#BLs prior to 2018

[absolutebl]

Hiii, I'm glad the ask box is open!

Idk if you already did a rec list on this, but can you recommend me old bls, like 90/2000s? I watched Seven days movies and its really good

Oh yay! Seven Days is the best. Actually, I have never done this. Here's a list of...

10+ BL's rated 7/10 or higher that aired prior to 2018

Just Friends?

Korea 2009 Gaga

This is Korea's first (kinda) upbeat version of a BL featuring already established boyfriends, one of whom is on military leave, trying to decide on coming out, family life, and the future. All of these are themes Korea will pretty much never tackle again, retreating as they would to their bubble. But what a fun little offering this little show was and is to this day. You should watch it.

Love Sick & Love Sick 2

Thai 2014 YouTube

This is one of those BLs that owes almost nothing to yaoi, although it started a number of tropes that are now endemic to Thai BL. What it is, instead, is a well scripted story of bisexual self-discovery and the inherent chaos of loving someone of the same gender for the first time, all wrapped up in hormones, existing relationships, and communication issues. It is high school queer angst at its messiest. Nothing is going to be easy for these boys because queer isn’t easy but also because life isn’t easy… welcome to adulthood sweethearts.

I'm actually considering a rewatch of these beginning of 2024 in honor of the 10 year anniversary if anyone wants to join.

Seven Days

Japan 2015 grey

The asker already mentioned it but still, never doubt my ability to recommend this show. One of the best live action yaois ever made, with perfectly structured angst, fantastic characters and acting, and no problematic tropes (rare in Japanese BL). The leads have excellent chemistry although it’s low heat there’s still some really cute mutual kisses.

Addicted: Heroin

China 2016 Viki

When Chinese BL was good it was very dirty good and when it was bad it was censored. This is the model for that statement: rich kid falls madly for the genius poor kid in his class, starts an aggressive pursuit, includes kidnapping for love, obsession, stepbrother trope, plus some cheating. I love this BL because of what I could have been. Just stop watching it after The Sex Scene. Okay?

SOTUS & SOTUS S & SOTUS Our Skyy

Thai 2016 YouTube

This is the BL that launched a hundred BLs. No literally, it was SOTUS’s international success that pretty much built the Thai BL industry into the juggernaut it is today. People have baggage around SOTUS, I have nostalgia. Trigger warning on bully hazing. Review and discussion here.

Make it Right 1 & 2 (but not Beach)

Thai 2016 YouTube (Cheewin warning)

What to say about this show, the origin of the Thai BL pulps? It’s objectively terrible, and not just the leads but the side couple too - yet I love it. I tend to call myself the “world’s foremost Make It Right apologist.” I recognize the issues but I find it utterly charming, especially Tee’s utter devotion to Fuse the baby bi disaster.

Long Time No See

Korea 2017 Gaga

Catfishing assassins on either side of a turf war who fall in love not knowing they are on opposite sides. Or do they? Good fight sequences, mature characters, high heat, very suspenseful, AND an HEA. If you like KinnPorsche or Kiseki you will LOVE this one.

HIStory Obsessed

Taiwan 2017 Viki

I weirdly love this but you should know what you are in for: that title. It has a stalking theme meets fated mates and quite a bit of dubious consent. Uke obsessed with seme to the point of losing himself and his identity dies after being rejected, and then has a chance to reboot his life. He decides to save himself by never falling in love. But destiny is a bitch, and this time the seme becomes obsessed with him. This one owes a lot to dark Chinese and Japanese BL, but kind of corrects for the expected sad dead finale by ending happily and playing with a ton of BL tropes. The leads have good chemistry, it's higher heat and the first time Taiwan starts to push that, and VERY DRAMATIC.

Some Others you might consider

Candy and Kiss - Japan 2015

Silhouette of Your Voice (Hidamari ga Kikoeru) - Japan 2017

Red Balloon - Taiwan 2017

(source)

[firstkanaphans]

Hello Sarah sorry to bother you. I'm a new fan kinda but I'm done with watching all the firstkhao dramas (together and individual) but tbh I'm kinda lost on how I will get to know them better. I have no idea about their irl personalities that much. Maybe you can give a little introduction for me if it's not too much of a bother? Also like how they met and why are they doing so many projects together? And are they good friends irl too (my friend told me a lot of time pair actors don't really get along with each other which is why I got curious about their dynamic) Sorry if these questions are a bit dumb I'm altogether very new in bl fandoms so don't have a lot of ideas.

Oh, Anon. I don’t think you know what you’ve signed up for here. If you want a FK primer, I can give you a FK primer!

Both First and Khaotung started working for GMMTV back in 2018. I’m pretty sure talent agents simply slid into their DMs, so there was no formal audition process, but I could be wrong about that. They were both in university at the time. I’m not quite sure what they were doing that attracted the attention of the talent agents. I know First had been in at least one commercial prior, but I don’t believe Khaotung had done any acting. He had, however, had a picture go viral because he’s just so stinkin’ adorable. I think maybe this one? 

Or it could have been one of these…

Either way, they ended up in an acting workshop together right after they joined. Khaotung talks about how he didn’t like First at first because he was too friendly and talkative, but I think that must have only lasted for like a day because it was during this same workshop where he discovered that his heart beats to the sound of First’s name—“FirFirFir”—and yes, that is a real thing that he has admitted out loud on multiple occasions. They have been best friends ever since.

From there, the two of them began to act in individual projects—mostly BLs—and although I have no proof of this, I am entirely convinced that they were playing a long con to get themselves partnered together. They did way more fanservice before they were partnered than they do now. Feel free to watch this live from 2020 where they alternate between staring lovingly in each other's eyes and just outright flirting for an hour straight.

Look, they’re smart boys. They knew that their best path to success in this industry was to be in a fixed pair and they wanted that pair to be each other. How do I know? Because these two adorable idiots were showing up to events in matching outfits.

This picture was taken in January 2021 when Tonhon Chonlatee was actively airing! There's a picture from this same event of them with Podd, who Khao was paired with, and Podd looks like the odd man out.

They were finally paired together for The Eclipse in 2022 and spent the entire press tour either talking about how excited they were to finally work together or crying about the possibility that they might never be able to work together again. I would highly recommend you watch The Eclipse special episode if you haven’t already. In it, First talks about how there was one scene where Khao wasn’t supposed to cry but he kept crying anyway because First was crying and he cared about First so much. 

And speaking of crying, if you want to watch a compilation of FK crying about how much they love each other (and other things!), you can find that here.

One thing I would recommend if you want to get to know FK better is to watch a bit of Safehouse Season 4. It’s unscripted, so you’ll get a sense of their personalities, but First was also in an arm cast at the time, so you’ll get to watch Khao dote on him for seven days straight.

Oh and you have to watch this! If you ever see people talking about the voices in First’s head, that's why.

Obviously, we can never truly know what goes on behind closed doors for any of these BL couples, but I feel pretty confident in saying that FirstKhao are genuine besties. They literally do everything together. You can find a collection of some of their lovestagram pics here although there are so many more now. It never stops.

Actual things they have said to each other un-prompted:

First to Khao: I want to build a house with the same fences as you.

Khao to First: As you grow up, you will meet many new friends. Leave them and stay with me.

I’m wracking my brain for anything else that feels important for a new fan to know and am coming up blank, but I’m sure I’ll probably think of something right after I post this. They’re both just super sweet individuals who have never been involved in any controversy and I think what people love most about them is just how much they care about each other. They’ve got that whole platonic soulmate thing going on and we're all super jealous.

[tottymatsuno]

Just as a general tip, check out the op of any art prior to 2019. The porn ban of dec 2018 made a lot of the bls immediately migrate to twitter but 2016-2017 I honestly wouldnt even touch the art unless I personally knew that person. BLs out numbered us like 30:1 back then.

I know a lot of people weren’t in the fandom then, and ofc like you cant check the op of deactivated blogs (so dont sweat it) but always check out the OP prior to 2019. 9/10 they are a BL.

[bl-bam-beyond]

Motive Village & The 2 Moons Franchise.

Well 2 Moons was meant to be a 3 part series starring the same cast.

A BL Series Starring Itthipat Thanit aka GOD, Suradej Pinnirat aka BAS, Panuwat Kerdthongtavee aka COPTER, Warodom Khemmonta aka KIMMON, David Kreepolrerk aka TAE and Thanapon Jarujitranon aka TEE. They were set to play Phana, Wayo, Kit, Ming, Forth and Beam. FOR ALL 3 SEASONS.

The first Season Aired in 2017 and although it was critiqued it was a success. The cast gained instant acclaim.

Produced by Motive Village & CCDM. The former in 2018 claimed copyright issues with the latter.

While this was being "sorted out" God pulled out of making 2 Moons 2 due to other projects scheduled far in advance however Motive Village released this statement

Some fans immediately took issue claiming God was homophobic and had no intention of completing the BL Series. That he had kiss scenes he didn't like removed or wiping his mouth after kiss scenes with love interest Bas (who played Wayo) but God's management took issue with this and Motive Village released this statement

Quick retraction to save face. But Motive Village already made the decision to replace the entire cast. They created a BOY BAND called SB FIVE which included the entire main cast except God. The band was pretty successful.

However Motive Village had already replaced the actors for 2 Moons 2 and then fired the remaining guys without prior knowledge.

Then came the new boys. Surprisingly, most fans were pleased with the new actors which were Benjamin Brasier aka BEN (replacing GOD) Teerapat Ruangritkul aka EARTH now DIN (replacing BAS) Archen Aydin aka JOONG (replacing KIMMON) Kornchid Boonsathitpakdee aka NINE (replacing COPTER) Naret Promphaopun aka PHOOM or PAVEL (replacing TAE) and WORANART RATTHANAPHAST aka DOME (replacing TEE)

2MOONS2 was a success. But more problems were on the horizon with 5 of the 6 Boys. Dome had independent management so he was not subject to Motive Village problems.

The problems with the 2 Moons 2 cast started with Din (formerly Earth) as he was allegedly facing sexual harassment from a much older man at the Top at the company. When Din rejected this man he was sidelined so Motive Village prepared to start another BOY BAND with the entire main cast called OXQ which excluded Din (EARTH) and Din's Fans called EARTHLINGS were miffed so Motive Village released this statement

Though Din was promised jobs he was basically sat out with no work. But was there to support the BOY BAND featuring what he called his BELOVED FRIENDS.

Behind the scenes people did release statements in support of Din such as 2MOONS2 director and creative consultant (THERE IS A GREAT YOUTUBE VIDEO from MOONCONSORT that is very well researched about this issue)

Motive Village wasn't done yet. But Din's situation was handled with a statement from Din himself dropping out of the much anticipated 2 MOONS 3

But more was to come. It was said Motive Village was in financial despair. There was talk of actors in support roles not being paid. And Ben and Phoom/Pavel were also sidelined as Motive Village partnership with a Chinese company for a reality survival sort of show but only JOONG NINE were involved while Ben and Pavel took TWITCH for online streaming plus Pavel had HALF SAVAGE (his clothing line) while Motive Village had no work for Pavel, Ben or Din. J9 were apparently paid for the Chinese Survival Show.

With 2 Seasons Aired with 2 Different Cast in 2017 & 2019 no one expected 2 Moons 3 to ever be made as finally the 2nd Cast were finished with their contract. But one more scandal before that involving Joong who said when asked if was gay he said I AM A MAN IN REAL LIFE (not gay) and many took offense. He later apologized and Motive Village released this statement

Joong after leaving Motive Village went to another company briefly before settling at GMMTV.

So many fans said they would not support 2 Moons The Ambassador due to Motive Village mistreatment of the previous 2 Casts but on October 10, 2022

2MTA was released with an all new cast yet again but 2 Brand New Leads. But Phana, Wayo, Ming, Kit, Forth & Beam were all recast for a 3rd and Final Time. Reviews Are Mixed. Some Like It, Some Hate It and Some Refuse To Watch It.

@pose4photoml

[whitakermoos59]

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Petroleum engineers are professionals who specialize in the exploration, extraction, and manufacturing of oil and gas resources and in the mission to help discover oil and natural gas for the nation’s energy wants.

[mystlnewsonline]

Illinois Total Nonfarm Payroll Jobs Reach Record High

Illinois Total Nonfarm Payroll Jobs Reach Record High Unemployment Rate Stable in July (STL.News) The Illinois Department of Employment Security (IDES) announced recently that the unemployment rate was unchanged at 4.0 percent, remaining at the lowest level since the onset of the pandemic, while nonfarm payrolls increased by +11,200 in July, surpassing the pre-pandemic number of total nonfarm payrolls, based on preliminary data provided by the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS) and released by IDES.  The June revised unemployment rate was 4.0 percent, unchanged from the preliminary June unemployment rate.  The June monthly change in payrolls was revised from the preliminary report from +8,400 to +9,700 jobs.  The July unemployment rate and payroll jobs estimate reflect activity for the week, including the 12th. In July, the industry sectors with the largest over-the-month job gains included: Educational and Health Services (+6,400), Trade, Transportation and Utilities (+4,500), and Government (+1,900).  The industry sectors with monthly payroll job declines included: Professional and Business Services (-3,000), Other Services (-900), and Manufacturing (-500). “Illinois has experienced consecutive job growth every month this year, and today’s record-breaking total payroll jobs data is a clear indication of the marked level of strength in the labor market throughout the state,” said Deputy Governor Andy Manar.  “As the state continues to prioritize investments in workforce opportunities, IDES and its partners stand ready to provide the services needed for individuals to take advantage of the new and expanding job possibilities across Illinois.” “It’s clear that Illinois is making significant progress as we achieve this notable milestone for payroll jobs,” said DCEO Director Kristin Richards.  “Illinois is experiencing a banner year for economic development, and DCEO remains committed to providing resources and support to job seekers and job creators across the state.” The state’s unemployment rate was +0.5 percentage points higher than the national unemployment rate reported for July.  The national unemployment rate was 3.5 percent in July, down -0.1 percentage points from the previous month.  The Illinois unemployment rate was down -0.4 percentage points from a year ago when it was at 4.4 percent. Compared to a year ago, nonfarm payroll jobs increased by +89,700 jobs, with gains across most major industries.  The industry groups with the largest job increases included: Educational and Health Services (+42,500), Government (+27,200), and Leisure and Hospitality (+26,500).  Professional and Business Services (-12,400), Manufacturing (-10,200), and Information (-5,200) reported declines in payroll jobs.  In July, total nonfarm payrolls were up +1.5 percent over the year in Illinois and up +2.2 percent in the nation. 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[knifeselect13]

The Greatest Guide To Stress - Mental Health Foundation

The smart Trick of Toxic Stress - Center on the Developing Child at Harvard That Nobody is Discussing

Sorry something went incorrect with your membership Please, try again in a number of minutes Retry March 24, 2021 Program recommendations How stress affects your health. American Psychological Association. Accessed March 5, 2019. Tension and your health. U.S. Department of Health and Person Solutions. https://www. womenshealth.gov/ mental-health/good-mental-health/stress-and-your- health. Accessed Research It Here , 2019.

How Does Stress Affect Us?

Basics of Handling Stress. 4th ed. Burlington, Mass.: Jones & Bartlett Learning; 2017. Handle tension. Healthfinder. gov. http://healthfinder. gov/healthtopics/population/ men/mental-health-and- relationships/manage-stress. Accessed March 5, 2019. Seaward BL. Handling Stress: Concepts and Methods for Health and Wellness. 9th ed. Burlington, Mass.: Jones & Bartlett Learning; 2018. Indication of a cardiovascular disease. American Heart Association.

heart.org/en/health-topics/heart-attack/warning-signs-of-a-heart-attack#. Vs, ZCDtj2b, IU. Accessed March 5, 2019.

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Don't Throw Shade, Stress Can Be Positive Too! — Family Planning Services - Syracuse, NY

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Eustress is more most likely to be experienced in more short-lived situations, prior to planned shifts, or when an individual has power to affect or direct the outcome they desire. 2,3,4,6 Some examples of causes of eustress include: A promo at work An approaching event that a person is hosting Carrying out in a concert Having an infant Moving to a new city Impacts of Eustress & Distress Eustress and distress can both have distinct effect on an individual and their functioning.

[hautegirl07]

Why is the last Thai bl drama I watch of the year always my favorite drama of the whole year?????

[strazem]

I noticed that I’ve been getting blocked by a lot of Ososan artists lately and... At this point I’m sure it’s because of bad rumors and misinfo getting spread about me in discord servers. I’m going to put a lot of this under a readmore because I don’t want to clog people’s dashes with this, but I really want to clear the air here as I feel like there are a lot of things being left out of the narratives people are telling about me, and also the fact this is still happening and has been for four-five years, isolating me from a lot of the ososan community and hurting me in a very deep way...

Now, first off, I’m not here to say that over the past 4-5 years I wasn’t immature and childish. There were many times where I was, even to the point the behaviors could be seen as abusive or toxic even if that wasn’t the intention. I was in my early to mid 20s and had serious issues with oversharing my thoughts and feelings with people I really only knew casually, usually to the point of making them uncomfortable. I would also use all caps a lot, not really realizing the effect it had on people, making others feel like they were being shouted at. I would also act immaturely when I saw that other roleplay blogs were getting more attention than mine, even though the ones I had were for OCs, which meant that of course canon characters would get more traction.

Again, I was very young and not very socially developed. I am by no means trying to use my autism as an excuse, but rather an explanation.

Prior to getting into Ososan around 2016, I did not have any “real life” friends, that is, friends I knew in person. I did not know anyone my age and socializing was, and still is pretty limited to just my immediate family. Almost all of my interactions were online, and even that I struggled with. I had recently gotten out of an abusive relationship as well, and was just starting college. I did not think about how others felt enough and was too concerned with saying my piece and sharing my own opinions, making everything about me or about how I felt, and less about the other person. Again, this is something I’ve struggled with for most of my life as part of my ASD, but I’m still not excusing it by any means, especially considering the fact that other people ended up hurt.

I think the main issue was how immature and self-focused I was if I’m being honest, and how I would tend to make everything about me and how I felt and what I made.

My intentions were always good, that never changed. But as people have stated to me before, good intentions don’t mean anything if the outcome is bad. My immaturity really ended up hurting a lot of other people’s feelings and causing a lot of resentment, and I am by no means saying that anyone has to forgive me or be “ok” with me.

What I do wish though is that perhaps people who I have had struggles with in the past could refrain from spreading biased opinions of me to people who have never even met me. I understand wanting to support your friends, and I also understand that when someone you know tells you someone is “bad news”, it’s natural to take their word for it, especially if they only show screenshots of me at my lowest rather than when I was trying my absolute best to be a good friend, despite my immaturity.

However, I’ll be honest and say that I do think that this behavior in general seems counterproductive and perhaps even concerning... If there’s someone that upset me in my past, I don’t tell others or divulge about them to new people I meet unless I felt they did something actually illegal. I remember misinforming about someone in the ososan community based on false claims and I still feel guilty about it to this day, so I’ve also been guilty of this in the past. It’s also important to keep in mind that if someone is really making someone out to sound terrible or horrible that there is usually a bias clouding their perception. I've sat and reflected a lot on my own biases these past five years in therapy, and at the end of the day, I don’t think most people have bad intentions, at least not lonely kids in a small fandom. I think it’s a lot of miscommunication, lack of confrontation, and fear rather than any malicious intent.

Because if there’s one thing I know that I’m not, it’s a manipulator. I straight up do not have the social intelligence for that. I would all caps, I would get upset and leave chats and worry people, I would go on rants that people couldn’t talk me down from, or get too emotionally volatile, or put my own emotional issues onto other people by panicking and venting and putting on a scary and upsetting scene, but I never tried to manipulate anyone or turn anyone’s friends against them. The only two instances I can think of that even come close to me “warning” anyone about someone (and not for blm*tsu related reasons) happened in 2018 and 2019, well after all of this was (I assumed) done with. 

Most of my issues that people have gotten upset with me for was regarding my social immaturity, self-centeredness, altercations, public panic attacks, public mental breakdowns and a tendency to go off on emotional and heated rants, especially in public areas and in public chats. That’s why this thing about me being a manipulator seems misinformed to me, because I’ve never been great at DMing or talking to others one on one, I think anyone that’s known me will agree. Many of these altercations happened in public group chats.

I’m assuming that many of the bad rumors being spread about me are regarding my skype days back in 2016-2017, back before discord became the new norm for online chatting and servers and such, as well as a very specific “drama” that happened on anti-bl oso-twitter concerning people that had met in an osomatsu-san kin discord server (which I was not in or even knew about). 

Essentially, I befriended some of these people on twitter through people that had been in my second skype roleplay group (the first one I made was in 2016 I believe). I was unaware of any previous dramas or issues and was even unaware that said “person of interest” was even upset with me or thought I was toxic or bad. I had figured we had just stopped talking due to naturally drifting apart. Of course, in my young and naive mind, before understanding “social media etiquette” I went to go ask them why they had blocked me on twitter (I had started being active on twitter during that time.)

And of course, in my immaturity, was freaking out and panicking about having been blocked by someone I thought was a friend to people in my second roleplay group chat... As always... Ugh.. It wasn’t anything malicious though, just confusion and me being scared I had done something wrong.

One member in the roleplay group though, who I guess was a member of the osomatsu-san kin discord, started going off about said “person of interest”, claiming they had gotten their friend into a car accident and that they had groomed minors. Another person in the roleplay group felt the allegations were crazy and unfounded and left. Meanwhile, I was just lost as to what was even happening, I wasn’t aware these people were this connected or knew each other and admittedly, did a pretty poor job as a mod/admin that I didn’t stop the discussions sooner.

I have no idea if the claims were true or not, I imagine they were exaggerated due to bias, I have no idea, but then the same person who had made those claims showed me screenshots that “person of interest” sent to their mutual friend about me. How I was scary and toxic, that I had upset lots of people.. That they were panicking that I even contacted them on tumblr with a friendly “hello!”

Naturally, I responded with confusion. Again, my autism makes it very difficult for me to realize when people are upset or frustrated with me, especially over text. At the time, I couldn’t think of anything I had done to upset them and was very hurt and confused, as our last actual interaction had been seemingly positive. 

I did not try to turn anyone against them though. Here’s what actually happened: After being given this info, I also learned that there was a small discord group of the friend group that the person making the claims was from. I joined it hoping to learn more or get some sort of clarification only to find out that this entire group was very upset with “person of interest”. Like very upset. They made claims that this person lied, that this person liked to play victim as a way to manipulate others, that they had groomed two of the people in the group, that they had said unsettling things, that they would do strange and backhanded things ect. Again, I don’t know if these statements are true and I’m not trying to claim they are, I just know that this group of friends had been very upset with "person of interest” before I had even come into the picture. They were already planning on cutting them off!

I did not sway anyone or say anything, I was literally just there in the hopes of finding out if I’d done something wrong. 

Of course, this doesn’t at all excuse when I was still friends with “person of interest” and subjected them to my barrage of emotional baggage and panic attacks. I just want to make it clear that I never sent anyone after them or tried to turn their friends against them. In fact, I even tried to help them when they came to my twitter DMs asking me for help. I was already incredibly scared of pissing anyone off in general, and tried to keep things peaceful on both sides. When I asked the second roleplay group if they’d be okay with them rejoining, it was a unanimous “no”... I distinctly remember offering to still roleplay with them one on one and to make a new group that they could be in (and this was even after I had been shown the screenshots of them calling me toxic, which I still wasn’t holding against them!), but the offer was turned down.

I’ve noticed this very distinct pattern over the years of me running into a lot of issues due to miscommunication as well. It was very rare that people would express with me how they were feeling, or when they did, it was usually during one of my panic attacks, which were often bad enough that my brain would repress the memories of what happened during them the second they stopped, and it was rare that I would actually go back and read the things I said. People have had a very easy time going to others and complaining or venting about me to friends, but have had a very hard time actually telling me these complaints themselves, as themselves. I don’t really blame them, as we were all pretty young and given how much I freaked out publicly, it would make sense to be scared of how I might react. Not to mention there were probably things in their own pasts that made something like confrontation difficult. However, what I don’t understand is why this would still be happening five years later... I would assume by this point people would have moved on, especially regarding spats within fandoms.

I hold no ill will towards people in my past who’ve gotten upset with me, I do not hold grudges, and for the most part, if someone wants to cut contact with me, I just accept it and move on. But now that I’m noticing that these false claims are being spread around to other people in the fandom, people who weren’t even involved in these situations, blocking me based off of... Stuff they’ve heard about me... I felt a need to say something.

Honestly, my biggest wish or hope is that, given that it has been five or so years, that people who have never spoken to me or met me before maybe give me another chance? If I have personally hurt you, I don’t want you to feel the need to reach some sort of conclusion with me, or forgive me, or whatever...

But at the very least, perhaps people could be more careful when sharing personal issues we went through with other people, people who know very little about me and who I am and only know me through the lenses and narratives of people who felt slighted by me.

I have changed immensely over the past five years, more than I can even describe. I am not the same person mentally that I was, I have had therapy, I have had help, I have reflected, I have become more sensitive to other people’s thoughts and feelings. I even managed to help a friend of mine get therapy! I was not perfect, I behaved irrationally, but I do think it’s important to drive home the fact that it has been a few years and that I’ve made a lot of progress and that as I’m nearing 30, I have mentally matured quite a bit.

Again, no one from my past has to forgive me, I am not here to dictate how people should feel about me. I am just here to try to share my own side seeing as how I am unable to join most ososan servers and communities nowadays, and thus have a harder time being able to get in contact with or reach others.

I’ve been dying to say something, but kept worrying that it would stir up negative feelings or memories for others, but it’s getting to a point now where I’ve felt so isolated and hated by the fandom for five whole years that I’ve actually started having thoughts of self-harm again for the first time in awhile. I’m not saying this to make anyone feel guilty, and I haven’t acted on the thoughts, I just need to be honest.

This sort of behavior on the internet; gossiping about others, spreading misinformation about others, using a position of influence within a fandom to keep someone from making friends in fandom spaces... Or maybe people don’t even realize how much their words can affect others? Especially if they’re well-liked and exist in a lot of spaces. I’m sure there are no actual bad intentions when people say these things or vent to their friends.

And while I explained that one specific incident in detail that was with a specific person, it is not the only issue I’ve gotten myself into over the years either. I simply spoke about that one as I am just guessing it’s the big reason a lot of this is still going on to this day. I behaved poorly enough in the past that separate groups of people have ended up mad at me, regardless of even knowing each other. I was incredibly troubled, dealing with the aftermath of an abusive relationship, overworked with my animation assignments, and incredibly clueless in social situations or trying to relate to others. Again, these aren’t excuses... But explanations. Mentally ill people are not well, that’s why it’s an illness. In 2016-2017, I was at the lowest of my low, and continued to be until around the Fall of 2019. I have also matured significantly since, and have been working with a far more effective therapist as of late 2018, which I think is why I had such a positive change by 2019, as well as finding wonderful and supportive friends who truly care about me.

I know this is getting really long, too long honestly, but I really needed to get this off my chest...

I’m trying to decide whether or not this will be one of my final posts on tumblr as a whole, as I don’t think I will be able to participate in enjoying ososan publicly with how isolated I’ve been over the years by various groups and people; I think by this point the reputation is too soured for me to be a part of the community. Again, probably not out of malice, but fear and resentment at how I’ve acted.

The fact that I’m seeing more than a few people in ososan fandom I’ve never really spoken to, or people I was mutuals with blocking me is enough I think for me to consider calling it quits for public enjoyment. The fandom is already very small, and the anti-bl side is even smaller, so everyone is pretty interconnected and rumors can spread very easily. There’s no way I can compete with that, especially if I’m barred from most servers anyways.

I’m still going to mull it over, but again, if you’ve never met me, or if you’ve only seen screenshots of me from 2016 while panicking or allcapsing or at my worst... All I can really do is hope that maybe you’ll be able to see past these things and consider giving me a chance. 

As for the people I genuinely did hurt, I know I’ve said sorry many times now, even on my old blog Nutastic which I abandoned for similar reasons, but I don’t know how else or how better to prove how genuinely sorry I am... Because the proof of regret is in changing and becoming a better person, and there’s not much chance to see if I have or haven’t if I’ve been cut off.

No one has to forgive me, but perhaps at least entertain the idea I might’ve changed over the course of five years, and that telling people how I was back then instead of who I am now seems a bit unfair. Again, I suppose I dug my own grave by behaving like that in the first place, but I always try to show empathy even to people who wronged me at a low place in their lives, unless they were incredibly abusive and cruel.

At the end of the day, we’re all just people trying to enjoy a show about wacky sextuplets, and I don’t think anyone actually has any ill-will in their hearts, or has it in them to be “bad”, specifically on the anti-bl side. I don’t hold grudges, there’s no one that I currently have blocked unless they are a bl or a man that made me uncomfortable. My DMs are always open, as is my askbox.

Feel free to ask me anything or confront me about anything, though admittedly, doing so through anon makes it hard for me to reply as I don’t want to post anything potentially upsetting publicly.

And I will try to come to a decision about whether or not to pull a Jenna Marbles and leave social media for good out of regret and declining mental health. I will most likely make a post about it when I’m feeling more capable.

Thank you so much for reading, and I hope your year is going good so far despite... Well, everything

[talkingbl]

Favorite Tropes & Genres in BL media (from the BLs I've seen)

VERY LIGHT SPOILERS.

As for the spoiler warning above, the spoilers just pertain to the fact that each pair listed either becomes a couple in their story or their story falls into a certain genre. No story beats or other major plot points are discussed. Proceed with caution.

Now that that's out of the way, I've not really broached this subject before but I think it'd be fun to list some of my favorite BL tropes & genres with examples from and recommendations of the shows/stories that turned me onto these tropes. This list isn't exhaustive.

Friends-to-Lovers, Theory of Love (Thailand, 2019)

Khai and Third's story is nerve-racking at times but it's one of the most well-done BLs I've seen, by far (by Thai BL standards, at least). I think the fact that TOL turns the friends-to-lovers trope on its head is what makes it stand out amongst a sea of not so well done stories employing the trope. More than that, though, TOL is just an acting clinic on-screen. While at times campy and melodramatic, OffGun, White, and Mike hard carry with at times genius acting. (Shoutouts to Off in the scene pictured above!)

Enemies-to-Lovers, Kiss Me Again (Thailand, 2018)

Okay so KMA is NOT a BL. BUT, it is the prequel to a BL and includes one of GMMTV's most iconic BL couples, PeteKao. This enemies-to-lovers story is a fun one to say the least. Watching our couple come to terms with their feelings feels gratifying and deserved. The way they realize their feelings and express them displays a level of realism and (at times) maturity that doesn't really exist typically in BL. Highly recommend watching just PeteKao's cut on GMMTV's YouTube channel if you want to cut straight to the chase.

Xianxia, Mo Dao Zu Shi (China, 2018)

Prior to MDZS (my first? second? real BL experience), I had no clue what xianxia was or how it operated. I'm sure I've seen it before but didn't know how to classify it. To keep it simple (and maybe grossly over-simplify), xianxia is a genre of Chinese fantasy influenced by traditional Chinese customs and culture. It takes a historical period and adds fantastical elements such as "cultivation," which is akin to a combination of magic and religion from a Western perspective. MDZS takes this genre to interesting places with an enemies-to-lovers trope embedded in its main couple's (WangXian's) story. At its heart, MDZS is about a young man who gets a second chance at life and another who comes to terms with his love. Please read the novel, watch the manhua and watch the chibi version too for the optimal experience! Let me know if you find out which character is Jin Ling's uncle 😉.

Strangers-to-Lovers, Make It Right 2 (Thailand, 2017)

(I literally could not find a still from the show with Lukmo & Yok, so here's a picture of the actors together. Sorry!)

The story of Lukmo and Yok is the one that most MIR viewers hate lol. It's one that most don't understand, find unnecessary, and, frankly, skip. But honestly, I think it's one of the most entertaining strangers-to-lovers stories I've seen in Thai BL. Lukmo is the stereotypical lame, annoying teenage boy while Yok is one of the earliest examples of a well-written feminine gay character. Yok knows who he is and what he wants, he's just had trouble actually getting it. Lukmo on the other hand is clueless. When this pair comes together it might not be OffGun's acting clinic, PeteKao's [relative] realism, or WangXian's character growth, but it's mindless entertainment. After all, that's what we consume media for, right?

[taekooktimeline]

Could you please summarize the different stages they went through with the time frames including how they felt about each other at the time and what they’d told each other, and what the nature of their relationship was if you don’t mind?? (and also like big steps/milestones in their relationship like confessions, first kiss, first whatever). It just all seems kinda... muddled (which obviously it’s complicated by nature but if you could please help out i’d really appreciate it!! ty💗)

Sara & Kayla give different recaps. Sara will just do a minimal scheme while Kayla includes events. This is quite lengthy. Warning: It’s all opinion!

Sara:

— 2011-2013: Just (best) friends. Slow buildup of crushes.

— 2014: Just Friends. Boundary pushing coming specially from Tae.

— 2015: Still just friends, but they are basically “courting” each other and recognize they have a mutual attraction or - at the very least - curiosity. Possible kiss. There are moments of high tension.

—- 2016: They start an affair around May. Tae “breaks up” with Jk in August due to the unfavorable circumstances (they weren’t actual boyfriends). Jk seems upset but there is no direct confrontation. They are on good terms (meaning they don’t stop being friends). They start to mess around again during BS&T promotions until the end of Nov, which is when they stop again. BH starts cutting them out of content.

—- 2017: Tae regrets it & makes efforts to win Jk back (romantically). They both had started to hang out with friends outside of BTS which caused additional friction. Tae confesses to Jk at the start of March which is probably the first time there was an actual love confession between them. They start a serious relationship.

— 2018: Jk falls into a slump at the very beginning of the year (probs having to do with fame, identity, restrictions, etc) which causes Tae to suffer as well. (The group as a whole was also having a hard time but we are focusing on TK). This can be considered a crisis but they resolved it and came out stronger out of it, both as individuals and as a couple. As a group too !

— 2019: closeting intensifies even more but funnily enough they drop big lgbtq hints. They mature as a couple. By the end of the year(?) they start living in different apartments when they aren’t promoting which causes them to spend less time together.

— 2020: they keep being stable as a couple. Tae goes through some struggles but they are ok. Closeting reaches its peak, their first contract expires & they stage a talk to be able to change the narrative & interact more freely in front of cameras while still being closeted. (Disclaimer: I personally don’t think they have had any type of official engagement, just that they wear couple rings to show commitment like koreans typically do).

————————-

Kayla: reminder that this is entirely opinion on the timeline of their relationship. This is a quick summary. The timeline goes into further detail. Again, you’re free to believe as you like.

2011- predebut; friends as evidenced by Tae saying in an interview he noticed Jk first + Jk bought Tae a shirt for him while in America; Jk has also said Tae brought him out of his shell

213- debut; close friends; possible attraction but not recognized yet; this can be deduced based on them singing to one another in Rookie Kings in ep 7, Tae saying “you’re beautiful” to Jk and not the girl in the “Beautiful” MV + when the members go over the VHope kiss in episode 8, Jk seems very uneasy and uncomfortable about it (prior to the kiss talk, Taekook were affectionate, linking hands and hugging, mimicking one another)

2014; close friends who have noticed the attraction each feels and begin pushing boundaries to see how the other will respond; an example would be festa 2014, when Tae says touching thighs is for pervs but then is fine with Jk doing so moments later; Tae is visibly aroused by Jk dancing in two different moments this year (April during “boy in luv” and Sept 16 when he bites his lips and gets heavy lidded); in April when BTS act out a skit of Jk falling in love, TK pretend to lean in for a kiss and neither expresses discomfort. Milestone - realizing the other doesn’t react negatively to flirting / boundary testing

2015: close friends continuing to push boundaries; suspicions by us (theorizing) of a first kiss due to Tae drawing attention to his lips in two selecas in January + Jk recommending a gay song “Memo”, in which he changed the lyrics to say he wants “one more”; 123 theory first comes into play as well as Jk starting to send messages through songs - in May he recommends a song by Eels and highlights “can’t help falling in love” + in the same month Tae and Hobi cover “hug me” and then Jk uploads a song “eat” which has the line about wanting to hug someone. In December he covers “paper hearts” and shortens the lyrics from the original by 3 seconds so “when there’s cameras and I can’t reach you” is at 1:23. He also releases “fools” half an hour before Tae’s birthday. It’s an LGBTQ song. He’s called Tae a fool before in a fan sign. In addition, there is a lot of sexual tension in 2015 - Notably, festa. In June, Tae suggestively plays with a mic and Jk puts a mic in his mouth. When BTS appear on Yaman, TK are the only ones to interlock hands + appear to share looks of complicity when the interviewer asks if the members ever touched each other. During tension escalator, both exhibit a lack of boundaries and show comfort in being in each other’s space in a way the other members don’t feel (see an in-depth analysis of the moment by BL expert Pam here - https://youtu.be/mu8K1KBcn_0). They’re still playful with dubsmash and a secret handshake. They also begin to be more aware of cameras. They’re visibly separated in November during the HHYH concert making and when a camera pans to them in December, Tae stops leaning his head on Jk’s shoulder. Milestone - in our opinion, a possible first kiss happened this year, but they remained close friends testing boundaries

2016- FWB; we believe this is when they began to be intimate, though they didn’t label it. They’re flirty in Jan when they discuss Jk being an adult / turning 20. There are suspicions Jan 26 is an anniversary due to Tae uploading “how am I supposed to live without you” on this day and jk responding the same day with “nothing like us”. They’re generally affectionate in clips, such as summer package in Dubai. Jk is distracted in BV1 til Tae shows up. Jimin claps at a heart with their name in it + TK cuddle one morning without barriers or displays of uncomfortableness. We believe the dynamics changed between BV1 and SMART based on the tension in SMART. Tae is shy and Jk looks like he won at life; both bump arms and share shy and happy glances. Taekook is also coined this year! Due to external stressors, and shakiness/uncertainty in what their relationship really is, in our opinion TK remain close friends but end it come autumn 2016. They may have reunited briefly, based on continuing to display affection and attraction to one another, but proceeded to end things again by the end of the year. Milestone - in our opinion, this is the year they became intimate; FWB/not a serious relationship

2017- they become an official couple this year. In the beginning of the year they display jealousy towards one another, and Tae is very extra in his actions to Jk (ex - GDA awards in Jan). We believe Tae was trying to win Jk back. By March 2017 they appear to reunite and enter a renewed honeymoon period, as can be seen by the private convo vlive in April, ILY signs in Chile, suspicious kissing sounds in Tae’s Brazil vlive and festa footsie + suggestive actions at that event. They are still battling through the rollercoaster of 2016, which is why in BV2 we see them be sweet (“you’re mine” “do you want to live here with me?” To jk singing “nothing like us” in the direction of Tae’s room while seeming to be melancholy). Jk sings “nothing like us” in an interview and Tae gets shy. They display general closeness, like in the Run ep filmed in Nov when Jk eats food that has fallen from Tae’s mouth. They’re overall touchy in American interviews and hold hands after the AMAs when they don’t believe cameras are on them. They also do their handshake on MAMA and don’t have space between them during the show. Milestone - became an official couple  

2018- all appears fine with them as a couple, though both struggle with disbandment talks as individuals and as a group. This year is when we see the cheek kisses and “am I your friend?”, as well as “look at me, just me” from Jk to Tae in a run episode. Namsan private date on 1/26. Tae also tells Jk his eyes are always on him and he loves him during his birthday message to him. “Taekook best unit” is said by Tae at a fan sign, further proof of them supporting their “ship”. They display consideration and support to each other, like in Run ep 52, when Jk offers to trade cards with Tae so Tae doesn’t have to go to the sauna with his skin condition, or when Jk comforts Tae about his mullet at a fan sign. They also flash the ILY sign to each to each other at the BBMAS + BV3 happens when Jk is visibly excited to room with Tae (dropping hints / members congratulate) and is distracted til he shows up. Concert nape kiss. Milestone - solid, secure couple

2019- TK continue to appear close without issues or breaks. They’re flirty and affectionate at fan signs. Jk gestures twice to Tae as his life partner in the Japanese bbq interview, while Tae flicks his chin and they play footsie. They display traditional marriage threads while at a concert in Busan and Tae says Busan has his heart. They give themselves away as roommates in the May vlive with Jin and Jimin. Tae mentions the LGBTQ movie “call me by your name” twice. Jk says “I’m still me” from the LGBTQ movie “Love, Simon” at Festa. Jk awards Tae the “I thought you’d be beyond my imagination” award. They’re flirty in the “Home” performance and affectionate during MAMA. Weverse comment in November has been debunked. Jk doesn’t acknowledge Tae’s birthday online but gives him an airport  nape kiss that day. ILY signs during the NYE vlive. Milestone - to me, it’s possible they talked about the future together since Jk confidently referred to Tae twice as his life partner in the Japanese bbq interview and Tae responded by flicking his chin affectionately when “family” was brought up + marriage threads + matching hanboks

2020: all seems fine, in fact, dynamics may have shifted to truly indicate some sort of promise as TK have gotten bolder - they both wear rings on their left ring finger at the Grammys, along with matching outfits, and Jk breaks the lineup to stand by Tae (again, rumored anniversary as this happened Jan 26); general closeness and affection can be seen in American interviews, dancing together on Fallon and during CNS (with JK flashing the ILY sign); they wear matching outfits during BBC Live; Jk continues to wear Tae’s rings throughout the year. Milestone- i believe they’ve made some sort of deeper promise to each other, hence why Jk wears the rings and their actions are generally loud.

Final reminder this is all opinion / theory. You’re entitled to believe as you like. This is our stance. 

[youmeandteddybears]

Happy New Year!

In 2018 I was a late bloomer getting into BL. I thought it wouldn't be a genre I'd enjoy. Once I found Junjou Romantica everything changed. I had to find where all the fans were! I made this Tumblr and lurked.

This year was about survival from my trauma from the prior year and the changes the pandemic brought to the globe. I was scared that I wasn't going to be happy ever again. Then once it was clear I was going to be okay, it became about reconnecting with myself. And oh man, did I rediscover my interests in a big way!

I put the JR/SiH fandom on my gratitude list pretty much daily now. I feel blessed to interact with some of the most talented, kind, and funny people who love what I love, even if it's different characters or aspects of it. I can't ever thank you enough everything. If you ever need anything let me know, I'm here for you. I can get pretty shy, but I'm working through it.

And thank you for liking my dumb shitposts and non-betaed fanfiction written at 3AM on Red Bull and gummy bears. I have many more ideas and BIG projects related to JR/SiH planned for the year, so I hope you'll enjoy them. 😊

I hope you have a wonderful new year!

With all of my love,

-Vera

P.S:

You can find my fanfics here:

[flowersintheattic254]

I go chills when the new article acknowledge that D/arren had to change the narrative about his heritage to stop people (i.e. his team) from calling him white. And i could not stop my mind from thinking that white passing is also a parallel for straight passing and the fact that one day D/arren will have to correct that narrative as well. Thoughts?

I’m actually fascinated that it seems a thing of RM to explore the duality that D encapsulates. He has done it with each of D’s role. G/lee with Bl/aine being straight passing and now we have HW where D is again white passing, but using his privilege to other advantage.

Back in 2018 there had been multiple damaging articles referring to D as white. Removing any hint of his Filipino heritage prior to D performing in a biracial role in ACS. D was actually forced to address this in a tweet to Vulture (see below), correcting how his team had misrepresented him.

He’s now able to further correct that narrative. Despite what his team promoted here we are with D playing a biracial Filipino role and ‘socio-economic advantage’ of someone ‘white passing’ who uses his privilege for the greater good of disadvantaged minorities with the same skills and talents.

To me and the article confirmed it he seems to be making amends to the Filipino community he upset because of those articles in his name.

Now add this ridiculous written articles from his team in relation to ‘no more gay roles’. But the fascinating element for me is that he corrected the white narrative. He was able to do that and there is a clear potential parallel here with being straight passing. White passing is synonomous with straight passing and both were dictated by his team. He just had the limited power to explicitly correct the white. Who’s to say he won’t correct the straight. Don’t forget HW is also telling lgbt stories. It’s talking about a range of oppression not just racial. It doesn’t matter what part of D’s character people focus on because you need look at the bigger picture of HW.

You know what gives me chills is that both D and C have created theses allegories in HW and ATOM that explore oppression in relation to lgbt themes, but do so in an optimistic hopeful way. C tells his story via magic. D using white. How smart are they?

He may not have the power to correct the straight narrative now, but at some point I’m hopeful anon..

[reviewsofthesky]

Love By Chance (2018)

Love By Chance (2018.) Not PG, Romance.

 Okay. The first thing I’m gonna talk about is a Thai BL drama called “Love By Chance”, based off a novel written by MAME called “My Accidental Love is You”.

Fair warning, this drama isn’t by any means PG, a fact you find out quite quickly in the first episode. The drama is set during university. There’s two universities, essentially “the rich people” and “the normal people”

The main couple is Ae and Pete, Pete is a sweet, rich boy who came out as gay in highschool, and was blackmailed for it, and is still being threatened by his ex who was using him to get money. It brings me mild joy that the ex’s name is Trump. Ae is a football (soccer) kid studying at the not rich university. They meet by coincidence, and Ae encourages Pete to come out to his mother so that Trump wouldn’t be able to blackmail him anymore. The coming out scene was really well done and almost brought me to tears. Ae and Pete become closer over time, and eventually fall for each other. Their development is overall very cute if hindered by Pete’s childhood friend Tin. Something I felt was a bit overdone in the drama was jealousy. Everyone was jealous of everyone. Pete was still insecure from the severe bullying he received in high school, so it makes sense that if Ae meets a girl, Pete would want to duck out and let them be happy together (another heart-wrenching scene and it was done really well) but I feel that jealousy was a bit overused and got boring by the end with the amount of times it was included in character arcs. A lot of the complaints about this drama are about the actors. Saint, Pete’s actor, isn’t known to be the best, and a lot of people don’t like the works he’s in. For me, as much as I feel like cringing on occasion, I still love the guy. In his later works like “Why R U” you can see an improvement in acting skills, so I really don’t think a few cringe moments could ruin a perfectly nice drama. Tin is part of the second couple, he’s a boy who’s grown up rich, and he doesn’t trust poor people. When he finds out Pete’s dating a guy who isn’t wealthy, he offers to be his boyfriend instead. In my opinion it was a platonic thing, Tin at the time didn’t think he’d ever fall in love, and just wanted to help his friend. The reason Tin doesn’t trust is because he thinks everyone can be persuaded with money and that people around him would betray him if given the right price. He doesn’t by any means want his best and only friend getting hurt again. Which is a fun time. Can is on Ae’s football (soccer) team, and supports the pair, so Tin and Can clash heads a lot. Tin fell in love first, and after developing a semblance of trust, most of the season is Tin flirting with a clueless Can. Can, on the other hand, doesn’t really know if he should hate or like Tin. Tin has been a thorn in his side for a while, and with how much Tin used to hate him, Can doesn’t think Tin’s affections are real enough to be pursued. This leads to a lot of conflict during the season. Overall, the show is really good for someone looking for some top of the line “class difference couples”, and for anyone loving a tsundere stereotype. There are alot of heated moments that can make people blush, and some of the cutest and most meaningful scenes come from Ae doing his best to protect Pete. Season 2 is coming out soon, and it’s going to focus more on Tin and Can as their relationship has yet to fully develop. I’d recommend if you are planning to watch season 2, watch TharnType first. It’s a prequel spinoff based on the same universe a couple years prior to the events of LBC. 

 Rating: 7/10. Average acting and repetitive plot. Overall, decent. 

Described in 3 words: Angst, smut, fluff.