#AND THE YOU DON'T EVEN TELL HER YOU ARE FIRING HER AND SHE FINDS OUT VIA TWEET

[crilbyte]

Hi, I was wondering if you could do an Alastor x reader one-shot inspired by the song 'Don't you dare make me fall in love with you' by Kaden MacKay?

Ooooh my gosh, I love this! This is so cute. I love the idea of an angrily lovesick alastor.

I wasn't sure if you wanted a smutty oneshot or not, so I stopped right before it.

Update! Due to popular demand I've made a Part 2. It's 18+ so be aware!

Everything had been going so well. He'd wormed his way into the hotel, Charlie trusted him, he'd even gotten her to make a deal with him. Everything had been going according to plan. Until YOU showed up.

At first it wasn't so bad. Sure, you were pretty and intelligent and the only one who could make a decent cup of coffee in the whole hotel. Sure you were funny and sweet and the only one he could stand to sit with in the study to read. You were quiet when it called for it and loud when it was okay. That was all.

But then Alastor started noticing when you weren't there instead of just when you were. He began to schedule when he would read by the fire in the study for when he'd know you were there. It was one of these times that made him realize something might be wrong with him.

Alastor went to the study, ready to read silently alongside you as you both usually did at this time only to find you missing. It was then that he heard Charlie and Angels voices from outside in the hall.

“...no, she's just taking it really hard,” Charlie says softly.

“It’s not her fault,” Angel insists. “Girl needs to chill.”

“You know how she is, her reason for being down here is pretty different from most people's.”

“Yeah, I get that an’ all… But it's still *not* her fault. That crazy motherfucker deserved what he got. Fuck him.”

“Still, she’s just like this. She feels responsible for his death, even if he arguably did deserve it.”

“So, now what? Do we just let it play out?” Angel asks, seemingly sincere.

“I… I don't know,” Charlie sighs, exasperated. “I tried to talk to her, but she won't let me into her room. She’s locked herself in. So, yeah I guess…”

*So… you are in her room were you?* Alastor thought, already beginning to fade into shadows. Then that’s where he would go…

He hadn't even fully corporealized before he could hear the quiet sobs. Alastor slowly approaches the lump in the bed, a curled-up you hiding under the covers like a scared child. He sits beside you, a gentle hand on what he assumes is your head.

“My dear, what troubles you so…?” His crackled voice asks.

With a jump, you throw the covers off of your head, not having realized he was there. The look of shock on your face would have been quite amusing if it wasn't layered over red puffy eyes and an even more pallid complexion than you usually had.

“Alastor!” you chirp, quickly looking away and wiping your eyes. “W-what are you doing here? I thought I locked the door.”

“Indeed you did, luckily I am not bound by such trivial things,” Alastor replies proudly.

You give him a slightly irritated look. He’d take it; it was better than crying.

“I overheard that you were inconsolable up here, wouldn't even let Charlie in. That’s typically my cue to step in. So do tell, what can I do for you? My purpose here is to help after all.”

You give him a skeptical look. This wasn't exactly out of character for Alastor, but you know better than to assume that he would ever do anything purely out of the kindness of his heart.

“I'm not making any deals with you, Alastor,” you say, turning away from him and pulling the covers up to your shoulders.

“Who said anything about a deal?” He replies, only inches from your face.

You scream, jumping up to a sitting position. “Hell’s sake, Alastor. I wish you wouldn't do that.”

Alastor didn't reply, instead choosing to tilt his head with a closed-mouth smile.

With a sigh, you seem to give up. You look down at the sheets, your finger tracing an embroidered pattern on the duvet. “It’s about why I'm down here” you finally admit. “It's… just hard. It's the anniversary of when it happened and it's just…”

“Let me see if I've got this straight,” Alastor asks, spinning his cane. “You feel guilty for the sin that brought you here?”

You nod silently.

“And what exactly was that?”

You look up at him, nervously. “Murder…”

Alastor's eyes glint. He would never have guessed. “And what caused you to do such a… heinous crime against God?”

“He was a friend of my brothers. He was trying to blackmail me into… into doing porn for him.”

“So you murdered a man who'd threatened you?”

You nod. “And other girls.”

“Bit of a pimp, then eh?” He grins, sounds like you did the world a favor.”

You’re taken aback by that, you hadn't even considered that. You look down at the bed, little sniffles being the only sound between the two of you. Alastor moves closer, taking your chin in his thumb and first finger, forcing you to look at him.

“Now… I believe I asked you a question,” he chirps out, voice low and ridden with static. “What do you need? Your any desire is mine to fulfill. No deals necessary.”

You just stare up at him, stunned. There had to be a catch, right? Alastor was not *kind*. He didn't do things for no reason. His goal was always to further his own plans. But no matter how much you try, you can't figure out what he could get out of this, besides your trust.

“Come, my dear. Surely there's something, anything I can do to help,” he tries one last time.

The words fall from your mouth before you can stop them. “Stay with me tonight…”

Alastor pulls back slightly, eyes widening, his grin still present, but nervous. “You want me to…stay?” He asks.

You just nod, moving towards him. “Please?”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“Wait, wait, wait,” Rosie throws her hands up, waving them. “She wanted you to stay the night?”

Alastor takes a sip of his coffee, nodding.

“So how'd she take the rejection?” She asks playfully, raising an eyebrow.

“Whatever do you mean?” Alastor questions, lightly placing his cup back on its saucer.

“Well you didn't sleep with her,” she says with a scoff.

Alastor doesn't respond, instead taking another sip from his cup.

Rosie's eyes grow. “Alastor. You didn't.” Her hand flies up to cover her mouth in shock.

“I did as she asked. I'm not one to go back on a promise.”

“And… so… what was it like?” She asks, genuinely interested now.

He ponders, eyes looking off into the middle distance with thought as his brows pull together. “Warm?”

Rosie chokes on her tea.

“I haven't slept that well in a long time, frankly. It's not something I've ever been interested in before.”

“I'm well aware,” she all but stutters out.

Alastor takes another long sip from his coffee before continuing. “Since then, she’s had me stay with her every night this week. Which is the subject of the advice I came to you for.”

Stunned silence. Rosie can't think of a single word. She had not expected this. Instead, she just nods, motioning for him to continue.

“At least she doesn't snore,” he jokes, his canned radio laughter echoing.

“She doesn't…” Rosie blinks a few times, realization setting in. “Wait, so you didn't…”

“Hmm?” Alastor raises an eyebrow, peering at Rosie over his monocle. “Didn't what, my dear?”

“*Sex* dear,” she says bluntly, smirking.

Alastor's eyes are suddenly as wide as Rosie had ever seen them. With his trademark grin still plastered on his face, it was a pretty comedic expression.

“Oh, no, no,” Alastor says through a laugh once his initial shock wears off. “Absolutely not, no. I have no interest in such things. No, no.”

Rosie's grin grows as she squints at her old friend, analyzing every word, every moment. Something was off, and then it struck her.

“Darlin’, you’re dizzy with her,” she says flatly, sipping her tea.

Her words actually silence him for a moment. She couldn't mean that. She was wrong.

“You must be mistaken,” he says, attempting to brush the comment off while readjusting the silverware on the table.

“Well, let's just think about it for a minute. You like her, right?”

“Indeed. She's intelligent, powerful, and quite the little spitfire when she wants to be,” he admits readily.

“And you like being around her? She doesn't make you uncomfortable?”

“Quite the opposite. She goes out of her way to ensure that I am quite comfortable.”

“Al, I think you love this girl,” she says with a squeak of barely contained excitement.

"No,” he says a little more forcefully than intended. “I do not love her. I *like* her, I will readily admit that. But I do not love her. I don't love anyone. I only find it enjoyable to be around her, and I attempt to do what I can for her to be happy and fulfill this silly desire of hers to accend.”

“And you are willing to brutally murder anyone who gets in the way of that..." She adds.

Alastor makes a point not to acknowledge her statement.

“Oh sweetie, honey, darling,” she coos teasingly, reaching a hand out on the table to him. “That’s how I felt about my dear Franklin. Well, before things grew cold between us and he had that *horrible accident~.*”

Alastor's smile is unwavering, but his eyes give away quite a bit. He was thinking, fighting these suggestions in his head, but he trusted Rosie. She'd never done him wrong before. In fact she had even gone out of her way for him on multiple occasions. If she was saying it, she meant it.

“If any other soul in this realm spoke those words to me…” he trails off, but Rosie understands.

“I might be off the mark,” she admits, throwing her hands up. “But promise me you’ll think about it. After everything that girl has gone through, she deserves at least that much.”

The walk home is far from peaceful. Alastor’s mind is plagued with thoughts of his conversation with Rosie. She was one of the only souls in hell he would ever admit to feeling anything even remotely close to “trust” in. He wants to scoff, wave away such frivolous accusations and move along; but when he tries, something deep in his brain tugs at him. Like a hook stuck in a fish that was too stubborn to be reeled in.

With a heavy sigh, Alastor walks into the hotel. There are more sinners there than usual. The sight lifted his spirits, Charlie would be happy. Though quickly his grin twists to one of chagrin. It happened again. What was this? Surely Rosie wasn't right. He knew himself. He was The Radio Demon, one of the most feared overlords in hell, serial killer, and cannibal. There was no way that he-

Alastor’s eyes lock onto you, standing at the bar, back against the wall, hands up in a defensive position while some… *kreatin* stood in front of you, fist against the wall beside your head, keeping you there. He was suddenly boiling with rage. His grin shifts to a sneer, antlers growing steadily as his legs take him closer to the offending and soon-to-be *deceased* sinner.

“No, I’m sorry, I really don't want any…” he hears your non-confrontational voice and his throat burns.

“Come on,” the man’s gravely voice insists. “What’s one drink? It's on me.”

“I believe the lady said N͇̱͐̿͛́o̷͖̤̺̥͈̲̓̓.̢͙̼͈̝ͫ͊̋ͅ.” Alastor’s voice contorts, his eyes turning to dials as he grows in size.

The man stutters, mumbling out apologies before turning and quickly attempting to escape. Alastor made to follow but feels tiny hands on him, turning harshly to see who dared to stop him, only to see your small form hugging his arm. It was as though you had poured cold water over him. He shrinks back down to size, his grin shifting from its twisted form to a much softer one as he takes in your trembling frame.

“Thank you,” you whisper.

He reaches a hand up and pats your head gently and you grip him tighter.

“Thank you, Alastor…Thank you.”

Alastor closes his eyes and takes a deep breath through his nose.

*Fuck*…

The next week was difficult…

It was as if everything was conspiring together to find new and unique ways to piss Alastor off. Between having to restrain himself from tearing to shreds and devouring a new resident at the hotel after he disturbed you with extremely inappropriate remarks one fateful afternoon, and him finding himself genuinely happy at the sight of you when you were telling Charlie about it later… It felt as though his sanity was being used as a yo-yo. But this was not the end of it, or even the worst of it to come.

On one quiet afternoon, Alastor is sitting in the study, reading a book and sipping coffee, relaxing. Or at least, he *had* been relaxing. It was rather difficult to unwind when you are being watched.

Out of the corner of his eye, Alastor can see Charlie peeking in through the doorway. Each time he looks up to welcome her in, she disappears. She even begins just walking past the doorway over and over as though she is trying to work up the courage to go in, only to change her mind at the last second. After about ten minutes of this cat-and-mouse game, Alastor can't take it anymore.

“Are you going to enter, my dear, or are you planning on just staring the entire night?” He asks, not looking up from his book.

“O-oh. Sorry,” Charlie enters sheepishly, walking to sit in a nearby plush chair.

“So what brings you to me this afternoon?” Alastor asks, closing his book and placing it on the little table beside him.

“Um,” she looks down at her hands which are stuck between her thighs. She really did seem quite nervous. “I wanted to ask you for some advice?”

He perks at that. “Of course, my dear. Ask away, I’m always happy to help.”

“It's for a friend of mine.”

Okay, that doesn't narrow anything down, he thinks.

“A mutual friend of ours,” she continues.

And that narrows it down considerably. So she is talking about you, Alastor decides.

“Yes, and what problem does our friend have.

“Okay, so… There’s this guy…”

It was as though a hole opened in his chest. Three little words. Why had they affected him so strongly? He needed to quash this ridiculous and frivolous emotion.

“And you came to me?” He asks, examining his claws. “My dear, I'm hardly the sentimental type.”

“Well, he’s uh, a lot like you. Old fashioned, proper.” She looks so nervous to be asking him this, her face is red, which was quite noticeable with her pale complexion. “She… she *really* likes him, but she doesn't know how to tell him. So I hoped maybe you could help me give her some advice…?”

Alastor wants nothing more than to ask this man’s name and hunt him down.

The thought causes him to pause. What a strange intrusive thought. He attempts to shake it off, turning his attention back to Charlie.

“Well,” he begins. “That isn't much to go on.” Alastor crosses his legs, it feels as though he was trying to tie himself into a knot. What an annoying feeling.

“Ok, so… he’s smart and generous um…” Charlie bites her lip, “Funny?”

Alastor remains silent, this isn't very useful information.

“Is he a sinner, dear?” he inquires.

Charlie perks at that. “Oh, yes actually.”

He has to suppress a growl. *So it was some lowly human then,* He thinks as though he in't the same. He attempts some deduction. A sinner who identifies as male. Old-fashioned. Proper… That likely ruled out the recently deceased. Apparently “smart” and “funny”. Though Alastor mused he couldn’t be *that” smart to have ended up on his shit-list. He was beginning to compile a list of suspects. Just as he was about to ask another probing question, there came a voice from the door.

“Hey, Charlie, there’s some new girl here who swears that you told her she could have a room with a jacuzzi?” Angel says incredulously. “Bitch, if we have rooms with jacuzzis why the *fuck* am I staying in a traditional fucking suite?”

“Oh, uh, I think she may have misunderstood,” Charlie begins before turning to Alastor. “Sorry, I think I’ll have to deal with this personally… Thanks for listening, but, honestly… you can forget it. It’s not that important anyway.”

With that, she stands and leaves, though through the doorway Alastor can swear he saw Angel playfully elbow her ribs, though he couldn't begin to guess what that was about.

A sinner who was smart, generous, and funny. This was sounding less and less like someone who would have ended up in hell. He would do more reconnaissance later. For now, he wanted to prepare for his radio show tomorrow, hoping it could take his mind off this itching feeling in the back of his head.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

It's quiet in Alastor’s room. The only sounds coming from the ticking of his grandfather clock and the quiet sounds of jazz from his gramophone. It had been a rough day, well… a rough fewI days. But this afternoon seemed to be going more his way, he thought. At least until he hears a knock at his door.

Alastor sighs, letting his head fall over the back of his chair. Who could it possibly be at this hour? After so much inner turmoil, he had very much wished to just relax in his room. It seemed as though even that was asking too much. Alastor steadies himself, pinching the bridge of his nose, and stands. He opens the door only to be surprised. Outside stood a very nervous looking Charlie. With a quirk of his brow; Alastor's grin grows.

“And what, may I ask, brings you to my humble abode at such a late hour?” He asks.

“Well,” she begins with a twitchy look in her eye. “Tomorrow we're doing a sort of graduation party,” she begins to explain how she has a surprise party planned for you, that your progress was so much faster than she could have ever assumed and so she wanted to throw you a party before you disappeared up to heaven.

Each new word from her mouth felt like another weight added to the chain that threatened to drag Alastor down into some deeper pit of hell itself.

“You think she'll be heavenbound soon?” He asks, his mouth dry.

“Yes!” She replies cheerfully. “The rain she was down here to begin with was pretty shakey, anyway. To be honest, I'm surprised it's taken this long.”

“You'll have to excuse me, my dear, but I've just remembered I have something very important to take care of,” Alastor says with a harsh smile.

“But I haven't even asked what I came here to-” Charlie attempts to finish, but is cut off as the door closes in her face.

With a determination he hadn't felt in a long time, Alastor turns and I'm stalks towards his table, picking up his book and returning it to its shelf before dissolving into Shadow. He doesn't reappear outside your door, or even attempt to knock. Instead he apparates directly into your room. Luckily you were looking in the direction his shape takes form in so you're not quite as startled by his sudden appearance, even if it does shake you slightly, seeing as how you're in bed and in your nightgown.

“Alastor?” You ask as he solidifies and steps towards you.

"Darling," He whispers, a small smirk on his face at your state of undress. "I'm here to make a deal…”

"a deal...? with me?" You ask, curious.

"Yes, my dear," He murmurs, his tone turning serious. "Charlie has informed me that your ascension is nearing. I have come to persuade you to… make a different choice.”

You cock an eyebrow at him. "Oh... she said that?" You ask. "And why... is that?"

Alastor takes a step closer, his voice dropping to a whisper. "Because, I'd be... lonely, without you here. I've grown fond of your quiet presence, and I don't like the thought of going back to solitude.”

You tilt your head. "But you have Charlie, aren't you and her quite close?"

Alastor pauses for a moment at your question, his eyes narrowing slightly. He never thought you would question his reasoning.

"She... it isn't the same," He growls. "I want you, here... always, keeping me... sane." A hint of sadness crosses his face, but it's quickly replaced by a smirk. "Charlie and I have... similar goals. But we are not close. She doesn't need me the way you do... and she certainly doesn't have... my tastes" He says, taking another step towards you.

You give up on this line of questioning and instead start a new one.

"So you want to make a deal for my soul?" you ask. "You get my soul and in return I can have... anything I want?”

Alastor smiles again, but more genuinely this time. "Yes... that's what I'm proposing. Your soul, in exchange for anything your heart desires." He says with a grin, sitting down on your bed and holding out a hand towards you. "Do we have a deal?”

You feel the static in the air, the sound seeming to fill your ears like a flood as he leans towards you. You watch as his antlers slowly grow and green scratch marks appear in the air, forming into unfamiliar symbols that flash in and out. You look down at his hand, your gaze steeling before you tentatively reach out, but then pause. Just as he thinks you might pull back, you do the opposite, confidently gripping his hand and looking at him with a determined glint in your eyes.

"Deal.”

Alastor chuckles low as you accept his hand and the deal. The static intensifies as he grips your hand back, pulling you closer to him. The symbols in the air flare brightly for a moment before they vanish, leaving a faint glow that's slow to fade. You watch as the green stitching appears in his lips, a gold contract and a quill appearing between you.

You take the pen and sign your name without hesitation. The moment the last letter is written, a flash of green light fills the room and you feel a heavy weight settle around your neck as a neon green collar appears there. The chain attached to it leading to Alastor's still outstretched hand.

Alastor chuckles again as the collar settles around your neck, tugging on it playfully. He brings his free hand up to trace a finger along the chain, watching it with interest before he looks back at you.

"The weight of your decision…” he says. You watch his finger as it slides down the chain, your body leaning towards him. Alastor's finger hooks into the collar, pulling a little harder, causing your body to lean closer to him still. "...is now physically upon you," he finishes, a dark glint in his eyes as he studies you. He leans in close, whispering seductively, "And what could you possibly want so badly you'd be willing to trade your soul for it without a second thought?”

"If I tell you, you can't go back on it right?" You ask, your eyes boring into his. "Just like I can't go back on the deal, you can't either, correct?”

Alastor smirks, a wicked and sinister expression taking over his features. "That's right," he confirms, running his thumb along the collar before letting it fall from his fingers. "Once you've signed the contract, there's no going back. So go ahead. Tell me what is it that could tempt you so drastically. What did you desire?”

You're silent a moment, just staring at him, still leaned in close, before a single word falls from your lips.

"You…”

Alastor tilts his head slightly, processing your word as you stare at each other for a tense, long moment. Slowly, his lips curl into a small smirk.

"You desire me?" He repeats, an almost mocking tone in his voice, but his eyes tell a different story.

You nod, silently moving forward towards him, closing the distance between you. Alastor watches as you crawl across the bed towards him. Something flashes in his expression, but it's gone just as quick as it came. He moves his hand from your collar to the small of your back, pulling you gently closer by slowly reeling you in. Closer, until your body is almost flush with his, able to feel the rise and fall of his chest under his suit jacket, his lips a breath away from yours. You look up at him, blinking rapidly, mouth slightly open.

"Yes," you say in almost a whisper. "What I desire most... is you…”

Alastor closes his eyes, your words causing a visible shiver to run through him. He's quiet for a moment, just simply holding you close before he takes in a deep breath and finally crashes his lips against yours, a low moan rumbling in his chest. You gasp into the kiss, moaning. Alastor takes the chance to slip his tongue between your lips, tangling with yours as he pulls you closer against him. His hands move from your waist and up your back, pulling you impossibly close as he devours your mouth hungrily.

A groan escapes him as he can feel your tongue fighting his own for dominance. He finds he likes the challenge. Alastor chuckles against your lips, breaking the kiss for just a moment before diving back in, hands slipping up under your shirt to rest against the warmth of your skin. He matches your fight for dominance with his own, a growl rumbling through his chest as you continue.

Tonight, Alastor would claim full ownership of you...

[ash-the-lizard-goddess]

You approach what you know as your own gods temple, but as you near the front door, you can tell immediately that something is amiss. Where are the temple guards, the priestesses that sit vigil, waiting for signs from the stars night and signals on the wind in the day? As you approach the door, you hear a muffled, high pitched squeal from within, and as you burst through the door, you find all that was missing outside.

The guards and priestesses are strewn about the main chamber of the temple, their faces contorted into expressions of pleasure, their hands down their pants. if they're wearing pants anymore, that is. Most have stripped, some have passed out, their hands still clutching at their nether regions.

A series of low, deep moans followed by a growl echoes from the back of the chamber, and as you step forward up the stairs towards the altar the source of the noises begins to come into view. the head priestess is there, stripped and bent over the altar, some large, humanoid shape behind her, gripping her hips and giving a loud growl as this creature slams into the priestess a final time, clearly emptying faerself inside the holy woman.

The creature pulls back and releases the priestess after a moment, letting her fall to the floor, a blissful expression of orgasm on her face and the creatures ejaculate leaking out of her freshly fucked hole.

The creature notices you and steps forward, into the light of a burning brazier so you can see faer features closely for the first time. Scales of iridescent purple line the creatures soft form of wide hips and large mounds in imitation of a feminine form. A massive, flat-ended tail swings back and forth behind faer, countered on the front by a member that seems to change shape and size as you gaze, becoming ideal for penetrating you specifically. A long tongue lolls out of a beaked mouth, an expression that would almost look silly if not for the four harsh, yellow, slitted eyes above it. The creature gives what you can only assume is a grin before speaking in a low, naturally seductive voice.

"There you are! My new champion! Oh, how I've waited for this moment." Fae licks along her lipless mouth as they look you over before looking back at the high priestess, still panting and twitching on the floor. "Don't worry about her, i was simply showing her the tenants of her new worship."

You ask nervously, with no small amount of fear, what they mean by 'new worship'

"Oh right, you've been away for some time, haven't you? Yes, I've replaced your old god, he was such a... what's the word... a prude. No room for fun, all mystic signs and prophecies." Two of faer four eyes roll. " But I believe having fun with you mortals is much more entertaining, for both sides."

You protest that your old god was wise and fair, but your words seem... unconvincing. You slowly realize that she must be right, and you feel compelled to obey faer now as your convictions about your old god are drained away in faer presence. You ask what your new goddesses name is, and begin to strip your clothing before you even realize you're doing it.

The creature, your new goddess, steps toward you, their divine cock hardening, a feral look crossing her face in the flickering fire "You may call me Ashley. now, on your knees, my champion. Let me show you how to pray to me."

[katerina-marie]

Don't Go Slowly, Tell Me If You're Lonely (Series)

Chapter 6 (Final)

Gojo Satoru x Reader & (Past) Geto Suguru x Reader

Your relationship with Geto Suguru came to an end somewhere between the day of his betrayal and the day of his death. Your relationship with Gojo Satoru began somewhere in the midst of it all, even without you realizing.

WC: 5.6k

Content: Canon Divergence, Gojo x Female Reader (referred to as such but left descriptively vague), (past) Geto Suguru x Female Reader, Geto's canonical death, friends to lovers, angst, eventual happy ending, fluff, reader is a sorcerer (left vague tho), no use of y/n, vaginal sex (though not super explicit) so please avoid accordingly! More notes below.

Chapter Count: Chp 1, Chp 2, Chp 3, Chp 4, Chp 5, Chp 6 (Final)

Notes: Snippets, milestones, and a happy ending for a character that deserves it.

Chapter 6: In This Sepulcher By the Sea, All That's Left is You and Me (There’s a Hand Being Held Out)

The twinkling of red and gold lights reflected onto the floor-to-ceiling windows of Satoru’s apartment and for how high it was in the sky, they certainly made it look like the stars could be on fire.

Or maybe that was the wine talking. 

A jazzy holiday carol played over speakers tucked into corners you had yet to find, and you hummed along with the tune as you picked up stray cups and leftover plates while Satoru offered goodbyes at the door to the last lingering guests. The hour was late, and after a whole evening dedicated to celebrating the holiday with a gathering of friends and students hosted by you and Satoru, you were more than ready to fall into bed and sleep the night away. 

The party had been intentional, an idea brought to life by both you and your boyfriend in an effort to move past the sting of grief on the anniversary of Suguru’s death (the second year now, and the first in your new relationship with Satoru). To your surprise, it worked. Drinks flowed easily between those old enough, and the students enjoyed their ability to indulge in nice food that they didn’t have to pay for—courtesy of Satoru’s credit card. Gifts were exchanged between one another, merriment was made, and everyone gagged accordingly everytime Satoru caught you under the mistletoe he kept moving strategically around his apartment. 

At the end of the night, when Kugasaki and Itadori were fast asleep in a pile on Megumi’s lap while Panda and Inumaki made sure to capture the scene with photos for posterity’s sake, Nanami and Shoko had cornered you and Satoru in the kitchen. You couldn’t have called it reminiscing, nor would you have said it was a wish for what could have been, but the four of you took a quiet moment to remember a friend as he once was before stowing away the thought for the next year. Afterwards, once the students had been roused and ushered out the door, Shoko and Nanami said their farewells. 

“I’m glad you found your happiness,” Shoko had said, and the fondness of her smile told you that she knew happiness for you came in the form of white hair and blue eyes. 

“You deserve peace,” Nanami had told Satoru while pressing a hand to his shoulder and offering a subtle grin in your direction. All three of you politely ignored the tears that gathered in Satoru’s eyes before he brushed them away. 

“Well,” Satoru called, wiping his hands against one another as he met you in the kitchen, “it’s just you and me now.” 

You met his eyes with a tired smile on your face as you remained elbow deep in his sink in order to wash the last remaining dishes before the two of you retired for the night. Satoru came up behind you to wrap his arms around your waist and lay himself against your back. The weight of him was heavy, but the kisses he pressed into your shoulder were light and full of gratitude, so you let him stay. 

“I think everything went quite well, don’t you?” you asked. Satoru made a noise of affirmation and sighed happily into your neck. “But maybe cool it with the mistletoe next year.” 

He jerked back at that. “I’m not putting any out ever again.” His voice was petulant, and you shot him an amused look over your shoulder as you shook the soap from your hands and reached for a dish towel to dry them on. 

“You know Nanami never would have kissed me,” you assured him, “and vice versa.” Satoru still shook his head adamantly, and you giggled at him from where you had turned to lean back against the counter.

“No sense in leaving things to chance,” he said blithely. “Even if it was an accident and neither of you had realized where the two of you were standing.” 

“Well maybe don’t move it around so much that we all lose track of it, Satoru.” Your boyfriend rolled his eyes, clearly dismissing whatever insinuation you made that you and Nanami being caught unaware under mistletoe was his fault, but he scurried away nonetheless when you swatted him with the dish towel still in your hands. 

“Ready for bed?” Satoru asked once you had put away your makeshift weapon, and you nodded eagerly as you trotted after him to his bedroom. You each hurried through your nighttime routine, barely putting in the effort to do more than brush your teeth, and after slipping into an oversized t-shirt, you made a running leap for Satoru’s bed. You had just managed to huddle yourself under the blankets and curl your knees into your chest when you felt the edge of the bed beside you dip under Satoru’s weight. You peeked your head out and watched carefully as he held out his palm to you. 

“Spare me a moment?” 

You nodded and took his hand in yours so he could help you sit up against the pillows at the head of the bed. While you crossed your ankles over each other, Satoru stretched out one long leg to brace against the floor and then tucked the other under his thigh. He looked pensive, but not troubled, and you waited patiently for him to speak as his gaze unfocused on some point beyond you. 

“I felt like I could finally take a deep breath today,” Satoru said, and while the words came out halted, his tone was steady. “I didn’t spend every minute reminded that I had killed my best friend. It was there in the back of my mind, sure, but I didn’t feel the memory of it breathing down my neck…so thank you. You helped turn the day into something bearable, and gave me a hope for years coming that I won’t always view this date as the worst day of my life.” 

You felt pinpricks in the back of your eyes, and the breathy laugh that came out of you carried the faintest echoes of a sob. “Today was as much for you as it was me,” you told him, reaching out your hand to rub it over his knee and Satoru was quick to cover it with one of his. He was quiet, but nodded his head and you wondered what was occupying space in his mind that would render him close to mute when he was usually anything but. 

“I love you,” he said simply after a minute of silence. There was no consternation furrowing his brow, nor did his fingers drum against the back of your hand unbidden. His expression was light and unburdened while his voice sounded sure and unequivocal. You realized then that his declaration of love did not hinge on your reciprocation, and that his feelings for you would remain unchanged no matter what answer awaited him. The thought had you smiling and leaning into Satoru so you could press your lips against his because you were powerless to feel anything else for him but love in return. The fact that it came softly in the low light of his room made it feel as though your heart could float away.

Satoru, Satoru, Satoru. 

“I love you too.” 

————————————————

Springtime always seemed to bring with it a renewed sense of energy and a particular level of mischievousness that took over the minds of your shared students. If Megumi wasn’t taking his technique to the near extreme everytime an outcome presented itself that wouldn’t lend in his favor, then Itadori was around every corner eating something he shouldn’t, and Kugisaki was inevitably providing humorous—albeit unhelpful—commentary on everything in the background. In short, your students had you, Satoru, and Nanami running very close to ragged in your attempts to keep them alive and in proper training on a day to day basis. 

The three of you would routinely count down the minutes until the weekend would arrive and the students would unleash themselves on the unassuming public now that the weather was warming up. Once they went on their merry way for a day off campus, Nanami would flee to his own home, muttering something about a vacation on a beach far away, and you and Satoru would hole yourselves up in your room, unable to feel comfortable venturing far from the school when you knew of the student’s penchant for trouble. So while your room on campus may not have been as roomy, or comfortable, or luxurious as Satoru’s city apartment, it served its purpose well enough that neither of you minded. At least, that was true until its general lack of privacy would come into question on a lazy Saturday evening. 

You had discovered in your time together that lounging in bed with Satoru could only carry on innocently for so long before one of you was putting a hand or mouth somewhere decidedly not innocent. Fleeting touches turned heavy, clothes found their way to the floor, and your boyfriend had your ankles locked behind his back so quickly it made your head spin. Mindful of the fact that your room was still subject to the ears of occasional passerbyers, you muffled your moans into Satoru’s shoulder while he shoved a pillow in between your headboard and wall lest you make it very clear what was taking place. Besides the yelp that escaped you when Satoru bit down just slightly too hard on your neck or when he groaned your name a touch too loud as you clenched around him, any tell tale sign that the two of you were occupied with each other remained unnoticed and you whispered his name in anticipation of what was to come. 

That was, until, a stampede of footfalls could be heard down the hallway approaching your room, and suddenly the first years were banging on your door in a frenzy while shouting incomprehensibly over one another. Satoru’s look of pure bliss transformed into one of horror above you, and you slapped a hand over his mouth for no particular reason when Itadori shouted your name. 

“Have you seen Gojo-sensei?!” You gaped at Satoru, unsure of exactly what to do or say, and while it wasn’t your first choice, nothing except lying through your teeth presented itself as a viable option. 

“I, uh, have no idea!” you called, hoping the higher than normal pitch of your voice wasn’t as noticeable through the wall and door. “Is something wrong?” 

There was a beat of silence when all noise stopped before Itadori blurted out a very unconvincing “no.” You flailed your hands at Satoru in a panic before letting them land on his shoulders so you could shove him off of you, but he gave an insistent shake of his head. While you knew he wouldn’t consider doing anything inappropriate in front of your students, you had an inkling that he was determined to stay nestled inside of you in the desperate hope they would wander off to find him and let the two of you finish. 

“Well,” you said, swallowing nervously, “if you give me a couple minutes to get ready, I can, uh, help you find him?” You cringed at the way your words came out unsure and slightly guilty, but the students didn’t seem to care as they deliberated something in hushed voices. Satoru was still braced on his hands atop you, and the fool had the gall to let out a chortle at your misfortune.

“I’ll call him,” Megumi sighed, sounding very much put out as Itadori and Kugisaki continued to argue behind him. You didn’t think anything of it, as Satoru’s phone hadn’t been ringing the entire time from where it lay in the heap of clothes by your bed, and—

“I think I’m one of the contacts he has allowed to bypass his do not disturb setting.” Megumi’s tone was full of disappointment, and Satoru’s eyes bulged in a way that would have been comedic in any other circumstance. In an effort to get to his phone and turn it off, you untangled yourself from Satoru and lunged halfway off the bed to swipe for his pants, but alas, time was not on your side and his ringtone blared through your room, unable to go unnoticed by anyone in the vicinity. The outside chatter from the students immediately ceased, and you stared dejectedly at the floor before Satoru looped an arm around your ribs to lift you back up and into the bed. 

“We’ll just give you guys a couple minutes.” Kugisaki’s voice was smug and all knowing when the silence was broken a few moments later, and you slapped your hands over your eyes as white hot embarrassment swept through you. When the footsteps of the students finally faded down the hall, Satoru pulled your hands away from your face, and you were met with his slightly sheepish but thoroughly amused grin. You scowled at him in response and yanked your wrists from his grip so you could throw yourself out of the bed and begin dressing yourself. 

“I have to get an apartment now,” you muttered, eyes wide in disbelief as you stepped into your pants. “I can’t live here anymore, and I have to move out. I’m sure I can find something close to the school…” The strained laughter that left your lips was borderline maniacal, and the way Satoru was reclined back against your pillows (with a sheet draped precariously low on his hips) in a perfect display of nonchalance had your eye twitching. 

“If that’s what you want,” he sing-songed. There was something contemplative in his eyes however, but you were too pent up in anxiety and sexual frustration to bother with it, and you merely scooped up his shirt from the floor to pelt him in the face with it. 

“Just get dressed,” you hissed. 

Later, after hours were spent assisting the students in cleaning up a mess that, thankfully, hadn’t incurred significant property damage to the school or required Shoko’s healing abilities, you and Satoru made your way back to your room to recoup the energy lost from the day. If you ignored the way Kugisaki tittered and Megumi’s nose pinched up in barely veiled disgust while Itadori remained blissfully unaware, you would have sworn that they were grateful for your help. But really it mattered not, because from the tightness of Satoru’s jaw, you knew that the three of them were set for a grueling week of training once Monday came around. 

With little bandwidth left for anything other than falling into a deep sleep, you ignored Satoru’s pouting face and his clear wish to continue off where your time together earlier had abruptly ended, batting away his wandering hands as you changed into your pajamas and buried yourself under your blankets. After a couple minutes of huffing and puffing around your room while he readied himself for bed, Satoru eventually made his way next to you. He whispered something next to your ear about an errand he had to run in the morning, but you were already halfway asleep and fully unbothered. 

So, when you woke up and your boyfriend was nowhere to be seen, you shrugged off any concern for Satoru’s whereabouts and went about your routine. You wouldn’t deny enjoying a morning to yourself without his nose in your neck or his chattering filling every ounce of silence that came upon you two, but as you sat against your pillows sipping on a hot drink and half-heartedly attention to the book in your hands, you started to miss him. When the next thirty minutes went by without a peep from your phone, you reached for it begrudgingly, ready to call him and demand he return. However, a knock at your door interrupted you, and you heard Satoru yelling your name from the other side of it. 

“Just close your eyes before you open the door!” he called. The enthusiasm in his voice this early in the morning had you questioning whether or not you really wanted to do as he said and entertain whatever shenanigans he had gotten himself into, but when your name left his mouth again, you supposed you didn’t really have a choice. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” you drawled, casting your eyes up to the ceiling in a silent request for patience before making your way to the door. 

“Are you eyes closed?” Satoru asked just as you set your hand on the knob.

You snapped them shut. “They are now.” With a little push from his end once you had twisted the knob, the door opened and you shuffled backwards as Satoru made his way inside. He kicked it shut with his foot, and you heard him digging in his pants pocket before he came to a stop in front of you. You stood there unmoving, eyes still closed, and part of you was genuinely curious as to what he was possibly up to. 

“Okay! You can open them.” 

When you blinked against the brightness of your room, you found Satoru standing in front of you with both arms raised. He held an empty box in one hand and a small shiny key in the other. His blindfold laid loosely around his neck, and the wide grin on his face crinkled the corners of his eyes. 

“We’ll obviously need more boxes than just this one,” he said, his words slipping out with barely a breath between them, “and you don’t actually need a key to get into my apartment since there’s a keypad, but I think you get the symbolism behind it regardless.” Satoru pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and the way he squirmed in place ever so slightly while you observed him was endearing and boyish all at the same time. 

“You want me to move in with you?” The question came out hesitantly, but Satoru’s eyes softened when he saw the smile stretch slowly over your lips. 

“Well, you said last night you wanted to move out from here, and while I know my place isn’t exactly close to the school, the student’s have to learn to get around without us proctoring their entire existence, and so I thought now was as good of a time as any.” He finished with a bashful shrug, and you reached out to take the key from his open palm to twirl it between your fingers before curling it into your fist and pressing it against your chest. 

“I’d like that.” 

————————————————

Octobers were always one of your favorite times of the year. The last dredges of the summer heat were swept away by the stirrings of an autumnal breeze, and you waited impatiently for the fall foliage to blanket the hillsides in swaths of rich color. You spent every moment you could soaking in the crispness of the air, and Satoru would watch with obvious adoration everytime you trailed a bit slower in your walks around the school or on your weekend errands to glean just an extra minute or two outside. When he announced on a random Wednesday that the next day’s training was to be canceled in favor of a day out, you weren’t sure who was more excited about a day off—you or the students. 

With no intention to waste the day, you and Satoru woke up that morning and packed a thick down blanket, a bottomless bag of snacks, and a book or two for each of you. You raised a questioning brow at Satoru when he appeared from your shared closet wearing a jacket over this already thick sweater, but you quickly shrugged it off, recalling how he always complained about not running nearly as warm as you. When he declared himself ready, you grabbed him by the wrist to pull him out your front door so you could begin your trek out of the city. 

An hour’s commute later found the two of you at a scantily-populated park just a mile’s exit off the road. You had jogged ahead into the grass to find a secluded spot nestled at the mouth of a bunching of trees a stone’s throw away, barely heeding Satoru’s call for you to wait up for him as he lugged all your provisions in his arms. You gave him an apologetic grin and batting of your lashes once he caught up with you, but you knew he could in no way be cross with you over something so trivial and the soft kiss pressed to your forehead was evidence enough. 

Once the blanket had been settled over the grass and the first round of snacks had been picked clean, the two of you spread out, each with a book in hand. When you stretched back on one arm, Satoru laid his head in your lap. After some time, when your muscles started to ache, you rolled over onto your belly to cradle your book in front of you while Satoru rested his cheek in the small of your back. Halfway through your novel, you flopped onto your side and bunched up one corner of the blanket to prop up your head. Satoru must have tired of his own literary adventure at that point and instead chose to wiggle himself between your arms to tuck his nose against your chest and doze into the afternoon. Contented, you continued reading on. The occasional breeze rustled the branches above you, and every now and then a pair of birds would coo back and forth to each other. You could feel the warm puffs of Satoru’s breathing against your skin, and every once in a while the fingers he had slipped under your shirt would twitch lightly against your back before going still again. If he happened to mutter nonsense in his sleep or let out the infrequent snore, you made a mental note of it to tease him with at a later point. 

Eventually, your body would no longer tolerate lying on hard ground, and your stomach rumbled in a way that was becoming uncomfortable. Setting your book down, you gently shook Satoru awake and his eyes popped open as he let out a sleepy little grunt. 

“I’m hungry,” you told him, swiping a thumb against the pink-hued indention your collarbone must have left on his forehead, and he blinked up at you before sitting up rather quickly. 

“Was I asleep that long?” he asked, turning his head back and forth to scan the rest of the open park and then squint up at the sun that had just passed high noon. You chuckled at the perplexed look on his face, noticing how he seemed just the slightest bit jittery, and then pushed yourself to your feet so you could raise your hands far above your head to stretch out your body. 

“About two hours,” you said, glancing down at Satoru as your arms flopped back against your sides, and you relished in the languidness that now ran through your muscles. “Don’t worry about it though.” You shrugged and turned away from him to bend down and rummage through your bag of snacks for something to tide you over until you got back home. “You must have needed it.” Satoru didn’t say anything back, so you continued to pick through various bags of chips and granola bars that didn’t sound nearly as appetizing as you wanted. Once you had settled on an option for each of you, you turned back to Satoru only to let out a small gasp and drop the snacks from your hand at the sight of him down on one knee before you. 

His hand was held out, and nestled in a black leather box was a ring that gleamed in the sun. The sight he made was certainly unexpected in the moment, but it wasn’t as if you had envisioned anything else for the two of you, and the sheer emotion of it happening then had tears welling in your eyes. 

“I meant to do this earlier,” Satoru confessed. The apples of his cheeks pinkened and you suddenly understood why he had seemed so flustered moments ago. “I intended to take you on a walk or something of the sort, but I fell asleep, and I can’t let us leave here without accomplishing what I had intended.” A wet laugh tumbled from your lips, and you pressed your knuckles against them as Satoru gazed up at you with eyes wide in beseeching adoration. 

“Marry me, please,” he breathed, and the ring box trembled once in his hand. “I promise to never be too much for you, or to ask for more than you can give. All I need is a sliver of your attention. Just a small sign of your affection in my direction will do.”

As if you would ever offer him anything other than your complete and utter devotion. You were whole-heartedly prepared to spend the rest of your life pouring every ounce of it you could into him, an easy task when you knew that Satoru would return it ten-fold, ensuring mutual happiness. And what summation of words could thoroughly enough explain all that his question meant other than—,

“Yes.” 

————————————————

December 24

When you woke up, there was a chill in the air. It wasn’t something to be strictly blamed on the winter weather, and no amount of layered clothing or steaming water trapped in a marble shower would serve to chase it away. It drove you to your closet where you dressed for a walk. You slipped on your engagement ring because it was a part of you now. When you stepped through the opening of the hallway that presented you to the living area, you spotted Satoru leaning against your kitchen island already similarly dressed. He lifted his arm when you approached him, palm up and fingers outstretched, and it was an invitation, a beckoning, a tether to guide you to a place you only half-heartedly wanted to go. You took it and didn’t let his hand go unless required for brief moments of movement. 

You did release it when you and Satoru made it to your destination, a mutual untangling of limbs as you each took a respective seat on the cold ground. You curled your legs under you at the foot of Suguru’s grave to watch as Satoru kneeled by the stone at the front to rip away overgrown blades of grass and brush off a fine layer of dust. If either of you spoke, it was done silently, somewhere in the jumble of your minds where you tried to make sense of everything you wanted to say. 

Because nothing about that situation would ever be so cut and dry, easily condensed and plainly understood. It would stand to say that neither of you owed the world a response that was any sorts of sensible or well organized. If finalizing all that Suguru was into one encompassing emotion would make you unable to balance the enormity of it, then perhaps there was a better suited alternative to having him so well defined.

 When the two of you parted ways from the patch of brown grass and naked branches, each new foot of distance garnered a different flicker of emotion from you both: a yearning for what once was, but desolation for this new future that never would have been otherwise; a deep sense of loss that could only be built on top of but never filled in; equanimity for the thought that Suguru offered his blessing; a zeal for the life with a person present and well loved. 

There was relief in that there was no need to understand it all to move forward, and peace at knowing you didn’t. 

————————————————

You wed Satoru on a hill overlooking the sea at the beginning of a golden summertime. 

Friends, students, peers, and family are gathered to celebrate, and at the end of a flowered path, Satoru stands tall under an archway dripping in gauzy fabric nearly the same white as your dress. 

 It’s just you on your walk to him. There’s no one supporting your arm to give you away. You suppose that it had been done once already, in a time when you wouldn’t have agreed or had the capability to picture a life with someone else entirely. Your hand had already been given and exchanged, entrusted to another in a dead man’s final wish. So no, you don’t need anyone to accompany you down a flower-strewn path, not when every step you take lands in time to a heart that beats the name of the man in front of you (never again for a love since buried) and not when you were already entirely his. Not when the decision belonged only to you and him. 

You reach the archway, and Satoru is there waiting for you. 

His arm lifted, palm upwards and his fingers—,

There’s a hand being held out, and it no longer strikes you with remorse. On a rare night, it will appear in your nightmares to torment you with memories long past, but the balm of warm skin and the lips of someone you love will be there to whisk it away before it has a chance to linger.

There’s a hand being held out, and in it are all the dreams and promises you had once buried under the shade of canopied trees.

Gojo Satoru is holding his hand out to you, and you take it.

A Little Bonus:

“Did we really have to get up this early?” you asked around a yawn. You could blame your exhaustion on any number of things: the hours-long flight you and Satoru took yesterday, the night of newlywed activities in your hotel afterwards, or your general disdain for early mornings without a proper night’s rest. The sun still painted the sky a mix of orange and pink, and there was hardly a car or person to pass by. 

“We can go back to the hotel and take a nap before our next flight this evening,” Satoru said, swinging your intertwined hands together as the two of you strolled down a sidewalk. “Besides, it was you that insisted we have a layover here for this exact reason.” His following grin was cheeky, and when you scrunched up your nose in annoyance, he tugged you against him to press a kiss to your temple as you turned the corner of an old red brick building.

“I know, I know,” you grumbled. You had been adamant when planning your honeymoon that the two of you would stop briefly in the city home to a sleepy old cafe with the best dessert either of you had ever tasted, and your fiancé—now husband—was eager to give in to any whim of yours. 

When the two of you finally stepped through the cafe doors at a time when many had not yet stirred from their beds, you were met with well-worn red brown booths and vintage jazz music still spilling out from the kitchen. No one was waiting to greet you, and you turned to Satoru with a concerned look when the same old woman shuffled out of the back, a cane in hand but still spry in her eyes and smile.

“I recognize you!” she called, and it warmed your heart to be remembered by someone who’s encounter with you was so significantly fleeting. However, when her eyes slid to Satoru, all good will fell clean off her face. 

“And I unfortunately remember you too,” she groused, eyes cutting and full of contempt for your husband as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, but he had his trademark smirk on his face in an attempt to charm her displeasure away. 

Surprised curiosity sent your eyebrows up to your hairline, and you opened your mouth to inquire about what exactly Satoru had done to deserve such ire, but the old woman was already making her way back to the kitchen as she waved her hand behind her head. “Your usual table is free.”

“What was that about?” you asked him as he pulled you along to the corner table by a large window overlooking the street. Satoru shook his head as the two of you sat down in the booth across from one another, and he laughed nervously as he settled himself in the seat.

“It’s really nothing important,” he muttered, cheeks slightly pink, and you wondered if you pestered him enough—or propositioned him thoroughly—if he would talk. The next fifteen minutes would prove you unsuccessful in getting Satoru to divulge his secrets, and you were about to start bargaining when the old woman returned with a large plate balanced on her hand.

“Despite the questionable company you keep,” she told you, taking note of the gleaming wedding rings on both your hands as she sat down the plate heaping with your favorite fruit, “I’m glad you made it back, especially with someone to share your dessert with.” She didn’t give you an opportunity to ask questions before she was walking away with a knowing grin on her wrinkled cheeks. 

“You have to tell me,” you insisted, passing a spoon to Satoru and then picking up your own to begin digging into the dessert, but he sighed heavily and chose to stuff his mouth instead of responding to you. You let it go for now, figuring there would be plenty of time to wring it out of him when the scales were more tipped in your favor, and instead you tucked your foot around his ankle and reached out your empty hand to trace errant shapes along the back of his. 

---------------------------------------------

That's it y'all!

This was mostly a personal project for myself. I hadn't ever written anything (besides the Sukuna series) before this, so I very much appreciate everyone who took time to read and comment! I hope you were able to enjoy it <3

Taglist: @paprikaquinn & @kafanizdakicokiyi

[itsoka-y]

Alright chat is time to ask the real questions here and by real questions I mean who of these kids is chronically online and what flavor of chronically online are they. I bring forth some of my choices (plus a few headcanons)

I just know she ran a Tumblr account like the navy during the golden years where Superwholock reigned supreme I just can feel it in my bones. She also strikes me as someone who enjoys a bit of a conspiracy but she'll have an alternate account for that (and also I think this was a phase for her to develope her writing and journalism skills through her posts even though she was kinda pulling some things out of her ass sometimes but then again she was 13)

Kinda self-explanatory if not even canon. He'd be one of those annoying ass otakus who try to gatekeep fucking naruto of all things because if you cannot name the sharingan Sasuke used in episode 234 then you're not a real fan.

(i have not watched a single episode of Naruto and it shows i'm sorry)

He's also a misogynist and would engage in discourse with any fujoshi that crosses his timeline because why you forcing Naruto and Sasuke to be gay?

Unrelated but this is like my favorite picture of him of all time i'm afraid he's the only man i'll choose over a bear

My favorite headcanon is that he's the wildest card you'll ever cross paths with in your life. Like you see him from afar and you kinda get a feel for what he's going to be like (shy, polite bordering on coy, reserved etc. etc.) but then you get to meet and sure it's not like he's outregous or anything but him cracking a galvinazed steel and eco-friendly wood venneer joke or him sending one of those alpha images of an anthropomorphic wolf ripping its shirt would have never crossed your mind. And he has such a wide range as well; one day he's referencing world is mine by hatsune miku the next day you hear him quote breaking bad (someone cooked here) after someone scores a goal with a new hissatsu technique. He definitely knows what the omegaverse is

He really is oomf

Queen of tiktok. She'd be one of those younger gen z kids/older gen alpha that kinda romanticizes being a fangirl during the 2010s and feels nostalgia for it even if she never lived through those years. She also dabbles into some of the booktok territory, but I don't see her as those who only care for books based on "spicyness" but one of them "you like enemies to lovers because you want to believe that someone will fall in love with you even after seeing the ugliest parts first" kinda gals

When he's not training or working to support his little siblings, you bet your ass he's on facebook. He shows you memes that were relevant like two or three whole years ago but you don't have the heart to tell him so you just awkwardly laugh, reinforcing the cycle (the only ones who'd genuinely find them funny would be Tsunami but that's only because he's chronically offline)

He's so out of the loop and let's pray to god It stays that way. Bless his little soul

Hear me out. Terrible case of ipad kid even if he got out of it. I mean, he was playing to recreate the fire tornado when he was five years old and I like to imagine him as that one scene of little deku asking his mom to play on the computer the video of all might saving people but it's him pestering yuuichi to play him a compilation of all of Gouenji's hissatsu techniques. I find it adorable thank you very much. He's still lurking somewhere on twitter with his private account (he has 0 followers and he'd like for it to keep being that way) where he just vents about his life and feelings (look he's gone through so much and he needs a place to let it all out ok?) and retweets stuff from other emo kids online. I also know his spotify playlists are curated to perfection

As any child with a troubled home life, he copes by being an absolute MENACE online. He for sure has told people to off themselves at some point. Has sided with Drake during this years beef with Kendrick Lamar for the hell of it (doesn't even listen to the guy's music). Thank god the FFI wasn't running digital footprints' checks way back when because his ass would not have made the call into the team because of it. Got tamer as an adult and realized how fucked up some of the shit he was doing and saying was but has still gotten into trouble for some of his old tweets (he's definitely ruffled some feathers for quite a few football fans online and is quite the controversial character, you either love him or hate him i fear)

Same as Fudou but whereas Fudou was trolling through the league of Legends chat and on call of duty lobbies this one was trolling on fortnite. Maybe even roblox

And that would be it. Feel free to add as many other characters as you feel like because this is so fun to do and I want to see someone else's takes to this kinda thing 🫣

[sissylittlefeather]

Your Love's Been a Long Time Coming: Chapter 6

A/N: I'm on a roll with this one and I have the series planned to the end, so don't be surprised if I get the rest of these out relatively quickly. I'm excited to take you on the roller coaster that is the end of this one. But I think you'll love how it ends! Just hang in there!

Need to catch up? Masterlist here.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, kissing, cussing, implied sex, alcohol use, angst

Word count: ~2.7k

Reminder: this is FICTION. Please do not come at me if your favorite people don't act the way you think they would/should. It's called fanFICTION for a reason. Thanks 😬

She fades into the background easily, watching the feud that happens between Ann Margaret and Priscilla, her love for him never diminishing, but they never finish the conversation that they started.

******

Vivian spends the next year in abject misery. She moves to California in an attempt to get away from anything that reminds her of Elvis and try to jumpstart her acting career. That doesn't cure her lovesickness though. She misses Elvis desperately, kicking herself for wasting all that time telling him no. But then she realizes that even if they were together, he probably would've left her for Ann Margaret. The few times she does see him, it's obvious that he's smitten. This is the most in love she's ever seen him and she desperately wants to be happy for him. But she just can't. She runs through several guys before realizing that she's tired of the emptiness. She takes a vow of celibacy and tries to focus on her career and her hobbies. Writing poetry helps a little, but most of it is about Elvis so she ends up crumpling it and throwing it in a trash can or a fire. Just when she runs out of money and is about to go back to her stepfather in Germany, she stumbles upon modeling and finds herself more successful at that than acting. She throws herself into it, trying to ignore her pain. All in all, there doesn't seem to be a reason to go on, but she keeps trudging along, hoping something will change eventually.

******

Elvis spends the next year in a lovestruck bubble of happiness. Ann Margaret challenges him and enlivens him and brings out the best in him. She's everything he never knew he wanted. He knows he still has Priscilla at Graceland, and at night, after Ann has fallen asleep, he feels the guilt of leaving her behind. The promise to marry her still hangs over his head.

But in the really late hours on nights that he struggles to sleep at all, he thinks about Vivian. Where is she? What is she doing? Does she ever think about him? He knows how unfair it is to even have that thought, but it's there nonetheless. A couple of times his mind even drifts to the conversation they started and didn't finish. How might things be different if they had finished it? Would he have said no to Ann if he knew he had Viv? That's a question he can't answer.

Overall, he's happy. He's having his cake and eating it too.

And then Ann Margaret does an interview where she tells the reporter that she and Elvis have plans to get married. He knows this isn't possible, no matter how much he loves her. He has an agreement with Priscilla's family to marry her. And beyond that, he's not even sure that Ann would be the best choice for his wife. At the end of the day, she's too much like Vivian, too independent and headstrong. Too focused on her own career. That doesn't mean he wants to end things with Ann Margaret necessarily, but Priscilla doesn't give him an option. She wants the contract honored, and soon.

So Elvis ends the affair with Ann Margaret shortly after his conversation with Priscilla. He knows he's done the right thing, but that doesn't mean he isn't hurt. He sinks into a deep depression, refusing to leave his house or see anyone, including Priscilla. After a week, his Memphis mafia guys start to get really concerned. They're not sure what to do to bring him out of this funk.

Finally, one of them comes up with the idea of calling Vivian. They know he hasn't seen her in months, but she's managed his low moods before with grace and strong but subtle encouragement that eventually brought him back. She's their last hope, a desperate grasping at a final straw. They call her, hoping she'll agree to come.

******

Vivian find herself on the porch of Graceland with a grocery bag in one arm, knocking loudly with her other hand. She's not quite sure what she's doing here, why she agreed to come, but here she is. Turns out her heart can't tell him no, no matter what he's put her through.

She knocks again. She's been standing out here for almost fifteen minutes and the bag is starting to get heavy. The bottles clink together as she shifts.

"Elvis! It's me!" She breaks down and hollers through the window, hoping he will hear her. Finally, she hears movement inside the dark house. After a few more minutes the door opens just a crack.

"What are you doing here, Viv?"

"The guys called me. So I'm here. With presents." She jiggles the bag in her arms and the bottles clink again.

"I don't drink, Viv."

"Yeah? What have you got to lose?" She hears him sigh deeply and then he opens the door. He's disheveled in a way she can barely comprehend. His hair is everywhere and he clearly hasn't shaved recently. He has on a robe with no shirt underneath and pajama pants.

"Oh, Elvis."

"Don't fucking say anything." She walks through the door and sets the bag down, turning to face him. Then, she cups his cheek with her hand gently.

"Does it hurt this badly?" He breaks down and grabs her tightly, weeping on her shoulder. He whispers into her hair.

"I made such a mess, Viv." She wraps him in her arms and squeezes him tightly.

"I know, honey. But it's gonna be okay." He backs off of her and wipes his nose with his sleeve like a child.

"What are you here for?" She smiles gently.

"Well, first I'm here to clean you up and help you feel like yourself. And then we're gonna drink. Because you need a little fun." He nods and takes the hand she offers him. She leads him up the stairs to the bathroom where she starts the shower. She turns and heads towards the door, but he grabs her elbow softly.

"Please stay."

"You want me to stay in here?"

"Please." She nods and sits on the lid of the toilet, turning away as he undresses and steps into the shower. He showers and then she hears the water turn off.

"Viv, honey, can you hand me a clean towel?"

"Of course!" She grabs a luxurious black towel and hands it to him. When he steps out of the shower, he has it wrapped around his waist, his hair fluffy and wet, water droplets glistening on his shoulders. Her mouth drops a little at how sexy he looks in this vulnerable state. It takes everything in her power not to rip the towel off and take him into the bedroom and...

******

"Viv?"

"Yes! What?"

"You're staring at me."

"Oh, God, I'm sorry." He smiles a little, enjoying the impact he's having on her. "You want me to blow dry your hair?"

"Yes." A relieved smile crosses his face and she seats him in the chair. As she dries it, he gives her instructions on how to do it, sounding more like himself. Next, she grabs the razor and shave soap.

"Whoa, hang on. Do you know what you're doing?" He asks, nervous.

"My stepdad broke his hand once when I was in high school. I can do this." He nods.

"Okay. I trust you." He leans his head back and she goes to work lathering up his face. She drags the razor gently over his skin, removing the hair. She's careful and meticulous and he revels in the feeling of being cared for so attentively.

Maybe she would be a good wife.

Once she finishes shaving him, he puts on a pair of fresh pajamas. Then, he tosses a pair at her.

"Get comfortable. Please."

"These are going to look ridiculous on me."

"Good." He smiles and she goes in the bathroom to change. He's thoroughly enjoying her company. He didn't realize how much he had missed her, but now she's here and his affection for her washes over him like a tidal wave. She comes out of the bathroom and sure enough, she looks silly in his giant pajamas. But something about seeing her in them makes him want to rip them off of her.

"Elvis."

"Yeah?"

"You're staring at me." He laughs for the first time in a week and gestures for her to follow him. On the way down to the tv room, he grabs the grocery bag from the foyer. It's true that he doesn't drink. But tonight? Tonight feels like a good night to break his rule.

Once they're settled on the couch in the tv room with a movie set up on the projector, he pulls the bottles out of the bag. She's got a bottle of vodka, a bottle of soda water, and a bottle of peach schnapps.

"Which one of these is for me?" He asks curiously. She laughs.

"I know you're a little bitch about alcohol, so I got you something that tastes good. The vodka is for me." He nods, smiling, and she goes to the bar, grabbing a couple of glasses. She makes them both drinks and they relax to watch the movie.

Two drinks later, Elvis is already pretty tipsy, laughing openly with his arm wrapped around her. Vivian does a couple of shots to try to catch up with him.

"Hey! I want one of those."

"No, Elvis, you really don't, baby." He snickers.

"You called me baby."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"No, I like it, honey. More pet names. Call me more pet names." She giggles, the shots finally starting to kick in.

"Baby. Honey. Sweetie. Lover boy." He laughs at the last one.

"You can't call me lover boy without being my lover, babydoll."

"Babydoll?!"

"You don't like it?" She makes another drink for each of them and Elvis throws his back quickly.

"Elvis! Slow down! I can't keep up."

"Come on, doll face, now who's being a little bitch?"

"Well, I definitely don't like little bitch." Elvis erupts in his big-joy laugh, leaning over to rest his head on her knee while he does. She finishes her drink and makes another for each of them.

"Which one do you like best, sweetheart?" He asks, swirling his drink in his glass.

"I'm not sure, babe. Which one do you like best?" She answers, taking a sip. He takes another long drink and then turns to look at her, his eyelids heavy.

"I like this, darlin'."

"The alcohol?"

"No- well, yes- but I like being here with you." All of a sudden he gets really serious. The memory of the conversation that didn't happen comes screaming back to him. He drains his glass and then sets it on the coffee table.

"What?" She looks at him inquisitively, her eyes glazed over with drunkenness.

"You 'member that conversation we were s'posed to have. 'Fore I left?" She finishes her drink and nods.

"Yeah?"

"I was just thinkin' 'bout it, that's all." His southern accent comes out so much stronger when he's been drinking and it makes Viv giggle.

"What?" He asks, a wide smile on his face.

"You just sound like a good ole country boy right now." She mimics his accent and he laughs loudly again.

"I am a good ole country boy." She's lying back against the corner of the couch, so he crawls up between her legs and she puts her hands on his cheeks.

"I know. I like it." She kisses the end of his nose. Her deep-ocean eyes look into his intensely. "I love it."

She leans in slowly, pressing her lips to his. He pulls away first, pressing his forehead into hers as he hovers above her.

"Viv." He whispers. Then he backs away, his eyes flicking between hers and then down to her pretty mouth. He leans in slowly, lips parted, capturing hers in a sensuous kiss. His tongue grazes hers so gently, as if asking for permission.

Then he dives in fully, never looking back.

******

When Elvis finally starts to wake up, he crinkles his nose and whimpers. The headache is already beginning behind his eyes and he's so thirsty he feels like he might die if he doesn't get some water soon. He feels movement on his chest and opens his eyes to a head full of dark hair. That's when he remembers: Vivian. His mind races as he tries to think through what might've happened last night. He kissed her, but that's the only thing his foggy brain can grab onto. His heart skips a beat as a thought crosses his mind and he lifts the covers a little to try to assess the situation.

They're both naked. He swallows deeply and looks up at the ceiling. Oh shit...

He feels her shift a little on his chest, her breasts pressing up against the side of his body. She groans and stretches and he knows he has to say something.

"Umm... Viv?"

"Yeah?" She groans again, obviously feeling the effects of her drinks last night.

"Are you wearing... anything?" Her eyes pop open and she sits up suddenly. When she realizes that this means he can see her chest, she lays back down quickly and starts to slink away from him under the covers.

"Oh, God. Oh no." She whines. He grabs her and pulls her back onto his chest.

"No. Don't leave."

"Elvis, I... we-"

"I know. But I don't want you to leave. Not yet." She relaxes a little against him.

"Do you remember anything?" He tries to force his mind to focus on last night. All he sees are flashes, him running his hand up her leg, the sounds she made when she climaxed, one moment of looking into her eyes while she was on top of him, his hand on her cheek.

"Just flashes. You?"

"No, just flashes for me too."

"I remember it being really good, though." She whispers her response.

"Me too..."

They lay together in silence for a while, Elvis's mind going crazy wondering what she's thinking. He goes back to the conversation that never happened. Does she love him? Could this actually work?

"Vivian, you know, we could finish our conversation now." She sits up and looks into his face, hers painted with a look of anguish.

"No, we can't."

"Why not?"

"Because the same reason you can't be with Ann Margaret is the same reason you can't be with me."

"Priscilla."

"Yes." He puts his hand on his forehead.

"Goddamnit. Man, I really screwed myself, didn't I?" She sighs deeply.

"Elvis, you told me once that she makes sense to you. Is that still true?"

"Yes, but-"

"Then there's your answer. I don't make sense to anyone. You should marry her." His heart breaks for Viv. He wants to tell her that it doesn't matter, that she does make sense to him, that even if she didn't he would love her. But he doesn't. He knows what the right thing to do is.

So he loosens his grip on her and she gets out of the bed. She finds her clothes from where she left them to change into his pajamas last night. He lays in the bed as she dresses, trying to keep himself from crying. Losing Ann Margaret was bad, but this is pure torture.

When she's fully put back together, she stands in the doorway just looking at him and he notices that she's crying and has been the whole time.

"Vivian..." He says it softly. Then, he gets out of bed and grabs a robe from a chair, wrapping it around himself. He walks to where she's standing and she collapses into his chest, sobbing. He holds her in his arms and kisses the top of her head. "I'm sorry."

She nods into him and then pulls back, wiping her face. He tries to catch her eyes but she won't look up at him. Without another word, she turns and walks out of the room, down the stairs, and through the front door, leaving him standing in the doorway. When he hears the front door latch, he falls to his knees and sobs.

Vivian is gone. He proposes to Priscilla in December of 1966.

******

Taglist:

@ccab @elvisfatass @elvisalltheway101 @aliypop @18lkpeters @dkayfixates @tacozebra051 @your-nanas-house @deniseinmn @joshuntildawn13 @lookingforrainbows @60svintage @littlehoneyposts @epthedream69 @louisejoy86 @rjmartin11 @from-memphis-with-love @deltafalax @jhoneybees @everythingelvispresley @returntopresley @atleastpleasetelephone @cinnamoroll-things @burnthheparaphilia

[wholesomefluffdaddy]

Wednesday's new court mandated therapist is having her keep a journal of her thoughts and feelings. Wednesday finds this to be a complete waste of time and decides instead to use it to record her observations of her unusual roommate Enid Sinclair. Wednesday POV.

——————————————

Entry 18

Current Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent 🌒

Today Enid suggested we head into Jericho for Christmas shopping. I informed her that this was unnecessary for me as I had already finished making my Yuletide gifts before the final month began. She looked a little taken aback but I was quick to clarify that it did not mean I wouldn't join her in town. I donned my jacket and took her hand in my own. She lit up again at once and immediately pulled me out of our dorm.

As we walked through the halls on our way down to the bus she asked me many questions about Yule. I had no qualms in educating her about its history, symbols, and traditions.

'Woah! So it's kind of like an old timey Christmas?' Was her response. I cannot describe the physical pain this caused me. 'Willa, are you okay?' She asked as we boarded the bus.

'Perhaps it would also be prudent to discuss the history of the holiday you celebrate as well.' I said, taking a calming breath as we sat down. I could tell that it would be a long trip to Jericho.

-YourFavoriteFruitBat is now livestreaming-

"What's up guys! YourFavoriteFruitBat here along with my girl GayMerGirl as we head into town! We're going to see how long I can stand in the local churches before I catch fire!"

"You're not seriously doing that are you?"

"Hey chat it looks like we've got a guest appearance by QBB - Queen Bee Barclay!"

"Don't call me that."

"So what are your plans for town today?"

"Well, I guess they now include staying away from the churches."

"Aw, come on Bianca don't be- Wait, chat's going crazy. Hold on. Oh shit! I guess we've also got an impromptu episode of Wenid Watch!"

"So this is still a thing?"

"Yeah, it's become even more popular over the past couple weeks. I remember when Yoko started filming them occasionally as a joke but now everyone is super invested."

"Like, their relationship?"

"Yup! It's the whole 'will they won't they' kind of thing. Except they're finally together now, I think."

"Shh! Quiet you two! This is a rare sighting of the two love bats outside of their nest!"

"-and it was the psychoactive component of the amanita muscaria, or fly agaric, that caused hallucinations, with the most common hallucination being that of flying reindeer."

"Wow! But wait, if people only hallucinated the reindeer flying then how did the Christmas Werewolf win the werewolf games?"

"The… what?"

"The werewolf games! How did the Christmas Werewolf win if the reindeer he ate didn't actually fly?"

"I am unaware of such a tale."

"You not know about the Christmas Werewolf? Ha! Quit joking!"

"This is no jest, cara mia."

"You know, the Christmas Werewolf."

"Mi amor, I am afraid that you repeating it does not give me any greater clarity."

"…You? You really haven't heard the story of the Christmas Werewolf?"

"No. I am woefully ignorant."

"…"

"Please enlighten me."

"Okay! So my dad always told the story just before the twelve days of Christmas began back when my brothers and I were just cubs-"

"Cubs?"

"You know, kid werewolves."

"Ah, I see. Continue."

"The Christmas Werewolf, okay so you know how werewolves remain wolfed out for the twelve days of Christmas right?"

"No..."

"Really? Okay, uh, there's a lot I'm going to need to cover then. Anyway, werewolves who have completed their first full wolf out stay wolfed out during the twelve days of Christmas. That's when we compete in the werewolf games."

"And what happens in these games?"

"Well, we test our strength and stuff, like running and hunting and jumping. There's also alcohol involved but that's mainly for the older werewolves. Anyway, so the story goes that a long time ago on a cold winter's night all the local werewolves gathered together for the werewolf games. Everyone got to play except for one little werewolf. None of the other werewolves would let him join in the games because they said he was too small and weak and could never hope to compete. The little werewolf was very sad but determined to prove them wrong."

"The other werewolves laughed and said they would let him join in the games if he could jump over the wall of a nearby castle. The little werewolf saw how tall the wall was and knew he could not jump it all by himself. He wandered off into the woods and that's when he saw it: Santa's reindeer. The little werewolf got an idea. If the reindeer could fly, maybe he could too if he ate one."

"That took a rather unexpected turn."

"So, he comes up with this whole big plan to catch one of the reindeer. Long story short he succeeds and eats one of the reindeer and goes back to the other werewolves. Anyway, he wins because he can jump super high now and gets crowned the Christmas Werewolf."

"And how did Santa respond to the death of one of his reindeer?"

"Well, I mean, that's why Santa doesn't deliver presents to werewolves. And why we can't enjoy hot chocolate at Christmas. And also why his reindeer wear silver bells, so werewolves never eat his reindeer again."

"That… makes sense."

"I know right? But if the flying reindeer were hallucinations, how did the Christmas werewolf make the jump?"

"I would suppose that with this werewolf being quite clever he found some alternative way to clear that castle wall."

"I guess."

"Enid, if the character of Saint Nicholas refuses to bring gifts to werewolves why have you hung stockings?"

"Oh! Those aren't for Santa! It's for the Christmas werewolf to leave dried venison. It's symbolic of the meat of the flying reindeer."

"Why stockings?"

"Well, you can't wear stockings when you're wolfed out, silly. That's why he puts it in there."

"Of course. And the tree?"

"Werewolf Christmases are mostly spent outside, since almost everyone is wolfed out. So we have two trees that are decorated the same. One inside for the cubs that haven't wolfed out and one outside for everyone else. You can find your family by the tree outside that is decorated like the one inside."

"There appears to be much I do not know about werewolf Christmas."

"I don't know. I think they're mostly the same. I mean, you spend time with family and people you care about, you give gifts, and you compete to see who is the strongest."

"Must one be a werewolf to partake in these games?"

"Uh, technically no but they are very challenging if you aren't."

"What is the prize of winning said games?"

"Well, you get to be the Christmas Werewolf."

"And what does that entail?"

"You get first pick when it comes to meals, everyone has to listen to you, you get bragging rights, and you hunt the Christmas reindeer so you can put venison in everyone's stockings."

"Interesting. Tell me the games again."

"Willa? You're not- you're not thinking of competing are you?"

"Would it be inappropriate for me to?"

"No but, you're not, you're kinda-"

"Yes?"

"You're small."

"Is the story you told me not about the small and clever overcoming brute strength?"

"Yes but Willa- My family is super competitive."

"As am I, querida."

"Willa no."

"I am merely curious, mi loba."

"Well chat? What do you think? Do you think Wednesday Addams has what it takes to compete in the werewolf games?"

"I worry for the werewolves to be honest."

"Bianca's got the spirit! I'm adding a poll down in chat. Chat, do you think Wednesday has a chance? I guess we'll have to wait till after winter break to find out!"

-YourFavoriteFruitBat has ended the livestream-

[blacklegsanjiii]

Some hcs about ASL x S! Of course, if you don't mind

• Even if the ASL brothers loved food, I think they just noticed how hard cooking was after seeing Sanji cook. How some recipes need hours and hours, how even a little mistake can spoil all the food, how that don't matter how good you are cooking, accidents still happen and Sanji end up with some cuts and burns. Sometimes Sanji even needing to put bandages in his hands.

• I believe most times ASL and Garp go at Baratie, the restaurant is closed or Zeff closes it when they arrive. So they never saw all the chaos that Baratie is on common days. I can perfectly see a time where the restaurant docks at Foosha and ASL go see their boyfriend, but Baratie is open and he's working. So they sit and don't have other option than just wait. It's crazy for them how Sanji manages to go between being a waiter and a cook, take down various customer orders and remember what food go at what table, carry twenty-odd dishes at once, and still having just a fifteen minutes break.

• This hc is more for Fem!Sanji, but I believe that Sanji was taught that she should be a lady, always with a smile and sweet personality. And while she IS this way naturally, she isn't just this. So I believe that, after Germa, she would still hide half of herself as a way to protect her. The more you knows her, the more she shows all of her. And I can see Sanji freely acting like a little shit while with ASL because she trusts them, even more after dating. They don't notice this until someone point this, maybe Makino, and after noticing they just start to help her show who she is in full.

ASL x S has taken over this blog in veins similar to when Warlord!Sanji first happened which is fine by me. Get this man some love!

I feel like if Sanji was dating them when he was learning how to butcher things they would see him constantly with bandages on his hands. Burns from morons not telling him hot pans as well as his own dumb mistakes. Sanji shows them some basic recipes and how to cook more effectively on a fire and burning himself. He stares dejectedly at the fire and with an 'et tu, brute' attitude as he continues on like nothing bad happened. Sanji fucks something up and sighs as he apologizes at the inedibility of it but his boyfriends scarf it down regardless. Sanji is used to his boyfriends forgoing taste for edibility on more than one occasion unless Sanji absolutely demands they do not eat something for fear of poisoning them all.

One time The Baratie is docked on Foosha with normal business hours, not closing due to the boyfriends or Garp coming to eat, ASL go to surprise their boyfriend but instead find an absolute shitshow of a rush. Waiters are scrambling and there's a lot of yelling from the back kitchen and those who know ASL tell them they don't have time for them today. Sanji will be out if he's awake after close. There's just too much happening and not enough staff and they're fucking swamped. Then Sanji joins in on waiting tables because there's not enough waiters and he's going back and forth in a chef coat from waiting tables to cooking and he's so loud. The way he yells 'behind', 'to your left/right' 'hot' with a projection they've only ever heard from Garp of all people is rattling. They sit and watch through the rush until close and join in on cleaning up, mostly Sabo makes Ace and Luffy join in because they've never cleaned a day in their life but the staff is grateful and Zeff does make them something to eat with the staff of Baratie. Of course everyone is so wiped out that Ace carries Sanji to his room and he's out before they're even halfway there. Sabo and Ace are debating on getting Sanji changed when Luffy just lays on top of him and falls asleep making it impossible to change their boyfriend, so of course they pile on top as well.

Okay now Fem!Sanji being a shit. This has to be accurate. Being raised a princess and then as Zeff's daughter has to make perfectly lady like but also...look at the men she's around on the Baratie. She's pulled some shit and always gets away with it because she's Zeff's darling daughter, she would never do anything like choke Patty with his own socks, never! ASL know what she's like though, she's a gremlin like them, not as feral but definitely a gremlin. Makino has definitely seen the attitude shift from when Zeff is gone and she's free and clear to not have to worry about getting in trouble for getting dirty and acting like a child. She's free with them. Makino probably brings it up to them at some point, the way Sanji morphs from Zeff's princess to jungle gremlin like them, she's absolutely fond of the girl and it's clear in her voice, but they pay closer attention after that, or at least try to. Sanji doesn't like getting dirty or bugs but she loves climbing and swimming in the river and doing dumb shit with her boyfriends. Maybe they try to get her to be more brash and open, but she's still theirs. Always will be.

[jpitha]

Between the Black and Grey 45

First / Previous / Next

The scream rang through the frigate. Northern ran down the hall and burst into Fen's room where she found her sitting up panting, covered in sweat.

"What is it? What happened?"

"T-The Nanites. They spoke to me." Fen tried to control her breathing, taking huge breaths and holding them for a moment, releasing them through her nose. "They said they're not going to devour our dimension, but they need to Gates to help search for a different one to devour."

"Devour?"

"They are a distributed intelligence inside the Nanites. They consume everything to make more of themselves. They said their own dimension was not like ours - fewer stars and planets - and they found a white hole to power themselves and the Gates, but now they need more energy." Fen continued to try and control her breathing, but she started panting instead. "Northern" she gasped.

Northern grabbed Fen and hugged her tightly. As she held her, Fen's breathing slowly recovered and tears started flowing down her cheeks. "What are we going to do?"

"The first thing we're going to do-" As she stood, Fen thought for a moment that Northern seemed taller. She exuded confidence that made Fen feel like she could fix things. "-is get out of here. No way we can stay here Helen and the Empire. The second thing we're going to do is go find Gord."

"But we don't know where he is."

"I've got an idea." Northern flashed a grin and winked as she strode out of the room. Fen sighed and flopped back onto the bed.

"Stormy! If you're not connected up to the ship, it's time. We're going.

"Going where, Northern?" Stormy's voice came from the PA.

"Tell you when we're out of here. Are we still on the Dreadnought's umbilical?" Northern sat in the center seat on the Command deck. Her fingers danced over the panels built into the arms of the chair. All over the ship, there were sounds of activity as the reactor came back online and other systems started to spin up.

"We are. I'm spoofing their sensors right now, so long as you keep the running lights off they won't know we're running hot until they come up to the airlock."

"Ideally, I want to be gone before they even know we left. What time is it on the ship?"

"Hour or so before lunch."

"Shit. That means Helen will probably be coming by soon."

"Speak of the devil-" Stormy took over one of the large screens on the command deck, and changed the view to an external camera. Helen Raaden was entering the hangar right then, flanked by a brace of guards, all armed with rifles. "Odd she should come armed like that on her own ship, isn't it?"

"Not if she wasn't going to let our friend have any chance of making her own decision." Northern tapped more on her pads, and the whining whirr of the slug thrower spinning out was heard. On the screen, Northern watched them all stop moving suddenly and the guards raise their rifles as they surrounded Helen.

"After careful consideration, we have decided to reject your offer, 'Admiral' Helen Raaden." Stormy said over the PA. "We are leaving."

Helen's eyes could melt a ship's hull. She started shouting at the guards and three of them peeled off and ran back the way they came while some of them opened fire on Stormy. The rounds plinking off the hull sounded like hail.

"Northern! They're bringing in the big guns. Unless we do something we're holed." Stormy's camera flicked, and Northern saw a large slug thrower unfolding from the ceiling of the hangar and swung towards them, it's double barrel staring at them menacingly.

"Shit shit shit!" Northern got up from her seat and ran over to a station in front of her. She reached deep underneath the workstation and manipulated a lever. A hooting, brassy alarm started up all over the ship and a binnacle rose out of the floor in front of the commander's seat. She ran back and as she sat, pedals unfolded and her seat belted her in tightly. "Stormy! You concentrate on countermeasures, I'm going to fly us out."

"You're putting me on manual? I knew you were odd Northern Lights, but I had no idea you took complete leave of your senses!"

"You worry about those slug throwers, Stormy Days, I'll worry about getting us out of the hangar in once piece." Northern grasped the two control sticks that stuck out from near the top of the binnacle and placed her feet on the pedals. With a twist of thrusters, Stormy lifted off the deck and started to slide slowly, wobbling slightly.

As she did so, nobody noticed Helen, but the cameras recorded it. As she stood there, shouting and ordering people around, the dust and debris in the hangar swirled around moving towards her. While she stood there, it formed up behind her making a set of gossamer wings that began to glow slightly.

Fen sat up sharply. She started to move awkwardly, in fits and starts, as if her limbs weren't entirely her own to control.

We tried to talk you into this Fen. We gave you every opportunity to go along with it. We would have given you anything you wanted, let you rule however you sought fit. But, you leave us no choice. You are Empress and you will rule.

"N-No." Fen's voice sounded weak, blurry. "S-stop. I don't want to do this."

The time for bargaining has long passed.

As the thrusters kicked in, Fen wobbled. Ship's gravity took over, and things were smooth quickly enough, but the Nanites noticed the change.

Too soon! We have to leave now.

Fen broke into a stiff legged run, and took off towards the airlock.

Back on the command deck, Northern struggled to control the ship while Stormy handled point defense. It seemed like for every gun they shot at, two more appeared. "Northern this isn't working. I'm going to try and blow a hole and get us out of here!"

"You're welcome to give it a shot Stormy, I'm out of ideas."

"Uh, Northern?" Zhe's head lifted from the console she was sitting at. "What about the wormhole generator?"

"What about it, Zhe? Is that broken now too?"

"No, but why don't we use it?"

"Inside the hangar? That's madness!"

"Why?"

"Because it would severely damage the-" Northern stopped and listened to what she was saying. "It would damage Helen's ship and help prevent them from chasing after us! Zhe, you're brilliant! Stormy, compute a link out of here. Doesn't matter where, we can link again once we're safe."

"On it Northern. Computing solution now."

Fen's body reached the airlock. As the ship was maneuvering, it was locked. Shaking, her hand went up to the unlock pad and she leaned in, using her shoulder to push hard on the pad. After a moment, the light turned green and both doors snapped open.

The noise was intense. The thrusters were loud enough on their own, but that combined with the chatter of the guns and the movement of the air and shouts from the crew made hearing anything impossible. Bending her knees down low to build energy, Fen sprang out of the airlock.

"Northern! I have a solution. Just let me know when to link."

"Do it now, Stormy!"

"Linking away in 3... 2..." Stormy gasped. "Northern! The ventral airlock! It's-"

As the wormhole opened and surrounded Stormy Days, the ship wasn't the only thing that linked away. The air, dust, floor of the hangar, some of the side plates also linked away. Everyone in the hanger was dazzled by the wormhole, and then deafened as the air stolen by Stormy Days rushed back in.

Everyone was knocked over by the force except Helen. If anyone was watching, they would have seen something like her wings swing in front of her to direct the force around her. As air rushed into the hangar to replace what Stormy had taken, sound returned to the large room. There were sirens and klaxons and other alarms sounding all at once.

Helen clicked her comm. "Silence those alarms. We know where the damage is. Get fire teams down to the hangar and run diagnostics on the reactors. I know they're under us. I need Medical too, we have injured. Bring stretchers."

"Yes, Admiral!" The voice on the other end was cool and professional. Helen nodded to herself. She tried to make sure she surrounded herself with cool and professional people. Ignoring her guards who were coming back to consciousness slowly, she strode over to the body laying on the floor near the crater left by Stormy's departure. She kneeled down. "Fen."

Fen's body rustled and she moaned and tried to push herself upright.

"Don't move Fen. I'm getting medical down here. We'll make sure you're all right."

"W-wha-"

"Shhhhh, shhhh." Helen stroked Fen's hair. It even felt like Melody's. She smiled to herself. Everything was coming together. Soon enough, they would be back on track. "We're going to make sure you're not injured, but the Nanites should have taken the majority of the impact for you. You'll be good as new in a few days, Empress."

[therabbitthatpostthings]

My knowledge of Vtubers starts and stops with Kizuna Ai. The only reason I know of most big VTubers is because I genuinely am fascinated in the way model rigging works and because two singers I followed YEARS ago are now Vtubers (AmaLee and Bao The Whale)

With that being said, watching Nijisanji make the biggest PR mistake of their life over the past week has been the funniest shit ever. Like GODDAMN. I have learned more about the financial instability of this one company in three days than I ever have since the dawn of Vtubers. I have never been interested Vtubers before (aside from the two mentioned above cause I watched them when I was like 14), this situation alone has made me want to consume so much VTuber material.

Anyway good luck and great wishes on Doki's come back to the internet.

[jlf23tumble]

I'm really trying to understand. I know Joshua does take good pics but some of his pics are awful and they still get so much praise. I'm seeing comments "I know the pic is blurry but it fits Louis' tour aesthetics". Seriously? Is that the excuse now? "This pic looks like shit but it fits Louis' tour aesthetics". Since that pic Harry posted on IG that was super super blurry, which I think he was trying to make a point with. That fans don't control him. I thought Lloyd's pics have got better since. They show more of the audience. I really like his recent pics that show Harry and the audience. They give a vintage postcard kind of feel. Old school. But he's still being trashed as ever. Sometimes I'll see a pic and think... that's not that bad so surely they won't be trashing that. But they will be, always are. He can't do any right. But Joshua can't do any wrong. I think it could be partly because Joshua talks to the fans on twitter. So they feel 'closer' to him. They're still incredibly bitter about the iHeart? tour photography award going to Lloyd, while also saying that it means nothing. If it means nothing then why still so bitter? Why the desperate push to vote for Joshua? They say that Lloyd only won the award because of Harries. Well yes. If Joshua won the award it would be because of Louies and Larries. That's how fan voted awards go. If anyone does like Lloyd's pics they get insulted for having bad taste. They really despise Lloyd and they just don't stop complaining about him. Why is it always like this? That everyone Harry works with is hated by the fandom and everyone Louis works with is loved?

I'm sitting here, nodding my head as I read this like a goddamned kitsch toy dog on the dashboard of someone's bitchin' Camaro because yeah, YEAH. I have some thoughts about it that I'm sure I'm not all that articulate about, so I'll take it to the tags and let your ask just shine up here, uninterrupted yet fully appreciated

[langernameohnebedeutung]

Lae'zel's character and her entire situation at the beginning of the game becomes so much more funny when you find out she's 22. It makes so much sense. Imagine you're 22 and you're exposed to this dangerous toxin or chemical or something - but not to worry, you learnt that this can be easily fixed, you just need to dial 911 real quick. Common knowledge. Everyone knows that. You learnt that in kindergarten, it's up there with fire alarm drills.

But the people you're stuck with have no concept of modern medicine and when you say "let's go to the hospital" they will say shit like "i think they kill people at the hospital" and "we should ask this swamp lady" or "this guy over there told me about this homoeopathic healer kind of guy but he got abducted" or "this random bard wants to help" and "I'm not going to dial 911 because I don't want the government to know my home address" or "maybe we should consider a deal with Satan". And then a bunch of them KEEP consuming the chemical because it makes them "stronger". One guy might explode for unrelated reasons. You have a few days before this situation is getting critical and suddenly they're solving crime and doing general charity for the community.

And FOR SOME REASON you still try to help these idiots and you STILL want to help them get the cure even though they all keep insisting the "doctors" at the "hospital" might try to "kill them" and they don't have insurance. And you keep telling them to just. go. to. the. hospital. before the time runs out and you all die very horribly of a very treatable condition.

And also you're 22 in a foreign country and you're responsible for shepherding this gaggle of idiots who are all ranging anywhere from 24 to 240 years old.

[fazcinatingblog]

Oh yeah I have to fight and beg and plead with my boss tomorrow to not double the invoices for the BAS's just because the timesheet says

[midnightarcheress]

stress-relief

husband!Simon helping his wife!reader with her stress <3 cw: nsfw. mdni. fem reader, masturbation, squirting, a lil overstim.

you shuffle through the bag to find the keys to your home, only to drop it the minute you raise it to unlock the door. great. it’s one of those days where everything goes wrong, and you want nothing more than to shut out the world and curl up in bed, silently praying for the next one to be better. 

you pick up the keys from the doormat and swing open the door of your flat, hoping that the familiar scent flooding your lungs will help you ground yourself back to a more serene state. tossing your coat and bag aside, your gaze falls on the tall man quietly reading on the sofa, sweetly mouthing a “welcome back, love.” that you dismiss with a grunt, stomping your way to the bedroom.

‘uh-oh.’ Simon thinks, siren already buzzing and red light blinking in his brain, making him pull up to his feet at god-speed and quickly follow you to your shared room, being met with your clothes scattered around and the sound of running water coming from the bathroom. he promptly puts away your discarded attire and sits on the edge of the bed, patiently waiting for you.

you stay in the shower for some good thirty minutes, allowing the water to wash away your stress as you massage your scalp. the weight finally falls from your shoulders and flows down the drain, leaving you alone with the tiredness that’s been brewing in your tense muscles since you stepped out of the house. with a long, weary sigh, you drape the towel around your body and walk out the bathroom, tiny droplets cascading from your hair to your chest, descending on the swell of your breasts and stirring your husband’s cock in his pants.

“gonna tell me wha’ got you so cranky, dove?” he asks with the slightest of teasing, knowing he’s staggering on the thin line of your temper.

“‘m sorry, jus’ a hard day.” you mutter sheepishly, turning to get some well-deserving comfy clothes on the dresser

“c’mere,” you barely have time to react before Simon pulls you by the wrist onto the bed, positioning your body between his legs as he rests on the headboard, “talk to me, lovie.”

his hands brush your arms delicately, fingers running up and down your skin as you start addressing the misfortunes of your day. how a jerk cut you off in traffic, how a client screamed at you on the phone after you explained it wasn’t possible to fulfill his request, how your long awaited sweet treat after lunch fell straight to the floor, how your mother called just to raise hell at you for not visiting enough, how your boss scolded you for a mistake that wasn’t even your fault.

“hm, she said tha’?” he murmurs, massaging the knots on your shoulders and slowly drifting his hands downwards, opening up the lightly damp towel that’s clinging to your frame as you ramble. his rough, calloused skin finds its way to your soft tits, gently kneading the fat while his lips plant small kisses all over your neck.

“i swear that woman’s out to get me, don't know how i haven’t been fired yet.”

“she knows tha’ place would fall apart without ya, doll. you’re the only one with a brain there,” he coos sweetly in your ear, fingers traveling down your stomach and reaching your mound, making your breath hitch in your throat. Simon smirks at your reaction, feeling your head tipping back to rest on his shoulder and your still wet hair soaking his shirt, “let me help you decompress, eh?”

you, too tired to resist the offer, let him spread your legs with ease, compliant to the touch of your loving husband. his middle finger smears the hasty arousal leaking from your cunt through your slit, softly caressing your folds as you melt into his arms. “so wet f’me, love.” he chuckles, slightly rubbing your clit as you hum.

his moves are tame, gradually pooling the warmth in your belly, taking his time to shape your tension until it’s the right moment to set you free. his finger toys with your entrance before sliding in, feeling the familiar walls of your cunt clenching around it, causing you to breathe heavily at just the beginning.

“you like tha’?” he whispers, introducing another finger on your tight hole as you turn to bury your face on his neck, mewling with pleasure and pain while he stretches you, digits hitting all the right spots. by the time he speeds up the thrusting, your moans are erratic, gasped, barely leaving your throat as you grasp his forearm in a desperate attempt to ground yourself, even with your brain reaching the fucked-out point by a simple touch.

his thumb lazily strokes your swollen nub as he continues to be knuckles-deep inside of your velvety walls, curling his fingers just enough to earn a squeal out of you. the coil on your lower stomach tightens, fibers threatening to snap at any second as Simon murmurs sugary praises in your ears whilst nipping the skin where your neck meets your shoulder, the love bite’s stings only intensifying the pleasure coursing through your bloodstream.

“Simon, ’m gonna-” you don’t even have the energy to complete your sentence before your juices flood on his hand, the god’s nectar gushing from your pussy and dripping from his wrist onto the long forgotten towel, as he bullies your clit to overstimulation. you cry out his name like a prayer, begging whatever higher power out in the universe to let you keep that sensation forever.

“looks like someone really needed tha’,” he laughs and you feel the deep rumbling from his chest on your naked back, only driving you closer to the edge as your legs convulse at the overwhelming thrill of your nervous system. your frantic moans echo in the room when Simon raises his free hand to your nipple, rolling the hardened tip between his thumb and index, painting twinkling stars in the ceiling, the scintillation being too much to keep your vision clear. “think ya got another one f’me, princess?” 

he doesn’t wait for your answer; he knows how to treat his precious wife and can cite by heart the prescription to get you to sleep better than any pill would. tears prickle in the corner of your eyes when he starts again, just barely giving you time to recover from the near out-of-body experience. 

his new rhythm is harsh, pulling your thighs - fully covered in slick and arousal - over his to keep you spread open, and fiercely pounding two digits inside you. you squirm and press yourself harder against his broad chest, babbling incoherently as he pumps his thick and scarred fingers somehow even deeper than before. 

“Si, ‘s too much, i can’t-” you choke out, streams rolling down your cheeks as he builds another orgasm out of you. half-lidded eyes meet his hazel irises in a lustful gaze, pleading in agony for another release before your body gives out.

it doesn’t take much before a jolt of electricity tingle beneath your skin and makes you cum, getting you blissfully drunk by finger-fucking only while your peak ripple through your core. your hands sternly grip on the sheets under your limp body, the frenzy running its way through every corner of your being, clouding your vision and leaving you in a divine peaceful haze.

your limbs twitch slightly as you come down from your high, Simon holding you tight in his burly arms and pressing kisses on your pretty face. “you did so good, lovie,” he praises, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your belly, “could’ve given ya s’much more but your eyes are so droopy already,” his quiet laugh almost lull you to sleep right there and then, “feeling better?”

you nod, eyes tempting to close as the fatigue washes over you, weariness creeping up your mind after a hell of a day and a celestial end to it. “thank you, Si.” you mumble with nothing but affection in your voice, utterly elated by the sight of your devoted husband cradling you. 

“anything for ya, my wife.”

just a little something i thought of while procrastinating my other works lol

[cafterdark]

There's something about gradual mind breaking that drives me wild.

Imagine this. Your life is shit, you're stuck ina deadend cubical job. 9-5 bullshit galore. One day, you're assigned to train a new coworker. She's pretty, way above your league. And yet she's kind. She compliments you and your skills honed to perfection working these bullshit shifts. But still, she's way prettier than you so you feel awkward even acknowledging them.

The two of you have lunch together. The two of you were talking, and she was still complimenting you for some reason. About how pretty your hair is or how cute your smile looks. You can't even comprehend looking anything but shit. She pouts and fiddles with her phone a bit. Then she asks you to watch a video. Suddenly you're back at work. When did the break end? No matter.

She tells you how pretty your eyes were. You smile because good girls accept compliments and tell her how gorgeous her lips are because good girls are honest. The rest of the day the two of you compliment each other.

It's beenmonth since then and both of you just keep complimenting each other. Sure, your compliments are getting kind of weird. You don't know when you started calling her Mistress as a joke, but it's hard to stop now. But she tells you that it's normal for good girls to call their Mistress Mistress so you keep doing it anyway. Besides, her compliments are getting weirder too. Mistress has made it a habit to pin you to a wall before telling you them. Then she just tells you how submissive and docile you are. She kisses you a lot now. Good girls deserve to be kissed by their Mistress ofc, so you don't complain.

Work itself is harder now. You just can't keep up like you used to. You're just so horny and Mistress doesn't help. You know that good girls are horny messes, but it's so aggravating. The tight clothes that show off so much don't help, but good girls are required to wear them so what can you do? Mistress has to pick up a lot of your slack, but she doesn't seem to mind. And besides good girls let Mistress do the work for them.

Breaks are great. Mistress shows you another video and you feel so good and good girls deserve to feel good. You feel so good that you don't remember what happens during them. You've started finding bruises and bite marks on your skin after them, though you don't know why. You don't care because good girls need to be marked. For the rest of the shift, she keeps touching you and teasing. By the end you can barely stand.

At the clock terminal, Mistress pins you to the wall and makes out with you before leaving. You're frozen by lust for several minutes before stumbling to your car.

Three months in and things are now really weird. You can't tell why anymore. Your head feels like cotton most of the time. You ask Mistress why everything feels so weird, because good girls always ask Mistress for help. She gives you some pets and kisses you, reminding you that dumb puppies don't think. Your boss threatens to fire you because of poor performance, but it's not your fault you're a dumb puppy. Everyone knows that dumb puppies don't work. Dumb puppies are to be submissive and docile. Mistress does most of the work, she's so good at it that she's up for promotion.

Breaks are so fun. Mistress shows you another video. When you wake up, you feel sooooooo good. Like all the energy built up during the morning was just released. Mistress cleans you up and then she starts working again while you heel. Then when you clock out, Mistress attaches a leash to your collar and gives you a walkies home. The walkies home is the best part.

Six months in and life is perfect. You don't work anymore and that's okay. Dumb puppies don't work anyway. You and Mistress live together at her place. You sleep in your cage and if you're a really good puppy, Mistress lets you sleep at the foot of her bed. The best time is when Mistress works. She works at home now. Your job is to be adorable by sleeping in a dog bed under her desk. Well, that and pleasure her, because a dumb puppy's only role is to be her Mistress's fucktoy.

During lunch Mistress fills your bowl with kibble and it tastes amazing. She doesn't show you videos anymore. She says you're perfect now. You don't understand what she means but it doesn't matter. Dumb puppies don't think after all.

After Mistress finishes working, she takes you on walkies and plays with you. It's so fun and nice and amazing. And if you're a really good girl, the best puppy in the whole world, she'll let you sleep in the bed with her. Your life is amazing.

[dark-lord-tom-returns]

So I'm reading Witches Abroad and the first time we see Granny use magic is in Desiderata's cottage. Desiderata (deceased) was a big proponent of everyday magic. She was also quite blind. So when Granny and Nanny check on her cottage and definitely are not looking for her wand, there are no matches for the fireplace.

Granny doesn't like everyday magic. She says so. She even tells Nanny that if they found the wand she wouldn't use it, emphatically. She doesn't like the habit. But she's annoyed and wants her tea and needs a fire for that. So she uses magic.

But then she sees the mirror. And the face looking back isn't hers but Lilith's. Heres a quote about Granny:

"Very few people in the world had more self-control than Granny Weatherwax. It was as rigid as a bar of cast iron. And about as flexible."

And she smashes the mirror immediately and without hesitation.

Now we don't know who Lilith is to Granny at this point but upon reread this is a particularly interesting passage. By the end of the book we know Lilith is "the bad witch" and because she is Granny "had to be the good one".

Granny hates the fact she has to be the good one. She knows that if she was the bad one she'd be the most terrifying witch the Disc has ever seen. But she has to be the good one. That's her responsibility since Lilith turned out bad. She has to be good and she has to be responsible, especially since she has the power to be so evil and do so much damage if she ever lost control.

And I think that's why Granny smashes the mirror right then. She was annoyed at the lack of matches, she wanted tea, she used magic to get it. And that's not responsible witchcraft in her mind. So when she find Lilith looking at her through the mirror, she sees the person that forced her to have that self control. That made Granny Weatherwax a good witch when she wanted to be the bad one. And that hurt her.

This is also interesting when you consider Sam Vimes relationship with alcohol. Vimes used alcohol as a way to deal with a feeling of helplessness and lack of control. That addiction numbed the emotional pain and he had to be so careful in later books not to fall back into that habit.

Granny is the opposite. Her power is, maybe not addictive, but something she takes immense pride in. She wants to use it, she became the most powerful witch (not the most talented, that's Nanny) through hard work and dedication. But she can't use it because that wouldn't be responsible. Because everytime she uses it, it becomes a little easier to justify using a little more until she's using it for everything. Or anything. And she can't because she has to be the good one.

How much self control must that take? Granny spent her entire life becoming the best at what she does. Decades of mastering her craft and when she reaches the top she had to essentially stop. To put it aside and only use it in the most responsible way possible because if she slips, it's a long long way to the bottom.

Cast iron indeed.

[tinycoffeeroom]

café de paris | max verstappen

face claim: none ᡣ𐭩

request: here !

a/n: all french / dutch is google translated blame them if it's wrong! race order is completely random here !

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

📍café de paris, monaco

liked by bffstagram, friend1 and 294 others

y/nstagram me 🤝 café de paris

bffstagram bro those croissants look Fire ↳ y/nstagram my main source of sustenance in these hard monaco streets!

friend1 i have yet to see evidence of you shaking ass on a yacht miss y/n!! ↳ bffstagram so real... we're meant to be living vicariously through you!!! ↳ y/nstagram student finance doesn't stretch to yacht ass shaking, i can barely afford my daily caffeine fix 😭

friend2 oui oui hon baguette how is france? ↳ y/nstagram never let a monagesque hear you say that,,, bro i can't fight ↳ friend2 🫡 ... how is monaco?* ↳ y/nstagram 🫡 it's good!! def happy i chose here over france, even if my wallet doesn't agree 😭 ↳ friend2 we feeling fluent yet? ↳ y/nstagram oh god no, the other day this poor old lady tried explaining how to find the art museum to me and i just stared at her like 😶

friend3 spotted any f1 hotties yet? i hear they all camp out in monaco 👀 ↳ y/nstagram considering i have never watched a Single f1 race i couldn't tell you HAHAH i'm sure they're around here somewhere though ↳ friend3 dude i told you to brush up on f1 😭 how am i supposed to come visit you and have a meet cute with mr lando norris if you don't do your RESEARCH ↳ y/nstagram damn i see how it is,,, using me to get to your vroom vroom men,,,

3 weeks later

📍café de paris, monaco

👤 alexandrasaintmleux liked by bffstagram, alexandrasaintmleux and 270 others

y/nstagram finally found someone else to join my café de paris obsession 🥐

bffstagram next bff sweetie run while you can... ↳ y/nstagram stop scaring the pretty bitches off damn 😔 ↳ alexandrasaintmleux bffstagram she won't let me leave 😭 ↳ y/nstagram i deserve better friends ↳ bffstagram you couldn't live without us xx ♥️ y/nstagram

alexandrasaintmleux la prochaine fois, nous irons au casino ! (next time, we go to the casino!) ↳ y/nstagram finance étudiante a dit non (student finance said no) ↳ alexandrasaintmleux 😔 s'il tu plait... pour moi? 🥺 (please... for me?) ↳ y/nstagram pray for my wallet guys...

friend3 wdym you just casually befriended The Alexandra Saint Mleux??? ↳ y/nstagram i thought her skirt was pretty and had no idea she was like famous 😭 then we just kept running into each other !! ↳ friend3 i need to fly out to monaco damn you can't even see her in the pic but ik she looked So pretty... ↳ alexandrasaintmleux i like your friends y/n :p ↳ y/nstagram just wait til you see them drunk,,,

📍 jimmy'z, monaco

👤 alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris liked by alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris and 2,962 others

y/nstagram started the night in a night club and ended on a yacht,,, just monaco things (apparently) 🛥️

friend3 y/n if you don't answer my texts RIGHT NOW !!!! ↳ y/nstagram 😉 any reason ml? ↳ friend3 i'm gonna swim to monaco and bite chunks out of your ankles what the FUCK ??? when were you gonna tell me you were just casually hanging with [REDACTED] ↳ landonorris i'm guessing i'm redacted? 😎 ↳ friend3 i need to go lie down ↳ y/nstagram landonorris dude 😭 ↳ landonorris was it something i said? 😉

alexandrasaintmleux meilleure amie 💗 (best friend) ↳ y/nstagram merci de m'avoir invitée ! je t'aime ! (thank you for inviting me! love you!)

maxverstappen1 was lovely meeting you last night schat x ↳ y/nstagram you too max! don't forget to send me those pics of the kids! x ↳ bffstagram kids? ↳ y/nstagram his cats! jimmy and sassy! 🐱❤️🐱 ↳ bffstagram your knack for finding cat people never fails to impress me ♥️ y/nstagram

danielricciardo dude my liver actually hurts... ↳ y/nstagram hey you're the one who suggested a drinking contest ↳ danielricciardo yeah because i normally WIN you freak ↳ y/nstagram i'm a broke uni student, my drink of choice is normally vodka so cheap it's legally paint stripper

georgerussell63 carmen's phone died but she said to remind you about brunch today ↳ y/nstagram on it!! alex is gonna come round and bring me 😊

👤 maxverstappen1 liked by maxverstappen1, bffstagram and 2,938 others

y/nstagram met some VIC's (very important cats) today! 🐱 also f's in chat for my café de paris 😔

bffstagram f ↳ danielricciardo f ↳ georgerussell63 f ↳ landonorris f ↳ carmenmmundt f ↳ alexandrasaintmleux f ↳ maxverstappen1 f

friend3 babies!! the second pic oh i could cry ↳ y/nstagram she slept there for like 3 hours 😭 managed to actually sit through a whole gp though so a wins a win! ↳ friend3 y/n watching f1?? who is she?? ↳ y/nstagram their dad forced me 💔 ↳ maxverstappen1 um who cheered so loud when i won that she woke poor sassy up?? ↳ y/nstagram 🤐

charles_leclerc i didn't know café de paris do takeout? ↳ maxverstappen1 they do if you're me :) ↳ y/nstagram the only reason i'm considering keeping him around 😉 ↳ alexandrasaintmleux charles_leclerc and why have you never used your influence to get ME takeout café de paris "prince of monaco" ↳ charles_leclerc look what you've done... y/nstagram ♥️ y/nstagram

fan they're definitely max's cats but who is she? ↳ fan she knows alexandra so maybe they're in the same friendship group??

3 months later

liked by maxverstappen1, bffstagram and 308 others

y/nstagram working hard or hardly working 🌸

alexandrasaintmleux quand avez-vous passé votre examen ? (when's your exam?) ↳ y/nstagram lundi prochain,,, mon ami du café me manque 😔 (next monday,,, missing my cafe friend) ↳ alexandrasaintmleux nous fêterons cela quand tu auras terminé 💗 (we'll celebrate when you're finished)

bffstagram the red bulls... i wait 3 years white man does it in one week ♥️ maxverstappen1 ↳ y/nstagram hey! made him wait at least 2 months :p

friend3 the f1 book.. one of us one of us!! ↳ y/nstagram apparently i can't keep saying "the one with the red cow on it" when talking about his car,,, ↳ maxverstappen1 its a bull... literally a red bull... ↳ y/nstagram blah blah blah it's red and goes moo ↳ maxverstappen1 everyday i wake up to such disrespect ↳ charles_leclerc i'm just glad someone's keeping your ego in check ♥️ y/nstagram

friend1 when are you coming back to england :( ↳ y/nstagram i'm hoping to come visit next month! ↳ maxverstappen1 about that...

📍 jeddah, saudi arabia

👤 redbullracing, mine liked by redbullracing, y/nstagram and 1,928,385 others

maxverstappen1 First P1 of the season at the first race! Always grateful to stand on that top podium, especially today 🙂

see 14,936 other comments

fan sorry WHO is that in the third pic????

fan bro soft launching on a race win post...

y/nstagram trots op jou ❤️ proud of you ♥️ maxverstappen1 ↳ fan 🤨

fan did you guys see the way his girl jumped the fence to get to him after he won? relationship goals fr

schecoperez another red bull 1-2! 💪 ↳ maxverstappen1 you gave me a run for my money at the end there old man! ↳ schecoperez less of the old thank you

redbullracing rue when was this ↳ fan admin finding out about max's relationship at the same time as us is so on brand ↳ redbullracing and here i thought we were besties 😔 ↳ maxverstappen1 😉

danielricciardo you look hot in the second photo and it's not just the heat 😍 ↳ fan maxiel lives on ❤️

fan he tagged her as mine BROOOOOO who's got this man so down bad??

👤 maxverstappen1 liked by maxverstappen1, bffstagram and 194 others

🔒 y/nstagram account locked DOWN but it's so worth it for you ❤️

maxverstappen i'm sorry liefje i should have thought about this before inviting you... ↳ y/nstagram i don't regret going maxie,,, and i certainly don't regret hugging you after the race,, i knew what i was getting into, it's just a lot ❤️ ↳ maxverstappen1 ik ben gek op jou ❤️ (i'm crazy about you) ↳ y/nstagram mijn charmante prins ❤️ (my prince charming)

alexandrasaintmleux you do what's best for you ma cocotte 💗 honestly going private at the start of mine and charles' relationship was one of the best things for us ↳ y/nstagram the woe of being a wag 😔

daniel.jpg dude can you accept my follow request ↳ maxverstappen1 you followed her from your jpg acc but not your main? ↳ daniel.jpg never said i was smart ↳ charles_leclerc ^ ↳ georgerussell63 ^ ↳ landonorris ^ ↳ alexandrasaintmleux ^ ↳ carmenmmundt ^ ↳ maxverstappen1 ^ ↳ y/nstagram ^ ↳ oscarpiastri ^ ↳ daniel.jpg oscarpiastri HOW DID YOU GET HERE?? you haven't even MET y/n yet ↳ y/nstagram that's my son watch your tone. ↳ daniel.jpg i am very sorry miss y/n l/n PLEASE let me in ↳ y/nstagram oscarpiastri shall i? ↳ oscarpiastri lemme think on it ↳ daniel.jpg i hate it here

📍 suzuka, japan

👤 maxverstappen1 liked by maxverstappen1, y/nstagram and 1,394,582 others

redbullracing a quick look into max's garage! already over halfway through the season and your current world champion is on track for his 4th year running 💪

see 59,203 other comments

maxverstappen1 you know how we do 👊

fan i see a y/n at the back!! ↳ fan who is y/n? ↳ fan his gf! she was first spotted in jeddah and she's been to quite a few of his races this year! ↳ fan do you have her ig? ↳ fan y/nstagram but it's private!

fan 4 time world champ incoming! ♥️ redbullracing

user lewis is gonna reclaim his title! ↳ fan ok gramps lets get you back to the home

fan best team in the world

user oh the gold digger is back ↳ redbullracing blocked, deleted and reported ↳ fan red bull stand on business ↳ redbullracing no one messes with OUR redbull girl! 👊

👤 maxverstappen1 liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 274 others

🔒 y/nstagram did you know red bull gives you wings? 👼

maxverstappen1 must have taken you forever to think of that caption ↳ y/nstagram what can i say you're dating a comedic genius

friend1 damn ma lend me one of those jackets xx ↳ y/nstagram omg pls take one he won't stop giving them to me,,, ↳ friend1 i'll take the white cap too if you're offering 👀 ↳ y/nstagram 🫡

bffstagram the third pic... y/n STAND UP ↳ y/nstagram he has the prettiest eyes 😍 my man my man my maaaaan ↳ bffstagram we've lost her boys...

alexandrasaintmleux i see the ferrari jacket 👀 ↳ y/nstagram max nearly threw me out of the room fr ↳ maxverstappen1 you deserved it ↳ maxverstappen1 also i'm burning it when you're not looking ↳ y/nstagram charlie gave it to me :((((( ↳ charles_leclerc yeah max you wouldn't burn sweet charlie's jacket would you? ↳ maxverstappen1 i'd burn you IN the jacket if you don't stop ↳ charles_leclerc 🫦 damn i love when you talk dirty to me ↳ y/nstagram ,,, alexandrasaintmleux should we leave them to it? ↳ alexandrasaintmleux after what you showed me on tumblr... yeah maybe we should

daniel.jpg loving the drip ↳ maxverstappen1 has she still not accepted your main follow request? ↳ daniel.jpg no... i know it's oscars fault somehow ↳ oscarpiastri why am i catching strays? ↳ y/nstagram i watched baku 2018 ,, you're lucky i don't block your jpg account ↳ daniel.jpg THAT WAS SO LONG AGO LET ME INNNNNNN

📍 zandvoort, the netherlands

👤 maxverstappen1 liked by y/nstagram, maxverstappen1 and 1,998,928 others

redbullracing and maxverstappen1 getting P1 and being crowned a 4 time world champion at the final race of the season AND your home race? max verstappen we tip our hats to you 💙

see 98,284 comments

fan him lifting the trophy and mouthing "this is for you" to y/n i am so lonely oh my god

y/nstagram mijn kampioen ❤️ (my champion) ♥️ redbullracing, maxverstappen1

fan max verstappen world domination!! lets go champ!!!

fan y'know maybe the dutch national anthem isn't too bad...

👤 maxverstappen1 liked by bffstagram, maxverstappen1 and 290,948 others

y/nstagram i moved to monaco for a degree in french and fell for a dutchman,,,

max, it has been a privilege to know you, to share your happiness and to love and be loved by you. watching you do what you do best fills me with so much joy and i can't wait to see you dominate the track for many more years. here's to you. ik hou van je, mijn kampioen ❤️ (i love you, my champion)

(also hi fans of max, i am very scared about being perceived by so many of you, please be nice ❤️)

maxverstappen1 mijn hart en ziel, ik weet niet hoe ik het in het Engels moet uitdrukken maar bedankt dat je in mijn leven bent gekomen, je maakt alles een beetje mooier. ik hou van je ❤️ (my heart and soul, i don't know how to express it in english but thank you for coming into my life, you make everything a little brighter. i love you) ↳ y/nstagram maxie 🥹 can't wait to celebrate you tonight ❤️

fan hi y/n!!! glad you felt comfortable enough to come off private! we're a nice bunch i promise! (at least most of us are) ♥️ y/nstagram ↳ fan also if anyone is mean to you i will do something that puts me on the national news 🫶

fan we've only seen glimpses of her on tv, max you bagged a baddie DAMN ♥️ maxverstappen1

fan mama y papa ↳ landonorris real ↳ oscarpiastri real

danielricciardo I'M IN !!! ↳ danielricciardo WAIT YOU WENT OFF PRIV??? y/n thats so mean wtf :(

alexandrasaintmleux mon couple préféré 💗 (my favourite couple) ↳ y/nstagram c'est grâce à toi alex, je t'aime 💕 (it's all thanks to you alex, love you)

👤 y/nstagram liked by y/nstagram, landonorris and 1,386,297 others

maxverstappen1 an appreciation post for mijn liefje. being able to put up with me dragging her halfway across the world nearly every month so i can drive fast cars whilst studying for her degree. graduated top of her class (with an elective in dutch 😉). here's to you and to us. (oh and happy 11 months, i may love you a little bit) ❤️

see 10,827 other comments

y/nstagram my boy ❤️ could't have done it without your support ↳ maxverstappen1 i know, i am an Amazing boyfriend 😉 ♥️ y/nstagram

landonorris congrats y/n! knew there had to be a big brain in that ol' noggin of yours ↳ y/nstagram thanks lan! maybe i can actually teach you some french now 🤓

fan taking a long walk off a very short bridge

redbullracing congratulations to the brains of the couple! hoped you liked the gifts 💙 ↳ y/nstagram a dutch for dummies book, you think you're so funny don't you 😐

fan the flowers 😭😭😭

fan doesn't post about his championship but posts about his girl... need me a man like that