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britbritwrites · 4 years

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Chop Top having a daughter with S/O

(A/N: Alright y’all! So I’m a little obsessed with Chop Top right now and surprise surprise, I make a headcanon about him having a kid with S/O 😂😂😂😂😂 I tried my best making this and I hope y’all like it!)

• When you first announced that you were pregnant, he was absolutely OVER THE FREAKIN’ MOON!

• He didn’t care about how the baby of the gender was gonna come out, all he cared is that he was gonna be a dad

• He wanted to name the baby

• But you wanted to too

• Y’all did a rock paper scissors on it

➼ “Rock paper scissors, shoot!”

• Chop chose rock and you chose scissors

➼ “HA! R-rock beats scissors! I WIN! I g-get to name our daughter a-and you don’t!”

• ANYWAYS! Fast forward!

• His daughter would be a total Melophile

• (A Melophile is a person who loves music)

• Just like her father is

• Thanks to him showing her some golden oldies from his time

• And letting her listen to the radio all the time

• For her 1st birthday, Chop gave her a radio of her own to have

• She would probably say his some of his catchphrases since she hears them sometimes

➼ “Music is my life! That’s what daddy says!”

➼ “Far out, man!” She says with a big grin and peace sign.

• The things she learns from her father.

• She has heard him cuss in front of her and unfortunately repeated some of them

• Drayton heard this and tried to hit her with a broom

• But you stop him and say you’ll handle this since you were her mother

• She tells you that she heard the words from her daddy

• You reminded her to never say those “bad” words and never say them just because Chop said them

➼ “I’m sorry, mommy. I won’t say them again if it makes you upset”

• You then tell Chop to watch his language around her

• He surprisingly “does”

• Just not in front of you though

• Secretly, when you’re not around, him and your daughter curse up a storm

• There will be singing!

• TONS of singing from both of them nonstop

• Getting on Drayton’s last nerve to the point he threatens to give them both the broom

• (She loves her uncles but Drayton isn’t her favorite mostly for that reason)

• When she was born, he would play her his favorite tunes

• And even used to sing to her

• He can’t sing for crap but he tries

• She’d be a total daddy’s girl

• While she does love both you and Chop

• But she loves her dad more

•Chop’s nickname for her would be “lil princess”

• He would totally spoil her

• And would literally would do anything for her

• Like ANYTHING no matter what the circumstances are

• If she wanted a new album from her favorite rock band

• Chop Top would NO DOUBT go to serious circumstances to get it for her

➼ “Momma? Daddy? My birthday is coming up!”

➼ “W-what do you want f-for your birthday, lil princess?

➼ “I want the new Joan Jett album that just came out!”

➼ “Alright, d-daddy will get it for ya!”

• She’s a huge fan of Joan Jett and talks about how she wants to grow up to be just like her

• (Although, I think she would grow up to be bit of a metal head but she does like all rock music)

• She tells y’all she wants to be a singer when she grows up

• Y’all, mostly Chop, support your daughter’s dreams

• For Christmas, you bought her a kids microphone to sing into and carry around

• Nubbins will record videos of her little concerts she puts on occasionally

• Bubba enjoys them probably more than the whole family

• Drayton cringes due to her “bad” singing

➼ “Oh dear god, let this be over!”

• She would ask about his plate

➼ “Daddy, what’s that silver thing in your head?”

➼“T-that’s my plate”

➼ “How did you get it?”

• He doesn’t like talking about Vietnam that much

• Nor does he go into detail

• So he just tells her he “had a bad accident” while he was far away from home

• Chop Top would definitely be overprotective of his daughter

• Fast forward again!

• Imagine when she gets a boyfriend when she’s a teenager, WOOOAH NELLY!

➼ “H-hey, kid! You break my little girl’s h-heart, I’m gonna eat yours!”

➼ The boy thought Chop wouldn’t be serious

➼ But he is! He’s DEAD serious

➼ “Yes sir! Your daughter will be in good hands! I promise!”

• Or Just IMAGINE when the boy is a playboy, making her believe he likes her and asks her out on a date only to stand her up as a cruel prank, leading her to end up running away home in tears

• When she told him what had happened, Oh man! That will NOT end well!

• Chop would be ENRAGED!

➼ “I-I’m gonna KILL HIM! Tell me w-where he is and I’ll handle it”

• He’d go out in the middle of the night to find that little shit so he could teach him not to mess with his little girl

• He ended up being breakfast, lunch and dinner

• Your daughter KNOWS what happened to that boy

• And guess what? She doesn’t care *shrugs*

• (In hers and Chop Top’s eyes, he deserved it)

• After all, her family IS the Sawyers and she’s proud of being a member of the family

• In fact, when she was a kid, Chop Top taught her about the family tradition

• And how to kill victims

• When she was a kid, about 9 years old, she committed her first kill but it wasn’t another kid

• It was a grown ass man but he wasn’t innocent when it happened

• He damn near tried to attack your daughter while she was playing outside with her dolls

• And guess what happened?

• YUP! You guessed it!

• Chop Top, Nubbins and Bubba heard the screams that went on outside and saw what was happening, they ganged up on the guy, knocking him out cold and dragging him into the house.

• They tie him up in the basement and torture him for a bit

• Chop stabs the guy making him scream in pain

• As he should

• He gives the knife to his daughter……….

• (She was angry that he had tried to hurt her and possibly kidnap her)

• .............And gets to stabbing him multiple times until he was dead

• The family cheers her on and talks about how proud they are for her first kill, especially Chop Top who’s especially proud

➼ “W-wait to go, lil princess! I-I’m so proud of you!” Chop praised her, hugging her. “Y-you really do have that Sawyer b-blood kickin’ in!”

• She loved when her dad was proud of her and loved seeing him happy, it made her feel great and warm inside

• She’s a sweet, intelligent girl and takes after some of your traits

• But doesn’t take kindly to assholes

• She doesn’t believe in killing folks for the hell of it but believes killing when well deserved

• Chop doesn’t mind though or care of her reasons of killing because at the end of the day, to him, she still makes him proud by killing

• It’s like what Drayton says “The Saw is family”

• And she was proud to be apart of it

• Both you and Chop are proud of the little girl you raised

• But of course, he thinks he does a better job at raising her and would wanna take all the credit

#Chop Top Sawyer #Chop Top #texas chainsaw massacre #Texas chainsaw massacre 2 #texas chainsaw 2 #chop top x reader #slashers #Headcanons #chop top sawyer x reader #slasher headcanons #slashers imagines #texas chainsaw #slasher #horror slasher #tcm 2 #Imagines #TCM #horror #Slasher x reader

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theadorablespderman · 5 years

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Everything to love about Far From Home not in this order:

Literally seeing that opening with all our loved avengers that are no more.

Whitney Houston “I will always love you” made me cry because damnit Tony’s face was right THERE! NOT OK!

The blip footage was pretty damn funny not gonna lie.

Peter’s cute ass plan to tell MJ how he feels.

MJ’s favorite flower being a Black Dalia because of the murder. Literally a girl I can relate too. Murderinos for life sister. Idk but it just made her sooo relatable!

The fact that Brad is a kid grown up from the blip and that made him seem all the weirder for MJ.

Jealous Peter was so freaking amazing! Oh my gosh! That face he’d get. I’m a sucker for jealousy and they did it so good.

Making MJ this awesome character she was before but also obviously has this softer layer where she does have flaws and insecurities and she’s really sweet but also so badass. That was amazing.

The starting relationship between Peter and Beck. It was cute and so I was sad knowing that Beck was somehow going to be the villain.

Also let’s talk about how Beck is basically Syndrom from the incredibles.

That scene with Peter and Brad....the pure terror when he snapped that picture

Also seeing how big of a dick Brad is and how unhealthy jealous he was.

“Nick Fury” getting ghosted, showing up in Venice, tranquilising Ned (don’t touch him you monster) and then promptly highjacking Peters Summer trip.

Showing the emotional trama Peter is going through. The anxiety, the greiving. It was very reminiscent of Iron Man 3 when Tony suffers from PTSD after the battle of New York. I loved that they showed Peter reacting as any kid would, many adults too, which is to just try and forget anything happened but being faced with the reality every day. So well done.

Happy and May’s relationship. Enough said 😂😂

I feel cheated we didn’t see Mr delmore again.

Addressing all the problems the Blip/Snap created. High school aging, school, drinking ages, homelessness and housing issues. That’s just the start of it I’m sure but they covered those pretty well and I love that.

The technology that made Beck into Misterio was so well done. Instead of some frankly, kinda far fetched story that he came from an alternate earth (which I was willing to believe but felt it was a cop out in terms of plot and character) they showed the real world issues that superhero’s can create. The Enemies that have a real deep rooted hatred for hero because they’ve personally been betrayed or wronged by them. Because marvel has always made clear, everyone is not on the hero’s side.

Steeping Misterio’s powers in tech which is classing marvel but again, so brilliantly done in this movie. I loved the development. Because at first glance, half way through, I was thinking “wow this is really kinda weird and unexplained and too witchcraft for what marvel usually brings to the superpower backstory” I know it’s weird to say after everything marvel has done. But it seemed just a tad out there without being too hard to grasp. Which again was brilliantly done because that was the whole point.

The nod to Misterio’s helmet even when Beck was in the hologram suit watching everything play out. I guess it was his screen? But I loved the staple of even without his big over the top suit he still had the trademark helmet. Great costume design.

Peter’s soft gazes towards MJ. Nearly gave me a cavity they were so sweet! Ahhh sooo cute

Mr. Harrington’s marital problems nearly made me pee my pants....we all knew here in the fandom that shit like that would half to happen but my god lol

The opera scene was sooo freakin cute and that one step Peter took when he saw Brad move in was so freaking cute and hot!

MJ running after him and finding the critical peice of information to crack the case wide open. Loved it.

Betty and Ned’s Sicily sweet romance that you knew couldn’t possibly last. They really nailed the realistic high school romance. But I still ship it.

The bus scene was epic. And when Peter knocked Flash out...god it was amazing.

Mj obviously having love eyes towards Peter same as he does for her.

THE FACT THAT HE ACTUALLY BOUGHT THAT NECKLACE FOR HER OH MY GOD! I CANT GET A GUY TO TEXT ME BACJ LET ALONE BUY A NECKLACE LIKE THAT WHICH PROBABALY COST A GOOD CHUNK OF CHANGE IT WAS SO FREAKING AMAZING AND CUTE AND TOUCHING.

All the iron man images got me feeling depressed as hell

“are you being serious because I was only like 67% sure?” That was amazing. Seeing MJ get so excited and trying to keep that hidden was awesome

The fact that she was so pleased with herself but also played it hella cool when Ned walked in and she said she figured it out. Literally that is me.

The shirtless Peter trope that we all wanted and freaking got! So freaking cute how she tried to peak at his abs. Like understandable girl.

The fucking illusions. Turning our sweet trusting Peter into a ball of mess. I was too.

God when he had to tell himself it wasn’t real but it still totally feels like it is.

Him trying to save MJ when she’s “thrown off the Eiffel Tower”

Every traumatizing thing Beck shows and tells him during the illusion. So shitty.

Seeing Tony’s grave, seeing iron man come out. That was awful and we all felt it in the movie because we’ve lost him too. We could FEEL that slap same as Peter.

Beck telling Peter that Tony’s death was his fault. I was abouta hurl myself at the movie screen.

Every illusion done in a way that just when you think it’s over, it’s never stopped. You forget what’s real and you feel trapped in it same as Peter does.

WHEN HE GETS HIT BY THE TRAIN!!!!!!!!!! Nearly had a damn heart attack!!!! My mom had to look over and ask if I was ok because I literally stopped breathing for a solid 30 seconds.

Showing gradually just how insane and evil Misterio was.

HAPPY BEING CONCERNED FOR PETER! LIKE SINCERELY AND HONESTLY CONCERNED! It’s good to know he’s got Happy to take care of him and May but that Peter still has a father type figure he can count on after Tony. Because you know Tony wouldn’t have put up with any of that getting hit by a train shit.

Also where the hell was Karen? We missed her. We got Edith but Karen wouldn’t have let Misterio take her over. WHERE WAS KAREN!!

Peter crying and needing to know Happy was real. Broke me heart

That hug between them was so sweet and you can see the concern on Happy’s face

Happy and Peter opening up to each other was so awesome considering their relationship in Homecoming.

ALL THE TONY and PETER PARRELLS! All of them!!!!!!!!! Not the people saying “Spider-Man’s the next Ironman” no the actual hints and glimpses at how similar him and tony actually are. The hologram gauntlet shot, a straight parallel to Iron Man when Tony is building his first real suit. Obviously “Back in Black” by Led Zeplen (formally known as AC/DC) playing. Another obvious hint toward Tony. The Stark sunglasses. Peter falling with the parachute and it literally looks like Ironman with his jet stream behind him from a distance. There’s so much more I’ll do a whole other post on.

Of course: “I love Led Zeplin!” Hahaha it’s such a kid thing to say! I’ve said it before I knew the big differences between AC/DC and Led Zeplin. It was so freaking perfect.

Peter making his suit and Happy’s face. Bittersweet and I live for the affection he holds for Peter now.

The Netherlands Holding cell...must I say more?

Brad’s downfall and MJs amazing comment about him taking pictures of people in the bathroom. Ep-ic. Even flash was like “bro that’s so weird”

Mr. witchcraft was hilarious and I loved his aside with Brad “I’m gonna be the cool teacher and tell you you can’t do that anymore.”

Flash is definately Gay or Bi and I’m so here for it. That wink he makes to Peter proves it.

All the near death truths in the vault of the tower.

MJ BADDASS COMES SWINGING WITH THE MACE AND IT WAS LEGINDARY OH MY GOD! YES GIRL! She’s my idol I love her so much.

Peter and his “Peter Tingle” And while we’re on the subject the banana he gets to the face while packing.

Important. His amazing skills at the end trusting his instincts (which is great because May says in regards to MJ, but it applies to this too) May tells Peter to trust his instincts and don’t think too much. And that’s what he does when he defeats Beck.

The bad ass “you can’t fool me anymore” after redirecting the gun away from his head at the end. Literally was so intense and well done.

Peter and MJ’s kisses! I loved how awkward it was at first and the slightly less awkward one. They really accurately captured the awkwardness of teenagers in love. Like that’s what it’s like guys.

Show me MJ’s parents you cowards, or show me something. Anything. I just want to know the nature of the situation.

Ned and Betty’s breakup. So funny and honestly not surprising at all. But still I ship them.

The hand hold. So cute.

May and Peter still being the cutest aunt and nephew duo there ever was.

I totally thought Peter was going to end with telling the world he was spiderman....BUT SOME OTHER ASSHOLES DID IT FOR HIM AND MADE HIM INTO A VILLAN AND IM PISSED. LOOKING AT YOU MR JAMESON YOU PEICE OF SHIT.

The movie ended and I have no idea what’s next.

Mid credit of MJ swinging through New York. Home girl doesn’t like and neither do I. Looks full on terrifying we don’t blame you hun.

After credit where the skrulls have been playing Maria and Nick fury for the whole movie. Honestly it made more sense because Nick fury seemed just a bit off. ALSO WHERE IS THE REAL NICK FURY at and I’m so psyched to see where this new movies are gonna go!

Alright that all for now folks!!!! Everything about the movie was great!!! I will have to watch again ad see if anything more pops up. Sorry for any spelling errors I’m on my phone.

#peter parker #marvel #spiderman #mcu #michelle jones #spideychelle #spider-man #spider-man: homecoming #avengers #tony stark #ned leeds #spiderman far from home #spider man: far from home #far from home spoilers #spoilers

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argylemikewheeler · 5 years

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|| i saw this post and just had the idea of will freaking out at mike for being tall-- but of course that’s not really what it’s about. just something short and sweet (literally) for you || ao3

It’s in the grocery store that Will just snaps at him. Will’s going shopping for his mom after school. It’s no big thing; Will enjoys the time alone. Except of course, it’s the last day before spring break and Mike’s skipped the last day of school and driven up to see him. Mike’s an extra set of hands to help brings bags into the house, and he’s not too bad of a driver to man the cart.

When Mike pulls up to the house-- just as Will’s grabbing his bag and getting to Jonathan’s car-- he looks so different. His hair is just a little shorter-- cropped and kept, just how Ted likes it, but with Karen’s kind influence of letting him be, Ted, come on. The main thing, at least to Will, is that he’s taller. The man is taller. Will feels his neck crack as he tilts back, just a little. He didn’t shrink, but when Mike runs up to him, he swears he did.

When Will is silent and stares at him for a while, Mike replies that he’s six-foot-two. Which is fine. It’s fine. It’s just that Will is five-foot-six still. But whatever. It’s fine.

Will kind of forgets about it-- forgets about how his new friends call him small. not short but small; how his new doctor is worried he’s stunted from all his “medical trauma” and is trying to talk his mother into having him take steroids; how he secretly likes being the same height because he knows his mom can’t afford buying both him and El new clothes; how he hates that the first thing people notice between him and Mike isn’t even that they’re two men since Will’s short enough to match people’s perception of what “normal” couples look like. Will just forgets about it. And for a while it’s nice.

Mike doesn’t know jack shit about vegetables and Will teaches him how to pick fruit that is just the right amount of unripe so it will last longer in the fridge. Mike pushes the cart and nods, at least pretending he’s enjoying the lesson. It’s 1988 and Mike places his hand on Will’s back when he stands and stares at the wall of soup cans, trying to read prices and brands quickly. It’s 1988 and Will doesn’t even watch how he says “Michael”. It’s a nice outing until they get to the cereal aisle.

It is nearly cleaned out, all the extra boxes up on the top shelf in disorganized storage stacks. Will groans and steps up onto the bottom shelf, his hand straining as he feels around for a box of something. His ribs are pressed to the middle shelf and he tries to keep from swearing. There’s an older lady with two young kids that’s been watching them since they arrived in the aisle-- Mike’s hand gently finding Will’s-- and Will doesn’t want to give her any ammunition to start shouting.

“Would you like some help, Will?” Mike laughs and grabs him under the arms. He hoists Will nearly like he’s weightless, helping him step down to the floor again.

Will sighs. “Yes.”

“What do you want?” Before Will can answer, Mike is sliding box after box down and placing them on the shelves in front of Will’s eye line. “I’ve got ‘em all.”

“I just needed the Cheerios, thanks.” Will grumbles, taking the box and tossing it into the cart. He pushes the cart and they leave the woman’s stare. He feels tense all over again. He forgets to keep forgetting about it-- about everything-- for a moment.

“How do you do this without me.” Mike is simply trying to tease him-- be verbally affectionate when his hands can only jostle his shoulders. “I need to think about moving up here you don’t have to struggle every time you just want to buy something--”

“Shut up, Mike.”

“W--What? What did I say? Was it that you’re short? Because... Will, we know this. It’s my favorite thing about you, you know that.”

“I don’t really want to hear it right now.” Will isn’t aware he’s clenching his teeth until he hears himself speak. “Being small is kind of not my favorite.”

“Oh, but-- It’s fun! You fit right under my arm and you don’t really need to steal as much of the blankets when we sleep--”

“Mike.” Will tries to drop out from under Mike’s arm: he placed it around his shoulders to demonstrate his point. Will is suddenly very aware that they’re two men, even if from every other angle no one seems to notice because he’s... a full eight inches shorter than Mike. It doesn’t feel great to be able to excuse homophobia because he’s as short as a girl. “Mike, please shut up.”

“What?” He’s sincere, but he’s still very confused. He still thinks it’s about being short. He doesn’t move his arm. “OH, well, actually I do hate the whole you-get-to-steal-my-clothes-thing. But if those are the reparations--”

“Would you just shut up, Tall Boy!” Will snaps, twisting around to face Mike. They’re in the middle of the baby section, where no one would be likely to stumble into them.

“T-Tall Boy?” Mike laughs, but he’s still trying to figure out that Will’s genuinely upset. “I-- What? What happened? Did I say something?”

“Yes! Stop talking about how short I am. I hate it.” Will doesn’t know why but he chokes up a little. He pretends he needs to be looking at plastic sippy cups. They look so out of place when the older lady and her children come strolling past. “I hate remembering I’m short.”

“Remembering.” Mike repeats. “Do you... forget?”

“El grew four inches in like... two months.”

“Okay...”

“Mom had to buy her new skirts and jeans because they got too short, too fast. It was the middle of winter and her ankles were so chapped-- She worked another two shift to pay for it.” Will’s breathing is choppy and it’s so stupid. Mike is silent, but because he’s listening, which is still weird for Will to think about.

“Okay. So short is good. You’ve got all your clothes and you’ve got all mine if you need it. And I’m sure Steve’s got more stuff that’s up your alley. It’s okay. Will, it’s okay. I won’t let you go cold.” Mike places his hands on Will’s shoulders, his thumbs brush against his neck.

“They say I’m small at school.” Will pushes through. “Small. You know what else is small? Babies are small. Mistakes are small. OH and you know what is usually small? Girls. Girls are small-- except my sister. Who’s giant--”

“She’s only like... five-nine.”

“Mike.”

“Sorry, literal perspective I see is not the point here.” He nods. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s just-- People don’t think you’re gay sometimes.” Will realizes this doesn’t make sense to anyone but him.

“Uh. That’s... I’m not sure that’s our fault.”

“Well, see, it’s my fault. From a distance, I look like your girlfriend. Not a very, short short man.”

“Well, that’s not your fault. People are blind and weird and straight. That’s not-- You’re not a girl, Will. You definitely aren’t a girl nor look like one or act like one or-- You just aren’t. Being short is not a fault!”

Will sighs and leans into Mike’s hand. “You’re supposed to say that. You’re my boyfriend.”

“I could complain-- would you like me to?” Mike says with a smile. His eyebrows are still furrowed though: he’s upset. “I hate that you can fit comfortably on any bed we share. I hate that... You sometimes can buy kids’ shirts? Because they’re always cooler. Like, you have one you bought as a painting smock that has a freakin shark on it and I gotta say... Men’s clothes, not as cool! I’m less cool as my art school boyfriend because I got tall too quick. Dude, that sucks. I want to be cool like you!”

Will is definitely crying, but he doesn’t acknowledge it. He laughs and smiles. He hopes it makes up for his sniffling. “You think I’m cool?”

“Yeah! My cool, short boyfriend. He’s awesome and he’s super nice because he... worries about the socio-political meaning of him being short. Like. He’s so smart. So smart.”

“He’s the only one who knows what the hell a mango is in your relationship.” Will says, wiping his eyes.

“Yeah! Concentrated intelligence!” Mike reaches for Will’s underarms again. He catches Will’s smile before jokingly hoisting him an inch off the ground. “He’s better because of-- everything, but right now let’s say it’s because he’s not a six-foot-two monster who hits his head on every door frame in his house.”

“Oh my god-- is that what that bump is from?” Will hiccups, laughter nearly scaring him. “Oh, Michael, you poor.... tall thing.”

They laugh in the baby aisle until Will’s face is less red and puffy. As they walk, Mike makes jokes about the weird names of food brands. He offers to get Will things on all shelves, just being a helpful partner rather than a shopping giraffe. He repeats Will’s name every time he speaks to him and someone is in earshot. Will smiles and each time calls him a sappier and sweeter version of “Michael”. Will finishes shopping and feels rather accomplished as they pack the car up.

He forgets about everything again for a while. Everything but Mike. Well, Mike, but more importantly how he makes him feel: so happy, so listened to, so short. And it’s all okay. It’s nothing. Just one small thing in a short life full of so many wonderful, loving things.

#byeler #byler #mike wheeler x will byers #stranger things writing #this could have a trans reading bc ya know *i* wrote this but like take it however you want #just something i wrote during my essay break #prompts

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thereturnofthedirtyblog · 5 years

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The DIRTY DIRTY Tea 🍵👀

I did the preface to this post as there are thousands here on the blog. Many are avid participants and then there are hundreds that are watching and reading. I am going to say this now and heed my words: If you are here because you are in love with Zak, feel he is something you idolize or just are blind to how actual humans are then stop now. This blog was not easy to create for me. Why do I keep going? The more girls that see this blog and run the other direction from Zak is worth it. There are those girls (to many to count) that want to hook up with Zak cause he is a celebrity crush. They get flown in by Zak for a weekend then are on a plane home. They move on with that memory. However, there are many girls that believe they are the one and only dating him. Its a web of manipulation and verbally abusive behavior that impedes their mental health. They get “screwed” over literally and sideways from him. As for Holly, she is almost 40 so IMO if Zak wants to screw her over till the end of time I really don’t care! Why? She has 20 years at least on Zak’s preferred flavor of girls. She has sniffed, sucked, fucked, blown, and done probably everything sexually and for money. So here we go...again...do not read if you are going to freak out. I will put my commentary in ( ).

1. So the girl that contacted me gave me all the receipts you could want: photos, plane ticket, phone number, etc...she was on point. She did ask NOT to show them as she does want to maintain her privacy. As always this is verified and you all that have been here a long time know my credibility (<--Bad GA pun). We here at the blog did catch her in a Zak IG story and I will leave it at that.

2. She @ him on social media and he slid right into her DM’s. He right away asked how old she was and where she was from. (I never can get out of my mind the “U in Vegas” line that he does often- TDB). Quickly it went to phone and text conversations. She is under the age of 21 and really pretty with a rockin’ body.

3. A few weeks later she was on a plane to see Zak for the weekend. He bought her the plane ticket and Bacon picked her up from the airport in the Rolls. She knew going into the situation that it was going to be a hook up so no illusion of a relationship. She was transported to the house and she stayed in the guest room (the infamous room where the girls always stay except Rosie was in the master-TDB) She also confirmed that he does not sleep in the master bedroom and never got to see his actual room he sleeps in. (We all know it is the one room with no windows-TDB) She felt odd in the house like she wasn’t allowed to roam around but did find it weird that Zak was in the master bedroom in the morning with all the windows open just looking out to the pool. She also did mention that she had to shut the door to her room so that Gracie wouldn’t shit or pee in the room since she will do that. (We all know here that it was confirmed Zak let Gracie shit and pee all over his master bedroom bed after the Rosie debacle. He has now turned that bedroom into a gym.-TDB)

4. Right when she got to the house it was right to having sex. He put NOOOOoooo effort into it, she was on top the whole time, and he didn’t take off his clothes. So yeah his glasses were on and he laid there like a slug while she did all the work. He did “direct” her to “get on top of him” or “suck on it.” She never got to choose what to do and always on top doing the work. Did she “get off?” HELL NO. He didn’t even try. Gracie was in the room the entire time watching and whining.

5. He did not use protection. (She did get tested when she got home and she is fine-TDB) He never asked her about her life or showed any interest in getting to know her at all.

6. The butt of the story. Yes, Zak loves butt and wanted to do anal really bad but she said no she wouldn’t do that butttttttttttttttt he did eat out her butt. (que those spitting out their tea right now-TDB)

7. They went to the museum a lot but he never introduced her to anyone. She had to do that herself since it felt like she was one of many that he brought there so she introduced herself to those there. She felt like they were giving her looks like “oh here is another young girl that Zak brought to work today” Kinda like show and not tell.

8. He talked badly about exes including Tay (the fitness girl) stating she was really into herself and he couldn’t take it anymore so he eventually ended it. (Now we know it went on a little longer than we thought so definitely Ashley/Tay were cross overs for a while. Sorry Ash if you are ready this. -TDB) He did mention about Tana and showed her IG page to the girl, but didn’t speak badly of her. (That is freakin’ odd-TDB)

9. The timing of her Zak weekend is a possible crossover with him “dating” Holly. He did proposition the girl recently while he did his last trip so yeah Zak is still out there “prowling” while “dating” Holly. (Sucks to be almost 40 and Zak is boinking those 18-22 eating their butts like a hungry wolf -TDB)

10. The weekend in her opinion was not fun and they barely hooked up more than a couple of times. Zak kept saying he “didn’t feel good” or was tired and that is why he didn’t put effort into it. (We all know Zak never makes an effort so he gives that line - TDB) However, when Zak wanted to have sex he was demanding and of course directing her on what he wanted her to do. (annoying- TDB)

11. He did mention Detroit and how horrible his life was there and if he hadn’t moved then he would be in jail or caught up in other bad things. (We all know he did spend time briefly in jail. - TDB) He mentioned that he doesn’t drink or do drugs since he had a problem with it in the past. She did think it was weird he had a full bar though! Other than that he talked about himself, the show, and the museum. BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

12. She stated that he IS a huge GERMAPHOBIC (Yeah but eats butts who knew? - TDB) and it was super annoying. He also is a huge HYPOCHONDRIAC and he wouldn’t even walk into certain places in the museum if under construction without freaking out that he was ingesting glue fumes. (I know this is so true. He freaks out if anyone sneezes around him and will ask you a zillion times if you are sick - TDB) The feeling that she got as well is Zak is afraid to age or have an aging body.

Overall, she had the weekend and moved on from it but she cringes thinking about the Holly crossover, his proposition while recently on the trip while dating Holly, the boring weekend, lackluster sex and that who Zak is in real life.

EDIT: CLARIFICATION

Just to clarify something as I am getting flooded with DM’s asking me my insight about why he doesn’t use protection. Zak does use protection (condoms) but I have noticed its with the older generation of women. My theory is based on hundreds under 25 that have stated no protection and those over that age that said he did use condoms. In his warped mind they are young and haven’t been “around the block” so more likely safe from diseases. That is just my take on it all! - TDB

#zakbagans #dirtyblog #zak bagans #ghostadventures #ghost adventures #submission #thedirtyblog #dirty blog #the dirty blog #[email protected]

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actuallykiwi · 4 years

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“My Monster Under the Bed” continuation

(This story was a prompt from @writing-prompt-s written by @bethanythemartian, and this is my continuation.)

The main reason I don’t like talking about it is because you have no idea how hard it was to explain it to the police. Do you really think anyone would believe “the monster under my bed ate an intruder”? Yeah, probably not.

His screams alerted all the neighbors, and I had to fabricate some story about how I was watching a horror movie and it was the screams of both the movie and I. The hard part was coming up with what horror movie I was watching, and I think I went with Scream or something.

The harder part was coming back to my room once they left and dealing with what was left of the intruder. They practically spit him out from under the bed, shaking and whimpering. I couldn’t help but feel bad for the guy. He seemed to be fine, aside from being obviously traumatized and missing his left foot.

Which, was funny, it wasn’t bleeding out. Oddly it was covered in some weird clear goop. I guess TUF (Thing Under the Fridge) let him off with a warning this time.

“Hey, I’m, uh, really sorry about your foot...” I crouched next to the guy, who cowered away from me. Another pang of guilt. “Sorry. My, uh, my Monster under the Bed is very protective of me. Could you do me a big favor, though?”

“Whatever you want, just keep the hell away from me!”

“Okay, if you could just tell the hospital, or wherever you’re going to get your leg looked at, that you were just attacked by wild dogs or something?”

I mean, his missing-foot-leg did have bite marks and what looked like slobber all over it, so it would be believable.

He agreed, and I helped him to the back door so the neighbors wouldn’t see him.

“You okay?” They asked as I plopped down onto my bed, shaking and a little traumatized myself. I would hear those screams for weeks. “Not really. Could you, like, not ever do that again?”

“Sssorry. Wasss protecting you.”

“I know, but, that was scary. But... thank you.”

See, I’m sure they would have gladly devoured the poor dude whole, but it was my pleading and begging not to kill him that made them hesitate. They settled for his foot, and kept him quiet while I dealt with the noise complaint.

That was a while ago. I hadn’t heard from the police since, so I guess they bought his dog story.

Life went on mostly normal from then on. It was weird having people over, though. One time, I brought a guy home, and we just watched movies and cuddled on the couch for most of the night. Anytime I wanted to drop food to TUF, I had to be discreet so he wouldn’t question it. I would make small chat with them when I went to the bathroom and they hid under the sink.

My discretion didn’t last, though. He eventually caught me getting ice for my drink and purposely spilling some onto the floor and under the fridge.

At first I tried to play it off as being clumsy and blaming my now non-existent back pain on not picking it up. This guy was smart, though, and he didn’t buy it.

I sighed and sat back down with him on the couch. I really liked this guy, and I figured if anyone should know about my hungry shy friend, it was him.

“Do you... Did you ever believe in monsters under your bed?”

He laughed. “I mean, I guess when I was little. Though it was more the one in the closet I was worried about.”

I laughed too. “Do you still believe, though? Do you ever wonder if they’re still around?”

Now he was growing a little concerned. “I... don’t guess so? I don’t know. Why are you asking?”

I sighed. “When I first moved in here, I accidentally found out that they do exist, well mine does anyway. I dropped some food under the fridge and they thanked me. And it’s kind of been our thing ever since. They are literally the monster under my bed.” Then I explained how it was actually kind, curious, protective, and always freakin’ hungry.

At this point, his expression was genuinely confused and a little worried, so I sighed again and gently kicked the side of the couch. “Hey, wanna say hi under there?”

For a few moments, I thought they were gonna leave me hanging, and make me look crazy in front of this guy.

Then, ever so quietly, almost shyly, “Hello.”

“Whoa!!!” He pulled his legs up on the couch quickly, but he was laughing nervously. “You weren’t joking... Holy crap, that is kinda creepy! It, uh... it won’t eat my feet right?”

“Oh, God, don’t say that.”

He laughed again. “Hey, uh, hey down there! How are you?”

“Good. Hungry. Cheeto?”

He looked at me and I nodded. Like a kid feeding a duck for the first time, he reluctantly tossed a Cheeto onto the floor.

“Can’t reach.”

At this point I was giggling. He looked like me a couple months ago when this all started. He gently nudged the Cheeto under the couch, then ducked upside down to try and see it. That same chuckle came from under the fridge. “Cannot see. Always move.”

“The Cheeto was gone! That was freaking cool!” He was like a little kid, and now I was in tears laughing.

This was what it was like for a while. He would come over to hang out often, though I think at this point it was to play with TUF. I didn’t mind, it was pretty entertaining.

Flash forward to 9 years later.

We’re married now, living in a big house with a dog and our 5-year-old little girl. TUF moved with us, like they always said they did. The dog knew they were there when we first got him. But it was very fond of its invisible friend, and loved them just as much as we did.

One night, while putting our daughter to bed, she finally asked the question.

“Mommy, why do you keep dropping food and ice under things?”

I exchanged a look with my husband, and smiled. So we told her. We told her about the Monster Under the Bed, but that it wasn’t mean, or evil, or anything bad. Just that it was shy, polite, and always, always hungry. She giggled and tested it out for herself by dropping a piece of candy under her bed.

“Thank youuu.”

She gasped and squealed with excitement, and maybe a little fear. Once we calmed her down, we finally got her to lie down. As we walked from her room, I heard her whisper. “Goodnight, Monster...”

“Goodnight, Little One.”

As I turned out the lamp for the night, I lie awake for a few minutes, wondering.

“Hey, Tuf...”

“Yesss?”

Their familiar voice slithered from our daughter’s room to ours.

“Do you think you could become her Monster, not mine? Not that I don’t want you around, but I think she needs you now more than I do. Plus, she already loves you.”

“If that is what you want, then yess.”

I smiled and got comfortable in bed, one arm hanging over the side. “Thank you. For everything.”

And then, maybe I imagined it from being half asleep or already dreaming, I felt something cool and smooth touch my hand, wrapping around it as if holding it.

“Alwaysss.”

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lizzybeth1986 · 5 years

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Quick Thoughts on The Royal Heir, Book 1 Chapter 1

• We're back! Hopefully with a better series this time, but I'm not going to keep my hopes too high.

• If my QTs are clogging up your dash, I recommend you block these particular tags: #trh quick thoughts, #trh qts, and optionally #long post.

• Much like my Book 3 QTs, I will be exploring as many playthroughs as I possibly can to see how each LI's route is being written. Last book, this experiment definitely helped me figure out that they were putting more effort into some characters and less into others, and I'd still like to keep an eye out for these things as much as possible.

• I feel this QT might be shorter than my usual (edit: joke's on me - it's not!! 🙈), mostly because the opening chapter itself is...pretty light, and is mostly meant for us to spend time and have fun with our chosen LI. Plus a tiny smidgen of buildup to the premise, which is having a child in Cordonia. But I do have a theory about the overall theme that I'm going to be expanding on towards the end of the chapter.

• Okay that's it for preliminary explanations, it's time for me to start with the chapter! XD

• Ooh. Oooooooh. This loading page now has tidbits about Cordonian society!! Interesting.

• Title: Happily Ever Afterwards

Alternative Title: Be Grateful We're Letting You Have This Much Sex For Free This Week, Because That's The Last Time It's Happening.

• I'm extremely offended they're making me wear that Pepto Bismol outfit again.

•

...thanks so much for reminding me you still don't care about Hana, PB! 🙄 Everyone else remains to be some version of "loyal", but Hana is still considered more for her skills than for her own steadfastness, even though she was the most hardcore-loyal of the four (SHE LEFT HER FREAKING HOME. HER FREAKING FAMILY. FOR YOU. While the other three were certainly loyal and honorable to the MC, they definitely didn't have to completely cut ties with their families to do right by the MC).

• The "fairytale" aesthetics of the frame story were what drew people into TRR in the first place, so it's not too surprising that the LIs and MC give a nod to the flagship series with a "once upon a time". If you're with Liam, it goes straight from "falling in love with the Prince" to what his relationship with her taught him, before the happily ever after. If you're with one of the other three LIs, it specifies that she came there for Liam but fell for someone else. Sounds a lot like Maxwell's book 😄 In Maxwell's playthrough, in fact, there is a reference to it when the MC calls him a "famous author".

•

(Screenshots organized as follows: 1 - Liam, 2 - Drake, 3 - Maxwell, 4 - Hana. Liam's and Hana's are my own. Drake's from @thefirstcourtesan, and Maxwell's from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel).

The other interesting thing to note is that in Liam's playthrough, he leads the narration. While in everyone else's the MC is the one who steers it. One reason I can think of is that the narrative still treats this story as Liam's story as much as it is the MC's (if I'm right about the theme) - which...has honestly always been a sore point with the fanbase in TRR. That would depend on how us and our baby are now further involved with Cordonia in the story. Another factor for why she leads the narration...could be that essentially, the MC took initiative in the other three relationships, while in Liam's case it was he who took a more active role by proposing to her.

• The little story ends with this question from the MC:

Question: But what happens after Happily Ever After?

Answer: Mess. In Cordonia it's always mess.

• Cordonians (specifically the upper classes, since I don't know enough about the common populace to tell, since they're, yknow, practically invisible) are addicted to tea, apples and fucking shit up where they don't even need to.

• ANYWAY. What (literally) happens after 'happily ever after' is a tropical honeymoon on Liam's private island. In the case of the other three, he allows them access to the place and gives the staff instructions on making the stay comfortable for them.

• Now, since Liam owns the island and has probably visited it a could times, he shows more familiarity with it. He tells his wife that on previous trips the island had more rustic accommodations, but the villa they're now staying in was prepared recently. Additionally, the butler welcomes Hana, Maxwell and Drake as newcomers to the island, considering it's their first time. With Liam, there is an air of familiarity - he calls the butler by his name (Javier) and enquires about him and his wife (Mariana) - to show us perhaps how familiar he is with this holiday spot.

• Why the hell does everyone call Liam "Your Highness"? It's been two whole books since he became King, and the proper title for a monarch is "Your Majesty". How is it that Constantine gets to rake the MC over the coals for calling him Your Highness, yet Liam has to hear this from practically everyone. From Javier to freakin' Protocol-Monitor-Madeleine! The disrespect, I tell you!

• Okay so we're having a candlelit dinner by the ocean, and we get our first OOTD. Cute beach dress, has bright flowers and some crochet work on the bodice. I bought it because I couldn't bear to have Esther stay another minute in that Pepto Bismol of a dress.

• LOL @ all the LI responses to "this spot is right where the sharks are!"

• Tuna sashimi and pineapple aioli, huh? I have never had either so idek what that's supposed to taste like (someone on this writing team likes pineapples). I remember having to cut down on tuna during pregnancy, which meant no more Subway sandwiches since the tuna sub was the only one I liked at the time. IIRC most of my family were also cautioning me against pineapples and papaya during my first trimester!

• My gosh this butler doesn't waste much time jumping into assumptions huh?

• Also Javier, why is Cordonia's future so dependent on the well-being of my foetus even if I'm not ruling the country?

• Does Cordonia have sex ed? My money is on no. (esp in the Hana route).

• So there are two parts to the way the premise of wanting to have kids is built up in this sequence. In the first part, the LI impresses upon the MC the need to have children soon after the wedding. The second part addresses the urgency - the "why right now?" factor, and explores the LI's personal emotions towards having children. This bit also feels a bit like a follow-up to the Valtoria balcony scene in Chapter 15.

• The first part is pretty similar for Drake, Hana and Maxwell - all three of whom are now married to a Duchess and are aware that securing the duchy is important. They word it in their own distinctive styles, but the gist is pretty much the same. In Liam's case, since he is the king of the country, he speaks more about Cordonia and its tensions with neighbouring countries.

Take note of this because I'll be returning to this point later. (also who are the writers trying to convince about Cordonia's size. "Small kingdom" my ass).

• I'll be going by the LIs' personal reasons to have a baby now, one by one, along with a summary of their views on children in the Valtoria balcony scene last book (since this scene clearly references that diamond scene if you've bought it last book).

(Screenshots: Liam's and Hana's screenshots are mine, Drake's is from @thefirstcourtesan and Maxwell's is from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel)

- Liam: Liam's love for family and need for children is well-known throughout the series. In Book 1, he's dropped hints about wanting to have a different kind of family dynamic from the one he'd experienced as a child, and in Book 2 there were multiple references to wanting to not be Constantine - both as a King and as a father. In the balcony scene in Book 3, Chapter 15, Liam tells us a number of things - about the value of having more heirs for succession, of him always dreaming of having at least 3 children, about Kenna, Cordonia's most legendary warrior queen which leads to an interesting factoid about how the rules of successions for both the throne and duchies are not gender-specific (he also cites Olivia and Penelope as being in line to inherit their duchies). In this sequence Liam undoubtedly has more to say about the political aspect of having an heir than the personal, but his statement about "someone missing" in their lives is of no surprise when he's been enthusiastic about kids for three books straight.

- Drake: Drake perhaps gets the lengthiest 'personal' bit of all, revolving around his eagerness to be a father and his own family history. This scene has Drake speaking of wanting a child with "your eyes and my hair", but most of all of Savannah and her little family, and wanting the happiness his sister is experiencing now. The writing often manages to tie Drake's thoughts about his future family with his past: in the Valtoria balcony scene, his memories of his father and his desire to bring up his own kids the way Jackson did are dominant in the conversation on children. He speaks at length about the absence of a proper 'home' so far in his life (stating that his room at the palace always felt like "a room in someone else's house") and how high on his priority list the prospect of having children is. The Valtoria scene shows him eager to have kids asap, and this scene builds up the same urgency. You're left in no doubt that he wants those kids now.

• Maxwell: Maxwell's route of this scene soundly pretty sudden, tbh. In his Valtoria scene, Maxwell expressed doubt and nervousness when it came to children, citing the example of Bartie ("I love palling around with little Bartie and everything, but if he bonks his head or something, I can just hand him back to Savannah. When it's your kid, you're the one people hand him to."). While this is referenced in TRH's dialogue when Maxwell jokes about forgetting diapers and baby socks - it's a pretty big jump from the man who didn't exactly feel ready to have children yet, and not enough work was done to justify that shift. This could be somewhat excused in the beginning of Book 3, when the narrative had just begun to treat him like an LI, but they've had an entire damn book and several months after to reflect on how to write him properly. That is...if they actually gave a damn.

- Hana: They don't even have the excuse of "relatively new LI" in Hana's case. Because she is the lone female LI married to a female MC, her scene should have been a lot more extensive and explored her urgency to have children so soon after their wedding, a whole lot more. There are tiny changes, like the one where she hints at the "logistical concerns" that come with two women considering a family, and where she speaks of giving her child the childhood she never had (which, frankly, is an extremely vague statement and could be applicable to more than one character in Cordonia). But there is urgency that, again, isn't properly explained in the scene. Even Hana's Valtoria scene doesn't have much that would explain why she would want a child barely weeks after her wedding. The Valtoria scene does have her outlining her dreams for the duchy (along with a joke about her enacting "Beauty and the Beast") and her happiness at the thought of being a mother (she maintains that out of the things expected of her, motherhood is the one she looked forward to). They could have spent some time thinking up a reason for why Hana would rush this, even before anything has happened, or outlined something personal and not ultra-generic. Both Maxwell and Hana deserved a lot better than this.

• Maxwell speaks about possibly forgetting diapers (PLS NO MAXWELL NO) and baby socks (um okay not as bad but depends on the climate), and one of the MC's dialogue options is to say..."diapers and socks are overrated". Guys your kid won't care how much fun you are when they have a bum rash.

• A-ha! Diamond scene. First-chapter diamond love scenes always come cheap in these series' (12 diamonds) and are usually quite a steal.

• ESTHER HAS NEW LINGERIE OMG I'M SO HAPPY I'D BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT FOR SO LOOOOONG 😭😭😭😭

• ...and it is also matches Liam's underwear. Maxwell's too 😅

• The scene is nice, there are variations between the ways the LIs work up their appetite before they finally roll in the...well, sand 😅 Maxwell has what they call an "ocean duel", Hana's fulfills her lifelong dream of carrying and spinning around her wife on a secluded beach, Drake chases the MC through the water...and Liam just enjoys being a huuuge tease, okay? 😂

• Oh God, why are they still using the old LoveHacks sexytimes music. That "DHUM-boom-ta-doom-DHUM" beat drives me nuts, and not in a good way. You have better music now, PB! Like the sexytimes tunes from RCD and PM. Use those!

• My gosh this entire group is quite horny for dominant duchesses, aren't they. Every last one of them. Each playthrough has these four gazing at the MC in wonder and telling her some variation of "I think you ordering me around is hot". Olivia could trample over them all with spiked heels and they would thank her!

• As always, when something suspicious happens, my dumbass MC goes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and never thinks about it again until shit actually goes down. This woman will never learn, will she.

• Anyway! We now move on to the rest of the honeymoon, summed up in three-four varying scenes per LI:

(Screenshots: Liam's and Hana's screenshots are mine, Drakes is HIMEME's YouTube channel, and Maxwell's is from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel).

- Liam: Focused and dedicated. And insatiable as hell. Sex on a bed (SHOCKING!), sex after his wife points out what could be an apple constellation during stargazing (the MC effectively killed Liam's boner for Cordonia, I see), sex after having chocolate strawberries at a sunlit pond, sex again on a bed (Why is he getting four? 🤔). While the staff is still around somewhere on the island. This is a man with a mission.

- Maxwell: Fun and playful - kind of a "let's live wild and do daredevilry while we can!" vibe. In one Maxwell and the MC cliff dive into the ocean, debating over the wisdom of such risky adventuring when they may possibly be having a baby. In another, the MC watches, concerned, as Maxwell eats a raw squid appetizer. There is a nice callback to Maxwell's House sigil - the kraken - when he tells her that a squid would never hurt a fellow squid. The third shows them playing Strip Monopoly in the comfort of their bedroom.

- Hana: Adorable, caring and looking through every detail. Hana's three scenes involve her showing the MC the sights around the sunlit pond (which Hana and the MC lovingly call the "Hana Lee Honeymoon Itinerary"), watching the sunset under blankets, and this little scene of them choosing sperm donors for their baby:

It's a nice addition, but it still doesn't explain why they couldn't have waited a few more months. Nothing has happened yet in the timeline of the story, the women are (they believe) finally safe and happy, and while Javier seems to believe that babies born to a couple that consists of two women pop out of nowhere, I'm hoping the denizens of their duchy will have at least a little more common sense (this is Cordonia, so "hope" is the operative word).

- Drake: Langorous, relaxed and contented. Stargazing on the beach (I wonder whether this was a nod to the meteor shower scene in Book 1), whiskey on a patio/balcony/whatever in the afternoon, and eating roasted pork by the fire. Plenty of sex but also lots of outdoors, which means lots of the stuff Drake enjoys doing.

• Aaaaaand it's time for sexy scene 2! The couple are now relaxing in bed on the last day of their honeymoon, and the LI proposes a momento in the form of a sensual photoshoot (which comes with artwork of the LI in their underwear, posing for the MC) The male LIs pose with their hands at the back of their heads, smirking at the camera, while Hana strikes a coy pose, leaning against her hand. It's a quick, fun scene that's supposed to squeeze as much alone-time out of the couple as possible, because from here on the focus may shift to other things. Basically this chapter is meant to be one giant (but largely safe for readers) smutfest. I like the artwork - it's different and I guess meant to be a little more realistic than the usual full-page art in the books (like the engagement and wedding photos with your LIs last book), which is why I think it takes a little getting used to. I know it took me some time!

• Maxwell got an underwear upgrade too!

• We've now come to the end of our honeymoon, our bags packed and ready for our return to Cordonia. The chapter ends with us seeing a "familiar face", who could either be Liam (if you married someone else, and he doesn't show any expression) or an unspecified person (if you married Liam, and he looks ultra happy). Now that could either be related to some paparazzi-related stuff, if the flash of light was paparazzi-related, or it could be a fake-out and he's actually brought along the rest of the gang to surprise you. Idk and I don't want to speculate too much on this, mostly because something more interesting caught my eye.

• So that's it for my thoughts on the scenes themselves! On to the "general thoughts" section.

• General Thoughts and Potential Theories:

- As a first chapter for a new series that is still tied to an older one, it worked. It mirrors the light feel and sensibility of TRR's very first chapter, in that both chapters build an illusion of a fairytale-like place, with hints of the darkness within emerging the next chapter onwards (in this series though - since we're already familiar with Cordonia - the darkness is lightly hinted at this chapter itself). In a lot of ways I think we're going to see a lot of parallels between TRR and this new series.

- Unfortunately, one of those similarities also includes the imbalance in the writing for the LIs. Specifically with Maxwell and Hana. It's the most glaring in the dinner scene, which builds for us the premise on which this entire book stands (the topic of pregnancy). There are ways you could have them make the jump from nervous about having kids to excited, if you tried - there are elements in their storyline that could have helped us understand their urgency.

- I played Liam's route first, and was happy overall with it but I still have my misgivings. The good in terms of Liam's story is that he gets importance because the story is also about him and his country, where we are staying. He gives us some very important details in his route, and personally I like that his role as Guide To The Intricacies And Nuances of Cordonian Society still exists...but you can't deny that there were things in his storyline which should have been addressed and never were. I hope those are addressed this book. If they do the same this time around, it will only be to their detriment.

- Also, I find it highly ironic that Drake is the one to mention Savannah and Bartie when it was MAXWELL who was more involved in helping her with the child. Sure, he was - as he confessed in that Valtoria scene - more the "fun uncle" type, but he was still pretty heavily involved. Still keeping track of what Savannah needed and what Bartie would want. In his own final Book 3 scene, Maxwell is shown having an amazing rapport with little Bartie, playing peekaboo with his nose. I can barely count scenes involving Drake and Bartie with the fingers of one hand. Why couldn't Maxwell reference that last moment in Book 3, drawing up some inspirational moment from it? Like spending more and more time with Bartie changed the way he felt about kids? Or maybe that Savannah or Bertrand said something regarding the joy children bring to him. Anything that gives us some idea of when this shift happened.

Maxwell may have been new last book. It may have been a struggle to know what to do with him last book. But that isn't the case right now. By now they should have settled in their writing of him and figured out ways to make his story make sense? To give him more depth rather than simply reducing the man to the court jester? Maxwell's story was supposed to be about him growing, the scene in Valtoria was supposed to be about wanting to be a good father for his future children but fearing he might fail...yet the writers have the same man say the exact opposite. Maxwell's family history was thrown away for no good reason last book, and was replaced by Savannah drama. There was more space given to Savannah's love story with Bertrand (which didn't NEED the entire book to gain fruition) and Drake (optionally) enjoying humiliating Bertrand. That time, energy and effort could have gone in building up Maxwell, getting an insight into what happened to the Beaumonts that they became so poor...but no. The only Beaumont that mattered seems to be Savannah (and we know exactly why). And going by the fact that they're going to force an entire wedding storyline involving Bertrand and Savannah down our throats, that still seems to be the case.

- Hana's is even more worrying considering that it was poles apart from the rest of the playthroughs and therefore SHOULD have had more thought. Yes Hana loves the idea of being a mother. Yes Hana loves children and has a nurturing nature. But the urgency is still the same as the others' in her playthrough, and it made absolutely no sense. There was a clear dissonance between their current situation and the rush these two were in.

Hana's deserved at least some more time in her dinner scene. Maybe one where she could speak about growing up an only child, with no companions and not even toys. She could explain the loneliness involved in having a small family with parents who gave her more duties than affection, and then speak about giving her kid a better childhood. There isn't even any discussion about which of them should be the person carrying (we know it will be the MC, but why it has to be her in their case is anyone's guess).

What the team have done here is give Hana the bare minimum, after an entire two books of giving her even less than that. I know I'll probably be judged for thinking negatively rather than being cautiously optimistic, but the fact is that the moment this team feels they can get away with tossing scraps or less than that, they can and will do it. It's not stopped them before: not from botching up Hana's storyline, not from giving Hana fans a reception full of goof-ups and shoddy writing, not from pairing her with her bully. Perhaps last year I would have been happy and grateful to see Hana and the MC calling each other "my wife". This time...I refuse to settle for just mere scraps. If you can give thought and care to Liam and Drake's storylines, you'd better be able to do the same for Hana and Maxwell, otherwise what's the point of reviving this book? What's the point of using Hana specifically in two of your ads as bait for your lesbian/bi/wlw fans?? Might as well let the entire series rot in the trash where it belongs in that case.

- I've heard theories about our child becoming heir to the throne, thanks to a possible future arc that may make Liam unable to have children. I personally hate this possible plot line for two reasons:

1. As it is the MC gets more importance than she deserves, whether or not she actually puts in the work. She becomes a front-runner during the social season even if she fails. She becomes a Duchess even if she lacks even the most basic skills, while Hana who has done way more than she ever had for the country gets nothing, not even a needle-point's worth of land. She becomes Champion of the Realm even if she is literal garbage throughout that book, when that title could have easily gone to Olivia or Hana instead if she didn't earn enough to get it. And now to have her kid be made an heir to the throne? For no good reason? Get outta here.

2. Forcing Liam into yet another storyline that is tragic and painful (and I'm pretty sure the writers will find yet another excuse to write a thesis on Drake Walker in the time they could be using to let Liam actually break down, or vent. If they couldn't be bothered to explore the man's feelings when his own father died, do you really think they will bother with him in this??) on top of whatever else he's had to experience so far? At this point I can do with less of that. I'm honestly sick of storylines that put Liam in very uncomfortable, painful situations with very little space for him to air out his grief. Give the man a fucking break. Let him have some breathing space to rule his goddamned kingdom, get him a fantastic therapist and get him better friends while he's at it. Pushing him into yet another messed-up situation when you've barely even scratched the surface with what his experiences have done to him, is really just drama for the sake of drama, nothing else.

- Nonetheless, since this is about a pregnancy and a future heir, I believe there will be plenty talk about succession, and about the importance given to fertility and children in Cordonian society. But as with the social season in Book 1, the engagement tour in Book 2, and the wedding + Unity Tour in Book 3, I believe the pregnancy itself is a frame story. The kind of story that justifies the glitz, the glitter, and the glamorous events...that can serve as a temporary gloss to cover the conflicts within. All while the inner stories reveals those conflicts, layer by layer (again, if it's done right. Book 3 is a good example of a great premise ruined by bad writing. I sincerely hope this book does not go in that direction).

- Remember those screenshots I put up in that dinner scene from Liam's route? About Cordonia's tensions with its neighbouring countries, and how the country may be viewed as vulnerable? I think that's where the actual theme of the story lies.

Books 1 and 2 mostly revolved around the illusion of Cordonia - the fairytale kingdom - before the MC herself is confronted with the tensions brewing within. Book 3 was about strengthening Cordonia through resolution of internal conflict. It was about learning about the intricacies of the country, its most powerful duchies, their histories and identities, Cordonia's messy, complicated history - to tackle the problems that lay within.

I feel like Book 4 would be taking a natural progression from resolving internal conflict to finally standing united as a nation against outside forces. Constantine - in his conversation with the MC in Shanghai - hints not only at groups within Cordonia that wanted to destroy the monarchy, but also foreign powers ("suffice to say there are those who envy Cordonia's prosperity...". Not the royal family's - but "Cordonia's").

Keeping a united front and showcasing strength through pride in the country - ergo 'patriotism', or perhaps 'national integration' since Cordonia is home to many different cultures and geographical locations (I originally wrote 'nationalism here, but now realize there may be negative connotations attached to that word in today's times: thanks @musicallisto!) is often viewed as an asset against alien forces. The MC is now a part of the monarchy/nobility, and will be irrevocably tied to the country's future - so it makes sense that she will now dig into the deepest and most intimate parts of Cordonia's history, and go several steps further in helping to unite the nation.

- Why do I theorize 'patriotism' or 'national integration' as being a theme? There are several reasons for this:

The Unresolved Storylines: We still have a ways to go in understanding Cordonian history. We don't know which other forces were involved in previous assassinations, and we don't have a clue what happened to Liam's mother. All we do know is that other people and groups that we have probably not even seen yet, may have been involved. Francesco (who also knew Liam's mother) and Xinghai, the only foreign delegates/visitors that we got to network with in Book 2, have minimal roles so far but SEEM to have had some influence when they were introduced earlier. Francesco particularly could have some sort of role to play, given what we were told about him in Book 2. Now would be a good time to explore why he needed contacts with these people (other than the fact that Xinghai is Hana's dad). It's possible that nothing will happen and we may not even see these two, or exchange any important information, but I'd still hope that there is some importance to their appearances in Book 2.

The Connections We Made In The Engagement Tour: Meeting Francesco in Capri was related to getting access to EU markets for Cordonian products. The engagement tour itself revolved around grabbing international attention towards Cordonian problems - one of which was the tsunami that hit Portavira, which we learn more about in Book 3. There is a possibility that these threads may be picked up in the future.

Both the above points hint at possible threats, or allies. At this point we can't exactly determine who is friend and who is foe, but it is clear that neighbouring countries - and indeed countries we have associated with in the past - will play a pretty big role in the way we view Cordonia, and in the way we direct the narrative of this country.

The Artwork: I love this part of my theory because it is the most based on actual evidence rather than guesswork. The idea of a nation depends as much on items of familiarity and symbols, as it does on history. It's why countries have national animals, anthems, fruits. Why art depicting national and local legends can often be considered almost sacred. The book has barely even begun yet, and already it is FILLED with all kinds of things symbolic to Cordonia.

Let's first take a peek at the cover art:

Now let's ignore Liam's and Drake's (busted) faces in this cover and focus on what the three are holding.

The MC holds a rattle in her hand, and the jewel within the rattle looks similar to a ruby, which has been associated more than once with apples in the story (Cordonia's most valued variety of apple is the Cordonian Ruby, Liam's wedding gift to the MC is a ruby in the shape of an apple. The same rattle shows up in the second cover [on the left] as well. It's a stretch, I know, but I've got better evidence. Stick with me).

Liam holds a onesie with a crown design on the front - and we know that "for crown and country" is a popular phrase, especially for toasts, in Cordonia. Drake holds out a toy lion: the lion is the national animal, and holds a place of pride in the national Coat-of-Arms. The throne on which the MC herself sits, is blue and gold - both considered national colours. That's at least 4 symbols related to Cordonia vying for our attention on the same cover!

I mean, even Book 3 had just two major symbols - the apple (related to Cordonia) and the phoenix gown (related to Valtoria) - featuring on its cover.

The biggest proof to me, however, is not the cover, but the loading page. To be more precise - what is written above that loading page. A number of Choices books (BB, for instance) write little factoids about the world they are building above the loading bar, which players can read while they're waiting for the chapter to load. This wasn't a common practice with TRR, but they've definitely started it now! Some of the commentary is usual stuff - about gaining advantages through outfits, welcoming you back to Cordonia, etc...but THIS TIME there are tidbits of information given to us as well. And 80% of those involve apples!

Here are a few I managed to catch. One fact on the importance of apples in Cordonian culture, two specifically on the Cordonian Ruby itself including a rare recipe, and two old proverbs (this isn't the only time we've heard apple-related proverbs in the books - in Book 3 for instance, Bertrand refers to their trip to Fydelia as 'slicing two apples with one knife'). Proverbs in general often give us an idea of what people within a region hold up as important, as so connected to their life experiences that they can use those familiar objects as motifs for things that they see in daily life (eg. proverbs in my home state, Kerala, often refer to things/animals we find locally: jasmines, coconuts, jackfruit, dogs, elephants).

The fact that the apple features so often and with such emphasis in the loading page itself - and we have already seen what this simple fruit means to Cordonia - indicates to me that this national symbol - and the idea of the nation itself - will be of great importance. Not only will we be exploring foreign relations, IMO, but we'll also be learning how to build a national narrative that will benefit and strengthen Cordonia.

What's also interesting is that the apple symbolizes fertility to the Cordonian people as well - the apple cutting ceremony during a wedding (as explained by Regina to Leo's fiancée in RoE) is "a symbol of the fruit the tree will bear - you being the tree, of course", and there are chances that the fruit may feature often within the context of pregnancy/having children as well.

• That's all for now, guys. I hope to write more and theorize more as the chapters progress! Until then, I hope you enjoy this one, and I'd love to hear what you have to say.

• I did the Hana screenshots for this chapter, since the first chapter allows me to play repeatedly within losing keys, but I won't be able to do so from Chapter 2 onwards. If there are any Hana fans out there who keep screenshots of scenes in their route and are interested in sharing, I'd love to hear from you and will definitely credit you for the screenshots I put up!

• If you'd like to be tagged in future QTs, please let me know! Tagging @nikkisha16 for now since she asked xD

• Until Saturday, folks!

#long post #trh quick thoughts #the royal heir #trh qts #king liam #liam x mc #hana lee #hana x mc #maxwell beaumont #maxwell x mc #drake walker #drake x mc

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pokemon-au · 4 years

Text

first encounters

Nolan:

Sabre / Litten: An alley stray kid!Nolan befriended before rescuing him one day from drowning in a canal. Follows him like a little shadow ever since.

Princess / Skitty: Nolan adores Skitties and always wanted one. So he saved up and bought her from a specialised Skitty breeder after being on a long waiting list. He also wanted a playmate for Sabre (”This is your sister”). However his two cats bicker often.

Lee / Elekid-Electabuzz: A wild chance encounter.

Boog / Cubchoo-Beartic: Followed after (intensely stalked) Nolan throughout his journey despite Nolan's protest and eventually caught himself with a Quick ball Nolan was saving up.

Lazarus / Numel-Camerupt: He camped out for Lazarus because he thinks Numels are so! freakin! awesome! Boog causes an accidental landslide that traps a Numel and Nolan stays behind for several days, encouraging it to break free.

Baz / Wartortle-Blastoise: He chanced upon it in the wild where it had a Naruto Rasengan/Chidori (Aura Sphere vs Electro Ball) battle with Lee.

Zion:

Don / Shiftry*: He lived in the tree kid!Zion would often read under as a Seedot. He was very intrigued by Zion’s books and would try to follow after him to look at the pages. Despite being initially annoyed by his persistence, Zion took a liking to him and they eventually struck up a friendly companionship. When Don was attacked by a horde of bird-Pokémon, Zion took him in and nursed him back to health and they’ve been together ever since.

Aoi / Riolu: Aoi and Naga were street urchins who were drawn to Zion's garden and started stealing his produce to fill their empty bellies. They got caught by Zion's Nuzleaf (then) and Zion punished them. ...but he also fed them and cleaned them. Them living with him is essentially him going "Well, I guess you can stay until we find you a new home, but until then, make yourself useful" They've gotten really comfortable at Zion's.

Naga / Mienfoo: Like Aoi, they raided and ruined Zion’s garden and were tasked with repairing the damage it (as Zion did not have the heart to throw them out as they were kids). From the garden it shifted to chores around the house to earn their keep. Till they find “new trainers”, they had to do their part and Zion felt like he had to set them straight, on the right path.

Ueki / Bonsly-Sudowoodo: Zion found it hiding in his garden one day eating his crops. He tried to chase it off and when he finally cornered it, it started bawling (Fake Tears). This caught him off guard and he faltered. The Bonsly saw an opening and slipped past Zion, but not before throwing a move at him and sticking its tongue out, and then running away. The Bonsly returned in the days of the following week and caused a lot of trouble for Zion until he finally captured it. It took forever because it was devious and clever and it wasn’t afraid to fight back. They even set up traps for it. Aoi and Naga were the main ones who chased after it while Don supervised (it’s surprisingly agile) and it had a lot of fun making them scramble around. It used the Fake Tears trick on Zion again but he wasn't fazed. In fact, he gave it an angry stern lecture and it sulked.

Hagame / Turtwig: The Turtwig lives in his garden and spends most of her time sleeping amongst Zion's crops. He found that she had wandered in and made a home for herself and he was really afraid she’d eat and damage his crops. But he found out that she didn't and actually made his plants healthier so he just left her alone (also mainly because he failed to drive her out) She was always sleeping and once she was asleep, she wouldn't wake up and she was very heavy - so he got Aoi and Naga to lift and carry her out of the garden, left her outside and they shut the gates next day she was back at the same place so this continued on for a while until Zion kinda gave up since she wasn't really being a nuisance. She is also a very clean Pokemon. Zion appreciates that. He feeds and waters her regularly like another one of his plants. She also produces oxygen which boosts health and in turn she boosted the health of his crops xD She’s a grass type Pokemon so idk I guess she was good for the plants too She sleeps a lot and doesn't really bother anyone. Sometimes Zion takes the time out to polish her shell.

Fūrin / Chimecho: Inherited from his great-grandparents together with the house as a guardian.

Day:

Kirby / Sylveon: Picked out from a litter of Eevees given away in school a local Eevee breeder (same as Jacob)

Mickey / Marill-Azumarill: He got his Azurill from a trip to the beach. He befriended it and it followed him back

Pinkie / Cleffa-Clefairy-Clefable: Appeared during the night of a meteor shower. While everyone else was out watching the meteor shower, she snuck into Day’s house to steal but got stuck. She literally broke in. Pinkie loves Minior-shaped candies

Benny / Togepi-Togetic: Given to Day as an egg by his god-aunt, Noella as a Christmas gift (in conjunction with Jacob’s Mimi)

Aeriel:

Pixie / Cutiefly-Ribombee: Aeriel’s childhood pokemon.

Mochi / Pikachu: He was found entangled and stuck wires and overcharged after a power outage and was very ill with electrical overcharging. Day’s mum nursed it back to health. Because they usually release Pokémon they’ve nursed back to health, Day pleaded for his mum to keep the Pikachu. He now stays as their family pet.

[need to edit and figure out how they met and how to summarise things......but don’t have the motivation or time....but i plan to finish it...wendie]

#nolan team #nolan info #zion team #zion info #day info #day team #aeriel team

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thinkaboutdobrik · 6 years

Text

Hard To Get → David Dobrik

requested by anonymous

plot: the reader is being hard to get and david tried his best to impress her.

«y/n, would you go on a date with david?» zane asked you, looking at you from the couch.

you gave him a shrug from the kitchen counter. «no, he wouldn't have time for dates.» you laughed before continuing with whatever you were doing in the kitchen.

you and the guys were having a slow night at david’s house. they had just finished editing whilst you had kept them company. the guys would crack jokes here and there and somehow the conversation had led to a debate on whether or not david was dateable, considering his busy schedule and lack of free time.

david’s hand landed over his heart, pretending to be deeply offended as he scoffed. «yea, i would!» he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air after finally joining your discussion, taking his attention away from his phone and onto you.

heath entered the room. «no, she's actually right. you're always busy doing something.» he claimed as he sat down in the couch next to zane.

david scoffed once again, this time rolling his eyes as well. «guys, i can make plenty of time to do other things.» he assured everyone, trying his best to convince everyone that filming and editing wasn’t always his main priority.

after finishing what you were doing in the kitchen, you crashed onto the couch next to the guys. crossing your legs and your arms you looked in david’s direction who was laying on the bean bag, under a big blanket with his hood pulled tight around his face.

«if i'm gonna date someone they need to have time for me. like, i need to be one of their top priorities, and i just don't see that with you, david.» you admitted, using your hands to talk and accentuate a few of the words.

zane turned in the couch, a big grin forming on his face in result of your comments. «ooh, burn!» he laughed.

«plus, you also don't know how to dress nicely. baby, you can't be going on dates in sweatpants and t-shirts if you wanna get the ladies.» heath added, pouting his lips as he spoke, serving a slight attitude as his hand fell onto his hip.

«exactly!» you agreed.

david shook his head in disbelief as to what the three of you had just said. he rolled his eyes before unlocking his phone again, putting the attention back to his phone.

lately david had been acting differently around you. nothing bad, but it seemed like he was more comfortable around you. he’d always give you small compliments here and there, and he seemed to be wanting to spend more time with you. the girls in your friend group all claimed he had a ‘thing’ for you, but you shrugged it off. you could never imagine david have time for a girlfriend, let alone a single hook up, so you didn’t pay it too much attention.

«and you're always either filming or editing. the only times you take care of yourself is when you post mate food literally to your doorstep.» you mocked.

david removed the blanket from his lap and turned towards the three of you. «what- when did this turn into a 'roast david' session?» he half heartedly laughed.

«i'm sorry, dave. if you want to take me on a date you're gonna have to really impress me.» you replied before getting up from the couch and heading to the hallway to put on your shoes. «uber’s here. see you later!» you waved at the guys.

after finally getting home to spend the rest of the night in bed, your phone lit up from the desk drawing your attention to it. you let out a small groan as you got up from the bed that you had just crashed onto, and unlocked your phone only to see an unread text message from david.

david: hey what are u doing tomorrow night

y/n: uhm nothing why?

david: wanna come over around 7ish and keep me company while i edit wednesday's vid?

y/n: suree

david: see you then ;)

the whole day went by pretty quickly, and it was already getting close to 7pm. you had been running plenty of arrends the entire day, and when you finally got home late in the afternoon you headed straight for the shower.

after getting out of the steamy, hot and relaxing shower you proceeded to do the usual: skin care routine, put on some clothes, do your make up and fix your hair.

wearing nothing but some comfy sweatpants and a hoodie, you proceeded to order an uber.

the thing about hanging out around david at night time, and especially on editing nights, when it was just the two of you was that you'd be able to just chill out. he'd be buried deep into his laptop, most likely covered by a big hoodie with the hood pulled tight to his face, which often resulted in you sitting on the other side of the couch scrolling through instagram and twitter.

getting out of the uber you headed for david's door. a confused look snuck up on your face as you got closer to the door. dark rooms, no sight of any movement coming from the inside - maybe he forgot you were coming over?

you knocked lightly on the door as you peeked through the curtains hanging above the door. a few seconds later, the door finally unlocked.

«hey, I- » you greeted before inturrupting yourself as you laid your eyes on the brown haired man standing before you.

«woah, what are you up to? are you filming? » you asked, confusion in your tone as you looked david up and down.

his soft and fluffy hair was lightly slicked back. he was wearing a nice, dark grey suit and some really nice, shiney, probably brand new, shoes to go with.

he shook his head as he adjusted his blazer. «what makes you think i'm filming?» he joked causing you to roll your eyes at him.

«what's all this?» you asked, waving your hand around and pointing at the unusual sight.

«just to show you i own more clothing than just sweatpants and hoodies.» he laughed.

he reached out his hand for you to grab it as he gave you a smile. «come, i wanna show you something.»

you analyzed his outfit and glanced over his shoulder to look into the livingroom.

nothing. pure darkness. all the lights were off and it didn't seem like anything was going on. your eyes darted to david's free hand, noticing he didn't carry his camera around, which he usually did.

«david, what are you up to-» you started, grabbing his hand hesitantly as he guided you inside.

«shh, just follow me. what are you, scared?» he mocked feeling your loose grip on his hand.

«the only time i get scared around you is when you're pointing a flamethrower to my face... that and snakes.» you laughed, before getting guided further into his house.

passing by the kitchen, you were guided through the livingroom and over to the door to the backyard. you peeked through the windows, trying to catch a glance of what david was going to show you, but your view was quickly blocked by david taking a step to the side to stand right in front of you.

david let out a big sigh before clearing his throat. «this is just something i put together, all by my self. it took hours of planning but i made it.» he smiled before turning to the door to hold it open for you as you carefully took a step forward, entering his backyard.

«wha- where is everybody? what is this? what are you up to, dobrik?» you asked in confusion as you looked around.

once you entered his backyard your eyes immediately landed on the small table set for two next to the lit up firepit. your eyes quickly darted over to the mariachi band that slowly started playing their instruments.

you looked at david, with your eyes wide as ever, a big smile on your face. «is this for me?»

david smiled widely as he placed his hand on the small of your back and guided you forward. he pulled out the chair in front of you, motioning for you to sit down.

«do you like it?» he asked you as he sat down on the chair across from you.

you nodded and smiled, still taken aback by all of your surroundings. «i even cooked us pasta, look!» he announced before lifting up the lid to the big plate in the middle of the table.

you squinted your eyes at him as you leaned back in your chair. «that looks oddly familiar..»

«fine, it's olive garden,» he chuckled as he ran a hand through his slicked back hair. «but i went out and bought it myself! infact, i did all of this myself.» he continued, pointing at the table and the mariachi band.

you gave him a quick smirk as you looked at him. «alright, dobrik. what's the catch?» you chuckled as you crossed your legs under the table.

«no catch. you said i'd never have time for dates, so..» he started, a smile sneaking up on the corners of his lips. «i cancelled all my plans today, made sure i had plenty of time, i even bought a suit-» he continued, continuisly talking with his hands.

«just to prove a point? you didn't have to do all that,» you tilted your head as you looked in his direction.

«no, I-» he sighed. «the point here is that you're so freakin' hard to get, and i did my very best to impress you, which i hope i did, because i want to date you, alright?» he rambled on, running out of breath as he eagerly spoke.

you smiled before biting your bottom lip and placing your palm on top of david's hand. «fine,» you giggled.

he looked at you in confusion, squinting his eyes at your response. «fine, what?»

«fine, i'll go on a date with you.» you smiled as a small laugh escaped your mouth.

david's eyes lit up as he straightened his back, a big and wide smile appearing on his face. «really?»

you nodded in response, giving him a quick wink as you playfully kicked his leg under the table.

#david dobrik #david dobrik imagine #david dobrik fluff #david dobrik blurb #david dobrik oneshot #david dobrik fic #david dobrik fiction #david dobrik fan fic #david dobrik fan fiction

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steve0discusses · 5 years

Text

Yugioh S4 Ep 15: Yami Joins the Bay Area Tribe By Throwing a Riot About Sports on Caltrain

So as you’ve probably guessed because of my lack of posts--I got kinda busy with life stuff and just got hit with this really nasty flu at the same time. Yes, I am in a Coronavirus-affected area but no, I don’t have it and I am not dying (although I did do the right thing and quarantined myself anyway, much like a whole lot of the Bay who are just...working from home. Traffic’s been great.) It’s just that every January/February I tend to fall apart and get the flu so bad I lose my voice for 5 days. This year was 6 days. I just catch the flu a lot, but at least I get my shots so it’s not as bad as it would have been.

So, I took a hell ton of Nyquil and Dayquil and while I’m...functional...I don’t know if any of this make sense. So forgive my rambling. I usually ramble, today I’ll be like...hella rambling. About TRAINS.

So anyway, Lets talk about Yugioh.

Lets board a Californian train!

Yugioh has decided that out of every vehicle they’ve devoted episodes to--they haven’t done trains yet, so it’s train time. Train time...in America...which is not a great place for trains. Like I never really think about it but...people take the freakin Greyhound over trains. Which is wild, guys, the Greyhound is...it’s a state of mind. We ignore trains so much.

It’s just really funny that they left Japan to go to America to ride a train when it’s like...the show takes place...in Japan. The land of wonderful trains. But wtv, they wanted ye Old Western experience.

Anyway, Rebecca really wanted to go on the train with them, but everyone pretty much decided that children were no longer safe on this trip with Yugi and co. The fact that Yugi and co are also children is something I guess we decided to push under the rug. I mean Duke Devlin has a freakin job and a work Visa at 17 so...that’s adult enough, right?

(*in a very Roaring Camp Railroad Commercial voice, and over the dulcet sounds of a banjo* More TRAINS under the cut!)

And then Arthur decided to just really grill it into Yami for some reason.

I think it was mostly to act as a recap but damn, Arthur Hawkins just really seems to hate Yami for killing Yugi. Anyway, lets get a good look at our train.

Surprisingly for this show, they decided not to put us on the Roaring Camp Railroad through the Santa Cruz Mountains, instead, they put us on an actual legit commuter train, and it blew my mind because...it’s the CALTRAIN.

That’s my train! What’s my Caltrain doing in Yugioh!?!?

They even got the paint job right! This is absolutely the Caltrain!

We never update this train. So yes, it still looks like this over 10 years later. It’s very underfunded.

+++THIS IS TRAIN FACTS FEEL FREE TO SKIP TRAIN FACTS+++++

So the Caltrain was originally privately owned tracks--which is how they are really nicely laid out--a private company bought everything/pushed out the old owners before the place got developed. When trains went under, the tracks were purchased by the State and then given to Amtrack to manage. So, Caltrain is strictly property of the State Government but still run by the Federal Government at the same time. Don’t ask me how it works, I don’t know, I just pay my taxes and it goes vroom.

We’ve wanted to extend the Caltrain down to Southern California for a very long time, but because of corruption and a lot of people in politics refusing to expand the Bay out of the fear of maybe dropping our housing prices to reasonable limits, and the fear of making it way too feasible to get more children to Disneyland, the track has stayed roughly the same length for over 40 years.

Overall, It’s less drive time than this duel that takes up this next arc, I’m pretty sure. I’m gonna guess that the duel will be 3 episodes long because c’mon. This is Yugioh. It’s always 3 episodes long, like a Nintendo boss.

Anyway, all these train facts are things that are probably so weird and foreign to places that have ample trains--but in America, we just don’t have a strong train lobby compared to our auto lobby. So, I’m sure that people in Japan making this series thought “Oh they’re on a train--it can just go forever because why wouldn’t it be long? Aren’t all American trains connected?” but uh...it’s a short train. Like we’re talking like a few hours max, and that’s only if they’re starting from Gilroy.

I will say that BART is longer and has multiple tracks, so you would think they’d just take BART instead. But, it goes under the ocean for part of it, and we’ll get to why that would have been a very big problem in this episode later. Also, BART is very gross and no one wants to animate that outside of a horror movie.

But at least they didn’t go way out of left field and take the SF trolley. The Caltrain does actually go pretty fast. It...kind of makes sense. They did actual research into a real thing that we do have.

++++END RANT ABOUT THIS TRAIN AND HOW NONE OF THIS EPISODE MAKES SENSE BUT IT’S YUGIOH SO I WILL IGNORE THAT++++

And youknow...there’s something just so adorable about seeing desert mesas reflected in the window of the Caltrain. It’s just delightful. Because, in reality the entire stretch of the Caltrain is very densely suburban/urban, and the only place where it isn’t surrounded by city is when it’s flanked by the sea.

But yeah, just put mesas on it!

*freakin curtains*

Joey and Tristan hit the “dining car,” which I don’t think is a thing in any form of commuter train. These trains are for trips the length of about 1 extensive Puzzles and Dragons session on your phone, give or take.

(And man, speaking of, the Yugioh PAD collab was so good, guys. Ah man. Been wrecking like every dungeon in multiplayer ever since Bro and I both got a Yugi to put as our leader. He’s basically one of the best leaders in the game right now and I feel like people at PAD were huge Yugioh fans because they were like “what if we made...basically every Yugioh pull into a freakin beast that broke every dungeon in the game?”)

I can’t believe Joey Wheeler went thousands of miles from his homeland and was like “I better drink an American soda” and chose Orange. I mean he might be drinking an Arizona Tea, but I’m pretty sure he thought “ah, Kenan and Kel, right?” and just nabbed the nastiest soda that exists outside of grape.

I feel like I can still taste the orange soda I drank over 20 years ago. It is terrible. It is SO orange. Gross. But at the same time...good? I really don't know with Orange Soda. It’s probably gross.

Meanwhile, Tea decides it’s an appropriate time for Yami to work on his social skills. Now. When he’s visibly grieving after being berated by his Basically-Step-Grandfather and Rebecca.

And then we find out something I’ve never realized before, and it’s that Tea is really bad at social cues. Like maybe even worse than Yami. Like, I dunno how Pharaoh could look more like an angry cat/hedgehog but Tea was not picking up on it.

And y’all I’m not making that up, these are the topics Tea actually came up with for the guy who just saw his best friend die/was very implicit in said murder. Beaches and Bathing Suits.

She got over Yugi being dead like immediately.

Of course, this episode is kind of weird because, much like this show has done so many times already, these guys are still struggling to truly understand that Yugi is two people in one body. Tea sort of comes to this realization as if she...forgot that she has stepped inside his actual head and seen this for herself.

Or maybe it’s denial, but I’m thinking maybe the show did this for the new people coming to the show, to explain a rather complicated thing that took 3 seasons to cement in our minds. But still, it makes Tea seem very forgetful over a guy she should sort of be dating I guess.

Anyway it’s their first real fight. Kind of. I mean it’s hard to tell if anyone on this show is dating, and it’s equally hard to tell if they are fighting, too.

Well, first real fight if you don’t count Zero when Yugi tried to make out with Miho over a card duel, but I think we’re all doing our best to forget that ever happened. Yugi especially.

Or I guess that time she strangled him nearly to death in the nurse’s office when Shadi took over his body. That counts as a fight, right?

Ah. Now we’re on Caltrain.

Don’t take it the wrong way, Caltrain is actually our higher end safe train, compared to our other transit, BART, which will always sit you next to a weirdo, guaranteed. Caltrain--you can take a good nap on Caltrain. BART...you will never feel comfortable enough to take a nap on BART (also because there’s not enough seating room anymore)

But a lot of people who take the train are just freakin WEIRD. I used to take the Caltrain with my older brother (different bro than the bro of this blog, this is my chaotic neutral bro) because we both worked near the same place in downtown SF, and he would always take with him--I kid you not--a 2 liter bottle of Mountain Lightning for a snack.

For those not in the States, Mountain Lightning is the offbrand Walmart version of Mountain Dew. Yes. I know what I said. It seems dumbfounding as Mountain Dew is already an off brand of Sprite--the true lemon/lemon lime--but indeed, like Inception, you can always go deeper, and if there is a soda so bewildering and random, my older brother will be ON IT.

Anyways, my older bro is a train weirdo, so not only does he prefer Mountain Lightning to Mountain Dew, he would take out a 2 liter from his backpack, tilt back his head, and just chug the whole thing straight from the huge ass bottle in front of God and everyone on that train.

He’d polish it off completely on the ride there and the ride back, because my older brother has this weird medical problem where he can’t really feel pain and he has an insane metabolism and never gained weight until he was like 32, so he can just...chug as much soda as he freakin wants. So, at some point of the trip he would have to use the very tiny bathroom, and it would be very urgent, and he’d just scramble over me to get to the aisle and then kind of skip and hop all the way there on the rush hour train that was completely full of people.

Like, most people don’t even know that Caltrain has a bathroom--well now you know, and for several years there, it was just always taken by my brother violently pissing. That was us (well...him). My apologies.

In case your curious, now my bro has hardcore acid reflux, and all he needs to do is stop drinking so much damn soda, but it’s been very hard for him, so he has cut back to “diet soda”. This is still a lot of soda and it still causes acid reflux. His doctor is working on him.

And yes, Diet Mountain Lightning exists. That’s just so many steps removed from Sprite at this point.

Anyways, enough waxing long about train memories, lets get back to the show, because it’s not this season of Yugioh until there’s a problem with the commute.

Unrelated to Pharaoh punching the walls, everyone has “disappeared.”

My bro looked up the Wiki that says there's “no explanation for the missing train passengers” but we all know what that really means on this show, right?

So, how many people fit on Caltrain?

There’s just NO WAY they’re alive anymore, right? Like Yugioh went and killed 756 Bay Area passengers because...it’s a filler season!

I really feel like there’s just no way Seto or Bakura will ever catch up to Darts’ death count at this rate.

After this, we have ourselves this fun train-jumping trope.

Pretty sure it was the superhuman opposing force of Tea jumping from the back train to the front of the train that forced the back to lose all of it’s 100+ mph momentum and immediately come to a full and complete stop.

Not sure how Darts did this thing with the train separating. But he did. Or maybe it was Rex and Weevil? Either way, he somehow managed to do this well enough to strand Joey and Tristan on the other side of the line that now has no engine.

(course I say this like in 1400 AD the Bay wasn’t full of the Ohlone. this place was basically always developed because...the weather’s hella good when it’s not on fire.)

Now if you go East--southern Utah looks like this, and parts of me wonder if maybe the artists thought they were taking the train all the way to Florida. Did the English dub add “we’re taking the train to the airport” because they knew there was no one in their right mind in America who would take a California-Florida train?

I have no other explanation for why the Bay Area looks like this, than to assume that this is an alternate California where there never was a Loma Prieta Earthquake and also one where Seto and Pegasus bought out and destroyed both Steve Jobs and Bill Gates. Which makes Seto and Pegasus sound like just real true heroes, never paving any sort of way for Mark Zuckerberg to happen and unintentionally (or intentionally who knows) screw up our elections.

Or maybe that was entirely Darts? Maybe it was Darts who’s been eating up the Bay, harvesting nerd souls for the leviathan and knowing that no one will miss these Twitter developers if Twitter never happens in the first place. Especially if he’s just ghosting entire Caltrains willy nilly.

But anyway, fun fact about the Caltrain that the creators of this show didn’t know--the train is a push-pull train, so...It has an engine on both sides of the train. Joey and Tristan...still have an engine. It would have never stopped, even with Tea’s incredible backward momentum.

This is normal train stuff and is something you should always assume about a commuter train that cannot afford the time to reattach the locomotive in order to turn around, but we forget about this in TV shows basically all the time.

However, there are fantasy rules that we give to TV that we sort of don’t extend to other places. We suspend our disbelief for things like this train stopping in a track that would, realistically, have another train passing by in 10 minutes anyway. Things like rogue waves that topple over ocean liners. Or CEOs in Silicon Valley who have ass-length blue hair that is tied with one single hair precarious band.

The point at which we no longer can suspend our disbelief when it comes to TV is SO interesting to me. Because I’m fully willing to let go of the fact that Caltrain is A Push-Pull train because it’s still a fun trope although this can never really happen to you on...almost any train at all anymore. But if this were a movie? People would be losing their freakin MINDS. Look what they did after Star Wars. They lost their entire minds over force-field science that doesn’t even exist.

Like, maybe the people who made this episode really do know that San Jose is the 3rd largest city in California, and that this is a push-pull train, and that there are no mesas anywhere near the ocean of San Fransisco. Maybe they did know that--but they decided to suspend our disbelief by pushing this Wild Wild West fantasy aesthetic SO HARD so it makes it believable although this is just...so wrong. Mostly because...it’s fun TV. Not because it makes any sense, but because I would like to have fun instead of thinking.

Which is also how most romance novels work ps. But Yugioh, although *almost* understanding the key ingredient to how romance actually works, I will assume never figures that out.

I hope.

Also, Rex is here.

Bro would like to bring up that Red Eyes is not a rare card in the real world. So Rex is going out of his way to venge a card that costs...$4.50 at Target. That’s less than a meal at McDonalds. This card may have been in a Happy Meal at McDonalds.

*pictured here, the actual canyons of San Jose*

So something that’s interesting between Yami and Joey is that Yami gives in basically immediately and decides to duel Weevil, who would be very easy to just gently push off of this train. Joey on the other hand, looks down at both of his punching fists and is like “why would I bother?”

Not that it mattered, it’s just interesting that even Joey has more restraint than Yami, who has 0 restraint, apparently, when it comes to dueling cards.

Joey has more restraint that Yami, and Joey is the kid who has tried to punch out Seto Kaiba in nearly every conversation he has ever had with Seto Kaiba over the last 4 seasons.

Also, Tea is just standing on top of this train like it’s a completely normal day outside. Girl has no fear.

Wouldn’t these people be covered in bug guts? Like how are they not getting assaulted by so many flies and birds?

But because she has no decent cards the Oricalchos just kicks her out? I dunno. There’s a lot of weird physics in the next scene.

And she just grabs onto a moving train with her bare hands. I feel like Tea is just so woefully overpowered in this group but for the wrong game. I say this a lot. She’s like their One Punch Man but will never, ever know.

So anyway, that was a long time between updates and now I’m out of sync and behind on everything so...hell knows when the next update will be. Depends on the length of episode I guess? Bro really wants to get to what comes next soon though. He’ll pester me until I do it.

Now I can’t mention Mountain Lightning without sharing with you what you do with 2-4 liters of Mountain Lightning after your brother leaves and then just...doesn’t have enough room for all of his Mountain Lightning AND his baby in his car, so he just leaves it in your house.

It’s called Mountain Dew Cake <-(that is a link) and it’s actually pretty damn good.

I made this once and fed it to a British person and they were like “this is so decadent--what’s in this?” and I uh didn’t know how to respond to that other than “it’s really just Mountain Dew, I’m so sorry” and that was a lie, because it was full of Mountain Lightning.

Anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read these recaps in order.

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kryptoniteheadcanons · 5 years

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Thoughts on American Psycho

- I have no idea why but Patrick Bateman has always been one of my favourite....horror? Slasher? I dont know , but he’s my favourite protagonist thats also just really evil.

- I’ve heard about the book but haven’t actually read it, I don’t know if I ever will.

- Evelyn, why were you even with him? Like I know Patrick is really good at keeping up appearances and seeming interested in people but he is NEVER like that with her. Come on, you can do better sweetie.

- I feel really bad for “Christie” (I don’t think we ever get a different name for her) like, she’s clearly a girl thats down on her luck and this asshole just keeps dragging her into his life.

- I find it really interesting that this movie (and supposedly the book) have so much to say on the topic of angst, desire, and violence. Especially with the scene of the business cards and the how one of his co workers thinks he’s a completely different person. While we don’t get much in the way of the other guys, I have the feeling that one of the main reasons for why Patrick is the way he is comes from the fact that he doesn’t seem to have any real challenges in his life. He’s got a great, high paying job, he’s healthy and extremely fit, he has a beautiful woman that clearly cares about him and wants to marry him, he’s got a really good apartment in one of the most expensive cities in the world, et cetera.

- That being said, I don’t think Patrick has or is any of those things because he wants to. It’s either outright stated or heavily implied that he pretty much only does things so that he can fit in, insinuating that he’s always felt different to other people. By the time anyone ever actually asked him what he wanted he already knew what the socially acceptable answer was.

- “Feed me a stray cat” Implying that the ATM doesn’t eat house cats?

- It’s really clear that even in his sort of more unhinged state that Patrick doesn’t really have any thoughts of his own, given the fact that he constantly references Ed Gein and Ted Bundy. Even in his fantasies/reality about being a serial killer he’s following what he’s supposed to be doing.

- Also: Jean, sweetie, How do you not know who Ted Bundy is?

- Personally, I like to think that he didn’t actually kill Paul Allen or all those cops but most of the other shit was probably true.

- A lot of people (rightly I may add) that Patrick Bateman isn’t actually a person with Psychopathy or a disorder in that realm. I actually think that having it not fit with what he actually is was probably intentional or at least it makes sense. It’s a label that doesn’t fit that was arbitrarily thrown on him because a set of surface level and ultimately untrue signifies like everything else in his life.

- The chainsaw scene is goofy as hell.

- I know a lot of people get offended by this book and to the lesser degree the movie for it’s content of violence against women but like, yeah. It’s supposed to horrible and disgusting and make you want to get mad at every man who grabs his partners arm too roughly. Like yeah, its from Patrick’s point of view and he’s a supremely fucked up person, but you’re not supposed to like him.

- That being said, I understand if anyone feels uncomfortable with this movie or the book its based on.

- I feel like in the end the Christian Bale was definitely the right choice to play Patrick, had Leonardo Dicaprio been the one on screen I don’t think I would have bought the whole “empty shell of platitudes with no identity” thing. Leo looks like he has a personality, Christian Bale does not.

- The freakin Business card scene. Jeez.

- I know how much it sucks for someone to think you’re another person that looks similar and then start talking shit about you. Happened all the time in elementary school (ya know before I stayed inside and got so anemic that I was literally translucent)

- Never trust anyone who’s house/apartment is that clean.

- That poor homeless man...and his dog...that just sucks.

#Patrick Bateman #American Psycho #Horror #Slasher #Thoughts On #Thoughts on American Psycho #Christian Bale

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spainmozsombi · 5 years

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Hiking, cold, and other things 2.0 (11.14)

I couldn’t finish the previous post, let me try it again.

On thursday I bought the guitar, so this obviously meant that I couldn’t really concentrate on the courses for the rest of the day, bought a pack of new strings, changed them right after I got home. On thursday evening we went to a small Sisha (vizipipa for the hungarians) place with Óscar, Adele, Filip and Oliver in the (until this point I thought jewish, bit it turned out to be muslim) district called Albajcin. I’m not smoking this thing anymore the place nevertheless the place was really nice, had this muslim vibe, owner/waiter was definitely arabic, cause he was incredibly friendly. The guys bought a sisha with some peach taste, I had a Tinto. Oliver came later, also Adele had some friends visiting from the Czech Republic, they also joined us, it was a great evening! (No pics sadly, sorry)

On friday I went hiking with some new people I got to know in the past few weeks, we went to a place called Los Cahorros which is basically a canyon / gulch (see the pictures), we had a circleish hike, with some uphills and downhills, it was beatiful 14-15 km, not too much, just perfect. The place is close to Granada, 30 min by bus from the center, ticket is 3 EUR in total, would definitely recommend this to anybody who’s visiting Andalucia. I didn’t have time to go home before my evening class so I ended up going there straight from the bus wearing dirty boots and stinky clothes, I’m sure my classmates appreciated it. Since I was pretty tired, I managed to lose my powerbank somewhere at the faculty kinda of a bummer I bought it back in the US 3 years ago and it’s been doing a great job ever since... I was dead tired, went home to sleep straight after class.

On saturday I did some studying, started to write an essay cause the deadline is actually on this sunday, thought maybe it’s time to do something useful. In the evening I went to get a tea with Óscar, had a nice talk in this bar called Granada Mar (we’ve been coming here in the past few weeks, nice place, cheap drinks, good tapas, pool etc.). Long story short we ended up in a house party in an american dude called Jeremy’s place. He attended a few of the erasmusicians meetings, also played a jam thing with him on the pervious open mic, and as it turned out he invited everybody from the erasmusicians whatsapp group. Eventually we were the only ones with Óscar who eventually showed up from this group, it was a cool party anyway. We decided just to check in for an hour or so, we ended up staying a bit longer, got home around 3 am. The most interesting thing about this party is the location. Jeremy’s living in the city center. Check. On the main square where THE cathedral is. Check. On the top floor. Check. With a living room above the whole flat basically, so from the windows I could see above the rooftops, and the other direction I could see almost the roof of the cathedral. Check...It was mind blowing...I’ll try to make a pic of the place from the outside when I’ll be around there next time..The whole flat is renovated with a lot of small innovative ideas and solutions, the toilet for example was under the stairs, which led to the living room (which is above the kitchen...can you still follow me?), like Harry Potter’s bedroom at the Dursley’s place...Okay enough about the flat. The people at the party were literally from all over the world, Venezuela, US, Portugal, Germany, Romania, Bolivia, Belgium etc. ...We were just about to leave when Jeremy mentioned a jam session and well, since both Óscar and I kinda like music, we thought maybe we could stay for a bit longer..We ended up playing some old school hit songs in a crowded kitchen, Óscar/Jeremy/me/this dude named Gus from Venezuela playing the guitar and singing, Jeremy’s friend Ryan playing the cajon, and the rest of the people were also singing along! It was proper fun!

On sunday after a long internal debate I decided to go out to see how street music works around here. Plan was to go out and play somewhere around the cathedral. On the square in front of Jeremy’s place I stumbled into a british dude, Dan, who I knew from the party the previous night and from previous erasmusician meetings, he has a killer voice, and plays the violin. We played a few songs together but I didn’t want to annoy him for long so I went to look for my own place. Found a nice but windy square not far from the cathedral (it was freakin cold on sunday...brrrr). I have to admit I expected something else. I was playing there for about 40 minutes, aaand I earned about 30 cents. Not my best day. Went to Albajcin to try it again there with some help from Sara (she’s the girl from the video I uploaded from the open mic, we were playing together) and guess what, her presence made a bit of a difference. No wonder why, she can actually sing!

On monday I went climbing again with a dude called Niklas from the economics course. It was probably my worst session since I’ve started climbing (not because of him), I felt so weak, it was just awful, let’s not talk about that..

On tuesday I had a little gathering at my place, I invited Adele, Sara, Óscar and Oliver over to drink some glühwein together. I also made some “not so fancy” cake with banana in it (huge thanks to my sister for the recipe!), turned out pretty good! We played some UNO, and some other games, had a great time, I could write more about it but that wouldn’t really do justice..

On wednesday I went to Jeremy’s place again to practice a song for the open mic with him, Ryan and a french girl who’s gonna sing the song (”I’ll take care of you - Joe Bonamassa” if anybody’s interested). It’s gonna be good I think!

Today, thursday, I had the International Organizations course, with some “awesome” groupwork (Why on earth do these people here like it so much?! WHY?!), and the Magreb course, with a new professor who’s gonna be the lecturer for the rest of the semester. Of course, she also thought that some groupwork would be great (WHY?! I even took my laptop with me to finish the essay I’m supposed to hand in by sunday), but wait, there’s more. She turned on some arabic, middle eastish music, “to help us to concentrate on the task”...What the actual...Whatever, survived it somehow. Gotta admit, going to class is my least favorit thing since I actually made some friends...Ops. Okay maybe not the economic course, I kinda like that, I even accidentaly met the professor at the climbing place on monday..But the rest of the courses...Meh.

I think,

that’s all folks!

#erasmus #spain #granada

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nigelspookerjee · 6 years

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CRY💀 Thoughts💜

“Current assignment? What assignment?!” Nancy, you’re jinxing yourself already

I still remember the first time I played this game and that feeling I got when the warning comes up on the screen before everything begins. Sp00py nostalgia vibes 👻

Ned: “Hey Henry, I’m worried about you, but not worried enough to get off my ass and check on you myself. Imma send my gf instead and then bitch at her a few games later about how I never get to go anywhere.”

Not even in the house two seconds and I’m already getting attacked. Renée and Henry are the worst hostesses ever and this vacation already blows.

Nancy, you are taking a drink from someone you don’t even know; it could literally be poisonous. But go ahead, chug it anyways

Actually, if Renée just poisoned Nancy now, it would have saved her a lot of trouble in the end. Game over. Roll credits!

Henry: “maybe I should call THEM and leave THEM on hold and see how THEY like it.” Me when I’m on the phone with any customer service representative from any company ever.

Henry definitely wore eyeliner, had an emo swoop, and listened to “Ohio is for Lovers” on repeat in his angsty teenage years. But I’m not judging because honestly...same

But Henry is hot af. Broody definitely works so fucking well for him

Henry: “I come across as a little needy sometimes.” Be needy to me, Henry. Be my stage five clinger. I don’t care. Suffocate me with your broody love.

“My parents died in a car crash when I was eight.” Nancy *thinking to herself*: “damn, I didn’t even get the chance to ask him what happened to his mother.”

Henry: “no offense but are you sure you didn’t just pass out from the heat and humidity and dream that you saw this skeleton dude?” No, but in a few games further down the line, I will hallucinate seeing a ghost due to carbon monoxide poisoning. Hahahaha forshadow af.

“What was in that concoction you gave me?” You are supposed to ask this before you take a drink from a stranger, Nancy.

I. HATE. SPIDERS. ANIMATED OR NOT.

I love this game so much. The setting, the atmosphere, music, characters, storyline, puzzles, EVERYTHING.

“Finding Fish by Bill Kessler” OF COURSE BILL AND HIS NORTHERN PIKE POPS UP ONCE MORE TO HAUNT ME *eye twitches ever so slightly*

Henry: “Do you always go digging in other peoples’ fire places?” Actually, yeah. That’s how I found out some poor sap of a homeless handyman was living in the basement of the house he was renovating lol

Bruno and the Bolet family as a whole are so fascinating and I must learn everything about them

Nancy just ate a whole bunch of candy from Renée’s stash and then proceeded to vomit all over her bedroom floor. *places newspaper on top of puke and slowly backs out of the room, whispering to herself*: “I was never here...”

Ned: “it’s about time you called!” “Call again, like soon.” Um, I listen to no one or no thing, u controlling piece of cardboard

Ugh, I love Bess so much. She’s such a precious, innocent bean.

Bess is the friend who gave into peer pressure in high school: “you wanna underage drink and smoke some weed?” “Absolutely, unequivocally no.” “Come on, it’ll be fun!” “Ahhhh...okay!!”

Lamont’s Lament: Part 1

*grits teeth* these motherfucking wasps around this mother fucking tree

Henry: “Don’t worry, we got plenty of food here, beds-“ CAN I SLEEP IN UR BED? I’LL BE THE BIG SPOON!

HOTCHKISS IS BACK. SWEET AS THE SMELL OF FRIED CHICKEN!

Poor Hotchkiss has early on-set Alzheimer’s and Nancy is shaming her for it

“Sorry ‘bout your loss.” “...my loss?” Nancy, you got so annoyed that Hotchkiss couldn’t remember your name, but you can’t even remember what you said just a minute ago..pot meet kettle¿

Yeah, scurry the fuck out of my way, you hairy eight-legged motherfucker and give me my damn key before I squash you with the bottom of my shoe run away screaming like a lil bitch

Great, time to talk to creepy Gilbert and cringe as he openly hits on a girl at least 30 years younger than him. There is no May-December romance going on here, buddy.

Thanks for the gumbo, Shorty, but it does not make up for the fact you attempted to murder my best friend. And no, she has not picked those vegetables for you yet

Okay, I just laughed my ass off. After eating spicy gumbo, Bess burped out fire. I had no idea she was a dragon

I played this goddamn skeeball machine so many times. The things I do for eyeballs and Easter Eggs.

Summer, Summer, Summer. Smh. Now I ain’t sayin she a gold digger...

Henry: “I bought her a bunch of CDs to keep her occupied while I was gone.” Yeah...Summer is just gonna sit in her room, listening to the CDs you bought for her on a loop, just waiting for you to get back...

YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN SUMMER. YOU DESERVE ME.

I love Iggy so much. Dressing him up is adorable af

🎶 Bernie with a tooth so sweet. Likes marshmallows but it’s you he’d love to eat🎶 (I sang this to the tune of Brigitte’s Ballad)

Renée: “oh my, I forgot to warn you about Bernie, didn’t I?” *grins evilly* Could you contain your excitement that I was almost devoured by a crocodile until I fucking walk away?

I actually like the cemetery scavenger hunt, a lot

I love how Iggy just huffs and dips the fuck out when you dress him up as a clown. “You get nothing for this. I ain’t coming back with anything. WHO’S THE CLOWN NOW?”

Lamont’s Lament: Part 2

I seriously feel for Lamont. All he wants to do is run his curio shop in peace, and here comes this blonde twister wreaking havoc all over his night

Someone give Bess a Xanax. Poor girl is gonna have a panic attack with all of the stuff Nancy is asking her to do

Infiltrating the Jolly Rogers meeting is definitely my favorite sequence in this game

Y WOULD U CALL ME WHEN U KNOW I’M AT THE MEETING UNDERCOVER, NANCY? Thx for almost killing me, ur bff xoxo

Yup, just toss the priceless skull up to Renée like it’s a freakin’ football. You are not on the same team here, Nan.

Bernie the Immortal crocodile. Who would have thought at the beginning of the game, we’d end up with this resolution.

Hahaha of course, Lamont is out in the swamp looking for Bernie. If anyone in this game deserves the skull, it’s deff him anyways.

One of my favorite games, ever. So happy I replayed it🖤

#nancy drew #clue crew #cry #cry thoughts #nancy drew playthrough #thx for reading another long ass post #u guys are srsly gr8

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beardyallen · 6 years

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Well, that went quickly...

What day is it? I’m starting to lose track of how long I’ve been here...

Well, it’s been a week since my last post, and it seems that a lot must have happened, but honestly I feel like I’ve just been cranking through a bunch of comic books.

But I do know that Friday and Saturday involved a good deal excitement, so I guess we had might as well pick up pretty much where we left off!

Last Friday was Orientation for ICB, which meant getting all of the 35-40 instructors, 10 staff members, and the 6-8 people in charge of this program together in a room to introduce us to...basically what we’d been doing all that week. Also, aside from a couple study-abroad-undergrads and my officemate and me, everyone there had probably already heard the spiel.

It was scheduled from 5p-6p with a buffett afterwards, but a bunch of the Communications people from my floor were going out to eat (again?) afterwards, so I made plans with NR. She wanted to try this Mexican restaurant in what I’ll describe as the “international district” of Beijing. Most everything around us when we got there looked like it belonged in literally every metropolitan area in the world. Every major brand you can imagine had a store. Multiple. Too many...

But the Mexican restaurant we visited is owned and managed by a Mexican expat, apparently. He even stopped by our table to ask how the food was, and let me tell you: that quesadilla was the BOMB!!! And the margarita was pretty good (not as good as MHO’C’s, though!). By the time we finished up dinner, it was kind of late, so we wondered around the shopping center, found a bookstore. You know: the usual.

Fun fact: when a store or restaurant wants to indicate to their patrons that they are getting ready to close, they play smooth jazz and turn the lights down. Like for real. Had their not been windows open to the pavilion outside with it’s hundreds of light displays, I would have been seriously concerned when the lights in the place just went out and Kenny G popped up on the speakers.

We entertained the idea of finding the cinema nearby to see Alita Battle Angel, but during the 15 minutes that we spent wondering around in search of the complex, it seemed to elude us. Plus it was getting close to that time when the subway shuts down, and I wasn’t exactly hankering for a taxi ride this early in my stay....if at all.

The next morning, I got up early to meet back up with NR at the National Museum near the Forbidden City. Now, for the most part, the stairs I get don’t bother me. But I will say, if you’re going to stair at the pasty white guy with a hard-to-describe-its-color-accurately-beard, maybe don’t do it when you’re going 15 mph on a bike, facing in the wrong direction! *sigh.....Some people’s kids...

But what really bothered me, especially at the time, was the father-of-three who straight-up filmed me on his phone from 5 feet away for a solid 6 minutes, three hallways, and two escalators! I get it, I’m funny looking. But I really think I a picture would have done just fine...

One of the things that bothered me the most about that experience was that (a) he had a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, (b) his daughters seemed rather embarrassed, (c) he filmed me with the screen aimed at me so I could watch myself on his phone, (d) there was text on the screen, and (e) it went on for a solid 6 minutes.

In hindsight, I was wearing sunglasses and a hat, in a subway system, in the morning, heading to the center of Beijing. Maybe he thought I was a celebrity? I had spoken to a Communications graduate student the other day who happens to be black, and he told me the story of how a citizen here pull out their phone with a picture of Samuel L. Jackson on it, and gestured to him as it to ask if it were him...even though SLJ is for sure at 70 years old and this kid is no more than 35. And he looks 25. #smh

Anyway, after dealing with whatever the hell that was, I got to visit the museum! They, for whatever reason, were not allowing people to bring their charging blocks into the museum (external battery that you can use to charge your cell phone and other devices on-the-go), but more surprising to me was just how many people carried one with them! At least, it was surprising until I took a moment to think about it. As I’ve mentioned before, basically every payment made in Beijing is through WeChat, which needs internet access, so I guess it shouldn’t be too surprising. You also really can’t navigate through the city with some sort of Maps app; there are just too many bus routes, train routes, terminals and stops to keep logged in your head.

As far as the museum itself goes, the gifts to China from foreign governments exhibit and the Ancient China exhibit themselves took most of the day. Also, no surprise: the gift that took up the most floor space was given by a U.S. President. I also got a refresher in 8th Grade Social Studies. Too many small countries to remember all of them, and that space made me feel somewhat moronic.

The Ancient China exhibit was exceptional, though. They broke up the last, oh...750,000 years of human-ish life in China into 8-10 separate eras, the first few cataloguing the life and evolution of Homo erectus pekinensis into Homo sapien, while the latter eras were segregated dynastically. I’ve never seen the progression of human evolution laid out in such detail! The rock tools became better rock tools, then pottery and paper, stamps, buildings and so much more! There were even ceremonial helmets that would put the Juggernaut to shame!

It was strange, though, to have all of this knowledge just beyond my fingertips both literally and figuratively. The literal sense isn’t too shocking, as I’ve been to a museum before and know not to touch the pieces, but to have placards written in a language that would take years to learn was frustrating. Fortunately, NR has a never-ending supply of patience, and she translated much of the text. She even quizzed me on several of the characters. I’ve worked out how to write “rock” for sure.

After the museum, we wondered over to a nearby mall that, honestly, puts the Mall of America to shame. No joke. This place was huge! It just kept going and going and going! There was a particular alley that has all of the “exotic foods” that you might see on The Amazing Race, which I haven’t tried yet but intend to, but the rest is mostly-outdoor shopping center. Our reason for being there was to find food (we had been in the museum for a bit over 7 hours), and then sit our fine asses down in a movie theater to watch Alita.

We found a restaurant that served food traditionally found where NR grew up. It was exceptional. And the beer just made it better. :P

The movie experience was something else entirely. I’ve gotten used to watching television and movies with subtitles so that, when people decide to talk to me, I can follow along with both bits. Or if people are just talking near me while I’m watching television, I don’t have to rewind the show. That helped a lot; the movie was still spoken in English, but there were Chinese subtitles. I recognized the Chinese character for “1″ frequently enough, but that was about it.

The movie itself was way more than I expected. I shouldn’t be surprised, given that one of the primary characters is played by Christoph Waltz. If you haven’t seen it yet, you should definitely consider it.

Also, additional fun fact: I’m thinking that most (if not all) showings of major motion pictures here are in 3D. *shrug* Side note: we’re going to see Captain Marvel tomorrow and I’M SO FREAKIN’ EXCITED!!!!

After the movie, we wandered back to the subway station and parted ways mid-subway-ride to head home. The next day I spent playing Kingdom Hearts 3 and sipping some beer in the 3rd Floor Lounge. All day. It was blissful.

This workweek has consisted of four main things: teaching responsibilities, a bit of dissertation work, trying out another one of the cafeterias on campus, and reading comic books. Oh, and beer. But that kind of goes without saying, doesn’t it? There’s a convenience store on the other side of the building in front of the Guest House that has cans of beer. You can buy them individual for 3 yuan, or roughly 45 cents. I won’t lie to you: I bought 12 of them and it didn’t cost me more than 6 bucks. And it’s really not bad, and even more convenient than the liquor store I lived by in Denver.

Anyway, as I said, I’m going to see Captain Marvel tomorrow, then to “W-Town” (originally Watertown...so glad they shortened it...) in northern Beijing, which sits at the base of part of the Great Wall. More than 20 people from ICB will be heading up to their on Saturday, so I imagine one of them will take pictures. Probably ML or S. So you’ll have those to look forward to since you know I won’t be taking any!

Oh!!! I almost forgot the biggest thing that happened this week! Actually, it might be the biggest news of my entire stay!!!

I did laundry.

And I washed my slippers. I’m not convinced that they’ve stopped smelling, but I’m holding out hope that I’ve finally figured out how to resolve an issue that I know humanity has been seriously struggling with for decades. I’m on the verge of a breakthrough, people, I swear!

Anyway, time to finish this beer, read a bit more of Scott Lynch’s Republic of Thieves (WE FINALLY FIND OUT ABOUT SABETHA!!!!), and head to bed. Big couple of days ahead...

Sláinte,

BeardyAllen

P.S. I bet you thought I was gonna forget! After class on Wednesday, I worked out how to make a phone call from here to the States to wish my Mom a Happy BIrthday. Caught her at work, and we got to chat for a good long while. It really put a nice cap on my evening, and it seemed it gave her a good start to her day. Anyway, I hope you had a great evening, found something nice at C&B and enjoyed that glass of wine you mentioned! Love you!!

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fantasticworksandwheretofindthem · 6 years

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Baby Troubles

Summary: [Name] seeks out advice from Tom without giving him all the details of the problem.

Notes: mentions of abortion, slight smut, assumed masterbation

Prompt: “Does he know about the baby?”

It was a nice Saturday morning. The sun was smiling down on all the blooming flowers, and the birds were singing their happy little songs. Dogs were barking cheerfully, and cats were napping peacefully as always.

Wrong. All of that was so wrong. This was Georgia we’re talking about, for Christ’s sake. The sun was blazing hot, almost as if he found satisfaction in ruining people’s makeup and hair with the sweat and humidity. Nature’s songs were just a less violent way for male birds to tell other males, “Back off, this bitch is mine.” The dogs in the neighborhood were barking, just not cheerfully. They were either chasing the cars that passed by every few seconds on their way to work, scratching the front door and whining to be let in, or they were growling at the cats who were supposed to be sleeping.

Of course, this was the norm for you. You were used to Southern life. You were raised here [ignore this if you’d rather not prefer this] and you’d worked here for God knows how long. This was a typical Saturday, you thought as you hopped in your car and drove to Starbucks. You ordered the usual for yourself and Alaysia. After paying, you resumed your journey and stopped by the dollar store, picking up every flavor of Ben & Jerry’s in stock, double-stuffed Oreos, and a ton of sour candies.

“Tough breakup?” the cashier asked with an apologetic smile as you went to checkout.

You smiled sadly at the college-looking brunette. “My best friend’s having a tough time. Neither of them wanted it.”

She nodded sympathetically. “I figured it was somethin’ like that, since you’re the one buyin’ everything. Last serious breakup I had, I refused to leave my bed for a month.”

“Sounds about like my best friend.” You paid and grabbed the bag.

“I hope she feels better soon.”

“Thank you.” It was instances like this that kept your faith in humanity intact.

You continued on your way to Alaysia’s house. You two had a whole comfort day planned. She and Harrison had just broken up about two weeks ago, so the day was going to be filled with junk food, sappy movies, and soppy, tear-soaked cuddles. You would’ve scheduled this day earlier, but she had shut herself away from everything, even working from home after she talked herself out of taking more sick days.

“Honey, I’m home!” you called after you expertly opened the door while holding the drinks between your arm and waist while the Dollar General bag rested on your forearm.

Suzie, your best friend’s fourteen-year-old mutt, waddled her way to the living room as quickly as she could to greet you. Judging by the loud thud prior to her entrance and the way she was limping, you assumed the near-blind dog had fallen off the bed in her excited stupor and rushed attempt to see you.

“Hi, sweetie.” You bent down and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead before she licked your cheek (to which you grimaced in disgust) and led you to your best friend’s room.

“Alaysia?” you called, setting the drinks on the nightstand and the bag on the bed when you didn’t see your best friend. “Where are you?”

You heard sobs and sniffles coming from the bathroom, so you made your way there. To say you were shocked at the scene would be an understatement. There were about four or five pregnancy tests lying on the wooden floor all around Alaysia, and she had another in her hand, just staring at it as she bawled. You stood, frozen as if you had looked into Medusa’s eyes, until your body kicked into Best Friend Mode, where you tore your feet from the ground and hurried to her, dropping down beside her. You pulled her into a hug, rubbing her shoulder and arm while she soaked the front of your (Tom’s) T-shirt with salty tears and snot. Any other time, you would have asked her to explain what happened, but in this case, it was pretty obvious. While you didn’t know all of the details, you had taken Sex Ed in school.

After what felt like a decade, which was really probably a half hour, Alaysia seemed to not have any more tears left in her (for now). She pulled away, wiping away her tears.

“I’m pregnant,” she whispered. Your smartass self wanted to say that Trump had also won the presidential election, but you figured it would be best to bite it back.

Instead, you opted out for, “When did you realize?”

“My lady week was late,” she said quietly, almost as in a daze, like she couldn’t believe this was happening. In all honesty, she probably couldn’t. “And not by just a few days, but a whole week. So I got worried, and I got Blythe to buy me a few. The first one was positive, but then the second was negative, so she bought some more.”

“Wait, where is she now?” You hadn’t remembered seeing her little, green Bug in the driveway.

“She went to her house to get her I Love Lucy collection.”

Alaysia loved I Love Lucy. It was always nice to know that when you weren’t here for your best friend, her older sister was.

“Does he know about the baby?” You asked tentatively.

“Harrison?” she sniffled and wiped her nose with the long sleeve of her Marvel shirt, which you recognized now was Harrison’s. “No. You and Blythe are the only ones I’ve told.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“I don’t know!” Alaysia exclaimed, suddenly very snappy. Wow, these mood swings were coming quickly. “It’s not like I have many options. I’m not gonna sentence this poor, innocent thing to a horrible life of bouncing around in the foster care system because no one deserves that, but I can’t give up Ireland! I can’t stay here, I won’t. This is a huge deal for me!”

Alaysia had pretty much had her life planned out since she was sixteen. Having a kid before marriage and right as a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity came up for her was not anywhere in the agenda.

“You could always –”

“If you say abortion, I swear to freakin’ Athena, [Name]! I may be pregnant, but I am not afraid to kick your ass!”

You held your hands up in defense. “I wasn’t going to say that, I swear!”Alaysia was very pro-choice, but you knew abortion would never be a choice she herself would make. She’d rather die than kill a baby who hadn’t even gotten a chance to prove itself yet.

“Oh,” your best friend said, her anger visibly seeping away. “What were you gonna say?”

“You could have the baby and let Harrison raise it,” you said quietly.

“I can’t dump this much responsibility on him,” she pouted. You suppressed a sigh. She was making this so much more difficult. “This is a baby. It’s a whole lifetime.”

“Okay, well, let’s take a breather,” you suggested. “When are you gonna tell people?”

She shrugged. “I was kinda hoping I could keep this to myself until I know exactly what to do.”

You suppressed another sigh. You heard the door open and close, followed by Suzie’s slow, heavy feet hitting the floor. “Well, let’s watch I Love Lucy and get fat on ice cream and candy.”

–

It had been a week since you had gone over to Alaysia’s house. She had still not told anyone else, and she and Harrison were still in their own heartbroken stupors. No one had caught on to her secret yet, dismissing her increasing mood swings as a result of the breakup and stress of leaving the place she’d always known to live in a foreign place that she’d never even visited.

Tom was home for the weekend. Monday he’d have to leave and continue the promotional tours for the new Marvel movies. You were currently curled up on the couch, reading Simon vs. the Homosapien’s Agenda when he crawled over to you, peppering your stomach with soft, lingering kisses. His lips began to trail up to your collarbone, but you pushed him away.

Pouting, he pulled away and sat back on his legs. “What’s wrong, love?”

“Nothing’s wrong, Eggsy.” You peered over your book at him, giving him a forced smile. Truthfully, you weren’t even paying attention to the words on the page. You were just so stressed about Alaysia that your mind would literally not let you think about anything else. It had been the main reason you’d buried yourself at work and hadn’t left the office until after ten at night. (That, and because you missed Tom and didn’t like to stay at your shared home alone any more than you had to.)

“That’s a lie, and you and I both know it.” Tom plucked the book from your hands, dog-earing the page he suspected you were on (which he was wrong; he folded the left one when you were on the right one) before tossing it on the coffee table and looking back down at you. “Ever since I got in Friday, you’ve barely said two sentences to me, and have given me even less physical action. So either you’re cheating on me, you want to break up and don’t want to tell me, or something else entirely is stressing you out.”

“Cheating and breaking up are, like, the top of the list of things that I never wanna do.” You tugged on his sweatpants to pull him downwards, pressing your lips to his to assure him. Part of your plan was to distract him so he wouldn’t keep asking you questions about what was bothering you. So far, your plan was working as Tom had now removed his lips from yours and was attacking your neck with his tongue and teeth. He began tugging down your plaid pajama shorts when suddenly he stopped and pulled away.

You stuck your bottom lip out in a pout and whined, trying to pull Tom back, but he stayed sitting up, seemingly regretfully and with all the strength he could muster. “No. Tell me what’s wrong.”

You sighed and pushed yourself up into a sitting position, crossing your legs applesauce style. Part of you hated Tom for not letting the two of you get started, but the rest of you loved him for wanting to get through the problem first.

“I need some advice,” you said, trying to think about how to word this dilemma. “This girl I know.. She and her boyfriend got a little careless, and she got pregnant.”

“Am I allowed to ask who the girl is?” Tom asked, to which you shook your head. “Worth a shot. Alright, continue.”

“Well, she doesn’t want the baby, but she refuses to put it up for adoption, and it would kill her if she had an abortion.” You bit your lip, fiddling with the strings of your shorts.

“Has she told her boyfriend?” Tom asked. When you shook your head, he asked why.

“She found out after they broke up.” Tom made an ‘Oh’ sound, and you nodded your head, your lips pressed together tightly. “And she doesn’t wanna put all the responsibility of the baby on the guy because she thinks it wouldn’t be fair.”

“Well, yeah, it wouldn’t,” Tom said.

“So what should she do?” The more you left out names, the more you were worried Tom would think you were talking about yourself.

“You said they’re broken up, right? As of right now, they’re no longer together?” You got the feeling your worries had some truth behind them based on Tom’s questions and slightly panicked expression.

“Yes, they’re already broken up,” you repeated. “They’ve been broken up for a while now.”

“The first thing she needs to do is tell the guy,” Tom answered, visibly more relaxed than before. “Then they both need to talk with both of their families, instead of stressing out my poor love bug.”

Tom ‘booped’ your nose, and you giggled. “Thank you.”

“Now let’s say you and me practice havin’ a baby of our own, eh?” He cocked a smirk and leaned in to finish what you two had started earlier, but you quickly shut that down.

“Later, babe, I promise,” you said as you pecked his cheek and hopped off the couch like a box spring. “I have to go give your awesome advice to someone who desperately needs it.”

And with that, Tom was left all by his lonesome, with only himself to take care of his needs. ;)

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