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#ACROSS THE FRUITED PLAIN
textmel8r · 3 months
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[ DRABBLE ] 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐀𝐑 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 ! ( ninth installment ) in which you find toji fushiguro’s number off a sugar baby site .
୨୧˚ part; one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight. nine. ten. eleven.
୨୧˚ incl; toji fushiguro
୨୧˚ cw; sugar mommy! reader , sugar baby! toji , mentions of sex , profanity , crying , angst
୨୧˚ an; does anyone even care about this anymore LMDOAOO but for real, i’m sorry for how late this part got out. i am battling severe writers block it is dangling me by the BAWLLSSS,, im thinking that this series is coming to a close soon and i never meant for it to get this deep but here we are 🦝 thank you all for being so patient with me i lob you
୨୧˚ join my discord server ! we share headcanons, fanfic recs, color roles, and more drooling emoji
There was something about thunderstorms that Toji always felt drawn to. They were great; overbearing in a way, rolling through and burying a perfectly fine day under gallons of rainwater and gray skies. Authoritative, condemning humans to take shelter lest they wish to drown in its fruits. Suffering the consequences; soaked-through clothes and sopping hair. He watches the pane of glass at the roof, a skylight barred into the flat of your high rise ceilings. The rain storm had reduced it into nothing but a drab, dusty square, baring the pelts of precipitation like punishment. Toji holds you in your bed. Your weight drapes across his chest like a blanket, your head tucked beneath the cut of his chin.
“Do you like the rain, Toji?”
He felt naked, both in the literal and metaphorical sense. The silken sheets that wrap your mattress were unfamiliar against this flesh, cold and slippery. Regretting the forfeit of pajamas. You two had shared a shower after dinner, of which you held him with all the sentiment in the world. Toji fucking hates when people stand at his back. He doesn’t like it, feeling a presence before seeing them. But he let you stay centimeters behind, working peach and ginger scented shampoo into the roots of his scalp. When he was a boy and his mother had yet to find a place in the Zenin's private graveyard, he vaguely remembers receiving analogous strokes of care from the only family member in his life who didn’t see him as a filthy disgrace. Mom bathed him like this, scrubbing blood and tarnish from his cheeks with a threadbare handkerchief in that tin can he called a tub. All that fucking family money, but a new washcloth or a proper bathtub was never in the cards for him. He remembers mom apologizing often when she washed him.
Toji fucked you in the shower. A difficult means of having sex, sure, but slippery surfaces and soap in the eyes weren’t enough to quell that undying twist of hunger. So he took you against the sleek porcelain wall with his hands shelving beneath the curve of your ass and your legs constricting at his waist. You guided him to a quick orgasm with spouts of hushed praises spoken to his ear; he was certain you didn’t cum, didn’t feel that cute clench you did the first night you two slept together, but you lied and told him you did with a reassuring grin. Why did you lie?
“It’s fine, I guess.” A hand caressed your thigh, the one that was slung over and hiked up onto his stomach. Toji grazed his nails over your flesh, mindless and dejected.
Thunder clapped, then lightning struck, and all Toji could think in the moment was about you and him. Together. Stark nude in bed with limbs entwined. He, the thunder; loud and fierce. Scary, enough to make little children and small animals shake and cower in the corner with fear. You’re more like lightning, he supposes. Elegant and powerful, something so naturally beautiful. 
You will hear thunder and remember me.
More thunder boomed. Toji squeezes your body tighter. “I like that.”
“Like what?” He asks.
You trace wobbly circles against his collar bone, avoiding the slices of silvery skin that raised off the plain of skin. Scars, Toji was doused in gauges. Scraped up head to toe, and he could feel your eyes dart lazily between each and every one of them. “I like the thunder,” comes your reply, followed by a small, bashful shrug. “Ever since I was a kid.”
Toji scoffs. Fuckin’ mind reader. “Liar. Nobody likes thunder.”
“Don’t call me a liar,” you slap his cheek playfully. “I mean it. The quiet can be disturbing sometimes. But to me, thunder is so… human-like? Makes me forget I’m alone.”
This has the man tossing his head back against your feathered pillow. “You’re so full of shit.”
Another stroke of brooding thunder rapped against the window like knock, and if Toji was a believer in the Gods above, he’d curse every last one of them for their shitty comedic timing. You’re giggling into his neck; Toji can feel warm puffs of breath fan over his pulse point. “See?” You ask through a grin. “He came back to yell at you.” He, referring to the crack of thunder. Toji rolls his eyes. Leaves a pinch at your thigh.
“Hey, what did you say before?” Toji walked his fingertips down the curve of your spine, stopping just above your ass. “The fuckin’—the french thing?”
How did it go again? Tu mas something?
It took a moment for you to decipher what he was talking about.
“Tu m'as manqué, Toji?”
Toji bit down on the tip of his tongue, stifling a smile at the grandeur in which you held when speaking the delicate French language. He nods, “what’s it mean?” 
“Means ‘I miss you’.” Is he melting? Liquifying into a disgusting puddle beneath your prying palms, soaking into the bed sheets. You lament over his absence, spitting such pure genuine inflections that Toji is inclined to believe you when you tell him just how much you missed his unlawful presence. Like a stray dog that you offhandedly feed every now and again, praying for its safe and soon return back on your doorstep, digging into the leftover scraps of meat you’ve so kindly plated on the stoop. He’s that washed-up, flea ridden, unabashedly feral mutt that can’t help but crawl back to the idea of home. “I missed you. A lot.”
Toji doesn’t think you’ve ever sounded so vulnerable. Not even in the throes of passion when he’d had you spread and wet for him did you sound like this. Small and volatile, yet self-assured all the same. How the fuck do you manage to balance such contrasting notions? A witch, you must be something of the sort. 
There’s a gap of longing silence that fills the room; Toji concludes that you wait for him to return the gesture. So he does, “I did, too.” It’s the cold, hard truth, and he gives it to you on a silver platter. “Thought about you.”
And he’d leave that there. It was a much sweeter sentiment than to admit that he thought about you particularly often in those bloody showers with his hand wrenched around his hard on. Leaves much room for you to wonder. 
You hum. 
More quiet. He is fond of the quiet moments with you. 
“This looks fresh.” Ruined peace. He feels your thumb pad prod ever so gently at the teared flesh of his pec, the same one you used as your own personal pillow. It was inflamed, red and angry unlike the plethora of other battle scars which have now faded into a cooler pinkish tone with time. You were right; it was new. Nothing but a little switchblade slash—one of the men Toji had decimated this past week was armed. It was a careless mistake, one that had no real impact or effect, Hell, he barely felt the paper cut. But it impacted you, he noticed. “Does it hurt?” A fingertip whispers over the wound, and he flinches. 
Not because it’s painful, but because your gingerness made him sick to his stomach. Never more than in this moment did Toji feel so guilty for accepting your tender touches, wishing to holy Hell his conscience would allow him to bite his tongue. To let you keep thinking of him as some down-on-his-luck middle aged man with a shit job and no money to his name. 
“Don’t touch,” it’s quick, the way he snatching your wrist. Sturdy bone crushed under the bruising grip of his shaky fist. He didn’t mean to grab you so roughly. You’re taken aback by the outburst. 
“I’m sorry.” It’s a meager apology that doesn’t sound right spilling from your lips. It’s trembly and skittish, and your eyes widen coquettishly to flit between his face and the iron-clad grip that joins you together. “I’m—I should’ve asked you first.”
His breathing pattern was off its axis. Shit, shit what is he doing? Toji let’s go, flinching his hand far from your arm like you burned him. He shakes his head. “Didn’t mean to grab you, I didn’t mean to.” Toji pushes up from the warmth of your bed—from the warmth of you—and scans the floor for his boxers. 
You reluctantly part from him, gathering the blanket up over your chest as a makeshift barrier between bare flesh and the chilled air-conditioned bedroom. “What are you doing, Toji?” You sound sad. He finds his boxers. They’re balled up, discarded on the far end of your too-fucking-gigantic bedroom. “Toji!”
He keeps his back toward you, mechanically stepping into his underwear and dragging them up over his hips. It’s fucking gross, feeling the crunch of dried semen as the fabric contorts, but it’s ultimately ignored. “Thanks for dinner, you’re a fuckin’ A chef.” Toji spots his sweatpants nearby. 
“You got that new cut at work.” You’ve made a power move to ditch the comforter, stepping down into the carpet wearing nothing but your birthday suit. The tone of yours shifts, a steep incline from sweet and patient to demanding and accusatory, and Toji doesn’t like that one fucking bit. His sweatpants on, he tosses you a glance over his shoulder. 
“It was an accident.”
“Is that right?” Your brows furrow, gesturing to his torso. His marred, battered, abused torso. “Just covered in accidents then?”
Now he faces you, looks you in the eyes despite your naked form. “Pretty much.” Each lie tastes acidic, like that soupy bile he spits out before vomiting. “Thanks for dinner.” He makes an attempt to stalk past to the door, foregoing the shirt because he couldn’t give less of a fuck about it. Probably lost in a forgotten corner of your room, and with the way his heart raced against his rib cage, Toji wasn’t sure he’d survive long enough in this stuffy room to find it. So he thanks you again with an air of finality, only to be stopped. Your hand is flat against the center of his chest, pressed over the beat of his heart. No doubt about it, he’s sure you can feel that manic tempo. 
Beat, beat, beat. 
“I really thought we were getting somewhere.” You start quietly, voice hovering just above a whisper. His eyes stay fixed on the tiny hand that has glued itself to his sternum. “I thought we… I thought… I don’t fucking know, okay?
I like you. I like you so much, Toji.”
I like you too. “I…” like you I like you I like you. 
“Don’t feel like you have to reciprocate anything. These are complicated feelings, I know that. It’s a lot to spring on a person, but it’s the truth. I’m giving you my truth, and I need you to do the same because I don’t know if I can take another week of you disappearing for however long only to return like… like this!” You gesture to the red gash. “I care about you, and I want to help you. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, but you make it so fucking difficult.”
It felt as though every saliva particle had been vacuumed out of his mouth, leaving a dry desert plain for a tongue. He's never been so at a loss for words before, you actually rendered him speechless. Finally, finally, after a minute of gaping like a stupid fish out of water, Toji finds his bearings. 
“You’re a good person, Y/n.” He peels your hand off him. “And I’m not.” Toji moves to disconnect hands, but yours follows him, clamping them back together. He can’t find the strength to let go, knowing good and well that his palm was clammy as shit. 
Your brows pinch, knitting with confusion at the seemingly random proclamation. “I mean, sure you can be kind of a dick sometimes, but I don’t think—”
You don’t understand. So unscathed by the bleakness of this world, your definition of a bad person is someone who’s ’kind of a dick sometimes.’ Toji’s frown deepens, and he shakes his head, bangs bouncing with the movement. Your fancy conditioner made his hair feel soft against his forehead. “That’s surface level shit. You don’t understand what I’ve done.” 
“So tell me—”
“I can’t.” The word cracks in his throat, and he coughs around it. Choking on it like he did your pretty fingers in the kitchen. “Don’t you get that? If it was that easy…”
“Tell me.” Your voice grows calm, yet stern. Aggressive in the gentlest of ways, coaxing the truth to light. Arms crossed over your bosom, you jut a chin in Toji’s direction. “Because I’m really sick and fucking tired of you treating me like I’m incapable of comprehension. I’ll understand.”
You won’t. He knows you won’t. 
Time grows slow and thick like molasses; Toji feels caught in the midst of an unwinnable battle. Either direction he takes—to come clean, to dance around the truth some more, to lie—will only serve to worsen things to an unfortunate degree. He stalls. Scratches at his jagged jaw dusted with faint stubble. Then, he paws over the masculine plates of his abdomen, feeling his own flesh. There isn’t any warmth to him anymore. Every ounce of humanity had leaked from Toji’s soul, leaving him to become this cold, withering husk of a man. 
When his mouth finally peels open, it takes effort. Like his teeth had been welded together by one of those chewy caramel-coated candies Shiu keeps in his glove compartment. 
“I’m a killer.”
A strange sensation splashed over Toji. Maybe it was relieving to finally share that tidbit of himself, to get his shame out in the open and off his chest. His shoulders felt a little lighter, his joints felt a little looser. This high didn’t last forever, though, and soon he was plummeting back down to Earth when your horror-stricken voice shook in his ears. 
“That’s not a funny joke.”
“Wouldn’t joke. Not about that.” He swirls the built-up saliva in his mouth.
Your eyes were wide, never leaving him. “You… you kill people? For money?”
Begrudgingly, “yes.”
You sputter. “How do you expect me to believe something so—so unimaginable?” Your brows sewed themselves, drawn close in absolute bewilderment. Hinging on the cusp between puking and laughing in his stupid face. “This is insane, Toji.”
He scoffs quietly. “Ain’t fuckin’ lying woman.” No saccharine ma’am. “Wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I had to fight to live.” A low blow, but you didn’t seem to take it to heart, far too distracted by your own disturb. 
Toji wasn’t prepared for how much this was going to hurt. The disgusted way you looked at him, something you’d never ever done before, made him barely able to contain his quiver. He deserves every morsel of your animosity, but knowing he deserved it didn’t make it any less painful. Toji felt you scanning, analyzing every scar wedged into his torso. His arms. His neck. His face. He sees you making connections, noticing healed-over bullet wounds and knife attacks for what they were: hideous. He watches you make connections, visualizing a new scenario for each scar; for each life he’s taken and how they desperately fought back against him for mercy. Toji’s body bears the story of hundreds of deaths, and you look sick to your stomach at the realization of what he truly is. 
An ugly monster. 
“Oh my God.” You’re hushed, speaking to yourself. “How many people, Toji?”
He grimaced. “I lost count.”
“Oh my God…” Your hand is pressed to your hairline, and you look exasperated to all Hell. Crazed, maybe. As though he’d just rocked your entire world.
Toji interjects with unnecessary commentary. “I told you. I said you would never understand.”
“No, n-no I understand plenty.” Then, you smile, but it’s not one you’d ever bore to Toji before. It lacks any kindness. It’s empty and unloving. “You’re a murderer.”
He winces. Killer and murderer were synonymous, but for some odd reason being called a murderer was a different type of wrench to the gut. “Yeah.” Toji nods. For the right price, he has slaughtered, fucked, and even sold a few peripheral organs. Because money is everything. Money is food. Money is shelter. Money is life itself. But money isn’t you. 
“Get the fuck out of my home.”
You look terrified of him. Toji is frozen stiff.
“I said go! Fucking leave!” Suddenly, you're rushing to collect your crumpled outfit from the floor, feeding your limbs through the small pair of panties and that oversize bed shirt. Amongst the frenzy to get dressed, you snatch your phone from the bedside table and frantically scrawl over the screen with clumsy fingers. Toji sees tears track down your cheeks, they glint from the light emanating off the cellphone. “Or I’ll call the police.”
And turn in what evidence? He’s too good at what he does, Toji doesn’t leave paper trails behind. But he lets you think you have the power to get him in cuffs. You’re already so frightened, clinging to your phone with trembling hands.
“Go ahead. Call them.” His words are lifeless. Lifeless with a touch of irritation. Spat with malice because you would never understand the life he lives, despite how much you’ve preached to him that you would. You teased him, dangling this idea of a normal life in front of his face. One without lies and secrecy, just you and him and this almighty penthouse. This would more than likely be the last exchange between the both of you, the last time Toji would ever look you in the eyes again, and it angered him. All good things have expiration dates. “You know where I live.”
“Just… Fucking leave.” Christ, you were shaking like a leaf. Was it out of fear? Or anger, maybe? Probably a combination of both. Toji gets a few more seconds of stillness in, spent entirely on gulping down eyefuls of you. Even now, face twisted up and cheeks wet from tears, you look so fucking gorgeous. His savior, the one who showed him how to feel again. 
“Okay.” 
He collects himself, puts on a presence of nonchalant coolness. Like walking out of your bedroom wasn’t the most difficult thing he’s had to do in years. Never-minding the shirt, he walks to the door without sparing a glance back over his shoulder. 
Toji leaves. It’s raining, and he is shirtless and sopping wet. Thunder rumbles. 
You will hear thunder and remember me. 
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rayaswrittings · 9 months
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Face toward the sunset
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Summary: You and your boyfriend had just gotten back from his celebration, drunk and tired—but one thing you knew about Colby, was that he could never keep his hands off you when he was intoxicated.
Warning(s): Drunk!Colby, Mature language, Degradation, switch!dom!Colby, F!ngering, unprotected p in v, breeding kink, praise kink, male!recieving, bruising and marking, the whole nine really.
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It felt like you had been carrying thousand pound rocks on your back as you carried your drunken boyfriend through the house. You couldn’t see much and you were only trying to get back to your shared room. Colby was heavy on his feet due to his drowsiness and of course was much more heavy then you.
Colby always got drunk but never blacked out, although Tonight was the celebration for his and Sam’s youtube anniversary and he only let loose this one time. You had a few drinks yourself but you knew he’d end up like this so you paced yourself while he downed drinks like they were plain water.
You had just barely made it once you reached the entrance to your living room and practically pushed Colby onto your couch with a huff. He was laughing but you of course were not, being as you just carried him across the lawn. You made your way over to where you kept the food you had stored and pulled a few things out of the pantry, things that would make him some what full to hopefully sober him up a little.
You of course, wanted to go to sleep but Colby was never that easy when he was drunk. He’s far too touchy for you to even close your eyes without him doing something to wake you up. You poured juice into a small cup and set it on the end table, along with the fruits you were cutting for him to eat, but like always, that wouldn’t last long.
His giant arms snaked around your small frame from behind you and his warm body pressed up against yours, you could already feel the growing erection under his leather pants. He didn’t say anything, only leaning his head down to place sweet kisses to your neck as you continued to cut fruit.
“Go sit down, baby. I’m making you some food” Your free hand reaches back to touch his head but he only hums in response, continuing his movements from before. “Colby, please just eat this for me?” You turn to him once your finished and he’s already looking at you with those half lidded eyes, making your stomach explode with butterflies like you hadn’t seen it before. “Please?”
A smirk pulls at his lips as he walks toward you, pulling your body against his and capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. His touch was hungry against your skin, fingertips hard against your waist to hold you steady. You gave into him for a small second before pulling away, placing your finger over his lips.
“Eat this and you can get all the kisses you want, Okay?” He huffs but takes the plate from you, sitting down on the chair you had just added to your home. You walk over to where you put your basket of clothes by your laundry room, opening it to pull out a new top to fall asleep in since the one you had on was barely a shirt and quite uncomfortable.
You unclip the straps of the top you had on and let it fall to the ground, working to strap on the new and looser one you pulled out from the basket. After changing your top, you looked for a pair of shorts to slip into that also was loose, your tired eyes becoming far too lidded to think about anything other then sleep.
Just before you could slip into a new pair, the hungry hands your boyfriend possessed pulled you back, turning your body to face him all in under a second. You gasped at the sudden movement, realizing he had pulled you onto his lap while he sat in the chair. “Colbs, I barely have clothes o-“ Once again, he cut you off with a passionate kiss to your lips, wrapping his hand gently around your throat.
Of course you gave in under his grasp like you always did, his lips tasted of the fruit you had given him before and it only drew you more in then you had been already.
But as soon as you felt his tongue slip past your lips, you quickly pulled away.
“Not tonight, colb. Your drunk” You try to reason but he isn’t listening. The two of you had already talked about things like this and while you knew sober him wouldn’t care if you had sex, you still didn’t know if you were completely sure about that. “Let’s just go to sleep-“
“You said as many kisses as I want, didn’t you?” He raises an eyebrow while mocking your words, reaching up to stroke your hair with his gentle fingertips. “Looked so beautiful tonight, can’t believe your all mine” His strong arms pull you close to him so his face stuffed between the crook of your neck, taking in your sweet smell through his nose.
Your cheeks grow hot as you watch his face nuzzling against your body like a cat would do to its owner. You giggled at his movements but he didn’t care, only continuing his actions from before. Your hands combed his messy hair with care, twisting it around your fingers as you hug his head close to you. Colby was always touchy when he was drunk. He needed to be under your skin, only able to smell your scent as he slept.
“Colby!” Your body jolts at the sudden sensation between your legs, his hand that was once laid on your back, was pressed against your cunt. “Colbs, I don’t need-“ His lips are practically attacking your neck with the most passionate and wet kisses you could imagine, a sigh leaving your mouth as you felt the pleasure fill areas you shouldn’t have. When Colby was drunk, he gets extremely horny and practically will eat you alive if you don’t give yourself to him. For some reason your boyfriends hormones are much worse when he’s intoxicated.
He didn’t even need you to please him, he only ever wanted to please you. It was weird because you’d think it was the other way around but not with him. His thumb was pressing against your clit with care, rubbing circles to it while his tongue glides against your skin. His lips brush your ear softly before taking its lobe between his teeth, gently pulling it with a chuckle. “So easy, My love” Your ears flick at his hot breath against you, watching as he pulled his fingers back up between your faces to show you the mess you left covering them.
You watch as he slips his fingers into his mouth one at a time, cleaning them from your sweet slick. His free arm snakes around your waist swiftly, and his face leans up to meet your own in a sweet kiss, leaning his large body against your own to guide you to lay on your back to which you quickly oblige.
“Good girl” He praises with a smirk, trailing kisses down your neck till he got to your bra. “Let’s get this out of the way, yeah?” You hum, pushing his hair out of his face as he unclips the piece of clothing, eyes gluing to your chest. “You are so breathtakingly beautiful, baby. So beautiful” A small laugh leaves your mouth as your cheeks flush at his repeated and slurred soft words and a moan coaxes your throat as he swirls his tongue around your hardened nipple, kneading the other one between his fingers.
When you and Colby first started dating, you were so insecure about your body for months but now? You didn’t have time to be insecure because he quite literally worshiped your body. He’d place kisses on every spot you hated, and remind you constantly throughout the days how beautiful you looked, especially when you woke up in the morning. He made sure to remind you hourly.
“Always getting what you want, huh?” You huff as he pulls away from your chest with a chuckle, and moving down your bare body. His big hands cup under your thighs and push your legs apart, bending your knees back so your heels were laying against his shoulders. His eyes were strained to yours as his thumb circled your clit, watching your face twist in pleasure. It was a guilty pleasure of yours, honestly. Colby went down on you almost everytime you had been stressed or angry, and you love every second his mouth is attached to your forbidden area. He knew your body inside and out, and it was practically impossible for him to contain himself.
A small but quiet gasp catches in your throat abruptly and you let your head quickly fall back, Colby’s eyes still set on you while he sunk his middle finger inside you with ease. “Thought you didn’t need it?” He teases but your too in awe to care, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth.
“Stop being a tease, Colby” you tell him seriously, a smirk pulling at his lips once his name left your mouth. His face lowered toward your center, curling his finger against the soft walls of your insides as the tip of his tongue touched your clit gently. “Come on, Colbs” Your hand is already on its way to his head before you could realize, and you let your fingers roam his soft hair.
He didn’t know if it was just the alcohol or something but you looked so pretty in this light. Of course you always did, but something about tonight was different. You were impatient and whining like a brat but he loved it, he loved making you suffer knowing he was going to make up for it by the end of the night with you under him, begging for more of him.
You let out a semi loud moan once his lips closed around your clit, another one of his fingers slipping into you unannounced. “Fuck” Random curse words were leaving your mouth just to help silence your horribly loud moans, holding your boyfriend’s head close to your body as he devoured every last bit of you. To say you were in love with him was an understatement.
His long fingers were just enough to brush your cervix and Colby always took advantage of that, gently pushing you over the edge till you had been trembling under him. He sucked harshly against your clit as your heels dug against his shoulders, choked out moans escaping past your lips.
Your sweet sounds were music to his ears and he couldn’t help but grind himself against the couch under him, his free hand palming his still growing erection. Your hips wind against his face without your control but he doesn’t mind it, it only made him harder watching you struggle the way you were.
“Baby… Colby please” You beg, almost screaming if he didn’t get you there soon. He never stopped the degrading movement he had against your cunt, letting you do the rest in connecting the two of you.
Your pleasure fills his own body hot and fast, and Colby found himself palming himself harder then before, speeding up his movements against you. He wanted to take his time but you both knew drunken sex was a fast experience out of pure lust, you wouldn’t even know you were done till you laid atop his chest at the end of the night.
“Colby…!” His name rolls off your tongue with ease since you don’t hold back, fingers clasping around his hair as your back pushed off the couch, crying out to your overstimulated clit while you continued to release against him. Colby was flush against you, not pulling away until he was sure he had enough of your sweet taste.
Finally, he lifts his head and pulls his fingers from you, watching as your release drip down them with a chuckle. “Your bad, baby” Your able to see his full face now and you can’t help but giggle, watching closely as he hovered back over you.
“you look good with a beard” You tease, wiping off the remaining release on his chin and around his mouth. You lean up to his lips, brushing them against your own. You could feel his heart beating out of his chest as you move to his ear, letting your hand travel down between the two of you. His eyes widened once your hand wrapped around his painfully hard cock, practically holding back a whimper that threatened in the back of his throat. “Aw, baby… your practically suffering” You could feel the small beads of pre that left his tip urgently, placing soft kisses against his jaw. “However you want it, Mr. Brock”
His eyebrows raise at that name and he almost instantly pulls your face in front of his own, capturing your soft lips in a rough and wet kiss. Your free hand untied his pants before traveling up his back, leaving light scratches against his pale skin. “Want you to ride me” He confesses against your lips and you couldn’t help but smirk, pushing against his stomach gently.
“The balcony” you mumble and his eyes fill with complete love as he lifts you up in his arms, carrying you out of your house and to the big ledge that was connected to your room. You even had a whole bed out there for when the two of you fell asleep watching the sunset. Plus, who wouldn’t want to make love while watching the sunset? Thank god your house was in the darker part, away from everyone else’s.
You watch as Colby sits on the bed you had out there and your eyes catch a glimpse of the beautiful contrasted sunset, a smile appearing on your lips. Colby’s eyes were burning holes against your body, mesmerized in how perfectly your shape shadowed from the sun in front of you. It captured every curve, every freckle that was slowly becoming more visible against your skin, he could fall in love with you time and time again if he kept looking at you like this.
Your attention is fully turned to your boyfriends body, eyes taking in the beautiful man in front of you. His legs were slightly open and his cock sat pretty against his stomach, the sun capturing the shapes of his abs perfectly. His arms laid calm next to his body but you could tell he was getting impatient, shifting every so often which made you giggle under your breath.
You let your knees softly hit the ground before crawling towards him, running your fingernails gently across his thighs till you were sitting right in front of his erection. It was clear he wanted to jump straight into sex and as much as you did too, you wanted to take care of him first, even the playing field a little bit.
“Your evil” His head is spinning from his drunken state and he’s becoming desperate as your grab hold of his length, stroking it ever so slowly with your eyes examining its every vein and shade of white. A lot of woman wouldn’t be so obsessed with this part of their men but not you. Colby’s body was your fortress, one only you could open and make your own.
“Such a pretty cock, baby” The words are hushed into a whisper but his ears fall back and so does his head, butterflies filling his stomach. He wasn’t the only one with a praise kink. His tip was a shade lighter then the rest of his length but wasn’t light, and the width it portrayed made it hard for you to close your small hand around it. “Just hold on a little longer, handsome. Gonna make you feel so good”
His eyes squeeze shut once he feels your tongue glide against his tip, collecting the pre that was still escaping from him. Your tongue is exploring every inch on his length in under a minute, and you can clearly see he was barely holding on above you. His moans were hoarse and grunted, trying his hardest to conceal himself since you had been basically outside.
“Fuck, Y/N. I’m gonna come if you don’t—shit!” His body jerks and your eyes meet his, watching his reaction as his balls meet your palm, his cock still buried deep in your mouth like you had something to prove. You knew he wasn’t going to last and that’s exactly what you wanted, you wanted him to feel what you did. “You know I won’t beg you, Y/N but-“
His words only make you speed up your movements, chasing after his high. You could feel him pulsing in your mouth, and his hand reached down to hold the side of your head, more of in a comforting way then pushing you down. He was far too drunk to even argue with you, he just wanted to be inside you now.
And soon enough, he came undone with the loudest whimpers you had ever heard him let out, painting your tongue with the hot spurts of his release. His chest heaved horribly as you pulled away from his length with a pop, his eyes retracing back to your own watching you swallow its remains.
His cock was still painfully hard but you didn’t waste any time on that, moving up on the bed so you’d hover over him, allowing him to capture your lips against his. “Such a perfect little slut for me” He hums, noticing a small bit of his release was still on your cheek. He wipes it with his thumb, sinking it past your lips with a chuckle.
Colby’s large hands slowly slip over your bare hips, waiting for you to sink down on him. His head was between your neck now, attacking it with wet hickeys you knew would leave a mark the next day, a moan slipping from your mouth as his fingers tighten around your skin.
“Come on, pretty girl. I’ve got you” He reassures, taking one side of your butt in his hand, squeezing the pillowed skin as your hands find his shoulders for balance, his tip pressing against your very wet slit. You hold his head against you, letting out a shaky breath as you sunk down on him with ease, that familiar full feeling you were so fond of. Your boyfriend hums in approval and in full pleasure, messaging your skin gently till your body met his and you were fully sat on his lap.
His tip was already brushed against your cervix without even moving, and your walls couldn’t help but clamp over him every other minute. “Oh my god, Colby” you pull his hair back as you lift your hips with the help of his hands, watching his eyes fall onto your own.
“That’s it, just like that” Your bodies become so close once you start, faces barely even an inch apart but you didn’t kiss, you wanted him to watch you. He reached undeniable heights inside you, bruising up your skin just to help you move your hips. “My good girl—fuck, you do it so good”
Soon your movements sped up quickly, and holding onto his shoulders didn’t help at all, you had to place both hands on the wall behind him just to gain stability. Your boyfriend watches you in awe, as if it was his first time seeing you this way. Your hips grind against him the way he loved while your head fell back into the air, the both of you becoming slightly sweaty already.
Drunk sex always felt way too good but usually it was faster and much sweatier, this felt far too different. Even if your hips moved fast against his, it still felt like everything had been in slow motion. The way his hands held your delicate body in his embrace as he thrust his hips up to meet your own, how his lips parted in anticipation to kiss yours, Colby was so hungry for you—his body, was hungry for you.
“Gonna come, Pretty girl?” As if your whimper wasn’t enough to confirm his question, the way your hips moved way faster against his with your walls effortlessly clenching around him was definitely enough. Your body was calling for release and he could see that, coaching you through it with the simplest of words.
His hand leaves your hip and attaches itself around your neck, pulling you down to his face so your lips would crash into each others. His tongue instantly slipped into your mouth through your moans, holding your hips down so he could hit your deepest areas. Your high was approaching fast and he could feel it corrupting you, sitting up with you in his arms so you were literally sitting in his lap.
Your arms wrap around his neck and you can’t help but pull away from your boyfriend, throwing your head back as you rode him faster then before, nails digging against the skin on his chest. “Colb- fuck!” Your whimpers and moans are only motivating him more, the friction between the two of you was almost unbearable.
His large hand cups the side of your face and all that can be heard is the sound of skin slapping against another, your moans echoing the forest like a mockingjay’s song. “Come for me, dirty girl. Talk to me, Baby” His voice is husky against your ear and it makes your body completely feral, leaning your sweaty forehead against your boyfriends when you feel the pit grow in your stomach.
“Oh, Colbs” You moan breathlessly against his face, pushing his hair away from his eyes to look at him. “I love you, I love you, I love you, I-“ He ceases your rambling with a sweet kiss to your lips, reaching down to rub your clit between the two of your bodies.
“I love you far more, My good girl” He hums against you and watches as your eyes roll back, you were so close—just barely tipped over the edge. “Now come for me so I can turn you over and fuck you like you’ve been wanting for the past week” With only a few last circles against your clit and strokes to your dripping cunt, you came undone harshly against his body, gripping onto his shoulders as you let out the most beautiful cries he’d ever heard.
Your body shutters against his and all that could be heard now was the breathing between you two, his hands reaching up to caress your face gently. “Fucking hell, what alcohol did we drink” He chuckles, kissing the tip of your nose.
Both of your eyes traveled down between the two of you, noticing the puddle of liquid you had left on your boyfriend’s abdomen. You always got so embarrassed but he found it so attractive, he wanted you to give him that validation.
“Hands and knees, Face toward the sunset” You slowly remove yourself from your boyfriend, turning your semi-weak body toward the orange sunset, doing exactly as he requested. You had no idea how you were so worn out but the feeling of his hands against your back were enough to bring you back to reality. “That’s it. M’gonna sort you out baby, don’t worry” His voice is low behind you as he pushes his length against your slick, coating it in more of you.
“Your teasing…” you push back against him eagerly, earning a small chuckle from his lips as he leaned down, hovering his body over your own. His hands lingered over your body as he placed soft kisses along your shoulder before moving to your ear, taking it between his teeth. His body was so warm against yours and you could feel yourself getting hot all over again, leaning into his touch.
“If you don’t like my teasing, why are you moaning?” He questions cockily in your ear and you roll your eyes, pushing your arms out in front of you so your back was fully arched for him. The boy chuckled, pulling your hair away from your now fully exposed neck so he could access it, his free hand reaching down to line himself up with your slit. “Keep doing that, and you’ll wake up pregnant” You hum against the bed with a smile, Oh how much you wanted that.
“What if i wanted that?” His large hand clamps over your mouth as he continued to place kisses along your body, ignoring what you had just said. You were both drunk but he was sober enough to know this was just your alcohol talking.
“Ask me when your sober, My love” Some of his words are slurred but he speaks all the truth, removing his hand from your mouth and to your neck, tilting your head till he could kiss your lips.
Your breath is taken from you when you feel him slip into you all at once, and you quickly pull away from him with a gasp and your fingers squeezing the cloth under you. “Your so… fuck—your annoying!” He chuckles, reaching down to pull your hips closer to his own, already stroking you at a steady pace.
Your body moves with every slow and passionate thrust, and a soft moan comes out with it. Colby is loving above you, whispering sweet nothings into your ear with that husked accent of his. “I’ve been thinking about this all. Fucking. Week” His breath his hot against your neck as he speaks, you could feel the sweat between you two and the heat you both shared against your connected bodies.
Usually, the two of you would have a date night on Tuesday’s every week but this week was so hectic you didn’t have any time to do so. You and Colby would spend the night just holding each other, loving each other. Without date night, you two didn’t have any time to yourselves other then when you’d go to bed.
“Then why are you going easy on me? You know I love it when your rough” You know your words will tease him in a way he’d give in and that’s exactly why you said it. Usually the two of you would make love during sex, but you were so tired of that now. You wanted him to treat you like you were some random girl—a slut. “Lost your touch, pretty boy?”
“Lost my touch? What are you saying, Y/N” You could tell his words were with content and not worry, and you knew now that you had him right where you wanted him. “Are you saying I can’t fulfill your needs?” You giggle and push yourself into him even more, earning a small groan from his lips. “Dirty girl, you are playing a dangerous game”
“You know what I want, Colbs. So give it to me” His hand is clasp around your neck, tilting your head back till you could look at him with those big doe eyes you loved to tease him with. “That’s all you want, right? To please me?” Your eyelashes bat at him without your control, watching as his eyes slowly turned into voids. You had him now.
He didn’t even have to speak, only staring into your eyes as he pulled out of you, pushing back in with force and intent. Your eyes roll back and your body jerks up with every thrust he sends you, ten times harder them before. Your hands reach back to hold onto him but it only pisses him off, grabbing your wrists to cling together in front of you. His body was practically inside your own, laying on top of you while pinning your hands.
Your moans were much, much louder now and you couldn’t control them. He was hitting every little area in your body, one’s you didn’t even know you had. His cock wasn’t just kissing your sweet spot, it felt like it was the easiest spot for him to access and everytime he’d hit it, your body would shake under his. “This is what you wanted, right? Me to fuck you like your some whore? Ha. Can’t believe you said I lost my touch” He chuckled in your ear, biting the soft skin of your shoulder. You were begging now, so fucking desperate for him.
“Yes! Fuck, this is what I wanted. Wanted you to fuck me how you used to!” How he used to? Great mother you should’ve never said that.
“How I used to?” Of course your words make him rethink and come back ten times harder, lifting his torso from you to pull your hands behind your back, earning the loudest whimper from you. “That’s okay, my love. I’ll give everything to you now, and don’t even think about coming till I say so” there he was, your teenage fever.
It looked inhumane the way he was treating your body. From the way his hips snapped into yours, to how he held your hands right behind your back, and how he pushed your face into the bed to muffle your very loud moans. But it all felt way too good, this is exactly what you wanted and you knew he was the only man who could fulfill it. You never wanted him to stop.
“Right there! Right fucking—oh my god” You were so close to your edge it was torture. You were practically begging him to let you come before you had to, you knew you couldn’t hold it much longer. “Colby, I can’t… I’m— fuck!”
“You better hold it” He threatens, pushing your arch deeper. You let out a cry and his boyfriend reaction was more then enough to slow down, reaching down to your neck to pull you up against his body. Your head fell lazily against his chest but your reassuring eyes told him everything he needed to know. “Safe word, pretty girl?” You shook your head and grabbed his, pulling his face against yours in a rough kiss. He wasn’t hurting you, he could never hurt you.
“I need it, Colbs. Please just give it to me” From the second his teeth sunk into the delicate skin of your neck, to when he started to send slow strokes to your body, you felt yourself lose control and the only thing keeping you up was his hand wrapped around your stomach. You couldn’t take it, the pleasure was far too much.
He can feel your undeniable orgasm approaching and so was his, and at this point he couldn’t hold back anymore. His teeth remove from your skin, tongue swiping over any blood that escaped from your neck with his heavy breath beside you. “Look at you, taking my cock so well. Fuck, m’gonna come… want you to come with me. Can you do that for me?” You nod desperately, moving your hips against his to meet his rough strokes. “Touch yourself”
Your limp body is heavy in his arms as you reach down, rubbing circles against your clit at the same speed of his thrusts. Your moans and begs only grew louder, and Colby was on his very edge. “Doing so good for me—Come, pretty girl. I’m right behind you!” His coaching words make you cry aloud, holding onto his body for support as you felt your orgasm slowly tipping over its end, rubbing your clit. faster to chase that high. “Just one more, baby. Need you to come so I can fill this pretty cunt nice and full just like you wanted”
“Colb—fuck, fuck fuck! I’m… Mmph! I’m coming!” He continues to coach you to it, and with one last snap of his hips and circle to your clit, you felt your body release it’s everything onto his. He shushes your loud scream while silencing his own grunts, fingers digging into your hips to pull you close, painting your gummy walls with his white, hot release.
All that was heard was your heavy breathing and the sounds of birds chirping in the air, and you soon found yourself collapsed next to each other on the bed. Your chests were heaving horribly, and the sweat that drip from your foreheads were now everywhere. You were so tired.
Colby turned to look at you, smirk pulling at his lips at the sight of all the marks and bruises he had put on your body—ones you enjoyed having to cover because he gave them.
“Watch the sunset with me?” Your eyebrows raise slightly and his face softens, a smile pulling at the corner of his lips. Ending the night like this was perfect. It was almost as if you had just gotten back from date night. He leans down gently to place his lips against your own, relishing in the taste of your sweet lips.
He lays back and places one of his arms above his forehead while opening his other for you, watching you with a smile as you cuddle your naked body over his. Your head is nuzzled between his neck and your legs are shuffled with his own, the light of the sunset reflecting off your skin. Colby grabbed the blanket from behind you and pulled it over you both, laying his large arm over you once you were comfortable.
“I’m still so fucking drunk” He sighs making you laugh while you drew imaginary shapes along his chest, leaning your head up to kiss his jaw. “We can sleep now” You roll your eyes with another laugh, imagining what it would’ve been like had you actually went to sleep when you told him to earlier.
“I love you, Pretty boy” You hum, hugging his torso. He looks down at your already relaxed body, leaning his face down to kiss your head.
“I love you way more, My beautiful girl”
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frederickkittens · 1 month
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Sweet Lolita through the years
Part 1: Late 90s-2005 (ish) “Oldschool”
Oldschool sweet is the first truly recognizable form of sweet Lolita
Though during the Oldschool era the substyles had far more crossover and less individual traits I think there’s just enough that you still label coords from the time. When most people think of Oldschool they think of a solid color main piece with lace topped otks and a rectangle headdress… but Oldschool is so much more than that.
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Oldschool in general was simpler, though some brands like Metamorphose Temps De Fille , Emily Temple Cute, and baby the stars shine bright were already making prints
Printed fabrics of fruits or florals were very common, but you did see a good amount of screen printed and appliquéd pieces coming out at the time too. Some very common sweet motifs in the oldschool era were:
•cats
•fruit
•alice in wonderland
•bunnies / rabbits
•bears
•alphabet / letter prints
•music notes
•hearts
The closer to the end of the identifiable oldschool era the more prints became popular! Though through most of the 2000’s prints would remain more minimal with the focus being on more structural elements like lace, bows, construction, and interesting fabric choices.
Due to the image limit on tumblr here’s a link to the correct sorting to see examples on lolibrary with examples of some early sweet prints and patterns. If you click the link on any of these items you’ll be able to view their lolibrary entries as well if available
Color balance wasn’t considered as highly as it is today, the overall vibe of Coords was more chaotic and experimental. A very make do attitude can be seen in many street snaps.
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Patterned main pieces were another popular alternative to prints, things like gingham, stripes, tartan/plaid.
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Bag choices were pretty varied, honestly in a lot of oldschool sweet coords people would use unique bags as the visual interest / focal point. You can already see that in someone of the coords above. Faux leather shaped bags like btssb’s heart bags weren’t very common yet. A few brands had put out heart bags, such as milk, but they were much simpler and often real leather in limited colors. You also didn’t see usakumyas in their modern iteration until well into the 2000’s towards the 2010’s. Plush bags of the era did not have the same clean marketable look. Some common / popular bags were:
-basket / wicker purses
-plush animal bags
-tote bags
-matching fabric bags
-leather handbags
-designer handbags
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Shoes at the time were much chunkier and much less cutesy even in sweet styles. Tea parties didn’t exist until a good deal past this time period- honestly most popular modern Lolita shoe styles weren’t really seen. Real leather was far more common, in a much more limited pallet. When you did see colored shoes they typically weren’t used to color balance a coord like we do now a days. A lot of different styles were worn though, including:
-Mary Jane’s
-Platforms
-Rocking horse shoes
-Boots
-Oxfords
-sandals
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Socks are often overlooked in oldschool. I’ve seen so many people say printed socks weren’t worn even though they absolutely were and many brands made them. Sure, lace topped otks were the trend and the most popular option but simple motif printed socks absolutely existed and were worn!
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Headpieces were one of the most varied category. So many different styles and kinds were worn.
-mini crowns
-hair ribbons
-hats
-bows
-canotiers
-mini hats
-lace headdresses
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Jewelry / Accessories were one area that Oldschool definitely was simpler. However brands were absolutely making both jewelry and other accessories. Plain metal necklaces with various motifs were common, lace chokers, faux collars, capes, ties, and though extremely uncommon you do sometimes run across wrist cuffs. Hopefully there’s more of an effort to start documenting jewelry and accessories from this time since it’s quite lacking
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Makeup and hair were something that like all eras of Lolita followed the over all cultural trends of the time. More minimal make or simple 90’s - early 2000’s makeup is seen often. As for hair there’s so many different styles that really it would be impossible to list them all. In older magazines there’s often sections with hair tutorials and makeup tutorials!
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Common lace styles included Torchon, Cotton, Eyelet, and Raschel. Many different trims and such were used in addition to these.
Part 2 and part 3
Scan credits @obscuredesireofbourgeoisie
If you want to see more old magazine scans
Lolita history
Internet archive
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gutouhua · 1 year
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pairing. zhongli x f. reader
wc. 2.7k+
rating. explicit
tags. sort of canonverse, zhongli has ruts & dragon fangs, reader hails from mondstat, mentions of mates/mating, mentions of eating animal meat, zhongli is a perv for reader, zhongli calls reader ‘pet,’ age gap (reader is early-mid 20s, zhongli is biologically in early 30s), mentions of zhongli’s previous sexual relationships (dubcon), power dynamics, cervixfucking, overstimulation (sort of), zhongli wants to breed reader, pussydrunk zhongli, unprotected sex (pull out method)
a/n. MDNI! see end for notes
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Zhongli had imagined it over a million times—taking you across the table and fucking your pussy. He knew you’d smell good down there, had scented it like a pervert in the days before your period—familiar lily mixed with strong musk and a tinge of metal. It made his fangs itch from the need to sink into your soft thighs and tongue at your slick folds.
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Zhongli rutted in early spring, when trees blossomed and bore fat fruit—juicy peaches hanging heavy on thin branches. Sometimes he’d walk by them and look at them with an almost forlorn gaze. A deep ache in his body.
He wished that there was someone who would satiate his needs like seeds did to trees or bees with flowers. They mated with each other, year after year in a frenzy—a haze of powdery yellow spilling on every surface of Liyue Harbor. Zhongli didn’t have allergies, but even if he did, he would still love and envy the pollen.
It had been a long time since Zhongli had someone like that to spend his seasons with. A mate.
He’d drink copious amounts of lily bulb tea each spring to keep himself from fucking the first person who said yes to him, and would take himself into his hands with a furious passion every morning and night—even during work breaks—to relieve himself.
And it worked. He successfully passed multiple centuries of ruts like so, although it wasn’t always easy. As Morax, he was volatile—could pass for the Pyro Archon herself, Murata, but he tempered himself over the years, learning to be the composed man he was now.
But then you appeared, and the fire flared. Hutao’s newest intern—the first in nearly a decade, fresh. A slight little creature (although most people were small compared to Zhongli), and eager to learn about funeral services from Liyue’s very best. It was the first time you’d been to Liyue, so far from your home in Mondstat, and everything and everyone interested you.
I wonder if there’s a way to breed two creatures together to create an actual cocogoat. It’d be cool—Qiqi would be able to drink actual cocogoat milk, not that cheap substitute that Baizhu makes for her, and we’d be able to eat the meat. It’d taste good, right?
Zhongli chuckled, eyes soft on you. That would be a sight to behold. He didn’t mention that he’d been alive when cocogoats still roamed the Bishui Plains—a story for another time.
And then came the questions about himself.
Why are you so red, Zhongli-xiangsheng?
His rut came early this year for some reason, but he didn’t pay much attention to it. The lily bulb tea would suffice until he had a moment for himself.
But you had to make it difficult. So difficult for him.
Nothing, he murmured.
You grinned, stepping closer on tiptoes so your eyes leveled his chest. Soft rise and fall—imperceptible unless face to face like you were.
It doesn’t seem like nothing to me, Xiangsheng.
Zhongli fought the urge to inhale your soft scent. Sweet, powdery like lilies and dusk and something tender he wanted to bite—
—And he tasted blood in his mouth to stop his fangs from descending onto your exposed neck, nearly shook from the force it took to not bend you over his desk.
It would leave a mess. And Hutao would add it to his tab.
Even now you tempted him with coy glances, a bare shoulder, and sometimes a lingering touch in the space between his cuff and gloves—sharp like the sting of the formidable Raiden’s electro bolts.
“Do you want to know what I learned today, Xiansheng?” You had taken to calling him that instead of his mortal name one day. Zhongli wasn’t quite sure why, but he liked how it sounded on your lips.
He smoothed an invisible wrinkle from his suit and shuffled the papers on his desk while shifting to hide the stiffness in his pants. “Pray, do tell.”
You leaned forward, settling your weight on the heavy oak table. “I heard you’re rutting right now.”
Zhongli nearly choked on his tea. “What?”
“Rut, heat, season—Hutao told me.” You shrugged as if the topic was something mundane. “She said you rut every spring, but that it’s unusually strong this year for some reason. Something about the aura around you, I think. Why’s that?”
Because of you.
“Not sure,” Zhongli said.
“She also told me about that tea you drink.”
He nearly dropped his cup of tea. Damn the woman. Spilling all my secrets. And there wasn’t a single thing he could do—he was on her payroll.
“What about it?” he asked, trying for confidence.
“Lily bulb tea,” you continued, scrutinizing his cup, “apparently it helps calm you down and dampens the urge to fuck.”
Zhongli’s dick hardened.
“So does it?”
“What?”
“The tea. Does it help with your urges?” You jerked your head at the drink, curious.
Not when you’re around.
Zhongli had imagined it over a million times—taking you across the table and fucking your pussy. He knew you’d smell good down there, had scented it like a pervert in the days before your period—familiar lily mixed with strong musk and a tinge of metal. It made his fangs itch from the need to sink into your soft thighs and tongue at your slick folds.
He wasn’t sure what to say, but finally decided on: “Not really.”
You cocked your head to the side and bit your lips, Zhongli’s eyes following the pink tongue that peeked through. He wanted to bite them too. They’d be soft and break easily with a little bit of teeth—like almond tofu.
“Oh. Then what’re you going to do about it?”
“The usual.” Tea, masturbating, some rough fucking. Archons knew he’d need it tonight—some sort of distraction from you. He’d have to visit Madame Fang for an escort. She was used to his proclivities—would have someone able to take him.
“The usual? And what would that be?” Zhongli could almost picture you with a pen and paper in hand, a student eager for information.
He groaned internally. Now he was imagining you in a short skirt, stockings, maybe thigh highs—the fat of your thighs spilling from the top of the elastic. The image nearly had him spilling in his pants.
“I don’t think you’d want to know the particulars,” he said, his voice a soft rasp. He shifted again. “It might scare an innocent little girl like you.”
“Innocent?” You huffed. “Little? I’m a grown adult xiangsheng! I’m over the legal age—and actually much more than that. You can hardly call me little or innocent.”
“But you are,” he said indulgently, as one would towards a spoiled pet. “I am immortal, have fought and survived the Archon War. Tell me, pet, can you say the same?”
He was playing with you. Of course the two of you knew you couldn’t compare to him.
“But at the very least, you cannot consider me innocent. I’ve experienced enough things,” you muttered, annoyed.
Zhongli arched an eyebrow.
Before you knew it, he grabbed your wrist, pushing you onto the desk in one fluid motion—papers scattering to the floor like spring pollen. Zhongli pinned your hands over your head to keep you in place, and knocked your legs apart to slot his large frame between you.
“W-What’re you doing, Zhongli?”
He smiled. And there it was: his name always slipped out when you got serious.
Xiansheng.
What?
Xiansheng. He moved closer, spreading your legs further apart as he drew closer to you. You could feel your stomach pressing tightly against the cotton of your suit with each breath, your chest straining against buttons. Don’t be so impolite when your boss is trying to school you.
Xiansheng.
Good girl, he rumbled. You were so curious about the specifics of my rut—what I do to satiate my needs. Shall I show you? They say firsthand experience is the best way to learn.
His voice was heavy, hot against your ear, and you nearly jumped out of your skin when he darted a tongue out to lick the delicate shell of your ear.
So sensitive. I wonder if it’s the same in other places. Shall we find out?
Hutao had ordered him to be careful with you—a family friend. Your family owned the most successful funeral parlor in Mondstat, and they sent you to Hutao to learn how she conducted her business in Liyue. Zhongli had agreed. He could keep his hands to himself.
But then you showed up on the steps of Wansheng funeral parlor, and he knew he was fucked.
Do you want it, he whispered, I need to rut, but I always ask for permission.
Jealousy reared its ugly head. He’d done it with others—for decades, maybe even centuries, and it made sense, you couldn’t expect celibacy from him and yet…the thought of other people touching him made you want to rake your hands down his back, gouge, and suck every inch of his skin so others would know he was taken.
That he was yours.
What will it be, pet?
You nodded, eyeing the bulge in his pants. He was big. It was obvious, and it’d probably hurt. A tight fit.
Zhongli smiled—sharp teeth, predatory. I need words.
Yes.
No sooner did you give your permission did he slip your blazer off your shoulders and loosen just enough buttons to push your blouse up and over your head. You wore cotton—a simple white bra, and he wondered if you wore a matching set today.
He didn’t have to wait long to find out: you were already unzipping your pants, sliding stiff fabric down your legs, uncaring if it wrinkled. You’d have to remember to take it to the cleaners.
But later—now, you canted your hips forward, not caring about anything but the man in front of you.
So needy, he murmured, and wet.
His scent intoxicated you, his weight a delicious pressure against your skin.
Zhongli rocked against your clothed pussy, pleased to find you wet. You soaked through the cotton fabric, leaving an imprint in the shape of your pussy on your panties.
Fuck me, xiangsheng, please—I need it.
The scent of your arousal grew stronger with each tap against the wet spot. Heady, mind-numbing, as if a drug was coursing through his bloodstream. The amber of his hands grew darker, a deep, gorgeous fossilized hue, and his pupils thinned—they slitted into a sharp, almost feline countenance, predator to prey.
You would have me? he asked again, stars pulsing in his eyes. In his earlier days, before he was an archon, he had taken people without knowing what it really meant. The shame and guilt of it had made the act feel dirty for a long time—he went nearly fifty years without a single partner to help him through his ruts.
He would not make the same mistake with you.
Just fuck me.
He groaned, pulled your panties to the side—white cotton—and pushed himself into you, the entire length. It was tight and it burned as you struggled, walls stretching to accommodate his dick.
Feels so good, he grunted, you’re so tight, fuck. He lost himself in your tight heat, centuries of manners and poise melting before you.
He moved slowly at first, dragging his length out so that nothing but the tip remained inside before thrusting back in.
You shifted backward, trying to adjust to him. Soft pants, shallow—eyes squeezed shut to focus on each heavy stroke in and out of your cunt. When you started moving against him, seeking friction for yourself, Zhongli sped up. Kept most of his cock inside you with each stroke, prodding around for your sweet spot.
When he finally found it, earning a cry and squeeze around his cock that nearly made him cum, he smiled. Right there, pet?
You gasped, struggled to answer: Yeah, yeah-right there—
He continued to thrust, imprinting your insides with the shape of his dick, hitting that sensitive spot with almost boyish eagerness, but it still wasn’t enough to—
—You reached down to where his dick is splitting you apart and try to rub your clit, the hard nub aching for attention, but Zhongli pushed your hand away.
Allow me.
You almost whine—denial twisting your stomach into a tight knot, leaving your clit wanting, but he didn’t make you wait long. Deft fingers rubbed circles on your clit, grinding, until it swelled enough for him to pinch, hard.
Zhongli, please—
What did I say pet, he hummed and bit your earlobe in admonishment.
Xian-Xiansheng—
You were begging now, pleading—tears dripping from your face like fresh paint on canvas.
Please, xiansheng, please, I need it.
What do you need? He thrust forward, the head almost kissing your cervix.
Need…
Need what? Use your words, pretty pet. Another hard thrust, this time he touched your cervix. Half pain, half pleasure. Lines slowly starting to blur—was it because of his dick or your tears? You couldn’t tell.
You shook your head and fisted your hands in the collar of his suit, wrinkling the fine material as you dragged his face towards you to claim a kiss. Harsh and unyielding, a faint taste of iron between each ragged breath. Now you’d have to take two suits to the cleaners.
Vaguely, in the back of your mind, you’d forgotten how you even got into this situation in the first place. Something about lily bulb tea, alone time…and ruts…heats. Heat—were you the one in heat or was it him?
But it didn’t matter, all you knew was that:
Need to cum.
Zhongli’s pretty lips curled. And so you shall.
With one hand on your hips, he slammed his hips against yours in a punishing rhythm while his other hand battered your clit, thick fingers flicking the hard nub repeatedly until you felt nearly numb from the overstimulation. He felt you tense beneath him, hips rolling incessantly, your cunt gripping him so tightly he knew he was close.
Cum for me, he demanded, almost growling, give it to me.
And you obeyed—gave yourself over to the pleasure, moaning from the waves of pleasure washing over you.
Zhongli groaned as you contracted around him, each tight draw from your pussy taking him closer to his own release. Hips stuttering, he felt his fangs slip through, throbbing from the desire to taste you, bite you, mark you—
—Breed you.
It was messy, each time he pulled back and saw the amount of slick that coated his cock, his mind grew fuzzier, almost stupid. Zhongli couldn’t remember the last time he felt pussydrunk—
You bit the side of his neck as another orgasm ripped out of you, and this time Zhongli let himself go with a harsh growl, pulling out right as he cummed, thick ropes of sticky cum defiling your stomach. It was dizzyingly maddening: his cum moving with each shaky exhale, dripping onto your pussy, and Zhongli thought it was such a waste that it wasn’t inside you, filling you up. Some of it covered your clit—a glistening pearl. He fought every fiber of his being to not bend down and lick it. He didn’t like sweet things, but you were an exception.
“Did you learn a lot?” he finally asked after your breath had steadied a bit.
You were still coming down from your high, barely able to form a coherent sentence. “What?”
“I was teaching you,” he chuckled, voice husky. “Were you a good student? Paying attention?”
You thought about it for a moment. Looked at his disheveled appearance, his golden eyes, the wrinkles in his suit, and found it lacking.
“Not enough.”
“I am in agreement.”
Hutao narrowed her eyes. “You fucked him.”
“And what if I did? It’s not like you’ll fire me,” you replied lightly.
Hutao groaned. “I knew you wanted to fuck him, but I didn’t think you wanted to do it that badly. It’s not exactly good for my business, and you know he’ll stick to you for the rest of his season, right? That’s how it works for him. He doesn’t share.”
“Well good. Because I don’t either.” You wouldn’t have chosen him anyway if he liked to share. “But wait—what do you mean ‘not exactly good for your business?’”
The Wangsheng Director grinned at you. “Look at him: one of the most eligible bachelors in Liyue. Didn’t you notice that we have a large number of young clients? They come to Wangsheng because of him. I don’t care who Zhongli fucks as long as they give me their money—it keeps my beloved Wangsheng as the most profitable funeral parlor in Liyue.”
“Of course you would say that.” You laughed and thought about all the times your parents praised Hutao. “No wonder my parents sent me here to learn from you.”
Hutao winked. “Of course! Making money is the second best thing I’m good at.”
“What’s the first?”
“Death.”
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uhhh i wrote this one about six-ish months ago too...been busy with zine work but hopefully when I'm done I can write more reader insert smut :') (also sorta tried a new style of dialogue lmao back when I wrote this)
Murata, also known as the God of War and the Lady of Fire, was a Pyro Archon and a member of The Seven who presided over Natlan.
先生 - xiānsheng. Has two main definitions: the first is teacher, the second is mister (Mr); gentleman; sir. Both suit Zhongli very well in this fic ;)
Dried lily bulb【百合】 is usually recommended in TCM (traditional Chinese medicine) clinics to treat coughs, dry throats and relieve heat. (But IRL, this doesn’t actually help with the horny feels LOL.) 
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Zhongli as Morax has darker brown/amber skin tone on arms, so I chose to depict this in the fic as skin darkening when aroused. I also put a photo of something similar on an actual body. 
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drvscarlett · 17 days
Text
About You Pt 15
Sebastian Vettel x Webber!Reader
Summary: Everyone knows about the history of Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber. But there's a well kept story within the paddock about Sebastian Vettel and another Webber. This is that story.
A/N: I have made the decision to extend this to a few more chapters so were about 5 chapters away from the real ending. This scene was inspired by that one scene in the Little Woman so brace yourself. Enjoy reading
About You Series
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2013, Interlagos
The amber glow of the candle-lit dinner and a live pianist has given a romantic ambiance for dinner night. People have their tables far apart from the other patrons so they could each have their privacy. This restaurant was a hot spot for those people who wanted an evening with their partner. In another lifetime, Sebastian would have been here toasting the night away with Y/N. They share their fun stories as the dinner progress, and they go home with smiles on their faces.
However, in this reality, Sebastian is sitting alone. He kept himself busy scanning the menu but his mind was elsewhere. Despite winning the championship, he was still looking uneasy. It shows in his posture just how tense he was.
Well, who could fault him anyways? Who wouldn’t be tense if they knew that Sebastian was waiting for a scorning from hell. He knew how this conversation can end up in and any scenario that he thinks of,it ends terribly. He wished he knew how to start the conversation but he finds himself at a total loss for words. There was no game plan. Even with all the communication officers or a ghostwriter to help him, his words will never be enough to warrant forgiveness.
The glass of water that was recently refilled mere moments ago is empty again but there is still a bitter taste in his mouth. He signaled for the waiter to fill his glass again. Then his focus goes back to watching his clock, watching how Y/N was running quite late from their agreed meeting time.
“Sorry sorry” A figure appeared behind Sebastian. Y/N obviously hurried to get there because of her heavy breathing and the sweat that glistened her skin.
Sebastian reached out to help Y/N with her chair. A pang of hurt seems to jolt down Sebastian when Y/N avoided his help and even his touch. He already anticipated that she would be distant but the reality still hurts. He quietly sat down as Y/N settled across him.
“Where you waiting for a long time?”Y/N asked
“It’s okay, I understand” Sebastian assured.
His eyes noticed the dark bags under her eyes and how her cheeks seem to thin out a little. It was quite concerning because they only stopped talking a few races ago so why did she deteriorate a lot already “Do you want to eat something? I can order you any food”
“Thank you but I actually don’t have an appetite to eat”Y/N politely declines, eyes still avoiding his.
“You look like it, you’re losing weight”Sebastian couldn’t help but point it out. “Please eat something even oranges”
Y/N’s eyes skimmed the menu and it made her raise an eyebrow. The menu were boasting of some soup of the day, a main course that she cannot pronounce, and some French dessert. No mentions of the favorite fruit that they both like.
“I don’t think they have it here”she replied.
“I can ask for it”Sebastian offered “Do you want me to get-“
“Seb, I didn’t come here for us to dine”
It was the first time that Y/N had the courage to look at Sebastian’s eyes. There was an immediate communication of the feelings that they have been keeping up within their sleeves. Y/N was filled with confusion, betrayal, and hurt. Sebastian’s eyes were of desperation, shame, and sadness. The tension between them is so thick that it drones out the soft pianos of the night.
Sebastian reached out to hold her hand. He may have practiced this a lot before he went here, and he had so many scenarios that he wanted to play out in his mind but now he just decided to give Y/N the raw explanation.
No sugarcoating, no lying. Just the plain basic truth.
“I cheated on you Y/N when I was drunk. I was so upset and I drank beyond my limits then the next thing I know something happened between me and Hanna. It was a mistake. I never did that again, you have to believe me”Sebastian explained.
Before going to the restaurant, Y/N promised herself to not cry about it. She knows the truth already so it shouldn’t hurt her anymore. Tears were prickling her eyes and she was doing her best to maintain a straight face.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” her voice cracked. It betrayed her true feelings and Sebastian noticed that as his hands started to shake.
The way Sebastian buried his head in shame makes the answer clear as day. He was scared. She had to admit that she understood why Sebastian was scared but throughout the years that he had known her, didn’t it cross his mind to trust her with the truth? Didn’t he understand that it was better to be honest than to hide it?
“Why did you have to hide it and blindside me?”
“I didn’t mean to blindside you”Sebastian was quick to answer “I was going to tell you but I never got a good chance to tell you”
Y/N wanted to remove Sebastian’s hands away from her but then she felt his tears falling down their joint hands. For a moment, Y/N forgot everything that was happening and he just wanted Sebastian to stop crying. It was breaking her heart to see him so devastated.
“Listen, I was selfish and I hid the truth from you because I thought I still have more time. We’re just starting with our relationship and I didn’t want to mess this up because this is the best thing that happened to me. With everything going on, I lost a lot of people and I act like I don’t care about it but truth is I care. Its just that I’m okay to lose them but important people like you, I’m scared to lose”
Without a shadow of a doubt, everything being said was genuine. Y/N wish it could be just as simple as forgiving him but things are different now.
“It was all a mistake and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to prove to you that I am sorry”Sebastian begged.
“Seb, this isn’t that easy anymore” Y/N sighs. She knows that she needs to tell Sebastian the whole truth since he wouldn’t speak to Hanna. It was a cruel joke from the universe that she has to be the one to break it to him.
“We can work this out, please don’t give up on me”Sebastian contested.
“You’re going to have a kid Sebastian”
As soon as the words escaped her mouth, Sebastian’s hold on her hands loosen up. It was like someone dumped a cold water to the German driver. The gears seem to be turning up inside his head and Y/N knows that Sebastian understands why things can’t work as they hope for.
“Hanna is pregnant?” Sebastian slumped in his seat in disbelief.
Y/N nods, “I saw her in Abu Dhabi. She’s around 7 months pregnant right now and she needs you Sebastian”
Then she proceeds to take out the ultrasound photos and slide it across Sebastian. She knew Sebastian well that he is very fond of children and the evidence that there is a growing child that was his would sway him. A flicker of awe graced his face as he looks through the photos.
“That kid is yours Sebastian and you have a responsibility with Hanna to raise that child”Y/N reminded.
Her job here was done. She could text Hanna later that she no longer has to worry because Sebastian will take responsibility towards the kid. Y/N removes the ring, it was Sebastian’s after all. She gets up from the table and walks away before her heart shatters again.
It didn’t take long for Sebastian to follow her out to the streets.
“Where are you going? We haven’t fixed us yet?” Sebastian asked.
“Sebastian what you need to fix is your family. Hanna needs you right now. She is in a difficult position and you have a responsibility towards her. You have to be with her”Y/N repeated.
She wondered if she repeated it several times then maybe it won’t hurt anymore. However, the way Sebastian immediately held both of her hands and kissed it, is making it difficult to do such forgetting.
“But Y/N I don’t love her”
There it was. Those one-liners that Sebastian says crumbles every resolve that Y/N has. She might be a brave woman, but Sebastian knows just the right thing to say and she is defenseless.
“I don’t love her Y/N, I only love you” Sebastian restated “I will take responsibility for the kid but it doesn’t mean that I have to stop loving you”
Y/N didn’t know if Sebastian was just plain stupid or he was just a failed romantic. She let out a laugh as tears finally fall down her cheeks. She doesn’t care if passerbys might think of her as stupid but she cannot hold her emotions any longer.
“Sebastian, I will not allow myself to be the other woman that is the reason to have a destroyed family. I cannot do that to your child. Can’t you understand that?”Y/N frustratedly screams “I want you and I love you but I cannot be selfish because there is a child involved”
That was the thing about Y/N, she was always so selfless to the point that what she wants is irrelevant. Right now, all she cares about is that kid, that Hanna is carrying, gets a father. If she has to break up with Sebastian then so be it.
For the second time that night, she walks away from Sebastian.
“Don’t go” and Sebastian was not done chasing her. His hands were wrapped around her waist and she was trapped in a back hug. She could feel his face buried around her shoulders as he cries.
“Seb”
“We can work it out. I can be the father of the kid and I won’t run away from that responsibility. I’ll love that kid and I’ll support whatever he or she wants to become. I’ll coparent with Hanna” Sebastian reasons out “But my heart, its all yours. You are all I want and all I need”
Y/N closes her eyes as Sebastian turns her around. She fears that the moment she opens her eyes and look at Sebastian then it was game over. She would blindly agree to what Sebastian is suggesting. Knowing how stubborn and convincing Seb is, Y/N would be swayed. And of course, for the most damning reason, Y/N is truly and madly deeply in love with Sebastian.
“Please let’s just work things out. I will be a good father to the kid, and I will be a loyal partner to you. I will do my best, just give me a chance” Sebastian begged.
“Seb please, I can’t do this”
“I can give you time”Sebastian refuses to give up “If you can’t forgive me right now then I understand. I will work hard to earn your forgiveness. I will do my best to show you that I am still the man that you fell for. Please Y/N let me prove myself again to-“
“You need to listen to me Seb”
Their foreheads touching and they could only hear the sounds of car passing and their sniffling. Both of them were trying their best not to cry but it was really hard especially when they both think that this whole relationship is nearing its end.
“I love you Sebastian and I may be stupid because after everything I still love you”Y/N admits. There was a sliver of hope in Sebastian’s eyes. “And I love you enough that I will not let you be forced to choose. You have an upcoming kid and that kid needs your time and your love Seb. You may not love Hanna but that kid needs you. I need to let you go so you can be a good father to that kid.”
How did they end up this way? That’s all that was running in their minds. They would have been talking rings and building a family just months ago but now everything is all complicated. Both of them resigning their fact that they have to let go.
“If I had things figured out, would you still give me a chance?” and it was without any doubt, Y/N nodded in silence.
Sebastian’s warm hands slipped the cold ring back to her hand. It confused the woman why Sebastian had to give it back to her when the ring was from Sebastian’s mother to begin with. She believes that she doesn’t own that.
“Take the ring” Sebastian insisted “I want that ring to be a reminder that I’m going to figure out myself so that I can return as a better man to you. You deserve that ring because I made up my mind that you are the one that I love and you are the only one I want to marry in the future”
There were no people in sight except the two of them but the night sky and its twinkling stars served as their witness for that night. It was just the two of them with their prayers to the heaven or some higher being hoping that they could work things out.
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rayassecretlife · 1 year
Text
“My mate, you are playing a dangerous game”
Pairing: Aged up!Neteyam Sully x Fem!Omatikaya!Reader
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Summary: Neteyam can’t control himself around you, especially when he’s drunk.
Warning(s): Drunk!Neteyam, Mature language, Degradation, switch!dom!Neteyam, F!ngering, unprotected p in v, breeding kink, praise kink, male!recieving, bruising and marking, the whole nine really.
Not! Proof read! Sorry for mistakes.
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It felt like you had been carrying thousand pound rocks on your back as you carried your drunken husband through the forest. You couldn’t see much and you were only trying to get back to your shared cave. Neteyam was heavy on his feet due to his drowsiness and of course was much more heavy then you.
Neteyam never got drunk, really. Tonight was the celebration for his parents anniversary and he only let loose this one time. You had a few drinks yourself but you knew he’d end up like this so you paced yourself while he downed drinks like they were plain water.
You on the other hand, we’re also busy worrying about your daughter who was staying with your parents since Neteyam had completely shit faced himself. You trusted your mother with your life but you hated when your daughter was away from the two of you, without being in arms reach of her was something that made your skin crawl.
You had just barely made it once you reached the entrance to your cave and practically pushed Neteyam onto your hammock with a huff. He was laughing but you of course were not, being as you just carried him across the forest. You made your way over to where you kept the food you had stored and pulled a few things out of the basket, things that would make him some what full to hopefully sober him up a little.
You of course, wanted to go to sleep but Neteyam was never that easy when he was drunk. He’s far too touchy for you to even close your eyes without him doing something to wake you up. You poured juice into a small cup and set it on the stone ledge, along with the fruits you were cutting for him to eat, but like always, that wouldn’t last long.
His giant arms snaked around your small frame from behind you and his warm body pressed up against yours, you could already feel the growing erection under his loincloth. He didn’t say anything, only leaning his head down to place sweet kisses to your neck as you continued to cut fruit.
“Go sit down, baby. I’m making you some food” Your free hand reaches back to touch his head but he only hums in response, continuing his movements from before. “Neteyam, please just eat this for me?” You turn to him once your finished and he’s already looking at you with those half lidded eyes, making your stomach explode with butterflies like you hadn’t seen it before. “Please?”
A smirk pulls at his lips as he walks toward you, pulling your body against his and capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. His touch was hungry against your skin, fingertips hard against your waist to hold you steady. You gave into him for a small second before pulling away, placing your finger over his lips.
“Eat this and you can get all the kisses you want, Okay?” He huffs but takes the plate from you, sitting down on the freshly loom-made chair you had just added to your home. You walk over to where you put your basket of clothes by your hammock, opening it to pull out a new top to fall asleep in since the one you had on was merely for celebrations and quite uncomfortable.
You unclip the straps of the top you had on and let it fall to the ground, working to strap on the new and looser one you pulled out from the basket. After changing your top, you looked for a loincloth to slip into that also was loose, your tired eyes becoming far too lidded to think about anything other then sleep.
Just before you could slip into a new loincloth, the hungry hands your boyfriend possessed pulled you back, turning your body to face him all in under a second. You gasped at the sudden movement, realizing he had pulled you onto his lap while he sat in the chair. “Nete, I barely have clothes o-“ Once again, he cut you off with a passionate kiss to your lips, wrapping his hand gently around your throat.
Of course you gave in under his grasp like you always did, his lips tasted of the fruit you had given him before and it only drew you more in then you had been already.
But as soon as you felt his tongue slip past your lips, you quickly pulled away.
“Not tonight, Tey. Your drunk” You try to reason but he isn’t listening. The two of you had already talked about things like this and you knew sober him wouldn’t care if you had sex, but you still didn’t know if you were completely sure about that. “Let’s just go to sleep-“
“You said as many kisses as I want, didn’t you?” He raises an eyebrow while mocking your words, reaching up to stroke your hair with his gentle fingertips. “Looked so beautiful tonight, can’t believe your all mine” His strong arms pull you close to him so his face stuffed between the crook of your neck, taking in your sweet smell through his nose.
Your cheeks grow hot as you watch his tail sway from side to side, his face nuzzling against your body like a cat would do to its owner. You giggled at his movements but he didn’t care, only continuing his actions from before. Your hands combed his braids with care, twisting them around your fingers as you hug his head close to you. Neteyam was always touchy when he was drunk. He needed to be under your skin, only able to smell your scent as he slept.
“Neteyam!” Your body jolts at the sudden sensation between your legs, his hand that was once laid on your back, was pressed against your cunt. “Tey, I don’t need-“ His lips are practically attacking your neck with the most passionate and wet kisses you could imagine, a sigh leaving your mouth as you felt the pleasure fill areas you shouldn’t have. When Neteyam was drunk, he gets extremely horny and practically will eat you alive if you don’t give yourself to him. For some reason your mate hormones are much worse when he’s intoxicated.
He didn’t even need you to please him, he only ever wanted to please you. It was weird because you’d think it was the other way around but not with your husband. His thumb was pressing against your clit with care, rubbing circles to it while his tongue glides against your skin. His lips brush your ear softly before taking its lobe between his teeth, gently pulling it with a chuckle. “So easy, My love” Your ears flick at his hot breath against you, watching as he pulled his fingers back up between your faces to show you the mess you left covering them.
You watch as he slips his fingers into his mouth one at a time, cleaning them from your sweet slick. His free arm snakes around your waist swiftly, and his face leans up to meet your own in a sweet kiss, leaning his large body against your own to guide you to lay on your back to which you quickly oblige.
“Good girl” He praises with a smirk, trailing kisses down your neck till he got to your chest piece. “Let’s get this out of the way, yeah?” You hum, pushing his hair out of his face as he unclips the piece of clothing, eyes gluing to your chest. “You are so breathtakingly beautiful, Syulang. So beautiful” A small laugh leaves your mouth as your cheeks flush at his repeated and slurred soft words and a moan coaxes your throat as he swirls his tongue around your hardened nipple, kneading the other one between his fingers.
When you and Neteyam first started dating, you were so insecure about your body for months but now? You didn’t have time to be insecure because Neteyam quite literally worshiped your body. He’d place kisses on every spot you hated, and remind you constantly throughout the days how beautiful you looked, especially when you woke up in the morning. He made sure to remind you hourly.
“Always getting what you want, huh?” You huff as he pulls away from your chest with a chuckle, and moving down your bare body. His big hands cup under your thighs and push your legs apart, bending your knees back so your heels were laying against his shoulders. His eyes were strained to yours as his thumb circled your clit, watching your face twist in pleasure. It was a guilty pleasure of yours, honestly. Neteyam went down on you almost everytime you had been stressed or angry, and you love every second his mouth is attached to your forbidden area. He knew your body inside and out, and it was practically impossible for him to contain himself.
A small but quiet gasp catches in your throat abruptly and you let your head quickly fall back, Neteyam’s eyes still set on you while he sunk his middle finger inside you with ease. “Thought you didn’t need it?” He teases but your too in awe to care, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth.
“Stop being a tease, Neteyam” you tell him seriously, a smirk pulling at his lips once his full name left your mouth. His face lowered toward your center, curling his finger against the soft walls of your insides as the tip of his tongue touched your clit gently. “Come on, Tey” Your hand is already on its way to his head before you could realize, and you let your fingers roam his braids.
He didn’t know if it was just the alcohol or something but you looked so pretty in this light. Of course you always did, but something about tonight was different. You were impatient and whining like a brat but he loved it, he loved making you suffer knowing he was going to make up for it by the end of the night with you under him, begging for more of him.
You let out a semi loud moan once his lips closed around your clit, another one of his fingers slipping into you unannounced. “Fuck, Tey” Random curse words were leaving your mouth just to help silence your horribly loud moans, holding your husbands head close to your body as he devoured every last bit of you. To say you where in love with him was an understatement.
His long fingers were just enough to brush your cervix and Neteyam always took advantage of that, gently pushing you over the edge till you had been trembling under him. He sucked harshly against your clit as your heels dug against his shoulders, choked out moans escaping past your lips.
Your sweet sounds were music to his ears and he couldn’t help but grind himself against the mat under him, his free hand palming his still growing erection. Your hips wind against his face without your control but he doesn’t mind it, it only made him harder watching you struggle the way you were.
“Teyam… Tsaheylu!” You beg your mate to make the bond, pulling your queue to sit against your stomach. He reached behind him and pulled his own without stopping the degrading movement he had against your cunt, letting you do the rest in connecting the two of you.
Your pleasure fills his own body hot and fast, and Neteyam found himself palming himself harder then before, speeding up his movements against you. He wanted to take his time but you both knew drunken sex was a fast experience out of pure lust, you wouldn’t even know you were done till you laid atop his chest at the end of the night.
“Neteyam…!” His name rolls off your tongue with ease since you don’t hold back, fingers clasping around his braids as your back pushed off the floor mat, crying out to your overstimulated clit while you continued to release against him. Neteyam was flush against you, not pulling away until he was sure he had enough of your sweet taste.
Finally, he lifts his head and pulls his fingers from you, watching as your release drip down them with a chuckle. “Your bad, peach” Your able to see his full face now and you can’t help but giggle, watching closely as he hovered back over you.
“Maybe you would look good with a beard” You tease, wiping off the remaining release on his chin and around his mouth. You lean up to his lips, brushing them against your own. You could feel his heart beating out of his chest as you move to his ear, letting your hand travel down between the two of you. His eyes widened once your hand wrapped around his painfully hard cock, practically holding back a whimper that threatened in the back of his throat. “Aw, baby… your practically suffering” You could feel the small beads of pre that left his tip urgently, placing soft kisses against his jaw. “However you want it, Mr. Sully”
His ears perk at that name and he almost instantly pulls your face in front of his own, capturing your soft lips in a rough and wet kiss. Your free hand untied his loincloth before traveling up his back, leaving light scratches against his blue skin. “Want you to ride me” He confesses against your lips and you couldn’t help but smirk, pushing against his stomach gently.
“The balcony” you mumble and his eyes fill with complete love as he lifts you up in his arms, carrying you out of your cave and to the big ledge that was connected to it. You called it a balcony to which humans would say because it wasn’t small enough to be a ledge, but it was safe to say you and Neteyam had your fair share of sex there. You even had a whole bed out there for when the two of you fell asleep watching the sunset. Plus, who wouldn’t want to make love while watching the sunset? Thank Eywa your cave was in the forest away from everyone else’s.
You watch as Neteyam sits on the bed you had out there and your eyes catch a glimpse of the beautiful contrasted sunset, a smile appearing on your lips. Neteyam’s eyes were burning holes against your body, mesmerized in how perfectly your shape shadowed from the sun in front of you. It captured every curve, every glowing freckle that was slowly lighting up against your skin, he could fall in love with you time and time again if he kept looking at you like this.
Your attention is fully turned to your mates body, eyes taking in the beautiful man in front of you. His legs were slightly open and his cock sat pretty against his stomach, the sun capturing the shapes of his abs perfectly. His arms laid calm next to his body but you could tell he was getting impatient, shifting every so often which made you giggle under your breath.
You let your knees softly hit the ground before crawling towards him, running your fingernails gently across his thighs till you were sitting right in front of his erection. It was clear he wanted to jump straight into sex and as much as you did too, you wanted to take care of him first, even the playing field a little bit.
“Y/N, please” His head is spinning from his drunken state and he’s becoming desperate as your grab hold of his length, stroking it ever so slowly with your eyes examining its every vein and shade of blue. A lot of woman wouldn’t be so obsessed with this part of their men but not you. Neteyam’s body was your fortress and you loved every last bit of it. He was so pretty, and his cock very much had been so too.
“Such a pretty cock, baby” The words are hushed into a whisper but his ears fall back and so does his head, butterflies filling his stomach. He wasn’t the only one with a praise kink. His tip was a shade lighter then the rest of his length but wasn’t light, and the width it portrayed made it hard for you to close your small hand around it. “Just hold on a little longer, sweet boy. Gonna make you feel so good”
His eyes squeeze shut once he feels your tongue glide against his tip, collecting the pre that was still escaping from him. Your tongue is exploring every inch on his length in under a minute, and you can clearly see he was barely holding on above you. His moans were hoarse and grunted, trying his hardest to conceal himself since you had been basically outside.
“M’gonna come if you don’t—shit!” His body jerks and your eyes meet his, watching his reaction as his balls meet your palm, his cock still buried deep in your mouth like you had something to prove. You knew he wasn’t going to last and that’s exactly what you wanted, you wanted him to feel what you did. “Please, baby. I… Y/N-“
His words only make you speed up your movements, chasing after his high. You could feel him pulsing in your mouth, and his hand reached down to hold the side of your head, more of in a comforting way then pushing you down. He was far too drunk to even argue with you, he just wanted to be inside you now.
And soon enough, he came undone with the loudest whimpers you had ever heard him let out, painting your tongue with the hot spurts of his release. His chest heaved horribly as you pulled away from his length with a pop, his eyes retracing back to your own watching you swallow its remains.
His cock was still painfully hard but you didn’t waste any time on that, moving up on the bed so you’d hover over him, allowing him to capture your lips against his. “So perfect” He hums, noticing a small bit of his release was still on your cheek. He wipes it with his thumb, sinking it past your lips with a chuckle.
Neteyam’s large hands slowly slip over your bare hips, waiting for you to sink down on him. His head was between your neck now, attacking it with wet hickeys you knew would leave a mark the next day, a moan slipping from your mouth as his fingers tighten around your skin.
“Come on, Syulang. I’ve got you” He reassures, taking one side of your butt in his hand, squeezing the pillowed skin as your hands find his shoulders for balance, his tip pressing against your very wet slit. You hold his head against you, letting out a shaky breath as you sunk down on him with ease, that familiar full feeling you were so fond of. Your husband hums in approval and in full pleasure, messaging your skin gently till your body met his and you were fully sat on his lap.
His tip was already brushed against your cervix without even moving, and your walls couldn’t help but clamp over him every other minute. “Oh my god, Tey” you pull his hair back as you lift your hips with the help of his hands, watching his eyes fall onto your own.
“That’s it, just like that” Your bodies become so close once you start, faces barely even an inch apart but you didn’t kiss, you wanted him to watch you. He reached undeniable heights inside you, bruising up your skin just to help you move your hips.
Soon your movements sped up quickly, and holding onto his shoulders didn’t help at all, you had to place both hands on the wall behind him just to gain stability. Your mate watches you in awe, as if it was his first time seeing you this way. Your hips grind against him the way he loved while your head fell back into the air, the both of you becoming slightly sweaty already.
Drunk sex always felt way too good but usually it was faster and much sweatier, this felt far too different. Even if your hips moved fast against his, it still felt like everything had been in slow motion. The way his hands held your delicate body in his embrace as he thrust his hips up to meet your own, how his lips parted in anticipation to kiss yours, Neteyam was so hungry for you—his body, was hungry for you.
“Gonna come, Pretty girl?” As if your whimper wasn’t enough to confirm his question, the way your hips moved way faster against his with your walls effortlessly clenching around him was definitely enough. Your body was calling for release and he could see that, coaching you through it with the simplest of words.
His hand leaves your hip and attaches itself around your neck, pulling you down to his face so your lips would crash into each others. His tongue instantly slipped into your mouth through your moans, holding your hips down so he could hit your deepest areas. Your high was approaching fast and he could feel it corrupting you, sitting up with you in his arms so you were literally sitting in his lap.
Your arms wrap around his neck and you can’t help but pull away from your husband, throwing your head back as you rode him faster then before, nails digging against the skin on his chest. “Ma’Teyam- fuck!” Your whimpers and moans are only motivating him more, the friction between the two of you was almost unbearable.
His large hand cups the side of your face and all that can be heard is the sound of skin slapping against another, your moans echoing the forest like a mockingjay’s song. “Come for me, Ma’Tìyawn. Talk to me, Baby” His voice is husky against your ear and it makes your body completely feral, leaning your sweaty forehead against your mate’s when you feel the pit grow in your stomach.
“Oh, Tey” You moan breathlessly against his face, pushing his hair away from his eyes to look at him. “I love you, I love you, I love you, I-“ He ceases your rambling with a sweet kiss to your lips, reaching down to rub your clit between the two of your bodies.
“I love you far more, My pretty girl” He hums against you and watches as your eyes roll back, you were so close—just barely tipped over the edge. “Now come for me so I can turn you over and fuck you like you’ve been wanting for the past week” With only a few last circles against your clit and strokes to your dripping cunt, you came undone harshly against his body, gripping onto his shoulders as you let out the most beautiful cries he’d ever heard.
Your body shutters against his and all that could be heard now was the breathing between you two, his hands reaching up to caress your face gently. “Fucking hell, what alcohol did we drink!” He chuckles, kissing the tip of your nose.
Both of your eyes traveled down between the two of you, noticing the puddle of liquid you had left on your mate’s abdomen. You always got so embarrassed but he found it so attractive, he wanted you to give him that validation.
“Hands and knees, Face toward the sunset” You slowly remove yourself from your mate, turning your semi-weak body toward the orange sunset, doing exactly as he requested. You had no idea how you were so worn out but the feeling of his hands against your back were enough to bring you back to reality. “That’s it. M’gonna sort you out baby, don’t worry” His voice is low behind you as he pushes his length against your slick, coating it in more of you.
“Your teasing…” you push back against him eagerly, earning a small chuckle from his lips as he leaned down, hovering his body over your own. His hands lingered over your body as he placed soft kisses along your shoulder before moving to your ear, taking it between his teeth. His body was so warm against yours and you could feel yourself getting hot all over again, leaning into his touch.
“If you don’t like my teasing, why are you moaning?” He questions cockily in your ear and you roll your eyes, pushing your arms out in front of you so your back was fully arched for him. The boy chuckled, pulling your hair away from your now fully exposed neck so he could access it, his free hand reaching down to line himself up with your slit. “Keep doing that, and you’ll wake up pregnant again” You hum against the bed with a smile, Oh how much you missed being pregnant.
“What if i wanted that? Our daughter is already three” His large hand clamps over your mouth as he continued to place kisses along your body, ignoring what you had just said. You were both drunk but he was sober enough to know this was just your alcohol talking.
“Ask me when your sober, My love” Some of his words are slurred but he speaks all the truth, removing his hand from your mouth and to your neck, tilting your head till he could kiss your lips.
Your breath is taken from you when you feel him slip into you all at once, and you quickly pull away from him with a gasp and your fingers squeezing the loom under you. “Your so… fuck—your annoying!” He chuckles, reaching down to pull your hips closer to his own, already stroking you at a steady pace.
Your body moves with every slow and passionate thrust, and a soft moan comes out with it. Neteyam is loving above you, whispering sweet nothings into your ear with that husked accent of his. “I’ve been thinking about this all. Fucking. Week” His breath his hot against your neck as he speaks, you could feel the sweat between you two and the heat you both shared against your connected queue’s.
Usually, the two of you would have a date night on Tuesday’s every week while his parents or your own watched your daughter, but this week was so hectic you didn’t have any time to do so. Much like Neytiri and Jake, your love language was flying or sometimes swimming. You and Neteyam would spend the night just holding each other, loving each other. Without date night, you two didn’t have any time to yourselves other then when you’d go to bed.
“Then why are you going easy on me? You know I love it when your rough” You know your words will tease him in a way he’d give in and that’s exactly why you said it. Usually the two of you would make love during sex, but you were so tired of that now. You wanted him to treat you like you were still teenagers. “Lost your touch, Mr. Sully?”
“Lost my touch? What are you saying, Tìyawn” You could tell his words were with content and not worry, and you knew now that you had him right where you wanted him. “Are you saying I can’t fulfill your needs?” You giggle and push yourself into him even more, earning a small groan from his lips. “My mate, you are playing a dangerous game”
“You know what I want, Teyam. So give it to me” His hand is clasp around your neck, tilting your head back till you could look at him with those big doe eyes you loved to tease him with. “That’s all you want, right? To please me?” Your eyelashes bat at him without your control, watching as his eyes slowly turned into voids. You had him now.
He didn’t even have to speak, only staring into your eyes as he pulled out of you, pushing back in with force and intent. Your eyes roll back and your body jerks up with every thrust he sends you, ten times harder them before. Your hands reach back to hold onto him but it only pisses him off, grabbing your wrists to cling together in front of you. His body was practically inside your own, laying on top of you while pinning your hands.
Your moans were much, much louder now and you couldn’t control them. He was hitting every little area in your body, one’s you didn’t even know you had. His cock wasn’t just kissing your sweet spot, it felt like it was the easiest spot for him to access and everytime he’d hit it, your body would shake under his. “This is what you wanted, right? Me to fuck you like your some teenage whore again? Ha. Can’t believe you said I lost my touch” He chuckled in your ear, biting the soft skin of your shoulder. You were begging now, so fucking desperate for him.
“Yes! Fuck, this is what I wanted, Tey. Wanted you to fuck me how you used to!” How he used to? Great mother you should’ve never said that.
“How I used to?” Of course your words make him rethink and come back ten times harder, lifting his torso from you to pull your hands behind your back, earning the loudest whimper from you. “That’s okay, my love. I’ll give everything to you now, and don’t even think about coming till I say so” there he was, your teenage fever.
It looked inhumane the way he was treating your body. From the way his hips snapped into yours, to how he held your hands right behind your back, and how he pushed your face into the bed to muffle your very loud moans. But it all felt way too good, this is exactly what you wanted and you knew he was the only man who could fulfill it. You never wanted him to stop.
“Right there! Right fucking—oh my god” You were so close to your edge it was torture. You were practically begging him to let you come before you had to, you knew you couldn’t hold it much longer. “Tey, I can’t… I’m— fuck!”
“You better hold it” He threatens, pushing your arch deeper. You let out a cry and his husband reaction was more then enough to slow down, reaching down to your neck to pull you up against his body. Your head fell lazily against his chest but your reassuring eyes told him everything he needed to know. “Safe word, pretty girl?” You shook your head and grabbed his, pulling his face against yours in a rough kiss. He wasn’t hurting you, he could never hurt you.
“I need it, Tey. Please… want you to mark me all over again. Give it all to me…!” You speak through your broken moans, feeling his tongue glide along your neck. Your body was screaming for him and the sound of your wet cunt around his cock was all that could be heard, that forbidden sound that brought you so much pleasure. His fangs are just barely above your skin, teasing you with his tongue and long strokes. You cry, begging your mate to sink his teeth into your skin like he used to, to claim you as his all over again.
From the second his teeth sunk into the delicate skin of your neck, to when he started to send slow strokes to your body, you felt yourself lose control and the only thing keeping you up was his hand wrapped around your stomach. You couldn’t take it, the pleasure was far too much.
He can feel your undeniable orgasm approaching and so was his, and at this point he couldn’t hold back anymore. His teeth remove from your skin, tongue swiping over any blood that escaped from your neck with his heavy breath beside you. “Look at you, taking my cock so well. Fuck, m’gonna come… want you to come with me. Can you do that for me?” You nod desperately, moving your hips against his to meet his rough strokes. “Touch yourself”
Your limp body is heavy in his arms as you reach down, rubbing circles against your clit at the same speed of his thrusts. Your moans and begs only grew louder, and Neteyam was on his very edge. “Did so good for me—Come, pretty girl. I’m right behind you!” His coaching words make you cry aloud, holding onto his body for support as you felt your orgasm slowly tipping over its end, rubbing your clit. faster to chase that high. “Just one more, baby. Need you to come so I can fill this pretty cunt nice and full just like you wanted”
“Nete—fuck, fuck fuck! I’m… Mmph! I’m coming!” He continues to coach you to it, and with one last snap of his hips and circle to your clit, you felt your body release it’s everything onto his. He shushes your loud scream while silencing his own grunts, fingers digging into your hips to pull you close, painting your gummy walls with his white, hot release.
All that was heard was your heavy breathing and the sounds of birds chirping in the air, and you soon found yourself collapsed next to each other on the bed. Your chests were heaving horribly, and the sweat that drip from your foreheads were now everywhere. You were so tired.
Neteyam turned to look at you but wished he hadn’t when he finally caught wind of the way your body looked. You were bruised, marked, and the he had done it all. He was the one who did that to you. “Great mother…” his words didn’t seem pleasurable anymore, voice just barely above a whisper. You turned your head to see your mate’s eyes lingering on your hips, fingers brushing against your skin.
“Neteyam? You followed his guilt filled gaze and you were finally able to tell, realizing your wounds. You feel bad yourself, watching his eyes and how they filled with pain. “Neteyam, It’s okay-“
“I’m such a Skxawng! I… I’m so sorry, My love” He reaches to touch another wound but your hands cup his face in time to stop him, eyes softening at his big doe eyes that looked like they wanted to fill with tears. Neteyam was a gentlemen before anything, that’s one of the things you loved about him so much, but as soon as you were hurt in any way, he felt like he had failed you—especially if it was his fault.
“I told you what I wanted, didn’t I? I’m okay, your okay, everything is okay” a small laugh leaves your mouth as you wipe the dot of blood on his lip from marking you, still watching his eyes search yours. “You want to make it up to me?” He instantly nods desperately, grabbing your arm.
“Anything. I’ll do anything, Y/N” You smile, he was so cute when he was worried for you. You didn’t even need him to do anything, you just wanted him close.
“Watch the sunset with me?” Your eyebrows raise slightly and his face softens, a smile pulling at the corner of his lips. Ending the night like this was perfect. It was almost as if you had just gotten back from date night. He leans down gently to place his lips against your own, relishing in the taste of your sweet lips. You were okay and he knew that, he just couldn’t understand how he could do such things to your body. This only happened when you were in heat or he was in his rut.
He lays back and places one of his arms above his forehead while opening his other for you, watching you with a smile as you cuddle your naked body over his. Your head is nuzzled between his neck and your legs are shuffled with his own, the light of the sunset reflecting off your skin. Neteyam grabbed the blanket from behind you and pulled it over you both, laying his large arm over you once you were comfortable.
“I’m still so fucking drunk” He sighs making you laugh while you drew imaginary shapes along his chest, leaning your head up to kiss his jaw. “We can sleep now” You roll your eyes with another laugh, imagining what it would’ve been like had you actually went to sleep when you told him to earlier.
“I love you, Pretty boy” You hum, hugging his torso. He looks down at your already relaxed body, leaning his face down to kiss your head.
“I love you way more, My beautiful girl”
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Taglist: @angelsamor @mashiromochi @luvagirlsworld @doggyteam2028 @lu-the-ghost-reader @viajaeger @jakescumdump @myh3artt @erenswife5 @rinizitos @luz15sstuff
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w2soneshots · 6 months
Text
Toddler -W2S
words: 0.7k+
warnings: none.
summary: you and Harry enjoy a holiday in Dubai with your toddler.
notes: Currently got major baby fever so here's some dad bog content🤭. Enjoy!💓
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Liked by wroetoshaw and 1,017,349 others
y/username: living the dream☀️🌊 @wroetoshaw
-comments-
gkbarry_: you look incredible get in my bed
-> y/username: 🛏️🏃‍♀️
faithloisak: enjoy my lovelys🫶🏼
taliamar: cutest family ever!🥹💗
y/nfanpage21: I love this sm
user2104853: the third photo is adorable🩵
Over a year and a half ago me and Harry welcomed our little boy into the world. So far it's been incredible and I've enjoyed every minute of being his mum, even through the tough parts his little smile would make the hardships completely disappear in an instant. Harry is also an amazing dad, it's like he was born for the role. A few months ago Harry surprised me with a week long trip to Dubai, and what is our first holiday as a family of three. I was extremely excited and almost immediately called Faith to get advice on what I should pack for Ollie, which is what we ended up naming him.
We arrived two days ago and are already having the best time. Yesterday we spent all day at the beach then went for a nice dinner, in which Ollie slept in his buggy the entire time. Today we're going to the Dubai aquarium, getting some lunch and going shopping. I woke up to the sound of giggling, I pried myself from Harry's grasp and reached forward to grab the smiling baby from his travel cot. I placed him between me and Harry in the bed then drifted back off to sleep. I woke up an hour later, reached over to the nightstand and grabbed my phone to see a message from Harry saying he'd gone out to grab some breakfast from downstairs. I got up and took a picture of Ollie surrounded by the white fluffy bed sheets.
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y/username just posted a new story!
I quickly got dressed while Ollie slept and Harry soon came back with breakfast. When we were all ready we left the hotel to head to the aquarium. We rented a car the first day we arrived, since Ollie has to sit in a car seat plus we'll be spending much less on Ubers. I drove (since Harry despises driving) and we were soon parked outside.
Harry pulled the exited toddler from his seat, and we headed inside. Ollie seemed to be absolutely mesmerised by the sea creatures (especially the 'big scary sharks'). When we'd walked around the entire aquarium we left to go get some lunch since we were all hungry and Ollie was getting quite restless and in desperate need of a nap. We went back to the car to grab the buggy from the boot then walked to one of the nearby restaurants.
We sat down to eat our lunch as Ollie soundly slept. As me and Harry finished up our food Ollie woke up, now full of energy and hungry. We'd ordered him some plain chips so he ate them along with some fresh fruit. Which they seem to have lots of here, probably because of the hot weather.
Then we paid and made our way to Dubai mall, which thankfully has air conditioning. I happily looked through some shops while Harry followed me with the buggy. "Almost done?" Harry asked, very clearly bored. I turned around and shook my head jokingly "almost." I said with a smile. "M- mummy?" Ollie babbled. "Yes baby?" I replied squatting down in front of him. "I wanna go- the pool." He smiled. Harry chuckled and I glanced up at him "ok, let's go." I said and a look of pure excitement spread across his face.
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y/username: my toddlers new fixation: sharks😂🤍
-comments-
tobjizzle: looks like so much fun! Hope you're having a great time guys❤️
-> y/username: we are ty uncle jizzle💞
faithloisak: so stinking cute🥺
y/nfanpage21: the mum fits are👌🏼
user50172932: those burgers omfg
When we arrived back at the hotel we got straight into our swimming costumes and headed down to the pool. We found some deck chairs and put our things down, then (after smothering Ollie in suncream) all three of us got into the pool.
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y/username just posted a new story!
Later... "I'm so lucky." Harry whispered, as we lay in bed and Ollie lightly snored in his cot. I smiled "you're so cute." He pulled me into a sweet kiss "I mean it, I'm so lucky to have you and Ol, I love you both so much." "And we’re so lucky to have you Haz."
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fariesoiree · 2 months
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Reader and Sukuna in a fitting room rating the compression shirts he picked out : p
hi anon my love this is long overdue BUT i said i would do it ik i lied once but sukuna is actually difficult for me boooo. i am not lying when i say i struggle with him specifically but characterization is soooo difficult it’s an entire process
anyway past the sob story onto the request! this is done with suburbia sukuna in mind. he has his own fully built universe that i hope to explore more :D feel free to ask about that!! okay request fr below the cut. mdni minors stay away or m calling your parents.
sukuna is supposedly off limits. it’s more of a unspoken rule than anything. if it wasn’t unspoken, you doubt you’d be the only one trying to get unscheduled one on one time with him. even if it was spoken though, there’s a big chance you’d still be seated here now, watching in faux boredom as sukuna pulls yet another shirt off his body.
you’re not supposed to be here. well, you are just not here. you’re supposed to be strolling the shops of the malls, in search of something fitting for nobara’s birthday, something as extravagant as she’d like. it’s just sheer coincidence that you ran into sukuna, at least that’s what you’d tell them.
it doesn’t really matter what megumi or nobara or even yuji thinks. neither of them knows what it feels like to have secret rendezvous with the untouchable. you’ve taken a bite of the forbidden fruit. it would be insane to ask you to put it down, now.
it’s one of your more tame interactions though, so at least you have something to stand on. granted, most of your cognitive function is focused on not gaping like a fish every time his muscles ripple and flex across his form.
“i don’t like that one. it makes you look like a whore.” it’s two short sentences but it’s all you can manage to maintain your little bit of sanity. it’s all the same when sukuna isn’t facing you. he couldn’t possibly read your expression when he’s too busy staring at his own in the mirror.
you can see him though. you can see him and the way his pink lips twitch in a half assed smile. the navy blue compression shirt goes right back in the hanger with the white tag dangling, taunting you of your actual quest. you can see the quirk in his eyebrow before he can utter a word.
“that’s my goal. can’t get more bitches under my belt without a little bait.” all sukuna has to do is cast you one of those over the shoulder glances to turn your insides into mush. he gives off the impression that he knows, with the way his tongue goes to swipe glossed saliva across the soft plains. “don’t it take one to know one?”
by the time your big brown eyes have rolled to the edges of your head and back again, sukuna has already crossed the space between you, tender hand resting on your skin, smoothened with coco butter lotion and vanilla scented body oil. his hand runs up your calf, reaching the edges of your denim skirt. if his all-knowing grin doesn’t tip you off, it would be the tightening of his fingertips around you.
if you were anywhere else, perhaps you would be more enticed to get lost in the inferno his touch leaves your nerves feeling but this is reality, and in reality, he’s snuck you into the dressing room just to show off his physique. it forces you, to instead of being spontaneous and going with the flow, to chide him in a mutter and plant your hands firmly on his chest.
“no. no, ‘kuna this is a bad idea. you don’t need me to tell you that.” your move to turn your cheek towards him does nothing to deter him. your lips weren’t his goal, anyway. rather, sukuna seems perfectly content attaching his lips to your neck to leave behind an array of bruises.
you feel more than you hear it, the rush of air past your ear when he scoffs. sukuna has made himself hovering in the spot between your legs, one knee bent and wedged sandal atop the bench. “oh, it’s a bad idea, is it? don’t want poor yuji findin’ out. what would he think? his good friend, his best friend, chumming it up with me, his dear old brother.” he leans away just enough for a breath of space between you. his pink hair brushes against your forehead as sukuna tilts his head. his eyes shine with mischief but his grip is all the same. “you never complain until it suits you. big fuckin’ baby.”
you’d like to think your efforts work, particularly when sukuna discards you and replaces the object of his attention for yet another shirt on the rack of possibilities. he’s already clicked his tongue and moved on from your conversation while you’re still attempting to defend your honor in a single breath. “just because i have ethics doesn’t make me a baby.” your foot meets the floor in a soft clunk! and you sort out the bunched up material of your skirt.
your words make him laugh, a sound vibrating through his chest and out his body. “ethics, huh? where were you ethics last week? ‘sukuna can you come over? the power went out and i can’t fix it. sukuna i’m so lonely. i’m so bored. i’m so—’ what djd you say? something about your parents not being home. i can’t quite remember.”
“oh my god, shut up.” hearing your own words, although in a much deeper timbre, stirs up an embarrassment so overwhelming, your hands fly to cover your face. “you make it sound like a bad porno.” you’re no stranger to the heat creeping up your neck and spreading that warmth throughout your cheeks.
“should’ve been. i don’t think you could fake that, though. which one do you think will get me the most bitches? blue or black?” sukuna phrases it like it’s some passing thought. it’s a casual conversation to him. your sexual endeavors are normalized and he speaks of it as you don’t have to sneak behind your mutuals.
“black.” the decision falls from your lips before you have time to contemplate it. it’s not an entire lie. it’s just . . . not the best option. he didn’t ask that, though. sukuna asked what would get him the most bitches. he didn’t ask for your exact, and quite personal, opinion. perhaps you were doing him a favor is steering him away from a blue so deep it made his eyes shine. “and hopefully now you’ll get enough attention and leave me alone.”
sukuna scoffs again and shakes his head. pink hair tosses atop his head and he looks back at you again, a familiar smile playing on his lips. “you’re the one that needs to leave me alone.”
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oneweirdbookaddict · 2 months
Note
Are you still doing fic requests? I've always had this weird headcanon that Four eats four times as much as a normal person (cuz he's four people lol). What if he was too shy to tell the others that he eats the equivalent of half the team's food so he's starving himself? What if he and Wild were buffet buddies? The possibilities are endless! Feel free to go angst or fluff or humour, or to ignore my ask altogether! Love your work~
Hey fun fact this was supposed to be fluff 😂
I’m always doing requests! I love doing them, so if anyone has any I’d be thrilled to write it!
Thank you, lovely anon! I hope you like it!
1695 words, warnings for malnutrition? Kinda? Accidental but not really starving yourself? Eating issues? And one (1) very brief, undescribed mention of vomiting. Let me know if anyone wants me to add something!
~~~~
Four hides it well, in the beginning.
When they’re still fresh in supplies, coming across towns on a regular basis, they’re in the woods where he can sneak off and find some berries or fruit if he’s lucky.
The others catch him snacking, and he shrugs it off as a personal preference to snack during the day instead of having full meals.
And it works.
For a while.
Until they stop coming across towns, they leave the safety of the woods, and they’re running low on supplies.
At first, he tries saving the food Wild makes from breakfast, stretching it and eating on the road until lunch, doing the same with his lunch, and then stretching out dinner until he goes to bed.
But then he’s aching with hunger all day.
So he tries eating the full meal, which… well, helps for a little bit. Then he’s starving again.
Either way, he’s practically starving himself.
He didn’t think the effects would be… this bad.
But he gets lightheaded, dizzy, any time he moves quickly he’s convinced he’s going to either pass out or throw up for a second.
Once, in the middle of the night, he woke up shaking uncontrollably. Blankets did nothing- he was shaking until his muscles ached and he was so nauseous.
Somehow, he’d managed to crawl out of his bedroll, stagger far enough away from camp to throw up his dinner, swear Hyrule to secrecy, and go back to sleep.
The others notice, of course. He must look terrible, he feels terrible, he’s so hungry, all the time, and the lack of proper nutrients to his body makes him exhausted.
They’re convinced he's sick- which… maybe he is. Technically. He’s not… healthy.
Wars always looks at him with an understanding glance when it comes up, never arguing with him.
Just always finds a way to sneak him an apple, or even an orange if they find a tree across the massive plains of Wild’s Hyrule.
So he’s not surprised, that when the awful shakiness comes back again, this time in the evening as they’re getting ready for bed, Wars knows what’s going on.
He’s leaning against a tree, ignoring the rumbling of his stomach, fighting to focus on the book in front of him.
His head keeps drooping, though, eyes falling shut, until he dips too much and jolts right back awake.
“Goddess, Smithy, just go to sleep. You’re clearly exhausted.” Legend jokes softly, sitting next to him.
His stomach growls. Loudly.
He doesn’t feel well.
“Hey, you hungry? Four?” Legend feels his forehead, arm wrapping around him when he groans softly.
Wars glances up at them, standing.
The veteran digs in his bag for a moment before sighing. “I’ve got nothing to eat.
Wars produces an orange from out of nowhere, peeling it and handing him a slice. “You alright? Just hungry?”
He accepts the orange, popping into his mouth with a shrug. “I… just feel… weird.”
Wars nods, handing him another couple slices. “I get that too. Low blood sugar- your body isn’t able to release enough glucose into your bloodstream, causing all sorts of adverse effects.”
He nods, finishing up the orange.
“Sugary foods help. Pretty much any fruit, juices, honey. Oranges are my go to.” The captain smiles gently, handing him a cup of water.
“Thank you.” He says quietly, already feeling a ton better.
Wars nods, patting his shoulder before moving away again. “I’m off to sleep, need anything else?”
He shakes his head, getting another smile.
“Alrighty, if you need anything, you can wake me up. I got another orange or two in my bag, too, if you need.”
“Thank you.” He says again, and gets a salute from his friend, making him smile.
~~~~
He’s a nauseous, shaking mess the entire next day.
He manages a few bites of breakfast, giving up when he feels like puking and gives the rest to Legend.
When the shaking starts right before lunch is served, his heart sinks.
But he hands Wind his lunch with hopefully unnoticed shaking hands, the sailor accepting it without too much questioning.
They continue walking, after their lunch break, and he’s shaking so much he keeps stumbling.
The sun bears down on them, the day warm though there’s a nice breeze.
“Wild?” He manages, drawing unwanted attention to himself. Wars is already making his way toward him. “How long until we reach that stable?”
“If we go fast, we can make it tonight.” The champion says confidently.
“Are you alright?” Time asks, voice ever so steady.
“Just a bit lightheaded. I’m alright. We can keep going.”
Everyone just stares at him.
“Four-”
“I’m alright. I’m fine- not even dizzy. I swear. Wild said we needed to get going, let’s go.”
Though they’re concerned, the thought of a real bed and maybe a warm meal pushes them to accept his request and continue down the road.
“Do you need to eat something?” Wars asks softly, hand reaching out.
He bats it away, stomach growling as if on cue.
He feels his cheeks flush up to his ears, not meeting Wars’ eyes.
“He didn’t eat lunch.” Wind rats him out, frowning at him. He throws the sailor a scowl.
“Why not?” The captain asks immediately,
“He’s been shaking all day, too.” Hyrule points out softly.
“I’m fine. Really. Just-”
“Smithy, I need you to be honest.”
“Hungry. I’m hungry.” He sighs, fidgeting with his hands.
“Well… yeah, you skipped lunch, Four. Why’d you do that?”
“We don’t have enough to feed us all.” He mumbles, not looking at the captain. “I wanted Wind to eat.”
“And breakfast?” Legend asks with a raised eyebrow.
He doesn’t answer that one.
Wars gives him an oddly gentle look, reaching into his bag and sighing slowly. “I’m out of oranges.”
“I’m fine. Really.”
“Four, you’re really pale. You sure you’re just lightheaded?”
His feet drag, Legend gently wrapping an arm around him. “Easy, Smithy, you need to sit?”
“No- no, I’m fine-”
“I think your blood sugar is low again, buddy.” Wars says gently, taking his hand.
Feeling his pulse, he realizes.
He frowns up at the captain, pulling his hand back. “I’m fine.” He repeats for what feels like the hundredth time.
He gently pushes away from Legend, stumbling immediately, both the veteran and the captain jumping to steady him, and he sees the twin looks of concern before he hits the ground and passes out.
~~~~
“Four, time to wake up, bud.”
Pain. Throbbing behind his eyes, skull pounding.
“You need to eat something, or the medic is gonna shove a tube up your nose to feed you. That’s going to be very unpleasant, Four.”
“Speaking from personal experience, yes. Very uncomfortable.”
Even with his eyes closed, he can tell it’s bright.
Painfully bright.
“Link, kiddo, we need you to open your eyes.”
A gentle hand in his hair.
He squints in the harsh light, eyes watering immediately.
“Hey… there ya are, you scared us pretty good, kid.”
He blinks, still squinting.
Eyes finally finding the rancher, who looks worried.
“ ‘m’nota kid.” He slurs out, hearing a small laugh.
“Yeah, he’s alright.”
“We’re gonna prop you up, can you drink some water for me? Wild’s making some food, we managed to find a deer to hunt for some stew.”
He obediently sips the cool water, the light slowly turning less painful.
“Small sips.” Wars reminds him gently, taking the cup away for a moment. “Eyes on me? Good.”
The captain eyes him, looking for something that he doesn’t care enough about to find it odd. He’s hungry and he’d like the water back.
“Four. Where are we, do you know?”
He blinks, wondering if this is a trick. “Wild’s world?”
A nod. “Remember what happened?”
“I… erm. Passed out.” He does remember that. Oops.
He tries to reach for the water Wars is still denying him, though the limb feels much too heavy to lift.
“Water?” He asks weakly, getting awarded another drink.
“Four, don’t chug it, you’re gonna make yourself sick.” Wars chastises him softly, taking the water again.
He makes a protesting noise that makes him sound like a child.
“Food’s almost ready, bud, can you wait a minute?”
His eyes flick to Twi, nodding.
Which makes his headache worse, slowly rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“How you feeling, Smithy?”
“Tired.” He mumbles honestly, leaning back against Twi’s chest. “Head hurts.”
“Hungry?” Wars asks gently. “When’s the last time you’ve eaten enough food to be sufficient?”
His eyes flick away despite himself.
“I need… more food to… suffice.”
Wars frowns.
“That’s why I had snacks all the time.” He explains, still looking at his knees. “Then… I ran out. And we got low on… everything, so-”
“You haven’t had enough food to suffice you in weeks?” Wars interrupts, giving him the water back when he reaches for it. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
He sighs slowly as the group all glances up at him.
“I didn’t… want to cause problems. We’re all hungry, making sacrifices.”
Wars nods understandingly, patting his knee awkwardly. “I understand.”
“He does.” Time agrees, shooting a glance at the captain with a small smile. “And you’re a hypocrite, Captain. You’ve skipped more meals than he has.”
“That was different!” Wars defends himself. “We were feeding an army, not nine people!”
Time raises an eyebrow.
Wars looks away, ears flushing.
“Ignore him. He’s lying.” The captain mutters, and he manages a shaky laugh.
“He’s not!” Wind calls, making the group laugh.
“Here, this is ready.” Wild says gently, approaching him with a bowl of stew. The look he gives is all too understanding.
“I had to eat a lot more than your average person after I woke up. Guess it was a side effect of not eating for a hundred years.” The champion says, though, pressing a bowl into his hands.
He nods, looking down at the food. “Thanks, Champion.”
“Anytime, Smithy. Now eat- you need it, man.”
“Goddess knows that right- there’s no way you weigh any more than forty five kilograms.” Wars chimes back in with a grin.
He has to smile, rolling his eyes as he takes a bite.
~~~~
Thanks for reading! Any interaction is appreciated :)
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dhampling · 8 months
Note
ASTARION GETTING INTO BAKING AND ASKING YOU TO SAMPLE ALL OF HIS BAKES
this was such a fun one i love it he is simply a silly guy who wants to be a man of many talents thank you for the request avo I LOVE YOU
He looks at you expectantly. 
The small wodge of cake on the plate in front of you crumbles to dust as you squish it. Astarion pinches his nose. Eyes closed, a beleaguered sigh.
“Too much sugar.” You grimace. 
“It’s going to disintegrate if you do that.” 
You quirk a brow. Astarion looks down at his creation pitifully.
The sweet smell of fresh-baked goods, now somewhat marred by the unimpressive result on the counter in front of you. Kitchen scattered with cooking implements; his apron smattered with still billowing clouds of flour. 
“Clearly the recipe was incorrect, that’s all.” He hums. Looks at the cake for a moment with a stewing resentment in his eyes then turns on his heel. 
“You followed it exactly?” 
His head moves from side to side in a deliberating err.
“Kind of? Not really?”
-
Over the coming weeks he spends endless nights in your small kitchen working to figure out the art of baking, driven by the underwhelming response to his initial offering. 
Astarion argues that it’s his prerogative. With the tadpole so newly gone he wants to broaden his horizons, he purrs, glass in hand; now that he can try anything, why shouldn’t he?
The obvious answer here is that he can’t taste the fruits of his labour. 
No matter the freshness of the produce, nor the quality of the flour grain; it all resembles ash past the threshold of his fangs. 
 You’re frequently dispatched to the market to gather more treats for Astarion to experiment with - the textures, the smells, the way they come together in the binding heat of the stove - and despite a rocky start, you find yourself more and more impressed with the results.
He observes each time he comes to you with a platter of treats, notebook in hand; eyes glued to your face whilst you meticulously try each and every little morsel. 
What began as plain muffins and oat biscuits evolves quickly into bites of his own creation. 
He figures out how to make a creme filling; the perfect ratios for butter pastries, how to temper chocolate and the best ways in which to use it. You use the best descriptives you can manage to help him understand the texture, the taste; the consistency of everything that makes its way into your mouth as he fervently jots every last word down.
The big one - which he absolutely succeeds with - is your birthday cake. Richly decorated and built on the densest sponge you’ve ever tasted, topped with raspberries, almonds, fresh cream, vanilla. The anticipatory stare across the table as he watches the first forkful lift to your mouth and the sweetest kiss he receives as you smile into his. 
He enjoys it. A hobby, definitely. Not the kind of thing he’d pursue for gold - if only for the fact he can’t enjoy a single bite of his own creations - but if he can keep you in the finest of baked goods then he considers every delighted groan from your starving mouth a success. 
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Napoleonville [Chapter 1: The Fall-Down House]
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Series Summary: The year is 1988. The town is Napoleonville, Louisiana. You are a small business owner in need of some stress relief. Aemond is a stranger with a taste for domination. But as his secrets are revealed, this casual arrangement becomes something more volatile than either of you could have ever imagined.
Chapter Warnings: Language, sexual content (18+ readers only), dom/sub dynamics, alligators, kids, parenthood, smoking, cupcakes!
Word Count: 7.2k (she's very chonky for a first chapter).
Link to chapter list (and all my writing): HERE.
Since this is the first chapter of a new series, I'm going to tag a bunch of usual readers, but I won't tag you again unless you want me to. 💜
@persephonerinyes @tinykryptonitewerewolf @daenysx @babyblue711 @arcielee @bhanclegane @jvpit3rs @padfooteyes @marvelescvpe @travelingmypassion @darkenchantress @yeahright0h @poohxlove @trifoliumviridi @bloodyflowerrr @fan-goddess @devynsficrecs @flowerpotmage @thelittleswanao3 @seabasscevans @hiraethrhapsody @libroparaiso @st-eve-barnes @chattylurker @vagharnaur @moonlightfoxx @heliosscribbles @beautifulsweetschaos @namelesslosers @partnerincrime0 @burningcoffeetimetravel-fics @marbles-posts @maidmerrymint @backyardfolklore @dd122004dd @jetblack4real @joliettes @mariahossain @minttea07 @please-buckme @florent1s @tempt-ress @wintersire @w3ird11 @eltherevir @florent1s @maii777
Let me know if you'd like to be tagged! 🥰🧁
“What do you want to do to me?” you whisper through the phone, stretched out across your bed like a cat as George Michael’s Faith plays from the baby pink Panasonic boombox out in the kitchen. It’s late afternoon, and fading daylight falls in tiger stripes through the window blinds. The May air is hot, muggy, golden; cicadas hum in the southern live oaks, an ancient earthen music like rattling bones.
A few seconds pass before he can reply. It was a bold way to begin. You are admittedly a little impressed with yourself; an idea like this has been pacing around in your skull like a beast behind bars for years, but you’ve only now set it loose. “That’s difficult to explain in words,” he says; and in the low, teasing purr of his voice you can hear that your gamble paid off like striking oil. He has a British accent, which you never would have expected. You only recognize it from clips you’ve seen of Prince Charles and Princess Diana on 60 Minutes. “But I’d enjoy showing you.”
It’s laid open beside you on the bed, his personal ad in the Bayou Journal: Educated white male in his mid-20s. Single and not looking to change that. Seeking an open-minded, adventurous, and spirited lady for short-term D/s arrangement. Be prepared to answer the following riddle: I’m small but loom large, I’m Italian but French, I give away much to gain little. Who am I? Best regards, An Indecent Gentleman. “I’m waiting.”
“You understand what is meant by D/s?”
“Of course,” you say, your best feigned flippantness. You only know because Amir told you; he’s been daring you to call for three days.
“Thank God,” the man on the other end of the line sighs. There is an inhale like a drag on a cigarette. You imagine what he might look like: broad or slight, dark-haired or blonde, striking or average or homely, treacherous or safe, forbidden fruit or just plain forbidden. “I’ve had four different women ring me thinking I’m going to be their boyfriend, dinner and flowers and everything. They’re functionally illiterate down here.”
How unfortunate, you think. He’s highfalutin. But alas, no one is perfect. That’s no prohibitive obstacle. He doesn’t need to be faultless; it’s not as if you’re planning to marry the guy. “I like when someone else is in control.”
“Why?” This is a test, you can feel it. You can sense his rapt attention across the wire, through the electricity and the lush treetops and the rust-amber sky.
“I have a lot of…responsibilities in my real life,” you explain. “A lot of pressure. I make the decisions, I look out for other people. Sometimes I want to be the one who’s told what to do.”
“I can make that happen. And the riddle?”
“It’s Napoleon.”
The grin is sharp and triumphant in his voice. “Good girl.”
“He was short but an emperor. He was born in Corsica to an Italian family, but he ended up ruling over France. He sold off a bunch of French colonies to focus on conquering Europe and still couldn’t quite manage it. But the U.S.A. got this charming little corner of the world as part of the bargain.”
“You’re a historian,” the man says, sounding pleased.
“No sir, we all had to learn about him in school whether we wanted to or not.”
“Sir,” he echoes, tasting it, savoring it. You imagine a pink tongue flicking out to skate across his lips. Then he is abruptly cool, impersonal, businesslike. “Listen, I’ve got a scar down the left side of my face. It’s thin, it’s clean, but it’s noticeable. The eye is glass, although you can’t really tell unless you look closely. Is that a problem?”
A scar? Is he a veteran? A lion tamer? A motorcycle enthusiast? You try to remember what kinds of hobbies British people have. Isn’t there some kind of sport where men swing sticks around while riding horses? That sounds like it could put an eye out. Perhaps to your own surprise, you find that you are more intrigued than uneasy. Oh, you realize, dull like dawn through mist. I like him. I want him. Not just THIS, but HIM. “No, I don’t think so.”
“Brilliant. I don’t want to talk about it again.”
“That’s fine.” You hesitate. “There’s actually something I should tell you too.”
“Hm?”
The hum of his voice is arrogant, hungry. You try not to get distracted. Blood rushes hot and ashamed into your cheeks. “Um, well, uh, sometimes it’s difficult for me to…you know. Finish. Not when I’m alone, just when I’m with a guy. Especially if I’m anxious. And I don’t want to feel worried about faking it or making sure it happens or dealing with you getting offended or upset or whatever. Because it’s fine, really. It doesn’t mean I’m not having a good time. I’m just…stuck in my own head.”
There is a sound you can’t quite match to an expression, an exhale, a scoff. “Obviously I wouldn’t be mad at you. But you’ll come. I know you will. I’ll make you.”
And you’re flooded with a relief that you never dared to hope for. A confession spills out in a trembling whisper: “Please.”
“When?” he says, eager, urgent.
“I think if we don’t do it now, I’ll lose my nerve.”
There is a razor-thin pause, and then he asks for your address.
~~~~~~~~~~
You haven’t had a man in your bed in years; you are abruptly and unkindly reminded of this when you paw through the top drawer of your bedroom dresser and find only practical, deadly unsexy cotton Kmart underwear. You dash to the closet, yank open the squeaking door, and—tucked away in a cardboard box of winter clothes like sweaters and jeans, forgotten, needless—unearth a sprinkling of insubstantial silk and lace, all in luxurious gemstone hues: amethyst, ruby, sapphire, onyx, emerald.
“Oh, hallelujah.” You throw off your sunshine yellow shorts and tug on what were once upon a time your favorite panties. They don’t fit nearly as well as they used to; they fit horribly, in fact. They evaporate the thrill and leave nauseous trepidation in its place. “Oh God. Oh no. Oh no, oh no.” You steal a harried glimpse of the clunky black alarm clock on your nightstand. The flashing red numbers inform you that you have approximately ten more minutes until he arrives.
You jog pantsless to the kitchen, pour yourself a glass of sweet tea—ice cold, bright with a squeeze of lemon juice—and pace back and forth across the wooden floor as you sip it. The pine boards slope at just the slightest angle; if you laid an apple by your feet, it would roll. The house is sinking. It was built at the turn of the twentieth century, but it won’t live to see the next. Ailing sunlight casts your shadow against the wall, mint green, spider-leg cracks inching through the paint. Outside cicadas buzz and doves coo in long, mournful whirrs.
You pick up the phone—pink to match the boombox that is now playing Poison’s Nothin’ But A Good Time—next to the refrigerator and dial with one finger, your other hand still clutching the frosty glass of sweet tea. It rings twice before he answers.
“Wassup?” Amir says distractedly. You can hear a commotion from his living room on the other side of town: his grandmother squawking, ambient applause, Wheel Of Fortune.
“Quick, what should I wear?”
“Huh?”
“The guy! The guy from the ad! I called the guy! What should I be wearing when he shows up?”
Amir cackles. “Ho, you must be truly desperate, why the fuck are you asking me?” There is some shrill protestation in the background. “Grandma, don’t you dare try to act like you’ve never heard that word before, we just rented Aliens.”
“You know what men like,” you plead.
“Not the straight ones!” And then, not to you: “Grandma, calm down. Grandma, Grandma! It’s my homegirl. She has an emergency. She’s got a man coming over and she doesn’t know what to wear. What did you wear for Pop Pop? What? What?! You expect me to believe you got seven kids out of that dude with just some old floral nightgown?! Prairie girl fabulous? Looking like you’re on your way to join the Donner Party? Okay, if you say so! Phyllis knows best!” Amir’s attention returns to you. “Grandma suggests a nightgown.”
You are skeptical. “That seems slutty.”
“You’re inviting some stranger over for an all-expenses-paid ride on the Pussy Express and you’re concerned about looking slutty?!”
He has a point. “Okay. Okay. Yeah. You’re right. Okay.”
“You wear that nightgown with confidence and you take that random kinky man directly to bed, do you understand me?” Amir orders.
“Totally,” you say, gulping sweet tea with a shaking hand.
“Good luck. I gotta go, it’s the Bonus Round. Hope you have a few rounds to tell me about tomorrow.” Then he hangs up.
Back in your bedroom closet, you find a black satin slip that runs to your ankles and flows like a ballgown. You put it on some nights when you’re feeling desirable, after a bath of bubbles and steam, candles and Madonna, freshly shaved legs and shimmering with Pond’s, when you want to lounge around daydreaming, when you want to remember the fantasies you once had about what your life might turn out to be. Now you wear it in the fading daylight, nothing underneath and golden sunbeams turning your skin to something that warms and glows.
You appraise yourself in your dusty dresser mirror, and you think: Not too bad, actually. You’ve had your hair up in a haphazard bun. You reach to take it down, then stop yourself. You like the wayward wisps, the I-don’t-care-too-much casualness. Your breathing is slow and calm again. There is a noise outside: tires crunching on gravel. Your glass of sweet tea, now mostly just ice cubes, is sweating on top of your dresser. You grab the glass, swipe the Bayou Journal off your bed, and take both to the kitchen counter, still speckled with flour, powdered sugar, flecks of cinnamon. Then you pad across the sloping wooden floor in your bare feet to open the front door. Amber dusk streams in; you can hear bullfrogs croaking and the hoots of the long-eared owl that lives in the collapsing, overgrown shed behind the house. Spanish moss hangs like cobwebs, like chandeliers. The tree swing rocks idly in the breeze. The first notes of You Shook Me All Night Long play from the kitchen boombox.
His car is red, sporty, with a logo on the grill that you don’t recognize, a series of circles intertwined like rings. He cuts the engine and steps out into the driveway as you watch from behind the screen, leaning against the doorframe with your arms crossed over your chest. He’s tall, trim, blonde, wearing Adidas sneakers and light-wash jeans and a Marlboro jacket that it’s far too hot for. He peers around, taking in the trees and the house through his black aviator sunglasses. He puffs one last time on a cigarette before putting it out on his own windshield and starting towards the porch. And immediately, primally, you crave him like water or air.
He climbs the groaning steps, splitting wood and rusty nails. You open the screen door to meet him in the threshold. And he takes off his sunglasses so he can look at you, stowing them in a pocket of his jacket, his gaze not wavering from yours, his lips not saying a word. Yes, he has a scar, but it doesn’t diminish him in the slightest. Yes, his left eye may be glass, but you wouldn’t have noticed if he hadn’t already told you. You’re too tangled up in the right. His iris is a brisk greyish blue, not like the ocean, not like the bayou, more like the sky before a hurricane, heavy with the threat of wind and rain. His face is strong, jarring, beautiful in a rare way. His full lips are curling into a grin.
At last, you speak first, an inane observation that feels somehow significant. “You found me.”
“I did.” He nods towards the large lavender sign out by the mouth of the gravel driveway. Hand-painted on it are the words Hummingbird Bakery and a logo that Amir designed, a hummingbird feeding on the frosting swirl of a cupcake as if it’s a flower flush with nectar. “You told me to look for the sign. That helped.”
“What kind of car do you drive? I don’t recognize it.”
“It’s an Audi Quattro.”
“Audi,” you repeat, like a hopelessly distant place, New York City or Los Angeles or Paris or the moon. “Is that British?”
“German, actually.”
“You’re from a very different world.”
“Yeah, I am.” His eye flicks up and down your body, black satin that curves and clings; his grin widens. “But I could learn to like yours, I think.”
You step back so he can follow you inside. The screen door shuts with a bang. Under the shadows, as the sun sets into the west, he unzips his Marlboro jacket and tosses it onto your living room couch. Underneath he wears a white t-shirt. We’re opposites, you think dazedly, wondering what he will taste like when he kisses you. He grazes his fingertips down the front of your throat, continues to your chest, stills when he hits the satin of your slip.
“You can tell me to stop whenever you want to,” he murmurs, and you breathe in his smoke and cologne and dauntless, dizzying self-assurance. “But until you say stop, I’m gonna keep going.”
Your heartbeat is drumming beneath his hand, part exhilaration and the rest nerves. You are afraid of disappointing him; you aren’t sure what to expect. “I don’t even know your name.”
“Aemond.”
Aemond. Foreign, like Audi, like Paris. You give him your own in return. He leans in, presses his hips to yours, denim and satin that you can feel his heat through. And you think he’s going to kiss your neck, or bite it, bruise it, mark it, claim it, claim you; but he only ghosts his parted lips from the edge of your jaw to your bare shoulder, inhaling slow and deep, drawing your atoms into his lungs until they tumble down the narrowest corridors and into his capillary beds, into his bloodstream. You moan softly, helplessly, and turn your face to kiss him.
“No,” Aemond growls, teasing you, catching your chin with one hand to hold you still. His other hand glides down the front of your slip and stops between your legs. Through satin the color of a starless midnight, his fingers stroke you roughly, commandingly. Animalistic yearning bolts low to weaken your knees, high to rip a gasp from your throat. “Nothing underneath,” he notes in approval.
Oh, I like him, you think, in equal parts ecstatic and petrified. I REALLY like him.
But are you going to be able to impress him too? Are you going to ruin this?
You whimper, unintentionally and almost inaudibly. Aemond is studying your face; furrows appear in his scarred brow, so faint and fleeting you might have imagined them. Then his hand retreats as he says: “Show me your toys.”
You gape up at him; this is not what you anticipated. “What?”
“I want to see how you make yourself come. You have toys, don’t you?”
“I do,” you admit, though you’ve never used them with anyone else before.
Aemond smirks mischieviously, then commands: “Show me. Right now.”
You lead him to your bedroom and slide open the middle drawer of your dresser. You glance at his reflection in the silvery glass of the mirror; he’s staring, not at your body but at your face, his gaze locked with yours, his mouth open, entranced, hungry. You move to stand against the wall, smiling sheepishly as Aemond shoves aside folded sheets and pillowcases to reveal your collection. It’s nothing too adventurous: five vibrators in different colors, styles, sizes.
“Quite the assortment,” he praises.
“They were gifts from a friend.”
Now Aemond is dubious. “A friend?”
“Don’t be jealous. He doesn’t like women.”
Aemond laughs, warm and boyish like he’s breaking character; and you are alarmed by the wave of fondness for him that crashes through you. It’s something that could pull you under. It’s something you could drown in. He picks up the largest vibrator: long, thick, pink like soft feminine vulnerability, like love. Then he is darkly, deliciously stern again. “On the bed.”
“No.” Not because you’re genuinely protesting. Because you want him to make you.
Aemond grabs you around your waist and drags you towards the bed as you squeal, giggle, fight him halfheartedly. He throws you down onto the wildflower-patterned duvet and climbs between your thighs, parting them as he pushes the hem of your black satin slip up to your waist. Abruptly, you are bare for him, exposed, fiery dusk air cool against your wetness. Aemond is still fully clothed, white shirt and pale blue jeans. He is holding your legs open with his own. You can see the bulge of his cock beneath the denim: at least as large as the vibrator and hard with insistent longing.
I want him, you think as you hear the vibrator click on. I want him, I want him…
Aemond brings the pink silicone tip to your flesh, and instantly you’re ravenous. It shocks you how much more erotic this is when someone else is holding it, when someone else has you entirely at their mercy. You cry out, loud and shameless, euphoric. Your back arches; your fingers twist into the duvet. As he presses the vibrator down more forcefully, Aemond braces his hips against yours, grinding into you through his jeans, taunting you, conquering you.
You fumble for the button and zipper of his jeans. “Please—”
“No,” Aemond snarls, beaming, snatching your hand and pinning it up by your head. His other hand is still circling your clit with the tip of the vibrator. “You haven’t earned it yet.”
“Aemond, please, I need you—”
“No,” he says, defiant. He makes the rules. He has the power; he’s in control. Suddenly, he pulls the vibrator away. You yelp in dismay. “You know,” Aemond quips cavalierly. “It’s a shame you have such a difficult time finishing when you’re with a man. I bet you’re not even close.”
“I am,” you whine, in agony, in ecstasy.
Aemond pretends to be surprised. “Hm.” He returns the vibrator to your skin, slick, hot, aching in the most wondrous way. You sigh as the pleasure surges through you, as you soar up to the previous plateau and then begin to ascend beyond it. You must have repositioned yourself without noticing; Aemond releases your hand to smack his palm against the inside of your thigh. “Keep your legs apart. I want you wide open for me.”
“I will, I promise.” I’ll do anything you tell me to.
Aemond’s hand ventures lower. Two of his fingers glide inside you and thrust in time with his hips. “Fuck,” he hisses, breaking character again; and something rocks through his shoulders, his spine, a divine temptation that he is battling.
“Aemond, more,” you plead, looking at the massive outline of his cock under his jeans.
“Not yet,” he pants, fucking you with his fingers as the vibrator hums against your clit. “You have to come for me first, baby. You have to earn it.”
And you’re close, you really are, you’re closer than you ever would have imagined you’d be with him tonight, this stranger, this elusive British man, this man from a personal ad in the Bayou Journal that you almost never replied to. Your hair has come undone and is wild around your face; your heart is pounding frantically; your skin is bathed in a sheen of victorious perspiration. When was the last time someone made you feel like this? You can’t recall; the answer might be never. There is a spellbinding, intensifying sensation of warmth, of opening, you’re only seconds from the brink, you’re ready to step off the precipice and into open blue air the same color as his eyes—
Aemond yanks the vibrator away again, grinning toothily down at you.
“No!” You scrabble for him with shaking hands, pulling yourself up as you reach for the vibrator. Aemond pushes you back onto the bed. Despite your protests, you love the feeling of his weight on top of yours; you love the organic symphony he’s built of, muscle and bone and skill and power. His fingers are still pumping in and out of you, keeping you soaked and throbbing, pinning you to the edge of an orgasm without permitting you to succumb to it.
“It’s going to be so good for you like this, baby,” Aemond insists, low and raspy. He’s reading your face, attentive to every detail, drinking up your desperate body and quivering voice. “I swear I’m not torturing you for no reason. Let me show you. Let me take care of you. When it happens, it’s going to blow your fucking mind. Are you ready?”
“Yes, now, please, do it now,” you whimper as you lie beneath him, open, bare, senseless, vanquished.
Aemond drags his tongue over the tip of the vibrator, moaning with lust as he tastes you. Then he at last presses the pink silicone to your clit once more. In your electrified nerves, in your scalding blood, there are sparks and momentum and currents rushing towards the cataclysmic breaking of a rogue wave. “Nice and slow,” Aemond murmurs. “Let it build.”
Instead of the peak, you reach another plateau, so high and so rapturous you can’t stand it, you can’t fathom climbing any farther. It’s becoming so sharp and intense it’s almost painful. Fresh anxiety flashes in your mind like lightning. The momentum begins to dissipate like dewdrops under the late-morning sun. Oh no, I’m going to lose it, I’m going to disappoint him—
Aemond lifts the vibrator off you again; before you have time to collect yourself enough to speak, to apologize, he’s slipped his fingers out of you and carefully guided the vibrator inside, stretching you, filling you, thrusting rhythmically but not too viciously or too deep. He places his thumbprint on the place where the vibrator was just seconds ago and circles quickly, once, twice, again, and then…
You try not to scream, but you can’t help it, can’t stop it; the climax wrenches out of you indescribable pleasure, vanished fears, awe and relief, twisted muscles and gasping breaths, every electrical impulse of every atom, and each time you believe it’s over it rolls a little farther like an endless summer afternoon. When it’s done—truly done—you aren’t sure exactly how it happens but suddenly you’re sitting upright on the bed and the vibrator is lying forgotten on top of the duvet and Aemond is laughing, kissing you—sweat and nicotine, smoke and salt—and caressing your face with his hands, saying: “You were such a good girl. You did amazing. I’m so proud of you.”
“Okay,” you exhale unsteadily, smiling. You nod to the very noticeable bulge in his jeans. “Your turn.”
“No,” Aemond says primly.
“What?”
“No,” he repeats. “Not today.”
“But…but…why?”
The curl of his lips is crooked and playful. “To prove I’m not just here to get myself off.” He kisses you again, far more tenderly than any random dom from a personal ad should. “You don’t trust me. But maybe next time you will.”
“How could I trust you? I don’t even know you.”
“We’ll have to spend more time together.”
“You seriously aren’t going to fuck me right now? Me? A mostly-naked stranger you met up with exclusively for the purposes of fucking?”
“Are you dissatisfied?”
In truth, no; your pulse is slowing, your thoughts are calm, your lust is satiated, you’re reasonably certain that you’ve sprained no less than four muscles. You feel like the sky after rain: emptied, unburdened, untroubled, at peace. “Not at all.”
“Then you shouldn’t be complaining.”
You reach out to touch Aemond’s unscarred cheek and he smiles. You try to ghost your fingertips over the left side of his face and he flinches away, leaves the bed, takes the vibrator to the bathroom to scrub it with soap and water. “Can I at least pour you a glass of sweet tea or something?” you call after him. “I feel guilty. I feel like I didn’t uphold my end of the bargain.”
“You exceeded all of my expectations,” Aemond says with a strange sort of somberness. “But sweet tea sounds great.”
You take five minutes to clean up and change into real clothes—ratty denim shorts and a red, white, and blue Pepsi t-shirt, chaotic hair, no bra—and then meet Aemond in the kitchen. He’s surveying the large circular table, which is littered with covered cake plates in a hodgepodge of sizes and colors; you found most of them at yard sales and thrift shops. The sun has set and the stars have risen; the kitchen is illuminated by yellow-hued florescent light. Night air flows in through the screens of the open windows. The boombox is currently playing Tiffany’s I Think We’re Alone Now.
“What’s the deal with that?” Aemond asks about the cluttered kitchen table.
“They’re the baked goods. For my bakery.”
“Right,” he says, remembering, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “The sign out front.”
“Would you like anything? Today we had butterscotch chiffon cake, coconut custard cake, blackberry dark chocolate cupcakes, pecan pie, red velvet brownies, lemon blueberry cookies, lavender black tea cookies, chocolate meringue pie, butter pecan muffins…”
“How about those?” He points.
“Oh! Those are banana bread cupcakes. One of my favorites.”
“Banana bread…cupcakes?”
“Here.” You plop one on a plate for Aemond, then go to the refrigerator to pour two tall glasses of sweet tea. “A lot of people put chocolate chips in their banana bread, but I feel like any chocolate really eclipses the banana flavor. It’s so subtle, you know? So what I do instead is cinnamon, honey, cream cheese frosting, and a tiny bit of sea salt mixed into the batter. If you get the ratio just right, there’s this really great blend of saltiness and sweetness, and the banana is still the star of the show. Of course I’ve fucked up plenty of times too and almost given myself dangerously high blood pressure. If I ruin a batch, I’m the one who has to eat it. We can’t let anything go to waste. Our profit margin is thinner than a crescent moon on the best months.”
“Oh my God,” Aemond says. He’s taken a bite and is now gawking at the banana bread cupcake. “You made this?” He gestures to the table. “You made all of this?”
“My best friend Amir runs the business with me, but most of the recipes are mine. My mom used to bake all the time when I was little. Now she has rheumatoid arthritis and has given it up, more or less, but that’s where I learned a lot of what I know. And I try to come up with new ideas each week to add to the rotation.”
“This is exceptional,” Aemond says. His mouth is full of the rest of the cupcake. He washes it down with a few gulps of sweet tea; ice cubes jangle in the misty glass. “This is, like, insanely good. Can I have another one…?” He’s already lifting the cover off the cake plate.
You chuckle. “Yeah, seriously, have as many as you like.”
“How much do you sell them for?”
“The cupcakes are $1, but you don’t have to pay me. You get the unrequited orgasm discount.”
“Just $1 each.” Aemond is incredulous. You aren’t sure what that’s about. He sets the second cupcake down on the table, tugs a black leather wallet out of his jeans pocket, and gives you a $10 bill.
“Aemond, really, you don’t have to—”
“I know I don’t have to. I want to. Take the money. Stop talking about it.”
You smirk up at him. “Is that an order, sir?”
He grabs your jaw with one forceful hand, kisses you roughly, bites your lower lip almost hard enough to draw blood. He tastes like cinnamon, honey, sugar, sex. “Yes,” he says, grinning wickedly. Then his hands drop to unbutton your shorts. The idea of stopping Aemond doesn’t even cross your mind; your desire for him—him specifically—is back, flaring red and primeval and irresistible. “I want you on top of that counter—”
Outside there are footsteps bounding up the front porch, loud on the creaking boards. You tear away from Aemond and hurry to re-button your shorts. What? Already??
You know exactly who it must be.
Well, now I’m definitely never going to see Aemond again.
He’s terrified, he’s wondering whether he should try to jump out of a window. But really, he’s already been spotted; his Audi Quattro is still waiting for him in the gravel driveway. “Please don’t tell me that’s your homicidal armed boyfriend or something.”
“No,” you say. “It’s my daughter.”
“Wait, your…?!”
The door swings open; you hardly ever lock it. Cadi trots in just as you are flipping over the copy of the Bayou Journal on the kitchen counter so Aemond’s personal ad is no longer visible. Instead, what now faces up—dotted with flour, powdered sugar, cinnamon, grease stains of butter—is a column about the rigs opened in Lake Verret. Just what this town needs, you think distractedly. An environmental disaster.
“Mom, whose radical car is that—?” Then Cadi spies Aemond and blinks at him a few times. She is ten years old but thinks she’s your age, short hair, short temper, denim overalls and a t-shirt underneath patterned with multicolored horses.
“This is Aemond,” you explain. He waves awkwardly and then resumes nibbling on his second banana bread cupcake, avoiding her scrutiny. “He’s a friend.”
“But you don’t have any friends,” Cadi replies.
“Watch it, Child Of The Corn. I have friends.”
“You have like one friend.”
“What happened to your sleepover with Mawmaw? I thought you were excited to trick her into watching Hellraiser.”
“Blockbuster didn’t have it. Then Great Aunt Ethel called and said she broke her hip. Mawmaw dropped me off here on her way to the hospital.”
“And she didn’t even think to check with me first, huh?”
“As if you’d have anything better to do.” Cadi races to the refrigerator—careening around a shellshocked Aemond—and heaves open the door. “What’s for dinner?”
“I think we have some Swanson’s meals left. Oh, and spaghetti.”
She narrows her eyes at you. “Who made it?”
“You’re in luck! Not me. Amir.”
“Yay!” Cadi trills, then drags out the pan and begins spooning mounds of spaghetti onto a plate. Aemond looks to you, intrigued.
You say: “I bake, I don’t cook.”
“She really doesn’t,” Cadi concurs.
“Completely different skillset.”
Cadi places a few paper towels over the heaping plate so sauce doesn’t splatter all over the microwave and then sets it to three minutes. As she waits to eat, she wanders over to where the Bayou Journal is lying on the counter and scans the page: Viserys Targaryen, three state-of-the-art oil rigs, Lake Verret, an additional 50 employees hired, Jade Dragon Energy. “Those bastards are going to get their way, I guess.”
You sigh. “Yup.”
Aemond is alarmed. He polishes off the last of his cupcake, frowning as he licks frosting from his lips. “You don’t approve?”
“They’ll blow up the whole town,” Cadi says matter-of-factly.
You smile wanly at Aemond as you sip your sweet tea. “You work for Jade Dragon, right?”
He stares back at you—stunned, perhaps even fearful, a deer flooded with headlights—but doesn’t speak.
“It’s alright. I figured you must. Some smart British guy way out here in Cajun Country? It’s gotta be for a job. Don’t worry. We won’t shoot and skin you or anything. It’s not your fault. You’re just collecting a paycheck, it’s not like you’re running the company.”
“Right.” Aemond grabs a third cupcake and gnaws at it. After a moment he adds: “I have a degree in petroleum engineering. I just moved to Napoleonville last week.”
“I knew it,” you say.
“Boo!” Cadi heckles jokingly. The microwave beeps, then she disappears into her bedroom with her plate of spaghetti. You hear Cadi turn on her little television and flip through the channels until she finds Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Aemond watches her closed door for a few seconds—still processing, you assume—and then turns back to you.
“Her name’s Katie?”
“Cadi. C-a-d-i. It’s short for Arcadia.”
He is impressed. “Greece?”
You titter nervously. You don’t know what he means. “It’s a town up by Shreveport, it’s where Bonnie and Clyde were arrested or killed or something. I’m not sure. Her father picked it.”
“You didn’t have an opinion?”
“Um, I wasn’t really…uh…conscious for a few days after she was born. By the time I was up and around again, he’d already filled out the birth certificate.”
What is that you see flicker across his face like the transient surge of a lightning bug? Curiosity? Apprehension? “I see. And her father is…” Aemond raises a blonde eyebrow, the one his scar cuts through. “On an aircraft carrier somewhere?”
You laugh. “He’s not deployed. We’re divorced, Willis lives about fifteen minutes down the road. It’s amicable.”
“So I don’t need to worry about him showing up on your front porch to murder me with a 2x4 full of nails.”
“No. Although he is the town sheriff.”
Aemond smirks. Is this a challenge or an inconvenience? “Why’d you two split up?”
You shrug, glancing at Cadi’s bedroom door. She is quite aggressive with her television volume; you’re confident she won’t be able to listen in if you keep your voice low. “It’s not that interesting a story.”
“I’m extremely interested.” And he sincerely appears to be, head tilted to the side, eyes fixed on you (though you know the left one sees nothing), thoughts whirling like storm winds.
“Well…we only ever got married because of…” You gesture towards Cadi’s room. Aemond nods, following along. “And I was too young and I didn’t know anything. I didn’t know what I wanted out of a man, I didn’t even know I had the right to set standards to measure a husband by. Willis wasn’t terrible. He didn’t hit me. He just wasn’t really who I wanted.” You chew at your lower lip, peering down at the kitchen counter, drawing circles in the sparse flour dust. “He never even proposed to me. Not properly, I mean. I told him I was pregnant and he said: Well, guess we oughta get married, huh sugar? and then drove me to the Kmart up in Gonzales to pick out a ring.”
“Classy,” Aemond mutters.
“I had to buy it myself, actually. Willis didn’t have enough cash on him. He paid me back later, but still. It wasn’t about the ring. I don’t need gold and diamonds. But I need someone who really sees me and understands me and chooses me, you know? I’ve never felt chosen. And I decided I didn’t want to settle for that. If I ever get married again, I want the whole goddamn thing. The real thing. I want the candles and the flowers and a boombox blasting Heaven Is A Place On Earth. And if that’s not in the cards, I guess I’m not the marrying type.”
“And you’ll make do with occasional visits from your friendly neighborhood dom.”
You grin up at Aemond. “Yeah, exactly.”
“You really hate Jade Dragon?”
“Companies like that…they just use us. Our land, our labor. And then when they decimate the place they pack up and disappear overnight, no pensions, no retirement, no unemployment, no meaningful cleanup, just Thanks for the millions! Bye! and we’re left to live in their filth.”
“That’s a rather cynical perspective,” Aemond says.
“It’s a realistic perspective,” you counter. “In 1965, there was a pipeline explosion in Natchitoches, in ‘79 there was an oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, in ‘80 a Texaco rig accidentally drilled into a salt mine under Lake Peigneur and destroyed the whole ecosystem. Two weeks ago there was a refinery explosion an hour east of here in Norco. 4,500 people had to be evacuated from their homes. So no, the jobs sound nice, but in my humble estimation they’re not worth dying for.”
Aemond considers you, a look that is not patronizing or combative but not convinced either. And there’s something else too: a caginess, a nervousness.
“And these Jade Dragon people, the Targaryens? They have a history,” you continue. “I read about it in the Bayou Journal. Last year they had an oil spill at an offshore rig near Ketchikan, Alaska. They poured hundreds of thousands of barrels of poison into the ocean and killed a bunch of dolphins and whales and everything. Fishermen went bankrupt, people committed suicide.”
“Mistakes happen.” Aemond places his empty sweet tea glass in the sink.
“But they didn’t make it right. Their lawyers blamed a defective piece of equipment and kicked liability back to the manufacturer. They’ll be battling it out in court for the next decade. And meanwhile, the people of Ketchikan get nothing but misery. I don’t want Napoleonville to end up like that.”
Aemond gazes out the kitchen window and into the cicada-rattling night, faraway, pensive.
“But seriously,” you say, more casually now. “I get that it’s not your fault, Aemond. I don’t hate you or anything. You’re working for a living like anyone else. You can only do so much.”
He looks back to you and smiles vaguely. “I just go where they tell me to.”
“And that’s why you like to be in control when you’re with me.”
“Yes,” Aemond says; and on his face—strong, scarred, perfect—you can see that he is reminiscing, that he is planning what he wants to do to you next. But he can’t do any of it. Not here, not now.
“I’m sorry about…you know. The kid thing. I really didn’t think she’d be home tonight. I would never subject her to something like that, walking in to find a strange guy in the house. And I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable either.”
“It’s okay. I believe you.”
“I don’t usually do this. I’m sure you think I’m lying, but I’m not. I’ve had two boyfriends since I got divorced seven years ago, and both times it didn’t last long and Cadi never met them. And it wasn’t…like it is with you. The dynamic, I mean. The…control thing. They were just normal dudes.”
“And they couldn’t satisfy you,” Aemond says, taunting, proud, setting your blood on fire.
“No. They couldn’t. Not even close.”
You both stand silently in the kitchen amidst a cascade of inconsequential noise: Eurythmics from the little pink boombox, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from Cadi’s room, cicadas and bullfrogs and the long-eared owl from the world outside that is primordial and feral and green. For the first time in as long as you can remember, you feel not like the piecemeal potential of a desirable woman but whole. Aemond’s right eye traces every curve and edge of you in a way that makes you think: Maybe I will see him again after all.
“Come on,” you say, turning towards the front door. “I’ll walk you out.”
But when he steps onto the creaking porch—pulling on his Marlboro jacket, watching lightning bugs bloom like daisies in the yard—Aemond seems to be stalling. “This is lopsided,” he says, tapping the wooden boards with his Adidas sneakers.
“I know. The whole foundation is, it’s sinking. We’ll have to move eventually. But we’ve been in this place since Cadi was five, it has a lot of memories. She calls it the Fall-Down House.”
“Cute,” Aemond says, but he’s pondering something. “Do you own it?”
“Oh no, God no. We rent.”
“Are you saving for a down payment to put on a new house?”
This is a rude question. “A little,” you reply curtly. Not enough. You need to make money to save money.
“Okay.” Aemond senses your discomfort. He’s good at that; it’s an advantageous skill for a dom to possess, knowing when he’s approaching a limit long before you have to shut him down. He descends the porch steps. “I’ll be back for more of those cupcakes—” There is a shrill, alien hissing from out by the tree line. Aemond shouts and scrambles back onto the porch, throwing an arm in front of you to shield you from his enigmatic nocturnal adversary. “What the fuck was that?!”
“Just a gator,” you reassure him, amused.
“A what?”
“An alligator.” You show him the shadow that lurks beneath a young oak tree draped with Spanish moss. “She’s over there. Just stay on the gravel once you get off the porch.”
Aemond is puzzled. How does anyone live in this hellscape? his face says. “How do you know it’s a female?”
“She’s not too big, and she doesn’t bellow. But she sure loves to hiss.”
“I think alligators should have gone extinct with the rest of the dinosaurs.”
“Well, there’s a secret to dealing with them.”
“Yeah?”
You smile, skating your fingers into the sleeve of Aemond’s Marlboro jacket and up his forearm until you feel goosebumps rise on his skin. “If she gets mean, you just have to bite back.”
Aemond chuckles, turns your face towards his, kisses the apple your cheek…and then, for only a moment, his teeth close around the sensitive flesh there leaving a whirlpool of pulsing, forbidden heat. He whispers through your hair: “See you soon.”
“Will you?”
“Yes,” he says, severely now. It’s a commandment, it’s a need. “I absolutely will.”
Aemond leaves you, strides across the gravel driveway without glancing back, ducks into his car, lights a cigarette; you can see the rust-colored glow through the windshield as he takes a drag. You wait in a flurry of moths under the dim florescent bulb of the front porch until his Audi Quattro veers onto Route 401 and disappears.
I hope he meant it, you think as a lightning bug lands on your knuckles and illuminates there like the gemstone of a ring. I hope I’ll see him again.
Then you shake away the insect and go inside to see if Cadi wants to help you clean up the kitchen and get a brown sugar pie baked for tomorrow. As compensation, you’ll offer her the $10 bill Aemond gave you for the cupcakes.
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Professional Oversight
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Masterlist
Warnings: this fic includes dark content including rape/noncon, power imbalance, blackmail, and other potential triggering elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You are noticed for all the wrong reasons. (plus sized reader)
Characters: Helmut Zemo, Brock Rumlow
A note on reader characters:
For clarity,  each reader will have a defined nickname when appearing in any installment not their own. This is Scribble.
Note: real life interrupted me
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. Thanks to everyone who reads this one and thank you for all your energy.<3
Love you all like Donkey love Waffles. Take care. 💖
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You stare across the courtyard as you let the spoon stick out of your mouth. You hoped the spring would make the days seem less blurred, maybe bring some excitement to your dull life. You suck the last of the yogurt from the silver and scrape the side of the cup, scooping up the fruit bottom and cream. You savour the last bite, so overly sweet it makes your cheeks twitch. 
You tap the empty cup so it makes a hollow noise. You crush it in your hand and stand to toss it in the bin just across from the bench. You sit again and wipe the spoon before you tuck it away, folding it in the kleenex to sink to the bottom of your purse. You sigh and watch a long-necked goose honk at an oblivious pedestrian. 
You’re used to it. The sounds, the sights, the latent energy of the university green. You thought it would be better to eat there instead of the stuffy office break room but after a while, it’s just as boring and bleak as the old institutional walls. 
You zip up your purse and checked the slender watch on your wrist. Just a little longer before you have to drag yourself back to your shared desk to answer phones and redirect lost students. You don’t hate your job only that it’s all you have. Your life is as fruitless as the used yogurt cup you just tossed away. 
You wake up, eat, get ready for work, go to work, eat lunch by yourself amidst a sea of indifferent people, go back to your desk, then wait until it’s time for you to go home, and there, nothing. Just you and the evenings filled with lonely restlessness. You want to do something, anything, but you just can’t figure out what. 
You aren’t an interesting person. Plain, at best, with no discernible talent. Friends never flocked to you despite your effort, even as pathetic as those were. You’re always a fleeting thought to other people. You’re kept around so long as you are useful; a study buddy, a wing woman, and occasionally, a shoulder to cry on. But there was rarely any reciprocation in those roles and never anything meaningful enough to call friendship. 
You’re distracted from your existential daze by a shadow above you. You look up at the man as he smiles at you. It’s more akin to a leer. That’s odd. He’s odd. Men don’t smile at you, they barely even see you. And he surely doesn’t belong here. Too old to be a student and his jacket too casual to be a professor. 
“You mind if I sit?” he asks without greeting. His tone is brusque but unconcerned. 
You looked at the empty spot on the bench beside you. You hug your purse and sidle over. You shrug and mumble “sure,” but he's already sitting. 
He sits with his legs wide and pushes his shoulders back. He sighs as he stretches out his broad figure. He glances around nonchalantly and leans back with his elbows over the back of the bench. You look at your watch again. What’s a few minutes early? 
“You work here?” he asks before you can stand. 
You blink and furrow your brow at him then glance around at the green campus. You waver on the bench. You should just walk away but you hate to be rude.  
“Uh, yeah?” you answer awkwardly. 
“Not that you-- you don’t look young enough to be a student, you know? I had a hard time telling, which is why I asked,” he explains as he turned his palm up, “I wasn’t meaning-- heh, well, you look like a very nice lady, is all.” 
You poke your tongue out between your lips and quickly retract it. Your thoughts are racing. You should get back to work and away from this man. He gives you this creepy crawly feeling. 
“Brock,” he holds out his hand as your eyes graze the dark five o’clock shadow along his sharp jawline. 
You force out your own name and nervously shake his hand. You’re polite, perhaps overly so, but your customer service instinct can’t be repressed. His grip is firm and his hand big enough to cover yours entirely. He lets you go reluctantly and you hook your purse over your arm. 
“Sorry, I gotta get back to work--” you stand as the sirens in your head tell you to leave. His grips speckles in your hands, throbbing in the bones, tingling on your skin. 
“That’s too bad,” he says coolly, “maybe I’ll see you around.” 
You nod dumbly and step past him. You trod down the path, on your usual route, then stop as your suspicions tug at your mind. You turn back as he remains on the bench, his gaze stuck to you. 
“You work here too?” you call back. 
He shakes his head and smirks. He doesn’t say anything as you frown. He doesn’t move. He just watches. You turned back to your path and quickly stomp away. You’re unsettled by his presence alone but his assured calmness at being an intruder on campus is even more frightening. Not least of all, his interest in you; always an unexpected trait. 
🖊️
After work, you walk across campus without urgency. You fall into autopilot. Your departure trails over its usual route. There’s nothing special awaiting you at your destination; only your couch and a frozen pizza.  
Students still loiter and hop up the steps of the buildings on the way to evening classes. You envy them just as you had when you were in their shoes. You were never really one of them. You always felt like you were on the outside looking in. You didn’t find your niche, you just floated along untethered, still lost in the breeze. 
The lot you park in is mostly empty. You prefer that one even though it’s a ten minute walk from the building you work in. It’s far from the main row and so you didn’t get caught in a jam on your way out, not until you get to the roundabout near the east entrance. 
You stroll along behind the few other cars parked before yours and check your phone for the time. You don’t hear the footsteps as they approach and the dimming sky disguises his shadow. You don't notice any of it until you’re grappled from behind. You’re taken off your feet as a large hand covers your mouth. 
Your phone bounces against the tarmac and your bag is flung from your arm. You kick out and flail, whining into the calloused palm as your eyes prickle. You grasp at the thick arms as you’re spun around to face the open trunk. You kicked at the man’s feet as he bends you and shoves you headfirst into the trunk. You try to push yourself out but he’s too strong. 
The lid shuts and you roll over to beat on it as you holler. Your heart pounds in your ears and your lungs burned as your voice turns to horrible gasps. Panic drowns you as the engine turns over and the car backs out smoothly.
Oh no, no, no. This can’t be happening. 
The suddenness of it all has you dizzy. The man’s scent clings in your nose. You've smelled that before. Your eyes round in the darkness as the tires roll without stopping. No, no, no. That man! The same one on the bench. 
You didn’t forget him. You couldn’t. The abnormality, the absurdity of his introduction, was enough to stick in your head. It’s only that you didn’t let yourself believe it was anything but a strange encounter. You know who you are, you know you’re nothing special. Unlike him, you’re not interesting enough to remember. 
Or so you thought. 
You thump on the lid of the trunk, then the back, screaming. The car doesn’t stop. The man only muffles your voice with the radio. As you continue your assault on the walls of the trunk, he slams on the brakes so that you roll violently into the siding. He does the same several times until you’re quiet and stunned. 
Your adrenaline fades to fear as you can only lay in the dark and dread what comes next. The worst scenarios race through your mind but every now and then, your heartbeat spikes again. You have to get out.
Bang, bang, bang, ‘let me out!’ 
You’re shaken and exhausted but utterly and painfully awake. Whatever comes next, you can’t just put your head down and ignore it. Not like everything else in your life. This is the one thing you have to face, whether you like it or not. You can’t just brush it off, you can’t just forget. 
You wanted desperately for something to happen in your dull life but could never conjure a nightmare as real as this. 
🖊️
When the engine slows and the axle lurches to a stop, you’re not ready. How could you be ready for any of this? You don’t understand why this is happening to you. 
The car shuts off and your heart reaches its paramount. It’s beating so fast you can’t think. You can barely breathe. The car door slams shut and shakes the entire vehicle, making clear that you are overpowered. Footsteps tread over the ground towards the trunk and you steel yourself for the horror that awaits you. 
You know his face before you see it. Even as the shadows swallow up his features, you know him. He grabs you by the front of your blazer, hauling you out without a word. He handles you like a stray caught; rough and agitated. You claw helplessly at him and whine. 
“Please--” 
“Scream one more time,” he spins you and curls an arm around your neck, marching you forward with stunted steps, “and I’ll crush your throat.” 
You gurgle and clasp onto hit thick forearm. Your tears well over, though your face is already raw from the waves of terror that poured over in the black of the trunk. Lights wash over you and give some sense to the grounds around you. 
You expect an abandoned warehouse or some faraway cabin. Somewhere remote where you’ll never be found. Somewhere you’d be forgotten. Who is there to forget you? 
Instead, you make your way up a long walkway before a large mansion. At least compared to your box apartment, it seems as such. Your low heels clack shakingly as the man keeps you firmly hooked. He takes you up the front steps, between replicas of famous status, and lets himself in through the double doors, the brass knockers jiggling with his entrance. 
He doesn’t seem the type to live in a place like this. The thought is silly given your circumstance. Your sobs settle to hiccups as your mind wanders to the tedious and unimportant. Is that a genuine Rembrandt on the wall? 
“Can you walk on your own or do I keep the leash on?” He snarls. 
You gulp and try to nod against his burly muscle, “yes...” 
He lets go at the wisp of your agreement. You shudder and pull away from him, not far as you don’t want to instigate him. You cross your arms and look at him, pouting as tears roll to your chin. It is the man from the bench. You knew it but now you’re certain. 
“Up,” he points to the left branch of the double staircase. 
“Sir, please, why are you doing this--”  
“Sir?” He grimaces, “no questions. Just go.” 
You snivel and put your head down. You turn stiffly to the staircase and reach for the curled banister. You climb with dread heavy in your heels. Your shoe slips off and you stumble. He growls and lifts you under your shoulders, dragging you up the last few steps. 
“Left. Second door on your right,” he commands. 
You whimper and hug yourself again. You obey as peruse along the finely decorated walls. The details assure you that whoever’s home this is has a precise eye. There is some familiarity in the style; it reminds you of some of the offices nestled in the heart of the university. 
He reaches around you, crowding you against the door as he turns the handle. His breath scalds down your neck. Is he smelling you? 
He pushes the door open and snaps his fingers. You enter and look around for an answer. Why are you here? Who has brought you here?  
The leather chair behind the desk has its back to you. You can see a man’s dark hair above it. Like some sort of movie, he turns to face you slowly. You unwittingly step back against the other man as you’re struck by the reveal. 
“Ah, I was starting to think you got lost,” Helmut Zemo intones as his latent gaze meets your startled one. 
His soft brown hair with wisp of silver, the keen way his lips naturally curve, and his dark eyes. He's unmistakable. The vaunted dean of linguistics and language studies is the last face you expect to see.
“Dean?” You murmur dumbly and chuff out several shallow breaths. 
“Hello, darling,” he purrs as he sits forward, putting his elbows on his desk, “I trust you had a safe journey.” 
“I-- what?” You gasp. You turn to look at the man prowling behind you. “No, he--” you choke as he snarls at you.  
You face the dean again. It doesn’t make sense. Why are you here at the dean’s home? You only really know him by his likeness, pasted on every literary publication on campus and hung in the halls across his faculty. You’ve met him once at some lunch but it was that fleeting formal introduction you forget before you’ve even left the event. 
“Rumlow, I told you to be gentle with her,” he tuts and shakes his head, “allow me to apologise for my colleagues behaviour. He isn’t the type for sorries.” 
You mop your cheeks with your cuffs and sniffle. Your a shaking mess. The other man paces towards the other side of the room. He uncaps the decanter there and pours himself a glass of dark liquor. 
“Now, it is rude to serve oneself before a lady,” Zemo snips, “please, she would do well for it.” He turns to you after reproaching his associate; the man he calls Rumlow. “Sit, dear, let us speak civilly before things get... less civil.” 
You suck in a quaking breath, “I don’t understand--” 
“Sit and I shall explain,” he insists. 
You cross the large study and claim the seat across from him. The other man approaches and holds a glass of flat scotch under your nose. The roiling alcohol fumes and makes your eyes water anew. You accept it he loudly slurps his own. 
“Thank you, but I...” 
“Drink. I believe you will need it.” 
The dean’s words draw your attention back to him. You make yourself sip and scrunch up your nose at the taste. You don���t drink. It only gives you a headache. 
“Now, I’ve brought you hear because I would like to review your work,” he smirks and goosebumps raise on your skin. Rumlow looms close as Zemo’s tone puts you on edge. “I do enjoy when university staff are so eager to put their work out there.” 
You’re confused. What does he mean? You’re not a PhD, you’re no faculty spending hours writing papers on physics, you’re just a registrar’s assistant. 
“Ahem, let me just...” he pauses and unfolds a tablet on the desk. He props it up in the case and pulls his glasses down to his nose. He taps the screen and begins to read, “'You can hardly believe it’s real. That you’ve put yourself in this position. There’s no going back now. There is no escape from this man...'” he pauses and looks up at you, waiting for a reaction. Your spine tingles, “let me go on to my favourite passage,” he refocuses on the tablet, “’his rough hands grazed her soft skin, making her shiver, making her whine. He smothers her protests and her breath as he drowns her in a hungry kiss”.” 
Again he looks at you. You sink down in chair and turn your attention to the liquor. Oh no. You make yourself drink. You don’t stop until it’s empty. The other man laughs. 
“You have a way with prose,” Zemo praises. 
“Please,” you choke through the burn, “I... its just stories. They’re meant to be private. It’s...” you bite your lower lip. It still doesn’t make sense. “Why am I here?” 
Now both men laugh. You’re the joke. You look between then. Rumlow approaches and you shy away. He takes the empty glass and walks away with it. He clinks it down with his own on the oak bar. 
Zemo watches you intently. You rock in the chair. He could’ve fired you in the office, so what is all this? 
“I like your hypotheses,” he slithers, “I thought we might test them out. As is the academic way.” 
“What?” You pulses thumps in your temples, “what do you--” 
Rumlow startles you as he closes his hands around your neck from behind. He hushes you as he squeezes your yipe into a croak. He drags you up to your feet as you writhe and kick out. One of your shoes falls off in your struggle as he lurches you forward. 
“You know, fantasy can be such a good outlet for... self-discovery,” the dean stands as his chair rolls out behind him, “but it pales in comparison to the real thing.” 
“Please--” you crackle out of your throat as Rumlow squeezes your neck tighter. 
“And reality is a writer’s companion. Their work is always better when they have experience to draw on,” he comes around the desk as Rumlow brings you to face him. You can’t help but press yourself to the other man as the dean closes in. “And a creature like you, you’ve never felt desired. That much is clear. It drips from your words. These stories are a plea for more.” 
He runs his fingers up the lapel of your blazer and urges it down your shoulders and arms. You quiver as you’re trapped between the two men. You can only stare wide-eyed as you reach back weakly to claw at the bigger man’s jacket. He growls and you quickly retract. 
“Now, darling, the fear will only make it all the more... exciting,” he draws out the last word teasingly, “have you not written this one already?” 
You whimper as he unbuttons your blouse. You quake as he bares you plain white bra and you quivering stomach. The other man pushes his crotch to you, grinding with a snarl. 
“Ah, Rumlow, patience,” Zemo warns as he peels your blouse down your arms, “my colleague can be rather... impulsive.” 
Your head swells and spins. This can’t be real. You just can’t believe it. The humiliation of being found out is burned through by the fear coursing in your veins. 
“Please,” you eke out again. 
“Shhh,” he presses a finger to your lips and toys with the bottom one. “Mmm,” he turns his hand to frame your mouth, “how has no one ever noticed these pretty lips?” 
He leans in and kisses you. The other man moves a hand to the back of your neck, pinching so you squirm. Rumlow’s other hand hooks around to cover one side your chest, kneading through the unlined cup as you’re suffocated by Zemo’s mouth. 
Zemo purrs and draws back. He licks his lips and hums again. His fingertips crawl down your sides and across your stomach. You squeak and flinch as Rumlow squeezes your neck harder. 
“Darling, you can be good, can’t you? I fear you’ve been for too long,” Zemo taunts, “but can my associate let you go? Might we trust that you are to struck with lust that you cannot possibly flee?” 
You suck in air and babble. You only want the pain to stop. You nod, “yes...” 
“Yes, Dean,” he corrects and sends a look to Rumlow. 
The vice falls away from your neck, instead tugging at the hook of your bra. Zemo’s gaze falls to your tits and he purrs. He fondles you brazenly, running his thumbs over your nipples as the point through the thin fabric. 
“So plain one must appreciate the simple beauty,” he squeezes and leans in to kiss along your cleavage.  
You bra slackens and he lets go to let it slip down. Rumlow untangle it from your arm as Zemo gropes one side of your chest and seals his lips around your nipple. You moan and the air turns static at the vocal betrayal. 
Rumlow laughs and his hand spreads across the other side of your chest. He rolls your nipple harshly, tweaking as you whine. His hand falls down and he feels along your saft tummy. He growls as he slaps your ass with his other hand. You jolt and Zemo’s mouth pops off your tit. 
“Delectable,” he snarls and gives a nip to your flesh. 
Rumlow yanks down the elastic of your plain slacks. The cheap sort you order online. Your panties slip down halfway as he forces the fabric past your thighs. You reach to brace Zemo’s shoulder without thinking, feeling as if you might tip over. 
He touches your elbow as he bends to once more teethe and tease your tits. He bounces them then crushes his face between them. You stare down in shock, still paralysed in disbelief. 
Rumlow rolls your panties down your ass, your ankles bound up in the gathered wool and cotton. He shifts and lowers himself to his knees. He covers your ass with his large hands and you waver on your feet. He pulls your cheeks apart and snarls again. The man sounds like an animal. 
You yelp as he pushes his face into your ass and his tongue swipes along your tight hole. Oh god! Oh! Your muscles knot and coil and you hug Zemo’s head to keep from tipping between them. You reach one arm back as you arch your back and latch onto the other man’s shoulder. 
You drone out a startled but sultry moan. It’s unlike anything you’ve felt before. You haven’t felt this before. Another’s touch. Another’s hunger. You puff out shallow gasp as you’re caught in the storm of warring sensations. Your fear dissipates as you’re overcome by the slow build of please. 
You close your eyes as you try to pretend it’s just one of your stories. One of the many written fantasies you used to tamp down that need for desire. For this! Even alone, even your own touch, could not ease the longing that needles inside you. 
“Darling,” Zemo growls as he kneels in turn and grips your hips, doting on your stomach. He makes your imperfections feel perfect as he worships you with his mouth. 
Rumlow lets out another growl as he laps and his finger tickles up to meet his tongue. You squeal as he pokes his fingertip inside of you, the scalding intrusion tingling in your thighs. It hurts but in a way that you want more. Without a thought, you lean back, urging him deeper into your ass. 
Zemo traces along your pelvis and over the patch of curly hair. His fingers wander between your legs, nudge them apart and he toys with your clit. You quiver as he rolls over your bud, flicking and swirling as you slicken. You feel the blood swelling at his touch. 
He leans forward on the heel of one hand and tilts his head up, delving into your folds. He trails his hand down your thigh and sucks on your clit as he purrs. Rumlow pulls his finger in and out of your ass as you tighten around him, your walls pulse at their duality. 
Your stomach coils and your insides ripple. A tightness bounds you up as you puff out heavily and spasm through the sudden release of tension. You grip Zemo’s hair, forgetting the man has more than a physical hold over you, your other hand curling on Rumlow’s shoulder. You cum with a warbling yawl as you throw your head back. 
Neither man stops until you’re a shaking mess. Until your legs are so slack that you lean back on the man behind you and your whole body threatens to fold over. Rumlow slides his finger free and Zemo wipes his wet lips up your pelvis before he sits back on his heels. 
The move you as you pant loudly. You have no strength left to resist them. You’re strewn across the leather chaise that sits mirror to the desk at the other end of the room. The men circle you as your head lolls and you lay naked but for one heel still on your foot. 
They undress without a word between them. It’s clear this is planned. That they have every single second of the night calculated. You can only get through it. 
As Zemo reveals his furry chest, your cheeks raze with fire. You’re embarrassed more to see the dean like this than for him to see you. You turn your face away only as Rumlow stands even more bare.  
His chest is covered in coarse black hair that trails down to his pelvis. You gasp at the sight of his rigid length bobbing before him. His thighs are corded with thick muscle and his stomach tightens as he steps closer. 
Your turn your head again and nearly squeal at Zemo. Slighter than the other man he is no less eager to have you. As he nears, you curl into yourself. 
They don’t let you disappear or detach. Rumlow grabs you, lifting you off the leather, and takes your places across the chaise. 
Zemo guides you, something in his hand. You can’t keep up with any of it. He turns you to face the other man, nestling his chin into your shoulder as he holds himself flush with you. He sways you and he presses the shape between the top of your cheeks and squirts coolness down your ass. 
He tosses the bottle onto the chaise and it bounces to rest at the end. He rubs the lube around your hole and dips his fingers in, once, twice, three times. He nuzzles you and moves you closer to the leather bench. 
Rumlow reaches for you. Both men guide you over his prone body. You’re made to straddle him with your back to him. He grips his dick and taps the tip on your ass, sliding between your cheeks as he wets himself with the lube. Zemo grabs it and reaches around you. Another squirt adds to the wetness. 
Rumlow pushes his tip against your ring. You yelp and try to pull away. He grabs your shoulder and holds you in place, stretching you around him slowly. You shake at the deep and fervent agony that radiates up your back. 
Zemo coos at you as he strokes your cheek. He climbs up on the chaise as Rumlow drops his legs over the sides. He sits before you, coaxing you as the other man eases you onto his dick. You grit your teeth and cling to the dean’s wrists as he kisses your forehead. 
“It’s alright, darling, you’re doing good,” he praises and pets your head, “just a little more, mm?” You sink down another inch and whimper, “a little more,” he repeats. When at last you bottom out, tears spring fresh down your face. “Very good, darling.” 
“She’s tight,” Rumlow snarls and starts to rock you, “holy shit, she’s fucking--” 
“Language,” Zemo girds as he continues to stroke your face, “you hear that, darling? You are so good. Hm? He likes you.” 
“Weirdo,” Brock mutters but keeps you moving. 
Zemo runs a hand down your body. A tide rolls through you at the soft graze of flesh, and he once more finds your clit. You’re overly sensitive and so full already. He toys with you as you pout out shallow pants. He slowly lays you back as Rumlow takes you across his torso. 
Zemo dips his fingers into your cunt and out again, smearing around your slickness. As his eyes fixate on your cunt, you close your own, hiding beneath your lids. The other man continues to rock from beneath you, stretching you to your limit. 
As Zemo drags his hand from your cunt, the chaise shifts with his weight. He moves closer, draping your legs around him as he slides his tip along your entrance. He pushes along your folds, wetting himself as you quiver, then aligns himself again. He forces his tip inside, just the head, and lingers. 
He raises himself and bends over you as your muscles tug with tension. Rumlow grunts from below as Zemo bends over to kiss you and inches further inside. You nearly cough into his mouth as he gets deeper and deeper. Oh, god, you don’t know if you can take it. 
Rumlow brings his hands around to kneads your tits, his hips tilting as the other bottoms out in your cunt. They both groan as if they can fill your fullness. You throw your arms around Zemo and gnash your teeth, mewling and moaning as you sink your nails into his back. 
He kisses along your chin and cheeks as he starts to thrust. Long, languid, and calm. It has you on fire as the other man matches his tempo. A torturous teasing rhythm that has you writhing and whimpering. 
You’re crushed between them, bodies sweaty and sticking, the friction of hair and skin, of saliva and need. Your head lolls as Zemo nips and sucks as Zemo nips and sucks at your throat, a hand snaking under your ass, basking in the feel of you as nails graze tender flesh. 
A roughness from below as Rumlow bucks his hips harder, plunging deeper, breathing across your scalp as he grunts and growls. His pinches and gropes your chest as your spine curves wantingly. You succumb to your basest desires, to the fantasies you fall asleep to, the very same that you put to paper. It’s horrid but it’s oh so delightful, being used and bruised and tortured until you just can’t think. 
“That’s it, darling, you see how natural it is,” Zemo purrs as he quickens, “how you give yourself over to your purpose. You always knew you would...” he speaks between stolid groans, “those weren’t only stories...” he cradles your head and lifts it, looking deep into your eyes as he ruts into you, the man below you matching his time, “you were begging for this.” 
Your eyes roll back and you cum again. You feel something inside you snap, like a dam breaking with the pressure of a deluge, you gush out around the men, squeezing and twitching until you are hollow. Yet they don’t stop. They keep going. 
Rumlow sits up as Zemo moves with him, bringing you into his lap. The man behind grips your shoulder as his pelvis claps against your ass and the one before you sits back as you shake around him. He holds your head up as it threatens to wobble on your neck. 
You orgasm again. Your lashes flutter, your heart too. Every part of you is pulsing. Their gristling, grinding voices storm in your skull, almost maddening as their bodies sandwich yours. 
“Shittttt,” Rumlow drawls and bends his head forward, biting into your shoulder as he empties himself in you. He quakes as slows and sits back, twitching as he keeps you around him. 
Zemo sighs as you feel his own release. His hips rock subtly as he cums and holds you close, his eyes roving down to watch you tremble. When at last you’re still, the tremors do not fade. He grazes his knuckles down your stomach and you moan. 
“Shall we try that sweet mouth?” Zemo brushes long you lower lips. 
“Fuck yeah,” Rumlow growls, causing the other man’s eyes to glint.  
He might pretend to be proper but dean has proven himself just as sinister as any man; in reality or fiction alike. 
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Text
Always an Angel, Never the God Full
Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III x Runaway!Reader
Words: 13,104
Your plans to run away with Hiccup fall through. Three years later, you finally make it off Berk and away from the Edge. Here are the years that follow.
Tags: SUGGESTIVE ENDING, Runaway Reader, Angst, bitter reader, unrequited love, requited love, healing, conflicting emotions, compiles parts 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5
<Previous
You waited for hours, back aching against the flat rock, basket of your few chosen belongings hidden behind a small outcropping of rock as you waited for him, increasingly more worried as the sun began to set.
Scared, even. You’d seen the axe, laid plainly on the ground. You feared the worst, especially after your frantic search bore no fruit. That he’d been found, and that something terrible had happened to him.
 But Hiccup was fine, with Astrid, this whole time.
Even Toothless seemed to like her well enough. He didn’t like you, glaring and snapping at you when you got too close, despite all of your efforts to get on his good side. He barely let you on, and he certainly wouldn’t without Hiccup. You had the sneaking suspicion he’d buck if you tried it on your lonesome. 
While you understood, it hurt that even as close friends he’d not told you about Toothless at all, at first. You doubt he would’ve if he’d not seen you do so poorly at dragon training. He probably felt terrible, watching you fail over and over again when he could be doing something to help.
You hugged your knees tightly, hidden behind rock and moss, fighting not to make a sound as you peered around a corner, barely listening in as they conversed.
Even if he never inherited the chiefdom, It was still a heavy expectation that he’d marry. You two were an inevitable couple, if not because of love, out of a bond of solidarity. It’s not like either of you had any suitors. You were friends first, of course, but privately you hadn’t had a problem with that. You got along well, and you could see a future with him where you were both alright.
And you really, really liked him.
You knew he wanted someone else, someone who was confident, capable, who had good standing, who his father could be proud of. Someone who was more gorgeous than plain, someone like Astrid.
You weren’t the best viking, you couldn’t work in the forge, you hadn’t a lot of lucrative talents at all and a measure of clumsiness and troublemaking that could rival Hiccup’s own.
But you were friends, and that had to count for something.
He came to you with his plan to run away. You were running away together, you thought.
But somehow, she was here, and he left with her. He liked her. You knew that. And, you realized with mounting horror as she leaned in closer to him, she liked him too. 
You knew you’d never had a chance, but knowing it is different from experiencing it. You had not a chance in the world.
You could never fault him for that.
You couldn’t stop the tears from pooling in your eyes, or the tiny bits of your heart from splitting apart and scattering across the grass.
Conversely, he didn’t tell you when he flew off to battle with the rest of your peers. The whole thing with the Red Death? You missed it completely. You only found out later after Hiccup had been towed back to Berk on death's door.
Constantly spilling his heart out to you but saving the rest of it for the other teens, the ones who used to jeer at him from the sidelines, who all of the sudden began to treat him well, but still jeered at you while he wasn’t looking. 
A hangers-on to their group, not very useful or funny, just there, always. Not spoken with or talked to or considered at all by anyone who wasn’t Hiccup. Just there.
Your companionship had, for lack of a better word, remained the same, except now there was an undercurrent of something under the surface of a black ocean, broiling and writhing like an angry serpent.
Sometimes it felt like a sick corruption of the friendship you and Hiccup used to have, made up of long held hardship and what you had thought were good times. Sometimes it was better than it was before, and you could joke and laugh and play games the same way you had as children. 
And sometimes it felt like you were speaking to a stranger, one you weren’t sure you’d ever known at all; sometimes his mannerisms, his ticks and even the way he stood were alien to you.
You weren’t even sure you recognized who he was anymore. You never asked why, afraid of the answer you might find.
“So, I’m hoping that if I place a spring there, when I pull the lever it wont catch so violently. The gear system around the side is to help turn the barrel while you’re aiming. Got it? What do you think?”
You nodded, eyeing the vast array of blueprints and open journals spread sideways in between the two of you. Brown leather met leather as Hiccup rubbed his shoulder, no doubt a result of a hard fall he’d taken earlier on Toothless.
“Yeah, I got it,” You say casually, “What about the wheels? If you’re going to be pulling it over grass, you might need to cover the space between the wheels and gears, because the plants might catch and pull up into the gear system.”
It feels fake. Slimy to say, like a lie, except you know it’s not. It feels like a product of something more larger and uglier.
Hiccup picks up a yellowed paper, scrutinizing his own design, “Yeah… Actually, you’re right. I don’t know If- maybe if I shift the base… Yeah, I think that would work. Thank you.”
“No problem,” You puff, blowing a strand of hair out of your face.
“Also, I’ve been meaning to ask,” Hiccup shifted in his seat, clenching and unclenching his fingers, a nervous tick he’d had since the two of you were little, “Your dragon. Have you picked a name for it yet?”
“Ah, no,” You sigh, looking down at your knees, “Honestly, I haven’t been able to find something he likes.”
The picky bastard./Picky beast.
Hiccup had helped you find a dragon before the lot of you had moved, a smallish nadder who still didn’t feel much like your own, but served you just as well as any other would and you did teh best to serve it fine as well. He turned out to have just as much propensity for social upset around the other dragons and seemed to get along with Stormfly, Toothless and no one else.
Speaking of, the black dragon, Toothless, had warmed up to you, and in the end you became no better or worse than anyone else on Berk to him, which you were okay with for the most part.
The others had gotten used to you, though remained relatively detached. Conversations wouldn’t stop nor would people give you the look once you entered a room. You didn’t try to strike up conversation anymore, learning that it was better to be silent than awkward. 
It still did nothing to soothe the hurt, or all of the years you’d spent hurting, or any of the time now you spent on your lonesome.
“If you don’t mind, I can-...” Hiccup leans back, the both of you turning heads as your door creaked open, heavy boots moving across the threshold of your home, wood floors creaking. 
You gave Astrid a nod of acknowledgement as she approached your table and she tilted her head, glancing in your direction.
“Hiccup,” Astrid called, “Are we still flying tonight?”
“Astrid,” Hiccup greeted as he stood up, a soft smile stretching half the length of his face as he gathered his assets, leaving a few papers scattered across the top that he knew he could come pick up later as he usually did, “Yeah, let me get my things first.”
You tuned them out as they began speaking in earnest, leaning back to stare at the ceiling, fingers tapping against your elbows almost antsily as they slowly took their leave.
“Hey,” Hiccup looks back at you as your heart beats rapidly in your chest, “I’ll see you later, right?”
“Right,” You say nearly at a mumble, refusing to look him in the eye, your stomach rolling guiltily as the door shuts behind him, “I’ll see you later.”
Your foot nudged the pack you’d prepared out from under the table in the small, shoddy hut you’d managed on the Edge, slinging it over your shoulder as you watched Hiccup and Astrid take off on their dragons through a crack in your window shutters.
He may have found his happiness with the others but you had not, and you fully intended to leave, the same way he’d planned it all those years ago. 
You knew what you were doing was wrong. Not saying goodbye, just up and leaving in the middle of the night without telling anyone, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to say it.
What would you be leaving behind, anyways? You didn’t have much.
You waited until they were just a small speck in the distance before running out on your own, a pack slung up over your shoulders. The dragon, who you’d parked just behind your hut and who’d spent the past few hours almost patiently waiting for you as you’d spent your sudden and unexpected last few hours with Hiccup, stood to its feet and chirruped as you hoisted yourself up onto its saddle.
Fishlegs was busy in his hut. The twins and Snotlout, maybe they’d notice you leaving but you didn’t have much faith in them asking why or feeling much at all besides a vague expectation that you’d be back later. Everyone went out for a leisure flight every once in a while, it was just about time you’d finally taken yours, after all.
Hiccup and Astrid wouldn’t be back till late doing who knows what. You bit your lip, lightly tapping your Nadder’s side with your heel, signaling for him to take off in the opposite direction, shoving down a deep spike of jealousy at the thought. He was your friend first, and soon he would be nothing to you and it wouldn’t matter at all anymore.
You weren’t sure where exactly you were going. But you knew wherever it was, it would be good as long as it was as far, far away from here as possible.
You grind your teeth, eyes tearing up as a heavy booted foot pushes you down further into the wooden ship floor. The ship rocks angrily as does your dragon, struggling against the barbed netting.
“Who are you? A new vigilante?” The leading trapper, Erik son of Erik or something, asked, bending down above you. He had, coincidentally, been the one to shoot you down.
 “Where is your… hideout?” He leaned down into your ear at your silence, speaking in a raspy whisper. You got the vague impression he was trying to be intimidating, though the end results were more in favor of making you blush.
You were thankful for the hard wood covering your face and, therefore, your embarrassment. Of your belongings, you were only able to manage a mask and had taken to running around ensconced in furs with nothing but a dagger to your name. 
You’d recon you looked much like a wild animal, straddling your nadder bare of a saddle. You had not done too well on your own. It was hard. You had always been a team player if by team player you meant a leech on society. At least, you had been told so.
So of course you had, unwittingly, stumbled onto dragon trapping territory. Extreme sport dragon trapping territory. It didn’t help that you and your nadder hadn’t been on the same page, you two being unable to sync in the way you’d seen the other riders with their dragons, which left a bitter taste in your mouth.
He’d go left when you were trying for right, and when you finally decided to just go with it, he would change his mind and throw you for a complete loop. It was safe to say that even if you got out of this mess you never wanted to step foot on his back again.
You breathed a silent sigh of relief just as the trapper let out an annoyed one, stepping off of you in favor of yelling at his men for damaging their goods. Meaning, your nadder. Was he really yours, though? He did try and make a break for it without you.
 While debating whether or not you should try at the ropes shackling your arms together, you grunt frustratedly, noticing a new tear in your garb.
After running away and getting captured, you had not expected to be kidnapped again by some insane-looking madman in a mask. Though you did look like two of a kind, so it was fitting. 
Your nadder had its wings torn irreparably, so, unfortunately, you had to retire him early.
You found small comfort in that it hadn’t abandoned you on the ship that one final time, though the irony that it had led you here was not lost on you.
He visited sometimes. He took to life in the sanctuary very well. 
You didn’t, a borderline prisoner before you’d been able to win over the trust of the resident feral gorgon. Sort of. She was a woman who let you see her face, more on accident than anything else. You hadn’t let her see you or hear yours. However you weren’t inclined to speak of her nicely, least of all in your head, after the number of weeks you spent trapped in a cave at her behest.
Finally, you’d been let out. Let out enough to walk more than just the short stretch of stone and greenish ice that made up your prison. The endless turquoise was beginning to make you sick.
Recently, you found a real friend in the sanctuary, and this dragon, it was truly yours. Affectionately named, fed and groomed, you two were almost inseparable. It was the kind of friendship with a dragon you’d completely missed out on on Berk.
It was hard to maintain given your captive status, but that was alright. 
There probably wasn’t any social profit involved in being a vigilante, which is why you assumed the crazy dragon lady had taken to speaking at you in her spare time. About the dragons, what they ate, what she had to do. Pointedly she gave away nothing of their true secrets, not that you wanted them, nor anything of her vigilant-ing. Not verbally, though the influx of injuries both on her and the dragons spoke volumes.
She did give away her name.
You groan, rubbing your eyes under your mask as you cradle the thing to your face with the other.
“You’re quite attached to your mask,” Valka said amusedly, shifting the logs roasting in the fire with a stick, pushing them back and forth as you sat in silence. You hardly ever spoke a word, nowadays.
Her dragon, the stormcutter, stared at you with large eyes through the licking flames.
Neither of you mentioned that the only real reason you’d been able to keep your mask so long was that she’d been kind enough to let you. An allowance you’d been given on a whim. One you clung to with all the nervous energy of Fishlegs to his dragon cards.
“... I’d rather not be,” You grumble, voice raspy from disuse, “It’s stuffy.”
“Oh,” Valka looked at you, amused and maybe a little surprised to hear you speak at last, before going back to tend to her fires, “I was starting to think you couldn’t speak.”
“Funny.” You said, lifting a sharpened stick off the ground, spearing it through a slimy, gutted fish from the basket beside you. Your nose wrinkled as you heard the sharp point break skin. No amount of faux stoicism could make it seem pleasant to you.
“I have a few questions,” You grimace under your mask as she asserts herself. She can ask them all she wants, but there’s no guarantee you’ll answer. 
You might, probably, as keeping secrets hasn’t always been your strong suit. She’s certainly been trying to open you up for a while. You’ve not given her any leeway before though, no reason to give her any now. 
“How did you tame your dragon?” She asked, pushing a particularly thick dragon searching for morsels. Valka guides its head gently away with her spare hand before any of the other dragons crowding around them get any ideas.
You wait for a moment, still wondering whether you should follow along. Eventually, you decide to answer.
“Wasn’t me. Someone else back home did it,” You huff, “I just followed along.”
“...But not very well,” Valka hums. It’s obvious she doesn’t believe you. Unfortunately for her, that is not your problem. 
 She pulls a small trout off her own stick, tossing it to a crowd of young dragons, who you knew had acquired a taste for the cooked, through no fault of your own.
You should feel offended, but you know she’s right. You lean away from a wandering dragon snout as it searches you for morsels. The stormcutter, after a look from Valka, shoos it away with a large wing.
 “Where are you from?” 
You feel the embers from the fire as they rise, the furs of your coat becoming nearly unbearable, your skin heated up rapidly. You wrinkle your brow with annoyance as you feel a drop of sweat slide down the side of your face.
“Where are you from?” You retort pointedly.
She studies you cautiously, as if she could glean your intentions from your body language. And she very well could. Or the heat was getting to you, the wells you’d spent in solitude had finally done some real damage to your psyche, and you were hallucinating.
“Berk,” She says. You sit back, surprised, “And you?”
“...None of your business.” You wonder how long it had been since she had left. You pray she would not know you.
Valka raised her eyebrow. 
“I’m serious.” You ground your heel into the dirt. It was a touchy subject, still.
“Berk, too. …Stop looking at me like that.”
Valka leaned back against the ice wall where you rested, looking out over the empty ocean as dragons flooded to and fro the sanctuary. You squinted far into the distance, as if you thought you might be able to see through it if you tried hard enough.
Your hair tugged wildly by the winds out from behind your mask as you sat, one leg extended and the other bent as you leaned back against one arm. 
You probably looked as you felt, weary and unkempt after a long flight over the seas with your dragon, who clambered among the icy spike-lined wall with clawed hands. You felt refreshed yet somehow at odds with yourself still.
You cared little for your bedraggled demeanor the same way you hadn’t cared for much at all in a while. It might have made a cool picture had you not slipped and fallen onto your face on the ice just a few minutes prior. Whether you had broken your nose or not on your mask had yet to be uncovered. All that mattered was that Valka hadn’t seen.
Dragons crowed. Through the cracks in the walls of the sanctuary, the wind would whistle through if it hit the right angle. Louder than anything else were the sounds of the waves crashing against rock. 
But between you and Valka, it was silent. A contemplative silence, the kind of silence you shared with others after a long thought or a hard day’s work. That’s how you knew she was going to break it.
“Why did you leave?”
You are annoyed at the prospect but are no less expectant. After the moment passes, you are not surprised. However, it feels as if you are the one who should be asking.
“Why did I leave?” You ask, “Does it matter?”
A loose chunk of ice falls off the side of the sanctuary as a large titan scrambles violently down the side, chasing after a bright yellow baby. You spot a shape through the fog, distant and blurry enough to resemble a bird though there are no birds here. You pointedly do not think of your small hut, even less of green eyes, and tiny, fading freckles.
Valka tilted her head in your direction, reaching a hand out to scratch Cloudjumper under his chin as he lowered himself towards her, “It mattered to you.”
You open your mouth, but you are only able to choke on your breath. No one has ever said something like that to you, not in a long while. You don’t understand why it’s hitting you so hard. Maybe it’s the isolation.
You blame the burning of your eyes on the biting wind.
 “Why did you leave?” You ask in return, once you’ve taken time for yourself, though you have an idea. You can’t keep your voice from sounding a little bit scratchy.
You unhook your dagger from your belt, trying not to seem so attentive. Instead, you take to carving random shapes into the ice. A gronkle. A nadder.
“I was taken.” She sighs, quieter now. Lost off in memory as you both often are.
The nadder’s spikes are much too long. The gronkle looks more like a sandwich than a dragon.
“Taken?” You prompt and you begin on the outline of a fury. The result is shallow and scratchy. 
It’s one of your own designs, not the same as the one Berk uses. Astrid liked the other one better, not yours, so that was the one Hiccup went with.
“I didn’t leave,” She insisted, almost as if she was trying to convince herself of the fact,  “I had a son, and a husband.”
You’ve seen her by the fires, while trying to sneak out of this hellish ice maze. She talks to herself then. On particularly paranoid days, she’s slept by you, in the same caverns, so you’ve heard it. She talks in her sleep and says things she would never say awake, or had you been around. It’s all so very unsettling. 
“Really?” You remarked with false astonishment. The facade is flimsy, but you figured you’d give her the benefit of the doubt. The grace to assume that you’d no idea what she was on about.
With prompting, you might have seen it earlier. In her slim form, the one she kept hidden under thick furs and thicker armor. You squint. They have the same eye color. The same hair. They both have higher cheekbones, though her son more resembles his father in that aspect. That is all.
Valka shoots you a reprimanding look. Cloudjumper, now creeping down the wall behind you, taps you on the back of your head with its tail at her behest.
Valka was of the air. Though he had the same flighty tendencies, he was very grounded, like his father, though he might either be proud or loath to admit it. He loved flying, yes, but he loved inventing and processing and routine just as much, if not more.
He did when you were close. Of course he did, he spent his whole life on it. You couldn’t really say you knew him anymore.
You didn’t pin Valka as the type to enjoy the same in any sort of manner. But that suited you just as well. You found that as time went by and as you were granted more freedoms, you appreciated it. It made it easier for you to forget. To ignore.
In the end they, you and she, she and you, were one and the same.
“But what does it matter, if you never went back?” You grumble, pushing your dragon’s head away as it nudges you towards the cliff, crooning for more flying time.
You guessed that was why she clung so viciously to the safety of her sanctuary. Why she hated other people so much, why she’d had no faith in the humanity of other people, why she’d held you here so strictly. If things could have been different, then what did she give it all up for?
Though you’d never had something else. Not even the option. You’d never been given it. Valka hadn’t been given it either, but there was a sure difference between something being there and not. 
The atmosphere is silent again, tainted with some darker undertones. If you’d had to put a name to it, you might have called it grief. 
“I want to leave.”
Valka doesn’t look surprised at your request. And indeed, it’s been no secret that you wanted to leave. Maybe she was glad for it, or maybe she was sad at the news. 
After all, you settled into each other's presence long ago. You had a good sort of companionship.
And from that companionship, you learned a lot without even trying, just by watching. Eventually she took notice and she took an active part in teaching you the truths she learned during all her years in self-imposed isolation. 
You two weren’t incredibly close but you could tell Valka was grateful for the company, grateful to have someone maybe even a little bit like her, even if most of it was spent in silence. 
You still left the Drago fighting for her. It wasn’t your fight, it was hers, and you made that clear.
Neither of you brought up Berk. Ever. 
You were content to just come and go as you pleased, for a while. Nonetheless, despite your freedom, you felt restricted to the small world of the Sanctuary and the empty skies around it. There was no place for you on the ground or by the seas, where hunters and trappers swarmed by the thousands and Drago’s armies grew by the day. 
You spent so much time learning from her and yet it felt like no time at all. Which was why you were shocked when you’d truly learned how much had come and gone in full. 
You were out slinking in the shadows, seeking shelter from a storm on the same small rocky outcropping of island that had a shipful of trappers stranded, in a rage and a panic as they attempted to recover their assets. The winds had been too rough to fly, so you had no choice but to wait and listen.
You didn’t believe it at first. It had been…
Months.
You wondered if he’d been married, yet.
Years. 
The idea hurt, not as much as you’d thought it would, still not as little as you’d hoped.
Under clear skies, you found an inn, untouched by everything except grass and trees.
You asked, “What day is it?”
The large man, a burly viking scrubbing down a wooden cup with a torn old rag, had looked down at you skeptically from behind a beaten pine and stone counter.
Two years. It had been nearly two years since you left Berk. Just as Valka’s attachments kept her at the Sanctuary, you needed to go. To run.
Since you had heard it, spoken it, the urge to run, to fly hadn’t abated at all, going from a wispy thought at the back of your mind to a full blown need. Your dragon too had become antsy, maybe feeding off of your nervous energy. Eager to take off, to fly new skies.
“Are you sure?” Valka asked searchingly. You two were stationed over a heavily planted cliff over a large main pool which consisted of the main cavern within the Sanctuary, once again in front of a fire, eating your own meals as the dragons below ate and exchanged fish. 
You were already packed, your mask secured as it had been for all two years you had been in this place stuck between confinement and dwelling. You almost regretted it, not telling her your name, but you couldn’t bear yourself to her knowing who she was, not truly. Not until you’d washed yourself of that particular weight. 
“Yes,” One day you would, if you ever saw her again. Once you were released from the heartache and pain of your own making, “I am. Thank you.”
You started out into the pale foggy sky,  mounted your beast as smooth as you’d ever done, which is to say, not smooth at all. You’d only ever managed it right when Valka was watching, anyhow. It was odd how that worked, maybe the peer pressure was finally starting to kick in.
As you took off and the sanctuary became smaller and smaller both to your eyes and your mind, as the tight bundle of chains in your chest dropped and the world opened up to you once more, you felt light, and free. 
Once again, there was no one to watch you and no one to hurt for besides your and your dragon. Endless opportunity. Thousands of ways to keep going.
You wondered what your face looked like.
You couldn’t wait to see it again.
Hiccup traced the faint outline of a Night Fury in the ice with his fingertips.
He tried to suppress the bubbling hope and dread at the thought his mother had been lying to him and his father about being alone all those years.
 He had left to get some air and to give his parents time together to linger while the snowstorm outside abated, taking shelter under a misty overhang of ice just off one of the tunnels leading back into the main dwelling. One that had fortunately not fallen victim to the heavy layers of snow drowning the uncovered surfaces below. 
Toothless had followed him out, of course, and sniffled curiously at the ground, giving the other few doodles littered across the ice an inspection of his own. Hiccup sat back, covering his mouth with his hand as he mulled over the implications.
He then stood, staring back into the tunnel leading back into the sanctuary. Much of the awe he had felt earlier at the discovery of his mother had washed away and a wave of uncertainty and hurt replaced it.
He knew he had been given grace. A lot more than he deserved. 
Since everything had changed, terrible mistakes became minor inconveniences. People no longer whispered about Hiccup the weird, Hiccup the Useless, the Hiccup who just didn’t get it. Rather, every jest on his behalf was now just another one of his strange little quirks. 
He did his part. He was happy to have a part now. A real one.
(He’d had a part. Blacksmith, inventor, friend.)
(Mistake.)
He thought they’d do the same for you. But you weren’t doing well. Even though he was busy with his new role, he noticed. He noticed when you fell behind, when you still couldn’t seem to find your place.
(His father, looking at him with shining eyes.)
He begged for you to not fumble this chance that you both had to be different. To be a part of something real, something tangible.
(He was so proud.)
Except. 
(It made him sick.)
He knew what it was like. To be the odd one out, to not be able to do things quite the way you were supposed to. After all, if he hadn’t had Toothless then he would still be the same old Hiccup. 
(He felt like the same old Hiccup.)
So yeah, it made sense that you weren’t always the first on call. It made sense, when you lagged behind. Why you weren’t part of the group the same way everyone else was. 
(Was he?)
Like a wall had been shattered and the curtains pulled, he’d been witness to some of the moments between the other Dragon Riders he’d not been included in when he was ‘other.’ Moments that he just couldn’t quite indulge in, that used to be aimed at him, that caused something ugly and sad to curl tight in his stomach.
That left the sour taste of stomach acid on his tongue that he couldn’t wash away, no matter what he drank or how many times he tried.
So he vouched for you when the whispers started. Hounded them until they stopped, despite the creeping feeling that they were right. Clung tightly onto the few moments you were able to spend together. The way things used to be.
(Pushed down the tiny voice telling him he still didn’t belong.)
Days. It took days for them to notice you were gone. Truly gone. And they couldn’t be sure at all when it had happened, what or why. 
They assumed you were dead. Once the next devastating winter set in, there was no way you could have made it on your own.
They locked your hut. An empty grave. The key, he’d taken and melted down into other things.
But. there was always a but.
Hiccup was a good handyman. For the most part. He’d caused a lot of handy-requiring, meaning he’d had a lot of practice.
He broke your lock.
Hiccup stared down at the piles of maps, noted, traced and copied sprawled across your desk, pulled out from underneath a loose floorboard by your bed. He clenched the various compasses and sea charts hidden in drawers and carelessly thrown under dishware.
 It turned out you had a lot of free time on your hands. 
There was something missing. Something missed when the other riders would joke and prod, wielding inside jokes he’d never been privy to just as easily as they wielded swords and hammers. And now he had no one to share with when they did.
There was something missing late at night working on a new tailfin, or a rig, or early in the morning when he was too tired to piece metal jigs together.
It just wasn’t the same, going to Fishlegs or Snotlout with these things, and heaven knows that Astrid wouldn’t entertain the idea at all. It was the dragons that appealed to her most. She was an early riser and an early sleeper and for many reasons she appealed to him, but she just couldn’t be what Hiccup needed. Not then.
You faded away as if you were a ghost, a door to a room no one used.
They didn’t get how it felt to spend all those years being the odd one out. He needed someone who got it. He needed someone who got him. A friend.
And like a note in the margins of a bad story, eventually no one mentioned you at all.
He flew as far and as fast as he could. Mapping the world, exploring farther and farther, as if he might somehow be able to trace your footsteps, following a lost trail that one day a long time ago you might have paved.
He’d flown as if, once he’d flown far enough, he might have been able to understand where you’d gone. 
(Why you left him.)
They figured a way to identify dragons through scale patterns. It was a skill Fishlegs had perfected first, taking vague, long held knowledge and putting it into practice, doing the math.
Hiccup ran his hand down the side of this dragon, eyeing the torn wings, the spiked crown. The jaw.
Recording its age, its gender, his place of origin.
“You know this dragon?” Valka asked cautiously. Distrustfully. She was leaning against her staff, face guarded. He didn’t need to look to know that last bit, he heard it just fine. 
Hiccup furrowed his brow. Two fish, a scratch under the chin. Dragon nip, a saddle, carefully woven and tenderly worn.
“I trained it.”
Hiccup leaned forward against Toothless, urging him ever onwards against the rough, buffeting winds and vicious onslaught of snow. Higher and higher until they cut above the clouds, breaching the threshold of the storm, evading it altogether.
Your absence had long since become an idea. Your person, a concept that eluded him time and time again, as inescapable yet unreachable as his own grieving heart.
But now, with the news from his father, his mother… he’d set out immediately, with not a word to spare despite Gobber warning him of the oncoming storm.
You were only two days departed. Two days out, a mirage turned real and he pursued it with all the desperation of a child. Finally, nearly, you were almost tangible. Reachable, physical, real.
There was no telling how far you’d gone or how far you’d go if you’d been given the chance to flee. He needed to catch up, catch you, see you. 
Happy to be on your own again, you’d taken a few days rest just outside of Valka’s territory. You didn’t expect to be caught off guard like that. You didn’t expect to be found, even by accident. It was just your luck.
“Damn it!” Peering from around the bend, you spotted a man. And he was a man now, a long shot away from the kids you two were. 
He was masked, hidden just out of view inside the crack between a rocky craig, where you’d set up camp. However the unmistakable form of Toothless followed suit as the two fought the wind and storm, searching for shelter.  
You brushed your hand over your own mask, your dragon breathing over your shoulder as it too surveyed the newcomers. They had crash landed quite suddenly and you’d rushed to compensate, hiding before they could notice. Hopefully they hadn’t noticed. He nor Toothless wouldn’t ever notice, not if you played your cards right.
You wondered if he remembered you at all. If he knew or if he’d ever had the mind to think about you. What brought him here. Maybe he’d just been chasing a whim. You pushed back a large animal skull with your foot, the mangled remnants of your attempt to fashion a new helmet with no face.
Toothless shook his head, looking at Hiccup sourly as they trudged on towards an outcropping near the center of the small island they’d found themselves on. 
Hiccup rubbed his arms grievously, staring out towards the sea, not sure the place wouldn’t be overtaken should a particularly large wave come to shore. There was no way he’d be able to catch up to you now, not in this rough weather. He prayed that the storm would give but the chances of that were low and he had little hope.
He stumbled slightly as he was buffeted forwards, finally making it to the entrance of a nigh hidden, narrow space carved into a crack in the large rock. Toothless snuffled at his back, urging him forward, though he had to take pause at the entrance as he spotted movement in the back.
A dragon? Or…
You hadn’t played your cards right.
You cursed as you ran further into the cave and towards the opening you knew lay at the back, your dragon already there, packed and ready. You had to run back after the realization you’d forgotten your dagger, which you probably should have just left behind.
“Hey, wait!”
 You grit your teeth as Hiccup made chase, running past your dead fire and crumbling fish bones. You would have been caught had the passage not been too narrow for him and Toothless to run side-by-side. It was just luck that he hadn’t yet thought to jump back onto his saddle.
You increased your speed as the passage started to open up and swung onto your own dragon, kicking off and just missing Hiccup as he skidded to a stop. Toothless lept in front of him right after. 
You could just imagine the two of them vaulting into the sky, a common scene turned frightening image as you and your own dragon bolted.
You’d had plenty of experience flying through this kind of weather. You hadn’t always, and the vikings on Berk hadn’t much at all, choosing to hole up with their dragons when the snow got too rough.
It gave you the advantage, one you needed if Hiccup decided to follow. There was no way to tell with the snow this thick, and with Toothless, he’d be nearly impossible to outmaneuver. You stayed under the clouds, hoping to keep your cover, as traveling into the open sky now would most definitely give you away.
What you could make out below between flurries of hail and flakes was nothing but open ocean and large mountains of ice, which passed you by in less than an instant as you sped as far away as possible, using the winds to uplift instead of hindering you. 
You scanned the area around you, looking for a sound place to escape and hide. Something caught your eye but just barely and you swooped downwards.
With what happened next, you might have been caught off guard had it not been for the yelling you could make out just barely above the wind. Instead you were just incredibly scared as a large mass spiraled into you, sending the four of you tumbling and screaming down into the cavern below.
Through the vertigo you were able to kick Hiccup, untangling your limbs with force as your dragon took unsteadily to the air again.
“Wait- Come back!” He shouted, leaning forwards, arm extended towards you. Toothless roared.
“No!” You yelled stubbornly back as you twisted to glare at him through your mask.
Regrettably, it seems that the Night Fury remained undefeated in terms of speed and inescapability as he soon caught up to you again, Toothless grabbing onto your dragon’s tail and with a hard yank, forcing your landing onto a nearby ledge, large and long enough to facilitate your rough spill and roll against hard gravel. 
Your mask cracked as it was thrown against the ground, loudly echoing as it clattered against hard stone.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to- It was really rough out there, and I-” Hiccup stumbled to his feet, shaking his mechanical foot out of Toothless’ saddle, heart pounding as you looked up at him behind scraggly hair, crouched a good few strides forwards
He’d found the experience novel when he’d seen it on his Dad, an outsider looking in. But to experience it firsthand… He knew what his father meant, when he said ‘You’re as beautiful as the day I lost you.’
Even seeing you as messed up and wild as you were squeezed his breath out of his chest. Maybe even made you more… Whatever this was. Whatever you were to him. 
You definitely looked different, a little older, features more defined, but he’d die before he’d cease to recognize that face.
He had to shut his mouth, lips pursed as if to hold back all the memories flooding back into his mind, faster than the winds blowing up on the surface. You two, as kids in the meadows, complaining about life and dads, sneaking around the Great Hall, causing messes and being scolded.
He realized what it was that he’d felt and missed so deeply. It was something he’d known, hidden so deep inside, realized much too late.
You held back tears as the life you’d tried so hard to forget had finally caught up to you. Within an instant, this new life you had built for yourself had completely fallen apart.
You saw the man- because you begged for it not to be him, and you’d exhausted all your avenues, and the only option you had left was denial, took a shaky step forward, pulling his helmet back over his head with both hands, revealing a face lathered in sweat despite the cool conditions.
Trolls.
“Why…” Your voice, scratchy and ragged, was easily heard despite your whispering as there was nothing else to be heard, “Are you here?”
“Why… Am I…?” Hiccup asked incredulously, staring at you wide-eyed.
“Yes!” You shout, shoving the hair out of your face as you stood abruptly, “What in the world are you doing here?” Your dragon, laying behind you, began to stand, cautiously crouching against the ground.
“I came looking for you!” He looked like you’d kicked his puppy. You bared your teeth at him.
“You came looking for me? You chased me through a storm like a maniac! Can’t you take a hint?! Gods,” You grip your shoulder, “You probably broke my shoulder, curse it!”
“I’m sorry- I’m sorry I hurt you, that I-” Hiccup stepped forward. Toothless growled, behind him, “But you left! What was I supposed to do with that?”
“What you were supposed to do with that? You tackled me to the ground!” It had been so long.
“You didn’t even say goodbye!”
“You’re mad about goodbyes? Was the goodbye I gave you not good enough?!” He had scruff now, a light dusting of peach fuzz spotting along his chin. His hair was redder, his eyes greener. Or maybe that was the lighting.
“You went missing for two years! So I chased after you. Who wouldn’t? In what world would ‘I’ll see you later’ ever be enough? Ever?” It’s not like he ever gave you a goodbye. Not before he’d left you in the dust.
“I was hurt! And what are you- how do you even remember that, anyways?” You scoff loudly. But in the end he was still the same boy. He would have taken anyone else at their whim as a friend or otherwise. Yet he didn’t even recognize your companionship or your silly little crush. Wasn’t that disheartening?
Hiccup stomped forwards, causing you to step back. Your dragon snarled and followed as Toothless began to circle, trapping you and Hiccup in the middle of a very dangerous tango.
“How could I-? You’d- Just- Have you ever considered that maybe I was hurting, too? I spent so long just trying to fix- everything! I spent so long doing, and then you just leave and I can’t do anything about it! Do you know how painful that was? Why didn’t- why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you talk to me? Why?” He had worked hard. So, so hard.
 He probably would have chosen Ruffnut’s hand over yours. He thought she was terrible.
“Why?” You asked him, throwing your arms out, squishing the little ball of guilt worming around in your stomach, “Why didn’t you talk to me? Do you know how much it hurt, to be constantly left behind like- like your old scraps, and maybe I got tired of hearing about it! Hearing about all of it! Your standing, your dad, your stupid girlfriend! Could you not just be happy with what you had?”
“What-”
He did get Astrid, though. He pursued her even though, for the longest time, she remained just ever so out of his league. The same way he was and wasn’t out of yours. Yeah, you were jealous. So, so jealous.
Of her, of his cousin and all his other friends for pushing you around and squeezing you out of his life. You were mad at him for letting them, after all they’d done to the both of you.
“I got made fun of! All the damn time! And your head was so full of air- you were too busy jerking your own ego to notice!” Your eyes stung as you shouted at him.
“Up my own ego!” Hiccup stopped, “No one wanted me as I was. I spent so long trying to make everything work for everyone else! What I had-I wanted you to have it too! So why? Why did you leave?”
“You say that, but-” You grimace and, “Shouldn’t it be obvious? Maybe I didn't want that! Did- did you ever stop to consider that maybe I wanted you? You didn’t have to make anything up for me! You-! It was all about you!”
“I- Honestly, you have to- All my life, I-”
“I have to what?! We had the same life, Hiccup!”
“I know!” Hiccup squeezed his eyes shut tightly. Then, quicker than you could react, he grabbed you by your upper arm and pulled you closer just enough- It wasn’t pleasant at all, all force and teeth against lip. But the next one.
He pulled back, readjusted and you slipped together seamlessly. Closed-mouthed, but he clearly knew what he was doing, kissing you that way. You held onto his elbows, unmoving yet still, frozen by shock. He’d gotten his practice in with Astrid. 
The thought sent a wave of fury down your spine. You punched him.
He reared back from the blow, accepting yet more startled than physically hurt as, just like him, you’d never had much muscle. Still, you’d left what was quickly becoming a nice red welt on his face.
 Your dragons stared at the both of you in shock, yours more in confusion than Toothless. There weren’t many Vikings in the sanctuary, so the meaning behind the gesture, the punch and the kiss, was probably lost.
“I thought…” He mumbled, eyes wide again, speaking as though whatever just happened, hadn’t, “I thought everything was fine. Fine enough. Between us.” You looked at him, the place where your heart used to be all twisted up and torn.
He was a liar. He was a liar, and you wouldn’t let him one over you. Not again. You didn’t want him to, more than anything else.
In spite of that, emotionally and physically, you were exhausted. You could only manage sadness. You weren’t sure you had the energy to push him away. 
“You thought wrong.” You didn’t want to speak to him at all.
“Please, don’t-” he fell apart, voice hushed and cracking as he spoke. He took the final step towards you, burying his head against your shoulder. You stood stiff, staring out over into the scenery beyond his back and yet unseeing.
It was weird, having said everything you’d needed to say, that you’d bottled up for so many years. It defined you for so long that having it all out in the open kind of made you feel like you’d lost something essential.
“I see it. I see it now. I really do,” He whispered that last part tearfully, fingers gripping weakly onto the fabric of your sleeves. You felt as though a stiff breeze might blow him away, “Please, don’t leave me. Not again.” 
He couldn’t say that.
“I can’t let you go again,” He really couldn’t say that.
“Just... Just tell me what you want.” He couldn’t say that, either. Toothless shot you a scathing glare, your dragon all but forgotten as he tugged Hiccup back. Your dragon unfurled its wings behind you, standing tall and proud as he pulled away towards the entrance to the cavern. 
You met Hiccup’s gaze.
“Just do me this.” You choked out, watching as his expression switched from despaired to flat and back again, “Go away,”
 “Please.” You said.
And he did. He turned tail and ran.
It was over.
As he flew away on Toothless, becoming nothing but a pinprick in your periphery before finally disappearing up the cavern entrance, you fell back down onto your knees. 
You weren’t sure what to do anymore. The most important decision of your life was made with his ghost nipping at your heels. Truly, he haunted you. Whether he was with you or not, he always haunted you.
But the dragons here, untouched by the outside world, were kind. And curious. Once the threat was gone and the commotion was over, many came over to examine the newcomers, sniffing and prodding at you and your things.
They were welcoming enough. So you set up shop.
Hiccup laid flat against his bed, staring at the ceiling of his childhood home. He felt torn in every single direction all at once.
He’d left when his people needed him. When his father had needed him. Drago had attacked while he’d been gone, and all that was left of the sanctuary now was rubble. Then he’d gone after Berk. Hiccup had only just gotten there in time.
His father was fine, his mother… alive. After twenty years. Everyone was accounted for, but what if they hadn’t been? If he’d been there, maybe there would have been less damage, less people hurt.
But he wouldn’t have found you if he’d stayed. Finally, after all this time. He'd realized how long it truly had been since you left, lost to him even before you’d actually run off on your… the, nadder.
The floorboards creaked as someone made their way up the stairs to the loft, the front door swinging shut behind him. Hiccup didn’t move, just glancing to the side to see who it was that came to get him this time.
“Astrid,” He sighed. The two of them were distant and had been for a long while, despite the fact that they were supposed to be in a relationship. He’d been off a lot for that whole long while, which she hadn’t much minded as she’d found herself more interested in other things. And… he’d found his heart had a new owner.
“It’s been a month, Hiccup,” She rolled her head back, exhausted, as if reciting a tired script that she’d been reading off for ages, one that no one wanted to listen to anymore,  “Everyone is fine. You don’t have to hole up so often. I don’t know why you did it, but no one is mad you left, you know. You couldn’t have known.”
“Yeah…” Hiccup sighed, “Yeah, I know.”
“You need to get out,” She looked around his room, which was very much a mess of parts and papers, and ran her hand down a large map, laid flat over the only remotely clear space he had, his desk, “if you don’t next thing you know, a month’ll be four.”
“Why are you so obsessed with this place? … Does it have anything to do with the time you spent missing?” Astrid questioned. Hiccup propped himself up, turning over alarmed as he heard the sound of skin on paper. It had been freshly inked.
“No,” He’d guessed at where the two of you had ended up. He was sure that he’d be able to find it again, given the chance. He would. After he worked up the courage.
After all, you’d… You didn’t want to be found.
“Hey, wait, that’s-” He scrambled onto his one leg, kicking aside his prosthetic and jamming his toe in the process.
 “Ah, ow, ow, don’t touch that, please,” Astrid rolled her eyes and tossed the cylinder to his bed and he picked it up, examining it thoroughly as she sauntered off.
You weren’t sure why, but he kept coming back
“Hi,” He said awkwardly, shifting from foot to peg nervously. This was the first time he’d caught you. The first time he’d spotted you was the last but you’d made off that time before he could see you.
“Why are you here?” You stared at him, blank faced. Why didn’t you leave, curse it.
Your dragon waved its tail playful from the side, waiting for Hiccup to go. The other ones wouldn’t come out while he was here.  It felt good in a vindictive sort of way, because dragons had always been this thing, except this time you were the one with the secret dragon knowledge. And the upper hand. Sort of. They didn’t hide from you.
“I like… “ He flushed, “I like hearing you talk?”
“Sure,” You suggested, turning and starting off again, basket under arm and over rock as you began unsteadily making your way back up to home cave. You liked it there because you didn’t have to leave much for anything.
“Wait, wait, wait wait,” Hiccup stuttered. As you had your arms over a particularly steep ledge, your legs waved nonsensically and scrambled against the side as you searched for a foot grip, “Just, uh, let me-”
“Come back tomorrow,” You grunted after you managed to finally get one leg up the side. You’d probably figure out what to say by then.
You felt better here, like maybe you weren’t meant for people. Not for dragons either, not really.  The dragons here didn’t need defending or anything, it’s not like there was anyone down here to defend against besides other dragons. The most you’d had to go out for was food, and even that was made or stolen easily enough.
Being here gave you enough time to make you think that maybe you were meant just for yourself. 
You sat by the spray by the falls, enjoying the mist as it sprayed onto your face and the echoing sounds of the water hitting gray stone. 
“Toothless, come on- Just please, I know you don’t want- but-” Your eyes shot open, the distant voice of Hiccup bounced around the empty cavern, your moment ruined.
You looked around for the pair, trying to figure out which direction you should be running before. Suddenly, it felt like you’d been drenched by a whole lot more than a mist as Toothless landed messily behind you.
“What are you doing here?” You were careful to keep your balance as you shuffled further inland, looking a lot like a drenched cat as you came face-to-face with an also sopping wet Hiccup
You would never be rid of him.
“You said to come back tomorrow?” He asked, twisting his fingers and very purposefully refusing to look you in the eye.
Of course, you hadn’t figured out what to say.
You blew a raspberry as you adjusted the stolen, waterlogged basket which you had, again, under your arm. You needed more than two pairs of clothes.
“...Come back later,” You grumbled, “Later than tomorrow.”
You’d been free for a week. You’d been hoping for maybe two, to be frank.
“Please, I just-” Hiccup huffed, traveling by foot while you rode your dragon. Toothless followed behind, grumbling and gurgling at Hiccup judgmentally. Clearly whatever good will you’d built up with him before you ran left had been more than lost.
“I’m not interested in whatever you’re selling,” You stare straight ahead, over the encroaching cliff, ducking round and under ledges as your dragon trotted onwards.
“I want to get to know you, again.”
Eventually, the cave dragons had warmed up to Hiccup and he was able to work his magic on them. Now they watched through stalagmites and stalactites with impassive eyes as he made chase.
“Uh huh,” You scoffed as you reached the edge of the ledge. You turned around and stuck out your tongue as your dragon took a violent leap into the open air. As the wind whistled around you, you pinwheeled your arms in an effort to try and keep balance.
“Come on, Toothless, bud,” Hiccup complained from way behind. You saw Toothless very decidedly sit down, refusing to move even as Hiccup tried to push him towards the cliff with his whole upper body, “Let’s go.”
“So,” Hiccup started, “You haven’t gone any deeper.”
The both of you stared out into the vast, glowing sea of  towers and gigantic glowing mushrooms extending out of their jagged rock faces. In the distance you could spot gigantic crystals, protruding from the ground the same way the sanctuary did. 
Seas of dragons crowed and chirped, bright patterns shifting and growing under hard muscle. It was very dizzying, if you were going to be honest.
“No,” You replied, “No, I haven’t. Not this far, but now I… I might.”
You hadn’t traveled too far into the cavern, deciding not to push your luck with the locals. You always figured there was some sort of nest farther in. Turns out there was, and a whole lot more locals than you expected, and a lot more to this small world besides the cold, empty cavern. At least you didn’t have to worry about flooding anymore. Or sea salt in your hair.
You swore to yourself that you were going to move further in, caught off guard and most definitely embarrassed at the fact that so much open space had been hiding right under your nose. 
Free for three days.
“There has to be more. There’s no way- It doesn’t make sense how all these different kinds of dragons can live in the same environment. There’s- there’s so much here that-Gods, I have to map it,” Hiccup rambled, smiling gawkily.
He’d been here for a week.
You felt a pressure to supervise him as he ran rampant in your new home, unsure of when he’d become such a cartographer. Your dragons had gone missing a while ago, leaving you two to be babysat by the hands of the general public.
You watched as he painstakingly mapped each pillar, occasionally chiming in with your own advice, looking the same way he did the day he discovered honey when you were kids. It was almost pleasant.
The two of you had fallen off the edge of a pillar after being knocked down during a spat between two touchy Crimson Goregutters, which no Hiccup magic or dragon secret could stop. After an event with a vine, dangling over certain death and panic, you two had managed to swing your way onto a large glowing mushroom. 
The downside to that was that now, you were stuck, owed to the fact that apparently, what made some of these mushrooms glow was very viscous and… sticky. 
Hiccup’s arms were glued to the space on both sides of your head, and your hands were gripping his arms which were visibly shivering, because you two had been stuck like this for a while. You’d been tugged, prodded at and licked by various different dragons. Nothing helped and you were starting to think that maybe this was how you were going to die. 
Well, you knew you weren't going to go to Valhalla. It was kind of really hard to die in battle if you spent most of your time avoiding people. But this just sucked.
“What's up with your pathological need to map everything?” You asked belligerently. To be honest, it didn’t really bother you. Hiccup’s rambling had never bothered you, because you were prone to rambling in the same exact way. Currently though you were hard pressed to find anyone else to hear it. 
“I thought your thing was the forge? You spent half of my childhood there.”
“Well, yeah, I…” He rested his forehead against yours, eyes shut as his neck finally gave out, you weren’t too pleased as you felt his sweat drip onto your face, squirming rebelliously.
 “Wasn’t sure if you’d want to hear it. I-I could talk about that instead?” No talking at all would be great.
 “Yeah,” You gave in, closing your eyes and going limp against the slimy fungi, “That would be better.”
Lips pursed, then grimaced as he’d opened his mouth to speak. Nothing came out, though. He just stared above your head, unmoving. You tried to see what he was looking at, but only got an eyeful of his scruff.
Next thing you know, you’re being smothered by a plushy pink tongue, then just licked and nosed a little bit. The spit of this dragon doing something odd to dissolve the slime trapping the two of you, fizzing as it touched shiny goo. When you finally had the facilities to move, you flipped your head back and your eyes widened slightly.
It looked like the two of you had just found Toothless a girlfriend.
Three months, two days and five visits- no, seven. Nine? Eleven? Seventeen?
“I don’t actually have a problem… with the mapping. Talking about it.”
You two were nestled between a rock and another rock, though this time whether it was a result of purpose or chance remained uncertain. You couldn’t remember. You were after something… There was barely any space between the two of you. You had been talking.
There was barely any green to Hiccup’s eyes, most of his iris consumed by large pupils as he mouthed around works that looked suspiciously like, “Can I…?”
Instead, he leaned forwards and your foreheads touched, the same way they did when you were trapped before. His eyes were clenched shut as he uttered, “I love you.”
 You had a hard time believing that.
You turned your head to the side. 
“I wonder how Astrid feels about her boyfriend flying off and doing who knows what.”
Some of the wild dragons lay in front of you, licking at the dying fire by your feet. A terror lay in the middle of it. You’d lined it with stones which were now giving off a pleasant warmth.
“I doubt she’d mind. We’re not really… together anymore. I don’t think so. I wouldn’t… I wouldn’t want to be.”
“Right,” You raised an eyebrow at him skeptically. 
“Not since a little while after you left, actually.”
You found that hard to believe too, as you shook the burnt slice of fish off your knife onto your burnt slice of bread. You weren’t much better than Valka at cooking, but you were getting better. It was something about that sanctuary, or maybe something about that woman that just made you worse at cooking.
Hiccup wrinkled his nose over on the other side of your log as he shook his head at you.
It was a petty, but bitter sort of revenge. 
Your first kiss had been lost to a fair bloke- his words, not yours- in the middle-of-nowhere inn. It had been a long time since you’d been out, but you were sure you’d easily be able to find somewhere similar to lose some other things. Hiccup had your heart but you’d never give him the opportunity to take any of your firsts.
Two months.
You were angry at him for playing with your heart again.
“There was a crisis-Berk…” His voice cracked.
 You looked disinterestedly out over uncanny black waters. “Yeah, It’s fine.”
Seven days, seven visits. He might have been camping aboveground.
The two of you were between two large red fungi, settled on a mossy rock overlooking a new, larger, unmapped maze of rock pillars and black water rushing below. Dragons, glowing and colorful, mingled together off in the distance. Toothless was probably one, gone off to frolic with his new lady love.
“You never wanted me. As a friend, as a- …battle buddy, or as anything else. You would never have chosen me for anything. And I just… I didn’t want to be just what you settled for,” You mumbled into your knees, “You spent so long searching for better, and then you found it, and it just really hurt to realize that I wasn’t a part of that.” 
You spilt your heart out as you faced the cliffside. Hiccup was facing you. You didn’t care what he heard. None of this was real anyways.
“I’m sorry,” Hiccup repeated, clenching his eyes shut as he buried his nose into your shoulder, barely there though he had to crane his head forwards, due to the uncomfortable angle. 
What he had with Astrid these past few years, that was real. That was history. This thing between the two of you was just a mess of pain and turmoil and a little bit of childhood fantasy. An old infatuation rearing its head as you got everything nasty out of your system.
“It hurt to think that-That… the one person- Like everyone else did, you didn’t think I was good enough either.”
“I’m sorry.” You felt his arms come around your sides awkwardly before he squeezed.
“Me too. I…”
He’d remember that he didn’t want-need- you again soon enough.
“I haven’t told anyone. About you, or this place.”
“You haven’t?” You’d actually expected otherwise. It was nice to know you weren’t at risk of getting dropped in on.
Two months, thirty two visits.
You might be coming around to him.
“You’ve already-?” He asked, a little startled. You still felt a little silly about it but after you’d done it, you figured it wasn’t that big of a deal. It wasn’t like you’d planned to marry or anything anyways, so his reaction was kind of funny.
“Yeah, I was pretty mad. So I went out, and… you know. It was a while ago, though.” 
He looked a little disheartened at the idea, but he just scoffed, waving his hand off in your direction.
“What? You and Astrid kissed, yeah, but you haven’t done- anything? Not even before you ‘totally broke up,’” You didn’t have to specify what they hadn’t done, the innuendo was already pretty obvious.
“Nah.” Hiccup said, hair wiped out of his face, matched squares of parchment. Map pieces were strewn out in front of him as he made himself busy trying to create a complete chart of the underground, matching up the landscape he saw with the islands above it.
 Unfortunately, the caverns seemed to stretch on forever and the islands only covered so much.
Three months, one day, thirty two hours. 
You straddled him, crinkling some of the many, many blueprints scattered across the moss surface. You wiggled one out from under him, looking down as he looked up. It felt good, being the one in charge for once.
You leaned down, pressing your noses together. Just before, you’d been going over his things. His blueprints. Swapping ideas. Sharing minds. Like you used to, every single day. Like you’d been doing, almost every single day.
“Do you love me?” You asked.
Every day you’d been together. Your knees touched, shoulders pressed close together.
You had to know. And if he did… He had to mean it. 
You played games, shared stories. You’d grappled and curled, not the way vikings could, but the way two hiccups did, a long, long time ago. 
If he didn’t, well… You had all the time in the world to leave, to start again. But you didn’t think you could. You could go weeks without seeing him, and then sometimes it would be every other day. 
This was it.
“I do love you,” He choked out, wheezing as you adjusted, your weight pressing against his chest. He glanced back at you, crumbling a little bit. 
He spent a lot of time here, now. A lot more than before. With the time spent traveling in between, as he said it, it was a wonder he got anything done there at all. Most of his time was spent above mapping the islands or down here with you.
You read what his body language told you; he was insecure. 
“... Do you love me?”
“I do.” Hesitantly, you nodded, “I do.” Was that even a question?
You trusted him. You didn’t trust him. You had no way to know if he stabbed you in the back again. Went back to Astrid. You didn’t really have a way to know if that’s what he did, every time he left. 
You loved him, didn’t you?
He didn’t know that? Maybe not always and not all at once, since you left. You hadn’t done a very good job of making him know it. You hadn’t a lot of reason to. 
Did you love him now?
You marveled at how easy it was to be around him, with him. It wasn’t the same as it was before, but it was still good. It could almost be better. You, against everything, wanted it. You wanted it so bad.
“I’d leave it all behind, for you,” Hiccup said.
You would make him know it.
“You would?” You asked, “Would you?”
You laid your heart bare to him, stitched and spiked. And you, as he said it, implied it, maybe you held his. 
“Do you want me to?” He asked. He tugged lightly on one of the draws to your tunic, faking interest in it as he worried the inside of his cheek. You didn’t want his home, or his family. 
“I don’t want anything,” You scoffed dismissively. You wanted his honesty. You wanted to know that he was yours. Yours truly. That was it.
Prove it. You urged him on, Prove it to me. 
He smiled that goofy, awkward smile, half teeth and all closed at the edges. You could tell he was trying hard not to falter. You hadn’t seen that smile in such a long time.
Know me, You asked.
“So… Do you? Do you love me?” He asked again, offering his hand up to your face. His fingers were scabbed, and dirty and you leaned into his palm, pushing it down as he tangled his fingers clumsily into the roots of your hair. You pressed your lips together, again, again and over again until neither of you could breathe. 
Have me, You pleaded.
“I do,” You gasped into his mouth, “I really, really do.” You offered no resistance. Not this time.
Love me. 
There was no coming back.
(Deep in your mind, you wondered if maybe, possibly, he already did.)
Twelve months. Twelve months since he’d found you.
Hiccup stood at the edge of Berk, armor packed away in favor of a lighter tunic. He often wondered what it would have been like, if he’d really run away with you like he’d intended.
If things would have ended up the same. 
Would he have seen you in time? In time for what he had now? For this? 
No. no, probably not. 
His father would notice. His mother might.
His father was fine. And now he had his mother. They were old, but they were tough. They could have a new kid. Or maybe they’d convince Snotlout or Astrid to take the mantle. 
They’d-everyone-would be fine without him.Who was he kidding? He’d spent so long working so hard and they didn’t need him at all. And if he was honest, He didn’t need them. 
He didn’t really care. Not anymore. He let go.
Life would go on just fine without him, just as it did before him and just as it would long after his name was lost to time. His distance only proved it. He spent so long away he’d been practically excommunicated again.
After a little bit of irritation, his travels became just another one of his quirks. 
‘Oh, look, there’s Hiccup. Oh, well, he’s off again.’ He was barely missed. And rightly so. It was by his own doing, really. That was fine by him. In fact, It worked in his favor.
It was borderline hysterical how, the moment they found more furies, and his new paramour, Toothless went from devil’s advocate to his most eager accomplice. 
The Sand Wraiths were especially cool… It cost him a lot less fish to get there now. To you.
Sometimes he had to wonder why he’d been so attached to Berk. Working for things that ultimately, he didn’t care about. Everything that kept him here, he also had with you. When he was here, all he wanted was to go back out.
A pebble-sized ball of guilt coil in his stomach. It used to be worse. But, he’d talked to you about it. The engagement.
The engagement with Astrid. The one that was basically moot at this point, anyways. She might even slap him if he brought it up, to expect anything after he’d left her for so long. Truly, officially. all he’d had to do was end it. He left a letter nearby her family home; they would find it if they bothered to search for him.
A scummy trick, yes. Was he a coward for doing it? Maybe. But he was a smart coward. He wasn’t lying when he’d told you that no one knew.
Hiccup exhaled, bouncing up and down on his heel and peg, as if to psych himself up. To dispel all of his nervous, excited energy.
It was a clear day, no risk of a storm. He strapped his saddle pack to Toothless. It was only slightly larger than usual, so as not to arouse suspicion, of course, but it held all of his essentials. Leatherworking tools, metalworking tools, more tools, his armor, spare armor, spare foot, spare charcoal. The small plush his mother had made for him as a child. His viking helmet, for memory’s sake.
Slung over his shoulder was a smaller pack with just his compass and his coin. 
As the two of you grew closer and closer, it only made his decision more and more certain.
He wasn’t meant to be Chief. He wasn’t cut out for this life at all. He didn’t want this life. He wanted you. 
As far as anyone else was concerned, you’d long since disappeared and now he had the feeling it was time for him to do the same.
He took a deep breath, one that pushed his lungs to his ribs. Then like his bag, he flung himself over Toothless’ saddle before he took off from Berk for the last time, closing his eyes. He’d left his helmet off this time so he felt the beating wind rip through his hair.
The two of you were there, half hidden from view under a large red plume. It was wasm, and your perspiring skin was trapped under hollow armor, same as his. 
You gasped, hot air mingling every time his breath hit your face. The two of you huffed and panted as he pushed you unto the dirt and you pushed back, feeling the moss tickle your face and the backs of your hand. 
Not your back, though. Just hands. 
Gripped, interlaced fingers pressed firmly down by your head, sweaty palms melded to his. He’d been the one in charge, today.
He was hunched over you, his trousers unbuckled and unlaced as he pressed downwards, forwards, gently and not.
A line of sweat ran down your cheek. Your eyelids fluttered. His breath caught.
Men shouted their battle cries into the dark, never ending sky as Berk was set in flames. A skull, still fresh with blood and exposed brain, broke with a sickening, wet crunch as Stoick ground his head into it, bringing mercy to the poor, damaged creature.
“There is no fury here,” He bellowed as he towered menacingly against the hulking wall of flames by his door. Three Deathgrippers and their tails lay cut, prone and slain around him. 
“We’ll see about that,” Grimmel crooned, standing tall with his hands linked behind his back, looking down on him with two more dragons hissing and spitting by his sides.
Sharp talons dug into the wood of the rafters, Cloudjumper’s head turning steering around as he hung by her feet. Valka, masked and fully covered, crouched down from where she was, nestled at the bend of his tail. She pulled her arms back, getting her hook, sharp and serrated, ready for a wicked swing.
Yes, he would see. She’d make sure of it.
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javierpena-inatacvest · 8 months
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Lunch
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Summary: Javi's rough start to the work week is turned around when he finds a surprise from his daughters in his lunch
Word Count: 3.1K (oops)
Paring: Dad!Javier Peña x Wife!reader (no use of y/n, reader's nickname is Osita)
Warnings: Literally nothing but sweet, sickening fluff, Javi being so in love with his family, Javi being the ultimate girl dad, a lot of glitter (?)
A/N: Our favorite family is back! I am a firm believer that Girl Dad!Javi keeps every single piece of artwork his daughters give to him and has a wall at his office dedicated to all of their drawings and crafts because he refuses to get rid of any of them 😭 I love them so much, they make me sick, your honor 🫡 unbeata bc that's just who I am, apologies in advance for the mistakes
Series Masterlist. Never Too Late Masterlist
4 hours into Monday and Javier Peña was already counting down the hours until Friday. It seemed like this week was going to have no problem giving Javi a swift kick in the ass back to reality after another blissful weekend with you and the girls, a grumpy frown falling upon his face, wishing he could rewind back just a few hours to when the biggest problems he was trying solved revolved around which book his daughters were picking out for bedtime, rather than strategy meetings on how to solve the better half of the southern drug trade still ranging in Mexico. 
Rubbing his hands over his face and pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers, Javi let out a sigh, grumbling low in his chest before running his hands through the dark curls of his hair, praying that the closed door of his office was enough to give his co-workers at the Laredo Sheriff's Department enough of a clue to let him at least try to enjoy his lunch in silence.  
Shuffling and stacking a few stray papers left out on his desk, Javi cleared a space for the brown paper sack he mindlessly pulled out of his work bag, plopping it in front of him without a second look. He shuffled through the pocket he knew he had an extra fork in somewhere, considering he was at the point of eating his lunch with nothing but his hands before venturing out to the common kitchen where the rest of his co-workers were, ready to disrupt the sacred silence and peace that was his lunch time. 
“Of course I forgot a fucking fork…” Javi grumbled to himself, abandoning his search in his bag after a few minutes, letting out another disappointed huff, leaning back in his chair and staring up at the speckled tiles of the ceiling. Javi was just about to get up, bracing himself for the perilous journey for a plastic fork he was about to embark on, when the corner of the lunch bag perched on his desk caught his eye. 
Was that… glitter?
As his gaze shifted down the rest of his bag, Javi’s impatient and bothered demeanor had quickly shifted, a soft smile growing between his cheeks, picking up the lunch sack that had very clearly been given a makeover by his daughters before disappearing into his work bag this morning. 
What was once a plain brown paper bag had somehow been turned into a hodgepodge of arts and crafts- glitter, pink and purple hearts, several stickers from separate collections of puppies, Star Wars, and unicorns, doodles and drawings from each of the girls, and a stray Batman band-aid that Harper must have added, considering the 17 she had covered herself in last night for fun. 
Quietly laughing to himself at his girl’s creation, Javi spent a few moments thoroughly examining all sides of the bag, his heart melting to read “Daddy’s Lunch- From Lucy, Elliot, Harper and Mommy” scribbled across the front. 
Carefully, Javi opened the top of the crinkly brown paper, revealing a plethora of surprising goodies inside, the first being a tiny stuffed cow and a fruit-by-the-foot that he obviously had no recollection of packing for himself last night. Setting the things down on his desk, Javi shuffled through the next added layer, this one consisting of another fruit-by-the-foot and a half eaten granola bar, which one of the girls clearly had gotten into before his lunch had departed from home.
 The last thing hiding lunch was a piece of paper that had been folded several times to fit inside the bag, Javi gently removing it with the rest of his surprise treasures. As he unfolded the now somewhat crumpled paper, the grin on his face began to grow wider and wider, seeing the colorful crayon creations doodled on the page. Before him, sat a paper with drawings of each of the girls done by themselves, perfectly embodying their tiny personalities. Lucy’s was neatly sketched and colored, and then outlined in a darker color to make the inside colors pop, Elliot’s had crazy scribbled hair and was holding a hockey stick in not one, but both hands, and Harpers was done in every color that the Crayola crayon box had to offer. 
As if their adorable self-portraits weren’t enough to have him in a puddle, in the middle of their artwork was a drawing of Javi standing between them with the words “We love you Daddy!”  etched in big, pink bubble letters above them. 
Javi had been so enamored by the art his daughters had made him, taking in every stroke and scribble on the page, he hadn’t noticed the smaller note that had fallen to his desk, your neat and careful handwriting etched across the paper. 
Jav,
3 little munchkins were very insistent on re-making Daddy’s lunch last night, and even more insistent on decorating your very boring brown bag. They told me that they were adding a few surprises to your lunch, so this is me apologizing in advance for any half eaten snacks or stuffed animals that may have ended up in there. I hope you have a great day, we all miss you lots and can’t wait to see you later. 
Love you lots, 
Osita 
Even though it was nothing but a few words scribbled down on a piece of paper and a drawing similar to one he had seen a thousand times before, it never failed to surprise Javi how something so small really did mean everything to him.  
Years ago, still working for the DEA, in the midst of chaos and corruption in Colombia, one of his former agents had always insisted on carrying his “lucky” drawing from his son in his back pocket on every mission he was sent on. Back then, the idea of carrying a colored, crumpled piece of paper in his jeans for good luck seemed like a somewhat ridiculous notion, but now, as Javi stared up at the bulletin board next to his desk, overflowing with drawings, paintings, and projects from his 3 daughters, he couldn’t imagine a world where he didn’t hold any gift from his girls so near and dear to his heart that he ever dared to let it go. 
Overlapping his newest artwork over the most recent crafts given to him to hang in his office, Javi hung today’s drawing at the front and center of the board, your note nestled next to it, beaming with pride at the love and and joy at how full his heart felt from a few simple pieces of paper. 
Admiring just a little longer before reaching over to the phone at the corner of his desk, Javi began to punch the familiar pattern of your home phone number on the receiver, patiently tapping his fingers as the line rang, the other hand grabbing his actual lunch food out of the flamboyantly decorated bag. 
“Hello?” 
“Hey baby, it’s me.” 
“Hi. Is everything okay?” You questioned cautiously, somewhat surprised by his mid-day work call. 
“No, everything is-” He paused, smiling back his lunch bag, “everything is great. I just had some time during lunch and wanted to see if the 3 stooges are around so I can say thank you for my lunch.” 
“Oh God, I almost forgot that was last night’s surprise project. How bad was it? I was only there to supervise lunch bag decorating because they were adamant they were more than capable than packing extra snacks for you.” You snickered, Javi practically almost able to see the hysterical look plastering your face through the phone, laughing right along with you at the adorable gifts they had left behind for him. 
“Well, I got…” Javi stopped, reaching back over in his pile of goodies, “two fruit-by-the-foots, a stuffed purple cow, and a half eaten granola bar that has Elliot written all over it.” 
“Is that Daddy? Did he get our lunch?! Did he like it?!” A chorus of little voices squealed in the background. 
“Why don’t you ask him yourself.” You snickered, the muffled and muted sounds of the phone being passed off to the girls rustling through the other end of the line as Javi nestled his phone between his ear and shoulder, beginning to open up his food as he waited for a response from his daughters. 
“Hi Daddy!” The 3 shouted through the phone in unison.
“Hola, pollitas! (Hi, little chickens) Thank you so much for my lunch today!” 
“Did you like the bag, Daddy? It was my idea to make it look pretty because the brown is so boring.” Lucy boasted, in her lovingly know-it-all tone, making sure her dad knew she was without a doubt, the ringleader of the lunchtime antics. 
“I added the extra snacks!” Elliot chimed in, making sure her voice was well pronounced through the phone ensuring that Javi could her her contributions. 
“I helped-ed too!” Harper interrupted, trying to butt in over her sisters. 
“Well, Mommy helped a little bit too, but it was mostly us!” 
“Was it a surprise, Daddy?” 
“Best surprise I’ve had in a very long time. I already put your drawing up on my board so everyone can see your beautiful artwork. I think everyone at work is gonna start thinking I have professional artists that live in my house.” Javi’s cheeks were already sore from the goofy grin that was only getting wider every second he listened to his daughter’s sweet little voices on the phone, the girls erupting in a fit of giggles at his compliment. “Los amos mucho, morritas (I love you so much, kiddos).” 
“Hey Boss, you gotta second, I-” Agent Carter half knocked, opening Javi’s office door, stopping in his tracks as he met Javi’s cheerful grin turned death glare upon his arrival, slowly retracting his steps while Javi let out a scornful sigh, holding his hand out to get Carter to at least let him wrap up before dealing with whatever bullshit was coming his way. 
“Hey pollitas? Daddy has to get back to work, but I’ll see you in a little bit when I get home, okay? I love you so much. Can you pass the phone back to Mom?” 
“Okay, bye Daddy! Mommy! Mommy, Daddy wants to say goodbye!” 
“The gremlins said you wanted to say goodbye?” You laughed over the clatter of the phone being handed haphazardly back to you. 
“Yeah baby, I gotta go back to work, but I just wanted to say I love you and thanks for helping them with lunch, it was really fucking cute. I’ll see you later, okay?” 
“The cutest 3 stinkers that I’ve ever met. I love you too, Jav. Bye, babe.” 
“Love you, bye.” 
As the dial tone went silent, Javi hung up the phone, taking in a deep exhale, still holding his hand out at his co-worker to preemptively prevent whatever what stupid remark was about to come out of his mouth. 
“I wasn’t gonna say anything!” Carter winced, holding up his hands in defense at Javi’s death glare, trying his best to hide the sly smirk spreading between his lips. “…. I just never really struck you for a rainbow glitter type of guy.” 
“Fuck off, Carter. Give me 10 more minutes to try and eat my lunch in fucking peace.” Javi groaned, trying to shoo him back out the door he had barged in from.
“Okay, okay, message received! I will say…I do think the glitter really does capture your bright and sparkly personality though, the unicorn stickers are really a nice-” 
“Carter…” 
“Sorry, sorry, I’m leaving! “ 
As the door clicked shut, Javi let his annoyance slip back to content, letting the colorful sparkle of his lunch back serve as his beacon of hope for the rest of the work day, thankful for the extra piece of home he got to keep with him until he got to see his girls again. 
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“Hey, I’m home!” Javi’s familiar voice rang through the hallway, barely 3 steps through the front door before the girls were rushing through the house, barrelling towards their dad to attack him with the biggest bear hugs their little bodies could muster. 
“Daddy!” They screeched, wrapping around every free inch of Javi’s body that they could reach, giggling as he crouched down to greet them, peppering them with ticklish kisses all over their faces. 
“Hola, Pollitas! Oh, I missed you guys! Did you guys have a good day today?” Javi grinned, now letting the bags he was holding in his hands drop to the floor, collecting his daughters in his grasp, wrapping them up in the tightest hug he could manage through their excited squirms and wiggles. 
“Yeah, we went to the park with Mommy and then we came home and played soccer and then ran through the sprinkler!” Lucy beamed, her sisters nodding in happy agreement, excited to tell their dad about today’s shenanigans while he was at work. 
“I scored two goals on Mommy!” Elliot added, her face lighting up with pride at her accomplishment. 
“No way! Nice stuff, Ellie Bellie!” Javi grinned, holding his hand out for a ferocious high-five from Elliot, pretending to shake his hand in pain at her strength, making the girls snicker at their dad’s overdramatics. “Hey, can you tell me where Momma is, I gotta go say hi to her too and then you can tell me all about the rest of your day, okay?” 
“She’s in the kitchen making dinner!” Lucy replied, giggling as Javi pressed a long kiss into the top of her head, nestled between her messy hair. 
“Mommy’s makin’ ‘pisgetti!” Harper cooed, Lucy and Elliot trying their best to keep from laughing at their youngest sister’s inability to pronounce spaghetti. 
“Thanks, lindas (cuties). Why don’t you guys go clean up your stuff and then we can help Mom with the rest of dinner?” 
“Okay!” The three agreed, dashing back through the house and disappearing down the hallways, Javi laughing to himself as he kicked off his shoes and picked up his bags, heading into the kitchen to find you at the stove, happily humming and swaying your hips to the radio playing in the background as you cooked, so wrapped up in what you were doing that you hadn’t realized your husband’s presence. 
Quietly setting down his bags on the counter, Javi rested his hip against the stone ledge, arms crossed over his chest as he watched you work, wondering to himself if he would ever get over how even the simplest things like watching you make dinner made him fall more and more in love with you, the familiar warmth of home and you creeping through his cheeks in a soft smile. 
“Hi, Momma.” He smirked, making you squeal in surprise as he snuck behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pressing a soft kiss into your shoulder, rocking you back and forth in his grasp. “I missed you guys today.” 
“Hi, handsome. We missed you, too. The girls haven’t stopped asking when you were going to be home since you called at lunch time. They were so excited you liked your lunch. Sorry if it was a little obnoxious. I tried to tell ‘em to go easy on the glitter, so hopefully none ended up in your food.” You chuckled, shaking your head at the image of the finished lunch bag that had made its way to work with Javi this morning. You turned around to face Javi, his hands still resting on your hips as you draped your arms over his shoulders, pressing up on your tiptoes to let your lips meet his, his mouth lingering just a little longer than usual as you felt his smile growing amidst his kiss. “What was that for?” You blushed, butterflies swirling in your stomach as his lips gently pulled away from yours, his thumbs rubbing soft circles on your skin in the space where your t-shirt and shorts parted. 
“I love you so much. You and the girls, I just- I’m just so thankful for all of you.” Javi grinned, the soft brown of his eyes sparkling in the kitchen light, looking you up and down as if in awe of the fact that you were the woman he got to hold in his grasp at the end of each day for the rest of his life. 
“I love you too, you goof.” 
Before your lips could meet again, the happy giggles of your girls flooded through the kitchen, their little pitters and patters of their feet tumbling the hallway to greet the both of you again. Peeking over Javi’s shoulder, you cocked your head in confusion at the plastic bag your girls were now rummaging through on the counter, wondering what Javi had been shopping for on his way home. 
“What’s in the bag, Jav?” 
“Well…” He paused, making his way over to the kitchen counter with the girls, picking up the bag and tipping it over, shaking its contents out in front of them, “I figured, since the munchkins did such a good job with today’s lunch bag-” 
“STICKERS!” 
“GLITTER PENS?!”
“PUFFY PAINT!” 
The girls shrieked, picking up the various brightly colored craft items Javi had brought home with him, along with a pack of brown paper bags, making the reason for his pit stop abundantly clear, and making you smile even wider than you already were. 
“...I figured, I still have 4 days of lunches left, and you guys did such a good job with my lunch today, that you could decorate the rest of my lunch bags for the week.” 
“Really?!” The girls squealed, their faces lighting up in excitement. 
“Really, really.” Javi beamed, reaching his arms around the girls to pick them up, the 3 laughing and squirming in pure joy, your heart bursting at the seams watching just how much Javi loved his little girls and the silliest, smallest things he would do just to make them smile. 
“Mommy, can we start right now!? Please, please, pleaseeeeee?” Lucy begged, Elliot and Harper joining in with their silent plea of sweet puppy eyes. 
“Let’s help Mommy with dinner and then we can-” 
“It’s okay, I think spaghetti can wait a little longer.” 
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wardenparker · 7 months
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Hummingbird Has Landed, ch 2
Marcus Pike x female reader Co-written with @absurdthirst
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After the debacle of his failed engagement and relocating to Washington to take charge of his task force, newly minted Special Agent Marcus Pike is ready to get back out into the dating pool once more. A slew of bad dates has him feeling a little down, and he takes an old friend up on an invitation to get away and get his head on straight. Imagine his surprise when he finds not only fresh air, but his soulmate as well - hiding in plain sight but in the unlikeliest of places.
Rating: Mature, but this blog is always 18+ Word Count: 12.6k Warnings: *Blanket warnings for this series: occasional mention of American politics, pregnant character, food/alcohol consumption, mentions of clothing/regulated dressing for occasions, mentions of therapy because we believe in self care here, reader is in a previous relationship, love triangle* Mentions of sick loved ones, mutual pining, personal guilt, relationship turmoil. Summary: After only knowing Marcus for a brief time, you can already feel emotions beginning to build. Will that spell trouble for the relationship you've worked so hard to build with Sam, or will something else altogether begun to sow seeds of doubt? Notes: Once again I'm afraid I have to ask forgiveness in the edit of this chapter. I went away for a few days this week and ever since my chronic illness has been utterly kicking my ass. Hopefully I didn't miss too many errors here.
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Game night will probably go down in the year's history as one of the best and most fun times that Marcus has had in a long time. He had laughed until his stomach hurt, his abs aching the next week for at least three days. He's gotten an open invitation back, but he doesn't know if that was a good thing, if he's honest with himself. His attraction to you is something that he's got to get ahold of if he's going to socialize with you more. It seems like everything about you just makes the heavens sing and the sun shine. It's crazy and he hates that, considering you are very happy in a relationship.
Eastern Market is his usual haunt on the weekend, preferring it to a generic grocery store, and he’s lost in thought enough that he doesn’t notice a familiar face at the florist’s stand across the way as he’s walking through the stalls. "Some peaches will be good." Marcus decides, looking through some of the fruits that have been trucked in from warmer states. "Peach smoothies." He decides, walking towards the gorgeous plump peaches on display.
If you were any other person in the world, it would be you who bumped into him and not the Secret Service agent contractually obligated to come along on your errands. As it is, when Agent Bailey defends you from being bumped into by the familiar figure of Marcus Pike, you’re the one who apologizes. “Oh! I’m so sorry, excuse u—Marcus?”
“Oh, hi!” Marcus shakes his head, reaching out and taking your arm. “I am so sorry. I guess I wasn’t paying attention.” He apologizes. “Was focused on getting some peaches and didn’t notice anything or anyone, obviously.” He flushes slightly, feeling that pull towards you and hating that he looks like a jerk, or maybe just thoughtless, in front of you. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
"Not at all." The flowers in your hands and the canvas shopping bags on your arm aren't harmed either, and you find yourself smiling much more brightly than you were even a second ago. "No harm done to me or to Agent Bailey, not to worry. Is it errand day for you, too?"
“Trying to eat healthier.” Marcus admits, slightly upset by the prospect but he figures that just comes with getting older. “Figured the produce here would be better than in a grocery store. Are these for the inn?” He asks, looking at the flowers in your hands and immediately reaches for them. “Let me help.”
"I thought my apartment could use some brightening up." He's seen the organized chaos that you live in and you're not embarrassed by it by any means, but there is a small sting to buying your own flowers just a few days before Valentine's Day. Sam isn't a flowers guy and that's perfectly fine, but you're definitely a flowers girl. When Marcus scoops them up without a second thought and stays by your side, you can feel your cheeks heat up. "I, um—thank you.
“Of course.” He huffs, as if newly made acquaintances should always scoop up flowers from you. “You chose brilliantly. They are gorgeous. Have you already paid for them?”
"Yes, so don't even try." It's just a playful warning that comes with a waggle of your finger, but you really have a feeling that he would try to pay for them if you hadn't.
He grumbles at that slightly. “Well, okay.” It’s almost pathetic that he takes note of what kind of flowers you like and he smirks. “So which flower is your favorite in this?” He asks.
"These," you point out a geometrically fascinating flower with petals that seem to spiral endlessly. "They're called camellias. We called them Winter Roses when I was growing up, but I've always loved them." The intimacy of the question goes straight over your head, just excited to have something pretty to split amongst the small vases in your little space.
“Camellias.” Marcus repeats the flower, filing away the information even though he shouldn’t use it. “They are beautiful.”
"Not everyone has them, so I tend to get my flowers here just to make sure they're in the mix." Barely aware that you're standing in the middle of a bustling market with people trying to move all around you, you have to shake away the warmth settling in you that is definitely not due to any kind of attraction. Nope. Not even a little. Not at all. "You, um..." you gesture to the next stall, where he was originally headed when the collision happened. "Peaches?"
“Peaches? Oh right, peaches.” Marcus laughs at himself and shakes his head. “Yeah, sorry, I’m – I forgot.” He snorts. “I was thinking about fresh peach smoothies.”
"Ooooo, that sounds incredible." All of a sudden it's the best idea you've heard all day, and you grin mischievously. "It's not exactly standard, but the next time you're craving a sweet after having Indian take out? Make a peach smoothie. It's got that same vibe as a mango lassi but it's slightly sweeter, and it's the most refreshing thing ever."
“I was actually thinking about having Indian tonight.” Marcus admits with a grin. “To reward myself for eating healthier.”
"Best reward in the world." You agree easily. "I told myself I was going to cook tonight and make sure there were leftovers for another day this week, but I am teetering dangerously close to just calling for take-out as well."
"Well..." Marcus almost doesn't offer, because of the fact that you have a boyfriend, but he is truly meaning this as a friendly offer. "If we went to have Indian together, it wouldn't be as bad as ordering it as take out, would it?" He ventures, raising his brows in offer.
You should say no, You should absolutely say no. Not because the invitation is improper in any way — after all, he's a friend. But because of the way your heart bumps and skips at the offer like you hope he means it as more. He doesn't, and that is a good thing. In fact, Marcus and Sam got along fairly well at game night. But you can't help the way your cheeks burn pleasantly. "DuPont Circle?" You ask, confirming that he means he was intending to order from the same place you were. When he nods, you do too. "That sounds really nice."
"This way..." He's immensely happy you are agreeing to come to eat with him. "We can order the samosas and pakoras and not feel any guilt what so ever." He tells you, grinning at you.
"No guilt, but definitely extra time at the gym." His smile is dangerous, but apparently your self-preservation instincts aren't nearly as good as you think they are, because the only alarm bell going off in your head is the one that says Don't Let It Become a Date! which you just brush off. Surely that won't even be a possibility. It can't, because you and Sam have a good thing going. "Although, you're not masochistic enough to have my little brother as your biweekly gym buddy, so your trips are probably far less traumatic than mine," you offer with a laugh.
"Nope." Marcus chuckles. "I just torture myself by running around the Mall during my lunchbreaks instead of spending it in museums or at the food trucks." He snorts. "I just get to smell them just off the Mall."
"Have you lived in DC for three years without doing any of the food trucks out on the Mall?" That might be the most appalling thing you've ever heard in your life, and you nearly drop the peach that you had just picked up to add to your basket.
"Oh no." He laughs at that. "First six months I was here, I fucking lived off food trucks." He admits. "I was undercover and my contact checked in with me through the food trucks."
"Oh, thank God." The both of you laugh as you wipe imaginary sweat of your forehead as though it had made you nervous. "If you had never had Julia's Empanadas, I might have had to drag you down to the Mall right now."
"Then I wouldn't have room for Indian." Marcus groans, rolling his eyes at the thought of how many empanadas he would try to fit in his stomach if you went to Julia's Empanadas. "And I'm really craving Indian."
"I am too." Although, now you're going to be thinking about empanadas for ages. Maybe you'll have to try making some. "How has your week been?" Making small talk is easy with him, as you poke through the fruit bins to find peaches, apples, and pears to snack on this week.
"It's been alright." He shrugs slightly. "Depositions for a few upcoming cases. So I've had to revisit case files and work with the district attorney's office to make sure that there aren't any surprises."
"Paperwork and meetings," you nod in understanding. "I get that. Being my own boss is a hell of a lot more paperwork and meetings than I ever thought it would be."
"Ordering supplies, creating events to drum up interest. Balancing budgets." He nods. "I can imagine that it feels like it's hard to get a free moment for yourself."
The way you nod is tired but proud. Every ounce of hard work that you put into that inn is worthwhile, and you do it with straight shoulders and as much determination as you can possibly summon. "Today is my first day off in...two or three weeks? It's...a lot. But it's so worthwhile. And it means that Syd has her place, too. I wouldn't trade it for anything."
"So how did you come to have the inn?" Marcus has been curious about that. "Was it always your dream? Or something you fell into?'
"I really, really liked throwing parties when I was younger." That's the easy way to start, as you both move to the line to pay for your bundles of fruit at this particular stall. "That grew up into loving to have guests over all the time. And then dreaming about running a hotel. So I took my sociology and history double major and got a job a hotel in Philly after college, putting myself through a hospitality degree while I started learning the ropes. It was a lot of years of working my way up, but eventually I got hired as the manager for the Inn at Jones Point under the old owners. They were struggling to keep up with new technology and losing clients because of it, and then..." Your eyes flick up to Marcus, almost apologizing for telling him the whole story. "We found out the reason Anita was having so much trouble learning the new technology was early-onset dementia alongside a sizeable brain tumor. I bought the inn from them when they made the decision that a comfortable end to her life was the most important thing they could do. Michael – Anita's husband – he comes around once a week for dinner and to check up on the place now that she's gone. He likes to keep an eye on it for her."
“That’s….” Marcus softens so much at the background story. “Beautiful. You are maintaining their legacy while adapting it to the new realities of time. Weathering time.”
"That farmhouse has been standing since the 1700s. We're just part of its legacy, not the other way around." The pair of you step up to be next in line, with Agent Bailey standing mere feet away managing to look imposing and nonchalant all at once. "The best part is that it could give Sydney her restaurant, and Juan a way to find himself in all the event planning. We didn't know what a team we'd be until we got going and now it's...it's just amazing."
“That’s incredible, and the fact that the place runs so smoothly is a testament to your hard work.” Marcus praises. He’s read some of the reviews and they are all positive, even the ones that had events beyond your control.
“That’s very kind of you.” Kind is an operative word for Marcus. As are sweet, funny, intelli— Nope, stop it, you’re getting dreamy again. Even the momentary distraction of having to pay for fruit is a welcome one if it gets your mind off that track.
Ouch. Kind is such a word that lands him in the friend zone. Which is where he has to be with you, but it still hurts. No longer edgy or cool like he was when he was in his old band. “What else do you need to get?” He asks, swinging his head around at the options available.
“I’m almost done actually.” It didn’t escape you that he flinched slightly when you were trying to be grateful and at least a little complimentary, and suddenly your stomach flips in fear that he might not like spending time with you are much as it seems. Or that you’d done something wrong. “I just wanted to get some fresh bread. But…I don’t know how much more you have to do.”
“Nothing.” He promises, shooting you a grin. “The least I can do is carrying things. Since you are saving me from a night of trying to cook.”
“Never learned to cook or just never got good at it?” There is a difference, after all, and it isn’t about want. Some people find cooking to be an incredible challenge. He gives you a look when you take your parcel of fruit from the vendor and accepts it on your behalf with thanks. Like a damn gentleman, you think with a pant in your chest.
“Never really had the time or the inclination.” He admits. “It’s hard to be enthusiastic about cooking for one, you know what I mean?”
“But that’s when you get to experiment!” Maybe it’s years of being friends with Sydney, whose world revolves around her tastebuds, but cooking has always been an outlet for you. It’s one of the only things you dislike about your apartment —the teeny tiny kitchen. “You can test out new things and weird combinations, and if it’s not great then the only person who knows is you. But if it’s awesome?” You grin up at him like you’re unveiling some kind of ultimate secret. “You become a rockstar at the next office potluck.”
Marcus chuckles. “I’m a rockstar anyway.” He jokes. “I’m the one who brings in the pizza and Chinese for the late nights in the office.”
“Okay, actually, that does count for a lot.” Walking in the direction of the bakery where you get all of your sweet treats and fresh bread, you readjust your shopping bag on your arm and try to glance around the place to survey your surroundings the way Agent Bailey has been teaching you. A comprehensive knowledge of your surroundings, she calls it. “I can’t really cook for my staff much when they have Sydney’s kitchen nearby, but I leave baked goods in the break room from time to time as a thank you. They work so hard.”
“There’s nothing better than snagging a muffin or a cookie when you’re rushing around.” Marcus agrees wisely.
“Or a slice of pizza.” It sounds like he works hard to keep his team in good spirits the same way you do, and you have to commend that in someone who works in such a dour field. Even art crimes — being less violent in nature, according to what you looked up the other night out of sheer curiosity — can’t possible be all sunshine and roses.
“Exactly.” He nods. “Sometimes we have all night surveillance or going through the evidence when something is time sensitive. My teams work better when they are well fed, and know how much they are appreciated.” He shrugs slightly, “everyone could benefit from know that every now and again.”
"Sometimes the weddings we run are just...they're insane. Or last year we had an entire family reunion take over the grounds for four very long days. I can't imagine it's half as stressful as what you deal with but the days can be really long and busy in their own right." For what it's worth, at least, you do love your job. And it's obvious that Marcus feels just as passionately about what he does.
“Oof.” He winces. “I bet the staff wanted to break out a bottle of bubbly when they were checked out.” Marcus jokes, chuckling slightly. “Yeah a lot of people don’t understand that when you love your job, the long hours are worth it.”
"Yeah." A tinge of regret breaks your smile, barely twitching in the corner of your mouth, and you barely nod. He can't possibly know what kind of a nerve he's hit — hell, you barely know yourself and you're the one feeling it. It just...it stings.
“Did I say something wrong?” He asks, immediately concerned when your smile seems almost sad.
"No." You reassure him much too quickly, and flinch in your own right when he looks skeptical. "It's just...not everyone thinks what I do is as worthwhile as, say, something like what you do. A—and that makes sense. Running an inn and upholding the law are—they're not the same. I'm not saying they are. It's just...that important to me. That's all."
“Whoever believes that is wrong.” Marcus insists wholeheartedly. “Running an inn is absolutely crucial. Maybe not to everyone, but to the people who need a little escape, a retreat to relax and revive themselves, your inn is a haven to them.” He is speaking passionately because he believes it. “When I’m out of town on a case, I hope that I can book a little inn. Something more personable than a Holiday Inn, so when I come back, it’s like a little slice of home.”
“I appreciate that. Really. It’s—I guess it’s a sore spot at the moment and I didn’t realize it. That’s all.” And you are absolutely not going to allow yourself to indulge in the image of Marcus coming back to the inn for you. Your place is not his ‘ little slice of home’. Even if you’re wondering what the would feel like if it was real.
“Well, you can always gripe and complain if you need to.” He promises.
“No, that’s—that’s not it.” It’s a little embarrassing, if you’re honest, but that’s only because you’re fighting being attracted to the man beside you. Otherwise you would just be chatting to a friend. “I just…don’t get to spend as much time with Sam as he would like. That’s all. Because we both have busy jobs.”
Marcus winces. “With the job he has, it would be hard unless you didn’t work.” He murmurs quietly. “But what counts is that you make the time you do have together special.”
“That’s what I said. Making the most of our time it’s what is most important.” The topic had come up again in conversation when you and Sam had talked about next steps — through the odd avenue of discussing your commute. His house to the inn isn’t a prohibitive drive, but it will warrant either having a lot of work done on your car or getting an upgrade. Right now you have no commute whatsoever, so you’re barely using your car outside of town.
“My favorite thing to do with my ex-wife was to curl up and watch a movie.” He admits. “Or work on a crossword together.”
“Those…” You laugh quietly, almost self-consciously, and shrug with the air of someone who is just about to give up. “Are the things I do with my good friend Agent Bailey, here. Though she kicks my ass at the Times Sunday crossword every single week.”
He rolls his eyes at himself. “I know it’s an old person’s activity, but I was normally exhausted from the academy.”
“Don’t you dare besmirch the Times Crossword.” A waggles finger and disapproving tsk seems to amuse him and it makes you smile, too. “That’s a mandatory topic of conversation at my mother’s dinner table.”
“Your mother enjoys the Times Crossword?” He asks, grinning at you. “She would get along with my parents. They have two subscriptions just so they can each do their own.”
“I’m keeping that in mind for Dad’s birthday this year.” It’s a brilliant idea. They would love to make a competition of it. It would be the highlight of their week.
“My parents got it as a wedding present and they enjoyed it so much, they kept it.” He tells you, smiling fondly at the memory of the two of them arguing playfully over their crosswords.
“That’s incredibly sweet.” There is a crowd at the bakery, as to be expected, so you and Marcus step into line to wait your turn. “I love the idea of being able to share small things with your partner. They’re every bit as important as the grand gestures, if not more.”
“Sometimes the smaller gestures are the most meaningful.” He admits with a grin. “I love cherry Danishes, and so did my ex. We would find these combo boxes of assorted and she would get the cherry one.”
“Giving up your favorite Danish flavor is not small.” An attempt at lightening the already light and sweet conversation is maybe…just trying to keep your own mind off of things. But that somehow doesn’t keep you from admitting the truth before you can stop yourself. “I have yet to meet the man I would give up my lemon poppyseed muffin for.”
“That’s only because you’ve never traded for a raspberry crumble muffin.” Marcus vows, smirking at the way you look stingy, even though he knows for a fact you aren’t.
“You’re on, Pike.” The smirk on his lips spreads to yours as effortlessly as breathing. “But lemon poppyseed is pretty impossible to unseat.”
“I don’t think you’ve ever had a raspberry crumble then.” He huffs, looking offended at the idea. “But I don’t think this place has them. I get them from a little bakery near the Bureau. I’ll have to bring you one.”
“I’ll get you a lemon poppyseed from the coffeeshop I go to in Old Town.” Even as its coming out of your mouth you know it sounds like flirting, but the fact is that you just feel so naturally comfortable with him. There is nothing flirtatious about muffins, you tell yourself. Nothing at all. “We can compare notes.”
“That sounds like a plan to me.” Marcus is extremely happy that you would like to make plans with him, any plans. Even if it’s just a friendly wager. “I’ll get the raspberry crumble. I say we each get two. And if you like the other one so much, you have to give up both.”
“Deal.” You put your hand out to him, willing to make a friendly bet on almost anything. That’s gotten you and your brother in trouble before, but this is harmless.
Marcus grins as he takes your hand, imagining that lightning bolts are shooting up his hand. Winking, he laughs, “just don’t be disappointed when you break that little rule of yours for me.” He boasts.
“We’ll see.” The tone of the thing really tries for teasing, but you end up so taken aback by the electricity in shaking his hand that you fluster — which is only compounded when you end up next in line and completely forget the word for ‘sourdough’ in the process.
“I, uh, I want-“ you seem completely out of it, and the bored looking boy behind the counter seems to be getting annoyed with you. “Can we have just a second?” Marcus asks, pulling you back and allowing another couple to go ahead of the two of you. “I’ve completely forgotten what I wanted.” He takes the blame, not wanting to embarrass you.
“Bread?” You manage to supply, feeling like a world class idiot for clamming up on something so routine. If being around him is going to be this big of a problem, you need to get yourself in order.
“Yeah, bread.” He nods, wrinkling his nose slightly. “What’s that type that I like?”
At this point he could mean him or he could mean you, or he could even just be speaking in theoreticals, but you have you head in straight enough again to blow out a breath and remember yourself. “Sourdough. I forgot the damn word for sourdough.”
“Thats it.” He snaps his fingers and looks back at the boy. “Could we get some sourdough bread?”
“Sure.” The kid looks at the both of you like you’ve gone insane but turns around to bag a loaf of freshly baked bread without a second thought for his strange customers.
Marcus pays for the bread, even with you huffing beside him and guides you towards the clearing. “That wasn’t that bad.”
“Only because you saved me from sputtering like an idiot.” It’s beside the point that he is also the reason you were sputtering in the first place. That doesn’t matter. It’s the fact that you couldn’t keep it together that bothers you. “Thanks for that.”
“Not at all.” He waves off your thanks. “Everyone has those moments.” He promises, smiling at you.
There is such a moment of relief when you exhale again that you have to make light of it or else you’re in danger of feeling far more grateful than is probably necessary, and that makes your chest ache in a dull and insistent kind of way. “That’s either very sweet of you or a complete placation, but either way I appreciate it.”
“No placation, I promise.” He crosses his finger over his heart and smiles at you. “Anywhere else?”
“That was the last thing for me.” Even though you have plans to have dinner with him that night you still can’t help feeling a little disappointed that the impromptu shopping trip has come to an end. “Unless you needed something else?”
“Well…” Marcus looks around, not wanting to let you leave just yet. “Maybe I could find a plant to kill?” He asks. “Something to brighten up my place?”
"Bit of a black thumb?" The excuse to not say goodbye yet is welcome, and you end up smiling more broadly than you mean to. "Let's see what we can do about that."
“More that I forget to set up someone to water my plants when I go out of town and they die miserable, thirsty deaths while I’m away.” He flashes you a guilty grin. “I’m a murderer.”
“Very rude of you to do to your plants.” The wholesome, straight-faced nod that you cry for cracks on a giggle, though, and you nod in the direction of an entirely different florist stand than the one you were at before. “What you need is a succulent.”
“That sounds a little dirty.” Marcus admits, not even realizes how flirtatious that sounds.
It does. And you didn’t mean for it to. You were just talking about the type of plant he could get. But then there’s that grin on his face and it’s so fucking puckish and * handsome* that you practically groan about how unfair the whole damn thing is. “Whoops?” You offer, obviously not apologetic in the least.
He snorts and winks at you again. “I don’t mind. Sometimes being a little dirty is a good thing.” It’s borderline inappropriate, so Marcus doesn’t say anything else.
“Sometimes it’s the fun of an otherwise boring day.” But since you’re genuinely afraid you might say too much if you go ahead with this line of thought, and since Agent Bailey is steadily avoiding your eyes like an older sister trying not to bear witness to your trouble making, you clear your throat and change the subject. “I think I snake plant would work for you. They’re really easy to care for and great for beginners or busy people.”
Marcus takes your lead and nods seriously. “I’ll take some advice. Any advice.” He shrugs slightly. “I wish I had the time for pets, but I don’t and it’s wrong to do that to them.”
“If I could have a dog, I would have a little corgi or a Yorkie in a heartbeat.” It comes with an almost wistful sigh, but you feel the same way he does. It would be cruel to the animal you’re supposed to be taking care of. “But since I have no concept of work-life balance? I have plants.”
“I’ll start with plants.” Marcus huffs. “If I can keep one alive? Maybe I’ll move on to cats? They are low maintenance.”
“Cats are fantastic. Sydney and Anna Leigh always had a couple when we were growing up and they can’t be the sweetest animals in the world.” There is a florist that specializes in succulents and potted plants further into the market and you head that way, chatting as you go. “I just always said I would want my kids to grow up with a puppy.”
“Puppy, a swing set in the yard and dinner together.” Marcus adds wistfully, having his own version of that same dream. “Every kid needs a puppy pal.”
“That’s exactly what I said.” And the knot in your stomach tells you that that isn’t a coincidence — that the future you’ve dreamt about probably lines up with the one he wants in so many different ways.
“We had my dog for nearly twenty years.” Marcus tells you. “He was my best friend and the best soul I’ve ever met.”
“I got Alex instead of a dog,” you giggle, silliness tinging the edge of his sweet nostalgia. “My little brother.”
“Isn’t a younger brother the same thing?” He asks with a grin.
“Very much so. And Alex is as much Golden Retriever as he is human.” If he were here, he’d give you so much grief for that comparison, but you stand by it. “What kind of dog did you have?”
Marcus chuckles. “A golden retriever.” He tells you without skipping a beat. “I’ve got a picture of him, wanna see?”
“Absolutely!” They say you’re either a kid person or a dog person, but you’re definitely both. Anything cute and squishy is right up your alley.
Digging out his wallet, it might be a little old fashioned to carry a physical photo of the favorite family pet, but he likes looking at it sometimes. He’s holding his dog, Hansel, in the picture. The white around the dog’s snout indicative of the older age of the golden retriever. “Here he is. Hansel.”
“What an angel!” If you could jump right through the photo and squeeze his beautiful face you would — the only problem is that you don’t know if you mean young Marcus or the dog.
“Wasn’t he?” Marcus hums happily. “He slept in my room growing up. Hated me leaving for college, although I hated being apart from him too.”
"How could you possibly leave that face? Look at him!" Yeah, it's definitely the dog that you're talking about. At least right now.
“Yeah.” He smiles down at the photo, unable to resist brushing his thumb over the canine face with happy memories flooding through him. “He was the best.”
"So would you want another Golden Retriever?" Looking between him and the photo, you think you might be able to guess the answer yourself. "Or will no other Golden ever live up to him?"
“Probably not.” Marcus shrugs. “He was from a litter of puppies at the shelter. It was just a coincidence that he was a pure Golden.” He frowns slightly. “I would want to adopt. It’s the best way to give a loving home to an animal.”
"Adopting is the only way." On that, you can firmly agree. But you point to the florist stand up ahead and touch his arm gently in an unconscious moment of casual comfort. "First, let's get you a plant to adopt."
“Yes, I would prefer adopted over nursery grown.” Marcus jokes, trying to ignore how easy it is to be with you. You can just be a friend. It’s possible and it’s possible he’s lying to himself.
"Wild, orphaned plants wandering the lonely roads with all their belongings tied up in a little bandana on a stick," you tease, conjuring the image of a cartoon orphan as best you can. To the girl behind the counter, you turn your full attention and the best conspiratorial smile you can conjure. "We're looking for something he'll have trouble killing," you confide with a chuckle. "Something like a snake plant, maybe? Or if you have a better recommendation we're all ears."
“It’s best to start them out with a plant before having pets or kids, isn’t it?” She asks with a grin, eyeing Marcus in amusement. “But he seems like the trustworthy type to me.”
"A fine, upstanding citizen if ever I saw one." The smirk you offer her is playful, and you glance up at Marcus beside you. "Plus, I'll be keeping an eye on the situation. For the good of the adoptee, of course."
“Of course.” She nods seriously, even though there is a definitely shaking to her voice, like she’s holding back laughter. “Let me show you the best options for a recovering black thumb.”
It's several minutes of back and forth with the florist who parries your playful banter well, and you end up leaving her stand with not just a lovely potted snake plant for Marcus, but an identical one for your apartment as well. "I had to!" You coo, when Marcus laughs at the little plant that you're cradling like a newborn. "It's so precious! And they're twins! I couldn't just leave it abandoned."
“Well, we have to name them.” Marcus decides. “Twin names.” He grins at you, “what do you think?”
"Luke and Leia," you joke right away, because that will always be the first pair of twins you think of in any situation. "Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum? Oh, do the creepy girls from The Shining have names?"
Considering The Shining was his first foray into horror when he was younger, it was also one of his favorites. "No, they were just called Grady Daughters one and two." He tells you. "But..." He whips out his phone. "They are Lisa and Louise Burns, in real life."
“So are the plants Grady and Burns, or Lisa and Louise?” Either way they’re exceedingly silly choices, and you’re going for it.
“Either one works for me.” Marcus laughs. “It depends on if the plants are male or female.” He jokes.
“I think we probably get to pick,” you joke right back, making a show of rolling your eyes at him even though you’re laughing.
“Hmmmmm.” He pretends to take a closer look at his plant. “I’m going to surprise you.” He decides. “My plant is female.”
“Oh, that’s no surprise to me.” The smirk you shoot back at him is probably the lightest and most carefree you r felt in ages, and just for the moment you’re not going to second guess it. You’re just going to revel in the moment. “All my plants are female.”
He snickers with you and then tilts his head. “Lisa or Louise for you?” He asks, before he answers. “I bet you want the name Louise. You’ll pretend it’s for Thelma and Louise.”
“I—how—” Staring at him in utter confusion does not help matters one bit, but you still don’t have any clue as to how he could possibly have guessed that about you after only having met you two whole times. “So?” You ask after a second, realizing you’re laughing with the absurdity.
You have the most beautiful laughs Marcus has ever heard, and he loves that he caused it. There’s a flash of guilt that comes with the thought and he decides to reel it back into the scope of reality. You are becoming a friend, nothing more. “Who wouldn’t?” He asks, still chuckling. “They were the greatest female duo in modern cinema. In my opinion.”
“They line up against Idgie and Ruth from Fried Green Tomatoes.” You’ll stand by that pairing until the day you die, but the way warmth is spreading through your chest and your fingers ache dully from wanting to reach out for him is a special, damning sort of agony. “And I will die on that hill.”
“I had completely forgotten about Idgie and Ruth.” He admits, hanging his head in shame. “Forgive me.”
“Just this once.” There is still a teasing grin on your face when your phone goes off in your pocket. Sam’s name splashed across your caller ID and guilt crawls through your veins immediately. “I’m sorry,” you apologize, glancing up at Marcus. “Just give me one second.”
Marcus catches a glimpse of the name and it’s like he’s doused with cold water. “Of course.” He murmurs politely, turning towards a little book stand to give you some privacy, beating himself up for flirting with another man’s significant other.
“Hey honey.” The second you pick up the phone with a plant in your other arm and your groceries weighing on your shoulder, that is the second you feel most self-conscious.
“Hey,” Sam’s voice comes over the line and he has a straightforward attitude, jumping into the reason for his call. “I’ve had a dinner invite tonight, some potential donors.” He tells you. “Can you make it?”
“I—” It’s not like it’s an unusual request. If he has a work event tonight then the best possible person he can have at his side is you. The idea of having dinner with Marcus had been so uplifting, and now cancelling on him makes you feel awful. But this is your boyfriend. “Yeah. Yeah, I can make it. Where and when? Is there a dress code?”
Sam rattles off the address and dress code. “Thanks honey, I knew I could count on you.” He tells you before he murmurs to someone else. “Hey, I’ve got to go, I love you.” The line clicks off immediately.
“I love you too.” It’s said to the silence, and you look down at your phone for a moment before pocketing it again. Marcus has stepped away to give you privacy, and you shift your weight from one foot to the other before walking back over to him. “I’m really sorry,” you murmur, actually looking as apologetic as you feel. “Can we postpone dinner tonight?”
“Oh….yeah, of course.” He hates the way the feels rejected, but you have priorities, ones that aren’t him. “That’s no problem at all.” He nods quickly and looks around. “Well, we should probably get your things to your car, right?”
“I—I’m really sorry.” Repeating it just makes you feel worse. But both of you feel worse, unbeknownst to you, and you walk in the direction of your car with Agent Bailey her usual two steps behind. “Something came up.”
“Not a problem at all.” Marcus promises you, plastering on a smile as you turn to him at your car. “I understand. Believe me, I’ve had plenty of things come up.”
"It was really nice to run into you today." There is no word of a lie or even exaggeration in that, and you take your flowers from Marcus's arms carefully, loading it into the backseat with your other bags and Louise the snake plant.
“Yeah, it was nice seeing you. Marcus holds up his plant. “Thanks for the help.” He hums. “Hopefully I won’t kill Thelma.”
"If you do, try to make it as spectacular as possible." Offering him a half smile, you realize that you just wish you could give him a big hug, but that would be totally out of line. So instead all you can think to do is shift your weight awkwardly again before opening your car door. "I'll see you around, Marcus."
“See ya.” He nods and turns around to walk to his car. He doesn’t turn around, knowing that it would look weird if he did.
Once you’re in the car with Agent Bailey and focused on getting back home to put everything away and make a cup of coffee before you have to start getting ready for the night, you sigh softly and sit back in your seat. You can feel the curiosity of the Secret Service agent beside you and you wonder if you look as guilty as you. “That was a nice surprise.”
“Yes.” Agent Bailey hums. “Special Agent Pike was quite a surprise.”
“He’s nice,” you defend, very aware that you’re defending yourself and not him.
“He’s very nice.” She agrees. “And exactly who he says he is.” Of course a background check had been done on the agent, which she was glad of now that he had popped back up on radar. Not quite sure what to make of the interaction at the market, it’s also not her place to judge it.
"Well, that's a comfort." The drive back to Alexandria won't take long, but you twist your hands around the steering wheel a few times before pulling out into traffic. "Unfortunately, tonight will be the opposite," you tell her with a dramatic sigh that cushions the blow of having to attend an impromptu event. "Sam asked me to come to a dinner party tonight. Last minute invitation, I guess somebody had a seat they needed filled and asked him."
“I see.” Now she has to find out where you are going to be, who is on the guest least and it means overtime tonight. She doesn’t sigh, but she wants to, much preferring to go to small Indian restaurant over some political function. “I’m sure it will be a lovely evening.”
"I know you have to vet everything." The process seems exhausting, but you would never question the agent's ability to get her job done. "It's a private party at Arthur Connesby's house. The aerospace tech guy? Apparently it's a party for his wife, but everybody invited are Sam's constituents. I have a feeling they're going to spend the night trying to pitch their own interests to him, but if nothing else they might donate to his next campaign if they feel like they got to be friendly with him." It sounds like it will be a fairly boring night of overly rich old men feeling self-important, but Sam asked you to be there and that's why you're going.
“Noted.” The agent is immediately firing off a text to her support team, letting them know about the change of plans tonight.
"I know it's not what we had in mind." The night has gone from staying home and watching a movie and maybe playing cards, to dinner out, to an entire party. It's a lot of jumps in not much time. "And I appreciate you being flexible. Truly."
“It’s my job to protect you no matter what.” She reminds you softly. She enjoys you, has gotten to know you and thinks you are lovely, but you are Hummingbird to her. The First Daughter of the President of the United States and her assignment. She would guard you regardless of what you were doing because it’s her job.
"Right." You nod slightly, eyes cast back out on the road, and try not to slump even a little as you drive. It's not necessary to be everyone's best friend. You know that on a practical level. Right now your energy is better served focusing on the night ahead. "Well, I can still be grateful. So thank you. For...being professional. An very good at your job."
She knows that you are disappointed, but one of the cardinal rules of the secret service is to not be emotionally attached to your assignment. It would be too difficult to make life or death decisions. “Protecting you has been my pleasure.” She promises.
"I appreciate that." For better or for worse, the Secret Service will be a part of your life for the rest of your life. So if you can't be friends, at least you can appreciate each other. For now, though, you ought to focus. A party with your boyfriend's constituents is no place to have your mind wander.
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The dinner party is exactly what you imagined it would be. Self important people, boasting about how important they are as they fawn over ‘more’ important people. Or the people who could give them access to the power they wished to have. Sam was in his element, smiling and shaking hands. Listening to ideas with a feigned interest that comes naturally to politicians.
He's charismatic enough to keep their attention but has enough of his own heart left that he does seem to care about issues being brought to him. Unfortunately for these folks, they're talking about a whole lot of things that just one man can't change on their behalf. So all he can really do is listen and express interest in whatever plight it is they have.
You have found yourself in the rather unfortunate position of being inundated by the significant others of these men, and when the party turns to mingling after dinner they somehow manage to whisk you away to the garden where you aren't sure if they're planning on trying to get you to dance with various people, or maybe join their country clubs, You really can't tell which.
“You must tell me, how is living in the White House?” One asks you, under the impression that you are still living with your mother.
“I understand it’s very comfortable.” It’s almost a relief that these women seem not to know a thing about you beside who your mother is. Your greatest fear about the whole thing was being hounded through every day of your life — so far that hasn’t been the case. But it’s been barely more than a month. There’s time. “However, I chose not to reside there.”
“Oh, what a shame.” She hums, wondering why you wouldn’t want to call the most famous house in America home. “I hear that it’s haunted.”
“That is what they say.” And according to your little sister, it’s absolutely true. But an upscale party of relatively stuffy guests like this doesn’t seem like the place to spout tales of your sister taking her homework to the Lincoln bedroom. “And it’s certainly very beautiful.”
“I would love to take a tour sometime.” She tells you, hoping that you might offer to set it up for her. An intimate tour would be amazing.
“I’m sure that can be arranged.” You aren’t the sort of person who would exchange favors, so the thought that this could mean a donation for Sam’s campaign in the near future. Instead, you just know it would be something nice. “I can have something put together for you if you like?”
“That would be lovely!” She exclaimed, sending you a warm smile. “You know, you and the congressman make a beautiful couple. Possibly even presidential one day.” It’s a fishing expedition, feeling you out for your thoughts on a possible run.
"Possibly." And two weeks ago, you might have beamed at that implication. At the idea of Sam moving through his career with such gusto and motivation that he makes it all the way to the White House. But seeing what your father contends with as First Gentleman, the idea of being First Lady sounds overwhelming to you. It's even less likely that you would end up in politics yourself. "Sam takes his work very seriously, and he has high hopes for the future of our country."
“And what about you?” She asks. “You made waves, positive ones in my opinion, during your mother’s campaign about your stance on soulmates.”
"I don't have any political ambitions for myself." Of that, you can absolutely assure her. "While I'm more than happy to support the people around me, I'm very happy with my own career."
“At least until Congressman Chase makes an honest woman out of you.” She hums. “Then it’s so hard to balance your own career while supporting the ambitions of your husband.” There’s a rueful chuckle on her part. “Believe me, I know.”
"I won't be giving up my career." This is always a topic of conversation amongst significant others, you've found, and a topic that your father has contended with on multiple occasions. As your mother's career grew, he became a stay-at-home-dad and raised three kids. Because it was something he wanted to do, not because it was forced on him. And that has always been the key to you. "I own a business. So it's essentially my first child already."
“Oh?” Her brows wing up in surprise. “My apologies. I must have misunderstood.” Her eyes slide past you. “Excuse me, I must go catch Mrs. Jackson before she leaves.” She cuts off the conversation and hustles away.
It's a bit on and definitely abrupt, but the conversation wasn't very enjoyable to begin with so you smile politely and just let it roll off your back. Whatever she 'misunderstood' doesn't really concern you. Some gossip article must have speculated on the next steps of your relationship with Sam and you try not to let that kind of nonsense get to you.
“Having fun?” Sam comes up to you, his hand slipping around your waist and he presses a kiss to your cheek. “You look amazing, especially since it was so last minute.”
"You always like this dress." The first time you wore it was the nominating party after the Democratic National Convention, and then again to a fundraiser in Chicago. That was the night you met Sam, and he had remarked even then that the dress was particularly beautiful. It seemed like the logical choice for tonight based on that alone. "It's a nice party." The food was predictable but tasty, and the drinks are flowing, just like the way you expected the night to go. "Do we think there will be birthday cake?" You ask conspiratorially, looking up at him beside you with a smirk. "Is that something people still do for fancy fiftieth birthdays?"
“Cake is universal.” Sam snorts and nods. “I have it on good authority the cake is a chocolate raspberry mascarpone cream cake.” He tells you, knowing it will be an idea you carry back to Sydney.
"I know exactly what Saturday's dessert special is going to be." Somehow your best friend will turn a classic cake into something elegant and thoughtful, and you know the entire restaurant will go nuts for it. They always do, when Sydney gets to show off. "Are you having a good night? I know you had high hopes for networking tonight."
“It’s going well.” He hums happily and beams at you. “How about you? Working the other side for me?” He teases playfully, aware you don’t usually like campaigning.
"Nothing that will get me in trouble with my Mom's staff." Not that he would ever ask you to do anything like that. Sam doesn't go in for most of the entitled bullshit that other politicians do. "One request for a White House tour that I'll put through the appropriate channels. Nothing too odd."
“Interesting.” Sam looks thoughtful. “Who asked for that?”
"Shelly D'Amario." The wife of District Attorney-turned-Superior Court Judge Raymond D'Amario was one of the few people you had recognized from press coverage of events supporting your mother's campaign. Her husband's politics were lined up with most moderate Democrats, and he tended to hand down verdicts with thoughtful conclusions at the end of each case. He's one of those people you wouldn't have minded at all sitting at this dinner party with, but unfortunately the Judge was not able to attend.
“Oh.” Sam nods. “I was at another dinner with her and the judge just the other night.” He tells you. “Picking his brain about Constitutional law.”
“She was very nice.” Though instinct takes over, and you chew on your bottom lip for a second before going on. “Did you guys talk…about me at all? About us, I mean? At your dinner?”
“Well, naturally you came up.” Sam admits with a slight frown, wondering if Shelly had somehow insulted you. “Not everyone is dating the daughter of the current sitting President. But I didn’t share any private details about you.” He promises. “Or your family.”
“I know you wouldn’t do that.” If he was the sort of person who went around sharing personal details with anyone and everyone, you wouldn’t have been able to trust him. Especially not under the condition you met in. Campaigns are cutthroat. “She just…said something that kind of confused me, that’s all.”
“What confused you?” He asks, trying to recall the exact details of the dinner with the judge and his wife.
Without wanting to imply that he might have said anything, you still glance around you to make sure that Agent Bailey is the only one close enough by to overhear you. “She seemed to be under the impression that I would be quitting my job if we ever have a family. And when I said that wasn’t the case, she said she must have ‘misunderstood’ something and walked away immediately.”
Understand dawns in his eyes and Sam shifts slightly. “Well, that’s not something we’ve talked about just yet.” He reminds you. “That’s a conversation we need to have.”
"Right." You couldn't agree more. "Which is why I was confused that she seemed to have heard an opinion about it somewhere before. But it was probably just some gossip article."
He hesitates and then decides to come clean, you don’t like liars. “I might have voice my hopes for our future.” He admits. “It’s not so unexpected, is it?” He asks. “I’ll be spending a lot of time at different events and I will want you by my side.”
"Sam..." There's disappointment in your voice that you don't bother to hide. Of course he's absolutely entitled to talk about hopes, as he puts it, but you can't believe that he would ever think you would give up the inn. "I own the place, honey. It's not like taking a smaller role in an office or shifting to part time somewhere."
“Yes, you own it.” Sam stresses. “But you can have someone else manage it.”
"But I don't want to have someone else manage it." It's really like you can't believe your ears. Sam has never voiced anything like this before within the dynamic of your relationship and he knows very well how proud you are of your work at the inn and how much it means to you.
By the set of your jaw and the frown on your face, Sam knows that he can’t argue the point right now. He shakes his head, smiling at you and taking your hand. “You’re right. I—I wasn’t thinking about how much you love your inn.” He admits softly. “Let’s just forget about it, hm?”
"O—okay." There he is again. Your understanding, supportive Sam smiling at you and taking the stress out of the situation. The man you started dating almost a year ago. Dependable. "Okay."
“Good.” He pats your hand gently and leans in to kiss you softly. “But I do still want to talk about moving in together.”
"After our date on Tuesday?" The Valentine's night you had settled on together is dinner at a small, family-owned restaurant in his hometown followed by a fundraiser screening of short films made by local high schoolers looking to update their school's resources with the proceeds. Community-oriented is the theme of the night.
“That sounds appropriate.” He agrees with a nod. “For now, let’s just enjoy the rest of the evening.” He looks towards your secret service agent. “Will you be allowed to come to my place tonight?”
"I think that can be arranged." The invitation means you'll be sleeping over at his place twice this week, which is definitely more than you've been able to do lately and maybe that's a good thing. Maybe you just need to refocus yourself. And stop thinking about Marcus, for fuck's sake. You slip your arm around Sam's waist and lean into his side. "I just have to let Bailey know. Her relief agent will have to be told to go to your place instead of mine."
"Of course." Even though it irritates him, he nods. Understanding that you cannot help it right now. After your mother's term, perhaps you will decline protection.
"I know it isn't perfect." He's bristled about lack of privacy before, and though you can't say that you really blame him? There's nothing you can do about it. Secret Service protect for the President's immediate family is mandatory. And hell, you have a Secret Service agent in your apartment every night. At least when you stay with Sam, your agent usually stays in the living room or their car like a stakeout. It's typically left up to them. But still, you do understand the objection. "I'm sorry. It is what it is."
"I know." He sighs softly, hating that the evening has been sidetracked from what he imagined. "I understand. I just don't like them be so close when we are alone." He admits.
"I know." The last five minutes have become increasingly uncomfortable, but you still stick close to Sam and continue smiling, aware that eyes at the party might be on you just like they are anytime you go anywhere outside of your little haven at the inn. "But better that, than someone breaking into your house."
He doesn't point out that he has a security system and his townhouse is in a gate community. There's no point and it would just further cause an discussion that is best left for the relative privacy of his bedroom - with a secret service agent parked outside in his living room. He sighs. "Shall we get more wine?" He asks, trying to change the subject.
"Sure." There are people starting to dance to the music being piped through outdoor speakers, but you're not really in a dancing mood. There's too much swirling around in your mind to be light on your feet. "Wine sounds like a good plan."
Sam leads you over to the bar, ever the gentleman and stands beside you to look at the drink selections. "They have a nice pinot grigio." He murmurs softly.
"Is that what you want too?" The bar is open, of course, but the catering company has allowed the bartender to put out a small and discreet tip jar for the reasonably large party tonight, and you have a few more bills in your purse that you're happy to add to the jar.
"I think I'm going to stick with the pinot noir." He tells you, holding up his almost empty glass.
You order both glasses without hesitation and tip the very pleasant bartender, handing Sam his glass after it's put on the bar top. Just something nice to get the night back on track. At least as far as the two of you go.
"So I think that we should drink our wine and then dance." Sam suggests. It would be a good visual and romantic as a bonus. He's not calculating, but he does understand that optics are important in politics. It's a good opportunity to romance you and look good for the discreet photographers that are roaming around.
"And at some point, eat cake." Trying to lighten the mood a little is really your go-to for diffusing tension in any situation, and the air around the two of you feels a little thick, so you offer him a big smile instead of getting serious again.
"Eating cake is always a good way to spend a night." Sam agrees, smiling back at you.
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"Morning." You haul yourself into the restaurant's kitchen the next morning when you arrive bright and early for your eight-a.m. start time looking vaguely less drowsy than usual. The other member of your Secret Service detail — Agent Sisson — has music taste more in line with yours and you'd listened to Duran Duran on your way back to town this morning. That and a cup of strong coffee means that you're feeling okay but definitely in need of breakfast.
“Wellllllll,” Sydney’s grin is bright as she eyes you. “I see the walk of shame has taken on a festive air.” She teases, laughing as she moves over to pour you a cup of coffee. “I take it last night went well?”
“I have enough time to go upstairs and change before work,” you grumble, though you’re smiling and accept the cup of coffee gratefully. “Usual boring party, but I bring you home a new cake flavor combination to try, and it was nice to see Sam.”
She snorts. “Nice to see Sam.” She mimics. “It’s like you ran into him in the store.” She huffs at you. “This is your boyfriend. The man you love.”
“And that’s why it’s nice to see him more than just one measly night a week.” Given that you have a few minutes, you hop up on a stool at the counter beside her work station and groan in appreciation at the slice of sweet Italian brioche and carefully cut piece of frittata she plates up for you without hesitation. “Oh my god, thank you. All I’ve had so far is coffee. We overslept and both had to run out to get to work on time.”
“Overslept…” she rolls her eyes and rubs her stomach. “I wish I could remember what that was like.” She grumbles. “This one is giving me heartburn all the time and keeping my sleep short.”
“They just really want to make sure you remember they’re there,” you tease, picking up a forkful of frittata and not even caring what’s inside. Everything Syd makes it incredible. “Twenty-seven whole more weeks of this, Mama. Get excited!”
“I am, I promise. But the kid can let me sleep in a little, right?” She huffs playfully. “So how was the dinner? You came back from the market in a hurry so I didn’t get to talk to you. Did you forget about this or was it last minute?”
“It was last minute. He got a spontaneous invitation to a potential supporter’s wife’s birthday party.” Oh my god, spinach and artichoke frittata, so fucking good. “She got the gift of bragging rights that a Congressman and the First Daughter came to her party, and a very nice bottle of champagne.”
“Sounds like a ton of fun.” Sydney likes hobnobbing even less than you do, preferring to be on the service side of fancy events. “So you ate mildly bland catered food and drank way too much wine?”
“Exactly. Which is why this tastes even more incredible than usual.” You point at your plate even while scooping up another bite. “So did you and Juanito ever decide what you’re doing tomorrow? I know you scheduled yourself for the dinner rush, but you’ve got to do something.”
“My husband is amazing.” She promises, beaming in delight. “He actually got us reservations at St. Regis for the Valentine’s Day Afternoon Tea.”
“Oh, that’s so sweet! It’s so utterly romantic I could barf.” The momentary flash of jealousy is nothing, and you’re genuinely happy that they’ll be able to get out and do something. They work so incredibly hard and never complain for a second. “It’s perfect, Syd. I want a full report.”
“I’m excited.” She admits, biting her lip and fiddling with her practical silicone wedding band that she wears in the kitchen. “I’ve also been promised a very relaxing massage and a few orgasms.”
“All things which you deserve very much.” You raise your coffee cup in salute to her and grin.
“At the very least.” She huffs, her own grin one of pure happiness. “I am growing Badillo’s baby.” She reminds you, as if it isn’t common knowledge at this point. She’s so proud of being with her soulmate and she cock her head at you curiously. “Have you given any more thought to that tattoo?” She pries gently.
“Yes and no…” It’s much more yes than no, if you’re honest with yourself, but the fact is that it’s probably not good to think about it as much as you have. It’s like a never-ending loop in your mind and you absolutely can’t shake it. “I just don’t know what good it would do to bring it up. Or who I would even bring it up to.”
“You know who you should bring it up to.” She huffs.
“Who?” You challenge, feeling like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place without doing so much as being awake this morning. “My boyfriend of almost a year who asked me to move in with him and wants to start planning our future? Or the guy I barely know who invited me to dinner yesterday when I ran into him at Eastern Market and looked so hurt when I had to ask him to reschedule that I still feel like I kicked the world’s cutest puppy?” Clearly it’s been on your mind, and Syd is really the one person you can talk to about any of it. But admitting that you’ve been thinking about Marcus feels like cheating and you have always despised cheaters deeply. Being cheated on will do that to a person.
“You ran into Marcus?” Her eyes widen with the new information and she immediately sets down her spoon and walks around the counter to hug you. “Oh honey, talk to me. What happened?” She asks softly. While she might be pushing you to at least ask if you might be soulmates, she doesn’t want you to be upset.
“It wasn’t a big deal…we ran into each other and we finished our shopping together.” It’s such a relief to have a space to talk about it, and yet you know you’re blowing it out of proportion in your head. It was just a coincidence that you ran into him. Not fate. “We were both talking about wanting Indian for dinner so he asked if I wanted to go to the restaurant with him. We were just going to hang out. Then Sam called.”
“And of course you said yes to Sam.” Sydney doesn’t exactly approve of the way Sam seems to think that you wait for his call and will drop everything to accommodate him, but she doesn’t say anything. “How did Marcus take the change of plans?”
“He said he understood and that it was fine.” Which is, technically, what happened. So when you shift your eyes away from hers, Sydney makes a noise and you cave. “He seemed disappointed,” you admit, throwing up your hands. “But I’m probably just projecting that.”
“Anyone would be disappointed to not spend time with you.” Sydney defends immediately, always the best cheerleader for you. “Maybe text him and reschedule?” She suggests. “Friends have dinner, it’s not cheating. You aren’t going out on a date.”
“I know it’s not cheating.” Syd knows better than anyone why you hate liars and cheaters. “I texted him on my way in this morning to reschedule, but I don’t…I don’t know if he’ll respond. He was probably just being polite asking in the first place.”
“I doubt that.” Sydney had seen the covert looks that each one of them had given the other when they weren’t looking during game night. Both of them were curious and she is interested to know about that hummingbird tattoo, it’s not common, despite what you might say.
“Then it’s because I’m best friends with his friend’s soulmate,” you reason instead.
“No, it’s because Juan said that Marcus was trying to be polite but that he was interested in you.” Sydney tells you.
You feel the blood drain from your face shamefully fast, and your eyes dart up to meet your best friend’s. “He said that?”
“Yes.” She isn’t going to lie to you, Juan had told her that. “But, he also said that Marcus respects relationships and he’s not the type of man to make a move on you if you’re in a relationship.” She knows how you feel about that kind of thing and she agrees with you.
“Well…I mean…that’s good? Isn’t it? That just means he’s respectful.” Still , you find yourself sitting on the idea that Marcus likes you and being halfway between mortified and grinning. It feels ultimately childish and yet like your chest is filling full of something very much like joy.
“According to Juan, Marcus Pike is the best man, the best person that he’s ever known.” Sydney acknowledges with a nod, deciding not to comment on your giddy expression. “Even though he was busy with training at the academy, he was always helping with housework or running errands to take care of things.” She shrugs. “His ex-wife was a med student. So I guess she’s a doctor now.”
“It’s just a coincidence.” This mantra of yours is going to get old quick, but you have a partner. A long term one, even. One that until a week or so ago, you had thought you had a future with. Now that resolve is waning and you don’t really know how you started to question yourself so easily.
Sensing that you’ve dug your heels in, she backs off, giving a small shrug. “I’m sure it is.” She hums. “So what are your Valentine’s Day plans with Sam?” She asks. “Did he plan something romantic?”
“We’re going to dinner and then a community fundraiser in his district.” It doesn’t sound romantic, you will admit that, but anything too luxurious you did can be perceived in a very wrong way by the general public if it gets out. A Congressman and the First Daughter going to a spa getaway or the symphony would be seen as being out of touch with the people. “He…wants to talk about the future.”
“And you don’t sound like it’s a conversation that you are eager to have.” She sits down, her own herbal tea in front of her and she frowns slightly.
“I’m…not sure, honestly.” Without hesitation and without filter, the explanation about your conversation with Judge D’Amario’s wife and what Sam said at dinner with them comes tumbling out of your mouth and you can’t help but cringe to yourself when you get it all out in the open air. “Am I overreacting? Please tell me I’m overreacting.”
Sydney winces and gives you a small shrug. “He has known from the beginning that you aren’t the type to want to be a typical politician’s spouse and give up your career.” She reminds you. “Remember that night out in Alexandria? Where we were bar hopping? I had a very frank conversation with him about that.”
“You did?” Your forehead scrunches as you take a sip of coffee. “Then why would he think I would be willing to have someone else manage the inn?”
“I don’t know if I can answer that.” She admits quietly. “But I think he gave them his true ideal. You quitting and being by his side for all his accomplishments.”
“It’s not that I’m not proud of him.” Some would argue that that is what it signals, but you and Sydney are not those types of people. “He’s doing such good work, and I do want to have kids and a house and all that domestic stuff. I just…I don’t want to give up working. And I don’t want to spend the rest of my life standing behind a podium waving politely. I’m—I want to be me, not an extension of my partner.”
“I know that.” She reaches out and takes your hand. “But does Sam? Really? I think that he can convince you that it’s what you want.” She huffs. “I know he’s a good guy, but is he the right guy?”
“Not everybody finds perfect,” you remind her quietly, knowing that that is exactly what she has with Juan. Their version of perfect is about support, respect, and unending silliness, and you’ve always craved the same. But there aren’t many men in the world like Juan. Not many at all.
“That doesn’t mean you need to settle.” She tells you, squeezing your hand gently. “If you are happy, I’m happy. All I want is for you to be happy.”
“To be honest?” Closing your eyes for a second to swallow a sigh, the best you can do is shake your head. “I didn’t think I was settling. But now I can’t help but wonder…”
“Then you owe it to yourself, and to Sam, to make sure before you commit any further.” She suggests, knowing that you would feel horrible about divorcing later on.
“How?” It’s an honest question, since the situation is tangled up in guesses and implied maybes. “Break up with Sam because Marcus might be my soulmate? What happens if I’m wrong and I regret the whole thing? Sam would never take me back and I would deserve it.”
“Ask Marcus to show you the tattoo.” She hums. “That’s not cheating. It would be no different than seeing him in swimming trunks.”
“If he ever responds to me.” Which you sort of doubt. You sort of did just drop plans with him the second your boyfriend called. But you are the kind of person who makes your relationship a priority. You always have been.
“And if he doesn’t….” She shrugs. “You just deal with that.” She frowns. “But I would be upset if you had done the same to me.”
“I’m not saying he doesn’t have a right to be upset with me.” Marcus has a right to feel however he feels. He’s human, after all. “This whole thing is just so out of left field. Especially after spending all of last year talking about freedom of affection and being happy with a partner who isn’t your soulmate.”
“Except you had never potentially met your soulmate.” She pauses and shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter, if you don’t want to pursue it, don’t. Juan won’t say anything and I’ll just encourage him to hang out with Marcus on a guys night.”
“I don’t know,” you admit honestly, poking at the remains of your breakfast with a frown. “First let’s see if he speaks to me again. I gotta go change my clothes for work.” A heavy blanket of tension works on you that wasn’t there when you came home, and you drag yourself off the stool with a swallowed sigh. “Thanks for breakfast, honey.”
“I’m sorry.” She murmurs, wishing for a moment that Juan hadn’t run into Marcus. Hadn’t mentioned a tattoo that was throwing you into a spin. “I’m here whenever you need.”
“Thank you.” Coming around the counter, you wrap your arms around her tightly and inhale, trying to remember your yoga and let the stress roll off your shoulders and not carry it into the work day. “And I’m always here for you. No matter what.”
“I know.” She grins into your shoulder. “You’re my best friend, bitch.” She teases. “I will go to war for you, bury bodies and not even think twice.”
"No hesitation." You link your pinkies together, the same way you have since you were little kids. "I really have to go change now. But thanks for listening to me ramble and fret."
“Anytime.” She scoffs, waving away your thanks. “You’ve listened to me plenty.” Lately it’s been about being a good mother and not completely wrecking Baby Badillo, but she understands the need to just vent. You’re there for one another, both of you, through thick and thin.
______
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woofwof21 · 4 months
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MOVIE DATES / CHRIS STURNIOLO
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idk if im back or not but here's something !!
also i had no idea what to make the title be but this'll do ig lol
warnings? idk: chris sturniolo x reader, use of y/n, use of cursewords, fluff, relatively long story i think
"chris, come onnnn!!!"
i wiggle my hand around in the air, impatiently waiting for my boyfriend to finally get out of the car while he has the AUDACITY to suddenly take ages with the most simple task of pressing down onto a little button and getting his ass off the damn seatwarmer.
"hold onnn, babe! ill be right with you", he replies and after a few more loud clashing noises and plastic ruffling he finally steps out of the passenger seat, slamming the car door shut.
my eyes widen, noticing his hands gripping onto a tiny quarter-shaped box in one and an even tinier plastic bag in the other.
"for you", he proudly announces with the most stupidest grin spread wide across his cheeks that causes a teenage-girl-like giggle to escape my lips.
as chris walks up closer, holding the contenments in his hands right up to me, i recognise lots of strawberries stacked up on one another in the plastic bag. the bag is sweetly decorated with tiny hearts that were, respectfully, pretty obviously drawn onto by chris....and a shiny, golden string is tied into an average looking bow around the top as closure.
"oh my god, baby are you serious??!"
my voice echoes loudly through the entire parking lot, but i don't even care. i shift my gaze to look back into his beautiful eyes and notice the smile on his face softened into a look that pretty much expressed his love to me in all the right ways which causes my stomach to tighten with butterflies that fill it up to the brim.
"i saw a little fruit stand on a street and thought like 'oh y/n likes strawberries!', so i got you strawberries", he explains nonchalantly as if this wasn't the most adorable thing he could've ever possibly done.
"that is SO sweet!! thank you SO much!!!"
my arms snake through the small space between arms and torso, wrapping them around his waist to give him a good squeeze.
he chuckles while draping his arms over my shoulders. i feel the warm palm of his hand rub up and down my back while casually giving me the warmest, most comforting hug i'll ever receive.
"you're welcome"
i feel his soft lips swiftly brush against my forehead in a light kiss before pulling put of the embrace.
he shoves the gifts right up against my chest, into my arms and places his hand on the small of my back, gently pressing down to set my feet back into walking pace.
"we're gonna miss the movie", he states as he guiding me through the parking lot and i roll my eyes while silently inspecting my presents, twisting and turning the box wich appears to have some chocolates inside and running my thumb over the adorable little drawn on hearts on the plastic bag.
"wait, we can't take those with us into the movie theater, babe!"
i look up to him with worried eyes and notice the corner of his lips curling up into a smirk. the devious glint in his eyes causes my brows to furrow in confusion. what the fuck is that fucker on.
"don't worry, i know what to do"
???
as we reach the frontdoors of the building i trip on my feet, feeling his hand wrap around my arm and pulling me to the side.
he grabs the box from my hand and slides it under his hoodie before snatching the strawberries out of my grasp and shoving them under my shirt aswell.
all i can do is give him a disappointed look and shake my head left to right...that was his solution??
"dude, you can CLEARLY see this, chris you can't be serious", i exclaim while running my hand over the very obvious bulge on my shirt which even causes the plastic to crinkle and echo through the whole goddamn street!
chris laughs at the plain disappointment my furrowed brows presented and presses his lips on my wrinkled forehead as he places his hand on the bump.
"we're pregnant!!", he announces with a way too proud grin like he made the creation of the century
"you're fucking kidding me"
chris once again breaks out into a fit of laughter. he's enjoying this a little too much and the fact that he's being absolutely fucking adorable about it irritates me even more. how the fuck am i supposed to be mad at this dumbass when he's like this????
once he's FINALLY calmed back down he grips onto my hand, dragging me back to the entrance and i defeatedly stare at the stupid smirk that remained spread wide from cheek to cheek, showing off his teeth "come on"
we step inside the movie theater and my heart starts racing in thoughts of what the fuck would actually happen if they caught us.
i mean obviously they would just throw the food into the bin and then just continue on following to the script, tell us to enjoy our movie and have a nice day and whatever....
'oh my god, what if the cops get involved??'
'girl calm down, it's just food, no one really gives THAT much of a shit'
'wait, maybe they're gonna just start laughing and give us a pass!'
'okay you're not THAT special'
i get pulled out of my thoughts at the feeling of chris' lips press against my forehead and look up to him confused as he once again smirks down at me. he leans closer to my ear, his arm that is now draped around my shoulder squeezes me slightly more against his chest and a shiver runs down my spine once his breath hits my neck and the softness of his whispering-voice travels through my ear.
"told you we'd make it through"
my head practically jolts to look behind us and i now realize we've surpassed the security. holy shit, was i deep in thought.
k bye 😭
i've been tryna get myself to write like..not about chris for once heh but like idfk this is like my forth time writing like a one shot ever anyway so like whatever
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