#(you know the thing about adhders with opened tabs?)

[whereistheonepiece]

Currently wishing I could read two books simultaneously.

[touchstoneaf]

Hey. PSA for all y'all ADHDers out there (especially in the US, since I understand it doesn't apply as much elsewhere)!

I just lucked into a Mini a short time ago for an extremely low price, because the person who was selling it could not find anybody to buy it because it was a manual. I haven't driven a manual in about 20 years, and I forgot how much damn fun it is. If you have an ADHD brain, it's honestly one the best activities you could possibly do. If you don't know how to drive a manual, I know it's kind of a hassle and an outlay of a lot of mental energy to learn how to.... but once you get the hang of it, it's one of the best things you'll ever do for your brain.

Not kidding. When I drive an automatic, my brain is always somewhere else. I'm barely paying attention. Not enough of my tabs are open in my brain, and so I start opening new ones to, like, write a story in my head or whatever. When I'm driving a manual there's so much to pay attention to at any given moment--whether to shift up, whether to shift down, balancing the clutch & the gas, as well as paying attention to other driving-related things like other people and such. It's enough to keep every tab in my spazzy skull open and crackling away, it lights up my entire brain like a Christmas tree... and makes me so damn satisfied and happy. It's just so much fun; some of the most FOCUSED fun I've ever had without chemical assistance.

The last time I had a manual, I didn't even know I had this brain thing going on that was so happy to be used like this, i didn't have a comparison because I had only driven manuals... and so I didn't realize why when I started driving automatics I had to have music on, and it was so tempting to mess with my phone, etc. But now I don't have to mess with my phone at all and practically all the time it stays in my pocket with no temptation, because I'm just busy with everything else and it keeps me all lit up. Seriously; try it if you haven't yet, because it's fantastic.

[news4bees]

Things I do to make my ADD/ADHD slightly more manageable.

Full disclosure: everyone is different and non-neurotypical behaviors are not a copy-paste situation. What works for me might put others in the exact opposite head space and that’s okay. I just wanted to share what I’ve learned works for me over the years. I’ve been really struggling with my ADD/ADHD lately and I need to remind myself of the healthy coping mechanisms I’ve developed so I can implement them again.

1. Have a morning routine.

Working from home as a freelance editor / publishing consultant, I have a lot of autonomy over my day. Which is great… if I make the most of it. I learned a long time ago that I am most productive in the morning, so it’s important for me to get myself into the right head space as soon as possible. I set an alarm to get out of bed at 7:00am every day, I try and go on a walk around the neighborhood first thing (weather permitting—we don’t mess around with rain or snow), I eat breakfast (usually including either coffee or tea for caffeine purposes and warmth) and take my supplements, and prep for my day. It sounds super simple, but it’s really all about inertia. A body at rest will want to stay at rest. I’ve had just as many days where everything goes according to plan and I’m able to have a productive day as days where I don’t get out of bed until I have to drag myself to my service job in the afternoon. So having that morning routine and sticking to it can honestly be a night and day difference for me.

2. Make a schedule for my day.

I have a terrible concept of time. I can look at a task, assume it’s going to take several hours, and abandon it before I even begin. Or I can see a gap of time in my day (such as the two hours between lunch and when I have to get ready for work) and be worried it’s too small of a window to accomplish anything so I lie around instead. By creating a schedule, literally an hour-by-hour layout of how I want my day to progress, I have a tactical roadmap for how to achieve my goals. I also make sure I schedule little breaks and time to eat, walk around, shower, etc. into my day so I don’t forget. It doesn’t have to be perfect, and I have to remind myself not to get upset if I end up deviating from the schedule for one thing or another. It’s mainly supposed to help me look at my day in a way that makes more sense to me and how my brain processes time. I fully understand that there are others that might see my hour-by-hour schedule and be completely overwhelmed—that’s fine! Find what works for you.

3. Set attainable little goals.

This one goes hand in hand with making myself a schedule. If I have a giant task I need to complete at a future date, I really struggle with conceptualizing it as something I need to get started on now. I see that future date, feel overwhelmed, try to calm myself down by thinking, “It’s okay, I have time,” and will sit on that task until the last minute when I have to scramble to get it done. It’s procrastination, yes, but it’s also not feeling too overwhelmed to act on something until there is that “go go go!” anxiety-inducing pressure to get it done. So I break it down into smaller pieces and set little goals. A 352 page manuscript I have to create an index for by March? Scary. But indexing one or two chapters a day? Much more doable. This also helps me accomplish non work-related tasks, such as calling the bank or scheduling appointments or canceling a subscription—things I would have trouble accomplishing on my own otherwise because my I have trouble differentiating between “important” and “immediate”. Goals don’t have to be solely task oriented either. Set a goal to reach out to a friend you haven’t connected with in a while; set a goal to meditate for fifteen minutes, or be intentional about doing something you love like reading or art or exercise. Personally, the more things I can check off my “to-do” list the better, so I write out everything I want to try and get done, even if I would have done it regardless.

4. Keep distractions out of reach.

This one is extremely tricky for me since I work exclusively out of my room since I moved back home. I’m always surrounded by distractions, from my phone to my bookshelves to the dozens of internet tabs I constantly have open on my laptop. I have little tricks I know work for me: keeping my phone on the charger in a different room (but close enough that I can still connect to the Bluetooth), leaving the book I’m currently reading and the journal where I write my fiction in my work bag downstairs, blocking YouTube and other distracting sites from my laptop, and making my bed each morning so I’m not tempted to crawl under the covers when I’m feeling burnt out. But knowing these things will help eliminate distractions and actually implementing these techniques are two very different things for me. As I write this, my phone is on the charger next to me, my fiction journal is within easy reach and I have corresponding document opened in another tab, none of my site-brokers are enabled, and my bed is a mess of cozy blankets—all major distractions for me that I’m blatantly ignoring. So what can I do about this? Set a new goal: move my phone and journal out of the room, close unnecessary tabs, re-engage the site blockers, and make my bed. Little things to reset my headspace and get back on track.

5. Have an accountability buddy.

While freelancing gives me a lot of personal freedoms, it also means I function as my own boss. Some people might enjoy such responsibility, but I personally really struggle when I’m not constantly checking in with someone and showing them my progress. An accountability buddy doesn’t need to function like a micro-managing boss, but they should be someone you can go to and say, “Here’s what I set out to do today and here’s what I accomplished.” Currently, I do not have a good accountability buddy (my ex was my accountability buddy when we were together during my last semester at college, but he often criticized me for only working in short sprints and needing to take a lot of breaks, so I’ve been really hesitant to trust another person in that role ever since), but my mom often lets me inform her about my goals and will share some of her’s in turn; my dad and sister on the other hand get uncharacteristically angry when I ask about goals, so I’ve learned to steer clear. Mirroring is also a common strategy for ADD/ADHDers. The visual stimulation of seeing someone else working can often be a bit of a jumpstart to my brain that says, “Okay, it’s time to do things.” In the old days, this meant I would spend hours in the library or at coffee shop doing my homework instead of my apartment because I was surrounded by others with similar tasks. Now, if I find myself needing a mirror I’ll move my operation to the kitchen table so that I’m closer to where my mom works and I can feed off her productive energy, so to speak.

6. Give myself grace.

Whenever I have an unproductive day, my first instinct is to be angry or upset at myself. What kind of person spends the entire day in bed and doesn’t get a single thing done? This would lead me down a self-deprecating path of calling myself useless and a garbage person, which is a big trigger for my depression and I can easily find myself spiraling. ADD/ADHD means my brain functions differently, but at the end of the day my brain still works. It doesn’t mean I’m stupid or lazy, and a bad day doesn’t mean I’m a bad person. My schedule and my list of goals are a template to help me focus, but if something happens that gets me off task, whether intentional or unintentional, I have to remind myself that it is not the end of the world. I have to give myself grace and forgiveness, because things happen.

I’d be really interested to hear what other strategies people have developed to manage their ADD/ADHD, especially in the midst of a pandemic that might have altered the way we approach our days. Keep being awesome!

[daphuu]

Part One! Im sorry its taken me forever to reply!!!! i really am sorry if i made you worry, its just been very hot where i am so its been a little hard to focus on writing a coherent response :D ----- Ive written a few FAHC fics! (about 4 of them) my most recognised one is a raywood fic called 'A Handsome Stranger Called Death' (thats the real long boy). ----- I dont think you've done a fic rec for any of them but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, im also not in the FAHC chat! but it sounds cool! - brie xx

... seeing them on twitter is so lovely, everytime i see them it becomes real UWU hours ----- my book is kinda a mix of funny and ouch! its called 'dumb things to say in a street fight' and its a collection of sentences that range from "you eyes say bedroom but you knife says ER" to "you hit like my dad" and its in a ergodic kinda style (house of leaves but not quite) i love writting because its so fun to put words together and make something heartbreaking and beautiful. | Salem is a bastard boy! but i love him-hes got a grey and white coat (underbelly, nose, and paws white, grey the rest) i adopted him from a pound while looking for my sisters cat (he came home eventually dw!) because i saw him and fell inlove instantly, i named him salem because to me hes magic. Im very glad to hear that Lady is doing better!!! ----- my favourite drink is either super cold water, or straight up sprite! what about you? | yeah im starting uni in feb! ill be studying creative writing with a minor in japanese language! it took me so long to decide as originally i wanted to do astrophysics but took a physics class and decided it wasnt for me and dropped physics the next year for english extension! i learnt so much about literary theory 10/10 very cool and makes you question everything- YOUR SERIES SOUNDS AMAZING!!!! i would read the heck out of that!!!!! | honestly i could see myself getting sucked into that world instantly! writing can be slow going and as a fellow ADHDer i know how it feels when you set up a lot to write but! let each milestone you hit, whether its deciding a characters last name or writing 1000, 100, 50, or even just 5 words, fuel your monolithic desire to weave together words and make something beautiful like an old god pulling meaning from the stars!

___

Hi hiii! I’m glad you’re alive and well, Brie~!

Hoooo boy that fic is a good long one. I’m excited to read it—I’ve added it to my to-read list (lengthy, lengthy) and have it open in one of my tabs haha

Where are you????? It’s been pretty chilly here lately. Good ol’ Texas wishy-washy weather for ya! Also you should totally join the FAHC chat sometime! It’s pretty active tbh between people throwing out random headcanons and fic ideas and just general chatting :3 I love it!!

I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to respond to you. It’s been like a week or seven but I’ve been trying to focus on getting into this coding bootcamp course so I can get the heck out of my current living situation and into something infinitely more preferable. I’ve gotten into the course and now I’m just focusing on finishing the mandatory prework they require every student to finish before the first day of classes ;n; wish me luck ahhhhhhh

“Dumb Things to Say in a Street Fight” sounds like an amazing compilation, are you kidding me omg I would read that so quickly and then go test some of them xD xD sldjfkjlksj jkjk ofc “YOUR EYES SAY BEDROOM BUT YOUR KNIFE SAYS ER” has killed me. I laugh every time I see that in my inbox. thank you omgomg ahhaahahahahahahahahaha (”you hit like my dad” has me like 💀💀)

Salem sounds like a lovely bastard boy. He sounds adorable and if you don’t DM me pictures of Salem soon I might cry 😭😢😂

Lady is doing much better and is back to her usual prickly self. She still doesn’t like me, and unfortunately she has now equated me approaching her for pets or holds to “oh god the bad things are about to happen” so she runs away from me a lot now :( she still cuddles with my dad, though, the little assholes!! (both her and my dad are the assholes in this case btw)

Creative Writing FTW!! Hell yeah! Japanese language will be hella fun, too. I’ve always wanted to learn an Asian language. So far I’m stuck in North American languages for the most part since my goal is to use these languages and I hardly ever encounter Japanese people in my small section of Texas haha

Astrophysics sounds amazing though btw wow wow that would’ve been hella hard but super rad and interesting to learn. Creative writing is much more down my own alley--I hope you like your classes! When do they start? Have they already? You said “February” but idk when in February so

 AHHH I FORGOT THAT I TRIED TO EXPLAIN MY SEVEN SHARDS SERIES TO YOU AHHHH SLSLDJFLJSLKDJFLSFKJSLKDJ; IT WAS PROBABLY SO DISJOINTED AND I’M SO SORRY HAHAHA but i’m glad you like the concept!!

How have you been?

[squirrelproofwriting]

Why Having ADHD Makes You A Better Writer

We all know having ADHD can be less than awesome, but there are some great advantages to having ADHD (or just being generally busy-minded). Need proof? Read on.

Imagination:

ADHD and daydreaming pretty much go hand-in-hand and while that can trip us up when we have to stay focused on taking the trash out or following directions, it’s the perfect thing for creating and percolating story ideas. Being able to slip in and out of our imaginations is a gift that more “sensible” brains may not find as easy. So next time you daydream yourself into locking yourself out of your house (again), go easy on yourself - you’re a natural born writer at work.

Multi-Tasking:

Every time I hear someone describe what it feels like to have ADHD they almost always go with the “too many tabs open” in their mental computer. That is a pretty accurate summation, and while that can slow us down for staying focused on work or school, it’s wonderful for juggling all the necessary layers a story needs to function - though it may not be so easy to keep track of them all.

Hyperfocus:

If you haven’t heard about hyper-focusing, it’s the thing you do when you stay up until 3 am researching the best tent you need for a camping trip you don’t even have planned yet (true story). And even though usually we use this supernatural skill on less than vital things like obscure Star Wars trivia and when we turn this onto research for our stories, it comes in handy. Where other people might groan over having to do research for our story we gleefully dive in. Just be sure to put a cap on your research time, or you’ll burn up writing time for nothing. Innovative:

For most, the path from A to B is a straight line, for us, it’s much less so. As a result, we’ve had to tap our immense well of creativity to come up with how to get there. We’re also naturally wired to think up solutions that most wouldn’t even consider. There have been some studies that indicate ADHD has an evolutionary benefit because we were paying attention to the details others were not and thus we lived on and had babies and so on. Either way, it’s a skill we have that often time gets over-looked. Be proud of your quirky, unique way of thinking and use it to your full advantage.

Resilient:

Re-writes and rejections can feel like failures, but they are apart of the process. Without either you will never grow as a writer. ADHDers are no strangers to mistakes and do-overs but take heart, dear writer, that means you know how to jump back up and get back at it. We may not be completely de-sensitized to the sting, but our resiliency is all the greater making us tenacious writers right from the get-go. Next time you feel down about having a hard time staying on task, or you accidentally put your keys in the freezer, take comfort that it’s because your brain is busy working on your next great project. Good luck and keep writing!

[miharunakashima]

I found this ask game on @adhdcomorbid‘s blog, thought it was very interesting and decided to answer it! 

1. Are you a fast talking hyperactive or a pacing hyperactive? for as long as I can remember ive always had problems with speaking smoothly or quickly; quite the opposite. So id say im a pacing hyperactive.

2. Are you a doodling daydreamer or a window gazing daydreamer? it mostly depends if im alone or with other people because if im alone i tend to gaze and daydream a lot, mostly while listening to music (i cant stand it when theres too much silence), but if im with other people and i have the possibility to doodle ill do it. 

3. Do you like hand stims, foot stims, or mouth stims the most? my number one way of stimming is to jiggle my leg, often to the point my muscles are sore and im unable to stop (the first time it happened i kinda freaked out) but when hyperactivity kiks in i often find myself in need of using my hands, and i always end up playing with the first thing i can lay my hands on without even noticing, so id say hand stims. (i also like to chew on things, mostly my gf’s fingers).

4. Are you a planner person or a phone reminder person? i try my best to plan things (even tho i often need other people to do the planning, expecially when my brain decides that doing more then two tasks is “overwhelming” and “impossible to organize”) but i still have to get better at it, so im totally a phone reminder person. 

5. Do you hyperfocus on productive things or irrelevant things? oh boi if i wish i could hyperfocus on productie things... it happened a couple of times with writing but always when i couldnt do it or i shoulndt because i had other things to do. I always hyperfocus on the most stupid and irrelevant things ever-- 

6. Are you a multitasking ADHDer or an overhwhelmed ADHDer? i swear to the gods, cannot multitask to save my life. and as i sad above, sometimes my brain sees a list of more than two thigs to do, gets overwhelmed and blanks. error 404, brain.exe not found. 

7. 504 or IEP? i have no idea what these means, i’m sorry ;__; 

8. Diagnosed or Self Diagnosed? when i was in elementary school i went to a child psychiatrist and she told my mom that i showed signs that could mean i have adhd, but since i was seeing her for other reasons she didnt went deeper and never actually diagnosed me. later on, roughly at 22/23, i started to connect the dots and the more i read about adhd/the experience of other people with adhd, the more i see myself and recognize things i do or experience. 

9. Are you a 5000 tabs person or blank tab trying to remember why person? its a huge pet peeve of mine when there are too many tabs open, and the order of the ones i have opened is pretty strict, but i do forget what i was going to look up or the general reason i opened another tab.

10. Are you a self-hate when rejected or extreme rage when rejected kind of person? such a self-hater that’s not even funny.

11. Are your family do yoga people, eat clean people, or put down the phone people? im not sure i understand the question, but both my parent dont want me to look at my phone while im eating (my father doesnt even like to have tv on during meals) so defenetly a “put down the phone” kind of people.

12. Which were you called the most in school: lazy or irresponsible? OH BOI. i heard the sentence “has potential but doesnt apply it” so much that when i was 14 it actually lost its meaning. 

13. High stim or Low stim seeker? unfortunately i dont know the defference beetween high and low stims, also because i started to look things up very recently, but im very sensitive to everything thats too loud, to crowed places and everything thats “a lot”? if anyone can give me the definitions of high and low stims id be very happy!

14. Comorbid conditions? I have anxiety and depression (i mean, these are the things i know about, since i dont have the economical means to afford a more in-depth analisy).

15. Which have you been told more often: meds are cheating or meds are street drugs? i have never took medications for any of my mental issues (meh) but i know for a fact my father is very against any of these meds because he thinks that they are “useless” and that “only make companies richer”. 

16. Not social to mask symptoms or overcompensating to mask symptoms? i try my best to avoid social situations, but whenever i cant i try to prepare myself the best i can (by knowing how many people there will be, what will i need to do, ecc) and im lucky enough that my firends understand this. i dont know if i overcompensate, tho; i find it difficult to answer this question.

17. Reading hyperfocus or reading impossible? R E A D I N G  H Y P E R F O C U S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it happened more than id like to admit that i was so focused with what i was reading that i forgot to eat or even to go to the bathroom. (with things i had to read for school, tho, i had problem starting. but i remember sometimes reading chapters i didnt had to read because they were interesting) 

18. Do you parents believe it exists? my mother isnt very well informed on mental health while my father may be more cultured but i have no idea what his opinion may be. 

19. Diagnosed late or early? for a numer of reasons ive never been properly diagnosed, but the first time a psychiatrist noticed something i was 6/7 years old, but i self-diagnosed around 23/24.

20. Ever wonder how much of you is your personality and how much is ADHD? as a general way of thinking, i believe that every person is the combination of a number of things. adhd is a part of me, one way i have of explaining a part of myself. It can be a “big” part or not, but its not the whole thing. I am many things, there are many aspects of my personality, and each one of them is essencial to create that something that is “me”. I wouldnt be the way i am now without adhd and i defenetly  wouldnt see the world the way i do.

[santacoppelia]

ADHD Ask Game

Found this in @the-adhd-society and thought it would be interesting to answer in order to avoid going to bed in time :P

1. Are you a fast talking hyperactive or a pacing hyperactive? Fast talking. Crazy fast. The kind of fast talker that people would bet on just to check if she was the fastest talking person they’ve ever met. If you sit me with another fast talker, we will probably have a great time, and everyone around us will have a great headache.

2. Are you a doodling daydreamer or a window gazing daydreamer? Window gazer. I doodle sometimes, but I love staring nowhere, thinking everything/nothing.

3. Do you like hand stims, foot stims, or mouth stims the most? Mouth stims (I usually chew the insides of my cheeks, and chewed a lot of gum and my pencils when I was little) and hand stims (I’ve used rings since I was 7, for example… and I tend to crack my knuckles a lot, or click my pen). Foot stims are the final indicator that I’m restless or tired.

4. Are you a planner person or a phone reminder person? Crazy Planner Lady, even when my planner is mostly in my phone’s calendar… But “reminders” in the phone do nothing for me, I need alarms and looking at my Calendar in order to know which days and hours are already “taken” is really useful.

5. Do you hyperfocus on productive things or irrelevant things? Usually, on irrelevant things. But I use procrastination as a tool to push my time limits, so stress projects my hyperfocus to productive things!! (the mos tiring mechanism ever… but it works). I also hyperfocus in teaching, so it is a great thing. There is nothing more important than my students and our discussions when we are rambling about things.

6. Are you a multitasking ADHDer or an overhwhelmed ADHDer? The kind of ADHD that tries to multitask so much that overwhelms herself. I’m working on that and self compassion, a lot!

7. 504 or IEP? Don’t understand this, sorry.

8. Diagnosed or Self Diagnosed? “Self” diagnosed. I received the first hint from a doctor, 8 years ago. She was seeing me weekly during a treatment and casually said that it must have been difficult for my mom, raising two ADHD kids… I had the idea there, but started doing serious research on the matter just a couple of years ago and finally accepted that many of my dynamics can be easily explained through this. I’ve also discussed the idea with my actual psychologist, who says she doesn’t get any “ADHD vibe” from me… but she is not specialized in the question :/

9. Are you a 5000 tabs person or blank tab trying to remember why person? 5000 tabs. I can try to open an extra one… If anything distracts me… Poof! 

10. Are you a self-hate when rejected or extreme rage when rejected kind of person? Self-hate. That’s why I have a psychologist, mostly.

11. Are your family do yoga people, eat clean people, or put down the phone people? Put down the phone people, but as I was a pre-smartphone kid, they were “put down that book/stop using that computer/please go to sleep” people. I’m a “do yoga” person :)

12. Which were you called the most in school: lazy or irresponsible? Lazy. I got that a lot! My mom used to sit down with my bro and me the whole afternoon, trying to get us to finish our homework. I could usually stay up until really late finishing everything… I feel that I really should have hated school more, but I was too busy overcompensating :P

13. High stim or Low stim seeker? Low stim seeker. I’m hypersensitive to noise, to some scents (I love perfumes, but they can easily give me headaches), to food textures and clothing textures… If I’m stressed or tired, traveling in public transport can be absolutely draining (I wear earphones a lot because of this). When I was a kid, I usually pretended to be asleep just to zone out.

14. Comorbid conditions? a tendency to depression, anxiety, sensory processing disorders (not serious, but notorious enough to make me “quirky”).

15. Which have you been told more often: meds are cheating or meds are street drugs? Meds are cheating.

16. Not social to mask symptoms or overcompensating to mask symptoms? Overcompensating!! I had a younger brother, with ALL by-the-book signs of ADHD (restless, poor focus in school, class clown, constantly moving, bad emotional control…) so me, being the older sister, had to “provide the good example”… and being a girl, I had to “be a lady”. That’s why many people wouldn’t “read” me as ADHD, or would even think that I’m really “neat” and “organized”. Hello, years of therapy!!!!

17. Reading hyperfocus or reading impossible? Reading hyperfocus!!!! It is my superpower. It was also the main tool my mom got to get a grip on me when I was a child (everything I read is so vivid, so real in my head)… And I used that to mask so many things: overwhelming, overstimulation, boredom… My only frontier are HUGE books. I’ll probably never read “In Search of Lost Time” or “Peace and War”, due to my fear of “hyperfocusing craze”. I’ve had this kind of problem while reading long books —I seem to obsess with them and cannot connect with reality after I pause them in order to go living real life, and I can stop sleeping to finish reading. I’ve had times when reading is impossible, and found some books really hard to start (Julio Cortazar’s “Hopscotch” and Tolkien’s “Lord of The Rings” were books that I had to start 5 or 6 times in order to read them) but usually I read a lot, fast and with deep understanding thanks to hyperfocusing. As a former boss said once: “you’re a monster reading!”

18. Do you parents believe it exists? No. My mom is a psychologist. She specializes in children development (well, in her defense, she practically finished her career and became a full-time housewife). She had two ADHD children, both undiagnosed. I believe that it’s because here in my country ADHD wasn’t a thing 35 years ago, when my brother and me were children. 

19. Diagnosed late or early? I’m 38, so really late.

20. Ever wonder how much of you is your personality and how much is ADHD? This one is fun. As I got a late “diagnostic”, many of the things I saw as character flaws in my personality have become bearable thanks to knowing about ADHD. I’ve come to terms with those sides, because ADHD has forged some sides of my personality that I really value.