#420 4 ever

[500-moths-in-a-trenchcoat]

for the new year, i have decided to make a couple edits and additions to the almighty Calendar. happy 2024.

IT JUST HAPPENS

DAY 15 GIVE IT UP FOR DAY 15

Thursday the 20th

The Fifth of Wednesday

Second Week of May: Eurovision

Sometime in June: That One Halloween Post Starts Circulating

Sometime in July: Dancing Pumpkin Man Video/Gif

WEEKLY EVENTS (at least the ones i celebrate)

Every Monday: Garfield Hates Mondays

Every Tuesday: Tom Servo Tuesday

Every Wednesday: It Is Wednesday My Dudes

Every Thursday: Out of Touch Thursday

Every Friday: Flat Fuck Friday

Every Saturday: Sea Slug Saturday

Every Sunday: Energy Sword Sunday

YEARLY EVENTS

January 1: Copyright Expiration Day

January 8: Spiders Georg Day

January 16: Appreciate a Dragon Day

January 18: Bug Race

January 29: Threshold Day

All of February: Funguary

ALSO All of February: Femslash February

February 3: WOE, VANILLA EXTRACT BE UPON YE

February 13: Galentines Day

February 14: Aromantic/Asexual Day

March 9: Miku Day

March 10: Mario Day

March 14: Pi Day

March 15: Ides of March

March 23: Ever Given Got Stuck Today

April 1: Mishapocalypse

April 2: Dashcon Announcement Anniversary

April 3: Dannypocalypse

April 8: Rex Manning Day

ALSO April 8: MARGARET THATCHER IS DEAD

April 13: Neil Banging Out The Tunes

ALSO April 13: Homestuck Day

April 20: haha 420 blaze it

April 25: The Perfect Date

April 28: Ed Balls Day

April 30: It's Gonna Be May

All of May: Mermay

May 3: Beginning of Dracula Daily

May 4: May the 4th Be With You

May 5: Revenge of the Fifth

May 25: The Glorious 25th of May

All of June: Pride Month

ALSO All of June: IT'S HALLOWEEN TIME TO GET SPOOKY

June 5: Barricade Day

ALSO June 5: RONALD REAGAN IS DEAD

June 12: Another Homestuck Day

June 16: Let Papyrus Say Fuck

June 22: Summerween

All of July: Disability Pride Month

July 11-13: Dashcon Anniversary

July 20: Moon Landing

September 8: The Queen Is Dead and Sans Undertale Killed Her

September 11: Mole Interest Monday

September 19: Talk Like A Pirate Day

September 21: DO YOU REMEMBER-

All of October: SKELETON WAR

ALSO All of October: People Draw A Lot Month? (so many names)

October 3: Mean Girls Day

ALSO October 3: Fullmetal Alchemist Day

October 13: Treat Yo' Self

October 20: Unnecessary Feelings Day

October 31: HALLOWEEN

November 5: honestly what didn't happen that day

November 19: Goncharov

November 29: HENRY KISSINGER IS DEAD

All of December: Will the Gävle Goat Get Destroyed Again?

December 10: Please, It's Christmas

December 12: Hawaii Part 2

December 23: Christmas Adam

December 24: ALMOST CHRISTMAS MEANS IT WASN'T CHRISTMAS

ALSO December 24: Cabinet Man Day

December 27: Porn Ban Effective Today

[blkkizzat]

❛ MY SHORTY ALWAYS ON SOME BULLSHIT LIKE CHICAGO ❜

part of the 420 'We Be Burnin' dispensary series

⋙ MENU ITEM: PLUG!CHOSO x SORORITYBRAT!READER ⋙ PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 (completed)

⋙ product description (summary): you can't stop fucking your drug dealer with the big dick but you can't let your reputation be ruined by actually dating him—he'll just have to deal with it—or is it that he will end up dealing with you? ⋙ side effects (tw): cunnilingus, car sex, backshots, riding, dick sucking, sex for drugs, slut reader, reader being a huge bitch lmfao. slightly black girl coded but no descriptors. this is just p1 tw, p2 will have its own lol. ⋙ thc levels (wc): 3.9k of 22.1k ⋙ inventory notes (a/n): best viewed in dark mode. had to split it up into two parts because i wanted to post on time for 420. barely made it lol!

Plug!Choso who you walked all the way across campus to meet, nervously waiting in the almost always empty parking garage underground level. You don’t even really smoke weed but sorority elections are coming up soon and if you can be the “cool one” to get everyone lit on 420 (as your last plug recently got busted) you could secure a lot more votes. Sure, you were going to an extreme length to win but the last 4 generations of your family have been president of this chapter at your university. You didn't think your mother would even let you back in the house this summer if you didn’t win. So reluctantly, here you are. 

Plug!Choso who when he finally pulls up intimidates you with his looks when he rolls down his window as he’s all dark hair, piercings and tattoos. You want to just do the transaction through the window but he tells you to “get in”. You were a new customer and he had to vet you first to make sure you “weren’t 12.”

Plug!Choso who laughs in your face when you angrily slam the door taking offense and yelling at him if he ‘that regardless of your baby face he was fucking blind if he really thought you looked like a 12 year old.’ You turn up your nose at him but quickly are made to feel like an idiot when he clarifies he meant 12 as in the cops. You blush even harder when he says ‘he’d never mistake anyone with tits like yours for being that young.’

Plug!Choso who you only end up hooking up with because your sorority sisters short changed you. How the hell were you supposed to know an ounce was $250!? You ask if he could let you have a deal at $150 as that's what your old dealer Mahito sold it for before he got busted.

“S’cause his shit was weak, princess. Shouldn’ve even been payin’ that much to be real with you. This is that dank shit and if you want it you gotta pay. I ain’t running a charity.”

You ask if you can pay via venmo, cash app, anything but Choso only takes cash.

Panicking as you did not have $100 extra bucks in cash it’s you who suggests if you could you pay it off in a different way. 

Plug!Choso isn’t one to get sexual favors for weed as he had bills to pay and a baby brother to take care of, but your cute prissy ass reminds him so much of girls from his high school. The ones who’d only ever looked at him back then with disdain. Who came from stable families, were spoiled rotten and thought anyone who didn’t live their perfect cookie cutter life was trash. Choso wasn’t a virgin but he’d lived a damn near celibate life for the last few years, he could use a little stress release from a lil’ snobby thing like you.

Plug!Choso who you only agreed to give a handjob to and you unbuckled the belt on his tattered black jeans as he sits back and lights a joint. You roll your eyes and steel your nerves with a breath as you pull down his boxers. However the sight of his freed cock immediately has your inner slut going crazy. 

How is it that you can’t fit your pink manicured nails completely around his thick shaft?  

Why did his dick have to be so pretty fully erect, red tip throbbing as he pusles in your hand when you tease his frenulum with the pad of your finger? 

And just what's gotten into you now? It's shameful how you're rubbing your thighs together just from seeing him throw his head back while biting his lip to keep from whimpering. You have his sculpted hard abs trembling from you flicking over the bent barbell of his prince albert piercing. 

The silver reflected even in the dim garage lighting as his thick pre collected in drops on the ball of the piercing before dribbling down your hand. You unconsciously wet your lips. You know you only said a hand job but you wanted a taste—badly.

It isn’t long before you are giving into your cravings and talking him fully into your mouth needing a taste of him and forcibly gagging around his girth curious to see how much his cock could have you choking. 

Plug!Choso’s eyes flew open and he almost dropped his joint once he felt the hot n’ slick wetness of your velvety tongue slurping up the pre leaking off his piercing and taking him fully into your throat until he was hitting tonsils. 

Yet it’s because you are the massive slut that you are, it’s an even shorter amount of time before you pop him out of your mouth, lift your skirt and slide your panties to the side in order to bounce on him raw in the driver's seat. He makes you cum so hard your squirt splashes to drench his pants and even hits his dashboard and steering wheel. He reluctantly has to lift you off him at the last minute so he doesn’t come inside, further soiling you and his car. Choso doesn’t mind though as seeing you getting that messy for him made him hard all over again— and he pulls you into the backseat for round 2 which consists of you face-down ass-up getting the backshots of your fucking life.

Plug!Choso who you quickly start secretly hooking up with on the regular. Seeing as everyone loves how hard his shit hits they send you more frequently to pick it up. You pretend like it's a minor inconvenience but your stomach clinches in anticipation thinking of his fat cock inside of you. Of course, you aren’t disclosing to your sorority sisters how his dick hits even harder than his than his weed. You shiver just thinking of it carving through your guts ruthlessly every time you fuck. 

Plug!Choso who you are now secretly texting ‘cowboy’ and ‘eggplant’ emoji whenever you want your doonies beat down— regardless if you are getting weed from him or not that day. However when you are sent to get weed from him, he isn’t even charging you any longer. He tells you to keep it and get a new full set. You always manage to fuck up your acrylics bad when you are with him. Not your fault he fucks you so good you are desperate in the moment to cling to him, the handles, the dashboard— whatever you could get your hands on to grip to keep from loosing your mind as you always end up fucked absolutely dumb. 

Plug!Choso who you end up low-key dating but you are still a huge bitch to him in public. Acting like you don't know who he is when you see him. Tsk, you were just begging for him this morning to meet you in the ‘usual spot’ in the near abandoned campus garage lot so he could fuck you. You treated him like he was dirt beneath your shoe whenever you’d see him even though you’d be crying on his cock beneath him just a few hours prior. Choso thinks it’s disrespectful and annoying as fuck but he just deals with it. It's not like he's caught feelings or anything yet.

Plug!Choso who puts up with your shitty attitude and being your dirty little secret as you are the best— and only pussy— he’s had in a while. Not to mention you are always super sweet to his brother Yuji, who adores you. Choso didn’t intend to ever have you meet him but he ended up having Yuji with him one day. He had to pick him up out of the blue as an emergency near the same time he was supposed to pick you up from the nail salon. 

Although you had even got a fresh wax at the salon and were ready to show it off, finding Yuji, all of 7 years old, in the backseat was an immediate buzz kill. Initially expecting Choso to tell you that’s his kid, a pang of guilt ran through you when he explained his little brother who he takes care of got sick at school and needed to be picked up right away. You weren’t answering his calls or texts and he didn’t want to leave you hanging without a ride. 

You don’t tell Choso you’ve silenced notifications from him (in case one of your sisters were to see his name popup). Instead, you offer to cook Yuji soup when you learn it's only Choso solely taking care of Yuji. Especially after Choso confesses he was just going to pick up a can of chicken noodle and some crackers from the store. 

Heart fluttering at how gentle you are with Yuji in contrast to your usual demanding and bitchy nature, Choso curses at himself that he might be falling in love with you. Although he is well aware his feelings would never be reciprocated by you. Nevertheless, as a ‘thank you’ for dinner, after putting Yuji to bed Choso eats you out for 2-hours straight on the sofa. You end up having to stuff your soggy panties in your mouth to keep your cries in and not wake up Yuji. The way Choso is sloppily munching on your pussy has you cumming deliciously back to back to back on his thick pliable tongue. 

Plug!Choso who after you end up fucking more at his house, a mile or so away from campus, rather than his car these days. In fact, it isn’t even all about sex anymore as you spend the majority of your time over there helping Yuji with his homework, baking cookies, playing games and movie nights with the two of them. 

Once Yuji would go to bed Choso would bring you to the basement to smoke you out before he fucked you out. It’s during one of these smoke sessions though you learn that Choso actually got a full ride scholarship to go to the same university you do now 5 years ago but one quarter into his first year his parents had both died in a tragic accident. Yuji was only 2 then and the thought of losing the only family he had left to foster care was not an option for Choso. When the time came he stepped up to the plate and didn’t think twice about dropping out. 

However fast food jobs and grocery store shifts weren’t cutting it. He’d have to spend nearly all day and night away from Yuji just to keep a roof over his head to afford his late-parent’s mortgage. Dealing, although dangerous, was the best option and being the actual genius Choso was, he was smart about it. More guilt fills you always assumed anyone slanging drugs on the street was a burnout who couldn’t cut the real responsibilities of life. Yet Choso already had way more responsibility than anyone his age should have had.

You had sorely misjudged him.

Plug!Choso who realizes sooner than you do the closer the two of you become the harder it is for you to juggle Sorority life and Choso and Yuji— it’s almost as if you are living a double life. Truthfully you are, in a way as you are always sneaking off. Choso wonders what lies you tell your sorority sisters to be gone most weeknight evenings and weekend mornings. The lies of ‘labs' or ‘volunteer work’ wouldn’t likely cut it much longer. When you’re not around, Choso reasons he should probably cut things off with you before the inevitable fall out happens. But he always reconsiders when Yuji kept consistently inquiring as to where his ‘pretty lady girlfriend is’.  

Choso doesn’t have the heart to tell Yuji you aren’t his girlfriend yet. 

Plug!Choso who starts inviting you to Yuji’s little league games on weekends once Yuji expresses with abundant enthusiasm he wants you to see him play! The little guy, who is not so little for his age, is actually pretty athletic. Adorably every home run he hits he always makes sure to wave to you and Choso in the stands. Grinning widely Yuji blushes at your praise and cheering for him, which makes you just want to cheer harder. Your high school cheerleading experience finally coming in handy again. You go so often that sometimes other parents mistake the two of you for Yuji’s mom and dad. You always hastily respond “I’m just a family friend!”

A family friend. Not Choso's girlfriend. 

Plug!Choso whose jaw clenches whenever this happens— not that you ever notice. What the fuck were you doing if you weren’t dating? Yet Choso knew he couldn’t be completely mad at you as even after 3 months he still hadn’t technically asked you to be his girlfriend. Still that fact angers Choso too as he knows he hasn’t because he fears— no he knows— you wouldn’t say yes. Choso picks you up and drops you off blocks away from campus. You also managed to deflect every suggestion for going out on an actual date night on the town when Yuji is over his friend's Megumi or Nobara houses. Also you sure as shit don’t invite him to the many greek life parties you attend (not that he even wanted to go— I mean he would for you. If you'd ask him). Hell, you don’t even follow him back on IG and he knows better than to like or comment on anything other than your stories which goes straight to your DMs. 

Plug!Choso knows you have a reputation to protect and how it would look for the tall n’ scary pierced n' tatted emo drug dealer to be the one by your side. Choso eventually resigns himself to live in the shadows of your life for now. Choso would just have to work harder to pay off the house so he could stop dealing and be someone you’d want to show off (even if deep down he feels he will never be good enough).

However this all comes to a boil a few weeks later the morning of the championship game for Yuji’s little league. As their star player Yuji was so excited to be in his first championship and made you pinky promise you would come. 

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world, kiddo!” You lovingly beamed at him. 

But you lied.

You did miss it. 

Finals and the sorority election week had come up fast out of nowhere and hit you like a whirlwind. As a result you saw little of Choso and Yuji in the days leading up to it. Yet at the end of the week you emerged victorious, both in keeping up your 3.8 GPA and winning the election for sorority president. You were so ecstatic on both accounts that you partied hard the night before Yuji’s big game.

Coincidentally forgetting about it entirely as the next morning was the Annual Greek Council Brunch event to officially inaugurate all new Greek council members across all sororities and frats. As newly elected president and since your sorority was hosting this year it was your job to throw it. It was a huge event that even parents and chapter alumni attended. 

Plug!Choso who smoked 3 cigarettes as he waited for you for nearly 40 minutes before he knew he had to leave soon or he’d miss the start of the game too. Deciding to drive by your sorority as a last ditch effort Choso sees red when he spies you on the lawn giggling and flirting with the campus caterers as you direct them to the back of the house. You looked gorgeous, all dolled up, hair done and make-up flawless. The dress you wear looks expensive, something he might even be able to afford to buy you if he wasn’t making triple mortgage payments each month to cut the interest and pay off his home faster. However, he can't deny the baby blue checkered fabric looks great on you. A fact Choso notices the caterer douchebags didn’t miss either as they fall a few steps behind you to check out your plump ass and rib at each other.

Plug!Choso who knows the reasonable thing to do would be to just drive away and avoid any conflict. Although before his mind registers it his body is already flicking his cigarette butt out of the open car door before slamming it shut as he storms across the lawn of your sorority house. Reaching the back of the house Choso was taken back by how grand everything looked. A sea of pristine white tables adorned with arrays of bouquets, fine china and crystal glasses that sparkled divinely in the morning sun. The event was still in setup mode so more flowers, decorations and adornments were being brought in by the second by workers brushing past Choso like he wasn't even there.

In any other scenario a grand display of refinery such as this would have Choso feeling self-conscious and out of place. He is aware as good as anyone else how sorely his dark looks contrast with the peppy and airy vibes of greek life.

However, all that flees out of his mind as soon as he sees you near the DJ booth—now having the nerve to shamelessly flirt with him too. 

“Yo, princess.”

Plug!Choso who seems casual from his tone but the look on his face is anything but. You on the other hand looked as if you had seen a ghost as all the color drains from your face. 

“Choso!”

You squeaked out a greeting as your head whips around to see who all was around.

Phew! Thankfully it was mostly staff and the greek members who were helping with setup were still inside.

But what the fuck was Choso even doing here?

You started to get pissed as he knew better than to roll up on you like this and today of all days!? 

“Come on, let’s go, we're gonna be late.”

He grabs your arm which you quickly snatch back from him giving him an incredulous look as if he just sprouted two more heads.

“What the fuck Choso, you can’t just barge in here like this! Have you lost your mind?! What are you even doing here?!” 

You try to keep your voice hushed as you pull him to the side of the DJ booth trying not to draw attention. 

“Nah princess, the question is what the fuck are you doing here?”

Irritation was dripping from Choso’s words who clearly didn’t give a single fuck about how loud he was being or the boundaries you’d set around your school life and it made your blood boil. He knew this was a busy week for you and you wouldn’t be around as much, he couldn’t wait a few more days!?

What right did he have to be here right now?

Let alone be this upset with you? 

You roll your eyes as you scoff. 

“Well as I am the newly elected president of this sorority it's my job to throw this brunch! I’ve had a really long stressful week and this is a really big event for me. My first event even! I have so much–”

“—Fuck! Are you really this clueless?!”

Choso angrily snaps at you and you are visibly startled into silence as his interruption immediately shuts you up.

He’s towering over you now and you’ve never realized before just how much bigger than you he was. His personality was usually so chill and unassuming that it shrunk his overall presence.

Come to think of it you’ve never even seen him angry before, annoyed sure, but he was clearly mad mad now.

“I– Me– My— Goddamn it, do you really think of no one but yourself?!”

The DJ, who had been overhearing your conversation tries to butt-in to white knight for you but is quickly told off by Choso who tells him ‘walk the fuck on while he still had legs that could walk’. The advice which was expeditiously taken as the DJ quickly left the conversation just as fast as he’d entered it.

“Choso– what the—”

Choso doesn’t let you finish, cutting you off again.

Fed up with this, you and whatever twisted situationship you currently had— he needed to say his piece. 

“—I’ve been waiting for you for almost an hour, princess. Does your self absorbed lil’ brain even remember why?”

Your own anger is quickly dissipating into confusion as you cannot fathom what in the hell Choso was even talking about. It takes you a few good moments but your eyes widen once you realize.

Oh shit…

“Umm…Y-Yuji’s big game, isn’t today– is it?”

You meekly asked but you already knew the answer. 

“Bingo, princess! You’d promised him you’d be there. Do you know how much he’s been looking forward to this? It’s all he’s been talking about. Do you know how crushed he’s going to be if you aren’t there?!”

Shit! Shit! Shit!

You knew balancing seeing Choso and Yuji with your increasingly demanding school life was starting to get more challenging but you didn’t realize you’d fuck up this badly.

You really didn’t want to disappoint Yuji, who at this point felt like your own little brother that you never had —but you’d be prepping for this sorority presidency nearly your entire life! 

Your parents were even coming to this! 

Shit, which reminds you Choso cannot be here when they show up. 

Plug!Choso who knows he’ll have to speed now when he leaves if he wants to make the first pitch of Yuji’s game and makes one last ditch effort to get you to attend, but of course it fails.

“Choso, I– I can’t. I want to... but you know how important this is to me. My family. They will be here soon too I—”

Choso tunes out the rest of your excuses as your mention of ‘my family’ had cut unintentionally deep.

You’d gotten so close to him and Yuji that you did feel like ‘their family’. But you weren’t and it was the foolish hope that you could one day become that Choso selfishly indulged in.

He could deal with the hurt, he was used to life shitting on him but it wasn’t fair to Yuji. 

“There he is! That’s him!”

The pussy ass DJ had gone and gotten back up as a group of frat guys in suits rushed over. The commotion was also drawing a few of your sorority sisters and you curse under your breath as a small crowd forms and all eyes draw to you.

“It’s okay guys, he’s clearly lost and is leaving now, right?”

Your voice is bitchy but your eyes are pleading with Choso.

You're pleading with Choso: Not to ruin the event.

Not to be angry with you.

And not to make this situation any worse than what it was. 

“Wait— this guy? He’s that burnout dealer, yeah?”

One of the frat guys chime-in and there's laughter and giggles around.

“Oh my god, it is! He's like so obsessed with her. I always see him creeping around.”

One of your sisters adds with a sneer.

“Not a stalker! Ew!” 

Another one adds.

“What does this weirdo even want with you!?”

More of your sisters chime in.

Choso doesn’t care though.

He only cares what you think. What you’re going to say.

Your phone dings and you look at it. Shit. Your parent’s just arrived on campus.

You didn’t want to do it this way but you had to end this now.

It was better this way. That’s what you would console yourself with later at least.

“Look—Choso was it? This is a private event and you need to leave.”

You turn to your sisters to explain further. “I tutor his little brother for my volunteer work and he somehow got the crazy idea that I was going to go to some little baseball game with them or whatever.”

You turn back to Choso.

“Well— as you can clearly see. I can’t go. I’m busy and like I said this is a private event so again, you need to leave, understood?”

You turn away not being able to stomach the look on his face like a coward and make up some excuse about checking on the ice sculpture which should have been already placed on one of the center banquet tables. 

You know he’s left from the jeers of ‘bye loser!’ ‘fuck outta here freak!’ echo out from the garden. 

This was for the best after all….

….right? PART 2

⋙ ©blkkizzat 2024. do not steal works or gfx, do not translate.

⋙ lol y/n is a huge bih who doesn't deserve our sweet baby. no worries though she is gonna learn her lesson good in part 2 where she finds out shit ain't so sweet lmfao. lmk if you wanna be tagged in comments/reblogs. eta— omg there were so many errors lmfao see this is what happens when i dont re-read my shit 50x before posting lol. i fixed it! sorry to anyone who read it before lol. ⋙ reblog to smoke on choso's joint but comments and likes are appreciated!

[liberty-spiked]

kay, did my "do i fit into the job" test and i just straight up cant divide numbers above 100? well im a dirty punk so i dont divide i unite, bitch

[yalikejazzo-o]

happy day late 4/20 >;)

here are some 420 headcannons for Leo and Usagi

-Usagi is a bit of a stoner. not like crazy or anything but he smokes more than Leo and i feel like it adds some humor to his calm personality

-the first time leo ever smoked was with Usagi, he problably thought the other was so cool while the inner medic in him cringed.

-Usagi gets really sentimental and will randomly start giving aheartfelt speech about life, the meaning of the universe and the power of freindship

-most often leo ends up rambling while high and usagi will more just zone out.

-sometimes when they smoke theyll have deep conversations and really open up to eachother and the rest of it is the two of them crying luaghing over a random roach in the corner or some shit.

-they have the best za induced cuddle naps, they sleep like a brick

[junkissed]

april 20th: pot luck

member — fwb!chan x f reader genre — smut, fwb to lovers word count — 3.2k synopsis — you're no stranger to smoking in the park on 4/20, but smoking in the park while chan begs you to let him make you cum? that's new. content warnings — marijuana use (smoking), there's angst for like 3 seconds but not really smut warnings — descriptions of female anatomy, oral (reader receiving), fingering, sexual acts in a semi-public setting (they're in a secluded area of a park), sexual acts while high, shotgunning, chan is clingy & cute when he's high :) disclaimer — this story is a work of fiction. both chan and reader are portrayed as consenting adults above the legal age of 21. always make sure your partner is someone you trust and have talked with beforehand while sober. remember to practice safe, consensual sex! notes — requested by @angelwoozi 🧸!! this concept is going to sit in my brain forever now agsdjkfahsd i hope you like it! also tagging @bitchlessdino because it would be a sin if i didn't. happy 420!

you hold the pre-rolled joint between your fingers, watching the way the thin smoke spirals off the end of it. chan holds out his hand as you exhale, and you pass it back to him for him to take his turn.

it's the secluded end of the park, where the trees are thicker and shadier and the grass is always a little bit damp, even during hot summer afternoons. a cool breeze blows today, and distantly you can hear birds chirping and the shuffling footfalls of joggers making their way around the park's running paths.

you lay back, settling down on top of the worn, quilted picnic blanket you keep in your car. for the first time in a while the weather's been nice enough to draw you outside, spring gradually melting into summer.

he holds the joint out towards you but you wave him off, so he sets it at the edge of his ashtray, the little yellow painted one you made him for his birthday in a ceramics class from a few semesters ago.

chan leans back too, propping himself up on one elbow as he reaches for his water bottle absently.

laying on your back, you can see each leaf on the tree, and when the wind blows you can see bits of blue sky peeking through the swaying branches. you hear chan call your name, but you ignore him, just wanting to watch the world go by for a moment. or maybe, you just pretended to hear him call your name. you seem to do that a lot recently, imagining him doing things until you aren't sure what's real or dreamed.

ever since new year's eve when you accidentally on-purpose slept with him and then maybe kept sleeping with him for months afterward, nothing's been the same. despite the fact that you definitely like him as more than just a friend you have sex with, you’ve never talked about it with him because he seems more than fine with keeping things simple; you wish he didn’t, but you don’t want to push him, so you just stick to having sex and sharing your weed.

it turns out him calling your name was, in fact, real, because a few seconds later you see his figure looming over you, blocking your view of the leaves and the sky.

your words come out lilted. "what is it, chan?"

"can i eat you out?"

you blink slowly a few times, thinking and processing his sentence and repeating it in your head so many times until you'd forgotten what he'd actually said.

"eating what? we had tacos earlier. i’ll make you a sandwich or something when we go back, i told you you should’ve brought more snacks to munch on."

“noooooo.” he whines and flops down onto the blanket on his side. "wanna eat you," he grumbles. his fingers find your arm and begin drawing shapes and patterns along your skin as he waits for your response.

it finally clicks in your mind what he's asking, and with much effort you roll your head over to look at him. "why?"

"because it's a nice day outside," he says, fingers trailing down to your wrist. "and i like it. oh my god, you're so hot. like… woah. why wouldn't i want to?"

your heart jumps, and you can't tell if it's completely from his words or mixed with how stoned you are, but you feel so happy. he sounds almost affectionate.

you shift your legs, your pants starting to grow uncomfortable the more you begin to think about chan between your thighs. it's a sight you're familiar with, but one you can never quite seem to get used to.

you throw your arm over your head, tugging gently at the cool grass beneath your fingertips to ground you to earth. "but there's sooo many people out, chan," you say, a little more giddy than you intend. "you’re too high. somebody'll see."

he closes his eyes slowly and furrows his brow, thinking deeply.

"put your bag here, then," he says finally, rolling over onto his stomach to grab your tote bag from the edge of the blanket and haul it over to your hip. it was a good idea in theory, but in reality it barely covers a tiny part of your body, and it would only be effective at blocking his head from onlookers at a very specific angle.

his fingers brush over your thigh on accident, and you sigh, legs parting just slightly. chan doesn't seem to notice, though; he's latched himself to your arm again, tracing his name across your skin over and over like a kindergartener learning to write their name for the first time.

"you really want to?" you ask, peering over at him through foggy eyes but grinning when you see him now focused on the tiny hairs on your arm.

"yes, please," he hums, and he starts kissing the inside of your elbow along your forearm. his lips are warm and so, so soft, it feels like rays of sunshine tickling your skin. until he opens his mouth and he starts gnawing on you, biting gently at your arm.

you swat at the back of his head, and then once more, laughing at how silly he is. silly feels like the right word. silly how cute he is and silly how maybe you're a little bit in love with him.

"oka-ay," you say finally, tugging on his hair to get him to stop biting you. he rests his head on your stomach and gazes up at you with big, soft eyes, and you know there's nothing going on in his head right now. honestly, there's not much going on in yours either, but there's enough happening up there to know better than to not let him have what he wants.

you pull the bag closer to yourself and lift your hips, shifting your pants down just enough to expose the top of your thighs.

"don't let anybody see—" you start to say, but chan is already diving in. he shimmies down your body, positioning himself between your legs so that it would look like he's merely resting on top of you if anyone passing by were to steal a quick glance.

in your present state of mind, neither of you are quite as sneaky as you probably think. you can only pray no one walking around the park is paying much attention to their surroundings, though your spot is far enough away from the main paths that someone would have to be intentionally looking in order to find you.

one thing you know for sure is that chan is a messy eater. in the privacy of his apartment (or occasionally, yours) he'll spend hours between your legs, making out with your pussy until you're so exhausted and overstimulated that just the thought of another orgasm makes you shudder. usually he doesn't go that far, because at the end of it all he still wants to have his cock inside of you, but that doesn't ever stop him from making a complete mess of you anyways.

but to your surprise, when he kisses you over your underwear before pulling them down your hips, his lips are slow and gentle, like wading through water. you feel his fingers kneading your waist, and you realize belatedly that you've been tensed up. you'd been preparing for a fast, rough onslaught of pleasure but clearly chan has other plans today: taking his sweet time with you. and with how fuzzy your head feels right now, going slow is more than fine by you.

he flicks at your clit, laying his tongue flat and smoothing it over every inch of you before flicking again, and subconsciously you angle your hips upward, chasing his mouth. his spit covers your cunt, and when he moves his head back you can feel the breeze cooling the heat between your legs, sending a shiver up and down your spine.

you hear a shrill scream from behind you, and you tilt your neck back to see where the noise came from. upside down, you can see two kids distantly running around in the grass, playing a game.

you yank chan up by the back of his collar and pull your pants up as far as they'll go, ignoring the insane wedgie you've just given yourself as you scramble to look like you haven’t been doing anything suspicious.

you stay on your back, craning your head around to look at your surroundings. once you’re certain nobody’s around, your eyes settle on chan, who’s staring blankly back at you. his face glistens in the sunlight from the amount of wetness all over his face that he doesn't even seem to be aware of.

"wipe your mouth," you try to scold him, but the whole situation is suddenly so funny you can't help the laugh that comes out instead.

chan sits up, a little disoriented at first but he pushes through the clouds in his mind and finally brings his hand up to his face, swiping at his mouth once with the back of his hand. he looks around and he spies the ashtray with the half-smoked joint still sitting in it, and with a lazy grin he leans over to grab it, fumbling with his lighter to reignite it.

he takes a long, slow hit, and you're surprised he's not more out of breath from just having his face shoved in your pussy for what seemed like eternity.

he holds it out to you with a little grunt, and you finally find the energy to prop yourself up onto your elbows to take it from him. you inhale then breathe out a fine cloud of smoke as you pass it back to him, and he sets it back down, giggling to himself.

you smile, his laughter contagious with your already content mood. "what're you laughing at?"

he rolls his head around in a circle, staring off into the distance with a dopey grin on his face. "i… dunno," he answers finally, and he looks back at you, his eyes full of emotion you can't really understand fully.

"well, you almost got us caught, dummy," you tell him, an involuntary pout forming on your lips as you lay back down. "if you wanna have sex we should just go back to your apartment now."

"i don't want to," he whines, and you frown at him. he opens his mouth, stops and closes it again, then finally speaks, seemingly having gathered all his words together in the right order. "of course i always wanna have sex with you but right now i wanna make you cum first. like, right now, right now." he looks over at you again with those big, stupid, pretty eyes of his. "ple-ease?"

"but somebody might see again, channie. you can make me cum at home."

he shakes his head slowly. "but we still have to finish this, anyway," he protests, pointing at what's left of the joint.

you lose focus and stare off at the trees again, knowing he's right. you'll have to stay until it's out, then clean up your blanket and put away your stash, so it's not like you were gonna get home anytime soon then, right?

he turns towards you suddenly, his mouth half open like he's just thought of something crazy. he carefully transfers the joint to your hand, wrapping your fingers around the end of it. "how about i finger you, and you can hold this for me until you cum, and then we finish it and we go home and fuck. holding two birds with one stone."

you glance around, hoping nobody heard him loudly exclaim that he wants to finger you. you think about telling him to keep it down, or at least correct his attempt at a metaphor, but the words feel like too much effort and you're still weary from the almost-orgasm just a few minutes ago.

you stare at the object he had put in your hand for a second before you decide to take a drag, putting your other hand on chan's neck to pull him close so you can exhale the smoke into his lips.

clearly he wasn't expecting it, and he coughs a couple times, but he recovers and immediately goes in to kiss you again. he kisses you for so long it feels like he's never going to pull away, and when you do finally let go for a second it seems like he isn't even breathing.

he just sighs dreamily, his eyes still closed. "i love kissing you," he says, and the way he says it makes it sound so important.

you elbow him in the chest lightly to get his attention, and he lets out a little "oof!" and opens his eyes.

"hurry up so we can go home. i wanna suck your dick," you say, clearly deciding to let him have his way as you push your pants down once more.

his hand slides over your body, and the way he smiles when his two fingers make contact with your pussy gives you goosebumps. his touch feels heavenly, and you have to put all your focus on holding the joint upright so you don’t accidentally drop it. but it’s so hard to stay focused when you can feel his fingers so deep inside you, moving in and out and curling and scissoring and it drives you crazy.

at least in this new position, it’s not as obvious what you’re doing. with shaky hands you take another hit, a bigger one this time, trying to finish it as fast as you can so you can go home and not have to worry about being seen.

chan pushes a third finger into you and you hold back a whimper, wrinkling your nose in pleasure.

he opens and closes his mouth at you, and there’s a few seconds before your brain catches up and you realize he wants you to help him smoke while his hands are occupied. you carefully hold the joint up to his mouth and he wraps his lips around it.

the sight of him laying on his side, his hand cupping your cunt as you act like his personal helper is hotter than you expect it to be, and you clench around his fingers, heat burning in your abdomen.

he sucks in a sharp breath and leans his head away from your hand to cough again. “are you— close?” he asks once he’s recovered, his tone almost pouty. “you’re squeezing my hand so hard and now my dick hurts because i imagined fucking you instead.”

you sigh, leaning your head back against the blanket and letting your eyes close again, your hand propped up in the air. “yeah… i reeally wanna fuck you.”

he pries the joint out of your hand to take a hit by himself, then puts it back in your grip and moves his other hand to massage your breast over your shirt. you whine, not expecting it, and buck your hips up.

“fuck, chan– faster, please,” you mumble, your head swimming.

he puts his thumb to your clit and presses down, his fingers moving more roughly inside of you to draw you closer and closer. after a while you open your eyes, and you find him staring at you with such a sweet, empty look on his face, it makes you want to kiss him forever.

you pull him down on top of you and push your lips against his. your teeth clack with his but you don’t care, because you feel too good everywhere else to even pay attention to one little bad thing.

just like the way chan eats you out, he’s messy when he kisses you, and even more so when he’s high. you can taste yourself on his tongue and it makes you whine into him, the rest of the world falling away so that the only two people who exist in the entire world are you and him.

without warning you feel familiar waves wash over you and you practically go limp under him as your orgasm knocks the breath out of your lungs. he stills his fingers inside of you but continues to pet at your clit with his thumb as your walls spasm and contract around him.

when you start to regain some of what’s left of your senses you grab his hand to stop him, pulling him out of your aching pussy. he sighs and pushes his face into your chest, humming against your boobs.

caught up in the moment you hadn’t noticed when you’d dropped the joint, but luckily there was a god or some being out there in the universe that was on your side, because you’d dropped it directly onto the ashtray and not the blanket or the grass.

chan sits up and folds his legs cross-legged as he lights it one more time and hands it to you. there’s not much left of it by now, so it doesn’t take long for you both to finish it. your clothes stink of smoke and you’re a lot clumsier than usual, but you’re more content than you’ve been in a long time.

it’s not the first time you’ve had sex with him while high, but something feels different this time. maybe it was the way he clung to your arm walking back to his apartment, giggling with glee about how he couldn’t wait to have you all to himself. but it was probably more the fact that he told you he loved you right after you came and then proceeded to beg you to let him kiss you again.

of course you let him, your heart and your head soaring as you laid in the grass, casually making out for at least a quarter of an hour. you were in no rush to be anywhere, especially not when you had everything you wanted right here. and it seemed like he had everything he wanted, too: when you finally started to pack up your things to leave, he’d panickedly asked if you would stay with him.

“of course i’m staying,” you laughed, pushing him off of the blanket so you could fold it and put it away. “aren’t we going back to your place?”

“yeah, we are,” he said shyly, plucking a dandelion from the grass. “i meant like… all the time. i don’t wanna do this anymore.”

you looked at him, suddenly scared and a little confused at the sudden change from how excited he’d just been. “…you don’t want us anymore?”

he shook his head. “no, i want you! serious, like boyfriend and girlfriend! i want us to be us.” you don’t immediately respond, and he frowned.“you don’t want to?”

your eyes softened. “i do want to,” you smiled, crawling over to him to cup his cheeks in your hands. “i want to, very much.”

it would be a while before you finally made it back to chan’s apartment, but it was worth the wait. everything was worth the wait.

next year, when you sat in the same spot at the same park to spend your anniversary together, you joked that he had waited until april 20th to make it official because he’d wanted your anniversary to be on a funny date. but really you didn’t mind, because it just gave you more reasons to celebrate.

i hope you enjoyed this!! if you did, consider reblogging or leaving a comment or an ask :) it lets me know this is something people want to see more of and it helps a ton with being motivated to write. thanks for reading!!

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> if you want to be notified when i post a new fic, you can join my taglist here!

[nonsensical-pixels]

BASEMENT TREASURES: the latest sims 4 kit, converted to ts2! [download - sfs]

have you ever wondered what lies in your sim's basement? sure, most of us have a torture room or two stashed away, but what if your sim isn't olive specter or hazel dente? where's my moldy moisture-eaten couches and prehistoric electronics? well, starting today, they're right here!

the moment i saw that this kit had released, i literally RAN to convert it. it's perfect for my older hoarder sims. plus, a lot of people asked for it 😅

this is almost the entire kit, save for the unbeatable stains, which--surprise, surprise--refused to get converted along with the others. i have plenty of similar stuff, though, so i'm not too upset. in total there are 25 items: 24 buy mode assets, and 1 wallpaper.

note: just before i posted this, i saw that @2fingerswhiskey already converted the retroplex tv console--you can grab their version here!

keep reading for credits + more info!

credits

ea/maxis for the original ts4 meshes & textures

items included

there are individual previews included in the actual download!

Big Box of Irreplaceably Replaceable Things (396 polys) Brass Floor Lamp (806 polys) Candid Coffee Table (148 polys) Dated Drywall (7 swatches) Disassembled Heart Bed (1712 polys) Dusty Trinkets (259 polys) Forgotten Frames (620 polys) Grandma's Couch (1487 polys) Mementos of Glory (361 polys) Records of the Past (112 polys) Relic of Good Times (454 polys) Retroplex TV Console (424 polys) Shabby Cardboard Box (94 polys) SquareTube (420 polys) Strange Reminescence Framed Photo (214 polys) The Best Seat in the House (905 polys) The Fun of Yesteryear (106 polys) The Graceful Ambition Standing Mirror (544 polys) The Moving Buddy (842 polys) The Not-So-Mod Lamp (302 polys) The Traveller's Trunk (782 polys) Uncle Bob's Dusty Rubber Plant (804 polys) Unmatched Chairs (452 polys) Unstable Wall Shelves (166 polys) Weary Wall Decal (2 polys)

things to note

The 'Graceful Ambition Standing Mirror' is repo'd to the 'Forgotten Frames'.

The 'Retroplex TV Console' is decorative only, get 2fingerswhiskey's version if you want it to be functional! They won't conflict :)

The mirrors have a slight issue where the reflection includes the frame, I'm very sorry, I tried my best but I couldn't fix it :(

if there are any unmentioned issues, please do lmk asap! happy simming 💞

( @sims4t2bb )

[writtenbyafan]

Calculated Move

⟢ Pilot!reader; Call sign - Diablo ⟢ AN: not sure how i feel about this. just wanted the TGM squad reacting to Y/N flying the practice course instead of Maverick.

Penny: “I heard about what happened today. I'm sorry."

Maverick: "Who told you?"

Penny: "Y/N Kazansky called me earlier this afternoon.”

Maverick: "Diablo called you? How is she? I haven't heard from her since her father's funeral."

Penny: "I'm not sure. We didn't talk long, she just gave me the heads up. What are you going to do?"

Maverick: "Ice is gone. What choice do I have?"

Penny: "You'll have to find a way back on your own. If you lost your wingman up there, you'd keep fighting. You wouldn't just give up. Those are your pilot's. Rooster. Diablo. All of them, if something were happen, you'll never forgive yourself."

Maverick: "I don't know what to do."

~ The Next Day ~

Cyclone: "Captain Mitchell is no longer your instructor."

[Cyclone pauses when he notices Maverick quietly entering the room to stand along the back wall. Clinching his jaw, Cyclone sends the man a warning glare before continuing to explain the new mission plan.]

Cyclone: "And as of today, there are new mission Parameters. Time to target is now 4 minutes You'll be entering the valley level at reduced Speed. Not to exceed 420 knots."

Bob: "Sir, won't we be giving their planes time to intercept?"

Cyclone: "Well, Lieutenant, you have a fighting chance against enemy aircraft. You'll be attacking the target from a higher altitude, level with the north wall. Gonna be a little harder to keep your cage on target, but you will avoid the high-G climb out."

Fanboy: *mumbles* "We'll be sitting ducks for enemy missiles."

[Suddenly the monitor behind Cyclone starts beeping, drawing all eyes to it.]

[Cyclone watches as a F-18 single aircraft appears on screen approaching the training course.]

Cyclone: "Who the hell is that?"

Cyclone: *glares at Maverick* "Who the hell is that?!"

[As if they heard Cyclone's question, the pilot's voice plays over the speakers of the meeting room.]

Diablo: "Diablo to Range Control. Entering Point Alpha, confirm green range."

Range Control: "Diablo, Range Control. Green range is confirmed. I don't see an event scheduled for you, Lieutenant."

Diablo: "Really? That's weird. Well, since I'm already here, I'll run the course anyway. "

[Maverick couldn't help but chuckle at Diablo's words. Though, he made sure to keep it quiet lest Cyclone heard him.]

Cyclone: “What is she doing? Get her back to base now!”

Warlock: “Sir, we have no way of contacting her from here.”

Cyclone: “Has she ever successfully completed this course?”

Maverick: “She’s been close but hasn’t been successful yet.”

Diablo: "Setting time to target to two minutes 15 seconds."

Fanboy: "What is she playing at? 2:15? That's impossible."

Maverick: "You don't know, Y/N. She's got this."

Diablo: "Final attack point. Diablo's inbound."

[Everyone settled in as they watched the F-18 enter the go zone and the timer started counting down.]

[Diablo's F-18 was moving, weaving along the curves of the valley with expert skill. At one minute 30 seconds the F-18 had already passed the half way mark of the valley. Diablo was making excellent time.]

[From the back or the room, Maverick felt sick. It felt like his heart was trying to climb out of his throat as he watched Diablo's plane rip through the map.]

[As the timer counted down to 39 seconds, the F-18 cleared the valley and was heading straight towards the mountain for the first high-G climb.]

[Every member of the Dagger Team were at the edge of their seats. Trying to watch both the time and Diablo's progress.]

Diablo: *strained* "Popping in three, two, one."

[Effortlessly the F-18 began to ascend along the steep incline of the mountain. When the aircraft reached to top of the first climb, it flipped at the top and then descended approaching the target point.]

[It seemed like everyone in the briefing room collectively held their breath as they watched the F-18 approach the target. They all waited to see if Diablo could succeed at hitting the mark.]

[As soon as the targeting system beeped to confirm lock, Diablo dropped missiles.]

Diablo: "Bombs away."

[Diablo's F-18 began the second high-G climb as soon as the missiles were fired. Only 6 seconds remaining on the timer.]

[As her aircraft hit 9.0 G, Diablo fought with sheer will to stay conscious while she focused on keeping the targeting system locked. Through burry vision, Diablo watched as the missiles made contact.]

[At .16 milliseconds the timer stopped and all members of Dagger Team jumped out of their seats, cheering on their comrade.]

Bob: "Bulls-eye! Holy shit!"

Hangman: "I'll be damned. Baby Kazansky has skills."

[From beside him, Maverick noticed Hondo nodding his head, eyes locked on the recorded 10.0G Diablo had reached. Maverick grins in disbelief as the F-18 disappears off screen.]

Maverick, whispering: "Great job, Diablo.”

[Maverick watch with renewed hope as the Top Gun pilots got their confidence back. Diablo, one of their own, had shown them that this mission was not impossible. There was hope that together they could succeed and make it back alive.]

[skybrushus]

Note. To the best of my knowledge this is not based on any existing Fallout Equestria storyline, nor does it follow any particular plot in Fallout 4. This is just the narrative that popped into my head as I worked on this piece.

        Sweetie Belle sent a sphere glowing yellowish light down the partially collapsed hallway of the abandoned Stable. The sphere showed a reoccurring theme that she and Amber had observed since entering the ruins. Signs of flooding from the intrusion of rainwater. A lack of power or functional terminals anywhere in the ruins, and an extensive lichen, fungus, and crisscrossing plant roots on the walls, ceiling, and floor.

        However much to their surprise the Stable hadn't been picked clean by looters. Amber felt this was due to its remote location, and that the Stable's entrance had been partially buried by a landslide in the last 50 or so years. The lush local vegetation had camouflaged the rest.

        Sweetie thought looters had found it but had been discouraged by the moldy, mildew state of everything they'd encountered so far in this forgotten Stable. Also they'd encountered multiple hallways that blocked by what looked liked cave ins or impenetrable masses of dense, thick roots.

         Amber's flashlight made slow, constant sweeps as he checked the area immediately around them. Noticing something on a wall he spoke softly.

         "Sweetie hold up for a second." Slinging his submachine gun over his shoulder he approached it. There was lettering of some type that was barely visible beneath the accumulated dirt, lichen, and general muck. Donning a pair of heavy work gloves he started wiping the grime away. After few seconds he was able to read it.

          STABLE 420

          "Well now we know which Stable this was." The pony hybrid muttered. He looked over at Sweetie. "Ever heard of Stable 420?"

           The white unicorn came alongside and stared at discovery. "No Amber I haven't. But that's not surprising. Almost none of the Stables ever had direct communication between them, and StableTech was rather cagey about how many Stables they constructing at the time."

           Unable to glean more information they pressed on. As they did the crisscrossing roots grew more frequent, and on several occasions Sweetie swore she felt one twitch or squirm when she stepped on them. Amber thought that this was caused by the thick layer of spongy, organic detritus that blanketed the floor.

           As they progressed deeper and deeper into the Stable they started to notice a certain plant-based emphasis to facilities here. Seed vaults, indoor greenhouses, hydroponic gardens and laboratories devoted to botany in far greater numbers than were required to sustain the Stable's population. Which as they progressed deeper both ponies started to realize something was missing from this vault. Something they'd encountered in every abandoned vault they'd explored.

        Neither of them had seen any dead bodies or skeletal remains. Not even the usual carcasses of wild denizens that normally took up residence in forgotten Stables.

        It was in the rotting remains of laboratory desk that they found their first piece documentation related to the Stable. A soaked, mold covered lab log. Most of it was completely illegible but at the very back of it was one barely readable entry.

       It was suppose to a beautiful union. A marriage that would make Equestria flourish again one day! Ponies and plants working together to once again bring life and vibrancy to the land. But now it's become a nightmare. Where did we go wrong?

       Not sure what to make of this they pocketed the journal and pressed. A short time later Sweetie noticed that there was a slowly increasing source of light ahead. Also she was positive that a couple of times she felt roots squirm under her hooves as they advanced.

      Eventually the hallway Sweetie and Amber were in terminated a large circular atrium area. The source of the light came the fact that a large part of the ceiling in the Stable and the bedrock above it had been torn away to permitted dim light from the outside world to filter down. A dense canopy of the trees at the surface obscured most sunlight from reached this room, but compared pitch black hallways the two ponies had been in it was welcome sight.

      What occupied the center of the atrium was less welcoming.

       Perched upon a mound of earth and organic material was a massive bulb shaped plant. It appeared to have long tongue leaves/petals that were tightly drawn up. Emerging from the giant plant was mass of roots that snaked out in all directions. The circular room had an oddly heavy and unevenly bumpy texture to it. Only the sound of dripping water broke the silence. After second Sweetie spoke.

       "Okay. Giant plants that aren't trees are creepy."

       Both ponies stayed together but far away from the ominous vegetation as they looked around the room. Sweetie was peering around the room when something caught her attention. Moving her glow globe over closer to circular wall of the atrium she finally recognized what the texture of the wall was.

        It was pony skulls. Hundreds of skulls all facing inward toward the plant. Held tight to the wall by dense network of vines, tendrils, and roots. Only with great effort did she resist screaming.

        "Amber! I know what happened to the ponies of the Stable!" She hissed.

        The stallion turned to see what the mare was looking at when he stepped firmly on one of the roots when he did several things happened at once.

        First he felt the root violently twitch under his hoof. Second a long, moaning sigh came from the giant plant. Third the same plant began open its petals revealing squat, stump-like center.

        "Okay! Giant plant that move are even creepier!" Sweetie exclaimed as she drew her machine pistol.

        The two ponies were beginning to back out of the room when suddenly the center of the plant opened revealing a great vertical maw lined with thorn-like teeth. From this maw erupted mass of long tendrils that whipped out and wrapped around the ponies. Sweetie was physically yanked into the air and Amber found himself dragged toward the plant.

       "Aaaaahhhh!!!" Sweetie screamed. "I've seen some of those creepy pre-war EC comics and I know what happens next!" So she began firing burst into the plant.

       Trying to keep from being throttled by the plant Amber began firing one-handed into the plant at point blank range.

       With her one free hand Sweetie pulled a hand grenade from her belt, and then using her levitation she yanked the pin from it. Then she pitched it into the plant's waiting maw. For several seconds nothing further happened. Then there was a muffled THUMP and the plant suddenly bulged out like water balloon. This was followed by a geyser of green and red ichor that erupted from the mouth drenching Sweetie and spraying all over Amber. Then like some deactivated air dancers the tendrils went limp and Sweetie flopped to the ground. For several seconds the mare just looked down at herself before speaking.

     "I. I. I will never be able to eat guacamole in the Stable cafeteria again!"

     This was a Patreon reward for Skyline. The firearms in the picture are the Russian Stechkin APS Link, Link and the French MAT-49 Link.

Of course Sweetie was referring to those horrible Equestria Comic books from the prewar period.

[how-to-t-u-m-b-l-r]

Chapter 3. Merry… *checks notes* Ides… of.. March?

A beginner’s guide to Tumblr holidays

These just happen sometimes:

DAY 15 GIVE IT UP FOR DAY 15

Thursday the 20th

The Fifth of Wednesday

Sometime in June: That One Halloween Post Starts Circulating

Sometime in July: Dancing Pumpkin Man Video/Gif

Every week these happen:

Every Monday: El Muchacho Monday

Every Tuesday: Tuesday Again? No Problem...

Every Wednesday: Wet Beast Wednesday

Every Thursday: Out of Touch Thursday

Every Friday: Flat Fuck Friday

Every Saturday: Don't @ Me, I'm Chilling/Caturday

Every Sunday: Fingers In His Ass Sunday

Every year these are holidays:

January 16: Appreciate a Dragon Day

January 29: Threshold Day

All of February: Funguary

February 14: Aromantic/Asexual Day

March 9: Miku Day

March 10: Mario Day

March 14: Pi Day

March 15: Ides of March

March 23: Ever Given Got Stuck Today

April 1: Mishapocalypse

April 2: Dashcon Announcement Anniversary

April 3: Dannypocalypse

April 8: Rex Manning Day

ALSO April 8: MARGARET THATCHER IS DEAD

April 13: Neil Banging Out The Tunes

ALSO April 13: Homestuck Day

April 20: haha 420 blaze it

April 25: The Perfect Date

April 28: Ed Balls Day

April 30: It's Gonna Be May

All of May: Mermay

May 3: Beginning of Dracula Daily

May 4: May the 4th Be With You

May 5: Revenge of the Fifth

May 25: The Glorious 25th of May

All of June: Pride Month

ALSO All of June: IT'S HALLOWEEN TIME TO GET SPOOKY

June 5: Barricade Day

June 16: Let Papyrus Say Fuck

July 20: Moon Landing

September 8: The Queen Is Dead and Sans Undertale Killed Her

September 21: DO YOU REMEMBER-

All of October: SKELETON WAR

ALSO All of October: Inktober

October 3: Mean Girls Day

ALSO October 3: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood Day

October 20: Unnecessary Feelings Day

October 31: HALLOWEEN

November 5: honestly what didn't happen that day

November 19: Goncharov

All of December: Will the Gävle Goat Get Destroyed Again?

December 10: Please, It's Christmas

December 24: ALMOST CHRISTMAS MEANS IT WASN'T CHRISTMAS

More advice here!

[laguezze]

PAC: Characteristics of your FS

This is for or all the people with intention to marry or have a long term relationship. Next up will be a soulmate characteristic PAC. I decided to split it in two to get more details!

Now onto the PAC!

Here are the piles!

Pile 1

Pile 2

Pile 3

Pile 4

Ready? Let's go!

Pile 1

This person is a rebel. Might be a bit hypocritical about it. Like they might come from money but decide to live out their best broke musician dreams while still living in their rich dad's apartment that he bought for them. That's just one case example, take it as it resonates.

This person loves to keep appearances, they love to be in control of how people perceive them. I'm seeing they want to be taken seriously.

Long, messy, brown, curly hair. Middle part is possible.

North America, Australia, Oceania, Hawaii, UK.

Dainty eyes?, Blue eyes, light eyes.

Not too defined features but also not ugly. Might be what people call "medium ugly" for some of you. Nothing too shocking about their features.

Musician, plays guitar, indie music taste, 420 friendly? Nirvana (the band), big social life, plaid shirts, leather jackets, bad boy persona, baddie aesthetic, motorbike, cigarette, old school lover, 70s aesthetic and fashion.

Pile 2

This person is very much hypocritical, they don't know what they want in life. Very much lost with their career and family life. You might help guide them.

They definitely have unconventional dreams like opening up a tea shop, or flower shop. Which is fine, but I'm seeing they want to do that for the wrong reasons. Very easily manipulated person, it'll be frustrating for you to see. But they'll get better with your help probably.

Probably from any capitalist country. Take that as you will.

Light eyes or medium eyes but not dark. Downturned eyes.

Short hair, pixie cut, wolf cut.

Wears bandanas, baggy clothes, long skirts, hippie style, boho aesthetic, activist. Necklaces and bracelets, lots of jewelery in general.

(sorry it's a bit short, your person wasn't too specific with the looks but rather with the personality)

Pile 3

You guys got yourselves a romantic, old school, kinda person. They probably listen to music from the 50s and 60s and jazz, lots of jazz. Might love to take things slow and smooth. Doesn't like running late to things and is always calm and early. Very collected person, never a hair out of place. Always is composed. They might have been different before they met you. They probably were chaotic and funny before they met you but something happened that made them this sophisticated, chic person. You might need to bring the fun in them back, I'm hearing. Might be a judgy individual.

Latinx, Hispanic, Southern Europe, North America (East Coast)

Brown eyes, very deep set eyes, intense gaze

Short hair, very short for men, curly hair, either Brown or dirty blonde.

Long eyelashes, very pretty features. Either small nose or large nose, no in between; defined face, high cheekbones.

Medium height, slightly muscular.

60s, 50s music and fashion, coffee and tea lover, might be a cook or love to do it, kitchen lover, architecture fanatic, probably loves house decor and renovation, secretive, mysterious, romantic, candle collector.

Pile 4

(idk i swear this is not Hozier themed, there's just something about him present here)

"imagine being loved by me"

This persoooon omg. So pure hearted. Truly has the best intentions at heart. They literally are sunshine personified. They radiate light, like their smile lights up a room and they always look clean and cheerful. The type of person everyone likes. No one ever dares say anything negative about them and if they do, it's because of jealousy.

They might have a lot of pretty privilege that makes this effect happen. Like if this person was a 6/10 (conventional attractiveness scale) their personality wouldn't be as appreciated. But because they're so beautiful inside and out, it shines through. I'm getting they realize this privilege and it rubs them the wrong way sometimes but they won't fight against it because it's helping them with their goals.

North America, Sweden, Finland, etc, Northern Europe and UK.

Blonde hair, short hair, curly hair, honey hair.

blue eyes, light eyes, almond shaped eyes

Bunny pretty (that one TikTok trend ifykyk), slim, short, cherubin look (if you don't know what that is, think cupid angel type of beauty), white clothes, flowy dresses, short eyelashes, defined jawline, big smile, straight teeth, bunny teeth, cardigans.

Hope it resonates for all of you!!! 💕

[cressthebest]

Crimsons Rivers thoughts pt. 36

chapter 55:

1. kingsley is mad at lily and i GET IT i understand. but all those people are adults and CHOSE to go on the mission. it is not solely her fault

2. NOOOO!! sybil is so dear to me!! and kingsley broke up with her!!! no!!!!

3. god, i feel so bad for euphemia and fleamont. yeah victors were saved. but their children, their two children, were the only ones not brought back home. i don’t know how i would recover

4. “there was Narcissa, who wasn't just in the hunger games; no, she played the game, and she played it well, so well that Euphemia never doubted she would win.” yo that’s fucking terrifying. i-

5. andy and narcissa reuniting has me crying so hard. their sisterhood is so important to me

6. regulus doesn’t have sirius, so all he wants is james to comfort him. i- i can’t do this

7. “It's like this, that he turns to her, and Euphemia knows immediately, just that simply, that Sirius isn't here.

He isn't, because if he was, that's who Regulus would cling to; that's the only person he ever wanted to cling to.”

okay, um, simply stabbing my heart would have been easier

8. “They all knew only one could make it out, and Sirius wasn't going to be the one who did, except more than one has, and Sirius is the only one who didn't.” 😧😧😧

9. god i love dorcas. she is not lying to anyone they saved by saying there will be comforts, but she is saying they will be safe and everyone there will be kind. i love her so much

10. dorcas caring for marlene first >>>>>>>>>

11. LILY AND REMUS REUNITED!!!! OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! THEYRE REUNITED!!!!

12. oh shit. wait. that was too soon. before the lily and remus reunion, he hears her say that the absolute love of his life is probably dead

13. remus’ breakdown has me in shock. like i’m not even in tears anymore, i’m just shocked. i- this hurts too bad to even cry

14. “Lily does not know much, she doesn't know what Sirius was to Remus, but she does know for sure now that he was something.

Maybe, as much as she dreads to think it, he was everything.”

😀😀😀 you can’t write lines like that. that feels illegal, to mess with my emotions like that

15. i want someone to care for me the way dorcas cares for marlene. she starts a war early to save her life. she’s willing to kill anyone to keep her alive. she will do anything.

16. “"Perhaps if you had considered the impact of the lives you planned to shape into martyrs, you would have realized that this could happen, and would be no one's fault but your own. You put those people in the arena this year, Albus, didn't you tell me that? All the ready opposition to Riddle, and you couldn't foresee this? Opposition to you?"”

get his ass alberforth. 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

17. “In all his years, Aberforth has never seen a loyalty and love exist as the loyalty and love between those two boys do.”

this is so sweet if it weren’t for the context of the statement

18. 😀😀😀 wow i hate albus

19. “They are at their best together when they are showing their worst to one another and basking in the relief of being next to someone they know won't really care, or have an opinion on it, or judge them.”

regulus and remus’ friendship >>>>>>>

20. as reg is literally beating lily up he’s like “i love her! she’s amazing! she’s my savior!! 😊😊 that’s why i must try to kill her!!!

21. “It was supposed to be me and you, but Sirius is gone. Come back to me, baby, Regulus thinks, but James is gone.” 😀😀 what a fantastic start to my day

22. lily should have had a gun in canon. this au only further proves that to me. the war would be so short is lily evans was given a gun and told to just go off and do what she wanted with it.

23. zar gave marylily hints in the authors notes ??? 👀👀 marylily??? 👀👀 marylily endgame?? 👀👀🌸🍓🎉

24. authors notes: “lily lily lily my beloved <3 she really was about to blow albus' skull open, soooo sexy of her 🥰” AGREED

25. also there’s 420 comments on that chapter and i don’t want to fuck with that number.

[setsuuestsu]

Sicktember Day #2

Alt. 4: Flushed Cheeks

Sickie: Hoseok | Caretaker: Yoongi

Word Count: 420

When Yoongi had entered the younger’s room that morning, he half-expected himself to be met with an armful of an excited Hoseok, but instead it was quiet, the only sound being the low hum of the ceiling fan.

“Seok-ah? Are you awake?” he softly called. 

The lump under the covers of the bed didn’t move, so Yoongi assumed that Hoseok was sleeping in. 

But still, it was already 11AM, and it was unlike Hoseok to ever sleep this long unless he had a late schedule the night before, which he hadn’t, as the dancer had returned around 4PM the previous day. 

“Seok,” he calls one last time. “It’s time to get up. Uhhhh something about the birds calling and shit?”

The only response he gets is a soft groan. 

He sighs and moves closer to the Hoseok-shaped lump still under the covers. “Sunshine, it’s like you and I switched personalities or something.”

Then he adds, “I don’t think the others will be able to deal, so lets not let them see, yeah?”

“Go ‘way …” is the reply he gets from the younger. “I’m sleeping …”

Yoongi snorts. “You’ve slept for fourteen hours. I don’t know how you’d still be tired. Even I’m not even tired after how long it’s been.”

No response.

The elder rapper sighs, frustrated at this point. It’s like Hoseok doesn’t even want to listen to him. Granted, he tunes out half of what Jin or the others say sometimes. 

Having had enough, Yoongi yanks the covers off of Hoseok. 

It’s then that he gets a good look at the younger. He’s all messy dark waves and adorably bleary-eyed. But then, Yoongi notices how flushed Hoseok’s cheeks are. He frowns, pressing the back of his hand to Hoseok’s cheek, then switching to the other side of the younger’s face.

“Hey,” Yoongi starts, treading the conversation carefully. He doesn’t want Hoseok to get defensive. “Are you feeling alright?”

“I’m fine …” Hoseok mumbles, wrapping himself in his covers once more. Yoongi notices the slight tremble to his form. 

“Seok-ah …” Yoongi warns.

Hoseok deflates. “No. I feel really sick …”

Yoongi leans forward and wraps Hoseok in his arms. “That’s all you had to say. Lay down with hyung, yeah?”

Thankfully, since the younger is so sick, he complies almost immediately, making Yoongi’s job a hell of a lot easier. 

He kisses Hoseok’s forehead and the tip of his nose and each of his flushed cheeks and by then, the younger has his eyes closed once more. 

[brightlotusmoon]

The most credible story traces 4/20 to Marin County, Calif. In 1971, five students at San Rafael High School would meet at 4:20 p.m. by the campus’ statue of chemist Louis Pasteur to partake. They chose that specific time because extracurricular activities had usually ended by then. This group — Steve Capper, Dave Reddix, Jeffrey Noel, Larry Schwartz, and Mark Gravich — became known as the “Waldos” because they met at a wall. They would say “420” to each other as code for marijuana.

As Reddix told TIME in 2017, “We got tired of the Friday-night football scene with all of the jocks. We were the guys sitting under the stands smoking a doobie, wondering what we were doing there.”

The shenanigans continued long after 4:20 p.m., too. The group challenged each other to find ever-more-interesting things to do under the influence, calling their adventures “safaris.”

Later, Reddix’s brother helped him get work with Grateful Dead bassist Phil Lesh as a roadie, so the band is said to have helped popularize the term “420.” On Dec. 28, 1990, a group of Deadheads in Oakland handed out flyers that invited people to smoke “420” on April 20 at 4:20 p.m. One ended up with Steve Bloom, a former reporter for High Times magazine, an authority on cannabis culture. The magazine printed the flyer in 1991 and continued to reference the number. Soon, it became known worldwide as code for marijuana. In 1998, the outlet acknowledged that the “Waldos” were the “inventors” of 420.

Bloom, now the publisher of Celebstoner.com, has credited the people who wrote the flyer for the date’s reputation as an annual gathering of pot smokers. “They wanted people all over the world to get together on one day each year and collectively smoke pot at the same time,” he wrote in 2015. “They birthed the idea of a stoner holiday, which April 20 has become.”

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Have the a-town writers ever been inspired to make any of the bs plots Rachel cites in her interviews (when asked about the show) canon?

[For those of you just tuning in: A-Town is the shitty postwar sitcom inspired by the life of Jake Berenson, to the eternal annoyance of Jake Berenson.]

Oh my god, like when Megamorphs 4 was inspired by a crappy AniTV episode to do the same premise better? I love this, not in the least because Rachel would find it infuriating.

Interviewer: So. A-Town. How do you feel about that cutie Trina?

Rachel: Oh yeah. That episode where she gave birth to a pterodactyl has always been a favorite of mine.

-- six weeks later --

Trina [bursting onto the set of the A family home]: Liam, oh Liam! I've had the most terrible morphing accident!

Liam [also in Brandon's house for some reason]: What is it, Trin? What happened?

Trina: M... morphing allergies!

Man in Pterodactyl Costume: [Enters]

Liam: Oh no!

Man in Pterodactyl Costume: EEeeeeeeEEEeeeEeeeek!

Liam: Oh NO! I'm not the father, am I?

Trina: Focus, Liam! What do we do? It's coming right at us!

Liam: I... I, uh... [calls upstairs] Daisy! There's a pterodactyl in the living room!

"Daisy" (Zeptron 420) [rushing down the stairs]: Andalite!

Man in Pterodactyl Costume: EEeeeeeeEEEeeeEeeeek!

"Daisy" [draws a knife]: ANDALITE! [runs at the pterodactyl]

[Zeptron 420 dive-tackles the pterodactyl; they fall off-set and out the As' front door. There are sounds of a scuffle, human and pterodactyl screeches, and then the sound of a human scream rising up into the sky as it gets further away.]

Liam [peering out the window]: Fiddlesticks! I didn't mean for it to carry her away! Oh well, one less controller to worry about.

Trina: My hero! [kisses him]

-- one week later--

"Daisy": [appears like nothing happened, showing no signs of having been killed/eaten recently, and never brings up the pterodactyl]

[frostythefrostedfox]

I don't even have a witty caption to make, y'all know this is true, stop coping, I've seen Fallout cutscenes with better animation than this show, putting same 8 characters in the same 4 locations for 23 episodes aint funny.

Boom wasn't trying to take itself seriously and that's why it was funny, but y'all doing the same shit that Boom made fun of and acting like Kojima directed the show, Idris Elba voiced Shadow and Nolan North voiced Sonic

Nine is as threathening as an Ipad kid at Walmart

Alexa Rose gave a minute long speech to a robot like it was able to understand anything.

I can already hear y'all yapping "m-muh mandates", "r-rushed production", "b-budget", how about y'all get a new argument for a change, I can watch Liar Liar every day of my life until I die and still crack my ass off laughing at it, but y'all aint Jim Carrey so get new material, please.

BTW, where is your lord and saviour Ian "Jesus" Flynn preaching his gospel? Because last I heard this man wasn't shutting his trap about how "Prime is 420% canon my dude, how? I can't tell you lol xd because it would be a spoiler, but trust me bro, I know shit... How do I know? Because I made it up like everything I say!", y'all been real quiet ever since the middest of the mid, the ultimate corporate gobslop, dropped

Sonic X wasn't the peak of the peakest-est peak-er either, but damn, it was enjoyable and consistent with itself, at least have some self awareness.

I'm glad I only saw like 2 episodes of this thing before watching S3, and guess what, I didn't needed to watch the whole thing because the exposition dump in this show makes backwatching unnecesary.

And don't think I am going to agree with the other side either, people acting like that bunch of mismatched sprites in one of the introductions killed your grandma or something, dude chill out, is a cartoon blue hedgeheg, yeah it was cringe as fuck but y'all acting like Sonic just said something like "Team Magma did nothing wrong, N was right", you can criticize something without acting like its the end of the world, stop overrreacting, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but by doing this, you aint making Sonic want to come to your birthday party.

Stop pretending this show is Edgerunners 2

Stop pretending this show is The Room 2

[haxorus612]

actually i can't stop thinking about it. amiya bossfight meta time.

amiya as a fighter is not particularly exemplary in any regard. she doesn't defeat any notable opponents, she doesn't have particularly powerful arts, even her own unique arts aren't especially suited to battle so why do i want to fight her? easy: she knows you, same reason i want to fight kal'tsit. kal'tsit would also be a terrifying boss fight, but she constitutes a massive physical threat, whereas amiya would need to get craftier.

amiya would be a boss with relatively low stats, and few defensive abilities. instead she would make up for it by reacting to the player's actions. deploy a specialist? she massively increases your operator's redeployment timers. deploy a defender? their maximum hp decreases. deploy a sniper? she turns herself and all enemies invisible. defeat her with arts? her resistance/arts dodge increases. her personal arts is empathy reading, she can't 100% read your mind, she can't prepare *perfect* counters, but she sure can get those surface thoughts and get a leg up over your strategy

i also figure that despite her low stats, she'd be a long, grueling fight. you'd take down her first health bar, and she'd just get another one, like 5-6 times in a row. more like an elite enemy that won't stay dead. her high true damage attacks especially would turn it into a grinding battle of attrition. amiya isn't super strong, but she's persistent, both in battle and in life. when she encounters an obstacle it's time to think of a new solution, not give up which is why, just like the endspeaker, each phase would give her a new, stronger buff, and her debuffs would get harder and harder to deal with. if i got my way it'd be like: if you deploy a specialist in her 1st phase, it increases redeployment times by like, 70%, pretty bad but you can work around it. in her 6th phase though? it'd be like, 420%. that operator is gone for the rest of the operation. 90% HP debuffs. 90% attack debuffs. -200 aspd. you basically have to soft-ban entire classes just to have a functional defense depending on how it happened, the various phase buffs could be themed around different sarkaz heroes throughout history, but i'd like it to never make her particularly superhuman. her weight is like, 4-5, so you can still shift or lift her. she still has a block count of 1, so even melantha can block her. instead it's just like phase 1: arts damage, melee range phase 2: arts damage, true damage skill, 1.2 tile range phase 3: arts damage, elemental damage skill, true damage skill, 1.5 tile range phase 4: dual hits arts damage, mass multi-hit arts damage like her s2, and all the previous skills. 2 tile range etc etc, nothing terribly crazy like "teleports 3 tiles and disables the attack of all operators in range and calls you mean names and steals your lunch money" i think it'd be cute if she didn't even turn invulnerable between phases, she just leaves and comes back later. like she's redeploying after using her s3.

obviously there's no way that they'd ever do something like this, but this is the first thing i'd do when making a fan game sdlkfjs also other ideas: she deploys operators from her squad. amiya is the boss, ofc, but you also have to fight dobermann and a lot of unnamed rhodes personnel. best case scenario: you're fighting the *entirety* of rhodes, and she deploys some real heavy-hitters like blaze and rosmontis against you. just pray logos, ascalon, and misery are out that day. kal'tsit would also be an entirely separate boss fight

still, it's one thing i really can't stop thinking about. theresa chose her as the king of sarkaz for a reason. what if it wasn't just out of desperation? what if she saw something rich, and powerful in her? i know it's selfish of me, but i want to see that from the other side. what do our enemies see in amiya?