#(that ends w a HAPPY LOVING & FULFILLING relationship this time)

[tafrus]

i had my two week situationship, now i need 3 months of yearning, pining, and unrequited love to make me truly feel alive

[i-drop-level-one-loot]

✨2000 FOLLOWER CELEBRATION!!!✨

Kirtch

I want to thank all of you for being such a wonderful community! I've gotten a few really good suggestions on what I should do for my 2K celebration, but the amount of people demanding more to the Human Pet trilogy is o v e r w h e l m i n g, lol so here you go ❤️ Thank you so much for enjoying my stories

CW: Monster fucking, yandere relationship, bittersweet feels

Ten years had passed since (Reader) was abducted from their home planet.

Kirtch smiled joyfully, chest swelling with adoration as his pet woke up from their slumber, stumbling into his office sleepily. Their skin glowed, a result of their carefully formulated diet made for humans, and the healthy layer of squish that had formed around their body was the result of Kirtch's pampering and excess treats. (Reader) was still just as cute as the day he saw them in the marketplace, now happier than ever.

They yawned, rubbing their eyes as they teetered over towards Kirtch, raising their arms to be picked up without speaking. Chuckling, Kirtch lifted them easily into his lap, rubbing their back as (Reader) struggled to wake up. "Good morning, pet. Did you sleep well?"

(Reader) smiled on reflex, leaning into the hard chest they had learned to find comfortable. His rough fingers ran up to their neck as he massaged them, feeling the track mark scar that would never fully fade. It was such a shame, that rounded reminder of darker days, when (Reader) was so unhappy and needed strict training. But that was all in the past. (Reader) had learned to love Kirtch, which meant he could spoil them to his heart's content.

Their body was bigger than before, but Kirtch found that they still nestled perfectly in his arms.

Inside (Reader's) mind, every day was a haze.

Like a dream they couldn't escape.

It took well over a year, having their brains practically liquified with chemicals to lose their grasp on who they were as a person. Memories of their parents melted away, leaving only strange blobs of abstract color that held no distinct shape, along with friends past lovers. (Reader) sometimes dreamt in their native tongue, hearing themselves in the language they spoke for the majority of their life, but in the morning (Reader) was speaking in Kirtch's language, something they had willingly desired to learn. (Reader) learned many tricks since they started living with Kirtch.

In the mirror by their rarely used bed, (Reader's) reflection had become as alien to them as the faces of the crew members on board the ship.

Part of (Reader) wondered if they should be concerned by that fact. But, outside of their time with Kirtch, (Reader) felt apathetic. It wasn't useful to have thoughts that weren't happy.

Dressed in beautiful silks, (Reader) draped their arms around Kirtch's shoulders, placing gentle kisses along his jaw.

At the beginning of their "relationship", Kirtch first viewed sex as a way to release his pet, then he began to crave it as a way to please his pet, wanting to do anything that to make his pet happy.

Now, it was something that was special. It still didn't fulfill Kirtch physically, as nothing could change his bodily functions, but if anyone else were to suggest that they "released" his (Reader) for him, Kirtch would kill them without a second thought. It was a special time for Kirtch, knowing that only he could make his precious (Reader) feel good.

Scaled fingers sunk deep into the fat of (Reader's) thighs as they pressed their lips against his face more roughly. (Reader) felt their lips begin to bruise as they kissed Kirtch's mouth, unfazed by his inhuman anatomy by this point in their relationship.

Yes, this was his pet. No one else was allowed to love them, touch them, like he did. Although he knew that one day (Reader's) life would come to an end, Kirtch knew that the ecstasy he felt by (Reader's) side would last for a hundred years after they were gone. There were no replacements for his (Reader), and honestly he felt no need for any other additions to his life either.

(Reader's) face was cupped in Kirtch's hands as the kisses became more passionate and frantic; (Reader's) hands slipping into his robes to feel his armored chest. Everything about (Reader) was too precious for words.

As his large, jewel like eyes gazed into (Reader's), he sometimes wondered if their lives could have been differently. Through many decades of studying humans Kirtch had learned of many different cultures and their mythologies, and although he knew that none of them were true, he sometimes fantasized about being reborn with (Reader) as humans, living and loving together in each other's arms, without the need for a collar.

His pelvis opened, revealing himself to (Reader), who excitedly removed their hands from his abdomen to caress his exposed member. Kirtch would do anything to protect that smile.

It never failed to fascinate him, the look on (Reader's) face as they slid down onto his dick. The way they scrunched up their nose before relaxing, sighing as Kirtch filled them entirely. (Reader's) body was fascinating. Kirtch could feel pressure whenever their muscles clenched around him; feel the vibrations from the shuddering of their quivering abdominals. Even if he couldn't feel the same stimulation, it was still a magical experience because he was allowed to experience it with his (Reader).

It was difficult, not staring at (Reader) in awe as they used his shoulders as leverage to bounce on his lap, moaning and gasping and biting their lip as they used his body for their pleasure. The strange slime that was his pre-cum creating a loud schlicking noise that echoed throughout Kirtch's sound proof room.

Assisting (Reader) by grabbing their ass cheeks and moving their body, Kirtch smiled as they spasmed, their red sweaty face letting out the sweetest sound of all as they climaxed around his cock. Kirtch allowed himself the release into their still twitching hole, forcing (Reader) to arch their back at the stimulation.

It was another beautiful day, with (Reader) filled with Kirtch's cum, still grinding against his hips and overstimulating themselves for fun, taking advantage of the fact that Kirtch could keep his erection as long as he pleased, even after cumming.

"I love you, pet." Kirtch whispered, placing his cold forehead on (Reader's) feverish one.

"I -I love you too!" (Reader) cried out, chasing another orgasm. Their body fell limp as another climax rolled like a large wave across their body, forcing out Kirtch's fluids which gushed back down over his dick and shelled thighs.

Kirtch was content.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you all so much for loving Kirtch ❤️

And thank you all so so so so much for enjoying my writing enough to follow me!!!

We reached 2K followers while I was sleeping, and I am just floored.

Since this is a special, I have a little announcement..

I am planning a part 4 🎉

It's going to be extremely long, and won't come out until after kinktober finishes, but I've already begun the planning phase for the story ❤️

So, some other little facts about Kirtch!

I often read my stories out loud under my breath while writing, and for names I just say whatever feels natural sounding during the introduction for the character. For aliens and monsters without human names I sound out what feels right, then quickly Google it to make sure it isn't a real name lol

I wanted his exoskeleton to look like those big black beetles found in the garden that have a green sheen when the light hits them, except purple instead of green. And I when visualizing him I wanted his eyes to look like crystals, and what's more alien than opals? Many gem stone colors can be recreated with colored contacts, but I've never seen opal colored contacts, because of all the different colors opals have ❤️

Don't judge my art too much, I'm not an artist lol

It was difficult figuring out how a hard shelled creature would emote, but I think I figured it out haha

And bonus, Kirtch's slutty feet

Put those things away!

Again, thank you all so much for being such a wonderful community ❤️

And I hope you continue enjoying my stories in the future!!!!

[angstics]

3.3k words summarizing queliot if you've never seen the magicians. or if youve seen it and you want to indulge in my insane criticisms. lord touch his mind

okay so the magicians was a tv show about a bunch of post grads learning magic in magic university then discovering that the fantasy world from a kids book series was actually real and the Beast of that world was out to get them. WHO GIVES A FUCK. the crazy people were focused on the relationship btwn main character quentin coldwater (depressed, heart on his sleeve, surprise sex maniac who is new to magic and loves those books) and gay best friend eliot waugh (substance addicted (big surprise!!), gay trauma, named after evelyn waugh oh you know…) they form a friendship and it’s weirdly touchy and close. eliot keeps trying to seduce quentin but it’s never serious. i dont even think quentin notices. anyone remember the “lets not talk” scene? he was about to fuck that sad man. anyway this tension was actually fulfilled by the end of the 1st season with a drunk threesome including the two and their best friend margo. they at least kiss and cuddle and MAYBE sucked dick if the ghost of his girlfriend who haunts him later is to be believed (which i do #cockinhismouthsunday).

at this time articles that were like “THIS SIFI SERIES IS PROUDLY BISEXUAL” were coming out which. lol. lmfao! quentin never had any sort of queer identity. not even a hint of it. the homophobia of the show started with the regurgitation of the “sad drunk lonely sex-crazed” gay man trope with eliot, then the “everyone is fluid but no one actually has same sex attraction” trope, THEN by sidelining and killing off almost every gay or trans character, THEN THE QUENTIN THING. and the quentin thing turned people insane. let’s see why.

so after the threesome, eliot and quentin continue having a good friendship. there is some tension that isnt present with margo which sure is a choice… but it is resolved by a heartfelt crowning ceremony nd hug. oh theyre kings of the magic land now btw. eliot and q are pretty much separate from this point on xcept for certain episodes/moments. it is strange they dont have any storylines together. but love finds a way. at some point a version of eliot sacrifies himself for quentin. if u look at the scene it is on instinct it is crazy. then they reunite at the end of s2 but it’s all business really. the show was really involved w its nonsense plot.

anyway season 3. hahaha. so like i said theyre separate most of the show past s1. this is true in this season xcept for episodes 305 and 313 (with some notable moments in between). the plot of this season is that they have to go on quests to collect keys. the creature that gives eliot this plot calls quentin his “brother of the heart”. ok! when they see each other for the first time in a while in 304, they hug in a very sweet way :) look at this photo from bts during that scene :) i have it framed

after a series of other quests, 305 turns out to be the Eliot and Quentin quest! finally a story with the two! the quest is for the “time key”, which is fabled to be given to whoever solves the mosaic puzzle in fillory (magic world). the puzzle? they have to arrange 100s of tiles in a way that depicts “the beauty of all life”. quentin is very excited about it. eliot is happy to hear him infodump. they eventually get pushed into fillory to solve the mosaic. turns out they were also sent DECADES in the past. there might have been a way out but they were dead-set on solving the mosaic and getting their key. so they get to work. they live in a cottage attached to the mosaic and they spend hours, days, months on it. just the two of them and the mosaic. this episode is called “a life in a day” which is so perfect you wonder why the writing couldnt be that good within the show.

at the 1 year anniversary, quentin kisses eliot. and eliot kisses him back. and you wonder woah what does this mean?! well keep wondering girl because this tv show does not care to explore any of that. it chugs on and eliot and q fight about “living their lives there” and quentin gets a Wife and has a child with her and then she DIES (leaving her as a narrative incubator rather than an actual character, which is very in line with the sexism of the show). and they grow up and decades pass and the child grows old enough to leave and it seems eliot co-parented him but (again) the tv show doesnt care to show you that. and this whole time theyre working on the mosaic. years and years. eventually they grow old. it’s just the two of them. until eliot dies. quentin goes to bury him in the mosaic plot and he finds a special little tile. he places it in the mosaic. he gets the key. the puzzle is solved. “the beauty of all life”. but quentin is alone. his life companion is gone. and that’s the last we see of him.

we go back in time til before they enter fillory. their friend stops them and she has the key through time shenanigans and they never live that timeline. UNTIL!!!!! they do. they remember it all. what does decades (50 yrs btw) of living happily together mean for them?!? FUCK ALL APPARENTLY!!!! because the next episode (306 if yr keep track) they mention it ONCE AND NEVER AGAIN. and there is so much beneath the surface with the looks and the line that mentions it (“go be life partners with someone else” eliot says jokingly in a manner that shouldve been the catalyst to quentin’s magic-induced suicide spiral later that episode).

ok quentin does mention it once more to his dying dad. but nothing about his Male Life Partner Of Fifty Years. Nothing. they dont even talk about it with their best friends, leading one to believe they just kept it a secret . which. okay.

okay. so theyre apart til the last episode of the season. and quentin decides to sacrifice himself by locking himself in a cage with a monster for all of eternity. he says the quest prepared him for it which is yikesss. eliot refuses. but quentin insists. they travel to the prison (he gets back together with his gf during this trip btw they had been apart that season after some shit. one of their worst writing decisions i hate this stupid ass cockroach relationship). quentin almost exchanges himself. then eliot shoots the monster. dooming them all.

so the monster doesnt die. instead he possesses eliot. and that becomes the story for season 4. at first quentin and co think eliot is dead. and it’s devastating lol. an interesting thing is that the monster was so. touchy with quentin. unbearably so. it’s such a perverse reflection of eliot’s touch. which is sorta pointed out by quentin in this quote (paraphrase) “i know it’s not eliot. but he has his face and his eyes…”

anyhow 405. hahahahahaha. so this episode it’s revealed eliot is alive but trapped in his own head. and to get out for a moment and tell his friends he’s alive, he needs to confront his most terrible most shameful memory. the whole episode is him trying to figure out what it is. meanwhile, quentin and co are setting up a plan to kill the monster. and quentin breaks up with his gf (lol). in a deleted scene that WAS shown in promo they argue about the monster. and quentin says “im team eliot”. lol

anyhow, eliot’s hit a dead end. he cant figure the worst thing that’s happened in his life. then his memory of quentin (theyve been hangin out) says he’ll “sacrifice” himself if he had to. eliot smiles and says “i know youre just a memory… but youre a very generous one.” and quentin says— (im reciting this from memory btw all of this has been from 4 years of NON STOP thinking about it) quentin says “well you sacrifice for the people you love” and he gives eliot a VERY pointed look. and then it dawns on eliot. and the guilt is instantly palpable.

hahahahha. hahaha. hahahahahaha. okay so eliot goes to the memory he knows is the worst thing he’s ever done. his most traumatic memory, after a lifetime of violent homophobia and bad choices. the person possessed before him described this memory as being “the day he left home”.

the memory? the day they remembered their past lives. did it happen? fifty years. it happened.

theyre sat under a wedding arch (that was the b plot of the episode lol). it’s beautiful. eliot watches the memory play out, standing in front of the seated figures. the guilt. the guilt.

outside, the tension is building. the plan to kill the monster is in motion. quentin has to coax him to a certain spot. he has to look at him as he kills his best friend.

eliot doesnt know this but he gets anxious watching it play out. there is a certainty that this is it. the first time viewer has no idea whats going on. we never saw the direct aftermath of them remembering. we always assumed there wasnt anything.

well a year after 305 aired, a yr after thinking THAT WAS IT, they recontextualize Everything.

it is worth saying here that in the promo interviews leading up to season 4, quentin’s and eliot’s actors were sussing it UP. quentin’s at some point talks on q’s queerness, saying it was the one aspect of his life he didnt feel anxious about.

well

what happens is that quentin asks eliot for a relationship. remember how it was quentin who first kissed eliot? it happens again. heart on his fucking sleeve. i can recite this scene pretty well so im going to fucking do it:

did it happen? fifty years. it happened. it was sort of beautiful. it really was. i know this is gonna sound dumb but … us. i mean we work. we know it cause we lived it. who gets that proof of concept? (eliot smiles uneasily) we just got injected with fifty years of memories so i get that youre not thinking clearly. no im just saying… what if we gave it a shot, would that be so crazy? (eliot looks down, worried and thoughtful. quentin smiles RADIANTLY it is BLINDING) why the fuck not?

editors opinion: quentin is such a beautiful person. to be so truthful about something so scary is unthinkable. especially in context of him being so hopelessly and quietly in love his childhood best friend, and his whirlwind romance with previously mentioned gf, and all the tragedy he endured with these two. but this is someone who loves with his whole heart. what was he supposed to do? contain it?

then eliot hardens.

i know you and you arent… whats the matter? dont be naive it matters. (pause) q i love you but… that isnt me and that definitely isnt you. not when we have a choice. (quentin looks away. he wipes his eye) oh. okay. sorry.

and silence. the real eliot, the eliot who isnt the memory, looks on. tired and angry, he speaks to himself:

what the hell is wrong with you? what the hell are you doing? someone Good and True… Loves you. yeah it was a little crazy but you knew. you knew this truly mattered. and you just SNUFFED IT OUT.

then he looks to the memory of quentin. soft as the clouds:

q. im sorry. i was afraid. and when im afraid i run away.

then he kisses him. and he hits you with the thesis of the episode:

if i ever get out of here q… know that when im braver it cause i learned it from you.

well

thats his most traumatic memory. he is granted passage to consciousness. what is the first thing he sees? quentin. the real quentin.

q? (smiles) q (laughs) it’s me. it’s eliot. ok come on no games. it’s eliot. i said no games. (eliot looks around, worried as all hell) fifty years (he walks towards q) who gets proof of concept like that? what? peaches and plums motherfucker (this is the symbol to their mosaic life) im alive in here. (eyes as wide as saucers, heart in his throat) eliot…

and he ruins their plans of killing the monster. “eliot’s alive.”

then the episodes keep rolling. “eliot eliot eliot. why do you care so much about him?” “because i do.” and “wow i love that plan. except the part where it doesnt save eliot.” quentin gets back with his gf for reasons only the devil knows. but fine ok whatever quentin and eliot will HAVE to talk post-saving. even if the writers ignore it once more they have some kind of relationship. and they do save eliot in the finale! you know who they dont save? lmfao

quentin dies. in a manner that many including myself found weird and unsatisfactory and suicidal. and he never gets to know how eliot feels. never. he’s just gone. their story means nothing 💯

editors note: this ending broke me. i was using the show as a depression crutch, so a fate so hopeless ruined me. cant blame the show for my mistake but being so technically bad certainly didnt help.

well when the show came back for its next (and final lol) season, they did attempt closure for eliot and quentin. for some reason this was all contained in 3 episodes, most of it in the third (503) but what the fuck ever. it has its moments.

the episode is basically about eliot and alice (q’s gf i dont think ive mentioned her name. sorry alice) going on a mini quest up a treacherous mountain for grievers to return a piece of quentin’s soul back to the underworld. their fights are soooo funny. toxic lover vs almost-lover.

alice at some point says “well he was MY boyfriend this is MY pilgrimage and you just TAGGED ALONG” and (blood obviously boiling) eliot goes “right, because he meant nothing to me”. and this highlights something so sneakily homophobic about this whole affair. quentin and eliot’s relationship never mattered to the narrative as much as all the other straight relationships, especially quentin and alice’s. like i said, they would separate for entire seasons. you will be happy to know that not 1 episode goes by without quentin and alice conflicting and making up conflicting and etc. i dont understand how quentin and eliot’s relationship wasnt important enough. they were best friends, they kissed multiple times and had sex AT LEAST once if the mosaic subtext isnt considered. and the mosaic… it isnt just that they lived together for 50 yrs and raised a child and were happy, something they couldnt quite grasp in their old lives… they achieved the beauty of all life. that is a monumental achievement that shouldve changed not only their lives, but their stories.

the thing about the confession is that it wasnt planted in s3. talking about 405, the writers said they came up with it while working on that episode. it was essentially a retcon. though its inclusion explains why they didnt talk about it literally, it doesnt excuse the narrative outright ignoring it. it DEFINITELY doesnt account for why it ignored the rest of the SAME SEASON it was ESTABLISHED IN. if this was quentin and alice, they would be talking about it nonstop. and guess the fuck what when they get back together it is *non stop*.

SO. 503. they are on their pilgrimage. tensions build. eliot hallucinates quentin’s voice (it’s a soundbite from the mosaic when eliot dies which is depressing). they meet another traveller who is grieving his long dead boyfriend.

the traveller asks who theyre grieving and alice goes My Boyfriend and eliot looks away and says he knew him as a friend and it’s so sad it makes me want to die. why did they invent new exciting ways for gay people to be ashamed of who they love. i hate this show.

anyway the traveller talks about his boyfriend and how he was a magician who died young and how his dreams were haunted by him. and eliot is listening so intensely you want to jump hale appleman for being so good at this acting thing. alice goes to sleep and leaves the two alone. then they really start talkin:

(the traveller asks) have you ever had love? (eliot smiles small, hesitant) love…? yeah love. (pause) the friend we’re putting to rest. (traveller is delightfully shock) wasnt just a friend.

truly truly truly cant describe to you how much it physically pains me that it took 2 seasons and for one of them to die and a conversation with a stranger to get to this point. why wasnt this always part of the narrative. why does this only matter now after 2 yrs of fans badgering you about why this isnt part of the fucking show despite BEING PART OF THE FUCKING SHOW! it is dead obvious this was never the intent so even with something that should feel right feels wrong because the show never wanted it. it never wanted quentin to be in love with eliot. but it doesnt make sense if he isnt. i hate this show.

the convo continues 🙄:

does she know? oh god no. a torrid secret affair. (eliot looks away) no, nothing like that.

and i wish eliot was given a proper story. i wish i knew what was going on in his head through all of this. i wish i wish.

so it is revealed that quentin and eliot “had love” and that eliot is keeping it a secret (a revelation considering they werent intimate on screen past the 1 yr anniversary, they were only ever referred to as best friends by cast and crew, AND even what they were was obscured in the confession scene. and their feelings didnt matter past 405 fuck this world). this is huge. it should be huge. eliot’s first arc is about how he cant fall in love until he does and gets his heart broken. quentin’s stories are so wrapped up in alice that having another love interest should complicate that entirely. it doesnt.

the climax of the episode is when eliot expresses difficulty of letting go of quentin and alice says “he was your friend” and eliot replies (quick as if not meaning to) “he wasnt just my friend.” and wowww. how cathartic. the first time in the history of the show they talk about it. 5 seasons btw.

and eliot tells her about the mosaic and how “we loved each other for a really really long time.” and how he told him to fuck off and how he died for him and how he was never able to talk to him again. he just died.

and that part is supposed to be cathartic too. it feels cathartic for eliot the character at least. but to me the Viewer. i was sick of how they were trying to appeal to MY thoughts of what he should be feeling. as if trying to placate me. cuz if it was soo important it wouldnt just been solved after this episode. he DGAF about quentin after this. i dont get it. why cant they write a proper story.

well one line that stuck with me and i truly felt was this:

alice: he was pretty in love with you eliot: i wouldnt say that alice: .. i would

and then eliot looks at her the most devastated a man can look.

thats it. that’s quentin and eliot. a heartfelt and final fuck this show. the fic goes crazy esp the 2019 shit.

[roo-bastmoon]

So privacy has been violated OR...

... a smear campaign has begun.

Let's just get this new dating scandal out of the way so we can get back to buying and streaming...

Listen, I don't share unofficial content, but by now everyone in this tag knows there's a video going around that's supposed to be of JK in his apartment with Bam, walking around back-hugging and perhaps kissing a girl. Folks say there's the same couch, same wall panel, and a mood lamp.

I'm side-eyeing this because it's super grainy footage, the windows are different, the wall panel seems to be in different places in the two videos, the guy is shorter than the girl, and he's wearing a mask indoors. Plus, the account that dropped the videos supposedly posted then promptly closed up shop, which seems like they had the intention for deliberate sabotage instead of clout chasing as a sasaeng.

But people say the apartment set up seems really similar and the man has a similar hairstyle to what JK had in the beginning of 2023. So I guess it's Schrodinger's cat at this point.

(Isn't it curious that apartment-related scandals seem to happen on the day new content drops? Hmm... I digress.)

Look... If Jungkook (or Jimin) ends up dating someone else, I'm still going to support them as individuals. I'll be sad of course, because Jikook had AMAZING chemistry and I was really rooting for them to be together forever and all... but, I want them to be happy and fulfilled more than I want them to fit into any fantasy or ideas of my own.

That being said: at this very moment, half of Jimin's insta feed is about Jungkook. Most of Jungkook's lives for 2023 have JK mentioning Jimin, or even being totally focused on Jimin. There's years of super duper sus history between them. Right up to and including yesterday, where Jimin very heavily implied they are sharing Chuseok together.

It feels really weird to me that Jimin would want to tie JK's hair back neatly, call JK baby, beg JK to stay longer at his rehearsal, and joke that he can handle seeing JK naked -- but JK can't come over to shower and visit b/c Jimin says he just isn't that easy... if JK were in a relationship with someone else.

It also feels really weird to me that JK would light up like a super nova any time Jimin commented on his lives, would beg Jimin to hang out, would sing all of Jimin's songs and memorize Jimin's interview content, would travel with Jimin for his debut, then roll around naked in bed grinning and blushing while flirting with Jimin on live... if JK were in a relationship with someone else.

That would make Jungkook kind of a shitty boyfriend and Jimin kind of a shitty friend.

I know Jungkook is cultivating this cool guy/ladies man image right now and that is kinda baffling. I know friends can play-flirt, too... but to do all that on lives, after all their history together, knowing what half of Korea and ARMY thinks? Hm.

That's not "fanservice;" that's really toeing the line of queerbaiting. And it's really hard for me to imagine Jimin or Jungkook doing something like that. Jimin said he hates fake bromance stuff. (I guess anything is possible. It's a new chapter, after all. Maybe it's par for the course in idol-world.)

Hey, maybe Jikook had an amicable break up but are still really close and are fine teasing each other? Maybe they always liked to flirt but never were together? Maybe I've been reading it all wrong this whole time? Or maybe this is a bullshit video?

Whatever the reality is, I'm prepared to acknowledge it. At any time.

I'm not in a cult. I don't have to convince myself of anything. Jikook's behavior had made me think Jikook were in a relationship. If JK is dating someone else now? Okay then. I will just stop posting Jikook content and continue to help OT7 and celebrate my bias with all my heart.

No need for elaborate conspiracy theories or coping histrionics. If JK is in his Loving Women Era, good for him. Go with god, my brother. (Personally, I'd never recover from losing my chance to be with Thee Park Jimin, but that's me!)

But something about this just doesn't quite feel right. I wonder if he'll address it at all, like he did when folks filmed him in his gym or sent food to his home? Because if this is somehow real, it's a HORRIBLE invasion of privacy; home is supposed to be a safe place, and stalkers are scary.

And if it's not real, then someone is going to an AWFUL lot of trouble to overshadow Jungkook's release and upcoming album and that is unhinged. The kind of trouble that reminds me of apartment break-ins and tampered mail.

In any case, like I said: I'm ready to accept whatever the reality is, once the reality becomes clear.

I really love Jungkook. I really love Jimin. I really love BTS. They were there for me at the darkest, lowest point in my life. So whether I was right or wrong about Jikook, it doesn't really matter. In the end, I support them as far as I can.

But also, I sorta think this video may just be bullshit. So let's let them have their privacy, and focus instead on voting for Jimin and buying and streaming for JK instead, hmm? Eventually the truth will come to light.

No matter what happens, let's behave in a way that would make Jimin and Jungkook proud.

Love, Roo

[saintobio]

Hi saint!!! I hope you're doing well. You've been very active these days, and I hope you're still taking time for yourself!!🫶

First thing first...BLACK CANVAS!!😭😭👏

GIRL, YOU BROKE MY HEART. It was actually a very realistic, heartwarming but still heartbreaking ending, but I'm glad sukuna had the chance to prove himself and to feel good with the person he is. It makes me so incredibly happy. It's still a little bitter how he was able to move on and get engaged after just two years, but it's for the best of both him and mc. As regards mc, I can't understand if she's in a relationship with satoru? She seemed to be attracted to sukuna and to have some feelings still, but I don't know 👁👄👁

As for sy, the sneak peak you posted yesterday kinda broke my heart. I feel like both mc and satoru are struggling, and mc, being traumatised and skeptical towards gojo, can't let him explain the situation. I kinda wish she would hear him out🥲

And I wonder what akemi situation actually is👁👄👁 and I also wonder if mc will misunderstand something since, in the sneak peak, she interrupted gojo right when he was about to tell her (supposedly)

I've ranted enough!! Thank you so much for interacting with us Saint!! Sending you love🫶🫶💗

i am doing great, thank you 🥹 i’m working from home for the next 2 weeks so i’ve been having so much free time lately.

also for blank canvas bahaha i was satisfied w the ending :’) but what i wanted to show in sukuna’s engagement is this topic you guys might’ve read somehwere, where the man would usually ask the next woman in his life for marriage when he feels ‘most ready’. so he could be with someone for 10 years and not get married, and then jump onto the next relationship for 2 months and immediately feel like he’s ready to be tied down. that’s kinda how it went for him. but still, he acknowledges that yn was the right person wrong time.

and yes, yn is in a relationship with bc!satoru. but since there was no proper closure between her and sukuna, she was unable to control her feelings around him. by the end of bc, she definitely let go of their past now, and she’s fully ready to commit to satoru.

(gaaaah let me just add bc!sukuna was so fun for me to write abt bc my irl bf is also a biker and i’m his proud backpack lollll he’s also looking to get an r1 soon 🤧 i might just fulfill my bc fantasy there)

now for sy! the reason miscommunication happens between gojo and yn a lot is bcos they’re so scared of being hurt and ‘not chosen’ to the point where they’d just not hear the other person out. i think this specifically points to yn bcos she just has that perception that everything gojo does will always end up hurting her, so she’s just not trying to hear it anymore regardless of what he has to say 😅

anyway, this is probably my longest answer here so i’ll cut it here now. again, thank you sm for reading and supporting my fics <33

[ashisgreedy]

Garreth Weasley x F!MC

"Fulfilling A Fantasy"

Tags: Smut 18+🔞 MDNI | Established relationship | 1st f!anal | Anal prep w fingers/toys/mouth | Anal Penetration | Spanking | Praise | Garreth is a bit obsessed with this fantasy~ | Aged up 21+ | A|N at the end.

WC: 2,745

MC was laying naked on her stomach atop the bed. She had a pillow under her hips that made her ass stick up in the air. 

Garreth was pulling out several toys he’d collected for this very occasion along with a sizeable bottle of lubricant. He lined them up next to her legs and kept rubbing his hand over her backside and thighs. 

MC looks back at her boyfriend. “That’s a lot of plugs…” 

Her nervousness was made clear well before all of this started. Garreth promised to stop anytime for any reason, no questions asked if she wanted him to. 

“Well, I may have gone a bit overboard. Some of them are just for pleasure and not really prepping…” He picked two up and compared them. “This one,” He lifted a tapered egg-shaped plug. “It's more for stretching and… well it is also pleasurable.” He smiled. His cheeks were already pink from his flustered state. “This one,” He lifted the other. It was tapered and longer with three bulges. “This is a bit more for pleasure. I probably won't use all of them.” He raked his hand in his hair, visibly excited. 

He relaxed on one arm next to her legs. He was also already fully naked. 

“Well…” She wiggled her hips a little. Garreth’s gaze shot to her ass region in an instant. She smiled at the effect this was already having on him. “I’m ready when you are.” She finished. 

“We will take it slow.” He reassured her, “We go at your pace, little witch.” 

His lubed finger slid over her slit up to her ass. He rubs in a circular motion. It felt a bit chilly on her skin but warmed very quickly.

“Mm… No one has ever touched me there so.” She lets out a soft laugh. “It’s a bit… interesting.”

“I really like touching you there…” Garreth spoke in a low voice.

He’d brought this up to her more times than she could count during the course of their relationship. It wasn’t that she didn’t want it, it just felt a bit too taboo to her and made her nervous to try something out of the box. But she trusted her boyfriend. Plus, the way his face lit up when she agreed to it made her more happy than she dared to admit. 

He was already obsessed with grabbing her ass and keeping his hand on it when he could get away with it. She knew he was a bit obsessed with her body at this point and very much loved the effect it had on him. 

His finger gently pressed inside her.

“Whew…” she breathed. The lube made it easy for his finger to intrude. 

She jerked her hips when he moved his digit in and out. 

“You’re doing so well, just relax.” He rubbed her thigh comfortingly. “You will get used to the sensation after a bit.” He reassured her. 

She blushes when he starts to play more. He moves his finger all the way in, twisting and pulling out. He dripped more lube onto her ass as he did this, getting her insides nice and coated. 

Garreth was between her legs while her ass was propped up in the air like some kind of art piece on a pedestal. Her legs were spread to accommodate his width and he could see everything from his viewpoint. 

“It’s a bit… humiliating.” She tries to joke but her breath hitches when a second finger presses against her hole. 

“It’s just us. No need to feel embarrassed.” He kissed her inner thigh and slowly adds the second finger. 

His free hand moves up her waist and down to her knee. He caresses her skin, making her feel more comfortable and reassured. 

“Do you have to watch like that?” She laughs breathlessly. 

“Yep.” He sent her a smirk when she looked back at him.  

The intrusion didn’t feel normal for a while. It was nice, just strange. She could feel how relaxed her hole was getting and whimpered when he removed his fingers. 

“Shh, shh,” He was grinning. “I’m just getting a toy now, okay? I’ll put something inside you again, don’t worry.” He pats her thigh reassuringly, teasing her. His delight was obvious that she was enjoying herself too.

She buried her face in the pillow to hide her blush. Was she really starting to crave the sensation? 

A blunt object pressed against her asshole and she tensed. It was covered in lube, feeling a bit cold. 

“Relax, little witch.” He soothed. 

She relaxed and squeaked when he pressed harder. 

Garreth sighed, squeezing her ass cheek with his free hand. “I’ll take it slow. Let me know if you need to stop.”

It took a few minutes of him slowly pushing, but soon she was shuddering as the plug fit snugly all the way in. 

“Gods…” Garreth let go of the toy and let it sit inside her. He grabbed her cheeks and squeezed, spreading them wider, pushing them up, and kneading them. “How does it feel?” 

She looked back and noticed just how hard his cock was slowly getting. 

“Feels fine, it's good. I’m comfortable.” 

He nodded, working hard to fix a smile on his lust-filled face. “I’m going to move it a bit now.” 

She nodded and felt him start to pull on the plug. He pulled just enough to take it out halfway before pushing it back in.

“Woah…” She gasped.

“Good, bad? Need a break?” He stood still. 

“Good! It's fine. It just feels so… interesting. I’m kind of liking it…” She sends him a small smile. 

Garreth’s face lights up as he starts to tug on the plug again. He doesn’t remove it all the way and keeps pulling and pushing it back into her. 

She felt quite stretched at this point and told him so. “I think I'm ready for the next size up..” 

“I was about to say, I think you’re ready for a bigger one.” He agrees and slips the plug out. He sets it off in another pile away from the unused ones and looks at his pile. 

He seems to be thinking for a long moment and MC pipes up. “Everything okay?

Garreth gave her a small smile. “Yeah! I was just thinking. It’s just… you’re doing so well. I was thinking of skipping the medium and going up to a larger one. Would you want to try?” 

“I will try. I feel very ready…” 

Garreth swallows thickly at her words. This was most definitely his biggest fantasy come to life. 

He gets the larger plug, saturates it in extra lube then presses it to her ass.

“We’re going slow, okay? Tell me the second anything hurts and I’ll stop.” He reassures her, touching her leg lovingly. 

“Understood.” She agrees. 

She takes the plug slowly. It stretches her deliciously and she clenches her eyes shut. Okay, now it was starting to feel good.

Garreth is breathless as her hole accepts the larger plug so readily. 

She notices him give his cock a few pumps while her hole stretches much farther than it ever has before. 

She whimpers as the plug gets to the largest part, breathing through the stretching with her hands digging into the bedsheets. 

Garreth bites her thigh, kissing along the skin up to her cheek. He bites her ass cheek and groans when her hole finally sucks in the last bit of the plug.

“Ah… Woah…” 

She feels a light smack to her ass, then another one as Garreth spanks her. He squeezes the flesh and leans in, kissing around the plug. 

She moans at all the sensations, rubbing her chest into the bed. 

His tongue runs all along the rim eagerly. He pulls at the plug and keeps licking and stretching her. 

“Garreth!” She moans breathlessly. Little tremors of pleasure skittling through her body from the epicenter of her backside. 

His tongue slides all around, his saliva lubing the plug even more. 

He pulls the plug out and pushes it back in, over and over while MC mewls and twitches below. 

When she easily takes the toy with no resistance, Garreth removes it and tosses it in the ‘used’ pile.

He spanks her again and grips her cheeks. 

“The next size up is my cock,” He breathes heavily. “Do you want that? Do you want me?” He spanks her ass again and groans. 

“Yes… I want you… Please,” She begs, looking back at him as he adds lube to his cock. 

He strokes himself and lines himself up. He then folds himself over her body, pressing his chest to her back, arms on either side of her face, caging her in. 

“I’m going to stay still, and I want you to push back into me at your own pace, okay? Can you do that for me?” He moves her hair to one side and plants sweet kisses along her shoulder. 

She nods eagerly and pushes her hips back. He adjusts himself so he’s perfectly angled at her asshole then cages her in again. “Slow, little witch.” He teases. 

She goes slow, moving back against the blunt tip of his cock. She feels it stretch her as she presses harder. 

“Mm, that's it. Take your time.” He encourages her.

She does, pressing slowly as moments pass. Finally, the thick head of his cock pops passed the tight ring of her ass and they both gasp. 

“Yes!” She takes a breather. “Oh… The stretch feels so good.” She whimpers. 

“Fuck…” He pants. “Yes… That's my girl.” He praises her, nipping at her shoulder with gentle bites.

Neither of them expected to get this far tonight. The training was supposed to be a build-up over the course of the weekend, but he’d made her feel so relaxed and took his time, her body acclimated very quickly. 

Garreth panted as MC started pressing back again, taking more of him. 

“Take my cock in your ass,” Garreth moaned, losing himself in the moment. He always got chatty when things heated up. “I’ll make you feel so good,” His lips trailed over her shoulder along the back of her neck. 

She trembles as she dares to take in more of him. Her knees quake as she slowly presses back for more. 

She moans louder and Garreth starts breathing heavier. His fists shake as he holds his body weight up so as to not crush her. 

“Take more, take more of me. Go slower if you need to. I won’t move.” He promised, breathing harshly into the back of her hair. 

The sensation of his cock sliding into her felt never-ending. 

“Oh… it feels so deep.” She catches her breath for a moment. 

“I’m not even halfway,” He kisses her neck and ear. “All the toys were short… just to help prepare you for penetration… Is this okay?” 

“Yes, Garreth! Gods….” She allows her body to acclimate for a moment more before pressing back again to take more of his cock inside her. 

His chest presses down on her back and she can see just how much he's stopping himself from thrusting all the way to the hilt.

They both groan the farther he’s in. Finally, fucking, finally his hips press directly against her skin. He was all the way buried inside her. 

“I need a minute,” Garreth drops his head into the crook of her shoulder, breathing deeply. 

“It feels… feels a bit violating.”  She lets out a small breathy laugh. 

Garreth inhales deeply “In a good way?” 

“Oh, yes.” She reassures him with a smile on her lips. 

“I’ve been wanting to “violate” you for a while now.” He lets out a breathy chuckle and so does she. 

She pushes back a bit, trying to encourage him to move.

“Ah, fuck…” He groans. 

“You’re so deep,” She moans, gripping the sheets. “I feel so full.” She adds quietly.

“Say that again, MC. Tell me again,” Garreth pleads, forehead pressing into the back of her head. 

“I feel so full, Garreth. You’re so big…” 

Garreth lets out a burst of air, tickling the skin on her neck. 

“Mm, and I’m going to keep filling you up, nice and deep, over and over again, little witch.” His voice is sinfully low. “Do you want that? Hm? Tell me,” 

“Yes! I want you to keep filling me up,” 

“Oh, gods…” He groans and adjusts his position minutely. “Ready for me to move?” He scrapes his teeth over a sensitive spot on her neck. 

“Yes… start moving a little bit,” She braces herself for the foreign feeling. 

“Let’s see how well you take me,” He whispers in her ear and kisses it before he gently moves. 

“Oh, gods!” She yanks on the blanket. 

He rocks his hips slowly, filling her to the brink before pulling out again. 

“You’re doing so well,” He rocks a bit faster when she doesn’t protest. 

She moans and sucks in breaths. “I’m going to fall apart, fuck…” 

“I’m just getting started,” He uncurls himself from her and sits on his knees between her legs. He lets out a moan at the sight of his cock in her ass and starts thrusting. 

The absence of his body heat makes the air in the room feel cold on her back. She shivers as she whimpers little cries of pleasure. “So full…” 

“Yes,” Garreth drives his cock home, again and again. “Your ass takes my cock so well,” A quiet ‘fuck’ falls from his lips. “I’m going to fill you up even more with my cum, my little witch. Do you want that? Want me to cum deep inside you?” 

“Yes! Oh, Garreth…” She pants as he goes faster, fucking her at his normal stride. 

Garreth’s hands grip her ass. He sits back and spreads her cheeks, watching himself fuck into her. “Ah… MC…” 

“That angle! Yes!” She desperately pleads.

“I never want this to stop,” He huffs as he fucks her at the angle she requested. “You like this angle? Is it pressing against all the right spots?” 

She found her center of gravity again and started pushing back into each of his thrusts. The angle he was hitting her made her feel all kinds of good things inside. 

“It is, Yes! Oh, don’t stop,” They find a matching rhythm and speed up together. 

He spanked one of her ass cheeks and squeezed the other one, gripping and pulling her with each thrust.

“This is better than my fantasy,” He let out a breathless chuckle. 

Her neglected pussy was slick with desire. Garreth reached around and rubbed her little clit. 

She was yelling out ‘yes’ and ‘more’ as he touched her intimately. 

He used his other hand to smack her ass again and then she was falling, flying, shaking under him. Her orgasm hit her like a bus. 

“Gods, that feels good,” Garreth commented on how her walls squeezed his cock as she came. 

As her orgasm ended, she started to squirm and whimper. He removed his finger and went back to chasing his own release. 

His hands dug into her ass, thrusting faster and faster. His knees dug into the bed and each thrust sent her body jolting forward. The pillow below her hips gets pushed and pulled, almost becoming useless. 

“AH!” Garreth moans louder the closer he gets. “I’m close,” He alerts her. 

“I want it!” She mewls into the bed. “Cum inside me, please” She begs him. 

“Fuck…” His hips studders. “Tell me again!” He demands as he huffs air. 

“I want your cum! Please, fill me up!” 

Garreth thrusts into her deep one last time and his cock throbs hard as his eyes clench shut. 

He curls back down on top of her against her back, keeping their bodies locked. His moans fill her ears as his body pulses with pleasure. 

His chest is much warmer now against her back, sticky from sweat, but oh so comforting. His familiar musk fills her nose and her whole body relaxes in his embrace.

“Just gonna…” Garreth kisses her neck lazily. “...stay inside you until I get hard again.” 

She laughed and Garreth cracked a smile. 

“I have a feeling you’re going to want to do this more often.” She spoke quietly between them, resting her cheek on the bed and looking up at him. 

“Oh, you bet,” He chuckled. “If you’re up for it.” 

They relaxed like that, catching their breath and having some pillow talk before Garreth’s body inevitably reset. 

.

.

.

Thanks for reading! ❤️-Ash

AN: I wasn’t sure what to call this. A fic? A HC? A drabble? A babble!? Regular fic writing has been making me feel too intimidated lately to do. I decided to write it like this. The story flowed easily and I really enjoyed it! Not sure if this will be a regular format going forward but I’m just happy I was finally able to write without feeling impending doom. lol

Masterlist in bio

ᵀʰᵉ ᵒⁿˡʸ ᵗʰᶦⁿᵍ ᵒⁿ ᵗʰᵉᵐᵉ ᶠᵒʳ "ᴴᵒᵗ" ᵂᵉᵃˢˡᵉʸ ᵂᵉᵈⁿᵉˢᵈᵃʸ ʷᵃˢ ʰᵒʷ ʰᵒᵗ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᶠᶦᶜ ᵐᵃᵈᵉ ᵐᵉ

[yearningandstillnotlearning]

𝚃𝚘 𝚊 𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚋𝚎𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐.

- B.E.

First request!!! Req by: @bilsluckyheart !! Thank you for your faith in me and i hope i didn’t disappoint <3

A/N: used one of my experiences and altered it some more!! Help!!

C/W: m*n mentioned, comphet implied, death mentioned (?), angst, hurt no comfort, no use of y/n, Billie referred to with her name instead of she once, hope i didn’t miss smt

Summary: You finally get a partner and as you said you didn’t care what they were like! You just wanted to not be alone. Is that what fulfils you? Is that what you expected to happen when you were finally “not alone?” Bet you didn’t expect to lose what you realised way too late was what you truly wanted there with you.

❀。 •*₊❀。 • *₊°。 ❀°· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · ❀。 • *₊°。 ❀° ❀。 •

A man, a man supposedly being your boyfriend but you can’t seem to help that you see him as a best friend more than anything. Sex feels rather like a playtime-pass time than intimacy - what’s supposed to be dates instead is like going out with your dad’s friend instead of your lover - being with him feels more suffocating than it does to be utterly alone.

Sick worried about your sexuality and cravings, controlling to the core. You needn’t have cut her off, did you? You didn’t like her like that, right?

Or was it just you being in denial? Have you thought how obvious it is when others hear how you talk to her, your tone, your blabbering, clinging onto every little detail ever just for the sake of a never-ending conversation. How your eyes light up the entire milky way the moment she looks your way, gives you attention, answers your texts, you you you in her mind you wanted it to be you.

And he saw that as a threat, his very own misery being contagiously inflicted to you, all in plain sight.

So many excuses for how he is- but you cant deny it. You don’t dare deny it, and you know it too.

The car rides you’d wish would lead to her, the friends you’d go out with you wished would include her, the indirect questions of his old friends in a flick of hope to hear about her.

She was never to be talked of again.

He broke up with you, why are you sad? Body shaking with devastation, tears running like real-life waterfalls, screams of a broken heart hope. You had only hoped you like him, you had only hoped you could convince yourself you like men, the way they like you. The closet shut so quick for the sake of being with someone for once, anyone.

It doesn’t take long until you realise you’re better without him, you aren’t miserable yourself, you were forced to be but yourself. The episodes and constant crying is over, your body has no one to reject anymore, so as the months go by, why do you still feel crashed?

Mind replaying the thoughts you had while dating him, how often you’d think of Billie, wish for her upon every shooting star, hoping your words would reach her under the same night sky.

You weren’t in love with her though? Right?

The times she’d laugh at your stupid jokes and you’d only grow warmer, all from inside out. The way she laughed at your idiotic jokes, eyes shut closed and uncontrollable irregular panting laughs, you felt your heart open up and flutter like a lotus. You weren’t breathing anymore - you were blooming.

Or how she would always react to you with a smile, no she wasn’t always happy, but she felt that way whenever you were in the picture.

You knew she wasn’t always happy, especially when you tried to contact her about a month after your breakup, after the breakup of probably the most pathetic relationship ever.

Her hometown being your own isn’t helping, with a new year of studies crawling in and summer days shortening she’s come to visit family and friends and you cant help but imagine every other girl she interacted with was you.

Stolen glances while passing by the street, yours were full head turns, trying to drink up as much of her as you can in that luck-pathed moment, whereas hers almost looked through you. Short and cold, like broken icicles used as daggers.

The eyes that once bent and twinkled with such a welcoming warmth you now find them leaving you breathless. The hands that once opened up like wings, fingers empty of their shiny rings, -something she always did knowing how the sensation makes you cringe unpleasantly- knowing she’s gonna see you, eager to be held by you contentedly, palms facing you with a silent request to hold them — now you see fallen, the only thing about them looking at you being the big shiny intimidating rings peeking from a fist.

The mud is dirty, the water is not the best. All kinds of things found around the pond taking a sip or a dip. But a lotus flower grows again tomorrow even cleaner than before. Why can’t she see it?

You a year ago today is nothing compared to you right now, you know what you are and what you want. So why is she suddenly scared to get wet? Why is every person attracted to the pond but her?

Everyone but the one you want.

The one person to bloom the lotus within you, the one to plant the lotus seed inside you, to keep it from rotting all along. She gave it life and left it with you to die.

Or at least you tell that yourself to feel better, better about the fact that you left her without a word and hoped for the best.

You hadn’t realised just how much time had passed, or that time had passed at all. Now out of your mind and back to your body, looking right at the entrance of a park, you hadn’t moved an inch since you looked back and was met with a killer gaze. The evening sky turning to yet another dark night. Were the nights always this cold?

You lean against the random buildings fence, state of shock unbothered. Your head tilts up as the breeze kisses past your features, thats when you realise your body has betrayed you yet again, wet cold teary cheeks.

Blink,, blink,,, blink… and you shot your eyes up ahead, the stars in the dark blue of the sky dancing along the hue of the endless horizon above and beyond, and for a moment you saw her eyes again, for a moment you saw her staring at you the way she used to. For a final moment before you felt your heart rip itself apart.

...

..

You had no outlet for your love to her, you didn’t have her. What was there to do with a feeling so tender that sucker punches your stomach the moment it sees the owner of it whole? A feeling that fights against your held back words and actions, trying to get out in any way, ends up finding that the only way out, is through.

There was no room for it. If you clung onto it, it would only destroy you.

[mod-kyoko]

phone calls w/ kokichi oma

fandom: danganronpa

tags: drabble(?), fluff, reader is g/n, established relationship

a/n: happy belated birthday, kokichi

♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤

kokichi oma does not like phone calls. or texting, even. he prefers irl interactions. so when you call him he always makes sure to answer with an audible sigh. dramatized, of course. and truthfully, even though you're the only one he can stand calling, it still tanks his social battery.

you, on the other hand, love calling your boyfriend. at the end of a busy day, all you want is to hear his voice, and laugh at his silly antics. it's hard to tell whether his exaggerated moaning and groaning about being on the phone is real, because he has said before he doesn't like talking over the phone.

one time you had a particularly bad day. you spilled your favorite drink all over yourself, dropped your food on the kitchen floor, tripped and fell over. pretty much every tiny bad thing that can happen to a person happened to you that day. though they were little things, every inconvenience piled on top of your heart until it felt like it would collapse. at the end of the day when you'd fulfilled all your responsibilities, and could finally relax, you flopped over on your bed, phone in hand.

it rang three times before your boyfriend answered, and greeted you with the usual "y/nnnn, what do you want?? i was about to go to bedddd.."

any other day and you would disregard his whines, but this time his complaints only weighed heavier on your heart, and it might have well been your breaking point.

"kokichi!" you couldn't help raising your voice as the rage boiled over. "i had a really bad day, and all i wanted was to hear your voice! because..." your voice cracked, and before you knew it tears were spilling down your cheeks. you audibly hiccuped into the phone. "because hearing your voice makes me feel better! that's all i wanted. but if you don't want to talk then i'll go. good night."

you left him no chance to respond, and he was silent during your tirade. after jabbing the end call button, you tossed your phone across your bed and shoved your head into the pillow. the cushion muffled your cries and covered your ears, and because of that you almost couldn't hear the ringing from the other end of your bed.

"ugh, who is it..." hastily wiping your tears, you retrieve your phone, and gawk at the screen. the caller id shows that kokichi is calling you. kokichi, who has never dialed a number in his life, was calling you back. with a sniffle, you answered the call, and waited for him to speak.

"y/n, i'm sorry. i didn't know that phone calls were so important to you. although, if you wanted to hear me talk, you should have just said so. i guess i don't mind gracing you with the opportunity to listen to my perfect, angelic voice."

his apology might have turned egotistical, but you knew he genuinely cared. a chuckle escaped you, and you leaned back into your comfy bed.

"i really do love the sound of your voice, i could listen to it for hours. it's so soothing," you knew this would only inflate his self-image, but you had to let him know. soon enough, your muscles relaxed and you sank into your mattress.

"say less! how about i tell you about my day? i had the best idea for a prank, and actually pulled it off! my victim was keebo. god, he's so dumb i can't believe he fell for it!"

as you listened to him ramble, you felt your eyelids droop. your body was ready to get some sleep, and you figured kokichi wouldn't mind if you fell asleep during the call. he would probably be excited to get off.

"and so i pulled the string, and he chased after the dollar like a dog! what an idiot! apparently robots can't run really fast, so i ran away with the dollar. watching him slouch over in defeat and give up was gold. oh! i got it on video! i'll send it to you."

by the time he finished his story, you had already dozed off.

"y/n?" he called out. "y/n?" he was met with silence again. "oh, you're asleep." he lowered his voice into a whisper. "i guess i'll go to sleep too." those were the last words he said that night, before the both of you were asleep.

the next morning, when you awoke and grabbed your phone to look at the time, you realized that neither of you had ended the call, and were delighted to hear kokichi's low snoring on the other end.

your face heated up at the thought of kokichi left leaving the call going all night just for you, that he was so vulnerable to sleep next to the phone with you. you didn't want it to end, so you put the phone down and closed your eyes, listening to his steady breathing.

all-night phone calls became a frequent occurrence between the two of you after that.

♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡

kokichiiiibffmmnmlsdffmf

-mod kyoko

[austinslounge]

Austin could've gone if he really wanted to. Presley brought his girlfriend, so you know Kaia was offered a plus 1. Especially a boyfriend of over 2 years. (side note, Prelsey's girlfriend and Kaia don't follow each other on Instagram....) But Austin seems to be distancing himself not only from Kaia but from her family as well. I don't think Austin and Kaia are in a good place in their relationship where he attends intimate family weddings. Plus her parents have been making comments about Austin, and this relationship, off and on since January. So I think her parents aren't fans of Austin anymore. They are probably just letting Kaia figure things out on her own. But I can't imagine this relationship lasting much longer.

I feel bad for that fan that bumped into them the other night because she only follows Austin on social media. I don't think she wanted Kaia in the picture but didn't want to seem rude by asking her to not be in it. Maybe she thought it would upset Austin if she asked for his girlfriend not to be in the pic? I doubt Austin would've been mad. But his smile didn't reach his eyes. Even in just a fan picture, he's giving off uncomfortable vibes with Kaia around.

I know it's a coincidence, because it was a fan that bumped into them, but the fact that Austin went 3 weeks without being spotted (other than at a club but no pics) while Kaia was in Paris. As soon as she gets back they magically get spotted out together in NYC. Weird.

Austin could've gone if he really wanted to. Presley brought his girlfriend, so you know Kaia was offered a plus 1. Especially a boyfriend of over 2 years. (side note, Prelsey's girlfriend and Kaia don't follow each other on Instagram....) But Austin seems to be distancing himself not only from Kaia but from her family as well.

This 100%. Men do what they want to do. Remember that ladies!! Like you said, he had full capacity to go if he really wanted to. With that said, I know Austin can get pretty deep in focus when it comes to certain things, and I'm sure this is probably one of those times?

If Kaia isn't happy/accepting of that, then she will have to just find a new man to date lol, because based on what I've seen, that's just how Austin is.

Vanessa was probably used to it (maybe up until the very end) because she had been dating Austin for years. At the same time, it kind of seemed like their lives and families were a lot more integrated with each other too though. I mean, V was in his sister Ashley's wedding for goodness sakes. 👀 Austin brought Vanessa to his sister's wedding. That is pretty huge. Most men aren't bringing you to the wedding of a family member, especially such a close one as a sister, unless they think you're "the one".

Plus her parents have been making comments about Austin, and this relationship, off and on since January.

I'm not sure how much stock I should put into the L&S articles (I'm just not familiar w/their reputation), but what I will say is that it does seem very odd that here we are, already in August, and the last time Austin was photographed with her family was back in early Jan of this year when they were coming back from Cabo. 👀 True, just because there aren't photographs, it doesn't mean that people aren't spending time w/each other, but, think about all the times we saw Austin and her family together last year, and now, compare that with THIS year. 😬

But I can't imagine this relationship lasting much longer.

This relationship is definitely going downhill. Nobody in a happy and thoroughly fulfilled relationship looks like this together. JMHO. He looks like he's slowly pulling away, or just tolerating her at this point. This doesn't look like a man who has found the love of his life imo.

I feel bad for that fan that bumped into them the other night because she only follows Austin on social media. I don't think she wanted Kaia in the picture but didn't want to seem rude by asking her to not be in it. Maybe she thought it would upset Austin if she asked for his girlfriend not to be in the pic?

I got that vibe also lol. 😅

No offense, but Kaia looks like she's 3rd-wheeling in that fan photo. Austin has his full arms around the girl, the girl is leaning into him, and meanwhile, Kaia is standing awkwardly next to the girl and doesn't even know where to put her hands lol 😅 The fan didn't even bother to put her arm around Kaia rotfl. She's like NOPE! lol

[woso-dreamzzz]

hey long anon back (another anon said they agreed w the “long anon” and that actually made me smile) here to apologize again out of courtesy of this long message even if you’ve said not to hehe (sorry for not listening to u)

WHAT THE HELL!!?!1!3?2?32 oh my lord. that ending is such a great way to leeway into what i assume will be the break point between jenni and alexia’s endings. thanks for already breaking my heart… again.

i was just wondering throughout this part if bambi was going to be considered for her own input on this decision. she’s obviously young but she’s ultimately going to be the one most affected by these decisions… but upon reflection i guess it would be hard to conduct that sort of conversation. maybe we can put bambi in an interrogation room and just straight up ask her who she prefers and connect her to a lie detector test (what’s another round of trauma going to do to her at this point? kidding. love u bambi i’m here for u and u only now) but seriously i feel like bambi’s rationale or input on how she’s feeling about either jenni or alexia is sort of needed… idk. maybe it’s just me?

eli telling alexia to think with her head and not her heart is so so real. both jenni and alexia definitely have their own opinions but i still do think jenni’s being more rational about everything—(hear me out alexia agenda) jenni has always wanted bambi and even if she’s expressed jealousy that she was alexia’s and not jenni’s… jenni ultimately has always thought about what was best FOR bambi. the argument that bambi is biologically alexia’s and thus should stay with her isn’t my cup of tea because it isn’t a matter of who claims the child… it’s a matter of who is the better caretaker. jenni’s proven to be just that. she’s had her pitfalls: not immediately realizing the signs of meningitis (even if it DID seem like she clocked symptoms but not what was happening… if that makes sense), inadvertently frightening bambi in the hospital. but what she does is always FOR bambi, and that manifests itself in her mindset and actions.

for alexia things seem unnatural. a lot in terms of bambi was sort of done for alexia and her own feelings/gain. injured i, for example—i sort of got the feeling alexia snapped at eli so she could hold bambi to regulate her feelings, to try and make herself feel better now that she’s lost her chances at playing in the euros. she comments that she’ll be able to spend more time now with bambi but that feels so bitter to me. putting bambi in football even if there were no results and then being disappointed was for herself too—it shows especially in her pride of jaume being a footballer later on. eli’s the one to suggest ballet and then alexia feels proud because bambi’s got alexia’s determination and drive. and it sucks she only truly sees this drive because she never used to spend time at the studio anyway. at the price of bambi’s happiness (to see her mother watching her at something she loves to do) alexia chooses to routinely run errands instead. buying her trains was probably the only thing done FOR bambi to flourish her interests and it makes me so upset bc even after all that i still feel bad for alexia 😭

again jenni is rational and knows her place. bambi is biologically alexia’s, and alexia has the last say. she’s respectful and won’t admit her deeper, darker feelings towards alexia’s now-tainted relationship with bambi. i like that her sole focus is bambi (the fact she’s thought through the ballet studio near her apartment and the fact that her club is good for childcare too has me so soft.) and while alexia’s made THE bad™️ mistake, and she IS trying to make things right… her rationale is to keep bambi for herself. to fulfill the perfect family picture she’s painted in her mind. there are instances where she admits jenni’s probably better (because she is) and so i’m lost again truly trying to imagine what it’d be like in alexia’s ending over jenni’s. would jenni still be present in bambi’s life in alexia’s version? can jenni move back to spain in either outcome? that way (again) bambi’s not uprooted from her entire family in spain and so jenni can ultimately be bambi’s primary caretaker and easily facilitate bambi seeing eli and alba <3

alright idk if i’ve made any sense… sorry if i didn’t 🫣 ps. thank you for treat you better iii <3 codi’s my most favourite person ever tbh. flowers for you and for codi! 💐 what’s your fav flower?

Bambi didn't get any input at all. It was completely out of her hands, mainly because she doesn't fully understand the situation she is in despite it all revolving around her. She doesn't understand the intricacies and just how close she was to having it affect her in a much more severe way. There's a chance that if they ask her then she'll choose whoever is her current favourite. She can't think about the long-term effects of her decision. But she should have gotten some input but Eli's right. Alexia (at the moment) has all the rights to Bambi so if she doesn't want to do something then nobody can force her to.

Jenni has always been in Bambi's corner from the very beginning but she definitely does have her pitfalls and the longer the situation goes on the more jealous and spiteful she gets. She's been caring for Bambi for at least a month now and Bambi's at that age where she mimics what she sees and all Alexia can see in Bambi now is Jenni. The only thing she has to grab onto (proof that Bambi is still her daughter) is that they're biologically related. That and Bambi having Alexia's drive is the only thing Alexia can think of that still gives her a connection to Bambi.

My favourite thing is when you guys pull in the wider context of the previous parts and the little things in the future too. Alexia in Injured is inherently selfish in her parenting style sometimes (it's something she works on in the future though). She is successful in football and she wants the other aspects of her life to be successful too and sometimes she's a bit blinded in her chase for her idea of a perfect family which is slightly what happened with Bambi. She was too busy showing off her perfect new child that she forgot about her other perfect child.

I mentioned it before but being a mother (at least to Bambi at first) didn't come easy to Alexia. She suffered severely from PPD after Bambi's birth and even when she recovered, those feelings (and guilt) were still there implicitly and they definitely come out sometimes when interacting with Bambi. Again, it's something she works on in the future because no matter what Alexia feels that she just can't be a good mother to Bambi sometimes (which is where she admits that Jenni definitely just does it better than her) but on the other hand, she knows she can be a good mother. Alexia wants to be selfish because she knows she can be the mother Bambi deserves but she also knows that she can't be too selfish because Bambi deserves the best chance at life too and that might not be with her.

Jenni would definitely be in some aspects of Bambi's life in Alexia's Version but to a much lesser degree. Her friendship with Alexia in that version never quite heals because she will never get over Alexia not letting her keep Bambi.

At some point in Jenni's Version, they move back to Spain but not immediately. Jenni still has commitments in Mexico and the distance from Spain and Alexia is probably good for Bambi at the moment.

Codi is my underrated fav. Her little badge tap when she lifted the trophy was so sweet. She's such a cutie. Jonas needs to play her more.

My favourites are tulips 💐

[allysah]

i want to list some seward stories here so people can understand a little better why i like this little fucker. here’s what i call “sewardisms”:

so william henry seward was THE light of the ballroom basically. he was ur one stop to have a good conversation with a cigar and drink in hand. and imagine that while knowing he was a fiery little red head standing at 5’6 who’s slender frame was likened to a scarecrow.

his favorite color was yellow and YOU WILL KNOW it. half of his clothes were yellow. his hanker-chiefs were yellow. He loved himself some stupid yellow.

he married frances seward in 1824 and they were the cutest lovebirds ever. they had five kids and fred seward and his wife became the like Defacto secretaries of seward and his lafayette park house bc he was literally never at home with his wife.

continuing w him and frances he once got into a love triangle (square?) with frances and this older senator who saw him as a young man who could fulfill his dreams. his name was albert tracy haller and this is one of his letters to him:

SO seward replies reciprocating it stating that he was happy learning they shared “feelings which I had become half ashamed for their effeminacy to confess I possessed.” but then haller gets like more continually obsessive and angry when seward doesn’t respond as quickly (he’s just like me fr). so he ruined their relationship as haller and thurlow weed (sewards bff and main political advisor) were ALSO beginning to beef over seward. so seward ended up picking weed over the obsessive haller. BUT ITS NOT OVER!!! because while seward is off working haller gets in with frances and tries to get with her and it starts to work… until seward writes a bunch of letters crying and begging her to not leave him because he was scared she didn’t love him anymore. so they both decided to throw haller out and never speak to him again! Power couple!!!

the first night that abraham lincoln and seward met they had to share a bed together where they chatted throughout the night and then finally fell asleep. in a weird coincidence, and the final days they spent together were in seward’s bed as he whispered stories to seward who was currently in excruciating pain because of his shoulder and broken jaw. whenever seward finally fell asleep (something which he dearly needed) lincoln finally left.

i just absolutely adore the relationship between the two. they started off as aquantiances and grew into rivals during the 1860 election. whenever lincoln won seward was PISSED that such a lowly small town lawyer could win but took the secretary of state job anyways. they slowly grew into friends and then by the end of the first year lincoln was spending basically every waking moment with him. they had the same sense of humor and interests, such as theater which seward was his main guest at each performance. they were basically inseparable as he was the closest to lincoln in the cabinet and they had become bffs. they make me so happy, they didn’t care for looks and most of the time you could find them with ruffled hair and misplaced clothing. seward thought the absolute world of lincoln because of how good of a person he was. like i just can’t understate how much seward loved lincoln and saw him for all of his wisdom. i’ve mentioned this before but at this point seward was seeing lincoln more than lincoln’s own wife so she (being mary todd) was angry and jealous of seward (totally understandable) who lincoln spent his nights with instead of her. this jealousy also leached out into other members of the cabinet such as salmon p chase, edwin stanton, and gideon welles who were angry their president spent more time with seward than the actual cabinet. they thought seward had his ear most of the time and was just the acting president. ppl spread those rumors a lot my favorite insult is when george mcclellan called seward a meddling incompetent puppy. it got to the point where seward was gonna resign bc of it until lincoln stepped in and was like No you’re not leaving.

seward came up with adding thanksgiving as a holiday and lincoln was like “hell yeah”

seward got into a carriage accident and dislocated his shoulder and broke his jaw. so for a few weeks he was bed ridden. during this time was the assassination attempts of both him and lincoln. lincoln died while seward’s face was slashed the hell up but he was otherwise still kicking. no one told him that lincoln had passed but when he saw the american flag hanging half mast one morning he knew. while crying he said that if lincoln was alive he would have already come to see him or ask about him but he knew.

after this was some more big hits as his wife died the same year and so did his daughter. he was literally having the WORST year ever and i feel so bad for him.

yeah there’s definitely more but those are the big bits (which i’m probably fucking up some). he’s so campy. i love the little fucker so so much.

[petshopbutch]

the thing that ultimately solved my sexuality crisis was realizing that "not being attracted to someone" is not the same as being completely repulsed by them and that trying to define myself & my identity around what i theoretically hate or am disgusted by was never gonna be a winning strategy. it's much more helpful to think about what i love and am excited by instead.

(for me, personally) sex & intimacy is so rarely about some kind of innate 'attraction' at all, it's often much more about trust and sensation and having fun and sating a hunger. so like, yeah if you asked me if i could have sex with a man and enjoy myself the honest answer is yes. i could probably go on a few dates with a man and have fun, too, because dates are fun! but thinking about dating, courting, servicing, fucking, living with a woman is just so immediately more exciting and fulfilling to think about to the point it makes me a little sad imagining being with a man instead. which tells me all i need to know about my desires lbr. "could you have sex w a man", "would you have sex with a man", and "do you want to have sex with men" are all different questions and realizing that made a lot of things click 4 me

( & this isn't even getting into the complexities of identifying with queer masculinity and having very close relationships with queer men in my life + genderfluidity. but at the end of the day labels exist to communicate the incommunicable so i don't NEED to get into it. im happy the way i am and it took a long time to get here)

[purpleyoonn]

The Line Between Love and War P7

P R E V I E W  C H A P T E R  7

“It is said that the night sky is made up of tiny wishes that humans were never able to fulfill. That the stars only became bright by the fulfillment of those wishes. In your eyes, the stars that shine never seemed real, your childhood wishes dark and dim as you grow. But now, now you understand the twinkle in their eyes as they look down at you.”

Summary: Your experiences told you that soulmates were something you would never have the pleasure of having; something not given to you because of who you are, despite the soulmark that resides on your inner left wrist. During your solo trip to Los Angeles, you find out that you are more than capable, that your soulmates had been waiting for you for a long time, and would not be letting you go anytime soon.

Genre: soulmate au, bts au, idol bts, polyamory relationship, eventual smut

Paring: Idol!BTS x autistic!mc

Status: Ongoing (randomly updated)

Warnings: mental illness, talk of disability, lots of angst, miscommunication, feelings of depression, feelings of isolation, polyamory bts, stalking, dangerous behavior, eventual smut,

masterlist // taglist 

COMING SATURDAY FEBRUARY 18TH: 5PM PST

---------------------------------------------

“Now, I think congratulations are in order. I believe everyone has seen the announcement of you guys finding your final soulmate.” The interviewer gestures to the surrounding people as she spoke.

“Is there anything you can tell us about your final soulmate?” She finally asks the question the boys were waiting for. Namjoon internally sighs as he moves to answer.

“She is the sweetest person. She has a big heart and it feels like we’ve known her forever.” He doesn’t even have to fake the smile or glint in his eyes as he talks about you. Jimin moves forward a little as he leans closer to one of the microphones.

“Y/n is beautiful and we are doing our…best to get to know her better.” He stumbles a bit as he tries to find the right word but he gets a pat on the back from Namjoon, making him feel he did good.

“Well, I’m sure army is extremely happy that your bond is now complete.” Yoongi wants to roll his eyes at the woman’s comment, knowing that her tone was anything but happy.

“We actually have another question that has come in from some comments on our twitter page. The fans want to know if your final mate is an army and who her bias is?” This question has the boys looking at each other, wondering if they should answer or not. Jin decides to take the microphone.

“She is army and her bias is BTS.” The boys all internally applaud their eldest mate for his quick thinking, some even trying not to roll their eyes at his blatant wink at the end.

The woman just laughs, obviously fake as she was hoping to stir up some kind of drama. She tries to ask another question but is told by one of their team that her time was over. She doesn’t even say any goodbye as she walks away from them, her cameraman following.

“Wow.” Jungkook mutters under his breath, Hobi agreeing.

[icouldhyperfixatehim]

last twilight finale time for me and i'm going to jot my thoughts as i go and just post it altogether bc i don't want to fill the tag w nonsense to excess so lets go

4 minutes in and i'm already pissed off. 3 years my entire hole, ugh. where's that meme of a woman putting a toy out of a child's reach? i'm the woman the child is p'aof and the toy is fucking time skips

so glad mork got to fulfil his five minute dream of being part of the exploitative tourism sector decimating hawaii. cool love that for him, it's definitely better than finding healing through love and support or whatever

i hope they had fun with the mork porjai implication bait and switch, because night walked through the door and my only reaction was: well obviously -_-

and here's the man himself! aof why are you doing your stan lee cameo in THIS ep of all eps. you could have photoshopped yourself into the last twilight mountain scene like the teletubbies sun and i'd have been less fucked off w you right now

okay but i'm never too bitter to appreciate a nice little bookshop. this is cute. i hope the shelves have braille indicators or smth. would have been cool to see some practical accessibility considerations - evidence of what day has learned and how he's letting the ladder down for others. also where's his white cane? i thought he was finally using one?

the lighthearted tone of this flirting...i am being gaslit. rubbing sugar in my wounds doesn't feel any better than salt hey

i do love watching porjai get the full princess treatment though, she deserves it

their "adult" conversation over cake has me so weary. don't explain how you want me to interpret this narrative thanks, i'm a big girl with some, nay, muLTipLe brain cells. you can tell me it was all about mork pitying day and day not liking to be pitied, but i don't like being told what to think. it's a disservice to these full, multifaceted characters to turn them into informed-storytelling puppets

porjai is my ep highlight so far for real. namtan, the actress that you are and the beauty that you have in the bridal get up. nightporjai are so dark horse special to me. THIS. THIS is what i wanted for mork! to do the growing and the healing IN SUPPORT AND WITH LOVE TO STAND FIRM FROM AGHHH, not on the arse end of america for no reason at all

ah, the classic romcom airport dash, except i'm mad lmao butWAIT PORJAI DOING A GRIFT FOR LOVE SHE IS THE EP HERO!!!

oh christ. oh christ they're not are they?

no

no they are...oh my god. oh i'm. i've written this whole thing pissy over the relationship thing i didn't even. oh my god. i'm heartbroken.

"the worst page in my novel" i'm. i actually feel a little sick. how horrible. what an absolute reversal. they waited until the last 15 minutes to make my worst fear on seeing the very first trailer come true, they waited until my guard was down

to all my disabled buds out there, wherever you fall on the spectrum of weary to deeply hurt by this narrative decision: your happy ending is in no way reliant on you someday "getting better". you do not have to "get better" to be whole, to be worth loving, to find meaning and joy in your life. you are not incomplete.

this is so busted. i'm so incredibly disappointed by this turn. they cocked this up massively, i need to go make mashed potatoes bye

[saintsenara]

Why riddledore?

why not?

riddledore definitely started out as a crack ship for me, but it’s now something i’ve completely come round to and genuinely believe can be made to work in a way which both feels true to dumbledore and voldemort’s characters and which has something approaching a happy ending...

[you know, by their standards - the fairytale fluff girlies are probably not finding anything to please them here...]

the facetious explanation for why i think this is that neither of them would be so completely obsessed with each other if there wasn’t some sexual tension lurking underneath it.

the serious explanation is that obviously they should be absolutely horrifying together. even before we get into the flaws in their personalities - a shared tendency to lie and manipulate; a shared self-righteousness; dumbledore’s inflexibility, voldemort’s violence; the fact that they both live behind masks which conceal their true motivations and emotions and use these to project their own self-loathing onto other people; and so on - there is the fact that they have a colossal age gap, that their acquaintance was established when voldemort was a child, that their relationship was set at that point by dumbledore spectacularly failing to understand voldemort or offer him the support he needed [instead, dumbledore took one look at a clearly-traumatised orphan, said "lol, he reminds me of gellert", and then did nothing about it], that dumbledore deadnames voldemort constantly as a power-play, and much more besides.

there is virtually no scenario in any timeline in which they could be openly in a relationship unless one of them is concealing their identity. and - and really this seems quite minor in the grand scheme of things - they are obviously constantly trying to destroy each other in increasingly theatrical ways.

but...

dumbledore and voldemort are very, very similar people - even if canon spends much less time interrogating what they have in common than it does on examining voldemort’s similarities with either harry or snape. dumbledore’s description of the young voldemort in half-blood prince as secretive, independent, obsessed with magic, and so on equally applies to him - and the fact that he recognises himself in voldemort is evidently something which triggers his kneejerk dislike of him when they first meet, and which sustains this dislike into voldemort’s adulthood.

voldemort is clearly aware of this - it’s obvious in canon that one of the things he dislikes about dumbledore is that he perceives him to be a hypocrite, who won’t admit that he has the same attitude towards magic, being considered important, and so on as voldemort himself does - but this can be turned on its head, and dumbledore’s recognition of himself in voldemort can become the foundation for a relationship which is sincerely fulfilling.

after all, they’re intellectually compatible - they are probably the only two characters in the entire series who could be described as the other’s intellectual equal - and, while their divergent approaches to intellectual gatekeeping are a point of tension [dumbledore, out of shame over grindelwald, refuses to allow himself to move beyond disciplinary boundaries; voldemort obviously thinks that's complete bullshit], they are not - i think - an insurmountable one. the two of them are definitely ending up in bed the first few times because they’re arguing about the twelve uses of dragons’ blood - and i love that for them - but they are also going to be able to offer each other another person who actually understands what they're on about when it comes to magic, and i don't think we should underestimate just how attractive that can be...

more profoundly, their lives are both shaped by an absolutely cavernous grief - and this drives their views on death, love, duty, and so on, which are nowhere near as divergent as the text believes they are.

the love which dumbledore prioritises throughout the series is love-as-sacrifice, a love which emphasises the nobility of suffering and which is rooted in loss - and it is this, specifically, which voldemort [whose upbringing was, of course, one which gave him nothing to sacrifice and nobody to sacrifice it for, and which made him understandably opposed to his own suffering], rejects.

but, both dumbledore and voldemort are people whose grief makes them potentially receptive to the value of love-as-pleasure. they’re dismissive of this idea in canon - dumbledore because he thinks pleasure is something he doesn’t deserve, since his sexual desire for grindelwald was what caused the sequence of events which led to ariana’s death, voldemort because deriving comfort from other people is something he considers to be a sign of weakness - but they’re both clearly lonelier and more starved for affection than they’d be willing to admit. they can, in their own little ways, give each other an outlet to permit themselves to take pleasure in someone else - undoubtedly by convincing themselves [initially, at least] that they’re only sleeping together in order to have power over the other, and that staying the night for a little cuddle is definitely a real part of that…

[the most interesting riddledore scenario is, of course, what happens when voldemort finds out about grindelwald. and, actually, i don’t think that he’d take this anywhere near as badly as is often assumed. as i’ve said, voldemort’s issue is that he thinks dumbledore’s a hypocrite, and so learning why dumbledore constructed his benign and good public mask would help voldemort make sense of him. he’s not going to be jealous - he thinks he’s cleverer and hotter than everyone, gellert grindelwald included, and, since he's not afraid of hard work and convinced he's always right, he's more than happy to demonstrate to dumbledore why blondes definitely don't have more fun...]

[inevitably-johnlocked]

anything with leathal amounts of ust please!!!

Hey Nonny!

Oh gosh, it's been so long since my last UST/URT list, and I've not a lot of new ones to add that I've personally read, so let's give you what I currently have plus anything tagged with it on my MFL list!

As usual friends, please add yours if you got it!! <3

UST / URT Pt. 2

See also: UST / URT Pt. 1

Evermore by SosoHolmesWatson (G, 2,068 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4,  5-Year-Old Rosie, Love Confessions, Song Fic, Parentlock, Oblivious John, Pining Sherlock, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Disney Songs, Beauty and the Beast) – For the past years, John and Sherlock have lived at Baker Street again, raising Rosie together--as friends and nothing more. Ever since the little girl has watched her first Disney movie, she is obsessed with princesses. When John comes home one day, he finds his friend and his daughter in the middle of a reenactment of her current favourite. Part 1 of Made of Music

fulfilling for other people by missselene (E, 3,957 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Oblivious John, Pining Sherlock, Unhappy Fic, Unrequited Love Confession, Virgin Sherlock) – When Sherlock decides to act on John’s advice regarding romantic entanglements, the results are far from what John expected. Part 1 of fulfilling for other people

Swallow the Night by ArwaMachine (E, 87,873 w., 15 Ch. || TSo3/Stag Night Fix It, TAB/S4 Divergence, Toplock, Mutual Pining, PWP, Drunk / Public Sex, Anal Fingering/Sex, Alcohol-Induced Amnesia, Everyone Knows Except Them, Emotional Love Confession, Demisexual Sherlock, Internalized Homophobia [John], Parentlock with Rosie, First Kiss, Drug Relapse, Infidelity, Texting, Masturbation, Oblivious John, Emotional Love Making, Angst with Happy Ending, Dreams and Nightmares) – “Do you know how long,” John panted, his cheek scraping against the wall, looking back at Sherlock through half-closed eyes, “I’ve wanted this?” Sherlock pressed himself against John’s back, biting at John’s ear. “Not nearly as long as I have,” he whispered.

MARKED FOR LATER

2 Bits by Ewebie (M, 717 w., 1 Ch. || TABlock/Victorianlock || Shaving Each Other, UST/URT) – It was the quiet moments. The peace behind closed doors and drawn curtains. At the end of a case. At the end of a long day. At the end of their ropes, but away from society’s prying eyes. That was the foundation upon which the rumors were spread. Part 11 of the Tumblr Shorts series

Nothing Happened in Belarus by DiscordantWords (M, 6,589 w., 2 Ch. || Time Travel || S1 / S4 Compliant, Drug Use, Mutual Pining, Bittersweet, Unresolved) – Six years, give or take. And one night where nothing happened.

Watch What They Photograph Series by Itsallfine (E, 8,014 w. across 3 stories || Sexting / Texting, Bars and Pubs, Pre-Slash, Oblivious John, Voyeurism, UST/URT, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Masturbation, Anal) – “If you want to learn what someone fears losing, watch what they photograph.” — Unknown

I meant to say always by OnceSherlock (T, 8,808 w., 1 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Parentlock, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Unresolved Romantic Tension, POV John, Protective Parents) – Rosie made sure that Sherlock was listening before whispering into John’s ear. “I wished for you and Papa to be married.”

Wanting Everything by jadztone (T, 10,931 w. 1 Ch., || Post-S4, Miscommunications, Pining John, Pregnancy, UST / RST, First Kiss, Parentlock, Mollcroft) – John and Rosie are living in Baker Street again, after the events of TFP. John is trying to work up the courage to tell Sherlock how he feels. When he finds out Molly is pregnant, he fears that he is too late.

Fight or Flight by saintscully (M, 10,941 w., 10 Ch. || T6T Fix It, Missing Scenes, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Mutual Pining, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Self-Doubt, Pre-Slash) – Mary Watson drugs Sherlock Holmes and runs away from her husband and daughter. Claiming to flee in order to protect them, she leaves behind a fragile marriage and a fractured relationship with the consulting detective. This is the story of John and Sherlock during Mary’s months away from London. Part 1 of the The Fight or Flight Universe series

Inevitable Conclusions by apliddell (T, 12,103 w., 6 Ch. || TEH Fix It / Post TRF, UST/RST, Ginger Sherlock, Domestics, POV First Person Sherlock) –  The timing isn't perfect. I know that. Part 1 of An Extraordinary Genius for Minutiae

The City of Dreams by bittergreens (E, 12,908 w., 1 Ch. || Established Relationship, UST/RST, Oral/Anal, Hotel Sex, Opera, Case Fic, Toplock, Hand & Finger Kink, Dirty Talk, Possessive Sherlock, Champagne, Drinking, Post-Case Sex) – In which John and Sherlock go to the opera, apprehend a criminal, and then return to their hotel room to have jubilant, endorphin-fueled, post-case sex. Part 1 of the The City of Dreams series 

John Comes to Sussex by iriswallpaper (T, 13,468 w., 9 Ch. || Post S3, Victor/Sherlock, Mutual Pining, UST/URT, Sherlock-Centric, Love Declarations, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Grief/Mourning, Eventual Johnlock, Terminal Illness, Domestics, Retirement) – Sherlock and John both had two great loves of their lives. They had waited more than half their lifetime for each other. They’d both married and had good lives and now as widowers the time for their relationship had finally come. A story of happiness, loss, rediscovered love, contentment, retirement together, family, friendship and late-life love. Un-betaed. I know there are verb tense irregularities but the Internet said that's OK for flashback scenes. All errors are mine and mine alone. It made me ridiculously happy to write this fic. I hope it makes you happy to read it - if it does, please leave a comment. Comments make me ridiculously happy, too. Part 1 of Retirement in Sussex

fulfilling for other people Series by missselene (E, 19,140 w. across 4 works || Post S4, Pining Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Oblivious John, Unrequited Love, UST/RST, Bath Sex, Internalized Homophobia, First Kiss/Time, Making Love, Tender Sex, Vocal Sherlock, Caring John, Angst and Fluff) – When Sherlock decides to act on John’s advice regarding romantic entanglements, the results are far from what John expected.

To Reach a Breaking Point by LollipopCop (E, 33,990 w., 12 Ch. || Post-S3, First Kiss/Time, Pining Sherlock, Romance, Frottage, Fluff and Angst, UST/URT, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Kissing, Eventual Happy Ending) – After an adrenaline-filled chase, Sherlock and John can't contain themselves and kiss in an alley. However, John regrets it. Sherlock doesn't know if he should act like it never happened, try to kiss John again, or confront him.

Trenchcoats and Capes by jomochi (T, 35,275 w., 3 Ch. || Superhero AU || UST/URT, Mutually Unrequited, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Love Confessions, Secret Identity, Hero John) – He’s twirling a strand of hair around the finger of his other hand. His coat, which honestly looks more like a cape than anything, is spread out beneath him. His chest rises and falls slowly with calm breaths, the tight black material of his suit stretching to accommodate the movement. John has seen many pictures of him but not one did him any justice. The sight before John is breath-taking. It isn’t right. Evil shouldn’t look this good.

To Poisons and Their Antidotes by thegirlinthedeathfrisbee (M, 66,648 w., 12 Ch. || Unilock AU || Deductions, Coffee, Dinners, Dates, Drug Use, UST / RST, Romance, Humour, One-Liners, Drama, Angst, ASiP, Oral/Anal, Hand Jobs) – Every poison has their antidote. Sherlock will meet the antidote to his poison in the most unlikely of ways. 

Roommates are for little people by alexxphoenix42 (E, 69,042 w., 14 Ch. || Teen/Unilock || Forced to Share a Bed, Pining, Hurt/Comfort, Fake Relationship, Sherlock is a Prick, Drinking, Inadvertent Drug Use, Family Wedding, Footballer John / Ballet Dancer Sherlock, Frottage, Slow Burn, Mild Dub Con, Cuddling While Sleeping, Slight Homophobia, Posh Boy, Dirty Dancing, Endearments, Nosy FAmily, Bathing Together, Mild Angst, UST/RST, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff) – John was looking forward to seeing his friends back at uni, but a new year brings new complications, not the least of which is a dorm room with only one bed, and a stroppy roommate with an utterly spectacular arse. God, John doesn't need the headache.

Sacré Coeur by Mamaorion (M, 95,235 w., 27 Ch. || S4 Fix It Rewrite, First Kiss, UST / RST, Eventual Happy Ending, Coming Out, Holmes Family, Marriage Proposal, Husbands, Healing, Evil Mary, Beekeeping, Caretaker Sherlock, Mind Palace, Alzheimer’s Disease, Protective / Big Brother Mycroft, TD-12) – In this s4 fixit, John must piece together the gaps in his altered memory if he and Sherlock are to face the terror that has plagued Sherlock since childhood. As they untangle the web, seven years of hidden love ignite.

To the Sticking Place by blueink3 (E, 121,973 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Musical Theatre AU || Showmance, Friends to Lovers, Bickering, UST / RST, Fluff, Virgin Sherlock, BAMF John, New York City / Broadway) – Renowned Shakespearean actor Sherlock Holmes has finally burned all of his bridges in the theatre industry save for his constant director, Greg Lestrade. John Watson has made a name for himself in the musical theatre circuit, but age and injury are working against him. Can they reinvent themselves for an all-male Macbeth without killing one another? Part 1 of the Screw Your Courage series

Thirst by bittergreens (E, 122,257 w., 18 Ch. || Post TGG, POV John, Angst, Pining John, UST/RST, Masturbation, PTSD, Sexual Fantasy, First Kiss/Time, Nightmares, Frottage, Friends to Lovers, BAMF John, Mildly Dub Con, Hurt/Comfort, Oral Sex, Rain Sex, Voice Kink/Porn, Loud Sex, Rimming, Fingering, Dirty Talk, Case Fic, Baths / Bath Sex, Mild Gore, Psychological Torture, Fluff, Slow Burn) – When John realizes he has feelings for Sherlock and decides he must keep those feelings secret at all costs, the resulting tension might bring Baker Street to the ground.

Drift Compatible by J_Baillier (E, 130,380 w., 26 Ch. || Pacific Rim Fusion || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Alternate First Meeting, Angst, Family Drama, Accidental Telepathic Voyeurism, Martial Arts, Sci-Fi, Internalised Homophobia, Rubbish Siblings, Army Doctor John, Medical H/C, Bullying, Neurodiversity, PTSD, Drug Use, Depression, Mourning, Adventure, Hurt/Comfort, UST/URT) – A washed out war hero struggling with his past. A prodigy who wants nothing to do with his family legacy. Both are looking for something—and someone—worth fighting for in a world where human civilisation is constantly under threat.

The Men Who Talked Between the Words by Odamaki (E, 463,024 w., 30 Ch. || Parentlock, UST/URT, Pining Sherlock, Grieving John, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Past Abuse, Slow Burn/Build, Case Fic, First Kiss / Time, Implied/Referenced Suicide & Drug Use, Slow Burn, Sherlock Whump, Panic Attacks) – John expected to be a father some day; he expected to have the house, and the wife and the nice suburban job. Sherlock never expected to have children, in part because he never expected to make it past 30. As it turns out, you don't get a choice. Crammed into Baker Street with a baby, John struggles with single-parenthood and his own fears, while Sherlock treads the fine line between doing too little and saying too much. 

WORKS IN PROGRESS

Everyone Who Knows Us by fraxinusanomala (E, 1,920+ w., 2/? Ch. || WiP || Young Royals / Royalty AU || First Kiss, Mutual Pining, Idiots in Love, Aristocrat Sherlock, High School, UST / RST, Romance) – When Swedish prince Sherlock is sent to an elite boarding school after an embarrassing public incident, he is sure he’s going to be absolutely miserable. That is, of course, until he lays eyes on local scholarship student John Watson.

The Case of the Dancing Cameras by Kr_Nl (E, 54,091+ w., 10/11 Ch. || WiP || Post S4, Dancing Men Adaptation, Case Fic, Angst, Slow Burn, Massage, UST/URT, Homoerotic Literature, Angst, Slow Burn, Fake Relationship, Scars, Humping, Masturbation, Flirting, Almost Kiss, Pining Sherlock) – The case in which John gets to be a massage therapist for a case and Sherlock gets to be massaged against his will (not really). Taking liberties with The Adventure of the Dancing Men of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Or the case in which John discovers Sherlock turns himself on with homoerotic literature.

Since First I Saw Your Face by Stavia_Scott_Grayson (M, 398,966+ w., 19/22 Ch. || WiP || ACD Canon / 1884 Victorian AU || Friends to Lovers, Pining, UST/URT, POV Sherlock, Christmas, Developing Relationship, Turkish Baths, Victorian Attitudes, Sussex Holiday, Cocaine, Holmes’ Childhood, Cold Cases, References to Canon) – During the Great Hiatus, Holmes, studying in Tibet, reflects on his first meeting with Dr John Watson.

Over Fathoms Deep by bittergreens (E, 477,709+ w., 60/? Ch. || WiP || Historical / Regency / Sailing AU || Sailor!John / Aristocrat!Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Virgin Sherlock, Sailing, Bottomlock, UST / RST, Hand/Blow Jobs, Frottage, Masturbation, Happy Ending, Anal) – When the youngest son of the aristocratic Holmes family is shipped off to sea in an attempt to cure him of his poor temper and bad manners, he fully expects to spend a long tedious voyage as miserable as ever. What he does not count on is having his heart stolen by the strapping young crewman, John Watson.