#A LOT of fascinating stuff on my list

[annacaffeina]

I'm stealing this from Twitter

Here's the link

I am a high-definition gateway drug body double!

[retconomics]

who is this white haired twink you're on about recently

live picture of me telling you from the bottom of my heart not to worry about it

[sidleyparkhermit]

The other night when I was probably starting to come down with the ‘vid I decided in 2024 to just read and watch Jewish writers (or in cases like TV that have many writers, works with Jewish writers in leading creative positions). These were the wishlists I came up with so far:

Some of the TV shows are stuff I want to watch for the first time, some of them I know I want to rewatch. I already started my LOST rewatch a few weeks ago, so that’s gonna keep me occupied for a while.

[weekend-conspiracy-theorist]

I didn't even come close to finishing this fic in time for Halloween, even though I've been working on it literally since I posted the first entry in the tim&steph role swap au, but it turns out detective stories take way more effort to write than dumb, cheesy character interactions. who knew! (I did. I just also watched 32 horror movies this month.) anyway, I wanted to share something spooky for the holiday regardless, so here's a peek at what's to come...

"I'm not crazy," Melanie Diaz said, tightly. Her long, wavy dark hair was pulled up in a messy bun, slightly stringy with oil and sweat, and her jaw was clenched tight. She picked at her long sleeve tshirt, where it was pilling near the bend of her elbow.

"I know."

She snorted, rolling her eyes, and took a step away from him as she waved a hand in the air. "Yeah, it's that simple. I tell you I'm seeing ghosts, and you just--"

"Hey," Tim interjected calmly, holding up a placating hand. "Look, first, there are lots of things that can cause hallucinations. Mold, gas leaks, fear gas. This is Gotham, after all."

"I told you, I'm not--"

"That would not make you crazy," Tim told her firmly. "It would mean that there was a physical substance in your apartment causing a measurable chemical reaction in your brain. Hell," he snorted, "even if you are just hallucinating because you're hallucinating, there's still a chemical reaction happening in your brain. What's happening to you is very real, in one way or another. Alright?" He gestured her over to the couch, crouching down next to her as she sat and offering her his hand. After a short, distrustful moment, she took it, squeezing her eyes tightly shut.

"But I actually had both a second and a third point that you never let me get to," Tim added gently. "Second is that there is plenty of technology that could be utilized to make you think you were hallucinating. Speakers, projectors, stuff along those lines. And, third, and perhaps most importantly, we live in a world where Wonder Woman exists, and a stage magician who is actually magic is one of the most powerful members of the Justice League." He settled his other hand over hers and offered a gentle squeeze. "Those kinds of things don't bleed over to boring, normal people like us all that often, but it still wouldn't be completely unheard of if you were actually being haunted."

"Oh, god." Melanie groaned, setting her other hand over top of Tim's and bending over to press her forehead to it.

"Whatever is happening, we are going to figure it out together," Tim promised her. Something wet slipped between her fingers as her chest heaved silently.

[freepassbound]

4. What’s your favorite position?

5.  Which part of your body do you consider the most sexy?

15.  Do you sleep in pajamas, underwear, or nothing at all?

16.  If you had a sexual “to-do” list, what would be on top of the list?

23. How did you discover you were kinky?

17. Is a weird “sex face/orgasm face” a total deal breaker?

4: I don't think I have enough experience to have a favorite. 😂

5: I mean, the real answer is my brain - I'm very imaginative and responsive! If that's a cheat and the question is physical, my eyes are the only thing about me I really can think of as attractive, so they win by default.

15: My full birthday suit. 😁

16: Well, having intercourse for more than a minute would probably be up there. 😂

Getting pegged would be T1, though, definitely.

17: Uh, I can't imagine it being one? Can't say I ever really thought about it before.

23: I mean, I've been a macrophiliac since before I even started masturbating, so... 😂 it's probably always been there. For macrophilia it was the '93 remake of Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman... for more realistic kink it was actually Tumblr. There were some links from macro forums back to GFD/RR pages here - I poked around and really liked what I saw... and the rest is history!

[writingoddess1125]

You Give them Face Mask! 🧼

Luffy, Sanji, Zoro, Usopp, Buggy, Mihawk

Fluffy Fluff

Just felt like more Fluff Fluff rn 😌 Enjoy!

Luffy

Trying to get this man into a face mask is like trying to wash a puppy- A happy struggle and pain in the ass.

"Luffy please" You say with a sad eyes- He will fold after this and let you. However he doesn't sit still so you use a sheet mask that simply helps with oily skin.

"This smells nice" He will say as you have to bribe him with snacks to keep it on for 15 minutes.

"It's rose scented" You say and wear one yourself to keep him still with some gummy candies. Will have trouble sitting still and will start chatting and walking in circles as he waits.

Once it's over he rubs his shiny face and talks about how squeaky he sounds. Utterly destroying your work-

Sanji

Sanji is more then willing to indulge you. Picking out some mild scents and you do a peel off mask since he has deep pores.

"Wanna do the charcoal mask?" You offer which he accepts after finding the scent pleasant enough.

"Do people do these often?" He will flirt and talk about the curiosities in your self care. Once the mask is done he will complain about the tightness.

"That means it's ready to peel!!"

"AHHH! OW!!?" He yelps in surprise as you pull the mask off his face. His face bright red and raw from this so you add some water based moisturizer to his face. You show him the mask.

"That was in my face!?"

Will both be disgusted and fascinated by the amount of gunk pulled from his skin.

Zoro

His skin is fairly flawless which is honestly frustrating since he cares so little for his skin.

You offer the face mask anyway and he refuses for a while bit does eventually fold. You use a snail slime mask on him since it will keep him skin looking flawless.

"This smells funny..." He grumbles as he will lay there listening to you talk, Half asleep and waiting. Will open his eye occasionally and ask a few questions about your interest in this stuff.

You wipe it off and help him rince his face. Skin is pretty much glowing at this point and You stare in awe. "So pretty!"

"I'm going to go train now-" You scream at him in protest in trying to ruin his pretty face.

Usopp

Usopp is willing of course, since the ocean air drys his skin quite a lot. So you use a shea butter face mask and tap his skin with your fingers to help it soak in his rough skin.

"You know I once got a spa treatment from Mermaids like this-' He will spin his tales as You work. When you do rince off the mask you add some nice skin oils afterwards to his skin.

You rub a lot of oil in his skin and he will pause his stories as he judt enjoys the time. Will smell the jar you're using and a softness will run over his face in fondness.

"This smells like the stuff my mother used to use-" He will say with a smile. His skin looks shiny and golden by the time your done, making him look sexy- in his own words.

Will come back regularly to have you treat his skin and will even talk about stories with his mother from time to time.

Buggy

Grease paint wrecks havoc on one's skin Buggys especially since he wears it so much. Needs some detoxing clay mask then a aloe moisture one to replenish. If you're doing his face might as well deep condition his hair as well.

He does enjoy the attention and doing them since his face feels better. Secretly he actually has acne marks from his youth and some scars from before he ate a devil fruit.

"What was this one from?" You ask pointing to a light scar on his cheek.

"Hmm 10- Me and Shanks were trying to figure out blades better. Let's say I learned knives can bounce back at you-" He says amused and letting you work.

"The skin around your nose is dry" Buggy will frown, thinking you're about to insult him since even though he trust you the most his insecurities will win- till you carefully paint the mask on those areas and smile proudly.

"There we go, all better" You say and kiss his hand to go apply your own.

Will sit and listen to you read outloud or talk with him about show ideas as he lays there with the face mask.

"Can we do this every night?"

Mihawk

"No-" He will protest, his eyes narrowing as you offer the mask to him. However after enough begging and ever Perona joining in at pestering him he will fold.

Mihawk gets treated to a full spa day when this happens- A hydrating honey facemask on his skin, cucumbers on his eyes and even a hair mask in his hair to make it softer.

Perona is overjoyed as well as she cleans his nails and applies clear polish to make them shiny and nice! Grumbles the whole time silently and ends up Downing a bottle of wine.

"Do not get used to this-" He grumbles as he takes his wine and drinks from it as you and Perona work. He kinda looks like a spa mom-

Once done this man looks runway ready- His hair is much softer so sets lower, his skin flawless and even his beard looks nicer. Stares at you and Perona deadpanned and sighs-

"Thank you both for the nice gesture..."

[m4tthewsgf]

Period pain

Chris Sturniolo x fem reader

Summary: fluffy shit where Chris comforts his girl while she's experiencing period cramps and all that good shit

Warnings: language, blood

Author's Note: just got my period and I'm slowly dying HAHA (send me some chocolate pls). Anyway, sorry this is short lmao. Enjoy!!! You're enough!!!

---

You loved being a woman. You truly did. You loved putting together silly little outfits, wearing short skirts and crop tops and doing your makeup. It's a privilege being a girl. There's so much beauty in being one and the relationship that women have with each other is magical. There's something so special about it that no words can correctly describe it, but just the fact that we're women all together simply unites us.

However, there are a lot of things that came with being a woman that were ugly. Men who think they own anything and anyone, society's standards, sexism, patriarchy.... the list goes on. But periods? That was a goddamn curse.

You viewed women as superheroes. The fact that our bodies are able to create a whole new body with a heart and bones and brain from scratch is truly fascinating. Scary, but fascinating. That was our superpower. Yet, you and your boyfriend, Chris, were too young to start a family, even though you want to make him a father one day, and now your body is punishing you for that.

Your period pain was the worst. Your cramps felt like knives stabbing your guts, you had extreme migraines and headaches, back pain and on top of that, you were obviously bleeding out of your fucking uterus. Your mood swings were insane, to say the least, and so were your cravings.

Chris had been in a relationship with you for almost a year now so he knew what the deal was and he always tried his best to make you as comfortable as possible. You appreciated his willingness. It was adorable.

You were currently laying in your bed in a fetal position, hoping that the way you've folded your body would ease some of the pain. You have already texted your boyfriend and cancelled the plans you had made for this evening; he wanted to take you out to have a dinner date. You really wanted to go, the two of you haven't gone on a date in a while now, but you could barely breathe from the pain.

Just when you were about to put a movie on the laptop you had settled right next to you, you heard your front door open.

"Baby?" Said Chris from downstairs.

"Bedroom!" you yelled with as much energy you could. You were sure that dying would hurt less than that.

You heard your wooden stairs creak, indicating that Chris was making his way up to your room. You smiled at yourself.

"There's my angel!" He greeted you and planted a couple of kisses on your forehead and cheeks, making you giggle.

"How are you feeling baby?" he kneeled in front of you, his hands resting on the mattress and softly caressing you hair.

"Honestly if you stabbed me right now, it would hurt less" you mumbled against your pillow with half a smile.

"Well, I brought you some stuff!" Chris exclaimed before turning towards the two big bags he had placed on the floor once he entered the room.

"Obviously I got you your meds, you'll surely need em," he placed 3 boxes of Ibuprofen on your nightstand.

"Baby, I'm not downing the whole box, these will last me forever! You got 2 the previous month," you said with widened eyes.

"And? I'd rather know you have more than enough than not" he shrugged his shoulders.

"I also got you a heating pad, I read that heat helps a lot with the crumps," he pulled out a pink heating pad that was coated with a fuzzy layer of fabric.

"Then we have your favourite Yankee candles, the evergreen and caramel ones," he playfully raised his eyebrows at you, "I got a whole ass chocolate cake because I know you love that shit, some Reese's, chocolate bars..." he trailed off.

"Oh, I got some bath bombs too! Thought we'd try em out, they smell really good" he showed you two circular bath bombs, a blue and a purple one.

"And then obviously I have your pads and tampons, the Caesar's salad you go nuts about, your favourite pasta sauce...I think that's all" he finished. Even though your jaw was on the floor, it was only one of the bags he had brought with him.

"What's one the other bag?"

"Obviously some of my shirts and hoodies, jackass" he laughed at your cluelessness. You felt tears brim in your eyes. Your sensitive side came through on your period, you could cry with anything.

"Chris..." you smiled lovingly at him with a blurry vision.

"No need to cry ma, I'll take care of you m'kay?" he chuckled once more and kissed the side of your mouth.

"I love you" you softly spoke against his lips.

"I love you more baby," he kissed you again, "now, I'm gonna go run you a warm bath and then we're gonna eat whatever you want. I can get us food, whatever you're craving, or I can cook you your pasta... how does that sound?" he asked with a caring gaze.

"In n out sounds good right now if I'm being honest" you furrowed your eyebrows at him apologetically.

"Then in n out it is" Chris kissed your nose before making his way to your bathroom.

That night he didn't let you raise your hand. You needed water? He sprinted downstairs to get it. You had to use the bathroom? He escorted you, sometimes even carried you. His presence not only made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, something that always happened when he was around, but it also eased your pain. You couldn't be more thankful for him.

[cryptidghostgirl]

so sorry for this (very) specific request hope it's not ocish

anyways alastor x wife reader who's a virologist / kinda a mad scientist??(girl just wants to start a apocalypse without anyone to bother her)

Like they got married for mutual benefits (whatever benefits he would gain and her having access to money for her wildest dreams) when they were humans (whether he actually loves her or not is up to you lmao)

They both die (I assume that she would die around when he died from her own negligence caused by her 'freedom' to do her work more often without actually worrying about him finding out) and she avoids him like the plague (not that hard to realize this so called radio demon is your 'husband' when you find his secret stash of 'local cuisine' in the fridge)

Then he goes missing and she finally kinda goes out of makeshift hiding, just chilling doing her evil deeds before finding about the Hazbin Hotel from some gossip

Deciding that, while redemption is most likely not gonna happen mostly for the fact she does not care, she joins Charlie's little program. For her own little project (just wants to have a angel test subject, gotta see if they can be a good carrier for her little virus)

The reader doesn't know that Alastor's back (you think she's gonna use vox tech? Or listen to the radio? Girl uses a non vox tech phone and maybe a computer and does her work) so she goes and knocks on the door to the hotel

Thinking that this shit is gonna be easy, after all her husband is gone so she won't be bothered by him. She can focus on her beautiful creations and maybe destory hell and heaven with a apocalypse for some laughs. While also getting access to heaven through Charlie somehow (maybe even Lucifer, girl doesn't know nor care)

Anyways you can just IMAGINE her surprise that right after Charlie greets her (Vaggie ofc suspicious af cause she knows damn well no sinner wants to be redeemed for the most part) then here comes the strawberry pimp coming to say hello

Would he recognize his lovely wife? Maybe

Ofc reader had a plan, and by plan I mean she just says they were married and now acts like their divorced (death do us part and we fuckin dead)

(Just for example, do what you want <3)

Anyways I'm sorry again (can you tell that I've been watching a lot of mlp infection aus :') )

A/N bestie,, i love an overly detailed request. no apologies. i hope i did it justice <3 <3 I have literally been obsessing over the whole 'we're dead. we've been parted.' reader idea. It's so fun. Also I am very sorry it took me so long to get to this. Also, I am not a woman nor am I in STEM (I'm an enby in history) so apologies if science stuff in this is bad. I'm basing the character off of Entrapta (my love) from Nate Stevenson's She-Ra remake.

Till Death Do Us Part (Alastor x Mad Scientist!Reader)

Pairing: Alastor x Reader

Warnings: Gore. Murder. Bodies. Animal cruelty (not detailed at all just like test subjects and burning ants as a kid). Viruses/plague talk. Just capital d Death all around in this one folks. Suicide and starvation briefly mentioned.

Word Count: 2,584

Master Lists:

Master Lists 

Hazbin Hotel Master List

Y/n hadn't been sad when Alastor died. It didn't really even register on her radar that he was gone until the police showed up at her door. Their marriage was more of an agreement than anything else, a division of labor. Y/n was a talented virologist who came from a rather wealthy family. He got access to her money, using it to start his own radio studio, and Y/n? Well Y/n got a clean up crew.

She had always been fascinated by death. It was a morbid curiosity that had followed her since childhood. The typical 'burning ants with a magnifying glass to mass murderer' pipeline only, murder was not exactly her objective. Since learning of the Black Death in school, she had been fascinated by biological warfare and weaponry. The stories of soldiers throwing infected bodies over the walls of city's to break down their defenses? It was magnificent, masterful, absolutely awe inspiring. Living through the Spanish Flu epidemic in 1918, watching how it tore through her city of New Orleans, only furthered her determination.

As soon as she had had the knowledge base to do so, she began working on bio-weapons on her own. She wanted to create a disease, to devastate the world. She wanted to watch the things around her crumble into ruin and know it was by her hand.

She'd found out about Alastor's hobby by accident. They were friends, of a sort, in that Y/n would show up randomly where ever he was and quiz him about radio waves. He worked at a radio station and she knew that. She had followed him, tracked him down. There was no reasoning behind it save he was the first person she'd really found out about that was involved in the business in New Orleans. She would pick his mind about getting the word out about things, marketing, advertising. She was prepping for the main event, for the day she finally created her magnum opus.

One day, when she had shown up unannounced at his door and broken in when he didn't respond to her knocking, Y/n had discovered him dismembering one of his victims. Alastor had stared at her, wide eyed in shock, fear and adrenaline mixing into an intoxicating combination in his veins. Y/n had just smiled.

She had been wondering about human experimentation for a while now. Animals were easy to cover up, easy to bury in the back yard but people? It had always been too risky, up until now anyways.

So it went like this: Y/n funded Alastor's dreams and he hid the side effects of hers. When he died, Y/n didn't really feel anything too strongly about it at all. Yes, it made life harder in that if she wanted to keep using human guinea pigs she'd have to figure out a way to dispose of them on her own but it also made it easier. Alastor had always been so obsessed with image, dragging her to office parties and forcing her to sit down to meals with him. Now that he was gone, she could work on her projects in peace once again. The body thing was something she would figure out along the way. She was smart and she wasn't going to let something like that stop her, not when she was this close to cracking it.

As it turns out, Alastor had been more of a help than Y/n believed. So used to his nattering and persistence, she had stopped eating. It wasn't long before she joined her husband in death. The papers of course had a field day with it. Heiress and Virologist Y/n L/n Withers Away Due to Heartbreak. Y/n L/n Starved Herself to Death and Joins her Murderer of a Husband. Virologist Commits Suicide After Revelation of Dead Husband's Criminal Deeds.

When Y/n had woken up in Hell, her whole world had been turned upside down. If there was life after death, what was the point of killing everyone on earth? She was back at square one.

Rumors were already buzzing through the streets of Hell about some new overlord, some Radio Demon, who had a strikingly similar MO to her husband. Not wanting any distractions this time around, Y/n secluded herself in the outskirts of the pride ring to reformulate her plans.

For decades she worked, trying to create a poison to wipe out the dual planes of the underworld. Work was easier here. No one questioned why she bought the things she bought, no one got upset when people went missing. Hell, no one even blinked twice if they saw her burying a body. It was a veritable paradise for Y/n.

Eventually, news reached her of the Radio Demon's disappearance. Y/n had never been the biggest fan of technology that wasn't involved in her work. In the world of the living, she had barley read the papers. All the machines in her laboratory were ones she had built herself through trial and error. But still, somehow, the news reached her and she felt elated. The last thing weighing her down, the last road block had officially been lifted.

Within seven years, she had perfected the disease. Having run tests on lower rings of Hell, she prided herself on her ability to make it so infections, so deadly. The survival was on par with that of unvaccinated human's infected by rabies. But her plan wasn't complete, no. Taking out everyone in Hell wasn't good enough, she had to figure out how to get it into Heaven as well.

That was when the perfect opportunity fell in her lap. Y/n nearly cried when she caught sight of the interview through the window of a shop selling Vox branded TVs. Charlie Morningstar, Lucifer's little brat, was creating a hotel for sinners, where they could be rehabilitated and sent to Heaven. It was perfect, almost too perfect. Y/n didn't question it, her own excitement blinding her. She barley even took the time to come up with a plan that consisted of more than get into the hotel and get her hands on an angel. She figured that was something that could be dealt with later on.

After a few days of research and snooping, she finally made her move. Having packed her bags and woven her way through the streets of Pentagram City, she found herself before the brightly lit marquee of the Hazbin Hotel. Placing her bag on the ground beside her, the test tubes and various paraphernalia inside clinked gently against one another. Raising her hand, she knocked on the door.

It was Charlie herself who answered, with wide eyes and an earnest smile. A smaller moth demon beside her crossed her arms, eyeing Y/n with doubt. It barley registered with the excitable demon, she was used to the strange looks. The new form Hell had granted her with when she died was odd, after all. She was still the same height, still held a roughly human shape, but her hair had become its own beast. It moved like secondary limbs, falling nearly to the floor from the pigtails she had tied it up into. It shot up into the air around her in joy at the sight of yet another open door in her path, this one literal rather than figurative.

"Hello!" Charlie exclaimed, "Are you here to check in?"

"Yes, check in." Y/n nodded, using her hair to pick her bag back up.

She took a step forward, trying to enter the hotel, but found her path blocked by the smaller grey demon. Her arms were uncrossed now, one of them pointing a spear right at Y/n's neck. Y/n didn't flinch, she simply looked down at it in curiosity, reaching a finger up to touch the end.

"Ow." she said flatly as the spear's tip pressed into the pad of her finger.

Raising it to her eyes, she rubbed the droplet of blood that had pooled on her pointer finger with her thumb before turning back to the spear.

"Is this..." Y/n leaned forward, grabbing the spear's shaft.

"Hey!" Vaggie yelled threateningly as Y/n crouched down, examining the weapon carefully.

"Oh my stars, this is an angelic blade, isn't it?" she exclaimed, her eyes still fixed on the spear.

"Uh..."

Vaggie was more confused now than anything and she took the slightest step away from the excited demon. Y/n followed her and soon, they were in the entry way to the hotel. Charlie watched the scene play out with mild amusement, finding her girlfriends bewildered state rather charming. She let the door fall shut.

"It is, isn't it?" Y/n asked again, "But how did you get it? Did you make it? What do you do with it? Is it more effective than normal weapons? Why a spear? I-"

"What's this, we have a new guest?" a crackling voice cut Y/n off.

"Uh, yes!" Charlie stepped in, turning to face the newcomer.

Y/n, still preoccupied with the spear, was now engaged in trying to get Vaggie to let her hold it.

"I think..." Charlie doubtfully added, her brow furrowing at the site.

"Well well well, a little devil." Alastor hummed, turning to watch the show as well, "Honestly, reminds me of someone I knew back when I was alive and kicking. Ah well, what's her name?"

"I don't... actually know that yet." Charlie admitted, fiddling with her hands a bit as she spoke, "But she seems really enthusiastic about being here!"

"It seems she more interested in that spear of Vaggie's than the idea of redemption." Alastor noted in response.

"Are either of you going to help me or are you just gonna sit and watch?" Vaggie exclaimed, trying her best to pry the spear out of Y/n's grip.

Alastor sighed and with a twirl of his microphone, a shadow arose, pulling Y/n off Vaggie. There was a split second where the smile on the girl's face fell. It quickly returned as she caught sight of what exactly had interrupted her escapades. Placing her bag on the floor with her hair, she wormed around in the shadow's arms, turning to face it. Tentatively, she poked it.

"Would you stop that?" Alastor asked, his voice thick with irritation.

Y/n poked the shadow again.

"What is this? How are you doing this?"

When no response came from the demon in question, she at last turned to face him.

"Oh."

She stilled in her movements and Alastor allowed the shadow to disappear.

"No reason to be scared." Charlie quickly stepped in, "I know Alastor here has a bit of a... reputation, but he is actually helping us at the hotel. He's really a great once you get to know him."

Alastor's smile widened as he bowed his head slightly in recognition of the praise.

"If you're going to be staying her-"

"You can't seriously be thinking of letting her stay here, Charlie." Vaggie cut in, "She's been here what, five minutes? And all thats come of it is chaos."

"Vaggie, come on, don't be like that." Charlie turned to her girlfriend, "Everyone deserves a second chance, that's the whole reason we built this place."

"But does she even want to be redeemed? I mean, what if she's... I don't know, trying to take us down from the inside out? What if she's a journalist or some shit trying to write us bad reviews?"

"You flatter me." Y/n smiled and Vaggie scoffed.

"See?"

"Isn't that all the more reason to let her in? Vaggie, if she is undercover as a journalist or something, we just have to prove to her how amazing what we're doing here is."

"I don't know... I've never seen her before, what if she's another one Vox sent?"

Y/n shook her head, sticking her tongue out slightly in disgust at this notion and Alastor chuckled. There really was something so familiar about this demon and her antics. Even if she was a tad irritating, it was a comfortable familiarity.

"Then we will figure it out, same way we did with Sir. Pentious. Okay?"

"Fine." Vaggie relented at last with a sigh.

Smiling brightly, Charlie turned back to Y/n.

"So, hi. I'm Charlie, welcome to the Hazbin Hotel! What's your name?"

Y/n's eyes flicked back and forth between Alastor and Charlie for a moment before settling on Charlie.

"Y/n L/n."

Alastor let out a little laugh of disbelief, a sound he had meant to keep in. He couldn't help it. Of course this little mess of a demon was his favorite crazy wife. Alastor had looked for Y/n on occasion, always keeping an eye on news involving anything scientific but, he had never found a trace. Not that he'd admit it but, in their time together, he had grown rather fond of the girl. Not love, never love, but a sort of familial feel. Everyone turned to face him.

"Are you alright, Alastor?" Charlie asked, walking over to him and placing a hand on his arm which he quickly brushed off.

"Yeah, do you know her or something?" Vaggie added, "Is she dangerous?"

"No..." he paused, his brow slightly furrowed, "She's my wife."

The room fell silent.

"You... you didn't recognize your own wife?" Vaggie asked in disbeleif.

"Ex-wife." Y/n corrected with a little sigh.

This was all becoming so tedious. She hadn't come here to sit and talk with people. While the spear and the shadow had been fun, they had both run their courses and she just wanted to get to work.

"I..." Alastor turned back to Y/n, "Ex-wife?"

Y/n shrugged.

"So you didn't recognize your wife and you didn't know you were divorced?" Vaggie asked, rubbing her temples, "Jesus fuck, man."

"I..." Alastor cleared his throat, "We were married when we were alive. I didn't even know she was dead yet."

"Yeah." Y/n shrugged, "Turns out all your nattering was what was keeping me alive. I forgot to eat, starved to death."

Alastor's eyes softened slightly for a moment at the notion. She had needed his care so badly that she had died with out it. It felt good, in a strange way. Satisfying. They darkened again as he recalled her earlier statement.

"Ex-wife?" he asked again, taking a step towards Y/n.

She looked up at him, her expression blank.

"Yeah?"

"When did we get a divorce!" Alastor exclaimed once he realized she would say nothing else on the matter without his prompting.

"Oh! We didn't." Y/n nodded, smiling slightly, "Now, can I go to my room?"

"No, Y/n. Why are you calling yourself my ex-wife? We are still married."

Y/n looked around at Charlie and Vaggie, seeing if they were going to back up her claim. Sighing, she turned back to Alastor.

"Do I really have to lay it out for you?" she paused and Alastor just stared at her, eyebrows raised, "Jesus. Uh, Al, we died."

"Yes...?"

"Till death do us part? That was the agreement."

"I... Well..." he was at a complete and total loss for how to respond.

She wasn't wrong, he just didn't like her answer very much.

"So... the agreement is done... yeah?"

"I mean," Alastor shook his head slightly, "I guess?"

"Great! Can someone please show me to my room now."

---

Next Part -> Till Death Do Us Part pt. 2

[angelltheninth]

Ok so hear me out, Lo’ak and Neteyam with a human s/o who gets an avatar(despite it being impossible). Like they’re just working on stuff and the next thing they know, they hear their s/o calling out to them and they seem a tad bit taller and ever-so-slightly bluer than when they last saw each other. And they’re both excited because they’ll be able to do even more now?

Seems impossible? Oh please, my job is to write impossible into possible over here. Nothing's impossible as long as you've got your imagination to work through it.

Pairing: Neteyam, Lo'ak x Fem!Reader

Tags: fluff, established relationship, a second first meeting, teasing, flirting, tail shenanigans, biting, hissing, growling, showing off

A/N: I like the impossible. Which is why I gravitate so much towards fantasy and then contemporary stuff, especially in books and movies.

NETEYAM

He was really excited about it at first, until he realized that he has so much explaining to do, not just to his family but also to you

You were scared, you didn't get what was happening, how you're like him all of a sudden so the first thing on his list was to calm you down

He knelt with you gently down on the grass and pressed his forehead to yours, looking into your eyes, his hands smoothing over your shoulders assuring you that this is real, that he is real, he's here

After you managed to calm down a little he took you by the hand and started walking, faster, faster, then he jumped and pulled you along, never leaving your side, there to catch you if you stumble

You were fascinated and a little overwhelmed by all the new sensations you were suddenly able to feel

Not that he could relate to that exactly since that was how he always felt but he understood the need for adjustment, his family moved a few times in his life and it always took a while to get used to the new areas

Once you calmed down he started to drag his hand from the base of your ponytail all the way down your back to your tail and to its end, making you shiver like never before

He traced your markings, commenting on how beautiful they looked on you

Caught you looking at his fangs, he chuckled when you covered your mouth and eased your hands down, don't hide

It might feel odd now, being different then just a day ago, but he will be here for you, he will teach you

LO'AK

First of all, he freaks out a little too, he has no idea how he'll begin to explain this to his dad, or you, or anyone

Even so he can't keep that damn grin off his face to save his life, or seem to keep himself from looking you over

Can you blame him for being happy? Now he can show you all the cool things he can do, you can do them together, he doesn't have to be afraid of hurting you when you cuddle or kiss or playfight

It's exciting for sure, and don't worry, he'll make sure to show you the ropes first

He has to take you to meet Payakan, again, but he's sure it'll be much easier for you now

Maybe you can even bond, first with plants to get used to the sensation of it as it's sure to be a lot for you, but he wants you to be able to experience everything that he can

If you were able to blush you would when you feel his hand wrap around the end of your tail so gently and with a little curiosity

And then came the purr, the damn purr that made you want to swim, or run or fly away never to be seen again, don't worry he thought it was very cute, if a little quiet

He teaches you how to hiss and growl too, making sounds your human lungs were unable to before and he thinks you sound absolutely adorable

There are so many things he wants to show you, teach you but first he needs to do something he's been wanting to do since he saw you, kiss you and hold you close and feel you purr against him

[nerdy-hyperfixations]

This is very self indulgent, but all of my art is self indulgent sooo.

I’m pretty sure if you were born in the 2000s you’re almost guaranteed to have some strange fascination or obsession with zombies. I do. I very much love zombies I wish I was more creative in drawing zombies. Anyway these actually supposed to be on the same page but there was dead space so I cut it up. The real thing below the cut.

I listed to Echoisweird for the first time in YEARS while I drew this (I always think of her when I see kool-aid) and it was STRANGE. I remember I loved her sketchbook tours when I was younger, she’s probably why I love scene-core art, which is funny because she brings up Jhonen Vasquez a lot as an inspiration for her so it’s kinda like I was inspired by him before I even knew he existed (I didn’t get to watch Invader Zim as a kid because my parents didn’t pay for cable, though I’d probably have loved it). Fun fact about me that’s relatively related, I LOVED the Zombie Island Poptropica level but I never finished it and now it doesn’t exist and it makes me sad.

I used this as a destressor because when I got home from rehearsal today I felt like I was dying. I’m definitely procrastinating on that essay I have to write but personally it makes me want to die thinking about it because it’s such a big weight on my mind especially since I’m sure I don’t actually have the time for it. (I’d have more time if I didn’t draw as much but personally I enjoy having a life) thank you for coming to my Ted talk, enjoy your day and stuff idk haha

[i4oba]

nct dream’s ideal types / MARK version! ✿..

[aka who i think would suit the members :D]

i feel like, since mark is pretty laid back most of the time, someone a little more.. adventurous? would suit him a lot, just to get him out of the comfort zone

i’m not talking literally, you don’t have to be indiana jones or something, just someone who’s open to try many many new things ? constantly seeking some type of rush from everything New (if that makes sense)

i can totally envision him with someone who’s like… it may sound weird, but doesn’t view themself as “pretty” or “attractive” yk… i’m not talking about the usual lack of confidence tho

it’s just that they never really prioritize their looks and all. i mean, of course they would CARE but wouldn’t think it’s that important

i also think that someone, who’s always deemed as “weird” and “unusual” would TOTALLY be something mark would go for

not only because of the doses of something extraordinary but because he’s interested. you can pique his interest if you say something so outta pocket that would normally cause a few harsh replies

i feel like mark is the type that doesn’t want to be limited, who knows he has limitless potential, not just talent wise but overall, as in… he knows he’s got greater purposes on this world

hence why i said a partner who’s curious enough to bring that out of him—sometimes he can get caught up on work and stuff so he needs Relax time, but not like the laying down and not doing anything kind

the type where you go round and round, finding the deeper meaning of things, such as talking about philosophical questions etcetera

that’s why i partly feel like he would be into someone who’s really really smart. he would love the constant feeling of fascination whenever his partner would say some random, niche fact on a topic he’s never heard of

he’s the type of guy, in my eyes, who loves to absorb knowledge and always tries to do so, which makes place for a partner who’s able to kind of stimulate him in that way?

if you know what i mean LMFAO

i feel like opening up fully for mark, would take a bit longer…? and he would absolutely stay in this “bro zone” kind of situation as well, so someone chill has to be the one he finds

he’s all about keeping it lowkey and if you’re impatient… well, your loss

and it’s not because he’s ashamed of you or something, it’s just that it’s more comfortable for him? in a way? feelings can be a little bit scary sometimes so you gotta leave him to handle it himself

so the keyword here is Patience

you cannot rush things!!!!!!!

especially since i genuinely believe that he… wouldn’t necessary look for love, you know

i can totally envision him just befriending someone and then comes all the cliché, him falling in love blah blah

he’s SO friends to lovers in my eyes, what can i say… falling for the bros is NOT on the list LMFAO and then here we go

but you know, it’s easier like that, and he works sooo hard, he never really focuses on finding a partner, not dating that actively because he’s busy

(i can totally see him panicking when he first realizes that he’s in love with one of his closest friends… he would be Shocked AHAH)

so yeah, developing feelings for him would definitely not take that much of time?? in my opinion?? it’s just him accepting it kinda, you know

being chill and pretty cool is something he would definitely find attractive, especially because, i think??? he doesn’t care about looks that much

he’s the type of guy who’s all about what’s on the inside :) so he needs someone who’s got the same mindset????

that’s a big thing for him anyways.. he wants to feel secure? like he’s not alone!

don’t leave him alone!!!!!!! he’s a cutie patootie, he needs love!!!!!!! even if he doesn’t show it!!!!!!!! he Does need it!!!!!

have so much love for him, be easy going and open minded and honestly, you’ve goz mark lee on his knees :,)

FEEL FREE TO DISAGREE THOUGH!!! this is only my perception of him! :)

& for some visual representation — STYLEBOARDS! :) <3

[kociamieta]

Out of the scale of 1 to 10 which version/interpretations of angels look horrifying or majestic?

1. Bayonetta Angels

2. Evangelion Angels

3. Diablo Angels

4. Legion Angels

5. Classic Bible Accurate Angels

6. Angelerium Angels

8. DOOM angels

7. Ultrakill Angels

8. The Woodsprite and Death from Guillermo Del Toro's Pinnochio

9. Dark Souls Angels

10. Shin Megamei Tensei Angels

anon i'm afraid i'm unfamiliar with like, 70% of these. so i can't "rate" them other than based on their looks. instead of a scale of 1 to 10 you're getting my thoughts on their designs as i am notoriously bad at Ranking Things. and some babbling overall. enjoy

starting off with Bayonetta angels. Holy shit. the range.... monster-looking ones? humanoids? ships??? cars????? the flesh inside those gold and marble shells??? love them, quite horrifying and majestic at once.

Evangelion! cool stuff. always love some strange organic shapes for angels, and the very geometric ones are pretty interesting as well

Diablo. i like the tendril-like wings. the lack of a visible face is pretty cool as well..

i... i'm assuming you're talking about the 2010 movie "Legion". no comment on this one.

i'm not really sure what "Classic Bible Accurate Angels" would entail. if you're pedantic enough, you can argue that the cherubim and ophanim in Ezekiel's vision aren't exactly "angels" in the literal sense of the word. malakim/messengers/angels could appear as pretty much human. either way, the celestial being category is quite fascinating

my jaw dropped when i saw the Angelarium website. the designs?? the drawings themselves???? the writing as well. obsessed with this???? hello....... Definitely quite majestic

DOOM. huh. that's a pretty interesting looking alien behind that armor. i'm assuming the angel comparison works in the game's context

ULTRAKILL! yay! Gabriel and the Council's armor are pretty cool, and i like the virtues too (their concept art is so good!!!). hope we get to see more angels in the future.

ahhhhg they're both so cool. love how Death is a sphynx. i can't tell if they're exactly supposed to be angels (saw the Woodsprite called a "fairy" somewhere?), but the motifs are so good regardless

Dark Souls. ojh wow. i think these are the most disturbing on this list, i love them. taking organic shapes to another level.... they remind me of mycelia.... huge win for horrifying angel nation

i wasn't really sure what to focus on with Shin Megami Tensei. the angel enemy itself (poor thing went through a lot, design wise)? the divine demon class as a whole (a... lot of characters to look at)? so i went with the archangels. their SMT IV versions are great, the ornate and quite organic-looking shapes put them on the majestic end of the spectrum for me

[strawberry-crocodile]

Saw the Barbie movie. It was fascinating, had some laughs, pulled a lot of strong feelings, definitely had some interesting politics and Bad moments. The thing that stuck out to me was (spoilers ig) the moment when, during the scene where the Barbies are pretending to be vulnerable to distract the Kens, the one played by a trans actress gets a close up where she just lists a few anxieties about her appearance and presentation and whether people will "like her" and. If you know that that's a trans woman, it reads as a definite acknowledgement of the specific and severe flavor of misogyny trans women face.

And I was excited about it at first! Transfem rep that is an expression of our lives and our experiences! Except... it's not, not explicitly. I remembered the Gwen Stacy shitstorm, and how neither she nor this Barbie were explicitly trans. And I saw the next decade laid out, clever winks and nods to trans identity and experiences, but played in such a way that fragile conservatives aren't confronted with it. And the thought of my existance going from "object of horror and mockery" to "quiet dogwhistle so as not to offend anyone" really put a fuckin downer on the whole experience. I need to watch more indie stuff.

[loveinhawkins]

“What do you write about?” Steve asks.

The question slips out on a summer night, the kind where the grass still holds a residual heat after the sun has set. They’re on that hill, the highest point in Hawkins—the one Dustin calls Weather-something. Eddie got a real kick out of hearing the name when they’d walked up here, laughing as they began an impromptu race to the top (“Not fair, you distracted me! Didn’t take you for a cheat, Harrington.”).

It feels special that they’re here, Steve thinks. That there’s even a hill to be on.

Eddie is plucking away at his acoustic guitar; he has a tell where he repeats a few meandering musical phrases, and Steve knows that there’s a song beginning to grow underneath his fingertips.

Eddie pauses mid-pluck of a string as he registers Steve’s question. He smiles, huffs almost fondly, “What a question, Steve.” Doesn’t even hesitate when he answers, “Just… good things, man. The things I love.”

Steve doesn’t know how he does it—just says that sort of stuff out in the open, like it’s nothing. Like it’s everything.

“Okay, but…” Steve pulls out a few blades of grass, smirks when they brush across Eddie’s bare ankle and he jumps slightly; it must tickle. “Like what?”

Eddie’s smile grows. “Why? You makin’ a list?” But before Steve can think of a reply, he adds, “Oh, y’know. Loads of things.” He gestures at their surroundings, winks. “Like… a summer day. And, well…” His eyes flicker to the town below them. He shrugs, but it comes across as a painful attempt at looking casual. “Hawkins, I guess.”

“Why?” Steve says, can’t stop himself.

How can you still… Don’t you hate it? I fucking hate it, sometimes.

Because, in the end, it wasn’t The Upside Down that had almost killed Eddie. Not really.

It was people.

Eddie is staring at him. He sets the guitar aside, leaning forward and peering at Steve like he’s doing something particularly fascinating.

“You’re angry.”

Steve shakes his head reflexively, feels a prickle of defensiveness. He keeps his voice as even as he can when he says, “No, I’m not.”

“Oh, you are,” Eddie says softly. Something must show on Steve’s face because he amends, “Like, not… Don’t worry. Not a loud anger.”

Eddie says things like that sometimes, things that bring Steve up short. He wonders, not for the first time, if Eddie’s dad was loud in his anger.

“You know how I know?” Eddie is so close now that Steve can see where the bridge of his nose has been turned red by the sun. “Your eyes, Steve. They burn. What’s all that about, huh?” He throws in a little playful tone at that, but when Steve doesn’t smile, he sobers. “Just… seems like a lotta energy, is all.”

He doesn’t say it, but Steve can hear it. Hates that he can hear it.

Seems like a lot of energy to waste on me.

“I just—” Steve sighs, casts a glance at the landscape down below. Works his jaw. He’s no good at this, he thinks. The words get stuck. They almost took everything from you.

But Eddie just smiles back like he gets it, like he can hear Steve, too.

“Everything’s a mix of good and bad, right? One doesn’t, like, cancel out the other. Not always.”

And Steve hears I hate it sometimes, too. But that can’t stop my love.

Steve tries again. “It’s just…” He turns away from Hawkins, looks right into Eddie’s eyes. “Eddie. You deserve… better.”

Eddie’s expression softens. He leans closer still. “You’ve got a big heart, Steve Harrington.”

And then…

He kisses Steve on the cheek, chaste and sweet, lips still warm from a day in the sun.

“You’re one of my good things,” Eddie whispers.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Middlemen without enshittification

I'm on tour with my new novel The Bezzle! Catch me next in SALT LAKE CITY (Feb 21, Weller Book Works) and SAN DIEGO (Feb 22, Mysterious Galaxy). After that, it's LA, Seattle, Portland, Phoenix and more!

Enshittification describes how platforms go bad, which is also how the internet goes bad, because the internet is made of platforms, which is weird, because platforms are intermediaries and we were promised that the internet would disintermediate the world:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/30/go-nuts-meine-kerle/#ich-bin-ein-bratapfel

The internet did disintermediate a hell of a lot of intermediaries – that is, "middlemen" – but then it created a bunch more of these middlemen, who coalesced into a handful of gatekeepers, or as the EU calls them "VLOPs" (Very Large Online Platforms, the most EU acronym ever).

Which raises two questions: first, why did so many of us end up flocking to these intermediaries' sites, and how did those sites end up with so much power?

To answer the first question, I want you to consider one of my favorite authors: Crad Kilodney (RIP):

https://archive.org/details/thecradkilodneypapers

When I was growing up, Crad was a fixture on the streets of Toronto. All through the day and late into the evening, winter or summer, Crad would stand on the street with a sign around his neck ("Very famous Canadian author, buy my books, $2" or sometimes just "Margaret Atwood, buy my books, $2"). He wrote these deeply weird, often very funny short stories, which he edited, typeset, printed, bound and sold himself, one at a time, to people who approached him on the street.

I had a lot of conversations with Crad – as an aspiring writer, I was endlessly fascinated by him and his books. He was funny, acerbic – and sneaky. Crad wore a wire: he kept a hidden tape recorder rolling in his coat and he secretly recorded conversations with people like me, and then released a series of home-duplicated tapes of the weirdest and funniest ones:

https://archive.org/details/on-the-street-crad-kilodney-vol-1

I love Crad. He deserves more recognition. There's an on-again/off-again documentary about his life and work that I hope gets made some day:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/09/free-sample/#putrid-scum

But – and this is the crucial part – there are writers out there I want to hear from who couldn't do what Crad did. Maybe they can write books, but not edit them. Or edit them, but not typeset them. Or typeset, but not print. Or print, but not spend the rest of their lives standing on a street-corner with a "PUTRID SCUM" sign around their neck.

Which is fine. That's why we have intermediaries. I like booksellers (I was one!). I like publishers. I like distributors. I like their salesforce, who go forth and convince the booksellers of the world to stock books like mine. I have ten million things I want to do before I die, and I'm already 52, and being a sales-rep for a publisher isn't on my bucket list. I am so thankful that someone else wants to do this for me.

That's why we have intermediaries, and why disintermediation always leads to some degree of re-intermediation. There's a lot of explicit and implicit knowledge and specialized skill required to connect buyers and sellers, creators and audiences, and other sides of two-sided markets. Some producers can do some of this stuff for themselves, and a very few – like Crad – can do it all, but most of us need some help, somewhere along the way. In the excellent 2022 book Direct, Kathryn Judge lays out a clear case for all the good that middlemen can do:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/12/direct-the-problem-of-middlemen/

So why were we all so anxious for disintermediation back in the late 1990s? Here's a hint: it wasn't because we hated intermediaries – it was because we hated powerful intermediaries.

The point of an intermediary is to serve as a conduit between producers and consumers, buyers and sellers, audiences and creators. When an intermediary gains power over the audience – say, by locking them inside a walled garden – and then uses that lock-in to screw producers and appropriate an ever larger share of the value going between them, that's when intermediaries become a problem.

The problem isn't that someone will handle ticketing for your gig. The problem is that Ticketmaster has locked down all the ticketing, and the venues, and the promotions, and it uses that power to gouge fans and rip off artists:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/20/anything-that-cant-go-on-forever-will-eventually-stop/

The problem isn't that there's a well-made website that lets you shop for goods sold by many small merchants and producers. It's that Amazon has cornered this market, takes $0.51 out of every dollar you spend there, and clones and destroys any small merchant who succeeds on the platform:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/25/greedflation/#commissar-bezos

The problem isn't that there's a website where you can stream most of the music ever recorded. It's that Spotify colludes with the Big Three labels to rip off artists and sneaks crap you don't want to hear into your stream in order to collect payola:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/09/12/streaming-doesnt-pay/#stunt-publishing

The problem isn't that there's a website where you can buy any audiobook you want. It's that Amazon's Audible locks every book to its platform forever and steals hundreds of millions of dollars from creators:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/25/can-you-hear-me-now/#acx-ripoff

The problem, in other words, isn't intermediation – it's power. The thing that distinguishes a useful intermediary from an enshittified bully is power. Intermediaries gain power when our governments stop enforcing competition law. This lets intermediaries buy each other up and corner markets. Once they've formed cozy cartels, they can capture their regulators and commit rampant labor, privacy and consumer violations with impunity. That capture also lets them harness governments to punish smaller players that want to free workers, creators, audiences and customers from walled gardens. It also hands them a whip-hand over their workers, so that any worker who refuses to aid in these nefarious plans can be easily fired:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/30/go-nuts-meine-kerle/#ich-bin-ein-bratapfel

A world with intermediaries is a better world. As much as I love Crad Kilodney's books, I wouldn't want to live in a world where the only books on my shelves came from people prepared to stand on a street-corner wearing a "FOUL PUS FROM DEAD DOGS" sign.

The problem isn't intermediaries – it's powerful intermediaries. That's why the world's surging antitrust movement is so exciting: by reinstating competition law, we can keep intermediaries small and comparatively weak, so that creators and audiences, drivers and riders, sellers and buyers, and other groups seeking to connect will not find themselves made subservient to middlemen.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/19/crad-kilodney-was-an-outlier/#intermediation