#(and yes a big part of it is that my current job is awesome and i didn't know if i'd get this kind of opportunity again)

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

sorry for diary posting so much on main but this is the last one today prommy

[popculturebuffet]

More than Meets the Eye Retrospective: Dark Cybertron Part 1

Hello all you happy autobots and welcome back to my long look at Transformers More Than Meets The Eye. When we last left I looked at the sister comic, Robots in Disguise.

But a necessary one for Today's review: Dark Cybertron, a crossover between both books.

Dark Cybertron is the cumilation of a plot that had been slowly building in the background of Robots in Disguise while Bumblebee dithered, Prowl tried to install a dictatorship long before he got a bug in his brain telling him to keep going with that, and Starscream was awesome. Shockwave has been up to SOMETHING over the issues, working with his mentor Jhiaxus.

Chasing Jhiaxus in the best part of RiD was Optimus Prime, redubbing himself Orion Pax out of disgust with the legacy of the primes, alongside his friends Hardhead, Wheelie and Garnak, who soon found themselves chasing Jhiaxus. Mr J eventually lured them to a dead planet, where he and Waspinator, yes the boy himself, ignited a titan and made tracks for cybertron while leaving our heroes to their deaths as Shockwave held back Soundwave and his decepticons , igniting his final plan.

It's here that mystery plan comes to fruition as the lost lighters split up gang to help save the unvierse, while Bumblebee and his Cavlcade of Fuckups, and also Arcee try to stop the apocalypse and Starscream gets a new paint job as he tries to hold on for dear life to his throne with a big ole event.

This crossover's notable for a few reasons: it's the first proper event comic for the transfomers: While there had been previous event style arcs with All Hail Megatron and Chaos and crossovers with the IDW wide Infestation and the marvel crossover Transformers/New Avengers, which also means the new avengers and likely all of marvel exisit in this unvierse.

But this is the first crossover between books within the line, something that would become a tradition as IDW liked money and Hasbro liked free advertising for whatever they were doing in the toys at the time, either threading in designs from their current lines or in the case of combiner wars and titans return, just straight up having IDW model their events to match the toyline. . This lead to the ambitious and failed Hasbro Universe with Revolution, and the universe even ends on one with Unicron.

Ironically though.. this is the ONLY one to loop in more than meets the eye. And thank Primus for that. Look i'm not anti-event comic, sometimes an event can be a total banger. For a recent example see Marvel's Judgement Day. But the big two tend to do events and crossovers EVERY damn year, not giving books a chance to rest or status quos to breathe for a bit. So having More than Meets the Eye sit that shit out is a fucking relief.

It's also from a practical standpoint as this crossover shows both creative teams had trouble meshing the two together: the narrative splits into four plot threads, one in the dead universe with Optimus, Rodimus and CO, one with the rest of the lost light , one with the cavlcade of fuckups and one with god emperor starscream. the latter two evnetually intersect and the two casts DO interact towards the end of the crossover.. but in the six issues i'm covering today the only ones to interact with the lost lighters are Starscream in a brief video call and Optimus in one of the main plots. It's clear that while the two writers liked each other.. they may not of known entirely how to make the two casts function together, and thus kept them to their corners.

The result isn't a bad story but a fractured one. I will say upfront I won't be able to judge the story as a whole till next time, but I needed to do it in two parts as it's a big boy and there's a lot to go over. So join me under the cut as darkness falls over cybertron, titans rise, and rodimus gets a new toy so stupid it will bite him in the ass for the rest of the comic. IT's Dark Cybertron and it's under the cut.

We open with Nova Prime's crew. Nova Prime was a prime who was seen as a great one.. but in reality was an supremacist piece of scrap who wanted to conquer all other forms of life. He will not be missed. Among him are our boy Cyclonus and Jhiaxus, who tells Shockwave to FINISH MY WORK.

In the present.. Shockwave almost has, having seeded ores aroudn the galaxy and experimenting on a titan, both the same one that declared Starscream chosen one and then vanished.. and that Waspinator just brought home. It starts screaming in terror and bleeding out it's eyes

Elsewhere on Cybertron, Starscream woke up from a nap to find a few hours ago the sun rose.. and hasn't gone down. He also has a new all red everything paintjob, a familiar one

As i've been told and found out.. this is Starscream's look from Transformers Armada, which I did watch when it was coming out but entirely forgot this is what Starscream looked like because my memory is quicksand and only few things escape it like X-men trivia.

It's.. not my faviorite. It's almost ENTIRELY red and whlie it does look better in later shots, it's just not as fun to look at as his classic look and while he'll keep this look for the windblade mini series, i'ts telling the artists reverted to his old standby as soon as they could. The Armada look isn't bad and looking at stills from teh anime it loks GREAT there.. but it's a bit too one note for the page, at least these pages.

Starscream decides to call the autobots for help.. not the ones he exiled, an I told you so from prowl is death in it's purest form, no OUR autobots.

For now though we cut back to Optimus. Since we last left him he and his crew are trying to escape.. and luckily run into some old friends

I love this so much. Unsuprisingly Swerve made it his ring tone. Naturally Rodimus dove in anyway to save his old friend/boss/dad.

Rodimus shows his dad around, which really feels like a teenager accidently exposing his dad to all the stuff his dumbass friends do while trying to be respectible. The wind's taken out of his sails by Ultra Magnus who asks if Optimus is taking command with all the tact and grace he's known for.

Optimus isn't, he's only here for the guest spot , he's got his own leading roll to play in the other books, but he is happy to get the tour. .until Starscream calls. Screamer of course can't help but passively agressively brag about how he was elected in by popular demand after bumblbee fucked up hard

Then asks Cyclonus for help since he knows the dead universe better than anyone. The Dead Universe is a parasite, a universe that should fucntion right but is instead both sentient and EVILLLL. And it's hungies.

Back on Cybertron, Team Fuckup is starring in horror and the Dinobots want to punch the fuck out of the sun. Bumblbee tells them to wait for it... and granted he's telling them not to punch a bright light on the horizon, something even prowl can tell is stupid which tells you something, but honestly after the last two years worth of comics, the bar for Bumlebee's competence is low.

He ends up being right as the necrotitan lands. Meanwhile Shockwave goes into a whole rant about hwo this is all ineveitible that has a bunch of vauge images and two optimus primes about ot throw hands for some reason. none of this is relevant to the rest of the crossover, it's a clear misdirect and it sure does exist. The real point is who he's talking to: Nova Prime and Galvatron, who somehow returned. Also Galvatron and Megatron are two seperate people in this continuity, happens a lot, moving on.

Onto chapter 2 and Team Fuckup's strategy is now suns out guns out.. though Bumblebee's redemption arc continues as when the Autobots want to punch the giant, Bumlebee tells them no and tells them to either get in line or fuck righ toff, which actually gets them to listen. Seems Bee got a spine with his new form and I like it. After 20 some issues of him listening to whoever yelled the loudest while ignoring the people he's supposed to be serving, this is nice. It's clear field command fits him better.

He does have a bit of an exestial crisis wondering if this is the titan that choose starscream and I THINk it is. I'm not sure. But either way it's here and i'ts big.

Back with Team Rodimus, Brainstorm tells Optimus the dead unvierse is alive and that's why going into the dead universe is tricky: it'll kill anything it senses shouldn't be there. Luckily he has a plan.. and a weird creepy parsite in a jar. It's also so fun seeing the straightlaced optimus interact with the lost lighters. So dang good seeing Chromedome resisit the urge to condescend to Optimus.

Back with Starscream he's doing what any sensible cybertronian would do in this situation: GET HIS GUN. Or a lot of them hidden in a closet Rattrap is telling him to come out of. Please everyone knows Starscream as pansexual as fuck. Rattrap urges caution.. which is like saying it's tuesday but still when Starscream is whiffing it you know it's .. also tuesday but also probably an issue.

Back on the lost light we get a great scene as Rodimus, Magnus and Optimus hit swerves. Magnus is curious if they should be having command discussions in a bar but Rodimus for once isn't snippy, which tells us deep shit is a comin: he simply wants to be by his men.. granted he regrets that when he finds Swerve taking photos but for once Swerve is also not as flip: it's three of the greatest autobots of all time, on the preciipce of SOMETHING happening, something they call feel.. that shared feeling of dread. Something's coming and it ain't good.

The trio get a text from brainstorm: He's ready. This being brainstorm the most he has is a palm thing that keeps the dead universe from killing you using the venom of a monster from there he keeps in a jar. Granted this is only because it's short notice.

So our heroes come up with a plan: split up. Rodimus, Optimus, Hardhead and Cyclonus (Since he has experince) will go into the dead universe to plug whatever stygian hole is leaking. Wheelie and Garnak will stay by in Optimus' ship to pick them up after. Meanwhile the Lost LIght will head after Jhiaxus. Magnus is doubtful he can lead.. but Rodimus perks him up, assuring him he can do this: he may of been thorugh a lot.. but this is his comfort zone: "You're chasing a war criminal and i'm leaping into the unknown"

Back on cybertron Starscream talks with Scoops, a cybertronian ratrap framed for him and who belivies in screamer's prophecy. And as it turns out Screamer REALLY shoudl've payed attention to what that prophecy was or asked or.. anything other than accept it as face value as it turns out he's pegged as a "false leader" one who will bring on the coming darkness... "The stars shall scream and the symbol of the uncreator shall become clear" and said symbol is.. not encouraging to screamer or us

Anyways back to Shockwave: he's talking to Nova, and reveals the space bridge in the Necrotitan isn't working.. but luckily he has a backup plan: megatron.

We end the issue with two more cut tos: in the dead unvierse, Team Rodtimus fight some parasites hoping to snack on them since the signal their using reads "FOOD' to them and while they get away from them fine.. someone else notices. more on him soon. Back with Team Fuckup, the Calvary arrives: SOUNDWAVE BABY.

Part 3 begins with Starscream, whose assuring his adoring public.. only for a meteor to apparnetly land near the titan.

Speaking of shooting the Autobots wage a war to destroy the not so evil forces of Soundwave, only for the metor thing ot distract them too.

Before our next plot point let's talk about this series pacing as you might of noticed the last paragraph or two was just "this plot point, now this". And that's because the series likes to jump around, jump around, get up get up and get down. It has FOUR plots it's juggling and rarely do the issues just.. focus on one or two, especially early on. So each issue is bouncing around several subplots often for just two pages at a time. I don't mind a big story having to move around, but you have to let things settle for a minute. Let a plot point marinate a bit. I shouldn't feel rushed in a 12 issue crossover. 12 issues is a LOT for a story, again why this is a two parter. We do get some good character stuff like Bee growing a spine, a lot of it feels like a reahash. For instance did we need the starscrema going to get his gun scene? no we coudl've had rattrap suggest talking to scoops earlier. None of this is bad and some of the character stuff is necessary: Rodimus showing optimus around both moves the plot along with starscream's call and is objectively hilaroius. But a lot of it feels like thumb twiddling to get to the next plot point. We probably coudl've compacted most of team fuckups scenes into half an issue, if that. It feels like their cutting to each plot to make it seem important instead of carring how a story should progress. It feels like the writers took turns with scenes instead of truly colaberating on the crossover an das a result we just jump jump jump.

So we jump! Jump for the plot to our next point: the lost light where their being pushed off course... turns out Metroplex's thumb what got embedded in the ship after the annual is alive again.. and Getaway knows why: Tyrest, for all his madness, once said you can find a titan with a titan.. and figures Metroplex is trying to reunite with itself.

At the Necrotitan, Team Fuckup sadly gets back to buisness as usual.. arguing with each other. Fortuantely this time, Bumblebee.. is still a compitent leader. He's still on "wait for it" mode.. because they really CAN'T do anything and attacking a giant statue is a death warrant, and he's taken Team Soundwave's help as while they aren't on great terms, they have the same goal: Stop Shockwave. Prowl takes this with the grace, dignity and cool he's known for

God it's good to hear ANYONE, especially Bumblebee, tell Prowl to "shut up for once". And Bee's not wrong. While wait and hope things go well was a TERRIBLE strategy when Bee was running the planet and all it did was get starscream on the throne and all of them exiled, in this case.. their facing a giant cybertronian with weird glowing eyes who they can't really understand. As we'll learn shortly titans function SORT'VE like regular transformers, but are so giant, massive and ancient their hard to parse. A small band of semi-reformed fuckups, an asshole, and a bunch of casette tapes and their player/dad isn't REMOTELY enough to stop that thing and interacting with it might just piss it off.

And sure enough Starscream seemingly prooves that hypothesis as he tries to manipulate it by talking to it.. only for it to explode into 2 or 3 pages of purple light. And This.. I like> it lets the MAGNITUDE of this thing's power play out, it's sudden, and it's shocking, and the effects afterwords aren't good as Arcee is out, the death wave having taken down their forces. once again Prowl won't shut the fuck up, wanting them to attack... and bee brushes him off essentially asking

He points out the death wave, his words not mine, is heading towards the city and despite Starscream's efforts.. it goes off. Shooting the titan would've eithe rdone nothing or set this off SOONER. There is NOTHING they can do and that.. works for me. As douchey as Prowl's being which, par for the course and all that aside, you understand his want to do SOMETHIGN.. but their in a situation where all they can do is just sit, wait, and HOPE they can figure something out. Shockwave said it best as Starscream tried talking to the titan. "We were all too late from the beginning". Unlike the bulk of the comic thus far sitting and reacting is all they have. .because they don't know the full scope of what's going on here. WE as an audience don't know what the hell the necrotitan just did: I only have it's name thanks to the wiki.

The wave not only hurt the living.. but wakes the dead as Metalhawk is back, on the bad guy's side now.. and pisssssseeed. Starscream to his credit reacts more with "Oh goody another cherry on the shit sundae that is today." but he still gets stabbed and Metalhawk is taking Megatron, bye. While Scoops goes to help people, the citzens surround starscream, his star falling.

On the lost light thei rleft with a decision: follow Jhiaxus.. or follow the severed thumb. Ratchet dosen't wanna as he feels their back in the "autobots mainstream" again... but Brainstorm disagrees.. and Perciptor shockingly AGREES: an ancient god has asked them to come find him, and given the end of days is going on back at home, an ancient god could REALLY come in handy right now. Magnus agrees and they head to a planet full of blood red water. At least I hope it's water. THey go deep into planet danzig, and find a horde of microbots ready to tear them apart. These are the amonites from the 25th issue adn they aren't happy.

Closing out the issue Shockwave prepares to make Megatron into a spacebridge. It's very impressive and not at all healthy.

Chapter 4 begins back with the lost light and with good art for those portions again! Yeah while i've glossed over it because this is a LOT of comics to go over and i'm already behind, the art for the lost light sections of parts 2 and 3 is once again by James Raiz, who has a very sketcyhy lifeldian style.. and not bein ga fan of those styles in general, I like it even lest on the quippy, weird lost light. It dosen't fit at all and the lack of expresssion dosen't really work with characters who thrive on expression even when they got no mouths.

It also works as we get bits like Brainstorm trying to hop onto Perciptor's exposition and Magnus announcing himself as "duly apointed enforcer of the tyrest accord" before remembering "Oh yeah the horrifying events of the last arc right. Just an autobot now". I'ts a bit funny but also very sad. All it gets is the super combinining amonites blowing up their window.

Back on cybertron the mob turns on starscream, with Scoops rightfully calling him out for dooming them and pointing out the black mark on him as a sign.. whne really he just tried to schmooze an elder god of a robot, but semantics. poitn is time is running out for our faviorite boy.

Back on planet Danzig, Skids remembers the amonites and wonders why their pissed.. forgetting they you know, ended their forever war and one of them tried to kill thunderclash, something the lost light prevented. Take your pick.

With the Lost Light too big a target the crew decides to split up: they have a few water vechiles and half of the aquabots, so they should be fine, but they still need more... so Magnus gets an idea: they'll take the rodpod. Like the audience Getaway wonders "what the fuck is that" before we gaze on it in all ti's glory.. or as glorious as it is as for some reason we're suddenly back to raiz art.

Yes the rodpod, which Magnus was worried about as naturally Rodimus loves this stupid fucking thing as mucha s I do. But Skids is banking on Rodimus' short attention span.

The important thing here, besides this very hilariously stupid thing happened in a major crossover and that's awesome, is Getaway's reaction. His disguist, his sheer confusion.. for now it just comes off as most people's reaction to this ego piece who aren't used to Rodimus shit by now. But true to roberts.. this bit is one of the MAIN REASONS why we still had to cover this crossover. It's not the only one but this one small character moment.. ends up changing the entire course of this entire comic and our heroes lives forever. Yes the RODPOD is so rediculous and breaks a man's brain so bad, it has deep lasting conseqeunces that will last to the finale of this comic. I love that more than words.

Our heroes take the rodpod out for a spin, and while Rung kills a guy, and it's awesome, our heroes blow up a giant super combined amonite as they apparently have no upper limit but no upper limit dosen't mean "can't blow up real good"

Back to the dead Universe where Optimus deals with some squabbling from the kids

See this.. really shows the contrast between the two styles: the bickering over with Team Fuckup is annoying at times, bette rin this series but still annoying. The banter between the lost light on the other hand feels both more genuine and funnier. And I get the quippy style isn't for everyone: The MCU has gotten some fatigue fo rthat.. but I like a bit of back and forth. it shoudln't be the whole thing, and MTMTE succeeds largley because the characters are deeply made as well as deeply hilaroius, but a little humor helps. It breaks up the dark exesntial terror of everything to occasoinally have things like Rodimus' stupid headship he built for his own amusment or Optimus being about 5 mintues from turning this dead universe around so help me god.

Yet the questions he brings up .. arne't unfair as his next cuts deep: if Optimus had asked him to stay, would he have? And the answer.. is yes. Yet what cuts deeper.. is optimus response: He has the utmost faith in Rodimus and the progress he's made.. and it's clear form his silence he both regrets he's hardly made any and the choices he HAS made. He saved the world, something he rightfully rubbe din Hardhead's face as he was one of the many who nearly died thanks to Tyrest's attmepted genocide, but it's clear the thigns he's done weigh on rodimus: Would staying have helped? Could he have made a bette cybertron?

And the hard answer is.... no. Him staying wouldn't of been a good thing: he didn't want to be there, none of the bots who left really had ideas for a new better cybertron and MORE autobots wasn't going to fix a situation where autobots being there at all was causing tension with the nails. The sad truth is Bumblebee failed not because Rodimus left, but because he didn't have any plan other than "We want to retain power" , and with a throng of people crying for a better government and something NEW that was never going to happen.

The ironic thing is while Rodimus is on a quest for the old... his going out, exploring, doing daring due war or no war.. IS something new. He's letting his bots be who they are, having down time, movie nights, open bars. Sure he's also shoved some of them into very bad situations, the whole overlord mess was a waking nightmare and should never have happened and swerve shooting rung is ENTIRELY his fault. Rodimus, like Bee, often tries to lead like this is war time instead of a shaky peace. Yet despite also operating from that style.. he's casual enough and caring enough deep down that his bots.. get to have lives. Be who they want to be. He's not yelling tat them for daring to want to not shoot people or trying to create infastructure, he's just like "when I need you, do your fucking job bro". He may be embarassed around optimus.. but his letting his crew be people instead of weapons is better than Bee trying to lead like this is a war of attrition and not "what comes after" or Prowl acting like the war neve rended and a shiny new police state is better and not what caused the war in the first place.

OUr heroes soo seen Cyclonus is bleeding.. and soon have bigger issues as Nightbeat has arrived.

Back on cybertron Prowl sucks suprising no one wanting AGAIN to attack the giant robot that just wiped out hal fof them despite having no plan other than "shoot it REAL hard" Bee once again calls him out

He brused Prowl's ego enough to actually get him to pause.. well huff like a child but Prowl does have soundwave scan the city, which picks up something bad: Megatron SCREAMING as Shockwave both turn shim into a bridge and tries to get him to join. He naturallyr efuses ESPECAILLY since the primes are involved, so instead of joining in the new world order.. he gets prime coming out of his chest.

We end the issue on Team Magnus as they find Metroplex.. and end up in his eye socket.. which is hollowed out. Which is impressive but horrifying. And also not very healthy.

Onto part 5, and Shockwave is helping his pawns out of a screaming megatron's chest

When Team Fuckup arrives... Bumblebee has no idea what Shockwav'es doing but it end snow.

It dosen't though because Metalhawk is here, and Bumblbee's attempts to pull an "I know your in there somewhere fight", failed as Metalhawk is consumed by vengance and purple stuff. Skywarp attempts to just free megatron but his teleporting fails.

Prowl questions WHY Shockwave is helping nova.. not getting that maybe, just maybe the One Eyed Two Horned Grounded Purple Plotter whose already manuvered you all like chess pieces.. is using them as pawns for something much worse. Either way he gives Nova time to escape and his best buddy Waspinator time to bring him the staff Waspinator used to awaken the titan and summons it as if it were one of his x-men.. and has it crush them as if it were his juggernaught.

Back to the dead universe, let's talk about Nightbeat: Nightbeat is an autobot detective. During Nova Prime's previous plot, he had a thing installed in Nightbeat's head to turn the poor guy into his sleeper agent. Unfortunately for him he again picked a detective and one of the best at that so while he coudln't do much, Beat at least figured out he was being brainwashed and after shooting Hardhead had enough will to beg heardhead to shoot him.

So naturally his sudden return is a lot for everyone to process. As for how the shore he died on WAS connected to the dead unvierse, Optimus correctly guesses he got swept in with the tide. We get a sense of Nightbeat's personality too, as doing a simple look at Cyclonus tells him about Tailgate's near injury: he has facial scars, they were self inflicted, and they were patched recently. Cyclonus responds to this invasion of privacy mixed with genuine sympathy by trying to choke a bitch.

Back with team fuckup they TRY to count up their wounded.. but they hav ebigger issues: Megatron is craddling Ironhide crisis on infinite earth's style, before Galvatron rips him the fuck in half, starting his streak at one and declaring WHOS NEXT.. and somehow that's not their biggest issue as the titan is still active and shockwave is now in control.

Back in the dead universe, we find out how Nightbeat survivied: he was dead going through the portal and sense dead equals alive in this universe, he's spared. Sorta like how a healing spell usually hurts a zombie in an rpg just reversed.

At any rate he has some bad news for cyclonus: his hand generator thingy broke nad the Dead Universe has reclaimed him.. and he also has time to ominously say "your all home now" before triggering a giant force field around them. Turns out his death didn't undo his sleeper agent brain thing and Nova has come for them.

Before we move on to our final chapter for this batch, let's look at this cover. Which I rarely do for tim's sake but this one well

It looks like Nova Prime is playing with his dolls again.

At any rate we're back with what's left of Team Fuckup: bumblbee' smissing while what's left is running from the titan. The Dinobots plan to lead it away.. but it was already going this way they just were running away from it and are only pulling a prometheus because their genuinely not fast enough to get out the side, especially with some of them carrying wounded.

Back with Team Magnus, they notice Metroplex is decaying... partly due to age as getting spare parts is hard for titans and partly due to the weird blood water all around Planet Danzig. Theya lso find that Metro's BRAIN is missing: he's still alive but without that he's clearly dying. Getaway notices something in the water and calls Swerve for help but h'es a bit busy getting his groove on

They do however find a place to drydock. Back in the dead universe, Hardhead tells his friend he's going to rekill him while Optimus fakes a fight with rodimus to tell him there's a hidden barrier. While Hardhead tries to reach him Nova arrives.

Back on cybertron Starscream's no good horrible very bad day continues as he finds not only is his mark of shame spreading, but he's not the only one dying. After getting yelled at by his second tankor today he finds the titan heading right for him and the wounded

Back on Planet Danzig, our heroes find some arrows in the dry dock.. but it takes them around in circles.. then an Amonite blows up the ship, leaving them stranded.

We end this issue and the first half of dark cybertron with Nova Prime megomanically gloating... Hardhead escapes to shut him up.. only for it not to go well> Turns out PRime is not only crazy strong, but he CRUSHES Hardheads fist in his hands and then watches the poor guy desintgrate. He has plans for those left though: he's taking them to see a new friend he's made: bumlbee whose the shiny new space bridge.

So that's where we end it? Can Team Fuckup somehow save cybertron? Did any of team magnus survivie? Can Optimus shut this dude the fuck up. Find out in april folks! Thanks for reading

[cordria]

Need some help

I've found myself in a little pickle, and I need some thoughts from people who are not involved. If you'd like to read and answer the ending poll, please read more. Poll at the end.

Necessary backstory part 1: When I first met my brother in law (BIL), my husband referred to him as an 'asshole'. BIL was raised in a family with very 1950's thoughts of how women are supposed to be, drank all that kool-aide, and got a huge dose of 'I get everything I ask for' on top of it.

In the years I've known BIL, I've found my husband's initial description to be apt. Always needs the best stuff, saves no money at all, bounces between jobs, gets everything he wants but never seems to be happy. Took up drinking about ten years ago and never looked back. Haven't had a sober interaction with him in years.

Necessary backstory part 2: Every year, my in-laws do a big family reunion at the end of December. Plan it a year in advance. Put down a deposit on a large party room. This year, in early-ish December, BIL texts and says he got the greatest tickets ever to go to Mexico - super cheap flight and resort stay. Only the plane leaves the day before the big family get-together... so can we move it?? Everyone reorganize their schedules instead of him just not come?

And... yes. Apparently my mother in law bent over backwards to move this family reunion for him. Everybody lost our non-refundable deposits. Had to do the reunion at my mother in law's tiny little house. Had to listen to my husband complain for a week about the whole thing.

Necessary backstory part 3: BIL was married and had two kids (currently 18 and 21), then divorced and found this new girlfriend and had two more kids (4 and 6) with her. When he got these tickets, he had framed it as a 'family vacation' and said 'the kids were going to have a blast'. Apparently when he said 'family' he meant him, his girlfriend, and his two newer kids. Not his older kids, who had thought they'd be invited as well, only to find out they don't apparently count as family anymore.

So we're walking into this reunion with feels, right? And lots of people are walking into this reunion with FEELS. Tense would be a good word for it. Ready to punch BIL into oblivion if he says the wrong thing would be another way to describe it.

SO. Story time.

Holiday gifts are being exchanged. We get BIL and family a gift card for a dinner out, and get nothing in return (as usual). Towards the end, BIL pulls out his wallet and grabs a bunch of money. Calls his two older kids over and hands them each a hundred dollars. That's it. That's their entire holiday present. Then he calls over (most) of the rest of his nieces and nephews and hands them each fifty dollars. My son gets skipped.

Normally, I'd call him out on it, because he's drunk and probably forgot my son (who was quietly playing with his new Lego set in the corner) even existed. But the atmosphere was tense and I was definitely on the side of just let it go. It'd take more than $50 to stick my hand in that hornet's nest.

Nobody really noticed. My daughter did, even offered to split hers with him, but I shook that idea off and just gave her a hug for being awesome. Repeat the phrase I've said plenty: gifts are given, not demanded to be received. BIL is under no obligation to give everyone a gift - even if he's an asshole for skipping just one kid, it's his choice.

Party goes without too much of a hitch, but everyone is definitely happier when BIL leaves early to go to a different party. (although the amount of bitching about how we had to move the whole thing and he left early?? was just insane to listen to)

Afterward the party is over and we head home, daughter goes shopping with part of her money (donated some to the food shelf near our house, saved the rest) and gets some doll thing she's been wanting. Son picks out a dinosaur that roars when you squeeze it. (They ended up with a significant sum of money from several relatives.)

We go home, write thank you cards. (yes, I'm old fashioned. If you get money or a gift in the mail, you send a thank you card.) Daughter writes out her cards (she had five to send), son does his four (same four, then not one to BIL). Thank you cards are getting too expensive to send for not getting a gift. Mail them off, think nothing of it, move on.

About a week later, I get a text from mother in law asking when my son's thank you card to BIL would arrive. I reply back that he's not getting one. If one does not give a gift, one does not get a thank-you card.

CUE DRAMA. OMG levels of drama. BIL was too drunk to remember what happened, and thinks he gave my son some money, and refuses to be talked out of it. Thinks that if he really missed someone, he would've been told at the time. He's dug himself a deeeeeep hole and nobody's going to be able to get him out of it.

Current situation, which is now almost six weeks of this insanity: My daughter's birthday is coming up, and BIL is threatening not to come and bring a gift if we don't send him a thank you card from my son. My instinct was to respond 'you were not invited; I don't want your drunk ass in my house ever again', but thought better of that before I clicked 'send'.

MIL is on BIL's side, thinks I should just send the thank you card and keep the peace, that it's just a silly little card and it doesn't mean anything. Husband is on my side, thinking BIL is throwing a man-child sized fit my three-year-old is old enough to know not to do.

Nobody's arguing that I'm in the wrong here, btw (other than BIL). I'm not the asshole in this situation. Nobody thinks I am.

HOWEVER. Sometimes you can stand on the moral high-ground of one battlefield and watch the war fall apart around you. Makes you wonder what's the bigger goal? I'm not 'fixing' my BIL with this. I'm not making a dent in the toxic hell-hole of a FOX-riddled black hole he calls a brain.

So now I have to make a choice - a bigger choice than just the stupid $2 thank you card. And here's where I need your thoughts.

Option 1: send the stupid thank you card. I'll likely hear about this later when he tries to lord his 'win' over me, but it'll stop the family rift. My children will not have to be in the middle of an almost-50-year-old throwing a tantrum any two-year-old would watch in amazement. Even though I and my husband would be willing (and happy) to never see BIL again, it's harder to unilaterally cut that tie from my children's lives. They deserve to get to know their family, and understand their family - the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Option 2: send an essentially blank thank you card. He'll get his card, but I am not sinking down to actually thanking him for anything. 50/50 on whether this would solve anything or make it worse, though. Would simply depend on his mental state when he gets it.

Option 3: hold onto my moral high ground, disinvite him from a party he wasn't invited to anyways, and wait for the chaos or for BIL to forget about it. This could possibly be the stake that drives BIL away (not sad at that thought). My worry is that where BIL goes, my children's nana will go as well. And the ultimate worry would be that we (me, my husband, and our kids) stop getting invited to family functions, since MIL coordinates most of them and she has zero backbone when it comes to BIL. It's a not-unreal possibility that this could cut a good portion of my husband's family out of my children's lives for some time (and most of the rest are wonderful people). And even if the worst was not to happen, this'll be a constant source of stress and strain on everyone.

So I'm... not sure really what to do. My family thinks I should hold my ground because morals are more important than having a relationship with a drunk asshole - and that there are more relatives to fill the hole. (all true) My in laws think I should just send the card because I'm not 'winning' anything here and I should look at the bigger picture. (also true) One even offered to purchase, fill out, and mail the damned thing for me.

I just... I dunno. This is just stupid. So, so, very, very stupid. Stupid enough it makes me want to cut BIL out of my life just because I don't want the anxiety surrounding this any more.

I'm trapped in a stupid, bizarre situation and I'm to the point where the thoughts of random internet people I do not know apparently mean something to me.

tl/dr: My asshole of a brother in law forgot to give one of my kids a gift, and is now causing major family drama by demanding a thank you card.

[nuklearis-sutotok]

Answering all of these because @anonymous-badger-238 did.

Here’s some questions to ask:

If you could change your height, would you? And be able to reach something? That would be awesome.

What’s something that happened years ago that you’re still mad about? I made a very ignorant mistake and outside forces did not give me the chance to rectify it.

What was your favourite musician/band when you were ten? My brain does not process time this way... I don't know. I have long had an affinity for The Highwaymen. Willie has always been my favourite and the first artist I recall hearing.

Do you like sparkling water? Most of it tastes burnt to me. Some brands I have tried are tolerable. Maybe I am trying the wrong ones.

What’s the last album you listened to? I tend to listen more to individual songs or playlists... Dad has a High Kings album in the car atm, so I suppose that one.

Do you wear flip flops? I wear sandals indoors, but no, flip flops hurt.

What time do you usually wake up in the morning? This varies greatly and can range from not sleeping, the crack of dawn, 6, or 8ish.

If you could choose one language to instantly be fluent in, which one would you pick? I am currently working on it, but, Hungarian.

How long have you had your tumblr blog? Not this one specifically, but I joined in 2013.

What was your dream job as a child and is it anything like your current job? I was torn between music teacher, librarian, physics teacher, and comic artist... Currently I am looking to go back to become the third, I have been the second and done some of the first, have a degree of sorts in the last.

Did you usually have a cafeteria lunch or a packed lunch in school? I was home schooled for the most part, but usually packed a lunch whe. Sometimes I had cafeteria food... If it was food. This was in the 90's, nothing was certain.

Do you pop your pimples? Because of a tissue disorder my skin is unusually clear, but I tear at it. That is not as messed up as it sounds I swear.

If you could choose one celebrity/public figure to erase from history, who would it be? I assume this could have a potential nasty domino effect. You may erase some bad things, sure, but how much good do you erase as well? It is not, thankfully, for me to decide in any capacity.

How old were you when you first used youtube? Idk... When did youtube come out? I was there for that. So 10, I guess.

What was your first ever anime? That is hard to remember as well, it could have been Pokemon, DBZ, or Sailor Moon.

Were you more into disney channel, nickelodeon, cartoon network, or pbs kids as a child? Cartoon network and pbs. Mostly cartoon network.

If you could redo one year of high school, would you? And if so, which one? I didn't go to high school. I got a GED and went to college, so I guess none of them. There would be no point.

If you could make one fictional character real, who would it be? Myself. I'm kidding. I have no idea.

What video game have you put the most time into? Heck, that one is hard to decide... Could be something from the Final Fantasy series, could be one of the Suikoden games, could be a handful of others.

Do you like doing jigsaw puzzles? Yes but pattern recognition makes me feel like I am somehow cheating.

What’s your favourite dog breed? Wolves, huskies, big fluffy borfs but I like them all.

Do you prefer scented or unscented lotion? I like scented, but am picky about the scent. I like forest scents, amber, musky scents, cherry.

Were/are you a theater kid? If so, what’s your favourite play or musical? I was a media services professional, so yes, a lead stagehand. Probably the 1940's Radio Hour.

Do you collect anything unusual? Define "unusual." I collect books, sheet music, knives, wolves, foxes, Manhattan Project related things, art supplies, rocks, and whatever interests me... I suppose none of that is too unusual.

What’s your ideal weather and/or temperature? 68 degrees if we're just sort of there... But I like rain, storms, fall, and winter.

Would you rather take three five year olds or one fifteen year old in a fight? ... Why are we fighting children?

How long did you live at your last address? I have no idea, I have moved many times.

What’s your favourite sandwich? Ice cream ones.

Have you ever had surgery? Dental.

What’s your least favourite pokemon? Idk, I would have to think for awhile on that.

Do you have any accessories that you wear every day? What counts as accessories? No. I have some I wear often... A watch, a forint on a necklace...

Do you have plushies on your bed? Yes, a handful of them. A couple of stuffed goats, a couple of stuffed hedgehogs, a dinosaur, and a couple of foxes.

What’s your favourite lady gaga song? I don't know if I have a favourite but I do like her.

Do you prefer to make your own playlists or listen to ones that others have made? Depends. Typically I make my own but sometimes I listen to others.

Were/are you ever able to find souvenirs with your name on them? I think I found one once, but I don't remember what it was and I was shocked to find it. I believe it was at a store on the local reservation.

Do you own a bike? If so, how often do you ride it? I used to, not now, no. I used to love riding. I don't know if I still could or not.

Do you prefer iced coffee or iced tea? Allergic to tea... Probably like coffee a little too much.

What’s your favourite big cat species? All of them. Floofs.

When was/is your golden birthday? I was 4.

Have you ever run a stoplight while driving? If so, was it an accident or on purpose? I don't drive.

What family member, immediate or otherwise, do you get along with the best? Living or...? Living, one of my sisters, dead, my great uncle understood me fairly well. My grandparents.

How many times have you cried in the last week? I don't keep track.

Do you prefer barbie dolls or bratz dolls? Action figures.

How many shirts do you own in your favourite colour? One is close... My second favourite colour? Most of my closet is black.

Do you currently live in the state/province you were born in? Yes.

Would you rather have bird wings or bat wings? Bird.

Are you good at swimming? I sink like a rock. So many people have tried to teach me, I know how, I just can't. I don't even float. It's just straight down.

If you could pick one craft to instantly be good at, which one would it be? My first thought is blacksmithing, Idk. That is probably not what I would choose in reality but at the moment it sounds good.

Do you know how to play any trading card games (pokemon, yugioh, magic the gathering, etc)? Several, yes. Pokemon, Yugioh, Magic, DBZ, Digimon... I collected a lot of cards for awhile, I don't anymore. I wouldn't mind collecting again in the future.

How long was your shortest relationship? That is a difficult and complicated question to answer. Pass.

[mellowwhumps]

looks at you with my big blue eyes

Do your characters have any cool facts about their hair? Do they represent anything? Hair lore :3

big blue eyed blahaj guy is in my askbox LETS GOOOOOO HELLO LEM!!!! LOVE THIS ASK (check out his writing btw!! very awesome!! he’ll be doing an oc intro post soon as well so stay tuned)

YES!! yes all of them have hair lore it’s so fun i planning out hairstyles that are development-related…it’s so fun. scuffed question btw i know what you are (the correct answer is in my dms as the voice whispering in my ear to write)

also i stole your divider. mwahaha

————☆————

Haley - for the most part he keeps long hair because it’s natural…but because he’s so adamant on it being related to balance, not wanting any external factors to affect his perforrmance in battle, he doesn’t ever cut it. and this is meant to represent a lack of change! 

beyond a certain point he does start exploring other hairstyles even if he still doesn’t cut it, showing how he still is the same, mistakes can’t just be cut off like hair, but he shows an acceptance for growth and moving on!!

and of course i have to mention the braids!! because originally they are also a symbol of the past (with elowen, he braids them because they obscure his face when fighting + elowen is the one who taught him how) but they are also part of ria!! in the end, he is a mishmash of everyone he has ever loved

————☆————

Halcyon - her current hairstyle is extremely screwed up because if you actually imagine it untied one side is much much longer than the other!! and this also does have a part in her story too

because she’s been living on the streets for so long (old oc…generic backstory is a must but she’s so precious to me), her hair just got really really unkempt. split ends, everything, semi-long, and obviously that doesn’t give a good impression. so!! cerilux (her commander/senior) tells her to cut it! and, yknow, typically she would have obliged because she was a heavy people-pleaser…but halfway through she disagrees

and this does show the competence of cerilux for giving her a choice, since this is very important in halcyon’s character development!! since cerilux would have wanted her to have short hair like most of the other male recruits, since that’s the norm. but she wants to make that difference. 

the half that has long hair is sympathy for the others like her, the half that has short hair is the one that wants to protect, the one that, no matter how conformative, is still an act of change.

and of course her hair color! which is a very unnatural kingfisher-feather shape of blue (the bird she was themed off of). but actually the kingfisher’s feathers aren’t blue, but brown! no matter how much she’s idolized as a hero, perhaps, this is still her. she is no queen, unlike the one she serves. she’s just doing her job. but still she’s special, and so many other things that makes others admire her just as it is. in the end, nobody cares.

————☆————

Twelve - in querencia, their hair was LONG. like to the floor long. once again it is so messy. nobody cared about them, at least. but verrill doesn’t care. verrill spends half a day trying to maintain it since he knows they still don’t want to cut it even if they don’t say it. braids it, even, combs fingers through the hair of someone nobody else would touch. he cares so much about them even if that act was dooming them both…ouh

stuff goes down. verrill’s gone. and they still had that braid, really, never did want to fully take it out. they can’t remember why, the phantom of some caring touch in their memory. because no matter how much their memories fault and fade, other things sometimes don’t. by all means, they can’t let go, even if it is a hindrance. 

eventually, it is cut, though!! they don’t want to be burdened by it anymore. it shows their longing for something more, something better, something real.

never mentioned this to anyone before (very old concept), but in querencia, long hair is seen as weak! since it covers skin and makes them look less vulnerable, less free. hair is a confine, and though they do want short hair, they never could ask for it. they were weak before, but now they know how not to be while still being weak. on earth it isn’t the same and will never be the same, because dystopias and utopias aren’t earth.

maybe that’s why they liked emmei in the first place, because emmei gives them a place to be weak and they do the same in return. in the end, they’re both trying to live their own lives.

————☆————

Verrill - once again, long hair in his hometown was seen as weak! and of course he doesn’t want to be that way, so it’s kept mostly short. oh, but that isn’t the case. 

the front part of his hair is still long, still obscuring. he wears a scarf/cape to hide the parts of his neck that aren’t covered. he is not meant to escape. he is not strong enough to escape, despite him having so much compassion in him. he’s shackled.

it’s still hope. he hopes that one day people just will stop caring. one day something will happen, things will change. nothing happens. that’s what drove him to release twelve from their cage.

hope never changed anything for him. because of his act, he causes the downfall of an entire city. nonetheless, his hope does indirectly affect the one person he wants to save semi-positively. selfish, but it’s enough for him. in the end, he’s not a saint or a hero, just verrill. the warmth of the sun in winter, no matter how much it burns.

————☆————

Ria - not much here, actually! but the colors of her hair are dual-toned since she’s essentially a mix of the two kingdoms focused on in the main story!! a symbol of harmony, if you will. blue for hampton, the kingdom by the sea, and brown for irecel, the landlocked kingdom!!

silly fun fact she does the braid for herself because she learnt from watching haley!! while she does learn from him she won’t ever explicitly ask him to help her either, and that’s something that will be worked on :))

she has clips pinning her hair to the side as well because just like haley, she’s cautious on instinct and any threat can and will trigger a fight-or-flight response, so she doesn’t want hair to obstruct at least one of her eyes. but it’s not full coverage, because in the end, she’s still a child and still messes up.

————☆————

Elowen - honestly since his hair is the exact same for the first arc of the au with 🫵lem i have and it’s similar plot i’ll just. use the au LMAO (yes i know you’ve heard this before lem. do i care no i’ll say it again.)

so yes! his braid was originally at the back because that is a remnant of his past! his hair isn’t naturally too curly he just kinda. does it. and straight hair is easier to braid anyways!! but because it resembles a ponytail like naeri’s he just couldn’t wear it like that anymore when he left to form the syndicate.

but he does still keep the braid. because just like haley (or rather haley is just like him) he can’t fully let go of that past. in the original universe he died with the braid at the back because there is no change, he’s as stationary and closed-off as ever, but in this au i do allow him to!! 

and i was thinking that when the timeline ends he goes back to the braid at the back. because no, it’s not that he doesn’t want to change, it’s more of honoring the dead and learning to move on with the past, facing it headfirst and breaking through. in the end, the past does shape the future. which is also why i nicknamed the au ‘futures past’!! once again subject to change but fun fact of the day

————☆————

Ida - woah new ocs i swear i’ll do an intro post soon…anyways!! hard to describe it but yeah it’s undercut hair and yes is it really mello if i don’t try to relate it to identity

because!! he served in the military and the right side of his hair, which is cut, is meant to symbolise his time there! the part of him that he doesn’t know how to deal with, something that he can’t part with because it’s what changed him the most. and the left side of his hair which is left long is meant to symbolise his present! 

my honest thought process was i make this guy look as mascfem as possible because yes he is trans and no i do not know how to write dysphoria whump so this is the second best thing. have fun lem.

and yes! he does have a dark-purple streak in his hair. while he wants to rebel and be different from the others, it is still the purple of auxili’s (the laboratory he works for) logo. just like his entire outfit honestly…in the end, he is forever in control by them!!! he simply cannot escape! and that’s also some sort of screwed up metaphor for his identity as well. and also he’s a foreigner so that’s also symbolism. go get him yuuto 💥

————☆————

Ibys - another new character! ida’s fault this time for their hairstyle!! they refused to let him get close at first, but then one time ida was bored and he just. kind of started doing it. it’s not even out of care or anything, because he will always view ibys as a tool (he has to), but he braids their hair. (and they’re touch starved…)

after that, they just kind of assume that’s what he wants it to be like, so every day they turn up with that exact same hairstyle. ida obviously doesn’t notice because it isn’t really his job to care, as long as they can do their job he doesn’t mind. so that’s just how it is. after everything ends i like to think ida has a good laugh about it

however, as it is, their hairstyle wasn’t very good for seeing. so? solution? headband! since ida doesn’t really want to chop off their hair knowing they’d agree anyway. so now the headband’s just part of their attire.

it’s really symbolic in a sense since it shows their dedication towards him…since the hairstyle is extremely complicated, a mishmash of braids and random accessories, yet they do it every day. ida’s influence on them is extremely large since their last handler wasn’t exactly too kind, and yknow. 

parting hair to braid is just such an extremely intimate thing and for it to be done without any sort of emotion towards it on one side, while sparking the first semblance of freed emotion on the other…well. it’s complicated, but in the end still beneficial.

————☆————

and that’s it!! once again thank you for the ask lem…actually made me think about my characters more that’s crazy

[vulpine-spectacle]

Still on the previous chapter. I'm fascinated by your version of "baby would you love me if I was a worm?"

Eurydice: baby

feyd: yeah

Eurydice: would you love me if I were a worm?

feyd: yes

Eurydice: but what if I were a violent, bloodthirsty worm?

Feyd: I would love even more

Eurydice: okay 😊🥰

Noo noo the bene bitches want to secure another part of the lineage by seducing feyd!! 😱 rooting for Eurydice to tear up these crazy women and have sex on top of their bodies. Why not? 🤷‍♀️💅🏽

I'm loving how the story unfolds. Feyd taking the reins and keeping some secrets for himself it's awesome 🤌🏽 and Eurydice enjoying the moment of mourning for Nuala, I think our girl deserves it 🙏🏽

(still intrigued by feyd's dream about her and her son dying or in danger 👀 tf do you mean garll?)

Xoxo 😘😘😘

Eurydice poking Feyd awake at night with the big questions, let's be real.

Eurydice: I committed war crimes. Feyd: *actively figuring out how to get her pregnant again*

I am positively delighted by the assumptions throughout the comments that the intention is to seduce Feyd. ;) The Bene Gesserit certainly have a great deal at play. They've got their plans within plans rolling around. These plans concern Feyd...but there is another player. ;) ( also Feyd is currently doing mental gymnastics trying to figure out how to convince Eurydice that having sex on bodies is a great idea, actually, so good job. )

I am so glad you like Feyd keeping secrets of his own!! That was such a moment to write, and one that I feel very strongly about. Even though they've had their version of a confession and they have history together, Feyd still doesn't 100% trust her...and he's insecure ( though he'd never admit it ) over the idea of losing her. So he's doing what he can. >:) He's being a Harkonnen.

( ... ;) in the words of our lord and savior Neil Gaiman, wait and see. )

Much love to you, my lovely!! <333

[average-guy-reviews]

Mrs Harris Goes To Paris (2022)

"In 1950s London, a widowed cleaning lady falls madly in love with a couture Dior dress, deciding she must have one of her own. After working to raise the funds to pursue her dream, she embarks on an adventure to Paris that will change not only her own outlook -- but the very future of the House of Dior."

The very first thing I want to say is what a pure dose of delight this film is. It has been a very long time since I have watched a movie that has been such a "feel-good" romp from beginning to end. Yes, it has moments of pathos, and even sadness, but they do not take away from the overall feeling of happiness currently residing in my heart.

Historically this film is firmly on the nose. Everything about this film, from the timescale for Dior to the garbage strikes in Paris in 1957, from the fashions to the vehicles, seems to have been fully researched and recreated in great detail. The effort was utterly worth it as it made the film, and everything happening within its confines, seem completely genuine. This along with the cinematography, especially one night shot over the roofs of Paris, drew me in and made me feel like I was a part of the scenery. Magical.

Every performance was on a par with the best I've seen in a very long time, from Jason Isaacs, as Archie, and Lambert Wilson, as the Marquis, to Isabelle Huppert, as Claudine Colbert (the closest thing to a villain in the whole film). There are two stand out performances, from two young stars, as the will they/won't they love story subtext. Alba Baptista, as Natasha, and Lucas Bravo, as André Fauvel, were simply exquisite and their on screen chemistry was absolutely perfect. Bravo in particular was a performance I was very pleased to be able to see.

The absolute star of the movie though, in every single way, is Lesley Manville. As the eponymous Mrs Harris she sparkles on film in every scene. Whether she is cleaning someone's house, or getting fitted in Dior, she is flawless in the role. As a woman who finds out for certain her husband has died in the war, some 13 years after the event, she brings a level of sorrow to the screen that had tears in my eyes right near the beginning of the film. And then she decides to go on an adventure to Paris to buy a Dior gown, massive undertaking for a character who is, in her own words, an 'invisible woman'.

Her marvel at the sights she sees in Paris, despite walking past huge piles of rubbish, underlie the massive differences between her everday ragtag life, and the magic she feels in the bourgeois magnificence that is the French Capital. Manville's performance is outstanding, and at no point did I ever believe she wasn't Mrs Harris. That kind of depth and ability in a performance is the mark of master of her craft.

The director, Anthony Fabian, has done an incredible job with this film. He has given us a story of pure joy, inhabited by fully fleshed out characters that we can relate to and a tale about following your dreams, however big they may be. As for the soundtrack? It has Johnny B. Goode by Chuck Berry on it, ergo it is automatically awesome.

Overall this film is a magnificent piece of art. I was legitimately punching the air in happiness by the end of it. In all the time I've been doing these reviews properly I have only give one film top marks, and that was Elvis. Mrs Harris joins those lofty heights with a perfectly well deserved 10/10, with a full recommendation to everyone to go and see it, as the French would say, vite, vite vite!!!

[murumokirby360]

My Redragon Hylas (H260) Gaming Headset Review (w/ my Paper Dolls) - Part 2 (Final) [Jan 18th, 2023]

Hi! Here's Part 2 (Final) of my Redragon Hylas (H260) gaming headset (featuring my paper dolls). 🎮🎧😊

And in this part, I'm testing out my new gaming headset using my PC & my smartphone (Honor 8C).🎧➡️📱🖥️

If you haven't seen my Part 1, then please [CLICK ME!].

So, without further ado, let's get started:

My recorded video 🎦📲: (Pls watch.)

• Here it is, time for some audio test, and let's start with my (Windows 10) PC. As I unstrap the nylon cable, I quickly show you this awesome-looking splitter, and tugging the nylon braided numerous times to show how strong this cable is before 💪 I uncap these protectors & plug these three onto my computer. 🙂🎧➡️🖥️

• Aside from the sound quality from two earmuffs, my headset lit up the RGB lights! How cool is that!? 😃💡🎧 Even better when I turn off the lights for a true coloring lit! However, I've noticed a big bleeding light because of their cheap thin plastic. Still, looks cool though. And what better pair than my current mechanical keyboard from the same brand as my headset! 😁🎧⌨️💡

26th to 30th Image(s): ↑

• And here are some pictures of what RGB light should look like. Unfortunately, I can't adjust nor customize my likings (namely my favorite color → 💙) with the RGB light, as it's already predetermined to subsidize the cost. Such a shame...😕

• Now, what about the sound quality? Well, according to the official manual, the Hylas (H260) uses a 50mm dynamic driver unit to improve sound quality while playing games. And no, it didn't include a surround audio feature, like other expensive gaming headsets. I've listened some music, videos from youtube & other audio softwares with my new gaming headset for 2 to 3 hours, I even compare it with my current ZNT headset to determine which is the better sound. And my thoughts about the Hylas were, fairly decent, but not great. 😕 When I listen to bass-related music, it went muffled sometimes. The same goes to vocals & voices from listening/watching Youtube videos, they're often ruining the quality. And the separation, the treble, and other important tones? Well, subpar... Nothing new on the audio table. And in terms of better sound between the Redragon Hylas & the ZNT Soundfit, surprisingly (or unsurprisingly), the ZNT Soundfit edges out over the Redragon Hylas. Yes, while the ZNT has unbalanced & lacks bass, it's surprisingly a bit better than the Redragon Hylas. I doubt it, I know... Gee, I can't find a better headphone to surpass my two current headphones/headsets...🙄

• Comfort, on the other hand, the Hylas fits right in my head! I haven't experienced cramps or squeezing during my music time or watching videos. However, it tends to slip when I shake my head, but at least it holds pretty well. And actually, this is what I prefer over my ZNT SoundFit's tight & claustrophobic fit. So, that's a plus for me. 👍

• The mic is pretty decent. While it's not anti-noise cancellation (like their earmuffs), it gets the job A-Okay (I guess). One thing that bothers me is their weak bending of the mic, I hated it. 👎 If only this thing can detach, too...

31st & 32nd Image(s): ↑

• [31st Image] On the bright side, we appreciate the RGB lights! Right, you two!? ☺️💡🎧 Let's give another try wearing my new headset! 😊

• [32nd Image] Okay, whoa! Whoa! 😮 These two need a private room! lol 😅

33rd & 34th Image(s): (Taken from my family's smartphone w/ another brand)↑

• And finally, I've tested out with my current smartphone using the included audio splitter cable onto my new headset. 🎧📲 Again, the Hylas' signature sound was the same as before, and I would prefer my current ZNT headphones. My paper dolls seem to be having fun though. 🙂

Overall & Asking price:

• Well, my lil' brother told me this is the best budget gaming headset... But, my mind said otherwise. Yes, it is indeed a good budget headset, but a lot of tweaks & replacements, including the sound driver, could improve better, let alone the cheap plastic material that they used. So overall, if don't want a break your wallet & going for the budget route of headphones, then the Redragon Hylas gaming headset could be your decent option. 👌🎧 But, for die-hard headphones, fans & headset enthusiasts, look elsewhere. 🖱️

• The Redragon Hylas costs from ₱795 ($14,60) to ₱850 ($15.61) from PixelPlay on Lazada PH [CLICK ME!] 🛒🌐🇵🇭, and its available in three different colors: Black, White (mine), and Pink.

Well, that's the end of my topic!

If you want to see my REAL top 5 rank “Year in Review” post & "My Yearend Techs & Misc. Items Summary - 2022", then please click these → [CLICK ME! #1], [CLICK ME! #2]. 😉

Tagged: @lordromulus90, @leapant

[blacktobackmesa]

"Gordon’s gut feeling was not liking the direction this was going in.

'So I took it,' Benrey continued. 'It was the story that made sense to Gordon Freeman, so it was probably the right one. If I could play the part of Final Boss, maybe I could have some story that made sense. And like, if I was secretly planning all this, that’s so much cooler than having to believe that everything about the way I work is–'

Benrey stopped himself, but seemed to realize it was already too late. He closed his mouth with a half-grumble, half-sigh.

'A mistake,' he finished. 'Being the awesome final boss was easier than accepting I don’t work.'

The metaphorical cards were all on the table. Gordon could never forget that boss fight, with the gigantic warping form of a security guard spouting line after line of a nonsense narrative in what Gordon had assumed was some attempt at scaring the team off. 

But that had never been true, had it? Benrey hadn’t been trying to get anyone to do anything. It had all been for him. He was throwing out narrative hook after narrative hook, trying to get anything to stick to the wall and establish that he was a part of the world. He’d tried every angle– appeal to emotion, nostalgia, crude humor, a grand adventure, even video game developer corporate conflict. It was all a Hail Mary toss, and it was never caught.

'Holy shit, dude.' Gordon could only whisper."

For the fanfic commentary, this was one of my favorite parts of "Don't Spell Memory Without Me" and I was genuinely blown away by how good and smart this interpretation of Benry is for the Gordon streamman series and I would love to hear your thoughts on it. <3

In response to this prompt

[cracks knuckles] FUCK yes let's go. Ramble time

So neat fact about this. I posted the first chapter of Memory in late May of 2022, and it took several more months to get to the Benrey reveal. I actually put this explanation of Benrey’s actions in a joke text post in mid April, and it got exactly twenty notes. Foreshadowing level 100. 

I have a close friend who I bounce all my ideas around with, which is a very necessary part of the creative process for me. It also makes it handy to keep track of when my ideas came around– my first discord message to them that discussed the concept of Benrey having no past and improvising everything is dated to February, and it was in the middle of a chat about the story that would evolve into Run For Your Life. So it’s been floating in Headcanon Space since before the Streamman series got a solid start. Dang, it’s been around since before I started my current job! 

Benrey’s just so interesting, you know? He’s weirdly powerful. He follows his own set of rules, and doesn’t like it when other people don’t. He’s not human. He says all sorts of stuff that doesn’t make sense, even when the stakes are at their highest. What’s his motivation? Why is any of this happening? There’s never a concrete answer, but from another perspective, it’s pretty simple. He’s in an improv scene.

I’m an ex-theater kid, and I’ve done my fair share of improv. I took a class a couple years ago held by this big-name local theater, getting back in touch with the basics. Most people are familiar with the classic “Yes, And” rule– you can’t turn down the fact that your scene partner just gave you. You have to accept that as reality, and then build on it. 

Gordon, of course, breaks the golden rule right off the bat. It wouldn’t be turning Benrey down if he just went “Oh I don’t have it, I meant to bring it today.” It’s the fact that he’s confused about being asked. As a character, Gordon (not Wayne) is a terrible improv partner, and the scene is supposed to be all about him. Benrey’s existence is defined by and contained within an improv scene, and this guy keeps turning down all his leads. So when Gordon gives him something to work with– a role as an antagonist– he has to take it. 

This interpretation of Benrey is also rooted in my own experience with neurodivergence, and with something I call the Spicy Banana effect. There’s a name for it, probably, but I like Spicy Banana. I’ve heard anecdotes about people who have gone decades without realizing they have a banana allergy since nobody had ever told them what bananas were supposed to taste like. And why would you? Everyone knows what bananas taste like, and since the affected person never got seriously ill, they just assumed that everyone tasted bananas as spicy. Among other things, I was well into my teenage years before I found out that it doesn’t take most people well over an hour to fall asleep every night. When you don’t have context, it’s easy to feel like everyone is just managing obvious problems better than you are. Finding out the truth is double sided: you have the relief of knowing you’re not bad, you’re just different, but you can also feel cheated. I’ve had to deal with carrying rocks in my backpack this whole time, and their backpacks were empty?

As a final note, I want to talk about a bit in this excerpt that I'm unsatisfied with, but refuse to change.

["]And like, if I was secretly planning all this, that’s so much cooler than having to believe that everything about the way I work is–"

Benrey stopped himself, but seemed to realize it was already too late. He closed his mouth with a half-grumble, half-sigh.

"A mistake," he finished. "Being the awesome final boss was easier than accepting I don’t work."

The final line in this part doesn't really feel like something Benrey would say. It's hard to articulate exactly, but it feels melodramatic in a very DeviantArt Sad Wolf Drawing kind of way. It's a little too honest for Benrey, like he's breaking character. But I can see how that could make it hit even harder for some, y'know? Like he's letting his guard down. It's not my favorite line, but I won't touch it. It's fine the way it is.

Thanks so much for picking my brain with this. I will always talk about my work I love it so much

[29pageshomestuckeveryday]

Homestuck, page 1,149

[S] Enter.

Storyboards: http://readmspa.org/storyboards/01149.swf.html

Song used: Sburban Jungle by Michael Guy Bowman

Author commentary:

Here is the end of act animation, [S] Enter. Panels are sliding around the screen. They're showing stuff. Things are happening. It's exciting.

0:47 - Look at how I was still switching her shirt logo around even in the middle of a Flash. This is called attention to detail.

1:05 - And there goes the bed. If only the bed could have burned to death on its Quest Bedbed.

1:20 - Look at Dave putting all this stuff in these terrible inconvenient locations. What a jackass!

1:28 - The real hero of Act 3: a 20 foot tall, 10 ton stone statue of Zazzerpan the Learned. Those Zazzerstats are canon btw.

1:41 - Rose was eager to play this game in the first place so she could resurrect her dead cat, AND GOD DAMMIT THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SHE'S GOING TO DO. All these flaming tornadoes and flying wizards can go to hell.

1:57 - There's this whole spiel on Sburb's "entry items" and what they mean, which I won't get into now. But here's another brief spin on it. John's was an apple from a tree, obviously like the one from the bible. In that tale, the apple represented a temptation to Adam and Eve, and trouble was a-lurkin' if they took a bite. In retrospect the liquor bottle similarly represents a kind of temptation in the context of this character arc.

2:31 - Usually with acts in Homestuck, there's something that happens at the end that brings the act back full circle. Act 3 started with Nanna's inscription to John, and here we see when and how that was written, while getting a very brief glimpse of what's under the clouds and thus a peek at the much bigger story waiting for us to discover.

2:36 - One wonders if she was aware Dave had given Jaspers some useful tentacles to bail her out with before she jumped. It was quite a leap of faith. Or just outright suicidal. The Lalondes and Striders are basically all cuckoo bananas. But anyways, let's reflect on the teamwork involved to make everything work. Rose bringing Jaspers back, Dave making him a princess, Jaspers saving Rose… God teamwork is great. So is friendship. If your story isn't in some way basically about friendship and teamwork, you are failing hilariously at your job.

2:50 - In [this part of the] montage we see a very quick rewind of WV blasting off in his big can. Which turns out to be the cork of a huge bottle, the unsurprising shape of the exile station which formed in Rose's crater. Exile station designs are based on the entry item of that location. As if you didn't know that already.

2:58 - Sure cuttin' it close there Rose… My characters never listen to me.

3:01 - The thing being revealed here: Dave's copy of the game has been stored in this lotus time capsule for millions of years. WHAT?? Yes, the same juice-stained copies currently on the roof below his window. How do they get here? This is how most mysteries work in Homestuck. You know a thing is going to happen in the future, but you don't know why or how. So you just keep reading, while screaming.

3:02 - The animation just keeps on going, and the song "Sburban Jungle" sorta bumps it up a notch. John proceeds to climb his house while kicking imp and ogre ass. There are a few moments in the earlier acts which seem to trick you into thinking Homestuck is all about getting cool gear, gaining levels, and kicking ass like you expect to do in such games. This is kind of misleading though. In totality, HS isn't really about ass-kicking at all. It's about presenting awesome fantasy environments and situations in which ass-kicking could THEORETICALLY take place, but very rarely does except in dramatic hot points like this. Instead, those environments serve as backdrops for a huge amount of dicking around on the internet, babbling to friends about feelings, and being a bunch of stupid useless kids struggling to grow up. If you are ever under the impression HS is about anything else, you are invariably in for a world of hurt.

3:25 - The best part of the animation is when John just runs up and clocks a hapless imp in the face. Don't even try to tell me it isn't.

3:29 - Whereas this imp gets inadvertently Cosby'd into the pit. You'd think John would later find the Cosbytop lying around somewhere down there, but I don't think that's what happens. I think he just makes another one?? Why the hell not. The great thing about alchemy is it puts very little premium on almost any single object. Except ones which are Plot Critical to be unique, like the game disc, or the matriorb. It's almost like… the game knows when an item is plot critical?? It's almost like… my brain as the author of the story IS the game???

3:34 - Then John boings into the thing. The end.

[fragiledewdrop]

tagged by @all-the-bad-dreams-that-you-hide (thanks<3)

Rules: answer the questions and tag fifteen mutuals.

1. Are you named after anyone?

No, I am not. That’d be cool!

2. When was the last time you cried?

This is a bit embarrassing, but I tend to cry when I reach the emotional parts in books, no matter how underwhelming,how sappy, how dry or how well known. So the last time I cried was yesterday, when I was rereading Montaigne’s essay on friendship. His best friend was dead, okay? He saw him die! How can I not cry? Sue me.

3. Do you have kids?

Luckily for them, no

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Oh yes, and a lot of the time people don’t realize I am using it.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their eyes or their hair.

6. What’s your eye colour?

A warm brown. They look greenish under the right light.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I am not a big fan of scary movies, so I’ll go with happy endings- although I really enjoy melancholic stories that have no clear-cut resolution.

8. Any special talents?

Dogs tend to like me, even when those that aren’t usually very affectionate- It’s awesome :)

9. Where were you born?

At a hospital in central Italy. Fun fact: one of my friends currently works there as an obstetrician and she has told me repeatedly that it is one of the worst places to give birth.

10. What are your hobbies?

Cross stitch, writing, cooking, making jewellery and taking long walks.

11. Have you any pets?

An orange cat named Mir.

12. What sports do you play/have played?

I used to do synchronized swimming as a teen. I loved it, and I wasn’t bad at it, but I had to stop because it didn’t leave me much time to study. Last summer I did water aerobics with a bunch of 60 yer old women. I wish I could do it all year round. I really miss exercising right now.

13. How tall are you?

162 cm

14. Favorite subject in school?

It was definitely Italian, and philosophy was a close second. In general, I tend to go crazy for any kind of literature.

15. Dream job?

I am aiming for translator or interpreter, depending on which post-grad program I manage to get into. I am excited about it. My other semi-secret dream is becoming a university professor, but I doubt that'll ever happen and I am fine with it. Still, in life you never know.

I am tagging @mirandasinclairs, @postmodernmulticoloredcloak , @vengefulnoob , @procasdeanating , @castiel-left-his-mark-on-me , @pancsaa , @notsogracefulhearts , @reblogthiscrapkay and whoever else wants to do it.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

238 of 2023

Descriptives What is your name?

Joeri.

What is your age?

33 in two weeks.

When is your Birthday?

In two weeks.

Where were you born?

Belgium. My hometown is Middelkerke.

What city/state/country do you live in?

Bruges, Belgium.

Are you single, married, seperated, divorced or widowed?

Married.

What is the highest level of education you have completed?

Bachelor of Applied Sciences lol.

What is the name of the last school you attended (or currently attending)?

Do you really think I’m gonna share private details here?

Are you currently employed?

Yeah, I am.

If “yes”, what is your job title?

Operator/electrician.

What is your race?

White. I’m fully European, from what I know.

What is your nationality?

Belgian. My heritage is Belgian, Dutch, German, and further French. But I’m considered Belgian due to being born here and holding this country’s citizenship. It’s normal in Europe, we don’t call heritage “nationality”.

What is your religious background?

I’m from mixed family, Protestant mum and Catholic dad. I don’t identify with any religion, though.

What is your political affiliation?

I avoid politics like a plague. I don’t identify as anything politically, but I believe in equality.

College Life What was your major?

Electrical engineering.

Why did you choose this major?

Because I was interested in it.

What was your minor?

What is minor? I don’t think our education system has something like that.

Why did you choose this minor?

N/A.

If you could go back to school, what would be your major?

I went to yet another uni to do yet another degree, standard Dutch language.

Do you have any plans to continue your education?

Yeah, when my speech gets better.

Were you in a sorority/fraternity? (Which one?)

No, I wasn’t.

Were you in any clubs? (Which one?)

No.

Were you in any professional organizations? (Which one?)

I think ACV doesn’t really count since it’s a labour union, and schools don’t really have anything to do with it.

What is your worst college memory?

One of the teachers was giving me a hard time.

What is your best college memory?

Actually obtaining my degree.

If anything, what would you differently?

Differently what?

What did you enjoy most about college?

Learning.

What did you enjoy least about college?

Some people and some teachers.

How would you describe your college self?

How am I supposed to describe it? I haven’t changed much.

How would you describe your college friends?

I’ve got some guys I’ve been going to the secondary school with, we always hanged out together.

Are you still in touch with your college friends?

Sadly, I’m not.

How were your grades in college?

Pretty good.

What was your favorite course in college?

All of them.

What was you least favorite course in college?

None of them.

Work life What was the first job you ever had?

Fruit picker, as a teenager.

What is the worst memory of your first job?

Having to work in the cold.

What is the best memory of your first job?

Earning my first money and getting to know awesome people.

How did you get this job?

I was looking for some summer jobs suitable for teenagers.

What was your pay?

We were paid daily, depending on how much we picked.

Describe your current job

I’m an electrician/operator in the big French rolling stock manufacturing company. I produce electricazl components and install them in train carriages, previously I was wiring control racks, too.

Describe your current work environment

It’s awesome. Much noise, chemicals, heavy machinery. But I love it. I’ve made some great friends here.

What is the best part of your job?

We are free to look like we want to, with an exception for our work clothes, which are mandatory and all look the same. Nobody cares if we have tattoos or piercings. I’m being widely appreciated as a good and experienced worker, and the atmosphere is amazing, lots of great people there.

What is the worst part of your job?

I think we should be paid more because it’s us who find and correct all the mistakes that engineers do.

How did you get this job?

Someone suggested it to me when I graduated.

Describe your relationship with your boss

He’s a good man. He appreciates me very much and appartently finds me a very valuable worker. I remember him as my team leader before he became my boss, and we’ve always been in good terms. My previous boss was my favourite boss ever, though.

What would be your dream job?

The one I have now.

What is the best office prank you’ve pulled?

I don’t work in the office, but I’m known for pulling harmless “pranks” at my workplace; mostly I just do funny things to entertain my workmates. For example, one day I altered the logo of my company on my work helmet into something that means “dumb” in Dutch, and I was walking like that. The other day I attached the company logo printed on A4 paper sheet to my hoodie (which is not a part of my uniform) and I was walking like that, too.

What is the worst office prank you’ve received?

I can’t think of anything.

What do you wear to work?

Work clothes. Cargo trousers, a t-shirt with the logo of our company on the back, black zipped hoodie because I don’t like our work sweaters (yay rebel), and safety boots. Occasionally yellow vest and/or a helmet while going under the carriage.

Where do you go during lunch?

I work half days.

Where do you go after work?

To my physiotherapist, and then travels around the country.

Have you ever ever dated a co-worker?

Not really dated, but I was friends with one and now we’re married.

Where do you see yourself five years from now?

Here where I live now.

How old do you think you will be when you retire?

Probably over 60. It’s normal in my country.

Relationships How old were you when you had your first boyfriend/girlfriend?

I was 22. Never been interested in relationships before.

How old were you when you had your first kiss?

Also 22. Never felt like kissing anyone before. To be honest, I still don’t enjoy kissing.

How old were you when you met your first love?

23.

How old were you when you lost your virginity?

24. Never wanted it before, but I know it was with the right person.

Who was your first kiss?

Jay.

Who was your first love?

Nielsje.

Are you still in touch with your first love?

Yeah. We remained close friends after our break up.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, I don’t. It’s more like infatuation. At least I’ve never experienced it in my life, so this is why I have no confirmed reason to believe in it.

Do you make the first move when you meet someone?

No, I don’t. I’m too shy for that, I guess.

Have you been or are in love?

Well, I love. But am I in love? Hard to say. My feelings are confusing to me.

How would describe love?

It’s an individual thing. Everyone experiences it differently, I think, and there are more kinds of love than just romantic.

How do you know when you’re in love?

I don’t know. I only know I love, when I deeply care about someone, I feel happy to see them or interact with them, and I feel comfortable around them.

Have you ever had your heart broken?

Yeah, I’ve had.

Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

Apparently I did, more than once.

Describe your worst break-up

With Jay, he broke up with me, then threatened to kill himself. It was an awful time to me.

Do you miss anybody you use to be with?

No, because we still keep in touch.

What is the longest time you’ve been in a relationship?

Five years and counting.

Do you believe in unconditional love?

Yes, but I don’t think it’s always healthy.

What was the reason behind your most stupid argument?

Both me and my husband are incredibly stubborn and neither of us wants to let go.

Do you have a problem with saying “I’m sorry”?

Yes, but I often feel sorry.

How do you make up for your mistake to your partner?

I do little acts of service to him, or give him small gifts. This is my love language, though.

What would you do if your partner cheated on you?

That’s a deal breaker. Jay was cheating on me with multiple guys and left me feeling worthless.

Describe your dream proposal

I’ve already had one lol. It was unconventional, without a ring or anything, but I accepted.

Describe your dream wedding

I got married and we just went and did it, no party or anything. It was perfect.

Describe your dream honeymoon

Long road trip or a week in a big city. Yay.

Do you enjoy public displays of affection?

No, omg. They kinda put me off.

Do you like to hold hands in public?

No, I don’t. I don’t feel the need to do it, and neither does my husband.

Would you rather die before your partner or vice versa?

...WTF.

How many kids do you want to have?

None.

What would you name your baby girl?

No.

What would you name your baby boy?

Nope.

Your Childhood What did you want to be when you grew up?

A soldier.

What was your favorite Halloween costume?

We never celebrated that crap.

What was your favorite holiday?

Christmas and summer vacation because I spent it at my grandma’s.

What was your favorite game?

No.

What was your favorite TV show?

Old British sitcoms, like now.

What was your favorite song?

Way too many, I’ve always loved music.

What was your favorite candy?

I’ve never been fond of candy.

What was your favorite article of clothing?

Never paid attention to it.

Who was your hero?

My dad.

What were you scared of?

Vacuum cleaners.

What made you happiest?

Vacations at our grandma’s.

What is your fondest memory with your father?

Travelling around.

What is your fondest memory with your mother?

Can’t really think of any.

What is your fondest memory with your siblings?

Oh, there’s too many. We’ve always been close.

How would you describe yourself as a child?

A little rebel with permanently bruised legs.

What do you miss most about your childhood?

These careless times, playing outside with friends, not having smartphones or even the internet. Freedom, where it was hard to get us into our houses, rather than getting us outside, like it happens now.

What is the most important lesson you learned as a child?

That it was not my fault.

Now and the Future What is your favorite food?

Waterzooi.

What is your favorite restaurant?

Chinese Wok or Bavet.

Where do you go for peace and quiet?

To my hometown.

Where do you go for comfort?

To my husband.

Where do you go to have fun?

To work. Literally.

What is your favorite alcoholic drink?

Beer and white wine.

What is your favorite bar?

The Irish pub in my city.

What is your favorite weekend activity?

Groceries, lol. I travel enough during the week.

What is your favorite sport?

Basketball.

What is your favorite book?

Too many to count. I love books.

[xiaq]

Big Freaking Announcement

I’m not sure how to say this because I’m trying to temper my excitement with the knowledge that some folks might be disappointed (or even angry). I guess I should start with:

I’ll be taking Like Real People Do down from AO3 in 48 hours.*

If you want to go download it before it’s gone, now would be the time.

But why? You ask. Well, that’s the exciting bit.

As I was writing LRPD, it sort of ran away from me into something that was a lot less fan fiction and a lot more original fiction. And then I had so many ideas about future stories I could write (Martel and Okezie, Matts and his future queer partner), but I didn’t think I could write them on AO3 because, well, they wouldn’t be fic! I also, simultaneously, realized that academia was not the pretty pastoral walk in the park I expected. After talking to my therapist about what I actually wanted to do with my life, I reworked LRPD into a piece of original fiction and started sending out queries.

I’m DELIGHTED to report that I’ll be signing a publishing contract with NineStar Press. Not just for LRPD, but for a whole series of books about queer hockey players. I am so excited.

Some questions you might have:

Why are you removing the fic version?

That's required as part of the publishing contract for copyright reasons. If I could legally leave it up, I would!

They’re publishing all 150k words??

Yes, but LRPD will be separated into two books that, in their current form (as I undertake revisions) are about 80k words each.

When will it be published/where can I find it?

I don’t have a date yet, but it should be within 6-12 months and I’ll keep everyone apprised of things via Tumblr and IG. You’ll be able to find it at bookstores or amazon or directly from me if you want a signed copy!

Will you still write fic?

Of COURSE. Most of my fic is written purely because I love the source material, and it’s so immersed in that material (Sherlock, Bond, Harry Potter, TOG, The Mandalorian) that I couldn’t (and wouldn’t want to) scrub it. I like playing in these universes and I have no desire to stop. The awesome thing about potentially being an author full-time one day is that I can likely write more fic if I don’t have a standard day job (especially one like professor-ing) taking up the majority of my time.

Will you do a book tour?

Possibly. It depends on initial sales and some other things, but I’ll definitely do some signings in Austin/Dallas/Houston, etc. provided there’s interest.

Why would you Betray Fandom by scrubbing fic and then selling it?

I fully support writers scrubbing their fic and publishing it, provided they tell me where I can buy the new version and give at least a day's advance warning before they remove the fic online. I have and will continue to support fic writers traversing the line between fic and original fiction because I don’t see anything wrong with that.

I’m tired. God, I’m tired. I've been working 60-70hr weeks and trying to squeeze in 30 minutes of writing before I fall asleep each night since my weekends involve either More Work or Hiking/Climbing. I'm barely getting a chapter of fic finished per month. My schedule is definitely better now than it was 3 months ago, but I'm still super busy and have little time to write for myself. This is a chance for me to get paid to do a thing I love that will also, hopefully, facilitate me living a healthier, happier, life. I’m going to take it. *I'm going to try and remove the individual chapter content while still leaving the work up so I have access to all the comments because they basically sustained me through graduate school and I don't want to lose them. Does anyone know if that will work?

[genyawritesshizz]

Part 4 of my Monty x animatronic reader

Angst

Angst

Not going to lie I’m having horrible writers block trying to write this chapter so I’m sorry if it’s quality is not as good as the others. I have ideas for the story but getting there is a struggle.😮‍💨

“Don’t worry (y/n) you got this thing in the bag!” You where currently sitting at a table with the Glamrock gang, Chica of course mowing down on a pizza per usual yet between her handfuls of it she still reassured you.

“Yeah dude chill out it’ll be okay” Roxanne rolled her eyes she was supposed to be the dramatic one.

“Yes I completely agree superstar! All the tours you’ve given me have been wonderful, and the coffee is outstanding!” Freddy ever the kind bear allowed you to give him fifty thousand mock tours to practice for today and Chica was more than willing to try any drink on the menu. They had truly been amazing friends to you the past few nights. Although ever since that first night on the catwalk Monty had been very distant, never really saying anything to you. It hurt honestly. The way he made you feel was something you’d never experienced before, you think, and to have to ignore you just made you ache. You never ventured to rockstar row before but you had half a mind to go see him. However whenever you asked about Monty not being present they all said it was best to avoid him for right now. Something about him destroying his room and lots of yelling. Yeah it was probably best to give him some space, besides during the tours you’ll see him sometime. Through the aching you felt joyful to see him.

The sounds of the front door opening alerted you to the first staff member entering.

“Alright guys show time!” Freddy and the others retreated to the stage front while you hid behind the giant display they’d position right at the front door. It was like a giant curtain that you would walk out of once they announce you. Unfortunately you would have to wait in anticipation for a good hour after the place opened for everyone to get rallied together for the big announcement.

“Oh gosh” you could hear the crowd growing and growing. Your metaphorical stomach was doing backflips, you couldn’t help but pace around the small area.

“Ladies and Gentlemen may i when your attention please!”

Oh here we go almost show time.

“Would everyone please put your hands together for the newest edition to the Freddy Fazbears pizza plex (y/n) the kangaroo!” The curtains opened and there you stood with your hands held high in the air waving to the dozens of cheering children. they all stared at you with pure amazement. Everything was a blur from then on. You came out of the display and high-fived, hugged and waved at about thirty children. They all absolutely adored you saying things like “I love your fur!” “You’re so awesome!” And lots of “Wow!” ’s. Your heart pounded with absolute love at this. Your fears slowly died when realizing they loved you already.

“For today only (y/n) will be giving free tours!” The children screamed. “After the tour be sure to check the gift shop for the newest merchandise!”

With the introduction out of the way you lined up the first tour and began starting with the main atrium and working your way back. Unfortunately the adoring crowd couldn’t calm your nerves about seeing Monty again. Throughout all the tours you had yet to spot him. Was he hiding from you? Of course not that silly! He wouldn’t do that! Would he?

Luckily for the crowd you ran into Roxan and Chica a dozen times and managed to slip in some interesting facts about chickens and wolves. The crowd loved it!

Though the day went by swimmingly with back to back tours you barely had anytime to pop into the cafe, luckily they had hired a team of works to assist in running the shop while you where away.

Some kids loved you so much they b-lined it for the gift shop to purchase a plushie of you! Seeing them hold a mini you close to their hearts made you melt. Wow this is your job… making children happy. Is there anything better?

Hm… there it is again. A sense of dejavu? It’s like you’ve felt this way before. But that’s impossible this is your first day online with children… right? You can shack the odd feeling in your chest.

“Ladies and gentlemen please make your way to the stage! The main show will be beginning shortly!” The children in your current tour exploded with absolute glee.

“Alright kids let’s go catch us a bear!” With that you marched your happy troop of screaming children to the main stage. Allowing them to disperse and find seats around the stage. This finally gave you a bit of free time to pop into the cafe and relax for a bit. You could always watch the show from inside anyways, it had a giant flatscreen for those who didn’t want to be in the crowd to watch.

“Hey (y/n)! Taking a break?” Said one of the cafe staff members from behind the counter. You simply nodded at them and took a seat at a bar seat beside a lone women. The flatscreen was mounted right behind the bar. You where excited to see everyone perform… and to see Monty. But right at the show began you felt someone staring at you. Turning to the side you saw the women you had sat next to ogling you.

“Hi! I’m (y/n) the kangaroo!” You greeted her. The women said nothing as she continued to stare. It made you a bit uncomfortable coming from an adult, normally it was children that stared without saying anything. But no matter, you allowed her to keep looking adults can be curious to! You glanced back at the screen. Freddy and the gang where no on stage greeting everyone.

“Can’t believe they actually remodeled (y/n) the kangaroo from batys. Even after the accident.”

‘Processing error’

‘Processing’

‘Processing’

.

.

.

“What did you say?” You stood from the seat towering over the women. Eyes wide and staring into her soul.

What did she mean by that? What the hell is going on?? Your sensors are going crazy trying to process what she had just said. Something about it just lit a fire under you, and you don’t even know what it meant.

What is batys? Who is baty? Accident? What accident?

“wow wow! Back up (y/n) you’re scaring her!” The same staff that had greeted you came barreling over at the scene before her. You where standing inches away from the cowering women in her seat. The poor lady looked like she was about to piss herself. Finally you got a grip on reality and out of your frantic thoughts. Leaning back and away from the women you blinked a couple time and sat back down.

“My deepest apologies ma’am! You just caught me off guard! Here have a complimentary coffee!” The women shacking did nothing but sit there, probably to frightened to move.

You where lured back to the screen before you as the music blasted through the cafe. Though you where watching it your mind was else where.

Remember.

Remember.

What is she talking about?

‘What else do you know?’

“Uh (y/n) I think it’s time for you to give another tour!”

“Huh, oh right, thank you!” You can out of the cafe and to the adoring crowd waiting for you. “Okay kids let’s go on an adventure!”

“Yay!!” They screamed

.

.

‘Welcome to Batys barbecue!’

.

.

This required further research. After hours you would conduct an extensive internal and internet search for answers. This could either be a coding error or… something else.

.

.

“Attention all Freddy fazbear mega pizza plex guests the mall is now closed please exit the building!”

“Ahhh (y/n)! You did so well! They loved you!” Chica of course ran up to you as soon as the doors closed to give you a big hug. You returned it of course.

“You did alright, except in the end when you got all fuckin’ weird!” Roxanne came around the corner from rockstar row, slinging an arm around Chica.

“Roxanne be nice! Maybe she was just nervous! It’s okay we all have our little hick-ups out there!”

“No she’s right! I had a bit of a malfunction while you guys where performing…” you lightly kicked at the ground, a bit embarrassed.

“What do you mean malfunction? Do you need to go to parts and service! Did one of the kids spill something on you? Oh gosh I remember the first time I had fizzy faz spilled on me! It was a nightmare to clean! Made my wires all hunker up and stinky. I mean we’re water proof but sti-” you quickly put you hands up defensively trying to stop Chica’s rambling.

“No no! Nobody spilled anything on me! And I already ran a self diagnostics test everything’s working perfectly it’s just I feel like somethings wrong.” She gave you a perplexed look, her eyes doing a quick one over you to try and see if there was anything visibly wrong with you. Roxanne simply rolled her eyes, and she thought she was a drama queen.

“Look newby it’s probably just nerves, we all got them our first time, well except me. I’ve been perfect since the beginning!” This earned a light elbowing from Chica.

“She’s probably right (y/n), it is probably just your nerves!”

“Chica report to the cleaning station! Chica report to the cleaning station!” A robotic tone yelled through the loud speaker, cutting their conversation short.

“Well, it’s time for my weekly cleaning! Try not to worry about it to much! I’m sure by next week everything will be great!"

The peppy little chicken required weekly cleanings due to her addiction to eating anything to even resembled food. Though, you’d never witnessed it yourself you heard from rumors within the staff that they’d caught her digging in the trash a couple times.

Of course wherever Chica goes Roxy goes, the two chatted together as the descended down the halls.

Something deep within your subconscious told you that this wasn’t just stress, no this was something more. Something that you should remember, something so important yet, no matter how hard you tried nothing popped up. Maybe it was best if you retreated back to your room. As in, the parts and service area. Until they could properly build you a room you’d forever be confined to the dark and depressing parts and service room. You didn’t even have a proper charging station, you had to manually hook into the main power banks. Oh well, it is what it is for now. Taking your hat off and moving aside a the tufts of fur you found the charging port located at the back of your head. Setting down with your back turned to the wall you grabbed the power cord and plugged in. It was a very odd feeling to say the least…. You closed your eyes and let the power flow through you.

“…l. ve… ou… (y/n)! D… f…r…et….

Please!…”

A scream rattled through your brain.

It wasn’t yours.

It wasn’t of anyone you recognized. Jolting up from the floor you dislodged the charging cable with force.

“Gosh! Ouch!” You rubbed the back of your head, the spot sore from the forceful tug. “What… what was that?” The voice felt like a distant memory now, as you tried to recall what it said. “Running voice analysis” you ran the voice through the pizza plex’s customer database, maybe it was something someone had said to you earlier? If not the analysis will identify if this voice belonged to a customer that’s ever been in the plex.

“Data entry error.” Huh, so they must not be a customer… if not then where did you hear this voice at? Running through your memories one last time you still failed to find anything. Though something tucked at you to look deeper.

‘Old suit.’ You thought, wait “old suit? What? You’re brand new! You don’t have an old suit!” You poor circlets felt fried from the pure about of over thinking. Since roxy and Chica where busy, and Monty seems to be ignoring you maybe you should go see Freddy. He’ll know what to do! You grabbed your hat and fashioned it back on your head.

Just as you where about to exit the parts and service room a little clanking sound caught you attention. It came from the corner of the room. Cautiously approaching it you found what appeared to be a little ‘spider’ animatronic. He held to small cymbals and a rather dapper top hat on.

“Hello there?” You questioned, it quickly turned around to face you. It looked almost scared. “I’m (y/n), who are you?” It’s pink eyebrows rose up for a second as if studying you. Before bowing it’s head in a greeting. “Are you lost little guy?” It shook its head before turning back to the wall it was facing. Upon walking closer to it you notice that it was in fact not a wall but a door.

How had you never noticed this door before?

“Oh are you trying to go in there? Here let me!” But upon trying to open the door you where met with a warning sign.

‘Level 10 security clearance required. Access denied.’

“That’s strange, I thought all animatronics had full access.” The little spider simply shook his head and looked up at you before darting up your leg. “Ah! Hey what are you doing!” Before you could fling the little guy off he’d jumped from your hat to the open vent above the door. He disappeared through the vent.

“What a stage little guy.” You’d certainly have to question Freddy about why you couldn’t access this door and what on earth that thing was. It was about three hours till opening time so you’d have to make it snappy. The way to rockstar row was short and silent until you reached the actual hall. The sounds of someone yelling caught you attention. It sounded awful. Glass shattering and wood splintering echoed out. Quickly you knocked on Freddy’s door. The lovable bear answered.

“Freddy! What is going on?!” You ushered you inside a nervous look on his face.

“Uhh… well you know how we talked about Monty having his ‘moments’ well he is having one.” Oh… ohhh this is why they told you to avoid him. He has temper tantrums. Makes sense. “He is very angry and just needs to let out some steam! That is all! Nothing to worry about!” He seems to be hiding something but you won’t press him about it now. You had your own quest.

“Freddy I need to ask you something, it’s very important.” He quickly shock off the nervous demeanor and got serious.

“Yes of course what is it?” You looked him in the eyes.

“Am I… new?”

“Well of course! You just arived at the pizza plex a month ago! You’re brand new!”

“That’s not what I meant, I mean am I brand new? Like when I came here did I have… a different suit?” He looked down at his feet.

“I… I do not know. Your endo skeleton is of an older model so it is possible that you could be from a different location. Why? Is something wrong? I assure you that we do not look down on you for being older! In fact I come from a long generation of Fazbears! My original model is from the 60’s!” He put a reassuring paw on your shoulder and brought you in for a hug, which you gladly accepted.

“No nothing wrong that I can tell, it’s just I think I need to see my old suit… for closer I guess.” He rubbed your back.

“I understand but, I’m also not sure where they would store such a thing.”

“I have an idea. There’s another door inside the parts and service room, but I don’t have the clearance to go through it. Do you?” He pulled away from the hug, his eyebrows furrowed.

“I’m sorry superstar but if you do not have the clearance I cannot allow you to go in…” you felt disheartened you knew the rules, and you knew it was a long shot to ask Freddy to break them for you.

“I’m sorry for asking..”

“Hey it’s okay! T-” Freddy’s door slammed open revealing a teary eyes alligator with disheveled hair. He looked wrecked, the tiny pieces of glass scattered across his form shimmered in the neon lights of Freddy’s room. Chunks of green wall paper clung to his clawed hands.

“Fre-” he finally looked up from the floor and the eyes he met where not the bright blues he was expecting. Instead the two of you made wide eyed eye contact for what felt like forever.

“Monty? What is it that you need? (Y/n) and I where just having a nice chat!” Freddy tried to draw your attention away from the fact Monty looked like he’s been through hell and back but it didn’t stop you from staring.

“Nothin’ ” Monty turned in the doorway, inches away from being gone. Instinct took ahold of you and you bounded over to the now gator.

“Wait Monty!” Your soft pink paw pads landed on his shoulder pad halting him in his tracks. Though he didn’t bother to look back at you. “Can… can we talk to? Maybe not here but…” you looked down at the floor. Monty’s shoulder relaxed under your touch and he sighed.

“I guess.” Was all he said before shugging it off and walking off again this time slower allowing you to trail behind him. You briefly turned back to Freddy. He had a weird look on his face, like he was nervous but happy. Yeah that old bear knew something.

Making your way to Monty’s room you hesitated behind him for a second before entering and immediately stepping on a pile of shredded cotten. Upon closer inspection you find a shredded doll of… yourself.

Yikes…

The poor star shaped vanity mirror in the corner was smashed to pieces, that explains where the broken glass came from. The walls had huge gashes taken out of them along with giant fist shaped holes.

“Sorry ‘bout the mess.” You tried to ignore the poor replica of you shredded to pieces on the floor and return to Monty who flopped down on the couch. The poor thing was split in half and struggled to hold the gator.

He ran a clawed hand through his hair and tried to shake the pieces of glass out with little to no precision.

“Here let me help.” Bounding over before he could stop you, you began picking the tiny clear specks out. He sighed again.

Being this close to him again made your internal processors heat up with excitement. It took everything in you to focus at the task at hand and only pick out the glass not rub your hands through his luscious red locks. His hands however where locked to his sides as if he where afraid to move. Head tilted down for you to get a better look.

Hmm how those hands wrapped around your waist the other night was nice. Made you feel all kinds of warmth and happiness… oh yeah that’s why you wanted to talk to him.

“Look Monty… did I do something the other night? Im so sorry if I made you mad or-” his head shot up your hands falling from the frizzed locks.

“No.”

“Then… why have you been avoiding me?” You hands now crossed over your chest. The two of you locked eyes.

“Because… well” In all honesty he was the gator was at a lose for words. He wasn’t sure how to put his feelings into words. He was never good at it that’s why he always went to Freddy to vent about how he felt. Contrary to popular belief Monty and Freddy got along swimmingly. Their ‘rivalry’ was just a stunt pulled by corporate to boost sales.

“Well? Do you not… like me?”

“No! It’s not that it’s actually the opposite. Look (y/n) I like you. I’m not sure what it is but I just can’t keep my eyes off ya.”

“Then why have you been ignoring me?” Testing the limits you stepped close to him. The two of you now less than a foot apart.

“I… I don’t want you to think I’m taking advantage of you. You’re new…”

“I see… look Monty I don’t know exactly what this feeling is but I know that when I’m around you I get happy.”

Huh, weird as the words left your mouth it almost felt like you went into auto pilot. As if you’ve spoke these exact words before…

The two of you engaged in deep eye contact for a solid few minutes, searching deep within each others very being to see if there was ever a hint of unsure or uneasy. Slowly his clawed hand came up to your face. Finding a lone piece of your fur. He twisted the hair between his fingers a bit before tucking it behind your jaw.

“You’re just hypnotizing sha.” His large palm now rested on the side of your face. Gently caressing it. “I just don’t want you to feel like uncomfortable around me.”

Bringing your much smaller paw up you leaned into his touch.

“You could never make me uncomfortable Monty.” The two of you fell into a deep lull of this sweet embrace. His head coming to rest against your chest as His thumb gently rubbed at the soft tan fur of your checks. Your fingers tiny in comparison to his glided over each knuckle until

“Oh” you felt something sharp rip at your finger tip. Upon glancing to the side you noticed that Monty’s hand plate had multiple dents. Your finger had grazed over a rather large and sharp tear where the metal had broke open assumably against the wall. “Your hurt!”

You could feel his snout scrunch up against your chest. His hand pulled away from your face and he began to flex it around a bit.

“It’ll be alright.” His voice muffled.

“But Monty…” your hands reached down to try and tug his face up from your chest but the stubborn gator refused to budge.

“This ain’t nothin’. ”

‘Maybe if I take him to parts and service he can open the door for me…’

Wait where did that thought come from? Freddy had already told you that that room was off limits. But yet, something still absolutely gnawed away at you to go inside.

Have to find out.

But

Why?

“If you say so big guy.” You shook the thoughts from your head. The two of you where having a bonding moment no need to ruin it with these radical ideas. But that did have you wondering. Would Monty help you? Would be allow you in? Those where questions for another time. For now you continued to cuddle the alligator until his systems shut down in his resting state.

[tobesoalive]

r u mine? (Jake Kiszka x reader)

hey guys...so this was fun to write, thank you to the kind anon who requested it! I currently have some fun (and steamy) Josh stuff in the works right now, but still feel free to send in requests! I might slow down a little with posting since my classes started, but I promise to get to every request! Enjoy my first Jake piece!

Warnings: SMUT(oral f-recieving, fingering, penetrative sex)

Adrenaline pumped through your veins as you headed down the hallway backstage, about to go out and face the crowd of thousands of fans. No you weren't a huge famous musician or anything, just their photographer. Basically the same thing right?

For the past three weeks you had been enjoying life on the road, it had always been your dream to be a concert photographer, and your work had caught the attention of a little band called Greta Van Fleet. Well, not exactly little. Their fan base grew everyday and now they were doing yet another headlining tour that they asked you to document. Over the past few months you had been in contact with the guys and their management, and you guys hit it off instantly, they brought you under their wing as if you were part of the family.

You basically were all one big family, you had gotten extremely close to the boys. Josh, Sam and Danny were like your brothers, and Jake...he was a little different.

Brother would be an odd way to describe him, seeing as you had a bit of a crush on him. Nothing super serious, you just thought he was a cool guy who also happened to be really fucking hot. You thought he might have a little something for you too, he was always asking you how you liked the show, and when he’d catch you editing the photos you took he’d sit himself right next to you and ask if you’d show him what you were working on. He was constantly complimenting your work, but that would mostly be in private, when he’d seek you out if he couldn’t sleep. You surely weren’t complaining, you enjoyed his company. You just wish he would say something, or even better, make a move. You could be taking his actions the wrong way, he does have tons of women who want him all around the country, maybe he does just think of you as a sister. Whatever thoughts you had about Jake you’d just push to the back of your mind, you had a job to do, and your work was more important than getting laid.

You went in front of the barricade and took some photos of the crowd and talked to fans. They liked to ask you questions about the guys and what it was like touring with them. You always tried to make them feel special by saying how thankful the guys were, which wasn’t a lie, to have such amazing fans.

All of a sudden you heard some of the fans start screaming wildly. They were chanting Jake’s name, and you turned your head only to briefly meet his eyes from the side of the stage where he was standing. Within a second he was gone, most likely rushing backstage to avoid any further commotion from the audience.

What was that all about? You thought to yourself. Did he sneak over there to just look at me? Maybe he wanted to talk or something. That can happen later, it was only a few minutes until the show started, so you wanted to snap a few more shots of the crowd before running all over during the show to catch the right angles.

During the show you had a great time, as per usual. You loved being right up front, taking photos of the guys doing what they loved. You went backstage to get some photos from the wings. Jake was about to do his signature move, playing his guitar behind his head, and you were ready to capture the moment. Right as you snapped the photo, Jake turned and winked at you, arms thrown behind his head, somehow managing to play the notes of “Highway Tune” whilst flirting with you.

Butterflies erupted in your stomach, and you felt an intense need for him. Quickly you ran back out to the front of the stage to capture a few more moments before the show was over.

“God fucking dammit, I’m in deep” you muttered to yourself, before heading to the green room to congratulate the guys on the awesome show. You slipped through the crew heading on stage to clean up the equipment, turning a corner and bumping directly into Jake.

“Oh sorry! Great job out there tonight!” you say, trying your best not to blush. What was wrong with you, it was like you were a school girl or something.

“Thanks y/n! Did you get some good shots?”

“No, I made sure to get really shitty photos, especially of you”

“Are you being sarcastic?! Now that is something new!” he teased you.

“I just know how much you enjoy my sense of humor! I like to give back to the fans y’know” you quip back, causing him to break out into a smile.

“Hey the guys and quite a bit of the crew is gonna head out and probably find a bar or something once we’re done cleaning up. You wanna join?”

“Thanks for the offer, but I might just keep it lowkey tonight, I’d prefer to edit the photos tonight so I can explore whatever city we��re going to tomorrow.”

“Totally understandable, well I’ll catch you later!”

“Yeah for sure!” you say as you go off to find the rest of the guys.

After about a half hour of chatting and checking in with the rest of your tour mates, you decided it was time to change into your pajamas and spend the rest of the night staring at your computer screen, trying to edit as many photos as you can before inevitably passing out.

Getting onto the bus you shared with some other crew members, you kicked your Vans off before checking to see if anyone else was around. Seems like they all were opting to go out after the show, which meant you got the whole place to yourself. You traded out your concert outfit for a pair of shorts and a hoodie, getting prepared for your lengthy editing session.

You made yourself at home on the couch towards the front of the bus, turning on your speaker and playing music as loud as you wanted, getting straight to work.

It had felt like only a minute when you heard a knock on the door, but after checking your clock you realized an hour had already gone by. You peeked out the window only to see Jake’s figure standing there.

“Jacob! What’s up? I thought you were going to the bar?” you said as you opened the door to let him in.

“That show wore me out”

“Yeah you did amazing, I mean like you usually do” you say, stumbling over your words and internally punching yourself. God you were not smooth at all.

“Seems like we are some of the very few who decided to stay back, I was getting lonely in that tour bus.”

“Well you’re always welcome here, I was just doing some editing.”

“Wow you’re a pretty big nerd aren’t you? You know you should take a break every once and a while, I feel like you’re constantly working.”

“Well it’s not that hard when you love your job” you tell him.

“I guess that's true, can I see what you’re working on?”

“Yeah of course” you say while making your way back to the couch, Jake plopping down next to you.

“Damn that’s fucking awesome” he remarks, looking at the image on your screen. It’s the one of him playing the guitar behind his head, and winking right at you.

“I know! Thanks for being such a good model” you tell him with a small laugh.

“The guys and management are really impressed with your work. We’ve already been talking about having you come on the European leg of the tour with us.”

“Are you for real?!” you ask in awe, giddy with excitement. You absolutely loved this job and the people, and the thought that you could travel the world to do it was a dream come true.

“Yeah, don’t tell anyone though, I don’t want to get my ass beat for it.”

“Oh my god Jake I could literally kiss you!” you exclaimed, before you had even realized what you said.

You tried your best to play it off before your thoughts were interrupted by Jake’s voice.

“I wish you would”

“Huh” you stop for a second before turning to face him.

“Listen y/n, I think you’re really cool, and you also happen to be really hot. Sorry, maybe I was interpreting things wrong. I just thought if you felt the same it might be fun. It doesn’t have to be anything serious, I just get lonely on the road and -”

Before he could say another word, you took it upon yourself to answer his question, leaning in to capture his lips in a soft kiss. You pull back and look him in the eyes, closing your laptop and setting it on the counter.

“God I’m glad you finally said something, I think everyone was starting to sense the sexual tension” you grin at him.

“Well all I could think about on stage was fucking your brains out, so sorry if I’m not too great at hiding it” he says before grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you in for another kiss, to which you open your mouth to let his tongue slip in.

You move yourself so that you’re straddling his lap, your lips moving perfectly in rhythm as Arctic Monkeys played softly in the background.

“Wow it seems like you were almost expecting this to happen” he teases you.

“Shut up and fuck me Kiszka” you say before he flips you so you’re now beneath him.  

His fingers find their way under your shirt, reaching up to cup your breast. He pinched your nipple before quickly tugging at the hem of your sweatshirt.

“Can this come off?” he breathed into your mouth.

“Yes please” you said before he pulled it off you, exposing your bare chest to him. You felt very self conscious, it had been a little while since you had gotten naked with anyone.

“Hey don’t be shy, you’re gorgeous” he said before connecting your lips once more before he stood up to remove his shirt and shorts, leaving him in a pair of boxer briefs. You tried your best to not look at his growing bulge, but it was hard to resist.

Suddenly he was kneeling on the ground, body in between your spread legs.

“Jake you really don’t have to” “Oh trust me, I want to, '' he says before running his fingers up and down over your clothed core, moving his fingers to the waistband of your shorts, pulling your panties down with them.

“God you’re so fucking sexy” he mutters before expertly pressing the pad of his thumb onto your clit, his other hand pushing on your thigh to keep your legs spread.

“Fuck, Jake, I need more” you groan, your arousal now dripping between your folds.

“Don’t worry baby girl, I’ve got you”

Those words alone probably could have made you cum, but then Jake entered a finger into you, causing your hands to tangle in his long hair, slightly pulling.

“Goddamn babe you’re tight” he said, looking at you in awe before adding another finger and leaning down to toy your clit with the tip of his tongue. His fingers were pumping in and out of you at a steady rhythm, and every so often he’d curl them to perfectly hit your g-spot.

“Jake you need to stop or else I’m gonna cum” you say as you pull his head back, looking him in the eyes.

“That’s okay” he reassures you.

“No, when I cum I want it to be around you” you say.

“Fucking hell y/n” he groans out in a raspy voice.

You get up and kiss him before pushing him down on the couch, his erection straining against the fabric of his boxers. You tug at the waistband, and he lifts his hips up to assist you. You took a moment to admire his length before wrapping your hand around it. He was a couple inches above average, with a nice girth to him. His head tipped back in bliss as you continued to give him a few more strokes before positioning yourself above him, running his tip back and forth across your slit. Slowly, you sank yourself down onto him, taking as much of him in as you could.

“Fuck fuck fuck Jake, you’re really fucking big” you breath out, only able to fit about half of him in you at this angle.

“Just do what you can baby” he says before softly pressing a kiss on your forehead, telling you that it was okay.

You started moving yourself up and down on him as best you could, starting to adjust more to his size. The stretch burned but slowly started turning more pleasurable.

After a few minutes your legs were starting to hurt and his length slipped out of you.

“Will you fuck me from behind?” you blurt out, sweat running between the valley of your breasts.

“I’d be honored” Jake responds, offering a smile before getting up.

He moves you so that your hands are on the back of the couch, holding you steady and your knees rest on the edge of the sofa, sticking your ass out towards Jake. You can hear him move behind you, hands finding their way to your ass, before you feel him run his tip up and down your slit once again.

“Ready?” he asks.

You nod in response and instantly feel him push his way into you, letting you adjust for a second before pushing the rest of his length in you.

“Oh my fucking god Jake” you say as you bury your head in the couch cushions, his dick hitting a spot in you that you didn’t even know was there.

“Oh god you’re doing so good baby girl, taking all of my cock.” he says as he begins to pump in and out of you, starting off slow but gradually picking up the pace.

It feels amazing, better than you had imagined. You wanted him to stay in you forever, make you see stars all the time. Within a minute you were contracting around him, nearing your edge.

“Jake I’m almost there, please faster”

“Me too baby, me too” he says as he starts thrusting even faster than before, wrapping his arm around you to toy with your clit.

All it takes is a few more pumps and you can feel him explode inside you, groaning your name loudly and leaning over your back, but still circling your clit with his fingers. It’s enough to bring you to your peak, walls contracting around him, burying your head in your arms. Once you’ve both come down you stay in that position for a minute, before he pulls out of you and collapses on the couch, pulling you into his chest.

“That was way better than I imagined” he breathes out, hand stroking your hair.

“Oh so you’ve thought about this before? That's embarrassing” you say in a sarcastic tone.

“Hey I’m sure you aren’t so innocent yourself” he says smiling down at you.

“We should probably get dressed, I’m sure your brothers and the other goons will be stumbling in anytime now.” you tell him as you get up and search for your clothes.

“You’re probably right. Hey, let's do this again sometime” he says, cheeks going red.

“Hmm...I’ll see if I can fit you into my schedule” you respond, giving him a quick wink.

These next few months surely were going to be an adventure, and you didn’t want to miss a second.

[hesokuri-wars]

Are you guys alright? Like, personally? I'm worried about you :[

✨I can only speak for myself, but I’m alright! Sorry to have just vanished without a word. I honestly didn’t intend to and always hoped I’d get back into the swing of this

Last year I started a new job that is really physically and sometimes emotionally exhausting. I’m very happy there!! But I also have 2 part time jobs on top of that, so I’m just a wee bit burnt out and tired lmao

I've been Chronically Offline for a while, not just here; working 5-7 days a week without weekends or holidays means my free time is quite limited. And yeah, that free time has not included Heso at all, so I really can’t answer any questions about the game from the last year even when I am rarely around :/

So like... when will I come back? Will I come back? Big shrug. I do love the game and this community, I just don’t have the energy for it like I used to. So don't get your hopes up, I guess. Sorry

(And yes, I literally can't figure out how to format my mod icon into this post ✌😎✨)

💙Mod Kara

(Actually, it's great that you don't have a mod icon, because I can't be bothered myself to recover my own batch of icons for this post. This is good.)

Heeey, anon. It's super sweet of you to have sent in this ask, so I thank you for your concern. To answer your question, I'm doing fine, too. Like Mod Kara, I've got a job as well, but unlike her, I'm as online as ever, so what's my excuse?

Well, I haven't exactly touched anything Heso-related in... since the last time I posted actual Heso news, whenever that was. At one point, I sort of just stopped opening up the game and mostly left things up to Mod Kara. Truth be told, it's been a long time since I've actively been interested in Heso for a variety of reasons, ranging from my issues with the game itself, my current dedication to other interests, and the admittedly less-than-ideal way that I perceive this blog that I've owned for the past 5 years.

I'm aware that my explanation isn't as... justified as Mod Kara's. She's not active because she genuinely has too much on her plate at the moment, while I'm not active for reasons that can essentially be boiled down to I Don't Want To. Because of that, I do feel some degree of guilt for not being around for people who follow this blog, so I'm not going to bother defending myself. All I can really say without going full-blown TMI is that there are a handful of different factors that contribute to my lack of motivation, and I simply can't take responsibility for a long-term help blog when I'm like this.

Does that mean I'm quitting, or does that mean I'll be back one day? I'll just repeat what Mod Kara said above: Big shrug. I've learned a long time ago that I'm wildly inconsistent, so I'd feel like I'm lying if I committed to one particular resolution right now. And thus... I guess you could say this is a really belated hiatus announcement?

(inb4 anyone asks if we can just get new mods on board: that would be the obvious solution, but those things have only led to mods being cyberstalked. out of the question.)

~Mod Ichi (I’m sorry if I’m late!) As for me... it’s really been a mixture of things! I’ve made a lot of big steps in my life and I’ve gotten a lot more busy at work now that I’ve taken on more roles. I also recently got married so that’s awesome! (Planning the reception party has been so stressful aaa...) My wife and I are also looking to move into a new place soon, so that has also been taxing.

But to be honest, it’s also because on my end, like Mod Ichi, I’ve also been interested in other things. Between work, my social obligations and my other hobbies, my attention has been pulled in a million different directions. I feel really bad and I’m sorry to all of the folks who still follow the blog and look for news / updates.

But all the same, thank you always to everyone for all of your support. It means a great deal and it’s very sweet of you to check on us. ~ 💚 Mod Choro