#80k now tho

[its-stupidhours]

HOLY SHIT I ALMOST DIDN'T REALIZE

[catboybiologist]

Random actual vent that is probably more venty than my usual random little things, but occasionally I have to step back and think how asinine the salary system for PhD students can sound to people outside of academia. I really just want to like... lay it on the table, because it really is fucking dumb and I occasionally want validation that its fucking dumb.

Note that this is all coming from a traditional lab sciences, in the US perspective. Also, I'm really fucking ADHD and have a really, really shitty brain for bureacracy, so this is a rant and isn't really intended to be informative and might be wrong in places, its just me word vomiting.

Let's start with something straight off the bat- grad school isn't really school. It's work that creates value for the university, and you happen to take one or two courses on the side that the university has determined will make you better at that work (your mileage may vary). It's an entry level job, essentially. You create value for the university in one of two ways- you either contribute to research that gets them grant money, or you teach undergrads that pay tuition. We'll get back to how that affects you later, but first lets talk about something else: what the university claims they pay you vs what you actually get paid.

On paper, my income is approximately 3 times as much as my actual, take home income. There's two reasons for this. The first is that I am technically charged tuition by the central university, which is then immediately paid off by the source of my income. In official job titles, that's technically included in what you're getting paid, although most universities don't even bother advertising that. The other confounding factor is that you're literally always considered part time. The exact % time varies depending on your exact schedule, and of course your university, but its actually weirdly consistent even between universities. Technically, the work you do on your thesis isn't "work", and the university doesn't technically pay you to do it. Even though the work you do on your thesis literally generates revenue for the university in the form of grant overhead. But we'll get to that. If you're a researcher for a given appointment term, you're expected to also do research activities that are unconnected to your thesis- which is ridiculous, because there's no lab in existence where the work isn't all interconnected in some way.

Half time appointments are common, but lots of different percentages exist.

So, if you ever see a figure that says that a grad student position is paid at about $80k a year, that's whats going on. The highest take-home income I have EVER heard of in the US for PhD students is $54k, at Stanford neuroscience. I think its a bit higher now, but that at least gets you a ballpark. Most STEM PhD students on the high cost of living coasts are paid 30-40k ish, and in cheaper areas you can expect to take 5k off of that. These are for degrees that usually make six figures on the job market.

And then there's the other convoluted problem- the source of the funding. This is where the academia salary model really has a unique brand.

Basically, when you're a PhD student, you're not working one job for the full 5-7 years. You're constantly flipping between job titles within the university, and who exactly is paying you changes as a result.

The most basic distinction is researcher vs teaching assistant. TA is easy- you work "part time" (but oh my god those workloads are not part time sometimes [although the class I'm TAing now is very chill so its w/e][fuck you molecular genetics at my master's uni tho]), and the department you're teaching for pays for your tuition and your salary as a result.

Researcher is a bit weirder. Basically, each lab is conducted as its own independent financial unit, managed by a Principle Investigator (PI, or to any grad student, the professor/boss/research advisor/liege/monarch/authority of the lab). The PI is constantly writing lab wide grants to supply the core funding of the lab, including the salary of the grad students. Grants can be pretty general, but there are also very specific ones that check in how the money is being spent. These include training grants/fellowships/tbh the name is arbitrary for a lot of these. Those are grants that are written to supply the salary of a specific grad student.

Couple things to note- the university charges the PI in a lot of ways on this. Notably:

They charge tuition on every grad student, as mentioned previously, which under a researcher appointment is paid from the PI to the university.

They charge overhead on grants- basically, they take money out of every grant the PI gets.

If the previous two sources aren't enough, oftentimes universities will pay rent on the amount of building space a lab takes up (although this is very inconsistent between universities)

Researcher appointments are considered favorable to teaching appointments, because they mean you can spend more of your time on your thesis. But, its dependent on whether your PI has the funding to pay you all that, which is a big if. So, every quarter or semester or year or however much your university decides to renegotiate it, you essentially switch jobs, in a way. Obviously its a lot more simple and streamlined than actually switching jobs, but your title, responsibility, source of income, and sometimes your actual pay changes constantly.

And to anyone who has been through a PhD, you're nodding along like this is all the basic stuff, because all this is so NORMAL. Like this is all the normal system, and this is the bare basics of it as well. And it's weird that it's normal, right? Like, most of my career has been tied to academia, so I don't have a fantastic benchmark for this, but this isn't how it works outside of academia like... at all.

Over the course of late last year and bleeding into this year, multiple graduate student unions have had strikes or negotiations regarding pay scale, but its been a very difficult situation for the average grad student to untangle because of how weird the source of pay is. Because technically, even though you functionally work a single, salaried job with slightly changing obligations, what's happening behind the scenes is that you're essentially hopping between jobs every couple of months. In an ideal system, those jobs always have the same pay, but that's increasingly becoming not the case. Sometimes that means getting paid more overall, sometimes slightly less. Union negotiations have made this pay slightly higher overall, but its still a mess of a system.

And obviously, there's paperwork associated with so many of these steps.

So in my last post, when I said "getting a grant", that was what I was referring to- applying for training grants that will guarantee that I don't have to teach extra or get extra money from my PI for the time I'm here. I'd love to get more teaching experience, but ofc I want to do it when I want to, not when I have to. I'm applying for multiple training grants over the next couple of months that will hopefully fund my salary specifically, and hopefully I'll get at least one of them. And tbh, I don't even care that much about teaching, I more want them because it'll dramatically simplify all this for me.

I love what I do to death, but untangling this shit is what gives me imposter syndrome more than anything. I think my arrogant streak shows when I can genuinely say that I've never felt imposter syndrome based on my scientific knowledge. I have felt it over two things- my motivation/productivity (which is a different rant entirely), and the fact that I am really, really bad at untangling the level of bureaucracy required to just... exist here. Just give me my fucking paycheck and let me do my science, and tell me when you want me to teach.

[scribble-dee-vee]

Writeblr Intro circa 2024

Hi writeblr!! Sooo, I've been around here since about 2014. (Yes, I am ancient.) However, I've been dormant for the past 4-5 years. Blame college and a brief stint on Twitter. Now that I'm active again, I thought I should make an updated writeblr intro so ppl know my Deal. Basically, I want to engage with other folks who write fiction (esp original SF), and that's a little easier if I have a clear post that outlines what I do. Here to make connections and hear about your blorbos :)

About me

Hi, I'm Vee! They/them, 23, 💖 🤍 🧡

I do journalism/comms in western New York

My literary jam is feminist/adult SF and gothic lit (OG or modern) 🥀 ⚔️ 🌙

Enthusiastic about gay people, body horror, and sociopolitical allegories

I cook, run, play tabletop games, and occasionally draw. Other than that, I'm mostly writing (for work and for fun)

If you were on pre-2020 writeblr, you likely know me from my eight billion daily tag games. (I still like tag games and appreciate u for tagging me. I have also gained adult responsibilities and better mental health, so I respond very slowly now. <3)

Always happy to get asks or dms, tho as I've noted: I may reply slowly.

Sometimes open to beta read! I only read one longer project at a time, but it's always super fun :)

I tag very consistently – happy to tag triggers for followers/moots

Fun fact: I love mushroom hunting and worked as a mycology TA. #cottagecoreera 🍄 🧚‍♀️ 🌱

About my creative writing

I write,,,, feminist/adult SF with gothic leanings (surprise!)

Longform and short! Trying to do more short writing this year, and I'll likely share a bit on Tumblr. It's easier to clip a short story than a 150k novel, god bless.

The Aesthetic: moral g(r)ays, Victoriana, androids/cyborgs, Women™, monstrous femininity, incessant Hamlet/Frankenstein motifs, extremely boring socioeconomic worldbuilding, evil queens and/or dilfs, psychosexual witchcraft, probably a cat. Also, an ominous, plot-relevant letter laced with anthrax from your unhinged and brilliant ex-wife. Open if you dare.

Major projects

I'm going to be writing some short work this year, but these are the longer projects that I have going in the background. If I reblog blorbo-related text posts, they probably have something to do with these.

Let me know if you want to be added to any project-specific taglists 😎

Heart of Lead – Series

The big one

Perpetually evolving

Never ceasing

Pls send help I can't stop adding shit

5-book gothic fantasy epic that I'll definitely publish one day but probably no time soon! My bastard child, my wicked firstborn, my greatest love <3

Character-oriented political drama set in a pseudo-Victorian, dystopian oligarchy where everyone's heart is made out of metal. It's about coming of age and discovering queer identity in a world that is absolutely fucked. God is an extraterrestrial lesbian who gives ppl very traumatizing magic powers. There are cyborgs, shapeshifters, and morally gray women in STEM. It's tight as fuck idk what else what to tell u.

Book 1 is about achillean monarchists, and book 2 is about sapphic anarchists. There are only two genders, I guess.

At this point, I've drafted most of the books at least once. Working to refine a lot of raw material atm!

Tag: "heart of lead tag" or "hol tag"

Lost Letters – Book

Aka the current active HoL WIP, and book one in the revised series structure

Length: 80k as of now; around 120-140k when the first draft is finished, I presume.

Genre: adult fantasy, gothic, noir detective drama?? um?? If you want me to frame it in BookTok terms (why?) it's a dark academia villain x villain tragic romantasy. Hrgh.

Summary: Cyborg soldier goes to college, joins a shady socialite frat, and falls in love with the jilted heir-apparent to the throne. Hilarity ensues.

(By "hilarity," I mean a militant revolutionary faction and a tragedy of Greek proportions.)

POV characters: Charles (the cyborg), Dale (the heir), and Cecelia (Charles' sister, a junior detective, the love of my life and potentially the Chosen One???)

This book is twisty and dark and immensely fun to write.

I'm about halfway through the first full draft! Hoping to share snippets and vaguepost about my children here.

Tag: "lost letters tag" (also "hol tag," tho that one's less specific)

The Last of Mortal Tourists – Book

The next longform project on the docket!

Length: a standalone work that will hopefully fall on the shorter novel/novella spectrum.

Genre: literary SF, cyberqueer, psychological space quest

Summary: The consciousness of a dead coding genius, trapped inside a spaceship, seeks a new planet to sustain their sister, the last surviving human, after the destruction of Earth.

If you're here to get wildly philosophical about gender and the myth of essential self, this is the story for you! That's why I'm writing it, lol. 🏳️‍⚧️ 🚀 🤖

This one started out as a short story (100% finished) which I want to expand.

POV: Archer Alto, the coder. Spaceship? Human? Soul?

Supporting Cast: Pandora, the last human, and Abby, a holographic impression of Archer's childhood consciousness

Tag: "the last of mortal tourists tag" or "tlomt tag"

If you read all this way, you get a whole bouquet of flowers that are certainly NOT poisonous: 🌸 🌹 💐 🥀 🌺

<3

[kimio7]

Hey! Do you have any recommendations for multiple chapters Sewis fics that you liked? 🤗 Thanks!!

OFCC starting w an obligatory The Numbering at Bethlehem and transmotion recommendation, theyre both amazing and changed my life

rabbits are chasing by cloudsandpassingevents

Sewis at Le Mans!! ft nico to thicken the tension!! read it pretty recently but i love it sm <3

technically a oneshot but its also 30k+ so i hope it still works lol!

the heartbeat is a hunger by withfeathers

the soul bonding premise was done super well in this and the relationship evolves so naturally 39k, 4/4

Entanglement by Azzy

as per the tags, if you like romcom, youd probably like this! a very fun read tho it is incomplete for now 42k, 5/6

Lucky Thirteen by Azzy

one of my favourite kid fics literally ever like! wow its so cute and sweet it so enjoyable genuinely 80k, 10/10

Hard Year / Good Time / Socks Up / Foot Down by bestliars

one again technically a oneshot but one again its 50k!! amazing read the amnesia plotline is genuinely so well done and is something that is present throughout

I hope you like these anon!! (and i hope u havent already read these lol) I still to read more sewis and f1 fics in general but the ones ive recc'd are my favourite of what i currently have bookmarked

[azsazz]

I just need you to know how much I love MM 😭 Like my god its such a good slow burn and so well written!!! It reminds me so much of my time in college with all of my friends. There was so much juicy roommate drama and man do I miss hearing about it sometimes LOL Keep up the good work!! If you ever decide to publish the story for reals I would buy it up so fast 🩷

Also the newest chapter had me wanting to shove Az’s sperm donor in the nearest trash can. I love that we’re getting a better look into his life and his relationships. I cannot wait for the next one!

Ahhh thank you so much!!!

College was a good time mostly I miss it too 😭 mostly just miss my friends tho, now we all live in different states

I’m definitely planning on reworking to publish probably as soon as I finish the fanfic version, and it’s very thrilling and nerve wracking and it need to be perfect!! Been trying to save up for an editor lately but I already have ideas of what I want the cover to look like and it’s just been so much fun. I can’t believe it’s at 80k words right now that’s just so insane when I say it out loud lol. The end is near 😫

Yeah of course his family would come along and ruin even more!! Not fair to poor azzy who has already been through so much 😭😭😭

[atrial-ofhorror-if]

This is gonna be a long one yall, so feel free to skip and just send asks about my progress if you don't wanna read through it. Otherwise...

So, I didn’t really have much of an update for you all in February. Reason: it is my birthday month, and I was being a lazy little hedonist, teehee 🤎

In hindsight, February/March has also been one of the most rigorous months for my workplace as well. We have about 33 contracts that we have to get out to the organizations that we fund and unfortunately our legal department, our comptroller's office, and our commissioner has been H-Town stomping on our balls for the past 3 months.

Needless to say, ya girl is tired lol.

I am, of course, pushing through it because I promised this update a LONG time ago, and whenever I don't deliver I feel as if I age 20 years. I know technically I'm running myself ragged again but I can't bring myself to worry about it now. Especially, when I'm the reason why I'm working like a Yorkshire pig.

Clerical Update

Mostly just playing around in Twine, and answering asks. I wanted to do something for February cause it is the month of love, but I think I ended up getting overwhelmed with real life and other shit so that went to the gutter.

I think I'm gonna hire someone to make a special UI for me... I'm tired of fighting with twine, and I really just want to focus on writing, so if anyone has like recommendations for twine/tweego wizards or thinks that they can take a crack at it, let ya girl know.

I am paying.

Progress Update

So... Not a lot of progress was made in February month lol but again. The laz was real~

March was MUCH more progressive, (probably cause I ended up stressing myself out about getting the game out by Summer (June or July ???) Tentative of course 🥴🥴🥴)

Overall, i am at 80k+ words!

Progress for Routes

Search and Destroy: <1%

Interlude (TBA): 5%

To be well: Completed

Yes, you read that right... I have officially finished writing to be well and have transitioned into draft editing for that route🎉🎉

Writing the final part of that route has inflicted psychological and visceral damage to my soul 💀 I thought I would be ok honestly like I just knew I was gonna be able to keep chugging along, but it hurt a little more than I imagined.

I'm ok tho, and I promise y'all will be ok too! I think? So don't worry too much!

Now I plan on pushing this draft through editing at least 3 times. The first time will be solely for missing scenes, evaluation of scenes, and then re-working them. The second time will be more focused on the characters and how they feel in the game. I'm aiming to flesh them out, and add breath to their actions and words. So fingers crossed I'm successful 🤞🏿🤞🏿

The third and final draft will be solely grammatical. If I catch anything funky in there, I'll patch it up but the goal is that for the third draft the number of mistakes are gonna be few. Heh, like that will actually happen.

After this is done, I'll go ahead and plug it into twine, test out the codes, and then send it to beta testers.

I also want to talk about beta testing for a minute too, cause we are getting into that hour.

its gonna be SUPER important that I get a good portion of beta testers due to the variability of this update. (If y'all think this current update is bad just wait 🥴🥴) Like, I'm only one person, and unfortunately for me, there are only so many errors I can catch.

I'll be releasing a survey again for people to fill out if they are interested. It'll be open for a month, and then decisions made in the following two weeks.

Next Months and Remaining Month Plans

Edit, edit, edit!!

Finish the touches on the Interlude.

Technically the piece of that is going in the update is gonna be significantly smaller than what I intended. Which is ok, cause ya girl was gonna lose her mind 🥴🥴

Start Search and Destroy

I think that's it? Again if you have questions, please let me know! Love y'all 🤎🤎

[afaramir]

hiiii denethor anon here!! wow you’re really IN IT now (denethorposting). not to add more fuel to your anger but last week i saw someone say they hated denethor. and i just realised god they don’t get him even on tumblr do they. since then i’ve been silently fuming in rage. anyway… i am very Very Intrigued by both your faramir-goes-to-rivendell-au and denethor-thorongil relationship (if you ever want to write another 800 words about this, i am here for it 👀) and this line “each of them sharpens himself upon the whetstone of the other…” fuck. fucking insane actually.

unfortunately i won’t be replying for several days (i’ve had to keep my phone in another room to keep myself from getting distracted) . my exams have started AND i’m going through some shit irl :( it’s alright tho i’ll have more Faramir and Denethor Hours soon <- chanting this constantly haha. but i am with you when denethorposting IN SPIRIT okay. oh and can we please please please have denethor december? 🙏 bye will be here soon after my exams (that will be after the 23rd march i’m afraid)

hiii denethor anon <333 i am SO sorry this is so late truly attempting to figure out how to write AND see my friends AND do things like clean my apartment and go to the grocery store while working The Job...it has eaten my life. and this week my regular coffee shop switched their hours bc i live in my old college town and they are on spring break and it has sent me directly to hell. the death of My Routine…i have coped by INCESSANTLY denethorposting on tumblr dot com. i am somehow EVEN MORE in it than i was when you sent this ask. i hope you enjoy me being truly crazyinsane whenever you get a chance to look at all those posts lol. would love 2 hear your thoughts on them. but ANYWAY as always it is so lovely to see you, i'm sorry things have been tough but truly with my whole heart i bestow upon you the strength of denethor's sixty-year psychic war (with none of the associated madness) to make it through. looking at the date i hope you are free now.

here is the mandated readmore because i have never met brevity in my whole life. u said write another 800 words and i took that as a challenge um this post is like 2000 words. well...back on my bullshit

i mean this with all the love and joy in my heart but i laughed so much. no my dear friend they do not get him on tumblr. they have not gotten him on tumblr from the beginning. if you have been spared the incessant tomato jokes i truly…[crying] I Wish I Were You So Bad. this guy doesnt even know about the tumblr denethor slander (POSITIVE) (YEARNING). its the trenches out here for real. i just live in my little bubble with me and you and like four other mutuals/Denethor Understanders and that is it.

speaking of denethor and the rivendell au. i miss the days when i was working on the faramir-in-gondor scenes. emotionally it felt like dying but i kind of knew what was going on. now i am in rivendell taking and failing this history of middle earth exam. and i am so very….the next time we see denethor for real is in return of the king. now girl…how will i survive another 80k words. i miss my boy my dear darling my tortured victim of the narrative. and according to the paragraph i just wrote faramir does too but is Refusing to admit it to himself<3

im also RIDICULOUSLY torn on how i want to resolve his arc. now just between you and me. and anyone who bothers to click that read more. I DONT WANT TO KILL HIM I WANT HIM TO LIVE. GOD I WANT HIM TO LIVE. I WILL WRITE YOU A THOUSAND HAPPY ENDINGS. except its not a happy ending its a you are not allowed to die you are forced to contend with your choices you must keep living ending. because he will always be tragic no matter what. but its ALSO a you can rest now you can be at peace son of gondor you have won your war. all you sacrificed has been worth it. you have given your all when that's what duty asked you for and it has been enough. and that makes my poor heart weep.

like on one hand the idea of resolving his storyline with faramir.......the opportunity for some kind of reconciliation, some kind of understanding between them...god. delicious. i know in my heart that faramir comes home and IS the lord that denethor once dreamed of being. not playing at it...he is high and lordly and gentle and the world bends around his will and he knows exactly what to bow to and when to stand his ground and his powers are honed to a keen edge that he uses with the utmost care and. AUGH. he walks into the citadel the IMAGE of his father. it makes me feel FERAL. and how would denethor react to that. man.

BUT ON THE OTHER HAND HOW DO I END THE STORY. like. LOL. do u know what i mean. likelihood of me being able to just have a triumphant coronation and tie it all up with a bow is soooo small. the narrative contortions i would have to go through. to have denethor accept that and still be in character. Girl....no thank u <3 so we havent worked THAT out yet. like how much of the madness and despair do i want to put into the narrative. We Shall See. IM not politically savvy enough to get real into the weeds with it all so im kind of rotating just. a beautiful set of reunions with the fellowship. eowyn and faramir get engaged. boromir and faramir see all their dreams of a gondor restored come true. we skate over the political minefield and deeply navigate the beginnings of denethor and faramir's relationship in this new world. and among it all, within it all, is hope, and a new dawn. and curtain.

i got distracted but re: we are in rivendell. it IS kind of fun to think about the themes and narratives. i am pushing my Let Faramir (And Denethor) Be Numenorean + Let Numenoreans Be Weird agendas so so sooo hard and i am having the time of my life with that specifically. birds follow him around and pick up the tunes he sings. he hears the voices of the people he loves in his head. he falls into a river and after having a breakdown about it promptly decides that The River Is Testing Him And He Has Passed. he gets to rivendell and INSTANTLY knows that there is someone Very Like Him Here (its elrond. the elrond-elros-faramir connection has me FROTHING at the mouth. faramir looks at elrond and sees his father and sees every statue of elros in minas tirith and Knows that this here is the son of earendil, gil-estel, his brightest north star. elrond looks at faramir and sees his brother, his dear dead doomed brother, and every numenorean descended from him and all their sins and all their glories and yet, kind as summer, sees beauty and knowledge and a strange quiet man who carries all the weight of his country on his shoulders and yet knows him, knows the legends; perhaps the blood of numenor is not yet spent in the south)

i just think that Every Elf that meets faramir along the way is like woah...hold up. there's something up with THIS guy! men ARENT supposed to do that! not anymore anyway! galadriel is Lowkey Threatened by him. and isnt that beautiful. woman who could be queen of the earth sees god's special chosen boy and goes hang on a minute. Fuck. i think they work out their shit by the time the company leaves lothlorien but like...just thinking about how faramir lowkey blamed her for boromir's death in rotk! idk how their dynamic is exaclty gonna manifest but there's definitely some sort of similar mindreader2mindreader tension!

AND. um the idea of faramir travelling with the fellowship discovering that maybe...well. he has never wanted to be a warrior but he has been honed into a blade anyway. by his father and by necessity. and perhaps for the first time in his life...outside of gondor he does not need to be all that. he can be mithrandir's pupil without censure he can be scholarly and witty and cunning - he is all these things, in gondor. but there he has to be them, and now he can discover that yes, this is what he wants to be. and he has never let his father and the expectations of his position STOP him but there is always a weight, there is always the knowledge that your actions are disapproved of, and being away from that for a while is i just think. really good for him. see above re: he comes home the image of his father in a gentler time. keep honking im sitting in my car crying about denethor ii twenty sixth steward of gondor.jpg (<- my greatest creation PLEASE click the link lol)

ALSO IM THRILLED YOU LIKED THAT WHETSTONE LINE LOL i kind of blacked out when i typed it on the page. i think truly the crazy thing about denethor and faramir is that they SHOULD understand each other. they know so much about each other and yet are so incompetent at actually putting it to any good use towards, you know, improving their relationship. faramir is incredibly emotionally intelligent AND can read minds AND has taken so many of what he probably views as denethor's worst traits and turned them to gentler uses. (im talking about his powers but im ALSO talking about that thing he does when he encounters frodo and sam where he plays woe is me my brother is dead and i miss him sooo much to get on their good sides. yes of course he misses boromir more than anything else in the world. no he is not above using it to his advantage. and we see the SAME THING when gandalf and pippin come to minas tirith. hey isn't it crazy that both of them use boromir as a. manipulation chip. even after he's dead. hey thats kind of fucked up actually!) and denethor is…well denethor is denethor. ok im mostly messing around and thought that sentence was funny. i think he Knows most everything that goes on in faramir's head and yet Wilfully Chooses to interpret it in the worst ways because its just soo....very I Thought I Raised You Better Than That/I Honed You To Be My Blade Stop Defying Me. and despite all that the Problem is that they understand each other right up until they don't. they know how THEY feel about each other (incredible love that they can only express in the worst ways/think they're expressing only to be spurned by the other) but cannot POSSIBLY imagine that the other feels the same way.

ive gone on for SO SO LONG ALREADY LOL but. what do i have to say about denethor and thorongil. not enough and too much all at once. they're so toxic and awful for each other they're MADE for each other they're beautiful narrative parallels they're homoerotic besties they're bitter rivals they're pawns in a proxy war they're locked at all times in a psychic psychosexual situationship. um the enemy of my enemy is kissing me with tongue. idk i have more symbolism and actual analysis especially of the denethor-ecthelion-thorongil Issue. but we are just getting into it. so i will start with the situations bc i have two angles for this. on one hand i do think it is very fun if they constantly homoerotically circle each other for years and years and never do a THING about it. like...this is a stitching up wounds wiping blood off each others faces battle couple/situationship situation that THEN turns into a ridiculously high functioning political rival partnership bent together over books long into the night catching each others eye in council meetings using their very real disdain for each other for Manipulation Purposes and getting uh. SO hot over it. like.....Do You Know What I Mean. just. truly unresolved sexual tension THROUGH THE ROOF. it DELIGHTS me. they are always putting themselves in situations. and then NOT making out about it. AND THEY CAN READ EACH OTHERS MINDS!! THE WHOLE TIME!! SO THEY KNOW EXACTLY HOW MUCH THEY WANT EACH OTHER AND STILL ARENT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT IT!!! like thats just really good. but on the other hand.......the idea of just an absolutely terrible beautiful toxic rivals with benefits codependent situationship. i hate you so much and you know what we DO need to make out about it. every time they fuck it is a power play and they are having SO much fun with it. they will both start arguments with each other (AND IN PUBLIC TOO) just so they can fight and make up. the mind reading...Oh You Know What I Mean. taylor swift voice we had this big white city all to ourselves we blocked the noise with the sound of i need you and for the first time i had something to lose! logically thorongil is not yet in his grubby ranger era but the idea of him being dirt smeared all the time and hanging out with prim proper polished denethor. in the fic (which does exist and DOES follow the second model) theres a scene where hes just chilling with his head in denethor's lap and denethor is actually rather delighted and devoting ALL of his copious braincells to pretending not to be. Man. well never say im not a slut for contrast. and now the rest of what i could say is simply straight up redacted for indecency so it is time for this post to be over. the last thing i have to say is that it absolutely ruins denethor's life forever when thorongil up and leaves. sometimes a situationship....anyway. MUCH LOVE TO YOU AS ALWAYS yes we will have denethor december i already have an url saved.

[babydarkstar]

You write? :3

yes i do 😳 above everything else i consider myself a writer. it’s a fundamental part of me—words are what i’m good at, and like an illustrator can create wonderful worlds with lines and color, i strive to do the same with words.

i can remember before i even learned to read i was 4 years old and had stories i wanted to tell. i was 12-14 and i blackened journals with poetry and prose, things i would look back on now and think ‘omg cringe’ but in the moment that was my flow and i’ll never judge myself for that. any sort of creative writing project in school was a guaranteed 100 for me, because i took on the assignment like it was my mission from god. when i was 14/15 my best friend was always the one i would send any original writing/stories to bc she would always hype me up and help me talk through my ideas. i owe a lot of my perseverance to her, because she gave me the encouragement i needed to keep pushing myself to get better and better. i have original characters and stories that i started/worked on when i was 14-18, as well as a lot of stream of consciousness poetry and a few other abstract ocs that i wrote when i was 18-20 and going thru crazy shit w friends and almost-never-quite-lovers. i started this blog when i was 16 and mainly used it as a fandom blog to write star wars fanfiction, and i wouldnt say i established any sort of foothold as a fan content creator, but i published a lot of stuff here and on ao3, ao3 who is my wife and my beloved angel forever and ever til (hopefully only my) death do us part. long live, amen. my inspiration to write ebbs and flows so i don’t push it when it isn’t working for me. for like a year i created content for pedro pascal’s cinematic universe of characters™ when i got super into the mandalorian, but then my interest for it faded. i also started doing drugs again which always hinders my writing and that’s actually a huge reason why i’m sober now, and a huge motivation to stay sober. then i somehow went through an mlp phase like an insane person, and im still working on a collaborative project for rarijack (bless) w an artist who i met via that fandom. the lesbian/sapphic/wlw content creators in mlp fandom on tumblr are actually epic tho they are few and far between. quite a few hidden gems, but v hidden bc there are so many creators and not everyone gets the attention they deserve. mlp didn’t spark my desire to create fan content/fic quite like the locked tomb tho, which is my current obsession and also permanently altered my brain chemistry like nothing i’ve ever read before and oh my god in like 3ish months ive literally written probably upwards of 80k words of a modern/college au that i’m still working the kinks out of. and it is. mostly smut because i saw these lesbians and i was like yall deserve to kiss and have narsty (meaningful) dyke sex and also hold each other for 17hours straight and not have to deal with so much shit. but then again i also am putting them through their own trials and tribulations in the au. so. yknow. some characters beg to be traumatized. it’s a character study, among other things. lmao. but yeah i havent posted anything for tlt yet bc one im just a little bit scared of the fandom on here and also ive set myself with this goal that i want to FINISH a story and publish it bc i always end up posting my stuff without finishing and when i read fic i like it to have a promise of an ending, so i also want to emulate that as a writer, even just on a personal level of wanting to say i’m capable of starting and finishing something meaningful like that. i also havent ever posted original work/poetry (maybe some poetry i cant remember) bc it’s. idk more near and dear to me than fanfiction, and i consider everything i write very near and dear, so i guard the og stuff w my life lmao.

damn. sorry for the life story but. it really is just a fundamental part of who i am. i’m in the process of becoming a kindergarten teacher and one thing i’ve always wanted to do was to learn how to create stories that are relevant for my students. i’ve also always wanted to create a children’s book; one of my lovely coworkers has a degree in studio art and she’s dreamt of being an illustrator for a children’s book, so i’ve been seriously considering doing that with her at some point in the future, once my life is more settled and i’m able to focus on it and give it the attention it needs <3 thanks for your curiosity hehehe

[midnightrings]

My AO3 Wrapped 2023

Because this was the year I got back into fanfic writing, I thought I might post a little wrapped for my fanfics :)

(If you see this and want to copy it for your own fics, feel free to. Doubt this is original in any way lmao)

Works published: 23 Total Word Count: 224k Total Hits: 21k Kudos: 806

-> Honestly love how much I’ve written this year (and there’s at least twice as much in my drafts). I didn’t write much since the pandemic started, because I just felt exhausted and there was zero inspiration. Writing fanfics had really helped me cope with all the stress and anxiety this year, so I’m glad I got back into it :D

Number of Fandoms: 6 Top Fandom: Bridgerton Top Pairing: Anthony/Siena Top Tag: Angst with a Happy Ending / Sex Work

-> Not surprising. I’m glad I decided to watch Bridgerton at the beginning of this year, because it’s definitely been my number one source of inspiration, especially Siena’s character - 100k words are basically just about her lmao

Also, the tags: the angst part is not surprising – I barely write anything without angst. Surprised by the sex work one tho haha (pretty sure that’s mostly Siena’s fault too)

Top 3 by Hits:

Paths to Happiness (Bridgerton - Kate/Anthony)

Meet Me At Midnight (Bridgerton - Kate/Anthony)

A Sweet Fantasy (Fellow Travelers - Hawk/Tim)

Top 3 by Kudos:

Paths to Happiness

Meet Me At Midnight

A Night of Peace (Bridgerton - Kate/Anthony)

-> Not surprising either. Kathony and Hawk/Tim are definitely the most popular and active fandoms I’ve written for this year, so those obviously got the most hits and kudos. Loved all of those works tho. Despite the partly negative experience, I still had a lot of fun writing Paths to Happiness and can’t wait to finish publishing it and working on the sequel.

My favorite is probably A Night of Peace though. I’ve written this earlier this year but kept it in my draft because it felt unfinished. But I’m glad I posted it – it’s short but sweet and I’m happy people liked it so much^^

Top 3 by Comments:

Paths to Happiness

Meet Me At Midnight / A Night of Peace

Promise (Fellow Travelers - Hawk/Tim)

-> Yeah, Paths to Happiness being number 1 is definitely not a positive lmao (tho it would’ve probably been number 1 without all the hate comments too). I do very much enjoy reading through all the comments though, despite the occasional negativity. It’s great to see how invested people are in the story. Can’t wait to read everyone’s thoughts once it’s finished^^

Top 3 by Bookmarks:

Paths to Happiness

A Sweet Fantasy

Meet Me At Midnight

Top 3 by Subscriptions (multi-chapter):

Paths to Happiness

The Hidden Way Ahead (Bridgerton)

A Dwindling, Mercurial High (Bridgerton - Anthony/Siena)

Top 3 by Words (completed works):

Shifting Tides (Ripper Street)

A Dwindling, Mercurial High

Clandestine Meetings (Bridgerton - Anthony/Siena)

-> Love that my longest works are the ones that got the least attention lmao (Paths to Happiness would be number 1 again, but I only wanted to include completed works for this)

But it’s actually a great thing, because I remember that when I was younger (in my teens), I often felt discouraged when people didn’t read my fanfics. So I focused on fanfics and fandoms that were more popular, but often didn’t finish the fics because it’s obviously not as much fun as writing about the things you really want to.

Now, I wrote almost 80k words for a series about Anthony/Siena that only a few people read, but it’s been my number one favorite work this year, and the one that I felt was the most successful personally. It just started out as a oneshot idea and turned into a 3 part series which I had an absolute blast writing.

So, at the end of this, special shoutout to my series Illicit Affairs – writing this meant a lot to me and this story will forever be dear to my heart <3

[hellolovers13]

Annual Writing Self-Evaluation 2022

Annual Writing Self-Evaluation 2022

Shamelessly stolen from @larrysballetslippers

1. Number of stories posted to AO3 this year: 10

2. Word count posted for the year: 83.245 (WTF??)

3. Fandoms I wrote for: One Direction

4. Pairings: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles/Niall Horan

5. Story with the most:

Kudos: I Hope We Never Change 

Bookmarks: I Hope We Never Change 

Comments: love drunk, waiting on a miracle 

More under the cut.

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): 

I Hope We Never Change was my first story and I've put a lot of heart into it. But I also have to mention my advent fic love drunk, waiting on a miracle. Writing 30k words in just three weeks is something I could never have seen myself do. It has been a challenge but I am soo glad I did it.

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why):

I Hope We Never Change Yeah I'm really proud of this one, but I also know I could've done soo much better. As is often the case with your first work, I think.

8. Share or describe a favourite review you received:

This one, because I love when a comment reflects what I wanted to portray. Makes me feel like I've done a good job. Same with this one. And I loved this one, too.

I also received some video reaction from my lovely beta @liberty-barnes which is just something else I love that soo much. <3

But honestly, I cry about almost every comment. I'm just soo grateful people enjoy my silly lil writing.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard:

Finishing Every Snowflake Is Different (Just Like You) was really hard. I struggled with fitting the pieces together a lot

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

No really a scene, but then again REALLY a scene XD, but writing Slow Hands really wasn't on by bucket list. It was, if nothing else, a great writing exercise and I'm happy people liked it even tho it had Narry in it XD. (also, if anyone sees this as a kinda sequel to I Hope We Never Change, I will not disagree, although I didn't write it like that it might very well be)

11. A favourite excerpt of your writing:

"All that will ever matter to me is you. My sexuality could never be more important. I haven't figured out what I am yet, but I know I’m yours. And I want you to always be mine. Whether that be my boyfriend, girlfriend, my partner.” (I Hope We Never Change)

12. How did you grow as a writer this year:

When I started again in June after almost ten years of not writing anything, I didn't think I would ever post anything. And now here I am, with 10 stories and over 80k words and I can't quite believe that even happened and that people would enjoy my writing at all.

13. How do you hope to grow next year:

There are a lot of areas I struggle with. Writing a scene with lots of people for example. I hope to get out of my comfort zone a bit next year.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

@liberty-barnes Miah, you already know this, but none of these stories would exist without you. Thank you soo much ily<3

@footy-met-mussy Tricia, you were my first real "fan" (lol) and I'm soo happy every time you comment on my fics or leave a tag or anything. ily

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

Definitely. Gender stuff is always very close to my heart, but I'm sure loads of my own insecurities blend into my stories as well

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

This will sounds like no advice at all, but just write. Doesn't matter if it's good, doesn't matter if it makes sense, doesn't matter if anything's missing. I have so many things marked as unfinished, so many half written sentences (mark those, otherwise your beta will be very confused XD sorry @liberty-barnes :*)

If I have a scene in my head I'll write it even if it's just a few sentences. I can always change it later if it doesn't quite fit anymore, but at least I have it written down.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: 

Yes, I have a pretty big project planned. Can't wait to start writing.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read.

@liberty-barnes @neondiamond @harryslonecurl @bananaheathen @wabadabadaba @lunarheslwt @itsnotreal @disgruntledkittenface @alwaysxlarrie @tommokat and anyone else who wants to

[staceymcgillicuddy]

6 and 7 for writer asks please!

Yaaay thank you, I am loving these questions!

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time?

I'm not a big fic re-reader, outside of a few staples that I've returned to approximately one billion times. I tend to read once, preserve the moment in crystal in my mind, and then try to find something else that gives me that same exact feeling, only to end up realizing that no, that fic was its own brand of special uniqueness.

Since I'm currently balls deep in writing Hellcheer, I haven't been reading a lot of it, but there are a lot of fics on my TBR list for once I wrap Soul.

(I am also, truly, the worst at bookmarking, so I find myself semi-regularly asking, "oh, God, what WAS that fic?!")

That said, there are a few fics from back in the day that I have saved on my Dropbox because they don't even exist online anymore. A lot of Destiel (I know, I know), some Mulder/Scully stuff, some LOTR stuff, and some early Marvel stuff.

7. How many ideas for fics do you have right now?

Outside of the WIPs I've already posted about, I have a vague idea for a Hellcheer fix-it fic, but I also feel like there are so many good fix-its, I wouldn't be adding anything new to the conversation. I've thought about a role reversal as well, but not sure exactly how I'd want to approach it.

I have like ~10 ideas for adult reunion fics, mostly expanding on some of the holiday/Valentine's Day one-shots I wrote.

Oh, and there's still a Robin fic in me somewhere, but I know canon will fuck with whatever I do so I look forward to finding out how the Duffers will kill off whatever girlfriend she gets so I can write a world in which that girl doesn't die.

I have also had a Jopper-era high school fic rattling around my brain for years, but I don't know how to do it without altering canon so Jonathan and Will don't exist, which I cannot do.

AND I have a Chrissy/Eddie/Steve fic percolating, which will probably get as far as the Steve/Jonathan/Nancy fic I tried writing a few years back. I just love a solid OT3, dammit.

(Maybe if I could do some of them as one-shots instead of wanting to write 80k about them, life would be easier. Couldn't be me, tho.)

Fic Asks, Baybee

[udunie]

no pressure but I'd love to hear about these oppressive omegaverse dystopia ideas if you wanted to share!

+

well dont leave us in suspense. whats the new oppressive a/b/o universe now

I was thinking of an A/B/O universe where there's a prolonged conflict (either with another country or aliens or something), plus there are demographic challenges (that the 'developed world' will eventually face everywhere) which is not a good combo, cause war feeds on human flesh.

There would be a large Population Optimization Program (POP), under this the following legislation would be put forward:

Abortion ban

Contraceptive ban

Α PAPA (alpha paternal payments - large tax credits based on offspring number in or out of mating bonds - or heck, maybe also some cash bonuses?)

Ω MAMA (Omega Mandatory Mating - a huge step back for omega rights, all omegas who are not mated by age 21 would be paired up with alphas, plus any widowed omegas would also be mated again if they are still fertile)

Ω DOLL program (Omega Debt Optimization and Loan Leniency) that makes it possible for families with a lot of debt to get all of it forgiven in exchange for giving up an unmated omega child to the state who would then go to State R&R centers (meaning Recreation and Reproduction here) where omegas who are dependents of the state 'work'

(can you tell how much I love all those acronyms and shit the US uses, lol)

Omegas are accepted in R&R centers from age 14 and up, here they are intensely bred and worked as prostitutes - referred to as Private Entertainment Technicians in polite society - aka PETs (mainly aiming services at the military and law enforcement).

The breeding program starts with health screening and an artificially induced heat that guarantees pregnancy within a day or two. Omegas are pregnant for 8 months (thanks to medical advancements, this doesn't pose much of a risk, and a lot of times they are carrying multiples that usually can't be carried to term anyway) During pregnancy they are working as PETs, they can be rented for 200/hour, tho military/law enforcement get a 50% discount, and they make up almost all customers. They are working at most 10 hours a day.

After the 8 months is up, labor is induced. After birth, there's one month of breastfeeding and recovery, then the babies are separated and placed into nurseries. The next month is continued recovery and fertility treatments that significantly raise the chance of conceiving multiples, to the point where the program averages 1.8 children per birth.

Then the 10 month cycle starts again.

Since they are giving birth roughly every 10 months, omegas are expected to give birth about 40 times during their fertile period, having between 60 to 100 babies.

Omegas in the program would be earning income after every child and also incur expenses (they would be charged for everything; medical expenses, accommodation, nutrition, overhead costs etc), which would leave them with around 20k earned at the end of a 10 month cycle, 90% of which would go towards the debts they are working off. 10% of their earnings would be saved for when they leave the program.

(of course, young omegas would be making a lot more, but their earnings would drop off - even into the negative - as they age and have less customers, so the above is the average)

That would leave omegas aging out of the program (usually mid fifties) with 80k total for the rest of their lives.

Babies born in the program (known as POP babies) would be kept in in-house nurseries where omegas not currently entertaining would be taking care of them until they are potty trained. Then they would go into state foster care. They would receive general education until age 12 when they would be tested for their dynamics. Omegas (and any betas not fit enough for the military) would be adopted out to families. Alphas and betas would be moved to military boarding schools. Here they would get general training until age 16. At that age, betas would be enlisted for a mandatory 25 years, Alphas would take competency tests, the lower 50% would be enlisted, the top would receive specialized training. After another two years there's another test with the lower 50% enlisted - in higher positions - and the rest would go on to higher education/the academy. Only these - the best 25% of Alphas - would be allowed to decide if they want to enlist or not (they usually do, but some of them go into politics).

And there you have it, a whole dystopia!

[professor-doc-emeritus]

I want money and I'm jealous of when you post about having it. What did you go to school for

Computer Science! I'm a web developer. I did a lot of schooling tho, i have 2 bachelors (one is in writing because im a masochist) and a masters from a very good state school, I was in college for 6 1/2 years. I really enjoy working with computers, and even though what im doing right this second isn't totally my cup of tea I still find a lot to enjoy about it. I'm currently making $80k a year, and if i can get this damnable certification ill start getting a nice bonus on top of that. Most of my work is remote, and when it's not I work in a nice air conditioned building with good internet and nobody breathing down my throat making me pretend to be productive, and i can leave whenever i want.

If you find comfort in the suffering of those doing better than you, know that I don't have health insurance because i work for a rinky-dink startup, and according to elon musk im due to be replaced by the ai any day now, so pretty soon ill be off the gravy train and on the streets. I'm also extremely privileged, i graduated my undergrad with very little debt thanks to my parents saving up and an inheritance from my grandparents (the masters degree got me pretty deep in the hole tho ngl), and i fit every possible category of privilege you can think of, so my accomplishments are really just totally meaningless participation trophies that you can feel free to dismiss whole cloth. If you were in my position you'd totally be doing way better than me, the only reason you're not is because of, like, the system maaaaaaaaaaaan

if you find comfort in the possibility of a better tomorrow, know that even in an economic downturn tech is still a very accessible field. There's no government-mandated gatekeeping like in medicine and law, and you don't have to do nearly as much schooling as i did if any at all to get a good paying job. Everybody in tech knows a guy who just did a 3 month bootcamp and then got hired for good money almost immediately. Granted, the full story is usually much more complicated than that, but it is possible. Even without a formal salary, there's still lots of demand for freelance programming. Pretty much everyone is going to need a decent website at some point, if you sit down, do a few wordpress tutorials, and put your name out into the ether, im sure you can make some good money on the side when your friends need a hand. If you want to get into the tech world "proper" so to speak, I personally think college is the easiest and best way to do it, but even if its not an option for you there's still lots of great ways to make money in this industry. Opportunity abounds my friend! You just need the energy and skills to harness it.

[torque-witch]

Even tho it will fuck me at tax season again, highly considering just doing DoorDash for a few months and Etsy part time or as monthly drops because I literally can’t keep living with not making a sale for a week at a time and then begging for money because my posts rarely reach more than 5% of my followers on pretty much every platform. Do I get lucky sometimes? Sure! But I don’t feel established anywhere.

I posted about it probably here before, but I was making 2-3k a month from JUST Etsy in 2020 and half of 2021. I had a savings account of 6k, and because my husband has never had one, I blew through it all to get into this new house (rental) and then became incredibly ill for 8 months. We don’t even buy groceries regularly. We just eat snacks and then have established meals maybe 5 days a month? Like. I’m lucky if I can get more than $1200 a month now from Etsy and my bills are about $950 not including gas or food. I got one bag of groceries that lasted two days this past week for $35. And as a household we make more than 80k. We barely made rent this month. This is not even a livable wage anymore.

DoorDash is just like a quick fix, but I averaged $24 an hour and made $380 in 16 hours. If I did $120 a day 5 days a week I could replace Etsy and make $2400 a month. That’s literally a whole extra pocket of monthly bills. When I was working at Napa I was making $12/hr plus 6% commission working overtime and made around that average as a result ONLY because there were literally only 2 salespeople, both of us managers, and no one else. That was the ONLY time in my life I had an active savings account, saved $500 a month. Read that again. AND paid off one of my student loans. I have not touched them since 2020 and I still have 27k to go.

Granted I did use that proof of income to buy a new car, so that’s extra bills, but my last two cars (one from 1994 and the other from 2006) - both of their engines blew up within 6 month of each other and I was desperate. She hasn’t let me down yet.

Like?????? Of COURSE I want to continue making my art but I can’t sustain it either. Not without a savings account. I’m so conflicted.

[trillgutterbug]

sunny asks for brrrrrr wanna know about no. 8, 9, 11, 14, 16, 17 and 18/19 for you... is that too many? he he he

asdjgkldg calling my dumbass bluff with this one lmao. appreciate you friend 🙏. (already did 14, 16, and 17.)

8. Favorite side character

liam mcpoyle my beloved...... unironically thirsty for cricket too, the later the season the better. roxy also, oneoff character of ALL time 😍 rip queen. BUT THE LAWYER no contest. furthermore i've sipped deeply of the delicious refreshing lawyer/charlie koolaid.

9. Favorite non-Paddy’s location

macdennis apartment of course. regardless of how many bathrooms it may or may not have.

11. Favorite meme from the show

what an impossible question. for THE most memed show in human history?? probably dennis throwing the macaroni down the hallway tbh. even without context of any sort it's hysterical.

18. Do you create fan content? If so, what kind and what do you like about it?

in theory i write fic lmfao. in actuality i THINK about writing fic and then i message jackie a bunch of horny bullshit at 2am and fall asleep instead. i mean,, i've written a couple things but not nearly as much as i want to. what do i LIKE ABOUT IT THO??? not much lol. writing is the worst thing on earth and it's very unfortunate that i'm pathologically compelled to do it. but writing smut is truly my calling in life and it is very..... ~*inspiring, so. also love to make jackie lose her entire mind when i do manage to squeeze something out!!!! the greatest gift of all, sending your friends into a frenzy.

19. If you had the skill/talent/time to create any content you wanted, what would you want to make?

hoo this is a long list bc i'm so smart at generating ideas and so stupid at following through on them. listen i've got adhd meds coming in the mail this week so maybe that'll cure me. everyone hold your breaths starting now.

1) i wish i could figure out how to write charlie/the lawyer in a way that would make sense

2) macdennis in lockdown. i did start this one, it's the only wip on my ao3. im trying to shame myself into finishing it via the perceived judgement of others, ie the only way i ever accomplish anything. is that tactic working here? no.

3) abo, bc jackie and i have Thoughts about how that would shake out and tbh they're really good Thoughts. sure would love to write em down someday! honestly everyone send me their thoughts on gang abo dynamics im ravenous about this topic 👀

4) endless reams of senseless plotless pornography in which dennis cries his eyes out through dozens of variations on the theme of mac folding him in half and voiding his warranty

5) some kind of one-sided charden bc that is something else i have Thoughts about

6) just a metric fuckton of dennis/dee

7) i have a 3500 word document of nothing but little ideas i want to stick into fics but none of which are big enough to be fics on their own, so like..... i guess an 80k fic with some kind of magically generated plot that will permit me to wedge in seven hundred unique references to mac holding dennis' hand in public

[seelestia]

i will feed you all the ayato brainrots and you can’t stop me, this is your fate when you signed the contract to be my adopted cousin /hj

hehehe that does sound like ayalia alright!! and mwahaha i know you love your nobleman!au >:D

THE CRACK ROUTE OF YOU HEABUTTING AYATO LMAO I ADORE THAT SO MUCH and tbh i can't blame you i mean if zhongli does that with that voice of his i would break his nose with my hard skull and get a concussion myself-

his fangirls would be so jealous because it’s so apparent that he favors you. he sees you walking down the hallways and he’ll drop everything to suavely slide onto your path, ask you about your day and offers to help you carry your books to your destination. oh, you’re with a friend? he’ll introduce himself politely (as if there’s anyone in the school who doesn’t know of him) and starts assessing the situation - a potential foe? an ally that can be trusted? a neutral party he could use to his advantage? hmmmm.

when he discovers that one of the professors is your cousin, he probably tries to get brownie points from said teacher just so she can tell you how helpful and reliable he is lmao

ayato… he’s a slytherin in my book. he may not have grand ambitions but i feel like he wouldn’t exactly be opposed to use…. slightly underhanded means / something that defies rules, to secure what he wants? lol i’ve always thought of him as a cunning man… i agree that he’s definitely not a gryffindor tho! and heizou as gryffindor sounds fitting now that you said it!!

zhongli is…. uhmmm. ravenclaw vibes just bc i can see him pursuing knowledge above all things, and the other houses just doesn't seem to fit him. there might be a slight slytherin there, maybe on his younger days? xiao is a total hufflepuff methinks!! kazuha… i’m torn between gryffindor and hufflepuff. and al haitham = ravenclaw, but then again i have yet to finish the archon quest so i’m probably wrong-

I MEAN WHAT WERE YOU EXPECTING ME TO SAY YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER /J the darn beatdrop and the erhu and guzheng(?) are just. top tier 💯✨❤️ and yes orchestral music is just so. hngggg. i wish i can go to a live orchestra properly one day!!!

it is… i’m down bad…. he’s so. sljfklsjdflksd. i’m always weak for deep/calm sounding voices ;;;; dps zhongli is… okay (his meteor hits 31k last i checked but i have yet to assemble all the artifacts, i heard from my brother a full dps zhongli's meteor can hit like 80k??) xiao still does more dmg with his ult in total since he can plunge several times. i can never tire of zhongli’s eb cutscene & voicelines tho hehehe

soft men on his wedding day is just <3 all the stress in planning it out was worth it, ayato thinks as he sees you in your wedding dress... for that moment he's convinced he's the happiest man in the whole world <3 <3 i still can't decide if i want to see zhongli in a full decked suit or traditional chinese wedding outfit.....

LOL we’ll see. i mean i’m not in the mood for angst 24/7, who knows, you might get a fluffy request~

YES AND SEEING THEM BREAK DOWN BC THE LOVE OF THEIR LIFE (ME) SUFFERS? EXQUISITE. INCREDIBLE. DELECTABLE. 👌🏻💘 i swear i’m sane

the shenanigans of zhongli and his shield lmao oh i keep forgetting about the azhdaha photoshoot gotta go do that soon too!!

if i have to persevere sm ayato brainrots until death in order to stay as your cousin, then so be it. *clenches fists* no because see??? we'd break their noses or give them a concussion on accident 😭 sorry, loves, it's just a fight or flight instinct, nothing personal. <//3 (/j)

ayato just lives to see the reaction on your face; the twists and turns of your eyebrows as they frown, the way your lips would hesitate to ask him "why?", how you'd avert your gaze from him. if studying you were a subject, he would excel with such flying colors professor raiden would've raised an astonished eyebrow at him. FJKEKDJFK. i am no longer here. head empty, prefect!ayato only 🚶

rin jie, i warn you, do not let ayato see you around zhongli 🏃 because i can already feel the amused chuckles he'd hide behind his hand so politely while he makes an example from the lovesickness (simpness and we are proud /j) on your face. he'd tap his chin and say, "hmm... i wonder if one day, you'll look at me that way too?" but dw, i will never let him slander you. how dare he do that to my cousin??? know your place, pretty boy. 🤨 (/j)

true true~ the way ayato goes about things sometimes really gives off major slytherin energy. but thank goodness he uses those tactics of his to bring justice to light or just to mess light-heartedly with the people he loves 😭 i also love how in yae miko's voicelines, she actually called him an unpredictable rascal — okay, so ayato is one of the few students professor yae finds annoying, noted. (/j)

adding alhaitham to the trio??? i see, it's a quartet now 👀 yes, i 100% agree with you on zhongli as a ravenclaw !! i think geo vision and dendro vision holders are the same in the aspect of being extremely loyal and dedicated to their passion — but dendro allogenes lean more towards knowledge and some can be morally grey at times??? which is why i get slytherin vibes from alhaitham, personally! i like how the both of us are just here sorting these silly men into hogwarts houses like they're chibi figurines fjekskek

YEPP, xiao is definitely a hufflepuff. beneath that tough exterior of his, it feels like he just has an inexplicable inkling of innocence on the inside <//3 and for kazuha, i'm leaning towards hufflepuff for him??? he is a pacifist and more mellow than a gryffindor 🤔

uuuuu, good luck assembling artifacts for dps zhongli, rin jie !! i think i'm just gonna keep him as a shield support because i fought azhdaha with him on the team yesterday and i've never beaten that giant rock frog so fast before 😭 his current HP is 39k rn and idk if that's enough? how much HP would you and your brother recommend for a new zhongli haver??? asking for advice from fellow zhongli mains fjkekwkdk

ZHONGLI IN A TRADITIONAL CHINESE WEDDING OUTFIT. we already know the man looks good in suits, so to see him in a traditional chinese wedding outfit??? now, that is smth new 👀 allow me to be your wedding photographer 📸

praying that your fluffy mood switch stays on 24/7 during the period where my requests are open in the future. (/j) speaking of, what are your fav fanfic tropes??? for both fluff and angst 👀 i say this while i hold my fav angst tropes; unrequited love and right person, wrong time close to me. they may be basic, but when the love interest chooses smth over the protagonist like another person they love or a passion they can't give up on <//3 just the fact that the love you're willing to give your all for being inferior to smth else in the love interest's eyes pains me 🚶

RIGHT, THE PHOTOSHOOT. i actually tried taking a pic of azhdaha while fighting him with zhongli until the game told me i can't take pictures inside domains... no selfie with zhongli's friend then <//3 so, i had to make do with my recent victim, gimel aka geo hypostasis that i had to farm for after zhongli came home without warning — here, have some pictures taken before destruction! >:)

(ahh, true family bonding time <3 and the the way i had to keep my distance taking these because i'm scared it's gonna activate on me HRKLOFO)