#AND THEN WITHIN 24 HOURS I BECOME ENLIGHTENED

[ambipotentsbestie]

is it really a new taylor swift album if I'm not deeply confused on the first listen?

[putschki1969]

📢UPDATE📢"sprinter" LIVE AUDIO

Thank you to everyone who voted in my poll and left a comment in the reply section of my previous post on the matter. I was intrigued when @gslin sent me a link to this audio but I had no idea it would spark so much interest.

I received two very enlightening messages today that provided some substantial evidence. With the added information, I now feel confident that I can clarify the situation. This will hopefully clear up some of the confusion.

The first lovely follower (who would like to remain anonymous) sent me their personal recording of the live in question. They have been a fan for a very long time and got the chance to attend the concert back in 2008. First up, a big apology. I wish I could post the recording but they asked me not to share it so I will respect that. However, I've been given permission to talk about it so here's what I've been able to find out〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→

Just in case you are wondering, there's no doubt in my mind that my follower's bootleg is legit. You can tell immediately that this was recorded from within the audience. There's clapping all around and the music is considerably louder than the vocals. You can still make out the song pretty well though. None of the voices sound off or out of place. It's blended together pretty well without losing the distinct vocal colours of the individual singers. Which is why I know that this can only be from the YKL Vol.#2 front act performance since you can clearly make out Maya during her "bokura ni dekiru koto wa tada" line and some other parts. From what we know, no other live performances of "sprinter" have featured Maya.

For the past hour or so, I've been listening to different versions of the song on repeat, mostly focusing on the YouTube audio and the newly acquired bootleg. While the bootleg is of admittedly quite low-quality, there are two things that very clearly set it apart from the version on YouTube. Those two obvious differences make it absolutely impossible for the recordings to be from the same live performance. And since we've already established that Maya was not present for any other "sprinter" performances, we can easily conclude that the YouTube audio is fake.

Difference #1: Absence of the infamous guitar riff. @octopusofpaint already mentioned this in the reply section of my original post. The YouTube audio has a pretty blunt opening whereas the bootleg recording starts with the guitar riff we are all so familiar with. It's hard to know how audios are cut/edited so I'd be willing to let this slide if it weren't for the next difference.

Difference #2: In the authentic bootleg recording of YKL Vol.#2, one of the final lines, "naite sakende kiete yuku bokura wa", is sung by no other than (!!)Keiko(!!). That is very surprising since it is usually not one of her lines. Look up any random official live performance of "sprinter", starting as early as 2009 on the NHK program Pop Up Japan, you'll absolutely never hear Keiko sing that line. You know who has always been in charge of it since becoming a three-person-unit? Wakana!! Now let's listen closely to the YouTube audio again, shall we? Whose voice do we hear? I'm giving you a hint! It's not Keiko's! But it's not Wakana's either!! Surprise, surprise, it's Hikaru's!! And do you know where Hikaru sings this line? Only in the studio version (and most recently during Kalafina covers at YKL but with a notably different voice so I won't take that into account here). And you know what else is very specific to the studio version? The lyrical cold open without a guitar riff. This leads me to believe that the studio version was almost certainly one of the main sources for this awkward mash-up on YouTube.

Now onto the second message I received today. This time from my lovely follower @concretebadger. Thank you so much! Many of you speculated that the 2010 live performance might have served as an inspiration for this supposed "unreleased" audio track. And I think you were not wrong about this. While I do believe that the studio version might have been the "main" source, I do think that the creator needed to add something else to make it sound more like a live performance. This is where the 2010 Red Moon version comes in. @concretebadger actually took the time to mash up the two tracks for a comparison and the result makes it quite clear that the two audios are eerily similar. Check it out for yourself〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→

If you use the studio version and Red Moon live version as base layers and then add a few tweaks here and there to distort certain sections in order to make them appear more raw and unedited, you basically end up with that mysterious track that's currently floating around on YouTube. The previously mentioned line "naite sakende kiete yuku bokura wa" might actually be a good example for the layering/mashup of those two sources. While you can definitely identify Hikaru's vocals during that part in the YouTube audio (indicating the usage of the studio version as base), there seems to be a slightly different texture to her voice that makes it sound almost ethereal. This is most likely due to Wakana's singing of the line being added to the mix. It's very subtle and Hikaru's vocals are certainly more prominent but it's worth mentioning.

Anyway. Mystery solved. At least for me. Maybe you still have some thoughts on it. Feel free to share them below.

[strawberrylabs]

Whumptober day 2 with Alhaitham!

prompt: "They don't care about you"

Whumptober masterlist

Summary: You should've listened to your friends when they warned you about the acting grand sage

Warnings: Alhaitham kinda a bitch, gaslighting, manipulation, neglect, mildly yandere themes, toxic relationship, fighting, alludes to character death, derealisation

When your friends warned you about dating Alhaitham you didn't listen to them.

"He doesn't seem like the relatioinship type."

"He's too disconnected"

"There's something strange about the way he looks at you.."

But you brushed them off. You were in love after all.

And besides, he loved you too! He must have loved you, why else would the stoic Acting Grand Sage himself agree to date you?

Besides, your relationship was great! Alhaitham told everyone about your relationship. He bragged about you all the time!

You never really paid attention to the fact he made extra sure to mention it to Kaveh whenever you saw him.

Your relationship was so sweet! Alhaitham plans weekly date nights which eventually become so frequent that everynight is date night!

You brush off your friends complaints that they never see you anymore.

Alhaitham is so observant and caring! He let you know as soon as he realised how distant your friends have been lately. You know you spend lots of time with your lover, but its not like you're with him 24/7!

You dont acknowledge that Alhaitham encouraged you to take night classes to avoid them. He said that if they were really your friends, they would change their schedule for you.

Alhaitham is so smart. This one time your friends tried to convince you that Alhaitham was manipulating you into cutting contact with them. They tried to convince you to leave him! You almost believed them, but luckily Alhaitham pointed out how flawed their logic was, and scared them into never going near you again.

You push the thoughts of what they said deep into your mind, too afraid to admit they may be right.

Alhaitham gets so overprotective of you, its cute! One time Kaveh came up to you and tried to lie to you saying Alhaitham didn't actually love you.

"I made some stupid comment about how he can do anything but keep a partner and he flipped!

When your friends tried to tell you, he pushed them away because he can't risk you leaving him and proving me right!

Don't you see? He's sick in the head!

He's manipulating you into letting him be your only human contact so you stay with him! You have to leave before it gets worse!"

Before you could even begin to entertain the idea, Alhaitham appeared from behind you and began punching Kaveh. It's a goof thing he was there, you were almost starting to believe the architect!

You can never manage to recall what happened after, as if you blacked out the second Kaveh fell unconscious. But you vaguley remember that Alhaitham didn't stop and, and the macabre crack of bone. Or perhaps the crack was within your mind? You can't tell.

Alhaitham is so kind. When you mentioned you hadn't seen your friends for a while, he enlightened you by saying they were toxic, and abandoned you.

"They don't care about you."

His words were cold, and unlike you had ever heard him before.

You decided you would do you studies at home from then on.

You wondered why Alhaitham already had the paper work ready the second you mentioned it. You also tried not to think about how you never left the house anymore. It was for the best right? yeah, of course it was!

Alhaitham was so loving! He went out and worked so much to provide for you both. Sometimes, he even got home before midnight so you could spend and hour with him before you both went to bed!

You felt bad whenever he told you he was too tired to entertain you. But it's ok, you know he's just exhausted!

One time you tried to say you were exhausted too. He spoke coldly towards you, saying you dont know the meaning of the word.

But you do know right?

Or don't you?

You can't recal.

Alhaitham is so considerate! He's so busy now, he barely has time to speak to you at all. But that's ok! He still acknowledges you! He even says hello some days!

Or does he? When was the last time he said you name? When was the last time you spoke to someone?

But you're talking to yourself now, doesn't that count?

No, talking to yourself doesn't count!

You wish you could talk to your friends.

Where are they? Are they alive? Were you alive?

What are you?

Oh yeah. You're Alhaitham's lover.

Oh yeah. Maybe you should have listened to you friends.

Maybe you should have listened to your friends while you still could.

I wont lie, this was super fun to write. Hope you liked it!

[chimivx]

HAVEN. -> Lee Know x Female!Reader ( she/her pronouns )

summary: Hyunjin was never much of a boyfriend, making all of your friends wonder why you've stuck by him for so long. You know what they say though, love makes you crazy... Or, love makes you end up in your best friend backseat straddling his waist... Something like that... Right?

words: 10k

warnings: INFIDELITY themes all throughout, hyunlix, alcohol consumption, mentions of smoking marijuana, smoking cigarettes, angry boyfriends ( if you can call it that ), brief zodiac sign talk lol, SEXUAL CONTENT, unprotected sex ( DONT DO THAT ), mature themes throughout every line of this mofo, p*rn w very long plot. If I missed anything PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

a/n: Edited and Reposted 7/7/24 <3

“I’m just so, so tired,” expelled from your lips in a harsh whisper, your following sigh equally exasperated.

“Do you think I’m not?” Hyunjin’s tone packed a powerful voltage, enough to startle your bones. Maintaining eye contact with the boy's deep brown eyes, you furrowed your brow.

“Hyunjin.” Raising your voice to a reasonable level, you placed a hand on the kitchen table that stood between you and leaned toward him. Using his full name, you made a mental note of how it affected him, the discomfort appearing in the slight scrunch of his button nose.

“You haven’t answered my question,” he sneered. With a dramatic groan you rolled your head backward, staring at the ceiling for all of three seconds before focusing back on his grimace.

“We are breaking up right now,” you said with persistence, the crease in your forehead becoming somewhat permanent. “You seriously need this information?”

“Yes,” he snapped, then shifted into a softer energy. “I never thought you’d be the one to break my heart.” The kitchen goes quiet, the only sound heard is that of the ice machine in the freezer. 

A moment passed with a stare-down, Hyunjin being the one to break it by shaking his head. A thin lock of his black hair dropped over his right eye.

“I knew this… relationship was over a week ago,” he spoke with heavy intention, his words packing a punch. “I’m not oblivious.” His hair danced over his eyes some more as he shook his head again. “But, you know how I feel about you. I can’t believe you’d do something like this, you’re not even moved out yet.” 

“Jennie,” you whispered, narrowing your eyes. Hyunjin’s expression faltered.

“Lia,” you continued on, listing names of women he’s slept with since your situationship began. “Nayeon.” He seemed to catch on, averting his eyes around the room as he scoffed, folding his arms across his chest.

“Even fucking Felix, Hyunjin, jesus!” Your laugh does nothing to mask the frustration weeping from your eyes.

“I never had sex with Nayeon, and Fe-”

“It doesn’t matter,” you shouted, your hands slamming flat on the table as your eyes widened. “Do you hear yourself?”

“I do, do you hear me?” He squinted his eyes, jutting his head to the side. “You fucked Minho,” he spoke slow, fueling the fury simmering within you, “Like a little slut, in the backseat of his car, in the parking lot of Haven, while the rest of us danced together inside.”

Swallowing hard, you refused to shrivel beneath his interrogation.

“Hyunjin-”

“Two hours ago, I’ll add,” he smirked, finding it all a bit funny. “This happened… two hours ago. Does he know what happened weeks ago? Do you remember? The moment we shared literally right here?” He pressed a fingertip into the wood, narrowing his sharp, feline-like eyes.

“No,” you said, screwing your face up in confusion. “Why does it matter?” Hyunjin took his bottom lip between his teeth, sitting backward in the chair, folding his arms across his chest.

“I know some things,” he said, smug as he’s ever been.

“Enlighten me,” you whispered.

“Certainly,” Hyunjin huffed, holding up a hand for you to see. He taps his pointer finger, “Minho’s been after you for a while,” he taps his middle finger, “You’ve been after Minho equally as long and won’t admit it,” he taps his ring finger, “You’ve got a type.”

“I do not have a type,” you said, glaring at his slender fingers that could have an obscene amount of control over you if Hyunjin really tried. Focused on your eyes, watching as they followed his hands that he placed flat on the table, he chuckled.

“You have a type,” He reiterates, “Minho’s no better than me, he’s a bartender, if anything he’s worse.”

“Minho’s as clean as a saint!” you said, and Hyunjin laughed. “He hasn’t been with anyone in ages, he’s a good guy.” Lowering his chin, Hyunjin glared at you through his lashes, speaking in a tone so low his voice had dropped a few octaves.

“Then, tell me why he fucked his friends girlfriend in the backseat of his car?”

“Oh my…” you gasped, clasping your hands over your hair, grabbing it by the fistful. “I’m your girlfriend now!? You’ve never said that word, of course this would be when you’d use it.”

“You were my girlfriend when I fucked Jennie,” he shrugged. Your eyes go wild.

“That hurt,” you dug. “Fuck you.”

“Fuck you!” He curls his lip, eyes dancing around your exhausted appearance.

Dragging your hands from your hair to over your eyes, you rubbed the sleep away gently and sighed, placing your hands on your knees. Avoiding Hyunjin’s gaze, you stared down at the table.

“I think… I think I should go,” you offered, flickering your eyes up to catch his sorrowful eyes. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” he whispered.

“Like… like you’re sad.” Shaking your head, you spoke from an empty heart. “You don’t hold an ounce of empathy for me when you go frolicking down the streets to pick up the next conventionally attractive person, and take them somewhere to hook up.” His expression doesn’t falter. “Some of them, we’re friends with, Hyunjin. So, yes. This relationship was over two weeks ago when you drove me to crazy town, to the point of no return.” His eyes are laser focused on yours. “You know, in a way, it’s like you pushed me right into his arms.” 

Stepping inside dimly lit, musty scented Haven was a bit like stepping straight into the Sahara, except the concrete floor was slick with spilt drinks, not dusty grains of sand. There were no windows either, just dinged up chestnut wooden planks for walls adorned with cheesy neon signs and posters of bands and other artists. Your personal favorite was the lit up pink flamingo with a bottle of tequila in its hand. 

A year ago, when you and your group of friends started making regular appearances here, you compared it to Hyunjin and his stretch of a frame. The banter that followed the laughter was essentially what got the two of you together in the first place, sharing the right amount of sarcasm, sparking an attraction to want to slip beneath the sheets… or into a bathroom stall.

Sitting at the creaky bar now on top of a cushion on a stool that was flattened with age, you gripped an ice cold glass of vodka and whatever seltzer the blonde bartender shot in there, twisting it on the napkin she sat it down with. Staring at the flamingo holding the tequila, it was perched above a long mirror that ran across the entire wall behind the bar, one that was short vertically, giving you a beautiful view of the scowl you wore.

The pink and yellow glow of the neon lights used to be accompanied with giggles, with soft touches and sneaky kisses. Tonight, those acts of love had his arms wrapped around Felix where they moved in sync on the dance floor, three inches apart without shame.

Glancing over your shoulder you catch them cheek to cheek, rocking side to side. Felix’s hands seemed nervous, they were greedy, but tentative, his fingertips sliding up and down Hyunjin’s tight t-shirt clad torso. The younger boy's eyes were pointed down, listening with parted lips to whatever charm Hyunjin was spilling into his ear. A hex, a curse, an enchantment that would keep Felix at his beck and call for as long as he pleased.

The sight of their hips grinding, and their thighs slipping between the others knees used to be nauseating, however, it’s been occurring for two weeks, so it’s become tolerable. 

At least it wasn’t a female.

Girls crawled out of the woodwork for Hyunjin, there was never a night where he wasn’t fighting one off of his hip. The boy could walk into a room, and in an instant have someone on their knees with just a look. Something about his aura, his lust fueled, mysterious facade of an attitude made them melt in his fingers like putty. Felix though, Felix was different.

The blonde haired boy taunted Hyunjin, insufferably oblivious to his flirting. 

The two have been friends for a couple of years, coming together at about the same time as you had found them. There were nine of you total, a group that never hesitated to let life go, not taking it too seriously. 

You all came with your quirks, your imperfections. You and Hyunjin were tied for ‘most self-destructive bitch’, while the others fit into every category, and somewhere in between, ranging from ‘funny guy’ to ‘cry baby’. Han Jisung took leadership of the funny guys, Seungmin fell into that grey area, and Felix made himself more than comfortable in cry baby territory.

Felix has a huge heart, Felix is a great friend, but Felix is a good boy, and he made it a game for Hyunjin without even knowing.

Once the Nayeon rift was over in your relationship, things were smooth for about a week, until Hyunjin got bored. That’s when Felix fell into his lap, seemingly in this very bar. Sweet sunshine, bright eyed, bushy tailed Felix, who had no idea what he was in for when Hyunjin invited him on a solo night out after a couple of days of slinking around him stealthily, buttering him up with empty words.

That night, Hyunjin pounced, and poor Felix had fallen in the trap, becoming another notch in the charismatic bastard's bedpost. 

Spinning around to watch the show the boys were putting on, you leaned your back against the bar, crossing your legs. The rips in your jeans stretched at the bend, the skinny white strings over your skin threatening to snap, much like your patience. Sipping from the straw in your drink, you shake the ice around in the half empty glass as you swallow, catching Hyunjin’s eye as he continues to twist about the floor, claws in his shiny new toy.

He stared at you for all of five seconds, then turned his chin to nuzzle his nose into Felix’s hair, closing his eyes, whispering more unholy nothings. His plump, pink lips moved effortlessly, everything about this act coming entirely too easy to him. 

For god's sake, this was just his warm up, and Felix was already buckling at the knees.

“That’s still happening?” A polished, yet dreamy voice said beside you, having approached your frustrated energy after spotting you here alone from across the room. Shifting only your eyes to give him a look, you’re greeted by Minho’s silver hair and a quick eye roll as he sat down.

Dressed simply in a black t-shirt and dark pants, accessorized the slightest, taking a seat next to you was the first of many mistakes Minho was going to make tonight.

Your heart took a tumble at the sound of his voice, a slight nervousness sparking through your veins as you took in his appearance. Minho was buff, but he wasn’t built like a gym shark like Chan or Changbin. Instead, the boy's muscles filled out the sleeves of his t-shirt just enough, something you longed to sink your teeth into.

Holding a glass of jack and coke, Minho pressed the lip of the cup to his own, rolling it side to side along the fat bottom, squinting out to the boys on the floor. His jaw was sharp, all of his features were, chiseled by Michael Angelo himself.

Taking a quick breath, you sighed and muttered, “Yes it is.”

Bobbing his head, Minho watched Felix press a swift kiss to Hyunjin’s cheek, then side eyed to see if you caught it too. To his pleasant surprise, that no longer held much of a shock value, your gaze was fixed where he balanced his glass.

Suppressing a smirk, Minho turned briefly to place the empty cup of melting ice on the bar before sliding his stool an inch closer to yours. He leaned his back on the wood, crossing his arms. You could’ve sworn he flexed on purpose, his muscles seeming more defined than ever. With his chin lowered, he shot daggers at the handsy boys with dark eyes, and eyebrows slightly upturned.

That’s when you realized you were staring.

Swallowing hard, you snapped out of the trance he quite easily put you in, and sat up to compose yourself so you didn’t appear like a schlump.

“Is, uh,” pausing to clear your throat, you asked, taking a sip of your drink, “Is Han here?” 

Nodding with more of a purpose, Minho pursed his lips and scanned the room as if to look for his shadow of a friend. “He’s here somewhere, Chan, too,” he said, glancing at you with a small smile. 

Returning it, you looked back out to the dance floor, afraid that if you eyed him any longer your cheeks would turn pink. “That’s great,” your tone fell flat while Hyunjin brushed noses with Felix, pressed chest to chest. Following your eyes, Minho’s smile faltered. 

All of your friends were familiar with Hyunjin’s tendencies, the boy didn’t necessarily keep it a secret. When it all started they’d call him out and put him on the spot, but it didn’t change a thing. Born a Pisces, he was infatuated with the life of chaos, but conversations with your friends made you question if his star sign was right. You’ve never seen him practice unconditional love.

As much as it sucked watching a friend hurt another again, and again, he was still Hyunjin, and like you unfortunately, your friends still held some sort of compassion for him. Minho however, he’s been festering in bitterness since the moment he saw you fall for the charm Hyunjin was currently casting over Felix.

He knew off the bat he didn’t stand a chance, Hyunjin was like a drug. A relentless, karmic drug that's had you hooked for too long. 

A spectator to the tumultuous year, Minho was livid Hyunjin snagged you first. You’ve always had more in common with the older boy, and if Minho had to guess, you only had one thing in common with Hyunjin. That, and your chilling attitudes, though Hyunjin was actively altruistic. You were caring, and thoughtful, and put others before yourself most times. Hell, Minho’s been standing witness to it for as long as he can remember, watching you get pummeled by Hyunjin’s emotional turmoil consistently.

When it came down to it, Minho was the one you’d run to, the guy you’d turn to for a shoulder to lean on, finding some sort of comfort in his ability to simply listen, without listening to speak. He would truly listen, and only share his thoughts if you asked.

Minho turned his chin to give you a look. He wore an expression of worry cocktailed with fury.

“What?” you questioned, smirking, knowing he had plenty to say.

“Where’s the breaking point?” he asked. “When will you finally… snap?”

“Snap?”

“Yes, snap,” he chuckled, glancing at Hyunjin momentarily. “I don’t understand how you can sit here and watch this happen.”

“Me either,” you mumbled, a little white lie.

Two weeks ago at the kitchen table with Hyunjin was enough to keep you on his side for longer. Sitting on his lap with his arms clamped around you, you held him as he sobbed into your chest, spilling muffled babbles of apologies and guilt ridden excuses for ‘why he is the way he is’. Endless empty promises, all he seemed to express, would keep you on a short leash, but what Hyunjin doesn’t know is that his cry for help was pathetically transparent.

Felix gyrating against Hyunjin’s body, probably getting off on the dance floor in the middle of a crowd while the boy he was stuck to showed you the same eyes he had given you weeks ago was enough of a sign. Hyunjin didn’t give a shit. 

“Snap,” you said. Minho raised his eyebrows.

“Excuse me?”

“Snap,” you repeat yourself, lifting a hand between your faces to literally snap your fingers.

Swiveling around on the stool, you slap your hands on the bar to stop yourself, leaning forward to grab the blonde bartender who was tending to customers on the end. Minho followed you over his shoulder, arms still crossed, wearing a smug smile.

“You’re serious?” He spun around like you, bumping your knee with his along the way. The bartender came your way, and after grabbing your order of six different shots, bustled away to gather it.

“Pretty sure,” you shrugged, tilting your head so you’re a bit closer to him. “Might as well start listening to you after all this time.”

“That’s fair.” Minho’s lips twisted into a smile. “Just hope you’re not lying.” 

The bartender placed six tiny glasses in front of you. With a thank you, you slide three of them over to Minho who raised a brow in question.

“What, lying like you?” You grilled, peeking at his eyes before knocking back a shot of tequila.

“Me?!”

“I saw you with the guys,” you smirked, happily watching him down two of the little glasses right after the other.

Wiping his bottom lip with his thumb, his brow creased, “What are you talking about?”

“You guys got here when we did,” you said, catching up to him in alcohol consumption. “Soon as Hyunjin walked away from me, I saw Han hyping you up to come over here.” Minho swigs his last shot, almost choking at the sound of your words.

“You keeping tabs on me?” He asked, squinting his eyes, closing the gap between you even more. Flickering your eyes to his lips that were wet with liquor, you looked back up and only gave him a smile. An innocent one that stirred up trouble as you downed the last glass sitting on the bar.

Placing it back in line with a clink, you hopped off the stool and held your hand out. Unable to keep his gaze off of you, Minho swiveled around, glancing at your open palm.

“Come on,” you coerce, wiggling your fingers. Laughing at himself, he snatched your hand to stand up.

“Where are we going?” he asks sincerely.

“I wanna dance,” you said, then step closer to him, lowering your voice, “And if you don’t want me keeping tabs on you, you have to come with me.”

“I’m yours,” he said, holding up his other hand in defeat. Dragging him along through the crowd of thirty other sweaty people, you peeked backward at him and raised your brows.

“Famous last words,” you giggled.

“Wouldn’t choose any others,” he squeezed your hand, narrowing his eyes.

Distracted by Felix, Hyunjin missed the change of location, peeking back over to the empty stools after you’ve taken your place on the dance floor with Minho by your friends in the corner. Han, Chan and Changbin were at a small table cradling their umpteenth drinks of the night, two of them breaking into widespread grins after spotting Minho in your grasp.

“Glad to see you’ve brought someone else along this time around,” Chan said, wrapping an arm over your shoulder, hugging you sideways. Han lifted his glass to cheers, taking a long sip afterward.

“Look at him,” you rolled your eyes playfully at them, then turned to Minho, “How can I say no?” 

Clicking his tongue, Minho tilted his head back with a smirk. “Chill,” his voice has dropped several octaves within twenty feet from the bar to the corner. 

Biting down on your bottom lip in thought, you felt the wave wash over you. Gazing into his eyes that were laced with a type of passion you’ve never come face to face with, the wave more so crashed over both of you. These seven silent seconds shifted the entire night.

Minho looked over your shoulder to his friends sitting on the high top chairs, two of them gesturing to your back wearing suggestive looks of grandeur, Changbin staying silent, simply watching. 

Han and Chan have patiently waited, marinated in forced silence courtesy of Minho for a year, slowly dying inside the longer the two of you resisted the gravitational pull that’s tried for ages to tangle you up. All of your friends have actually, aside from Hyunjin who’s only suspected the pining. Han and Chan were two who were invested, using this moment to make their self proclaimed prophecy come true, ready to witness history happen in front of their eyes.

Catching Minho, you follow his eyeline and watch Han and Chan quickly pop into natural looking poses, focusing on one another and chatting about their drinks with silly little comments that ultimately meant nothing.

“Well that was slick,” you teased. Chan peeked up from his glass, lips wrapped around the tip of the straw, and gave you a wink. Han hid behind his drink, peering between you and Minho with a hidden smirk, puffing out his already chubby cheeks.

“Have fun,” he sang, wiggling his eyebrows.

“You guys are ridiculous,” you said, and turned to face Minho. His fingers tense around yours.

“Let’s dance,” he said, then pulled you into his body, wrapping an arm around your shoulder, leading you to the center of the dance floor.

Brushing by a dozen people your age, Minho found a clearing with a smile and spun you around before finding the beat of the music himself. Keeping your hands locked, you swayed with him, stepping a bit closer to close the gap.

Minho knew what he was doing, the boy was an expert when it came to moving to music. It never mattered where he was either, if he heard a beat he liked, one that he could feel in his soul, he was going to move. Like Changbin, Minho was musically inclined, his skillset extending far beyond just dancing. Tipsy enough to stand here with him without being intimidated by his extensive resume of talents, you took another step closer, bumping into his chest.

“You ever think about doing something with dance?” you asked over the music. Glancing down to where your bodies touched, Minho looked into your eyes and slipped a hand around your waist without thinking twice. His fingertips pressed into your hip, continuing his sway, now holding you in place on him.

“God,” he muttered, shaking his head a bit. “You ask me that every three months, I think.” He smiled.

“I do,” you chuckled, placing an arm around his back, ignoring how it makes him take a sharp breath. “You just have a lot going for you.” His eyes softened as he listensed to you. “Don’t you want to get out of this place? Do something huge?”

“Course I do,” he said, and though he wore a gentle expression, his tone was rough, “Don’t you?” 

You would’ve stopped moving all together if you weren’t latched onto his body.

“I would,” you said quieter, his words striking your heart. “You know I would.”

“What’s stopping you?” His eyes zone in on you, already knowing the answer he wished you’d forget about. It took you a moment to say anything, gulping out of sheer embarrassment. You peered to the side, trying to see if you could spot where the answer had ended up.

Minho unraveled his hand from yours and placed a finger to your cheek, turning your focus back to him. Flipping his hand, he drug the back of his fingers down your skin softly.

“Don’t look for him,” he said.

“What’s stopping you?” you asked, studying his defined features. “From moving on?”

You don’t expect him to open up, Minho was always a person who knew how to keep a secret, like those dads who dropped random trauma stories out of the blue unprovoked. Minho could’ve deflected his answer, he could’ve made some shit up, but swaying here together over the liquor stained floor he keeps his gaze on you, pressing his lips into a line, perking a brow.

A tinge of excitement surged through you, a short burst of the feeling to keep you from getting swallowed back up in Hyunjin. Minho watched you like you’re made of stars, his eyes unable to part from yours. It was you. You were the block preventing him from moving on.

“You’re playing a dangerous game,” you said.

“Do I look like I care?” Minho nearly whispered, bringing his face down closer to yours. Pouting your lips, you sigh.

“Why didn’t you get to me first?” Your voice drops as your eyes flickered to his lips, your words flowing from yours with ease, like sweet, sweet music to his ears.

“He’s too pretty.” Minho tries to smile, pressing his forehead to yours.

“He’s a dick.”

“That too,” he said after a chuckle. 

Dancing this way for a couple of minutes, holding on to one another beneath the cheesy strobe lights amongst the sea of human beings who didn’t care to look your way, your hands explored skin as your lips frustratingly ghosted each other. Minho took your waist with both his arms, his hands slipping down over your ass every few seconds, feeling too nervous to keep them there for too long. Your noses brushed, eyes locking for a bit before they’d shut between the shared air of pure intimacy.

Tossing your arms around his neck, his skin was dewy with sweat much like yours. The heat pumping in the closed off bar was always kicked up to a higher degree no matter the season, but tangled up this way with Minho you knew the bar wasn’t to blame for the warmth you were feeling. 

Your mind was clear of any thoughts that didn’t have to do with the babe attached to you, running his hands over your body. Hyunjin and his treacherous reign of terror was gone, Hyunjin and Felix were dead to you. All that was left was the heat and the need manifesting around the two of you, revealing itself from underneath the love and the care.

Seeing Minho lick his lips slowly, seemingly hungry, warps your mind. His fingertips that once pressed into your skin were gripping you now with vigor, his eyes closed as he held you tight. When they opened, the look he gave you made your jaw drop with a heavy sigh. You're unable to do much else. 

In a hurry, he tilted his chin and pressed his lips to yours, this kiss long overdue. It’s packed with passion, and sprinkled with lust, deepening faster than it had happened.

Parting your lips, you slipped him your tongue and nearly moaned into his mouth. You felt him smile, dancing his tongue with yours, then he slid it along your bottom lip before biting it gently, pulling away, and letting go with a pop. Jaw agape, your eyes are wide as you stare in shock. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled, but his eyes were dark, signifying he didn’t feel as guilty as he had sounded. There isn’t much for you to say, you weren’t upset. With a minute’s worth of kisses Minho rendered you absolutely thoughtless.

“Do it again,” you whispered. His eyebrows raise with surprise, and to your request he does not hesitate. The gap closed quickly, his lips on yours in a second, hot, wet and heavy. The first kiss, and the following, were anything but innocent and sweet.

Moving with intensity, Minho sighed within the kiss, his brows furrowing above his closed eyes. You feel his hands move up your back, making their home between your shoulder blades where he can keep you locked in place. Sliding your fingers up into his hair that was littered with moisture, you gripped the silver locks and smiled when you felt him tense up. A groan escaped him, one that deepened the arousal already pooling in your center.

“What are you doing to me,” he mumbled, pressing a tender kiss to your cheek just beside your lips. Giving his head a scratch, you smile, taking a deep breath. Tilting your chin back, centimeters apart, your eyes danced over his focused look, his lips parted and eyebrows twisted with need.

“Everything I’ve always wanted to do,” you brushed your lips swiftly over his, taking them down to his neck, peppering the skin with soft, angelic kisses that set his skin ablaze. Bending at the knuckles, his fingers gripped the fabric of your shirt, knotting it in his fists.

Tossing his head backward, eyes screwed shut, he’s guided by your lips, melting into your touch as your fingertips grazed through his hair. Popping your tongue out between your lips, you drew small circles in the valley beneath his jaw before wrapping your lips over the skin, giving it a suck, leaving a happy little mark there for him to find later. Dragging your tongue over it once more, you kissed it and looked up to Minho.

His hands slid over your ass again, giving it a generous squeeze as he put his forehead back on yours, slipping you a quick kiss. Dragging your hands down his neck, wrapping them around the front for a moment, you looked into his eyes and smiled. You’ve never seen him so flustered, Minho’s always composed, always in control. Never once have you ever seen him this desperate.

“Minho,” you half asked him and his heavy lidded state.

“Hm?” he hums, unable to say much. Placing your hands back behind his shoulders, you gave him a sensual squeeze. Opening your mouth, you want to spill everything, everything you’re longing to do with him, but for an unbeknownst reason, nothing comes out. 

Lifting a hand, Minho placed it under your chin then shifted it to your neck, wrapping his nimble fingers around the base, giving it a gentle grab. Taller than you, he was above you, looking down into your eyes that have softened with submission at his touch.

“What was it you were gonna say?” he questioned, parting his lips to subtly touch yours, depriving you of a kiss you were ready for. Rubbing his bottom lip on yours, he drug his tongue over the seam of your lips, then caught them in a kiss you’d be able to hear if the music wasn’t pumping.

“Want you,” you whispered when he parted from you, your lips wet with a slick that didn’t belong to you. Sliding his hand up your throat, pressing purposely with his palm, he passed your chin and placed his thumb on your lips where you subconsciously gave the pad a kiss.

Smirking, he pulled at your bottom lip, getting lost in your upturned brows and pleading gaze. He’s always wondered how this would happen, how it would all go down eventually once he had you. Hearing plenty of stories from Hyunjin over the months, he learned that you could be a real brat, Hyunjin bringing that out of you on purpose. Minho knew if he played the jerk, the tamer, you weren’t going to walk away fulfilled, wanting more. And he needed you to want more.

Hyunjin was good at what he did, but he never listened. Hyunjin was consistent when he was inside someone, but that’s where it would end. He had one mode, get in and get off, however, Minho had a trillion, and he was ready to figure out which one would have you writhing with pleasure, whining his name.

He believes he’s got part of the puzzle figured out already.

Toying your bottom lip with his thumb, Minho whispered, “Want to get out of here?”

“And go where?” you asked, hypnotized by his gaze that was always sultry. Smiling, Minho sighed in satisfaction. He had you.

“Out of here,” he breathed, touching your lips with his briefly. “Anywhere, so you can do everything you’ve always wanted to do, to me.” 

There wasn’t a chance you were catching onto his game, or the way he was playing it. Minho was slick, and if anything, a tad more manipulative than Hyunjin. Playing the role of your knight in shining armor, appearing effortlessly perfect in every way, swooping in when Hyunjin started embarrassing himself, and Felix…

Minho knew what he had to do to get you, because like Hyunjin, you loved nothing more than feeling like you were in control. It warmed Minho’s heart to see you melt into him, and revved him up to no end knowing that you had no idea he had his hands on the wheel, not you.

You heart longed for him, more than the need between your thighs, so if you were going to do this it would mean catastrophe for the Hyunjin entanglement you’ve overstayed your welcome in. Though you meant what you said to Minho at the bar, you snapped, that didn’t mean there wasn’t going to be an ache within you over it. You loved Hyunjin. As ridiculously shitty as the boy can be, like, absolute garbage… You loved him.

“No?” Minho asked, pulling you from your spiral.

“Yes,” you said without a thought, your eyes darting between his. He raised a brow slightly.

“But?” His tone is gentle, coaching you along patiently.

“Where is he?” you asked, gesturing to the side with a shift of your gaze for a moment. Minho narrowed his eyes, a disappointed curiousness clouding in his deep brown irises.

“Why are you worried about him?”

“Becau- Minho, please.” Widening your eyes, you plead with him. “You care about me?”

“Course I do,” he answered quick.

“Then tell me where he is,” you said, then touched the edges of your lips together, tugging him closer behind his neck, and whispered, “And after that, get us out of this sweatbox, and for all I care, you can fuck me senseless on the side of the goddamn building.” His eyes blow open wide, a small smirk pulling at the corners of his lips. “Just tell me where he is.”

“Don’t want to give him a taste of his own medicine?” Minho teased, engulfing your lips with his own messily. Whining into it, feeling your heart twist deviously, the offer was intriguing. Pulling back, Minho is wearing a wicked grin. “Don’t want him to see the perfect girl he's giving up on leave with somebody else?”

“Perfect girl,” you repeat under your breath with a laugh, glancing away. “Don’t try to talk me up, you’re already getting it, Minho. Where is he?” 

Taken aback, Minho sighed and softened his smile. Maybe you could see through the game he was playing, which made you smarter than the Hyunjin he’d compare you to.

Tipping his head away from yours, he scanned the room quickly and efficiently. Hyunjin and Felix were no longer on the dance floor, they had made their way to the corner of the room where the other guys chatted away. Many, many empty glasses filled up their table making Minho wonder how long the two of you have been out here making fools of yourselves around everyone, shoving your tongues in your cheeks.

Hyunjin was speaking to Chan, standing beside him and still towering over where the oldest sat on the high top chair. Chan didn’t stand a chance, though he carried himself as if he was six feet tall.

The long, dark haired boy seemed worried, his brows furrowed as he leaned into Chan to talk directly into his ear over the pumping bass polluting the air from the speakers. Behind him, pouting pathetically with his knees squeezed together, stood Felix, clinging to Hyunjin’s arm with his cheek pressed to his shoulder. His entire front side was pressed to Hyunjin’s back, and Minho could read his expression from a mile away, knowing Felix wasn’t embarrassed to just be talking to your friends. 

That type of desperation could be sniffed out in seconds by a cat in heat. The way he gulped and breathed from between his pouted lips was a telltale sign, not to mention his brows that were twisted in need. Either he was hard, or, he came already and was hard all over again. 

Minho’s had one too many talks about it with your friends. Felix was annoyingly soft-hearted, but he was an easy little submissive bitch.

Minho watched the five of them, Chan, Han and Changbin keeping their chins down while Hyunjin looked out to the dance floor, his wild, bugging eyes scouring the crowd of people on the dance floor, probably looking for you. When he got close, Minho spun you around so that his back was facing your friends, keeping you out of Hyunjin’s sight.

“What? Is he over there?” you asked. Minho nodded, locking his eyes back on yours.

“Talking to Chan,” he said with caution, studying you closely, “With Felix glued to his back,” you both shared a laugh, “But… it looks like he’s looking for you… or, us, rather.”

“Great,” you sighed. Minho pressed his lips together, waiting for you to say anything else. For the hundredth time, he is not Hyunjin, if you were going to back out of this, he would let you. 

Watching his mind come to a complete pause as he took you in, you smiled, then rose to your tiptoes to kiss him. Not once, but three times. On his lips, on his cheek, then his earlobe, where you whispered in his ear, “Let’s go.”

“You sure?” he questioned, quite whiney, and you laughed.

“Minho!” Was all you had to say.

Strong hands moved to your waist, flipping you around so that you could lead the way out of Haven without being seen by your friends. On the way to the door Minho’s fingertips press into your torso, sneaking underneath the hem of your shirt to catch a quick graze of your smooth skin. Sharing giggles, quick kisses and tiny suggestive touches, the two of you finally stumbled out of the door after dodging a handful of others doing the same exact thing.

Outside on the cracked sidewalk there was a group of people passing around a joint, the smell of the drug smacking you right in the face as the heavy metal door of the bar shut behind you. Lined along the brick wall were others out here for a smoke, talking amongst themselves drunkenly loud. Twisting around in Minho’s arms, you tossed one of yours around his shoulder and popped your brows.

“It’s a little crowded out here,” you joked. Rolling his eyes, Minho walked you over to the end of concrete, peering around the corner into the dark alleyway where two couples could be seen feet apart making out in the dull glow of the singular streetlight that stood out front. “You thought I was serious?!” Your tone is humorous, shifting into a laugh by the end of your words.

With darkened eyes, Minho snapped his neck to look down at you, shutting you up. “I want you so bad, I’ll fuck you right here in front of the stoners.” His voice is deep, and gritty, taking you by surprise. Minho smirked. “Don’t look so shocked, what did you think you were getting into? You’re messing with a Scorpio, babe.”

Speechless, you took your bottom lip between your teeth and pressed your thighs together, becoming unknowingly comparable to Felix who Minho just witnessed harboring the same issue. His sudden forwardness fueled the fire burning within you.

There’s no need for Minho to say another word. In the cool breeze of the night, he tucked you beneath his arm and hustled you past the bleary drunks, around the opposite corner you had started, leading you right up to his car. A recognizable black four door Range Rover that was always sleek and clean. 

Wiggling free from his grasp, you gave him a cheeky look and hurried ahead of him, yanking on the handle of the backdoor. Smiling, Minho fumbled in his back pocket for the key, unlocking the doors for you, his passion burning deeper as you turned to him with a grin when you finally got it open.

Climbing in one knee at a time, Minho stepped behind you and smacked your ass gently, giving it a squeeze straight after. Closing your eyes, your cheeks flushed as you crawled across the leather seats, pursing your lips with shyness. Adjusting yourself so your feet are on the floor, you look over to Minho when the door shuts and the lights start to dim.

He appears as flustered as you, unsure of what the next move is going to be. He was surprised he made it this far.

As if you sensed it on each other, you both scooted closer toward the middle, hands nearly touching on the cushion of the backseat. With every care in the world, you leaned into one another, foreheads caressing the other, lips hovering with hesitation knowing that what was about to follow was going to change the trajectory of the drama that was your lives.

A tiny, bitty piece of you was shouting no, don’t do it, but Minho’s cut body, sharp jawline and pining eyes that were undressing you at the moment overpowered that piece of you, screaming, bursting at the seams with need. 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Minho whispered in the silence, and at this moment realized how quiet it had gotten from being in the bar, to being outside, to now being in his car. His eyes fluttered shut.

Lifting a hand, you brushed it against his soft cheek, and cupped his chin, dragging your thumb along his jaw. Minho opened his eyes, not moving a muscle until you answered him. Smiling, you gave him a slight nod before turning your head to lock your lips over his. 

This kiss is immensely different from all the others shared inside, it’s actually leading somewhere. Aside from your hand on his jaw, only your lips touch. It’s soft, well thought out, and all a bit juvenile… until it’s not. A small sound, a subtle hum from Minho set you off.

After a humiliating gasp, you’re climbing over into his lap, situating your knees on either side of his hips. Deepening the kiss, it becomes a wet, sloppy battle for who can move faster. Sliding your fingers up into his hair, he lul’s his head back onto the headrest and sighed, another whine leaving him seeming more desperate than before.

“I like that,” you mumbled onto his lips, licking a stripe across his bottom lip. Taking a breath, Minho laughed within it, his eyes shut. 

“Never had a vocal boy before?” he questioned, tilting to the side as you work your lips down the side of his neck once more, littering the honey colored skin with as many marks as you possibly could. Lifting your chin with a pop, after sucking at the crook of his neck so hard he whimpered again, you smized.

“Not unless he’s calling me a slut,” you said, and his eyes pop open, glaring toward you.

“You like that?” he asked. Bringing your gaze back up to meet with his, you raised an eyebrow and shrugged, licking your lips. Minho eyed you curiously, then like lightning, raised a hand off your waist to grip you beneath your chin, pressing his palm against your throat. Your jaw fell open in shock, the abrupt movement catching you totally off-guard. His expression hasn’t changed, he’s still eating you alive with his eyes. 

“Forget how to use your words?” His voice is soft, yet entirely demanding, “Gonna have to talk like a big girl and ask nicely if you want me inside of you, you little slut.” Gulping pathetically, he felt it in your throat. There’s a whine that escaped you, one so quiet it could be missed if he wasn’t so enthralled with everything you did.

“Yeah,” he whispered, smirking devilishly. “You like that.”

“I do,” you breathed, answering him like he wanted you to, even if he was just messing around. You knew how to follow your rules.

“Oh my god,” he groaned, releasing his grip on your neck to bury his face in it, marking your skin up just the same. Falling into his chest, tangling your fingers in his silver strands, your head falls back at the feeling of his lips on your skin, his teeth grazing along the sore spots he created. Grinding down on his lap, you moaned aloud for him, one he returned, his lips vibrating behind your ear where he planted kisses.

“Minho,” you said. “Fuck this, I can’t wait,” you whined, pushing him away. With heaving breaths, he sat back, hands falling to your thighs the same as his eyes where he watches you start to mess with the button of your jeans. 

Feeling a spark in his veins, his breath hitched in his throat looking back up to your eyes that were already looking back.

“Next time we can fool around, I just need you right now,” you muttered fast, getting your zipper down at the same speed. Minho’s smile is almost nonexistent. He’s repeating your words in his head, the two at the start wiping his mind of anything else that could possibly exist. 

Next time.

Grabbing hold of the waistband of your jeans, Minho helps to shimmy you out of them without bumping your head on the lined ceiling of his car. He tossed them beside him, placing his hands on your knees that straddled his lap again, and slowly drug them up your bare thighs, inching closer to the place that needed him most.

Cutting him short, not wanting him to touch you until he was as exposed as you- because you knew if he did you’d both get too lost in the pleasure, and you didn’t want to cum unless it was on his dick first. Minho could hold his secrets, and keep them away from you as much as he wanted, but you knew one thing to be true. Minho wants nothing more than to touch you.

Unbuttoning his pants with haste, you released a breathy sound with a smile and pull his jeans down to his knees as he lifts his hips with you on them to help you. Glancing between your bodies that were centimeters away, you were met with everything you hoped for and more. 

“Jesus, Min,” you whispered, taking a deep breath, looking back up at him. Minho rolled his eyes and laughed.

“That’s affirming,” he mumbled, and you let his hands slide up to your hips, drawing dainty circles over the newly exposed sensitive skin, inches away from where he should be. Biting your lip, pointing your gaze down, you heard him laugh again.

“What?” you asked, obliviously cute, looking at him with wide eyes.

Minho lowered his brows in admiration and said, “It’s nice to know I’m bigger than him.”

“Oh, without a doubt,” you answered, nodding your head, your expression remaining the same.

Laughing louder, he squeezed the round of your thighs and took a deep breath, leaning in to give you a quick messy kiss before he said, “Gonna show me what it’s like to fuck a little slut, or what?” 

Reaching for his hardened length, he intakes a sharp breath between his teeth at your touch, his eyebrows furrowing. Lifting your hips, you keep your eyes on him, his head falling back to look up at you with parted lips. His hands are stuck to your hips, making themselves at home there, his fingertips massaging your skin carefully.

Lining him up, he’s right in place, both of you ready to go. Through shared breath, your hearts are racing, but you hesitated. Composing himself as best as he could, Minho swallowed hard and shook his head a bit.

“Don’t do it if you don’t want to,” he whispered, giving you the whole truth, you could see it in his eyes.

“I want to,” you whispered back. “I want you, I need you…” Leaning into him, you crash your lips onto his at the same time you let your hips settle onto his lap, his girthy length slipping inside of you with ease.

Gasping, a wave of euphoria washed over you, your back arching you into his chest as his hips thrust up into you once he felt your slick wrap around him. Releasing a moan together, you both laughed breathlessly and subtly shifted as the overwhelming sensation sucked you under.

“Oh… my god,” Minho groaned from his chest, digging his fingertips into your hips. While he mentally talked down his release to himself, you swayed your hips forward and back, just slightly, to get used to the stretch. It wasn’t painful, Minho wasn’t hurting you, but he was obviously bigger than Hyunjin, something you weren’t used to.

Your body was comfortable, that much was clear, at least you could both tell by the way he so effortlessly slid into you with a shrewd squelch.

“You okay?” Minho asked as you gripped him around his shoulders, chest to chest. Nuzzling his face into your neck, he pressed a few soft kisses, feeling how, like him, you couldn’t catch your breath. Nodding, you sighed, and sucked in a gust of air through your lips.

“Yeah.” Whispering to him, you move so you can rest your forehead on his, meeting his eyes for the first time. 

With just one look into his softened, heavy lidded eyes written in a language neither you nor Minho spoke yet, you feel him tense beneath you, a feeling that has you clenching around him without having even moved. Grabbing you tight by the waist he lifts you up so only the tip of his cock is sheathed.

“Jesus,” he muttered, his blown out pupils making you smile.

“Never thought sex would get you so spiritual, Min,” you teased.

“Shut up,” he smiled, letting go of your hips so you plop back down onto his lap. A loud moan escaped you, the sensation making you clobber your hands around him tight. “Mhm, still funny?” 

“Hysterical,” you curled your lip, then kissed him with vigor, starting to move your hips over his at an unapologetic pace. Groaning as your lips ghosted his with every bounce, Minho slid his hands up your shirt and dragged his fingernails down your back slowly, sliding them back up to do it again before he held the small of your back, guiding your movement.

For minutes you stay this way, riding him on the leather seats of his expensive car, filling the empty air with filthy sounds and profanities while your hands explore each other's bodies. Minho was right, you’d never been with a guy that was as vocal as him before, not even Hyunjin. All the other guys you’ve slept with held it in, kept the sounds to themselves as if they were embarrassed, but Minho let it all go. You were certain no one would sound as beautiful as him, though. It spurred you on, let you know he was feeling incredible, and sparked the race to your release.

“Love the way you sound,” you whispered, popping your tongue out to tangle with his.

“Yeah?” he breathed, catching your lips in a kiss.

“Yeah,” you sighed, planting your hips, and twisting them in a circle. Minho screwed his eyes shut, giving you a nasty sound that makes you shake.

“Fuck,” he muttered, opening his eyes. “Are you gonna cum?” 

“If you keep whining like that, I will,” you said from behind clenched teeth, swirling your hips in a circle again, letting your eyes fall shut as he gave you what you wanted to hear. “Too soon,” you mumbled, your knees involuntarily jutting into his thighs.

“No,” he groaned, moving his hands back down to your hips. “Cum,” he said, guiding you back into a bounce, “Next time we can fool around.” Copying your words, you give him a sly look.

Letting his hands coerce you along, every few tips of your hips you throw them in a circle, making him thrust up into you as his own release stalks him down. A guttural moan was enough to let him know he should do it again, and without thinking he does. 

The two of you cling to one another, chasing your highs, singing songs of utmost pleasure for one another, the feeling within you being pulled tighter, and tighter, until it finally snaps. Your body pressed into Minho’s harder than before, locking him in place as his hips thrust up into you to ride out your high. Feeling you squeeze him tight has him spilling into you after a few more relentless bucks of his hips, definitely leaving a couple of bruises on your hips with his fingertips.

Bodies radiating with pleasure, sucking in air, shaking in aftershock like you never have, you and Minho share a slow, exhausted kiss. Parting lips, you take a few moments to gaze at one another, reveling in the euphoric feeling for a while longer.

You’re the first to break the silence, glancing to the window beside you, giggling. A smile grew on his face as he watched you, then he followed your gaze and let out his own chuckle. He lifted a hand to swipe across the fogged up window, leaving behind a smudged handprint.

“How am I getting off of you without making a mess?” you whispered to him, pulling your lips into a line with a laugh. Looking down at where he was still inside of you, he pouted his bottom lip, glancing around the backseat for anything to help you guys out. Placing a hand around your back he scooted forward, taking you with him, and slipped a hand in the pouch that was on the back of the passenger seat.

“Shit,” he shrugged, sitting back on the leather. “Guess we’re makin’ a mess,” he sighed, looking at you with a sweet smile. “Wait,” he stopped you before you could move. Wrapping both hands around your back, he shifted slowly and carefully, keeping all extremities safe from the car set up, and he placed you on your back where he could slip out of you with ease.

“Genius,” you said sarcastically. With another shrug he smirked.

“What can I say?” He played along, reaching over your head for the panties he pulled off of you a half hour ago. Maneuvering the pair of unflattering bikini cut underwear over your feet, he slid them all the way up and planted a kiss to the inside of one of your ankles. Blushing, you turn your cheek to hide, regretting your choice of undergarments. 

Getting laid in the backseat of one of your best friends' cars wasn’t on the agenda for this evening, but here you were, with Minho helping you back into your jeans.

“Thank you,” you said, sitting up to put the button back together, and Minho, who was situating himself, shot you a funny glance.

“Don’t thank me, you make it sound like-”

“For my pants, Min,” you laughed, leaning over to kiss his cheek. He opened his mouth to speak, then hesitated, letting it close, then open again. “You don’t have to say anything,” you whispered, and he huffed.

“But I feel like there’s so much to say,” he shook his head. “I mean, are you kidding me? I have so much to say to you.” His tone of voice doesn’t seem to match the strength of his gaze that’s on you. Lifting a hand, you placed it on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

“I know,” you nodded, your eyes wandering to the number you did on his neck, “I know you do, and I have… so much to say to you.” Looking into his eyes, the emotion within them shifted. What once was worried, and somewhat shameful, was now full of hope.

“Not now,” he said, and you nodded.

“Not now,” you repeated. He maintained eye contact with you for a little while longer, then sighed and nodded toward the door.

“Come on,” he said, then made you laugh with, “It’s fucking hot in here.”

Jumping out of the Range Rover, using his hand to help you out, you and Minho both share smiles as you stretch your limbs like complete dorks. Slamming the door shut, Minho held open his arms for you to fall into, burying your face in his chest. 

Circling his hands over your back, you want to stay right here and melt into his touch, but a person standing on the corner of the street caught your eye. They’re leaning against the building with their arms folded across their chest, looking straight at you.

“Minho?” You get his attention with a whisper.

“Hm?” he hummed, looking down at you, kissing the top of your head on the way. An act that made your knees quiver at the moment.

“Hyunjin is right there.”

haven masterlist ✧ talk to me ✧ thank you for reading <3

[sleepy12ftpanda]

Ey! I’m cooking something weird for DnD, and would love some input if anyone’s up for it. It’s a concept for some true deities called, “Primordials”.

"Primordials" in my DnD world are deities that manifest as the result of mortal perception. They are magically generated as a passive consequence of collective thought and represent the primal emotions which have underpinned our consciousness since the beginning of time. They are the true secret gods of the plane, as the commonly worshiped “official” pantheons are merely comprised of old adventurers who had amassed enough wealth and power to appear divine. Ultimately, the power of those “pretender gods” still stems from the Primordials, whom which hey live in constant fear of. Although some may become attuned to these true gods’ influence and believe themselves to express their will at times, these entities are not so much people as living aspects of the worldmind, taking on true forms that are more landscape than man. They are just as defined by how we see them as we are by their whims, and so long as people exist, so too will these divine beings.

To witness such a Primordial, one must succeed at a THIRD EYE check (Intelligence + Wisdom) at a DC of 20 in order to achieve an epiphany that would render its form both visible and tangible to the viewer for a period of 24 hours. During that time, a vertical slit will form down their entire face and peel it back as a lid to reveal The Eye Within, a large eyeball that had always been part of their body which had been instinctively forgotten until the moment of revelation. While the eye is open, all communication attempted with the Unenlightened will be perceived as hysteria, requiring all who gaze upon their visage to also make THIRD EYE saves. If they succeed, they will also be Enlightened. All Enlightened must make Will saves or else fall prey to their own inner natures and become receptive to the influence of the Primordial.

A Primordial’s influence is not direct mind control more than suggestion. On their turn, a player under its thrall first must state what they intend to do, the DM describe the Primordial’s impulse, and finally that player rolls a Will save to determine the actions of their character. On a 1-6, the Primordial succeeds. On a 7-13, the player character does an action that attempts to appease both minds at the same time. On a 14-20, the player succeeds.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Primordial Example:

Guiy: Primordial of Curiosity

A large eye in the sky seemingly one with the horizon comprised of interwoven, knotted tendrils that are connected throughout the world with the heads of all conscious beings at the base of the neck.

Throughout its complex it gathers information into its central eye called “The World Knot”.

Many of its thralls feel compelled to journey to The World Knot and peer into its depths, whereupon both the knot and the thrall learn the entire contents of the other’s mind. The soul of the thrall then assimilates into The World Knot while its expired carcass, set aflame by knowledge far beyond its comprehension, crumbles to ash.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[ I don't have much experience when it comes to balancing, but I know what I want to convey at least. I'm not trying to overwhelm the party with an impossible to kill foe more than establishing a force of nature that they will have to figure out how to circumvent. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment and reblog if you like! ]

[2024inwords]

Today, I learned more about the United Nations Sustainable Development Goals (UN SDGs) – specifically, how they were established to address the most pressing issues that our world is facing today. The existence of these goals became clearer to me in that I understood better how it serves as a guide for companies to take responsibility and make a positive impact on society. By recognizing that companies have a significant impact on society, the UN SDGs aim to encourage individuals and organizations to work collaboratively towards a better world. From environmental stewardship to social equity, corporations wield significant influence in shaping our collective future. Thus, leveraging this influence to advance human rights becomes not just an opportunity but a moral imperative. As I read through the Universal Declaration of Human Rights which is a document that outlines the fundamental human rights that every individual is entitled to, I felt a sense of hope. Personally, it was my first time to encounter the document and I was happy that it provides a clear and concise outline of rights that everyone has the right to access and use. Article 24 for instance, underscores the right to rest and leisure, a fundamental human right often undermined in the pursuit of profit. This was most especially “forgotten” during the pandemic when people were working from home and the distinction of work vs rest hours became “blurred” since the same space was used for rest and leisure. While the world is moving towards a work-life balance mindset now, it is comforting to know that there is an official document that specifies the right of each individual to rest. While I fortunately do not have any personal experience on my rights being violated, I recognize that unfortunately, despite the existence of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, the implementation of these principles remains uneven. One common example in the Philippine context is the discriminatory practices at customs checkpoints which is a violation of the right to travel. Individuals are subjected to profiling through aggressive questions that are sometimes not even relevant anymore to the travel which can be considered a form of discrimination. These are just examples that tell us that the path forward will be filled with complexities. Reflecting on these learnings, I realize that fostering a culture of respect for human rights requires concerted efforts at all levels of the organization. From top-down leadership to grassroots initiatives aimed at empowering employees to become advocates for change within their respective spheres of influence, everyone has a role to play. In conclusion, my recent learnings about the UN SDGs and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights have been enlightening. It's important to recognize the significant impact that companies have on society and how they can leverage this influence to advance human rights. By embodying principles of equality and dignity, companies can foster environments that are conducive to employee well-being while simultaneously contributing to broader societal goals.

[michaelcosio]

An Invitation

Let's start the New Year off right!

RICHARD B. SPENCER DEC 31

Dear Friends,

The New Year is upon us! Rest and relaxation are good and necessary. But soon, we’ll put down the egg nog and champagne and get back to work.

Substack has been a great experience for Mark Brahmin and myself. In a year-and-half, we’ve reached thousands of new readers and developed a strong community. Substack will be the basis for everything going forward.

If right now you’re a free subscriber, I would love it if you leveled up and became a full member.

t’s $9 per month. That’s the cost of, say, two-and-half cappuccinos, a glass wine, or an appetizer before a meal. In other words, it’s not a whole heck of a lot. And unlike Netflix, we offer enlightenment. And joining is more than giving us support: we’re building a community of the mind.

Here are the benefits.

No doubt, the main thing that attracts subscribers, and keeps us together as a team, are the “Members Only” calls. These occur at a healthy rhythm of twice per week: on Thursday evenings and Tuesday afternoons. Usually, 30-50 people join us live and ask questions and offer commentary. That is essential. As the community grows, these conversations will become even more lively. The podcast versions are posted within 24 hours; and the full archive is available forever. But again, this is for Members only.

I’m happy to announce that ALEX, our online university, will be open to all subscribers in 2024. Each month, we focus on a masterwork (like Hamlet, The Republic, or 2001). Mark or myself presents a lecture with slides, and the rest of the period is dedicated to discussion. We recently analyzed all of Kubrick’s major films; we read Nietzsche’s Birth of Tragedy; and I broke new ground on Shakespeare.

Previously, we charged for registration for these courses. But in 2024, things will be more accessible and better. Registration is free for all subscribers, and the full archive of courses is available as podcasts.

ALEX U is major project. It is, indeed, for lack of a better word, my dream. A lyceum—and organization that produces original writing and scholarship; teaches courses, soon to be in-person; and pursues the path of unrelenting intellectual radicalism. For too long, education has long been wasted on the young. So many Members have told me how enthused they are to return to—or encountering for the first time—the most challenging works in the tradition. And it’s certainly not academic drudgery; all the classes are fun.

Of late, we’ve seen a renaissance of “alternative education” across the board. This is a positive development. By I can confidently say that what Mark and I are doing—particularly, in integrating mythography and REM analysis—is not found anywhere else.

And, of course, there’s more… But you have to join us to find out!

I hope you consider our offer and participate in our community.

Best wishes,

[ukulelekatie]

Katie PLEASE enlighten me abt the peppa pig thing

Gladly! It’s been so long since I’ve done a linguistics infodump. This is something we discussed in the Language Acquisition class I took and later TA’d in college, and it’s a phenomenon I’ve had a love-hate relationship with ever since. (Please excuse any messy formatting, I’m on holiday *ahem* vacation, and this has all been typed out on mobile.)

In recent years, parents have been observing an interesting phenomenon in their American children, claiming that their little ones are watching so much Peppa Pig that they’re developing British accents. Seriously, look up the “Peppa Effect” and you’ll find dozens of articles and tweets about it! While this may sound hilarious and adorable, these observations are a bit misguided. First of all, accents develop as a result of exposure to other speakers in the child’s home and community. Children are remarkably flexible when it comes to their accents due to higher brain plasticity—there are tons of cases in which a young child will move from one English speaking country to another and “lose” most if not all of their original accent within a couple of years, while their adult parents’ accents remain rigid. However, these changes usually only happen after relocating to another country long-term and receiving constant language exposure from locals. An hour or two of Peppa Pig a day isn’t going to overshadow the hours and hours a child may spend daily with parents, teachers, and peers.

But what if Peppa Pig was the primary source of language input? Let’s picture a very unethical hypothetical experiment in which an American child is isolated in a room from birth and plopped in front of a TV playing Peppa Pig and other British cartoons 24/7, with no exposure to any other speech. Would that child become fluent in British English? Probably not—in order to learn how to form sentences and understand the back and forth interactions of a conversation, children need input and feedback from the real, live humans around them.¹ We’ve seen the devastating consequences of what happens when children are deprived of any language input at all, such as in the case of Genie.² But even in less extreme circumstances, it’s looking like videos don’t necessarily help babies acquire language. Several studies, including this one here,³ have found a correlation between watching TV and language delays in toddlers. Of course, that’s not necessarily to say that watching TV causes language delays in toddlers, but it suggests that children who watch TV for several hours a day develop language skills slower than their peers because their caretakers aren’t interacting with them as much and they then miss out on that person-to-person interaction that’s so crucial for acquiring language skills.

All of this aside, why might parents be observing Peppa-like speech patterns in their little ones anyway? Well, turns out that while television does little for teaching babies and young toddlers how to speak, slightly older children can pick up vocabulary through what they watch on a screen.⁴ This one iteration of many articles detailing the “Peppa Effect” mentions U.S.-based children adopting phrases like the commonly British “ready, steady, go!” rather than the more typically North American counterpart, “ready, set, go!”, or going “on holiday” instead of “on vacation.”⁵ Acquiring specific vocabulary is much more plausible than developing an entire accent. It’s not so different from learning the names of Pokémon from watching the show, or maybe parroting Bart Simpson’s iconic catchphrase, “¡Ay, caramba!” (Side note, now I’m imagining an alternate reality in which the media is filled with articles claiming kids are developing Spanish accents from watching The Simpsons. Ay, caramba indeed.) Boasting that your kids obtained some British English vocabulary from watching a program from across the pond is far more credible than claiming their accents changed practically overnight.

It’s also possible that when picking up some vocab from Peppa, a little bit of the phonetics slips in too. Let’s say a wee one who’s unfamiliar with tomatoes watches an episode of Peppa Pig and hears that adorable little piggy protagonist call it a “to-mah-to” instead of a “to-may-to.” If that’s the kid’s first exposure to the word and that information is absorbed and stored in their impressive little noggins, that’s how they’re gonna pronounce it, at least for the time being. Something similar happened to me once as a kid in which I was taught a new word from a teacher who happened to be from England. For years, I pronounced it the same way he did! I couldn’t help it—that was my schema for the word. But even still, one or two British-sounding words don’t make a whole accent. It seems that a lot of the confusion over the Peppa Effect is stemming from the fact that caretakers are conflating accents with dialects and regional vocabulary, which are all very different things. So the next time someone on the news claims that Peppa Pig is teaching kids how to speak in a British accent, remember that you shouldn’t believe everything you see on the telly—erm, TV.

tl;dr: Is Peppa Pig giving American children British accents? Nope, but definitely a little British vocabulary, and by association, a tiny sprinkle of pronunciation.

Sources:

1. FAQ: Language Acquisition

2. Genie (NOTE: This case study contains details of severe child abuse; please proceed with caution)

3. Relationship between Television Viewing and Language Delay in Toddlers: Evidence from a Korea National Cross-Sectional Survey

4. Can Toddlers Learn Vocabulary from Television? An Experimental Approach

5. ‘Peppa Pig’ effect has kids speaking in British accents during pandemic

[dilucids]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤSacrificial duties, Mondstadt ver.

would they sacrifice you or mondstadt?

includes: jean, lisa, kaeya, diluc, amber, albedo and venti.

( i'm too socially inept to request for someone to do this so i took matters into my own hands. )

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 JEAN GUNNHILDR ━━ DANDELION KNIGHT 〕

━━ is this even a debate? jean would sacrifice you to save mondstadt.

━━ the question would tear her apart though, she'd spend so much time trying to find another way to save both her city and you that she'd neglect her health ( basic needs, like eating, sleeping )

━━ if it were a person or god who was demanding these terms, she'd try to negotiate anything to save both, even her own life, though if you were willing, she'd hesitantly ( literally beg you to not go through it and reassure she'll find another way ) let you go.

━━ no matter what she chooses, she'll still feel incompetent in the end, as if she isn't good enough to be the acting grandmaster and would probably overwork herself to try and focus on something.

"I'll do it," Jean looks back at you, horror flashing through her eyes though you didn't falter, still staring the entity in her eyes. The wind picks up as if feeling the ameno swordswoman's vivid emotions, she shakes her head, taking small steps towards you as she reaches out for your hand. You cringe when she fell to her knees, "no no no, please, you don't have to do this."

You don't look at her, knowing it would only make things worse for the both of you, you didn't want her to be the last thing you saw nor did you want your face to plague her dreams like a ghost. "I care about Mondstadt too, Jean." You hope she understands that you were also doing this for your city and doesn't blame herself, "it's my duty."

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 LISA MINCI ━━ WITCH OF PURPLE ROSE 〕

━━ lisa is a bit more of a wild card.

━━ lisa only oversees the library of mondstadt but it's really unclear the extent of her care for the city itself.

━━ it's impossible for one to say if she would hold a lover priority over a city due to lack of background so that's why she's more of a wild card right now, because i could see her potentially doing either.

━━ though i'm leaning a little towards sacrificing you because of her closeness with jean and her involvement in the knights of farvonius, she knows it would be morally wrong to sacrifice an entire city for one person, lover or not.

"It's okay," you reassure her, smile still gracing your face albeit the heavyweight pressure of death for your city digging it's claws into your shoulders. "I'm sorry," she apologises for the nth time and you can do no more than squeeze her hand in affirmation, knowing a hug would be too much for the both of you right now.

You feel her fingers slip through yours and your hand is embraced by the winds of Mondstadt, a sudden change from the electricity that plagued her fingertips and passed onto yours. You take a shaky breath and leave her behind you, her eyes watching your back along the way until you were nothing more than a dot in the horizon━━ ready to become a star in the sky.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 KAEYA ALBERICH ━━ FROSTWIND SWORDSMAN 〕

━━ another wildcard!

━━ unlike lisa, however, i'm leaning towards sacrificing monstadt.

━━ even with all his background knowledge, kaeya is still a character that holds a lot of secrets and it's canon that he's a mysterious figure, cavalry captain or not.

━━ don't get your hopes up though, because he still may sacrifice you ( after a talk with jean or diluc/j )

━━ kaeya lets anything happen as long as it falls into place of how he has expected to end, he really doesn't know what to do when an unknown entity shows up and demands the price of you for his city or vice versa.

━━ really hard to get a grasp on him.

━━ i could see him spending one last day with you after deciding he was going to give you up ( you obviously knew of this ) but after 24 hours with you, away from mondstadt, he might realise that, even if he regrets it for the rest of his life, he'll never be able to give you up.

━━ alternatively, if he didn't open up to you about this or went to jean or diluc, they would convince him to "do what's right" and give you up.

"No. I'm not doing it," his tone differed from the norm━━ he was never like this, not even on official knights' business. His eyes unnervingly determined, tone you were unable to refute, and words that scared you. "Kaeya, you have to," your fingers place themselves over his, which were barely touching your cheeks.

"I'm not doing it," he reaffirms, sounding as if he were trying to convince himself out of all people. "I'm━━ I'm not losing you to some city. I can rebuild a city, we can find a city elsewhere," he states, eyebrows furrowed and not taking a single breath between his words. You pry his fingers away from your cheek, holding them over your lap. "Kaeya, this isn't just 'some city', it's the city you love. The city we love." You coax, finally getting him to look into your eyes. "You're the person I love." He says, exasperated.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 DILUC RAGNVINDR ━━ DARKNIGHT HERO 〕

━━ hate to be the bearer of bad news,, and as biased as i am to this man, he would give you up.

━━ wouldn't open up to anyone about it, he'll just drive himself insane pondering both options.

━━ and although it would literally make him insane even thinking about losing someone precious to him ( again ) but his loyalty lies within the city of freedom and the city alone.

━━ even after the dispute with the knights of farvonius ( in the webtoon ), he still remains as the protector of mondstadt and i don't think nor am i able to see it will ever change.

━━ unlike kaeya though, i don't think he'll be able to see you at all once he decides to sacrifice you, he'll just be reminded that he'll never be able to see you again and the terrible decision that he's going to go through with.

━━ will also throw himself into extensive work to get you off his mind afterwards.

"You okay there?" Your eyebrows furrow, leaning against the open door of Diluc's office, seeing his hair tied back into a bun, hands in his face as he gazed deeply at his wooden desk. His head flies up at the sound of your voice, clearing his throat, "when did you get here?"

You shrug, taking steps towards him as he leans back into his chair, "being a hero taking a toll on you?" You tease him, taking a seat on his desk next to him and placing your feet on the chair, leaning forward to cup his cheek. He turns away. You're no stranger to his austere ways so you merely lean back, balancing yourself with your hands against his desk, telling him about your day.

"━━and then he wrapped it up and sent it to me, which was awfully disturbing might I add."

"I'm sorry," your eyebrow quirks when he suddenly cuts into your storytelling. You push yourself forward, reaching out for him and redirecting his gaze ( which hadn't looked in your direction even once ) onto you. "What's wrong my dear?" He only grimaces at the nickname━━ wincing almost and still refused to look at you, gaze cast upon the floor behind his bangs. You couldn't even see his eyes.

"Your guilty act is making me ponder if you've had previous relations with someone else, Master Diluc," you frown a little, using your other hand to force him to peer at you. He leans forward, placing his forehead on yours and whispers, "never."

"I just wanted to apologise for the future," you smile a little and place a kiss on his forehead. "I will always forgive you."

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 ALBEDO ━━ THE CHALK PRINCE 〕

━━ albedo's original creator hails from khaeri'ah and venti, archon of mondstadt, was one of the original seven who aided in the destruction of khaeri'ah; is that enough reason to destroy it for a lover? no.

━━ would he still do it? yes, yes, yes.

━━ we all know he considers himself a threat to mondstadt but i don't think he would've ever thought this was why he was a threat, to hold an entire city in his palms and be able to destroy it with a single word was quite a terrifying thought.

━━ it wouldn't stop him though, i really don't think albedo holds any sentimental attachment to mondstadt, he only works and lives there as of right now but he's currently heeding his creater's words and pursuing the truth of the world.

━━ he might grimace over losing a few people that he holds dear and end up rethinking his decision but in the end, will choose you.

━━ another reason i think he would destroy mondstadt is that, once albedo discovers something or the feeling of enlightenment that comes with studying something new disperses, he is quick to stop studying that and abandon it due to the "bittersweet truth" hitting him so if he grew tired of mondstadt,,,,,, rip to jean 🙏

Your eyes flicker from the sight of his back to the unknown entity, hovering just above the floor, her eyes uninterested in you as she gazed into Albedo's eyes, maybe trying to read his expressionless face. "Have you made a choice, Kreideprinz?"

Nothing is said. Nothing from Albedo nor you, you didn't seem to have a part in this private conversation but you also seemed to be an integral part of it due to the way Albedo kept looking back at you, squeezing your hand as if to remind himself that you existed. "I'm choosing them."

She peers at you now, her eyes boring into yours as she scans you for something, "are you sure about this decision?"

For some odd reason, you're not offended by her words, maybe because she didn't sound like she meant it in a rude way ( it also seemed out of her standoffish character ) but was genuine in her curiosity if Albedo would go back on his words. He squeezes your hand again, rubbing circles on the back of your hand━━ something he did to calm you but it seemed that this action was to ground him instead.

"Yes, I am."

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 AMBER ━━ OUTRIDER 〕

━━ YOU.

━━ in the most heart breaking – heart warming way ever, she'd give you up.

━━ notice how more than half of these mondstadt fuckers would give you up? yeah 🙄

━━ on a serious note, a lot of them have devoted themselves fully to protecting the city and i don't see any one of them being able to give the command to destory the city, even if their s/o was being held with a knife to their throat right infront of them and amber is the very same.

━━ even though we don't know to much about her, she is seen as a perfect example of justice by kaeya, and is extremely devoted to her work, she's just below diluc and jean in the most to least likely to sacrifice you in my opinion. it's simply overlooked due to her lack of presence in the game.

━━ i think her compassionate and kind side will make it harder for her to come to a decision because she doesn't want to have to lose one thing to keep another but in the end, she will give you up.

Amber seemed extremely distressed, immediately running into Jean's office once arriving back at the Knight's base after finishing her usual trek of Mondstadt's surroundings. You had attempted to call out her as she ran through the halls but she didn't even look your way, which was peculiar to you but you could only guess something dangerous must've happened due to her eagerness of reaching Jean's office, slamming the door wide open.

You quirk an eyebrow and Kaeya, stood beside you, whistled briskly, hands on his hip. "Someone's in a hurry," you roll your eyes at his comment and simply grab his arm, dragging him over to Jean's office, "just shut up and come."

The minute you knock and open the door however, the room is quiet. Jean sat on her chair, elbows placed on the table and concern burrowed deeply within her furrowed eyebrows and Amber, who was shaking her leg up and down in anxiety, fiddling with her nails.

Kaeya seems a little amused by the situation, unlike you, who was extremely concerned by the little actions of anxieties Amber was exhibiting, striding over to her side in an instant. Placing your hand on her shoulder, she leans into you almost instantly and begins quietly sniffling into your shirt.

You mouth to Jean that you're taking her out and Jean nods, thanking you with a small smile on her face. You guide Amber into a quiet room in the headquarters, letting her silently cry as you attempt to soothe her. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?"

She shakes her head, only repeating a small, "I'm sorry."

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ〔 VENTI ━━ WINDBORNE BARD 〕

━━ venti is characterised as a free spirit, like the freedom that the city of mondstadt represents, he carries that within him but at the end of the day, he is still mondstadt's archon.

━━ so we all saw this coming but you 👫

━━ i don't really think there's a lot to explain, he's their archon and even if he loses everyone he's ever loved, his priority is mondstadt.

━━ he'll probably take you on that ride on dvalin he's been promising you for the past year with no explanation.

━━ you'll ask him why he's dragged you from work and he'll just say he's feeling nice or that the winds are good for a ride right now.

━━ you'll stare at him with that, 'don't–you–control–the–winds?' look and he'll wink at you, telling you to stop staring at him or he'll blush.

━━ will completely come undone when he seed you happily laughing on dvalin's back, arms spread open as your laugh echoes into the wind.

Your excited whooping is all he hears, previous nervousness abandoned with his hands placed on your waist as Dvalin pierced up above the clouds; the ground nothing more than a fleeting dream to you both. It's such a shame that young, immature Dendro Archon got his hands on you first, gifting you his gift of Earth's nature━━ if not for the God of Wisdom, Venti would've gifted you heaven's winds if he knew how simply being in the sky made you so ecstatic.

The adrenaline finally dies down when Dvalin arrives just above the clouds, wings creating new and dispersing the old. You lean into Venti who takes this as an invitation to push himself further into your side and begin playing with your fingers, allowing you time to simply relish in the situation. "You're awfully quiet today," you muse, staring at Venti with a small smile.

He hums, "it's quiet up here," in nothing less of a whisper. You nod along with his words, fighting the urge to jump into the clouds, knowing you'll pass right through them. Venti sinks into you further somehow, like you were a passing cloud; his shoulder pressed into the crack of your arm and torso, head leaning on your shoulder. "You'll be okay Venti," and you embrace him.

[thed4rkhand]

So today we’re doing Yoongi’s chart and my analysis of it. Let me make it clear right off the bat, that since I’m not a professional astrologer, some things may not match up, further since we’re not super sure of his birth time, it’ll definitely affect the reading. What I can be sure of is that I’ll do my best and I’m completely open to constructive criticism from you all!

Now lets get on with some basic stuff, for those who have not yet read the post with Namjoon’s moon analysis, I’ll again reiterate some principles of Vedic astrology! In the scenario that you’re still confused with all this jargon, feel free to reach out and I’ll be more than happy to help you out.

Starting out, we have to note that while western astrology is usually more advisory in nature, Vedic astrology’s main purpose is to predict. Also, we usually go a sign back from western astrology (24’ back to be more precise) in Vedic astrology, so according to that for example, if you’re a libra rising, you become a virgo rising in Vedic astrology and so on and so forth. All planets will also shift back a sign, so a Capricorn Mercury will become a Sagittarius Mercury.

Now let’s be aware that the chart may be a bit different, but given the main d1 (Lagna) chart remains the same for about 2 hours, let’s focus on that and the moon chart (rashi chart) for this reading. We can also just look at d9 for strength but not house placements as that can be time sensitive. So, we can take a two hour margin of time discrepancy and still predict accurately.

For this reading, we have taken 9th March 1993 as the day and 7:30am as the time of birth, with the location set to Daegu.

OTHER THAN THIS, LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT ME TO DO A BIRTH TIME RECTIFICATION FOR YOONGI LATER ON SO WE CAN GET MORE ACCURATE PREDICTIONS.

Since this is a general chart analysis, we shall be covering topics briefly and discussing the moon, ascendant and sun. For an in depth reading, do pick a smaller and focussed topic as we can honestly keep going on and on about a chart.

THIS READING WILL BE DONE IN SEVERAL 4 PARTS, FOLLOWING THE ASCENDANT, MOON, SUN AND MISCELLANEOUS.

Lets get started then-

Right off the bat, we can see that Yoongi is born into Pisces, with his ascendant at 10’35’, within the Nakshatra of Uttarabhadprada, within the 3rd quadrant or pada. He has venus situated in the lagna itself, in Pisces, thus exalted. His lagna lord, Jupiter, is in the 7th house, conjuct with the Moon, in the sign of virgo, where jupiter gains the upper hand despite mercury (lord of virgo) being enemies. The lord is directly aspected by mars in the fourth house. The lord of the birth Nakshatra is Saturn here, which sits in the 12th house, conjunct sun and mercury (dispositer of the ascendant lord). Lastly, moon, jupiter and rahu aspect the lagna of this chart. Of course there is so so much more here, but we’ve got a whole chart to cover!

(p.s I can already see this is such a fun chart to read)

Getting on with the reading, we firstly see that he’s born under Pisces lagna, this makes the native calm and collected, as well as fond of philosophy and psychology. What we often forget is, people born under Pisces are said to have been born under all the other signs in their past life, and cumulatively they use their skills and knowledge from those lives in their current one. Remember how on Bon Voyage trips and just about every RunBts, saga seems like the ‘dad’ of the bunch? cooking, cleaning, fixing stuff Joon broke, producing music and the stuff? And all those times that he is so very understanding of other? He doesn’t scold Jungkook, let alone anyone else? These are typical Pisces traits. They’re very domestic and understanding by nature, because they’ve been there before in a past life, and enjoy taking care of people.

The downside to this? They can be extremely manipulative if they want to be, they know exactly what to say, when to say, to whom to say and so on. They have an alarming grip on people’s emotions, and have a magnetic quality to them. Further, this is mostly an observation, you’ll often notice that most pisces natives are fond of alcohol (could be because they exist in a water sign? Could be because its the natural 12th house ruler of addictions too?)

Coming to the Nakshatra here, we have UttaraBhadrapada, the second last Nakshatra of the series. This Nakshatra is ruled by Saturn, and the presiding deity being Ananta or Ahir Budhyana, the deep ocean serpent in hindu mythology. The deity Ananta represents boundless expansion, be it of fortune, goodwill or knowledge. Ahir Budhyana, is a sattvic (sacred or untainted) form of lord Shiv, and resides at he bottom of the ocean. He represents the liberation from illusions and attainment of spiritual enlightenment and knowledge. The natives of this Nakshatra here embody these qualities of their deities. We see them as philanthropic and reserved beings, who enjoy learning about a variety of subjects and spirituality. Such people are extremely progressive in their thinking patterns, and often a magnetic pull like the deep ocean serpent has.

They’re extremely controlled and calculating in their approach, and think more than speak. This by no means is to say that they don’t speak, because such people are great orators by nature. They stand up for the underdogs and have a unique approach to topics. They are extremely interested in occult and metaphysical practices and theories. They however commonly don’t obtain higher education or do well in fields of fine arts, even their primary education is not something they excel at. (i once read that yoongi really likes reading about a variety of subjects, and also Paulo Coelho, definitely his UttaraBhadrapada here)

The bad side to this Nakshatra? They’re very critical and over-analyze everything and everyone. Sometimes, even unconsciously, they manipulate people to suit their needs and whims. They get side tracked too often and have difficulty focussing on one task at hand, often amounting to laziness in other people’s eyes, even if the native is extremely hardworking in reality. However when in comes to personal care, they tend to do things in a very half-hearted manner. These people are also prone to isolating themselves from others, especially when things get hard. Due to the sign falling in pisces here, people also tend to have many different mental burdens and disorders, which arise from their constant scatter-brained self and inability to make out between the spiritual and real realms.

They can also be heavy drinkers and abuse substances in such a Nakshatra, or enjoy partaking in occult practices while under influences. They might’ve also faced a very rough childhood with such a Nakshatra, neglected and misunderstood by people around him. The natives could also have moved away from their parents during their early adulthood for education or job purposes. Such people can have health issues like hemorrhoids, stomach ailments and hernias. Usually they lead a stable period full of health and success in the latter part of life, say about after 48 years(since the south node Ketu matures as 48).

Since Suga’s Nakshatra falls into the third pada or quadrant, its ruled by libra here. Libra here focusses on balance and cooperation. Such people may make a living working with other people, or in industries related to entertainment. They may make great debaters, and think excessively about what other think of them as. They’re very conscious of other’s opinion, even if they don’t show it, so we often find such people wearing extremely covered up and baggy clothes for example, or keeping a low profile. They may have a very practical and unbiased approach to most things in life. Such people are intensely into spiritual practices and often times fully devote themselves at hours at a time to worship of gods, angel or other beings. They may be the type to attract people very easily, or even be the kind to fall in love extremely easily.

The second placement we come to, is Venus in the first house, in Pisces. Venus here is naturally exalted (most powerful). Sure ill give you the generic explanation in a bit but, do you know which type of people usually have this placement? Actual saints and famed occultists. Sure many people within the entertainment industry too, but this placement can hands down be one of the most spiritual and divine placements of Venus in the chart. First ill go ahead and give the normal meaning and effect, and then lets dive into the crazy stuff (istg his chart is so goooood). Such people usually have really magnetic personalities, and given Venus is in Uttarabhadrapa, these are the people who you don’t notice at first, but then its like a whirlpool of being invested in them, as opposed to being in Revati Nakshatra (another Piscean nakshatra) which would be a more dramatic pull, based off an extroverted personality. These people can be very good looking, more feminine looking, could definitely look like their mothers with this position. Brilliant luck in fields of arts and entertainment and also genius level of creativity and talent. Here, people can have brilliant luck too, like god’s hand on their head kind. Accumulation of wealth and property can also be seen here.

Now onto the really fun stuff. These people are actually rarely concerned with someone’s exterior, because often times such people have such good intuition and spiritual powers (some are literally called mystics because of this), they can literally see through someone. For this reason, they actually don’t like associating with too many people, despite having a very charming personality. These are the kind of people that keep searching for ‘the one’. These people often give up everything and go ahead and become priests. The calling to god with such a placement is very strong. They also don’t like collecting too many material possessions, as they feel its redundancy in this very changing world. These people hold the few people they’re close to, very very tightly to themselves. These people also may have a very low sexual drive actually, (i know, I know, how can a strong Venus do this?) because an exalted Venus is about devotion to god, to one person, and leaving sensory pleasures behind in life. A debilitated Venus on the other hand (eg. Jungkook has one) might make someone very invested in worldly matters. These people are happy with being alone and single for a long time, they’re very satisfied with their own company. Such placements can make someone practice magick or astral projection too. (Venus in 12th sign of liberation, liberation from physical body)

Given that in this chart, Venus is his 3rd and 8th lord, we can make further deductions. Firstly, since 3rd lord is going 11 houses away, its an extremely auspicious placement here. Self made person, making wealth through communication, can also have very witty and intelligent responses to things. Since the third house also represents courage and valor, this can make someone very fearless and say whats on their mind bluntly. Since the 3rd house is part of the Kama Trikon houses (houses of desire), this going into the 1st house, which is a part of the Dharma Trikon houses (houses of morality), gives interesting results here. Firstly, such people are fiercely independent, and hate to be disrupted when there pursuing their goals and working towards them. They hate to take help from anyone, and as a result are extremely competent. secondly, such people have a moral high ground, to which they religiously abide. They’re extremely righteous and stand up for those who wouldn’t be able to for themselves. Since from here, it aspects the 7th house of agreements, such people are great at understanding and signing contracts for work.

Now with the 8th house, we have a bit of a conundrum here honestly. It belongs to 2 types of houses, the moksha trikona houses (houses of salvation) as well as the Dushtana houses (evil houses). While this placement isn’t all that bad, it isn’t he best either. firstly though, this is a placement where the native always wins over their enemies (8th lord 6 houses away from itself), be it enemies as in people, or simply obstacles in their life. This also confers a long lifespan to people, given that his 8th lord is also exalted here. However such people are prone to accidents, given that the 1st house is the body, 8th house is sudden events and the natural 8th ruler mars is a karka or signifactor of vehicles. Such people are also against organized forms of religions, since the Dushtana lord is sitting in a dharma house. The native is also extremely private and secretive given the 1st house of self has the 8th lord of secrets sitting in it. Since it also aspects the 7th house of other people, this person has that aura of mystery about them because of this. Such people are deeply critical in nature but can have extreme wisdom in cases of hidden objects or matters of the occult.

Now coming to his aspects. His Venus is aspected by moon, Jupiter and Rahu. The first two are benefic in nature and the latter is malefic. Moon-Venus and Jupiter-Venus are also mutually aspecting each other in pairs here. Moon here gives Venus the property of being constantly cynical of themselves regards to what others may perceive them as, given moon is emotion and the 7th house here is other people. Their thoughts here are deeply influenced by other people, they may always keep serving other people too, through acts of service. This also makes someone who falls in love very easily, but it is important to engage this person’s mind in a relationship, they just cant do without an emotional bond here. Since Moon also represents fame in a chart, this makes a person very famous, as they receive attention from many people, and people want to analyze them, and enjoy their work and presence.

Jupiter here, makes the person level headed and practical. The person wouldn’t be all touchy feely with people they like, because they would like to remain more in control of the situation here. They’d rather engage in a full blown debate with someone, than hold hands. This also makes them very worldly and teacher like, while also being attracted to very worldly people themselves.

Rahu’s aspect on the other hand, makes someone stand out in a crowd (Rahu signifies an outcast), they may have a rough and cold exterior due to this. They may also have had issues with body image (1st house is self), or mental health here. These people are enamored by all things foreign, and love exploring the other cultures. They may have issues identifying with their own community at large, and may identify with the downtrodden of the society.

Now going to Jupiter and moon conjunction in the 7th house. I wont go very deep into this, as its a super interesting concept, and it’ll be better covered in the second part of the reading regarding the moon itself, so ill keep it short and related to the ascendant. Also the mutual aspect part will be explained in more detail in the miscellaneous section later. Plus this is getting far too long for even me now.

Getting on with the reading for now, moon and Jupiter here are in virgo, in a loose conjunction (one is at approximately 2’ and the other at 18’). This is actually one of the not very yogas (combinations)in a chart, about 15% of people have these. Its called the Gaj-Kesari yoga (the elephant and lion combination), because people with this are so extremely lucky, its like the kings of the jungle are together to support it. They have the wisdom of the elephant and the courage of a lion. This is a raj yoga (royal combination). a native born with Gaj-Kesari Yoga is intelligent, strong, and prosperous. Gaj or Elephant possesses immense strength and is devoid of pride and the Lion is known for his foresight and skillful intelligence as well as his strength, quickness, skillful leadership, ability and courage. Thus, when Gaj-Kesari Yoga is formed then that person is extremely successful. They will be a kind and philanthropic person, who will always have sympathy for others. They will be quite humble regarding work, would like to talk nicely to people and aim to attain spiritual progress in life. Many people will recognize them as their mentor or guide and will act according to their instructions or advice. They may have a tendency attracting people and people being magnetized by them. They will be blessed with abundant wealth and become the owner of movable and immovable property(cars as well as homes). They will establish relationships with rich and reputed people of the society and enjoy all kinds of material pleasures in life.

Since this occurs in virgo, it makes a person intelligent, sharp and gifts them with amazing memory power. Such a person is knowledgeable and can become the head of a large educational institution. He may own incomparable wealth and can earn a good name and money from business as well. Often such people earn a high reputation in the Stock Market and make progress in life by working in any financial institution or insurance sectors.

Here jupiter in particular makes someone extremely cynical in nature, and their mind is always, and I mean always, thinking about romantic relationships or platonic ones. However given that jupiter is also the 10th lord here, they could be extremely focused on work too. Their life is surrounded by contracts, and may work with others for a living(7th house is house of courts and partnership). They could be very interested in the financial sector here, they could be extremely money minded and money means stability to them. Moon here on the other hand makes the person very moody, and extremely dependent on their spouse or colleagues. Since it rules the fifth house here, it signifies that such people are extremely creative in their work, may work for children or young adults, have a lot of past life karma related to work, and also that they’re extremely devoted lovers. They tend to criticize their close friends and loved ones, just because they’re so cynical and blunt, and want the absolute best for people. They may hurt people’s feeling without realizing it sometimes. (this was very brief but refer to point 12)

Now coming to Saturn in 12th, as the lord of the birth nakshatra. Saturn over here signifies working in the fields of music, but given saturn represents electronics, it could mean a producer too. Since its in Aquarius here, a sign of dual lordship, this resents a constant up and down of mood and life spirit. The person with such a placement is confused with what truly makes them happy in life, the spiritual realm or the materialistic realm. They keep going up and down the path of being spiritual, till 36 years (saturn matters at 36). They may face a lot of mental disorders here. They may have trouble sleeping at night. Given saturn is also work, they may earn through foreign sources in life. Such a person invests money into properties (saturn is houses) and lacks liquid cash. The person may have a weak left eye (12th house is left eye). They may earn from multiple sources in life, and have multiple talents. Such people have low sex drives as saturn is a dry eunuch planet, and in the 12th house of bed pleasures, it may not allow native to enjoy it. They may not be interested in worldly pleasures with such placements.

Lastly (finally?), we have to discuss the looks! Pisces ascendents usually have the short to medium height, and tend to appear a little fuller even when they’re very scrawny. (its because jupiter is the largest planet). Uttarabhadrapada natives tend to have a very innocent look to them, a very calming nature and vibe. however, like the deep sea serpant, they have very deep and magnetic eyes, and a very expressive face (yoongi memes). They usually have a very beautiful smile, and can literally attract people with it (again the snake like quality). They tend to have a very blank look usually, and if you ever notice, they’ll have the most stunning eyelashes actually, given the yoni is the female cow. They might also have the habit of moving their mouth around when their thinking, quite like ruminating.

Given venus sits here, is gives the person very attractive, effeminate features. Think extremely renaissance type of soft features. It can give them very delicate hands and feet with such a placement. The moon aspect here, gives them a rounded face and pale skin. They might have sparkly eyes and a roundish appearance here, also the tendency to gain weight around their face, with short necks. They make also look much younger than their actual age.The jupiter aspect again makes the native very other worldly looking, almost like you can imagine them in a dark robe literally performing rituals. It gives people a calm and teacher type of vibe to them. The rahu aspect usually just blows qualities out of proportion. Have you seen how small and angelic suga looks compared to the other? (not saying they’re not angelic but still), thats the rahu aspect. Again, rahu aspects only get better with time.

So this was my analysis! If anyone has any questions or doubts, hit me up! Let me know if you enjoyed it!

[thehierophage]

Holy Day Meditation for 4/10/21 e.v. - The Feast for the Third Day of the Writing of the Book of the Law

April 10, 2021 æ.v. Dies Saturnii, 

☉︎ 20° ♈︎ : ☽︎ 4° ♈︎ : ♄ : Ⅴⅴⅰⅰ 

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law. 

The Feast for the Third Day of the Writing of the Book of the Law, The Greater Feast of Saint Swinburne, The Day of Aleph, The Day of the Fool 

Hebrew Letter: Aleph 

Numerical Value as Letter: 1 

Numerical Value as Word: 111/831 (Aleph+Lamed+Peh / Aleph+Lamed+Peh [fin.]) or 117/837 (Aleph+Lamed+Vav+Peh / Aleph+Lamed+Vav+Peh [fin.]) 

Meaning: Ox. 

Thoth Card: The Fool (Atu 0) 

Alternate Title: The Spirit of Aethyr. 

Image: 

Correspondences: 

Tree of Life Path Association: Key 11 - Chokmah to Kether (from Sephira 2-1) 

Astrological Sign: - 

Element: Air 

Egyptian Godforms: Hoor-pa-kraat, Mout, Shu, Tefnut 

Geomantic Figure: Those of Airy Triplicity 

Gemstones: Topaz, Chalcedony 

Perfumes: Galbanum, Pinus, Gum Arabic, Mastic, Anise and all fresh odors. 

Plants: Aspen, Peppermint, Lime, Linden, Pennyroyal 

Animals: Eagle, Man (Cherub of Air), Ox 

Colors: 

King Scale – Bright pale yellow 

Queen Scale – Sky blue 

Prince Scale – Blue emerald green 

Princess Scale – Emerald, flecked gold 

The Secret Instruction of the Master:

Know Naught! All ways are lawful to Innocence. Pure folly is the Key to Initiation. Silence breaks into Rapture. Be neither man nor woman, but both in one. Be silent, Babe in the Egg of Blue, that thou mayest grow to bear the Lance and Graal! Wander alone, and sing! In the King's Palace his daughter awaits thee.

Mnemonic:

Truth, laughter, lust: Wine's Holy Fool! Veil rent, Lewd madness is sublime enlightenment.

Recommended Text for Meditation:

Liber AL vel Legis sub figura CCXX, Cap. 3

The Book of the Law Liber AL vel Legis sub figura CCXX

as delivered by XCIII = 418 to DCLXVI

III

1. Abrahadabra; the reward of Ra Hoor Khut.

2. There is division hither homeward; there is a word not known. Spelling is defunct; all is not aught. Beware! Hold! Raise the spell of Ra-Hoor-Khuit!

3. Now let it be first understood that I am a god of War and of Vengeance. I shall deal hardly with them.

4. Choose ye an island!

5. Fortify it!

6. Dung it about with enginery of war!

7. I will give you a war-engine.

8. With it ye shall smite the peoples; and none shall stand before you.

9. Lurk! Withdraw! Upon them! this is the Law of the Battle of Conquest: thus shall my worship be about my secret house.

10. Get the stele of revealing itself; set it in thy secret temple -- and that temple is already aright disposed -- & it shall be your Kiblah for ever. It shall not fade, but miraculous colour shall come back to it day after day. Close it in locked glass for a proof to the world.

11. This shall be your only proof. I forbid argument. Conquer! That is enough. I will make easy to you the abstruction from the ill-ordered house in the Victorious City. Thou shalt thyself convey it with worship, o prophet, though thou likest it not. Thou shalt have danger & trouble. Ra-Hoor-Khu is with thee. Worship me with fire & blood; worship me with swords & with spears. Let the woman be girt with a sword before me: let blood flow to my name. Trample down the Heathen; be upon them, o warrior, I will give you of their flesh to eat!

12. Sacrifice cattle, little and big: after a child.

13. But not now.

14. Ye shall see that hour, o blessed Beast, and thou the Scarlet Concubine of his desire!

15. Ye shall be sad thereof.

16. Deem not too eagerly to catch the promises; fear not to undergo the curses. Ye, even ye, know not this meaning all.

17. Fear not at all; fear neither men nor Fates, nor gods, nor anything. Money fear not, nor laughter of the folk folly, nor any other power in heaven or upon the earth or under the earth. Nu is your refuge as Hadit your light; and I am the strength, force, vigour, of your arms.

18. Mercy let be off; damn them who pity! Kill and torture; spare not; be upon them!

19. That stele they shall call the Abomination of Desolation; count well its name, & it shall be to you as 718.

20. Why? Because of the fall of Because, that he is not there again.

21. Set up my image in the East: thou shalt buy thee an image which I will show thee, especial, not unlike the one thou knowest. And it shall be suddenly easy for thee to do this.

22. The other images group around me to support me: let all be worshipped, for they shall cluster to exalt me. I am the visible object of worship; the others are secret; for the Beast & his Bride are they: and for the winners of the Ordeal x. What is this? Thou shalt know.

23. For perfume mix meal & honey & thick leavings of red wine: then oil of Abramelin and olive oil, and afterward soften & smooth down with rich fresh blood.

24. The best blood is of the moon, monthly: then the fresh blood of a child, or dropping from the host of heaven: then of enemies; then of the priest or of the worshippers: last of some beast, no matter what.

25. This burn: of this make cakes & eat unto me. This hath also another use; let it be laid before me, and kept thick with perfumes of your orison: it shall become full of beetles as it were and creeping things sacred unto me.

26. These slay, naming your enemies; & they shall fall before you.

27. Also these shall breed lust & power of lust in you at the eating thereof.

28. Also ye shall be strong in war.

29. Moreover, be they long kept, it is better; for they swell with my force. All before me.

30. My altar is of open brass work: burn thereon in silver or gold!

31. There cometh a rich man from the West who shall pour his gold upon thee.

32. From gold forge steel!

33. Be ready to fly or to smite!

34. But your holy place shall be untouched throughout the centuries: though with fire and sword it be burnt down & shattered, yet an invisible house there standeth, and shall stand until the fall of the Great Equinox; when Hrumachis shall arise and the double-wanded one assume my throne and place. Another prophet shall arise, and bring fresh fever from the skies; another woman shall awakethe lust & worship of the Snake; another soul of God and beast shall mingle in the globed priest; another sacrifice shall stain the tomb; another king shall reign; and blessing no longer be poured To the Hawk-headed mystical Lord!

35. The half of the word of Heru-ra-ha, called Hoor-pa-kraat and Ra-Hoor-Khut.

36. Then said the prophet unto the God:

37. I adore thee in the song -- I am the Lord of Thebes, and I The inspired forth-speaker of Mentu; For me unveils the veiled sky, The self-slain Ankh-af-na-khonsu Whose words are truth. I invoke, I greet Thy presence, O Ra-Hoor-Khuit!

Unity uttermost showed! I adore the might of Thy breath, Supreme and terrible God, Who makest the gods and death To tremble before Thee: -- I, I adore thee!

Appear on the throne of Ra! Open the ways of the Khu! Lighten the ways of the Ka! The ways of the Khabs run through To stir me or still me! Aum! let it fill me!

38. So that thy light is in me; & its red flame is as a sword in my hand to push thy order. There is a secret door that I shall make to establish thy way in all the quarters, (these are the adorations, as thou hast written), as it is said:

The light is mine; its rays consume Me: I have made a secret door Into the House of Ra and Tum, Of Khephra and of Ahathoor. I am thy Theban, O Mentu, The prophet Ankh-af-na-khonsu!

By Bes-na-Maut my breast I beat; By wise Ta-Nech I weave my spell. Show thy star-splendour, O Nuit! Bid me within thine House to dwell, O winged snake of light, Hadit! Abide with me, Ra-Hoor-Khuit!

39. All this and a book to say how thou didst come hither and a reproduction of this ink and paper for ever -- for in it is the word secret & not only in the English -- and thy comment upon this the Book of the Law shall be printed beautifully in red ink and black upon beautiful paper made by hand; and to each man and woman that thou meetest, were it but to dine or to drink at them, it is the Law to give. Then they shall chance to abide in this bliss or no; it is no odds. Do this quickly!

40. But the work of the comment? That is easy; and Hadit burning in thy heart shall make swift and secure thy pen.

41. Establish at thy Kaaba a clerk-house: all must be done well and with business way.

42. The ordeals thou shalt oversee thyself, save only the blind ones. Refuse none, but thou shalt know & destroy the traitors. I am Ra-Hoor-Khuit; and I am powerful to protect my servant. Success is thy proof: argue not; convert not; talk not over much! Them that seek to entrap thee, to overthrow thee, them attack without pity or quarter; & destroy them utterly. Swift as a trodden serpent turn and strike! Be thou yet deadlier than he! Drag down their souls to awful torment: laugh at their fear: spit upon them!

43. Let the Scarlet Woman beware! If pity and compassion and tenderness visit her heart; if she leave my work to toy with old sweetnesses; then shall my vengeance be known. I will slay me her child: I will alienate her heart: I will cast her out from men: as a shrinking and despised harlot shall she crawl through dusk wet streets, and die cold and an-hungered.

44. But let her raise herself in pride! Let her follow me in my way! Let her work the work of wickedness! Let her kill her heart! Let her be loud and adulterous! Let her be covered with jewels, and rich garments, and let her be shameless before all men!

45. Then will I lift her to pinnacles of power: then will I breed from her a child mightier than all the kings of the earth. I will fill her with joy: with my force shall she see & strike at the worship of Nu: she shall achieve Hadit.

46. I am the warrior Lord of the Forties: the Eighties cower before me, & are abased. I will bring you to victory & joy: I will be at your arms in battle & ye shall delight to slay. Success is your proof; courage is your armour; go on, go on, in my strength; & ye shall turn not back for any!

47. This book shall be translated into all tongues: but always with the original in the writing of the Beast; for in the chance shape of the letters and their position to one another: in these are mysteries that no Beast shall divine. Let him not seek to try: but one cometh after him, whence I say not, who shall discover the Key of it all. Then this line drawn is a key: then this circle squared in its failure is a key also. And Abrahadabra. It shall be his child & that strangely. Let him not seek after this; for thereby alone can he fall from it.

48. Now this mystery of the letters is done, and I want to go on to the holier place.

49. I am in a secret fourfold word, the blasphemy against all gods of men.

50. Curse them! Curse them! Curse them!

51. With my Hawk's head I peck at the eyes of Jesus as he hangs upon the cross.

52. I flap my wings in the face of Mohammed & blind him.

53. With my claws I tear out the flesh of the Indian and the Buddhist, Mongol and Din.

54. Bahlasti! Ompehda! I spit on your crapulous creeds.

55. Let Mary inviolate be torn upon wheels: for her sake let all chaste women be utterly despised among you!

56. Also for beauty's sake and love's!

57. Despise also all cowards; professional soldiers who dare not fight, but play; all fools despise!

58. But the keen and the proud, the royal and the lofty; ye are brothers!

59. As brothers fight ye!

60. There is no law beyond Do what thou wilt.

61. There is an end of the word of the God enthroned in Ra's seat, lightening the girders of the soul.

62. To Me do ye reverence! to me come ye through tribulation of ordeal, which is bliss.

63. The fool readeth this Book of the Law, and its comment; & he understandeth it not.

64. Let him come through the first ordeal, & it will be to him as silver.

65. Through the second, gold.

66. Through the third, stones of precious water.

67. Through the fourth, ultimate sparks of the intimate fire.

68. Yet to all it shall seem beautiful. Its enemies who say not so, are mere liars.

69. There is success.

70. I am the Hawk-Headed Lord of Silence & of Strength; my nemyss shrouds the night-blue sky.

71. Hail! ye twin warriors about the pillars of the world! for your time is nigh at hand.

72. I am the Lord of the Double Wand of Power; the wand of the Force of Coph Nia--but my left hand is empty, for I have crushed an Universe; & nought remains.

73. Paste the sheets from right to left and from top to bottom: then behold!

74. There is a splendour in my name hidden and glorious, as the sun of midnight is ever the son.

75. The ending of the words is the Word Abrahadabra.

The Book of the Law is Written

and Concealed.

Aum. Ha.

Love is the law, love under will.

[imagineclaireandjamie]

Shielded. Chapter One

ANON: Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway. [John Wayne]

Since the beginning of lockdown here in the UK, I’ve been making little notes here and there and I’ve finally put something together that is hopefully interesting. It’s set from the start of our isolation back on Friday 20th March and will work its way forwards in time <3 enjoy! Mod MBD.

-- --- --

The Daily Briefing:

She left under the cover of darkness, the atmospheric sheet rain appearing out of nowhere to conceal her as she hid the doorway of a boarded up shop. The ‘closed’ signs that littered the windows of each and every shop on the highstreet illuminated as the lights flickered on, the daylight fading as night enveloped the south of England. It should have been a regular Friday evening, but it wasn’t. And despite the shock of the rest of the nation, she was more than happy for the lockdown to take immediate effect.

A couple of the pubs were still open, the last of their punters being ushered out by groups of policemen and women as the 9pm curfew approached, and though there was still some footfall through the small village, it wasn’t enough to worry her greatly.

She remembered reading YA fiction that started in a similar way and the idea that the whole population might be reduced to some dystopian teen nightmare seemed more than plausible. But at least she’d be far away from society by the time it did. Wondering whether Suzanne Collins and Veronica Roth were somewhere together, raising a glass to their literary insight into such things, she pulled her jacket tighter around her neck to stop the droplets of water running down her chest.

The honk of a horn brought her out of her thoughts as she grabbed her meagre belongings and hid her face from the rain. Getting herself settled in the back of the blacked out van, there was a part of her that scoffed at the idea of danger lurking within as the plain-clothed officers escorting her smiled softly, passing her a towel to wipe the stray drips of moisture from her face. As a child she had, of course, been warned about strangers in vehicles. Now though there were more monsters lurking in her own home than there were anywhere else in the country.

“You might want to get some sleep, if you can, miss.” One of the younger officers said, breaking the silence even with his moderately quiet statement. “It’s a long drive, we’re aiming for eight hours if we can, but it will all depend on the roads.”

Nodding, she pulled a woolen blanket from one of her bags, removed her coat and curled herself against the window. Though she thought sleep impossible, she did manage to doze a little as the car made its way towards the motorway. Her mind went blank as they sped up, she’d spent weeks agonising over this choice, the solid notion of it taking root in her subconscious as the country seemed to spin towards chaos and confusion.

The virus, however, had not been her primary concern. Only her mental and physical survival had taken precedent. It was the prime minister's announcement yesterday that schools and pubs would close the following week that spurred her onwards, and she’d (rather rapidly) responded to the offer she had been levelled with.

If she wanted to disappear, now was her chance.

“John wants you to know that he’s processed the documents you’re going to need and included a shielding letter with that. This should take you until the end of June as well as the furlough payments. He also says you did the right thing.”

Making incomplete thumps against her chest, her heart stopped for a moment as the police officer spoke. She’d been warring with herself for weeks, uncertain of the best course of action. She had, of course, lived with the increasing threat for years before it had finally erupted. John had seen the outcome and had begged her to reconsider his previous offer of assistance having watched her descend into a less than perfect relationship. But she had been convinced that she’d be able to manage.

She hadn’t. An obvious change had taken hold of her husband. He wasn’t the man she married, not by a long shot, and as 2019 came to a close, so did any of his positive attributes. He was a professor, a professional man with many books to his name and he refused to believe his actions had become that of a less than ideal partner.

The first stay in hospital, however, stated otherwise.

“Will I be able to speak to him?”

The officer shook his head sadly. “No, if this is to work, you have to sever all contact with anyone you previously knew, even John. Anything that puts you at risk or could enlighten the wrong people into knowing your whereabouts would jeopardize all of the work we’ve all put in to assure your safety.”

Having had the mood suitably dulled, she lay her head against the window and let several hundred miles pass her by.  

As they crossed the border around midnight, the rain finally began to ease and she smiled at the irony. She hadn’t spent much time in Scotland, but she knew it wasn’t famous for its notoriously glorious weather. Part of her was desperate for some coffee but the further they travelled up the country, the less likely it was that the service stations were 24 hours - nor did she think her drivers would be willing to stop until they’d reached their destination.

Once off the motorway and onto the single track roads that led them further into the highlands, she started to guess at where their final destination might be. When the proposition had first been offered to her, John had given her a number of options of a safe haven - one being a flight away (by that point he had started to take her safety quite seriously). As the grey scenery passed them by, a slight pinking of the sky signalling that dawn was close, she was trying to recall the names of the places he’d suggested though her mind was as much of a blur as the greenery whooshing by the back window.

“I don’t suppose you have anything caffeinated to drink?” She asked. 

Reaching forward, she took the unopened bottle of coke from one of her escorts and relaxed back into her seat.

“Not far away now. There aren't any toilets, though.”

Fatigue was running deep, she could tell by the tiredness in his voice as he spoke and she nodded as she took a sip. The warning was clear; drink it all quickly and there would be no stopping for a break. But she was too thirsty to worry too much.

“Can I ask where we’re going?”

“Just north-west of Inverness. It’s a farm so it’s as remote as they come. It’s single occupancy, the guy who lives there runs his family business. He’s an old contact of John’s, so although there is to be no contact between you, he trusts you’re in safe hands. All shopping is pre organised and will be delivered once every two weeks to ensure neither of you are put at risk leaving the property for supplies.”

“Should I leave the house at all?” At this point she couldn’t tell whether she was being sarcastic or not but there was an honesty to her question that made the officers answer her quickly.

“No. You have your letter, not that there is anyone around to ask for it, but for the next 12 weeks you should remain inside at all times. No matter how far we take you away from civilization there is always the risk - even during a national pandemic and lockdown - of someone being around, seeing you and passing it on. Where we’re taking you, the owner hasn’t had another friend or family on the property for a number of years. Small communities talk so you should stay inside and out of the view of any members of the local village.”

“Noted.” Replying sadly, she replaced the cap on the half finished bottle of cola and ran her fingers along the inside of her leg. The scar there was still fresh, the heat of it making the hairs on her arms stand on end. She knew that if she wanted this to work, if she wanted to remain hidden, then she would have to obey the rules set.

They drove through Inverness just as 5am hit and the sun rose across the extensive lochs and mountains.

“It might seem far-fetched, the idea that you’ll be located, but we can’t take the risk. We did look through your file, though, and found a name we hope has some resonance to you.” *but nobody else* he thought, but did not say.

“Thank you, I really appreciate it. Please pass that on to John, I didn’t even get the chance to tell him how grateful I am. For everything.” Her intrigue had been piqued about her new identity but once she knew who she was going to be for the next few weeks, it would all become real. Whilst they still hadn’t arrived, she could sit and pretend to be existing in an in between - half way between fantasy and reality.

As they pulled off one side-road and onto another her driver passed her an envelope. She could see a small smile lift the side of his mouth as an archway came into view in front of them. “Of course I will, Claire.”

“Claire?”

“Yes,” he returned, bringing his arm up and pointing his finger at the brown packet in her hands, “it’s all in there...the rest of it. Read it, keep the ID documentation and then burn anything you don’t need to use later.”

“Claire.” She whispered to herself.

And in one breath, as a rather large white brick farm house appeared beneath the now large ivy coated arch, Elizabeth Randall died and she instantly became Claire Beauchamp.

[house-of-1000-corpses]

241 songs bangers for any occasion

1.MASTODON - Blood and Thunder 03:48 2.RED FANG - Wires 05:43 3.DYING FETUS - Second Skin 04:42 4.OBITUARY - Sentence Day 02:49 5.DEATH - Pull The Plug 04:26 6.AMORPHIS - Black Winter Day 03:50 7.MYRKUR - Leaves of Yggdrasil 04:00 8.NOTHING - Say Less 04:15 9.TORCHE - Admission 04:00 10.BARONESS - March to the Sea 03:11 11.THE DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN - 43% Burnt 04:31 12.PIG DESTROYER - Trojan Whore 01:34 13.NASUM - Scoop 02:21 14.NILE - Cast Down The Heretic 05:45 15.SUFFOCATION - Catatonia 03:55 16.INCANTATION - Entrails of the Hag Queen 04:33 17.NEUROSIS - Through Silver In Blood 12:11 18.HIGH ON FIRE - Blessed Black Wings 07:43 19.YOB - Ablaze 10:13 20.WINDHAND - Diablerie 05:20 21.MONOLORD - THE LAST LEAF 05:14 22.BONGZILLA - Amerijuanican 06:46 23.GATECREEPER - From The Ashes 03:59 24.EXHUMED - Ravenous Cadavers 01:49 25.FULL OF HELL - Burning Myrrh 02:12 26.INTEGRITY - Hymn, For The Children of the Black Flame 02:16 27.GISM - Endless Blockades For The Pussyfooter 03:46 28.CONTROL DENIED - Expect The Unexpected 07:16 29.NECROPHAGIST - Only Ash Remains 04:11 30.OBSCURA - The Anticosmic Overload 04:16 31.REVOCATION - The Grip Tightens 04:10 32.GRUESOME - A Waste of Life 06:00 33.ZOMBI - Breakthrough & Conquer 03:46 34.GENGHIS TRON - Board Up The House 05:54 35.SURVIVE - A.H.B. 04:25 36.THE ALBUM LEAF - Ambo 04:53 37.CEREMONY - Turn Away The Bad Thing 04:02 38.BORIS WITH MERZBOW - Away From You 07:35 39.ROYAL THUNDER - Parsonz Curse 06:57 40.KING WOMAN - Hierophant 07:59 41.CLOAKROOM - Seedless Star 07:37 42.AUTHOR & PUNISHER - The Speaker Is Systematically Broken 04:14 43.DISFEAR - Deadweight 02:52 44.IRON REAGAN - A Dying World 02:24 45.TOXIC HOLOCAUST - Nuke The Cross 02:47 46.CANDY - Super-Stare 04:01 47.RINGWORM - Death Becomes My Voice 05:19 48.INTER ARMA - Citadel 06:40 49.PRIMITIVE MAN - Menacing 08:00 50.UNEARTHLY TRANCE - Famine 06:14 51.LYCUS - Solar Chamber 10:41 52.DEVOURMENT - Cognitive Sedation Butchery 04:53 53.SKINLESS - The Optimist 05:42 54.DEVIL MASTER - Black Flame Candle 02:46 55.OUTER HEAVEN - Bloodspire 04:15 56.GENOCIDE PACT - Conquered and Disposed 04:37 57.COFFINS - Hour of Execution 04:55 58.MAMMOTH GRINDER - Superior Firepower 02:38 59.LIVING GATE - Heaven Ablaze 03:35 60.REPULSION - Maggots In Your Coffin 01:45 61.AGORAPHOBIC NOSEBLEED - Agorapocalypse Now 02:25 62.MISERY INDEX - Fed To The Wolves 03:47 63.MORTICIAN - Rabid 02:01 64.BRUTAL TRUTH - Sugardaddy 02:36 65.HUMAN REMAINS - Rote 03:31 66.-(16)- - Me and the Dog Die Together 03:05 67.ALABAMA THUNDERPUSSY - Motor-Ready 04:21 68.ASG - Avalanche 04:17 69.CEPHALIC CARNAGE - Endless Cycle Of Violence 04:14 70.CHERUBS - Sooey Pig 04:44 71.COUGH - Haunter of the Dark 07:50 72.CRIPPLE BASTARDS - Non Coinvolto 02:04 73.DISEMBOWELMENT - Your Prophetic Throne Of Ivory 07:40 74.EX EYE - Opposition/Perihelion; The Coil 12:29 75.GADGET - Pillars Of Filth 01:20 76.GRAVES AT SEA - The Curse That Is 11:14 77.HAEMORRHAGE - WE ARE THE GORE 02:15 78.HORSEBACK - Mithras 05:04 79.ILSA - SHIBBOLETH 02:39 80.INDIAN - The Impetus Bleeds 06:40 81.INVERLOCH - Distance Collapsed (In Rubble) 08:39 82.IRON MONKEY - Crown of Electrodes 04:21 83.JOHN FRUM - Presage of Emptiness 04:47 84.LOCRIAN - Arc of Extinction 07:16 85.MARUTA - Hope Smasher 02:19 86.MIRACLE - Light Mind 04:49 87.THE OBSESSED - Sodden Jackal 04:23 88.PINKISH BLACK - Concept Unification 05:13 89.PUBLICIST UK - Slow Dancing To This Bitter Earth 03:36 90.RWAKE - Leviticus 07:17 91.SUMERLANDS - The Seventh Seal 03:46 92.TERMINAL BLISS - Clean Bill of Wealth 00:51 93.TRAPPIST - Victims Of A Bomber Raid 01:38 94.TRUE WIDOW - Four Teeth 06:16 95.WEEKEND NACHOS - Jock Powerviolence 01:23 96.WRONG - Culminate 02:33 97.USNEA - Lathe of Heaven 09:44 98.VICTIMS - The Horse And Sparrow Theory 03:41 99.ZEKE - Two Lane Blacktop 01:37 100.ZONAL - System Error -ft. Moor Mother 04:06 101.ARCADEA - Infinite End 03:28 102.BLACK SALVATION - In A Casket's Ride 07:03 103.BRAIN TENTACLES - Fruitcake 02:35 104.ABSCESS - Naked Freak Show 01:15 105.ABYSMAL DAWN - Inanimate 04:15 106.AGENDA OF SWINE - Gethsemane 01:08 107.ANAL CUNT - Radio Hit 01:11 108.ANATOMY OF HABIT - Radiate and Recede 20:11 109.ANTIGAMA - Pursuit 01:16 110.ATRIARCH - Entropy 05:53 111.BEDEMON - Child Of Darkness 04:12 112.BENUMB - Once And Never Again 01:00 113.BIRDS OF PREY - Hustling the Coroner To Overlook the Strychnine 03:27 114.BLACK ANVIL - May Her Wrath Be Just 04:25 115.BLACK TUSK - Bring Me Darkness 03:05 116.BLOOD DUSTER - Porn Store Stiffi 01:33 117.BLOODIEST - BROKEN TEETH 07:31 118.BRIAN POSEHN - Cuddling 03:55 119.BROUGHTON'S RULES - Reversers 03:50 120.BURIED INSIDE - IV 06:07 121.BURNT BY THE SUN - Soundtrack To The Worst Movie Ever 02:32 122.BURST - Where The Wave Broke 03:36 123.BUZZOVEN - Mainline 05:30 124.CALL OF THE VOID - Bottom Feeder 01:42 125.CAR BOMB - Gum Under The Table 03:27 126.CHRIS CONNELLY - Wait For Amateur 02:05 127.CIRCLE OF ANIMALS - No Faith 04:21 128.CHRISTIAN MISTRESS - Over & Over 02:41 129.COALESCE - Have Patience 03:11 130.COLDWORKER - The Interloper 02:38 131.COLISEUM - Defeater 02:01 132.COLUMNS - Mudfucker 01:18 133.CRETIN - Ghost of Teeth and Hair 03:54 134.CRYPTIC SLAUGHTER - Lowlife 02:32 135.CULTED - BROODING HEX 19:13 136.DAVIE ALLAN - Buzz Saw Effect 02:36 137.DAYLIGHT DIES - Four Corners 08:11 138.DEAD WORLD - The Machine 08:06 139.DEATH BREATH - Death Breath 02:55 140.DEKAPITATOR - The Storm Before the Calm 06:39 141.DISRUPT - Domestic Prison 02:00 142.DON CABALLERO - Railroad Cancellation 05:16 143.DUKATALON - ZX 06:23 144.DYSRHYTHMIA - Appeared at First 03:06 145.EAST WEST BLAST TEST - Magnetic Field 00:51 146.ECSTATIC VISION - Don't Kill The Vibe 05:00 147.EMBALMER - There Was Blood Everywhere 01:51 148.ENEMY SOIL - Sentencing 01:39 149.EXIT-13 - When I Get Low, I Get High 02:36 150.EXPULSION - Altar of Slaughter 01:43 151.FACEDOWNINSHIT - NPON 04:19 152.FATHER BEFOULED - Sacrilegious Defilement of Deranged Salvation 03:20 153.FLESH PARADE - Backstabber 01:14 154.FUCK THE FACTS - The Wrecking 04:39 155.GENERAL SURGERY - Slithering Maceration Of Ulcerous Facial Tissue 01:11 156.GENOCIDE SUPERSTARS - Hatestomp 03:08 157.GOD MACABRE - Lost 04:01 158.GOBLIN REBIRTH - Requiem for X 04:16 159.GRAVES OF VALOR - Suffocation of the Last King 03:45 160.HAIL! HORNET - Beast Of Bourbon 03:11 161.HARVEY MILK - The Anvil Will Fall 07:34 162.HALO - Buried In Light 04:37 163.HEMDALE - Delicious Gory Fun 01:11 164.HERO DESTROYED - That's An Axe 03:27 165.HOODED MENACE - Elysium Of Dripping Death 11:33 166.HOPE DRONE - Riverbeds Hewn in Marrow 10:39 167.HOWL - Horns Of Steel 03:26 168.HUMAN REMAINS - Weeding Out The Thorns 02:37 169.INEVITABLE END - The Severed Inception 04:04 170.JOEL GRIND - The Invisible Landscape 02:12 171.JUCIFER - Blackpowder 02:16 172.KARABOUDJAN - Den Svarta Ön 07:32 173.KILL THE CLIENT - Vicious Slaughter 01:06 174.KINGDOM OF SORROW - Enlightened To Extinction 03:47 175.KRIEG - CIRCLE OF GUILT 05:20 176.LENG TCH'E - The Fist of the Leng Tch'e 01:50 177.LIBERTEER - Build No System 01:34 178.LOOKING FOR AN ANSWER - Tapias De Cementerio 02:07 179.LORD DYING - POISONED ALTARS 03:47 180.LULL - Moment 1 01:08 181.MAGRUDERGRIND - Sacrificial Hire 01:32 182.MAN MUST DIE - Kill It Skin It Wear It 04:18 183.MANTAS - Evil Dead (Death By Metal Demo) 03:22 184.MERZBOW - Woodpecker No. 1 06:43 185.MINDROT - Anguish 07:11 186.MINSK - Within And Without 07:57 187.MORGION - The Serpentine Scrolls 10:33 188.MORTA SKULD - Sacrificial Rite 03:26 189.MOSE GIGANTICUS - The Left Path 04:13 190.MUMAKIL - Brothers in Slavery 01:20 191.MURDER CONSTRUCT - Compelled by Mediocrity 02:44 192.N2K2 - Mourning 03:54 193.NOISEAR - Inevitable Extinction 01:00 194.NUM SKULL - Ritually Abused 04:27 195.NUX VOMICA - Sanity Is For The Passive 12:40 196.OBLITERATION - Goat Skull Crown 04:40 197.OPPROBRIUM - Voices From The Grave 03:23 198.ORIGIN - Finite 03:08 199.PAN.THY.MONIUM - The Battle Of Geeheeb 11:55 200.PENTAGRAM - Forever My Queen 02:25 201.PHOBIA - Rehashed 01:05 202.POISON BLOOD - The Scourge and the Gestalt 03:40 203.PRIMATE - Draw Back A Stump 01:26 204.PUTRID PILE - The Satisfying Dead 02:50 205.PYRRHON - Balkanized 04:46 206.RABBITS - A Tale Of Tales 04:44 207.RAZOR - Hypertension 03:19 208.REGURGITATE - Putrid Serenity 01:44 209.ROTTEN SOUND - Superior 01:28 210.RUMPELSTILTSKIN GRINDER - Grab a Shovel (We've Got Bodies to Bury) 04:51 211.SATAN'S SATYRS - Succubus 03:40 212.SAYYADINA - Their Control 01:04 213.SCOTT HULL - Il funerale di Bonnie 03:47 214.SACRILEGE - Shadow From Mordor 04:50 215.SERPENTINE PATH - Essence Of Heresy 03:47 216.SOILENT GREEN - It Was Just An Accident 04:12 217.SPAWN OF POSSESSION - Apparition 08:24 218.STEVE MOORE - It's Complicated 02:41 219.SUBARACHNOID SPACE - A 09:16 220.TERMINAL SOUND SYSTEM - Silt 06:43 221.THE COUNTY MEDICAL EXAMINERS - Morgagnic Anatomics 04:14 222.THE END - Throwing Stones 03:29 223.THE GREAT TYRANT - Closing In 07:42 224.THE HIGH CONFESSIONS - Chlorine And Crystal 09:35 225.TITAN - Wooded Altar Beyond The Wander 08:00 226.TOMBS - Merrimack 03:56 227.TRIAL OF THE BOW - Father of the Flower 04:07 228.TRIBES OF NEUROT - Primordial Uncarved Block 06:24 229.ULCERATE - ABROGATION 05:50 230.ULTRAMANTIS BLACK - Prescription Culture 01:04 231.UNKIND - Vihan Lapset 02:45 232.UPHILL BATTLE - Ripped Off Face 03:29 233.VVEREVVOLF GREHV - Audio Processor 04:45 234.VIDNA OBMANA - The Insane Brightness 05:33 235.VIRAL LOAD - Methlab Machete Massacre 03:07 236.VOIVOD - God Phones 05:07 237.WEAPON - Vanguard Of The Morning Star 04:19 238.WOLVSERPENT - Within the Light of Fire 16:24 239.BASTARD NOISE, SICKNESS - Death's Door 16:09 240.PSYWARFARE - Au Regal Des Voraces 20:02 241.THE SOUL REBELLION ORCHESTRA - DOLEMITE 03:01

[bi-the-way-i-love-bunnies]

(AU where Harry’s assigned as Draco Malfoy’s bodyguard. He’s very reluctant) 

Drarry drabbles ~ 10/28

“Cho,” Harry dropped the file onto his coworker’s desk, “What the fuck is this?” 

She put down her paperwork and faced him calmly, like she had prepared for this conversation. Fuck, she was probably the one that suggested he’d take this case to their boss, the meddlesome witch. 

“Out of everyone at this company, you’re the best worker here, Harry,” she patiently explained, “ Your success rates show that you outrank second place by a whole fifteen percent, and with a high profile client like this, we need our best on it.” 

Harry glared at her. “Since when was Malfoy ever considered a high profile client?”

Cho just grabbed her coffee mug in response, taking a sip before shrugging. “Beats me, he was a right twat in school. But the public sure loves favoring the redeemed don’t they?”

On cue, she pulled out a magazine from the file earlier. And there on the cover appeared Malfoy, in all his blonde posh glory, smirking at the camera (an expression Harry knew all too well) before the blonde sent the audience a seductive look. He turned slightly and tilted his head a little, slowly trailing a lazy arm down the side of his body, his tongue peaking out and swiping over his plush, pink lips. Harry flushed slightly as photo Malfoy looked him in the eyes and gave him a wink (if the real Malfoy knew, he’d probably start crying at the betrayal). 

Harry cleared his throat in an attempt to cover up what has become too long for just examining evidence. Cho gave him a teasing smile, but said nothing. Small mercies he supposed. 

“The boss knows all about your past history together. Despite everything, he still thinks you’ll be perfect for the case, and that’s saying something.” 

She had more to say, he knew she did. He waited for her to continue after she realized what he was anticipating.  

Just like he suspected, she bit her lip (one of her tells) before sighing. “He may have also already contacted Malfoy telling him you’ll be working for him.” 

“What? Cho!” She raised her hands in defense. 

“He needed a response from us within 24 hours! The boss couldn’t just leave him waiting,” she said it like Harry hasn’t made Malfoy work for anything before, “He knew you’re more than capable of handling this.” 

“If you’re implying that he gave this to me on a whim you’re clearly wrong,” Harry rolled his eyes, “Everyone knows he favors you and Lawrence most, and I just got back from that Morocco case. He wouldn’t have assigned this to me that fast. At least, not without interference.” 

‘Are you implying that I had something to do with this?” she gave him a seemingly innocent look. He knew better. They worked together for six years after all. 

He gave her a playful shove, “Don’t try pulling that act on me! Innocence doesn’t suit you, Cho. At least not with our job.”

“Touché.” She gathered the magazine back into the file before handing it back to Harry, a clear dismissal. 

“And Harry?” she called just before he left the office. “You’re not as good as hiding your magazine subscriptions as you think.” 

He flushed and hurriedly closed the door to her office, but not without hearing another comment, “Next time a witch needs to look through your desk files, might want to use a locking charm yeah?” 

He heard her cackling as he moved down the hallway, his coworkers shooting him weird looks as he went. 

***

Malfoy flooed at just past 1 am that same day. Harry has been anticipating the call of course, but it was rather late. If he wasn’t finishing up the last of his Morocco reports, he would’ve already gone to bed. 

“Malfoy,” Harry greeted. The prat looked the same, if not slightly amused. At what, Harry didn’t know. It has been ten years since their last interaction, just after the war. And although the newspaper and gossip rags reported on the two of them almost constantly, it wasn’t the same as meeting face to face. 

“Potter, surprised you took the job,” he teased, although Harry must’ve heard him wrong. Malfoy never teased him before, and the concept was a strange and foreign one. 

“Yeah, well,” he flushed, “If you must know, my boss actually accepted the case on my behalf before I even heard about it. Poor Cho had to break in the surprise for me.” 

Malfoy’s expression dimmed somewhat at that, and the small smirk from earlier faded a little, “I see.” Was Malfoy acting...disappointed? Harry dismissed those thoughts instantly. 

“Anyways,” he continued on, once the moment got a tad too awkward, “I’m surprised it took you so long to call. You know some people like having a sleep schedule right?” 

Malfoy waved his hand, “There was a shoot late at night, some sort of ad I was hired to model in. The setting they needed had perfect lighting and weather at ten this evening. But by the time we were done, it was well beyond the time frame they would’ve liked.” 

“And you didn’t think to call earlier?” 

Malfoy rolled his eyes, “Yes, we’re so eager to talk with one another, aren’t we? I’m sure if we wanted to keep in touch for all these years we would’ve done so by now. And it’s not like I don’t see you everyday! All the newspapers and magazines show your face everywhere. Do you have any idea what it’s like to have to be subjected to that so much?” 

Harry did know, actually, but he wasn’t going to admit that out loud. A resort was on the tip of his tongue, but he held it in. Now wasn’t the time to argue. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration instead. 

“Let’s just cut the small talk alright? Just tell me what I need to know. The basics are on your file but there was not much else.” 

Malfoy straightened, professional mask in place. “There’s this show in Milan held every year that features the most exclusive, upcoming designers and models. A friend called in a favor because recently many of the models in the show have been making mysterious disappearances. The aurors over there have been working on it, but they don’t have many leads, making the situation difficult and the participants weary. And normally with all the risks, I wouldn’t attend, but like I said, I was called in for a favor.”

“And you couldn’t just say no?” Harry couldn’t help but question. Malfoy surprised him by snorting.

“As if I would’ve said no to helping Pansy. Besides, as much as this situation could potentially affect me, this is the first year she’s been invited as an actual designer instead of some company intern or something. If this goes well, she has the potential to make it big.” Harry stared, processing Malfoy’s words.

“Pansy? As in Pansy Parkinson?” The name caught him off guard. Holy Merlin, he did not sign up for two Slytherins. One he could deal with, specifically if that happened to be Draco Malfoy. But another snake? Cho was going to seriously regret heading in for work tomorrow. 

“Yes, Potter. You’re not the only one willing to risk a limb, or in this case, a body to help out a friend,” he rolled his eyes, “Now is that all? Because I have to get up rather early for another event tomorrow. And as enlightening as this reunion has been, I don’t think I could put up with you for a second longer.”

Harry nodded in agreement. “The same could be said for you. You know standard procedures yes?” 

“Obviously, Potter. Company terms and all that. I’ll let you know more details tomorrow, say, around noon?” 

“Sounds good. Floo me if you need.” 

And with that the floo call ended. Harry sighed in relief.

The more he got involved with the case, the more he wanted to back out. Honestly, what was Cho thinking? Simple magazine subscriptions were one thing, but two Slytherins and a fashion show in Milan? Harry doesn’t fucking know anything about fashion. And better yet, he simply didn't care for it at all (however, if it was featured in an ad starring a certain posh blonde, well, maybe you could convince him to change his mind). One thing Harry knew for sure, he was definitely screwed. And on another note, he had a former Ravenclaw to kill, but he’ll save that for later.

[blacksunscorpio]

Hi! Omg i love your blog and I feel like you might have soom good insight on this: Do you know how I can become more enlightened? I've bought so man decks, gotten so many readings, I watch so many Youtube videos on spirituality the craft, and astrology and placed a shipment for almost every crystal known to man but don't feel any closer to the divine. Am I doing something wrong? How do I make the best out of all these tools?

Hmmmm... my love, I hate to say this but it sounds like you may be suffering from what is termed as “Spiritual Materialism.”

What is Spiritual Materialism?

It’s the phenomenon that happens when we use spiritual concepts, doctrines, practices, and tools to reinforce the false sense of self, the ego. 

But being free of the ego is the very definition of spiritual enlightenment. I won’t lie, I think we’ve all suffered from it at one point or another. I know I have. so here are some tips to identify whether or not you may be a victim of this mindset.

 1. Being a constant shopper in “spiritual marketplaces”

.... this includes chasing or being thirsty for endless workshops, methods, tools, talismans, and techniques which all promise to make you a wiser, more intuitive, more at peace or blissful, person. These shopping sprees can get out of control very fast. Now there’s nothing wrong with wanting to educate yourself, or simply being curious [I was a double major in history and international studies, I get it, lol] but we have to remember that the acquisition of these things in an attempt to become more awakened can become more of an addiction than anything else. It’ll also hurt your pockets.

 

2. “Grass is Greener Syndrome” or “Future Obsessive Compulsion”

Or believing “if I just do this” or “if only I was in *insert Nirvana-esque location here*” that one can get to an ‘elevated state’ in the future. “I’ll be better than who I am now. I’ll be my best.” This causes one to forget the present. To neglect the good already in them. Dwelling on dreams and forgetting to live. It may seem ambitious but it is fundamentally egocentric.

3. Being a “Spiritual Influencer”

Also known as “InstaSpirituality”. These are the types to focus on aesthetically pleasing spiritual practices, things that are Tik-Tok-able or Snapchat/Insta worthy. Spirituality that is used strictly for social capital/gain when there is no sincere desire to really delve into the deeper, messier, Tower-like moments that often walk hand in hand with spiritual awakenings. These moments are typically not ones you want to catch on camera.

4. Spiritual cultural appropriation

Using words, practices, ways of life of cultures other than your own for profit/self-image or self-gain only and not because you truly respect them honor them or even attempted to understand them. We must remember that every culture on earth has a deep and rich history and it is disrespectful to use what others find sacred as a boomerang on your social media feed.

5. Focusing solely on the “positive”

I know this sounds like it should be a good thing but what we have to understand is that humans and the universe as a whole are only balanced with light and dark. Yin and Yang. You cannot have one without the other. Focusing only on “high vibes” or “love and light” creates illusion. It creates a false world so that the ego avoids the reality of its own shadow. In fact, your shadow exists to protect you. That urge you get to defend yourself when you’re attacked by an insult or a sudden ‘left-hook’. That boil in your belly when you see someone getting buck with you and you wish to retaliate. The black and blue balls you give the asshole harassing you in the club after kneeing him in them is your shadow self protecting your conscious/physical-self. This is your basic instinct, as they call it. The basic self will act primarily to preserve the body. It will resist anything that will harm or hurt the body or that will cause destruction to itself  You have to embrace it. You have to work with both and not let one run rough-shod over the other.

6. Spiritual Elitism

Or using spiritual achievements, lineage, gifts, etc to feel superior or disconnect from others. The types who cultivate spiritual resumes [a list of all the important people they’ve met, certifications they have or abilities they claim to own] to impress themselves and others. I also call this spiritual narcissism. This is actually what ends up being the result of spiritual materialism. The ego becomes elephantine. So big and so impervious that it not only consciously believes it is more “awakened” but it will do anything to reinforce this [typically false] narrative. Included but not limited to harming others through arrogance, narcissism, and at it’s worst physical harm. These individuals typically suffer from insecurities themselves. Often you find these individuals within organized religious sectors, yes [Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, etc] but they can also be found in the Divining, Astro, Witch & Reiki community as well. These are the modern-day equivalents of Slytherins and their “pure-blood” nonsense. Believing everyone else to be of dirty-blood or less than. Of course, there is nothing wrong with being proud of your heritage, gifts, or things you simply worked hard for. Especially in a world that makes you believe being proud of yourself or your culture [especially if you’re not white] is a sin and self-deprecation and humility are admirable [they’re not.] But are you really enlightened if you do not allow others the same grace to work towards what you believe you’ve achieved? The point is to not be judgmental, but instead to be aware and compassionate with ourselves and others.

7. Self-Improvement addiction

Hopping around from teacher to teacher, guru to guru in your attempt to become more healed, more awakened, more in touch with the supernatural. Practicing meditation with the agenda to avoid any feeling and/or suffering by being detached on a 24-hour basis. The reality is, these practices are more harmful than helpful. You need your emotions. They’re what make you human. And the inconvenient truth is that they are always fluctuating [water signs, I know you hear me on this]. In your attempt to improve yourself constantly, you’re reinforcing the negative mindset that you are somehow “broken” and need to be “fixed” and as a result, you are never happy.

In essence

Spiritual materialism is what occurs when spirituality feeds the ego and the ego greedily sucks it all in. When we take something Divine and try to possess it as our own. When we are fuelled with ego-centric or self-serving motives. Again, we all have this tendency, so there’s nothing to be ashamed of. I myself have suffered from No. 2 and No. 7 the most. Now that you all know some of the symptoms, can you be honest with yourself? How many of these can you relate to? What steps will you take to be more aware and adjust some of these habits? It may be hard to admit but as they say in AA, the first step is acceptance, of yourself and your flaws. 

[annashallow]

The Influence of Social Media on My Life

It's no question that since the start of Covid-19, society has been more reliant on technology and social media than ever to stay connected to one another and learn about what's going on in the world around them. But how much does social media affect our day-to-day lives? On Wednesday, September 8th, I conducted an experiment where I created a social media use log. In this log, I kept track of numerous different interactions I made with social media throughout 24 hours. Within these 24 hours, I recorded the number of times I looked down at my smartwatch, the number of texts/ Snapchats/ GroupMe messages I received, the number of hours I spent working at my laptop, the number of times I had checked my watch or phone specifically during class, and how many hours I spent watching TikToks.

After I collected all my preliminary data, I created an experiment to increase self-awareness regarding how much social media is integrated into my everyday life. The experiment I conducted took place on Friday, September 10th. On this day, I committed to not using technology such as my smartwatch, phone, and laptop for three designated six-hour periods throughout the day. These six-hour increments were from 2:00 AM to 8:00 AM, 9:00 AM to 3:00 PM and 4:00 PM to 10:00 PM. These six-hour increments were strategically chosen to challenge me at times during the day where I would use my phone the most. For example, I could not use my phone when I first woke up in the morning or just before bed. I also picked Friday because I had the least amount of responsibilities I needed to complete that required me being in front of a screen, such as my job on campus.

Between every six hours increment, I recorded my thoughts, feelings, and responses to not utilizing social media. I found that not being able to use my phone became increasingly harder throughout the day. During the hours between my 6-hour increments when I could use my phone, I found myself overwhelmed by the number of messages, alerts, and notifications that had piled up. I also found myself unknowingly looking to my nonexistent watch to see what time it was and if I had any messages.

Overall, I found the experiment enlightening. This experiment allowed me to become more self-aware of my reliance on social media to fill the slower parts of my day. I also found that I felt more inclined to reach out to the people around me for social interaction and became more aware of my surroundings. While it can be challenging as a college student with classes and involvements primarily online due to covid-19, I think it is crucial than ever to take time away from social media and learn to live in the moment and reconnect with people outside of behind a screen.