#Anyway its just a joke!!✨✨

[oyakay]

HERE @deerla-charming inspiration🥺🥰

I COULDN'T HELP BUT DRAW THIS LOLL!! OH MY GOD, I LOVE ITTTT🤭💖💖💖💖💖

THIS IS A VERY CRAZY CROSSOVER..! XDD~~💕💕 ANYWAY, IT WAS FUNNY AND CUTE🤭💗💗💗

[widevibratobitch]

.

[pizzaapeteer]

Watch your mouth

Request: What just happened? Doesn't matter, it doesn't change us." "Oh, sure, my tongue in your mouth does nothing for our relationship, got it." "Keep talking and you won't have that tongue."

Warnings: NSFW, semi hj, PnV, hair pulling, dirty talk, finger licking, swearing, drinking, hufflepuff reader, a bit stereotypical Hufflepuff, 4.1k

AN: Massive thank you for everyone being so patience!!! I kind of realised while writing this that maybe enemies to lovers trope isn't my thing. Happy for feedback as this was my first piece on that. But anyway I loved coming up with this idea with special help to @slytherinslut0 & @mattyriddlesbitch based off the prompt here, thank you for the request. I hope you like it ✨🥹. Also big thanks to all other muts involved in helping me 💞. love you all. pretty divider from here

The atmosphere was high, waves of euphoric tingles warm your body, the beginning of your tipsiness engulfing you. Perched on the ledge of a couch arm, your legs swing softly out in front of you as you lean back, enjoying the lightness of them, eyes gazing around following the movement of people. 

Throngs of different houses scattered amongst the darkly lit emerald common room, the music cranking loudly, bodies swaying, pushing past each other, made for an entertaining view. Your ears prick, briefly tuning into your friends' conversations as they sat surrounding you emerged in some type of party game. 

The sweet liquor soothed its way into your bloodstream, each sip adding to your intoxication, surprisingly finding yourself enjoying tonight's events. You had been dragged along to the Slytherins house with verbal protest not interested in mingling among the snakes. It was honestly a revelation you had been allowed in, considering your friendship with many Gryffindor and their ongoing rivalry with the Slytherins. As well as the fact, it was your enemies' friends who were hosting the party. 

The darkness looming over the dungeons was surprisingly pleasant though, lit with an ambient glow by the surrounding candles. Shades of green covered the walls, pristine artwork hung delicately on them, many figures of old ages turning their noses up at the contiguous houses in their beloved homes. 

Sipping on the beverage, you found yourself relaxed, dazed at finding yourself to be enjoying tonight's events. Fortunately for you, the absence of one Mattheo Riddle tonight has helped put you at ease. Though his whereabouts were odd considering the rest of his popular pack were spread out, immersing themselves amongst the crowds. You were thankful nethertheless, not exactly in the mood for having to deal with him and his constant insufferable presence. 

Short-tempered, arrogant, with no lack of respect or remorse for anyone else's feelings, starting unnecessary fights just for the heck of it. Him and his posy certainly had a reputation that followed them, having no care in the world except for themselves. This was how most of the school felt about him and his group, except for the pack of desperate girls wanting to throw themselves at another bad decision. 

As a hufflefpuff, your house was often a target by many other houses, always falling short compared to Slytherin. Not that as a hufflepuff you yourself believed this, your house had many strengths, loyal, hardworking, fierce, great navigators. Though it didn’t stop the others from seeing your house as below. Often the butt of jokes, the victims of pranks, that are mostly harmless, and just straight up demeaning and belittling verbal bullying. 

Conveniently for you, you’d come from a family of people who actually taught you to grow a bloody backbone and not stand for less. Which meant you weren’t easily thrown off guard when being targeted. You assumed this was the root of why Mattheo targeted you. A sore in his thumb, that one needle in the hack stack that was never found.

You knew it irked him that you talked back, had an attitude and used it to give him a piece of your mind. You had relished in the satisfaction of watching his mind reel in astonishment when you hadn’t done what he had asked, demanded of you. 

But it had seemed having a backbone had only made things worse for you, as he never backed off. Instead, he advanced more, finding interest in your irritation towards him. And so, as you sat at the party, you were left astonished again at him not seeking the opportunity to bother you while you sat in the home of his common room. Surely, he knew you were here. He annoyingly always had a way of finding you.

At the sound of his name being announced, your own following shortly after in pairing, your neck is strained in quickness, looking over your shoulder as your full attention grabbed. Brows furrowed, eyes scanning for the culprit’s voice, trying to understand what was happening. With narrowed eyes, your gaze falls to Enzo Berkshire, whose own brown orbs gleamed back at you with mischief at the situation about to unfold. 

The alcohol swirls fuzzing your brain partially while you recall what game they were playing, and how you had somehow ended up tangled up in it. Oh, fuck not seven minutes in heaven and with him, of all people, too. Your gaze shifts to the miscreant whose name had been dichotomized to yours, Mattheo fucking Riddle. 

He sat in a relaxed form, legs sprawled in a man spread that made your eyes twitch at the arrogance that reeked off of him. When did he even get here, or maybe you had been too busy in actually enjoying your night to not notice him. Sipping from his own cup, his head also snapped towards Berkshire at the combing of both your names together. His eyes now held a similar dissatisfaction of the pairings chosen, shooting Berkshire a mirroring glare, swallowing the last of his drink. 

Small nudges from your friends grab your focus, their encouragement for you to get up has you pondering whether the game had been rigged for your friends' own amusement. The idea of that being true pulls your face into a scrunch, shooting them an irritated glare before it lands back on Mattheo. His brows raise, chuckling at the clear hatred you're throwing at him, his lips curving into a menacing smirk, knowing your night is about to be ruined.

There was no way you were willing to trap yourself in an enclosed space with him, not even for seven minutes. That was like signing your death wish, throwing yourself into a starving lion's cage without a key. He already got to you enough just between the school halls, a constant fly that never shut up. Following you as he buzzed around, swarming your head with his daft insults and snide comments. It irked you how his group viewed Hufflepuff’s beneath them, as though they were people who could be easily taken advantage of. While some of your house did fall into that category, you hated being judged and grouped in with the rest. 

You turn your nose up, crossing your arms stubbornly, “I’m not doing that, no fucking way am I getting in a closet with him.” 

Mattheo chuckles, his eyes narrowing on you as his lips held a teasing smirk, “Not being a pussy now are you y/n.” His brows arch challenging, rising from his seat, he takes a step closer, the sounds of your friends complaining about you being a killjoy. “Thought little puffs like yourself had more manners than that? Or did getting left out in the cold of your badger burrow turn you bitter?” 

Rolling your eyes, you scoff at his comment, proud of yourself for not being too intoxicated to hold your tongue, not wanting to cause a scene and fuel your friends' entertainment more. Mattheo takes your silence as a win, deciding to add, “It’s only seven minutes. I promise I won’t bite.” His eyes tell a different story, gleaming with mischief. 

Shouts and hollers are rising, growing louder, trying to persuade you. A chorus of sentences are thrown at you;

“come on!”

“don’t be a wet blanket!”

“play the rules! We’re all mature here!”

Before fits of laughter erupt, making you roll your eyes and agree, wanting to get away from the growing harassment. 

Begrudgingly, you move following Mattheo, but not before pit-stopping past the booze table and taking a swig from the bottle of vodka. Desperately in urgent need of some liquor to calm the rising irritation within you, if you were to last seven minutes with him. Trapped in a room with your enemy was not something on your list for the night, and who knows how malicious this would turn out. 

Stepping in after Mattheo into the tightknit broom closet, you admire the elegance of it, far more above average than one along the Hogwarts halls. Though you were in the Slytherin common room, after all. The door closes, engulfing all the light as you shuffle inside, the rising heat spreading through your body allows you to recognise amongst the darkness the smallness of the room.

The brightening of the space forces you to notice how close you are to him, your eyes blinking, adjusting to the light, stepping back abruptly, putting more space between the two of you. You fold your arms leaning on the wall, but can’t help your eyes from looking over at him, his eyes already piercing into you. 

“Not scared, are you little puff?” His fingers twirl a spare cigarette leaning against the cabinet, his head lowering, roaming your body subtly. 

Scoffing, you stretch your legs out, accidentally bumping his own foot and you shift it awkwardly, making him chuckle. The buzz of the vodka shot is surging up within you now, as you realize that it probably wasn’t a good idea to have taken. 

“You always have had such a sharp witted tongue, and now that we’re alone you have nothing to say?” he chuckled. “Must be how devilishly handsome I am that- “

“Stop right there. You know what your problem is.” He glares at you with irritation as you interrupt him, but you're on a roll now. The alcohol pumping through your body is spilling out of your mouth, not allowing you to have a filter. You yap, and yarn away, words just vomiting out of your mouth at light speed. 

“And yeah you're attractive but so what, guys like you know that and it fucks with their head. It gets huge, and no one needs a huge head, like how would that be physically possible from like a physic standpoint, do you even know what physics is-.” 

Opening your mouth to continue your drunk ramble, you're silenced by the quickness Mattheo smashes his lips against yours, the rough warmth engulfing you instantly. There is a subtle hint of sweetness mixed among the heat, your lips finding solace in moving back with an eagerness you didn’t expect. The two of you get lost for a moment, eating away at each other, shaky gasps breathed out as he pulls back. 

A wave of dizziness floods your mind, the heat fogging it along with the alcohol, deep pools of darkness gaze back at you, his tongue swiping at his lip, his own chest heaving. Leaning back from him creates some much needed space, the extra air helping you to form words, “What just happened?” 

His curls separate, the tousled waves parting at the movement of his hand touching them. His gaze hardens in realization, “Doesn't matter, it doesn't change us." 

"Oh, sure, my tongue in your mouth does nothing for our relationship, got it." 

"Keep talking and you won't have that tongue." He’s quick to move intimidatingly, closing the gap between you two, his eyes seeming much stormier than before. 

You hold his gaze, "Oh wow, real mature Riddle, threatening me, such a Slytherin move.” He rolls his eyes, finding amusement in your dry rebuttals, while you continue speaking. “Threaten me all you want. I won’t be a pushover to someone like you. I won’t tolerate you trying to walk all over us hufflepuffs and take advantage. That’s only something pathetic shits like you would do.” 

“Watch your mouth,” his breath hits your chin, a cold threat while the fire swirls onwards in the depths of his mahogany orbs. All hints of amusement swept away. 

Rolling your tongue along the underside of your cheek, you retaliate. “Or what.” Tilting your head purposefully to provoke him. 

“I’ll fuck it.” 

The air is sliced, a spiked tension vibrating through it at his words. Exhaling a shallow breath, your eyes widening at his new threat, one that now holds a level of danger. 

The alcohol hums alive in your mind, an anger bubbling inside you threatening to latch itself onto the next thing, seeking a way to ease your tension. In a matter of minutes, Mattheo is helping you decide where to channel it, his lips finding their way back onto yours, this time with a hungry and desperate energy

You utter out a sudden moan rolling from the depths of your throat, as his tongue swipes at your soft lips demanding entrance. Instantaneously you grant it, your mouth parting, inviting him to take the kiss further. Your hands move on their own accord, running up his chest, taking Mattheo aback by your forwardness. His feet step backwards, your hands pressing harshly to shove him against the wall in order to gain more access. 

Your free hand moves imperceptibly downwards, feeling the grove of his hardening member, his head pulls back, breaking the kiss, eliciting a husky sucked in breath. His head falls against the walls, his tongue swiping his lips as more small breaths fall, his eyes watching your hand rub him softly. His own mind strugglings to consider what was happening, the alcohol swirling in his mind screaming at how good of an idea this is. 

His hands roam your body, feeling your delicate curves urging you to continue your pursuit. Your fingers fiddle with the complexity of the buckle, well to you, at least in your intoxicated state. His own hands brushing over yours to unbuckle his belt with eagerness, allowing your hands to reach for his zipper before you halt at the call of Blaise’s voice.

“Are you two still alive in there? Seven minutes are up!” Blaise’s voice booms out, a thudding bang on the door, triggering the removal of your hands, now abandoning all actions that once ceased fire. Not wanting to stick around, you’re bolting out the door, your body tingling with adrenaline, urging your abrupt exit. You're quick to maintain your composure though eager to escape, relaxing your face back to the mask you held, your fabricated hatred for Mattheo. 

He stands behind, hidden still in the cupboard's darkness, his hands fiddling to redo his belt up before Blaise can catch sight. “Fuck.. fuck.. fuck,” he’s muttering to himself frustratedly, his cheeks warming as reality crashes down onto him, not from being flustered but from the fire that burned deep underneath them, a bubble of anger.

Exiting with a tense jaw, it’s clear by Draco’s amused laughter that he wasn’t trying hard to hide his emotion. “You look like you could use a drink, Riddle.'' Draco, who had sauntered over to join Blaise in seeing the drama unfold, takes a sip of his own cup when Mattheo snatches it from him, downing the bitter liquid. “Not mine, you fucking twat.” Draco yells behind him as Mattheo storms throughout the party in search of you, discarding the empty cup. No way were you getting the last word or action or whatever. 

He just knew he had to get the upper hand back in your little spit. The crowd knows better to move aside when Mattheo's raging through a bull only seeing red. He stops and turns, scanning for the familiarity of your hair, his head snapping, eyes narrowing, an eagle seeking its prey. With his guided eye movements, he finally catches sight of your locks as you wander around, clearly unfamiliar with your territory, causing you to dip out of the party.

You were quick forcing Mattheo to walk around the halls at breakneck speed, his footsteps echoing sharply, slapping hard against the tiled floors. Eyes clouded with rancor, his view hazed by his frustration at you. Following you into the cold and stilled bathroom, he spots you bent over the sink, your gaze penetrating into your reflection, a girl who has no idea what the fuck she’s feeling. 

His gaze meets yours in the cheval glass, his reflection looming as he moves closer towards you with long strides, his presence charged with an erratic and unpredictable energy. The contact of his solid grip embeds into your wrist as he spins sharply, slamming you into the firmness of his chest.

“You think you can just pull that shit, and fuck off,” his voice is low and gravelly, holding a danger as if you were flame and he was ready to extinguish you. He moves swiftly, taking a hold of your jaw, angling your head to meet his eyes. With your face sealed in his grasp, his gaze shifts, watching the expression in your eyes, it glazing with a sense of desire, defiance and challenge pooling in your irises. “You better be able to finish what you started, little puff.” 

With his free hand he traces it down your body, finding amenity at the softness of your curves, digging his fingers into your sides, holding you in place against the basin. Your face contorts at his words, your mind attempting to protest what he’s implying. Yet it’s not just the alcohol tainting your control, but a carnal power that holds his gaze, awaiting his move. He’s quick to lean in, recognizing the invitation in your stare, capturing your lips in a kiss. It’s fiery and heated, burning with the taste of sweet liquor and cigarettes mixing on your tongues. 

His hand slides, gripping your face with a more delicate touch, the tips of his fingers threading into your hair. A burning passion explodes within you, your lips matching his hungrily, eager hands pulling, grabbing onto his neck to bring him closer. A needy, insistent moan escapes you, the feeling of the heated kiss igniting your core, sending waves of pleasure straight to it. 

The two of your hands move rapidly, desperately roaming each other's bodies. Shaky groans fill the air, though are quick to be silenced by himself as he presses sweet sloppy kisses up along your neck, pulling on your hair to allow him more access. Nipping at the skin, he relishes in the moans you let out, a sound he thought he’d never hear. 

Your skirt bunches in his hold as he spins you around, pressing his hardening cock against your behind, digging your hip bones roughly into the basin. Whimpering your lips fall apart, met with low rough groans breathed in your ear. The heat of his breath sends goosebumps along your skin, your head falling onto his shoulder mercilessly. 

His eyes lift to watch you in the mirror, his hands sliding under your skirt to grope your ass, as his voice strums your ear, “not so fucking bold are you now, look at you already, a pathetic mess.” Squeezing the supple flesh of your cheeks, he swipes a hand lowering down, his fingers running up your cunt coaxing them in your slickness. A low groan rumbles, vibrating through him onto you, “fuck..you really love this don’t you, your soakin princess.” 

You’re urged forwards bending over the basin, hands falling to grip the sides, your face a mere meter from the mirror. Your line of sight is in perfect view of him and the way he bites his lower lip, flipping your skirt fully up. His eyes take in the full of your ass, hands caressing and squeezing the skin before his fingers tug your panties down. His thick cock is released from his pants restrictions, your irises blow fuller with lust, watching with luxury how his brows scrunch while he pumps it. 

His eyes meet yours again, your lips quivering in anticipation as he teases your folds. “That’s it, keep your eyes on me. Be good for me, I’ve had enough of your fucking attitude for a night, now im going to fuck it out of you.” Your breath is caught in your throat as he inches his way in, the stretch burns and your mouth parts shaky breaths falling, followed by a loud grunt from Mattheo. 

The more he pushes in, the more your mind starts to split open, your eyes struggling to remain wide and trained on him. He watched as they flutter slightly, his hand reaching to coil around your hair, pulling it back, the jerk making you fully focus on him. “That’s it almost there,” he grunts out, his hips pushing, sliding more of him in till you take him all. 

He pauses momentarily, not wanting to actually hurt you, but not really giving too many shits, before his hips snap carnally pressing deeper inside your soaking cunt. “Merlin.. fuck me..” hands tightening on your skin, pinching at your sides, “god you’re so fucking tight.” His voice is low, husky, and broken as he struggles to contain himself. 

Your hands fall pressing on the mirror, moans falling rapidly out of your mouth mixed with your breathy whimpers. Hot breath hits the glass, the condensation surrounding your handprints. The tension is breaking between you two with each deep thrust he does, your chest tightening and stomach warming with pressure. The feeling is so good you're unable to form any words, your eyes burning with pleasure as you watch him through the mirror.  

He was a sight for sore eyes, his brown eyes displaying a darkened shade, curls bouncing as his hips thrust vigorously, his speed relentless. His head tilts back as he focuses on the sweet feeling of your warm pussy clenching around him, enticing another low groan. “Fuck me.” 

He chuckles, his eyes refocusing on your contorted face, taking deep enjoyment at seeing you fall apart on his cock. “Look at you, little puff, not so fucking innocent,” his hips snap, his hand tugging on your hair, making your back arch, his other hand wrapping around your stomach to press against it. “So fucking good, taking my cock so fucking deep, can’t even talk, can you.” 

He grins, his eyes lowering to watch your pussy swallow his cock, sliding in and out as he bottoms you out. The arch of your back allows the tip of his cock to rub against your g spot, the head hammering against it over and over, your moans growing louder.

Mattheo can’t have the two of you being caught as he covers your mouth, pulling you back up against his chest. “Shhh, you’re enjoying this so much aren’t you, how does it feel to have someone you hate buried so deep inside this delicious pussy.”

“That’s it, squeeze down on my cock, want you to cum on it.” His hand drops from your stomach, rubbing your clit in fast circles, making your eyes roll back. Your hand grip his forearm as your release builds, hitting you hard like a tidal wave.

A series of incoherent words fall from your lips in lustful moans straight into the muffling of Mattheo’s hand, as the sensations rush through you at full speed. His fingers lack any remorse at slowing their pace as he continues to roughly pound into you, his own climax nearing. 

A low groan comes from him praising you, “That’s a good girl,” his hips rapidly move before he pushes you, bending you once more over the basin, gripping your hips tightly as he cums inside you, a low rumble falling from his lips. “fucking god” His movements still, his cock twitching, savouring the feel of your sweet mold engulfing him. The hollow bathroom comes to a silence other than the heavy breathing from you both, condensation covering the mirror. 

He thrusts once more inside, his hands resting on your back, before he pulls out, watching the cum drip out of you slowly. A satisfied grin spreads on his face as he slides your undies back up your legs, swiping his fingers, he gathers some of his seed up. Your legs twitch from the sensation, raising your head to look at him again through the mirror, your head now turning to stare over your shoulder. 

With a hand on your shoulder you’re spun back around, “Open up sweetcheeks,” in your worn out state you obey, sticking your tongue out for him to slide his fingers in your mouth. “Let's taint that tongue with something better, and rid the bad taste you can't seem to dispose of.” The saltiness of his cum stings your taste buds as you lick around his fingers, your chest rising and falling at the intense moment. 

He retracts them back, his eyes gazing over your flushed face and wide eyes, grinning as he bites his lower lip. “So, little badger, got anything left to say?” He’s finding it amusing how you're still a little out of it to give him any sort of witty comment, his hand moves to fix your skirt, letting them rest on the tops of your thighs. 

He knows your attitude probably won’t change, if anything, he’d expect it to get worse. But he doesn’t seem to mind if it leads to a moment again for the two of you to fuck out your frustrations. Though he doesn’t let you know that, adding, “This still changes nothing.” He throws you a wink before he exits the bathroom, leaving you alone with your now racing thoughts and a losing aftertaste. Now you have another reason to hate him, to hate how good he was.

Tagging: @helendeath, @dr4g0ngirl

Masterlist

[macfrog]

ride it, cowgirl cowboy like me chapter ten

hey dudes. anyone up for some dbf? i seriously can't thank you guys enough for all the love y'all show this series. blows my mind every time. i have been super excited for this chapter for a WHILE. might be my fave so far. who knows. you can grab chapters 1-9 on my masterlist and also my ao3 if ur feeling fancy. love u all sm!!!!!! ✨💘💫

pairing: dbf!joel x fem!reader

summary: joel picks you up from a girls’ night. you’ve plans for when you get home

warnings: 18+ (minors dni!!!) reader isn't an astrology girlie (sorry), more pining beCAUSE, alcohol consumption + a mention of the devil’s lettuce, very quick bit of unwanted touching, even quicker bit of protective joel, soft!joel, softdom!joel, one tiny mention of daddy, protected piv sex this time (feeling conservative slutty max will return), reader rides him into the sunset, age gap (reader is 23, joel is 48), cursing

word count: 6.7k

series masterlist | main masterlist | playlist

You lazily drag yourself over and over Joel’s dick, each stroke drawing you nearer and nearer to your high. When your body starts to falter, you feel him shift, and open your eyes to see him leaning over to the nightstand. His fingers grip the rim of the black cowgirl hat you’d worn that night. He lies back, flat against the mattress, and reaches up, placing the hat on top of your head. You smile. Joel speaks in a low, gentle, but commanding whisper. “There you go, cowgirl. Show me how it’s done.”

You never believed much in the power of the universe. Astrology, moons, manifestation. Whatever. None of it ever really meant much to you. You knew your star sign, knew which cool little symbol resembled you, and that was about it. Everything past that was…confusing and, frankly, a little overwhelming.

However.

If the universe were to send you a sign, one huge, fluorescent, multi-colored, in-your-face sign, that it was on your side…this weekend might just be it.

Your dad’s downstairs, finishing up packing for his work trip. His departure is imminent. Sarah’s been in Nashville since last night. A series of texts she sent you at 3AM riddled with spelling errors and heart emojis tell you she’s been having a pretty good time so far.

You are Joel are…alone. All by yourselves. For a whole…twenty hours.

Can’t have it all, I guess.

Your eyes skim down the texts you sent him this morning, texts he is yet to reply to.

You: Merry Christmas!!!

You took his non-reply for confusion – he is almost fifty, maybe he doesn’t get the joke? It’s a pretty lame joke, anyways. Very lame. If your thumb hovers over the send button before you press it, it’s probably not that great a joke. And your thumb had most definitely hovered. So, you’d followed it up.

You: As in, today’s the day

You: I don’t mean it’s actually Christmas

You: I mean like, happy ‘we’re finally gonna be alone again’ day

You: Never mind

“Hello?” Anna’s voice cuts through your train of thought. “Are you even listening to me?”

You drop your phone, shaking your head clear of Joel. “Yep. Sorry. Just didn’t catch that last part. You froze.”

The image of her on your – pretty fucking dusty – laptop screen rolls its eyes, knowing you’re lying. “I don’t know whether to go with the pink or the black boots,” she says.

“Ain’t your dress yellow?”

Her head falls into her hands. She throws herself down onto her bed and slides her laptop closer. “That was, like, ten minutes ago. I’m goin’ with the pink strappy one now.”

“Pink does say rodeo.”

“Fuck you,” she snaps through a giggle. “Remind me what you’re wearin’, again.”

“Black hat, black boots, black dress.”

“You’re so boring.”

“Thanks. Really looking forward to our night out.”

Anna snorts and then stands back up, strides over to her closet and resumes rummaging. “Black jacket, too?” she calls over her shoulder.

“Uhuh,” you reply, glancing back down to your phone. “Although – it has rhinestones. And tassels. Not so boring after all, huh?”

Anna’s silence drags your eyes from the text thread back to your laptop screen. She’s frozen in place, twisted around with a dress in her hands, jaw on the floor. “Show it to me. Now.”

“Hold on,” you roll over and off your bed, your shoulder stiff from the position you’d been lying in, “I think I left it downstairs.”

“Tell your dad I say hey!”

You pad down the carpeted stairs in your socks, toward the sunlit hallway.

“Dad, have you seen my– Oh, fuck.”

As you round the corner at the bottom of the stairs, glancing over your left shoulder to the front door, your chest knocks into something hard. Steady. Strong.

Something you recognize the feel of before you’ve given him a proper look.

“Mind your step, baby,” Joel says, and your heart leaps.

“What the fuck are you doin’ here?” you whisper, peering around his body to look for your dad.

“He’s out front,” Joel tells you, then takes your shoulder and reels you in against his chest. “’m just here to help ‘im with his GPS.”

He plants a kiss on the top of your head and gives you a squeeze. Your head rests safely on his chest, arms link at his back. If you didn’t have plans tonight, and if your dad wasn’t, like, ten feet from you guys right now, you’d never let him go. Just follow him around, vice grip around his waist, surrounded by the smell and feel of him.

Not that that means anything. You’d do other stuff, too. You’re not…you know.

Your dad’s voice streams in through the open door and Joel releases you.

“It ain’t for workin’, Joel, I’m about to throw it at the f– Hey, kiddo.”

“Hey. What’s the matter with your GPS?”

You lean in to the tiny device in his hands. Joel’s elbow comes up to rest on your shoulder.

“Just won’t connect to the car. Every time I plug it in, it just…” He lifts his hands, screen loose in his fingers, and hands you a bewildered look.

You look at him, expressionless. “Why don’t you just use your phone?”

“Because I paid almost a hundred bucks for this thing, and I’ll be damned if I’m– Alright,” he stops himself, eyes shutting in exasperation, “I already explained this to him. I ain’t justifyin’ myself to the two of you.”

Joel’s laughing behind his hand, pretending to scratch his nose when your dad stalks off to the kitchen and throws the device down, snatching the instructions off the table.

The pair of you follow, both still trying to swallow your laughter. Joel wanders around the table and sits down beside your dad, fumbling with the screen. You dive into the coat closet at the bottom of the stairs and fish out your bejeweled, tasseled jacket.

“You lookin’ forward to your girls’ night?” Joel asks, eyes flitting up and down the leather jacket in your hands.

“Mhm,” you reply, opening your mouth to continue when your dad butts in.

“S’posed to be a girls’ night, but that boy Sam’s crashin’ it, ain’t he?”

“Well, we asked him.” You shrug. “It’s his night off.”

Your dad scoffs, shaking his head to Joel, who looks up to you with a confused expression. “’s the big deal with that?”

“Oh, wise up, Miller. He’s only goin’ ‘cause of…” He wags a finger in your direction, and a smirk peels across Joel’s lips.

“Is he, now?”

“Uhuh,” your dad replies, intense stare still on the instructions in front of him. “Makes no damn sense. I plugged it in using the cable they gave me in the box. Stupid thing…”

You shake your head to Joel, who’s still looking at you, bemused. He knows you and Sam are just friends. Also knows your dad is the most oblivious theorist to walk the planet. Just aiming his gun at the wrong target, is all.

“I’m gonna let you two get back to…that,” you say, turning to head back upstairs. “Anna says hi, by the way.”

Your dad’s eyebrows rise once, his eyes never lifting from his GPS. “Hi, Anna.”

“Hey, Anna,” Joel echoes, smirk on his lips.

“Not to you,” you throw back, hopping up the first step. You hear his chuckle as you disappear.

----------

Anna’s reaction to your jacket in person matches that over Facetime: a deafening squeal. A squeal which she repeats almost every damn time she sees you throughout the night.

“So – fucking – cute!” she exclaims for the fifth time, fingers dancing through the tassels. “And it goes so well with your hat.”

You sip on your cocktail, nodding enthusiastically, pushing your eyebrows up underneath the brim of the black cowgirl hat on your head. Trying to match her energy. Your mind’s elsewhere.

Joel texted you a few hours ago. Told you to have a good night, said something about Sam, but you were stood right next to the dude, so you quickly locked your phone and slipped it back into your clutch.

Now, standing with your back against the wall of Franks, watching Sam play pool with Eve, you feel safe enough to read over the message.

Joel: Have fun baby. Be safe. Tell Sam good luck from me.

You squint at the screen, pulling it away from your face and leaning back in to read it over. Good luck? The fuck does he mean –

You: Good luck??

He replies almost instantly.

Joel: Yeah. Good luck winning you over. Took me, what, a week?

Oh, fuck off. You roll your eyes and throw your phone facedown onto the table where Anna and Kara sit, about twenty minutes deep into a conversation you missed the beginning of.

Your attention turns to the room before you – brick-walled, metal dome lightshades hanging over each pool table. Glass-paneled door to your left leading back through to the main bar. For being a tiny bar on a backstreet, Frank’s is pretty lively. There are bodies everywhere, bumping by each other, drunken arms slung over shoulders, hips swaying with the soft rock song blasting from out front.

You imagine your dad here with Joel, maybe Hank and Bill, too. Playing pool, beer bottles resting on the felt while they take their shot. Or sat on the rooftop, sipping on a whiskey. Talking about you and Sarah. What does Joel say about you when you’re not around?

And what does he want to say, but can’t, ‘cause it’s your dad? What does he think, and bite back when it bubbles to the surface?

Your straw gargles, slurping up the last few sips of your drink. You lean over to Anna and Kara, holding your empty glass up.

“Another?”

They both shake their heads, and you nod, turning on your own back to the bar.

You squeeze between two older women, both dressed smart and sharp. One of them – clutching a Manhattan – shifts out of the way as you pass.

“…one more conversation with him about squash,” she tells her companion, “and I am gonna blow my brains out…”

You edge over to the bar and slot into a free space, propping your elbows up on the wood. One of Sam’s coworkers – her name escapes you – notices you and shuffles over, smiling sweetly.

“How you doin’?” she asks, running a damp cloth inside a tumbler.

“Good,” you reply. “Could I just get a Bud, please?”

“Sure thing,” she says, and reaches behind to grab one. You slide her a note and she hands you change, and then you’re on your way back to the pool room.

As you slink by the two women, a weight knocks into your shoulder, almost sending your beer flying out of your hand.

“Sorry,” a rough voice sputters on your left, and you glance in its direction. Some broad dude in a tight t-shirt.

“’s fine,” you mumble, clutching your hat; a smell of weed choking your throat.

He passes by behind you, one hand lingering a little too long on your waist, and you saunter back over to Anna and Kara.

“That dude stinks, right?” Anna whispers behind a cupped hand, and you snort.

“He smells like he’s having a good night.”

“We’re talking about Romeo and Juliet over there. We’re basically third, fourth, and fifth wheeling,” Kara says, nodding over to Sam and Eve, who’re finished their game of pool and have now graduated to darts.

“I don’t…think that’s a thing.”

“Eve asked me if Sam was single earlier,” Anna says, lifting her straw to her red lips.

“What?” Kara spits out, choking on her drink. “Eve has a boyfriend!”

Anna giggles. “He’s kinda an ass, anyway. Look at them, they’re so sweet.”

“You say sweet, I hear morally wrong.”

“Who says it’s morally wrong?” you chirp, alcohol pushing the words over your lips before your brain’s had time to stop them. Your fingers clutch your phone, still laying on the table where you left it. “You?”

“Uh, it’s cheating, dude. What if Nick found out?”

“’s not that big a deal,” you reply, phone screen lighting your face in a blue hue, “they’re just having fun.”

Anna points to you, lifting her glass. “Here’s to havin’ fun, I guess.”

Kara lifts her own reluctantly and they clink, but you’re distracted. Already typing a message to Joel. Bored. Drunk. Morally wrong.

You: What you doing?

Joel: Watching TV. What you doing?

You: What ya watvhin ?

Joel: None of your business. Go get another drink. Looks like you’re not drunk enough.

You lift your head with a giggle, almost ready to turn your phone around to Anna and Kara and say, look what the dude I’m sleeping with just text me. And then, thankfully, your good sense kicks in and you bring the screen closer to your chest.

You: Kinda bored. Wanna come home now please

Bored, horny. It all means the same.

Joel says he’ll be at Frank’s in twenty minutes. You rest your chin on your palm and watch as Sam cheers Eve for hitting bullseye.

“I think they’re cute,” you whisper.

Anna and Kara are already preoccupied, taking photos of one another across the table. Kara leans into you and you smile, flash blinding your hazy eyes for a few minutes afterward. A few more pictures, couple boomerangs of your glasses cheersing, and then your phone’s vibrating.

Joel: Outside. No rush.

That last part is where he’s wrong. There most definitely is a rush, and it’s in the form of the heat that starts to pool between your legs.

“Alright,” you shimmy off your barstool and stretch your back. “My ride’s here.”

“What?” Anna almost screams, her hand slapping down on the table. “You’re leavin’?”

You nod. “Sorry, babe.”

“Don’t babe me, traitor. It’s, like, midnight.”

“Uh, it’s, like, almost 2AM. I’m tired. I don’t know how y’all do it.”

She sighs, conceding, and agrees to walk with you to the front door. Kara and Eve stop off by the bar to grab another drink. Sam holds the door open for you and Anna and you’re hit by a wave of cold night air, instantly cooling your hot, sweaty skin.

“Is that…Mr. Miller?” Anna asks, mouth falling wide open.

You glance down the street and notice his black truck, parked up by the curb. “Mhm,” you reply, “my dad’s out of town, so he’s picking me up.”

“Can he take me home, too?”

Sam snickers. “Wow, Anna. That’s just…Wow.”

She shrugs, lips closing around her straw as she stares at Joel’s truck. Something inside you lurches at the idea of Joel sitting there, his eyes glued on you, watching everything you do, everyone around you. And then again at the thought of Anna and her doting gaze on him.

“Alright, I guess that’s my cue to skip.”

Anna pouts. “One more drink?”

“I’m good, thanks,” you scoff, patting her head affectionately. I got business to attend to.

You give her a quick kiss on the cheek and Sam wraps an arm around your shoulder, giving it a squeeze before you’re wandering off toward Joel’s truck.

“Hey.” Something – someone – hooks around your elbow, and you turn back. It’s that same guy who stank of weed.

“Hi,” you reply, as sweet as you can, but trying to loosen his grip.

“Saw you inside, you out with friends?”

“Mhm. I’m just leavin’, my–”

“Few of us are headed upstairs. You wanna come?”

You glare at him a few seconds, before yanking your arm from his grasp. “Nah, no thanks. I’m leaving. Have a good night.”

You stagger off, feeling his eyes on you as you go. Joel’s truck headlights switch on, dazzling your eyes, and you quickly click around to the passenger side, throwing yourself in beside him.

Joel doesn’t say hey, doesn’t squeeze your thigh, doesn’t even look at you when you settle into the seat. Just asks –

“Who’s that kid?”

“Uh…not sure. Bumped into ‘im in the bar.”

“He give you trouble?”

“No,” you lean over the console, pulling your seatbelt over your body, and flash him a tipsy grin, “thought that was my job. Givin’ trouble.”

Joel doesn’t reply. Doesn’t take his scowl off the dude outside Frank’s, either. Your eyes meander across to his hand, locked in a tight fist around the wheel. Your smile drops.

“Joel. It’s fine. Can we go?”

When you lift a hand to the crook of his elbow and he feels your warmth on his skin, he tears his gaze away and it lands on you. Soft, gentle. His lip isn’t curled anymore. His brows lift.

His eyes watch your lips as you whisper the words to him.

“Want you to take me home.”

“’s go, pretty girl.”

----------

Joel refuses, no matter how many times you ask, how hard you bat your eyelashes, how many promises you make, to stop by a drive thru.

“Please?” you ask one last time before he’s pulling in to his neighborhood.

He shakes his head. “Look at that, we’re already home.”

“I ain’t takin’ no for an answer, Miller, not until the engine’s off. We’re still driving.”

He doesn’t reply. Just pulls up in his drive, cuts the engine, and looks at you. Shrugs. “Oops.”

“Fuck you,” you groan, sliding down in your seat. “I’m starvin’.”

“Make you a big breakfast in the mornin’, how’s that sound?”

“Wanted a Big Mac, but whatever.”

Your fingers fumble for the door handle, clicking it open. You roll out of the truck and stroll around to meet Joel at the driver’s side. He snakes an arm around your shoulders, steadying you as you walk up his porch steps and into the house.

“I’m fine,” you murmur, glancing around his living room.

“Alright,” he says, tossing his keys and kicking his boots off.

Your eyes settle on the TV screen, paused. Probably around the time you text him. There’s a crowded hospital room onscreen, doctors in dark blue scrubs, all surrounding someone lying on a bed, someone who looks pretty familiar…

“Is that…fuckin’…Grey’s Anatomy…?”

Joel chuckles, peeling your jacket from your shoulders.

“That’s Meredith! When she–”

“She fell in the damn river,” Joel mutters, placing the tasseled leather over the back of his couch. “Derek had to go in after her. Intense stuff.”

“Right? I told you it was good!” You smack his arm. “I can’t believe you’re watchin’ it without me.”

“I ain’t watchin’ it,” he protests, “it was just on, ‘n I needed something to keep me awake. I’m still rooting for Meredith ‘n George.”

“We can watch it from the beginning.”

“Yeah?”

You nod, moving over to him. “And then I can be over here all the time, and you can make me all the grilled cheese I want, and we can lie in bed and…do stuff.” Your chin rests on his chest, flashing him a toothy grin. Hands swinging in his at your side.

Joel’s eyes narrow, but there’s a smirk on his lips. “You’re drunk.”

“I’m not drunk. I had a couple drinks. I’m not drunk.”

“H’many fingers am I holdin’ up?” Joel asks, raising his fist. You punch it away.

“Ha-ha,” you say tonelessly, and wander away from him.

“Baby,” he calls you from behind. Sure, you’re tipsy, and he can be a cocky asshole – especially when he has to take care of you, but that’s a sound you’ll never get tired of hearing. Baby. You’re his darlin’, his sweet girl.

You spin around, very nearly losing your footing, and he’s standing with an arm out, ready for you to take.

You smile dumbly. Meander over, and take his strong hand in both of yours, wrapping your fingers around two of his to let him reel you in against his body.

“C’mon,” he whispers, as you lean against his frame. “Let’s get you upstairs.”

You follow him up, knowing where he’s leading you. You’ve spent more time in there the last few weeks than you have your entire life.

His room is cool, not cold, but comfortable. It’s Joel all over; the muted colors, the décor, the smell that calms you as soon as you stumble over the threshold.

He sits you down on the edge of his bed and kneels, pulling your boots off one by one.

You giggle.

“You laughin’ at me?”

“You’re like my own personal tr…No, not trainer. Wait. Personal ch–”

“Chef?” he says, snorting. “Not chef. Try again, soberhead.”

“Oh, I dunno.” You throw your arms up as he sits your boots against the wall, then stands and takes your hat off.

“This,” he says, placing it on the nightstand at your side of the bed, “is very cute. I like it.”

“I’m cute, too, y’know,” you whisper, pouting.

He smiles, and leans down to give you a quick kiss on the lips, pointer finger under your chin.

“The cutest.”

“Ha!” you roar. Joel twists around you to undo the zipper at the back of your dress. “Joel Miller thinks I’m the cutest. Take that, Anna…”

He laughs. When he unzips you, he pulls the dress off your bare chest and down your legs. You don’t shy away, used to the idea now of him seeing you naked. Used to the idea of him seeing you in any vulnerable state; drunk, or naked, or in a sobbing mess on day two of your period.

You notice, even though you’re a tad dizzy with what alcohol is left in your system, that his eyes linger on your panties a moment before he turns and grabs a tee from a chair.

And something inside you ticks.

“Joel?”

He’s pulling the shirt over your head. It smells like him. Intoxicates you much more and much quicker than any drink you could order from Frank’s.

“Mhm?”

You feed both arms through the sleeves, swallowing the question you were about to ask. He’s standing up now, telling you to get into bed.

He walks over to his dresser and begins removing his own clothing. He only sleeps in boxershorts. Your eyes track him as he yanks his t-shirt up over his toned shoulders; fingers undo his belt, unzip his jeans. Everything is discarded to the side for now; he has something more pressing to attend to.

His best friend’s daughter, laying in his bed, a pool of wet forming in her panties.

He just doesn’t know it yet.

As he slips under the covers beside you, you pull off your underwear in one quick movement. Joel doesn’t seem to notice, or so you think; his arms immediately take hold of your waist and pull you against his body. You’ve gotten into the habit of sleeping pressed against his torso, his thigh between your legs. Joel settles comfortably with you draped over him, and lets out a deep sigh.

“Joel?” you whisper again into the darkness, growing braver.

“Hm?” he replies, starting to fall asleep.

You toss ideas over in your head. None of them good, you’re sure, but you’re getting desperate. How he can’t feel your damp core on his thigh, you’ve no idea.

But then, maybe he can? Joel doesn’t miss anything, especially not where you and your…arrangement are concerned. Can he feel you? Is he deliberately ignoring it?

Maybe he has something up his own sleeve?

“I…was just wondering…”

“Wondering what, darlin’?” His voice is muffled, spoken through unmoving lips. You glance up at his face. His eyes are closed.

You grow more desperate.

“…wondering what your body count is?”

You ask it as innocently as you can, your voice wavering on the words body count. It gets him, though, as his eyes blink open a few seconds after you say it.

“I ain’t tellin’ you that. Go to sleep.” He closes them again.

“I wanna know.”

He ignores you.

“Joel,” you moan.

He calls you by name now, and you’re not sure if you’re pissing him off or turning him on – or both.

“Go. To. Sleep.”

“I’m not tired, though. Not yet.”

In response, Joel lets go of his hold on you and rolls over without another word. It’d sting if you weren’t soaking wet right now, and didn’t have a strong hunch he was hardening under the sheets.

“Joooel…” you whine, sitting up on your elbow. No use.

You take hold of his shoulder and tug him back toward you, rolling him onto his back. Like a deadweight, he remains frozen.

“Ugh,” you groan, and drag yourself on top of him, knees either side of his waist, ass hovering. When you sit back onto him, your core lining up with his crotch, your suspicions are proven right.

He’s hard.

Not as hard as he can get, as you’d like him to be, as you’ve felt him before…but he’s hard.

“Joel…” you mewl into the darkness, starting to grind your bare center over his boxers. The friction feels good, so you apply more pressure.

“If you don’t stop that,” Joel’s voice finally grumbles, “I’ll be sleepin’ downstairs.”

“Sex in the living room sounds good to me.”

His eyes open. “We,” one hand comes up to point between the both of you, as if he doesn’t expect your sobering self to understand which pairing he means, “are not having sex. No sex tonight.”

You sigh, shoulders dropping dramatically.

“Huff all you want, baby, it is not happening.”

“Why?”

“Why? Because you’re a few drinks too deep and it’s three in the morning. I’m tired, it’s been a long night waitin’ for you, I–”

“So let me make it up to you. I ain’t even drunk anymore.”

“No?”

“Nuh-uh. Could count any number a’ fingers you put in front of me.”

“Funny.” He closes his eyes.

“Joel.” You drag your hips again. If anything, he’s harder than he was when you first sat down on him. “I had a few drinks, I’ve sobered up. C’mon…”

You bend your waist and lower yourself to align your lips with the side of his head, peppering the skin under his ear with soft kisses.

“I wanna ride you, daddy.”

This gets him. His eyes open again, staring up at the ceiling. His hands slowly come up to rest on your hips.

“Don’t– That’s low, even for you, kid.”

You giggle and straighten up. When your hands lightly trace down his chest, onto his midriff and follow the trail of hair to his boxers, he doesn’t stop you. Just watches from beneath hooded lids, tensing at each point your fingers touch.

You raise your eyebrows, watching his expression for any sign to stop, and it never comes. He remains in place when your fingertips hook around the waistband of his underwear, slowly pulling down.

Joel breathes in deep when you reveal the tip of his cock, springing up to rest on his lower stomach. You feel your core clench. If he’s not inside you in the next five minutes, you might scream.

Well, you’ll be screaming either way.

You look back into his eyes and tilt your jaw, asking for permission.

“Go on,” he whispers.

Your hands take him eagerly, pumping up and down his shaft, and his head falls back onto the pillow with pleasure.

“Uhuh,” you mumble, focusing on his solid dick, but desperate for more. You give him a gentle squeeze and a groan passes his lips, his grip tightening on your body.

You let go of him and grind your hips along his length, folds coating his shaft in your wetness. Joel’s humming, watching as you pull yourself up and down him.

Then, you lean forward, and your hands take hold of him again. You give him a couple more strokes, eliciting a deep groan, and then line his bare cock up at your entrance, practically foaming at the mouth to sink down on him already.

“Woah, woah,” Joel takes hold of your wrist, “slow down, cowgirl. I gotta get a condom.”

You huff as he leans over to his nightstand and opens the drawer. “Don’t want one, Joel, I’m on the pill.”

“No way, baby,” he says through a chuckle, silver wrapper in his fingers. “We already did that, one too many times.”

“So just pull out?”

“Nope.”

You sigh, frustrated.

Joel holds the packet out to you, smirk on his face like he doesn’t expect you to take it.

So, you do.

You steal it from him and tear the wrapper, fishing the rubber out between your two fingers. Pinching the top, you roll it down his shaft and pump up and down for good measure.

“Ready?” you ask, head tilted, cocky smile on your lips.

“Wait, wait,” he whispers, shoulders lifting off the mattress. He lifts the hem of your shirt, telling you, “Off,” before pulling it over your head, exposing your bare breasts.

He stares you down; legs wide open, straddling him, completely naked, nipples hardened, figure silhouetted against the slivers of light peeking through the shades from the streetlights outside. You’ve never felt so confident, mounted on top of Joel fucking Miller.

His eyes roll back and his head falls against the pillow. “Fuckin’ – knock yourself out, baby.”

You steady yourself with one hand on his chest, the other taking hold of his cock and guiding it to your entrance. You push his head through your folds a couple times, and Joel hisses at the feeling, before you sink down.

You stop after the tip the first time, but it draws the same reaction from you both. Joel groans even louder than before, and you moan as you push yourself back up.

Then, without warning, you sink the whole way down.

He’s so deep it brings tears to your eyes, so big that he’s stretching you out more than you thought possible, hitting all the right spots already before you’ve even begun.

Joel’s eyes are screwed shut, his grip on your hips digging into your skin so tight it almost hurts. His jaw is tight, holding back what you can only imagine are the neediest moans he could sound.

So, you decide to draw them from him.

You lean forward and begin bouncing, feeling his thickness pull out and push back into you, both hands on Joel’s chest now for balance. You’re whimpering, the burn of his cock stretching your tight cunt so good and borderline painful at the same time, but you don’t stop.

“Good girl, good fuckin’ girl,” Joel moans, opening his eyes to watch you ride his dick. “’attagirl, just like that.”

“Joel…” you cry, letting him bottom out each time, feeling his balls slam into your ass with each bounce.

“Yeah? You like that? Tell me, baby, use your words.”

“So – good – Joel – oh!” you shout.

“Such a good fuckin’ girl for me, huh?”

You fight against the urge to close your eyes; the pleasure between your legs and the knot beginning to tighten in your stomach are all you can see, hear, feel, but you want to watch him some more. You want to see what you do to him.

You lean forward even further, moving your hands to the pillow either side of his head, so you’re directly above him now. One of Joel’s hands comes to the back of your head, pulling you down until your foreheads are together, moans escaping your mouths only to be inhaled by the other.

Joel speaks to you quieter, through gritted teeth.

“Like ridin’ me, do ya? Like the way it feels?”

“Mhm,” you moan back, and he brings a hand down to slap your ass. You yelp. “Fuck…”

“You look so good, baby, so good. Such a fuckin’ whore for me, hm?”

Another stinging spank pulls a whine from you so filthy, so loud that you’re sure the neighbors will hear, even at this hour. Joel smirks back, resting his hand back on your hip, where he has a grip of you.

Then, he bucks his own hips, pushing into you deeper than before, so deep you see stars. Your mouth falls open in a silent moan, panting through the searing pain so good that you never want it to end.

“Joel – I’m gonna – fuck, I’m gonna cum!”

“That’s it, sweet girl, cum all over me. Let go, baby, I’m here.”

That does it. The coil snaps, your walls clench. Joel lets out a guttural moan as you throw your head back and ride him through your orgasm. He coos you through it, squeezing your hips, whispering, That’s my girl, doin’ so good, baby as your body rocks back and forth on his cock.

When you come back down to earth, your lids heavy and breathing staggered, you swear your body can’t take anymore. You feel so fucked out that you’re not sure you can sit up straight on top of Joel.

But he’s always been able to read your mind, and this is no different. He pulls himself up and into you, propped up with one strong hand on the mattress behind his back, the other wrapping around your waist. His cock is still buried deep inside you.

“Joel…” you whimper pathetically. “Can’t do it anymore…”

“That’s okay, baby, we’re gonna do this one together, alright? I got you. Can you do that for me? Just one more?”

You link your arms around his neck and lean into him; his strong form doesn’t shift, just takes on your weight and keeps the both of you upright as he starts to bounce you on his length again.

You’re overstimulated; your cunt swollen, fucked-out, drenched in cum, but Joel makes you feel so good that it’s impossible to let him stop. Your arms pull him in closer to your chest to steady yourself, and his groans echo in your ear.

“Good girl, that’s– that’s it, so fuckin’ tight for me, pretty girl.”

When it all becomes too much to take – Joel’s hand squeezing your waist, your clit rutting against the bottom of his stomach, his fucking cock buried so deep inside you that you swear you can feel him splitting you open – you push him back down onto the bed.

Once when you still lived in New York you read something in a Cosmo about spelling the word ‘coconut’ with your hips when riding a guy. You’d tried it a couple times with hookups, and it’d never done anything for you. They’d never done anything for you.

But here you are, nearing your second orgasm, on top of someone making such a mess of you that you brain can hardly compute to spell coconut, never mind your hips being able to round the shape of the word.

You lazily drag yourself over and over Joel’s dick, each stroke drawing you nearer and nearer to your high. When your body starts to falter, you feel him shift, and open your eyes to see him leaning over to the nightstand.

His fingers grip the rim of the black cowgirl hat you’d worn that night. He lies back, flat against the mattress, and reaches up, placing the hat on top of your head. You smile. Joel speaks in a low, gentle, but commanding whisper.

“There you go, cowgirl. Show me how it’s done.”

It’s all you need. It’s all it takes, by this point.

You brace yourself against his chest again, positioning yourself just right, and bounce on him until your vision starts to blur.

The noises slipping out of Joel’s mouth each time your bodies connect at the base of his cock push you closer and closer; every groan and whimper which passes his lips makes you sink your hips down even harder, pushing him deeper and deeper with every bounce.

“So – fuckin’ – big – inside me,” you slur, and Joel moans in response.

When he takes your hips in his hands again, you know he’s there. He’s just waiting for you to fall first.

You give in to him, feeling yourself close around his length, throwing your head back in pleasure as your second orgasm washes over you, igniting every inch of your body.

Joel’s groans meet yours as you lean forward again, slowly rolling your hips to coax him through his own orgasm. Watching him release, buried deep inside, he looks so good that you feel like you could cum again just at the sight.

You feel his cock start to go limp inside you and when he opens his eyes, panting, you smile sweetly at him.

“Fuck, darlin’.”

You giggle, hips still driving gently against his. “Good?”

“So good, baby, did so well. You’re gonna be the death of me,” he whispers with a trembling breath, taking your waist in both hands and giving it a tight squeeze. You roll to the side, letting his cock slip out of you, condom full of his seed.

You tumble onto the mattress beside him, both heaving, moaning messes. Your chests rise and fall in sync, fingers tangling and untangling by your sides.

Then Joel gets up, and wanders over to the bathroom, where you watch him through the open door as he pulls the filled rubber from his soft dick. He bins it, then runs a facecloth under the faucet, dabbing it across his own forehead as he makes his way back over to you.

You can’t hide your grin as you watch his naked form approach; tan lines where his t-shirt must end, dark hair decorating his arms, legs, chest, the base of his cock. He sits at the edge of the bed, arm outstretched with the flannel in hand.

You go to take it from him, but he doesn’t loosen his grip. Just pats it over your face gently, soft gaze on yours, your fingers intertwined around his wrist. Your eyes fall closed, the cold cloth a relief against your warm, sweaty skin.

“Feel nice?” he whispers.

You nod in response. Your chest swells at how soft he’s being, how tender. When he stands to throw the flannel back into the sink, you almost find yourself reaching out to hold him down.

He climbs over you, springing back down onto the mattress with a heaving sigh.

You prop yourself up and shimmy over, positioning yourself on top of Joel, chest-to-chest. He looks down and smirks, running a lazy hand across your cheek.

“You’re so good to me,” he mumbles.

You tilt your head with a smile and lay down on his chest. You can hear his heartrate slowly calming down. His fingers twist through your messy hair.

“I have no idea what you’re laced with,” he says, “but you got me.”

You smile. “Yeah?”

Joel nods. You shift positions, adjusting your aching hips safely between his thighs. “You hurtin’?” he asks.

You nod. “Mhm. But I like it. It’s you.”

Joel’s hands run through your hair and his fingertips trace your shoulders. His touch is so light it almost tickles. You turn your jaw and kiss the back of his hand.

“My dad gone, Sarah out, free house…” you mutter.

“Hm.”

“So, you invite your mistress over.” You lift your head, smirking at him.

Joel’s chest vibrates with laughter. “You ain’t my mistress.”

“Oh really? What am I, then?”

“I am not having this conversation at 4AM, kid. Ask me again tomorrow.”

You’d think of something to throw back at him, messing with him, but your entire body aches, and your heavy eyes are starting to fold closed with how sleepy you suddenly feel.

You pull Joel’s sheets over yourself, turning your back to him. Joel instantly follows suit, pulling up right behind you, your back tight to his chest, his thighs cupping the back of yours, then slipping one between your legs.

His arms lock around your torso under the sheets. Safe. Secure. Nothing can happen to you as long as he’s got you.

“Ten,” his voice mumbles against the back of your head.

You turn so your ear is pressed against his lips. “Huh?”

“Ten. That’s my number. Includin’ you.”

Oh.

He doesn’t ask to hear yours. You wouldn’t mind if he did, but he doesn’t. You don’t think he’s telling you to hear yours in exchange. He’s telling you because you asked. He’s telling you because, whether in attempt to turn him on or simply to know something about him that you didn’t before – something nobody else knows – it mattered to you.

He’s telling you because you matter to him.

You nuzzle back into him a little, a form of reply, and, as you start to fall asleep, you feel him place a gentle kiss to your ear.

----------

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[bitchimasnake-sss]

sfw alphabet ft. roronoa zoro! (because im down bad for him)

enough horniness, now we shall weep and cry cause of how much we love this moss head 🤭🤭

yes ur honor this is the man im in love with :/

💗affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?):

affection (in it's traditional sense) comes hard to zoro. he doesn't really know how to go about it to be very honest. to him affection is sarcasm and acts of services ("acts of service" include calling you mid in 5 languages (joke), making fun of your exercise form and the way you sometimes drool in your sleep, offering you sake etc.). but as time passes by and you both start getting more comfortable with each other, he gets on board with it. every time you both are spending time alone, he holds onto you one way or the other. don't expect him to call you sugarcakes or something because he won't but he will let you know before drifting off to sleep that you mean the world to him. i dont think hes a huge pda guy but if he's super drunk then he cannot possibly keep his hands off of you, its quite weird for the crew to see him so openly affectionate (cue sanji gagging).

💗best friend:

what would they be like as a best friend? how would the friendship start? he's lowkey the bestest of best friends. he has the energy of "idk what you're doing but ig do it anyways cause i know how to fight" an opinion on everything but he doesn't have the time or energy to say anything (between his sleeping and training). doesn't mean he's any less nonchalant, no, he's just super opinionated for some reason. so, when you're sitting next to him on the deck on those late nights, asking him absurd questions, best believe he will deliver peak (nonchalant) commentary. especially after the two years when he's back from living with perona!!! HE IS A CERTIFIED FASHION KING. "zoro," you nudge him and he hums in response, "i was thinking of getting nami that silver bracelet for her birthday, should i?" "i mean i wouldn't give that debt collecting witch anything but-" he winces lightly when you punch him in the arm, "-but. i think silver will look look washed out against his complexion. gold seems better" "you think?"

💗cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?):

at the start, he thinks cuddles are lowkey dumb (and like he probably has gone years without them), so, he puts up this weird drama like "uh no i dont wanna do it" ofc he's lying. cause you're so soft and you smell so good and his hands are literally shaking trying not to hold you against him. after a while, he will unironically announce to you that he is the little spoon tonight and you need to suck it up. (lowkey gives the best cuddles because he literally envelopes you whole till you have to physically push him away) he wants to cuddle but you're DYING. YOU JUST KNOW YOU ARE. because this man is a heat radiating hot heating device heater. he is like a portable sauna. he needs to give you some space but he wont.

💗domestic (how are they at cooking and cleaning?):

cooking? cleaning? you should be grateful that he's showering everyday ever since you started dating him. he knows some basic cooking and cleaning skills (cause he did survive on his own for a good few years) but he doesn't know them in a socially acceptable manner. he just caught a fish, burnt it and ate it cause ✨proteins✨ okay? it's not like he does it on purpose, it's just that he's too focused on training and getting better and you have a chef so, he doesn't have to bother too much about it. but if you both were living together, then i think he will obviously learn them cause he doesn't want you to be the only responsible one cleaning after his messes. and he actually has kinda started liking cooking cause it's relaxing (he's also good at chopping up veggies and stuff so you both can cook together). the only part of cooking he hates is when sanji starts giving him tips cause like genuinely, sanji mind your own fucking business okay he'd learn pasta himself. tldr; the first time you teach him these things, he makes a mess and almost burns down your house but afterwards, you can rely on him to get the things done semi-nicely.

💗ending:

if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it? i think if zoro had to breakup with someone it will probably be over focusing on his dreams of being the best swordsman or if you cheated on him or broke his trust. i don't think he will pursue a relationship with someone if he didn't see it lasting, so, he won't break-up for petty reasons (nor do i think he will ever cheat). i also think he's a practical man. he won't try to sugarcoat or make you false promises. he sure as fuck won't tell you that you both can "still be friends" or some shit (i mean unless you're in the same crew then it kinda goes without saying). he'll probably ask you to come have a chat with him. sit you down and tell you directly and exactly why he is doing it. and he absolutely won't let you have any residual doubts if you "weren't enough" for him or so. just because he has to make this decision doesn't mean he doesn't love or respect you. so, even tho he won't ask you to be friends, if you ever need someone to rely on, he will be there for you. bottom line, he will still be a friend to you (though prepare to ignore each other for a long time after the breakup cause obviously it hurts and you might punch him)

💗fiance(e):

how do they feel about commitment? seeing as his character is super ride or die, he definitely doesn't have a problem recognizing how much you mean to him. but he is pretty emotionally constipated, so, he will take an eternity to actually accept how much you mean to him in a non-friendly manner. how quick would they want to get married? settling down??? no. he's not settling down. not until he's the best swordsman atleast. marriage is lowkey scary to him cause he didn't grow up with healthily functioning relationships to look upto but once he started dating you, he could see it potentially being a "forever" sort of a thing. he's probably not gonna say that out loud tho, thats a topic reserved only for wayward day-dreams or super drunken nights. so, as for the marriage thing he'd want to take his time. he would probably choose to achieve his own goals (and support you to reach yours) and then, think about settling down.

💗gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?):

physically: zoro is acutely aware of his super-human strength but it still comes as a shocker to him to see how fragile, almost dainty you are in compare to him. simple things like comparing hand sizes or how large his t-shirt looks on you when you wear it to sleep genuinely leave him awestruck (and slightly lovesick). so, he makes it his number one priority to always be gentle to you, as if he's scared that you're on the cusp of breaking. and he treats you as such always. (unless you ask with tear-lidden eyes and trembling lips how badly you want him to demolish you because then, maybe he is ready to comply) emotionally: like almost everything else, gentle words come hard to him at the start. all he has known is tough love. so, understanding that making fun of you when you're having your weekly breakdown was the wrong choice took him a while. he's not like emotionally stunted but he still doesn't trust his choice of words to comfort you. rather, he lets the way he holds you against him and pets your head when you sob against his chest do the talking. but if you go out of your way to teach him what he should probably say when you're sad then he might have some luck with it. until then, enjoy the cuddles.

💗hugs:

do they like hugs? after starting to date you, this man realized he loves hugs. and he loves giving hugs. but he's incredibly selective and thus far the only two (2) candidates have been allowed to pass through his tedious selection process. that being you and chopper (both of you are in a binding contract so you cant tell anyone about it either). well, luffy too if you count how clingy he can get 👍🏼 how often do they do it? he does hug you atleast once a day even if it as subtle as holding you from the back, resting his head on your shoulder. what are their hugs like? his hugs are genuinely bear hugs. okay. like he will engulf you and you will stand back and allow it to happen. he doesn't really hold on too long tho, so usually you gotta pull him back towards yourself and hug him tighter when you want it to last longer. pulling him towards yourself usually ends with him smiling and pressing a chaste kiss on your temple as his hands snake around you yet again.

💗"I love you" (how fast do they say the L-word?):

i think he says it fairly sooner than you anticipate. like however long you think he will take, it takes significantly lesser time. this is because (as i said), he probably spent a long time in denial and then in pining, so, naturally by the time you got together, he was sure of his feelings for you. anyways, one of my first fics on this blog was of how zoro probably said "i love you" to you when he was drunk and forgot about it when he woke up the next day. i still stand by that. i think it was a genuine, drunken confession but when you shyly confronted him about it, he just replied, "yeah, i meant that. i love you." his words were nonchalant but you could notice the dusted pink of his cheeks when he admits it and then his unsure gaze as he looks over your face and then the ground. (truth is, he only acted nonchalant. internally he is ready to jump off the ship incase you didn't say it back. thank god you said it back.)

💗jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they’re jealous?):

omg this man is simultaneously the most secure and the most jealous whore in this world. does he know you're not gonna cheat on him and ignore practically any man throwing himself on you? yeah, he knows that. but does he also want to cut off all those guys' heads if they even look at you? kinda, yes. i think he gets really shy to admit he's jealous. like he'd blame his irritable temper on the weather or the fact that he got less sleep last night. but you did notice how he clenched his jaw when a random guy in the market had been ogling you. and so, you tease him relentlessly. "zoro," you laugh, poking him in the chest accusingly, "are you sure? i think there might be something else going on" "like what?" he huffs, "i just got less sleep last night." "babe are you like jealous?" "no-" "you totally are" "stop saying that" "jealoussss" as to how does he deal with it? he fucks you. quick 'n easy. (im so sorry if youre a minor and reading this, in that case he pillow fights you to death.)

💗kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss you? where do they like to be kissed?):

what are their kisses like: after a long day, he always unwinds with you. so, his kisses are usually slow. he relishes in the way your lips feels against his, the way your cheeks feel like under his palm and the way you smile at him when you pull away. there's no haste because he has you right there and you both know you're not going anywhere. but on those nights he's pent up, anger and frustration strewn across his veins, he chooses to kiss you till he forgets just what he was angry about. his kiss-bitten lips are hot against yours, his hand roughly kneading your waist as he pours his anger into your desperate kisses. where does he like to kiss you: in public, his favourite spots are definitely your cheek or your temple as they are relatively tame pda tactics but still gets the point across. he gets to show his affection towards you without making a huge show for it. he also loves kissing on your shoulder as he rests his head on your shoulder and holds onto you. he can feel your pulse under his dull, soft kisses and heard your breathy hums and moans.

💗ittle ones (how are they around children?):

well, i hate kids. so, im gonna be biased. okay i don't hate kids but i hate toddlers. fucking devil spawns. i truly believe they will sacrifice us all for the beginning of the dark ages. anyways, zoro's not great with kids in theory. but somehow, when he interacts with kids he does end up somehow being a good (annoyed) dad figure (remember when he fathered three kids? cause i do)

💗mornings (how are mornings spent with them?):

morning with this green-haired ass start with you pushing his heavy arm off of you. you mumble that you're hot, trying to turn away from him and into the cool sheet. but it's no use because he just traps you against him yet again. zoro definitely doesn't give morning person vibes so i believe you are up before he is. you run you fingers softly against his scalp, bringing down your drumming fingers to his bare shoulders. you press an innocent kiss to his forehead and smile when he leans into your faint touches. when he finally wakes up, he looks up at you through sleepy eyes. he greets you with a tired "morning" before closing his eyes and draping himself you again. "zoro" you whisper half-heartedly, "everyone else is up, come on, we should get up too" he mumbles into your skin, "they weren't the ones keeping a watch last night, were they? come on, 10 more mins." "zo-" "please" he looks up at you, flashing you a soft smile, "10 mins." "10 mins only, okay? then we get up" (well, 10? more like 2 mins. luffy started yelling about breakfast and tried to eat before the food was served. and so, sanji (naturally) kicked him to near-death, so, you both had to wake up)

💗night (how are nights spent with them?):

walking out of the shower, you dry yourself off before cladding yourself in your pajamas. your limbs feel tired, body devoid of any and all energy as you climb into your bed to relax. sometimes you read, other times you just stare at the ceilings and think about stuff (we've all been there). zoro usually slips into the room silently, closing the door behind him. he plops down next to you and you curl up against him. sometimes, you both exchange small talk, if something fun happened while the other person wasn't around or gossip you heard from nami and ussop. but most days, you both simply enjoy the silence in each other's company till you're ready to fall asleep. every once in a while, he slips into the shower with you. (keeping this kids friendly) he gently washes your scalp and you rest your bare back against his chest as you ease yourself into the warm water. you return the favor by giving him a back massage. after this youre both so tired that you immediately pass the fuck out.

💗open:

when would they start revealing things about themselves: i feel like he'd know a lot about you before you find out anything important about him. he wears his loyalty and his dreams on his arms, but you don't find out why his dreams are so important or why he is so fidgety around tashigi until you're a good few days into dating. other small things about him are revealed to you thru his actions as he never mentions them, so, be prepared to be a persistent observer. do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly: he always reveals himself in little ways, never revealing too much. not because he doesn't trust you but because he's never had to talk about anything like this out loud. but anytime he does end up telling you something, it ends up being a heart to heart conversation. also, since he does get very drunk very often canonically, i don't think he's the type to slip up and tell things only cause he's not in the right headspace. so i imagine he only tells you things sober and in solitude, further cementing his trust in you.

💗patience (how easily angered are they?):

in moments of actual anger, as a swordsman, zoro is pretty good while handling his emotions. he knows how to differentiate between irrational feelings and actual solutions needed to get to the bottom of something. so, even when he gets mad he wouldn't necessarily act on it unless and until it is truly something that makes him tick. and things that make him tick includes people talking/doing something wrong to you or anyone in the crew, in that case he's going god mode. that being said, he will get easily irritated if someone is just joking around in the crew (especially sanji). he's incredibly patient with you tho, so, don't even worry about it and just accept him dumb antics for what they are.

💗quizzes:

 how much would they remember about you? i see yall sleeping on my man and i hate it. yes, hes kind of an idiot and not the best with memory but if it's anything about you or your relationship?? best believe he knows everything like the back of his hand. but he only claims that kind of power when it comes to you cause he will not really bother to remember other stuff if its not important. do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything? even though he wouldn't outright keep saying he remembers, he will often mention it in passing. like if you bring up someone while recounting a story to him, he will probably remember the last time you mentioned that guy. that being said, his memory is still kinda ass. so, he sometimes mixes things up if they aren't that relevant to the plot. so forgive him okay? hes trying

💗remember:

 what is their favorite moment in your relationship? i def feel like zoro prefers the mundane moments with you over any extravagant things. living on sea is insane, it's one thing after the other so knowing he has you to himself even for a few hours and in those hours, he gets to do nothing but love you truly means a lot to him. he isn't a cook by any means but this one time, when the rest of the crew had gotten off at a new island to restock and had only left you and him to keep guard, you had suggested you wanted to bake a cake. "i don't know how to cook" he mumbled softly, trying to convince you otherwise, "i can only do some cutting, slashing yk" "you dont even have to do anything!! just sit there and look pretty, i can do the baking." he eventually caved in. but now the memory of you making batter while he sat on the counter, talking to you is etched onto his every nerve. there had been a little bit of flour on your eyebrow and he used his thumb to clean it away before pulling you towards him and kissing you hard. you looked up at him, "i love you" "i love you too"

💗security:

how protective are they? i feel like zoro isn't as territorially protective as one would assume. like i said in the best friend section, he is more a laid-back "i know how to kill and get rid of the body, do whatever you want" kind of a vibe. that doesn't mean that he isn't gonna be on the verge of pulling out his swords the second someone even utters a word against you (but usually his dirty looks get the job done before he even pulls out the swords) how would they protect you? slash slash, stab stab and cocky remarks at the opponent (sometimes pure, unfiltered rage) how would they like to be protected? he's the roronoa zoro, he doesn't need physical protection. that being said, he wouldn't admit it out loud but just because he doesn't need you to pull out a gun to save him doesn't mean it doesn't give him pesky, little butterflies in his stomach whenever you defend him with your words. even if its something as small as calling out someone else's jokes that were targeted at him (and were just straight up offensive). or getting into actual verbal altercations (it happened once when you were drunk)

💗try: 

how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks? not a lot, tbh. look hes tired, you're tired, just cuddle and sleep okay? that being said he does put decent amount of efforts to surprise you every once in a while. he doesn't put on an extravagant show, so, mostly his surprises are just kinda lowkey and sweet. so on your anniversary, maybe he'd finally get the stick out of his ass and accept nami's idea of booking you a table somewhere expensive. but the memorable part isn't that, the memorable part is him asking (almost) shyly if you just wanna walk around town after dinner while he holds your hand and you bitch about your crew (in a loving manner).

💗ugly:

what would be some bad habits of theirs? omg obviously the drinking!!! i know he has high tolerance and shit but bro your liver's practically CRYING RN. please introduce yourself to some healthier coping mechanisms other than drinking and going stabby-stab. i also do think he's egoistic (it lessens with time) but its still a pain in the start

💗vanity:

 how concerned are they with their looks? this man does not give two fucks about his looks, like legit couldn't care less. he does know he looks decent tho (i mean casting mackenyu was a choice, i see you oda sensei). but ever since dating you, he has been putting in little efforts. i think partially cause you bully him into having a skincare routine and showering daily and partially cause he just wants to be a pretty boyfriend to his favourite girl.

💗whole: 

would they feel incomplete without you? yes and no. this is conflicting cause on one hand, ofcourse your absence will be equivalent to having daggers through his heart. but also, he seems like the guy who hyper-focuses on themselves after a breakup. i don't think he'd feel "incomplete" without you if you both ever broke up cause however dumb he is, he knows sometimes things don't work out and that's that. besides, even if you have to go, he still have people (the crew) to love and care for. but he would feel that glaring absence and it'll take a way heavier toll than anyone anticipated (cue him blasting heavy metal in his room and face-timing perona drunk and (almost) crying. perona suggested she takes care of you which made him actually cry cause perona dont be fucking mean)

💗xtra (a random headcanon for them):

zoro is so good at doing eye makeup specifically. i mean like because of all the sword-training and all, he has really good hand-eye coordination and very precise movements. so, like if you asked him to do your liner and give him specific-ish directions for how you want him to do it, he will 100% ace it. he doesn't really do well in other departments but he can learn (if you can make him learn thru that attitude of his) also, i theorize that he's ticklish but in the randomest fucking places. one time you lovingly ran your hand through his hair, bringing it playfully down to his nape and he fuckING GIGGLED?? another time you offered him a leg-massage cause he seemed to have pulled a muscle and you were working on his calf, trying to help him out and he yelped cause it tickled???? hello what do we do with this info now?

💗yuck:

what are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner? he wouldn't like judgmental people or people who are very uptight (cause although his jokes could be hit/miss, he doesn't wanna hear a fucking lecture). also dont be disrespectful to him/his friends. and also, i think he would have a thing against people who are too nosy (pre-dating mostly), like if he wanted to tell you something he would other than those basic things, he's chill.

💗zzz:

he's asleep before you can say "good night" because he's a simple man who needs to sleep 10 hours a day (minimum) see he isn't going off ruining lives, he's not fucking things up for someone else, he's just taking a nap. its like the least horrible thing he can do, let him nap. i do think he should get checked for some vitamin deficiency tho caue uh, just in case. that being said, you go to sleep now. i would too. goodnight!

a/n: loved making this so much that i might make one for literally every character ever once i get the time lol

[writerdream22]

requested by: anonymous, I really hope you like this ✨🌻💛

pairing: Chandler Bing x reader, Joey Tribbiani x reader (platonic), Monica Geller x reader (platonic), Rachel Green x reader (platonic), etc.

prompts used: “Have you ever seen anything prettier than this?” “Yeah, you”

warnings: mentions of smoking. English is not my first language so there might be some grammatical errors

feedbacks are always appreciated!

REQUESTS ARE CURRENTLY OPEN!

You did not like parties. At all.

It just was not your thing, and everyone knew that. That was the main reason why you had decided to stay home and relax rather than attend a Thanksgiving party with your best friends.

You did not understand why they were so attached to the tradition, anyways. The fact that you didn't grow up in an American household didn't help with that. Nonetheless, you weren't the only one who didn't always celebrate the festivity

“Do you have them?” Chandler Bing barged into your apartment. He held a couple of beers in one hand, and a bag in the other where there seemed to be some food.

“Yes.” you responded, sitting up from your sofa “I only had one quilted blanket, because Monica somehow couldn't tell me where she'd put the others. As for the pillows— well, I have two”. Chandler shrugged, then motioned for you to get going. You exited your apartment closing the door behind you, while silently hoping that none of your roommates came back while you weren't home.

───────────────────────────

There was a full moon. The city was still buzzing, it was amazing how its lights were never turned off. You loved it. And the company just added to your enjoyment of the night.

You'd laughed at Chandler's never-ending jokes for so long that your cheeks hurt, and you'd eaten so much that you swore you would never open a packet of chips again.

“Have you ever seen something prettier than this?” you questioned, looking up at the sky in awe .

Chandler stayed silent for a few, awkward moments, before responding. “Yeah” he said “you”.

What the hell?

“Are you... are you drunk? I can make you that strange smoothie that we always had in college, if you want—”

“— no, y/n” he interrupted you, rolling his eyes.

You were more confused than ever, so you asked Chandler what he meant by that. “I'll cut to the chase” he began “I love you, y/n. Everything makes me think about you: even when I just stare at the wall or drink a coffee, you're what's on my mind. And look, if you don't reciprocate my feelings, I totally get it.”

You couldn't find the words to answer coherently. Those damned feelings.

“Are you for real?” you questioned, to which Chandler responded “Yes. I know it's shocking, but I'm being serious this time”. He took a deep breath before adding that he was going to pass out if you didn't say anything.

“Oh, I'm sorry!” you exclaimed “Well, uhm... I love you too, Chandler. I have loved you since we first met... Since Ross and Monica introduced the two of us”.

He was clearly trying to hold back a smile, but he failed miserably at doing so when you nudged him and remarked that you had to throw out those “best friends” mugs that you'd bought as a joke a few years prior.

“Yeah... We should.”

You didn't think you could be happier on Thanksgiving Day.

[thisoneblackjacket]

Another example of Eddie's potential role in Welcome home

First of all: SUPER excited for the Barn Makeship plush!! I gotta save up for it really soon

But second of all: I can't help but point out that even in the advertisement, the theme of Eddie being "unwanted" or only there as the butt of the joke is still present

Now there have been instances (especially after the new update) of Eddie being snubbed/dismissed/isolated, here are a few good posts getting into some specific instances (and what it can mean) and we can see that in the new Makeship video too:

When Howdy is trying to explain how the plush can help "Keep your home safe from even the PESKIEST of UNWANTED guests!", who is the example that he uses here? Eddie.

Pretty harsh words to direct towards somebody just trying to do his job, right? Might even make a fella feel less like a welcomed neighbor than ever...

And as Barnaby is getting into his stand up routine, he mentions how he hadn't seen that many lemons (talking about the Wallys, very cute actually) ever since he had "chased Eddie up the lemon tree!"

Which seems a bit more of a rude thing to do to someone rather than funny. Poor Eddie was probably trying to not get hurt again

Not that the audience is really concerned though- they still readily laugh at it

The only person really tried to somewhat stand up for Eddie was Frank, (which might hint at them being more involved with each other than the others know (heck ye protect ur man)).

But the problem with that is that he's literally being labelled as a "Comedy Sourpuss™️", both here, and probably other instances. So while Frank might be giving a legitimate criticism of it not being funny (likely because it was at Eddie's expense), that itself can be easily be dismissed as him being only that. A Sourpuss that doesn't get Comedy and is just trying to ruin the fun for everyone else

It's certainly tough to say at this stage, but I have a hunch that as the story continues on, we might run into an instance of Frank trying to protect Eddie from this treatment in some way (here's a post I saw that gets into that a lil bit via the gelatin and pea dish symbolism).

However, I think he won't be successful in doing so, as the other neighbors (and on a greater scale - the show and its producers themselves) are just as easily ready to dismiss his arguments as him being "too uptight" rather than that of a legitimate concern, leading them to continue on

And while in usual circumstances it would be relatively fine for a show to have a character purely dedicated to being the butt of the joke, it might not so fun when that character has possibly become AWARE of being just a character for a tv show, because they might soon realize that they were only written/designed/wanted as the butt of the joke for that tv show, and nothing more.

This all to say - Eddie is really going through it right now, and there might not really be a way for anyone to help him out, even if they wanted to.

Who knows how and if he can continue to handle all that?

....

(tl:dr - The new Makeship video shows more instances of Eddie being labeled as unwanted/only useful as the butt of the joke, which might be a running theme/future conflict for him as a character in the WH story. If so, it will be difficult for him to escape that predetermined role in the show, which would put him in even more turmoil)

....

But anyways, thank you for reading yet another unwarranted, overanalyzing ramble based on like three new lines✨

[onyx-syn]

"All Eyes on Me"- LA! Husband! Buggy x Chubby! Wife! Female Reader

Warnings: Little to no plot, Some Fluff, Smut, Sub! And Dom! Elements, Flirting, Bondage/Restraints, Praises/ Some Degradation, Pre cum used as lube, Unprotected Sex (no pulling out), Body Worship, Pet Names and Foreplay

*Don't steal my writings and claim it as your own*

*18+ Only*

Summary: After many nights alone without your husband by your side due to his busy schedule, you finally get time alone to explore eachother once more.

A/N: ITS FINALLY HERE! I've had this idea for a while, I'll come back here and make some changes but for now let's just enjoy this piece ✨ (heh, get it, piece, like a piece of Buggy's body part, heh)

“You know, last time I was just my head in a bag was when-"

You turned your husband's decapitated head to look at you in the palm of your hands. Your fingertips gracing his painted cheeks, caressing them softly as you held him, "Shhh! Shush! Just - l-let me do my thing bugs", Not like he could see you. You covered his eyes with a thin black cloth which surprisingly did well at hiding your figure from his sight.

However, that didn’t stop the onslaught of lewd words from his red stained lips, smugly smirking as he did "Wow, getting feisty I see!” He started. “I’ve always liked that side of you doll~ What are we doing tonight hm? Am I gonna have to- eat you out like a feline? Maybe with some popcorn in there heh. Hold you down with my hands only? Or-"

“Bugs!” You cried out, puffing your chubby cheeks out ready to smack that dumb look of his face you adored so much.

You couldn’t really see it, but you watched his eyebrows raise a bit over the black blindfold, presuming he was rolling his eyes at you from behind them.

You cradled Buggy's head in one arm now, pushing his cheek against the fabric of your outfit clenching to your chest. You raised your free hand and flicked his head, which brought the clown a stinging pain, erupting a noise out of him.

"Okay! No need to show your claws missy" he exclaimed, pouting a little wishing he had his hands right now to do the same comeback to you.

You smirked down at him, giggling at your husband's reaction. "Well that's what you get~".

You have suggested the idea of switching things up tonight earlier in the day, wanting to do something 'special for buggy', quoted in your own words. You two haven't had the time to spend nearly as much together as you used to. With all the meetings he's been going to, talking with Alvida and such.

It didn't help that whenever he came back from those meetings, he would either be too busy sleeping or scheming his next show to spend alone time with you. Ultimately it did hurt you, but you understood where he was coming from.

So, on the day that he finally had off -no meetings, no show runnings, no rehearsals, no nothing- you told him that you two were going to spend time together tonight no matter what.

At first he was a little annoyed, joking and groaning to get your attention. You knew he wanted to spend time with you just as much as you wanted to. The nights he would come back to your quarters from the meetings, he would be exhausted from it all. He was more or less annoyed, as he felt like they weren't getting anywhere and wanted to call the big actions during the meetings too.

He would nuzzle up to your tummy once he returned to your bed together. Mewling into your stomach, his makeup smearing on it. He would grope your sides, pulling and jiggling them. It was like a stress toy for him, and he enjoyed it very much, amongst other things.

You pull yourself out of thoughts once you hear your husbands, still in your arms, complaining and questioning.

"Hey! Heyyy baby!~ You awake over there? Curtains are still calling" He manically giggled as he spoke, the way he would crack himself up with his own puns. "Where are we heading anyways? Where the hell did you take my body too? It feels like... Erm. Something I'm sitting on-"

You shook your head as your husband spoke, trying to talk and come up with conclusions on where you put the rest of his body at. As much as he would blabber on with this and that, it was endearing and sweet to hear him speak.

“We’re here, Mr. Dinkleberry” You say aloud playfully, walking up to your bedroom quarters that you both share and opening up the door with Buggy still in your one arm, who looked visibly confused even behind the blindfold.

“D-dinklebe- What the hell does that even mean?!? Are you making fun of my name now huh? Wow, after everything we’ve been through doll-”

“Oh my god Bugs!” You pinch his cheek, a bit of his makeup smudged on your fingers now. Buggy made a smile that resembled pain, but you knew he was only joking. You sat his head down on a little blanket with radiant sunflower tapestry on it on the dresser that faced your bed. Luckily, the tides weren’t bad outside of the ship, the waters were calm which would make it easy for tonight's activities.

Buggy, to say the least, was a little bit curious of what was about to happen. You and Buggy have always been adventurous in bed to say the least, so he was more excited than anything else.

Your husband was going to speak before he felt his breath hitch in his throat, feeling your hand rub his neck slowly, putting pressure lightly before you moved downwards. The tips of your fingers grazing the skin of his bare chest lightly, sending a shocking wave of euphoria up his spine.

Buggy gritted his teeth, wanting to tear this blindfold off of him to see what you were doing. A small sweat tear gliding down the side of his head. You held back a giggle, walking over to pull the blindfold off your husband. Once the blindfold was off, Buggy fluttered to keep his eyes open, getting used to the bright light now being in his line of sight.

When Buggy got back to his senses, which was pretty quick to say the least, he was greeted by the most wonderful and gracious thing he's ever seen. Your chubby body, in a beautiful sheer lingerie, clutching to your sweet rolls. The lingerie stopped at mid hip, making your flesh spill underneath making it look squishy and pudgy. Your breasts cupped perfectly in the lingerie’s cup holders, making a slight jiggle as you moved ever so slightly. Because of the sheer fabric, Buggy could see your nipples perked through the fabric, a bump against it. Buggy gulped, feeling as if his breath left him and went above the great clouds in the sky.

With the sheer fabric of the lewd clothing Buggy could see with his eyes your beautiful stretch marks. Buggy would compare the tidal waves out at sea to your stretch marks, how wavy they were and how they decorated your skin like the engravings of eroding wood of a ship from the waves. Buggy could feel himself lose it, his river color eyes looking up at you, almost in a puppy like form. Your hands were behind your back as you looked down at him, swaying your shoulders back and forth.

A smirk was plastered on your face as you looked down at your husband, leaning down so you could grasp his chin in your hands. You watch as his eyes glance from your eyes, down to your hanging chest -taking note of the stretch marks on them that he oh so wanted to kiss- and then back up to you.

You decide to break the sensual tension and speak up, "You like what you see?~" you question playfully.

Buggy responded with a toothy smile plastered on his face, making his red stained lip stick perch up almost all the way to the top of his cheeks.

"Very much, my baby~"

You giggle lightly, letting go of his chin and start walking over to the bed. Buggy disrespectfully looking at your ass, watching you sway your chubby hips as you walked over to the bed. He wanted to do so many sinful things to your body it was unbelievable, grip harshly onto your love handles and feel your weight bounce off of him.

You walked over to the bed, lifting your hand as you slide up and down his chest once, slowly getting on top of the bed, putting your exposed cunt onto the crotch of his pants. You bit your bottom lip as you felt his clothed bulge collide with your pussy. Rolling your hips to gain friction, a small bubbly feeling created in the pit of your stomach, it felt good and erotic. His chest was bare, his skin glistening in the light illuminating from the lantern next to your bed. The only thing that covered him was just his pants, the part he desperately wanted off so he could rail your beautiful self.

You moved your body just a smidge downwards, jiggling a bit as your hands caressed the sides of his thighs, watching him tremble underneath your touch.

"y-you!" Buggy exclaimed, biting the inside of his cheek. Buggy had many sensitive spots that he liked to be touched at by the grasp of your hands, even through the clothing. His thighs were part of the case.

Of course he could just attach his head back but... oh fuck he wanted to be a good boy for you. After all these stressful meetings he wanted to be pleased and pleasured, just feel the righteousness of your love and attention, even if it meant he wasn't allowed to touch you just yet. He wanted to get the greenlit from you before he could enact all the sinful things he had in mind to do to you.

His breath hitched as he felt his cock be released from the comforts of his pants, the thick air he was feeling in the room hit his sensitive muscle. He bucked his hips in the air, your eyes glaring at the flesh of meat flop in the air as he did so. You couldn't help but let out a little playful giggle at the sight, truly finding enjoyment out of it all.

Buggy had enough, he used his hands -attached to his body- to try and grab you, only to make a noise of discomfort once he realized they were restrained by rope on each end of the bed frame. Buggy, although very pouty and ready to throw a tantrum that he couldn't touch you, was smirking with devilish delight.

"We're bringing in ropes now huh?~ very naughty from a performer to do my doll~"

He admitted, his body squirming underneath your chubby figure trying to break out of the ropes. The ends of your lips curled up, watching your husband desperately trying to get out and fuck the ever loving shit out of you.

"Does my baby boy want his wife to let him go?~" you ask, your voice oozing with sensual tense.

Buggy rolled his eyes, still struggling to get out of the ropes, "What does it look like dumbass, of course I do! Fuck you until your brains are pouring out" He said, not having an ounce of embarrassment as he watched in glee as you looked away from his staring, a flustered smile appearing across your face just now.

"I wanna do a lot of backstage stunts with ya baby~" He giggled.

You looked back at Buggy once you gained composure over yourself. You moved yourself back against the bed, laying halfway on your back but kept yourself raised on your elbows. The flesh on your hips and thighs expanding once your bottom half laid down, how squishable and pudgy it looked. Buggy loved your hips, how much he could grab and mark with just his hands alone.

You settled yourself between your husband's legs, spreading your big thighs apart to reveal your exposed cunt to your husband's head still perched on the dresser. Buggy's eyes were swirling in a lake of lust, seeing your fat pussy on full display to him.

The way your flesh was rolled up in the sheer fabric as you laid down, how it clenched like its life depended on it to your skin. You can hear the bed frame shake vigorously, like his hands were about to break the entire bed. You hiss as the air in the room touches your cunt, your clit twitching from the sudden contact.

"fuck~" You whisper under your breath, surprisingly buggy didn't hear, too focused on trying to get out of the restraints cursing at how tight it was. You knew he could easily get out of it, but you knew that he wasn’t a complete master at his trade. Regardless you loved him and even more so loved to tease him.

Your hand trails down from your breast down your belly, moving over the rolls that were prominent in your lingerie. You stopped your hand just at the top of your pussy, touching the squishy flesh lightly making Buggy go wild at how close you were to your entrance. You can see the desperation in his eyes, you knew he wanted to touch you -grasp- at your skin, mark all over your rolls and handles. Make you remember who you belong to.

You were in love with this dynamic now, smiling at your poor husband’s reactions as you slide a finger down your folds, mewling at how wet you already were. You slide another finger down, thrusting your hips up just a smidge that wasn’t noticeable. Your chest feels heavy all of the sudden, rising up and down a little slower now, your breathing becoming hefty.

You add two fingers into your pussy, gasping at your own intrusion. Moaning abruptly into the thick air. The heat of the room rushing to your chubby cheeks, you bite the inside of your cheek as you start to go further into your pussy with your fingers, reaching your knuckles. You continued to do this process over and over for a few moments until you found a nice rhythm, adding speed and pressure to your cunt fucking.

Buggy’s eyes were entranced at the scene in front of him, seeing you all flustered from your own actions. He was jealous that you could feel your own satisfaction while he had to sit back and watch. His hands tighten into fists, frustrated that he wasn’t gripping you by the hips and railing you into oblivion. His hips thrusted into the air, imagining you riding him, how he wanted to feel your tight walls around his hardened cock. Pre cum leaked from the slit of his red hot tip down to the base of his cock, gliding down the vein that started from the top and ended mid way.

"Shit" Buggy said aloud, seeing the slick of his wetness drip from the tip of his cock.

His mind started to sprout dirty thoughts seamlessly out of thin air making the poor head shut his eyes close. He imagined your mouth wrapped around his tip, swirling your tongue around, putting pressure onto his veins and underside of his cock, sucking the cum out of him. A soft whine erupted out of his throat, his cheeks burning hot which brought his makeup to grease now. His whine, however, did not go unnoticed by you.

You smugly pride yourself with a smirk on your face, throwing yourself off by your own pleasure of your fingers. You spoke, “Aw~ looks like someone is enjoying the show? Is my baby boy enjoying the show?~” You ask him, your voice in a low seductive voice ending it in an annoyed moan. Your fingers brought you great bliss but didn’t go far enough.

Buggy pouted his bottom lip, opening his eyes and looking away from your gaze, making an occasional glance back over to your position. To say he was upset would be an understatement. “This is unfair” He replied to you, sounding petty.

You didn’t respond, only shaking your head before you stop, reaching a spot in your fat cunt that boiled a pit of hotness in your stomach. You sped the speed of your fingers, trying to go deeper to hit your g-spot with little to no luck.

The speed of your fingers now started to make your flesh jiggle, triggering Buggy’s head to stare fully right at you, the struggling of his tied hands stopped, memorized at how much your body jiggled just from a single movement or touch. You let off a cry, desperately trying to reach that sweet spot of release but nothing.

A wicked smile started to form on your husband's face, a maniacal chuckle rumbling out of his mouth. “Does my baby need help over there now, hm~?” He questioned you, knowing what your answer will be, or should be.

Your breathing became heavier, arching your back as you deepin your fingers, putting on a real 'good' show for your husband's delight. To Buggy, it felt like you were edging him at this point, finding it a real big shame in his case that he wasn't gonna be the one to make you cum.

But you had a little scheme up your sleeve. You slowly pull out your fingers with ease, showing off how much you've stretched yourself with just your chubby fingers alone. You hummed in delight at the feeling, noticing how slick and glistening your fingers looked in the light.

Your thighs were quivering at the sensation, just the pleasure you brought upon yourself extreme your acceleration. You slowly but surely moved back on your knees, struggling to keep yourself stabilized as you crawled back onto your husband, straddling yourself on his thighs. You brought your hands and caressed them through his trousers.

You watched as he trembled again, hearing him let out a noise of enjoyment. You moved his trousers more downwards, showing off his bare naked skin to you. You felt heat rise up from your neck to your cheek seeing your husband so bare. It's been so long since you've been this close to each other, even the sight of his sweating head brought much euphoria to you then it has in so long.

You leaned down, pressing your precious lips onto his sweaty skin, tasting the saltiness of him. Buggy was so quick to reattach his head back to his body that you didn't even realize it until his body jerked under your lips, forcing you to lean back and almost have your neck attacked by Buggy's greedy red stained lips.

Your eyes lock onto your husband's, how desperate and lenient on kissing you, ravishing your body as if you were a prized steak for him to eat up like a lion.

"Baby, baby baby baby~" Buggy whimpered out for you, pulling at the restraints once more, wanting -no- needing to get out of them and fast.

You tsk at the man below you, he was at your will and command. You felt buggy hum in a sensual tone deeply under his breath as he felt your added weight switch back onto his hips, watching you straddle your thick hips onto his. Your dripping wet core was hovering over his cock, in one drop you would be in direct contact with his cock entering you.

Buggy could not get over the fact he could not touch you. He tried to thrust his hips upwards, colliding the tip of his cock with your folds as you tried to move away from the moving mound of flesh. He moaned at the contact, feeling how wet you were which sent a shivering cold sensation up his spine.

He let out a breathy sentence, "P-please i- hmmmm" he begged, throwing his sweaty greasy head back against the bed frame, sweat gliding down his body.

"I... I want you- fuck" He was embarrassed of speaking. His lust coated eyes staring into the ceiling before glaring back at you, licking his lips slowly as your rolls jiggled at the slightest movement once more. 

You smiled deviously at your husband’s pathetic excuse of begging. You trailed your hands back down to his body, feeling how sweaty his flesh was against your skin. You caressed him, moving your thumbs in circles around on his torso and side. 

Your lips started moving, “Does my husband want to be a good boy for his woman?~” You asked gleefully, your hips moving downward little by little. You bit your bottom lip once you felt the slit of his leaking cock touch the entrance of your fat cunt. 

Buggy nodded profusely, giving in to his predicament of his constricted hands. “Yes yes yes please i- Shit! I’m supposed to be on top fucking your brains out! Not like… Erm… This…” He admitted defeat. He loved the dynamic but hated it so much at the sametime. 

You chuckled, leaning forward and pressing your lips on his cheek, pressing many kisses on his face. You can feel his makeup melt from the intense heat of his cheeks, how much he was blushing and flustered from the ordeal you put him in. You moved along down his cheek, reaching the edge of his lips. You pulled back just enough for the tip of your nose to touch his. 

You began to speak, your hot breath sending goosebumps throughout Buggy’s body, his watercolor eyes staring right back into your colored orbs. 

“You want me?~”

Buggy gave you a toothy grin, giggling lightly, stopping abruptly once he felt his tip enter your core just slightly. He tried to thrust his hips up until you stopped him, pulling yourself off from intrusion. Your hands traveled up to his shoulder, moving your hand in the way to wag your finger in the side of his vision.

“Nuh uh, uh~” You told him, smirking devilishly at the poor man who was desperately wanting you badly now. You can see the desperation in his eyes, lust and hunger swirling in them like a pool of lava. 

He whimpered as you kissed him for a quick second, pulling away before he could slip his tongue deep into your throat. He wanted to feel you, feel your touch in more then just his exposed areas, he wanted to love you so deeply that his cum explodes in your and paints your walls.

"please! Just, fucking, fuck my cock goddamnit! I wanna feel you baby~" He proclaimed. "Feel your ice cream around my cone~" he giggled at his, otherwise, stupid joke.

However, you liked his response enough to give him what he so ever wanted. "As you wish, my husband~" you whispered against his lips.

Your lips locked onto his once more, as you pushed your chubby frame down onto his cock, moaning aloud in his mouth, feeling a burning hot creation being made at your regions. You felt his redden tip spread your wet folds apart. His pre cum acting as lube for his entrance way to your fat pussy. You hissed in the kiss, feeling tears amerge from the edges of your eyes as you felt his cock being swallowed by your walls as you continued to lower yourself back onto his hips.

Buggy was no better. His breathing fastened, his chest rising up and down heavily. His tongue swirled around in your mouth, dancing with your tongue as he took in the sensation of your cunt. Your walls were so warm and wet, coating him in your slick and bliss. He was sweating intensely, the euphoria of sex bringing heat throughout his body. He felt his knuckles burn from the fist formation of hands, trying hard not to break the bed frame from the restraints. His hips squirmed, pushing up a little out of instincts. He groaned as he hit the back of your wall, breaking the kiss.

You pulled up from the kiss panting, pressing your hands down on his chest as you sat on your knees. You cried out a moan, setting yourself on his hips now, your big thighs straddled on each side of him. You sprouted out curses underneath your breath, your cunt taking his cock fully. Your cunt walls stretch at the size and girth of his length, been a while since you've felt him this close to you and in you so it was quite an experience to re-experience once more.

You pulled your hands into fists, trying to get used to his size and length. You could feel his cock twitch inside you, sending a surge of pleasure throughout your pussy and up your spine.

"oh fuck buggy~" You whimpered out, trying to change your breath as you wiggled around, not noticing how your husbands eyes were entranced by the way your hips shake with each wiggle.

"Goddamn baby" He said aloud, thrusting his hips just a little bit. Just enough so he could feel the tip of his harden flesh touch your gushy walls.

"I wanna fuck you so bad, please please please... please just... fucking, FUCK ME!" He couldn't hold it in anymore, he wanted you, needed you, every part of your squishy flesh out on him. All your weight, all your gloriousness, put up on him so he can completely wreck you.

You nodded quickly, your face sweating from the intense heat brought upon your chubby cheeks. You shook your hips, trying to get comfy in the position as well as getting used to being on your knees with the slightly constricting lingerie.

"Yes darling, fuck I-i~" you huffed, holding yourself together, keeping your breathing steady.

You raised your hips up slowly, Buggy's river eyes staring at your folds lifting and spreading, showing his wet cock off glistening from the light as you lifted yourself up before coming back down on him.

Buggy jerked his head back, mumbling out a moan from his chest as he felt you clench around his entire length with your slippery cunt. He looked back quickly, watching you go up and down slowly, painfully slow for that matter. His ocean orbs staring in a trance at the way your rolls recoiled from you riding him. Oh, how gracious your skin looked beneath the sheer lingerie as it jiggled. Your stretch marks stretching as your flesh moves up and down on his cock.

He could see the ends of the lingerie that stopped mid hip losing its placement, moving up further slightly, showing off the dark imprint it left from its tightness around your squishy skin. The chest of your lingerie that cupped your breasts perfectly was also starting to let loose, the top of your breasts slipping out of the holding, almost as if they were gonna completely let loose and flash your husbands eyes.

Low huffy moans erupted from your parted lips, riding him up and down. You looked so beautiful on top of him, the way you had control of how you wanted to ride him, swallowing his cock hole in your wet core. You could feel a similar heat swirl in the pit of your stomach, a sensational lustful feeling that you've experienced before.

Buggy was so hard, it was starting to hurt with how much he just wanted to slam your hips and fuck you. He couldn't believe that you would do this to him, what did he do to deserve this punishment of not being allowed to fuck the most priceless treasure amongst the 4 seas that he claimed as his.

He was gonna fuck you so hard once he got out of the restraints.

And then, it finally happened.

You watched -your eyes clouded with sinful aura- as a light bulb clicked on Buggy's head, seeing him detach his right arm entirely, floating over to untie the restraints of his left arm and repeated the process with his right arm.

You could almost watch in horror as Buggy's torso and top half leaned up, wrapping his around your thick waist and pulling you in closer. You gasped at the sudden new position, feeling yourself lose the control of keeping yourself at your own pace and be in your man's arms. Your breasts pressed harshly against his sweaty chest, the tears of which stained through the sheer fabric of your lingerie. His cock still deeply inside of you, twitching aggressively as Buggy now had the power of switching up roles between the both of you.

You looked at Buggy with wide eyes, your hands raised up to grasp at his shoulders, taking note of how close and how tightly he held onto you.

Buggy on the other hand, was in a greed of delightfulness, sinfully smiling at you as his eyes narrowed at you, tightening his grip around your waist.

"My how the tables have turned, sweet cheeks~" He exclaimed, chuckling darkly. He lifted you up by the waist, seeing you whine at the empty feeling of your cunt, upset that he pulled himself out of you.

You let out a noise of surprise, feeling your entire body switch positions so quickly you could not process it fully until your back hit the warmth and comfort of the bed sheets, how soft they were to your skin. Your body recoiled as you hit back against the bed, sending Buggy into a crazy rage. He quickly went in between your legs, wrapping the thick mounds of flesh around his waist, letting out a hum in glee at how you could easily crush him with your thighs. God how he- no, not now, later maybe he could find out- but now was not the time. He needed to fuck you.

He looked down at you, seeing your beautiful self spread out across the sheets. Your chubby face burning from the intensity and movements, your breathing just a tad bit heavy from early activities.

Buggy loved it, adored it, adored you, loved you.

"God your so beautiful~" He mummers underneath his breath, pushing his length back into your pussy admittedly.

His eyes memorized with the way your lips parted, letting out a cry as you felt your cunt get plummeted with the hardened piece of flesh, taking it in whole. The way your flesh recoiled from the harsh thrust he gave you, his blue curls gracing the top of your pussy.

Buggy huffed out a low chuckle, his body surging with adrenaline or sinful delight.

"So perfect, so perfect for your captain, your husband, your director~" He slowly pulled himself out of your pussy, watching as the base was still coated in the slickness of your fat pussy and walls clenched around him, before immediately slamming back into you. Your body recoiled from that greatly, a little shred of fabric appearing from the lingerie, showing off a stretch mark that claimed your skin.

A sheer cry leaves your throat, gasping for air as you feel your insides turn into a gushy mess from the harsh impaling of your cunt, his tip touching the edges of your walls feeling you up. His hands grasped at your thighs, huffing out low breaths as he composed himself. Sweat dripped down his sides, his gloved hands wet through the fabric.

"Holy shit~" He mumbled, his mind becoming foggy. He started to thrust his hips in and out of you, his eyes focused on the way your rolls bounced off his cock, seeing you recoil and jiggle.

It was incredibly erotic.

His grip around your thighs became tighter, surely leaving a bruise behind for the morning. "So g-good, you feel so good baby fuck~" He praised you.

His right hand trailed down from your thick thigh to your stomach, gripping onto the moving flesh through the tearing lingerie. He sped up his pace, wet ludicrous sounds emitting from the slapping of skin that could be heard across the quarters near your room.

"Look at how beautiful you are, hmph, my wife~" He groaned out loud to you, smiling deviously as he began to pinch and pull at your roll, his hand ripping through the fabric which caused a bit of a hole to appear.

"So soft, so soft, so soft. God I've missed this, I've m-missed you my sweetcheeks~" he told you in a genuine tone, smiling still as he did so.

He was trapped into a deep entrance by the way your skin felt underneath his covered hands, completely overtaken by this sensational effect. How good your body felt underneath his touch, his grasp. How beautiful your moans sounded, sounding like music to his ears.

His eyes watched the expression of your face commence, seeing you become his drooling brain fucked wife spread across his bed just from his cock alone. His hips were deeply thrusting into your core, his tinted red tip hitting the back of your cervix which sent a thrilling shriek to abrupt from your wet lips, face burning hot.

"Fuck right there bugs! Right there!" You yelled, leaning forward to wrap your arms around Buggy's neck, bringing him down so you could hold onto him. He could feel your chubby flesh roll against his torso now. Buggy was in total bliss from how close you too were now, enjoying every second of it.

Buggy let you take him down, leaning down so his nose was right next to your ear. His hot breath sending a next heating shock through your body, already feeling overstimulating from the pleasure.

"That's it, that's it baby, that's my girl~" he whispered in your ear. His thrusts became unstoppable, going at a pace beyond this known existence.

He can hear your moans scream throughout the room, hoping the crew could hear how much you loved your husband and how much he was making you feel good. His harden flesh hitting the back of your fat pussy with every single rough thrust he gave into you.

You drooled out, "I'm. So. Close!~" you could feel the pit of your stomach curl tighter, ready to explode at any given moment.

Buggy took your words into effect. He leaned back up to his knees, his hands gripping your legs and pushing them forward -moving his grasp around your big thighs- your legs now beside the sides of your head. He loved the way it made your chubby rolls looked like a row of dough ready to be turned into deserts for the oven. He absolutely adored it to the ends of the four seas.

The new position gave him the advantage to continuously ram into you, hearing the sweet gushy sounds your slick pussy made from his cock. Your walls greeted him nicely, taking him in whole with no drawbacks, accepting his full size and length. Your rolls recoiling ever so slightly, however your thighs trembled underneath his touch. He knew you were getting close to coming.

He grinned, "You wanna cum baby?~"

You nodded, trying to find the right words to say but couldn't be able to pronounce them aloud to him.

Buggy licked his lips, tasting the old cherry flavored lipstick he applied way early in the day. "Do it~" his grip tightened, pushing his hips into you roughly, bringing a loud moan out of from your chest.

"Cum for me, cum for your husband. I want to hear you sing my name for the show. Every. Single. Show!~"

With one final push, his cock ticked your g-spot, sending you into feel euphoric shot. Your nails dig into his back, leaving deep red marks for later as your walls clenched down around his cock, warm liquid spurting out of you. You reached a point of total bliss, moaning still as buggy continued to slowly fuck into you before a deep rumbling moan left his chest, his hips stuttering a bit before his liquid spewed into your cunt.

His cum coated your insides, white of his product. Both of your eyes were clouded with a lustful aura, your room stenched with the smell of sex and sweat. Your thighs quivered as both yours and Buggy's cum leaked out of your puffy walls once he pulled his cock out of you slowly -almost cumming at the new feeling of fresh air from your insides- your inner thighs and folds burning intensely from the harsh thrusts.

Buggy could see how out of you were, and granted so was he. You both haven't been this 'passionate' together in so long, both of you couldn't help going this far with each other. It was most needed.

Many people wouldn't expect it, and dear god if anyone besides you found out, but he was certainly an affectionate man in bed surprisingly when it came down to the final moments like this, wanting nothing more then to craddle you in his arms and love you. He could be the most disrespectful man between your chunky thighs and then give you all the kisses in the world for you.

He rolled you both over in the bed, pulling your sweaty body onto his. Your poor lingerie was torn at this point, the fabric just barely hanging on as all your mounds of flesh spilled out and collided with his.

You breathed heavily, trying to compose yourself and find a steady point as your thighs shook with a great deal. Buggy wrapped his arms around your, keeping you close to him. He nuzzles his face into your chest, smothering his face in the valley of your breasts.

He kissed the skin in-between your mounds. The kisses weren't light, making sure his makeup smeared on your skin, but he made sure they were hard or rough, knowing how over stimulated your body was from his electric touch.

For Buggy, this, this was his heaven, this was his treasure, this was his favorite show. He had a deep love and appreciation for you that he hasn't felt for so long, and for a while he was worried that you wouldn't feel the same way for him anymore when he became busy with meetings.

You shakily hold your husband's cheeks in your hands, your thumbs rubbing his greasy skin as you moved his head from your breasts and made him look up at you.

You lean just enough to press your lips onto his, turning your head just a smidge so his nose could have a comfortable spot resting against the side of your nose or cheek. You both closed your eyes into the kiss, letting your lips do all the talking.

You moved in synchronization, letting your tongues intertwine with each other in a waltz like dance.

It didn't last long, however. You pulled away, a thin layer of salvia connecting your wet lips from his. Your lips went up and kissed his forehead, whispering softly, "I love you, my Bugs~"

Buggy's hold tightens around you, his hands gripping your walls as they spill over his finger tips. He has only ever heard those words leave the mouths of three people who are or once were important to him in his life.

His mother

Shanks

And you

Buggy always loves the spotlight being on him, no matter what, wanting the attention with every chance he gotten. He wanted all eyes on him, to see him shine, to have the chance to put on a spectacular performance, hence why the meetings he would go to would help him get the spotlight he wanted.

But he knew, the only eyes he needed was yours. His beloved. His wife. Your eyes and attention, was the only one he craved for each and every day no matter how he presented himself as a dangerous and cruel pirate to those who imposed a threat to him and his crew.

Buggy looked up at you as you pulled back, locking onto your colored orbs. He couldn't help but smile gleefully as he stared at the beautiful woman laying beside him, genuinely happy to spend time with you once more.

"I... I love you, sweetcheaks. My wife~"

[redr0sewrites]

I’m not sure if you take Helluva Boss requests, I know you take Hazbin hotel ones (I LOVE your Hazbin content, your writing is so ✨), if you do, could you make some Yandere Mammon headcanons? Tysm and I hope you have a wonderful day!

IVE NEVER WRITTEN FOR MAMMON NOR ANY YANDERE CHARACTERS BEFORE SO THIS WAS DEF A CHALLENGE, HOPE U ENJOY!!!

🥀Cw: yandere behavior, possessiveness, bribing, overall toxicity

mammon is the literal embodiment of greed and selfishness, and once he sets his sights on you, mammon wants you all to himself

hes the type to start off charming, sickeningly so, until his behavior slowly begins to become more corrupted and controlling

hes all about spoiling you, but not in a good way, he wants you to feel indebted to him

at first you marvel at all of the lavish gifts he gives you, but over time they become suffocating

he pretty much ignores your boundaries, mammon genuinely thinks he knows whats best for you

mammon does not take no for an answer, he pushes and pushes and pushes at your boundaries but turns around and makes you look crazy for snapping at such a silly thing! why would you ever get mad at him, especially when he spoils you rotten and treats you so well? (manipulation level 100)

absolutely the jealous type, at first he plays it off that he just "doesn't want to lose you" or "is worried about your wellbeing", but soon hes restricting you from your friends and family, making himself the sole focus of your attention

mammon highkey gets pissy when you aren't paying attention to him, and will try to coax you into paying more attention either through bribes or being ridiculously needy all of a sudden

he wants you to be his and only his at any given moment, and will even get mad or jealous of inanimate objects that hold your attention

he'd confiscate your phone or any social media you may have, he just can't have his precious jewel looking at other people, can he?

the more you begin to wither away and crumble under his control, the more overzealous he becomes

mammon can't understand why you aren't happy, how could you be so ungrateful? in his twisted mind, you're the one who doesn't deserve HIM

he'll make sexist, disgusting comments around you and will mock your discomfort. at first you think hes joking until you realize, no, hes quite serious

regardless of gender, mammon wants you to be his little house pet, always at his beck and call with dinner on the table and a pretty little outfit on

tears? anger? no, he can't have that. in fact, he'll try to pay you to shut up! mammon will give you gifts in the hope of getting you to quiet down, but its no use. no matter how fed up you get, he never listens. he might as well just lock you in your room if you aren't going to stop talking.... so, he does

if you ever try to leave him, be prepared for one hell of a break down

mammon will pull every abusive trick in the book- from gaslighting, to fake tears, to anger and outrage, he is desperate for you to stay, even if only to watch you crumble even more

if you ever manage to "leave", know that you probably won't be truly alone for at least a while. mammon has eyes everywhere, and for as long as he's concerned, youre his and his alone

hes def a perv too, but those r hcs for another time😇

HELPP IVE NEVER WRITTEN ANY YANDERE CONTENT BEFORE SO IM SORRY IF THIS IS ASS- IVE ALSO NEVER WRITTEN FOR MAMMON SO I HOPE I DID HIM JUSTICE HES SUCH A SHITHEAD (affectionate <3) i might make a nsfw pt 2 if anyone wants me too- anyways hope yall enjoyed!!!

[d34dlysinner]

hello, I hope you're well, I really loved your writing, but as I'm still not sure about certain blogs, I apologize if you don't write or I'm asking in the wrong way. Anyway, I would like to know what the kings' reaction would be to seeing MC sleeping on the couch after a heated argument? Feel free if you want to decline the request, and I apologize if there are any errors in English, thank you ✨

No worries, I do write 😭

I just take my time answering asks at the moment.

Your English is good btw! Thanks for liking my content!!

Satan and argument is probably the worst you'll experience. He wouldn't lay hands on you. He never would want to think of laying hands on you, but there will be screaming and running off to cool off. If he's very angry he'll take some time to cool off. It can even take a few days. Sometimes he would hear advice of others which can help him cool down. He at the end couldn't be very angry with you specifically. And after thinking how cute, and at the same time hot, you were he just needed to see you.

He returns to see you sleeping on the couch. He did sense that you were angry and he knew its because of the amount of time he took while cooling down, not even because of the argument anymore.

He likes it when your angry in general. Even now when it's directed at him. He doesn't feel the same anger anymore and just wanted to take you in his arms at that moment.

He joins you on the couch and shakes you awake. When you complained to him he just had to take a chance and ask.

"You want to vent your anger in a different way?"

You knew exactly what he was asking for and knew exactly that you being angry was arousing him too much.

But you felt some relief that he wasn't angry at you anymore as the problem of before was long forgotten.

Mammon would look at your tiny form on the couch. Asking himself why you would lie there of all places. It's very rare to fight with Mammon and when you do you both usually fix the problem and argument before sleeping.

The arguments most of the time would be you both disagreeing on something. Where you were more heated about the argument than he was. He had this demeanor where it seemed as if he wasn't taking you serious which makes things worse at times.

Seeing you sleep on the couch kind of was like a reality check for him. He would sigh before taking you to the bedroom so you can sleep on a actual comfortable bed instead of a couch.

In the morning he would apologise for acting nonchalantly about the problem and he'll cuddle a lot with you.

Leviathan would be by his own to cool himself after the argument. After a while of thinking he would walk around to search for where you were staying only to see you on the couch.

An argument with him could get very heated. It would be both of you trying to prove a point without seeing the other person's point of view. Or it would be something where you're very emotional and you both need some time to cool off because you don't want it to turn into a "screaming match".

After thinking about how wrong you were or how annoying you were Leviathan still had to admit that he should've listened to your reasoning before cutting you off multiple times.

When he saw you on the couch he sighed and woke you up so you both can try and listen to each other. After the talk he would embrace you and allows you to sleep peacefully in his bed coffin.

Beelzebub would look at you sleeping on fhe couch with a look of amusement pasted on his face.

An argument with him can start with just the way he says stuff. He can be nice, but he also can be very rude if he wants to. Normally he would do it in a joking matter, but at times he does forget to use a filter when he's being serious. He would either apologise later on or brush it off. At times he's happy that you don't take all his words to heart. He doesn't mean to scare you away after all.

When he returns to see you on the couch, still angry with him, he just snickered and joined you on the couch. He would hug you closely and kiss your forehead before apologising for his words.

[softshrimpy]

How To Woo A Hot Principal

Chapter 1/?: Step 1- Shameless Flirting

Summary: Working at the weathervane was exactly what you needed. The routine, the people, your co-worked. It certainly helped that a certain tall, blonde, fucking gorgeous woman happened to frequent the cafe. Now some may call hopelessly flirting with your customers inappropriate behavior.

But truly, when it came it Larissa Weems, who could blame you?

I’m just in love with Larissa Weems and a silly bitch. I hope you enjoy ✨🦐

Chapter 2

Cross posted to AO3 Here

HTWAHP Masterlist

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“Just because I like older women does not mean I’m a homewrecker.”

“Huh, interesting.”

“You’re telling me you’ve known me for three months now and this whole time you thought I was out here waiting to ruin a marriage?”

“In my defence-“

“I can’t believe this, I thought we were friends Kingston. Now I have to rethink everything.” You sighed, dramatically.

“You’re the most dramatic person I’ve ever met.” He chuckles.

You slap him with your cloth, scoffing at his comment before going back to cleaning the coffee machine.

You had been in Jericho for a total of three and a half months. It was a quaint little town, a bit hyper-focused on their pilgrim ancestry but not the worst small town you’d experienced. You had been working at the Weathervane since you’d arrived, enjoying the routine it provided and the socializing. That was where you had met James Kingston (A British man disguised as a regular person in your professional opinion. I mean what kind of name is James Kingston anyway?). The two of you had become fast friends, partly due to the work you did and partly because he found you hilarious and you found him tolerable. (this is a lie, you love him dearly.)

Working as a barista meant you got to know most of the residents of Jericho quite quickly. Some you found infinitely more interesting than others.

“Oh look its your lady crush.” James comments, wheezing when you whip around from what you were doing to stare out the window.

“Shut up, I just- I respect a woman in power that’s all.”

“Oh I’m sure its all respect in that filthy brain of yours when you think of her.”

“Fuck off.” You laughed, hurrying to the register when you saw her coming through the door.

“Good morning miss Weems.” You greeted, doing your best to shut your heart up and give her a relatively normal smile.

“How many times have I told you to call me Larissa darling.” She smiles, much to the chagrin of your heart-calming plans.

“She’s a bit slow this one.” James jokes, earning him a swift kick on the shin.

“Your usual, Larissa?” You ask.

She nods, chuckling at the two of you before moving to sit at one of the booths. Larissa came around often enough, usually in the mornings, you assumed before the academy day officially started. Sometimes she’d come around after dropping one of the students at Dr Kinbotts. You lived for the times she stopped by, almost always kicking James off the register if he was stationed there just to talk to her. So yes, you had a massive crush on the woman. But honestly? Who could blame you? She was a goddess among you mere mortals and you were simply relishing in her heavenly presence when you could.

Christ, you were a useless gay.

You finished making her usual, quickly doodling a small flower next to her name before taking it to her. You place it down on the table with a flourish, bowing dramatically.

“Your coffee my fair lady.”

She chuckles, shaking her head at your antics before standing, coffee in hand.

“Thank you, y/n. You always make my mornings delightful.” She hums, squeezing your arm as she leaves.

You watch as she goes, a dreamy smile on your face, before proudly strutting back behind the counter. James giggles at you earning him yet another smack with the towel.

The rest of your day is pretty mundane. Dr Kinbott stops by at around 12 for her usual. The sheriff comes around and gets an Americano to go (You suspect he’s actually just checking on Tyler.) Throughout the day you’re giddy thanks to Larissa. You often find yourself daydreaming about what it would be like to see her more often. You think perhaps you might actually implode if she were to ever have more than a two-minute conversation with you. You finish up the day with Tyler, letting him leave before closing up. All in all, a regular day in Jericho.

You were working your regular Saturday shift when Larissa arrived, looking rather upset. She placed her order and sat down at a booth, pulling out her laptop and getting to work. You made sure to put a little extra sugar in her coffee and grabbed one of the choc chip cookies before bringing it to her. You placed it down on her table, earning a mumbled thanks as she picked up the coffee. It took her a moment to notice the cookie, but when she did she glanced up at you questioningly.

“It’s on the house. You look like you’re having a shitty day so I thought you could use a little something to make your day a bit better.” You smiled, clasping your hands behind your back.

“You really are too kind to me,” she mumbled, taking a sip of her coffee.

“Pffft, Nah. You deserve it.” You brushed her off. You took a moment before speaking again. “I know we don’t know each other that well but uh if you want to talk I’m here. And I can give brilliant commentary, no advice though, I’d probably encourage murder or something equally illegal.”

She laughs, covering her mouth with her hand. You think her laugh might be one of your favourite sounds.

“That’s very sweet, but aren’t you busy with your work?” she asks.

At that, you throw your apron off and over your shoulder and sit down across from her.

“Galpin’s pretty competent, plus he owes me one anyway. So spill.”

She considers you for a moment, before heaving a sigh.

“The academy is receiving a new student next week.” She starts. “Which under usual circumstances would be fantastic, however, this student happens to be the daughter of… an ex-paramour of mine.” She mumbles, almost drawing in on herself.

“Did they do something awful that made you break up with them?” you ask.

“No actually, uh she broke up with me…for the man that is now her husband.”

You stare at her for a moment, mouth agape.

“You’re telling me someone chose to walk away from you? But you’re- I mean you’re gorgeous and smart and- was she blind?? Was she dumb?? I mean obviously, she was but… what.”

She chuckles at your outburst, cheeks flushing slightly.

“Yes, well, they seem very happy together. And I’m sure she’ll rub that in my face in some offhand way. And she’ll make jokes about me marrying my job because ‘no one else would want me’ which I-I mean it’s not- that’s not why I’m so devoted to the school!”

“She sounds like a bitch.” You comment, “I can throw hot coffee at her if that’ll make you feel better?”

“You’re very sweet but that’s assault darling.”

“I’d literally kill a man for you no questions asked, assault is nothing.”

She chuckles, swatting at your arm before sighing again and dropping her head into her hands.

“Well, look, I don’t know who your ex is, the stupid bitch, but you have become a talented, successful, absolutely gorgeous woman. So, no matter what happened between you or what she does whenever you see her, know that she’s just a jealous, silly old hag who could never be half as brilliant as you are.”

She stares at you at that, her eyes bright. You wait for her to say something, feeling yourself get more nervous the longer she stays silent. You play with your fingers, thinking perhaps you went too far and have now fucked any and all chances of having even a friendship with this gorgeous woman.

You stand up, pull your apron back on and do your best not to overthink every word you’ve said.

“Uhm, sorry, have-have a great day Larissa.” You mumble turning to walk away.

Suddenly she grabs your wrist, stopping you and turning you around. She stands up, towering over you. She looks down at you, a dazzling smile on her face. And then, by the gods, she bends down and presses a kiss to your cheek, and hot fucking damn you almost spontaneously combust on the spot. You stare up at her, awestruck and definitely blushing madly.

“Thank you, y/n” she smiles. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

And with that, she squeezes your wrist, giving you a dazzling smile and leasing the coffee shop. You watch after her like a lovesick puppy, heart racing.

You’re absolutely whipped for this woman.

Larissa didn’t come around for the next few days. But you knew she was a busy woman, she had things to do. You definitely weren’t considering changing your name and fleeing the country thinking she now didn’t want to see your face again after what you said and her thanking you was just because she felt awkward. Definitely not.

You found yourself glancing out the window every five minutes or perking up whenever the bell above the door would ring, only to deflate when it wasn’t Larissa walking in. You were busy wiping down one of the tables when James appeared at your side.

“My bestie in Christ, you know I love you, but you currently look like an abandoned puppy.”

“I do not,” you scoff.

“Sure, sure... Oh hey, Larissa!”

You whip around faster than you’ve ever moved in your life, coming face to face with an empty doorway. You scowl as you hear James wheeze next to you.

“Don’t forget we work with hot coffee. And accidents happen, Kingston.”

He laughs at your threat, patting your shoulder as he heads back to the counter. You continue working for a while before James pipes up again.

“Oh damn. Good morning miss Weems.”

“That’s it, give me the boiling water I’m giving you the wicked witch of the west treatment.”

“Now why would you be burning your friend at the mention of my name?” a velvet voice speaks from behind you.

You spin around on the spot, gaping at the woman behind you. There she stands, all tall and gorgeous and dreamy. You feel yourself blushing as you try to stand straighter and lean on the table you were cleaning. Unfortunately, you did such a great job that you slip and all but fall on your ass. You’re tempted once again to throw boiling water on James as he cackles at you. Larissa, the kind goddess she is, rushes over and offers you a hand.

When she pulls you up you realize you greatly underestimated how close she would be as you’re now toe to toe with her, staring up at her, cheeks aflame. She smiles down at you, her hand still holding yours as her other arm settles on your waist. You’re barely breathing at this point and then she has the audacity to flash you the cutest smile.

You take your chance to take her in up close, knowing you’ll probably never get this close to the goddess ever again. You notice the crow’s feet at the edge of her eyes and the slight bags under them she tried to hide with makeup. You also notice she smells absolutely fucking divine, you can’t quite pinpoint what it is but it suits her so well. You know you’re staring and you should stop, but you can’t help it.

“You should be more careful, sweetheart.” She murmurs, her eyes sparkling. “I wouldn’t want my favourite barista getting hurt.”

You’re still gaping at her, your brain turned to mush at the way she spoke, low and velvety. You open your mouth to speak but can’t seem to find anything clever to say, for once. Something she takes full advantage of.

“What’s wrong darling? Cat got your tongue?” she whispers, and oh god is she getting closer? She looks closer.

You’re startled back into the waking world when James accidentally drops something, the loud clanging making you jump back from the woman in front of you, heart racing and body flushed. Larissa drops her hands from their hold on you, stepping back slightly. You internally whimper at the loss of her touch and then immediately internally scold yourself for being so uselessly gay.

“So uh, how-how has everything been? I haven’t uh seen you around lately.” You commented, sliding behind the counter and getting started on her drink.

“It’s certainly been an eventful few days, to say the least.“ she sighed, leaning onto the counter.

“Well, you were dearly missed at our humble café.” You remark, placing her drink in front of her.

She chuckles at that taking a sip of her drink before letting out a relaxed sigh.

“God I could’ve used this yesterday.”

“The drink or my riveting conversation?” you joke.

“Perhaps both.” She hums.

“Well, I mean we could always deliver to your office on the days you can’t get here.” James offers, grinning at you.

“Oh no, I wouldn’t want to cause any trouble-” Larissa starts.

“It wouldn’t be any trouble at all. Isn’t that right?” he comments elbowing you suggestively.

“Oh! No of course it would- I would be honoured- I mean it would be my pleasure Larissa really.” You manage, giddy at the prospect of delivering her coffee every day.

“Really you don’t have to go through any extra fuss for me we have coffee at Nevermore so I-“

“You’re worth the fuss though.” You say, and then immediately want to shoot yourself for speaking aloud.

Silence falls between the three of you, Larissa looking shocked, James at a loss and you mentally preparing what to put on your tombstone. It’s a while before Larissa speaks.

“Well, when you put it like that how can I say no hm?”

“So, I get to deliver you coffee every day?” you grin, tapping the counter a few times in excitement.

“If that’s what you want, sweetheart. You can bring it to my office, I’ll expect you before nine.” She hums, turning to leave.

“Yes ma’am! I won’t let you down” you respond, giving her a mock salute.

She chuckles, waving at you and waits a fucking second did she just fucking wink at you?? Oh, Jesus on skates your life just keeps getting better and better. As soon as she’s outside and gone from view you all but squeal, throwing yourself at James.

[gatorbites-imagines]

I'm back wayy too early, Just as promised!👍🏻

How are you?

Would you like to explain, in the Reader of your choice that "Flaxans' king is kinda..", mister?🤨📸

Aaand that's It for now, drink some water mr. Allig-author, I'll do the same.

See you in the close future! ~💙🌺✨

Flaxan Leader x antihero male reader

Headcanons

straight up cant find any flaxan gifs

What do you mean 🤨📸 I said what I said 🗣️

Reader is kinda based on Deadpool, but with some tweaks. Insert also flaxan headcanons, cuz I thought it was funny.

Working with teen team had never really been something you planned to do. You were more of an antihero than an outright hero. Majority of the public didn’t even know about your existence, since most of your dirty work was done in the shadows.

But seeing as the guardians of the globe weren’t responsive, and you had been in this business for a long time, Cecil called in a favor you owed him, which lead to you fighting alongside this group of young heroes.

To you it felt like being a caretaker or kindergarten teacher, since you were older than all of them with a lot more knowledge and experience. Your lack of care about spilling blood and killing seemed to unnerve a few of them, invincible being one of them.

Your regeneration seemed to shock the flaxans you fought, as they’d blow your head off with their blasters, or would slice your limbs off, only for them to regrow in seconds as your damaged body kept on fighting.

Invincible may have scarred his face, but you were the one the one who would become the flaxan leader fought head on. You may not have super strength like some of the others, but your expertise made you even more of a bother to fight.

Since we know nothing about flaxans, let’s say that they flirt through sparring or fighting, so you being your joking usual Deadpool self could be seen as advances of some kind. The kiss you blow him as they flee the first time doesn’t help your case.

After the first invasion, I can already imagine the likes of invincible freaking out a little or a lot about how easily you kill and how you make a joke out of everything. It results in you having to give these young heroes a reality check, that being a hero isn’t easy, and that they’ll probably end up killing more people than they save. That’s your feelings about it anyways.

The second invasion has you involved again, since your extreme healing factor also means you barely need to sleep, eat or drink, as your body keeps itself going without issue. And once again you end up fighting the flaxan leader, whose now got a different look.

The first words that leave your mouth is ooing and awing, purring that you like em a little grey so you are happy to see him. All the talking you did during your first battle also meant that the flaxans, or maybe rather the leader, has a much better understanding of human speech.

The second invasion ends like the first, except the leader is too busy fighting with you to focus on invincible and atom eve, so Robot ends up finding their weakness on his own. Sometime during the fight your mask also ends up getting ripped off, letting you plant a big kiss on the flaxan leader’s forehead before they flee.

When members of the teen team ask why the hell you did that, you just shrug and make some comment about how you two “have a connection”. Its clearly a joke, because you take nothing seriously, but the flaxan leader seems to see it as legit.

The third invasion goes differently from the show, since the leaders risen up to rule all of his people, and instead of wanting to invade earth this time he comes through to court you, much to everyone’s surprise, both you, the teen team, and the media that’s been watching the entire time.

Imagine your surprise when the flaxan leader, now a good deal older and in a powersuit, rocking up to you with flowers native to his planet and what looks like a bracelet made out of similar material to his armor.

It takes some translation and some help from Cecil and his people to figure out what its all about, and honestly you feel a little chuffed at this big guy pretty much proposing to you after two fights. It seems completely out of the norm for humanity, but apparently its normal in flaxan culture.

In the end it helps create more of an allyship with the flaxans than them getting eradicated by omni-man. And you end up scoring a hot older guy who doesn’t seem to mind your many many scars. Its not everyone who can say their husband developed technology strictly to be able to exist in your world, is it? you definitely brag online about it, “if he wanted too, he would” and all that.

[anotherbluesunday]

✨Moodboard Teaser: In Technicolor✨

With the release of the first chapter coming in hot with its expected release being this Friday at the latest or sooner (possibly as early as tomorrow) I wanted to take the time to acquaint everyone with the primary couples in this story. Usually I cap it at two couples and have auxilary couples and characters on the fringes. But because this is a crossover between two of my favorite shows, I have expanded it to three—possibly four—couples with auxilaries (secondary) on the fringes. These couples will include original characters i.e. Wynn Galpin who is Tyler Galpin’s younger sister. There is a crossover couple that joins the Wednesday group with the Riverdale group. This couple is where I expect to receive the most backlash but idc. Their my crossover otp and I hope you all trust me enough to keep reading and join me/the characters on this journey. I have also switched some things up with one of the Riverdale characters because the ship only got screen time in the last season and it did more for their character than their actual failed relationships did the entire season. Fight me. But don’t. Or do.

Anyway, here are the couples moodboards, as promised. The visuals were inspired by Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo + Juilet because these past few months since January I have been on a 90’s and 2000’s kick and I am dying for how that movie captured the beauty, grit, grime, and excitement of LA. So enjoy and let me know what you think! 💜

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We open with our crossover couple who are the star-crossed lovers—Cheryl Blossom, the queen of the Palisades and star tennis player and Pugsley “Lee” Addams, the king of Elysian Heights and leader of his grunge sleeze band Texca. Born second generation to a working class defense attorny and day-time caregiver to the elderly, Lee Addams has just wants to make it through his senior year of high school and hangout with his friends on the weekend. But when he and his twin sister Wednesday step a little too far over the line at their old school their parents pull some strings to have their three children—Wednesday, Pugsley, and Pubert “Bertie” attend Morticia’s former high school. There, Lee unwittingly comes face to face with the campus queen, the indomitable and untouchable Cheryl Blossom. Born into privilege with the face of an angel and the bite of a viper, she has everything and anything. Influence thanks to her parents name. Adoration by way of her beauty. And power because of her abilities to manipulate others. But what happens when a hurricane meets an immoveable force? Will they fold? Destroy one another? What happens when the pretty vicious face isn’t all it seems to be and the cutting confidence is stripped away? Who are the real people that lie beneath it all?

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.

Next are our second pair of the four star-crossed lovers. While it is never a good idea to fall for your twin flame, for Tyler and Wednesday it isn’t so simple. Twin flames and soulmates fused into one as if it were a sick joke, their story begins at a party—the raven haired twin sister with her face painted like a Catrina (see: Dia de los Muertos symbols and iconography) and the Galpin golden boy dressed like Sir Lancelot with the sacred heart etched into his chest plate. Like her brothers, Wednesday grew up living a modest life where nothing was taken for granted and family sits at the heart of all major decisions. For Tyler, he has forgotten the importance of family and community after starting university where his life has evolved into an endless stream of parties and hookup’s. Never struggling but also never being challenged to be better or grow, he’s hit a wall. A mid-life crisis of sorts but at the already chaotic age of 18 with his 19th birthday right around the corner. But from the moment he lays eyes on Wednesday she is all he can think of. All he breathes and dreams of—a beautiful stranger that won’t free him. Yet when this silver tongued Casanova tries to approach the dark beauty he’s shot down. Challenged to question who he is and what he truly is doing with his life that matters. What is in store for the idealistic social revolutionist and her troubled admirer? Where will they land when the walls of his kingdom come crumbling down?

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The youngest of three siblings each yet one is protected and coddled like a greenhouse flower while the other has flourished amidst hardship and bouts of poverty. Wynn Galpin is caught in a never-ending loop of compassions to her twin older siblings, Tyler and Enid. Both are straight A students. Both star athletes with Tyler winning championship after championship for swim and Enid earning a full-ride scholarship to UCLA for volleyball. Both are charming and charismatic. Both are perfect and Wynn can never compare despite how she tries. She doesn’t have the passion for swim or volleyball so she chooses cheer. “That’s not a real sport” she’s told. Her siblings get A’s but she can hardly scrape by with B’s while battling her depression and anxiety. At all times, her mind is screaming for her to just run off and disappear. And after the loss of her friend and pseudo-sister Polly, the darkness has become more persuasive. More invasive and vicious. But it is during a spiral that forces her out of the gym during cheer practice that she runs into the new kid. The brainiac junior in her senior level AP classes. Pubert “Bertie” Addams. A carefree class clown with a heart of gold and the virgin Guadalupe drawn in vibrant neons on the bottom of his skateboard. Where will this new path take them when the class clown and the beauty queen who seems to always be in tears meet to form an oddball friendship? And what happens when their hearts begin to long for more than just friendship but their worlds couldn’t be more different? How will things turn out for the greenhouse flower and her sidewalk dandelion?

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What’s the worst that could happen when you fall in love with your best friend? What happens when you think they love someone else? When you think they could never see you the way you see them in return? Do you stand there and wait for them to turn around? Or do you walk away while piecing together your heart that will never know real closure? Reggie has asked himself these questions nearly every day for the past six years since his family moved to the fringes of the Palisades and enrolled him in the affluent junior high nearby. Archie Andrews was his first friend at his new school all those years ago. The first one to get up during lunch time and sit down next to him. The one who didn’t care that his parents weren’t from money and had only recently come into their fortune. The one who didn’t care that he didn’t have the newest clothes, phone, or hairstyle. Like a guardian angel come to save him from perpetual solitude, Archie befriended Reggie with a bright smile and a silly joke. And since that day, Reggie has kept his love for the redhaired boy wonder to himself. Has been the picture of what a bestfriend should be. Has supported Archie and defended him. Joined their high school swim team with him just so that they could live out Archie’s dream of being the one’s to break Tyler, the former captain’s, record and win more championships than him and his team did. Reggie has lived a beautiful but painful lie for nearly a decade and the cracks have begun to show. The devotion now agony. The love a barbed dagger twisted liettle by little every time he has to play third wheel on Archie’s dates with his girlfriend Veronica. But one night their eyes meet across a sea of moving bodies at a house party. Archie kissing Veronica but can’t stop looking at Reggie. There’s a spark. A sadness. Hope. But is there truth? Is there a willingness to be honest? To accept this attraction that has been there waiting from the start? Does Archie know what real love could be like if he just turned around? Or will the lovefool angel look away once again and leave the poor friend and saint in the dark?

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Stay tuned for more because this is only the beginning. Next will be the auxiliary couples, characters, and family boards for the three main ones at play. But the next next post that will be following this one will be the official titlecard for Chapter One. Can’t wait to see you all again there. 💜

[simp4konig]

Extension of @itsagrimm ’s post and conversation which we had 😇✨✨💖

Some additional Nikto headcanons

Word Count: 653

Tag List: ♡ @simpforkonig ♡ @rustic-guitar-notes ♡ @best-soup ☆ @lotionlamp ☆ @luci4theminorannoyance ☆ @happy-mushrooms ♡ @nightlyvoids ♡ @skeletalgoats ♡ @aethelwyneleigh27 ☆ @arrozyfrijoles23 ♡ @dobaddo ♡ @the-second-sage ☆ @wil-xyz ☆ @revnatheshadow ☆ @feelya

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Nikto is extremely bitter, and spiteful. His childhood was stolen from him from the moment he became an officer. In addition to this, his torture left him scarred — physically and mentally — and he is conscious of a childhood which he could have had, yet is unconscious of what the childhood which he did have was like. He either does not remember, or the memories have been repressed; either way, he recognises what he has lost, for he is met with the naively mischievous glint in the eyes of the boyish rookies that arrive with the optimism of a young, hopeful lad, and he is cursing under his breath in Russian, resenting the happiness and zest which they give off, contrasting the spite and bitterness which festers within him.

Perhaps he displays said “boyish” behaviour in order to reclaim some of the innocence which he had when he was a young boy; again, either it is intentional, and he behaves in such a way as to I personally believe that he doesn't even realise that he behaves in such a way: in Nikto's eyes, he has prematurely matured and aged, making him see through the lens of a damaged man; yet, that same lens may be making him blind to the boyish behaviour which he unintentionally displays, evident in the scraps of content that we are fed of him 😓

Maybe Nikto has two boys inside of him which define him, both the same age, yet different: one is the child which was robbed of its innocence and forced to endure atrocities unimaginable; the other is the child, innocent, which has been locked away, wondering why it cannot be let out. Neither is aware of the other, and it's all the more tragic.

Exploring this point further, Nikto being 28–29 is surprising, as he acts far older than his age. It's as if the experiences which he has experienced have aged him mentally, and he genuinely feels the pain of it all straining his psyche. It's tragic that someone so young was subjected to such torture so soon, and be forced to wear a mask 😟…

Given how the wiki states that “he has an uncanny ability… to hide his true identity”, it is ironic. What if from his perspective he has hidden his identity so well that there is none to be found anymore? What if he perceives himself as an actual nobody after having been done so immorally wrong? What if as a result of his torture and lasting trauma he has had his personality and identity stolen, just like his childhood, and is therefore unable to rediscover it?

…Maybe the mask is his subconscious way of protecting the remains of the innocent child, wanting to preserve the past purity of his child self (before being inevitably forced to mature as a result of his environment, and consequently his other experiences?*)

*Note, I can imagine that Nikto's childhood was robbed at some point as an adolescent, but he was still innocent and did not grasp what it was. After his torture, the truth behind his childhood may have come to light, and shed darkness on what was otherwise something positive. Furthermore, he could be clinging on to what little remains of that innocent child.

In addition to own personal headcanon (where he is blunt), he probably spouts the darkest jokes and has a morbid sense of humour. I don't necessarily believe that he would use humour to cope with his circumstances, as in all honesty, he does not strike me as man who indulges in idle banter like “haha i got tortured guys 😎,, sooo anyways 0/10 would not recommend 😰😰 — my other voices wouldnt either, trust 💪🙏” 💀,,

,,but, I certainly believe that due to how desensitised he has become to morbid matters, he has reached a point in his life where the horror amuses him, and doesn't affect him.

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A/N Finished writing this yesterday at 23:11 instead of actually fucking SLEEPING 🥱😫😫,, my priorities are notbthe ones that i should be prioritising lmfao 💀

Surprisingly posted something else 😱😱❓⁉️⁉️❗ this is VERY uncharacteristic of me!!??? I was supposed to post one post and disappear for ~3 months?? 🤔🤔🫡��🧐🧐🤨

Been reading Metro 2033 rn and its [Redacted, as the rant was two paragraphs] 😍😍

Not much else to say lmao — been existing i suppose 🤯

[harrywavycurly]

Eddie Munson x Not A Genie!Reader Part 2: Do you like it?✨

Part 1: Here

Tag List: @storiesbyrhi

A/N: I’m not sure what to call this series/story because you’re not a genie in this series because you don’t grant wishes BUT you do live in a bottle and help Eddie out whenever he needs it, but anyway enjoy!

To say Eddie is overwhelmed is an understatement as he looks around his living room. When he left for work this morning he had a sad excuse of a sofa, a coffee table that was one bump away from collapsing and a normal sized television that sat on an old dresser he used as a tv stand. But when he opened his front door after a long shift at the garage he all of a sudden had a brand new couch that looked more comfortable than his bed, a coffee table with random magazines and a vase full of flowers on it and a tv stand with a giant television sitting on it along with your bottle that had the lid off it letting him know you were somewhere in his apartment.

“Oh good you’re home!” Your voice is bubbly as you walk out of the kitchen with a cup of iced tea in your hand. “How was your day?” You ask as you hand him the glass and begin taking off his jacket for him so you can hang it on the coatrack by the front door.

“Uh it was good.” He answers making you smile as you grab his free hand and lead him into the kitchen. “You’ve been uhm…busy I see?” Eddie feels his eyes go wide when he looks at the table and sees its full of all his favorite things to eat.

“I didn’t want to seem useless while you’re at work and your couch wasn’t very comfortable so I replaced it but then it didn’t go with your coffee table so I had to replace that as well and next thing I knew your whole living room was…uh well what it is now.” Eddie doesn’t know what to say as you pull out the chair so he can sit down. “Do you like it?” Eddie hears a hint of nervousness in your voice making him turn his head so he’s looking at so you can see him nod his head and give you a smile.

“Yes it’s uhm…it’s great I just…how did you do all of it?” He asks as he watches you begin to make him a plate, that’s when he looks around the kitchen and notices your redecorating didn’t just end in the living room, he has a brand new refrigerator and oven as well as a whole new black plate and bowl set.

“I just make things appear…I figured you like the color black so picking the colors for your new dishes was easy…I almost picked pink but didn’t want you to be upset.” Eddie knows you’re joking by the way you giggle to yourself as you scoop some mashed potatoes onto his plate. “Just wait till you see the bedroom.” Eddie raises an eyebrow as he takes a sip of his tea you handed him when he walked in the front door.

“You redid the bedroom?” You just smile and nod as you put a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on his plate. “What does your bedroom look like?” He doesn’t know why he asked but he’s been curious as to what the inside of your bottle looks like since you appeared in his living room two days ago.

“Oh uhm…that’s kinda private.” Eddie can’t help but enjoy how your cheeks go a little pink as you politely tell him to fuck off, in your own way of course. “Maybe one day I’ll give you a tour.” You add, worried your previous answer was too rude.

“That would be cool…uhm so mashed potatoes and a peanut butter and jelly with a side of…Mac and cheese huh?” You grin as you put his plate in front of him and take a seat in the chair next to him.

“I also made apple pie and chocolate pudding for dessert.” Eddie can’t help but feel a sense of joy as he looks at you, it’s as if your emotions are so strong they overflow into whoever you’re near and right now you’re extremely happy. “Oh I’m sorry…let me just get that for you.” Eddie rolls his eyes as you reach over and begin cutting the crust off his sandwich.

“You don’t have to do that.” He mumbles but he knows it’s useless because you enjoy doing things like this and he for some odd reason wants to keep you happy so he just sneaks a look over at you and smiles when he sees the look of pure joy on your face all from cutting some crust off his sandwich.

[i-know-you-know-we-know-lee-know]

Enhypen maknae line reacts to their so falling asleep on them

Hi :D Im back

Uh

Thank you for your support

Enjoy this wierd ass looking heart i drew i guess?

💀

Hyung line :3

Warnings: grammar errors (commas illude me), fluff, me simping for sunno the entire time, spelling errors, not proofread, were all single pringles together, pronouns not specified, "their" used once

repost if you saw the original unfinished version that i accidentally posted because i know some of yall did💀

Sunno

Confused but happy

Ya know how he does that head tilt when he's confused

Yeah

He does that

🥺

Pouts his lips and just stares at you in confusion

He's just a little confused baby

There all babys tho

He'll still cuddle you

Just with a little more confusion than normal

Will play with your hair

Running his hands through it

(ू˃̣̣̣̣̣̣︿˂̣̣̣̣̣̣ ू)

There are no words to describe the feelings he makes you feel

He loves it when you feel comfortable enough to fall asleep on him without a word

Its like you two have your own secret language with no words

*so walks in the room*

*makes eye contact with him*

*falls asleep in his arms a few moments later*

I wish i could do that

He definitely looks forward to when you come home from a long day

Just so you can collapse onto him

I know i said Hoonie was my bias wrecker

But...

_(:3」∠)_

Oh well

Jungwon

🐱

Smol cat boi

Would not let you stay on his lap

Literally rolls over with you on top of him and lays on his side

Then he doesn't let you leave his arms

>:<

But have yall ever been in someones arms when there sleeping?

...

No?

Me neither

💀

I think it would be really hot

WaiT-

No

I meant temperature

I mean if were talking about Jungwon...

But just imagine being trapped against someones body

Unable to move

And overheating

Yeah you push him off you

But then you crawl on top of him

Because you cant fall asleep without him

And you want to make him suffer the way be made you suffer-

Jk

...

Anyways you fall asleep

Together

Like two peas in a pod

And you wake up sideways cuddled into him again

Because he woke up with you on top of him and pushed you off

And then you ended up in the same position you were im before

That sounded really wrong-

Im gonna stop now

Before i make any other wierd jokes

Ni-ki

Well he says he hates it

"says"

Because really who can resist a sleepy person when all they want is to sleep on you?

Nobody

Except him

Or at least he tries

But he still lets you fall asleep on him without complaining

Suspicious  ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° 

As soon as he double checks that your asleep he starts hugging you

Because he cant show weakness when your awake

No no

Because then he would be caught

✨simping✨

For you

And that's not allowed

According to him

Definitely accidentally wakes you up

But you don't tell him

Because you just want soft riki

Who desent

Seriously when he's no serious or tensed up and actually acting like a maknae it makes my heart melt 🥰

You listen to him as he hums you a little song

Thinking your still asleep

Eventually you really do fall back asleep

And he probably falls asleep too

The two of you are another victim to the hyung photos

They will take them just to embarrass you istg

Not even to say how cute you are together

No-

"look how wierd their face looks😀"

It was definitely Sunghoon

Getting back at him for taking sleeping pictures of him sleeping