accused of murder in a bodega robbery. His defense lawyer (Jennifer Ehle) is trying to help him be released, but he’s fighting against the odds of a judicial system that sees him as a “monster” because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I have to be honest that I did go to see this at Sundance the week it premiered, and for whatever reason, I just wasn’t feeling it, so I only really caught about twenty minutes of it. Watching it now with more time and a little less weary than I usually am towards the end of Sundance, I was able to appreciate Monster more for what it is. On the surface, it’s just about Steve’s case and how what really happened unfolds before our eyes and we learn more about those around Steve and how their influence may have pulled a smart and studious young man into the criminal world that now has him in prison with much more violent life-long criminals.

We already knew that Harrison was a great actor, but Monster shows us that he was already on his way to greatness with this movie that for whatever reason got buried even as it dealt with issues that have been in the headlines almost every day since this debuted.

Mandler takes an interesting approach, both non-linear and also with blatant nods to Kurosawa’s Rashomon, which is even cited by Steve’s teacher, played by Tim Blake Nelson. Jeffrey Wright and Jennifer Hudson are decent as Steve’s parents, but they’re generally smaller and non-showy roles compared to the moments between Harrison and Ehle. Much of the film takes place in the courtroom with flashbacks showing what happened through the viewpoint of whomever is on the stand, which eventually includes Steve himself.

The way Mandler handles the material may lean more on the artiness rather than something more mainstream -- Michael B. Jordan’s Just Mercy comes to mind -- but it’s just as powerful in showing how someone like Steve can be othered by society into being a criminal. Sure, there have been other handlings of this sort of material that I thought were better films, but if you know anyone who has ever had dealings with the “justice” system and know how unfair and horrible it can be even to the innocent, then Monster will certainly strike a chord.

Also hitting Netflix this week is the new series based on Mark Millar and Frank Quitely‘s comic books, JUPITER’S LEGACY (Netflix), another kind of twist on the superhero genre ala Amazon Prime Video’s series based on Warren Ellis and Darick Robertson’s The Boys. I love the comics, and I can’t wait to finally get around to seeing Netflix’s first adaptation of a Millarworld property.

David Oyelowo makes his directorial debut with THE WATER MAN (RLJEfilms), a movie about a young boy named Gunner Boon (Lonnie Chavis), whose mother (Rosario Dawson) is battling leukemia. In an effort to cure her, Guner goes off on a journey along with a teenage girl named Jo (Amiah Miller) to find the mythical Water Man, who can provide them with a magic token that might save Gunner’s mother’s life.

I’ve interviewed Oyelowo a few times before, and I really like him a lot, so I had really high hopes for him as a director since I feel he’s just a terrific actor. Unfortunately, the material here is just not strong enough that I think even a far more experienced filmmaker could make something out of it.

Set in PIne Hills, we meet Gunner, a bright kid who loves drawing comic books, but he has trouble connecting with his father (Oyelowo), so when he has an idea that might help his sick mother, he goes off with a head-strong teen named Jo, in search of the Water Man, a summertime adventure permeated by a lot of very bad low-budget visual effects.

Honestly, I’m not even sure where to begin with where The Water Man falters, because Oyelowo has such a great cast, including Alfred Molina and Maria Bello in tiny parts. The story is a problem, as is the writing, which is just so bland and dull, that there’s really nothing in Oyelowo’s direction or any of the performances that really can salvage it. Neither of the child actors have much charisma or personality, and even Dawson’s performance, which would normally be a showstopper is repeatedly lessened by the constant cutting back to the kids. (And as someone who beat leukemia myself, I’m never a fan when cancer is depicted in movies as a death sentence rather than just another hurdle in life that needs to be overcome.)

Oyelowo himself may be one of his generation’s best actors, but he brings so little to the role of Gunner’s father, maybe to not take away from his younger star, but it hurts that he doesn’t do more to create a stronger conflict by making the character more horrible to drive Gunner away. The actual Water Man doesn’t improve things when he finally shows up, essentially talking like a pirate but not even remotely paying off.

Honestly, The Water Man seems like such a misguided venture -- Exec. Produced by Oprah, no less -- and it might have been totally forgettable if the characters didn’t keep saying the title of the movie every five minutes.

Hitting theaters Friday after a festival run is Tran Quoc Bao’s action-comedy THE PAPER TIGERS (WELL GO USA), starring ALain Uy, Ron Yuan and Mikel Shannon Jenkins as martial artists once known as “the three tigers but now middle-aged men must set aside old grudges and dad duties to avenge the murder of their teacher. I’ve had a screener of this since last summer when it played at Fantasia Festival in Montreal, and I just never got around to watching it, but if I’m able to squeeze it in before the weekend, check back here for my review.

Streaming on Shudder this Friday is Ryan Kruger's South African comedy-thriller FRIED BARRY (Shudder), starring Gary Green as Barry, a violent street junkie who is abducted by aliens who take over his body in order to… well, actually… they do a lot of drugs, have a lot of sex and other craziness. It’s a pretty strange and bizarre movie that reminds me a little of movies like a lower-fi Under the Skin or Beyond the Black Rainbow, and much of it is driven by the insane and unique performance by Green and the odd characters he encounters that I think will find its fans for sure, but it will definitely be for a very select audience of genre festival fans, as this is by no means a mainstream genre film.

Speaking of which, another movie out this week which I wasn’t allowed to see in advance is Gia Coppola’s MAINSTREAM (IFC Films), starring Maya Hawke as a young woman seeking internet stardom by making YouTube videos with a charismatic stranger, played by Andrew Garfield, until “the dark side of viral celebrity threatens to ruin them both.” Yup, it’s one of THOSE movies. It also stars Nat Wolff, Jason Schwartzman and Johnny Knoxville, but I haven’t heard anything good about it, and I’m not sure my curiosity is piqued enough to spend any of my own personal money to check it out.

Hitting Amazon on Friday is the doc THE BOY FROM MEDELLIN (Amazon) from Matthew Heineman (City of Ghosts, Cartel Land), a portrait of musical superstar J. Balvin, as he prepares for a massive sold-out stadium show in his hometown of Medellin, Colombia, which is hindered by the growing civil unrest in the area.

Lots of other movies this week, but a few that i just wasn’t able to get to this week, including:

ABOVE SUSPICION (Lionsgate) INITIATION (Saban Films) ENFANT TERRIBLE (Dark Star Pictures) QUEEN MARIE (Samuel Goldwyn Films) SILO (Oscilloscope) CITIZEN PENN (Discovery+)

That’s it for this week. Next week, Chris Rock and Samuel L. Jackson star in SPIRAL: FROM THE BOOK OF SAW (Lionsgate) and Angelina Jolie returns for the thriller THOSE WHO WISH ME DEAD (New Line) and Timur Bekmambetov’s thriller, PROFILE (Focus Features). That’s right. This will be the first weekend in over a year where we’ll have three or maybe even four new wide releases.

[doof-doofblog]

"How Do You Sleep At Night?!"

Thursday 8th April 2021

Hello again folks! We're back with another episode in my attempt to catch up, of course there was not an episode on Friday evening due to the passing of His Royal Highness Prince Philip - but that does mean that Monday was given two episodes! (Feeling slightly stressed with the amount of episodes I need to catch up on!) Plus being back at the day job and trying to save for a house is proving a bit stressful - but I want to let you all know I am committed to sticking to this blog, I've been at it for over a year so why should I stop now?!

I'll try my very best to catch up through out the week, but my post may have to be posted late in the evening, just a heads up incase you guys think I'm not posting! Anyway, let's get right to it and focus on the matter at hand, I'm going to begin first with mentioning Bailey, it turns out that Bailey has actually won the competition she applied for with the school, but she hasn't had the heart to inform her family about the win, knowing they won't be able afford the cost of her going to her expedition.

Unfortunately, as Bailey and her Dad are out taking little Banjo out for a walk, Isaac happens to congratulate Bailey on her win, much to Mitch's surprise. As Mitch begins to question his daughter, she admits that the hotel would cost them £200 and £30 for the coach trip. Mitch tries his absolute best to persuade his daughter not to worry and informs her that he will find the money some how for her go to on her trip. But as Mitch walks away leaving Bailey alone with little Banjo, she happens to notice the flyer advertising Banjo as lost dog "Ziggy"!

As devastating as it is for her, Bailey knows that she has do to the right thing and give Banjo back to his rightful owner. She get's Bernie to help her contact the owner and they arrange to meet up in the park. Only Bernie makes up a story about finding him behind some bins - I don't know about you guys but the dog didn't seem happy to see it's owner, you'd think it would recognise it's owner by sense of smell?! Personally, I believe the dog is actually more happy living with the Taylor's, even the girl could tell that the dog had been looked after. It's then that Bailey admits that they've been looking after the dog for a couple of weeks but had no idea that he was a lost dog. As the girl takes her dog and walks away, without a second glance at Bernie, for a split second the dog looks back at Bailey and Bernie, and I don't know why but for some reason, I am hoping the dog will be reunited with the Taylor family again, I'd like to think that we haven't seen the last of this adorable pup!

--

The second thing I have to focus on is Sharon and the arrival of her long lost half-brother, Zack! It look as if after his very much unwelcoming arrival to the Square, Zack slept in his car overnight outside of Sharon's apartment, regardless of Sharon making it perfectly clear to him that she didn't want him around and instructed him to go home! As Zack gets out of his car he pleads for his sister just hear him out, he claims he's not here for anything and wants anything from her, he just simply wants to talk.

However, when Jay approaches acknowledging the look of Zack's car, Zack almost insults Jay, warning him not to touch his car. As much as innocent as the situation was, I think his insult to Jay was a bit uncalled for, and it also gives an insight to his character, even Sharon makes a comment to him about interreacting with the locals. But in an attempt to make it up to her, he suggests taking her for breakfast so they can at least sit down and get to know each other.

Things seem to go well it seems at first, they begin to discuss Gavin and how each of them spent their childhood, it seems that they have some kind bond when it comes to discussions about their biological Dad, even though Sharon was adopted, her memories of Gavin aren't necessarily nice ones, but neither are Zack's and unfortunately, Gavin did bring him up! It appears that they are actually getting along. But as Kheerat walks in, Sharon begins to apologise to him for missing their date, but even then Zack's attitude towards the locals still doesn't impress Sharon, especially when he claims to Kheerat that Sharon can do better than him. But whilst Sharon still tries to arrange a second date with Kheerat, Zack discreetly nicks a pair of keys from Sharon's handbag!!! Doesn't appear to be the doting new brother does he?!

Later as Sharon is alone sorting out things for the gym, Jean approaches her with a bunch of flowers as a way of an apology for causing damage to her gym equipment, but luckily Sharon gives her the good news that she was in fact insured for all the damages. As Jean breathes a sigh of relief she compliments how things are slowly coming together, but when she happens to mention Sharon getting along with brother and mentioning that she saw Zack entering her flat, Sharon is instantly on the march to find out what her brother is up to!

Clearly, Zack is looking for something, he pretty much turns her apartment upside down and he searches high and low for something. Also I have to mention how I never realised that Sharon is now staying in the apartment that Mick and Linda were briefly staying in before they returned to the Vic! It's almost like they've simply swapped properties! Eventually Sharon finds her brother searching deep in her wardrobes, calling out to him and claiming that she knows exactly what he's after. It turns out that Gavin left Sharon a box, but the funny thing is, he left Zack the key to open it - so maybe he wanted his two children to meet one day?! As they both agree that whatever lays inside the box they'll go halves on, with hope they open the old metal black box. Unfortunately all that it holds inside is papers and memories such as old birthday cards, Zack is clearly angered - was he hoping for something else? Was there something more he was hoping to get his hands on?!

As they come to terms with the fact there was nothing of value in the box, Zack begins to reminisce about his Dad, recalling about a time when he made him fairy cakes but his Dad showed no sense of pride and informed his son not to embarrass him again, Sharon begins to feel a sense of compassion for her brother. I guess it's fair to say they've never had it easy when it's come to their parents - biological or adoptive. She opens up to Zack, informing her about her son Dennis and admits that maybe it would be nice to have a brother around? It looks as if there's some mutual ground between them, could this be the start of a powerful sibling relationship?!

--

Meanwhile, it looks as if Kush is having deep concerns about Ruby bringing up his son, Arthur. Poor Arthur has been dragged from pillar to post, losing his Mum, moving out of his Nan's to live with his second Dad and Stepmum. As little Arthur kicks a football about on his own, Kush admits to Whitney that little Arthur has spoken about shouting accruing whilst he's been staying with Ruby and Martin. Of course Kush trusts Martin with his son, but his biggest concern is Ruby.

In an attempt to build bridges and maybe find out a bit more, Kush takes it upon himself to visit Ruby alone. I think he spoke to Ruby in a very adult and mature way, he didn't go in all guns blazing and acknowledged that it must be hard with having 3 children suddenly to look after, especially considering the loss they have both been through, it's expected that sometimes parenting can get the better of you. Parenting isn't easy, that's for sure. He does however voice his concerns for Arthur and whether he wants him to be around raised voices.

But as much as Kush is being polite and reasonable, Ruby seems to think that he's attacking her, personally, and if Martin was present he wouldn't be voicing his concerns to Ruby. But the fact is that Kush knows exactly what Ruby is capable of and states that he can fill Martin in if he was pushed far enough, but Ruby calls his bluff - knowing full well that he wouldn't, simply because of his son! Ooooo I know it's coming, but I can't wait for Ruby to get her comeuppance! What do you guys think?!

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Lastly, Kat and Phil are still sneaking about, it looks as if Kat had actually spent the night at the Mitchell household. Even though she's cautious of being seen, Phil informs her that Ben and Callum are aware of their romance and are happy for them to be seeing each other. Kat seems surprised by this news, it seems that she is deeply concerned about what people would say if they were to find out. I think it's perfectly clear that both Phil and Kat aren't quite ready to go public yet.

But, if they were to go public, what would they be going public as? A couple?! Friends With Benefits? Who knows? As far as Kat is concerned, they haven't had "The chat" - and everyone knows what she means by that! Whether their fling is something casual or whether it's leading to something more serious? I mean, at first it probably was just a bit of fun, but it's seems to be escalating as time goes on. Does Kat maybe want more from Phil than just fun and a romp? Are there feelings slowly growing for each of them?!

Later on, as Kat is doing her shopping in the Minute Mart, she happens to overhear Phil on the phone booking a couple's holiday away, from the sound of it, it sounds very romantic, a sea view cabin in a glorious destination! Poor Kat, she instantly assumes that Phil is booking them an exotic get away and instantly grabs a bottle of sun lotion! As the day progresses, Kat eventually finds Phil alone in the Arches and shows off the sun lotion that she's bought, asking him to wipe some on her back. At first, Phil seems to think she's joking, but as it comes clear that Kat believes they're going on holiday together, Phil puts her straight claiming that the holiday he has booked is actually a honeymoon for Ben and Callum.

Poor Kat instantly feels completely humiliated. Is she wanting to actually enter a proper relationship with Phil or is she getting the feeling that this fling is going nowhere? Everyone knows that Phil isn't the romantic type, but of course he was doing a nice gesture his son on his fiancé. I guess it's fair to say that Phil and Kat don't want their relationship to become public, but they still want to be together - whether that means intimately, emotionally - it could mean everything. Phil actually admits that he actually does like Kat and in a attempt to make it up to her, he suggests they go for meal, just the two of them.

Kat smiles, admitting that he's not exactly Shakespeare, but she's happy to finally be going somewhere with Phil other than the bedroom. Later on in the evening as Kat and Phil go their separate ways, Kat opens her front door to find a bunch of flowers left on her wall, reading the tag on the flowers she realises they're from Phil, maybe there is a romantic side to him after all?! Only, as Whitney witnesses Kat laughing on the phone to an unknown male, gushing over the bunch of flowers, she approaches her claiming that while Kat appears to be enjoying herself, Kush's life is on the line, he's facing prison simply because of Kat! She can't seem to understand why Kat seems to have forgotten about Kush's sacrifice to save his family.  

Quite an interesting episode, once again, a lot of different things happening at once, but I'm really excited to see what happens next! I'm going to try and catch up as much as I can this week, but I want to thank you all for being incredibly patient with me! It really means the world! Thank you for your on-going support and I'll be back again very soon! Enjoy the rest of your day! Love you all xXx

[abrunettefangirlnerd]

It’s Too Much

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader

Summary: You are a college student trying to get into nursing school. Being accepted into NYU’s program you just have to make the grade in one more class to start in the fall. This semester has been difficult and only gotten worse since this COVID-19 required your college to close. Living on campus and your family living in Colorado, makes moving back home extremely difficult. Besides you don’t want to leave. That is when your sweet boyfriend offered for you to stay at his apartment.

Oneshot

A/N: It may be a little long, but the ending is freaking adorable

10:15 pm

             Putting away the last bit of your clothes in Steve’s closet, you sigh in relief. Today has been so long starting with waking up early to move all your stuff out of your dorm. Your college has moved all classes online with the COVID-19 outbreak. Since there is virtually no reason to be at school, you decided to move out to get a reimbursement for the rest of the semester.

             Problem is, your school is in New York and your home is St. Louis, Missouri. There is no way for you to get everything in your car and drive half way through the country. Thankfully Steve, your boyfriend, has been gracious enough to share his apartment with you for the remainder of your semester.

             A warm-muscular arm wraps its way around your waist and pulls you toward an even more muscular body. Turning your body to face him, you burry your face in Steve’s chest as you wrap your arms around his torso. Steve places a soft kiss on the top of your head before leaning his against yours. Feeling the light brush of his breath against your hair lures your subconscious to the impending darkness of sleep.

“Do you want to go to bed?” Steve ask. A smile invades your features. You love how attentive he can be.

“No,” you pout. “Going to bed means waking up, and waking up means studying.”

             Steve’s grip on your loosens, prompting you to look up at him. A twinkle of mischief resides in his beautiful blue eyes. A part of you wants him to tell you what he is thinking, though it may be more fun for him to show you.

“I have an idea then.” Steve smirks.

             His arms encircle your legs before you could ask him what he’s up to. Throwing you over his shoulder he walks you over to the bed, and flips your body onto the soft mattress. Laughter erupts from your chest. You find it so cute when he acts so dominant because he surprisingly loves being submissive a great deal of the time. Though seems like tonight he wants to take the reins, and you are more than happy to let his dominant side take over tonight.

***

Next Morning

Inulin can determine glomerular filtration rate in the renal system because it is only filtered, not reabsorbed or secreted…

Mean arterial pressure can be calculated by taking systole + 2 (diastole) / 3…

Trypsin, chymotrypsin, and elastin are endopeptidase enzyme…

             You woke up, your thoughts running a million miles an hour. Looking over at Steve’s alarm clock you see that it reads 5:45 am. Well, I usually wake up at 6, what is 15 minutes really?

             Carefully shimmying out of Steve’s arms, you grab a new pair of underwear, and a fresh pair of sweats and t-shirt from Steve’s side of the closet. Heading over to the bathroom down the hall you turn on the water, wait for it to heat up, and step inside.

             Lathering your head with citrus smelling shampoo, you make a mental note of all the things you need to do today. A sheet of anxiety wraps around your body like a tight uncomfortable blanket. Taking deep breaths you try to focus on the warm water. Imagining it melt away the anxiety from your body, you begin to feel better. Before you know it, the last bit of body soap has been washed away and it is time to get out and start your day.

             Quickly getting dressed in Steve’s soft and warm clothes you head into the kitchen to make breakfast. Popping a bagel into the toaster, you search for some fruit in the refrigerator. Finally coming upon some cut up fruit, you take the container out and pour some on your plate. About that time your bagel is ready to go and all you need is your coffee. Tasting the warm-stimulating hazelnut coffee against your throat, you take a deep breath and dive into your studies

6:15 am

             Opening your laptop, you guide your mouse to a folder holding the rest of your physiology lecture videos. Your professor had his lectures recorded a few years back and thankfully saved them. Without these, you have no idea how challenging the last half of this semester would be.

             Scrolling through the list, you land upon the next video lecture. Waiting for the video to load, you take a sip of our coffee and plug in your headphones. Steve is an early morning riser but is definitely taking the opportunity to sleep in given the new situation. The last thing you want is to wake him up with your school work. He deserves to sleep in every once in a while.

7: 25 am

             Writing down the last bit of notes from the lecture, you look up and see that your breakfast has barely been touched. The bagel has a single bite and only half of the fruit remains. The floors creek behind the bedroom door signaling that Steve has woken up.

             As if on cue the door opens revealing a half asleep posture. Hearing him yawn you look up and offer a morning smile. As he heads into the kitchen for his own cup of coffee, you refocus on rewriting notes from the recent lecture. You have this rhythm down after the first couple weeks of the semester. After class you would rewrite the notes, neatly into a notebook and study them the next day.

“Want some breakfast?” Steve asks.

“I made me some.” You tilt your head toward you cold bagel and coffee and get a disapproving look from your boyfriend.  

8:00 am

             Taking out your laptop again, you log into your school’s blackboard account. You watch as the computer loads your Nutrition book as a yawn of your own settles across your lips. This is your least favorite class of the semester. It has nothing to do with the content. There is just so much of it and your teacher’s lectures are not helpful whatsoever.

“How about a break?” Steve looks up at you with puppy dog eyes, his head against your shoulder. “You just had to wear my clothes, you’re killing me.”

“Not yet, it is only eight in the morning. And I have to keep you entertained somehow.” A pinching feeling hits you in the gut as you think about taking Steve’s advice. You had the same problem while living in the dorm. You never take breaks unless you can’t see straight or it is time for bed, whichever comes first. Of course there were plans you would make with Steve that would take place of a break.

9:30 am

             Finally finishing the chapter for Nutrition, you head back into the kitchen. You throw away the rest of your uneaten breakfast and grab another pot of coffee. Taking in the precious smell you can feel your stomach start to growl from missing the other half of breakfast. You decide there isn’t enough time to make anything, and figure the coffee will just be enough.

“Hon,” Steve’s cautious voice looms over you. You can tell he is trying to tread lightly. He means well, but neither of you have been in this situation where you are living together.

“(Y/N), maybe you should eat something else.”

“It’s okay. I’ll be fine, thank you though.” You place a reassuring kiss on Steve’s cheek and then head into the living room again.

          The pinching gut feeling returns as you think about Steve’s expression. Maybe I should take a break? You shake your head and conclude you will take one later.

10:05 am

             The simulation for your physiology lab has finally loaded. Your professor for lab has ten lab simulations due this week by Thursday. With all the packing, moving, and unpacking this weekend you haven’t had the chance to get ahead of this. By Wednesday you have to take an online prelab quiz and be prepared to take a post lab quiz at the end of class on Thursday. Since it is all online now you have to definitely zero out time to get it all done on your own.

             Steve comes in with a plate in hand. On it is a piece of toast with a Nutella spread and banana slices nicely resting on top. Involuntarily, your mouth begins to water at the sight of food. Some find it a weird combination but you think it is the best thing you’ve found to eat in a while.

“Here, I made you this.”

             He places the plate of your physiology lab notebook. A tiny bit of annoyance restless onto your surface but you push it away. You know that Steve just wants to make sure you’re eating enough. At the beginning of last semester Steve noticed how little you started to eat with your added stress. This semester isn’t much better, but this way he at least gets to keep a better eye on you. You’ve never had a problem with your appetite. There is just so much on your mind, and so much stress that you barely remember to eat. When you do, it doesn’t take long for your nerves to get the better of you and suppress the want to keep eating.

“Thank you.” You say, and you snake your arm around his neck and bring him in for a kiss.

12:10 pm

“Okay, lunch time!” You claim, excited for a break. “How does a pizza sound?”

             Steve is in the corner of the room working out with his weights. Taking a moment from his current set, Steve nods in agreement. You find a small but noticeable grin hiding against his lips. He is clearly happy to see that you have finally taken a break… well a break to make food.

             The only pizza you guys have is a veggie and chicken frozen pizza. Taking it out of the wrapping, you preheat the oven and wait for it to beep. This moment allows you to turn on the tv and find “Friends” on the screen, your favorite show of all time. Steve crawls up against you even with sweat dripping off onto you.

“Babe! You’re dripping all over the pizza!” You laugh.

“Extra flavor?” Steve’s eyes glimmer as he represses his own laughter.

             After lunch you get back on your computer to log onto your Old Testament/Hebrew Bible class. After the class you organize your notes, work on your paper for the class, and review your notes from both physiology lecture and lab. It isn’t until 6 o’clock that evening before you are done. A friend from a class called needing you to explain something from the lecture today which took a little while.

**

             This routine repeated over and over during this week. Steve recognizes that there was no way this is going to change unless he said something. Though the last thing he wants to do is upset you. He knows how stressed you are about getting into the nursing program. You have a spot actually. You just need to get a B in physiology to keep it, and the first exam did not go as planned.

But Steve does know this isn’t healthy. You are ranging between 7-9 hours of work, with only an hour break at lunch to cook and eat. He would love to offer to cook for you, but he is scared that you’ll take that extra time to keep studying.

“Baby doll?” Steve peers around the corner leading into the living room. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Sure, one second. I just need to finish writing this thought.” You say as you scribble a few more notes in your notebook.

             Steve comes over and sits on the coffee table in front of you. He helps you move your school stuff away. You knit your eyebrows together in confusion. Normally you aren’t done for the day, it is only 4:30 pm.

             Steve’s knees lightly press against yours and he takes your hands in his. Rubbing circles into your skin with his thumbs you allow the soothing touch to calm your nerves. Steve leans in and presses a kiss to your forehead that you graciously accept.

“What’s up? You’re scaring me.” You say. A sinking feeling rests in your stomach that are sending your nerves in to a frenzy.

“I love you (Y/N). I love having you hear, but…” you can feel your heart drop. “I am worried about you. All you do is study. I’m sure this is what you’ve been doing this last year but I didn’t realize how much you do until now. You’re too tired to want to work out like you normally do, or able to stay awake while we are watching a movie. On top of that, you barely eat. It’s not healthy.”

“I know, you’re right.” A tear falls down your face. “Living in the dorm I never felt like I could get away from school. I felt like I had to constantly study. When I stayed the night here it would help me separate it easier. Though since I can’t leave, and some of my professors have added extra assignments I’m feeling it becoming a bigger problem than before.”

“Well, then.” Steve’s soft lips graze across yours, taking your breath away. “Let me help with that.”

             Pulling you on his lap, Steve’s fingers tangle in your hair. Steve presses his forehead against yours and both sets of eyes close. Stroking his hands through your hair, you focus on Steve’s breathing. You can’t believe you are lucky enough to find a man that actually cares about your well-being. He is right and you know it. From now on you’re going to do your best to not let school be your whole life.

“You know what I want to do?” Your voice is barely above a whisper.

“If you say study,” Steve grumbles, “I’m throwing your notebooks out the window.”

              Shaking your head no, you start by placing a kiss on Steve’s cheek. Trailing down his face onto his neck, Steve grips your hips which brings your body closer. Steve does not understand how great of an advantage he just gave you, and you try to suppress the smile peaking up from your lips. Wrapping your arm around his torso, you wait a moment before reaching behind him. Finding what you are looking for, you bring your lips back to his. Eagerly accepting your kiss he almost doesn’t feel the nerf bullet hit his side.

“Oh no,” Steve’s voice is low and you can feel your heart beat faster. “You’ve done it now.”

             Stumbling to get away, you leap over the back of the couch for cover. Peering over the edge you aim your nerf gun where you last see him, but Steve is already gone. You listen for any sudden movements and try to recall where the other gun was last seen. Remembering it was in the bedroom, you stealthily slide across the floor hoping for another sneak attack.

             Reaching the door, you find it cracked open. You slip your body slowly into the dark room and reach for the light switch. If Steve is hiding, you want to find him before he finds you. The lights turn on and brighten up the room, making your eyes squint.

“Surprise!” Steve jumps from the side of the bed as you feel two nerf bullets attack your abdomen. “I win!”

“But I got you first!” You playfully whine.

“Doesn’t count.” Steve insists. “I win, and I want first place prize.”

             Steve takes even strides toward you. Stopping in front of you, his body towers over your own. His arms pin you against the wall as his wild eyes peer into yours. A burning desire of anticipation ripples through your chest. It is almost too much to bare until Steve finally crashes his lips to yours. Running your hands over his body, and his over yours, you lead him toward the bed and show him how lucky you are to have him.

[veryfineday]

Tuesday 26 April 1825

6 1/2

11

L  +  L

went into the stable – gave Hotspur oat cake – read a little of Rousseau confession volume 1 and read over, and sent my letter (written yesterday) to miss Henrietta Crompton (‘micKlegate yorK’) – ‘to believe the French ladies, or the ladies of any country superior in anything to my country women is not much my creed – But, perhaps, with all my yorKshireism about me, I am not a fair judge – I grant, the palm of victory in dress must grace the temples of the gallic fair; but a well-bred, travelled Englishwoman is still my summit of perfection who has caught ‘the manners living as they rise,’ is still my summit of perfection – the style of English elegance suits me better than that of French; it is more dignified, and seems to me more purely angel-liKe, than all that finished coquetry, – that ‘charm that lulls to sleep – French mannerism, French tact at conversation are certainly striKing; but, taKen nationally, give me the manners, customs, hearts, and minds of our own country before those of every other country that the pen of Traveller has described – It would be invidious to particularize, but I have seen may girls in our YorK assembly rooms, who, after spending a couple of winters in good society in Paris, might not be deemed inferior in aught to their so vaunted rivals’ § –

[margin: e.g. miss georgiana. MarKham, miss Elizabeth Fairfax, etc.]

In answer to miss H-[Henrietta] C-’s[Crompton’s] observation that ‘the society’ at Nice ‘is chiefly composed of noblesse’, say it is not surprising on considering ‘the tons singular nature of French titles’ § – observe how they are distributable by a father to his children – (I ought to have said his sons) – say the father of my young friend was a marquis and she, tho’ having no title, bears the coronet and supporters of the marquisate de Sans – Had before mentioned her as ‘my young friend of Bordeaux, of one of the best famous in France’ – that she, too, sighed for Paris, as seemed to do all the French world – the Parisians would tell her (miss H.C-[Henrietta Crompton]) ‘Il n'y a que Paris – demeurer en province, c'est une autre chose’ –

concluded my letter with acco an account of the fashions – which my aunt seemed last night to wonder at my being able to give so well, never dreaming of my noticing these matters so narrowly – § a lady’s dress always strikes me, if good or bad – In the answer to had I read the memoirs of madame de Genlis or the Viscomte d’Arlincourt’s Ipsiboe, I said ‘no! the very little time I had for reading in Paris, was not given either to memoirs or romances; but, I thinK, the readers of the former talKed more of madame Campan than madame de Genlis; and those of the latter talKed more of sir Walter Scott and Lord Byron (translated into French, – the veriest curiosities you ever saw) than anything else’ § –

wrote the above of this morning and went down to breakfast at 9 40/60 – came upstairs again at 10 3/4 – Read my letter from mrs. James Dalton croft Rectory – 3 pp.[pages] and the ends and under the seal – very Kind letter – from 11 1/2 to 4 3/4 wrote 3 pp.[pages] and the ends to miss m-[Marsh], and 3 pp.[pages] to mrs. Belcombe thinKing it civil and attentive to inquire after Dr. B-[Belcombe] 

chit-chat to miss m-[Marsh] nothing about Paris, except a slight mention of having resumed my former habits at home and that as to my ‘nearly eight month’s absence’... ‘if I remember it all, tis but as a morning dream from which one waKes without a thought of sorry or surprise’ – speaKing of the great inprove[ments ‘made, maKing, and to be made in yorK’.... ‘this gives me pleasure – I am always glad to hear of the prosperity of my own county-capital, endeared to me by a thousand associations which pass not away, but which, as Time drives off the ligher things that rest upon my memory, sinK but the deeper, to remain for ever’ – § mentioned madame Galvani’s 3 pictures – ‘they are the property of an Italian who, I believe, would taKe twelve hundred francs for them – Have the goodness to mention this to your brother..... I have seen the picture, and would buy them myself, could I consistly spare the money for such a purpose’.... ‘I pretend not to news of things hereabouts – I Know none – The vale of Shibden is racluse recluse to me; and I have less and less time to stir beyond its precincts’ –

Kind inquiries after Dr. B-[Belcombe] ‘it will never be either from forgetfulness, or want of interest, that I do not send you the written word of my anxiety for the welfare, and success of whatever concerns you’ –... ‘I have not near expect to have tidings from Mariana – I merely Know that she has been hurried about from pillar to post, – from BerKeley castle to the Lord Knows where, and that she thinKs herself better for the Cheltenham waters – mr. C. L-’s[Charles Lawton’s] plans are always so uncertain, – so liKe shifting sands the sport of every wind and tide, – that it never once occurs to me to try to calculate them at all – I Know that they are chances to which ever the doctrine of chances can hardly be applied; and my mind leaves them, liKe a parcel of stray atoms, to your own fortuitous jumble’ –

went out at 5 – met mr. Sunderland at the door come to see my aunt – He had Known gouty patients have that spasmodic motion of the diaphragm before, and so well – detained 1/4 hour – then went down the fields to Lower brea – went into the house for a few moments to arrange about having one of their carts to lead us some clay tomorrow if fine – Settled with the gardener to begin his job at the foot path on Thursday – william Green led 5 loads of stones to say from Shepherd’s – shot them at the Tilley holm style for fear of cutting Pearson’s field –

got home at 6 1/4 – dressed and sat down to dinner at 6 3/4 – In the evening wrote the last 21 lines of today – Rainy day till 2 p.m. – then fine afternoon – rain came on on again a little after 7 – liKely to be much rain again tonight – Barometer 3 1/2 degree below changeable Fahrenheit 46º at 9 55/60 p.m. at which hour came up to bed –

[risthebrave]

okay so i was going to send in an ask for the director’s cut thing, but there were too many fics i wanted to ask about 😭 i’ll send them in but PLEASE keep in mind you don’t have to do them all i feel bad dmfjsjf

move so pretty (you’re all i see), sleeping on our problems, works like a charm, just a flicker in the dark, and sweet like honey

ahhh omg thank you for sending these in! i’m so sorry for how long it took to get out - i may have forgotten about it shjkskss also i don’t mind talking about all of them but i’m definitely going to keep each one short. you can find them under the cut:

move so pretty (you’re all i see) ~

this fic was started initially when i was doing word prompts using curiouscat! people would send me words and i’d write a quick little drabble/snippet... they’re typically around 300-ish words but i got the word “owns,” and maybe got a bit carried away? i think that prompt ended up being 1k words - too long to post using cc so i had to take screenshots and post as separate tweet. 

the idea that came to me was something i love to read in fics: one of them walking in on the other masturbating. i didn’t intend for it to become anything more than that snippet but i what can i say? i got intrigued. my brain helpfully provided a backstory: best friends, harry maybe having feelings for louis but not wanting to ruin their friendship... 

fast-forward three days and i posted an 11k fic shjssks

this was my first attempt at writing a pwp so that was an interesting experience!!! i’m too obsessed with giving backstories and arcs to ever write just pure smut but this is the closest i’ve gotten??? 5.5k/11k being smut, that is. and for once coming up with the title wasn’t too hard because there’s one song i always think of when it comes to best friends to lovers and that’s lucky!! 

i don’t really know what else to say for this one! i remember sarah and i both wrote and posted pwps in a short span of each other so that was fun... she’s actually the one who motivated me to finish and post this fic instead of just letting the idea go. and her dog ended up in the story: chica <3 my absolute favorite <3333

sleeping on our problems ~

welp. this fic was a struggle for a long time. idk if i’ve talked about it on this blog but this fic was initially an exes to lovers fic!!! where they spent harry’s rut together right before breaking up and then louis finds out he’s pregnant and angst ensues. 

changing it to a one-night stand (even though it wasn’t only one night shjksks) ended up being a really good decision in the way that this new version of the story required a lot less angst and reflection of their past relationship, choices, actions!! that first fic was going to be a lot heavier i think shjsks but i really love how it turned out!!

barring the main tropes, the progression of the story and the outline itself changed so. much. in the process of writing... i found an earlier saved version of my outline and the story is almost completely unrecognizable haha. and actually the most recent saved version of the outline is also not 100% accurate to the final story because for the last 10k of the story, i was flying completely free shjsksk. 

also, even after i finished the fic, i went back and added two scenes the next day so it’s safe to say i changed so much of this story -- it was never supposed to be that long either hsjsksk the goal was 48-50k and i thought i was being optimistic!

somewhat in the same vein but also really different: this fic was one of the first fics i ever wrote out of order! before this, i had switched around maybe a couple times when writing a fic but mostly stuck to chronological order. but in this one i kept getting stuck with certain scenes and decided that i’d never reach my goal of finishing unless i switched to parts of the story i had the inspiration to write in the moment instead of getting stuck on one single part i had no motivation for. it really helped the process and i’ve been switching around ever since. 

another thing that really helped me actually finish this fic was the motivation and encouragement of people on twitter and i’m still so appreciative of it now :’) there’s no way i could have finished this fic without the kind words and well wishes of my mutuals!!

(also - i included an easter egg in this fic from another one of my fics... i suppose that’s sort of the type of insight that fits for these things? the ballet louis and harry saw in new york was swan lake <3)

works like a charm ~

ooo i wrote this fic for my friend’s birthday!! she loves hp aus and slytherin hl so it was just a given that i write that for her. i was on a deadline - pretty sure i made the doc on september 4th, aka nine days before i posted - and i hadn’t had my full outline done when i started which is is... let’s just say very uncommon. 

this is another example of me going off outline and changing the story as i went because initially the estimation was about 12k and the basic plot was that after they’d fuck for the first time, they’d immediately talk about the past and resolve those misunderstandings. but when i got to that point, i realized it felt too rushed for how the story was progressing so i extended it a bit and added some more *tension* and *miscommunication* until they finally got their shit together!

also i feel like some would find louis’ blatant lies when interrogated about his feelings for harry to be unrealistic but as someone who has definitely done the exact same thing (lmao - without the happy ending), i find it a definite possibility. and i mean, we all say stuff we don’t mean under pressure - whether it’s to louis’ (and my) extent or not. 

another thing i remember about this fic was having to work out with sarah - who was also posting a fic for this friend’s birthday - posting times and dates. we eventually agreed that she’d post first and i’d post the day after (neither were the actual day of the birthday because we were both running late!) this is a conversation we proceeded to have many other times since we both have made habits of birthday fics and we pretty much have the same friends. 

all of this was also happening in sync with us writing a fic together for our other friend’s birthday which was on the 8th... yes it was exactly as chaotic and stressful as you’re thinking but also fun! and i love all three fics involved!! haha. 

just a flicker in the dark ~

okay this fic is definitely my favorite thing i’ve ever written and i’ve said that before many, many times but it’s true! but it too changed so much from the initial idea to the final end product. 

in fact, the original idea was a 20k somewhat-crack fic where harry was a ghost and louis was the paranormal investigator trying to get him to stop haunting this house. it was just supposed to be a quick and fun halloween fic to work on while finishing up my first blff and finally making head way on my abandoned second blff... obviously, that changed drastically. 

it initially started with me getting the idea of louis and harry being partners and enemies. and then i was thinking... why not throw exes on top of it while we’re there??? that was completely self-indulgent since exes to lovers is my favorite trope of all time. but the idea was still that they were paranormal investigators trying to work a case on a haunted house and though the estimated wc had raised to 35k, i was still hoping that it’d be quick and easy because i had two other projects that needed a lot of my attention. 

then came the first day of october. i woke up after having the craziest dream about louis and harry and the ghost that was not really a ghost. i ended up writing about 7k that thursday and the story really just took shape from there. the first sequence i wrote was actually the scene where louis goes into the backyard and ends up in the pocket dimension where the spirit imprints on him - i think it was a 3.5k scene and it just flew out of me sjksjsk. after that i took a small break to start my outline but it was more of a messy list of ideas and details and things i wanted to include than my usual organized format. the next scene i wrote that day was the scene where louis is in the bedroom and the demon is there but harry is not but then he is (i’m so good at describing things, right?) that’s actually one of my favorite scenes i’ve ever written and the funny thing is that i barely even knew all the details of the demon plot by this point but my hands just kept typing and my brain had the tendrils of the story forming and that amazing feeling that this is something good. 

i could ramble on forever about the process of writing this fic but i’ll just say that it’s the most fun i’ve ever had writing anything ever. word-building and supernatural elements are my favorite and getting to delve into those things here was so much fun! the entire process took twenty-five days (spanning from october 1st to october 28th - with a small three day break to focus on finishing miss wedding au!!) and though i did have some small struggles and moments of writer’s block, for the most part the story just came to me. and it’s so amazing to me because i didn’t even have all the details and facets of the plot until louis did too but it ended up working out??? if anything, it showed his process of figuring things out really well because it was the process of me figuring things out!

also this was the first time i heavily featured a fic pet in a fic and i fell as much in love with venus as everyone else did :’) she has my heart, truly <3 i love this world and these characters so so much and i hope to return to it sometime in the future!

sweet like honey ~

whooo, okay, this fic... yikes. this fic was a capital s Struggle. 

so basically this fic was written for the blff and though it came out first, it was the second prompt i signed up for, prompt 63: Friends to lovers AU where Harry and Louis are best friends and flatmates in Uni and they both need money, Harry for his gym membership and Louis for cute stuff like sanrio plushies, so they decide to film homemade porn videos together. Louis is shy and sweet and maybe inexperienced and Harry kinda doms him.

i remember the exact moment i saw the blff post on tumblr about it being allowed to sign up for another prompt from that point on - i was sitting at the counter at my friend’s ranch’s kitchen eating crepes and browsing on my phone. i saw the post and immediately signed up for this prompt because it had been my second choice and though i love love loved my first prompt so much, i was disappointed at not being able to write this one... but i did!

the idea and basic outline was actually completed way back in july/august but for some reason i just couldn’t make any actual progress on it for so long??? i’m pretty sure the document was stuck at 5k for over three months shsjksks to be fair, i did keep pushing it to the side in favor of other newer fics but i was just experiencing the biggest barrier when it came to this story and characters. 

in fact, i actually reached out to the mods in late october about a potential extension - they informed me that all writers could use a two week extension if needed and i figured that would be fine. however, i didn’t end up using it! within the first few days of november, i managed to pull the wc up to 8k by the skin of my teeth (was still majorly struggling) - i was still sure i’d need an extension but then something really awful but in this case, helpful, happened... 

election week. 

basically, i’m a big stress-writer. writing is what i do when i’m upset or anxious or stressed because it truly is my happy place. i wouldn’t say writing during that week made me feel much better about everything going on but it provided a distraction. so much though that i went from 8k to 24k in the span of a few days... and i have absolutely no recollection of writing any of it. 

not only did i not need any extension, i also somehow ended up finishing early by a few days. and i really liked what i had!! or what i remembered of it anyway shjskks.

one thing i remember really focusing on in terms of these characters and dynamic was having it actually just be them starting as friends and developing feelings later. i feel like a common trope in friends to lovers fics is having one or both of them with pre-existing feelings that they feel is unrequited. obviously there’s nothing wrong with that (i’ve written it myself lol) and it’s a common trope for a reason - because it’s good - but i wanted to try something a little different. them actually filming these videos is what acted as the catalyst to them beginning to view their relationship with new eyes and open the door to the eventual feelings that developed. 

i also had so much fun writing harry’s pov in this one haha. i feel like this version of him was really bold and shameless and super easy for me to develop. 

this is also the closest i’ve ever gotten to meeting my estimation word count... ever. my estimate was 32k and it ended up at 33k!!! and yes i’m more proud of that than i should be lol

-

anyways, i pretty much just rambled but if anyone sees this and gets some good insight out of it, then yay! feel free to send more director’s cut inquiries!! i love doing them (even if it takes me weeks - sorry again!)

[sebseyesandbuckysthighs]

Three Soldiers and a Baby | Part Fourteen

summary: Three handsome bachelors find their day to day operations disrupted when an unexpected new roommate (who comes complete with a diaper and a pacifier) shows up at their doorstep. How will they deal with this new and baffling responsibility without losing their minds or killing each other in the process?

pairings: Bucky x Reader featuring Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson

warnings: none

a/n: Here it is, darlings! My beloved little series has finally come to an end! There’s still the epilogue, which I will post this Thursday because ain’t nobody wanna wait a week for the conclusion amirite?! Thank you all so much for reading along and leaving me some love and feedback on the series. You have no idea how much I appreciate each and every one of your comments, they always make my day. Love y’all!

*warning to mobile users, the “keep reading” tab may not work so apologies in advance*

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 |

| previously |

After talking to Tony and practically ripping Nick Fury a new one, the three men were in a car and speeding off to the airport. Tony said he would do what he could, but stopping a commercial airline from taking off wasn’t exactly something that could be done without raising alarm amongst the passengers. Bucky was sure that he was ready to shoot the former S.H.I.E.L.D. Director between the eyes for spying on his relationship with you, and worse, for practically scaring you to death and taking away his baby. When Fury mentioned national security and just trying to protect the Avengers or some other bullshit, not even Steve was willing to listen anymore. He assured them that the girl was always perfectly safe and it was just her paranoia that had caused her to make up all this drama. Bucky punched the computer monitor and effectively cut off the video call.

Now they were on a race against time, trying desperately to catch up to you before this whole misunderstanding went any further. They raced through the terminals, practically flying through the crowds of people who were diving out of the way of what they assumed to be Avengers business. They knew where they were headed, but they just couldn’t make it there in time. It was too late. When they reached the right gate they were just in time to see it taxiing down the runway and off into the air. Dejected and broken hearted, the adrenaline slowly died down as they all stood there motionless. Watching you fly away and out of their lives.

It was late in the evening by the time they got back. On the ride home, it was Sam who tried his best to keep their spirits up. “Hey man, look at it this way. We know where they’re going and what the situation was all about now. We could get them back!”

Steve saw the reason in Sam’s words and tried his best to share the enthusiasm, but he was still feeling pretty beaten down. Losing Ellie was one thing, but seeing the way it was tearing apart his best friend was just making it so much harder.

Bucky could hear the words and thought that maybe some of them made sense, but nothing could lift the darkness he felt consuming him as they entered the elevator up to their apartment. He figured he had failed to protect you, to make you feel safe. Maybe it would be right to leave you alone as much as it hurt him to admit so. He decided he would give you some time, but still let you know that the situation had been handled. Perhaps then you would see reason on your own and come back to him. For now, he just wanted to crawl into bed and not get up until the pain in his chest wasn't knife sharp.

As the elevator doors opened, the three men walked out with their heads hanging, but raised them the second they saw who was standing by their front door. You and Ellie were sitting on the floor, waiting for them to come home. Standing up slowly, you shifted Ellie from one hip to the other while she gripped onto her favorite Bucky Bear and slept peacefully in your arms. 

“I don’t know what I was thinking.” You had been crying, but now you were determined to show them how wrong you had been. “I couldn’t make the same mistake again. Taking her away from you, from all of you, I would have regretted it for the rest of my life. With everything happening and so much changing over the past year I’ve felt like I’ve been losing my mind and I just panicked.” You were babbling on at this point and Bucky had heard every word, but all he cared about in this moment was marching forward and wrapping you and your baby in his arms again. This time he really wasn’t going to let go.

“Okay Barnes, you can let her go now. It’s my turn!” Sam whined as Bucky swung Ellie up in his arms and laughed along with her. After Bucky let you go in that cab, you were sure you would never see him again once you got on that plane. Then you looked down at Ellie and saw the way she looked back at him, clutching her Bucky Bear almost as if she could pick up on something being wrong. She didn’t smile or laugh like she usually did and you knew it was because she missed her father. Even a baby as young as her, she was capable of feeling the sadness of being torn apart from her family. You would have never forgiven yourself if you got on that plane, but by the time you realized all this you were already at the airport. If only you had known that while you were struggling to keep it together, trying to hail down another cab, the man you had walked away from again was already on his way to you. 

During that ride back to the apartment, Ellie began to fuss and cry, enough that the only thing you could think of to calm her down were the videos you played for her all the time. They were of you and Bucky while you were together. It tore you apart not to be with him, but you were gonna make damn sure that your baby would know who her father was. The videos were random and nonsensical, some were of Bucky serenading you, others were just of the two of you being together, laughing and talking. So throughout your pregnancy and those early months with Ellie, you would play them for her hoping that one day she would be able to recognize her daddy’s voice in the real world. You knew you would always regret that Bucky wasn’t there for her birth, that’s why you knew you couldn’t do this to him again. Whatever fears you had faced during the last few months were nothing compared to the feeling of tearing your daughter away from her father. You knew she would always be safe with him and that you could trust him to protect you. You just hoped it wasn't too late.

When you finally reached his apartment again, finding that there was no answer at the door, that didn’t stop you from taking a seat right there and waiting for him to return. You were determined to make this right and show the man you loved that you wanted to be with him. To be a family. It was once you were inside the apartment, and after each of them had had a turn holding Ellie, that they told you about Nick Fury's misguided plans. There was no sinister plot with faceless villains out to get you. Just a warning from a very paranoid man. You were furious.  A little spitfire like yourself, you were ready to find the man and make him sorry for ever putting you through all that hell.

“None of that shit matters now.” Bucky begrudgingly handed Ellie to Sam to hold and came over to you, giving you a turn of lifting you up in his arms. “You’re both here and I’m never letting you go again. I love you and Ellie so much. I want us to be a family.”

You had been laughing while he swung you around, but stopped as soon as he said those words. After so much time feeling emotionally ravaged, here stood Bucky Barnes revealing his feelings for you and your daughter. What else could you do, but admit your love for him as well. Of course, you’d fallen in love with the man back when you were together, but with him being an Avenger, you just didn’t know what could possibly come out of it. You knew he had a job to do and it was scary and risky. It had made sense at the time to you that you thought the future for your love would be bleak, but Bucky was ready to prove to you otherwise.

“I can retire.” Bucky said as if it was the easiest choice in the world. “The world has enough superheroes now. What’s one less?”

“Bucky, I can’t ask you to do that.” You tried reasoning with him. Even looking over to Steve and Sam, but they both just smiled.

“You’re not asking me, babe. I’m saying it.” Bucky cradled your face in his hands, pulling your lips to his and finally kissing you with all the passion he could find. You felt your knees give way and Bucky wrapped his arm behind your back to keep you from falling. He pulled you up, breaking away for air and resting his forehead against yours. Your heaving breaths mingled together and you finally felt that bliss you had once known come back into your heart. “The most important thing in my life is making sure that little girl is safe and taken care of. And you. I need you both in my life more than anything. Please. Please stay.”

You smiled as more irritating, yet happy, tears scrolled down your cheeks. Relishing in the feel of Bucky’s soft lips kissing the trails away. “Of course, we’ll stay.”

a/n: And there we have it! The last part! Hopefully you enjoyed it, loves. I really loved working on this series and I can’t wait for you to read the epilogue in just a couple of days! Again, thank you thank you thank you so so much for reading along. I have a little something something planned for the future so stay tuned. 😉

Feedback is always appreciated, leave it here!

part thirteen << part fourteen >> epilogue (tbp Sept 5th)

Series Masterlist

Full Masterlist

tags:

@avengerofyourheart | @aboveordinarymusicgal | @absolukeyrh | @abswritesfandoms | @ashlieadelia | @a-lonely-bic | @a-timeheist | @avengersbabe13 | @avengerskeeper | @buckys-other-punk | @captainamericasbeard | @captainwinterfalcon | @crazinessgraveyardsandcartoons | @curvybihufflepuff | @depressedpolishgirl | @desigirlworld | @divinediego | @dumblani | @fab-notfat | @feelmyroarrrr | @gigistorm | @hiken-no-stark | @hv-chw3 | @igotkatiepowers | @izzys-addiction-for-fiction | @jamesbarnesappreciationsociety | @jenlrose | @jesusbriskets | @kazuha159 | @kindnesswins | @kingcarterprince | @libbymouse | @lil-stark | @lbouvet | @mcuwillbethedeathofme | @meanerface | @mileysebschmidt | @miss2001babe | @mizzzpink | @mrsgoodnight | @princessselene04 | @princess-unicorn124 | @rachelle-on-the-run | @rainbowkisses31 | @redqueen1221 | @rraise-a-glass-to-freedom | @rumoured-whispers | @sassylittlesamoan | @scarlettsoldier | @sexyvixen7| @sgtbxckybxrnes | @socialheartbreak | @supernatural-fan-from-lithuania | @sunmoonandbucky | @tanelle83 | @thefridgeismybestie | @theunadulteratednerd | @the-villainsandheroes | @this-is-mycrisis | @unlikelygalaxygiver | @verymuchclosetedfangirl | @xxloki81xx | @ya-lyublu-tebya | @yallneedtrek | @yknott81 | @yourpotatotwiceremooved | @3dsaunt

[sagehaleyofficial]

HERE’S WHAT YOU MISSED THIS WEEK (9.18-9.24.19):

NEW MUSIC:

·         The All-American Rejects released a new music video for their song “Gen Why? (DGAF).” The song comes off of AAR’s latest EP Send Her to Heaven, which dropped earlier this summer.

·         Punk band The Menzingers released a new video for their new song “Strangers Forever,” marking the end of summer. The song comes from the band’s next album Hello Exile, out on October 4th.

·         Can’t Swim announced a new EP featuring the likes of Trash Talk’s Spencer Pollard, Taking Back Sunday’s Adam Lazzara, Frank Carter, Stray from the Path’s Drew Dijorio and more. The EP will be titled Foreign Language and is set to debut next month.

·         Fall Out Boy lead vocalist, Patrick Stump, was featured on the new single “86 Missed Calls” by Japanese band MAN WITH A MISSION. The FOB vocalist previously helped write and produce the band’s 2017 track “Dead End in Tokyo.”

·         Canadian singer Lights recruited Blink-182 drummer, Travis Barker, to collaborate on a new track titled “Long Live.” The song is an ode to the singer’s debut album, which was released a decade ago.

·         Mayday Parade surprised fans with a 7” EP as a continuation of their latest album, Sunnyland, which dropped last year. The EP includes an acoustic version of “It’s Hard to Be Religious When Certain People Are Never Incinerated by Bolts of Lightning” and a B-side titled “Turn My Back.”

·         Australian singer Alex Lahey recorded a cover of My Chemical Romance’s “Welcome to the Black Parade” for the radio station Triple J’s recurring Like a Version segment. The cover later received praise from the band’s frontman, Gerard Way, himself.

·         Bayside announced a new album titled Interrobang, as well as a video for the album’s title track, last Friday. The full-length arrives after the band dropped the song “Prayers” following the release of an acoustic version of “Mona Lisa” back in January.

·         Jimmy Eat World revealed the title of their next album, Surviving, as well as its first single “All the Way (Stay)”. Additionally, they announced a handful of tour dates in the U.S. and UK.

TOUR ANNOUNCEMENTS:

·         Tonight Alive are scheduled to play their first show since 2018 at Australia’s Unify Gathering Festival on Saturday, January 11th, 2020. The band previously announced a string of U.S. tour dates for early 2019 before cancelling the tour and taking a hiatus from touring.

·         Thrice announced a string of 15th anniversary tour dates in celebration of their fourth studio album, Vheissu. They will be joined by fellow rock acts mewithoutYou, Drug Church and Holy Fawn.

·         Green Day, YUNGBLUD, Korn, System of a Down, the Offspring, Of Mice & Men, August Burns Red many others were announced to play next year’s Rock Am Ring and Rock Im Park festivals, both in Germany. The festival will take place on the first weekend of June.

·         The Hella Mega Tour received major flack over the price and perks of its VIP packages. Some fans are not happy with the high price of a VIP ticket that doesn’t include a meet and greet with the bands.

·         Blink-182 frontman Mark Hoppus addressed the band’s cancelled gigs in Columbus, Ohio, and El Paso, Texas, on Instagram. The band was forced to cancel their El Paso date after a nearby mass shooting the day prior, where Hoppus revealed they were locked down in their hotel.

·         Simple Plan and Bowling for Soup announced a joint UK tour scheduled for the start of 2020. The Together Again! You’re Welcome Tour will feature Not Ur Girlfrenz as an opening act, and will mark the first time the bands have played together in the UK again in 16 years.

·         In light of the Cars frontman Ric Ocasek’s passing earlier last week, the Killers covered “My Best Friend’s Girl” at a show in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. Prior to this, the band’s singer Brandon Flowers posted a heartfelt tribute to the late musician on Twitter.

·         Blink-182 played an intimate Spotify Encores gig in New York last Thursday, where they performed their most-streamed songs. The show took place at punk venue Saint Vitus in Brooklyn.

·         Green Day took a stab at current U.S. president Donald Trump during their set at the iHeartRadio Music Festival. They changed the lyrics to their hit song “American Idiot,” swapping “I’m not a part of a redneck agenda” for “I’m not a part of a MAGA agenda.”

·         Waterparks announced the supporting acts for the U.S. leg of their Fandom Tour, as well as some extra UK and European tour dates. Openers for their American tour include rapper Yung Pinch and rock band Kitten.

·         Carousel Kings were revealed as the opening act for the upcoming co-headlining tour of McCafferty and guardin. Other bands joining them on the tour include thebreathingbackwards.

·         For the rapper’s 37th birthday, Blink-182 gifted Lil Wayne a joint of marijuana onstage during their New York show last Friday. “I’ll take this now,” Wayne said right before he sparked it up with the help of Travis Barker and an off-stage hand.

OTHER NEWS:

·         Angels and Airwaves and former Blink-182 frontman, Tom DeLonge, filed for divorce from his wife Jennifer after 18 years of marriage. After meeting in high school and raising two children, the couple is reportedly separating due to “irreconcilable differences.”

·         Following this, DeLonge posted three videos through his organization, To the Stars Academy of Arts and Sciences, that potentially show UFOs. In response, the U.S. Navy confirmed the videos as “unidentified” phenomena in time for Storm Area 51 last Friday.

·         In response to fan rumors, DeLonge also made a statement about his time with Blink-182 and squashed rumors that there is any bad blood between him and his former bandmates. To backtrack, Mark Hoppus recently spoke about Blink-182 before Matt Skiba replaced him following his departure in 2015.

·         Former MCR frontman, Gerard Way, announced that he was already working on the fourth volume of his hit comic, The Umbrella Academy. The third volume, which was recently released in stores, is titled The Umbrella Academy Volume 3: Hotel Oblivion.

·         Panic! at the Disco earned its third platinum single from their sixth studio album, Pray for the Wicked, for the song “Hey Look Ma, I Made It.” The track follows “Say Amen (Saturday Night)” going platinum in May and “High Hopes” going 3x platinum in June.

·         Good Dye Young, the hair dye brand of Paramore frontwoman, Hayley Williams, relaunched its long out-of-stock lightening kit. In addition to doubling its size, the company revamped the formula to be vegan and gluten-free.

·         Guitar manufacturer Fender announced a new nonprofit effort in collaboration with Panic! at the Disco’s Brendon Urie, Fall Out Boy’s Pete Wentz and more. The Fender Play Foundation moves forward with its mission to educate, equip and inspire young players.

___

Check in next Tuesday for more “Posi Talk with Sage Haley,” only at @sagehaleyofficial!

[stephiebutton]

So on Thursday before Coachella, my friend (who bows at the Altar of Ariana) sent me Ari’s posts on IG — one of the *NSYNC pay per view concert in which baby Ari was in the audience; and the new video of her lip syncing to Tearin’ Up My Heart. I thought maybe he was trying to convert me to an Arianator, but I honestly didn’t think much of it, nor did he, so I was just like ok, that’s cute!

On Friday, I had several people text me over a two hour timeframe when the rumors started spreading that *NSYNC may be playing Coachella—all while I was at work and couldn’t really wrap my head around it or even take the time to research it myself. At first I was like REALLY? Then I was like REALLY! By Friday evening, I knew something was going to go down, I just didn’t know what. I had convinced myself that they were going to perform, and that I had to be there, and I even researched flights and tickets; but then, I convinced myself that they were only going to introduce her, and I didn’t need to go. I was scheduled to close at work Sunday night, so I basically threw my hands in the air and was like “Oh well, I can’t go.”

Saturday rolled around, and I had a nagging feeling that I needed to try harder to make it happen, because whatever was going down was something that I needed to see. I knew that if I didn’t try everything I could, I would regret it. I had to close at work Saturday night, which means I had to be there around 3pm and work until 11:30pm. The gal that was scheduled to open on Sunday was still there when I arrived, so as she was getting ready to leave, I said “I need a favor...” and for some reason, I hesitated in asking her, like I didn’t really know what to say or how to say it, like the answer could actually change my life, so I just looked at her with a weird sideways smile, then finally asked if she could switch with me, so I come back and open Sunday morning instead of closing. She said she had to check with her family and see if they had plans, and she would get back to me. Thirty minutes after she left, she texted and said it was all good, that we could switch! From that point on, everything just snowballed. I had the biggest obstacle out of my way, so now to make the rest happen...

I went back and fourth about a ticket to the event. At first, I was like, “I’ll figure it out when I get down there,” like I usually do for most concerts I attend. I checked Stub Hub first, and was willing to pay whatever I needed to, but the only problem with that was because Coachella uses wristbands, not tickets, all bands had to be picked up in person. I called them to see what the latest pick up time was, and if anyone could pick up for me, and all other options I could think to exhaust, but it ended up not working out since I wasn’t going to get down there until much later. At that point, I was like “YOLO, I’ll find someone selling one outside!” But then I realized how late I was going to get there, and was like, “dude, if I don’t have a ticket by time I get there, no one is going to be hawking them; so I’m screwed!”

Then finally, I turned to the one place that scares me the most, Craigslist! I went through the posts, most were wristbands for Weekend 2, but I found one for Weekend 1, advertised for the cheapest I had seen any advertised, anywhere! I replied via text immediately, really not thinking I’d get a reply since the event was well underway and the wristband had probably already been sold. To my surprise, within minutes, the postee replied. I asked if it was still available, and he (I didn’t know if it was a he, she or other at the time) replied that yes, it was, but someone was supposed to pick it up later. But he also said that so many people had flaked already, that he wasn’t counting on it. After confirming it was a Weekend 1 wristband, I told him that I wanted it, 100%, guaranteed! The only problem was that he had advertised it from San Francisco and I was across the Bay, and I wouldn’t be able to pick it up until after midnight. He then replied that he was actually in Oakland, which happened to be the city right next to me! I couldn’t believe it! Aaaaand, it was only $200, which happened to be the EXACT amount of money I had in my wallet, and usually I don’t carry any cash at all! I let the mid shift manager know that I had to step out to make a miracle happen!

I’m not going to lie, I was like, “what if it’s a serial killer?!” “What if it’s a ploy to rob me?!” “Am I going to die?!” So I shared the address with the other manager in case the cops needed to know where to find my body. Two associates hugged me in case they never saw me again, and I was on my way. I texted the other manager when I got to the pick up spot, but I didn’t see her reply immediately, so I didn’t reply right away. She was worried that the “Craigslist murderer” kidnapped me and had been the one to text her that I was there safely, even though he had probably already cut me into pieces, just to throw off suspicion. 😂😂 😂 (we may or may not have seen too many SVUs or CSIs). All in all, it took less than 10 minutes to get there, less than 5 minutes for the exchange, and less than 10 minutes back. The course of my life changed in less than a lunch break! Now the second hurdle had been cleared.

I texted a few friends a picture of the Coachella box and they were all in semi-disbelief/not really surprised/kinda amazed/planning my *NSYNC junkie intervention. But they knew, if anyone was going on this adventure, it was me!

I had posted on Facebook trying to get someone to ride down to So Cal with me, so that I wasn’t traveling alone (I would have anyways, but company is always appreciated on long journeys). I was trying to talk my friends and fellow fans into winging it and coming along, but no bites. Finally, at about 9pm, one of my cousins replied and said she, her husband, and their baby girl were considering going down to Disney to join some of their family, and if I was still looking for some road dogs, they were in.

Schedule, check; wristband, check; road dogs, check. Everything was coming together.

I was home from work at 11:30pm, picked a few outfits, packed, showered, and was in bed by 2am. I met with my mom at 6:30am to exchange cars since hers was a little bit more current with the maintenance, and then I was back at work at 7am to get the building open and operating. The morning is still a blur. My fellow manager arrived at 11am, and I was out the doors by 11:30. I met my cousin and family at noon, and we were on our way. We got an hour into the drive and then the gas light came on. I was so excited that I had freaking forgot to get gas before we left! Like it never even crossed my mind. I had one mission, and I forgot all the steps I still needed to take to get there 😂. Luckily we were still close to civilization, so filling up happened, then we proceeded on the adventure of a lifetime. I think we only stopped a couple times for gas and a baby break on that six hour journey to our first stop. Let me tell you, my baby cousin is a true hero! That 5 month old was so well behaved, didn’t need a whole lot, and was just a little trooper. My cousin-in-law did a lot of the driving on the way down and I am so grateful for that, because it had already been a long day leading up to the trip, and it was going to be an even longer night...

We arrived in Anaheim around 6:15pm. They got checked in their room, my cousin-in-law took the car to fill up, while I got ready and prepped for the last two hour stretch of the trip.

I was officially en route to Coachella by 6:45pm. I remember eating very little all day because I just couldn’t, and I remember snacking on an apple and some goldfish during those last two hours to Coachella. (This is irrelevant but I’m throwing in all the deets I can recall).

I had never been anywhere near Coachella or Palm Springs, so I was really disoriented when I finally made it to that last highway before the getting to my destination. Traffic wasn’t horrible, but it was still quite a trek, so I was slowly getting anxiety with each passing minute. I followed directions directly to the fairgrounds, however, it was about 8:45pm at that point, and the streets were blocked a mile in every direction. I circled the area looking for anywhere to park, feeling helpless, I finally pulled over to ask someone what to do, and they informed me that parking had JUST shut down (at this point it was about 9pm). They suggested that I park at a shopping center and Uber in. I found a shopping center 3 miles away and requested an Uber. I was throwing things in my fanny pack trying to get it together because my Uber was on its way. The guy was only able to get me a mile and a half closer because of the street blockages, so I sped walked a mile and a half in, and started the winding path through the gates of Coachella.

I knew Ariana was scheduled to play at 10:30pm, and at this point it was probably 9:30pm, I was close enough, and I knew I would make it. I was no longer worried about making it in, but now I was having major anxiety and freaking out, and semi-crying at what might be happening in the next hour. There was a lot of talking to myself on that walk, the main message to myself was “BITCH BE COOL!” I knew it wouldn’t be a long line, since it was so late and the night was almost over. People were actually leaving as I was walking in and I’m thinking to myself, “don’t you people understand that *NSYNC is about to be on that stage?! Y’all are going to regret leaving early! I wonder how you are going to feel knowing you missed this when everyone would be talking about this in the morning!” But ya know what, not my problem. Their loss!

The walk into the festival felt just as long as the walk to the fairgrounds. It felt like miles of a fenced off path, which was made of dirt, but not just any dirt. The chunks of dirt were so huge, it was like walking on rocks. I was certain I was about to sprain my ankle, but I reminded myself that it would be worth it and the hospital would be there when it was over.

I made it through the gated path, nothing sprained, just a little sweat. I made it through security, and I was IN. I had absolutely no idea where I was going. I threw this trip together so last minute that I had no time to prep. I walked over to a tent covered stage. It was a big stage and I was like is this it?! I was looking for some sign labeling the stage or some list of set times, and found nothing. I asked around, the first two security people I asked were no help! One was so rude, he was like, “I don’t know, did you look at your map!” I’m thinking “mother f-er, don’t you think if I had a map I would know where the F I’m going, why would I waste my precious breath speaking to you?! I was like “dude, I JUST got here and there is no map and I need to know where the main stage is.” So his rude ass referred me to someone else who was nicer, but said that he didn’t know where the main stage was. I’m thinking “are you people kidding me?! How are you working the most popular festival known to mankind and you can’t tell me where the main stage is?!” A little panic started to set in. It was dark, it was getting late, her set was rapidly approaching, and I had no idea where I was going. So finally, I was referred to another guy, who actually pointed me in the right direction. He’s like “its all the way on the other side, past that tent, past the beer garden and you’ll see it.” The act that was on the stage I had first seen upon entrance had just started, and some people were running towards me to get to it, so I was going against traffic, but my destination was clear now. Once I had the stage in my sight, I stopped for a water. The girl selling those very reasonably priced water bottles (only 2 bucks! That was practically free in festival land) was like “I like your shirt” (an *NSYNC crop tee simply styled with *NSYNC across the chest. [PS I DON’T wear crop tops, but I figured, cuando en Coachella right?!]). And I simply asked, “this is the place right?” And she just enthusiastically nodded Yes. It was about to go down. I tried to locate a restroom, because I mean, I had just spent 2+ hours driving and chugging an energy drink and water, making no stops, but there were no restrooms in sight, and I was not about to walk back to the entrance where they were. I had done way too much just to get within eye shot of that stage, I figured, what’s a little pee in my pants?! It was probably gonna happen upon seeing *NSYNC for the first time in 17 years anyways! (PSS I didn’t actually pee my pants. I think my whole body had shut down at the point because nothing more was going to get in my way).

I kinda of walked back and fourth across the field, I walked all the way down the right side. I had one friend there already, but trying to get in contact with anyone in that mass of people was impossible. It was hard to tell where a good spot would be, because a lot of people were sitting down, so getting an accurate read was not happening. I knew just being there was all I needed, regardless of what I could or couldn’t see, but I really did want to see SOMETHING. My brain was all over the place, I was like “I could just start pushing through people. I could go all the way up front but all the way to the side,” the options were limitless. I ultimately didn’t want to cause any drama by pushing through people, I didn’t want a harsh angle of the stage, so I figured if I was semi central I would at least catch a glimpse of whatever was going down, no matter how far back I was standing. I couldn’t actually get centered because the sound and lighting booth was to my left and the people were too packed in to get through any further, not to mention there was a fenced off area in the middle for VIPs. (In fact, that’s where Billie Eilish and Justin Bieber were meeting. I remember seeing the crowd directly around that spot all holding up their lights and phones. I heard rumblings that it was Bieber, but I could not possibly care less, I’m not a fan [again, another irrelevant point, but it’s part of my memory, so whatevs!]) I settled on my spot and reminded myself that being there was enough. I’ve also done enough GA shows to know that when the show starts, people push in and up, so that was going to be my game plan.

By this time, it was probably about 10pm, and I only had thirty minutes to go! I was calm and quiet, because the ONLY thing I wanted in life might actually be happening, and I was there, I was a part of it. Ariana might have been a few minutes behind schedule, and I had no clue when the song I was waiting for would be coming, so I stayed calm and waited for it. It was the fourth song in, and when I heard the first cords to “Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored” I immediately started crying, and my camera went up in the air. If *NSYNC was actually going to be there, this was the song. This was my entire trip, the whole saga, coming to its peak, my dreams potentially coming true, 17 years of waiting. This was it!

I honestly couldn’t see much, and I didn’t even see them walk on the stage. This was either going to be the greatest moment of my life, or the biggest disappointment I’ve ever experienced. When the song came to a pause, and she looked over her shoulder, and then uttered the words I’d waited so long to hear again, I lost my whole ass mind. “Ladies and Gentlemen, *NSYNC!” I basically blacked out at that moment, and I only remember bits and pieces. I know I still couldn’t see, but what glimpse I did catch, I really only saw JC at first and I was like “is it just him?” And for a tenth of a second, I was thoroughly confused, but still getting my life and losing my ever loving mind! My eyes darted around, and I finally caught a glimpse of everyone else. (I also still didn’t know if Justin was there or not, because I knew it was physically possible that he be there, albeit, highly unlikely. Honestly, I’ll always love Justin, even though I can’t stand him much of the time, and I did secretly hope he would have made it to this, but I was perfectly fine with the fact that he ultimately wasn’t there). I didn’t know what my camera was recording, and I didn’t care, because this moment was everything. When the song ended, I stopped recording, because that was it...or so I thought. I had never even imagined that there would be more and I was so content with them just singing “It Makes Me Ill.” I didn’t have any time to process because immediately after that ended, “Tearin Up My Heart” started and my blackout went even darker. I managed to get my phone recording again, I still couldn’t see a thing, but it didn’t matter. What I do remember was the people right in front of me, looking back at me, and staring. I still have no idea why, because it could have been my screaming, it’s possible it was my singing, it might have been me sobbing, I may have even bumped them while jumping around. I was not aware of anything I was physically doing. I do remember Ari in the middle hitting that choreography so hard, and when Joey yelled “Let me see you jump!” I think that’s when I snapped back in to reality and I started processing things again. I went even harder with the dancing, singing and jumping, because it was one of those moments when I found myself actively living in the moment, and I wanted to live it the best I could. I’ve probably never smiled that huge in my life. As the song wound down, I stayed recording just in case more was coming (not that I needed anything else, because my life was complete in that moment), so I have them thanking the crowd and Ariana and that was a perfect way to wrap up that video.

Once they cleared the stage, I had to catch my breath, gather myself, and keep

from crumbling to the floor. I remember leaning over with my hands on my knees, trying to get my vision and hearing back. Attempting to process anything that had just happened. I had had a brief exchange with the guy next to me before Ari hit the stage and I was like “I’m here for *NSYNC” and I showed him my shirt. While I was trying to compose myself, he put his hands on my shoulders and was just like “OH MY GOD!” I think that was the general consensus of the crowd, because it was that epic. I stayed for her whole set, and appreciated everything she brought to the stage, but nothing would top *NSYNC. It was one of those show stopping, jaw dropping moments that could never be duplicated.

Because cell service had been so bad during the show, I just put my phone on airplane mode, as to not drain the battery, and I honestly, didn’t give a crap about the outside world. Not a lot of people knew I was going, and I didn’t want to jinx anything, so I kept the details of the trip very quiet, with the exception of a few friends I had texted or messaged directly. So once all was sang and done, I turned airplane off, only to be blasted with texts from friends who knew I was there, checking to see if I was still alive. Because I hadn’t replied immediately, a few of them thought I was dead in the dirt in the desert 😂😂😂😂.

The crowd was clearing out, and I was trying to coordinate a meet up with a friend of mine who scored a wristband earlier that same day. She was the only person I knew there, and I’m so glad I had someone to squeeze after the greatest moment of my life! We went to good ol’ Denny’s to hang out and further bask in the glory of the evening! We had mutual friends, and were pals on social media, but never had the chance to hang out together, so it was great to catch up and squeal about what we witnessed!

Finally, around 2am, I headed out of Indio, and I was on my way home. Yes, this trip was a down and back adventure. I knew it would be brutal, but I knew that it would be worth it. I drove about 3 hours up, and stopped to nap in the car, for what was supposed to be a 30 minute cat nap, but turned into a couple hours 😂. I was on a time crunch because I was due to be back at work at 11am. I got back on the road at 5am and the journey continued. I had exhausted so much energy at the show, that the last five hours of the drive home were harsh! I had to stop several times to stretch and keep my blood flowing, and at one point I knew I wasn’t going to make it to work on time, so I let my manager know. She knew I had gone, and knew I was insane, and was shocked I was still driving home, so she was cool with me coming in an hour or so late 🙏🏻. I made it home to shower and change, then made it to work for another nine hours. Although I was exhausted, I had the comfort of knowing that I had just experienced one of my top two moments in life (the other being the Star Ceremony) and the smile never left my face.

The entire adventure officially lasted less than 48 hours. I’m still amazed that everything went down the way that it did. I’m a strong believer in “if it’s meant to be, it will be.” And this was just another example of that being true for me, and especially when it comes to *NSYNC. I have experienced so many cool things and have countless memories thanks to those guys, and this moment will go down as one of the greatest!

[wasalwaysagreatpickle]

Friday 29 May 1829

6 35/60

11

Tho I had done the copy of a note to Miss Hobart last night not satisfied with it made considerable alterations all which and writing the note and dressing took me till ten and ten minutes 

Breakfast at 10 10/60 and at that hour sent off George with note to ‘Miss Hobart’ 2pp. 1/2 sheet note ‘Dear Miss Hobart if there be no letter for me, and you have one, do tell me your news – ‘you had a fine day yesterday for Vesailles, and I hope it sent away the gruffness in your throat – when I mentioned Friday (today) for the jardin du roi, it did not, at the moment, occur to me, it was a public day – the 3 private days are Monday Thursday and Saturday M. Desfontaines, who is the present director général is always engaged on Monday, but will accompany us at any hour on any Thursday or Saturday through the serres which, being under his immediate superintendence, he is the very person to shew – as for the galerie d’histoire naturelle, the hours are from 11 to 3, but supposing us to be there before 3, it would be kept open for us till 4 – M. Cuvier’s department is the comparative anatomy – I know he has no time to spare but on Sundays, and, even then, his shewing the lions of the gallery would be a favour; and sunday is the worst of public days – M. Desfontaines will take care to have someone ready to shew us everything that is most interesting; and in this case, we shall not want M. de Noé – abridgement which is a capital book of the kind, turning to Mozerai when you wish to be more largely informed upon any particular subject? But except the reign of Charlemagne, and perhaps, that of his father Pepin, Lord Mansfield would have said, you need not trouble yourself to go beyond Henault till you come to the reign of Louis II, in 1461. Have you read Sully’s memoirs? there is a nice little work on universal history by Zoph, published here some time ago, that you might like – very truly yours AL – 

It seems from your note, Lady Stuart de R- Rothesay will go – if she would like to have Cuvier in the museum, he will, of course, do anything he can for madame l’ambassadrice’ – George brought a kind little note from Miss Hobart in answer to the above and a letter 1/2 sheet from Miss Maclean dated ‘Richmond hill May 24’ from her friends the ‘Skinners’ ‘ I have not time nor strength at present to say much to assure your affectionate heart that I am better daily – since I came here - you will have been in despair at the idea of my having taken possession of Mr Long’s bedroom ‘the Crosbies did not go – this deranged all, and she went to the Skinners’ – much too weak to go to Hampshire now – will go the moment she gains strength ‘have sent for jessy as I can do nothing for myself and am going to take a lodging at the top of Hampstead – for fresh air – I am now eating plentifully, my cough and expectoration better’ –

She received my letter by the post, but not the one I sent the day before by the ambassador’s bag – Miss Hobart writes ‘you will see how it is. Sibbella writes to me rather a favourable account of her progress though I see she has thought herself dying, poor darling – I trust she may yet be spared to us’ – thanks for the trouble I have taken about the history of France and the jardin du roi – old Lady Stuart to sail from London on Sunday and expected here on Thursday so will put off going to the jardin till she can go with them ‘I am sorry she cannot have a letter from me, for I would insist on her insisting on Sibbella going to the Lodge, I am sure she would be comfortable there and at much less expense but I must wait now till I see aunt Stuart …… 

Ever yours in fact a friendly note I think she likes me. I cannot quite make out the depth of her feeling for Miss Maclean, she does not write or seem as if it would break her heart if anything happened to Miss Maclean. Somehow I think Miss Hobart rather flippant but perhaps she likes me I was saying on Monday ‘oh I did not mean that’ she answered you looked as if you did and you never look without meaning something. She took my arm a little on Monday she always declined it before and I made her lean as heavily as she could yet still if I could have her she would not suit me could not introduce me? has not money enough – 

Letter 3pp. and part of one end from M- [Mariana] (Lawton) dated May 11, 15 and 22 – very good accounts of Mr Charles Lawton. It seems Lord Crewe was buried on Friday the 8th instant his left £25000 to each of his grand daughters and £7000 a year to his grandson, Hungerford Crewe, on attaining the age of 24 – the income in the mean while to pay off a mortgage – nothing left to the son general Crewe but the person who lent him money being a defaulter to government, government takes possession of Crewe hall etc. the plate furniture and linen left as it stands for the use of the occupant of the house which may perhaps secure a good tenant – Mr Kennersley married Tuesday 19th instant to a niece of lady Warburtons – the sisters of Mr Kinnersley to remain with them – shall Mariana call or not? optional – Do as the wilbrahams have done? – 

Took George and off in a fiacre at 11 1/4 – got to the jardin du roi in 1/2 hour – the lecture began exactly at 12 and lasted exactly an hour – chiefly insisted upon the difference between mammifères and birds consisting in the difference of their circulation of blood – vide Règne animal (Paris 1817) volume 1 page 288 and 291 the systems being different according to the different media to be breathed air or water – should have been home in an hour, but turned along the rue de Suresne etc. looking for apartments and did not get home till 4 – no. 23 bis rue de suresne at 1600 per annum a nice little 2nde but without coach house and stable – the furnished apartment recommended by Mrs Barlow, 22 rue d’aguesseau, could not see again at the moment a small carrelé apartment au 2nde 45 rue d’anjou might suit such a person as Mrs McK- the salon looking onto a pretty little garden – might be 3 bedrooms, and might be very snug – b[u]t a premier 24 steps high rue neuve des Mathurins 41 looking int[o] a handsome court with good air and the Madeleine church at a little distance at the back, coach house and stable 3 bedrooms and a room for [?] and kitchen on the same floor at 2200 francs a year including all expenses of taxes porter and eclairage paid by the proprietor (and might get it perhaps for less, for 2000/.) seemed the very thing to suit us – but the house new (they said 6 years old) and little doors – had seen several other apartments not worth notice – 

Mrs Barlow came soon after I got home and stayed a couple of hours, till after 6 at which hour dinner came to my room at 8 – wrote out journal of yesterday all but 1/2 hours writing done after 10 p.m. on coming to my room – coffee at 9 1/4 – Note from Madame de Rosny – ‘je pars ma chère dame dimanche à 8 heures pour le château de mon beau frère il me sera impossible d’aller vous voir je serai dans les horreurs des arrangemens vous la journée toute à vous [Cesse] De Rosny Vendredi soir’ – very fine day –