#But that was my third attempt at drawing it so I got tired AND I NEED TO GO TO SLEEP- 😭

[whereismyhat5678]

I had a clear vision with this one.

I did NOT need to spend that much time on this BUT DAMN IT IT’S FUNNY-

Context: Peppino was annoying the fuck outta’ him and it got so bad he wanted to take him home.

He was done with his bullshit- 💀

[kining-the-evil]

Can i request a James Wilson x f!reader where they’re married and the reader takes the place of House in the episode where he gets shot.

Heartbeat

Summary: Nothing brings a fighting couple together like a life threatening event

Warnings: being shot, arguing between reader and Wilson, angst, house being a bitch, reader is House’s sister

“I really don’t know what you want y/n,” James mumbled through his hands. His desk was a mess, something that always drove you crazy. The entire time you’d known the man you went out of your way to clean it and eventually he got used to it, even poking fun at you when you did. Today would not include that sort of teasing.

“You know exactly what I want, you just don’t want to actually do it.” You argued back. This was the third time James had stayed at the hospital over night, except last night he didn’t stay here. He went to your brothers.

“I- I had work to get done-“

“Thats what you were at Greg’s?” You watched as his face morphed slightly. He knew you’d caught him in his lie.

“He told you?”

“No. I was tired of sleeping in an empty apartment so I went to see my brother. Your car was parked out front.” The silence made the room feel heavy, and your husband was looking everywhere but at you.

“I don’t… i didn’t mean…I was going to come home. But…I just ended up there,” he attempted to explain.

“Thats why you told me you wouldn’t be home before I went home?” He didnt answer, fully aware it was a rhetorical question. “Its nice to know we are no longer in the ‘honeymoon phase.’ How else was I ever going to know when you were going to start trying to make me ex wife number 4?”

“Thats a low blow.”

“No, its a low blow for others. For your wife, its a perfectly reasonable concern!” He finally pushed himself away from his desk to stand up, reacting to how your voice was raising.

“Please just, calm down for a moment.”

“I have been calm! How many times have I defended shit you do? How many times have I forgiven you!” You yelled at him. “You promised you would be better this time!”

James just stared at you. It could have been because he didn’t know what to say, or because you’d never yelled at him like this; but you didn’t really care.

“You know what James, if you want to be like this then you can stay at Greg’s house for a while. I don’t want to see you.”

You didnt wait for an answer this time, simply leaving his office in a huff. Your next stop was your brothers office so you could chew him out.

“Gregory House!” You yelled, throwing the door open. All three of his lackeys turned to look at you while Greg made a face.

“Full name, that cant be good.”

“Why the hell did you not tell me?”

“Tell you what?” you gave him a look, making him sigh. “I assume you just got done yelling at Wilson?”

“I told him he could stay with you for a while, seeing as you didn’t have an issue with it last time.” The other three doctors watched the two argue, unsure of what they should do. It felt wrong to watch, but they didnt want to draw attention to themselves by leaving either.

Before you could continue yelling at him, the door to the office opened and another man walked in.

“Are you Doctor House?”

“No, he is.” Greg pointed at Forman, not looking away from the obvious staring contest happening between the two of you.

“Im an old patient.”

“You can leave the gift basket on my desk-“ he stoped talking, eyes wide, making you turn to see what was happening. You didnt even see the gun before you felt a sharp pain in your neck, and then your abdomen. You felt yourself run into your brother as you stumbled backwards, and he quickly helped you to lay down.

He was talking to you, but the ringing in your ears was to loud to hear him. You brought your hand to your stomach, bringing it up slightly to see your hand covered in blood. You must have been shot.

You let your eyes slid shut for a moment, and when you opened them again you were laying on what felt like a bed and the ceiling was flying by. You caught a glimpse of Cuddy, and you could feel hands on both your neck and stomach. Your breathing was labored, and blood was stating to fill your mouth. You coughed, attempting to expel the liquid, and Cuddy glanced back down at you.

“Your going to be ok y/n.”

You nodded slowly, but the pain in your neck quickly put a stop to it. You let your eyes slip closed again, and when you opened them again a few doctors were surrounding you and you were no longer moving. In the corner of your eye you saw James, and you attempted to say something. Though you weren’t sure what. Instead, a mask was put over your face and the already fuzzy world got even fuzzier.

You attempted to reach out in James’s direction, but your arm felt to heavy. You let your eyes slip closed for a third time, knowing you wouldn’t open them again for a while.

•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•

Everything hurt. That was the only though you had as you woke up a bit. Every part of your body was soar, and your head felt like someone had been beating on it with a hammer. After a few moments of laying there, you opened your eyes slightly. Thankfully, the lights in the room were turned down making it slightly more bearable. A glance around the room told you you were alone.

You reached up, feeling around your body a bit. Your neck felt the worse, which made sense since there was multiple bandages and a draining tube sticking pit if the side. Your stomach also had bandages, and there was a small bit of blood on it.

“You look like shit.” You glanced up to see your brother leaning against the doorway.

“Funny,” you groaned. “How bad?”

“You got a bullet lodged in your neck and abdomen. They removed them, but you lost a lot of blood and you flatlined for two minutes.” You listened, calculating what that would mean. Two minutes without air could cause brain damage.

“He was trying to shoot me.” You glanced back at your brothers face, seeing an emotion that was rare for him. Guilt. “He had an std after cheating on his wife and I had to tell her. She ended up killing herself; he wanted to kill me. You got in the way.”

You weren’t sure what to say. One thing the two of you didnt have a lot of practice with was sharing emotional moments together. No mater what the emotion was. “It wasn’t your fault.”

“I know.”

It was silent for a few minutes after that. Neither of you really knowing where to go from there. “Where’s James?”

He smirked lightly at your question. “He snuck off to see his mistress, he’ll be so disappointed that you pulled through.”

“Im not in the mood Greg.”

“Relax. He should be back any second.” He leaned back to glance down the hall. “Speak of the devil.”

James pushed past his friend, slightly out of breath. “Is she ok-“ he stoped when he saw you awake. “Thank god.” He mumbled, a smile in his face.

“Hi,” you whispered, a smile of your own on your face.

“I’ll give you some space, but don’t go to crazy.” You couldn’t help but role your eyes at your brothers sarcasm, but he did leave the two of you alone.

“Im sorry.”

The words were out of his mouth before you even had a chance to think about saying something to him.

“What?”

He walked over, sitting in the chair next to your bed. He reached out taking a hold of your hand, careful of the iv in it. “I have been, awful the past few weeks. My own insecurities got the best of me, and because of that you’ve suffered. When Cameron got me, I immediately thought, ‘what if I lose her?’ When they told me you flatlined-“ he cut himself off with a shaky breath. You let go of his hand, reaching up to touch his face; whipping away a tear. “When they told me that, all I could think about was that the last moment I would have spent with you was arguing. Not say I love you, not seeing you smile; that last time I would have seen you was with you glaring at me.”

“James,” you whispered to the man. “I’m ok.”

“I know, but what if you weren’t?” He had tears running down his face, which told you just how upset he was. James took after your brother, his emotions being just as hard to read at times.

“Im sorry for yelling,” you apologized. “I’m just scared to be another one of your ex wife’s.”

“I messed up my other relationships, Im not doing it again.” He assured you. “And I will do anything to show you.”

“I just want honesty. Dont hide, or go running to my brother. Talk to me.”

“I will.” He promised, letting his head lean into your hand as he rubbed light circles in your wrist. He leaned down, intending to kiss you but you turned your head away.

“I can not possibly look kissable right now.”

“You Look beautiful.” He tried, but you shook your head.

“I have a tube in my neck draining a mix of blood and puss. I can promise you that’s not attractive.” He just smiled at your words, shaking his head.

“You could throw up blood on me and id still kiss you.”

“Liar.” He laughed at the look you have him to accompany the word.

“Ok, ok, that may be an exaggeration. But I still want a kiss.” That time you let him lean down and connect your lips. It wasn’t long, but it left the promise of more later.

“Oh come on, you can do more then that.” James exhaled on your face, making you chuckle as Greg walked in. “If you go a little further then I get $100 from Forman.”

“You could always not make bets on our person life,” James offered.

“But what’s the fun in that?” He pushed a few buttons on your iv, making your frown.

“What Are You Doing?”

“Uping your Morphine, dont tell cuddy.” He Held a finger up in a shushing motion.

“God, I love you,” you smiled. If you were going to be shot, you might as well feel good for the night.

“Now that you’ve done your little crying make up thing, you should go shower.” James started to argue, but Greg just cut him off. “You haven’t moved to two days. How am I going to make the $100 of you stink?”

“Ill be fine,” you assured your husband. He didnt say anything, but nodded and stood up. He placed a small kiss on your forehead before leaving the room. Greg watched him walk away before look back at you.

“Thank god you made up, he is the worst roommate.”

“Shut up before I throw something at you.”

[flamebringer0]

[Image ID: Sketches of an original character, numbered from one to ten. He is a Nightwing, a kind of dragon from the Wings of Fire series. Each sketch depicts him posed differently. In the first sketch, he is using his forelegs to hold a spear while using his back legs and wings to walk. In the second, he is looking at his tail through his forelegs. In the third, he is sitting on a deck chair. In the fourth, he is standing normally and displaying the undersides of his wings. In the fifth, he is flying. In the sixth, he is standing on his back legs and looks uncomfortable, like he's about to fall over. In the seventh, he is standing on his forelegs and looks even more uncomfortable. In the eighth, he is laying on his stomach, looking away from the camera. In the ninth, he is standing with his forelegs braced against some kind of barrier, looking over the top of it. In the tenth, he is sitting on his haunches looking away from the camera. /.End ID]

Sketching random poses for practice.

Part [1] [2]

Some commentary:

1. Dragons in WOF are often described as moving around while holding objects like spears and scrolls. This usually looks weird to me in the graphic novels, where they mostly end up doing a strange three-legged walk that I imagine would get tiring after a while. There's also a part in The Lost Heir where Anemone apparently walks around with a lance jammed in her armpit... foreleg-pit... whatever. My headcanon is that this three-legged walk doesn't really happen, and instead the way to walk while holding something is to either hold it with your wing, or (as shown here) walk with your wings and hold it with your forefeet. I think this idea might sound weird and therefore not occur to people because they think that the wing is so thin that it must be too flimsy to walk on, but I feel that if it's strong enough to carry a dragon in flight it must be strong enough for this. Maybe. It makes sense to me anyway.

2. Originally this was sort of inspired by the pose at 0:34 in this video (cw for violence). I wasn't really satisfied with how my attempt looked so I changed the head to be doing something else. I still like that pose though and I might try it again.

3. This was inspired by Spyro sleeping on the deck chair in the remake of Spyro 2. I don't know if they have deck chairs in Pyrrhia. My friend told me the chair is about to get impaled and i guess he's correct. Maybe it's made of a very thick fabric.

4. This is how dragons T-pose.

5. What do dragons do with their legs in flight? This question bedevils me. When I was creating my Minecraft skin (this) I changed how the legs are posed during the flight animation several times, and I'm still not sure it really looks right.

6. Before I got into WOF I mostly only drew anthro characters, so something I want to understand better is how to draw a character standing on two legs without making it look like they have a human skeleton. My headcanon is that dragons can learn to stand and even walk like this, but most don't. You can tell an expert from an amateur because an expert will stand all the way up onto their toes, whereas an amateur will keep their heels on the ground. I think the main students of this technique are circus performers. If you do this in public you will be stared at. The only tribe where a lot of dragons can do it is Rainwings, because they think it's funny. The only major non-Rainwing character who can do it is Qibli.

7. Standing on your forelegs isn't really considered harder than standing on your hind legs, but it is considered a more advanced technique because you're much more likely to snap your neck if you fall over.

8. It's really hard for me to draw a tail curling away from the camera like this. I don't exactly understand what I'm doing wrong. The scales look weirdly skewed to me, like a Playstation game where the polygons are touching the edge of the screen. This happens regularly but I haven't figured out what to do about it.

9. Standing on two legs is a lot easier if you brace the other two up against the wall.

10. Wings look silly here. Wings are the hardest part of these sketches to make look naturalistic I think, probably because I conceptualise dragon bodies as like ... a dog with wings, as opposed to a bat with forelegs. Hopefully if I keep doing this I will be able to develop a holistic understanding of the anatomy of a body plan that does not exist. That's my ambition, anyway.

[george-weasleys-girl]

Ahhh I’m tired of seeing people writing Fred as an aggressive dom. Isnt bad but i’m tired, so can i request a sub Fred?

Not hard, more like a needy Fred after a hard day working or the next morning after a hard day, the reader takes care of him at night and in the morning.... Well, you know✨

with the prompt "I can't focus with your damn hand in my, ah - ooh... " I’m leaving the shame to see you participating in the kinktober (if u cant let me know)

Ooh, I love this! Thank you for sending it in💕

On Your Knees

18+ only

Fred Weasley x fem!reader

Warnings: smut, cunninilingus, oral sex (male receiving), edging, intercourse

~•~

Fred Weasley co-owned Weasley Wizarding Wheezes, the most successful magical joke shop in recent history, with his twin George.

All day, every day, he was in charge. Making decisions, giving orders, and being responsible.

So, the last thing Fred wanted to do when he got home was be in charge. Especially on George's day off when he alone was responsible for keeping the shop running smoothly.

~•~

"I can't focus with your damn hand in my, ah - ooh..." Fred groaned as he attempted to finish up the last bit of paperwork for the evening.

"Good," Y/N mummered in his ear as she leaned over the back of his chair with her hand down his trousers, stroking his hardening cock. "You're down to just signing a few things anyway. She ran her thumb around his sensitive tip, sending shivers of pleasure down his spine before abruptly pulling away, illiciting a desperate whine from him.

"Finish up," Y/N ordered and sucked his precum from her fingers. "Then meet me in the apartment." With that she turned and waltzed out the door.

~•~

Less than fifteen minutes later, Fred stood naked before his fully clothed wife. A warm fire crackled in the fireplace, and a massive faux fur blanket lay nearby.

"On your knees," she commanded.

A small smile appeared on his face, and he did as he was told.

"You know what to do," she grinned.

"Yes," he said and began pushing up her dress. The scent of her cunt went straight to his throbbing cock. Y/N glanced down and smirked. "Mmm, you look so hot when you're oozing precum everywhere."

His cock twitched in response and he hurriedly pulled her panties down, helping her to step out of them. "Now, be a good boy and make me feel good," she purred. "Then I'll make you cum so hard people on the opposite end of Diagon Alley will need to light up a cigarette afterward."

Fred didn't have to be told twice, parting her folds, he went straight to work and licked the entirety of her pussy with one long stroke, before circling her swollen clit with his tongue.

"Oh fuck, that's so fucking good," Y/N moaned and threw head back. Happy with her praise, he shoved two fingers inside her while alternating between licking and sucking her sensitive nub. Her hands went straight to his hair, holding him in place as her legs began to shake.

"Yes, right there," she urged him on, her moans filling the room.

Fred felt her tighten around his fingers. He knew she was close and shoved a third finger in, angling them toward her g-spot. That's all it took to push her over the edge. He slid his free arm around her, holding her steady as she quivered and shook, while he happily lapped up every bit of her pleasure.

"You did so good, my good boy," Y/N smiled down at him. "Lie down now. It's time for your reward." Fred grinned and lay back on the blankets.

Y/N followed him down, hovering over him on her hands and knees. She kissed him long and deep. Then she proceeded to move down his body, kissing and licking, drawing soft moans from her husband's lips.

"Would you like me to suck your cock, sweet boy?" She asked, just inches away from his twitching member.

"Yes, please," he begged, bucking his hips up.

"You're so adorable when you're desperate," Y/N smirks and leans down to tease him, swirling her tongue around his sensitive tip.

"Oh fuck," he groaned and writhed under her. He uncontrollably thrust upward, pushing his cock deeper into her mouth. Y/N sat up immediately. "You know the rules. Be a good boy, and don't move," she said. "This will be your only warning."

Fred nods and stills himself. Y/N smiled and took him into her mouth again, slowly working her way down until he hit the back of her throat. A loud moan fell from his lips, but he didn't move. She began to work him, bobbing her head up and down, giving the tip a teasing swirl every time she reached the top. Her husband clawed at the blanket, his back arching as a series of groans and whimpers escaped his open mouth.

"I'm gonna cum," he grunted.

Y/N pulled off of him. "Not yet, you aren't."

"Please," he begged.

"Patience, my sweet boy," Y/N shook her head and began to stroke him. Excruciatingly slow at first."

"F-faster, please," he could barely get the words out.

Y/N ignored his pleas, continuing her slow pace. "You know, I can't decide whether I want to see how far you can spurt or if I want you to fill me up," she mused. "Do you have a preference?"

"N-no," he stuttered. "Just n-need to cum."

Without a word, she increased her pace, her free hand sliding down to cup his balls. "Oh God," Fred moaned and threw his head back.

Y/N smiled down at the beautiful sight. "So close, aren't you?"

By now, Fred had lost all ability to speak and just nodded his head vigorously.

"Too bad," she let his cock drop unceremoniously onto his stomach.

"D-did I do something wrong?" Fred whimpered.

"Not at all, sweet boy," she smiled. "You were perfect. A little too perfect, actually. And now I'm horny again." She positioned herself above his cock. "I want your cum to fill me up."

Fred didn't have time to answer before she slammed down, taking all of him inside her, all at once. This time she didn't hold back, fucking him hard and fast. Her moans matched his, as she watched his face contort in pleasure. She knew he wouldn't last long. But, that was ok. Neither would she.

Her pussy clenched around him. "Cum for me, baby," she ordered. With one long moan of raw ecstasy, he squeezed his eyes tight and emptied himself deep within her, the pulsing of his cock tipping her over the edge moments later.

Y/N collapsed beside him, and he shifted to lay his head on her breasts. "Feel better?" she asked, her voice still breathless.

"Beyond better," he smiled up at her. "I think the folks down the street are lighting up that cigarette now."

~•~

@milivanili99 @fancy-pantaloons @turvi @zvummyummy @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @georgie-weasley @nighttimemoonlover @jsjcue @wzrd-wheezes @fredweasleyyyyy @hufflepuffie @alexistonks @anvaaryn @samshifts @asuperconfusedgirl @superduckmilkshake @mysticsheepsoul @gemofthenight @1lellykins @junerprsh @sierraluvz @wolfkill16 @smallsweetvanillabean @costheticbabe @charmedfandomgal @hanne-montana @rhunew @greenapplegrass @lizzytrees @spididerman @Havenater1920 @jelloangela @whotfskai @netflix-addict @lunacurlclaw

[juliasgoodusername]

Ley Lines Map for All the Gansey-core Girlies

Have you ever wished there was an interactive map that not only graphs the ley lines described in TRC, but also has layers full of possible spiritual points, arranged in loose categories and sloppily curated by sheer force of mental illness?? Okay baby here you go:

FAQ under the cut 😘

Was this necessary?

Genuinely it was not. My investigations uncovered that Maggie Stiefvater does not really care about geography, nor does she remain consistent about the ley lines, so I can't even really say that it's book-accurate.

Example 1 - There are multiple understandings of ley lines. Some are circles, patterns, connect the dots, etc. but TRC goes with the definition of "perfectly straight" lines "that crisscross the globe" (The Raven Boys Chapter 2, Chapter 15). One of the big three lines connects Boston to St. Louis (The Raven Boys Chapter 22). And the main line also passes through Boston (see example #2)! But half of all the Pynch drama in Call Down the Hawk specifically blames Boston/Harvard for not being on the ley line. Hello?? It's on TWO of them!

Example 2 - Maggie makes it clear that the connection between D.C. and New York, which also connects to the UK and Pilot Mountain, is the main line that Glendower's squad traveled on (The Raven Boys Chapter 7, Chapter 22). The weird part is how after defining this line, all of Adam's ley line adventures place it directly along the Shenandoah National Park/Blue Ridge Mountains (Blue Lily, Lily Blue Chapter 2 + many other quotes I don't feel like looking up). There's no way to connect the DC-Pilot Mt line to Shenandoah, but I can totally see how Maggie Stiefvater would think it connects when looking at a flat map.

So yeah. It doesn't really matter, but thanks to my research we can CONFIRM that it doesn't really matter. You're welcome.

So why did you make this?

For fun...it wasn't exactly worth it. But by sharing it with y'all, hopefully no one else will make the same mistake.

What about line #3?

The third line never has specific connection points in the books so I basically made it up :) but I narrowed it down to 2 candidates, with my chosen line based on Ronan's mention of the "Pando thing" in Greywaren's epilogue.

How did you decide on/find points?

Honestly it was a lot of vibes. You can read in the description of the map how I started from certain resources, like all the stuff in the books, and other people's Google maps. My big discovery was realizing that UNESCO World Heritage Sites covered a lot of territory between history and nature, but before that I was literally googling things like "strange places Kentucky" and pouring through articles. If a place seemed weird and magical, I added it.

Yes this took forever. Easily 3x as long as the 300 Fox Way floorplan, if not longer.

Is this map complete?

I had other ideas for things I should add to it but I got tired, so nah.

You've put down everything from urban legends to alien sightings, but why don't I see many hauntings on the map?

Blatant author bias; I firmly don't believe in famously haunted houses! The vast majority of "haunted" places operate as tourist attractions, so if I took them at their word I'd have to also log Disney World for being the most magical place on earth, wouldn't I? Also Re: I got tired.

Can I copy this map / add to it / use it for reference?

Please please please please

I found a typo

I bet you did! I'm not even proof reading this post bestie.

[xxavengingangelxx]

Somewhere Only We Know 1/?

This is part of a series: Long Way From Home. Graves gets ahold of 141's translator and demands she give up information she knows about 141.

Graves still has Val in this continuation. This continuation includes the events of MW3 so 141 will find out Graves is alive and they will learn where Val has been this whole time ;) MW3 SPOILERS Thanks to @unicorngirly1 for talking ideas with me!

Taglist!

@bellgraves, @unicorngirly1, @lily-lily131313, @shepgurl. If you'd like to be added and/or if I left anyone off, please let me know!

Triggers/Warnings: Mentions of torture, dubious consent, brainwashing, mentions of suicide. More will be added as the story develops.

-

“Un-fucking-believable,”

You were across the dark room, not visible to the camera, but Soap’s voice drew your attention and your head snapped in that general direction.

You’d been given orders by Shepherd and Graves: you can be in the room but you were not to move, not to make a sound and certainly not to approach the camera. 141 still thought you were dead, remember?

Consequences for approaching that camera? A return to a room similar to that cold, terrifying room where you’d spent your first week with Shadow Company being tortured for information that you eventually gave up. That was all you needed to hear. You in no way, under no circumstances, wanted to go back there so you’d do what you were told. Besides, you’d been more tired than usual, not feeling like yourself, like you were on the verge of getting sick, so it’s not like you even had the energy to put up with that. You wouldn’t be able to mentally handle it, either.

You’d make a third attempt on your life if you were returned to that room. Of that you were sure.

“Soap!” You heard Graves respond. “Ya miss me?” Graves laughed coldly. “Well technically you did, didn’t you?”

“Laswell, if you’re tracking this,” Ghost’s voice interrupted, “let’s call in an airstrike.”

“Ghost that is not nice,” Graves chided, almost as if he was speaking to a toddler. It made you wonder how he would be around kids.

“And Val?” Soap demanded.

“Now her ya did kill, Johnny,” Graves sneered. “Shame. I liked having her around.”

“Go fohck yerself. What’re you up to?” Soap’s voice snapped at Graves.

“I’m up to doing my fuckin’ job, kid. Maybe you should try it sometime,” Graves shot back.

“My fucking job is to kill the enemy. Guess what you are,” Soap spat back.

“Let’s keep this professional, boys,” Shepherd interjected. “Cap’n let me pain you the bigger picture. You need Makarov in a pine box. I’ve got the nails.”

The rest of the conversation was faded out because that name, Makarov…Makarov scared the shit out of you. Graves had told you that Vladimir Makarov liked petite, little, innocent-looking things and that like they’d done before with other male targets they might use you to help draw him in or distract him. You were Shadow Company’s femme fatale after all. You’d drawn in men before.

But the idea terrified you. Makarov was a different kind of monster. A psychopath. What was stopping Makarov from taking you like Graves took you? And Makarov you knew would not be nearly as ‘nice’ as Graves had been. Makarov would haul you to Russia and torture you himself. And he would get off on it. Unlike Graves Makarov wouldn’t hesitate to use rape as a weapon.

“Val,” Graves’s voice drew you back to the present.

“Graves,” you responded, shaking your head of the chilling thoughts that had occupied your mind only seconds before.

“We gotta meet 141,”

You sighed. Got teary eyed. What if they took you from him? So you said something. “They’re gonna take me from you,” you sniffled.

“We’re gonna have a fucking problem if they do,” Graves snapped. “We’re not moving forward until I get you back if that happens. They think you’re dead, Val. Remember that.”

You sighed again. “They better. I’ll raise hell ‘till they give me back.”

“I know it sucks,” Graves conceded. “But this is moving quick. We need Makarov. The quicker it’s done, they quicker we never see any of ‘em again.”

Makarov. That name. It gave you chills. You had the worst feeling about him.

Graves then gave a series of commands: wear both vests (we don’t know if they’ll try to kill you), wear your mask, wear your combat goggles, wear a helmet, wear a uniform. Do anything you can to hide your identity. Do not come within an arm’s length of them. You’re going to have a sidearm, your rifle, and a knife. And it all else fails? Run.

You followed orders and got dressed exactly how you were told to in the morning. You were exhausted. You hadn’t been sleeping well and your body ached.

-

It had been decided to meet in an abandoned warehouse. No electricity so it was easy to sweep for bugs. That meant no heat. It was raining and the dropping temperatures promised snow. It was miserable but at least all the layers you were wearing kept you warm.

You could feel 141’s eyes penetrating you.

You tried to tell yourself it was because out of a group of men you were by far the smallest one. The only female, obviously.

Price, Laswell, Shepherd, and Graves were in a room sealed off from the rest of you. Shadows were in that same room protecting Graves and Shepherd. Graves had wanted you in the same room as him but that risked Price recognizing you since the room was so small. The meeting would be quick, Graves promised. You only hoped it wouldn’t be drawn out.

That left you in a large room with Soap, Gaz, and Ghost. You stayed as far away from them as possible. You had your rifle hanging from your shoulder. You had your sidearm ready to go. The only problem was there was no damn way you could shoot any of them. You only prayed they’d stay across the room.

You didn’t like this. In fact you hated it. Why couldn’t another Shadow have stayed with you? Actually no. That Shadow might shoot at 141 and the last thing you wanted was to have them hurt.

Soap met your gaze. You had a soft spot for Soap. You two had been close. A little more than close but that was a story for another day.

“What’s your name, lass?” Soap called out. “Didn’ know he had female Shadows.”

You didn’t answer. You were scared your voice would give you away. You just pointed at your tag: P-80.

“I can’t read that,” Soap replied. “You can’t talk or sometin?”

You shook your head no. Duh. Of course you could talk. You just chose not to. Your voice was a lot softer than any of these men’s. It stood out. And they’d recognize it for sure.

“Your mannerisms remind me o’ someone I was close to,” Soap added. “Real pretty lass. Had a lotta fun wit her. But smart as ‘ell. Dangerous, too.”

“That you, Val?” Ghost asked.

“L.t.,” Soap whined. “I was gettin’ there.”

“I think it is,” Gaz added.

You shook you head no again. Tears pricked your eyes. This was getting to be too much. You didn’t care that you’d been told to stay out of that briefing room. You wanted to be in the same room as Graves.

“I know that’s you, Val,” That person, Ghost, calling your name was like someone lighting a fire under your ass. Graves had conditioned you to RUN from them if he wasn’t close by. You shook your head before taking off running, following Grave’s orders.

You were so frazzled that a flight of stairs presented too much of a challenge for you and you tripped, hitting the landing hard and slamming into the wall sideways, your head hitting the wall with force. You had a helmet on thank God but the hit still rattled you. Voices were scrambled and everything got blurry for a few seconds. You were about to get up and keep running when someone grabbed you by your vest and dragged you back up the flight of stairs you’d just tripped over. You fought not to scream to be let go.

Ghost had grabbed you. You knew because he was the roughest one out of the group. Only because he was incredibly protective of his men. After dragging you back up the flight of stairs he released you onto the concrete landing.

You tried to get back up. You were shoved down.

“On your knees,” Ghost demanded. Rifle raised.

“Ghost,” Soap started. “Don’t—”

“I’ve got this, Johnny,” Ghost retorted.

You sighed and dropped to your knees with hands held out.

“Helmet,” Ghost demanded.

You unclasped your helmet and took it off.

“The goggles and the mask,” came the next command.

“Fuck,” you mumbled to yourself.

You complied and took both off, dropping them to the ground next to you.

“Hoooly shit,”

You recognized it as Soap’s voice.

You shook the bangs from your eyes and glanced up.

Gaz was not far behind and approached. And you couldn’t do this. You couldn’t. You decided long ago you would never go back to them. They’d either kill you or send you to a military prison for the rest of your life.

Worst of all, Graves had said, you’d never see him again. You knew for a damn fact you couldn’t handle being separated from Graves.

So you pulled your sidearm and put it against your head.

The effect was instant.

141 backed off. Ghost dropped his rifle, leaving it to hang off his shoulder.

Immediately.

“Back off,” you stood up slowly.

They were speechless.

“What happened to you?” Gaz asked, eyeing you with stunned, wide eyes.

“Nothing,” You responded.

“Val, we’re not leaving,” Soap stated simply, his hands in front of him to show he was not reaching for a weapon. “Put the gun down, Jesus Christ.”

You didn’t respond. You lowered the gun from your head. Little did they know you’d rather die than be separated from Graves. In your panic you didn’t notice Soap was no longer in front of you. You raised the gun in their direction.

Yet not one of them reached for their weapon. You wondered if it was because despite how much you had changed they could see it in your eyes that you couldn’t shoot any of them.

“Let me go,” you warned, taking small steps backwards. “I’ll call him and they’ll come running.” Your mind flashed to that first night in Las Almas when Graves had ordered you to call out to 141. You being your stupid self had refused. Now you were actually threatening to scream to get Graves’s attention.

Then.

Your worst nightmare.

Someone grabbed you from behind. He placed a heavy, calloused hand over your mouth preventing you from screaming, from calling out to Graves. His other hand gripped your right wrist on such a way that you dropped your weapon. Your gun dropped to the ground. Soap expertly kicked it away from you. You were then flat on the floor on your stomach, the sudden movement aggravating the ribs that had been broken several times over now. Your rifle was taken. Your knife was taken. You were about to say, “Fuck you, let me go.” But duct tape replaced the hand that had been on your mouth.

They were treating you exactly like Graves warned you they would. You screamed into the tape because what else could you do? You were flipped onto your back and you immediately starting swinging fists, kicking, trying to scratch, anything to get them away.

Soap clearly was overwhelmed because he just stared in horror and how hard you were fighting. For what? To go back to Graves? To go back to the man who had inflicted that cut on your face that had scarred?

“Thas’ enough ‘o that,” Ghost said lowly. You’d forgotten how big he was because when he stood over you, he terrified you. He looked like the grim reaper. Zipties went around your wrists after your arms were pulled in front of you. But not before you put up a hell of a fight. You tried to scratch but only got Ghost’s Kevlar and uniform. Zipties brought back bad memories.

“You swing at anyone again,” Graves knelt in front of you while a Shadow ziptied your hands in front of you. You were lying on the floor, beat halfway to unconsciousness by said Shadow. “I’m leaving you in those with a broken arm,”

“Fuck you, sadist,” you mumbled as you lost consciousness.

-

Price, Graves, Shepherd, and Laswell were still in that small room. Talking about what you had no idea. You tried to use your hands ziptied in front of you to break the window of the SUV they were dragging you to.

You struggled, tried to be dead weight. Your worst fear was coming true. You were being taken from Graves. And you couldn’t scream because they’d taped your mouth shut.

But then you got an idea. You got into that SUV willingly because you had a plan. They’d removed the tape from your mouth provided you promised them you wouldn’t scream. The skin on your face was still red, though. Just wait until Graves finds out what they did to you.

-

I feel like this isn't as good as Long Way From Home. :( Idk why! But please let me know what you think! If you have ideas, message me! I'm thinking of opening an ask box :D I wanted to post a longer chapter but character limits got me!

[kazesauce]

TWD:DD Rewatch Recap Ep 1

I'm rewatching the first season of TWD: Daryl Dixon to look for anything that stands out now that we know all the characters and how the season ends. The first episode has a lot, so this will be long. Strap in or scroll on.

Isabelle and Laurent

The series opens with a semiconscious Daryl floating on the life boat and hearing Judith say "You deserve a happy ending, too". We hear this again later when Daryl is waking up from having his burn treated. Laurent says these exact words to him the first time they meet. Knowing now that Isabelle made Laurent draw the picture of the man on the beach, I'm wondering if she overheard Daryl mumble those words in his sleep and told Laurent to say it.

At no point did it seem like a romance was being set up between Isabelle and Daryl. She tied him to a bed “for his own safety” and lied to him multiple times. She locked him out of Father Jean's office after lying about the radio being in working order, saying Daryl could use it when he was better. Daryl is in a nearly constant state of being battered and concussed, so he was in perfect shape to talk on a radio. Isabelle only went into the room when he was taking a bath because he fell asleep and nearly drowned himself. She was inspecting him and making note of his scars as an indication that he was experienced and strong. She got incredibly uncomfortable when Daryl called her out for her suicide scars because it's a remnant of her pre-nun life that she was trying to hide from him.

Isabelle was useful in this episode. She scared off the woman and her grandfather by firing a warning shot from her rifle, cauterized Daryl's burn and saved Daryl from Codron with the battleaxe Daryl used to save her earlier. I don't know why this Isabelle was immediately replaced by a woman that bragged about not being able to learn how to change a tire.

Codron

His entire crusade against Daryl is based on lies that woman told him. She killed Codron's brother and claimed Daryl tried to rob her and her grandfather when they were the ones that tried to rob Daryl. Granted, Daryl would have killed Codron's brother if she didn't intervene, but she was still the one that killed him.

Codron spent a third of his screen time in tears and was the recipient of Mother Superior's speech about how the souls of the wicked and the hungry can be redeemed. He was never going to stay a bad guy.

Genet

I couldn't pay attention to this scene for the life of me the first time I watched this episode. I can follow along now because I know who the important people are. Daryl single-handedly destroyed their experiments and nearly started a mutiny. This scene establishes that Genet prefers not to kill people that upset her. She seems to prefer psychological and physical torture based on future episodes.

Codron said he wanted to take Laurent and make him a soldier for Genet. That's a dark concept that was never revisited, thankfully.

General Observations and Parallels

Daryl told Isabelle “It's not my fight” when she was trying to convince him to stay in this episode. Daryl told Losang “Pouvoir. It isn't my fight.” in the final episode after Losang tried to convince Daryl to stay. Pouvoir des vivants is the slogan of The Cause, which The Union of Hope is warring with. It's the only French word Daryl has said the entire series and he said it to someone he knows is a native English speaker. That feels intentionally confrontational to me.

The Grandfather tried to convince Daryl to travel with them by referencing WWII and France and the US being allies, and Daryl was not swayed. Now we know why.

There were a couple references to Isabelle not always being a nun like showing the scars of her suicide attempt and her saying to Mother Superior that she wasn't always a believer.

The building with the burner walkers had “Pouvoir des vivants” spray-painted outside. Now we know those burner walkers are the result of experiments being conducted by Genet's group.

Walker Quinn can be seen in the full season trailer at the end of the episode. I guess they didn't care about spoiling that since the character hadn't been introduced yet.

Daryl took the knife with the knuckle guards from the armory at the abbey and kept up with it the entire season. There's no denying the similarity to Carol's signature knife, so I'm certain Daryl was thinking of Carol when he took it. The fact that Daryl kept up with it the entire season even though he lent it to other people and had it ripped away from him multiple times is a subtle nod to the unbreakable bond he shares with Carol.

Unanswered Question - What Happened to Father Jean?

The only question I have after watching this episode is what happened to Father Jean? He was around Daryl's age and his walker looked fairly fresh. No one says what happened to him or even directly says that he died. The nuns kept his walker locked away in the belief that souls of the wicked and the hungry can be redeemed. I have a theory that he took his own life. Isabelle says that the tube in the radio broke about a month ago and they haven't been able to replace it. Father Jean was marking locations on a map with radio frequencies and handles. Maybe after painstakingly searching the radio waves for years trying to find safe passage to The Nest, the radio breaking was the last straw for him. Isabelle said “hope fades slowly, then all at once.” She would know based on her own history. Maybe Isabelle was so desperate for Laurent to reach The Nest because they lost their priest to hopelessness and were starting to flounder. I don't know if we'll ever find out what happened to Father Jean, but I hope so.

[forever1kay]

i’ll help you if you let me - megumi fushiguro

Apart of the Natural Hair Chronicles series!

Summary: Megumi decides to put an end to your self isolation and feels his heart break when he sees you in the condition you were in.

Pairing: Megumi Fushiguro x black!reader (implied fem)

Warnings: Natural hair issues, Megumi made you cry twice, self isolation (it was completely voluntary), tears, insecure reader, Megumi may seem a little out of character here, mention of murder but like as a joke. Let me know if I forgot anything!

————————————————————

After canceling and rescheduling date night for the third time this week, Megumi knew something had to seriously be wrong. After all, you planned the majority of your dates with him. Why would you want to cancel something you planned?

He debated coming to check up on you, thinking about how you need your space and how he wants to avoid confrontation, but he felt everything would get even worse if he sat aside and did nothing. So with that, he put on his big boy draws and walked down the hall to your dorm.

He knocked multiple times, but each time all he got was a weak “go away!”

No opening the door then slamming it in his face, no happiness in your voice, it’s like you were there but only physically.

At this point, he was even more worried, so he went next door to ask Maki for her key.

(He still wasn’t sure why she got one and he didn’t, but he knew this wasn’t the time to dwell on it).

After pestering Maki for ten minutes to give him the key, he took the chance to just snatch it and run.

Thankfully, he was still alive after. But also, much to his dismay, he found you in your room sulking.

Yeah, I’ve definitely gotta get to the bottom of this.

He walks into your room and closes the door behind him, placing the key on your dresser then walking to your bed.

“Y/n.” He says, expecting you to reply. But you don’t. Instead you groan, raising your hand out of your comforter and using it to shoo him away.

He tries getting your attention a few more times but gets inevitably tired. Ignoring your whines, he pushes you to the other side of the bed and takes your previous place.

“Alright,” he starts, turning to look at you although you refuse to look at him. “What’s your problem?”

“My problem?” Your mumble almost incoherently, your voice muffled by the comforter.

“Yeah,” he says knowingly, “you’ve been sulking all week. No one has seen you.”

“I haven’t.” You reply, and although you attempt to sound strong, he can hear your voice starting to waver.

“Look,” he starts, “They’re all worried about you.”

He hears you sniffle and he corrects himself.

“We’re all worried about you.”

“You’re worried about me?” You ask, pulling your head out of the covers to a point where at least your eyes are visible to him.

“I’m always worried about you, angel.” He tells you, “even if I don’t say it often, I’ll always care.”

“You’re only being nice because I’m in my feelings.” You say, putting your head back down.

He doesn’t even try to deny. “You’re right.”

And when you sob after that fragment, he loses himself.

“But I’m still telling the truth!” He yells in a panic, “I’m always worried, but you know I wouldn’t tell you this if you weren’t sad! Please don’t make me feel worse about this than I already do!”

When you don’t stop crying, he takes matters into his own hands, pulling the cover from your body then pulling you up to lean on him.

He holds you and lets you cry into his neck, flinching slightly when he feels your snot hit the skin there. Either way, he doesn’t move you or himself.

When you stop crying, he cautiously moves you away from his neck, looking into your eyes.

“Are you okay?”

You give him a look.

His cheeks heat up. “Bad question, sorry,”

You both sit in silence for a few more minutes until you feel ready to speak.

“It wasn’t something you did,” you tell him. “It’s my hair.”

He frowns but continues to let you talk.

“It literally won’t cooperate with any style I try to do. It looks so awkward, it’s breaking off, it itches so bad. I don’t know what to do! I know it’s not a reason to cry, and I know it’s stupid but- ”

“Your feelings are valid and you can cry anytime you need to.” He cuts you off. “Whether that’s with me, with Maki, or alone. You’re only human, Y/n. But eventually, you’ll have to pick up where you left off. I know you don’t like anyone’s hands in your hair, but if you asked me I’d help. Nobara would help, Yuji would absolutely love to help, Maki would hate it but she’d do it for you. I’d give you my card for a hair appointment and even sit with you through it if you wanted me to. I know sometimes your hair pulls away from your mental health, but you’re not alone through any of it and I need you to know that.”

You start to cry again and his eyes widen. He only knows to pull you back into him again and he starts to rub your back.

“I love you!” You cry into his shirt, holding on tightly as if he’d immediately walk away if you let go.

“I love you too, pretty baby.” He says softly, kissing your bonnet since your forehead was buried into his shirt. “But if you come to your room and cut off contact with us for this long again, I’ll kill you.”

© forever1kay 2022 ,

[esperanzagalaxy]

 RQG requests #3, tumblr’s not letting me tag them, but spiraling-solarsystem-of-sadness very politely asked for barnes and carter, giving me the chance to finally settle my designs for them! which came with great timing, because there were some other requests that included them and i didn’t want to go guessing each time. so here’s my process for designing them!

  i already had some images on my mind based on the vibes they’ve given me since the first time i listened (early barnes especially), so polishing them was really fun. i’d wanted to Just Doodle for a long time and this was very nice and helpful. i love sharing sketches, and coloring them digitally makes for something really pleasing to share. carter evidently was much harder to nail down, the slippery fuck, but we got there. enjoy the B-team in all their glory!!

 ballpoint pen and fine brush pen on yellow paper, with digital colors.

 ID under the cut, it’s a long one!

[ID: a series of three pages of sketches of barnes and carter. they're drawn traditionally and colored digitally over cream paper. the first two pages are filled with tests and exploratory doodles done with ballpoint pen, while the third has drawings with their more adjusted designs, in fineliner.    the first page has unfinished attempts for barnes's face at the top left section. to the right of those is a doodle of season 1 barnes, shaded with light gray: he has a coat with a high collar, epaulettes and some military insignias, and uneven, straight black hair that goes to about his neck at the longest. there's quick lines signifying rain around him, and a hasty thought bubble that reads "llueve sobre la ciudad". in the center-left, is a cleaner sketch of that design. his coat is colored dark blue in the outside and red on the inside, with golden accents, his skin is pale brown, and his hair is the same black, uneven cut. he has a long face, a rounded jaw, a long, straight nose and narrowed brown eyes, as well as a faint three o' clock shadow. he looks tired. there is an almost identical, line only version of that portrait right next to it. a list to the right of that portrait reads, "-long face -long nose -narrow eyes, high up -thicker eyebrows -ok enough lips -clean shaven -big ol' coat". below it is written, "oh yeah that's him babey (dover)".   to the center right, filling up the space, is a sketchy height comparison between cel, barnes and carter, with cel being the tallest, barnes a little shorter, and carter somewhat shorter than barnes in turn. they're silhouette only, standing neutrally. below barnes' reads, "lean but not lanky, he just looks kinda built when compared to cel". below carter's reads "¿?". the bottom third of the first page is all carter. on the let are line-only attempts at his face, with disheveled short hair, a thin, crooked nose and a mustache. he's smiling in both of them. around the first one there's the notes "weasely man" and "but less einstein...". next to the second one, where he's smirking and looking to the side, it says, "that but less yassified?" and "glasses maybe?". a third attempt below those is shaded in light gray and has similar features, but has his hands clasped together and big, pleading eyes, and he's saying "no stealing?". last in the page, on the bottom right corner, is one last headshot of carter, shaded with light brown. he has the same disheveled hair but wavier and swept to one side messily. he's wearing a hat and small, rounded spectacles. he's rolling his eyes and saying, "it's the cops again...". the list below him reads, "-droopy eyes maybe? -thin nose yes -those ears -face shape? -rounded eyebrows".   the second page is mostly carter. the first drawing, on the top left, is a shaded copy of a photo of real life howard carter. he has an oval-shaped face, drooping cheeks, small eyes, a big, rounded nose, short-cropped black hair and a mustache. he's wearing a hat and a suit, and doesn't look anything like the design attempts. next to the study are the notes, "me cago que tiene los ojos de manuel", and "can't believe that this is howard 'THE CUUURSE!!' carter". occupying the right side are doodles of late 1800s-early 1900s explorer's gear, and one is of carter shrugging, with the clothes colored light tan. a note next to the figure says, "some scrawny bitch?". to the center-left and below it are two portraits of an adjusted carter design. the upper one is for his cairo aspect, and is similar to the photo copy, but with a smug face, a short, pointy black mustache, the thin nose, and black hair slicked to one side. he's wearing the exploring gear. the notes beside him say "sorry i'm keeping the other nose" and "oh yeah there he is". below that portrait is supposed to be a s4 portrait for comparison, the messy hair and a hand holding up a dagger are visible, but the face has been covered up with a cartoony snarling face. there's a speech bubble that says "this one came out ugly", and a note below that reads "omg i can't get the hair it's not einstein".   on the remaining space, there's two full body sketches of carter and barnes's outfits, plus another portrait of barnes below. the outfit sketches are faceless and only the clothes are colored. carter stands cockily with a hand to his hip and the other going to pick something from his belt. his outfit consists of a big, medium-length brown coat, a red vest, a light yellow button-up, a bowtie, dark gray trousers, and knee-high brown boots. he also has a belt diagonally across his chest and one around his hip from which smoke bombs and sheathed daggers hang, as well as a big backpack, atop of which is visible a bedroll and a hat. the notes to the left of him say "big chonky jacket sasha would cringe at", "oh yeah there he iiiis" and "post time skip". barnes's sketch has him standing heroic but neutral, with a hand on the handle of his sheathed sword, and looking away. he has his long, heavy blue coat, a shorter red jacket underneath, a white billowy shirt open down to the navel, black trousers, and lightly heeled knee-high brown boots. in the portrait below, also colored, he's wearing that same outfit and has the face previously designed, but with a bit of stubble and long hair, as well as his hat. he's looking off to the side, leaning slightly forward, hair whipping in the wind.   the third and final page has three drawings in total, in a "before and after" sort of comparison. on the upper half are two drawings simulating photos, side by side. the one on the left is barnes's, in his season 1 design. it's a bust where his head is hanging down slightly, his shoulders seem drooping and he looks tired. carter's, on the right, is as if he'd been caught red-handed, mid-lock picking. he's looking to the viewer over his right shoulder, tools in hand, with wide eyes, cartoony pursed lips and a bead of sweat around his cheekbone. he's in his season 3 design, explorer gear with brown hair swept to the side. both photos are colored in a faded, more brownish palette. below, is a more carefully drawn and colored picture of carter and barnes fist-bumping in their season 4 designs, from the waist up. carter is to the left, smiling at the viewer, with his left hand to his hip. the only new thing to his design is that his short hair is greying instead of brown, and it has a broad white streak by the middle. barnes is fist-bumping him back, on the right, smirking lightly at the viewer. there are cartoony sparkles around them and also around them reads, in blocky pink letters, "B-team glow-up". end ID]

[catinc]

$17 Bacon Dream

Going to the mall is one of my favorite activities. There's so much to do, like play the display games at the video game stores, buy funny gay pins and clothes from the emo stores, and pet the pets at the pet store.

That being said, I don't know how I got to this mall, and, in fact, I’m not even sure this is a mall I've ever been to before. At least from what I think was the entrance, it looked like I was in a night market. The only light in the place came from the various stores that were open which I think was supposed to be late. I don't remember any of the names, but if I did I don't think I could physically pronounce them. The entire place looked like an A.I. had tried to draw it, and as I took my first step “inside,” I didn't even see any escalators, even though the upstairs lights were on.

I wasn't hungry, but I remember deciding to head to the food court first, and I don't remember anything after I left either. Probably because I woke up. It took a Purgatory sentence to get there, but, like a starving hummingbird, I made it to a flower. Looking back, I should have been scared, but I remember walking up to the misplaces deli like it was a Quick Chicken. It was the most dimly lit store in the ‘mall,’ and the man working there looked like the bacon he sold came from his own belly, but I ordered anyway.

There were other people sitting at the counter that silently chuckled to themselves while I was doing this, but as soon as the deli clerk had gone behind those doors, they burst with laughter like an Atomic Bomb. Once they were done laughing, without giving me time to ask, they ridiculed me for having the gall to come here and order. They then went on to explain that all three of them had been waiting for much, much longer than it took to get here in the first place. The first one of them had even bothered to measure how long he had been there before the fat man started to joke with him.

With their tale, I decided to leave, though, it seemed that that was all I was allowed to do, was decide. There were no walls to keep me there that had been suddenly erected, invisible or otherwise. I still wasn’t hungry, despite the length of the path here being longer than the circumference of the sun. There was nothing physically holding me back from leaving, but I could not move my body to do so. The customers only laughed further at this.

The Deli man came back out, and I sat down. With nothing better to do, I attempted conversing with him. He was clearly under the same curse of boredom as I, even though, despite our lack of hunger, he should have been making our meals. I got to experience the comedy the First had described firsthand, and retorted with jokes of my own, none of which I remember.

After what felt longer than the trip here, the Second man got tired of the stand-up routine, and yelled at the bacon man for our food. The third man tried calming the second down, and the first suggested a game. I, the fourth, proposed the stakes, or steaks, if you will.

After a feeling I can only describe now as falling into a light sleep in a car, and being shook awake by a nearby train, it just so happened that I was in the middle of the game that I either forgot, or was never told the rules of. I remember thinking it was my turn only because everyone was staring at me with heavy expectation, but my own attention was taken up by the fact I had an unfamiliar card in my hand. I had many normal cards, such as the King, Queen, Jack and Joker, as well as select number cards, but in addition to those, I had a card that, for some reason, I knew was called ‘god,’ and it looked like one as well. I played the Jack I had in my hand, and, although there were both higher and lower cards in every suit, the money was passed to me, with a strange addition of quite a few $17 bills. Not only did the rules of the game confuse me, but so did the rules of this world.

After that round of cards, the Pig-Man shut the doors behind himself once more, and emerged holding a huge sack of delectable cubes. Once these cubes were dumped from the bag to the counter, the other customers shoved these cubes into bags they had not had before. Noticing I now had one, I did the same. We got up from our seats, and were finally allowed to leave the deli.

I walked a purgatory sentence back the direction I came from, none of the surroundings familiar, and had a panic attack at something I shouldn't have, given where I had just come from, and woke up.

Inform me if you notice any sepling or mistakes grammatical.

[incognito-lionbeast]

Series: Aotu Campus (凹凸学园)

Couple: Rez / Jedley (杰霆)

Note: Canon Divergent / headcanon! This pairing was originally a "what if" scenario that got a little out of hand. I only discovered much later that people actually pair Jedley with the other Lei brother... 😂😂😂

Anyway, I wanted to write something short & cute. So I did! And now I'm presenting it to y'all without context. :3c

—————————————

    A single blue hair nearly two-thirds his height in length. That alone was perhaps remarkable in some right, yet that wasn’t what gave Rez–whose eyes were still dark with an exhaustion that never really seemed to leave–pause. He admired the strand, plucked from his side as he sat upon the edge of his bed in an uneven slouch. It tickled. That was how he’d first noticed. Though now it was woven around his hand a few times in a fit of whimsical sentiment, brow knit and lips pursed, heavy with memories he’d still some trouble believing. Still, he clenched his fist, drawing it thoughtfully to his face. Close.

Jedley.

This was his.

    Though Rez’s bed was bare of all but himself, he wasn’t alone. Next to him, where there once laid blankets crisp and neat… their order was disturbed, disheveled somewhat despite a very kindly attempt to tuck them back in. It spoke fondly of a partner, once there yet awoken earlier–somehow–than even Rez was accustomed to. A novel concept. One Rez considered as his eyes slowly, involuntarily closed again; the ridge of his spine clearly visible as his posture decayed further and further. Thoughtful, tired. So tired. Yet, not unhappy, he mused, despite his rankled expression. Strange, wasn’t it. He’d forgotten what it was like to have someone.

    A warm hand pressed against Rez’s shoulder. Gentle, coaxing admiration and perhaps a bit of a laugh followed. Words. Someone was talking to him, but Rez had only the presence of mind to catch “–you’ll fall off that way, my dear friend.”

    “I’d apologize for shedding. Yet, it appears that you don’t mind..?” Jedley continued, settling next to his tentative partner. Always a shining beacon of warmth and light, the gardener was practically Rez’s opposite. Yet, Jedley was his now it seemed… the knightly man wanted him specifically. The stern, less charming younger brother. In his tired stupor, Rez gravitated toward that light, ignoring how the tips of his ears radiated another more embarrassing sort of warmth. He leaned against Jedley’s shoulder—rather, into his chest as Jedley moved to accommodate him.

    Hello there.

    “Good morning.” Rez’s reply was muffled yet to the point, surreptitiously untangling Jedley’s gift from his good hand and letting it slowly fall to their feet.

    “Ah yes, I’ve forgotten my manners. Good morning,” Jedley chuckled. “I trust that you slept well, then?”

     Carefully, as if not to disturb Rez’s delicate sensibilities, Jedley brushed dark violet bangs from equally dark, violet eyes, lingering softly against his temple and pinning the hair in place so that he might see all of Rez’s face–or, well, as much as he could under the circumstances. This did nothing to help Rez respond any faster. On the contrary, Jedley’s affectionate onslaught had done little more than distract Rez from the question entirely, stymying the childish urge to hide his face somewhere against Jedley’s considerable bosom. Well, it was childish, wasn’t it? Rez hadn’t felt so ridiculous since the day he’d been married all those years ago. A time long past. An ex-wife he was still trying to forget; though it was getting easier now.

    “Well enough,” Rez answered eventually. Awkwardly, he freed the arm trapped between them, wrapping it around Jedley’s waist and gripping his shirt–to anchor himself, to fuss with. Both. “Are you always this… amorous in the morning?”

    That wasn’t the word Rez was looking for. Well, it was close enough.

    “I fear that may be the case,” Jedley admitted, unable to even pretend that he was the least bit ashamed of it. Oh well. He’d waited long enough to have moments like this; so wasn’t he allowed to be a sentimental fool about it? At least occasionally. Any more frequently than that and he feared that Rez might spontaneously burst into flame. Ah, Rez never really had been very good at softer, more affectionate gestures, had he? Even so… he fondly traced the contours of Rez’s face, slowly working his way down those stark cheekbones and to his jaw.

     Jedley wouldn’t trade this man for the world.

    “Though, come now–” Jedley tilted Rez’s chin, pressing their foreheads together for one last tender display. “As much as I’d enjoy staying like this all morning, I convinced your two eldest children to behave long enough to help me prepare breakfast. It should be ready soon.”

[buruuhan]

スー

ハァー

I feel like I have not only one screw loose in my head, but lots of them.

I’ve attempted the experiments for my final paper for about two and a half past months and none of them worked. At all. But when I did the same with different object for my teammates, it worked. I wonder what kind of mistake I’ve done in the process because I DID BOTH OF THE TWO AND THEY’RE THE FUCKING SAME EXPERIMENT.

Second, I visited my relatives in my hometown with my family because it would be rude if I didn’t. Being asked by my parents about the final paper like three times, and since that I kept thinking anxiously about my paper. Finally, in the third time, I felt very uncomfortable due to all those experiment failures and snapped, but I felt suffocated afterwards as I realized I’d crossed the line.

Lastly, when I and my sister went back to home last Saturday, I planned to go out by myself for some air the next day. I made up an alibi that I was going to gather materials for the paper which I kinda did. It went smoothly at first until I trespassed the red light on the way and crashed another motorcycle. I got minor wounds and few bruises from that crash. This one was purely my fault, and I believed I have no right to complain over that so I tried my best to hide it from my sister. It’s not like the wounds are life-threatening.

And then the blank sensation kicked after I went home. I felt tired as fuck, my head felt blank, and overall I got an impression that I could barely feel anything in my body. Even when I went to sleep, I felt like my body was floating uncomfortably despite laying on my bed and I also heard cats fighting but for some reason I couldn’t get up. Hell, back then I was on the way home, I even had a malicious thought that I wouldn’t mind dye ink if it would make my family no longer feel troubled with my existence.

I planned to go to campus to continue the experiment on Monday, but I in the end I didn’t go because my body still aches. I’m afraid that the experiment will fail for the nth times and I’ll run out of media powder that actually belongs to my teacher which costs a large amount of money.

I also tried to draw something but I ended up getting an artblock too.

Fuck this. I don’t know anymore. I can’t think of anything anymore, hence the very first line.

[f4wri]

ABOUT ME (cus im bored andd busily forgot)!! VERY LONG CUS I YAP TOO MUCH:

• First Topic!- Facts and fixations..!

(even though I probably have small details to tell cus it’s hard to explain for me stuff and have tightly enclosed interests, learning, etc)

• stars and space..I enjoy to fully immerse myself in further biology aswell (science is all time for me) and learn by reading my science encyclopedia and watching videos of teachers demonstrating/dedicating this topic knowledgeable enough to know (ofc)for atleast a decade. It’s me and the online teachers against the world. Fight meh, (pls don’t, I ain’t intrigued enough for it)

• I love my little pony (if you couldn’t already tell) which has been easily going on for most of my life and never will stop (most lesbian show ever). Continuing on, I adore and know most of the episodes IF I can physically remember ( i DONT have good memory) , and rewatched each episode atleast twice..even when I’m busy. I would talk for hours on end and rant about it! Lol! ( I was born to watch this show ).

•MOSHI MONSTERsZZ, I have the encyclopedia and everything, I loved playing the game and trollling on there to scare everyone and wish I spent more time on it. I used to have figures of them and I personally also dreamt to become one of them as a kid! The series itself helped me interest into reading any kinds of silly stories too (LOVREE ITT). However, it was an on and off story, that’s why I didn’t spent so much. More obsessed now!

•Pokémon!! Gonna catch them alllll!, yes, I had the collections and when my dad brought me all them cards, i couldn’t help but pack them up read through trying to actually get them all! I would talk about it all day (if I ran out of ideas of mlp) running to school to interest others kids (most people were OPPS against this fr..) but that didn’t stop me from watching or playing!! :D Fixation since 2011-idk lol.

•Plants vs zombies..what a time. I remember how I kept this away from everyone, even my parents and uncle (mostly dad). Another one that’s been happening most of my life aswell. However, I got upset when they changed the game itself..I cried cus WTFFFF..they updated it to a basic level game and was no longer interested in it. I LOVE playing the old demo tho fr, best thing ever, just like everything else cus I die when change. I loved it since the DS version was out ( Jan 2011 ).

I have more but too much already..

Second topic!: ME!

I have multiple disabilities. In statement of including of ADHD, attempted Tism, scoliosis (mild/progressing),astigmatism, attempted asthma and breathing problem(s), binge eating disorder, body dysmorphia, eczema (less baffling), motion sickness, indigestion, insomnia, endometriosis (mild/ also progressive), anaemia and maladaptive dreamer.

Third Topic!: Films/Series and music taste..

My favourite films/series (surprised myself).. are Mad Max 1 and 2, Scorpion King, Sonic the Hedgehog 1 and 2 (fixation), FROM (series), Elf, Diary of the wimpy kid, Fast and furious (kinda tired of them lol), Casino Royale, Boisvert (series), Happy meat farms/ Jurassic World (analog horror) Karate Kid (film series), Fury, 1917. I have more but idc to tell!

MUSIC!!:

Nickelback, Fergie, Lapfox Trax, Skillet/ Skrillex, the killers, Rob zombie, PTV, Chiodos, Black eyed peas, three days G, RGTM, Disturbed, Billy idol and Queen.

Fourth Topic: EXTRA HOBBIES

I enjoy..

•English/ literature/storymaking

• Journalism/ diaries

• Drawing/ art

•Fashion and Jewellery

• Baking and cooking

•DIY (labour included so sometimes)

• physiotherapy

•Scripting/animating/editing/computing

•Gaming

•Swimming (sometimes)

[the-diary-of-red-beryl]

To my 18 year old self

Writer's note: this one's a little messy editorially and some statements I've chosen not to elaborate on this time round, but I think overall it gets my feelings across fairly okay.

I met my younger self today. 18 year old me, to be exact. 

It had been a while, since I don’t have a consistent way of getting in touch with her. But this particular encounter came about after eating lunch. 

I do this thing where I forget to eat because I don’t notice my early hunger cues, so then I get ravenously hungry, and then I really crave a huge, heavy meal (today it was dry spicy hotpot noodles). I’m usually sad after eating this meal, for all sorts of reasons I think, like the disappointment following eating to fill a void of emptiness or loneliness, the loneliness of eating a meal alone, coming back to reality after the distraction of hunger subsides, or even just the onset of tiredness from my body digesting the food (tired = sad). Because the act of eating is me trying to cheer myself up, usually I panic when my mood drops after eating. 

I decided not to panic this time. I let the sadness wash over me, and then it happened.

I felt like I was 18 again, emotionally (something to do with the amygdala, schemas, emotional memory, etc.). Now, my range of emotions as an 18 year old were quite tragic, ranging from complete despair to sickening anxiety at best (I would have been in between my second and third attempts within a year). Typically I would feel a pit in my stomach if I were to feel these emotions exactly as my younger self did (nonono make it stop not this again) because in the past I would’ve worried over if I could survive returning to that place, but it felt different this time because I understood that this time round it was me reconnecting with my younger self. I actually felt happy that I was feeling sad. It's like meeting an old friend, whom you haven't seen in a long time but think about a lot from time to time.

“I have so much to tell you.”

Truthfully, I don't feel very much about my current self. I feel mediocre, unaccomplished, barely functioning basic adult tasks and still overthink way too much over small interactions and being perceived. But today I felt that the 18 year old me who sees me now as my 23 year old self, five years on, sees me in complete awe.

Reality is, I clawed my way through the last half decade painfully, making it this far by the skin of my teeth. And I feel that I have so much further to go and so much more to work on myself to be okay and finally be at peace. Every day is still hard to get through, and I’m just so tired still. But that 18 year old girl who sees me now, she cries because it’s beyond her wildest imaginations what she thought she could have or would become in these years since. 

I finished my university degree in three years with good grades, and from a notoriously difficult major at that, with a 33% course completion rate, after barely managing to finish highschool. I moved out of home at 20, and have been financially self-sufficient ever since. I work a high-paying full time job now, which I got offered even before graduating from my degree. I even own my own place, decorated how I like.

I'm covered in tattoos, have boy hair, and I’m physically healthier than ever. I have clothes that I like to wear and make me feel like me when I wear them. I'm happier with how I look now, especially now that I'm medically transitioning (didn't expect that one did ya). She's absolutely obsessed with what I changed my name to, too.

I have a very loving kitten that gives me little kisses every day. I got around to doing judo again, and piano, and reading, and learning Japanese, bass guitar, drawing, origami, cross-stitching, baking; all the things I thought I'd never have the energy to do again. 

The past few years, I've been so disconnected from life just trying to make it through and do what I thought I needed to do, that I haven't felt that I was truly living. Dissociation is a mechanism that works, but that’s the cost that it comes with. I don't regret it because I was doing the best I could with what I had, but I recognise that it no longer serves me as well now that I've created a safer environment for myself. 

Depression is the death of self-expression.

So, what do I want to tell my 18 year old self?

You are enough. You are not too much, and you’re not too little. You are enough.

I’m sorry that no one was able to tell you that growing up, that no one was there for you even in the worst of times when you needed them most. That you had to worry about things no 18 year old had business worrying over, that life felt so terribly bleak that you didn’t even want to see adulthood.

Life isn’t ‘good’ yet where I am now, and it might never be. I still don’t feel ‘okay’, and I still feel disconnected when people ask ‘how are you?’ or ‘are you happy?’ because I’m terrible at lying and it always feels so inauthentic to give a non-answer and hide myself. I still dread tomorrow as I struggle to sleep, and I still wake up in panic, as I dread the day that unforgivingly comes towards me. But I don’t wake up violently crying and shaking anymore. I can fall asleep alone now, albeit not easily. And I still feel so, so desperately lonely.

But the air smells fresh and very real as it passes through my lungs and sets it on fire. I notice the subtle colours in the sky, morning, day and night, and the smell of trees and flowers as I pass by, the feel of sand or concrete as I walk the paths of my neighbourhood.

My house is mine and mine only, and within it I am safe. No one can threaten me at home anymore, and I can laze around in bed and sleep in as much as I like. Here, no one can make me feel terribly flawed for existing as I am, no one can make me feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders for things that I was never ever meant to be responsible for. I don’t have to engage with people that make me feel unsafe, not anymore. 

I sing now, so much, in the four walls of my home, and with so much heart that I cry. I pour my heart out in my writing, even when it’s not addressed to anyone in particular. I still don’t particularly know my personality or who I really am, but I no longer feel as strongly that I need to fit in with others. I’ve stopped trying so hard to make connections work with nice people, or even not so nice people, and listen more to what my heart really wants. I don’t bend backwards for others anymore, nor do I bend backwards to do things I ‘should’ be doing. I simply just try to hold space to let myself be me, to exist as I am, and let myself grow and change the way I want to. I let my existence express itself as it interacts with this world. 

The tea and coffee I brew smells good, tastes sweet and is warm to the touch. There is always food at home, or out, which I can always afford. I allow myself to eat, to nourish my body and allow it to do the things it does to keep me alive. I keep an abundance of fruits and snacks in my house, and I bake often to share. People’s eyes light up when I offer them my baked goods, and they tell me how good it tastes.

I don’t feel any less lonely, but lately I’ve noticed more complicated expressions from some people in my life when they look at me, albeit briefly. I have none that I consider myself close to, but these people sometimes look at me like they have so much to say that is too hard to put into words. Nothing bad, but if I had to translate that look, it’s akin to something like, ‘I can tell how much you’ve been through, and you’re so incredibly strong for facing it and getting through.’ I don’t feel any less lonely, but I feel that I am sharing space with real people now where our lives intersect, whether through work or life, and these people feel human. 

I still don’t have someone that I can easily rely on for big things or small things, someone I can feel safe and willingly open up to, and share my experiences of being alive with. But it’s not something that makes me want to die anymore. I can live without it, indefinitely. I know that I’ll be okay now even if that person never comes, even if I never feel ‘fine’. Because I live this life for my own sake, to find out who I am in all my aspects, and appreciate that as I discover more and more about myself as I go on living.

I’m still as lonely as ever, but I think you’d appreciate that I did meet someone I find special. Probably because he reminded me of you, either someone who you wanted to become, or someone who you would’ve needed and appreciated having in your life at the time. Someone who is mutually attracted to me, who spoke to me first because he really liked something about me. Who I find so cool and amazing in terms of hobbies, endeavours, emotionally and intellectually. A person to whom I’ve written as raw as I could to, who seems to hear what I say even if he doesn’t say much in return. Who tries his best to find the right words and emotional energy to make me feel seen and heard, even when things are hard. His words and efforts speak volumes. He’s not always around, but I don’t find myself doubting his intentions like you had with your people. I’m not sure if this connection will culminate into something more or exist for long, but regardless it’s something I’ve deeply appreciated having experienced, because I know it’s what you needed to hear about. And I can tell you that life was worth living thus far just to experience this connection. From your time when everyone you were surrounded by felt like nothing more than trees, I can tell you that it’s possible to feel this way for another human and for them to feel something deeper for you, because it’s happened. It was possible. 

I feel like all my efforts in the last five years were so that I could go back and tell my younger self, ‘hey, I'm sorry it took so long. I'm here for you now.’ I needed to become the kind of person my 18 year old self felt that she could trust, rely on and open up to. Mentally she's next to me now, albeit briefly, as I offer to hold her hand and lead her through the next phase of my life. I'm not perfect and I've a long way to go, but I'm more confident that I'm strong enough now to be able to take her with me, because I know that I will always rise again after a fall, no matter what other challenges life may throw at me. Sometimes she’ll feel like leaving again because it doesn’t feel safe, or it feels too hard, and that’s okay. It’s okay to go back to somewhere that feels safe and familiar, and I will hold space for her and when things feel okay again she can choose to come out once more because she will always have a seat at this table.

[blazecat86]

I hate this banner so much i hate this banner so much. Ive been trying to draw it since november of last year and each time i get so frustrated with it that i just draw something completely different instead. Banner 3 was the first to get finished then banner 1 and finally this one. Fuck this banner. His proportions arent right the composition is boring and theres literally less definition in the background than the first one. More than half of the fucking thing is just black. Even the logo colors look bad and the only reason im settling for this is because i physically cant make anything else. Ive Tried. Under the cut if you want but honestly just keep scrolling. Live a life without seeing this, it'll be better.

This was the first draft and even though it's more interesting in general, i hate the proportions/ posing. There's times where I draw from reference and it looks like their arm is breaking but That's How It Looks In Real Life. The only solution is to fake it so it looks right, or just scrap the pose (which i did)

Third attempt. He has a very square head yet I always draw it as a circle in the comic. It makes it difficult when I have to draw what he Actually looks like. Pose is boring, hands are nonexistent, face sucks. Now i'm just being mean to him.

Speaking of, I got Really Upset trying to get it right for the last time. The pose with his arms crossed is what I was going for, but I got sidetracked and realized my feelings of despair could translate onto Doc, so I embraced the moment and drew him being sad and also me being sad.

Ultimately the finished banner was the second attempt. I abandoned it before but I was tired of throwing myself at the wall. I settled for mediocrity so I can do better things later, which sucks but I think that's art.

[nikikomiso]

This account will be all about my O.R.A.S, Winters, Dynasty and PLAYER : Manipulative guardian.

Greetings, traveller ! Tis I, Misq the creator of up-coming series called : PLAYER and up-coming game like DYNASTY. These two didn't have trailer of some kind of offical stuff yet but I currently working on it right now !

{GET TO KNOW ME !}

Preferred name : Misq / Miso

Preffered pronouns : He/It/They but mostly any.

Nationally ? : 🇹🇭

Age ? : Atleast over 13.

Height ? : 170 - ish cm.

Favorite things to do ? : I usually roleplay in my free time or draw shit or like check to social or some sorts. But mostly reading smut fanfic-

Extra notes : I do take comms tho, I draw your oc for toyhouse invite codes and robux ! If you interested, DM me in discord ! Xi_Misq #6115

Oh and I curse a lot and uh my english confusing as shit so imaooo

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Question : What is PLAYER ?

PLAYER : Is more of like Undertale AT. This timeline happens when frisk reset many times and push the fun value to it's limit causing CHIKO, breaks out from the void. However, Frisk did not doing any genocide route and always do the pacific route.

After CHIKO break out, he quickly get frisk under his control, using her as a puppet to do whatever he want to. With this, Chara notices that she can't float around frisk for some reasons but instead she can only stays with flowey.

Chara then realize that, Frisk is not the same frisk she knows anymore and that's where the real problems starts. CHIKO appear infront of chara, of course he sees her and quickly offers her a deal.

Chara have no choices but to accept the deal, because it the only way to save Frisk from CHIKO's control but little did she knows. She already in CHIKO game of death.

And that's how PLAYER was born

Notes : In my AU, both frisk and chara are girls here.

Question : What is DYNASTY ?

DYNASTY : A world where it full of hates, greeds, rage and many other negative feelings. In this universe, This world got created by 4 gods.

Life

Death

Destiny

Rebrith

With the mighty power of 4 gods, they created EARTH. The EARTH is full of life and is a peaceful place for the organic life to live. But however, nothing last forever.

In 1289, Life found their love. The god have fall in love with a pitful humans, with this the three other fills with rage and disgusts. They decide that life does not deserved to be a god anymore.

So, Life got their head cut off right infront of their lover eyes. And so, The human heartbroken and got slaughter by Death after life.

Now, without Life, EARTH is chaos. All three must create more life each seconds while doing their own duties also.

But . . . After gaining the power of creating life and decide mortals fate. God of Destiny greeds grows. It slaughter Death and Rebirth, obtaining their power and control the 'HOLY LAND'

However, Rebirth still alive so they escaped and live quietly in the mystery woods. They not completely powerless and still have some left so they use their power to create a child to a family who desire to have a children in their house but unable to do so.

Now, without Life and Death, the world lose it balance and negativity quickly fills the peaceful world and turns it into chaotic land fills with unholy mortals.

Jess, the ancient bird who always want to kill destiny for making her life shit. So she start her journey and head to the HOLY LAND to slay down, god of Destiny. Also finding a girls to keep her enterained.

Question : What is O.R.A.S and Winters ?

O.R.A.S project : The project that under Green Delta Diamond and Omega Red Diamond.

Omega Red, who demands to have a powerful soldier who is fearless and willing to do anything for her own sake. So, she ask Delta green for help. She accept the offers and begin the experimentation.

But it fails for 64 times and Delta already grew tired so she bring out her private science to do the experiment and on their third attempt, they sucess.

They created the first four prototype by give them unique abilities for fighting only. But however, after the experimentation sucess, they found that the prototype don't have any gems right anymore. The prototype start mass-shatters and with that, the scientist must change their commands codes so they could be less-violent.

With this, they must train the prototype and that how overseer roles are very important to the ORAS, not only that they train prototypes but they are underlings also. Make sure to keep the prototype safe from the laws.

Winters : The old Beta White Diamond court gems group that's now working under Omega Red's commands. They are very important to the ORAS since they are supporter once the prototype are in battle.

And I guess that is ORAS and Winters.

Question : What if I want to know the story, lore and etc. ?

I will post arts, notes, some aesthetic log and diary shit to give yall hints of what would happens.

And some lore, backstories and etc. Too don't worries. 🤭🤭

That would be all ! Hope you all will join in the journey of mine and my ocs too !

Farewell.