#...got distracted with a different Nightshift thing

[thenightshiftstuff]

Help how did Kody become Macaque-coded this was not the intention I promise

[smileysuh]

comfort cuisine

🌙 starring. Johnny Suh x afab!Reader

🔮 preview. You’ve never felt a feral need like this before, but it’s not necessarily the primal type of drive. Instead, it’s a feeling of wanting to be close to this man- who you’ve been next to for so many years, but unable to touch. Except, he’s touching you now, and you want more.

tw/cw. unprotected sex, breast worship/massaging, big dick Johnny, fingering, pussy stretching prep, 'it's finger licking good,' praise, dirty talk, masturbation, multiple reader orgasms, cumming together, creampie, soft sex, longing, fluff, etc… I pet names: (hers) honey.

👹 rating.18+ explicit I wc. 10.8k

🍭 aus. aged up/widower dad!John, best friends to lovers, Chef!John, etc…

☀️ mlist + an. I'm so happy that people loved Line Chef Mark in my fic Real Talk, I received so many messages about giving Head Chef John his own love story, and this is what I came up with in the past four months :) it's a little different from what I normally do, but I wanted to continue with that 'slice of life' theme and venture into a plot line I've never tried before with widower/single dad John :)

Prologue

“I’m so sorry about this,” Johnny’s voice distracts you from the breakfast you’re making, and you turn around from the bacon to look at your friend. “I really wish I didn’t have to keep calling you and asking for favours like this-”

“Johnny,” you shut his rambling up with a pointed expression, “stop, it’s okay.”

“It’s not-”

“John,” you repeat, “seriously, we’re good. Given… the circumstances, I honestly don’t mind.”

The circumstances… neither of you can bring yourselves to say it. You know that if you say it… if you say ‘I don’t mind helping out since the death of your wife’ Johnny will just about break down, and he doesn’t have time to do that, not when he’s got to be at work for seven am, prepping the kitchen and getting ready for the day.

Even by calling this situation a ‘circumstance,’ you can see a half glazed expression overtake Johnny’s face. He’s frozen for a moment, and you take the time to study him.

You think it’s safe to say neither of you expected any of this to happen. 

You’d met him in culinary school- he’d been a young guy, a new dad who’d had a daughter at nineteen, with dreams of opening his own sandwich food truck, ‘like Subway, but gourmet,’ he’d always explained. 

Now, he’s a twenty four year old wreck, doing his best to climb the ladder in the food service industry, mourning the loss of his late wife, struggling to take care of his daughter, his dreams of a food truck long since forgotten in favour of chasing a head chef status to earn him enough of a salary to pay for everything in a one income household-

“Seriously,” your words snap the single dad back from his zone out, “we’re good. I’m making breakfast for Soonbok, I’ve got her lunch packed, I’ll take her to kindergarten, pick her up after- you just have to remember I have a night shift, gotta be at my own restaurant by five at the latest.”

“Five, yeah,” Johnny nods, swallowing thickly and toying with his daughters small pink backpack. “One day, I’ll be higher up on the food chain, and I’ll have better hours- I promise this isn’t a forever thing.”

“It’s an ‘as long as it needs to happen’ thing, okay? Don’t sweat it,” you assure him. “Here,” you take some of the crispy bacon out of the pan, putting it onto a scrambled egg bagel you’d prepared, “you need breakfast too.”

Johnny just about melts looking at the food. “You’re so good to me.”

You offer him a smile. “That’s what friends are for.”

One

Johnny swears his age is catching up to him. It’s not even four oclock and he’s feeling tired, letting out a groan as he says goodbye to the nightshift guys and heads to change out of his head chef attire in the staff bathroom. He’d turned thirty this year, and as he looks at his face in the mirror, he thinks he’s starting to see it.

On his way out of the back door, Johnny bumps into one of his line cooks. Mark Lee is pressed to the wall where people usually lean to smoke, his girlfriend closing him in with her hands on either side of his head. Back when she was expo, everyone used to call her Sunshine, but in her dealings with Mark Lee, Johnny’s come to realize that he’s the angel, not her. 

“Aren’t you two on the clock?” Johnny jokes as he walks past.

Sunshine pulls away from Mark, offering the head chef a grin. “We’re on a vape break.”

“Sure you are,” Johnny laughs, shaking his head.  “See you two back in there, better only be five more minutes.”

“Aren’t you done for the day?” Mark asks, confusion written on his face, along with lipstick marks that he’s hurrying to wipe off.

“Grabbing happy hour with a friend, but be careful Mark Lee, I’m always watching. Just because I’m sitting at the bar doesn’t mean I’m not judging you.”

Johnny can hear Mark mutter something under his breath, and Sunshine is quick to try to calm him down, but as Johnny turns the corner to head to the front entrance of the restaurant, he hears the back door open and close, signaling the end of the little ‘vape break.’

When Johnny joins you at the bar, you’re chatting with Jeno, and the sight makes an unexplainable emotion tingle up his spine. Out of all the front of house staff here, Jeno might just be the biggest manwhore, and he’s had a thing for cougars for a while, although there’s only a handful of years difference between the two of you-

“What are you guys talking about?” John asks, taking a seat on the dark green leather hightop stools surrounding the bar.

“Which virgin drinks are the best,” you respond casually. “I was going to get an iced tea, but Jeno convinced me to try one of your new virgin lemon ginger fizzes.”

“That’s called upselling, honey, you should know that, seeing as you’re in the industry,” Johnny grins.

“Yeah, well, you’re the one who invited me here, so I figured you’d be paying.” You take a sip of your straw, looking at Johnny with a smirk, a playful glint in your eyes. 

“Are we getting food?” Johnny asks. “I might as well take care of that for you too.”

“I’ve got time,” you respond casually. “Don’t work for an hour, lets get our ‘nosh’ on.”

Johnny can only laugh at your antics, turning to Jeno, who’s watching with an amused grin. Everyone here knows you and Johnny are close, you come here often enough to see him, the two of you catching each other for a half an hour here or there between his day shifts and your night commitments. 

Johnny orders three appetizers off the happy hour menu, two things he knows you like, and one that’s more up his alley. “Make sure Yuta isn’t back there slacking off,” Johnny warns Jeno, knowing that two of the items will be coming from the ‘bottom end’ of the expo line, which is where Yuta runs the show after Johnny’s off.

“I’m sure he’ll pull out all the stops for our MVP,” Jeno grins, typing the order into an ipad. “Do you want a beer? We’ve got new rotators.”

“Don’t bother trying to upsell me,” Johnny scoffs. “House Lager, and don’t fuck around with the foam.”

“You run a tight ship here, captain,” you tease, bumping Johnny’s elbow.

“Speaking of-”

“Don’t try to recruit me to work here again,” you’re quick to warn.

“Damn it,” Johnny shakes his head, pretending to be quite upset about your rejection. He does feel it- he does think you’d be a great member of the team, and he’d love to offer you a dual head chef position, but it’s not in his power to do so, and that fact haunts him every day. Working for a company limits what he’s able to do, and sometimes, even at age thirty, Johnny still thinks about his dream to open a food truck, with you by his side. “No, in all seriousness, I wanted to talk to you about Soonie’s birthday.”

“Right, she’s turning eleven soon, that’s quite the milestone,” you grin, playing with your straw.

“I asked Doyoung if I could open early for her birthday, it’s a Sunday, I was thinking some of her friends and their parents could come in for a brunch an hour before we’re open for the public.”

“That’s a great idea!”

“Here’s the catch, Soonie was raised on your breakfast food. As much as I try to make things for her, and I hate to admit this, by the way, she always says your cooking is better. So I was thinking… maybe you’d want to come in that day and help me out with all of this. With your skills, I wouldn’t need Hyuck and Mark, it could be just us, and I’m sure we could make a birthday breakfast Soonbok would never forget. It would be like old times, like back when we were in culinary school.”

He loves the way you’re smiling at him, giving him space to rant. 

When he’s done, you cock your head to the side, only wasting one beat before you say, “I’ll do it.”

“Really? I don’t have to bribe you with money or anything?”

“Jeeze, have I ever asked you for money, John?” You smack at his arm, clearly slightly offended. “I’m doing this for Soonie… and maybe a little for you too.”

“Don’t go soft on me, killer,” Johnny teases. “Everyone around here’s too soft these days.”

“Says the softest dad I know,” you roll your eyes. 

“Shh,” he warns, “don’t say that loud enough for Jeno to hear.”

“As if everyone doesn’t already know.”

The two of you continue to chat and joke, a short while later, the head manager, Doyoung, shows up carrying food. It’s funny for Johnny to see Doyoung balancing two items on one arm, the third in the palm of his hand, but he supposes Doyoung started somewhere too, the same way John had. 

“VIP happy hour appetizers,” Doyoung sighs, setting the food down. 

“As opposed to regular happy hour appetizers?” you grin, immediately reaching for a fry.

“These are special,” Doyoung insists, “pretty sure Yuta spit in them.”

Doyoung is a pretty regal man, he’s not one to joke around- but for some reason, when Doyoung is in your vicinity, he loosens up a little. Everyone loosens up around you, you radiate a safe space kind of energy, the kind of energy that makes Johnny’s tense shoulders relax, his smile softening.

“Then I’ll be sure to eat all of this,” you respond. “Tell Yuta more spit.”

Doyoung shakes his head at you. “I’m sure Johnny’s tried to poach you already, but if you ever want a job, you can have his.”

“Hey!” Johnny laughs.

“I’ll consider it,” you grin.

“And I expect a plate of food for this brunch thing,” Doyoung continues. “I’ve heard nothing beats your breakfasts, even though you work nights.”

“Someone has been talking about me again,” you muse, eyes shifting to John.

“What can I say?” He holds his hands up in defense. “I speak only the truth.”

“Your reputation precedes you,” Doyoung insists. “Anyways, have fun you two, I’ve got food to run, our new expo girl isn’t filling Sunshine’s shoes too well.”

There’s a glint in Doyoung’s eye before he scurries away, and Johnny turns to watch the new expo girl practically short circuiting with take out orders on the line. 

“Poor girl,” you sigh. “It takes a certain kind of person to work in a restaurant.”

And an even more specific type to do what the two of you do as chefs.

Two

You’ve been on a few first dates this year, and this one is definitely a bottom three. You’ve had one drink, and you already feel like finding a way to slip out early. 

Initially, you’d been intrigued by dating a man in finance, but it’s clear now that you’re in two completely different worlds- and to make matters worse, he mostly talks about himself. He’s oozing this obnoxious confidence that makes you grimace every time you sip your drink, and not from the alcohol.

Your date is in the bathroom when Johnny calls.

“Hello?”

“Hey, you!” His voice warms your heart. “So Soonie is at a sleep over tonight, and I was thinking about making a Soonbok style menu for her birthday, all Soonie style names for food and such, planning a menu just for her- are you up to anything? Can I go through it with you?”

“Actually…” your gaze shifts to the bathrooms, “I’m on a date.”

“Oh.”

“It’s going so bad, and planning Soonie’s birthday would be such a better use of my evening. Listen, can you come pick me up? I’ll text you the address, you can come and call me when you’re outside, pretend it’s a family emergency or something-”

“You got it, I’ll be there right away.”

Fifteen minutes later, you’re hopping into Johnny’s car, letting out a deep sigh of relief.

“That bad, huh?” he asks.

“I don’t even want to talk about it right now,” you groan. 

“Here, distract yourself,” Johnny hands you a piece of paper, and you realize it’s a mock up menu for Soonbok’s birthday. “This is just a prototype, I was messing around with styles on some fucking site called Canva-”

“I didn’t know you were good at this sort of thing,” you gasp, taking in the intricate fonts and colouring.

“The site did all the work, trust me,” Johnny scoffs, pulling out into traffic. “Read it over and let me know what you think.”

You begin to scan the menu. There’s Soonie Side Up Eggs, and Boken Avocado Bennies, Soonbok Style Slapjacks and Suh Family Breakfast Sammies. 

“I’m shocked you came up with this many names related to Soonie and Suh,” you say.

“I spent my entire shift thinking about them in the back of my mind while I worked,” Johnny admits. “They’re not cheesy or anything, right?”

“They’re definitely cheesy,” you confirm, “but Soonie is going to love them. You’ve always been cheesy, John, and she adores you for it.”

You notice Johnny’s skin turning a little red, and it’s not just from the reflection of the traffic light illuminating the inside of his car while you wait for it to go green. 

You continue to study the menu, thinking hard the entire way back to Johnny’s house.

He’s got a modest three bedroom townhouse, with his and Soonbok’s rooms on the top floor, and the guest bedroom on the main floor with the kitchen and living room. The kitchen is, without a doubt, the heart of the home, and the two of you make your way there as soon as you’re past the threshold.

“I have some thoughts,” you admit, setting the menu down and pointing at one of the items. “Soonbok toast,” you announce, a twist on french toast, “it says here that it comes with a berry compote. I can tell that this is one of the dishes more geared toward others, because if this was really for Soonie, you’d know that your daughter doesn't even touch berry or apple crisps. She picks at the oat brown sugar on top, but doesn’t like cooked berries or fruits.”

“Yeah…” Johnny leans next to you, scratching the back of his neck. “That was the only one I wasn’t sure on, but for brunch, you have to have a french toast option, right?”

“We can still do french toast, but I think every menu item should be something she’d actually love, don’t you agree?”

“A hundred percent.” 

“What if, instead of berry compote, we do an brown sugar glaze type sauce?”

“That could be doable,” Johnny admits. “Should we try to make one now?”

“Can we do it in the morning?” you ask. “Honestly, I had one drink at the bar, I’m tired after a long shift, and I’m ready to have a few more drinks then pass out.”

“Drinks are a good idea,” Johnny grins, already heading to the fridge. “It will give me more time to think about how to make the brown sugar glaze, and I’ll get on top of that in the morning.”

“Exactly. Chef hours are over, we can just relax,” you insist, heading to collapse on his couch.

“Chef hours are never over,” Johnny reminds you, cracking open a beer and approaching so he can hand it to you.

“It’s one of the reasons dating is so hard in our profession,” you sigh, taking a swig of your drink.

“The hours make it tough,” Johnny nods. 

“So does the mentality,” you remind him. “We just… we think a little differently than others. We’re all a little too committed to our work.”

“That’s not always a bad thing, you’ve just gotta find someone you’re compatible with, someone who will appreciate that about you.” 

“Says one single chef to the other,” you laugh.

Johnny clinks his bottle against your own before taking a large gulp. “Touche.”

Three

Johnny is doing his best to work quietly, aware that the guest bedroom is just a short distance from the kitchen as he whips up eggs for the french toast batter. 

He manages to get all the way through to the cooking before you sleepily putter into the kitchen, adorned in one of his spare shirts for when you sleep over unexpectedly. You look adorable, but Johnny can’t bring himself to focus on you as he perfects the brown sugar glaze, careful not to burn it.

“Almost done,” he calls over his shoulder, “take a seat then try this with me?”

“It smells good,” you tell him, pulling out a chair at the island kitchen counter. 

“Thanks, honey, I was up last night thinking about it- had to wake up early to try it out.” He lifts the french toast onto a plate, dipping a spoon into the glaze to coat the breakfast. “I hope I didn’t wake you up?”

“The smell did,” you muse, grinning as he brings the french toast toward you, setting it down and opening a drawer to retrieve two sets of utensils.

The two of you cut into the toast, and you lift your fork. “Cheers,” you grin, and Johnny touches his food to your own before you both go in for a bite. 

The french toast is cooked to perfection, and although the brown sugar glaze is a little sweet for his liking, Johnny knows Soonie’s sweettooth will appreciate this adjustment to the recipe.

But when Johnny lifts his gaze to you, he sees apprehension in your eyes. “Did you like it?” he enquires.

“It’s really good, don’t get me wrong,” you assure him quickly, “I just think… maybe it’s missing one or two things.”

“Like what?”

“Mmm…” you cock your head to the side, “we both know Soonbok is a fan of nuts, peanut butter is her usual go to but she likes others too- what if we finely chop some pecan or walnut and add that in somehow?”

“That could work,” Johnny nods. 

“Do you mind if I take a crack at it?” you ask. 

Johnny laughs. There are very few people he’ll allow to use his kitchen, and luckily you’re the one at the top. You’ve been cooking here for so many years that he doesn’t have to guide you to anything, you stand up and immediately go in search of details to make your french toast masterpiece come to life, and Johnny happily takes a back seat while he finishes his own creation.

You go for a bag of pecans, dumping a small amount onto a cutting board before you begin to finally chop, leaving an array of different sizes of chunks. Soonie has always been a texture specific child, and Johnny loves how you incorporate all the little quirks of his daughter into your cooking like this.

In a pan with some butter, you begin to toast the nuts, getting prepped on your bread by using the already made batter he’d created earlier. As you put the toast into the pan and check the nuts, you cock your head to the side again, an endearing trait you do when you’re thinking.

“What about oats?” you suggest. 

“Do whatever you think is best,” Johnny encourages you, heading to the fridge to grab some orange juice and a nearly empty bottle of prosecco he’d opened for a recipe two nights ago.

Johnny watches you add oats to the browning pecans while he makes mimosas, and in no time at all, you’re plating the french toast, with a spoonful of the newly toasted additions, and a few spoonfuls of brown sugar glaze.

“There,” you announce, bringing the food to the table. “I added a bit of cinnamon and brown sugar to the buttered nuts and oats while you were making drinks.”

“Cheers,” Johnny grins, lifting a forkful of your creation to gently touch it to your own.

As soon as he bites into it, Johnny knows that this is a winner. The crunch of the nuts, and the oats- the added fats of the butter- the slight taste of cinnamon on the toppings- 

“Wow,” he breathes, leaning back in his chair. “Soonie really wasn’t joking when she said you’re the best breakfast chef in town.”

“Stop it,” you laugh. “You made the glaze! We did this together!”

Johnny goes for a second bite. “This is the stuff that will stick to your ribs,” he muses, not caring that the calorie content was just inflated by the addition of butter and nuts, “Good ol’ comfort food.”

“No, John, you’re a head chef now, this is comfort cuisine,” you correct him with a grin. 

Johnny swears your eyes are sparkling as you smile at him, and it makes his heart skip a beat in his chest. It’s times like these that he realizes just how smitten he is with you. You’ve been there for him, through thick and thin. There’s no way he’d be where he is now without you, and he’s not even sure if you know the full extent of it.

But at the same time, because you’re his rock, Johnny doesn’t want to overstep. He can’t lose you, not now, not ever. Soonie lost her mom to a car crash when she was three, and there’s no way in hell Johnny’s going to do something that could potentially make her lose you too.

Four

“Hey, you,” you grin, finishing pouring your glass of wine while you put your favourite chef on speaker.

“Hey, yourself,” Johnny responds, and you can practically hear the smile in his own voice. “Listen, uh, I need to ask you for a favour.”

“Shoot.”

“Two of my line chefs called in today before dinner- pretty sure they’re both hungover or something. Anyways, I’m staying, and it’s a busier night than projected- Soonie is done Girl Guides at seven, and I know it’s your night off, so if you’re busy I can find someone else, but-”

“I’ve got you,” you interrupt him. “Girls night with my favourite girl is a better plan than I had.”

“Really? You sure?”

“A hundred percent.”

“I’d say I owe you one, but at this point, I probably owe you more like a thousand.”

“And don’t you forget it,” you laugh, pouring your wine back into the bottle. “Take care of work, and I’ll take care of our girl.”

A couple hours later, you’re in Johnny’s familiar kitchen, making spiced popcorn and virgin cocktails. Soonie wants to be a chef, just like her dad, and she’s getting better every day. You love giving her soft instructions and lending a helping hand on bigger jugs of juice that her tiny fingers can’t quite hold.

Soonbok has a love for all things disney and music, and although this is probably the third time you’re watching it with her, the two of you settle in for the live action Ariel.

While Johnny is primarily a chef, back when you were in culinary school, he used to sing to himself when he was working. He was always quiet, but loud enough for you to listen to his beautiful voice. Like her father, Soonbok has a way with music, and you adore watching the eleven year old belt out Ariel songs.

She’s tuckered out from Girl Guides however, and about halfway into the movie she cuddles up next to you, her eyelids beginning to droop.

When Johnny comes home as the film is ending, Soonie is fast asleep, and you quickly motion at him to be quiet as he steps through the door.

Johnny is careful as he sets his keys and bag down, kicking off his shoes and putting away his jacket. He tiptoes toward the two of you. “How long has she been out?” he whispers.

“Half an hour or so,” you respond in a hushed tone. “How was work?”

He lets out a sigh. “Could have been better, but I’m home now. Should I get this little one to bed?”

You nod, watching the way Johnny bends down to gently lift his daughter off the couch. She stirs in his arms. “Daddy?”

“Hi, Soonie,” he beams down at her. “Did you have a good girls night?”

“Can y/n stay longer?”

Johnny’s eyes shift to you, and a smile forms on your lips. “I guess I can’t say no to Soonie, can I?”

“Here’s the deal, Soonie, y/n can stay longer, but I’ve gotta put you to bed. You had a long day, didn’t you, sweet girl?”

“Uh huh.” Soonie yawns, cuddling closer to Johnny’s chest, and the sight makes you melt.

Johnny carries her out of the living room and up to the second level. He takes some time tucking her in, and then he comes back down to join you, holding two beers in his hands. 

“So two line chefs called in, huh?” you prompt, tucking your legs up and making room for the large man on the sofa.

“I expected it from Haechan, but Mark’s generally pretty reliable. His girlfriend was on shift today, so I know he wasn’t skipping to be with her- I’m guessing they got pretty messed up last night.”

“They’re young,” you point out, accepting a beer from him. “We used to be young.”

“Used to be,” Johnny laughs, taking a swig of his drink. 

Looking at this man- this father, you realize maybe he never really got the chance to be young. At twenty five, he had a six year old, he wasn't running around blacking out and getting hung over, he was working his way up the employment ladder, dreaming about a better future for his daughter.

“You mentioned Mark has a girlfriend, I think I’ve heard about her a few times now, it’s interesting that she was in and he wasn’t.”

“I’m going to be honest, I love Mark, he’s a great kid- but, he can sometimes be peer pressured into things. Haechan has a hold on Mark unlike any I’ve seen, they bring out… interesting sides of each other.”

You laugh at the description, and it’s clear there’s more on Johnny’s mind, so you wait for him to continue. 

“It’s nice that Mark is young and in love, I can understand that- but at the same time, I just hope he doesn’t make the same mistakes I did. Not that Soonbok is a mistake, of course- I just mean that… life is fragile. You think you’re going to be with someone forever, and then you’re reminded of how frail things can be.”

You frown at his words. Even after all of these years, Johnny still holds so much pain about his lost wife. You want to do your best to help Johnny in every aspect of his life, especially emotional, but this is a topic you never know how to approach. He’s right for grieving, his ex was his first love, his true love- how is there anything you could ever say to make him feel better about her passing?

You open your mouth, only to close it, and Johnny watches you intently. Sometimes he looks at you, the way he’s looking at you right now, and you wonder if he feels the same level of connection with you that you feel with him. You wonder if he wants you to kiss him, if a kiss would make him feel better, if it would - if even for a moment - help him forget about the pains he’s faced in his life.

But it’s because of the pains he’s faced that neither of you can close the distance, you’d like to think about it that way at least. Even after all these years, it’s still too early, so you simply reach out and gently squeeze his hand.

Johnny offers you a smile, and you’re glad that in some small way, maybe you’ve helped him.

Five

It’s a pretty slow day after the lunch rush, so Johnny is sitting in the back office with Doyoung while they pick at their food. They often eat together once things settle down, and today is no different. 

What is different, however, is the topic of conversation Doyoung brings up. “How’s y/n doing?” he asks, taking a bite of his salad.

“She’s good. She helped me lock in a french toast recipe for Soonie’s birthday, so that was pretty helpful.”

“That’s nice,” Doyoung nods, “but I’m more interested in what’s going on between the two of you.”

“What do you mean?” Johnny asks, looking up from his schezwan beef noodle bowl. 

“I mean, you two have been friends for a long time. There’s a lot of history there.”

Johnny’s shocked that Doyoung is bringing this up. Out of all of the chef’s coworkers, he had not pegged Doyoung as being the man to bring up relationship gossip, and the whole thing takes him off guard for a moment. 

“We’re good friends,” Johnny says finally.

“I know that,” Doyoung rolls his eyes. “What’s holding you back from being more? It’s clear how much you two care about each other.”

Johnny looks down at his food, using his chopsticks to play around with a red pepper. “We do care about each other,” he confirms. “She was there for me with Soonie when no one else was, and I’ll always be grateful for that.”

“So why don’t you tell her how you really feel about her?” Doyoung presses. “It’s obvious in the way you look at each other- a smart woman like y/n, I’m shocked she hasn’t figured it out for herself by now.”

“I think, because of our history, there’s this… invisible line,” Johnny tries to explain. “Things are good the way they are now, if I try to mess with that… I could lose everything. And I wouldn’t just be losing it for myself, I’d be losing it for Soonie too.”

Doyoung lets out a breath, turning to face Johnny. “I get that it’s hard, but, you’ve got two paths ahead of you. If you give it a try, it could either end well, or badly. But if you keep yourself in this weird middle friend zone place, it’s like you’ve created a house at the crossroads, and that will never lead you anywhere.”

“When did you become so wise about love?” Johnny scoffs.

“Sumi has helped me with it,” Doyoung admits. “I met her here, we started off as friends. I’m her manager, so I had my own reasons for never taking the leap. I had my own house at the crossroads.”

“What made you finally give it a try?”

“She was there for me when my dad died,” Doyoung frowns. “Anyone can be there for you when things go badly, but when a woman truly gives her all to making things easier on you- it’s not something that should be ignored. After everything you and y/n have been through, you both deserve to give it a try.”

“How are you so sure she’d want to give it a try?”

“Because she looks at you the way you look at her.”

Six

Cooking with Johnny might just be the easiest thing in the world. You’d thought that, due to it being Soonie’s birthday, maybe tensions would be high, but as the two of you collaborate in the kitchen, bumping hips and easily communicating, things feel as they always have: easy. 

Within fifteen minutes, the two of you have seamlessly cooked thirteen breakfasts for yourselves, Soonie, her four friends, and six adults… well, seven, if you include the Boken Avocado Bennies you’d whipped up for Doyoung.

While there are a number of staff puttering around doing pre-opening tasks, it’s Doyoung who takes the time to help you and Johnny bring all the food to the table. You love watching the stoic manager announce the Soonie-inspired brunch food names, and it’s clear that Soonbok is also enamoured by the shift in Doyoung’s countenance. 

Before everyone begins to eat, you take a group picture on Johnny’s phone, loving the massive smile on Soonie’s face.

As you’re about to sit down, Johnny asks one of the other moms to take a picture of just you, him and Soonie. With the two of you on either side of the birthday girl, you can’t help but think that this feels like a family picture. 

In a way, Johnny and Soonie are your family- but in the same breath, you’re cognisant of the fact that - had circumstances been different - it would be Soonbok’s mom in this picture right now, and not you. These are shoes that can simply never be filled, no matter how much you wish you could.

The thought isn’t one you like to hold on to, and it’s a thought that’s popped into your head innumerable times throughout the years. Taking your seat next to the birthday girl, you watch her try the french toast, her eyes lighting up.

On top of her own food, Soonie picks at yours and Johnny’s. Both of you are more than happy to share so she can taste more than just one of the special items Johnny had concocted for her. 

Brunch is full of laughter and girlish giggles that light up the deserted restaurant. It’s clear how important Johnny has made Soonie feel today, and that brings you more joy than you could ever express out loud. 

As things wind down, you and Johnny begin clearing plates to the dishpit. The two of you are shoulder to shoulder, and you’re overwhelmed by an odd sense of longing that you can’t quite describe.

Johnny turns to you, mouth opening as if he’s about to say something- but as servers pass behind you, it’s clear that there’s no room for him to say whatever it is that he wanted to say to you.

You clear your throat, watching a line chef pop up next to Johnny to stack the dishes for dishwasher prep. “You should go back to Soonie,” you tell him, “I’ll finish up with the cleanup.”

“Are you sure?” he asks.

“Of course, it’s Soonie’s day, go be with her.” You offer him a smile, and Johnny reacts by reaching out to squeeze your hand.

Without another word, he leaves you to your thoughts, and the feeling of need that’s growing steadier and steadier in your chest.

Seven

Johnny doesn’t know quite what to do with himself. Soonie’s birthday was yesterday, and today's day shift had been quite slow. He’s feeling restless with Soonie over at a friend’s place tonight, and he tries to drown himself in liquor- whether it be to chase away the loneliness or to gain courage, he’s not sure, but by nine oclock, Johnny finds himself dialing up your number.

“Hey, you,” you answer.

“Hey, yourself,” he grins. “Watcha up to?”

There’s a pause, and Johnny can hear people in the background. “I’m out actually.”

“Oh?” Johnny’s spirits dampen. “Out on another hot date?”

“Not so hot actually.”

Johnny bites at his lip. “I’ll let you go anyways.”

“It’s alright, I stepped out when you called. Do you need something?”

“I guess…” Johnny takes a breath. “I got into the liquor-”

“Say no more, I’ll be right over.”

Eight

“So…” Johnny grins as the two of you head into his kitchen, “how did the date go?”

You scoff, watching him pour a glass of wine. “How do you think it went? I’m here with you, aren’t I?”

“I mean… I am pretty hard to compete with,” Johnny flashes you a sexy grin… and proceeds to knock over the glass of wine. “Shit- fuck!”

“Listen, you go take a seat, and I’ll clean this up,” you laugh, watching him lumber toward the sofa. You make quick work of the mess, and when you’re done, you approach him in the living room.

“Come sit,” he prompts, patting the spot right next to him.

“Someone’s feeling awfully cuddly today,” you giggle when he grabs your hand to pull you down where he wants you, leaving no space between the two of you.

“What can I say? I’m a cuddly drunk.” 

“I can see that,” you note, assessing him.

His gaze dips to your lips, and your skin tingles. 

“Thank you for yesterday,” he says quietly.

“I told you, I was happy to help for Soonie’s special day.”

“It’s not just that,” he insists, “you’re always happy to help. I seriously-” he swallows thickly, “I seriously couldn’t have done anything I’ve done without you.”

“Don’t be so self deprecating,” you warn him, gently pushing his shoulder. “You’d have gotten anywhere you wanted, with or without me.”

“I still don’t have a food truck,” Johnny pouts.

You’d thought maybe he’d given up on that dream- although you’ve held onto hope for Johnny, more than he knows. “Now that you mention it, actually,” you say, pulling out your phone, “I’ve been looking at food trucks for sale online for a minute, and-”

Johnny’s gaze softens. “You’ve been researching for me?”

“Just a little,” you brush it off, trying to find the listing that you’d saved three days ago. “I found this decent looking one at a good price-”

“I think I love you.”

“Huh?” you freeze.

“I didn’t mean it,” Johnny says immediately, and your heart sinks. “I don’t think I love you, I know I do.”

“John, please, that’s the liquor talking.”

“Drunk words are sober thoughts,” he insists. “Look, you’ve always been there for me. We work together- and not just because we’re both chefs. Something about this,” Johnny gestures between the two of you, “it just works, and I know I’m not the only one who sees it.”

“Yeah?” You decide to play a little coy, seeing as this confession is coming from a drunk man. “And who else sees it?”

“Doyoung, for one.”

“Doyoung?” You let out a laugh. “Have you been gossiping about me with him?”

“I swear I didn’t bring it up,” Johnny defends himself. “Doyoung said I look at you with love, and that… that you look at me the same way.”

“Well… maybe Doyoung needs to get his eyes checked?”

“Don’t play with me,” Johnny begs, pulling you closer. “There’s always been a line between us, one we’ve both been too scared to cross… but, I think-”

“Now you’re crossing it,” you finish for him. “What made you want to do that?”

“Soonie’s birthday,” Johnny admits. “Our little family picture.”

“Our family picture,” you repeat, melting inside at the fact that he’d viewed the photo in the same light you had.

“Yeah.” Johnny nods. “Our family. Mine, and yours.” 

His hand finds your thigh, and you can’t help but reach out to cup his cheek, stroking your thumb across his angular bones. “I’m not sure what to say,” you admit.

“We don’t have to say anything,” Johnny assures you. “Just kiss me, and we can forget about the world for a minute.”

Your heart is racing in your chest as you hesitantly close the distance between your lips. It’s a gentle first kiss, but it soon grows hungry, and you’re not sure if that’s due to his appetite or your own.

His tongue swipes across your lip, and you open your mouth for him, letting out a soft sigh as you get lost in the feeling of the man who’s been your best friend for years.

His hand on your thigh squeezes, and before you know it, he’s pulling you onto his lap. Your knees dig into the sofa on either side of him, and you’re hesitant to fully sit down- a kiss is a kiss, but grinding on Johnny is something else entirely.

“Johnny,” you whisper, throwing your head back to look at the ceiling, wondering how you got into this situation.

“Yes, honey?” He presses kisses along your throat that have tingles shooting up your spine.

“You’re drunk,” you say finally.

“If I’d known you liked me too, I would have done this ages ago.”

“It’s not about that,” you laugh. “It’s about the fact that you’re drunk, and I want you sober when we do this.”

“Do what?” he teases, squeezing your hips, his tongue grazing over your jugular.

“You know what,” you retort with a huff. “Look, you’re right about the line neither of us wanted to cross.”

Johnny pulls away from your throat, looking up at you. “Huh?”

“The line. The unspoken line. All these years, something has been there, between us- but, we both respect your wife, we respect Soonie- I think… I think the time is right for this now, well, not right now, but, once you’re sober again.”

“You’re right,” Johnny concedes. 

“How about we watch a movie, then we can go to sleep.”

“You’ll stay over?” There’s a boyish excitement in his voice and it makes you melt.

“Uh huh.”

“Will you stay in my bed with me?”

“Just for cuddles, but only if you promise to drink a bunch of water before we sleep, I don’t want you hung over in the morning.”

Johnny grins. “You got it, honey.”

Nine

Johnny wakes up next to a warm body, and it’s the first time in years. Your presence is the only thing that proves to him that last night wasn’t a dream, some twisted fantasy- No, you’re real, and you’re here, and you’d kissed him back-

He stays cuddled with you for a while, basking in the glow of being in love, truly in love, and finally able to admit it to himself. It’s been so long since his wife, and part of him had forgotten the feeling- maybe that’s why it had taken years for him to realize how much he adores you.

After a while, Johnny decides he needs some water- and he wants to make breakfast for you. He wants to spoil you the way you spoil him.

Johnny is careful as he exits the bed, taking one last look at your peaceful face before heading down to the kitchen.

It’s easy for Johnny to get lost in the act of cooking, focusing on bacon at first before switching to eggs. As it was a few days ago, the smell of food wakes you up, and soon you’re joining him by the stove.

“Watcha making?” you ask, wrapping your body around his.

God, the feeling of you is- fuck, he can’t even describe how good it is.

“Wanted to make you breakfast,” he tells you, plating your food first. Once he has you settled and sitting, he quickly throws together a breakfast sandwich for himself.

“You and your sandwiches,” you laugh, digging into your bacon and eggs.

“How did you sleep?” he asks, coming to join you.

“So well,” you tell him, bumping your knee against his own, “even if someone snores.” 

Johnny can only laugh, he’s dealt with Soonbok complaining about his loud snoring for years. “How are the eggs?”

“Good!” 

You’re so chipper this morning, and he loves it. Johnny takes a bite of his sandwich- you’d cooked the eggs at the brunch birthday two days ago, and he realizes Soonie was right. “Your eggs are better,” he muses.  

“I’d planned on making breakfast for you, but you jumped the gun, big guy.”

“I wanted to pamper you for a change.”

“Cooking is my love language,” you tell him. “I’m excited to make you breakfast more often.”

“I like the sound of that,” he smiles.

“When’s Soonie come home?”

Johnny checks the clock on the stove. “In an hour or so.”

“As much as I’d love to see her, I think maybe it’s better if I’m not here when she gets home,” you say thoughtfully. “She’s a smart girl, I bet she’d be able to tell that something is up.”

“She definitely would,” Johnny confirms. “I don’t think I’ll be able to keep my hands off of you that much if you stick around.”

You giggle, reaching over to squeeze his knee.

“How are you feeling about last night?” Johnny asks.

“I’m feeling good, how about you? Still remember all of it?”

“In perfect detail,” he breathes. “Although… a little reminder wouldn’t hurt.”

“Oh, it wouldn’t?” you tease as he leans in, cupping your face so he can press his lips to your own. 

God, you’re such a good kisser. It just works. It’s hard for him to even pull away, but he doesn’t want to overwhelm you.

“Take me out on a date,” you say.

“Hmm?”

“A date,” you repeat. “Just because we’ve known each other for years doesn’t mean we can skip steps.”

“I respect that,” Johnny nods. “I’ve got a busy week, and it will have to be a night where Soonie is out, but… we’ll make it work.”

Johnny’s so certain it will work, because things between you have always worked, and he can’t wait to see where this takes you. 

Ten

It’s been a week, but finally Johnny found time for that date night. Soonie is out with friends again, so it’s the perfect opportunity to get some alone time with the man who’s been on your mind constantly.

He picks you up in his old Dodge truck, compliments your outfit, and refuses to tell you where you’re going or what the plan is.

When you arrive back at his place, you’re honestly not even surprised. “Let me guess, you took me to the best chef in town?”

“You know all my lines, honey,” he grins. 

“So, chef, what’s on the menu?”

“I thought maybe you’d take a seat and let me cook for you.”

“As if I’d take a back seat,” you scoff. “What are we making?”

Johnny had made hand made fettucini before he’d come to pick you up. You let him take lead in making a white wine, garlic cream sauce with button mushrooms, spinach and crispy prosciutto, but you insist on being his sous chef and taking care of the chicken.

The smell is heavenly, and as he finishes it all off with fresh herbs, you think you start to drool a little.

“For a guy who claims to specialize in sandwiches of all things, you’re pretty good with italian,” you muse as you take your first bite and nearly moan.

“I’m pretty good with a lot of things,” Johnny laughs. 

“Look at you being all cocky.”

“You love it.”

He’s so right.

The two of you chat and laugh together while eating. It’s one of the best meals you’ve had in a very long time. When dinner is over, Johnny suggests a movie. As the two of you settle on the couch, he prompts you to come closer, and soon, the two of you are cuddled together as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.

He’s so warm and comforting- you find yourself dozing off a little, although, maybe it’s something of a food coma from all the pasta.

Johnny brings his lips to your ear, and you shiver when he asks, “Should I carry you to bed, honey?” 

Part of you wants to tell him you’re not Soonie and you won’t be calling him daddy any time soon- but another part of you wants to lean into this. It’s been so long since you felt like you could be babied, and if anyone is going to bring out that side of you, it’s going to be Johnny.

“Won’t I be too heavy?” you ask, cognizant of the stairs he’ll have to climb.

“Have you seen my arms? I won’t drop you, honey, I promise.”

You allow him to scoop you up, and you feel like a giggling school girl again as he takes you up to his room. “Do you have a shirt I could wear to sleep?” 

“Choose anything,” he tells you. “When you’re changed, you can join me in the bathroom, I went and got a toothbrush for you.”

Before you know it, you’re cuddled in Johnny’s bed, wearing panties and one of his big shirts. He’s pressed to your back, his mint tinged breath warm on the nape of your neck. There’s no pressure for sex, no pressure for anything other than the situation at hand, and you can tell you’re both very content with it. 

Soon, you’re drifting off to sleep in the arms of a man who’s been a cornerstone of your life.

It’s a deep, dreamless sleep, and it passes in the blink of an eye. You awaken to light beaming through his window, a warm body behind you, and something hard pressed against your ass.

You laugh to yourself- morning wood isn’t something men can help. Even so, you stir a little, adjusting to get more comfortable.

Johnny releases a sleepy groan.

You stay still, not wanting to wake him, but it feels like the damage is already done when he wraps you tighter in his embrace. “Morning,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.

“Hi,” you respond lightly.

Now it’s Johnny’s turn to shift, and you feel his body tense when he does so. “Fuck,” he goes to pull away, “sorry, I uh-”

“It’s okay,” you assure him, grabbing his forearm so he can’t move away, “keep cuddling me.”

Johnny returns, flush against your back, his hard cock pressing even more firmly to your ass.

“Are you sure you’re alright with this?” he asks.

“More than okay with it.”

“Yeah?” He leans forward, pressing his lips to your throat. “Are you okay with this, too?” Johnny mumbles, his hot breath fanning across your skin.

“Uh huh,” you sigh, wiggling your bum back against him and arching your neck to give him better access.

His hand finds your hip, gently squeezing you through the shirt you’re wearing. His lips are soft against you, but there’s a need in his motions too, and he begins to grind against your ass.

You let out a groan when he finds the sweet spot just below your ear, and he licks at it, making you moan louder.

“Are we going to do this?” he asks, nipping at your earlobe.

“Fuck it, yes.” You can’t hold back anymore, you turn in his embrace, quickly mounting him and smashing your lips to his own.

Johnny grins into the kiss, holding your hips while you settle on top of him, grinding down against his clothed cock while your tongues begin to clash.

His kisses have you seeing stars, your mind going blank except for him.

Soon, his hands slip under your shirt, slowly grazing up your sides. “Can I take this off of you?” he asks.

You open your eyes to look down at him, studying his pretty lips and his chocolate eyes. 

Instead of responding, you sit up, grabbing the hem of the oversized T and lifting it over your head, tossing it to the side and baring yourself to your best friend for the first time.

“Fuck,” Johnny groans, gaze falling to your tits. His hands stay at a respectable location on your hips, and you grab one to lift it to your breast, adding pressure so he knows he’s allowed to give you a test squeeze.

Johnny begins to massage you, and you throw your head back, releasing a groan, swiveling your hips against him.

His thumb brushes over your hardened nipple and you mewl loudly, core throbbing from the stimulus.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers, propping himself up so he can take your nipple into his mouth.

You cup the back of his head, keeping him on your chest while he worships you. His other hand finds your neglected breast, gently pinching and massaging while he sucks on your sensitive bud.

“John-” You don’t even know what to say, you’re entirely wrapped up in him. 

You’ve never felt a feral need like this before, but it’s not necessarily the primal type of drive. Instead, it’s a feeling of wanting to be close to this man- who you’ve been next to for so many years, but unable to touch. 

Except, he’s touching you now, and you want more. 

Johnny pulls away from your breasts, cupping the back of your head and drawing your lips to his again. “We should take our clothes off,” he suggests.

“That’s the best idea you’ve had all week,” you laugh. 

He helps you off of him, and you lay next to each other for a moment, both fumbling to get naked. As soon as you’re fully nude, Johnny rolls on top of you, slotting between your thighs. His lips find yours again, and his free hand trails down your body, teasing through your pussy lips.

“You’re already so wet,” he muses.

“I’ve wanted this for a long time,” you admit.

“Me too,” he assures you, capturing your mouth with his own while he teases a finger into your hole. You push your hips up, wanting more, and you latch onto his strong shoulders, moaning into the kiss.

Johnny’s a big man, and his finger is enough to have you wriggling below him. “Easy, honey,” he grins, looking down at you with eyes full of adoration. “Gotta stretch you open.”

“Fuck,” you groan- does this man read erotica in his spare time? How is a thirty year old, single dad, this well versed in dirty talk even though you’re pretty sure he hasn’t been laid in forever?

He adds a second finger, curling them to find your gspot. As he pumps his hand, lips pressed to yours in a mad frenzy, you can hear your wetness with each motion. 

It feels unreal- have fingers alone ever done a number like this on you?

Johnny twists his hand a little, knuckles dragging along your sensitive inner walls. It’s like he’s trying to carve out a space for his cock, although, you know now that this won’t be enough. He’s thick and throbbing on your hip, his length so large you think he might just blow your entire back out when he slips it into you.

Even though you’re eager to be - for lack of a better word - impaled on him, Johnny takes his time kissing you, his fingers continuing their motions. “Wanna rub your clit for me?” he asks, moving his mouth to your neck. “I want to watch you cum.”

Your toes curl at his words, and you bring your hand to your pussy, drawing circles on the sensitive bud while he continues to stroke your inner walls.

Your core throbs around him, whimpers of pleasure escaping you. 

“You’re being so good for me, honey,” Johnny tells you, making your insides flutter even more from the sincere words of praise.

Cumming hasn’t always been the easiest thing in the world for you. There are many partners you’ve had who never had the wherewithal to get you there- but somehow, Johnny just knows you. Or maybe, it’s because he knows you- because you feel safe with him, that you feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge.

It also helps that it’s your own fingers on your clit, you know exactly what you like, what pressure, what motions- the digits working you open are just an added bonus that have you seeing stars as you make your way to your peak.

“John,” you gasp, tits pushing up toward his chest when your back arches. “I’m gonna-”

“Let it out for me,” he encourages you softly. “You deserve it.”

“I deserve your cock,” you whine, shocked at your own blatant neediness.

Johnny only laughs. “After,” he assures you, “I promise.”

A few more circles of your clit has the cord in your stomach snapping, your orgasm washing over your like warm summer waves. Your entire body tingles with delight, gasps leaving you as your pussy fully throbs around his fingers, your clit pulsing with desire.

“So pretty,” he whispers, bringing his lips to yours.

From the way he smiles against your mouth, you can tell he doesn’t care that you’re moaning so much he can hardly kiss you.

It’s a closeness you’ve never felt before, and he helps you through your orgasm until you’re pulling your hand away in favour of grabbing his shoulders.

Johnny takes his fingers out of your core, and you watch under hooded eyelids as he brings them to his lips, sucking them clean and releasing a groan. “Everything you do tastes better than what I bring to the table.”

You laugh. He’s such a fucking chef.

“Some might even say it’s…” you stifle a giggle, “Finger licking good.” 

Johnny lets out a laugh, eyes lighting up. God, you love this soft, laughter infused sex- you’ve never experienced anything like it.

You grab the back of his neck, drawing his mouth to your own. You can taste yourself on his tongue, and there’s something so erotic about it. He moans loudly, rubbing his cock between your wet pussy lips.

The tip of his cock is stimulating your clit and it sends jitters through you. You can feel how soaked you are, and you wouldn’t be surprised if this ended with a wet patch on his bed from how turned on you’ve been throughout this whole experience.

Johnny seems intent with grinding against you, but you’re lacking patience today, and you reach between your bodies to grab his cock.

Johnny breaks the kiss, pressing his forehead against yours and looking down at where you’re gripping him. He doesn’t say anything, his gaze shifting back to your own. There’s a question in his eyes, and you’re both aware that this is the final line. Once you cross this, there’s no going back.

You bring his cock to your wet hole, and with very little effort, you help guide the head of his cock inside of you.

“Fuck,” Johnny groans immediately, fists bunching at the pillow on either side of your head. “You’re so tight- are you sure you’re good with this?”

“You’re just- fuck,” you whimper as another inch sinks into you, “you’re just big!”

“Maybe you’ll have to get used to it,” he grins, pushing deeper.

You moan loudly, clawing at his shoulders. “Maybe I will,” you gasp. 

He brings his mouth close to your own, until your lips are just brushing, eyes meeting when he says, “I’m looking forward to it.”

As he kisses you, he pushes fully into your warm, wet, throbbing core. His hips are flush to your own, and you swear no one’s ever been this deep inside of you.

Your legs shake on either side of his hips, body suspended in this odd purgatory-like place between extreme pleasure, and an uncomfortable feeling of being stretched more than you’ve ever been stretched before.

“Are you good?” he asks, lips moving to your cheek while you struggle to aclimatize to his cock.

“Yeah,” you nod quickly. “Just- fuck me, it will be easier.”

“If you say so, honey.”

The first thrust has your toes curling, eyes clenching shut with pleasure. A sound that’s never come from you before leaves your lips- a sound you’ve heard in porn, but always thought was an overexpression.

Your fingers dig into Johnny’s shoulders, and he holds you close, mouth finding your neck while he begins to fuck you.

Although, would this be called fucking?

The fluidity of his motions- the way you’re clinging to each other- it feels more like making love, and your skin tingles with the realization.

“Johnny?” you whisper.

“Yeah?”

“Tell me you love me again, like you did when you were drunk.”

“I love you,” he says immediately, holding you even tighter. “I love you so much that sometimes it hurts.”

Your entire body both relaxes and is set on fire by his words, your core throbbing desperately around his massive cock. 

“Johnny-” you whimper.

“Tell me you love me too,” he pleads.

“I love you too,” you whisper, threading your fingers through his hair and bringing his face close to yours so you can look up into his eyes. “I love you too.” 

Johnny’s hand finds your thigh, hiking it higher on his hip. Somehow, he hits even deeper now, and you wriggle below him, more sounds of pleasure escaping you and filling the room.

“You sound so good, honey- I won’t last if you keep squeezing me and moaning-”

“Then don’t last,” you gasp. “Want you to cum.”

“Where should I cum?”

“Inside- I’m on birth control, just- fuck, Johnny, cum inside.”

He groans, pressing his mouth firmly to your own, his tongue dancing along yours as his motions get even faster.

You’re clinging to him for dear life at this point, and when he slips a hand between your bodies to rub your clit, you nearly begin to cry from how good it feels.

“Love the way your pussy sucks me in when we play with your clit,” he tells you. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck-

“Do you think you can cum for me again? I don’t want to be the only one cumming.”

“Yeah, yeah- fuck, yeah, I can cum again,” you whimper desperately.

“Let me know when,” he instructs, adjusting his motions ever so slightly so each thrust has his cock dragging against your gspot.

You let out a squeal of delight, your thighs shaking around his hips, stomach muscles clenching almost painfully-

“Fuck, John, I’m there- shit, fuck-”

Johnny shuts you up with his lips against your own, and for a second time, your orgasm hits you.

Your core clamps down incredibly hard on his cock, and Johnny groans deeply above you, fingers twitching on your clit. He keeps his pace, and a moment later, you feel his cum filling you up, coating your walls with warmth.

The feeling of his large length throbbing in your own oversensitive hole has your entire mind going fuzzy, and you kiss him like a woman lost, like a woman so completely in love that nothing else matters.

You ride out your orgasms together, until you’re both shaking. Only then does Johnny come to a stop on top of you, kisses turning to a more gentle nature as he holds you close. 

“I love you,” he tells you again.

You smile, blinking up at your best friend. “And I love you.”

Epilogue

The two of you are in the kitchen cooking brunch. Johnny is pressed to your back, watching intently, asking all sorts of questions about how you cook eggs to make them so delicious and superior to his own.

“The secret ingredient is love,” you tease.

Johnny can only laugh, holding you tighter.

He’s so lost in you, that he loses track of time, and as the two of you are sitting down to eat, Soonbok walks through the front door. She stops in her tracks when she sees you, letting her little overnight bag slip to the ground.

“Oh, hi, baby,” Johnny stands up immediately.

“Hi, daddy,” Soonie says, allowing her dad to pick her up for a hug while her eyes shift to you.

“Did Sabrina’s mom drop you off?” Johnny asks, looking out the door to wave at Soonie’s friend’s mom as she drives away.

“As always, daddy,” Soonie laughs. “I didn’t know y/n was coming over.”

“Surprise,” you grin, also standing so that when Johnny sets his daughter to the ground, she can run to give you a hug of your own.

Once Soonie is done squeezing you as tight as her little arms can muster, she looks between you and Johnny. For some reason, Johnny feels his heart beginning to race, there’s a knowing in his daughters eyes.

“What’s going on?” Soonie asks finally.

“Y/N and I just had a little sleep over,” Johnny tries to explain, and the concept isn’t a new one, you sleep over frequently… in the guest bedroom.

“So…” a wicked grin appears on Soonbok’s face, “Does this mean you’ll stop trying to get me to call her auntie now?”

“What?” Johnny lets out a surprised laugh.

“You heard me, daddy,” Soonbok’s smile widens. “Does this… does this mean we’ll be a real family now?”

Johnny lets out a shuddery breath. In the years you’ve been helping raise Soonbok, Johnny has broached the idea of her calling you Auntie Y/N, as a respect thing, and his daughter has always refused. Had she seen the connection this whole time? Has this been something Soonbok has wanted ever since she was a five year old with an inquisitive mind and an even more discerning eye?

Johnny’s gaze shifts to you, and you flash him a warm smile.

“Yeah, baby,” Johnny picks up his daughter. “We can be a real family now.”

☀️ mlist + an. Thank you so much for reading! This was such a fun project for me, thank you so much to everyone who encouraged me to write for Chef John, he deserved his happy ending :)

🍭 support me by. sending a tip here or here - or become a patron to access monthly bonus content and extensions for fics like this one :) find the Patreon teaser below! 

🔮 preview. The man ordering can’t see you lying on the floor of the food truck. He has no idea what’s going on- and you feel like tempting fate a little. You bring your hand to your pussy, beginning to rub yourself through your pants, adjusting the vibrator ever so slightly as it buzzes inside you. Johnny nearly drops the tomato he’s holding, quickly tearing his gaze from yours. You’ve never seen him trying to focus this hard- and failing. What had been your torture initially, has just become his own, and you kind of love it.

cw/ tw. Unprotected sex, exhibitionism (fucking in a food truck), use of vibrator while helping a customer, vibrator as a makeshift gag ball, breast worship, fucking with half your clothes on, fingering, multiple reader orgasms, big dick Johnny, pussy stretching, dirty talk, praise, breeding kink, etc…   I petnames. (hers) honey

👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 3.1k I teaser wc. 230

🌙 starring. Johnny x afab!Reader

bonus

You love working with Johnny. Sure, it had been rough at first, getting his food truck on its feet, but it’s been two years, and with some insanely good marketing, you’re now running one of the top trucks in the city.

It’s a joy to watch Johnny fulfill his dreams every day- his odd obsession with sandwiches of all things has only added to your connection. Watching him smile and charm guests makes your heart swell with joy, and on the rare occasion Soonie comes to do the register and take orders, it feels like you’re just one happy family.

Today, however, is a weather disaster. The forcast had mentioned light sprinkles, but cuddled next to Johnny looking out at the torrential downpour, you both feel a little bamboozled.

“You know what would make this more fun?” Johnny asks.

“Customers?” you suggest.

“Yes, but also… I got you something.” The chef flashes you a sly smirk, and you pull away from his shoulder to asses him.

“Am I going to like where this is going?” you ask.

He was single for so long- and there’d been so many sexual things he’d missed out on during that time, but the two of you are making up for it every moment you have alone. You suppose this is a moment alone, so you’re not really shocked that his mind is in the gutter.

☀️ to read the full fic AND 3.1k bonus NOW, subscribe to my Patreon, then click here

👹 or check out what else is on my patreon here

🔮if nothing strikes your fancy, check out my m.list

general taglist

@gotshinct - @runahways - @milkteade - @mocha000

@anothershorthuman - @notbeforelong - @darthlunaa

@chogiwapadada - @meowniee - @pandabur666

@just-here-to-read-01​ - @shiningnono - @lovelyhan -

@grilledbananas - @quennlenn - @zezedoesshit

@unlikelysublimekryptonite - @wonwoothinker

nct taglist

@peachyjaemin - @sehunniepot - @shailasthings

thanks to those who interacted with the teaser

@nosungluv - @bbeanetta - @stolasisyourparent

@kundann - @blspphr3 - @heavenly-mobo

@icedearlgreytea - @sourkimchi - @d0nghyck

@bobathi - @sillybeanstrings - @biancaness

@nominsgirl - @thebubsz - @froggyforyoongi

@yeomyeom - @babieculture - @dvalities - @xusbabe

@jaessunflower214 - @pandabur666 - @justwonus-recs

@markgeollie - @binniesbabe - @axo-l0tl

[woogyu]

49. “If i didn’t know you better, i’d say you were trying to flirt by giving me books.”

58. “So, we’re just going to ignore the fact that you drunk-dialed me to tell me you love me?”

Drabble Prompts; fluff | angst | funny // Requests; OPEN

notes; thank you so much for requesting! this ended up being more of a fluffy-angsty blend, but I hope you enjoy it! I kind of love how it turned out, ngl.

wc; ~1451

You didn’t know when it had started, or why he began passing along books to you. He always worked the nightshift, conveniently the same time that you always found refuge in the old library. You like the quiet serene atmosphere of the building and the smell of old books around you. Sometimes you would work on homework or just read for pleasure. You visited nearly every night, and for as long as you can remember Wonwoo was the librarian working while you were there.

He must have picked up on the genres and types of books you enjoyed by observing what you read while you were there. At first it was just once in a while. He would slip books onto the table you were reading at when you were too lost in the pages to notice and hope you picked them up. Over time he grew bolder and began giving them to you directly while you were checking out. A few months ago, he started talking with you about the books he had recommended in the past, if you liked them and what you didn’t like.

You had grown used to this routine of him telling you about the books he thought you would like, his voice low and quiet. You never disliked any of his recommendations. It’s like he knew exactly what to give you at any given time, and you were convinced it must be a superpower.

“This is a new one we just got in” you heard the familiar baritone voice say you in hushed tones, settling down in the seat next to yours. You looked up from your book with curious eyes as you watched him with a smile. Watching him light up when explaining books to you was one of the reasons your heart did funny things when you thought about him. You didn’t know what to label this feeling, but it was warm and true.

“It’s a love story, about this guy and girl that bond over their shared love of reading. They grew tired of exploring foreign worlds and trying on different lives. They decide to end the chapters of their lives where they are alone and begin a new chapter that they write together” he explained with a hum. You couldn’t see the cover of the book with the way he held it out to you, but the story he was describing made you laugh a little bit at the familiarity of it.

“If I didn’t know you better, I’d say you were trying to flirt by giving me books.” you joked, reaching out to take the item from his hands. He laughed and pushed his chair back, “Let me know what you think of it, alright?” he said, a mischievous glint in his eyes. You looked up at him and nodded, you always told him you review of what he recommended, so you weren’t sure why he was reminding you about it.

You didn’t get a chance to look at the book he had given you, your phone distracting you. This was another routine, your fiancé texting you and asking where you were. He never understood your love for books, claiming that they were ‘just pieces of dead trees’.

»»————-　♡　————-««

‘I’m breaking up with you, I’ve found someone else’, the words echoed over and over again in your head, not amount of alcohol dulling their sting. You shouldn’t be so hurt, the two of you had never seen eye to eye and you shared no common interest. It wasn’t that you had lost someone you only ever had neutral feelings for, it was that he tossed you away so easily. He barely spared you a second glance when he left with his things.

You couldn’t bear to spend another minute in the space you two had inhabited together. You ended up at a nearby bar, crying into shots of tequila.

You sniffled as you reached into your bag to grab a tissue, your hand brushing over the book Wonwoo had given you earlier. Pulling it out of your bag you weren’t exactly sure what possessed you to open it, but your intoxicated brain was definitely confused as to why all the pages were blank.

A small card fell out and landed on the counter. You blinked a few times to clear your vision before reading it over:

If you want to write that story, I told you about together, call me xxx-xxxx-xxx

You choked back a sob when you finally put the pieces together. You never told Wonwoo about your fiancé, and now you doubted he would want you. Who would want something that someone else threw away?

Pulling out your phone you clumsily typed in the numbers on the card, heart thumbing as the line rang.

“Hello?” you heard a deep groggy voice answer, a fresh wave of tears falling when you realized how comforting it was to hear his voice.

“Why couldn’t it have been you~” you slurred a little bit, rubbing your nose against your sleeve. “Why did I get engaged to that other guy? Why couldn’t I have found you sooner?” you cried, the alcohol circumventing the filter that usually stopped these kinds of things from coming out of your mouth.

“You’ve been drinking” he said, it wasn’t a question merely an observation.

“Yeah I’ve been drinking” you snapped, already forgetting why you called him. “Came home and he just tossed me away like a forgotten wrapper. He found someone prettier, someone better…” you explained, wiping away stray tears.

“I didn’t even have feelings for him… especially not since I met you” you continued, voice cracking.

“Where are you y/n?” he asked, you could faintly hear the jingling of keys on the other line. “Some bar by the library” you hiccupped, nearly slipping out of your chair.

“I want to write that story wonu, god I’ve never wanted to write something more” you cried, your bottom lip shaking. “But you can do better than me, I’m not good enough for you. I wasn’t even good enough to keep that other guy from leaving” you said in an impossibly small voice.

“Stay where you are, okay? I’m coming to pick you up” he said before pausing, “And why don’t you let me decide if you’re good enough for me or not” he added, his voice tense.

“I’m in love with you” you breathed, unable to stop yourself from blurting it out. “It happened slowly over time, and I can’t pinpoint what did it, but god am I in love with you” you said.

You were vaguely aware when Wonwoo showed up at the bar to get you, and when you threw up all over his shoes, but the rest of the night was a blur.

»»————-　♡　————-««

You woke up the next morning with a pounding headache, grimacing as you opened your eyes. “Finally, awake, are you?” you heard a voice muse, causing your eyes to snap open. You glanced around the room and realized you didn’t recognize where you were, and why were your clothes all sticky.

“Here” he said, walking over and helping you sit up. He handed you some aspirin and a glass of water, sitting on the edge of the bed as he made sure you didn’t choke on the pill. Your fuzzy memories started to come back to you, and one of your hands flew to your mouth in horror.

“Oh god” you said, looking at him with a guilty expression. You had quite literally spilled your guts to him last night… in more ways than one. He seemed to notice when realization dawned on you, a teasing smirk settling on his lips.

“So, we’re just going to ignore the fact that you drunk-dialed me to tell me you love me?” he teased, helping you set the glass of water back down on the nightstand. You held up your hand to stop whatever other cheeky comment he had saved up, your brain still far too scrambled to deal with it right now.

“Don’t-“ you stated, your hand coming up to press against your forehead. “Just let me, come to terms with my embarrassment first” you groaned, wondering if it was possible that the mattress could just swallow you.

“Take all the time you need” he said, his voice much softer than before. Reaching up he brushed a strand of hair away from your face and smiled.

“I was serious you know, about writing that story together” he said, his cheeks taking on a dusty glow.

“I-I think I would really like that” you whispered back, giving him a small reassuring smile.

[ohheyitsokay]

steal

part 7 of the ‘hey batter batter’ series

pairing: Francisco Morales (Frankie, Catfish) x reader

wordcount: 2.5k

warnings: strong language, mentions of previous substance abuse and mediocre family relationships, a happy, happy ending

summary: it’s a Triple Frontier Baseball AU! Trust me, you don’t need to know anything about baseball.

in baseball, to ‘steal’ is for someone already on base to to the next base when the ball is live, but before his time. 

In this chapter, Frankie takes you out to dinner, and in telling you about himself, accidently goes way too hard, way too fast. 

>>

Frankie called and asked you to an early dinner.

Early, so the restaurant wouldn’t be crowded. Early, so he wouldn’t have the chance to overthink. Early, so the boys wouldn’t catch word and cause chaos.

Early, so he’d have all the time in the world with you, if you wanted.

When he picked you up, neither of you had the time to worry about your clothes or hair or fuss with it, and it was a relief. Someday, you hoped to get the chance to dress up for each other, but for now, casual seemed most fitting. He opened the door of his truck for you, holding your hand as you stepped into it. It wasn’t that you needed the extra help, he just seemed like he wanted to. 

You didn’t see, but his hand flexed, tingling as he walked around to climb in the driver’s side.

The talk came easy - Francisco forwent superfluous pleasantries and when he asked you questions there was no doubt in your mind that he actually wanted to hear your answers. You found yourself spilling about your job, flushing when you caught him watching you talk closer than the road, something soft in his eyes.

It was a stereotype, that a baseball player would like diner food, and you were pleasantly surprised when his truck slid into the tiny parking lot of a mom ‘n pop Hispanic restaurant. It was cute, watching him run around to open your door again, and he asked “Is this okay?” as he helped you down.

In response, you shifted your hand in his until his large fingers were laced with yours, and said yes, of course a little breathlessly. There was a lovely lady both serving and hosting who acted like she knew Francisco, giving him a broad wink and rapid fire teasing in what you could only assume was Spanish. In truth, you were too distracted by the way his thumb was running over the back of your hand, and the smells of corn and peppers and homemade tortillas.

Seated, she asked if you would be alright with anything, and your date looked eager and hopeful, so you would be a monster not to agree.

“So you come here often,” you said when she left. Not a direct question, although you were sure you wanted to hear the story. Francisco grinned.

“Are you flirting with me?” His eyebrows dipped in the middles, betraying a little more hope than he intended.

“Yes?” It was easier to tease as the waitress put plate after steaming plate between you, and a container full of warm tortillas. You spread your napkin over your lap as you thanked her, ignoring the growl in your stomach. As much as you liked that he let you talk, you wanted to know more about him, wanted to give him the chance to say whatever he left out the other night. There was certainly more to the solid catcher than met the eye, learning him felt as natural as your hunger.

“I’m serious though, what should I try first?” You pointed at various things with your fork, and Francisco almost wiggled he looked so happy. It was a dream, having you tucked into the little booth across from him, trust in your eyes.

“The green chili, Anita makes it from scratch regularly and it’s fantastic,” he pointed, eyes watching with joy as you dug into the smothered burrito. Your moan shot through him, warming his whole body more than the food he swallowed in a hurry. “Good, yeah?”

“Amazing,” you didn’t ask again, how he knew, just began filling your stomach. He told you about various dishes, sharing them with you like it was the most natural thing in the world. Eventually, the story came out naturally.

“I used to come here a lot when I first moved to town,” he shrugged. “It’s halfway between the stadium and where my family is right now.”

It was easy to meet his eyes and you didn’t pry. Twirling a long string of molten cheese on his fork, it poured out of him, telling more than you felt like you deserved to know and watching you carefully.

He started at the beginning, how it felt like home, this little restaurant, but safer. His mother and sister lived in a small town nearby. It was messy, his youth, full of shit a kid shouldn’t have to deal with. Baseball had been his way out, his chance at a life he couldn’t have. To be good at something, to have a team to belong to. Clean uniforms and clean money, from prizes, that put meat on his bones and filled out his sister’s cheeks.

He became Frankie, pouring his heart into it until he excelled, working like he needed it to survive.

When the scholarships rolled in, he picked the one farthest away, sending checks from his nightshift part-time home more often than he called. He thought his life was good, that running away was working. Being drafted was a dream come true – and a nightmare. It came with and confirmed nasty truths, about the industry and people who wanted his success for all the wrong reasons. Those first few years were full of parties and bad decisions, chasing highs and losing track of himself in the thick of it all. One night, Santi dragged him back, reminded him why he did all of it, reminded him who they had dreamed of being. Showed him they could still be those people.

“I didn’t really know him then, we played on different teams. But we hit rock bottom around the same time and ended up leaving early from the same party.” Frankie pushed the final few grains of rice around his plate, and you wondered if that was the party Tom had gotten busted at. If they really had rescued each other, more than they realized.

God or fate gave him a second chance, and they got traded to the same team the next season, close to his home. He started visiting, supplying himself instead of just money, still playing the game - but allowing himself to enjoy it, be a human.

A tray of sopapillas came as he was telling you animatedly how bad his mother was at gardening, and how silly he felt trying to help her. It made him glow, his pride at how far he had come and you wanted to hug him. Frankie stared at the soft, puffed pastry, as if realizing for the first time he had no idea how long he’d been talking. Then he pushed his card into Anita's hand and shot you a nervous look. You shrugged, but it wasn’t about the payment, at least not entirely.

“Would you want to take these to go?”

“Go where?”

“I was thinking maybe… to meet them?” There was a silent beat, as your hands almost dropped the plates you’d been stacking.

“Wait, shit, sorry I just –” Frankie had never felt so stupid in his life. He blew it, he definitely fucked this up. He had just told you his entire life story and decided now, your very first date? Yeah, that would be a good time for you to meet his family. Thus far you’d listened and reacted like a dream, as kind and considerate as you’d ever been, but this was too much. 

Your laugh cut off his spiral.

“Okay,”

“What?”

“Okay, let’s do it.” You were shaking your head in disbelief, but god was your smile beautiful. Bright and genuine, it made him wonder again if you felt like he did. Like this wasn’t really your first date.

Like you were as deep as he was, already.

-

On the drive he told you the rest of it. His sister was running from herself like he had, except in sucky, deadbeat men. About how when they had conversation that carried them in circles and he wanted to lock her up and force her into therapy, or when the world of baseball became too much, how he went to that restaurant. How he would eat home cooking all on his own, and breathe until he found the right words for himself or for her.

When you offered him your hand, over the middle console, he took it without hesitation. It was soft and fit into his like it was meant to be, and he was reminded again how in awe he was of you. This was by no means what you had agreed to, not normal under any circumstances, but you were trusting him, rolling with it like he was worth it. 

He wanted to be, wanted all of this so bad he could hardly breathe. 

The rest of his story left almost no time for him to prep you, but when the door to the little mobile home opened, his mama greeted you like she knew you were coming.

You were lovely stepping into his truck with your hand in his, and you were lovely across from him with green chili sliding down your chin as you flushed, but this... was something else. It hit him full force, that you had listened and learned and stayed. With Tom hitting on you, with the mess at the party they shouldn’t have been at, with all of the shit in their pasts, and even this. You were really here, at his mother’s home, kissing her cheek and letting her call you his novia and accepting all of his life, all of him. 

His madre only hugged him after you, and her beam brightened as she watched you follow him, in slipping off your shoes. Every time he saw her, he thought she looked a little smaller - you’re just growing, mi frijol -  but she looked small next to you, too. Her voice was extra high as she cooed, ushering you into the cluttered mobile home, and he could help but smile as he followed, too in love with the moment to be embarrassed of her questions. 

You had listened closely, sympathetic but surprisingly determined not to be pushed away. This felt like simply an extension of that awkward and beautiful dinner, the way his mother welcomed you with open arms and rapid fire questions about yourself. She mercifully left out pushy questions about your relationship as you settled into the paisley couch, and Frankie was as warm and solid against your side as he had ever been.

There were little wrinkles around his eyes as he watched you and her, and as you began asking her questions about herself, he was more sure about you than he had ever been. It wasn’t gone completely, the feeling that this was ridiculous and he’d ruined whatever you had by going unreasonably fast with you, but he did his best to ignore it. Instead he focused on you, something he was learning was good luck.

His heart ached when you fit into his side, practically in his lap as you used him to ground yourself. It felt natural, in an intoxicating way, and he wanted you. Just like this.

When his madre thought she heard a knock and went to check, he found himself rubbing the top of your head with his jaw, his cheek, his nose. The whole night felt like it wasn’t real.

“Thank you for rolling with this,” he whispered into your hair. Your shoulder moved up and down again on his chest – a shrug.

“You’ve already met James, it’s almost the same,” you shifted to smile at him, nad he shook his head before noticing your eyes flit behind him.

At the door was a woman, dark stains under her eyes, belly stretching out the thin fabric of her shirt, and eyebrows drawn together.

His sister.

Then his mother came in pushing glasses of tea into your hands, almost as cool as the introduction, and you settled back against Frankie. Your life had become so strange these past few weeks, but you had known for what felt like a long time now. Together, it would be okay.

-

The drive home was dark, and silent for a long moment as you collected yourself, and Frankie was glad the evening started early.

“So this was a long date,” Frankie said, a question and an apology. You huffed in laughter and he offered his hand to you, saying your name with adoration, imploring you to talk to him.

“It was a lot,” you said, honestly, but you took his hand, thankful for the openness.

“Yeah,” his voice cracked, and you could see him struggling not to watch you anxiously. “I didn't plan on taking you home and all that happening, plus my mom calling you my- ”

“I know, Francisco,”

“Fuck. Do you… do you have any questions? Or…” he was beginning to panic, the undercurrent of anxiety finally uncontrollable.

His sister had been short with you, as much as she’d been with him these past few months. It was a lot, so much more than you deserved.

“Do you regret it?” It was an honest question.

Frankie’s mouth opened a little bit, his eyes suddenly steady on the road, really thinking. Then he shook his head, and a knot you didn’t know you had undid itself in your chest. He used his hand to draw yours to his mouth, ghost kisses over your knuckles, mustache only tickling a little bit. “I want you to be a part of my life, querida.” 

The truck hit a bump, and you felt pressure, and then like you were floating. You nodded, trying to find the words to tell him you wanted that, too. 

Finally, you said, “Thank you for letting me,” and he laughed. It was rich and deep and full of relief, almost giddy as it broke the tension, and you laughed too. He let your hands drop back between you, but didn’t let go, squeezing gently.

 The words unsaid didn’t really seem to matter, as he cruised five under the speed limit towards your home. 

 When you asked, “Why do you still go to those parties?” it was the last thing he has been expecting. The rush of wind by the widows felt loud as he thought.

“I guess… sometimes it feels like I’ve got nothing better to do.” It sounded lame, even to him. That wasn’t all of it, it was more complicated than that, but you understood. After this whole time, you’d stuck around, of course you did.

“What about next time, instead…” The stars were twinkling, winking at you, “You go on another date with me?”

“You still want to?” Frankie had hoped, really hoped, but hearing you offer was something different. Fire in his chest, hot and bright and powerful. When he looked over, you were nodding, smiling at him with a certainty on your face that matched his own. 

“There’s a game tomorrow,” he was half joking.

You laughed. 

“Okay.”

He pulled over under a streetlight to kiss you. 

<<

translations:

madre - mother

novia - girlfriend 

mi frijol - my bean

taglist:

@fangirl-316 @scribbledghost @writeforfandoms @beautyagegoodnesssize @princess76179 @mrsbentallmadge

hey batter batter taglist:

@icanbeyourjedi @studyofawearymind @hnt-escape @athalien @the-witty-pen-name @daffodin @sarahjkl82-blog @pintsizemama @anaaaispunk @pjkimrn @dobbyjen

[wiypt-writes]

Stark Spangled Banner

Ch30: Winter Is Here

Summary: In the wake of the UN Bombing, Steve, Katie and Sam (with help from Sharon) track Bucky to Bucharest and face a race against time to track him down before the CTU. But someone else is also following Bucky, someone who’s been one step ahead and the consequences are disastrous.

Warnings: Bad Language words.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N: Elements of this have been reworked/rewritten…for reasons which will become apparent at some point!

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Chapter 29 Part 2

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Bucky liked Bucharest. It was easy enough to blend in and he’d found work at a local Warehouse easily enough. It was no questions asked, cash in hand and no trail. Perfect. Physical labour didn’t bother him, neither did taking the nightshifts which no one else seemed to want. It meant he could sleep most of the days and emerge later at night meaning he had even less people to encounter and deal with. Not that it really mattered, no one really bothered him apart from the Old Lady that lived a few floors down. Bucky often did odd jobs for her, just like he had used to for the old couple that lived across from his parents in Brooklyn before the war.

Since arriving in Europe in September last year, his life had been pretty peaceful. His memories had started to flash back almost the instant he wasn’t re-wiped by HYDRA, but they were random, non-chronological, so he had started writing them in a notebook along with other snippets and facts he found along the way which helped him piece together the parts of the puzzle that was his life. He knew his name, his date of birth, who his parents were, his siblings, Steve- his brother-from-another-Mother, the Howling Commandos, Steve’s wife- Katie,  his ‘death’ and then… well, that bit he tried not to remember on purpose.

He felt better, like himself, and had on more than one occasion thought about reaching out to Steve. But the thing was, even though he’d now been out of HYDRA control for over two years, he knew that what they had done to him or put in his head was still there, and he didn’t want to give anyone the chance to find out the hard-way or give them chance to lock him up like some lab rat. So he had decided it was best to stay off radar.

Pulling his cap down a little, he headed over to his favourite fruit store for some plums. He remembered what a treat they had been back before the war, and he enjoyed the fact they were so readily available now. He reached out with his flesh hand to gently test one. 

“How are they? Are they good?” He asked the vendor in Romanian who nodded to him, smiling “Okay. Give me six, thank you”

With his bag of fruit he walked along, casually scanning around as he ate. And then, across the street, he spotted a vendor at a news-stand watching him. Bucky glanced away hastily then looked back at the man who was still watching him before he suddenly turned and ran from his kiosk. With a sick feeling in his stomach,  Bucky made his way over and picked up a paper reading the front page which contained a number of surveillance-photos and the head line: ‘Winter Soldier cautat pentru Bombardmentul din Viena’. 

A cold feeling washed all over him and he glanced around, swallowing thickly. 

He might have struggled with his memory in the past but he could categorically say this wasn’t one of those times. This wasn’t him, granted it looked like him, but it wasn’t.

Shit, he needed to hide.

Pulling his cap down further, jacket pulled up round his neck he set off home.

****** Having your own private plane certainly has its perks. Katie, Sam and Steve made their way to Vienna and from there, after being given a lead from Sharon, they headed to Bucharest. Steve and Sam had brought all their equipment whereas Katie had opted to simply pack her cat suit and utility belt as they weren’t anticipating any action.

A decision she was starting to regret now.

“Nice place.” Katie commented sarcastically, pulling at the neck of her leather cat-suit as they entered the old rundown apartment that Bucky Barnes now called home. Steve ignored the comment before he carefully closed the door behind them. The two of them ventured further into the small darkened apartment, the windows had been taped over with old newspapers keeping out most of the sunlight and prying eyes. Steve’s shield caught a few of the spots of light which were creeping through tears and gaps in the paper, sending reflections onto bits of the apartment walls. The bedroom and the living area were one, a tattered mattress placed just beneath the window a small desk and lamp next to it. Across from the bed near the entrance was a metal table with two chairs next to it, then there was the kitchen area and a door, which Katie headed through, gun at the ready, finding nothing but a small, grimy and empty bathroom.

She couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of sadness in her gut that the man who had saved her life, a war veteran, was living like this.

Steve took to looking around the kitchen and had found a notebook of sorts with tabs of varying colours sticking out from amongst the pages. As he flicked through he found a leaflet on the Smithsonian Captain America exhibit.

"Heads up guys, German Special Forces approaching from the South.” Sam’s voice came through the coms.

“Understood.” Steve replied gently, replacing the leaflet in the page he had found it, fingers lingering on the paper. He looked up at Katie as she re-entered the room.

“Nobody’s home.” She said softly. “What you got there?” “It’s a journal.” Steve said, “He’s been writing down memories and-“

He stopped dead as a movement crossed his peripheral and his head jerked up. Over his wife’s shoulder he locked eyes with Bucky for the first time since that day over the Potomac. Katie, noticing his demeanour, glanced over her shoulder and instantly spun round to see Bucky watching the pair of them with a cautious sort of curiosity.

“Do you know me?” Steve asked carefully, setting the book he was flipping through down on the cluttered counter. He moved in front of Katie slightly, keeping himself between her and his best friend who was stood stock still, eyeing them up.

“You’re Steve,” Bucky said roughly, “I read about you in a museum.”  He added immediately, nodding to himself. 

Play dumb, Bucky, play dumb…

“They’ve set the perimeter.” Sam spoke in their ears.

“I know you’re nervous, and you’ve got plenty of reason to be, but you’re lying.” Steve spoke calmly, not believing him for a second. He could always tell when Bucky was lying, even as kids he wouldn’t look you in the eye fully, and now wasn’t any different.

“I wasn’t in Vienna. I don’t do that anymore.”  Bucky’s voice wavered slightly, almost pleading with them to believe him. And instantly Katie did.

“They’re entering the building. “ Sam urged. 

“Well, the people who think you did are coming here now.” Katie took a small step forward so that she was slightly in front of Steve. “And they’re not planning on taking you alive.”

 “That’s smart. Good strategy.” He looked at her, cocking his head to one side as he studied her. She was oozing confidence, are far cry from the broken, shattered woman he had rescued last year, and she didn’t seem afraid of him. Which he liked but also didn’t because it meant they weren’t going to just let him slip away.

“They’re on the roof. I’m compromised!”

“This doesn’t have to end in a fight ,Buck.” Steve pleaded desperately while Bucky simply walked over to the table set down his plastic bag and pulled off his glove to reveal his metal hand.

“It always ends in a fight.” He said balling the metal into a fist, his voice lilted with sadness.

“Five seconds.”

“You pulled me from the river and you saved Katie’s life that day in La Ronde.” Steve’s voice took on an urgent tone, almost shouting. “Why?”

“I don’t know.” Bucky replied in frustration finally looking up at Steve and locking eyes with him before he glanced to Katie. Truth be told he did know. That day on the Potomac something had broken his programming, and when Steve had plunged to the river he had known he had to save him, because he had been saving him all his punk-assed life. And then with Katie, well, even before he had recognised her he couldn’t leave a dame to the mercy of HYDRA, not after what they did to him. It was wrong…his ma taught him better.

“Three seconds.”

“Yes you do.” Steve responded,

“Breach, breach, breach!” Came the yell into their earpieces.

Both Steve and Katie looked towards the window prompting Bucky to do the same and in the next second a flash bomb was thrown through, Steve batted it right back out with his shield and then a second bomb came through the other window. Bucky booted it towards Steve who dropped and covered it with his shield, containing the blast. All three of them looked at one another for a split second before a loud bang sounded as the door rattled. Katie quickly kicked the edge of the table so that it wedged between the door and the wall blocking the German Forces entrance for now.

Whilst she was distracted with that, a final bomb was thrown and Bucky lifted up the dirty mattress using it as protection for them both. She nodded to him gently as he tossed it away and then came the soldiers on zip lines through the window. The first landed in the kitchen, training his gun first on Steve, then across towards Bucky, but before he could shoot Steve pulled the rug from beneath him and he ended up firing into the ceiling. The next came in through the window right next to Bucky but he punched him in the face, throwing him over to Katie who aimed a kick at his arm, knocking the gun out of it before kicking him again in the chest, sending him sprawling into the bathroom. Bucky picked the third soldier up easily and slammed him into the wall, letting him fall down.

“Buck, stop! You’re gonna kill someone.” Steve ran forward, but Bucky easily dodged him and slammed into him from behind, knocking him to the floor.

“I’m not gonna kill anyone!” He growled, punching a hole into the floor. He grabbed a backpack from under the floorboards and threw it across the room and out of the window. Then came more gun fire and Katie dropped to the floor, rolling to her right and firing a shot in the direction of the shooting hearing a yell as her bullet hit her target in the knee. Steve, again, flung his shield up and Bucky shoved him hard in the back sending him flying into another solider, taking him down. Katie scrambled to her feet again unable to do anything but watch as Bucky punched a hole through the wall next to the door before bashing it open and continuing to fight his way out.

“You alright?” Steve asked, as she dusted herself off.

“This isn’t exactly going to plan is it?” She shook her head as they ran out of the door just in time to see Bucky jump on a soldier who was descending from a zip wire and swinging down a level in the stairwell of the apartment block. One of the soldiers was screaming into his radio. Steve grabbed it from him, then smashed it with his foot before he jumped down a level after Bucky. Katie, took the sensible option and ran down the stairs, taking out anyone blocking her way.

Bucky was punching soldiers left and right until he ducked as he hit another accidentally sending him over the railing, but Steve was quick to catch him by his vest.

“Come on man,” He sighed wearily. Bucky’s only response was a shrug which he emphasized by elbowing a soldier that was behind him, while Steve pulled up the one he was holding onto and tossed him into a wall. Bucky jumped over the railing down several flights but by the time Steve caught up with him he had dodged into an apartment and jumped from the railings

“Damned it!” Steve cursed as he watched Bucky land on the lower roof of the neighbouring building with some force, but he simply rolled as if the fall hadn’t bothered him at all, picked up his backpack and ran.  But he didn’t get far, a muscular man clad entirely in black slammed into him from behind knocking him down.

“Sam southwest rooftop.” Steve suddenly reported to Sam as he watched the man in the black suit, which looked very much like a big cat moved with breath-taking agility and grace, slashing with sharp claws on each hand as he tackled Bucky.

“Who the hell’s the other guy?” Sam asked Steve on the coms.  

“I’m about to find out.” Steve backed up before he too launched himself from the balcony down onto the neighbouring building. Katie ran into the apartment just in time to see him land on the other roof-top and she frowned at the mystery man in some form of cat suit who was lunging at Bucky with his claws. Bucky grabbed his wrists holding him off but at that moment a helicopter that had appeared began to fire its machine gun. Both Katie from her vantage point, and Steve who was bolting towards the men, frowned as he saw the ammo ping back off the man’s suit just like it did off his shield.

“Sam…” Katie said as Steve continued to run towards Bucky, shield raised. Sam understood what she was implying instantly.  

“Got him.” He replied, flying down he spun under the chopper, grabbing the rails at the bottom, spinning it off course before swooping off. As Katie continued to watch Bucky leapt off the side of the roof to the floor, and the mystery cat man followed using his claws for traction down the side of the building. Steve was shortly behind, rolling along the floor before picking himself up and running after the pair of them, Sam flying behind. Then, the helicopter began to follow, gunfire tearing up the side walk.  

“Shit.” Katie ran down and emerging into the street, sprinting as fast as she could. Spotting an abandoned motorbike which had been ditched in the fracas she hopped on and sped after them, mentally thanking Natasha for the bike driving lessons.

It was chaos, absolute chaos. Bucky jumped down through a gap into the underpass, Steve and the mystery cat man following, as they themselves were being pursued by an armoured vehicle. Well, at least they were until Steve managed to pull the driver out and take the vehicle himself. He saw a motorbike coming up behind him in the mirrors and did a double take as he saw it was Katie. She pulled up alongside him and with one hand she grabbed the passenger door and yanked it open, before placing both her hands on the rim of the door and using it as leverage to swing herself feet first into the car.

“Where did you learn to do that?” Steve asked, open mouthed as she dropped into the seat next to him.

“Nat.” She shrugged, as if it was a perfectly normal thing to do or be taught. Steve gave a small smirk and then turned to look back at the road, switching lanes and cruising past mystery cat man.  Then there was a thud and Katie glanced back over her shoulders. Mystery cat man had latched himself onto the back of the car.

“Hold on!” Steve yelled before swerving the car to the right then the left hoping to dislodge him but no such luck. He even rammed the side of the car into another Special Forces vehicle but nothing, he hung tight.

“Sam we can’t shake this guy.” Steve reported.

“Right behind you.”

In front of them Bucky jumped the barrier to the other side of the road so Steve dropped the car a gear and pressed harder on the gas, breaking straight through it. A quick glance through the mirrors told Katie that it was enough to slow down the Germans but not to dislodge their passenger.

“This guy is more of a pain in the ass than Tony.” Katie sighed, turning back to look out of the front. Just as she did, Bucky clearly decided he needed his own mode of transportation and grabbed the handle bars of a motorbike which was speeding towards him. He dislodged the driver in mid-air while the bike spun and threw his leg over the seat all in one fluid motion. He then landed and sped away.

“Holy shit!” Katie let out a small laugh of disbelief, her jaw dropping slightly as she smirked at Bucky’s unbelievable display of acrobatics. “Did you see that?”

Steve looked at her for a split second, taking in the smirk on her face as she admired Bucky’s agility, surprised to feel he was slightly jealous. With a sigh, more at himself than anything, he shook his head. That insecure little kid from Brooklyn really had picked the most inappropriate time to appear. It didn’t help when she spoke again, a cheeky lilt to her voice.

“Can you do that?”

Steve shot her a glare that would make anyone else shake in their boots but it made Katie do nothing but frown at the open display of hostility he very rarely used on her. Before she could respond, however, there was a thud on the roof as mystery cat man climbed on top of the car and then launched himself at Bucky. The soldier on the bike was prepared though, and grabbed him around the throat, flinging him over his head. But the mystery cat man was persistent, hanging on even as the bike tipped and Bucky was forced to use his metal hand so that he didn’t fall off the bike completely. He kicked the cat man away before straightening his bike and speeding ahead.

Steve swerved to avoid running mystery cat man over while he caught other means of transportation, meaning he grabbed onto Sam’s legs as he was flying by. Ahead of them Bucky threw a sticky bomb at the top of the overpass which immediately went off and began raining down debris.  

“Time to go.” Steve grabbed Katie as he slammed on the breaks turning the car sharply. He pulled her out of the door, using his shield to land on as the car began to tilt on its side. They dodged through the rubble, Steve’s shield over their heads and once they were clear, Steve sped off to where the cat man was mounted on top of Bucky ready to rip his throat out.

Sam emerged from the dust but seconds later there was loud clang and War Machine landed holding up his hand with repulsor beams at the ready in warning. More German Special Forces arrived and they knew the game was up. But Steve and Katie both looked at each other, chests heaving with exertion and dare they say it, relief. They had located Bucky after years of searching, he was still alive and could be questioned, which meant there was a chance they could clear all this up.

Steve felt Bucky step forward, and he instantly held his arm out to stop him. .

“Stand down now.” Rhodey spoke with authority and the Special Forces aimed their guns at them all. Steve relented placing his shield onto his back harness showing compliance as he held his hands up, palms outwards.

“Congratulations Cap, you’re a criminal.” Rhodey said sarcastically. As soldiers surrounded Bucky forcing him down to his knees so they could hand cuff him tightly.

Katie and Sam raised their hands in surrender as the soldiers approached them too. The mystery cat man was the last to comply retracting his claws and reaching up to his helmet.

“Call them off Rhodey.” Katie looked at him, nodding to the soldier who had his gun trained on her “We’ll come quietly.”

Rhodey turned to look at her and then nodded at the officer, who lowered his gun, but that didn’t stop them from handcuffing her. As she shot a look over her shoulder at the man who was slapping on the restraints she gave him a small smirk and then turned back to look at mystery cat man, just as he pulled off his mask.

“What the…” Katie frowned, recognising him instantly. It was T’Challa, the prince of Wakanda.

“Your highness.” Rhodey said.

There was a scuffle to Katie’s right and she turned to see that Bucky was being hauled to the floor.

“Don’t hurt him.” She turned to Rhodey, pleading with him. “Please. He saved my life, he’s still a human being!”

Rhodey hesitated slightly but then one of the soldiers shoved Katie in the back.

“Move.” he said in a thick accent.

“Say please.” She spun round, glaring at him. “Fucking asshole.”

“Katie.” Steve instructed gently as he walked towards her, being marched by two other soldiers. She turned to him and he gave a small shake of his head, warning her not to start another fight, before he nodded towards the black SUV.

“You know what the worse bit about all this is?” Katie sighed, as she fell into step beside Steve.

Steve looked at her, “No, what?”

“The lecture I’m going to get off Tony.”

One they had been stripped of their weapons and gear they were released from their handcuffs. Rubbing her wrists, Katie raised an eyebrow at Rhodey.

“Now what?” 

“You’ll be given chance to change and clean up before going to Berlin,” Rhodey said, as the side of the SUV they were by opened and they were instructed to climb in. “Where you’ll be put into the custody of the Anti-Terrorism Unit.”

“So we’re terrorists now?” Katie snorted.

“You knew what would happen if you went against the law.”

She gave a sarcastic, fake yawn and behind her Sam sniggered before he looked at Rhodey

“This make you feel good?” Sam asked.

“Okay, enough!” Steve loudly shut down the petty squabble that was about to erupt between the two men “Yes, Rhodey we knew what would happen, but we also knew what would happen if we didn’t.”

“Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

“That you would never have taken him alive.” He nodded to where Bucky was being hauled into the back of a separate vehicle. “And you know that too.”

******

“So you like cats?”

“Sam.” Steve scolded as Katie snorted, looking out of the window of the SUV as they drove over a bridge that crossed the River Spree. T’Challa was on the front row of the SUV alone, then Steve and Katie had sat on the middle, Sam on the back row.

“What?” Sam asked innocently. “Dude shows up dressed like a cat and you don’t wanna’ know more?”

Katie was inclined to agree, Steve however, was curious about something else.

“Your suit. It’s Vibranium?” He asked in interest.

“The Black Panther has been the protector of Wakanda for generations.” T'Challa began slowly. “A mantle passed from warrior to warrior. And now because your friend murdered my father, I also wear the mantle of king. So I ask you, as both warrior and king, how long do you think you can keep your friend safe from me?”

T'Challa turned his head to look Steve directly in the eye then turned back around without another word as Steve clenched his jaw.

They arrived at the CIA base in Berlin in record time thanks to the police convey that kept the streets clear. The base was crawling with heavily armed soldiers as they stepped out of the van and were led inside. Katie shrugged on her leather jacket, pausing as Bucky’s cage followed them being moved by a small forklift. Besides her Steve stiffened as he looked over at Bucky and Katie gently placed her hand on at the bottom of his back. Bucky looked at the pair of them before he turned away as he was taken off in a separate direction.

After an introduction of sorts to Thaddeus Ross (Sharon’s boss) they were informed their weapons would be placed in a lock up, prompting Sam to snarl angrily- “I better not look out the window and see anybody flying around in that.” They were then led over a walkway and Katie looked past Ross and saw a familiar redhead walking towards them. Natasha’s face was blank as she strode down the walkway.

“For the record.” She snapped as she looked at the three of them in turn before she focussed on Steve. “This is what making things worse looks like.”

“He’s alive.” Steve answered shortly, not looking at her as he walked past, his jacket flapping slightly, pulling Katie with him as his hand wrapped around hers.

Natasha just glared at him before she walked quicker, pulling ahead of the group as they reached a large security office. Natasha led the way in, and Katie instantly picked up as she could hear Tony’s voice from inside,

“The remaining of us are now at court-section.” He was saying. And as they entered she saw her brother standing in the centre of the office, talking into his phone with his back to the door as he added, “And, Colonel Ross is supervising the clean-up.”

Despite everything Katie felt a rush of relief, it good to see him, alive and okay after Vienna.

“Try not to break anything while we fix this.” Natasha snapped and Katie’s attention then turned from her brother to her friend and she shook her head.

“Ass kissing doesn’t suit you, Nat.”  

Tony turned to face them all, his face set in a deep frown as he barked into his phone, pulling at his tie to loosen it off. "Consequences? You bet there will be consequences.”

Steve raised his eyebrows slightly, glancing at Katie who rolled her eyes before she looked at Tony as he continued to talk “Obviously you can quote me on that because I just said it. Anything else? Thank you, sir.”

As he placed his phone back into his pocket, his eyes never left his sister. “You okay?” He asked and she nodded, stepping forwards into his arms, giving him a hug which he returned.

"Consequences?” Steve repeated with a smirk as Tony looked over Katie’s shoulder at him.

“Secretary Ross wants you three prosecuted.” Tony answered, stepping back and releasing Katie. “I had to give him something.” He added.

“I’m not getting that shield back, am I?” Steve asked in an almost monotone voice.

“Technically, it’s the government’s property.” Natasha replied cheerily. “Wings too.” She added.

“That’s cold.” Sam countered

“Warmer than jail.” Tony tossed over his shoulder, as he headed off somewhere.

“Stop being so melodramatic.” Katie rolled her eyes, and stuck her hands in the back pockets of her jeans as Natasha led them to an office, talking to them as she went, telling them about what had been going on. They walked in silence, none of them responding. Eventually they reached a glass walled office and stepped inside.

“You’re not in a very talkative mood I can see.” Natasha drawled as Katie dropped her jacket over the back of a chair.

“Hmmm what can we talk about? Let’s see.” Katie looked at her, her face angry. “Oh how about the Accords?” Natasha rolled her eyes as Katie continued with a tone of disdain. “You know, I never had you down as someone that would give in so easily to control.”

“Well sometimes we have to make some tough choices.”

“Why’d you really sign, Nat?“ Steve asked her.

She sighed leaning back on the door frame. “Loyalty. Loyalty to our team. Staying together is more important than how we stay together.”

Steve shook his head, giving a small snort of laughter. “I don’t agree, and deep down, I don’t think you do either.”

“Believe what you want.” She shrugged before leaving.

About half an hour later after the three of them had been brainstorming again who they thought was actually responsible for bombing the UN and trying to fit Bucky up (none of them having any sensible ideas whatsoever), Sam excused himself heading off in search of some food and drink and it wasn’t long before Tony walked into the office were Katie and Steve were sat, Katie’s feet resting in Steve’s lap, his hand sliding up the bottom of her jeans, stroking the smooth skin just above the line of her ankle boots.

“You wanna see something cool?” He asked. Katie and Steve both turned to look at him as he walked in, holding a small black case. “I pulled something from Dad’s archives.” He nodded, “Timely.”

Katie sat up as Tony tossed his suit jacket onto one of the empty seats before he opened the box and placed it down on the shiny, mahogany table in front of Steve.

"FDR signed the Land-Lease bills with these in 1941.” Tony explained what they were. “Provided support to the allies when they needed it the most.”

“Some would say it brought our country closer to war.” Steve countered, a humourless smile on his face as he looked back up at Tony.

Tony met Steve’s eyes evenly and countered with his own point, “See, if not for these, you wouldn’t be here.” Steve’s brow rose, while Tony continued, “I’m trying to, what do you call it? An olive branch. Is that what you call it?

He looked at Steve, leaning his face against his fist as he waited expectantly. Steve pursed his lips unhappily and Katie knew he was struggling and couldn’t tell Tony what he wanted to hear because he didn’t believe in it.

"Is Pepper here?” Katie asked, switching topics as she glanced around the office then added, “I didn’t see her.”

She looked back at Tony as a strange almost regretful look came over his face. Her brows furrowed in confusion as Tony said slowly, measured, “We are… kinda, well not kinda-”

“Pregnant?” Steve interrupted in surprise.

“No, definitely not.” Tony said immediately face souring slightly. He paused, before finally admitting the truth, “We’re taking a break. It’s nobody’s fault.”

“I’m so sorry, Tony.” Steve spoke softly as Katie looked at her brother, who took a seat at the table “I didn’t know.”

“What did you do this time?” Katie asked gently. She hated it when they rowed and broke up. It never lasted long but still…

Tony’s lips twitched like he was going to smile but didn’t, “Few years ago, I almost lost her, so I trashed all my suits. Then, we had to mop up HYDRA. And then Ultron,” he tapped himself in the chest, “my fault.” He sighed again. “And then, and then, and then- I never stopped. Cause the truth is, I don’t wanna stop but I don’t want to lose her. I thought maybe the Accords could split the difference.”

“In her defence, you are a handful.” Katie said, the corner of her mouth twitching upwards.

Tony smiled without it reaching his eyes as he stuffed his hands into his pockets, pacing a little by the glass walls, before he reached up to adjust his tie as he continued bitterly.

“Yet, dad was a pain in the ass, but he and mom always made it work.”

“You know, I never expected Howard would get married.” Steve said, fondly remembering his friend with a smile “Mind you, I only knew him when he was young and single.”

“Oh really?” Tony asked sarcastically as he looked back at Steve. “You two knew each other? He never mentioned that. Maybe only a thousand times.”

Steve winced, dropping his head and while Tony picked up his suit jacket. “God, I hated you.” He spat pulling the jacket on.

“That’s a dick thing to say, Tone!” Katie frowned, narrowing her eyes at her brother.  

Steve sighed, and he looked back at Tony with sad eyes, “I don’t mean to make things difficult.”

“No, you just dropped into my life and married my sister.” Tony snorted “But you’re a very polite person. I mean you asked first.”

“That’s enough.” Katie chastised as Tony walked behind Steve, pacing a little. Steve turned to keep his eyes on him as he sighed

“If I see a situation pointed south, I can’t ignore it. Sometime I wish I could.”

“No, you don’t.” Tony challenged

Steve paused, before he admitted with a small, wry smile shaking his head a little, “No, I don’t.” He sighed, “Sometimes-”

“Sometimes I wanna punch you in your perfect teeth.” Tony interrupted bitterly. He shrugged like it was a fact, before he added softly, “but I don’t wanna see you gone. We need you, Cap.”

Steve stared at Tony as he considered his words, Katie observing the two of them silently as Tony continued “So far, nothing’s happened that can’t be undone, if you just sign.” He gestured at the pens, “We can make the last twenty-four hours legit. Barnes gets transferred to an American psych centre instead of a Wakanda prison.”

Steve stared at the pens, weighing Tony’s words before he reached out, pulling one slowly from its holder. Tony folded his arms across his chest as Steve stood up playing with the pen in his hands.

“I’m not saying it’s impossible,” he took a deep breath, “but there would have to be safeguards, what do you think, Sweetheart?” He looked at Katie. He was trying here, after everything, to reach the middle ground. He didn’t want to see the Avengers split up and the opportunity of keeping Bucky out of jail and safe was one he couldn’t pass up.

Katie looked at him, searching his face. She hadn’t been completely opposed to some form of sanctions after all, what she had opposed vehemently was a set being force upon them which gave them no control. But maybe, as Steve pointed out, with some amendments, perhaps they could make this work.

“We need to be able to have some control Tony, a say in where we go, when we go and why we go.” Katie eventually looked at her brother. “We’re not to be used as some pawns in a political game, for anyone’s agenda.”

“Sure.” Tony was quick to assure. “Once we put out the PR fire, its documents, they can be amended.” Tony sat back down at the table “I’d file a motion to have you and Wanda reinstated and-.“

"Wanda?” Katie cut him off and looked at him. “What about Wanda?”

“She’s fine.” Tony promised, although wariness leaked into his tone because he knew he had just put his foot in it. “She’s confined in the compound currently. Vision’s keeping her company.”

“Oh God, Tony!” Katie groaned and threw her head backwards in exasperation and disbelief.

At the same time Steve scoffed and shook his head. “Every time. Every time I think you’re seeing things the right way-”

"What?” Tony cut in, “It’s a hundred acres with a lap pool. It’s got a screening room. Trust me, there’s worse ways to protect people.”

“Protection?” Steve repeated, his temper rising. “Is that how you see this? This is protection? It’s internment.”

“She’s not a US citizen-” Tony spoke loudly while Steve and Katie groaned again

“Oh, come on, Tony!”  Katie shook her head, looking at him.

“- and they don’t grant visas to Weapons of Mass Destruction.” Tony finished taking a deep breath

“Wanda’s a kid!” Steve spat out.

“Give me a break!” Tony shouted back angrily.

Katie’s eyes narrowed furiously, but Tony took another deep breath as he visibly tried to calm himself down,

“I’m doing what has to be done,” He paused to look Steve in the eye before he turned to his sister and finished flatly. “To stave off something worse.”

She shook her head and grit her teeth, there was no discussing with him when he was like this, and if he couldn’t see that keeping Wanda on house arrest because she hadn’t signed was wrong then she didn’t really want to discuss it with him anyway.  "You keep telling yourself that.” She answered.

"Hate to break up the set.” Steve dropped the pen back down onto the desk before he left the office.

Katie groaned and banged her head on the desk.

“Kiddo…”

“Just don’t.” She replied, not looking up. “Don’t say a word Tony, you’ve already said enough.”

****

“The receipt for your gear.”  Sharon walked into the room, handing Sam a piece of paper.

Sam took the paper, glancing down at it. “'Bird costume’? Come on, girl.” He spat incredulously reading the receipt.

“I didn’t write it.” Sharon shot back and Katie raised a brow as she watched the woman, noticing her movements, before she reached past Sam and pressed a button in the middle of the conference table. Instantly the audio from the footage they were watching of Bucky’s questioning flooded the room and Steve looked at Sharon in surprise and she nodded back to him. Katie also gave her a look of appreciation as well and Sharon averted her eyes beyond the conference room. Katie followed her gaze and saw Natasha looking furtively over her shoulder. Katie nodded to Nat, understanding instantly she’d had a hand in this. Nat inclined her head slightly before she turned back around to watch her own set of screens.

“I’m not here to judge you. I just want to ask you a few questions. Do you know where you are, James?” The man in the cage gave no response so the doctor tried again. “I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me, James.”

“My name is Bucky.” Bucky answered voice rough, a hint of defiance in his tone.

Steve’s lips pursed, and he turned back to the table with a frown. He picked up the discarded file, pulling out the Vienna security camera photos that showed the man the task force identified as Bucky from near the bomb site.

“Why would the task force release this photo to begin with?” Steve asked handing the picture over to Katie, as she perched on the table beside him.

Sam frowned, while Sharon shrugged and answered the best way she could, “Get the word out, involve as many eyes as we can?”

“Right.” Steve said flatly nodding but it wasn’t enough for him. Katie cottoned on instantly.

“It’s a good way to flush a guy out of hiding. Set off a bomb, get your picture taken.” She shrugged and Sam’s eyes narrowed as he leaned forward on his arms, while Steve continued for her.

“Suddenly you’ve got seven billion people looking for the Winter Soldier.”

“You’re saying someone framed him to find him.” Sharon asked slowly, summarizing their point.

“Steve, we looked for the guy for two years, and bar when he pulled your Missus out of that Hydra base, we found nothing.” Sam pointed out.

“We didn’t bomb the UN.” Katie answered. “That turns a lot of heads.”

“Yeah.” Sharon joined in quietly, “but that doesn’t guarantee that whoever framed him would get him, it guarantees that we would…”

She trailed off as all 4 of them shared an understanding glance.

Steve turned around sharply to look back at the screen showing Bucky and the UN psychiatrist, before he muttered "Yeah.” Someone had brought him here for a reason. Who, and why?

“Tell me Bucky.” The man interrogating Bucky continued on. “You’ve seen a great deal, haven’t you?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Bucky answered flatly keeping his response short.

“You feel that, if you open your mouth, the horrors might never stop. Don’t worry.” He tapped at his screen “We only have to talk about one.”

The building suddenly went dark, the power going out leaving on the emergency red lights flashing ominously. Katie hopped off the table and Steve turned urgent eyes on Sharon.

“Sub-level five, east wing.” She answered the silent question quickly.

Steve looked at Sam and he nodded then the three of them ran out of the office, using the distraction of the power outage to their advantage as they raced down the stairs to get to the level Bucky was on.

They ran down two flights of stairs before they finally reached the hallway that led to Bucky’s holding room. Steve stopped when they reached the last corridor and spotted the guards lying on the ground. He glanced back to exchange looks with Katie and Sam as they both came to a stop behind him. Now wary of what they were walking into, and highly conscious that none of them had any weapons, they made their way cautiously down the corridor. Katie bent down to check the fallen soldiers. One had a strong pulse, the other…

“He’s dead.” She muttered looking up. Steve let out a sigh of frustration and moved into the security room besides the cell, Sam and Katie close behind.  

The further into the room they went the more dead soldiers they encountered when a sudden raspy voice came from in the room that held Bucky’s containment unit. “Help me.”

Steve looked ahead to see the man who had been interrogating Bucky, lying on his side by the empty cage, clutching his side as if in pain. Steve stomped into the room angrily, ignoring the man as he begged for help again.

“Get up.” He snapped reaching down to grab the man by the front of his jacket, hauling him to his feet. The man eyed him carefully as Steve glared shoving him into a wall and snarling. “Who are you? What do you want?”

The man met his gaze, his eyes becoming cold and dark as answered lowly, “To see an empire fall.”

A movement in the corner of the room caught Katie’s eye. Sam and her ducked just in time as the Winter Soldier leapt from where he had been lurking in the shadows, throwing a punch towards Katie. He missed, hitting the concrete doorway and punching a hole through the rock.

Sam acted quickly, punching at the Winter Soldier’s side, but it didn’t even faze the super-solider as he punched Sam straight in the stomach. Sam winced, and doubled over as the Winter Soldier grabbed his chin in his metal hand, throwing him across the room. He then turned his attention to Katie, and she knew that throwing punches wasn’t going to work so all she could do was duck, using her agility to keep out of his way. She bent backwards as he made to grab her but then Steve ran at him, ducking as the Winter Soldier swung his arm out. Once the metal arm passed over his head, Steve threw a punch of his own, hitting the Soldier right in the face, and the man snarled as he swung his fist back at Steve, who dodged it. The Winter Soldier suddenly kicked out, landing a solid kick right to Steve’s stomach and Steve grunted as he was thrown backwards, landing in the security room.

The Winter Soldier strode towards him but Steve was already back on his feet and blocked the next kick with his bare hands. Katie was powerless to help; she had nothing on her, no stingers, no guns no Supernova suit. She frantically searched the room for something she could use as a weapon as the pair of super soldiers continued to fight, throwing kicks and punches while parrying and blocking the other’s moves, heading back out into the corridor. As Steve fell through the doorway again, Katie grabbed the cable she was holding and launched herself at the Winter Soldier jumping onto his back and wrapping the cable around his neck. He spun round angrily, grabbing at the cable before he reached up with his metal arm and grabbed the back of her hair, flipping her up and over before flinging her across the room at Steve who had pulled himself up against the elevator doors. Steve grunted as he caught her but quickly set her on her feet before shoving her out of the way just in time, as the Winter Soldier threw his whole weight into a punch to Steve’s chest, blowing him straight through the metal doors and down the elevator shaft.

Katie kicked at the desk in front of her, sending it The Soldier’s way as he was now advancing on her, but he broke through it easily, not even slowing in the slightest. She dodged under his arm and aimed a kick at the side of his knee, catching him perfectly and he stumbled forward. She then went to kick him again but he raised his metal arm to take the brunt of it, catching her leg so it was trapped between his arm and chest.

“Bucky this isn’t you.” Her words meant nothing to him. He grabbed a handful of her shirt with his other hand lifting her and tossing her like a rag doll straight into the wall where she banged her head painfully, causing her to see stars. She lay still for a while, dazed but and then she heard Sam shout

“Hey. You alright?”

“I think so.” She blinked groggily as Sam gently helped her to her feet. Everything seemed to work.

“C'mon,” He urged, heading towards the stairs “That so called doctor just left.”

Before Katie could head up the steps after him, a grunt caught her attention, it was Steve, minus his jacket, climbing his way out of the elevator shaft covered in dirt and sweat and looking far more attractive than he had any right to be in the middle of a damned fight.

“You okay?” He questioned only slightly out of breath from the climb, his hand dropping to his wife’s neck

“Yeah.”

“Bucky?”

“He went that way.” She pointed to the corridor on the left. "Back out to the facility. The doctor, he went the other way, Sam’s gone after him”

Steve quickly nodded. “I’ll get Bucky. You go after Sam and I’ll meet you outside.”

No further discussion was had as they split up.  By the time Katie emerged into the lobby of the facility, it was utter chaos where employees were all crushed together rushing to get out the doors and get to safety.

“Sam, any sign?” She asked as she found him outside looking round.

“No, come on.” He grabbed her hand so that they didn’t lose each other in the crowd as they moved outside the building. Sam stopped to pick up a discarded jacket that he recognised as belonging to the Fake Doctor, and Katie glanced down at it before looking around the crowd. There was no sign of him. It was then that she heard a chopper and instantly glanced up to the top of the building where a helicopter was attempting to take off. But the two-hundred plus pounds of super-solider hanging onto the landing skids was not letting go that easy. He kept hold as the helicopter dragged him to the edge, his boots skidding on the Heli-pad before he reached the end. Gritting his teeth he clung onto the skids of the helicopter with one hand, the other onto the railing of the building.

“No way.” Sam shook his head as he and Katie stood looking up at Steve who was stopping the helicopter “No goddamned way.”

The blades of the helicopter spun rapidly but it was going nowhere as Steve switched his grip on the railing. His muscles bulged and felt like they were on fire but he didn’t let go and, with a pained grit of his teeth, he pulled even harder and felt it start to come back to him. Then, it did a sharp turn towards Steve and he dived out of the way as it came to a stop. He stood up, made his way to the door but before he could do anything Bucky’s metal fist smashed through the glass on the door and gripped him round his neck. Steve planted both his feet on the side of the chopper, trying to release himself from the grip but it was no use.

And then the helicopter began sliding.

Katie’s grip tightened around Sam’s hand as they spotted Steve’s figure still attached to the helicopter as it fell from the top of the building and into the lake below. She instantly rushed forwards, but Sam wrapped both arms around her waist to restrain her, stopping her from diving head first into the water after him. 

Not again, she kept thinking to herself, the scenes from the last time him and Bucky had entered the water flashing before her eyes.

She hadn’t realised she was yelling until Sam shouted loudly, and pointed across the water, where a head had broken the surface. Steve was dragging Bucky up beside him. They rushed to the edge of the lake where Steve made sure they got Bucky out first before he hauled himself up beside them, water dripping onto the concrete.

Sam turned his attention to Bucky making sure he was only unconscious and still breathing, while Katie’s focus turned to her husband. The anger at him being a stupid, reckless moron again boiled over.

“Are you out of your fucking mind?” She screamed, before she reached back and slapped him hard across the face.  It was enough to make his head snap to the right.

“Ouch.” Sam muttered.

Steve looked at Katie, astonishment and maybe a hint of amusement on his face, before she threw herself into his arms, not caring that he was soaking wet, whilst as he wrapped his arms around her.

“You stupid…” Katie began to sob, her voice muffled as she pressed her face into his wet shirt and his hands tangled in her hair.

“I know, I know.” He muttered. “I’m sorry, Doll.” He dropped a soft kiss to her head before he gently moved her to the side and looked at Sam before nodding to the unconscious Bucky on the floor. “Let’s get out of here.”

**** Chapter 31

**Original Posting**

[goodwriterwithbadhabits]

Monsta X Reaction: Romance Is a Bonus Book Style.

for @httpdearbangtanboys​ (hope you enjoy)

Master List

Shownu: 

Shockingly, Shownu was comfortable, despite the fact almost your entire body was in his lap. You had come over hours ago, crying over another crappy boyfriend, and of course, sought your best friend’s comfort. Even now, as your head lay against the back of his couch, finally sleeping, there were still tear tracks on your cheeks. As carefully as possible, he wiped your cheeks, trying to clean them of your ruined makeup. When he realized his attempts were futile, he simply traced the outline of your face, your cheeks, jaw, the entire beautiful thing.

“I think he’s stupid, and a jerk and you deserve someone who won’t break your heart.” He whispers, pausing to cup your cheek. “Someone like me.” His voice is barely louder than a breath.

“Your hands are soft.” You kept your eyes closed, almost as if you were avoiding looking at him. 

“You’re awake.”

“And listening, care to repeat that last part?” You finally open your eyes, a smile dancing on your lips. 

“You deserve someone who won’t break your heart?” You shake your head slightly, and Shownu knows he’s caught.

“The part after that.” 

Minhyuk:

You showing up at Minhyuk’s door, unannounced, was not uncommon, in fact, it happened most nights of the week. However, you showing up at Minhyuk’s door, unannounced and soaking wet, well that was another matter entirely. It had quickly resulted in Minhyuk pulling you inside, making you take off your wet clothes, and go take a shower while he washed them. You ended up in one of his huge hoodies, one pulled directly out of the dryer, and a pair of sweatpants that were probably either Changkyun’s or Kihyun’s, but it didn’t really matter. Eventually, your tiredness combined with still being cold, resulted in your current position: passed out on Minhyuk’s chest on the couch. His fingers absent trailed across your face, mapping the features he knew so well, the features he could see, even with his eyes closed. 

“So pretty, how are you allowed to be so beautiful?”

“You like me, don’t you?” Minhyuk could have sworn his heart stopped at your words. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“So your heart just naturally beats this fast? Or is it just any time someone lays their head on your chest?” You fully opened your eyes, propping your chin on his sternum. He didn’t know how to respond, but your face still spread into a grin. “It's okay.” You shifted again, laying your head back down. “I kinda like you too.” 

Kihyun:

If there was one thing that Kihyun didn’t like, it was seeing the people he cares about sick. The thing he hated most of all, however, was seeing you in any way upset. You were everything to him, his best friend, and the person he loved most in the world, so when he got a call from your mom telling him you were sick and in the hospital, he almost lost his mind. 

Seeing you lying in the hospital bed, pale with purple shadows under your eyes, it made his stomach churn and his heart clench. Despite your mother arguing, he opted to stay with you for the night, sitting beside you in a chair, just making sure you were still there. 

“You’re so stupid sometimes.” He huffed, laying his head on the bed by your hand. “You always make me so worried, and you never notice.” He wrapped one of his hands around yours, his free one moving to push the hair away from your face. “Your mom thinks we’re dating,” His hand trails from your hair to your eyebrow, “I wouldn’t be too upset if we were.” He chuckles at his own words, but his laughter is cut short when your other hand wraps around his wrist, the heart monitor on your index finger cold against his skin. 

“You’re gonna get sick,” You mumbled, eyes barely cracked open. “You should go home, Ki.” 

“How can I? I don’t want you to be alone when you wake up.” He sits up, wrist still in your very loose grasp. “Go back to sleep, sweetheart. I’ll be here when you wake up.” 

“Silly, sappy boy, thinks he’s the only one with a crush.” Ki laughed softly at your slurred words, knowing you wouldn’t remember them in the morning. 

Hyungwon:

Hyungwon wasn’t sure how he’d ended up so lucky, and yet somehow so unlucky. His luck had peaked when meeting you, the most amazing woman he had ever met, and then it ran dry as you simply became friends. He wouldn’t trade your friendship for anything, except maybe the chance to be more than friends. You did nearly everything couples did anyway, picking each other up from work, surprise lunch dates, and even spent every Saturday, your only shared day off, together. Most Saturdays were like today, which consisted of you coming over to his apartment right after ending your nightshift and crawling into bed with him. Waking up like this, next to you, made his heart clench every time, but he would never ask you to stop. 

When he had first opened his eyes and was greeted by your sleeping form lying next to him, he almost thought his dream had come true, and then he remembered what day it was. He chose not to move, instead taking the chance to stare. He couldn’t help himself as he reached out, softly trailing his fingers over your features, marveling at how beautiful you were up close. 

“You have no idea what you do to me.” He breathed. “I thought myself so lucky to be your friend, and yet not lucky enough to be anything more.” He let out a sad laugh, “What a cruel fate.” Under his fingers, he felt the corner of your lips crook slightly. “You’re awake aren’t you?” Your eyes fluttered open, meeting his. 

“A cruel fate huh? We must both be cursed then.”

Jooheon:

Jooheon had quickly realized he liked sleeping next to you. Weeks ago you had crashed over at his house after a long night of Lord of the Rings and drinking games, and it had quickly become a habit to just sleep in his bed if you didn’t want to walk home. Though the act really didn’t help Jooheon’s crush on you. 

There you were, inches away from him, sound asleep and seemingly unaware of his staring. It wasn’t his fault you were so damn beautiful, it wasn’t his fault he had accidentally fallen in love with his best friend, it was just how things were. 

“How are you so beautiful?” He whispered to himself, fingers lightly trailing around the edges of your lips. “So unfair, everyone you’ve ever kissed, and I’m not one of them.” He dropped his hand, though it stayed just next to your face. “What I wouldn’t give to kiss you, just once.” With a small sigh, he shut his eyes, trying to just get to sleep. Only a few seconds passed before he heard a rustle from you and suddenly, your soft lips were pressed against his. The kiss was fleeting, and by the time he opened his eyes, your head was once again resting on the pillow, your hand now inches from his. “Did you just-?”

“Shhhh, Joohoney, it’s bedtime.” He was too stunned to say anything, though he knew his answer from the way your lips crooked into a smile. He let out a small laugh, simply wrapping his hand around yours and closing his eyes again. 

He could live with just a fleeting kiss until morning. 

Changkyun: (Did someone say college!Changkyun?)

It was not uncommon for you to fall asleep during your study sessions with Kyun, and usually, the boy simply put a blanket over your shoulders and let you sleep, but tonight there was something different. You hadn’t changed, not that he could see, but the way he saw you had. It didn’t help that instead of falling asleep with your face tucked into your arms, you had your chin propped up on your hand, allowing him to see your peaceful face in its entirety. He had spent all night trying not to be distracted by you, though his eyes kept shifting to watch your lips as you mouthed the words on the page in front of you. Now that you had fallen asleep, he couldn’t help but stare, with one thought clouding his mind. 

“Were you always so pretty?”

Leaning forward slightly, he trailed the end of his pen down the bridge of your nose, slowly trying not to wake you.

“If you’ve been drawing on my face, I swear to god, I’m going to shove that pen up your nose.” Kyun froze as you opened your eyes. He blinked at you for a second before throwing the pen over his shoulder. 

“What pen?” 

Wonho:

His fingers were soft as they trailed over your face, outlining all the features, repeating the same trail over and over again. Your head lay on his shoulder, body nestled next to his, legs intertwined. You weren’t a couple, but Wonho always wished you were. He had never been this close to someone before, never felt so drawn to another human being, and he knew it could never happen. Not with his lifestyle, not with the press so eager to destroy him. He could never ask you to go through that. 

“What are you doing, Hoseok?” Your voice was soft, drawing him out of his own thoughts. 

“I’m trying to memorize your face.” He confesses. “So I don’t forget it while I’m away.” You’re staring up at him, eyes still cloudy with sleep, and he has to stop himself from kissing you right then. 

“I’d like to think I mean enough to you, that three months isn’t going to make you forget me.” You joke, and Wonho smiles down at you. 

“Of course not, but it won’t get to be this close to you for a while. I’m afraid I’ll forget what it feels like.” You offer him a comforting smile. 

“Well, I’m here now, and I’ll be here when you get back. I don’t plan to leave anytime soon.” Wonho can’t help the smile that spreads across his face. 

“Good, cause I’m not letting you go anywhere.” You press your face further into his neck.

“Glad we figured that out, now let's get some sleep, you have a long day tomorrow.” 

“Yeah.” He would tell you, eventually, but for now, he kinda liked everything how it was.

[theyearoftheking]

Book Seventy-Two: The Bazaar of Bad Dreams

I’ve made some things for you, Constant Reader; you see them laid out before you in the moonlight. But before you look at the little handcrafted treasures I have for sale, let’s talk about them for a bit, shall we? It won’t take long. Here, sit down beside me. And do come a little closer. I don’t bite. Except... we’ve known each other for a very long time, and I suspect you know that’s not entirely true. Is it? 

I first read this book back in 2016, but some of these stories made quite an impact. I’m looking at you, The Dune, Morality, and Ur. Personally, I find this the most memorable collection of short stories... even the ones that haven’t been on my mind for the past five years, I remembered them as soon as I was a few paragraphs in. Like all collections, there were some I preferred over others, but there were more hits than not in Bazaar. 

And there were a ton of nods to the Constant Reader universe:

A Locke & Key comic reference (Maybe not the Constant Reader universe, but definitely adjacent. And if you haven’t read these graphic novels- please drop everything you’re doing, and get your hands on a copy). 

Christine (still at the bottom of my list)

Castle Rock

Dark Tower/Low Men in Yellow Coats/Red eye pin

Nozzy soda (I’m assuming this Nozz-A-La) 

Andy Clutterbuck (Sheriff from Castle Rock)

Gunslinger

And Steve must have been feeling particularly cheesy, because there were 4 Wisconsin mentions! My personal favorite is the line, “...but Hubie’s on a fishing trip somewhere in Rectal Thermometer, Wisconsin...” 

Now. 

I’ve never been to Rectal Thermometer, but it sounds lovely. I bet it’s somewhere in Burnett or Washburn counties. Fishing there would be a real delight. Disclaimer: in no world to I find fishing to be a delight... regular fishing, or ice fishing, which is just a slightly deeper circle of hell. I have horrible memories of ice fishing as a kid, and stepping into a hole more than once, soaking my boot and socks. Fucking ice fishing. But I digress. 

I’ll highlight just a few stories in this collection, the first one being Herman Wouk is Still Alive. Brenda wins $2,700 off a lottery ticket, and calls her friend Jasmine, and convinces her to pack up her kids and go on a road trip. They’ll use the winnings to rent a swanky van, stay overnight in a hotel so their kids can play in the pool, and indulge in some take-out on their way to visit family. Jasmine reluctantly agrees, and the two of them pack up their seven kids. On the drive, Brenda and Jasmine share some coffee brandy, talk about how shitty their lives are, and how it doesn’t look like things are ever going to get better. Brenda takes a look in the backseat and worries about what kind of life their kids are going to have. Annnnd then she jams her foot on the gas, gets the van up to one-hundred miles per hour, and crashes the van head-on into a tree, killing all of them. 

Some events have transpired since the first time I read this story and now. Namely, the murder-suicide of the Hart family.

 I am equally disgusted, heart-broken, and fascinated by this horrible story. Jen and Sara Hart were being investigated by CPS after allegations of abuse and withholding food from their six children surfaced; and they fled their home. They drugged their kids with cough syrup, and drove off a cliff, killing everyone. This is a rabbit hole I can’t stop going down, and there’s so much to explore. If you want to join me in the rabbit hole, check out the Broken Harts podcast. Sometimes the scariest monsters are walking among us, disguised as white savior women. 

The second story I really loved was Under the Weather, which was a grittier version of A Rose for Emily. I don’t particularly love Faulkner (blasphemy for an English major, I know)- but Under the Weather was delicious in it’s depravity. Having read it a second time, I knew what the plot twist was, but that didn’t make it any less enjoyable. 

The final story I really enjoyed was Ur. The story is quaint in that it was set in a time when digital readers and Kindle apps on phones were not as common as they are now. Amazon actually reached out to Steve to have him write a story about a Kindle, and it’s so perfectly Steve. I mean... where else would you encounter a Kindle that connects to alternate timelines, full of stories authors in this timeline never published, and the Low Men need to come and confiscate it? It’s got some fun Dark Tower Easter eggs, and makes you wonder if traditional books might just be safer after all. 

Speaking of which, my Kindle Fire decided to stop downloading books. It still performs every other function just fine, but won’t download anything I purchase off the Kindle store. So, I found a great deal on a Paperwhite, and bought one. Y’all... I hate it. The only advantage to the Paperwhite is the only thing I can do on it is read. I’m not distracted by emails or Facebook messages. But I hate the screen resolution, I hate how slow it moves, I hate that it will accidentally flip four pages at a time... I don’t love it. Maybe this challenge has spoiled me in that I really do love real books after all. 

Total Wisconsin Mentions: 46

Total Dark Tower References: 68

Book Grade: A+

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books

Doctor Sleep: A+

The Talisman: A+

Wizard and Glass: A+

11/22/63: A+

Mr. Mercedes: A+

Under the Dome: A+

Needful Things: A+

On Writing: A+

The Green Mile: A+

Hearts in Atlantis: A+

Full Dark, No Stars: A+

The Bazaar of Bad Dreams: A+

Just After Sunset: A+

Rose Madder: A+

Misery: A+

Different Seasons: A+

It: A+

Four Past Midnight: A+

Stephen King Goes to the Movies: A+

The Shining: A-

The Stand: A-

Bag of Bones: A-

Duma Key: A-

Black House: A-

The Wastelands: A-

The Drawing of the Three: A-

The Dark Tower: A-

Dolores Claiborne: A-

Blaze: B+

Hard Listening: B+

Revival: B+

Nightmares in the Sky: B+

The Dark Half: B+

Joyland: B+

Skeleton Crew: B+

The Dead Zone: B+

Nightmares & Dreamscapes: B+

Wolves of the Calla: B+

‘Salem’s Lot: B+

Song of Susannah: B+

Carrie: B+

Creepshow: B+

From a Buick 8: B

The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon: B

The Colorado Kid: B-

Storm of the Century: B-

Everything’s Eventual: B-

Cycle of the Werewolf: B-

The Wind Through the Keyhole: B-

Danse Macabre: B-

The Running Man: C+

Cell: C+

Thinner: C+

Dark Visions: C+

The Eyes of the Dragon: C+

The Long Walk: C+

The Gunslinger: C+

Pet Sematary: C+

Firestarter: C+

Rage: C

Desperation: C-

Insomnia: C-

Cujo: C-

Nightshift: C-

Faithful: D

Gerald’s Game: D

Roadwork: D

Lisey’s Story: D

Christine: D

Dreamcatcher: D

The Regulators: D

The Tommyknockers D

Next up is Finders Keepers, the second book in the Bill Hodge’s trilogy. I finished it this morning because there’s a blizzard outside, and I refuse to leave my house to go to work. Ah, the joys of Midwest living. Maybe I’m in Rectal Thermometer, Wisconsin after all. 

Until next time, Long Days & Pleasant Nights, Rebecca

[tata-is-the-name]

What’s wrong? (Tj Hammond) (Pt.2)

PART 1

Characters: Bi!TJ Hammond x Asian!Female!Reader

Summary: You're an overseas worker and is in a relationship with TJ, but people can't seem to accept the differences between you both even by financially and background wise. (PART 2!) (Read part 1 before this? Heehee!)

Warning: VERY Detailed making out but no tickling the pickle. Heehee! Cuss words. ANGST, SAD AND A VERY FURIOUS TJ HAMMOND.

Words: 4700+ (IT'S LONG AF AGAIN. 😂)

A/N: I love Tj Hammond so much? You can certainly see how I love him by reading this? Lmao. GO BE CRAZY WITH YOUR FEEDBACKS, TATER TOTS! Typos and grammatical errors may be a lot because English has only been my second language. 😅 LOTS OF GIFS IN THIS ONE! (Btw, Political Animal's plot has kinda been blurry to me right now because I've watched it last year. So, there maybe some changes if you'll notice if I have some errors about the story. Heehee. 😅 Or maybe not? I have no idea.)

Disclaimer: GIF'S and pictures used are not mine. Only the edits are and the oneshot of course. 😉 Credits to the owners of the GIFS.

Dedicated: @fandomgalcentral​

The whole boring but essentially interesting party was finally done. After all that argument you had with a journalist, and Tj being the knight and shining armor to scoot the woman off have ruined your bladder. With a lot of Martinis you took made you a little tipsy, making you all giggly and wanting to pee all the while.

In all honesty, you were kind of smashed. But, not smashed enough to fall on the floor with a pile of barf. No. You should keep your head straight before embarrassing yourself from the Hammond family.

"Teejaaaay," You clung your arm around his waist, hugging your boy friend as he was playing you a song on the piano in which you requested for him to do. He was too engrossed on playing, the relaxing melody making you smile. Your eyes turning into slits when you did and that adorable smile didn't go unnoticed by Tj as he was quick to take a peek as his fingers continued to play. "Teejaaaay,"

The guests weren't around anymore, they all went home and it was only you and him. Probably Nana in the dining room, drowning in more glasses of Margaritas since you could hear glasses clinging from there. You intently watched his fingers move in such a professional manner. He got it in him. Tj got the talent even though he hadn't got to play for months now. It was still in his blood.

"You're one sexy mofo," You suddenly uttered lowly, completely out of your wits, followed by a giggle that made him do a double take. Your eyes squinting on his face, closely staring at your gorgeous boy.

He ceased his fingers from playing. A snort wanting to erupt from your sudden confession. "Aren't you..." He paused, his shoulders shaking from trying not to laugh at you because he knew how emotional you can get when you're drunk. "Is my little noodle buzzed right now?" Tj peered down into your eyes, ever so lovingly. Never forgetting to give you that wild feeling inside your stomach, making the butterflies fly.

"No," Your nose was scrunched from his question. You? Drunk? Never. Was he hallucinating? When does Y/N get drunk? "You're hilarious, Honey." His eyebrow rose from your sudden sweet endearment acompanied with a dash of sweet talking.

Definitely buzzed. He thought inside his mind, clearly noticing the sudden urge of being confident with yourself since you weren't like that all the time. He knew you were conservative, quiet and only sweet to him not to others.

Tj held the end of the piano cover, gently dropping the cover before glancing at you who seemed to be completely confused. "What??" You voiced out your confusion. "That's it? But, I wanted moreee!" Your voice faded, turning softer and more quiet. "Because you seemed to be so happy playing the piano again," you whispered to yourself. "I loooove your smiles,"

To your surprise, Tj caught on to what you said because it wasn't quite quiet as you thought it would. "I've been happy because you've never left me when I needed someone to be with me the most," he stared into your eyes, a lot more tender than he used to. A small smile pulling the ends of his lips that made you coo like you were a crazy mother supporting her son.

"Aww," You actually muttered out loud, pouting up at him and he couldn't help but touch the end of your nose with his fingertip, making himself chuckle from how you scrunched up your nose once again. "Look at chu', Teejaaay. Confessing the love you have for a worthless overseas worker who happened to work in a bakery shop in the morning, and a waitress in a bar when she gets her nightshift--"

Tj held your lips with his finger, shutting you up before you could start your emotional rant that could make his feelings take a turn, the constant heavy feeling for how you were thinking about yourself. He didn't want to hear your extreme critizations about who you are. It pains to hear you say all those words when in fact, you never saw how perfect you are in his eyes.

"I know you're drunk, but don't start and upset me, Y/N." He whispered very lowly, a frown was now visible on his features which made you reciprocate his expression.

You sighed, keeping your eye contact despite of your 'slight' intoxication. Just staring right through him, appreciating the once broken boy in front of you, still in recovery. That soft look in your eyes made him glance at your crusty ass lips that made him break his frown.

Keep in mind to give Y/N those lip balms he uses whenever he goes out. He smiled, slowly caressing your shoulder, down to your arm which made you pout up at him. Resisting the way he looks at you were one of your weaknesses because you never did anyway.

"I swear, if you don't make out with me in front of this piano, I'm--"

His eyes glimmered then turned into small crescents as he chuckled, sounding so heartfelt. "Here I thought you were one conservative lady," He raised a brow, looking and sounding so sassy. Just like your sassy Tj that you love so much.

"Surprise! I'm actually not one right now," You chatted him up nonchalantly, clicking your head to the side with a naughty smirk. "If only you could draw me like one of your french girls while I lay naked on this piano but I'm no French and you're certainly no painter--"

Tj cackled out loud, alarming your intoxicated self as you jumped on the piano seat. "Only my Y/N could drop the weirdest hints to make me french kiss her on this piano,"

Your heart was frantically jumping out of your chest. Was it probably the effect of alcohol? Or maybe it was honestly Tj's damn effect on your whipped self? "I actually said IN FRONT of this piano, but I have no complaints about making out with me on top of this oh-so-sleek piano--" You emphasized, gesturing on the piano in front of you. Tj couldn't help but shake his head from how funny and adoring you were acting tonight.

"Jesus Christ," He mumbled as you heard him chuckle. A small insect that flew on your nose distracted your current state of mind. Blasè from how you naturally slapped your own nose with your own hand, making you groan because it hurt.

Don't think it didn't go unnoticed by your boyfriend because it did, and he laughed even more.

"You're such a talkative noodle when you're drunk," To your surprise, you didn't see him stand up from his seat. "Tj--" And he basically captured you in his arms, instantly placing you on top of their piano that made all the heat travel towards your face. What if his mother sees the both of you in that 'thirsty' position? What will she think of you? Not that your mind could muster those things up right now because all its focus is on Tj and his sexy ass self. Nobody else.

"Eeeek! Tj!" You shrieked, shyly covering your lips with your hands, a smile never fading.

"Shut up," He uttered non-chalantly his next words stated as if it was a matter of fact. "That crusty ass lips needs a little dusting anyway,"

Your boyfriend and his sass. Thus, it was your time to raise a brow. "I am offended," He grinned, leaning in close, his cerulean blue eyes turning darker with the mischievous thought that he had in mind. "Preferably with my tongue," Tj added so smoothly before catching your lips with his.

You were currently in a whirlwind, with how Tj was kissing you? He was definitely a pro at it. Creating a world inside your mind that nobody could ever jump in. Just you and Tj. Your own little world.

Tj bit your lip, igniting a purr inside of you that made him grip your hips tight, turning on an imaginary switch that could make him go on and on, dangerously never wanting to stop. He chuckled a very low one once he got to lick your lips, teasing you which made you shuffle your legs and change your current sitting position. Boldly untangling your legs and propelling to have Tj between your thighs, making him oblige with no complaints because he was already used to it. Used to how you like him between your thighs every so often.

The way you tightly tug on his coat could define you as a cat wanting his or her owner for food. Definitely deprived and hungry for what Tj could give.

For you? He'll give you everything you wanted. Even the sun or the moon if he was being unrealistic.

"T-J?" You whispered, talking through his kisses and getting distracted by the sounds it creates from the way he was practically eating your face with closed eyes. Your hands instinctively took his face, keeping himself angled from where you could kiss him affectionately as you can, adding a little bit of tongue as you do even though you weren't quite used to it. Tj didn't mind though because he was quick to lap up your tongue back just like how you did.

Your spine shivered when you felt his fingers cascade on the side of your neck, clasping his fingers on your nape and keeping you there where he wanted. "You're," Peck. "the only," Smooch. "person," Bite. "who," A quiet giggle from the both of you "keeps me," Lick. "sane," Another deep kiss that drugged your kind soul.

A special drug that Tj could only effect you with it.

"The piano," Dougie sounded so done with everything, probably exactly exhausted from their engagement party and seeing his brother making out with his girlfriend certainly added more fatigue to the previous one. "Really, Tj?"

"God, I don't play the piano because you do those stuffs but Nana uses that for fucks sake,"

If it wasn't for Tj who happened to stopped the kisses, you guys wouldn't probably stop because you were too intoxicated and worked up to even know his brother was there. "A cockblocker," Tj backed his head a little, giving you space to breath. You felt him swipe the sides of your lips with his thumbs, erasing the smudge of your nude lipstick, paying no mind that his brother saw him making out with you. "As per usual," Your lover sounded unamused before finally giving his brother the attention he deserved.

"You guys..." Dougie gestured to the both of you before cringing, "were planning to...?" Tj nodded his head, his powdery blue eyes glimmering against the lights with euphoria. Definitely it was because of you.

"Yeah," He cocked his head to the side, playfully squinting his eyes at his brother and still sounding unamused. "Apparently, you're a cockblocker," His lips turn to a grin in which his brother has reciprocated as well. "Continuously giving me blue balls, Doug. You're the best," Tj added with a strong sense of sarcasm.

"Nana's gonna whoop your ass," Dougie chuckled, tugging on the lapels of his coat to flatten it up. "Anyway, mom needs to talk to you,"

You continued to stare at the beautiful man standing in between you with a dreamy glint in your eyes, never cutting off your attention to look at his brother. Heat travelled to your cheeks with your gal bladder twisting in a knot though that didn't stop you from staring at your boyfriend like a high school kid.

"I need to talk to her anyways," Tj informed his brother with a tiny raise of his brow, his attention solely on his brother who walked a foot closer to where you were. "Is it about the dome? did something happen?"

"Nah," Tj shook his head and he could feel you tugging on his shoulder. Slightly shaking to get his attention. "Just something important that I need to talk to her about,"

Dougie nodded, not wanting to dig deeper because apparently Thomas didn't want to tell him the details. He briefly looked at you, and he couldn't help but smile. Entirely amused by how you were asking Tj for help to take you to the bathrooms because you wanted to pee so bad.

"Y/N's drunk." Dougie responded as he watched Tj help you jump down the piano. "Well, that's a first,"

"You didn't need to state to obvious, Doug." Tj muttered with a chuckle. Feeling your arms surround him in a tight hug while humming at the same time. "I wanna pee, I wanna pee," You repeated, sniffing your boyfriend's sweet, masculine, vanilla perfume that you love so much.

"Oh, God. I didn't know she's like this when she's drunk." He tried stopping his giggle when you tried your best to tiptoe and sniff his delectable neck. Humming from how scenty his perfume was. He emitted a snort, jumping as he giggled like a kid as he took his palm to cover your lips. "You're tickling me, sweetheart!"

"Let me peeeeee, Hammondddddd..Or I'm biting you!" You slurred and sounded inaudible. Licking his palm at the same time in which he didn't find it gross and kept covering your lips. "Rawr!"

"God," Dougie facepalmed, keeping himself pretty composed but he couldn't help but still chuckle from your intoxicated state.

"Jesus Christ! Okay! Okay! We're going to take you to the bathrooms and you're gonna have your wondrous pee time," Tj talked you through, his amused eyes staring down at you with a tender smile and glimmer. "Got that, baby?"

You were quick to give him a shaky salute, a giggle never forgetting to travel way past your lips with a wiggle of your brows that made his brother glance at the both of you before spinning on his heels to walk away.

"Sir, yes--!" You hiccupped, giggling in the process with your eyes turning crescents. "--Baby--Sir?"

                                               ✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

"Thanks, mom. I really needed that discouragement,"

"Tj, you're being a little too head over heels with this Asian woman--"

"And now you're giving out negative complaints again even when I had a relationship with a man," Tj had his hands on his hips, seeming to appear stupified from all he was hearing from Elaine Hammond. The secretary of the state. A.K.A his mother.

His eyes were bloodshot red, emotions currently in a mess and thoughts were in a haywire. "Do you even consider my happiness, mom?" He answered back, standing a foot away from his mother.

"Tj, honey," Elaine sounded defeated, a loud sigh escaping her lips. "You know I do,"

"Then why do you oppose me of marrying her?!" Her son's animosity kept her mouth shut. What was the problem with his decision? Why was she saying no to his decision even though he was already an adult? Old enough to think through his decisions in life?

Tj couldn't help but chuckle in anger before hastily shifting to rage that made him spit accidental profanities towards his mother. "She's not a fucking congressman who decided to give up on me and those kind of shit!"

"You watch that language young man!" Elaine's eyes wanted to pop out of her eyesockets. They were not having this talk again.."It's just--" His mother stuttered, finding the right words so she wouldn't hurt her precious son. "What I actually wanted to point out is that it's too soon, son." She paused, taking another sigh when she saw him shake his head in disdain.

There had been a second of silence, waiting for her son to talk but Tj kept his mouth shut as he waits for her to finish her sweet scolding. "You're dating her for like," She thought for a second, counting the months that Y/N and Tj were together inside her head. "--a year? this was the first time we've got to talk again in person and this is what you surprise me with?" Elaine had a hint of distress in her voice. "A quick sudden marriage that you wanted to tie her up?"

Tj cut their eye contact. The floor currently more appealing to stare at rather than his unsupportive mother who found this very important decision in his life, very wrong for her. An utter mistake.

"Teejay, honey," She sweet talked, trying to make him feel better. "I...I just don't want the past to repeat itself, you know how it was when you dated Sean,"

Tj had his tongue poking on the insides of his cheeks. One of his defense mechanisms or ways to show that he was on the verge of crying. He puffed out air out of his mouth, entirely distressed from his mother's opposition.

He cleared his throat, emphasizing his words with some simple movements of his hands. Eyes completely irked by how things wouldn't go as planned. "But, she's different mom. She isn't like him. I've been clean for the past year!"

"That's what you said when you dated him back then," She deadpanned, reciprocating his gestures as she placed her hands on her hips.

"Mom," Tj sounded desperate. His eyes completely glossy under the incandescent lights. "I'm downright in love with her," He added, biting his lips as hard as how his mother's way of thinking was unwavered.

Tj choked on his own words, cinching his eyebrows as he added. "--And I've never been this lovestruck with a woman for all my life," her son paused, taking a breather. "I love her too much that it'll hurt if she lets me go,"

Elaine shook her head in disappointment. "And your solution for that fear you feel is to marry the heck out of Y/N?" She spat. "Tj, do you even have a single trust for her?"

Tj couldn't help but groan internally, roughly pulling on the ends of his roots as he stared at his mother, entirely stupefied from how she was taking everything in. "I do, Mom! I do! I'm just scared that it'll happen again," Thomas honestly spoke, voice turning softer from opening a wound that was already healing. Even close to being healed. "Especially with her,"

Elaine was staring at her son with pity. Tj completely looked like a puppy who was in need of an owner, a pup who was deprived from love and care. His mother couldn't help the tears from starting to form because how can she let her once happy son end up that way? How could she?

Was she really a bad mother?

"She's special," Tj added desperately, eyes bloodshot red. "She saved my life," He choked, sniffing to himself as he washed his face with a hand. Pulling the strings of his fragile heart in misery. "Saved me from all the suicide attempts that I wanted to happen," pause. "Saved me from caging inside my fears, insecurities and darkness that was bound to trap me till I couldn't find my way out,"

Tj’s Cerulean eyes were blazing with great dread and cracks that formed his soul. Confessing how he could be weak without this woman in front of his mom was giving him anxiety and hearing himself speak about Y/N was making his image look more delicate than ever. Yet, he gave zero fucks about it because when did his image became important anyways?

"Mom, I know she's the one for me," he croaked, swallowing the tight feeling inside his chest. A drop of warm tear fell on the side of his eyes, but he was quick to wipe it away a little roughly, blaming his soft heart because he was already crying. Again. "I don't give a damn about her ethnicity nor her race. I don't even care if she's rich or not because those things aren't important to me, "

Elaine Hammond got her tongue stuck in her throat as she saw her son in the verge of bawling his eyes out in front of her. There was more to his tears other than the fact that she was disapproving his decision about marriage. "All I care about is how she truly loves me back just the way I love her," Tj continued, voice cracking from his own words.

"Because that's what went wrong with the relationship that I had with Sean. Now, that I got everything in hand," he sighed, controlling the anger, sadness and disappointment all together. "Why would I even let her go?"

Was she really disapproving Tj's decision because she thought it was too soon for the both of them? Or was it because she sees him as her healing son who had his heart up his sleeve? Scared that he would actually break again and he wouldn't get to find the light anymore?

"Tj," Elaine started, shoulders and head straight as she was about to explain herself. "No, mom." her son cut her off, looking completely rigid. "You just don't want her to be a part of this family," Tj harshly spat.

"What's even wrong with her?" he was entirely skeptical at the idea of Y/N not being liked by his very own mother. It was much more dissatisfying when he heard the former president, specifically his father's who came barging in their conversation.

"Everything," Bud intervened and deadpanned, igniting the fire with more gas if that was even possible.

Tj could feel his nerves in a wreck. He was mad, frustrated for the hundred time because of his own family, especially towards his father. "We're not like you, dad! If you're worried because one of us may commit some fucking adultery like what you just did because I couldn't keep it in my pants--!"

"Thomas!" Elaine scolded and didn't let him finish his own sentence. She knew what he was going to say and there was no doubt that her son knew what his father did. It was not like it was a secret because it has been Bud's serious scandal back when he was still the president.

"So, you're teaming up with him now?!" said Tj, thoroughly upset by how their talk went.

"Thomas James Hammond! You are stepping in your boundaries!"

Tj shook his head in disdain, snickering from everything that was happening as of the moment. He faked a smile, a silhouette of another man coming from the kitchen. "Tj--" Dougie started, trying to understand both sides as he was hearing them out in the kitchen. The conversation was turning more heated and he knew if he didn't stop them then it'll get more nasty for the family.

"Even you too, Dougie?" his younger brother uttered, features getting hard and his cerulean eyes piercing through their skins.

"Fuck, this family is perfect!" His feigned laugh echoed through the room.

You were in the comfort room, currently counting the small pimples on your face, scrunching your nose when you've counted more than ten. Definitely not a perfect woman for Thomas James Hammond and your drunk self is pondering why he was still staying with you when he could've had proportioned models or even sons or daughters of known politicians.

Nevertheless, he chose to stay with you. A woman who got nothing but a kind heart to offer.

You were lucky to have him all to yourself.

Hush exchanges and deep discussions started from the living room. You can hear Tj's sexy, sultry rough voice coming from that certain room. As you were walking through the hallway, you've heard him sternly say things about how his family didn't want you to be part of his, like his mother didn't wholeheartedly accept you.

With Bud's words, it was a guarantee that what he said was finally confirmed. He really didn't like you for his son.

Yes, you were lucky. But, not for his family.

"Tj--" Dougie started to explain, but Tj cut him off with a harsh spat.

"No, no, no. No one really gives a shit,"

"Don't even bother coming to The Dome for its one year anniversary, go fucking throw all those invitations away for all I care!" Tj mumbled as he scrambled to his feet, he was completely drowning in his thoughts for you. He needed to find you because the room was beginning to choke him alive. "Even though, you all know how important you are to me,"

You were at the end of the room, hazy, dreary eyes seeing Tj striding across the room to find you. You fiddled with the lapels of his black coat resting on your shoulder. Basically, you looked like a drunk, kicked abandoned puppy who seemed to not be liked by his family.

A hug was all you wanted right now, and by the looks of your furious, teary eyed, healing Hammond, he desperately needs one too.

"Let's go, Y/N." Tj's warm, comforting hand grabbed yours. Roughly tugging you along in your heels. You were struggling in your shoes and by how fast and long his legs were. "T-Tj..Slow down, please?" you stuttered, alcohol running in your veins and it wasn't helping that the world was twirling in a vortex.

He abruptly stopped in front of their door, your forehead hitting his back with a soft thud. Automatically uttering a tender apology towards the latter. Tj spun in his heels, his long, soft, pretty fingers wrapping around your wrist a little too tightly. Probably because of his anger towards everything, yet you weren't complaining because you were too drunk to even retort. You were even numb from the alcohol and from the piercing words that went straight to the heart.

If only it was all but a dream..

"You guys are the fucking best," you heard Tj sarcastically spat towards his family who were shooting daggers at the both of you. They couldn't understand yet. No, not until they wanted to understand where Tj was coming from then they wouldn't get to.

They wouldn't get to because they've never understood him since he was in the white house.

Thomas James Hammond only needed love, understanding and affection. He just wanted to be loved. He has ever been a soft boy.

Y/N Y/L/N came along and gave him what he wanted, yet she wasn't downright accepted.

Just like TJ Hammond, and that was probably why they were good for each other.

Then the door slammed shut, vibrating their stunned souls. Nana revealed herself from the kitchen, a disappointed look on her pretty, aging face. She knew she liked Y/N's pure heart. More so for her grandson because she knew how he was whipped and ready to climb mountains for this woman.

Elaine's mother sipped on her martini, her voice cracking from age as she finally addressed the elephant in the room. "Elaine," she grabbed her daughter's attention. "You won't be getting to save Tj for the second time now because you've just showed how invalid he was. Y/N will." Elaine frowned tightly, trying hard not to roll her eyes as she was trying to process everything at hand.

Margaret huffed as she glanced at Elaine's ex-husband. "As for you, Bud.." She eventually snickered, twirling the glass in her feeble hands with a stressed out tone.

"You're a dick,”

GOSH. I LOVE TJ HAMMOND TOO MUCH. GO LIKE AND REBLOG THIS IF Y’ALL LOVE TJ HAMMOND! Sorry if it’s too long? Hehehe!

XOXO, TATA

[what-is-your-plan-today]

Stark Spangled Banner Ch30: Winter Is Here

Summary: In the wake of the UN Bombing, Steve, Katie and Sam (with help from Sharon) track Bucky to Bucharest and face a race against time to track him down before the CTU. But someone else is also following Bucky, someone who’s been one step ahead and the consequences are disastrous.

Warnings: Bad Language words and a heap of Bucky on a motorbike!

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist 

Bucky liked Bucharest. It was easy enough to blend in and he’d found work at a local Warehouse easily enough. It was no questions asked, cash in hand and no trail- perfect. Physical labour didn’t bother him, neither did taking the nightshifts which no one else seemed to want. It meant he could sleep most of the days and emerge later at night, less people to encounter. Not that it really mattered, no one really bothered him apart from the Old Lady that lived a few floors down. Bucky often did odd jobs for her, just like he had used to for the old couple that lived across from them in Brooklyn before the war.

Since arriving in Europe in September last year, his life had been pretty peaceful. His memories had started to flash back almost the instant he wasn’t re-wiped by Hydra, but they were random, non-chronological, so he had started writing them in a notebook along with other snippets and facts he found along the way which helped him piece together the parts of the puzzle that was his life. Now he knew his name, his date of birth, who his parents were, his siblings, Steve- his brother-from-another-Mother, the Howling Commandos, his ‘death’ and then… well, that bit he tried not to remember on purpose.

He felt better, like himself, and had on more than one occasion thought about reaching out to Steve. But the thing was, even though he’d now been out of Hydra control for over 2 years, he knew that what they had done to him or put in his head was still there, and he didn’t want to give anyone the chance to find out the hard-way or give them chance to lock him up like some lab rat. So he had decided it was best to stay off radar.

Pulling his cap down a little he headed over to his favourite fruit store for some plums. He remembered what a treat they had been back before the war, and he enjoyed the fact they were so readily available. He reached out with his flesh hand to gently test one. 

“How are they? Are they good?” he asked the vendor in Romanian who nodded to him, smiling “Ok Give me six, thank you”

With his bag of fruit he walked along, casually scanning around as he ate. And then, across the street he spotted a vendor at a news-stand watching him. Bucky glanced away hastily then looked back at the man who was still watching him. Suddenly the guy ran from his kiosk. With a sick feeling in his stomach Bucky made his way over and picked up a paper and as he looked at the front page which contained a number of surveillance-photos of a man and the head line: 'Winter Soldier cautat pentru Bombardmentul din Viena'. 

A cold feeling washed all over him and he glanced around, swallowing thickly. 

He might have struggled with his memory in the past but he could categorically say this wasn’t one of those times. This wasn’t him, granted it looked like him, but it wasn’t.

Shit, he needed to hide.

Pulling his cap down further, jacket pulled up round his neck he set off home.

****** Having your own private plane certainly has its perks. Katie, Sam and Steve made their way to Vienna and from there, after being given a lead from Sharon, they headed to Bucharest. Steve and Sam had brought all their equipment whereas Katie had opted to simply pack her cat suit and utility belt as they weren’t anticipating any action. A decision she was starting to regret now.

“Nice place." Katie commented sarcastically, pulling at the neck of her leather cat-suit as they entered the old rundown apartment that Bucky Barnes now called home. Steve ignored the comment before he carefully closed the door behind them. The two of them ventured further into the small darkened apartment, the windows had been taped over with old newspapers keeping out most of the sunlight and prying eyes. Steve’s shield caught a few of the spots of light which were creeping through tears and gaps in the paper, sending reflections onto bits of the apartment walls. The bedroom and the living area were one, a tattered mattress placed just beneath the window a small desk and lamp next to it. Across from the bed near the entrance was a metal table with two chairs next to it, then there was the kitchen area and a door, which Katie headed through, gun at the ready, finding nothing but a small, grimy and empty bathroom.

She couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of sadness in her gut that the man who had saved her life, a war veteran, was living like this.

Steve took to looking around the kitchen and had found a notebook of sorts with tabs of varying colours sticking out from amongst the pages. As he flicked through he found a leaflet on the Smithsonian Captain America exhibit.

"Heads up guys, German Special Forces approaching from the South." Sam's voice came through the coms.

"Understood.” Steve replied gently, replacing the leaflet in the page he had found it, fingers lingering on the paper. He looked up at Katie as she re-entered the room.

“Nobody's home." she said softly. “What you got there?” “It’s a journal.” Steve said, “He’s been writing down memories and-“

He stopped dead as a movement crossed his peripheral and his head jerked up. Over his wife’s shoulder he locked eyes with Bucky for the first time since that day over the Potomac. Katie, noticing his demeanour, glanced over her shoulder and instantly spun round to see Bucky watching the pair of them with a cautious sort of curiosity.

"Do you know me?" Steve asked carefully, setting the book he was flipping through down on the cluttered counter. He moved in front of Katie slightly, keeping himself between her and his best friend who was stood stock still, eyeing them up.

"You're Steve," Bucky said roughly, "I read about you in a museum."  he added immediately, nodding to himself. 

Play dumb, Bucky, play dumb…

"They've set the perimeter." Sam spoke in their ears.

"I know you're nervous, and you've got plenty of reason to be, but you're lying." Steve said calmly, not believing him for a second. He could always tell when Bucky was lying, right as kids, as he wouldn’t look you in the eye fully, and now wasn’t any different.

“I wasn't in Vienna. I don't do that anymore.”  Bucky’s voice wavered slightly, almost pleading with them to believe him. And instantly Katie did.

“They're entering the building. “ Sam urged. 

“Well, the people who think you did are coming here now.” Katie spoke gently as she took a small step forward so that she was slightly in front of Steve. “And they're not planning on taking you alive.”

 “That’s smart. Good strategy.” He looked at her, cocking his head to one side as he studied her. She was oozing confidence, are far cry from the broken, shattered woman he had rescued last year, and she didn’t seem afraid of him. Which he liked but also didn’t because it meant they weren’t going to just let him slip away.

“They're on the roof. I'm compromised!”

"This doesn't have to end in a fight Buck," Steve pleaded desperately while Bucky simply walked over to the table set down his plastic bag and pulled off his glove to reveal his metal hand.

"It always ends in a fight." He said balling the metal into a fist, his voice lilted with sadness.

"Five seconds."

"You pulled me from the river, you saved Katie’s life that day in La Ronde…" Steve’s voice took on an urgent tone, almost shouting. "Why?"

"I don't know." Bucky replied in frustration finally looking up at Steve and locking eyes with him before he glanced to Katie. Truth be told he did know. That day on the Potomac something had broken his programming, and when Steve had plunged to the river he had known he had to save him, because he had been saving him all his punk-assed life. And then with Katie…well, even before he had recognised her he couldn’t leave a dame to the mercy of Hydra, not after what they did to him. It was wrong…his ma taught him better.

"Three seconds."

"Yes you do." Steve responded,

“Breach, breach, breach!” came the yell into their earpieces.

Both Steve and Katie looked towards the window prompting Bucky to do the same and in the next second a flash bomb was thrown through, Steve batted it right back out with his shield and then a second bomb came through the other window. Bucky booted it towards Steve who dropped and covered it with his shield, containing the blast. All three of them looked at one another for a split second before a loud bang sounded as the door rattled. Katie quickly kicked the edge of the table so that it wedged between the door and the wall blocking the German Forces entrance for now.

Whilst she was distracted with that, a final bomb was thrown and Bucky lifted up the dirty mattress using it as protection for them both. She nodded to him gently as he tossed it away and came the soldiers on zip lines through the window. The first landed in the kitchen, training his gun first on Steve, then across towards Bucky, but before he could shoot Steve pulled the rug from beneath him and he ended up firing into the ceiling. The next came in through the window right next to Bucky but he punched him in the face, throwing him over to Katie who aimed a kick at his arm, knocking the gun out of it before kicking him again in the chest, sending him sprawling into the bathroom. Bucky picked the third soldier up easily and slammed him into the wall, letting him fall down.

“Buck, stop! You're gonna kill someone.” Steve ran forward, but Bucky easily dodged him and slammed into him from behind, knocking him to the floor.

“I'm not gonna kill anyone!” he growled, punching a hole into the floor. He grabbed a backpack from under the floorboards and threw it across the room and out of the window. Then came more gun fire and Katie dropped to the floor, rolling to her right and firing a shot in the direction of the shooting hearing a yell as her bullet hit her target in the knee. Steve again flung his shield up and Bucky shoved him hard in the back sending him flying into another solider, taking him down. Katie scrambled to her feet again unable to do anything but watch as Bucky punched a hole through the wall next to the door before bashing it open and continuing to fight his way out.

“You alright?” Steve asked, as she dusted herself off.

“This isn’t exactly going to plan is it?” she asked as they ran out of the door just in time to see Bucky jump on a soldier who was descending from a zip wire and swinging down a level in the stairwell of the apartment block. One of the soldiers was screaming into his radio. Steve grabbed it from him, then smashed it with his foot before he jumped down a level after Bucky. Katie, took the sensible option and ran down the stairs, kicking and punching people blocking her way.

Bucky was punching soldiers left and right until he ducked as he hit another accidentally sending him over the railing, but Steve was quick to catch him by his vest.

“Come on man,” he sighed wearily. Bucky's only response was a shrug which he emphasized by elbowing a soldier that was behind him, while Steve pulled up the one he was holding onto and tossed him into a wall. Bucky jumped over the railing down several flights but by the time Steve caught up with him he had dodged into an apartment and jumped from the railings

“Damned it!” Steve cursed as he watched Bucky land on the lower roof of the neighbouring building with some force, but he simply rolled as if the fall hadn’t bothered him at all, picked up his backpack and ran.  But he didn’t get far, a muscular man clad entirely in black slammed into him from behind knocking him down.

"Sam southwest rooftop." Steve suddenly reported to Sam as he watched the man in the black suit, which looked very much like a big cat moved with breath-taking agility and grace, slashing with sharp claws on each hand as he tackled Bucky.

"Who the hell's the other guy?" Sam asked Steve on the coms.  

“I’m about to find out.” Steve backed up before he too launched himself from the balcony down onto the neighbouring building. Katie ran into the apartment just in time to see him land on the other roof-top and she frowned at the mystery man in some form of cat suit who was lunging at Bucky with his claws. Bucky grabbed his wrists holding him off but at that moment a helicopter that had appeared began to fire its machine gun. Both Katie from her vantage point, and Steve who was bolting towards the men, frowned as he saw the ammo ping back off the man’s suit just like it did off his shield.

“Sam…” Katie said as Steve continued to run towards Bucky, shield raised. Sam understood what she was implying instantly.  

“Got him.” He replied, flying down he spun under the chopper, grabbing the rails at the bottom, spinning it off course before swooping off. As Katie continued to watch Bucky leapt off the side of the roof to the floor, and the mystery cat man followed using his claws for traction down the side of the building. Steve was shortly behind, rolling along the floor before picking himself up and running after the pair of them, Sam flying behind. Then, the helicopter began to follow, gunfire tearing up the side walk.  

“Shit.” Katie said, running down and emerging into the street, sprinting as fast as she could. Spotting an abandoned motorbike which had been ditched in the fracas she hopped on and sped after them, mentally thanking Natasha for the bike driving lessons.

It was chaos, absolute chaos. Bucky jumped down through a gap into the underpass, Steve and the mystery cat man following, as they themselves were being pursued by an armoured vehicle. Well, at least they were until Steve managed to pull the driver out and take the vehicle himself. He saw a motorbike coming up behind him in the mirrors and did a double take as he saw it was Katie. She pulled up alongside him and with one hand she grabbed the passenger door and yanked it open, before placing both her hands on the rim of the door and using it as leverage to swing herself feet first into the car.

“Where did you learn to do that?” Steve asked, open mouthed as she dropped into the seat next to him.

“Nat.” she shrugged, as if it was a perfectly normal thing to do or be taught. Steve gave a small smirk and then turned to look back at the road, switching lanes and cruising past mystery cat man.  Then there was a thud and Katie glanced back over her shoulders. Mystery cat man had latched himself onto the back of the car.

“Hold on…” Steve warned before swerving the car to the right then the left hoping to dislodge him but no such luck. He even rammed the side of the car into another Special Forces vehicle but nothing, he hung tight.

"Sam we can't shake this guy." Steve reported.

"Right behind you."

In front of them Bucky jumped the barrier to the other side of the road so Steve dropped the car a gear and pressed harder on the gas, breaking straight through it. A quick glance through the mirrors told Katie that it was enough to slow down the Germans but not to dislodge mystery cat man.

“This guy is more of a pain in the ass than Tony.” Katie sighed, turning back to look out of the front. Just as she did, Bucky clearly decided he needed his own mode of transportation and grabbed the handle bars of a motorbike which was speeding towards him. He dislodged the driver in mid-air while the bike spun and threw his leg over the seat all in one fluid motion. He then landed and sped away.

"Holy shit!" Katie let out a small laugh of disbelief, her jaw dropping slightly as she smirked at Bucky’s unbelievable display of acrobatics. “Did you see that?”

Steve looked at her for a split second, taking in the smirk on her face as she admired Bucky’s agility, surprised to feel he was slightly jealous. With a sigh, more at himself than anything, he shook his head. That insecure little kid from Brooklyn really had picked the most inappropriate time to appear. It didn’t help when she spoke again, a cheeky lilt to her voice.

“Can you do that?”

Steve shot her a glare that would make anyone else shake in their boots but it made Katie do nothing but frown at the open display of hostility he very rarely used on her. Before she could respond, however, there was a thud on the roof as mystery cat man climbed on top of the car and then launched himself at Bucky. The soldier on the bike was prepared though, and grabbed him around the throat, flinging him over his head. But the mystery cat man was persistent, hanging on even as the bike tipped and Bucky was forced to use his metal hand so that he didn't fall off the bike completely. He kicked the cat man away before straightening his bike and speeding ahead.

Steve swerved to avoid running mystery cat man over while he caught other means of transportation, meaning he grabbed onto Sam's legs as he was flying by. Ahead of them Bucky threw a sticky bomb at the top of the overpass which immediately went off and began raining down debris.  

“Time to go…” Steve muttered, grabbing Katie as he slammed on the breaks turning the car sharply. He pulled her out of the door, using his shield to land on as the car began to tilt on its side. They dodged through the rubble, Steve’s shield over their heads,  and once they were clear Steve sped off to where the cat man was mounted on top of Bucky ready to rip his throat out.

Sam emerged from the dust but seconds later there was loud clang and War Machine landed holding up his hand with repulsor beams at the ready in warning. More German Special Forces arrived and they knew the game was up. But Steve and Katie both looked at each other, chests heaving with exertion and dare they say it, relief. They had located Bucky, finally, he was still alive, and could be questioned, which meant there was a chance they could clear all this up.

Steve felt Bucky step forward, and he instantly held his arm out to stop him. .

"Stand down now." Rhodey spoke with authority and the Special Forces aimed their guns at them all. Steve relented placing his shield onto his back harness showing compliance as he held his hands up, palms outwards.

"Congratulations Cap, you're a criminal." Rhodey said sarcastically. As soldiers surrounded Bucky forcing him down to his knees so they could hand cuff him tightly.

Katie and Sam raised their hands in surrender as the soldiers approached them too. The mystery cat man was the last to comply retracting his claws and reaching up to his helmet.

“Stand down Rhodey!” Katie looked at him, nodding to the soldier who had his gun trained on her “We’ll come quietly…”

Rhodey turned to look at her and then nodded at the officer nearest her, who lowered his gun, but that didn’t stop them from handcuffing her. As she shot a look over her shoulder at the man who was slapping on the restraints she gave him a small smirk and then turned back to look at mystery cat man, just as he pulled off his mask.

“What the…” Katie said, recognising him instantly. It was T’Challa, the prince of Wakanda.

“Your highness” Rhodey said.

There was a scuffle to Katie’s right and she turned to see that Bucky was being hauled to the floor.

“Don’t hurt him.” She turned to Rhodey, pleading with him “He saved my life, he’s still a human being.”

Rhodey hesitated slightly but then one of the soldiers shoved Katie in the back.

“You…move.” he said in a thick accent.

“Say please.” She spun round, glaring at him. “Fucking asshole…”

“Katie.” Steve instructed gently as he walked towards her, being marched by 2 other soldiers. She turned to him and he gave a small shake of his head, warning her not to start another fight, before he nodded towards the black SUV.

“You know what the worse bit about all this is?” Katie said, as she fell into step beside Steve.

Steve looked at her, “No, what?”

“The lecture I’m going to get off Tony.” she groaned.

One they had been stripped of their weapons and gear they were released from their handcuffs. Rubbing her wrists, Katie raised an eyebrow at Rhodey.

“Now what?” 

“You’ll be given chance to change and clean up before going to Berlin,” Rhodey said, as the side of the SUV they were by opened and they were instructed to climb in. “into the custody of the Anti-Terrorism Unit.”

“So we’re terrorists now?” Katie snorted.

“You knew what would happen if you went against the law.”

She gave a sarcastic, fake yawn and behind her Sam sniggered before he looked at Rhodey

“This make you feel good?” Sam asked.

“Ok, stop it!” Steve loudly shut down the petty squabble that was about to erupt between the two men “Yes, Rhodey we knew what would happen, but we also knew what would happen if we didn’t.”

“Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

“That you would never have taken him alive…” he nodded to where Bucky was being hauled into the back of a separate vehicle. “And you know that too.”

******

"So you like cats?"

"Sam." Steve scolded as Katie snorted, looking out of the window of the SUV as they drove over a bridge that crossed the River Spree. T’Challa was on the front row of the SUV alone, then Steve and Katie had sat on the middle, Sam on the back row.

"What?" Sam asked innocently. "Dude shows up dressed like a cat and you don't wanna' know more?"

Katie was inclined to agree, Steve however, was curious about something else.

"Your suit. It's Vibranium?" he asked in interest.

"The Black Panther has been the protector of Wakanda for generations." T'Challa began slowly. "A mantle passed from warrior to warrior. And now because your friend murdered my father, I also wear the mantle of king. So I ask you, as both warrior and king, how long do you think you can keep your friend safe from me?"

T'Challa turned his head to look Steve directly in the eye then turned back around without another word as Steve clenched his jaw.

They arrived at the CIA base in Berlin in record time thanks to the police convey that kept the streets clear. The base was crawling with heavily armed soldiers as they stepped out of the van and were led inside. Katie shrugged on her leather jacket, pausing as Bucky's cage followed them being moved by a small forklift. Besides her Steve stiffened as he looked over at Bucky and Katie gently placed her hand on at the bottom of his back. Bucky looked at the pair of them before he turned away as he was taken off in a separate direction.

After an introduction of sorts to Thaddeus Ross (Sharon’s boss) they were informed their weapons would be placed in a lock up, prompting Sam to snarl angrily- "I better not look out the window and see anybody flying around in that." They were then led over a walkway and Katie looked past Ross and saw a familiar redhead walking towards them. Natasha's face was blank as she strode down the walkway.

"For the record." she snapped as she looked at the 3 of them in turn before she focussed on Steve. "This is what making things worse looks like."

"He's alive." Steve answered shortly, not looking at her as he walked past, his jacket flapping slightly, pulling Katie with him as his hand wrapped around hers.

She just glared at him before she walked quicker, pulling ahead of the group as they reached a large security office. Natasha led the way in, and Katie instantly picked up as she could hear Tony's voice from inside,

"The remaining of us are now at court-section." he was saying. And as they entered she saw her brother standing in the centre of the office, talking into his phone with his back to the door as he added, "And, Colonel Ross is supervising the clean-up."

Despite everything Katie felt a rush of relief, it good to see him, alive and ok after Vienna.

“Try not to break anything while we fix this." Natasha snapped and Katie’s attention then turned from her brother to her friend and she shook her head.

“Ass kissing doesn’t suit you,Nat.”  

Tony turned to face them all, his face set in a deep frown as he barked into his phone, pulling at his tie to loosen it off. "Consequences? You bet there will be consequences."

Steve raised his eyebrows slightly, glancing at Katie who rolled her eyes before she looked at Tony as he continued to talk “Obviously you can quote me on that because I just said it. Anything else? Thank you, sir."

He tipped his head to look at Katie “You ok?”

She nodded and stepped forwards into his arms, giving him a hug which he returned.

"Consequences?" Steve repeated with a smirk as Tony looked over Katie’s head at him.

"Secretary Ross wants you three prosecuted." Tony answered, stepping back and releasing Katie "I had to give him something." He added.

"I'm not getting that shield back, am I?" Steve asked in an almost monotone voice.

"Technically, it's the government's property." Natasha said cheerily. "Wings too." She added.

"That's cold." Sam countered

"Warmer than jail." Tony tossed over his shoulder, as he headed off somewhere.

“Stop being so melodramatic.” Katie rolled her eyes, and stuck her hands in the back pockets of her jeans as Natasha led them to an office. They walked in silence, none of them responding to anything Natasha said. Eventually they reached a glass walled office and stepped inside.

“You’re not in a very talkative mood I can see.” Natasha said as Katie dropped her jacket over the back of a chair.

“Hmmm what can we talk about?Let’s see.” Katie looked at her “Oh how about the Accords?” Natasha rolled her eyes as Katie continued “You know, I never had you down as someone that would give in so easily to control.”

"Well sometimes we have to make some tough choices." She shrugged

“Why'd you really sign Nat?" Steve asked her.

She sighed leaning back on the door frame. “Loyalty. Loyalty to our team. Staying together is more important than how we stay together.”

Steve shook his head, giving a small snort of laughter. “I don’t agree Nat, and deep down, I don’t think you do either.”

“Believe what you want.” she shrugged before leaving.

About half an hour later after the 3 of them had been brainstorming again who they thought was actually responsible for bombing the UN and trying to fit Bucky up (none of them having any sensible ideas whatsoever) Sam excused himself heading off in search of some food and drink and it wasn’t long before Tony walked into the office were Katie and Steve were sat, Katie’s feet resting in Steve’s lap, his hand sliding up the bottom of her jeans, stroking the smooth skin just above the line of her ankle boots.

“You wanna see something cool?” he asked. Katie and Steve both turned to look at him as he walked in, holding a small black case. “I pulled something from Dad’s archives.” He nodded, “Timely.”

Katie sat up as Tony tossed his suit jacket onto one of the empty seats before he opened the box and placed it down on the shiny, mahogany table in front of Steve.

"FDR signed the Land-Lease bills with these in 1941." Tony explained what they were. "Provided support to the allies when they needed it the most."

"Some would say it brought our country closer to war." Steve countered, a humourless smile on his face as he looked back up at Tony.

Tony met Steve's eyes evenly and countered with his own point, "See, if not for these, you wouldn't be here." Steve's brow rose, while Tony continued, "I'm trying to, what do you call it? An olive branch. Is that what you call it?

He looked at Steve, leaning his face against his fist as he waited expectantly. Steve pursed his lips unhappily and Katie knew he was struggling and couldn't tell Tony what he wanted to hear because he didn't believe in it.

"Is Pepper here?" Katie asked, switching topics as she glanced around the office then added, "I didn't see her."

She looked back at Tony as a strange almost regretful look came over his face. Her brows furrowed in confusion as Tony said slowly, measured, "We are... kinda, well not kinda-"

"Pregnant?" Steve interrupted in surprise.

"No, definitely not." Tony said immediately face souring slightly. He paused, before finally admitting the truth, "We're taking a break. It's nobody's fault."

"I'm so sorry, Tony." Steve spoke softly as Katie looked at her brother, who took a seat at the table “I didn’t know.”

“What did you do this time?” Katie asked gently. She hated it when they rowed and broke up. It never lasted long but still…

Tony's lips twitched like he was going to smile but didn't, "Few years ago, I almost lost her, so I trashed all my suits. Then, we had to mop up Hydra. And then Ultron," he tapped himself in the chest, "my fault." He sighed again. "And then, and then, and then- I never stopped. Cause the truth is, I don't wanna stop but I don't want to lose her. I thought maybe the Accords could split the difference."

"In her defence, you are a handful." Katie said, the corner of her mouth twitching upwards.

Tony smiled without it reaching his eyes as he stuffed his hands into his pockets, pacing a little by the glass walls, before he reached up to adjust his tie as he continued bitterly.

"Yet, dad was a pain in the ass, but he and mom always made it work."

"You know, I'm glad Howard got married.” Steve said, fondly remembering his friend with a smile “I only knew him when he was young and single."

"Oh really?" Tony asked sarcastically as he looked back at Steve. "You two knew each other? He never mentioned that. Maybe only a thousand times."

Steve winced, dropping his head and while Tony picked up his suit jacket. "God, I hated you." He spat pulling the jacket on.

“That’s a dick thing to say, Tone!” Katie frowned, narrowing her eyes at her brother.  

Steve sighed, and he looked back at Tony with sad eyes, "I don't mean to make things difficult."

“No, you just dropped into my life and married my sister.” Tony snorted “But you’re a very polite person. I mean you asked first.”

“Ok, that’s enough.” Katie chastised as Tony walked behind Steve, pacing a little. Steve turned to keep his eyes on him as he sighed

"If I see a situation pointed south, I can't ignore it. Sometime I wish I could."

"No, you don't." Tony challenged

Steve paused, before he admitted with a small, wry smile shaking his head a little, "No, I don't." He sighed, "Sometimes-"

"Sometimes I wanna punch you in your perfect teeth." Tony interrupted bitterly. He shrugged like it was a fact, before he added softly "But I don't wanna see you gone. We need you, Cap."

Steve stared at Tony as he considered his words, Katie observing the two of them silently as Tony continued "So far, nothing's happened that can't be undone, if you just sign." He gestured at the pens, "We can make the last 24 hours legit. Barnes gets transferred to an American psych centre instead of a Wakanda prison."

Steve stared at the pens, weighing Tony's words before he reached out, pulling one slowly from its holder. Tony folded his arms across his chest as Steve stood up playing with the pen in his hands.

“I’m not saying it's impossible,” he took a deep breath, “but there would have to be safeguards, what do you think sweetheart?” He looked at Katie. He was trying here, after everything, to reach the middle ground. He didn’t want to see the Avengers split up and the opportunity of keeping Bucky out of jail and safe was one he couldn’t pass up.

Katie looked at him, searching his face. She hadn’t been completely opposed to some form of sanctions after all, what she had opposed vehemently was the ones being force upon them as they gave them no control…but maybe, as Steve pointed out, with some amendments perhaps they could make this work.

“We need to be able to have some control Tony, a say in where we go, when we go and why we go.” Katie said eventually, looking at her brother. “We’re not to be used as some pawns in a political game, for anyone’s agenda.”

"Sure." Tony was quick to assure. "Once we put out the PR fire, its documents they can be amended." Tony sat back down at the table “I'd file a motion to have you and Wanda reinstated and-."

"Wanda?" Katie cut him off and looked at him “What about Wanda?”

"She's fine." Tony promised, although wariness leaked into his tone because he knew he had just put his foot in it. "She's confined in the compound currently. Vision's keeping her company."

"Oh God, Tony!" Katie said, groaning and throwing her head backwards in exasperation and disbelief.

At the same time Steve scoffed and shook his head. "Every time. Every time I think you're seeing things the right way-”

"What?" Tony cut in, "It's a 100 acres with a lap pool. It's got a screening room. Trust me, there's worse ways to protect people."

"Protection?" Steve repeated, his temper rising "Is that how you see this? This is protection? It's internment."

"She’s not a US citizen-" Tony spoke loudly while Steve and Katie groaned again

"Oh, come on, Tony!"  Katie shook her head, looking at him.

"- and they don't grant visas to Weapons of Mass Destruction." Tony finished taking a deep breath

"Wanda's a kid!" Steve spat out.

"Give me a break!" Tony shouted back angrily.

Katie’s eyes narrowed furiously, but Tony took another deep breath as he visibly tried to calm himself down,

"I'm doing what has to be done," He paused to look Steve in the eye before he turned to his sister and finished flatly. "To stave off something worse."

She shook her head and grit her teeth, there was no discussing with him when he was like this, and if he couldn’t see that keeping Wanda on house arrest because she hadn’t signed was wrong then she didn’t really want to discuss it with him anyway.  "You keep telling yourself that."  she answered.

"Hate to break up the set." Steve said dropping the pen back down onto the desk before he left the office.

Katie groaned and banged her head on the desk.

“Kiddo...”

“Just don’t.” she said, not looking up “Don’t say a word Tony, you’ve already said enough.”

****

"The receipt for your gear."  Sharon walked into the room, handing Sam a piece of paper.

Sam took the paper, glancing down at it. "'Bird costume'? Come on, girl." he spat incredulously reading the receipt.

"I didn't write it." Sharon shot back. Katie raised a brow as she watched Sharon, noticing her movements before she reached past Sam and pressed a button in the middle of the conference table. Instantly the audio from the footage they were watching of Bucky’s questioning flooded the room and Steve looked at Sharon in surprise and she nodded back to him. Katie also gave her a look of appreciation as well and Sharon averted her eyes beyond the conference room. Katie followed her gaze and saw Natasha looking furtively over her shoulder. Katie nodded to Nat, understanding instantly she’d had a hand in this. Nat inclined her head slightly before she turned back around to watch her own set of screens.

"I'm not here to judge you. I just want to ask you a few questions. Do you know where you are, James?" The man in the cage gave no response so the doctor tried again. "I can't help you if you don't talk to me, James."

"My name is Bucky." Bucky answered voice rough, a hint of defiance in his tone.

Steve's lips pursed, and he turned back to the table with a frown. He picked up the discarded file, pulling out the Vienna security camera photos that showed the man the task force identified as Bucky from near the bomb site.

"Why would the task force release this photo to begin with?" Steve asked handing the picture over to Katie, as she perched on the table beside him.

Sam frowned, while Sharon shrugged and answered the best way she could, "Get the word out, involve as many eyes as we can?"

"Right." Steve said flatly nodding but it wasn't enough for him. Katie cottoned on instantly.

"It's a good way to flush a guy out of hiding. Set off a bomb, get your picture taken." she said and Sam's eyes narrowed as he leaned forward on his arms, while Steve continued for her.

"Suddenly you've got 7 billion people looking for the Winter Soldier."

"You're saying someone framed him to find him." Sharon said slowly summarizing their point.

"Steve, we looked for the guy for two years and bar when he pulled Nova out of that Hydra base we found nothing." Sam pointed out.

"We didn't bomb the UN." Katie answered. "That turns a lot of heads."

"Yeah," Sharon joined in quietly, "but that doesn't guarantee that whoever framed him would get him, it guarantees that we would…”

She trailed off as all 4 of them shared an understanding glance.

Steve turned around sharply to look back at the screen showing Bucky and the UN psychiatrist, before he muttered "Yeah." Someone had brought him here for a reason. Who, and why?

"Tell me Bucky." The man interrogating Bucky continued on. "You've seen a great deal, haven't you?"

"I don't want to talk about it." Bucky answered flatly keeping his response short.

"You feel that, if you open your mouth, the horrors might never stop. Don't worry." He tapped at his screen "We only have to talk about one."

The building suddenly went dark, the power going out leaving on the emergency red lights flashing ominously. Katie hopped off the table and Steve turned urgent eyes on Sharon.

"Sub-level 5, east wing." She answered the silent question quickly.

Steve looked at Sam and he nodded then the three of them ran out of the office, using the distraction of the power outage to their advantage as they raced down the stairs to get to the level Bucky was on.

They ran down two flights of stairs before they finally reached the hallway that led to Bucky's holding room. Steve stopped when they reached the last corridor and spotted the guards lying on the ground. He glanced back to exchange looks with Katie and Sam as they both came to a stop behind him. Now wary of what they were walking into, and highly conscious that none of them had any weapons, they made their way cautiously down the corridor. Katie bent down to check the fallen soldiers. 1 had a strong pulse, the other…

“He’s dead.” she muttered looking up. Steve let out a sigh of frustration and moved into the security room besides the cell, Sam and Katie close behind.  

The further into the room they went the more dead soldiers they encountered when a sudden raspy voice came from in the room that held Bucky's containment unit. "Help me."

Steve looked ahead to see the man who had been interrogating Bucky, lying on his side by the empty cage, clutching his side as if in pain. Steve stomped into the room angrily, ignoring the man as he begged for help again.

"Get up." He snapped reaching down to grab the man by the front of his jacket, hauling him to his feet. The man eyed him carefully as Steve glared shoving him into a wall and snarling. "Who are you? What do you want?"

The man met his gaze, his eyes becoming cold and dark as answered lowly, "To see an empire fall."

A movement in the corner of the room caught Katie’s eye. Sam and her ducked just in time as the Winter Soldier leapt from where he had been lurking in the shadows, throwing a punch towards Katie. He missed, hitting the concrete doorway and punching a hole through the rock.

Sam acted quickly, punching at the Winter Soldier's side, but it didn't even faze the super-solider as he punched Sam straight in the stomach. Sam winced, and doubled over as the Winter Soldier grabbed his chin in his metal hand, throwing him across the room. He then turned his attention to Katie, and she knew that throwing punches wasn’t going to work so all she could do was duck, using her agility to keep out of his way. She bent backwards as he made to grab her but then Steve ran at him, ducking as the Winter Soldier swung his arm out. Once the metal arm passed over his head, Steve threw a punch of his own, hitting the Soldier right in the face, and the man snarled as he swung his fist back at Steve, who dodged it. The Winter Soldier suddenly kicked out, landing a solid kick right in Steve's stomach and Steve grunted as he was thrown backwards, landing in the security room.

The Winter Soldier strode towards him, Steve was already back on his feet and blocked the next kick with his bare hands. Katie was powerless to help; she had nothing on her, no stingers, no guns no Supernova suit. She frantically searched the room for something she could use as a weapon as the pair of super soldiers continued to fight, throwing kicks and punches while parrying and blocking the other's moves, heading back out into the corridor. As Steve fell through the doorway again, Katie grabbed the cable she was holding and launched herself at the Winter Soldier jumping onto his back and wrapping the cable around his neck. He spun round angrily, grabbing at the cable before he reached up with his metal arm and grabbed the back of her hair, flipping her up and over before flinging her across the room at Steve who had pulled himself up against the elevator doors. Steve grunted as he caught her but quickly set her on her feet before shoving her out of the way just in time, as the Winter Soldier shoved his whole weight into a punch to Steve's chest, blowing him straight through the metal doors and down the elevator shaft.

Katie kicked at the desk in front of her, sending it his way as he was now advancing but he broke through it easily; it didn’t even slow him in the slightest. She dodged under his arm and aimed a kick at the side of his knee, catching him perfectly and he stumbled forward. She then went to kick him again and he raised his metal arm to take the brunt of it, catching her leg so it was trapped between his arm and chest.

“Bucky this isn’t you…” her words meant nothing to him. He grabbed a handful of her shirt with his other hand lifting her and tossing her like a rag doll straight into the wall where she banged her head painfully, causing her to see stars. She lay still for a while, dazed but and then she heard Sam shout

“Hey...” Then he was by her side "You alright?"

“I think so.” she said groggily as Sam gently helped her to her feet. Everything seemed to work.

"C'mon," Sam said, heading towards the stairs “That so called doctor just left.”

Before Katie could head up the steps after him, a grunt caught her attention, it was Steve climbing his way out of the elevator shaft covered in dirt and sweat and looking far more attractive than he had any right to be in the middle of a damned fight.

“You ok?” he questioned only slightly out of breath from the climb, his hand dropping to his wife’s neck

“Yeah.” she nodded,

“Bucky?” he asked.

"He went that way.” she said pointing to the corridor on the left, "Back out to the facility. The doctor, he went the other way, Sam’s gone after him"

Steve quickly nodded "I'll get Bucky and met you outside."

No further discussion was had as they split up.  By the time Katie emerged into the lobby of the facility it was utter chaos where employees were all crushed together rushing to get out the doors and get to safety.

“Sam, any sign?” she asked as she found him outside looking round.

“No, come on.” he grabbed her hand so that they didn't lose each other in the crowd too as they moved outside the building. Sam stopped to pick up a discarded jacket and Katie glanced down at it before looking around the crowd. There was no sign. It was then that she heard a chopper and instantly glanced up to the top of the building where a helicopter was attempting to take off. But the two-hundred plus pounds of super-solider hanging onto the landing skids was not letting go that easy. He kept hold as the helicopter dragged him to the edge, his boots skidding on the Heli-pad before he reached the end. Gritting his teeth he clung onto the skids of the helicopter with one hand, the other onto the railing of the building.

“No way.” Sam said as he and Katie stood looking up at Steve who was stopping the helicopter “No goddamned way…”

The blades of the helicopter spun rapidly but it was going nowhere as Steve switched his grip on the railing. His muscles bulged and felt like they were on fire but he didn’t let go and with a pained grit of his teeth he pulled even harder and felt it start to come back to him. Then it did a sharp turn towards Steve and he dived out of the way as it came to a stop. He stood up, made his way to the door but before he could do anything Bucky had smashed through the glass on the door and gripped him round his neck. Steve planted both his feet on the door, trying to release himself from the grip but it was no use. And then the helicopter began sliding.

Katie’s grip tightened around Sam’s hand as they spotted Steve's figure still attached to the helicopter as it fell from the top of the building and into the lake. She instantly rushed forwards, but Sam wrapped both arms around her waist to restrain her, stopping her from diving head first into the water after him. Not again, she kept thinking to herself, the scenes from the last time him and Bucky had entered the water flashing before her eyes.

She hadn’t realised she was yelling until Sam shouted loudly, and pointed across the water, where a head had broken the surface. Steve was dragging Bucky up beside him. They rushed to the edge of the river where Steve made sure they got Bucky out first before Steve hauled himself up beside them.

Sam turned his attention to Bucky making sure he was only unconscious and still breathing while Katie’s focus turned to her husband. The anger at him being a stupid, reckless moron again boiled over.

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND?!” she screamed at him before she reached back and slapped him hard across the face.  It was enough to make his head snap to the right.

“Ouch.” Sam muttered.

Steve looked at Katie, astonishment and maybe a hint of amusement on his face before she threw herself into his arms, not caring that he was soaking wet whilst as he wrapped his arms around her underneath Sam's jacket.

“You stupid…” she began to sob, her voice muffled as she pressed her face into his wet shirt and his hands tangled in her hair

"I know, I know." He muttered "I'm sorry baby.” he said, dropping a soft kiss to her head before he gently moved her to the side and looked at Sam before nodding to the unconscious Bucky on the floor. “Let’s get out of here.”

 Tags

@the-omni-princess

@momobaby227

@geekofmanythings16

@angelofhell-666​

@thewackywriter

@marvelfansworld

@cobalt-gear

[liw-the-melancholic-apple]

How it may have gone - Humble Beginnings

A fic taking place in the marauders era. While the political climate seems to head to a conflict, James, Sirius, Remus and Peter are still just teenagers. Dealing with typical teenage problems.

But this year their little group grows. Who would have known that more prefects would be a good thing?

Masterlist

Ten: Detention III

When I came back to Greenhouse 4 the next day around the same time a new list lay on the first workstation. Next to it I found the lower section of the one I had worked off of yesterday. The little facts about the plants and creatures were apparently mine to keep. I folded that piece of parchment and put it in my bag.

Then I unfolded the new list.

To Do – Day 2

Behind the bumblebush by the desks you’ll find a door. I houses the supplies and tools. It’s not locked, grab whatever you need.

One table over is a stack of books that tells you what you need to know about the various plants and animals.

Feed the Abtu in the river 

Check elderly mandrakes for signs of life (or death)

Water nettles, beets and tea (green, white and black)

Cut eight branches of Dittany 

Wear gloves !!! and collect Streeler slime.

The Chameleon Potion is a very advanced one but it is one of the most powerful ways of disguise. In contrast to polyjuice potion which lets the drinker only turn into one person, of whom a ‘piece’ is required as an ingredient, which poses its own risks and obstacles, the Chameleon potion enables the drinker to practically become a metamorphmagi for at least two hours after consumption.

Nettles, beets and tealeaves (fresh or dried) are basic ingredients in a lot of potions. Nettles are mostly used in healing potions to provide the best starting points for the more magical ingredients. Not a single common healing potion is brewed without nettles! Beets are mostly used for colour in cosmetic applications. White, Green and Black Tea all have different properties that are released when put in hot water. Those properties often react with more magical plants like devil’s snare or moon dew to bring the potion to full potential.

When dittany is boiled and reduced, then combined with liquid silver it becomes a paste that is a very powerful cure against werewolves bites, called Lykoiaomai. This is the full recipe: Boil and reduce dittany leaves, strain the liquid to rid it of all solids and stir it into a liquid but slightly cooled silver. The ratio is one tablespoon of liquid silver to five tablespoons of dittany reduction.

When dried over a moderate flame Streeler slime turns into thin transparent gelatinous sheets, that can be dissolved in hot water. Dissolve the sheets in white tea as a cure for sleep deprivation.

Again, with the factoids… While the last ones seemed random these appeared to be a little more tailored to my situation. Mainly because of the werewolf and sleep deprivation. Full moon would be tomorrow. All of the Gryffindor boys would be completely destroyed on Thursday, if I could find dried sheets of Streeler Slime in Slughorn’s shelves, I might just take them to see whether they worked as well as pepper up potion.

While Sirius was right and there were no side-effects to using the potion it was pretty hard to get a hold of and expensive to buy. If the giant slugs provided an alternative I could see myself nicking  some jars of their slime before detention was over. It would be helpful to the boys and to Crick and me. Just yesterday the next month of nightshifts had been figured out and I was serving at least one a week, not one on the weekends. Crick had had a similar fate while Jonas got way too many Saturdays to his name. Anything that would get me through a day of classes after a nightshift was absolutely worth breaking the rules for.

On the other hand, Sprout had never once said that I wasn’t allowed to take anything from the greenhouse. Obviously I could assume that nothing was to leave the treehouse but nobody had officially forbidden it.

I got to work and finished a bit quicker than the day before. One of the mandrakes didn’t react to anything I did to it, so I assumed it to be dead and put it on the table with a note. I thought it smart to let everybody know that I wasn’t sure what a dead mandrake looked like. Just in case this one was just really old and moved so slowly I didn’t realise it. The last thing I needed was to get in trouble while serving detention.

After I placed the dittany branches on top of the books I walked back into the shed and looked through the Potions section. I found two interesting things: There were a lot of sheets of Streeler slime and there were about 12 glasses of Dittany-Silver-Paste. They were labelled with dates. All of which lay in the future. One of which was tomorrow.

I had thrown myself in a homework marathon yesterday night and written my essay on the significance of Venus in relation to death for the Thursday class. Normally I couldn’t be bribed to research astronomical deteails outside of class or homework. It was one of those subjects whose importance to general magical education I understood – unlike divination – but I really wasn’t all that interested in it. Yesterday however, I had broken out my moon chart for the decade and checked the dates of full moons. I had made a list and pinned it into my wardrobe, just so I was prepared for a weak and sickly looking Remus and a grumpy Potter-posse. Aside from that, I had a feeling that the other boys were stupid enough to hang out with Remus after he had transformed and I wanted to be able to run to their rescue when something happened.

The dates on the glasses of anti-werewolf-bite-cream were all full moon dates. Seeing how Remus didn’t need a specific potion to be healed, even if he bit himself, because he already was a werewolf and didn’t get affected by the poison in his own fangs, the existence of all of these jars seemed to proof my theory that my stupid, stupid friends did regularly lounge with a transformed werewolf. And that the school knew.

While making these observations I found one glass with a December date. The 26th, to be exact. Remus would have been with his parents during the holidays, so this one went unused. Then, again, I doubted that every other jar of this stuff had been used. Did it maybe spoil quickly? Maybe, but not very likely. There were jars labelled for next November. I went back out into the bright garden and checked the special edition book on uncommon healing potions. I had a section Dittany, the recipe for the cream and stated that it was good for roughly ten years.

So, maybe the teachers relabelled the jars after every full moon that went well. I could safely assume that every single one of these jars was good to go in case of an emergency. And that it would be for couple of years. After all Remus had only started school five and a half years ago. And I doubted, that we had more than one werewolf on campus.

I struggled with my conscience and I didn’t feel good about it. But I went back into the shed, ripped the label off the December jar and put it into my bag. Just in case I really needed to run to anybody’s rescue. When I left I felt really guilty but I also reckoned I could talk myself out of the situation if it ever came to light. 

We were all pretty nervous on Wednesday. It was our first full moon. And even though we weren’t going to actually be around Remus during the night, all of us girls were hyper aware of Remus’ bad shape and what would happen at night. I was glad that we went on revising spells in Charms class that morning. That way nobody noticed how little I could concentrate. Transfiguration went fairly well, too, as it was a theoretical class and I only needed to write down notes. I did, however, pull myself together to write them completely, detailed and legible because Milla was an absolute wreck at this point. Yes, her feelings for Remus weren’t influenced by the fact that he was a werewolf but the thought of every bone in his body breaking horrified her for him. Her voice was shaky all day and it sounded like she could start crying any second. Needless to say that she didn’t take any notes at all during McGonnagal’s monologue.

“Please, keep me away from Remus!”, she begged when we crossed the foyer for lunch. “Or at least don’t let me talk to him. He already looks like death and I don’t think my state would help that at all.”

“Sure thing. We’ll distract him.”

We did. Quite successfully. By now the others knew what my detention consisted of exactly and I decided to tell the entire group about my recent venture into thieving.

“Point is, that I have that stuff. I don’t hope you’ll ever need it but in all honesty if you should ever need it, it’s probably better if you have it with you rather than it sitting in my night stand”, I whispered while smoking.

“You stole Slughorn’s supply from a restricted area of the school? You sure you’re still you, Goods?”

“Fairly certain, yeah. Honestly, I’d rather lose my badge and serve detention for the next two years, than live through the nightmare of something happening to any of you.”

“I’m with Jette”, Remus agreed strongly. Well, as strongly as he possibly could. Milla was right, saying he looked like death. His skin was basically see-through and the dark circles under his eyes nearly reached his upper lip.

“I’m not myself. What if I do bite one of you?”, his voice got a little shaky and I had the distinct impression that that had nothing to do with his physical condition.

“You haven’t yet, Remus”, James tried to calm him down, with a pad on the shoulder.

“First time for everything”, Remus half-smiled in response.

“Just take it!”, I shoved the jar in Peter’s hands. “If you never need it, I’ll be heavenly happy, but if you do need it and don’t have access to it I’ll kill myself over it. And so will Remus. So, don’t argue!”

We sent them off to their classes and descended to the dungeons to learn something or other about fever-reducing-potions. Blair took care of her cauldron that she shared with Millla and the one that Chloe and Nica were supposed to brew in, while Joe was absolutely on his own with ours. I’d told him that I wasn’t on my A-game and could barely concentrate and being the wonderful person he was, he took it upon himself to just do the potion on his own, allowing me to lift. I had to promise that I’d help him out in Defence, though. And I was more than willing to pay that price.

When I got to the treehouse that afternoon I was met by Professor Slughorn. Oh. Not good.

“Miss de Witt. How nice. I thought it useful to talk you through some of the ingredients we have you collect and store. While I’m aware that Professor Sprout provided you with the books and some additional information, I’d like for you to know a little more. You up for it?”

“Certainly, Professor.” Maybe he hadn’t noticed that I nicked his December jar.

“Very well. We will get to the Dittany you collected yesterday. First, you should feed the animals. I’ll set up over there.” He pointed at the tables and pulled out a collapsible cauldron. I scanned my list for the day that just told me to feed the fish and lay out some hay for whatever other creature. I did both those things, visited the mandrakes, who were all still alive and returned to the table.

The Dittany branches were already in the cauldron and a shimmery, shiny substance sat atop a different fire. Shimmery, shiny and silver. Maybe he had noticed that I nicked the jar.

“Now, I’m sure you can guess what we’re doing today.”

“The potion – paste – that Professor Sprout wrote about. The one that heals werewolf bites?”

“Excellent. Five points to Hufflepuff.”

“Oh, thank you, Sir.”

“Now, I’m aware you don’t like potionmaking all that much. Contrasting your brother, who is still doing brilliantly.”

“Happy to hear that, Sir.”

“But with your strong suit being Defence against the Dark Arts, I don’t think that it would be crazy to assume you at least think about working in theat field. I would favour you for an auror but obviously you might end up a curse breaker, a member of the department for magical law or a dejinxer at St. Mungo’s. Every single one of these professions is connected to potions and potionmaking in one way or another. And if you’d ever want to apply to the auror training programme you need to have achieved an A at least in your NEWTs. So, I thought we’d try to install some interest in you by meeting here every now and again during your detention to work on interesting and practical potions. Would you be okay with that?”

“Of couse, Sir. Thank you. This is probably the best opportunity anybody has ever gotten by getting detention.”

“Well, I personally don’t agree with your actions, Miss de Witt. But I also don’t agree with those of my own students.” I had fully forgotten that Slughorn was Slytherin Head of House.

“What Messrs Black and Mulciber said and did does not represent my house. I trust you know that. And I don’t want you to miss opportunities over a throw-away nasty comment.”

“Thank you, Professor. I appreciate that. A lot. A whole lot.”

“Let’s get to work then.”

He went through the recipe and one or two tricks that could help me when brewing the thing myself. At the end we had produced four more of the jars. Three of them Slughorn put on his shelves, one he gave to me.

“I’d guess you won’t need it anytime soon. But it keeps nearly forever, so it won’t hurt to keep it for emergencies in whatever field you chose to work. And now that you know how to brew it and should wish to practice again, you can always ask me for the ingredients or supplies. I would have to supervise your use of them. You’ll understand that I don’t want you to take the silver for making jewellery. “

“Completely.” Frankly, I didn’t understand anything that was going on but I ran with it. By this point I was one hundred percent certain that Slughorn had noticed the theft. Otherwise he’d not have said that I could ask him for more of the potion. I thought he’d be mad at me but since he wasn’t I had to conclude that he knew about Remus’ condition and my friendship to him.

When Slughorn dismissed me it was pitchblack outside. I quickly looked up. The moon hadn’t fully risen yet, but it was definitely visible. According to our DADA material the transformation didn’t happen until the moon had done exactly that. Full rise and full moon. I imagined that the boys had already eaten and were on their way to wherever they hid during these nights. They’d gone so far as to tell us that there was a hideout but not where it was.

My steps quickened as I crossed the lawn. Suddenly, the lights from the castle’s windows seemed very far away. How fast did the moon rise? How far away from the castle was the hideout? Did the boys get there in time for the transformation? I quickened my steps. I started jogging. I did not want to run into Remus tonight. Absolutely not. Nope.

“Goods!” I stopped. Turned around.

“Sirius?”

“What are you still doing out here? Moon’s nearly risen.”

“Why d’you think I’m running?” I couldn’t spot any of the other boys.

“Oh… are you scared of the big bad wolf?” Sirius smug smirk appeared on his lips.

“I thought I already told you that I’d rather not run into a transformed werewolf. So, yeah. I love Remus, I do, but …”

“You don’t want to share his fate.”

“Well, no I don’t. And I’d rather not die, either.”

“Fair enough. No need to be scared, he’s already where he’s supposed to be.”

“Why aren’t you?”

“Forgot you wonder potion in the dorm… We have a fairly established routine for nights like these. And your stupid jar, is not yet part of it. But Remus insisted I get it.” I swung my backpack from my back to my chest and opened it.

“What are you doing?” I handed him the new jar of dittany and silver.

“Slughorn was at detention. He must have noticed that I stole one of the jars and taught me how to brew it. I got to keep one. Fully legal this time.”

“What kind of detention is that? I only ever get to clean things or write the same sentence over and over again.”

“Haven’t quite worked that out yet. But it seems to have some kind of deeper meaning. Slughorn said that he’d stop by more often during detention to teach me potions. The useful kind that I might enjoy brewing. He said it’s to help me get into the auror programme but I don’t know whether I should believe that.”

“Curious” Sirius looked up at the dark sky. “I gotta run.”

“Right… Hug Remus for me, yeah?” Sirius tilted his head. He didn’t look impressed with that suggestion.

“Or tell him I’m hugging him mentally.”

“Will do.” He was ready to head back to where he had come from.

“And be careful, you hear?”

“You worried about me?”, again he smirked at me.

“Yes, Sirius, I am. About all of you. Including Remus.  So, be careful and not arrogant or heroic or Merlin knows what. Okay?”

Sirius came a little closer and studied my face.

“Nothing will happen, Goods. We’ve done this for a while now. We know what we’re doing.”

“Yeah, right because it’s such a common practice to ru…”

“Nothing”, Sirius interrupted me “will happen to any of us. I promise.” He gave me that look that made one feel like he uncovered the deepest and darkest secrets of one’s soul.

“Fine. Fine, fine. Run off, then.” I pushed him against his shoulders to give him some momentum.

“Get something to eat you worried Goodie-two-shoes”, Sirius grinned as he ran back into the blackness of the grounds.

I continued on my way to dinner, slower than before, but distinctly more concerned. He could promise me that they’d be fine a million times, I would never fully believe that none of them took unnecessary risks. That was in their blood. They were inherently adventurous. To the point of stupidity. This was going to be a long night. I doubted I’d get any sleep at all.

Entering the Great Hall and spotting Milla, Blair, Chloe and Nica I realised that none of us would sleep. We’d all be awake all night assuring one another that the boys would be fine. Although none of us were sure about that.

[emma-nation]

Thinking Of You (Mona x MC Fanfiction) - Chapter 8

You said move on Where do I go? I guess second best Is all I will know

Summary: Years later, Allison has everything she wants, a brand-new internship as a doctor, a handsome boyfriend… but her first nightshift won’t go as expected…

Genre: Romance, Angst

Tag list: @zoe6111, @simsvetements, @mvrinettes, @whoinvitedalx, @scarlet-letter-a0114, @abunchofbadchoices, @kamilahmademedoit, @janurary, @talkinlikeateen, @eagle-one-1, @andreear17, @tia-bi, @monagf, @monahott, @fal-carrington, @crazzyplays, @honorablebicycle​, @teja-desai​ (let me know if you want to be tagged!)

Notes:

- English is not my first language, forgive me for any mistakes.

“Party, Allison?” Mr. Wheeler questioned. “This is how you intend to catch a serial killer? By taking her to a party?”

“Dad, first we need to get the seller,” she explained. “And what place is better than a party to catch a drug dealer?”

“I did not assigned you to the mission so you could hang out with her. You have a fiancé, don’t you remember? And besides, there will be alcohol, sex and...”

“We’re no longer teenagers, dad. We know what we’re doing, right Mona?”

Mona was not even paying attention. She was sitting on the couch, focused on Allison’s laptop. She wasn’t hearing a single word of the argument, she just kept a concentrated look on the screen, while she typed uninterrupted.

“What?” She finally asked. “In case the two of you haven’t noticed, I have an essay to finish.”

“You don’t have to worry about it,” Mr. Wheeler told. “Bring me more suspects, more evidence. This is what you’re supposed to be doing in college. Once the mission is over, you’re out.”

“Right, I forgot that wasn’t for people like me,” she scowled, closing the laptop. “Thanks for the reminder, Pops.”

Mona left to the bedroom, leaving Allison alone with her father.

“Dad, she has been so engaged with this college thing. Why did you have to ruin it?”

“I didn’t ruin anything, Allison. That’s the truth. They’re only allowing Mona there for the mission.”

“B-But can’t we arrange anything, after this is over? I mean, look at her essay. She’s so incredibly smart. All the teachers are commenting her performance in classes. It’s the first time I really see her finding pleasure in anything, other than... her past habits.”

“I’m sorry, honey. This isn’t my business and neither should be yours. She has made her own choices and there’s nothing we can’t do to change it.”

Allison went to check on Mona, but after the argument with Mr. Wheeler, she was no longer social or even accessible. She followed to the guest room, where she was supposed to have one final conversation with Griffin about their engagement. Though he was online, he took a long time to pick up the call.

“Allison, baby. Hey.”

“Hey Griffin,” she sighed. “Do you finally have a moment so we can speak? It has been days I’ve been trying to...”

“I’m sorry, I’m very busy right now. Yellow Fever epidemics. Too many patients to check.”

Another excuse. Allison rolled her eyes. It was almost like he knew what she was about to tell him.

“It’s only for a few minutes,” she insisted, losing her patience. “Come on, you had time to fly to Spain over the weekend, but you don’t have a minute for me?”

Griffin’s expression suddenly darkened.

“S-Spain? I’ve never been in Spain, Allison. I’m trapped here in this small village, without internet signal most of the time. Trust me, we barely have water to drink!”

“Well, your phone was displaying a different location a few days ago.”

“Oh...” he looked down for a moment, pensive. “I had to sell my old phone. That’s it, the new owner must have forgotten to disable my ID. Thanks for telling me.”

“No problem, now can we...”

A message of lost signal was displayed on her screen. Allison punched the keyboard, frustrated.

“You gotta be kidding me.”

----------

When Mona woke up in the morning, she was still in a bad mood because of the Detective, who was only using her to do the job he was unable to. Things only got worse when she had an accidental meeting with Allison. In the bathroom. When she had just finished. What lead them to be awkward around each other for the next hour.

"My bad," she was getting used to pronounce those words.

"There'd be no problem, Mona," Allison's cheeks went red again, "if you hadn't stared for so long."

"I was only appreciating the view. I hadn't seen it in a while, so..."

"No! Please, can we just forget it?"

"It'll be kinda hard, but I promise I'll try my best."

"Mona!" Allison's face was reaching a new shade of red.

"Consider it unseen," she spoke as Detective Wheeler arrived in the kitchen. "But I liked it," she whispered.

Allison's father interrupted them with another command. The University's basketball team would be hosting a 'Welcome Game', though Mona didn't have the smallest interest in attending, now she'd be forced to.

"Keep an eye on your suspect," he ordered, "and on this guy."

He showed the picture of a slender young male.

"He's the star of the team. Has been reported to be exhibiting abnormal behavior over the last few weeks. Watch who he speaks to, before and after the game."

She didn't have much work, as soon as they arrived in the University, the famous basketball star was casually chatting with Brian, who went back to his dorm carrying a small package.

"It'll be easier than I thought," Mona thought, snapping some pictures.

Later in class, she finished her lab experiment before any other students, so she took the time to search for places to take Allison after the game, as an apology for the morning incident.

"How do you even do that?" Her lab partner whined by her side.

His name was Leon, the leader of the RPG club, and only member too. He bonded with Mona for being rejected by the rest of their classmates as well. Later, they found out they had more in common than they could’ve imagined. He was in love with a med student, who was already committed to another guy.

"Using my brain?"

"I'm using mine, but it just... don't react!"

"Like this," Mona did all the procedure again, triggering the correct chemical reaction.

"B-But..." Leon stared at her in shock. “I followed all the instructions!”

"Now write your report, I'm not doing this for you either."

As they finished writing, they began to chat. She learned Leon had good computer skills, what could be useful at some point, in case they needed to hack Brian's phone to obtain proof.

"And how are things going with Allison?" He wanted to know.

"The same," she told, hopeless. "She hasn’t broke up with the douchebag yet. I guess I’ll just have to force him out of my way.”

"Are you bringing her to the game tonight?"

"Yes, I was kinda planning something special for after the game, but I don't really know what she likes."

"Bowling Alley," he suggested. "They have this fabulous milkshake and I've managed to achieve success with a couple of dates in there."

"Thanks for the tip."

---------

"So let's recap the plan," Allison said before they entered the stadium. "I'll seduce Brian, while you break into his dorm room and get pictures of the drugs."

"He's a bastard, Allison," Mona disagreed. "I couldn't let you do this alone. You're coming with me, I've assigned someone else to keep an eye on him. While he's distracted at the game, both of us will break into his dorm."

"D-Did you told someone else about the investigation? My dad said we should be as secretive as possible."

"We could use a hacker. Besides, Leon is like a fluffy unicorn. Loyal as a puppy."

Before they follow to the basketball game, Mona inhaled deeply, getting courage enough to ask.

"Hey Allison, would you like to do something after the game? Leon suggested we should go to the Bowling Alley, but he has been developing this stupid game, and... I don’t wanna go by myself."

She knew things didn't end well the last time they went out, but this time was different. Allison had clearly expressed she was no longer interested in keeping her engagement.

"No. Way." Allison frowned, scaring her a little. Then, her expression softened again. "You're not allowed to make such an effort yet, remember?"

"Oh, the doc's back," Mona smiled. "Anyways, he said they have a great milkshake. We don't really have to play it."

"So I'm definitely in!"

Leon was sitting in a strategic spot as combined between he and Mona. For her surprise, and displeasure, there was somebody else among the crowd, sitting in the VIP area, her father.

"What on earth is this guy doing here?" She angered. "He's clearly stalking me!"

Soon she got her answer. Before the game started, he was announced as the team's new sponsor. He looked at her and winked.

"I wish I could just go down there and pull this smirk out of his face!"

"Hey," Allison held her steady. "Focus! You said he's no threat. Let's stick to our plan."

Through his laptop, Leon sent her a message. Brian had arrived and was sitting only a few meters away, in the middle of a group of girls.

"We're good to go."

Leaving the stadium, they followed straight to the male dorm. The game was only getting started, what meant they'd have a decent amount of time to search for evidence.

"Do you have his room's number?" Allison asked.

"Yes," Mona answered. "It's right around the corner."

At the corridor, they bumped into another person. Krista. She was just leaving one of the rooms.

"Remember, Doug. Ezekiel 18:21 for our studies this week. See you there!"

"Hide me, please," Mona begged, but it was too late. She had been spotted.

"Mona, hi!" The girl greeted. "What are you doing here? I thought you'd be at the game."

"I... uh... Leon, my classmate. He forgot his wallet in his dorm room. I came here to get it for him."

"And this is...?" She looked at Allison.

"Allison," Allison introduced herself. "You look strangely familiar, have we met before?"

"Hmmm, I don't think so."

"Yeah, I'm much older than you anyways."

"Hey Krista," Mona decided to mess up with her a little bit, as a payback for the other day. "I've decided to get rid of my sinful car. I'd like to purchase one exactly like yours, how much did you pay for it?"

"Good for you, Mona," she looked a little bit unsettled. "I don't know how much it costed, it was a gift from my godfather. Anyways, I should go now. I have an essay to finish."

With a satisfied look, Mona followed to Brian's room where she started picking the lock.

"Remember, your dad said I could do anything to obtain proof. Right?"

"Yes," Allison confirmed. "I'm your witness."

As the door opened, they both covered their noses.

"Ugh, it smells like rotten cheese," Allison commented.

The room was an extreme mess, it was hard to decide where to start looking for evidence. Mona started by Brian's computer, where Allison opened opened some drawers.

"No way I'm touching that pile of clothes in the corner of the room," she told. "It stinks like something died under it."

"It can't be more disgusting than that," Mona pointed to the computer screen. "He's ranking the freshmen girls and... I've got a 10, for the tough girl attitude?"

"Not even Brian could resist you, huh?"

"No one can, babe. No one."

There was nothing on his e-mail, except for Football Newsletter and party advertising. Mona sighed frustrated.

"If you were hiding your drugs, where would you hide them?"

"Under the mattress?"

"Good one," Mona lifted up the mattress a little bit, to find... romance books. "Really?"

"Come on, he deep down he must be a softie! So, in the closet maybe?" Allison suggested, but before they could even act, the door opened. Brian was back earlier than expected.

“What are you two doing in my room?!” He shouted. “I’m calling campus security, right now!”

----------

“Will you, bad boy?” Mona teased, in a intimidating manner. “Because I’m sure the last thing you want are the cops here, in your room. Am I right?”

“Oh, do you think a little thief like you? I’d like to see you prove, before I get your ass expelled from the university.”

Allison stood frozen, looking at them both. Mona had that look on her face, from when she was ready to get in a physical fight with someone. That would jeopardize the entire investigation, besides getting them both kicked out from university. Without thinking any longer, she made a decision. This is exactly what a brainless moron like Brian would like to see.

“Actually,” she removed her shirt off, revealing a lacy violet bra. “We were preparing you a surprise.”

“Excuse me?!” Brian asked, staring at her features.

“Mona told me about you and how irresistibly hot you are...” she pushed him onto the bed, climbing on top of him. “I’m sorry she isn’t good showing her feelings. I decided to give her a little hand.”

“P-Please, go ahead...”

Brian was smiling broadly. Allison winked to Mona, who was in extreme shock, inviting her to go along with her plan.

“What would you like us to do now, huh?” Allison asked him, in a seductive tone. “Anything you want.”

“M-Make out. The two of you. Please!”

Allison looked at Mona, to see if she consented. She was too dazed make a move or gave her any answer. Instead, she took a step ahead, cupping Allison’s face between her hands carefully, before placing a small kiss on her lips. Allison knew that wouldn’t be enough. Not for Brian, and especially for herself.

She pulled Mona by the waist, bringing her closer as possible and deepening the kiss. For a long time, she hadn’t felt so much pleasure in her life. The softness of Mona’s lips devouring hers, their tongues moving together, it all brought her that burning sensation she had been desiring for years. She wished that moment would never end, prolonging the kiss as much as she could, until they were both out of breath.

“Now, take off your clothes!” Brian ordered, bouncing in excitement.

“Let’s finish this...” Mona grabbed a pair of handcuffs from her pockets and restrained him on the bed post.

“Hell yeah, baby! It’s gonna get kinky here!”

“Where did you get those?” Allison asked curious.

“I stole from your father. I thought they could be useful at some point. Now go, finish searching his desk. I’ll check to the closet.”

“Wait...” Brian was confused. “What’s going on here? Are you guys cops?”

“Sort of,” Allison answered, irritated, “and if you open your mouth again, I’m going to gag you!”

Mona emerged from the closet, with the package she had previously seen Brian carrying in the morning.

“The party is over, bad boy.”

“No, please,” he begged as she unwrapped it. “D-Don’t tell anyone, I-I... I’ll pay you! My dad has a lot of money.”

“Oh shit,” Mona exclaimed, staring at the content. Allison approached, noticing some familiar blue pills.

“Really, Brian?” Allison tried to muffle a laugh. “We thought you were a drug dealer and you...”

“Can’t get it to work properly?” Mona completed, bursting into laughs.

“I have a medical condition, okay?! And if you ever tell this anyone, I’m going to kill you both!”

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with us.”

“As long as our secret is safe too. And stop harassing girls, I mean it.”

After uncuffing him, the three of them sat down to talk about their task and what had been going on. Brian assured he wasn’t involved in any kids of drug dealing and would warn them in case he noticed anything suspicious, as long as his big secret was safe.

“I felt bad for him in the end,” Allison said as they left the room.

“Yeah, me too. All this jerk act he plays is because he...” Mona started laughing again, “has issues down there.”

Suddenly loud screaming and a big commotion started coming from all places in the University. Mona and Allison’s phones started ringing at the same time. The basketball player had fallen unconscious in the middle of the game. He had been hospitalized in a life-threatening condition.

“Stay where you are,” Mr. Wheeler ordered through the phone. “We need to check his dorm for evidence.”

----------

The police wasn’t able to find anything at the young athlete’s dorm, every evidence had been professionally cleaned. Their only hope were the surveillance cameras footage, that could’ve been caught who last entered his room.

Mr. Wheeler asked them both to go home. There was nothing else for them to do in there. Mona remained silent inside her car, blaming herself for aiming at the wrong suspect. Allison insisted and they stopped at the Bowling Alley as planned.

“It wasn’t your fault,” she told Mona, as they shared a milkshake. “It happens all the time with my dad and he has been a high-skilled detective, for years.”

“I should’ve known better,” Mona shook her head in denial. “We’re dealing with an expert, Allison. A psychopath. They don’t usually show this dark side of them. We need to start aiming for someone more... normal.”

“Any suspects?”

“None yet, but I’ll be thinking about it.”

Allison let out a deep and weary sigh.

“Jeez, I never thought this could be so intense and emotional. Even if we were just faking all the time.”

There was something else that wouldn’t leave Mona’s mind. That kiss. Was it only part of the role or Allison had true intentions when she decided to go deeper into it?

“Were we faking all the time?” Mona asked.

Allison looked down, avoiding her gaze for a moment.

“Not at all,” she finally answered, biting her lower lip.

Mona approached her, lifting up her chin.

“Would you mind doing it again? Only to be sure it was real?”

Mona leaned forward, her lips only one breath away from Allison’s. She hesitated for a moment, then placed a hand on Mona’s chest and slightly pushed her away.

“Would you mind waiting only a little longer? I still need to break off my engagement. I feel bad for doing this to Griffin. While I no longer have feelings for him, we had an entire history together.”

“I’ve waited eight years,” Mona grinned. “What’s only a few more days, right?”

“Yeah,” Allison grabbed her hand, “until the weekend I’ll be free. I promise you.”

As soon as they got home, Detective Wheeler was already waiting for them with a scowl on his face. He advanced in Mona’s direction, pinning her against the wall.

“You! You’ve ruined my investigation!” He yelled. “I’ll assure you’ll get severely punished for that!”

“Dad!” Allison shouted, pushing him aside. “What are you saying? We followed the wrong lead, and so did you, multiple times!”

“Allison, she included a total stranger in the investigation. This kid named Leon. The security cameras’ footage is gone. Considering his computer skills, he’s our main suspect now.”

“L-Leon would never do that,” Mona argued, Allison could tell she was somehow scared. “I-I was in contact with him the whole time... he was sitting at the stadium, watching the game for us!”

“While he hacked into the security system and erased everything! Now, because of your irresponsibility, we’ll need to contact the company in charge of campus’ security and attempt to retrieve footage from their server. It’s going to take weeks! Do you have any idea of how many people will die until then?”

Mona stared at the open tab on the Detective’s laptop, the security company’s website and then she realized...

“Leon didn’t do it. This security system is 99,9% impossible to be hacked. And don’t worry. Until the weekend you’re getting your footage, Detective.”

“And how can you be so sure?”

“My mom developed this security system and trust me, you don’t wanna mess with her tech skills.”

[trivialqueen]

Here’s the next section of that original story.

As always, I’m neither a doctor, nor British.  I’m just a girl who fancies herself a writer and likes slow burns, smart women, and tall men.

Run

Wandering the hospital was one of her favorite pass times when she worked overnights. The energy was so different. The usually busy wards peaceful and quiet, most of the staff gone for the day. It was an eerie, liminal energy, like at any moment she might turn a corner and cross into a different dimension. It was part of what made her sign up for more than her required nightshifts. Eerie it might be, but she loved the vibe of overnights. Plus, it was a good time for her to catch up on paperwork. No electives, no emails, no distractions. Walking the silent wards provided welcome breaks from the mountains of paperwork on her desk. Swaths of productive time were great, but it also made her back ache.

There was a light on in Irene’s breakroom. It cast a long beam from under the door. When she’d checked the weekend schedule, she’d noted that Doug was the register on that night, but she’d not bothered checking who was the GS specialist working alongside them. Quietly she opened the door.

“Helvetes jävla fanskap!” Sofia Grace didn’t know what to process first: The fact she was stuck on nightshift with Björn the Slasher; the fact she’d managed to startle him so badly he both jumped and swore; or the fact that he was by his own standards practically naked. Magnusson was standing at the sink, his jacket and tie draped over a chair, dress shirt in his hands as he attempted to spot clean what appeared to be pen from the fabric. His belt was undone, slacks unbuttoned, and a tee style undershirt was stretched tight across his broad shoulders. Given his usual reserve and the circumstances Sofia Grace felt herself blush on his behalf.

“Ms. Hale, I apologize for, well… all of this.” He was at a loss for words, blushing scarlet and clearly wishing he was dead.

“Usually you’re the one to do the sneaking up, not the other way around.”

“Quite so.” For a moment they could only stare at one another, stain remover pen hanging limply from Magnusson’s long fingers.

“Coffee?” She focused on the single serve coffee machine behind him. It felt too rude to just turn and walk away from him, even if she’d prefer to not have to socialize with the unpleasant Swedish surgeon.

“No, thank you. I never acquired a taste for it.” From the corner of her eye she could see his shoulders relax once she was focused elsewhere. He carefully returned to the stain on his shirt.

“Don’t tell me you’re one of those people that doesn’t do caffeine.” They didn’t have anything in common already, but not even chemical addiction? He scoffed.

“Certainly not. I find a well-made Assam or Darjeeling does an adequate job in perking me up without tasting phenolic.”

“Would it be trite of me to say that you’ve just not been drinking the right coffee?” Not that any of the coffees on offer in Irene’s breakroom were the right sort.

“Very.” He almost sounded amused.

“I might have thought you’d use your position as DOS to get out of working overnight.” Charlotte used to, although she was a single mother with two younger kids.

“Then you clearly don’t know me very well.” She ground her teeth, bracing for a lecture about leadership or personal responsibility. “I love the nightshift.”

“Really?” he was holding up his dress shirt now, inspecting it for any lingering ink.

“Really. The hospital is finally ours again, all the pencil pushers and bean counters have gone home.” She couldn’t help but smile at that.

“Quiet, calm, a little eerie,” She turned to shoot him a smile as he shrugged on his now slightly damp collared shirt. “Plus, a more casual dress code.” He glowered at her, long fingers buttoning his shirt, bottom to top.

“Not on purpose, I assure you.” The machine spluttered the last of the coffee into the paper cup.

“Suit yourself.” She shrugged, “But ditching the tie on occasion won’t kill you.” She preferred to wear more professional clothes during the day. It helped underline her status as a specialist and a surgeon, even if some of the dinosaurs still treated her worse than a nurse. However, last nightshift they’d had office chair races down the fifth-floor corridor. Her flats, skinny jeans, and blazer combo was more than adequate.

“I’ll take it under advisement.” He said while retying his tie. She sipped her coffee rather than let him see her amusement.

“Well, I best get back to my office.” She moved to the door. That was quite enough socializing for the evening. “You’ll be pleased to know I eventually get caught up on my paperwork.”

“I never doubted you.” His smile was almost sincere, it made her pause, turn back over her shoulder to look up at him. He was younger looking in this light, the lines of his face relaxed. Without his glasses on it was easy to see his smart, dark eyes. Strong brows, dignified nose, high cheekbones. He was a handsome man, damnit, even if he was also authoritarian and unpleasant.

“The best place to watch the sunrise is the roof. The north stairs have direct access.” She had no idea why she said that, the roof was her place. Catching sunrise after a nightshift was one of her traditions. She’d pop up and sit with her coffee, legs dangling over the edge, enjoying the soft glow of morning breaking in shades of lavender and gold over the skyline.

“The roof is restricted access.”

“Wenn d’ moisch.”

It was common enough for patients on the ward to need emergency surgery in the middle of the night – which was why registers and consultants are required to do a nightshift, but it was not so common that should emergency surgery but required it didn’t spread through the reduced staff. Which is how Felix learned Ms. Hale and Doug MacLiam had taken one of their CT patients into theatre.

He could faintly hear the scream of guitars before he even entered the scrub room. Black Sabbath if he had a guess, but hard rock was never his strong suit.

“Care for some company?” Much like their first meeting Ms. Hale didn’t look up from what she was doing, even to speak to him.

“Knock yourself out.” Was all she said, before rattling off a list of instructions to both MacLiam and the nightshift surgical nurse, both of whom seemed to hesitate under his gaze.

“Mr. Magnusson.” MacLiam’s brogue was slightly unsteady. Fearful. Contrary to popular belief, Felix did not thrive off the fear of others and rarely intended to terrorize. It just worked out that way. “I had no idea you would be joining us tonight.”

“Should I have RSVP’d?” MacLiam was a competent enough surgeon and doctor by all accounts, but he did have an annoying habit of saying empty sentences.  “Might you have chosen something a little less…screaming” the song had changed, even though he wasn’t an avid rock or metal fan he would still recognize AC/DC anywhere.

“The playlist was my choice.” Hale announced, “Doug’s a little too country, I’m much more rock and roll.”

“and here I thought Handel was more your speed.” He didn’t like operating with music on but playing something operatic could improve all the required paperwork his job brought. The Sonata 5 was a personal favorite.

“I’m just like an onion, Mr. M.”

“you make people cry?” MacLiam teased. Hale did look up at that, giving the Irishman an amused look, her eyes dancing. She never looked at him like that. In fact, thus far she’d not looked at him at all.

“Cheeky!” She laughed. “I’ve got layers.”

She’s like a leather brand too much for any man she gives me the first degree she really satisfies me…

As much as he hated to draw on something like AC/DC they were undeniably correct. Sofia Grace Hale did indeed have rhythm. He could see her carefully work on the monitor, how she deftly wielding her tools. It was easy to forget her maverick streak when watching her hands.

“Sheiße!” Things had been going so smoothly. “Puncture – the artery is damaged and he’s bleeding into the pleura.” Felix felt himself snap out of his passive observer role.  

“Right. We need to repair the artery. I’ll need an oscillating saw.” Cutting through the cavity and opening the chest more folly would provide the necessary, most efficient access. Ms. Hale finally did look at him. Her coffee colored eyes weren’t spitting hellfire at him for once, but they were stony and quite serious.

“If you cut through the collar bone, he’ll need an awful lot of time off work to recover.” The surgical tech handed him the saw wordlessly. Non-invasive procedures and working mostly with the stomach, intestines, and not chest cavity he so rarely got to use power tools in his work.

“We need to repair the artery, do we not?” Magnusson didn’t understand why she was hesitating. The man was bleeding profusely, and she was worrying about recovery time, not the blood in the pleura.

“Yeah, I need some room, but slicing through his collar bone means he’ll never be able to lift another stockpot as long as he lives.” She raised a challenging brow. It was a nice sentiment but unavoidable. He flipped the saw on, it buzzed in perfect time with Chop Suey!

“Oi!” There it was, the indignant spark in her eyes. “Enough with the saw, Dr. Leatherface.” She stared at him, hard, until he turned the saw off. “Thank you. Now, I know you think you know everything but I’m the CT specialist here.” Beside her he could hear MacLiam whisper “Damn”. Hale ignored him; her eyes still locked with his. “I do need some room, but I can get to the artery another way, if you’d just give me two seconds.”

“This better be good.” She spoke with such confidence, such defiance he was now intrigued to see what she felt she could do.

“Hand me my wooden spoon, please.” She nodded toward the tray. It was the first that he noticed the wooden cooking spoon amongst the sleek scalpels, forceps, and needle holders. It looked ridiculous. “My mentor back at Stanford always kept one on hand and I adopted his habit.” Carefully she placed the handle of the spoon as far under the subclavian artery as she could, moving it out of the way. “Could you hold that there, please?” She nodded toward the end of the spoon. He had seen plenty of surgical tricks in his day, even performed a few himself with sterile drawing pins, but this was a first, even for him. The spoon opened up the area a bit more and considering her small hands and how efficient she was with her sutures it was enough room for her.

“Father into your hands, I commend my spirit/ Father into your hands/ why have you forsaken me/ In your eyes forsaken me/ In your thoughts forsaken me/ In your heart forsaken, me oh…” She sang brightly along with the lyrics as she stitched, which made for an odd (and oddly charming) juxtaposition.

“aanndd… cut.” MacLiam snipped the suture. “Lovely!” Despite the mask it was clear she was beaming. “you can take the spoon out now, Mr. M. Gently.” He did as he was told, slowly lowing the subclavian back to its proper position.

“Holy Shit.” MacLiam was staring in open admiration. Felix agreed whole heartedly.

“It’s old school but it works.” She shrugged, calling for the necessities for closing up.

“It’s impressive.” He couldn’t keep the awe from his voice, nor did he try. She was perhaps the single most intriguing surgeon he had ever met. Her head shot up, eyes wide with surprise, from behind her mask he could tell her mouth had fallen open.

“It’s why we call her the Queen of Hearts.” MacLiam declared proudly, continuing to close the patient up when her hands stilled.

Sofia Grace laced her running shoes tightly, another successful surgery without the usual release. So she had to chase it. Quite literally. The hospital gym was a small corner of the basement. It had a handful of cardio machines, free weights, a speedbag, and a janky TV off in a corner. It was rarely full, even during the day. At night it was always dead.

Except for when it wasn’t.

Felix Magnusson was not half as imposing dressed in an ill-fitting tee and nylon shorts. Outside of his tailored suits he didn’t even seem as tall. The shirt was boxy and hung straight from his shoulder disguising his trimmed waist and perfect V proportions. His legs were muscular – he was clearly an avid runner, but even with those muscles his legs looked thin and lanky. His ass was nice though, and not completely concealed beneath the baggy top.

Of course he runs.

Of course he runs now.

She pushed her hair out of her face and jammed her earbuds in. She would focus on her run, her euphoria, and finishing her shift, wide awake and happy.

Headphones in, Led Zeppelin playing, gradient set and pace determined - 6:30/mile. Usually it was enough to get her in the zone.

God he’s got big, dumb feet. From the corner of her eye she could see him trip over them.

As much as he loved the nightshift, staying up was never his strength. Running was the best way he knew to stave off drowsiness and get him to see morning light without resorting to napping in his office. The gym was small and mismatched but serviceable. Since coming to Saint Sebastian’s he’d taken advantage of the facilities at various points and each time it’d been empty when he started, during, and after he finished his run. A veritable ghost town. It’d been lovely.  

It was no more.

He could just see her out of the corner of his eye stretching beside the treadmill furthest from him. Ms. Hale being a runner made complete sense giving the beauty that was her legs. Quite a bit of those gams were on display given the obscenely short spandex shorts she wore. The rest of her outfit was equally as ‘modest’; her shoes and sports bra were the same shade of florescent pink. He knew of the latter because the sleeves of her tee shirt had not just been cut off, but cutout, the hole extending hallway down her body, showing her sports bra and ribs every time her arms moved. Not even Dr. Dre reminding him that “Bitches ain’t shit” could dislodge the images of her legs from behind his eyelids.

The morning air was chilly, especially on bare feet. While she had no fear of heights herself, she did have a paranoia about dropping something over the edge. Like her shoes. She kicked her legs over the edge of the roof. Leaning on the rail she felt herself smile as the first glowing rays of light peaked over the skyline. Another successful shift, another beautiful sunrise.

“Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day-”

“You’ve got a beautiful feeling?” The voice behind her was jarring, and for a dizzying moment she almost regretted her daredevil habit of living – and sitting – on the edge.

“The roof is restricted access.” She parroted back to him. Magnusson was back in his suit and looked at least seven foot seven as she sat on the ground. He smirked at her over the rim of his teacup.

“I see you share my fondness for restricted areas.”

“Rules were never really my strong suit.”

“Clearly.” He approached the rail beside her, mindful of her shoes and beloved Wonder Woman mug. Those big, dumb feet crunched across the sparsely graveled roof came to a stop beside her. The oxfords were shiny, she expected no less. For a long time, they were silent, soaking in the morning’s glory together.

“You’re shivering.” She was too, damnit. If it was darkest just before dawn, it was also coldest. At midday the weather was still lovely, between eleven and fourteen degrees. It was, however, quite chilly otherwise. Barefoot and her blazer was no match for the coming autumn, even with a cup of coffee thickening her blood.

“It’s a bit fresh.”

“I can hear your teeth chattering.” A long hand came into view. “Perhaps it’s time to go in.” She turned and looked up at him, squinting against the new risen sun. He was stooped slightly, like a giraffe trying to drink. He looked ridiculous, if oddly charming, damn him.

She handed him her mug before leveraging herself up with the railing. He barely escaped being hit in the face with her sudden standing. He was still so close, his broad chest radiating a heat she could feel through her own blazer. His dark eyes seamlessly shifted from looking at her to taking in the mug she’d unceremoniously dumped in his hand.

“Here’s to strong women,” He read, vintage Wonder Woman peeking through his long fingers.

“May we know them; May we be them; May we raise them.” She finished. It was her favorite mug, one of her dearest possessions for over ten years. Her godfather had given it to her when she’d left for Tübingen all those years before. It was amazing that it was in as good of condition as it was, though she supposed it helped that she didn’t wash it that often.

“A noble goal.” He made to hand her back the cup as she bent to put her flats back on.

“Jävlar!” Coffee sloshed across the front of his white collared shirt. Thankfully it was now only tepid at best, but it was dark and strong.

“Sheiße!” She dropped her shoe, reflexively reaching like she could fix this problem. “I am so sorry.”

“It’s no problem, Ms. Hale.” Magnusson answered, primly, handing her the mug back. It was then she realized her hand was splayed on his chest. Considering how warm he was under her palm, the analogy of pulling one’s hand back as if was burned was only partial exaggeration.

“It seems we’ve come full circle.” She was blushing scarlet and he had a stain on his shirt.

“Indeed,” Magnusson smoothly buttoned his jacket, covering the spot. “However, my night is over, so I may deal with this at home, not Irene’s breakroom.” They left the roof in awkward silence, which didn’t end until she reached her floor and he wished her a nice Sunday. Back in her office Sofia leaned heavily against her door, running a hand through her hair. Nightshifts always had an eerie, liminal energy, like she just might cross into another dimension.  And maybe last night she had.

[generousartisangladiator]

Sam and Dean as they were. Season 2. Part two

02.12 Nightshifter

This episode don’t reveal a lot of the character dynamics, but nevertheless it gives some of the subtle details. Sam now takes the hunt more seriously, he is more driven, more determined, more mature. He seriously takes his FBI role, it’s a little thing, but very telling. Dean is still playful about it (his advances to the witness are also telling as well as his childish ideas about him and Sam as Bonni and Clyde), but not for Sam. And his professional behaviour with Ronald also underlines it and Dean kidding about that serves only to highlight it more. And he is extremely concerned not to involve anybody in it, because it’s a dirty, risky and hopeless life and he does everything he can to try to keep Ronald from it: at first from the dangerous knowledge, than he tries to look out for him in the bank. Such determination and the change in the behaviour and his accepting the hunt (not as his free choice but still) as his life, are caused by several factors: firstly, he found the satisfaction in saving lives (it sucks, it hurts, but they live because of me), secondly his hope that by saving lives he can change his dark destiny and he firmly believes to fight Yellow Eyed Demon’s plans for himself and he thinks that the more good he will do, the less are chances he will be turned into something evil, thirdly, his feelings towards his father – he wants to do what his father would have wanted from him, he starts to develop the sense of duty and, the last but not least he lost the hope for his personal happiness and thinks it will be impossible for himself. All this was shown in the previous episodes and this episode showed the result of all that. And the result is stunning: a brilliant professional, easily getting evidence under the pretence of the FBI agent, finding the guilty and preventing the murder of the innocent, capable to think fast under pressure – Sam’s plan of withdrawal was spontenuous and absolutely brilliant. And professionally Sam already exceeds his brother: it was him who stops Dean from killing an innocent girl, who Dean mistook for the shapeshifter, and it was him who provides the plan of departure.

Dean is shown as rush in his decisions but still he gives the initiative in the investigations to Sam, as well as his dare may care approach to his own safety.

 02.13 Houses of Holy. An excellent episode revealing the new sides of the brothers’ characters. If Usual Suspects was focused on their similarities, this episode underlines their difference. Their lives were hard, there was a lot of dirt, death and blood in their lives, they saw a lot of tragedy but the same experience led to the opposite approaches to such thing as faith. All that evil that Sam saw in his life made him believe in Good even more. Because it there is evil then there should be Good as well, something which is bigger, greater and wiser. He believes that there is somebody who is listening, somebody who cares, and that means there is  hope.

SAM: I don't know, Dean, I just, uh . . .  (he sits on the bed) I wanted to believe ... so badly, ah ... It's so damn hard to do this, what we do. You're all alone, you know? And ... there's so much evil out there in the world, Dean, I feel like I could drown in it. And when I think about my destiny, when I think about how I could end up... 

DEAN(sitting on the bed beside him):Yeah, well, don't worry about that. All right? I'm watching out for you.

SAM: Yeah, I know you are. But you're just one person, Dean. And I needed to think that there was something else, watching too, you know? Some higher power. Some greater good. And that maybe . . .

(Eric Clapton's "Knockin' on Heaven's Door" slowly enters)

DEAN: Maybe what?

SAM: Maybe I could be saved.

 As for Dean all that evil he has seen in his life made him not believe in the Good in the world.

 DEAN: Okay, all right. You know what? I get it. You've got faith. That's — hey, good for you. I'm sure it makes things easier. 

(he sits again) I'll tell you who else had faith like that — Mom. She used to tell me when she tucked me in that angels were watching over us. In fact, that was the last thing she ever said to me. 

SAM: You never told me that.

DEAN: Well, what's to tell? She was wrong. There was nothing protecting her. There's no higher power, there's no God. I mean, there's just chaos, and violence, and random unpredictable evil th, that comes out of nowhere, and rips you to shreds. You want me to believe in this stuff? I'm going to need to see some hard proof. You got any?

 02.14. Born under the Bad Sign.

In this episode Sam clearly understood that Dean under no circumstances will keep his promise to kill Sam. In any case, it was stupid hope.

Dean. Dean understood that under no circumstances he will kill Sam, it will be easier for him to die himself, even if Sam grows horns and a tail. He is ready to fight for Sam until the end.

 02.14. Tall tales

Sometimes living in the close quarters can be irritating and even the best of us have the annoying habits.

 02.16 Roadkill.

Sam finds forgiveness to those who did something bad because they became the victims of the tragic circumstances:

SAM: Well, they weren't evil people, you know? A lot of them were good. Just... Something happened to them. Something they couldn't control. 

With the time his mercy is shaping and chrystallising more and more, acquiring the more mature form. And Sam is still hopeful and doesn’t reject his Faith in God, because the faith is not about God, it’s about a person who has such faith:

 DEAN:I guess she wasn't so bad... for a ghost. You think she's really going to a better place? 

SAM:I hope so. 

DEAN:I guess we'll never know. Not until we take the plunge ourselves, huh? 

SAM: Doesn't really matter, Dean. Hope's kind of the whole point. 

 02.17 Heart.

Sam fights for every life he can save and insists on trying to save Madison, on trying to find the cure for her, she doesn’t want to kill and that means she is not a killer by nature. At last he gives in the feelings he had been afraid to feel after Jessica’s death, pushing away girls he liked because he feared they might be in danger because of him. Awful is the revelation that Madison is doomed. She was doomed not because of him, but it changes nothing. Is there really any hope for him? In Nightshifter there were hints that Sam doesn’t have much hope for any happiness for himself anymore. But in this episode it was shown much more clearly. He began to lose hope. In season 4 he will start his crusade against the evil without any hope, but the beginning of losing hope has started now. Sam is courageous and he himself shoots Madison, because Sam doesn’t know what the cowardice is (Dean was very wrong when he thought that Sam didn’t kill Amy because he couldn’t. He could, but in fact Dean doesn’t know Sam as well as he thinks and often extrapolates his own characteristics on Sam. More about that later)

Dean. Dean feels for Sam, he doesn’t especially care about Madison, but he is hurt to see how Sam’s hopes are crushed.

02.18 Hollywood Babylon

It’s an easy comic relief after so heavy Heart, but nevertheless it reveals some interesting details about the brothers. Sam tries to distract himself by more and more plunging into hunts. And Dean is happy to be a part of the team, he easily adapts and easily fits into any group (if you throw Dean in the pack of wolves, the pack will get a new member, if you throw Sam into the pack of wolves the pack will get a new leader and new goals). And it has already become habitual that it is Sam who solves the case. Again. He is all in his day’s work. He is not that hopeful and happy boy anymore we met in Pilot.

 02.19 Folsom Prison Blues.

This episode is interesting in two aspects. The first one it shows that Dean easily adapts in any group as I already mentioned. The second one is that the episode shows Dean’s influence on Sam. Not only Sam influences Dean when it was the case when Sam taught Dean to stand up to his father and taught him to take the decisions he himself thinks are right, and that they should be discriminative in their job and let innocent creatures go. But this episode shows how Dean teaches Sam by his example. In this case it’s Dean’s sense of duty. Dean is a man of duty, he was raised in such a way. Sam has been learning this from Dean. “We owe him or her, or them”, I do what I have to do” were more Dean’s phrases than Sam’s, but  this episode shows that Sam  has started to act by the sense of duty too. How Sam’s attitude changed can be seen from these two dialogues:

The first one, in the beginning of the episode

SAM: Well, you barely even know the guy.

DEAN: We know he was in the Corps with Dad. We know he saved Dad's life. We know we owe him.

SAM: But don't you think he's asking a little much?

DEAN: It doesn't matter. We may not be saints, but we're loyal and we pay our debts. Now, that means something to me, and it ought to you. I'm not thrilled about this either, man, but Deacon asked us to hunt this thing down, and that's exactly what we're going to do.

And the second one, at the end:

DEACON: Boys, uh... I can't thank you enough for this. I know it was asking a lot but you still came through. Your daddy ... raised you right.

SAM: Well, we owed you.

DEAN looks at SAM.

 The sense of duty and the sense of responsibility are often mixed, but they are different. The duty is connected with service to people, or to family or to anything else and the responsibility is connected with freedom. That’s why I have always asserted that Dean has always been dutiful and Sam has always been responsible. Dean is obedient Daddy’s soldier, but he has always experiencing troubles with taking the responsibility upon himself. Sam has always taken the responsibility upon himself: he never was afraid to take decisions and readily took the responsibility for the consequences of those decisions. But the sense of duty is becoming to develop in him too.

 02.20. What Is and What Should Never Be

It is fully Dean-centric episode, the first one, later it will be one or two a season every season. From this moment onwards Dean’s PoV in the narrative will be prevailing.

The episode is devoted to Dean and reveals his inner conflict between his inner desire for a peaceful life and his sense of duty:

 DEAN All of them. Everyone that you saved, everyone Sammy and I saved. They're all dead. And there's this woman, that's haunting me. I don't know why. I don't know what the connection is, not yet anyway. It's like my old life is, is coming after me or something. Like it like it doesn't want me to be happy. Course I know what you'd say. Well, not the you that played softball but... "So go hunt the Djinn. He put you here, it can put you back. Your happiness for all those people's lives, no contest. Right?" But why? Why is it my job to save these people? Why do I have to be some kind of hero? (begins to cry while talking) What about us, huh? What, Mom's not supposed to live her life, Sammy's not supposed to get married? Why do we have to sacrifice everything, Dad? (pause) It's... (Dean's lips tremble. Silence. We hear the sky rumbling. Tears begins to falls on DEAN's cheek.) Yeah...

DEAN wipes the tears on his cheeks. He turns around and walks away as the camera goes higher and we see him further and further up from the sky.

 Dean chooses the duty (On a lighter note: Dean likes to ascribe to himself Sam’s achievements and Sam’s victories. It was Sam who saved that plane, not Dean:

REPORTER (cont'd) Indianapolis residents held a candlelight vigil in memory of the hundred and eight people who lost their lives...

DEAN No, no. I stopped that crash.)

 02.21. All Hell Breaks Loose: Part One

This is Sam-centric episode and reveals Sam’s character. Sam was right when he assumed that Yellow Eyed Demon is modeling the conditions to break special children, to make them take a choice to go Dark. The winner in this beauty pageant could be only that who is not only highly trained and can kill, that is not enough, the winner needs to make a choice between “to kill or not to kill” in favour of “to kill” for the sake of his own survival. And this choice was essential for the Yellow Eyed Demon because he needed the agreement of the special child both for opening the Hell Gates, but mostly to say Big Yes to Lucifer. And Yellow Eyed Demon puts the special children under those conditions, those who don’t kill are killed. “I will not kill”, somebody’s desperate vow on the blackboard as a death note.

And what this episode reveals about Sam? Sam is an inborn leader. Leadership comes to him as naturally as breathing, he doesn’t even notice how easily he organizes people so different and panic-stricken, calm them down and care about their survival. It is noticed by Jake as a military man he knows the leader when he sees him:

 JAKE: By the way, I appreciate what you’re doing here.

SAM: What am I doing?

JAKE: Keeping calm. Keeping them calm. Especially considering how freaked to hell you really are. I’ve been in some deep crap before myself. I know the look.

 And Sam refuses to play by Yellow Eyed Demon rules and try to save the lives of everybody in the group. And Yellow Eyed Demon can’t break Sam and when he defeats Jake he refuses to kill him and shows him mercy and spares his life, though he understands that Jake is not worth it. But Sam is not a killer. And it costs him his life.

One more important detail about Sam. Sam learns that demon blood runs in his veins and it shakes him to the core. It’s not just a destiny which can be resisted and can be fought, it’s something you can’t get free of. He loses his hope and starts to think that he is cursed and his soul can’t be saved, but nevertheless he decides to fight against the evil to his last breath and fulfill his duty.

Dean is a protective older brother here, who does everything he can to find Sam.

 02.22. All Hell Breaks Loose: Part Two

Dean. Dean is completely broken. Sam died and that means Deans doesn’t care about anything else

 BOBBY Something big is going down – end-of-the world big.

DEAN (yelling):Well, then let it end!

BOBBY You don't mean that.

DEAN (gets up and stands in BOBBY's face) You don't think so? Huh? You don't think I've given enough? You don't think I've paid enough? I'm done with it. All of it. And if you know what's good for you, you'd turn around, and get the hell out of here.

 Sam died and pain is so blinding that he can’t stand it anymore and goes to the Crossroads. In this Dean’s decision several things mixed: his love to his brother, his pain that he lost him, the terrifying understanding that the whole family died and he left alone (and this frightens him, may be for the first time in his life he understood how it’s awful for him and further this fear will control him more and more) and the feeling that he failed his duty (it was my job and I failed it), his feeling of guilt to Sam (I promised I will save him) and to his father (he died because of me).

I understand. I sympathize. But all that burden from this moment was put on Sam. Dean felt guilt that he had failed in his lifelong responsibility of looking out for Sam, AND he felt guilt that because of him, John was dead. And he puts Sam in EXACTLY the same horrible position that John  had placed him in. Remember his words in Crossroad Blues?

EVAN She had cancer, they'd stopped treatment, they were moving her into hospice, they kept saying... a matter of days. So yeah, I made the deal. And I'd do it again. I'd have died for her on the spot. 

DEAN Did you ever think about her in all this?

EVAN I did this for her.

DEAN (advancing on him) You sure about that? I think you did it for yourself. So you wouldn't have to live without her. But guess what? She's going to have to live without you now. But what if she knew how much it cost? What if she knew it cost your soul? How do you think she'd feel?

These words Dean should have addressed to himself…

 Dean manages to revenge the Yellow Eyed Demon, but before his death he seeds serious doubts in Dean’s soul:

 YED Well, it's a better shake than your dad ever got. And you never wondered why? I'm surprised at you. I mean... (YED approaches DEAN to speak to him face-to-face) you saw what your brother just did to Jake, right? That was pretty cold, wasn't it?

(Chuckles) How certain are you that what you brought back, is 100%, pure, Sam?

 From this points Dean’s doubts in Sam will greatly increase, he will doubt his every step, every his action and again and again will try to find any signs that Sam is not his Sam which in its turn will lead to Sam having stopped being honest with Dean and will start to lie to him.

Sam. Sam turns out to be in a very bad place. At first he he devastated by the thought that he has demon blood in him and he begins to consider himself half a demon, if he had any hope left before this episode he losses it and he begins to think that he is cursed from 6 months:

 BOBBY This thing's so powerful, you'd practically need an A-bomb to destroy it. No way a full-blood demon gets across.

SAM No. (Pause) But I know who could.

 Sam means Jake (who is not full-blood demon just half a demon like me. This can be easily read in Sam’s bitter words and look)

Later from Bobby’s reaction at his appearance and Jake’s words at the cemetery Sam understands that he died and Dean sold his soul for him. Sam’s anger flares up, and he kills Jake without mercy

Sam comes to the conclusion that his mercy which he has shown to Jake not only led to his own death, but to Dean’s being condemned to Hell. This conclusion was the wrong one, he started to blame himself for Dean’s decision, but it’s in character for Sam, he is the responsible one and feels responsibility for people surrounding him. And this tendency will go on. He will take upon himself the actions of other people, mainly Dean and Dean will be happy to shift responsibility on Sam not to feel guilt himself.  Sam also comes to the conclusion that he needs to change, he should learn to be tougher, and learn to overcome his merciful nature. And he kills Jake without hesitation, stomping on his mercy. It’s intention to become tougher, to stomp his mercy, become more pragmatic, to learn to kill without hesitation, to become more like Dean (luckily he didn’t achieve that) will control his actions in season 3.

[emilywatchescursedshow]

Recap of eps watched while grading a midterm

Wow I watched a lot more of the season than I thought I did.

S2 E12 - Nightshifter

Dean and Sam pursue a shapeshifter who has taken to robbing banks, but there plan goes awry when the man Sam earlier dismissed as being crazy decides to take the bank hostage himself. It’s a pretty interesting choice to imply that Sam being so dismissive of the tin-hatter that it drives him to such desperation, and paired with Dean obviously feeling sorry for him and trying to walk back Sam’s dismissal later on (too late) we get more to the theme of Sam being stuck up and Dean having more compassion.

This episode rips off a lot of dialogue from Jose Chung’s: From Outer Space, including the term “mandroid” which is used to describe Mulder to hilarious effect. The tin-hatter seems to parallel a character from that episode as well. Jose Chung is a great episode, and also Dean is very hot in this episode, so I’ll allow it.

S2 E13 - Houses of the Holy

People get visions from a dead priest, who they believe to be an angel, to kill parishioners the priest knows are evil. We learn that Dean doesn’t believe in angels and that Sam prays every day, which, like, why. I’m very much on Dean’s side about that, but I also think from a writing standpoint it might be in the show’s interests to have one of the brothers be a good and devout Christian, I guess.

Sam gets a vision, we have another scene of a lady getting assaulted in a car, and Dean saves her while also maybe starting to believe in the will of god. I’ve said before that Castiel was but a glimmer in the writers’ eyes, but this is the first episode where we toy with the concept of angels, which is pretty interesting.

S2 E14 - Born Under a Bad Sign

Sam gets possessed by a demon and starts killing hunters. He attacks Jo, which I don’t love. We learn that Jo is in love with Dean but that (as I sort of suspected) Dean sees her as being too young for him, which, like, yeah, she is a bit young for Dean “I’m not into prude chicks” Winchester. Also apparently demon Sam smokes and drinks which is fun, I hope we get more of Jarp acting drunk on-screen.

Anyway Bobby saves the day by burning off the demon’s locking scar or something, the demon gets ousted, the viewer learns that John maybe killed Jo’s father on purpose. Which is a pretty weak reveal in my opinion, but I guess it’s supposed to deepen the rift between the Winchesters and the Harvelles? I don’t know.

Hot bitch killer Sam was fun, I would like more lore about how he got possessed in the first place, but otherwise I thought the episode was fine. Oh, we also got the character thru-line that Dean doesn’t want to lose his family members in that he keeps refusing to kill Sam.

S2 E15 - Tall Tales

This episode is a ripoff of the X-Files episode Bad Blood. It’s shot the same way, with two people exchanging their version of events and jokes made at each others expense. I thought the episode itself was really fun, although it works better when your characters have strong personalities/traits that can be exaggerated, and Sam sort of has none while Dean’s personality trait they’ve been focusing on this season is primarily “scumbag.” The twist at the end that the trickster was alive was pretty lame, in my opinion, but eh, that’s sort of how these stories go sometimes.

S2 E16 - Roadkill

There are ghosts, they haunt a road. The main reveal in this episode is that Dean and Sam don’t know what happens when ghosts move on. I wasn’t paying good enough attention to this episode to get a feeling for whether it was creepy, but I really liked the main supporting actress.

S2 E17 - Heart

Sam gets laid for the first time this season and then has to kill his love interest when it’s clear she’s just a werewolf from now on. I guess having any characters be regulars besides the brothers is sort of not in the cards (I know this is drama in the show the whole time), but it was a little strange to watch the “sexing a werewolf” thing get treated so differently in this show from Buffy. Oz gets locked in a cage and learns to control it eventually, whats-her-name gets put down like a rabid dog. Anyway Sam’s sad about it, which is fair. I guess they allotted one sex scene per season or something and Dean got it last season so now it’s Sam’s turn. I was pretty bored by the episode, watching the wolf-girl be a NLOG to Sam’s attempt to turn awkward into charm was .. uh.. I wasn’t into it.

S2 E18 - Hollywood Babylon

Dean gets a job working in Hollywood. He’s good at it and they serve good food.

This episode was weird because I couldn’t figure out what exactly the writers were trying to say. The villain is a writer who gets upset that the execs weren’t taking his script seriously enough and changed it for “cleavage and fart jokes.” Are we supposed to sympathize with the villain? I don’t think so - I think the audience is meant to deride him. But what does that say about how the writers view their own work? Dean’s obsession with actors who play bit characters and deep respect for an actress who stars in campy horror movies is supposed to be “nerdy,” but at least it’s genuine and it’s a main reason this episode was fun to watch.

The Dean/Sam dynamic is interesting in this episode as well. Dean is trying to take care of Sam and after his second dead girlfriend and his demonic possession, but gets caught up in life as a PA while Sam tries to solve the case. Sam looks down on Dean for his nerdiness and generally seems fed up with the whole scene. At least Dean has fun.

S2 E19 - Folsom Prison Blues

Dean and Sam get arrested on purpose so they can work a case of a spirit killing prisoners. It turns out the spirit was an angel of death - a nurse who kills people. We get Sam asking Dean if he’s worried about how well he fits in to the prison culture/lifestyle and Dean saying “No, not really.” Sam apparently did not want to do this case, which is interesting; although the writers probably thought that was a reasonable attitude (not wanting to be in prison) and that having Sam act this way would add tension, it does encourage the viewer to wonder if Sam things prisoners are not as worth protecting. Dean obviously things they are and says as much in the episode. Combined with the way Sam obviously looks down on Dean at times for not knowing things... we get a character who fits with the “elite academia” stereotype for Sam.

I thought the episode was fine, there was some good Jacting in it, and it was fun to see an episode pretty much driven by Dean again.

S2 E20 - What Is and What Should Never Be

Dean has an evil “It’s a Wonderful Life” moment when a Djinn makes him live in a fantasy world where is mom didn’t die. I’m assuming that the lore is the fantasy is what would have actually happened had Mary not died, as I’m not sure Dean would fantasize himself being such an asshole. Anyway, it was fun to watch Dean get really excited about sandwiches and mowing the lawn.

I think it’s interesting that this season has seen such a theme for Dean of wanting things to be different, and specifically, being tired of hunting. The “It’s a Wonderful Life” message gets hammered home at the end when Sam tells Dean that it’s worth the sacrifice so that other people might live, after Dean admits to almost allowing himself to get trapped by the Djinn. We’ve switched places from the beginning of season 1 completely, with Dean being reluctant and Sam being gung-ho. I did feel as though the episode had an interesting relationship with the “I’m a simple man with simple pleasures” way they’ve been writing Dean this whole season. He’s been pretty rash and willing to let his whims distract himself and Sam from cases, so it’s pretty believable that he would almost let himself get trapped by the Djinn.

All in all, I liked the episode.

[black-luz]

10/13 - images of a torn apart swordfish with black blood, gasping for breath. 5 white blobs trapped in transparent boxes in a cyber black background. a pull-back view of my mental state as a graph, how it took a gradual downturn, and then a plummet, and imagining me from 5 years ago looking at the graph, staring at this time in horror, panicking over what it might be. Thinking back to every point that I could’ve told my mom to go to the doctor a little sooner. Would things have been better? Would it be worse?

10/14 - feel like i’m living in a nightmare wrapped in the facade of calm, / calm before the storm. I’m so afraid of what comes next

I can’t believe it was only 6 days ago that i was hellbent on finally submitting my comic in a few weeks. working to improve my art, writing, storytelling, paneling, finalizing the buffer etc in every spare moment i had. it feels like a completely different lifetime

It’s like i had been holding a huge stack of precariously stacked supplies and documents and goals in my arms and then just let them all drop to the floor. and i look down and don’t recognize any of those things.

I keep waking up and it’s not the relief of “it was just a dream” anymore, it’s the horror of realizing real life is worse. It’s being distracted for a few minutes, seconds, maybe even as much as an hour, before the realization that this is not a dream. this is really happening. this is a fucking nightmare. 

I woke up with a weight in my chest and it was hard to breathe. All through the day, randomly hit with the Weight, the nausea, the need to run away

I think about artists that had lost their moms at a relatively young age too. can find some solace in their works, their existence. not naïve view of the world and how painful it can really be. i can’t think about my old stories right now.

> spent the whole day there. i keep hearing her determination to fight and win this. switching insurance. she’s getting the best doctors and the best hospital. things feel normal. things will (?) be normal for a little longer. Treatment starts january 1. 

> by the end of the day, the lack of sleep over the past week was catching up to me. sore throat. Everyone is worried, so i leave. 

10/15 - Slept for 11 hours. The first day since Friday that i didn’t go over to visit. got a covid test just in case. Got my car checked (check engine light was on). refilled the empty gas tank. ate some of the food from my own fridge for once. filled out the form for therapy. talked to ned, i didn’t realize it had been 2 days already. i feel somewhat okay. I’m not good. but I haven’t cried today. My chest aches. it’s a dull heaviness. 

Image of- would it be worse if she’d never gotten cancer before? If this is a new, completely unknown wound in a new part of me? Or is it worse that this is the same old wound,- mostly healed over but gouged out with such force. fuck.

[there are more notes in email draft. “Where does home go when it dies?”]

I feel such an aversion to story-based art. to illustrations dense with storytelling and character and life and stories. i just want simple views. views grounded in real life. views that acknowledge life and death, not exploration and adventure. I’m thinking about Anna and how she lost her mom. how she has the conversation with Indi. I think about the White Stag that Kai sees. I can’t think about the adventures. I don’t want to think about getting over this. i know it will never stop hurting. 

The only way i can think about approaching art right now is if it’s in a different medium. I can’t approach my old art.

off the phone with ned and suddenly it’s quiet. don’t think mom is doing a walk today either so no going over there. it’s 3pm and there’s too much time left for it to be quiet. For the first time I suddenly have too much time, and I’m afraid of it. 

I don’t know why i’m not terrified today. When i first heard the news, i couldn’t stop crying as if she was already gone. I’m terrified to hold onto hope. but am hopeful now? is that why I haven’t cried today? i don’t want to be hopeful. i know every ounce of hope I hold onto just makes it more painful when it doesn’t come true. 

I read someone else’s experience of finding out a loved one had stage 4 cancer, how they felt the sudden desire to help loved ones, to be caring, to do everything in their power to make things better for others. And then once their loved-one died, a new grief, depression, loss of interest in everything. everything. / I can’t believe how much the initial part lines up with my feelings right now. Which means it will just get so much worse. I’m so scared of the future. I’m so scared of all the pain. I just want things to be okay

It’s 3:30 pm and it feels lonelier than my weekends on nightshift ever were

[impalaanddemons]

Gravity - Part 6

Summary: Reader’s a young security officer (Lieutanent Junior Grade) who happened to be on an away mission and fall hard for a certain Chief Engineer. Both of them aren’t the most outgoing regarding their feelings and tend to just watch each other from a distance, which is going to change.

Wordcount: 1816

A/N: Hope you enjoy :) I originally planned on posting this a lot later, but I figured I could already post it today.

This fiction is set in AOS

Warnings: diabetes inducing fluffiness

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

„I …“ you stuttered and felt like this was somehow unfair. You had imagined this question, from him, from time to time, in a fashion. But the circumstances had always been a bit more … romantic. There was usually a dinner involved, when you romanticized about it. Maybe a friendly banter in the gangways, or a surprise meeting in the jefferies tubes (well, this situation did occur - but as you very well remembered did play out a bit differently then expected). You certainly had not expected to lie in a biobed, a sedative running it’s course through your body and splattered with the blood of your best friend. Cas. The thought slit through your mind, sharp and cold as a knife. Over all your girlish pining, you had, for a second, forgotten about her. You could see that the thought had made it’s way onto your face, as the Engineers jolly expression in front of you started to crumble with doubt. „Yes, please“ you spluttered, your cheeks flashed red once more, hurriedly trying to reassure him. „I’m just …“, you started and hushed. „It’s just … Cas .. my friend …“, once again his hand found it’s way to your shoulder. Warmth swept over you. „She’s hurt, you know.“ - „I’ll assure ya“, he offered a warm smile. You wanted to bath and bask in it’s compassion. „Bones’ doin’ everything he can, and tha’ man can do a lot, lass. Your friend’s in the best hands in the galaxy“. A small smile crept to your lips. „I don’t want to press ya into anything in a situation like this, lass“, he continued and the notion of what kind of „anything“ he implied made your heart jolt with hopeful joy. „Thanks“, you mumbled in response. His hand carefully brushed over your shoulder, just lightly. Your eyelids felt heavy, the sedative and the last few hours finally taking their toll on your body. „I’ll leave ya to sleep, and then I’ll get ya in the evening“ - his voice was but a whisper on the horizon of your consciousness, accompanying you into deep, dreamless sleep.

After the initial first hours of deep, comforting sleep came a period of restlessness - slipping in and out of sleep. You would hear people bustle around, open your eyes for a split seconds before diving back into dreamland. Once someone yelled through the medbay. You couldn’t make out what was said, but the tone seemed serious. When you finally woke, nightshift was nearly due and you felt a slight headache throbbing behind your brow. „Nurse..?“, you straightened yourself carefully, evaluating if you felt sick because of the pain, or because you hadn’t eaten anything today. „How are you feeling?“ her brown hair was long and wavy. You didn’t know her, but her smile felt reassuring. „I’m.. better. You got a painkiller? I got slight headache and.. uh…“ the recollection of what happened before you fell asleep came together. „I think..how is Cassandra? Is she okay?“ the nurse took a hypo and applied it to your upper arm. It only took a few seconds, but at the time the nurse finished her sentence you could already feel the pain subsiding. „She’s stable for now. A major artery was pierced by that accident. We’ll have to wait.“ her voice was full of warmth, comforting. „And..“ she added with the touch of a smile. „I think someone’s waiting here.“ - „Oh“, you said. „Mr. Scott, Lieutenant Y/L/N is now awake, you can come in.“, she said, winked at you and prepared to leave the room: „Don’t overwork yourself, try to distract yourself a bit - you won’t help her getting all worked up. The Doctor expects you for checkup tomorrow morning and you’re off shifts for at least two days.“ she nodded to you and as she strode out of the room, a blondish Engineer made it’s way into your room. His warm smile brightened your evening.

„Come, I’ll help ya get out of this bed“ he offered you his arm and you laid your hand onto it. Your hand shook a bit and you hoped he didn’t notice. If he did, he was a gentleman about it.. „Thanks for .. escorting me, Scotty.“ you smiled and got up, still feeling a bit shaky on your legs. „How’s you’re friend?“ he asked, searching your face for any emotion. „Stable. We’ll have to wait …“ you took a deep breath: „Just .. let’s get out of medbay … okay?“. The expression on his face softened: „Aye.“

The way to your quarters was not too far, but you were walking more slowly then usual, perhaps trying to extend the time you spent with your handsome companion. „I hope you’re not angry with me, but in light of recent events I filed a faux repair to ..uh… rig your replicator.“- „You ..what?“. He grinned at you with an impish grin. „I thought we might enjoy .. a meal together .. and you might enjoy some .. quiet after what’s happened… and standard replicator settings are good for everyday stuff, but I thought you deserved a treat after what had happened and there’ll be no need to go to the mess hall…“ he was babbling. You didn’t notice right away, but he was just getting this string of thoughts out of his system. Babbling. Not only you were nervous, but he was too. You stretched your fingers and the skin of your hand brushed against his, you felt hot blood flushing your cheeks again. „Thanks…“ you interrupted him „I’d really love to have dinner with you“ you said gingerly, beaming up at him. You could swear his cheeks just exhibited the tiniest amount of red. „A’right, lass.“. For the rest of the way you walked in silence, simply enjoying each others company. Arriving at your quarters you unlocked them and stepped inside. „It’s … probably a bit more cramped then you’re used to…“ you mumbled, shifting sneakily over to the chair where a pair of socks was lying around. „It’s fine, lass“, he smirked. Of course, he’d been here to work on your replicator. „We.. we got a small table .. and.. uh .. we can move the stuff away“, just as you started to shuffle around, he put his hand on your shoulder and squeezed you gently. „Stop it, lass. Go get a shower, I’ll take over the rest.“ you opened your mouth to protest, but he just shook his head. „Doctor McCoy will have my head if you strain yourself now.“ After that you spent the next few minutes in limbo: While you quickly showered in the bathroom, he would yell the occasional questions and you replied over the running water. „What’s your favorite food? „Ya got plates?“ „Knife and Fork?“ „Ya want somethin’ special to drink?“ When you got out of your bathroom, hair still damp and with fresh clothes, he waved you off as you tried to help him. „Sit, Lass, ya dinnae wanna be responsible for the Doctor bein’ angry with me, do ya?“ „Here we go“, his smile was bright and captivating. He set two plates in front of the both of you. He had even cleaned that table of papers that had been lying around. „Thanks, Scotty .. enjoy your meal?“ you grinned and felt how the pressure of the last few hours slowly peeled away from you, layer by layer. After you had passed the first awkward moments, conversation began to flow easily between you. Laughing and smiling you found that you really enjoyed each others company. „So … one of the Ensigns said: ‚Nah, he’s never going to notice‘ and just downed the whole thing in one go“, Scotty laughed and you had tears in your eyes. „When we get first on board“, you began while the Engineer got up and cleaned the table, „we’ll have a crossing-the-line-ceremony in Security, you know, after we leave earth“ He lifted his eyebrows: „I didn’t know. Tell me more.“

„It’s a bit mean, although it does end with one big illegal party“, you continued and he stifled a laugh: „I bet it does“. „Well, we get the new Ensigns, fresh from Starfleet Academy, blindfold them and walk them down into the belly of the ship into a jefferies tube. Afterwards we measure the time it takes for them to get back to a designated quarter.“ you cleared your throat, but grinned. It was not nice, but it was fun, everyone did it and the Ensigns were welcomed as heroes, when they finally arrived. Montgomery Scott let out a single loud laugh: „Ya don’t?“ - „Yeah, we do. But we do lose someone occasionally“, you winked at him. „How did you do?“ - „Ah..“ you blushed, which of course made him push you for more information. „Come on, you can tell ol’ Scotty here“. „I .. got kinda lost…“ you giggled - you had had no drink tonight, but a warm feeling filled your belly anyways. „Ran an engineer over that was just fixing something and in the end I knocked on the wrong quarter and woke up my senior officer who was of course not amused.“ He started to laugh first, but you joined him soon afterwards. It was one of those memories that got funnier the more time passed.

You were interrupted in your laugh by the beeping of Scottys communicator. He glanced at it, then sighed and shot you a look somewhere between embarrassment and deep regret. „I’m sorry lass, but I’ll have to get that.“, he got up and you followed him to the door. „Thanks..“, you began:„That was.. very nice of you Scotty, you didn’t have to…“. You already felt sorry for the abrupt end of a perfectly wonderful evening, and he certainly looked the same. „Shush, lass. ‘t was nothing.“ the door was now half open, but he still stood there. „I…“, your sentence got lost after the first word and you smiled awkwardly up to him. „I enjoyed the evenin’, lass.“, his voice was nearly a whisper now. You held your breath and followed an impulse to get closer to him. His eyes searched yours, for a second, and then you felt warm lips on yours, touching you carefully, as if asking for permission. You let your breath out in a sigh, heat flushing to your face and leaning into the kiss. As if he had waited for it, he closed the distance between you and his arms closed around you, pulling you in closer, longingly. „Y/N“, he mumbled at your lips and your hands reached up for his back, his neck, felt his muscles tensing. All despair was wiped from your mind, your body filled with heat and surprise and breathless happiness. You never had thought, never hoped for that. His right hand slid down to the small of your back and you tried to inch even closer. You opened your mouth, as did he, your tongues touching. He lifted his other hand to your neck, his grip firm. You could feel how rough the tips of his hands were from work and shuddered as you imagined those hands exploring more then just your neck.  His communicator beeped again. And again. „Dammit“, he growled. You slowly, unwillingly separated at the third ring of the device. „I’ll need to get tha’, lass. I’m so sorry.“, he ran his hand through his hair, as if to compose himself. His tongue ran over his lips, looking at you again. A lopsided smile appeared on his face. „Get some rest, Y/N“ he bent over to you and his lips brushed yours once more, then he was gone.

TAG LIST! EVERYONE: PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! PLEASE LIKE AND REBLOG IF YOU ENJOY IT :) OR LEAVE ME A MESSAGE

@kirk-enterprise @youre-on-a-starship @kaitymccoy123 @webhoard @inaugural13 @flowerbunbunny