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wingingitonwheels · 2 years

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Epilogue

I dedicate the last year to Mark, whom without his relentless and unwavering support, none of this would be possible. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

My gap year (by a 49 year old cycling adventurer)

“Look If you had One shot Or one opportunity To seize everything you ever wanted In one moment Would you capture it Or just let it slip?...

…

So here I go, is my shot Feet, fail me not, this may be the only opportunity that I got

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime”

Eminem

Saturday 20th August 0900 – Sennen Cove, Land’s End

Finally, 24 years after I’d first heard of any records from running from Land’s End to John O Groats, there I was, with Eminem playing in my head, “Make it count” tattooed on my brain and my mantra ready to play on demand “This is what I do – point to point”.

With the sun shining and as Dire Straits. Money for Nothing intro finished and Mark Knopfler started laying down his notes, Doug Gale the RRA official Time Keeper counted me down…”Three, two one – goooo!”. I was on my way…next stop, John O Groats!

This time last year, I had no inkling of what lay ahead of me for the next 12 months. I’d just started a senior position in “one of the big four” accountancy firms, having left a very secure job with one of the most successful software companies in the world. When I was approached about the job, something I described as “moving from comfortable slippers to a pair of trainers”, I was ready to take the risk, and prepared that if it didn’t work out for any reason, it wasn’t the end of the world. If you followed my blog from the beginning of 2022, you’ll know that the job didn’t work out, and after 2 months, I handed in my notice, worked a notice period of 3 months and on the day I finished, jumped on a plane to South America with an ever changing idea of where I would start and which direction I would head north. COVID still ruled the world and unpredictability was part of everyone’s daily life: Flexibility and acceptance was the key to success.

I’ve taken a good few month to write my final piece on what can be described as a gap year (actually 8.5 months but who’s counting?). My trip across the Americas finished nearly 3 months ago, and the summer has gone past in the blink of an eye.

Whilst away, people who were following commented “you won’t want to come home” and “this experience will change you forever”. On the first observation, I can honestly say, being home is great! Spontaneously, I tested out a short adventure, cycling from Alicante to home with less than 24 hours’ notice between conception and landing. From that short trip that ended up being just over a week, I learnt that this year, I’ve spent more than enough time in my own head as I found out, and by the time I’d reached France, having ridden quite a long way, and confronted with no accommodation options for the night and panache in a tiny town that cost 7 Euros, I was more than happy to cycle through the night to Bordeaux and get the next flight home, preferring not to spend another 3 days riding north into a furnace-style headwind, the likes of which I had plenty of experience in the Americas. Home is still definitely where the heart is.

The Americas experience has changed me forever on several levels. If I ever do write a book, I hope to be able to draw these out.

The question I’ve been asked more than any other is “What was your favourite place”. I’ve not been able to answer that question for so long, as there were so many incredible experiences, places and people. But with time, these three buckets have settled, and with that, Argentina has risen to the top for all three ingredients. Whilst I may not be able to pin it down to a specific point on a map, the richness of memories from Argentina stand out and make me happy more than any other collection of experiences. I recently watched “Race around the world” where couples (mother/son, husband/wife, brother/sister, uncle/nephew) were challenged to race from Mexico to Ushuaia with £3000 between them (which to me sounds more than adequate!). I found it interesting that the generosity and love of dogs by Argentinians was so ingrained in their ways, and so what I experienced is likely what anyone else would. And yet, I was warned of how dangerous Argentina was, endorsed by the World Crime Index (18 most dangerous at the time of landing). Yet all I experience was kindness and love. From this I draw the following:

The less you’ve got the more you give

Be brave enough to form your own opinion and challenge convention and opinion

99.9999% people are good – 0.0001% are not, and this is what hits the news

These points ring true for most of South America, but where I experienced hatred, towards Potosi, I still don’t think those people that found my presence unwanted were bad. I see them as troubled and unsupported, with no vision or hope of how to improve their own lives or the world they live in. I can see why they may resent me in their country. I don’t think I’d rush back there, but it was a valuable lesson to have been confronted with another country’s reality first hand.

Comparing my rides through South and North America is like comparing Neptune and Mars: Both roundish but that’s about it. Landing in Florida after Peru rammed home the stark contrast between wealth and apparent poverty. But strangely, I felt more connected to the people and culture in South America than I ever did in North America other than the friends I already knew. Throughout the ride from Fort Lauderdale to Vancouver, whilst the occasional kindness appeared in the offer of a lift or a free can of seltzer, most of society seemed to operate via insular bubbles, surrounded by aggression and intolerance, and no obvious community. Even though I never settled more than a day in all but 3 places, because most US infrastructure is widespread, even compared to the UK, because there is space, space divides connectedness and community. Or perhaps that is also due to the politics, where some people believe that it is only a matter of time before there is civil war, and the country’s states become all red or all blue and more like countries than states (which to me is how the states largely felt even this year). Supporting my observation of South America, what I saw in the US was “the more you have the less you give”. People were more likely to be suspicious of strangers, less likely to go out of their way. It sticks with me like a permanent scar that when I was blown hard off my bike by the wind in Idaho, two drivers going in opposite directions would have seen me on the flat and featureless plain, but neither stopped nor even slowed down.

There were many things I didn’t feel I could openly share my view on whilst riding North America, as I was a visitor and not a citizen, but I may also alienate many of the American audience that might be following my journey. The three most resounding cultural memories I have relate to guns, abortion and religion. Since returning, as a result of the mass shooting in Texas that took place in May, there’s been a gun amnesty in that state, something I had vocalised rather than written that I felt needed to happen as potentially the only way for the American citizens to “have a voice” where the government won’t act. In 2021, circa 20,000 Americans were killed by guns, with 673 mass shootings. I’m not an American, but my greatest wish is that somehow, they find a way forward to reduce these numbers in future. I find it shocking that many states overturned Roe vs Wade and the right to an abortion. During my trip, both anti-abortion and religion were thrust upon you visibly by huge billboards repeatedly and not restricted to the bible belt. Add in the divisive topic of Biden and Trump, and it’s easy to see why families and society find it impossible to talk openly to one another. And so, whilst I still loved the USA and arriving in Vancouver, where South America had a great depth and richness to the experiences where I felt like Ulysses in the Odyssey, North America taught me fortitude and solidified what was important to me.

Understand your emotional brain

Many of my friends are athletes, and it’s no coincidence that with this demographic, a good number of them endorse a book called “The Chimp Paradox” by Steve Peters. He knows a thing or two, being the Team Psychologist for Team Sky for many years, and no doubt many other accolades. I tried to listen to this book as an audiobook a few years ago when friends were talking about “put my chimp back in the box”. I struggled to listen to Prof Peters as he talked about everything he knows about the brain and how it works when it’s put under stress. At the time, about 7 years ago, I didn’t feel like I had a chimp. I was completely in control when it came to racing or challenges, and I didn’t feel I ever got to a sporting “breaking point”, where your brain is telling you that you can’t go harder, faster, hurt more or continue. Prior to that, I had one notable sporting failure in 2005, but most of the time when doing sport, I feel that I am still in control of the part of the brain called the amygdala, responsible for emotions and our reaction to stress, and this was put to the test on some notable occasions during the trip. When on my own, with no support, my logical brain rules my emotional brain. Notably, when I got caught out at 4200m in Bolivia in the middle of an electrical storm and sheltered between rocks, eventually moving before becoming hypothermic. Also notable was on discovering no accommodation in a sleepy Colorado town after 125 miles, and without prior knowledge or preparation to do so, riding into the night at altitude as the temperature dropped to 2 degrees, towards Colorado Springs on a desolate and potholed road. The decisions I made that night from 125 miles to 200 were all good and still astound me as I think back to them now. If strength comes from adversity, then these two supported by many others have changed me and made me stronger.

How do these highlighted incidences and the many others relate to the emotional brain? Well, the decision to attempt Land’s End to John O Groats in one go, a world record being secondary, wouldn’t have happened had I not been exposed to desperate situations. Those are lessons I learnt about myself before I arrived in Land’s End and helped me press the big green go button in 18th August. But I’m still learning about my emotional brain and more will come out about that later. It’s one thing when my back is up against the wall, and no one to bail you out and the odds are stacked against you – for me that’s when the fight appears. I can now identify my weakness and as of yesterday, I found my true limit, not the one my emotional brain decided. I can write quite a lot more about this now I feel I understand it better and can relate it to previous sporting success, but that’s maybe for another time.

Take risks – try not to fail, but if you do, treat failure as an opportunity to learn.

When you go for something big, it rarely feels like timing is perfect. Whether it’s changing jobs, going on adventure, ignoring convention and doing your own thing your way, taking on a challenge that is more likely to fail than to succeed. All you can do is mitigate risk as much as possible and turn up being as mentally and physically prepared as you possibly can. It’s easy to listen to “the noise” which can undermine your thinking. We’re all different, but I would rather have tried something and failed than to never have tried at all. It regularly feels like I’m the one who fails whilst all around me succeed at the challenge they have set themselves. I question now whether for some of these in the part of my brain won on those days, or as I’m sometimes reminded, the challenges I put myself up for are frequent and insanely challenging and sometimes I need to be reminded of how many times I’ve succeeded.

One of the very first memories of anything wise my mum imprinted on me, annoyingly at the time I was trying to sew (which I am completely 100% useless at), “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again”. When she said this to me, I was about 7 and I was trying to make a fancy dress costume for myself with my crappy eyesight as my aide. I doubt she thought I’d be putting this to use for all the challenges I put myself up for. I’m not sure whether she’d be laughing or crying now, but I’ve failed plenty, and I’m still learning! I think the biggest regret I might have would be to have wanted to do something but be too old to try. I might be too old to succeed at some point but until I’m fed up with failing, I’ll probably keep trying.

Don’t wait for the perfect timing because it will never happen

August 20th 09:00:15 – Land’s End

The odds are completely stacked against me – 4 key events marred the build up in the last two months when I’d once again made a decision in Salta that the E2E attempt was on)…

With my A team behind me, the wheels started turning. I put all the events of the last few months firmly away the day before (the less than perfect build up) and with Eminem in my head, reminded myself that the bike was perfect, I am the fittest and youngest I’ll ever be, and this was my one shot. And then ran into a Parkrun being run in the Land’s End car Park. After apologising but refusing to stop, I hurdled what would be the first of 5 road closures to take on the rest of Mainland Britain. Here I was, taking on a challenge that had a lower success rate than summiting Everest, and the 10th attempt in 19 years.

Never had I felt I had tapered so well, I pulled back my effort on every climb in the South West, and free-wheeled whilst gripping my bike against a hard crosswind on every descent. I’d given the crew instructions not to give me any time or distance checks, as these were noise and irrelevant. I was against the clock, and it was ticking. Feed stops would be every 3 hours, where practical, unless I flagged I needed something sooner. Heavy congestion after 40 miles through roadworks was anticipated, and although it slowed me down, I made it through without stopping. Two of the officials had anticipated heavy stationary traffic in many places due to it being Saturday, changeover day and holidays. Exeter was manageable and only one bottleneck south of Bristol, and finally more congestion on A38 were the only things to speak of that caused any concern. At 12 hours I had ridden 238 miles with 3,300m of climbing. Things were looking good!

Although I’d given instruction not to provide any time checks, one of the officials did north of Exeter, saying I was 58 minutes up on schedule. The reason being that with that information, you could either take the view of “Great! Aren’t I doing well?” or “Oh no, I have messed up”. Either way, the information provides the opportunity for the emotional brain to have a view. My logical brain was looking at two pieces of information. Although tested day after day, my heart rate monitor didn’t work, which was to guide my effort. When that didn’t work, I used my power output to guide me, and elapsed time which worked to great effect. Even the course profile didn’t work.

I have largely ignored power until then, but when I had no choice but to use it, I had to trust it. Not once did I look at distance or average speed, as these things really didn’t matter; I had to ride at a pace that I knew I could maintain for 50 hours; did it feel like I could chat to a friend riding beside me? If yes, good! If not, ease back.

As I’d received this information, I decided to ease off the gas even more. If I needed a longer or extra stop, I would take it. On telling Mark who was my lead support, he showed his annoyance too, and turned it into “contingency” not “up on schedule”.

There was so much support all along the route, which I’d not anticipated: all the way from Cornwall. One motorcyclist kept stopping, cheering, riding on a few miles, stopping, taking photos and riding on again. Through Bristol, Janet Tebbutt (one of the 8 women solo E2E Bicycle record holders – 1954 – 2 days. 15 hours and 24 minutes) who got a big wave and smile. Shortly after, climbing up from the river to Clifton, two guys from Bristol South got out their cowbells and chased me up the hill.

All the way through Bristol, people appeared, signposting the way through what was a quiet city and a good time to pass through.

My first longer planned stop, and what I called the end of stage one was at Hyundai, Alveston. It felt like a party atmosphere here, with support crew who I knew were joining, ready to jump in, and friends I wasn’t expecting, coming from afar to cheer me on with moral support. There were lots of people I didn’t know too. I troughed a pot noodle, gave some people hugs, changed to a new top and after 9 minutes, hit the road. Joining us were Emily and Tom, two of my friends from Royal Dean Forest Cycle Club and another friend, Abbie, who had driven all the way from Bedfordshire, who after a late clarion call had given up their weekend and annual leave just for me. A little further up, Mark’s mum, the wonderful Sue from Chipping Norton, appeared in the half dark, waving a union jack and shouting at the top of her voice. She’d previously dropped 10kg of chocolate off at the stop and appeared an hour later past Tewkesbury shouting with the same vigour as before.

As the darkness fell, the miles quietly ticked away. I continued in a world of my own, thinking of family and friends, wondering what they might be doing now (as it was between 2200 and midnight now). I felt great! Then gently, something started to happen. I first started to yawn and put this down to the hour. My legs were still whirring away. I’d navigated through a road closure, towns and villages, and was pleased that I’d be going through this stretch at night. During the day, there is so much traffic, noise, congestion and traffic lights, it isn’t pleasant. It felt like another world at night. A few miles later, I started to feel the chill, and looked behind me for the following van. It wasn’t there, and the second van I hadn’t seen for what felt like 2 hours. My body temperature was starting to drop rapidly now, despite my gilet and arm warmers. What felt like 5 minutes later, Mark and the support vehicle reappeared behind me. I found out later they had taken a wrong turn and it took a little time to catch up. It was now five minutes past midnight, and just a few minutes later than the planned stop of 0000

By the time I’d got in the van to get more kit, I was shivering. Wrapped up in a duvet, I ate: rice pudding, satsuma, some crisps, hydration. Mark cuddled me to help (or so he says), and without notice, suddenly, I was violently sick 3 times. To this, Abbie commented “There’s going to be a lot of carb-loaded rats in Wolverhampton tonight!” Everything I’d eaten was visible on the ground, and I became emotional, feeling John O Groats slip away. As my emotional brain took over, it took some persuasion to keep going, but whilst I couldn’t get any more food or hydration down in the van, Mark convinced me to get back on the bike, reminding me that once you’re sick, you feel better, and although I’d taken a hit, it wasn’t impossible to finish. Ignoring that I was now under fuelled, cold but with Doug the timekeeper’s hat on and a whole lot of clothes, I set of steadily again up the road. Surprisingly, my legs kept turning and felt as fresh as before, which amazed me. I thought my legs would fall off with this experience. I knew I was on borrowed time in terms of taking on more calories, and with all the will in the world, slowly but surely, I tried to eat on the go. The nausea stayed, but I got another 90 minutes up the road before I was sick again, everything I’d eaten came out again, and I found myself in the van once again, swearing at my useless body to just sort itself out. Once again, I thought it was game over. One by one, my friends spoke to me. Mark firstly tried to will me back on the bike to just keep going, daylight would be coming soon, and go until 24 hours. This felt too long. Dave won me over with “get back on the bike, just see if you can and if it happens again, then we can talk about stopping”. I know Mark wanted me to empty the tank completely before he called it off, all of us hoping that by some miracle, I’d be able to get some nutrition in and things would come good. When I got Abbie on her own, who felt like my friend and a mother, I said “nobody’s listening to me”. She could see me faltering on the bike and had started to worry for my safety. She didn’t come up with any suggestions, but just heard me out. After a cuddle, and a reminder that “it’s a decision to stop”, I got back on the bike and kept riding. About half a mile later, somewhere near Knutsford, my front tyre blew dramatically, and I wobbled all over the road. 2 minutes later, I had a new front wheel and I was off once again, into the rain and dark and approaching Warrington. Somehow, my legs were still turning, my quads didn’t hurt but I could feel them emptying of energy, and I was starting to struggle to make decisions about where I should be riding on the road.

We got through Wigan and I pulled up again. Mark loaded me into the van and got everyone out. He said, “Let’s try and rest up on for 20 minutes, try and get some sleep and see what happens”. It was 6am. I had wanted to be in Carnforth by then, the end of Stage 2, ready for the second half. It was our last chance. Funnily, he managed to sleep, where I just shut my eyes. When he woke, he said “Yep, you don’t look good, I’m calling it”. 19 hours of riding in 21 hours, 5000 metres of climbing. It wasn’t John O Groats, but it was my attempt, and I couldn’t have given any more. Fact.

I didn’t cry. I hugged all the crew, apologised for the unhappy ending and promised everyone breakfast. We divided ourselves into cars and headed back down the road, exhausted, but somehow more closely bonded than before. What I really learnt is that my emotional brain tried to take over when things went wrong. I had no idea that my legs could carry on for 6 hours with 15 good hours of racing in them and zero fuel. When it’s easy to bail, unlike the Americas, controlling emotion and being logical will see you more likely to succeed. I had to trust my team to make that decision for me when I kept getting back on the bike, and for that, I have learnt my biggest lesson. It is what happened many times on my adventure, and I need to call on that more when I’m at home.

I found a new friend in Doug Gale that weekend. Also supporting were Ian and Bridget Boon from Bristol, who had a purpose-built Vito specifically to support RRA attempts. Bridget and Ian are also cyclists who between them have a few accolades including Bridget’s 24-hour distance of 460 miles in 1993, and their tandem records in 1987. Between all officials, they brought a wealth of experience.

I had wanted to finish this chapter with victorious photos in John O Groats, regardless of finishing time as per the plan. I didn’t want to do the attempt officially as it’s all or nothing, and with an official attempt comes a lot of pressure. But it seemed necessary to gain the support crew that I had. However, having the support along the road and from the crew will stick with me forever. Most of the time, everything went to plan. The wind wasn’t perfect, and it rained during the night. Who knows how the rest would have unfolded had I not been ill. I learnt so much from what I did and have already reached out for help regarding the cold which seemed to trigger the sickness. Dave wrote a club report, which is shared with the most touching comment from another club friend and shared in this final chapter. I didn’t get the victory shot, and I wish I was younger so I could try again with what I’ve learnt. I had said to Mark that I was too old to try again but I have no regrets to have tried, even if I should have tried earlier. His response, having followed me for 21 hours was “I saw absolutely nothing that said you are too old. If you’d pulled up with arthritis or similar, then fair enough. It is harder at your age, but it’s not unachievable”. Dave has already sent through his ideas for what could be done better for LEJOG Attempt 2. It seems possible to write all day today as my emotional brain is dominating my logical brain, which is great for creativity but not good when you’re up against it!

I’ve had the time of my life and gifted with opportunities that most don’t have, and others only dream of over the last months. I still don’t feel worthy of writing a book, but never say never. I’ve got some good ideas for what next, so watch this space 😊.

As the band Journey once said: “Don’t stop believing”

Quotes from friend Dave and clubmate Ali

“It was an absolute privilege to help support Michelle Lee on her LEJOG attempt over the last few days. She was looking amazing for the majority of the effort and we all thought it was doable for a long time. For 369 miles the legs just kept spinning round like a machine. Sitting in the car for the whole time whilst that was going on, really hammered home just how ridiculously hard the 864mile record is The human body and digestive system just isn't designed for that duration of effort.

The weather God's weren't blowing hard enough and in the right direction either, which is an essential thing for a successful LEJOG attempt according to our Road Record Association observers. She was always about 45mins up on the schedule but after about 15 hours started struggling to keep food down and ended up dehydrated and lacking carbohydrates. To her credit she kept powering on for another 6 hours, throwing up and getting back on the bike but you can only go so long like that. At one point she even had a front tub blowout like a gunshot and did well to not crash. Matt Neale will be glad to know his front wheel got good use after that!

She had really experimented with getting the nutrition right but for whatever reason something didn't work out this time. Without the sickness and with the right weather and I totally believe she had the legs to do It!

It was amazing to help out on this well organized mission run by Michelle's partner Mark Leeming. They both gave it a massive shot, she say's never again but who knows! ” (Dave)

“I am so proud to be a member of this club, with Michelle’s incredible talent, courage and determination amongst us and the great volunteers who have stepped up to provide support. What a great effort Michelle. As Roosevelt might have said "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong woman stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the woman who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends herself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if she fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that her place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." (Ali)

Final note:

Thank you to all who have supported me one way or another this year. There are many! Before the attempt I also had a good catch up with Chris Murray, who has attempted E2E twice, who holds the CTT 24 hour record (493 miles) and whom I still believe will do it one day. I’m in no doubt that her experience helped me and helped me crystallise some of my thoughts.

Eminem: Lose Yourself (lyrics)

Look If you had One shot Or one opportunity To seize everything you ever wanted In one moment Would you capture it Or just let it slip?

Yo His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgettin' What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out He's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now The clocks run out, times up, over, blaow Snap back to reality, ope there goes gravity Ope, there goes Rabbit, he choked He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy? No He won't have it, he knows his whole back's to these ropes It don't matter, he's dope, he knows that, but he's broke He's so stagnant, he knows, when he goes back to this mobile home, that's when it's Back to the lab again, yo, this whole rhapsody Better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime You better

His soul's escaping, through this hole that is gaping This world is mine for the taking Make me king, as we move toward a New World Order A normal life is borin', but super stardom's close to post mortem It only grows harder, only grows hotter He blows, it's all over, these hoes is all on him Coast to coast shows, he's known as the Globetrotter Lonely roads, God only knows, he's grown farther from home, he's no father He goes home and barely knows his own daughter But hold your nose 'cause here goes the cold water These hoes don't want him no mo', he's cold product They moved on to the next schmo who flows, he nose dove and sold nada So the soap opera is told and unfolds, I suppose it's old partna, but the beat goes on Da-da-dum, da-dum, da-da

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime You better

No more games, I'ma change what you call rage Tear this motherfuckin' roof off like two dogs caged I was playin' in the beginnin', the mood all changed I been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage But I kept rhymin' and stepped right in the next cypher Best believe somebody's payin' the Pied Piper All the pain inside amplified by the Fact that I can't get by with my nine to Five and I can't provide the right type of Life for my family 'cause man, these goddamn food stamps don't buy diapers And its no movie, there's no Mekhi Phifer This is my life and these times are so hard And it's getting even harder tryna feed and water my seed, plus Teeter totter, caught up between bein' a father and a prima donna Baby mama drama, screamin' on her, too much For me to wanna stay in one spot, another day of monotony's Gotten me to the point, I'm like a snail I've got To formulate a plot or end up in jail or shot Success is my only motherfuckin' option, failure's not Mom, I love you, but this trailer's got to go, I cannot grow old in Salem's Lot So here I go, is my shot Feet, fail me not, this may be the only opportunity that I got

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime You better

You can do anything you set your mind to, man

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bangtan · 3 years

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BTS Makes History As 1st Asian Artist To Be Crowned IFPI’s Global Recording Artist Of The Year

BTS’s “dynamite” 2020 has led to them scoring the IFPI Global Recording Artist of the Year Award! The International Federation of the Phonographic Industry (IFPI) is a non-profit organization that represents the recorded music industry worldwide. Its annual Global Recording Artist of the Year Award recognizes an act’s worldwide popularity across digital and physical music formats (from streaming to vinyl), and it covers their entire collection of work. On March 4 local time, it was announced that BTS has grabbed the win for 2020. BTS is now the first winner to perform primarily in a language other than English, and they’re the first South Korean and Asian act to achieve the feat. All previous recipients have been from either North America (Taylor Swift, Drake) or the United Kingdom (One Direction, Adele, Ed Sheeran). BTS’s hugely successful 2020 included the release of their Billboard 200-topping album “Map of the Soul: 7,” which IFPI notes is one of the most pre-ordered albums of all time. They went on to share their Japanese language album “Map of the Soul : 7 ~ The Journey ~” in July, which surpassed 500,000 copies within just two days of its release. The group then made history with their smash hit single “Dynamite,” becoming the first all-Korean act to reach No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. The song has also been nominated for a Grammy in the Best Pop Duo/Group Performance category. BTS continued their success with the release of their album “BE” in November, which became their fifth album to top the Billboard 200. IFPI’s Top 10 Global Recording Artists of 2020 are: 1. BTS 2. Taylor Swift 3. Drake 4. The Weeknd 5. Billie Eilish 6. Eminem 7. Post Malone 8. Ariana Grande 9. Juice Wrld 10. Justin Bieber BTS previously took No. 2 on the IFPI’s Global Recording Artist of the Year chart in 2018 and No. 7 in 2019. Congratulations to BTS!

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#bangtan #bts #jimin #jungkook #rm #v #suga #jhope #jin #t:article #210305

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the-good-bad-truth · 2 years

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Last month, I did a post on the PR relationship of Mgk and Megan Fox. It was a really long post because there was a lot to cover. The problem is I felt I couldn’t really talk about them as Individuals and the hate and struggles each of them separately face. Today, I will be looking at Mgk and how he is constantly hated on and I want to see if it’s deserved or if people are just haters. I will be doing the same for his twin flame. Let me give you guys a brief Introduction on him and his career. He was raised in Cleveland, Ohio and lived with his aunt and father, who struggled with alcohol. His mother left his father and practically abandoned him when he was like 9. After that he would get into trouble through drugs, when he was like 11 and would be bullied. This caused him to have a strained bond w/his father and when he was like 18 he ended up moving in with his friend, Slim to help him produce a rap career. He says he would be bullied and get beat up for being a white rapper but it just made him want to work even harder. He also had to start working because he had a daughter named Cassie, who he is really close with but she lives in Ohio w/her mom. Eventually, he was signed to Bad Boy records(now also Interscope records) and would always be on tour whether in Europe, south America, or warped tour. Overall he has released 6 albums and 6 eps/mixtapes, w/ TTMD and Mainstream Sellout being his biggest albums. I think if I had to pinpoint when the mgk hate train started, I would say it would have to have been in 2018. This is when that whole Eminem beef started after Em dissed him and Mgk responded w/rap devil. As I was doing my digging about this beef it said Em was being sent a secret diss that mgk did on a song where he says “you rap your not gods” and then also tweeted it out. I think that Em dissed mgk because of a tweet where he said that Em's daughter was hot in 2012. She was 16 and mgk was 21, but he says that he didn’t know how old she was. I kind of will excuse him for that, although he probably shouldn’t have talked about someone’s daughter no matter her age. At the same time, Eminem always comes for people so, he shouldn’t be to upset when people say things about him or personal life. Anyways, what I don’t understand about this beef is how many people were upset that mgk dissed em back after em released “Killshot”. Idk if because I’m not really knowledgeable in rap beefs/community but if someone disses you, no matter who that person is shouldn’t you diss back and defend yourself? At the end of day, this beef happened like 4 yrs ago and Em still kind of mentions mgk in his songs, but I think that both sides should just let it go and stop hating on mgk. Like it would be a movie trailer that mgk is starring in and people will be like “Eminem is the goat”. It’s like move on because if you have to comment every time mgk is mentioned at Em won, then did he really? The next time Mgk was really getting hate was when he decided to dive deeper into a more pop-punk sound. I agree that some of the songs aren’t really that good but they aren’t terrible, they are just very generic and repetitive. I also don’t think he is necessarily saving rock but he is helping it become more popular. Think about it, music isn’t shared or sold as it once did where you had to sell through Cds. Now, it’s more through social media, especially with tiktok. I think Mgk knows this and that’s why he makes the songs sound more fun, easy to learn (lyric and instrument wise), and something young people will actually want to pay to listen to. I also somewhat agree when people say that he is profiting or romanticizing toxic topics and the Goth/emo community.( Megan fox isn’t an emo girl or Goth.) However, how is that any different to when rock bands will sexualize women or talk about death and drugs, he’s just doing it with a fun guitar melody. Another thing is people say he is trying to copy Mac Miller or Lil Peep all because he dyed his hair pink and talks about his struggle with depression and drugs. I think it was last year, he went on a podcast where his words were taken out of context like they usually are. He was talking about how he went on warped tour and he saw the bands were wearing comfortable shoes. After that clip was released, bands were coming out and saying how he was disrespectful and that they would sleep in vans, practically starve and he doesn’t know what that feels like cuz he’s rich. The thing is Mgk was at Warped tour, he also struggled and he’s always had a rock edge to him. I think that they didn’t understand what he was saying, he wasn’t dissing the rock community or the bands that actually work hard. He was talking about how the idea of a “rockstar” has gone stale and that bands don’t know how to balance being talented/relatable while also knowing how to put on a show and make rock fun. In a way, he was saying what the older rock bands were saying but when he says it he’s an idiot. One person who misunderstood this was Slipknot's frontman, Corey Taylor. To look at this “feud”, let’s go to where it started. When Mgk was working on TTMD, Travis and him wanted Corey to do vocals on the song, “Can’t look back”. Corey agreed and did the vocals but Mgk had some notes for Corey. I think that Corey got defensive because he probably felt that Mgk was criticizing him when all Mgk wanted was to have HIS song to sound the best it could. Corey ended up backing out and I guess later Corey saw the small already misinterpreted clip of comfortable shoes and decided then in an interview basically called Mgk a poser. Here’s the thing about Corey and how the Rock media likes to treat him where there are so many thumbnails where they always ask Corey what he thinks of new music, topics, rock’s future etc. I think that this is the media’s and fan’s fault because they like to make things a bigger deal than they are. Anyways, Mgk defended himself and called Slipknot “50 year old dudes in weird masks”. I guess slipknot fans got upset and then Corey posted the emails, but by then Mgk was already annoyed that he responded with insults. This only made it worse for mgk and people started bringing up the em stuff again. I also think that Corey’s reasoning was that he was defending rock music and only did it because of what mgk said about comfortable shoes. Another funny thing is that Corey said that mgk failed and switched genres but didn’t Corey try to rap in this one country/rock song. Look it up, it's called “Live the madness” with Moonshine Bandits,(It also sounds a lot like mgk’s song w/Kid Rock called “Bad MotherFucker) but that could just be me, go find it and judge for yourselves. Overall, people like to hate on Mgk for everything and they will stop at nothing. This might just be to cancel culture, but they like to dig up old 2012 tweets of Mgk and call him a creep and racist. I don’t think he is, although he probably should have just kept those tweets to himself and they were really stupid things for him to say. Idk if people know that in 2020, Mgk was in the streets protesting, handing out water & snacks and said that if any fan of his didn't agree that people should be treated fairly regardless of skin color then they should stop listening to his music and he wouldn’t care. I think recently he said that he’s going to move forward and create a diff sound for rap/hip hop but people think he’s quitting rock. I think it’s because people don’t understand that you can do more than one genre and combine genres. Overall, I feel that he’s misunderstood and is a constantly punching bag for the media. With his relationship w/Megan, it helps him getting praise but it’s fake because once they break up people are going to clown and hate on him. He is being called toxic for the things she chooses to say and his music and work are being constantly overshadowed by the hate and his relationship.

#Mgk #Machine gun kelly #hotel diablo #tickets to my downfall #Mainstream Sellout #Colson Baker #megan fox #Celebs #Hate #music #Rockstar #Pop Punk

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midnightsslut · 3 years

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Taylor Swift Tours Masterpost

Hey everyone! For absolutely no reason at all, I’ve decided to compile a masterpost of all the regular setlists, surprise songs, covers, and guests on Taylor’s tours with links to YouTube videos when available (I’m only including videos that weren’t featured in official tour movies). I’ve noticed that, although there are posts like this for specific tours, like Red or reputation, some of this information is pretty hard to find, and it might be useful to some to have it all in one place. Also, I’m something of a Taylor Swift live performance ~connoisseur (💀), so I thought I might share. :) Here we go

Note: This is only part one. I don’t know when the posts for Red, 1989, and reputation will be up.

Part One: Fearless & Speak Now

Fearless Tour (April 23, 2009-July 10, 2010)

This tour did not feature a ‘surprise song slot,’ but she did sometimes change the setlist up a bit. She also brought out a couple of surprise guests (most notably John Mayer and Katy Perry), but not nearly as many as she did on her later tours.

Regular setlist: Fearless Tour

1. ‘You Belong with Me’

2. ‘Our Song’

3. ‘Tell Me Why’

4. ‘Teardrops on My Guitar’

5. ‘Fearless’

6. ‘Forever & Always’

7. ‘Hey Stephen’

8. ‘Fifteen’

9. ‘Tim McGraw’

10. ‘White Horse’ (x)

11. ‘Love Story’

12. ‘The Way I Loved You’ (x)

13. ‘You’re Not Sorry’ / ‘What Goes Around… Comes Around’ (x)

14. ‘Picture to Burn’

15. ‘Change’ (x)

16. ‘I’m Only Me When I’m with You’ (2009) (x) OR ‘Today Was a Fairytale’ (2010)

17. ‘Should’ve Said No’ (extended version)

Footnotes:

*Starting from the show in Uncasville, Connecticut on August 28, 2009, ‘Change’ was removed from the setlist. It was added back in Greensville, South Carolina on September 4, 2009. Starting from the show in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania on October 1, 2009, it was removed again.

*European shows on the 2009 leg often removed ‘I’m Only Me When I’m with You’ as well as ‘Change.’

*Starting from the show in Brisbane, Australia on February 4, 2010, ‘Today Was a Fairytale’ replaced ‘I’m Only Me When I’m with You’ in the encore.

Surprise songs:

1. ‘The Best Day’ - Evansville, Indiana (April 23, 2009) Note: This was actually the first show of the tour. Unfortunately, I haven’t found a video of this performance.

2. ‘Two Is Better Than One’ - Brisbane, Australia (February 4, 2010) (x)

3. ‘The Best Day’ - Moline, Illinois (May 8, 2010) (x)

4. ‘Jump Then Fall’ - Foxborough, Massachusetts (June 5, 2010) (x)

Surprise guest performances:

1. ‘Your Body is a Wonderland’ and ‘White Horse’ (already part of the regular acoustic set but performed as a duet here) with John Mayer - Los Angeles, CA (May 22, 2009) (x)

2. ‘The Way You Love Me’ with Faith Hill - Nashville, TN (September 12, 2009) (x)

3. ‘Hot N Cold’ with Katy Perry - Los Angeles, CA (April 15, 2010)

Speak Now World Tour (February 9, 2011-March 18, 2012)

Regular setlists:

Eurasia (February 9, 2011-March 30, 2011)

Note: All of the performances linked below are from the Eurasian leg. Therefore, their quality is questionable. I’m only including these because this leg had a slightly different wardrobe than the North American leg which was recorded for the tour movie. I’m not including videos from performances where the costume is the same.

1. ‘Sparks Fly’

2. ‘Mine’

3. ‘The Story of Us’

4. ‘Back to December’ / ‘Apologize’ / ‘You’re Not Sorry’ (x)

5. ‘Better Than Revenge’ (x)

6. ‘Speak Now’

7. ‘Fearless’ / ‘I’m Yours’ / ‘Hey, Soul Sister’

8. ‘Fifteen’ (x)

9. ‘You Belong with Me’

10. ‘Dear John’ (x) - I’m only including this video because she wore her hair loose lol

11. ‘Enchanted’ (x)

12. ‘Long Live’ (x)

13. ‘Love Story’ (x)

North America & Oceania (May 21, 2011-March 18, 2012)

This is based solely on the first North American show

1. ‘Sparks Fly’

2. ‘Mine’

3. ‘The Story of Us’

4. ‘Our Song’

5. ‘Mean’

6. ‘Back to December’ / ‘Apologize’ / ‘You’re Not Sorry’

7. ‘Better Than Revenge’

8. ‘Speak Now’

9. ‘Fearless’ / ‘I’m Yours’ / ‘Hey, Soul Sister’

10. ‘Last Kiss’

11. ‘You Belong with Me’

12. ‘Dear John’

13. ‘Enchanted’

14. ‘Haunted’

15. ‘Long Live’

16. ‘Fifteen’

17. ‘Love Story’

Notes:

Starting from the show in Toronto, Canada on July 15, 2011, Taylor started playing acoustic covers right after her performance of ‘Last Kiss.’

Starting from the show in Denver, CO, on September 27, 2011, ‘Ours’ was added to the encore, right before the performance of ‘Fifteen’. This marked the live debut of the song. If Taylor had a surprise guest, this was the song she would usually cut from the setlist.

Starting from the show in Perth, Australia on March 2, 2012, ‘Safe & Sound’ (x) was added to the encore. ‘Ours’ (x) was shifted to the acoustic set and was played right before ‘Last Kiss.’ It was only skipped at the show in Auckland on March 17. I’m including a video because, although the performance from the encore was featured in the tour movie, this version takes place on the B-stage and has a different costume (the purple Susan Hilferty dress she wore for half the show lol).

At the shows in Melbourne, Australia on March 12, 2012 and Auckland, New Zealand on March 16, 2012, ‘Fearless’ was skipped.

Surprise covers:

1. ‘Livin’ on a Prayer’ by Bon Jovi - Newark, NJ (July 19, 2011) (x)

2. ‘Dancing in the Dark’ by Bruce Springsteen / ‘Livin’ on a Prayer’ by Bon Jovi - Newark, NJ (July 20 & 24, 2011) (x), (x)

3. ‘Cowboy Take Me Away’ by the Dixie Chicks - Newark, NJ (July 23, 2011) (x)

4. ‘Lose Yourself’ by Eminem and ‘Smile’ by Uncle Kracker’ - Grand Rapids, MI (July 28, 2011) (x)

5. ‘Jack & Diane’ by John Mallencamp and ‘I Want You Back’ by the Jackson 5 - Indianapolis, IN (July 29, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘I Want You Back’ was featured on the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio.

6. ‘I Try’ by Macy Gray and ‘My Wish’ by the Rascal Flatts - Cleveland, OH (July 30, 2011) (x)

7. ‘I Heard It Through the Grapevine’ by Gladys Knight & the Pips and ‘Ghetto Superstar’ by Mya - Washington, DC (August 2, 2011) (x)

8. ‘Stay (I Missed You)’ by Lisa Loeb and ‘A Sorta Fairytale’ by Tori Amos - Washington, DC (August 3, 2011) (x)

9. ‘Who Knew’ by P!nk and ‘Unpretty’ by TLC - Philadelphia, PA (August 6, 2011) (x)

10. ‘Sugar, We’re Goin Down’ by Fall Out Boy - Rosemont, IL (August 9-10, 2011) (x)

11. ‘Just a Dream’ by Nelly - St Louis, MO (August 13-14, 2011) (x)

12. ‘God Only Knows’ by The Beach Boys and ‘Sweet Escape’ by Gwen Stefani - Los Angeles, CA (August 23-24, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘Sweet Escape’ was featured as a bonus track on the Target deluxe version of the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio.

13. ‘This Love’ by Maroon 5 and Bette Davis Eyes’ by Jackie DeShannon - Los Angeles, CA (August 27, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘Bette Davis Eyes’ was featured on the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio.

14. ‘Realize’ by Colbie Caillat’ - Los Angeles, CA (August 28, 2011) (x)

15. ‘Drops of Jupiter’ by Train - San Jose, CA (September 1, 2011) (x)

Note: ‘Drops of Jupiter’ was included in the Speak Now World Tour concert movie. An audio was also featured on the standard CD.

16. ‘Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)’ by Green Day - San Jose, CA (September 2, 2011) (x)

17. ‘Untouchable’ by Luna Halo - Sacramento, CA (September 3, 2011) (x)

18. ‘Closer to Love’ by Matt Kearney - Portland, OR (September 6, 2011) (x)

19. ‘You & Me’ by Dave Matthews Band - Tacoma, WA (September 7, 2011) (x)

20. ‘Nashville’ by David Mead - Nashville, TN (September 16-17, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘Nashville’ was featured as a bonus track on the Target deluxe version of the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio. PS: This is one of my favorite covers she’s ever done.

21. ‘Lucky’ by Britney Spears - Bossier City, LA (September 20, 2011) (x)

22. ‘Swing, Swing’ by The All-American Rejects - Tulsa, OK (September 21, 2011) (x)

23. ‘How to Save a Life’ by The Fray - Denver, CO (September 27, 2011) (x)

24. ‘Animal’ by The Neon Trees - Salt Lake City, UT (September 28, 2011) (x)

25. ‘Baby Girl’ by Sugarland - Atlanta, GA (October 1-2, 2011) (x)

26. ‘Ain’t Nothing ‘Bout You’ by Brooks & Dunn - North Little Rock, AR (October 4, 2011) (x)

27. ‘Breathless’ by Better Than Ezra - New Orleans, LA (October 5, 2011) (x)

28. ‘Boys of Summer’ by Don Henley - Dallas, TX (October 8, 2011) (x)

29. ‘The Back of Your Hand’ by Dwight Yoakam - Louisville, KY (October 11, 2011) (x)

30. ‘Wide Open Spaces’ by The Dixie Chicks - Lubbock, TX (October 14, 2011) (x)

31. ‘What Hurts the Most’ by Jeffrey Steele - Oklahoma City, OK (October 15, 2011) (x)

32. ‘Dare You to Move’ by Switchfoot - San Diego, CA (October 20, 2011) (x)

33. ‘No Parade’ by Jordin Sparks - Glendale, AZ (October 21, 2011) (x)

34. ‘You Learn’ by Alanis Morissette, ‘Baby’ by Justin Bieber, and ‘She’s So High by Tal Bachman (all played in succession along with ‘You Belong with Me’) - Toronto, Canada (July 15, 2011) (x)

35. ‘Complicated’ by Avril Lavigne, ‘Baby’ by Justin Bieber, and ‘I’m Like a Bird’ by Nelly Furtado - Toronto, Canada (July 16, 2011) (x), (x), (x)

Note: She only played excerpts from each song. A full video isn’t available.

36. ‘Complicated’ by Carolyn Dawn Johnson - Edmonton, Canada (August 18, 2011) (x)

37. ‘Summer of 69’ by Bryan Adams - Vancouver, Canada (September 10, 2011) (x)

38. ‘Where Were You (When the World Stopped Turning)’ by Alan Jackson - Vancouver, Canada (September 11, 2011) (x)

39. ‘All You Wanted’ by Michelle Branch - Glendale AZ, (October 22, 2011) & San Antonio, TX (October 25, 2011) (x)

40. ‘Run’ by George Strait - San Antonio, TX (October 26, 2011) (x)

41. ‘Hold On’ by Jack Ingram - Memphis, TN (October 30, 2011) (x) (skip to 21:46; this video includes all the Speak Now Tour covers)

42. ‘Cry Me a River’ by Justin Timberlake - New York, NY (November 21, 2011) (x)

Surprise guests:

1. ‘Baby’ with Justin Bieber - Los Angeles, CA (August 23, 2011) (x)

2. ‘I’m Yours’ with Jason Mraz - Los Angeles, CA (August 24, 2011) (x)

3. ‘Tonight, Tonight’ with Hot Chelle Rae - Los Angeles, CA (August 27, 2011), (x)

4. ‘Super Bass’ with Nicki Minaj - Los Angeles, CA (August 28, 2011) (x)

5. ‘That’s What You Get’ with Hayley Williams - Nashville, TN (September 16, 2011) (x)

6. ‘Bleed Red’ with Ronnie Dunn - Nashville, TN (September 16, 2011) (x)

7. ‘Big Star’ with Kenny Chesney - Nashville, TN (September 17, 2011) (x)

8. ‘Keep Your Head Up’ with Andy Grammer - Nashville, TN (September 17, 2011) (x)

9. ‘Just to See You Smile’ with Tim McGraw - Nashville, TN (September 17, 2011) (x)

10. ‘Yeah!’ with Usher - Atlanta, GA (October 1, 2011) (x)

11. ‘Live Your Life’ with T.I. - Atlanta, GA (October 2, 2011) (x)

12. ‘Meant to Live’ with Jon Foreman - Glendale, AZ (October 21, 2011) (x)

13. ‘She’s So High’ with Tal Bachman - Vancouver, Canada (September 10, 2011) (x)

14. ‘The Middle’ with Jim Adkins - Glendale, AZ (October 22, 2011) (x)

15. ‘Just a Dream’ with Nelly - Houston, TX (November 5, 2011) (x)

16. ‘Right Round’ with Flo Rida - Miami, FL (November 13, 2011) (x)

17. ‘Alright’ with Darius Rucker - Columbia, SC (November 18, 2011) (x)

18. ‘Who Says’ with Selena Gomez - New York, NY (November 22, 2011) (x)

19. ‘Fire and Rain’ and ‘Fifteen’ (part of the regular setlist but performed as a duet here) with James Taylor - New York, NY (November 22, 2011) (x)

Surprise songs.

1. ‘Superman’ - Kansas City, MO (September 24, 2011) (x)

Note: This is the only live performance of ‘Superman’ to date. The video begins with an excerpt of her ‘Last Kiss’ performance, so you’ll have to skip to circa 1:30, but unlike other recordings, it’s complete. This is six minutes of pure joy.

2. ‘Never Grow Up’ - Lexington, KY (October 29, 2011), Houston, TX (November 5, 2011), Raleigh, NC (November 17, 2011) (x)

3. ‘Eyes Open’ - Auckland, New Zealand (March 17, 2012) (x)

Note: This marked the live debut of the song, as it had not even been released at the time of the performance.

#live #speak now #speak now tour #masterpost #fearless tour #audio #video #speak now world tour #fearless #Taylor Swift #covers #surprise songs #Taylor Swift live

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fyeah-bangtan7 · 3 years

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A Deep Conversation with BTS' RM on His Group's Early Years, Drake, Whether BTS Is K-Pop, and More

"I had a sense of urgency and desperation about going after my dreams," says BTS' leader

I was someone who wanted to go to a top college, an Ivy League school by American standards,” says RM, BTS’ leader. “I was a typical student who was trying hard to achieve. And then I trusted [HYBE founder] Mr. Bang, and I started to walk down a different path. And I had a sense of urgency and desperation about going after my dreams.” RM’s gifts as a rapper, songwriter, and producer have been essential to BTS’s development, as have his wide-ranging intellectual interests. In an interview from his label’s headquarters, the artist formerly known as Rap Monster discussed whether BTS should be considered K-pop, the uniqueness of South Korean hip-hop, the highlights of the Most Beautiful Moment in Life era, and more.

You quoted the great abstract artist Kim Whan-ki recently: “I’m Korean, and I can’t do anything not Korean. I can’t do anything apart from this, because I am an outsider.” You said that was a key thing you’ve been thinking about lately. How does that idea apply to your work? So much of the pop and hip-hop I listened to came from America. But for me, as a Korean, I think we have our own characteristics and some kind of localized identity. I can’t really explain it very well, but there are some characteristics that we Koreans have, or maybe Eastern people. So we try to kind of combine those two things into one, and I feel that we created a new genre. Some may call it K-pop; some may call it BTS, or some Eastern-Western combined music, but I think that’s what we’re doing. If you think about the Silk Road in the past, there’s this idea of Eastern people and Western people meeting on some kind of, like, big road and maybe doing selling and buying of stuff. I think this story repeats itself, and some kind of new, interesting phenomenon is happening. We feel very honored to be existing in the very eye of this big hurricane.

There’s so much great Korean hip-hop, including your early heroes Epik High, who are still active. What did you hear in it early on, and what do you hear in it now? There’s always a process of when something new comes into another culture, where the identity gets transformed and it changes and adapts to this new place. Obviously, there are differences between Korea and the United States that affect the music. For example, Korea is not a multiethnic country like the United States. So there are different sensitivities that are underlying the music. Korean rappers of course have their own unique and different lyricism, their own situations and hardships that they fit into the process. As a Korean, obviously, these are the things that resonate with me.Obviously, there’s a saying there’s nothing new under the sun. So especially for people like us, in the margins of the world, so to speak, we think about how can we transform this and how can we make this our own. So these are the things that I think about when I try to balance the inspiration of Korean and American rappers. And, I think, now though, there’s a convergence of all genres of music.

When BTS first started, there was this conflict in some people’s minds and in your own between the idea of being a rapper or being an idol, which we’d call a pop star. This is obviously something you’ve addressed in song. Maybe you can explain a little about that conflict and why it seemed so important at the time? When I was young, I wanted to be a writer of prose and poetry, and then I found rap. And a lot of what I wanted to do went into the music. And, yes, there was this idea of being a pure artist or a pure rapper. So in the beginning, it is true that when we were debuting as a pop act, there were times when I had to sort of reorganize my identity and then reflect on what my identity is. And at the beginning we didn’t see positive results. We didn’t have a lot of fans. We didn’t have great results. There were some times when we were mocked.

So it is true that it took some time for that identity to develop and settle itself. But, you know, whether it’s rap or pop music, or whatever it is, it is another method for me to show my mind and express my voice, and having that resonate with people. So a lot of that conflict resolved itself. And I think things today are very different from what they were like in 2013, because even though there’s still a lot of discussion about what is pure, what is authentic, what is sincere, what’s an artist, what’s a pop musician, those boundaries have become less and less meaningful. As long as I can show what I’ve written, it’s valid as the continuation of my dream and what I always wanted to do.

It feels like BTS really found itself around the time of Most Beautiful Moment of Life. That’s where everything came together. How do you look back on that time? Despite the name, Most Beautiful Moment in Life, that was actually a very tumultuous period for me and for us. There was the tough image we had in 2 Cool 4 Skool, in those early stages, a sort of exaggerated expression of toughness and that angst. And then we sort of slowed down a little bit and tried to express the emotions of young people who have really nothing more than dreams. It was a more honest sort of expression, and we witnessed how it was resonating with a lot of people.There was some confusion because this was something new, and we were showing ourselves to be more vulnerable, more delicate, which was very different. But we realized that it was meaningful, and as we went forward to the Love Yourself series, we started to discover that more and more as we continued.

I know that many fans don’t see BTS as part of K-pop. And you, yourselves, have said that “BTS is the genre.” How do you see it? That’s a very important debate. Because what they call K-pop, that genre is expanding very fast. For example, some so-called K-pop groups have only foreigners, from Europe, India, China, like, everywhere. There are no Korean members, but they do the K-pop thing, they’re switching the parts, and so on. BTS is expanding very fast as well. And K-pop is now so wide. Somebody could say that K-pop is for Koreans who sing a Korean song. That could be K-pop. But what about “Dynamite”? We sing the song in English. But we’re all Koreans, so somebody may say it’s a K-pop song. Or they may say it’s just a pop song, because it’s in English. But we don’t actually really care about whether people see us as inside or outside K-pop. The important fact is that we’re all Koreans, and we’re singing a pop song. So that’s the reason why we said that our genre is just BTS. That debate is very important for the music industry, but it doesn’t mean very much for us members.

What music really changed your idea of what’s artistically possible? I started with Nas, Eminem, the golden age of hip-hop. And the turning point was Drake, in 2009, when he released Thank You Later. That album was kind of shocking for me because it was kind of a freaky thing that a rapper actually sang. So after that a lot of rappers began to sing, deciding to put the melodies into their songs across the genres, between raps and melody. So, yeah, that was the moment.

When you rapped that your “shadow … is called hesitation,” what did you mean by that? It can be called hesitation or cautiousness, but, I think, there is a form of hesitation that prevents you from taking risks and prevents you from challenging yourself.

I know you motivated the members by saying that your grandkids might watch your Grammys performance someday. Is that something you think about often? It gives me a lot of goosebumps sometimes that our every moment leaves traces online where everyone can see them. So, yeah, I think that helps us keep motivated.

Some film actors have a saying, “Pain is temporary. Film is forever.” [Nods.] Life is short. Art is forever.

#bangtan #rm #m:rolling stone #o:interview #210518

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aegon · 4 years

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taylors talents get underplayed a lot on this site. i’m glad it’s only here that’s the case and in the real world people recognize her songwriting and performance. if it’s only taylors “white privilege” helping her succeed why are other white artists not doing that good? why is she consistently on top in not just america but globally (i speak not from american perspective). she’s extremely huge in south east asia, india, china & more. the hate taylor get on this cite is strange

okay guess it’s swift discourse time?

she’s...not underplayed on tumblr at all, mate. she’s a tumblr darling, most of the blogs I’ve seen on here absolutely adore her and follow/manage blogs entirely dedicated to her and her music, like what website are you on?? my dash is literally full of her right now, yikes.

you seem to seriously underestimate how far and how pervasive american culture goes. if you’re famous in america, you’re famous in the world. I don’t see that as a standard for deserving fame or for remarkable talent, you see.

you know who else is super popular worldwide? the kardashians. do they deserve their fame for being talented or whatever? no, but they’re really good at business and selling a product. and american media adores putting them in the spotlight, and people love following those in the spotlight. especially when they’re american.

and that’s what taylor is - an american product, a symbol, a poster child for success. she’s white and blonde and pretty and that’s an ideal standard worldwide. she’s constantly in the spotlight, so has insane exposure. she’s one of the faces of american music culture, which in itself, is super popular internationally. people know of eminem before they know their own local rappers, regardless of who’s more talented. that’s how powerful american influence is.

you’re missing the point of why lots of poc judge her for her white privilege. that spotlight? that exposure to the world? all that advertising? that’s a privilege not granted to those who are likely better than she is, because she ticks every single box for attention: white, attractive, blonde, the innocent victim, the girl-next-door - which isn’t something every white artist manages to do.

by default, she meets the criteria for success so the expectations set on her to be exceptional are a lot less than, say, someone like janelle monae who’s incredibly talented but doesn’t get as much media attention despite also being a successful award-winning artist herself. basically, it’s not hard for taylor to wow everyone, she pretty much just needs to strum a guitar and say something like “you smell like my favourite jumper” and everyone starts crying.

but you said “okay but why does she have so many fans then?????? got u” so, to sum up: taylor is a quality product that american media have invested time and money in to advertise insanely hard, and good advertisements of quality products always work. people eat that shit up. it’s how the kardashians do so well, too.

#imagine thinking taylor is underrated on tumblr #anyway not everyone has to be a swiftie or whatever #dear lord #aly rants #long post #anonymous #answered #anti taylor swift

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bourbon-ontherocks · 4 years

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Tagged by the amazing @bethsuglywigs @riosnecktattoo @jade-marie @00gangfriend00 and @missmaxime (💕💕💕💕💕)

Rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better.

name/nickname: Buddy

Gender: do I even know

Star sign: taurus

Height: 163cm/5'4" according to this conversion website

Time: is fake

Birthday: Star Wars Day

Favorite bands: Within Temptation, ABBA, Shinedown, New Years Day, Nightwish, Delain, Queen

Favorite solo artists: Barbra Streisand, Elton John, Bonnie Tyler, Eminem, Joan Baez, Mylene Farmer, Woodkid

Song stuck in my head: probably something by Delain or Dark Sarah since I've been listening to both a lot lately

Last movie: no idea

Last show: santa clarita diet

When did I create this blog: last month. You know, march 2020??

What I post: mostly good girls, a bit of crazy ex girlfriend and glow, and a pinch of miscellaneous memes

Last thing googled: conversion cm to feet inches

Other blogs: nope

Do I get asks: yup

why I chose my url: because of my favourite GG otp, Beth x Bourbon glass

Following: nobody

Followers: you guys have followers???

average hours of sleep: wildly inconsistant

Lucky number: 7

Instruments: piano and guitar

what am I wearing: my skin. Who are you, aliens??

Dream job: hermit

Dream trip: US roadtrip, South America (again), Australia

Favourite food: all of it but it's better if it has chocolate or strong cheese in it

Nationality: French

Favourite song: currently Gods Speak by Dark Sarah

Last book read: Mamie Luger by Benoît Philippon

top three fictional universes I’d like to live in: Harry Potter, the Discworld, and Good Girls because time doesn't exist and you can get away with anything

I tag: @sothischickshe @juuuunaaaaoooo @elise-jupiterstyle @serenata-your-neighborhood-lefty @jomiddlemarch and the first 15 people who'll read this

#tagging game

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peoniarose · 3 years

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This is a fun get to know me game. I enjoyed playing this. Sorry for being late on this but meh...life. Thank you to @magicrowiswritingstuff and @ithinkwehitametaphor for tagging me!!

Nickname: On Tumblr I go by peoniarose but out in the real world I go by CynCyn, Cyndi, or Cynthesizer.

Pronouns: I like to go by she, her, or overlord...I don’t think that is asking for too much lol!

Star sign: I am a Libra! Where are my fellow scales at?

Height: I am 5′6...

Time currently: 8:14pm on the west coast.

Birthday: 17th of October. I love being a Fall baby!

Favorite groups/bands: From the top of my head (and I know I will miss a few): One Direction, Fall Out Boy, Panic! At The Disco, Queen, Journey, Backstreet Boys, BTS, Linkin Park, Imagine Dragons, Pentatonix Green Day...

Favorite solo artists: (I am sure there will be some that are left out) Prince, Selena, Adele, Eminem, Harry Styles, Ne-Yo, Rihanna, Taylor Swift, Halsey...

Song stuck in my head: Little Bit of Luck from Audrey Hepburn’s My Fair Lady (there is something about that tune that is catchy)

Last movie you watched: A Little Chaos...This movie has Kate Winslet, Alan Rickman, Stanley Tucci, and Helen McCroy. What more can you ask for?!)

Last show you binged: Bar Rescue...I will not apologize for this. Please let me know if you watched the episode about the bar called Swanky Bubbles. This show is a hilarious good time.

When you created your blog: I honestly have no idea. I don’t even remember how I found tumblr. I came back to my account couple of years ago when I kept seeing funny Tumblr posts and here I am...Finally somewhat communicating with people. I think I have made some good progress =)

Last thing I googled: The title of a movie I just watched (A Little Chaos). I am sometimes bad with names. Forgive me in advance.

Other blogs: I do have another blog @cynderbelle but I have yet to do anything with it so I don’t remember if there is anything on it.

Why I chose my url: I don’t remember why. I like those flowers, so I think I chose it off the fly.

Do you get asks: No, but I would like to get some. I recently started participating in these Tag games...do those count?

How many people are you following: I am following 1113 people...I love you all!

How many followers: I currently have 91 followers...I love you all!

Average hours of sleep: Not enough to be honest.

Lucky number: I don’t have a lucky number.

Instruments: When I was in high school I played the trumpet and alto sax. I really want to learn how to play the violin.

Currently wearing: Blue jeans, white ankle socks, black t-shirt with a batman logo, glasses, and my hair is messily up in a high ponytail...I am a hot mess right now lol!

Dream job: I would love to just write and live off of my opinions of various different things...but mostly I just want to write and read.

Dream trip: I would love to explore Europe, Japan, Singapore, US, South America....and some other places.

Favorite food: It’s a toss up between Chinese, Sushi, Pho, and Mexican.

Favorite song: My favorite song switches from time to time. Currently my favorite song is Lover by Taylor Swift. Hearing about domesticity makes me excited to find someone to share that with.

Top 3 fictional worlds to live in: Star Wars, Marvel, and DC. For Star Wars I would love to go on adventures with Din and offer sarcastic commentary. In Marvel I want to either hang out with Jimmy Woo (who is one of my new faves! I seriously love this man. He is friend, boyfriend, and husband material guys!) or team up with Sam and Bucky (is it because I am watching The Falcon and the Winter Soldier...yes...yes it is). In DC I would like be in the Young Justice verse and team up with Dick Grayson *heart eyes*!!!

This game was fun to participate in! I am going to tag (no pressure) @tellyouamystery @ionlyjoinedforboydholbrook @boydhoebrook @holbrook-boyd @everyhowlmarksthedead and whoever else wants to join in on the fun

#fun #tagging game #fun game #a good time

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marketresearchcapture · 2 years

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#Regulating Valve Market Global Regulating Valve Market Regulating Valve Market 2022 Regulating Valve Industry Regulating Valve Applications

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melobee · 4 years

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30 Questions

Rule: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you want to get to know better

G’day mates! Welcome to my 30 questions post! This one tagged me to do this. So yeah blame her for filling up your dashboard....jk love you Laura 💜

Question 1: Name/Nickname

Melissa is my full name but my nickname I’ve gone by since I was like 14 is ‘Melo’ (pronounced ‘Me-low’. So many people pronounce it as ‘Mello’ lmao). Mel is also a common nickname I get at work and such.

Question 2: Gender

Female She/Her

Question 3: Star sign

Ok I’m a nerd for Star signs so I’ll give a more detailed answer than necessary

Virgo ♍️ || 150-180 degree || The element associated with Virgo is Earth || The type of Earth I am is mutable || The planet associated with Virgo is Mercury || I’m most romantically compatible with a Taurus, Capricorn and Scorpio || I’m least romantically compatable with a Gemini, Aquarius and Sagittarius || My opposite star sign is Pisces || Traits of Virgos, they are Kind, Reliable, Patient, Loyal, Idealistic, Overthinking, Shy, Critical and sometimes Stubborn

Obviously this isn’t all Virgos so take this with a grain of salt but yeah just a little in-depth analysis.

Question 4: Height

168cm | 5’6 feet

Question 5: Time

My Timezone is AEDT. Right now as I’m posting this it’s 10PM 23rd December 2020

Question 6: Birthday

31st August 1999

Question 7: Favorite bands

Imagine Dragons, OneRepublic, Major Lazor, Fall Out Boy, X Ambassadors, Galantis, The Chainsmokers, The Script and Coldplay

Question 8: Favorite Solo Artists

Ellie Goulding, Ariana Grande, Khalid, Logic, Nicki Minaj, Sia, Marshmello, David Guetta, Lauv, Eminem, Dj Snake, Kendrick Lamar, Post Malone

Question 9: Current song stuck in my head

Hmmmm atm it’s definitely ‘fire meets gasoline’ by sia cause our boi Pedro is in the music video 👀

Question 10: Last Movie watched

The Santa Clause Trilogy lmao

Question 11: Last show

The Mandalorian to absolutely no ones surprise

Question 12: When did I create this blog

Oh jeez idek sometime in 2018 I think. I only really started to blog since watching S2 of the Mandalorian though. Needed to vent somehow lmao

Question 13: When Do I post

Same reason as above when I need to vent or when I feel strongly about something and feel confident enough to vocalise it which is very rare.

Question 14: Last Google

Ok for this I’m going to bend it a bit cause my recent searches is to do with Christmas gift buying and that’s boring. So I’m going to go with ‘Triple Frontier’. Cause a certain someone is in this movie 👀

Question 15: Other blogs

Nope this is my one and only!

Question 16: Do I get asks

Oh god no I’m not that cool lolllll

Question 17: Why I chose my url

It’s a combination of my nickname ‘Melo’ and my last name ‘Beesley’.

Question 18: Following Count

Question 19: Follower Count

Question 20: Average hours of sleep

Sleep? Wtf is sleep? I do not know of this sleep. As an insomniac and a night owl (I know double whammy) I don’t get much sleep at all maybe 5-6 hours if I’m lucky. My sleep is very broken, so I usually wake up like 2-3 times during the night. I try to go to bed at 11 and I usually wake up at 7 which I absolutely hate. I’m NOT a morning person at all. It’s worse cause it’s daylight savings rn so the sun is up at 5am. I swear I don’t know how I function sometimes.

Question 21: Lucky number

I don’t really have one???? I guess if I had to pick it would be.....54! thank you random number generator

Question 22: Instruments

Not really sure what this is referring to. If it’s referring to instruments I’ve played then the only one I can say is I played to recorder when I was like 7 and it was forced by my teacher so it doesn’t really count.

If it’s referring to my favourite instrument then probably an acoustic guitar. I love me some acoustic covers. Plus there’s so much variety with this instrument it can be both upbeat and happy or really slow and somber. It’s all around a just a great instrument.

Question 23: What I’m wearing

It’s night and it’s summer so just some shorts and a singlet. Anything more and I’ll die from drowning my own sweat.

Question 24: Dream Job

My dream job is to be a voice actor. Key word dream. My realistic dream job however is to become a pathologist.

Question 25: Dream Trip

Ohhhhhh boy I have so many places I wanna go to! My first priority would be the UK (England and Ireland specifically). Nearly all of my heritage is from there so I think it would be really cool to go back to my roots amd explore the culture my family is from.

Second on my list is America not too sure about all the states I want to go to but I know for a fact that California, Nevada, Wyoming, Montana, Texas (cause of N.A.S.A) and New York is a must!

Third is literally any Spanish speaking country whether it be Spain, Mexico, Colombia or Chile. Just anywhere that Spanish is the primary language.

Paris and Italy would be a solid fourth

Norway, Sweden and Finland would be fifth

Japan is 6th

I’m not really interested in visiting Africa, Indonesia the Middle East or Asia (except for Japan) and I wasn’t interested in South America either until recently.

Question 26: Favorite Food

I’m a sucker for pasta and Italian food! Ravioli in particular. It’s been my favourite since I was little. Chocolate is another big one. Any chocolate with caramel in it I will swipe from you.

I can’t do spicy foods I’m so intolerant to it like even the mild stuff makes my face go red and my tongue go numb it’s ridiculous.

Question 27: Nationality

Australian

My ancestry however is British/Irish/Ashkenazi Jewish. 75% Irish, 18% British, and 7% Jewish with less than 1% French and German.

Question 28: Favorite Songs

I get too personally invested in my music SMH

1800-273-8255 | Logic, Alessia Cara and Khaild

First Time | Kygo, Ellie Goulding

Treat You Better | RÜFÜS DU SOL

All the stars | Kendrick Lamar, SZA

Runaway | Galantis

breathin | Ariana Grande

Ocean Drive | Duke Dumont

Powerful | Major Lazor

lovely | Billie Eilish, Khalid

Let you down | NF

Elastic Heart, Fire meets gasoline, Big girls cry amd chandelier | Sia

Capsize | FRENSHIP, Emily Warren

Question 29: Last Book

Like physical book??? Oh lord I legit have no clue. I think the last time I read a physical book was in high school for English don’t ask what it was cause I have no idea lollll

Question 30: Top 3 Fictional Universes I want to live in

Miraculous, Star Wars, Assassins Creed

Annnnnnnd that’s it I’m done I guess! As for the 20 people I’m supposed to tag that’s just too high of a number there’s no way I have that many friends 😂. So I’ll only tag a few and if you don’t want to do this, just ignore 💜 See ya later!

@littlemisspascal @razordest @thisisthe-wayson

#personal

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onisiondrama · 5 years

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12/8/19 Livestream Part 1

I’m going to continue calling his supporters “Patreons” for now even though his Patreon was terminated. Idk what else to call them lol.

Notes:

The beginning is cut off. It seems Greg and his Patreons are frustrated because someone said something about a mole or a pedophile? Greg wants this person banned.

Greg says people think if that say the same things over and over that makes it true. His Patreons agree. The example he gives is “guy only fucks adults, if we say he fucks not adults that’ll change reality.” He says that’s not how reality works.

A Patreon says that person paid to come there and say that, so who’s the loser here? Greg says everyone and his Patreons agree.

Greg says someone emailed him trying to become his bro. He says people think if they fake being nice to him he’ll open up to them. He says this guy said he and Greg are better than everyone, thinking that would relate to Greg. Greg says he replied “everyone’s shit”. Greg says this guy said “if you don’t admit what you are things are going to get really bad for you” and Greg replied “ok boomer” and the guy complimented his roast.

Greg said he posted something to his Prime twitter, but he deleted it because it was too much of a bummer.

Greg says he only had one person say he was smaller than they expected. He says he’s just under 6 feet.

Greg asks his Patreons what happened to that guy that went on Keemstar’s show and allegedly admitted to sexually texting 15 year olds. His Patreons are trying to figure out who he’s talking about. Greg says he doesn’t know who he is, but he still has his Youtube.

Someone asks if it was Bashurverse. Greg says no and asks what he was accused of. A Patreon says Bashur had sex with his friend’s sister who was a year younger than him and it was brought up years later. Greg is surprised and explains the Romeo and Juliet laws. Greg says he remembers when he was 21 he wasn’t sure, so he didn’t fuck with it. (um at that point Greg was married to Skye since he was 19..?)

Someone says in the UK you can fuck anyone when you’re 16. Greg says in America if you’re mean to a 16 year old you’re a predator. Everyone laughs. Someone says Greg said she was super into him and says they would be mean to her too. Greg says he doesn’t know what people have said. He says he doesn’t keep up with it because people say so many things about him he can’t keep up. He says this is why he compared himself to Eminem. A Patreon suggests he should make a song. Greg says he made a distrack and another song about everything, but he didn’t like them. His Patreons encourage him to keep trying.

Greg says he’s grossed out by human interactions, he specifies romantic interactions. He says he’s been listening to Nigahiga on Smosh Anthony and Anthony said he has anxiety about dating anybody because he’s afraid he’ll be #meetoo’d because he hurt someone’s feelings. Greg says that’s what he means. He says when you get to know people and when you tell them to fuck off they can say whatever they want about you and they can get huge clout for it.

Greg says there’s been people who have said shit about him and he doesn’t know who they are. He says there’s no winning. He says there was a chick he asked to be his camera man. She never came out, but she was considering it. She randomly exposed him one day and it was so weak everyone forgot about her. (I think this was Macncheese?) He says the same thing happened with Vix. He asked if they know Vix. Someone asked who Vix was. He says he asked Vix to be his camera person and she randomly exposed him. He said her example of him being inappropriate was him asking her if she wanted to play smash bros. Greg says he just wanted to play because it was fun but she was trying to say he wanted to fuck her. His Patreons are agreeing with Greg. He says this is why you never heard of these people, their shit was so weak everyone’s like “fuck you”.

He goes back to the guy on Keemstar. He says the guy admitted he talked to the girls, but it was a long time ago. He says that’s what they all say, that it was a long time ago and they changed. He said it was only two years ago.

A Patreon says Bashur was young when that happened, he was 18. Greg says Bashur overreacted then. The Patreon says he thinks Bashur cried on camera for attention. Greg and his Patreons can’t agree if he quit Youtube or not. Greg searches Bashur and laughs that the first result was asking if he killed himself and the second was what happened to him.

A Patreon finds a channel and mistakes it for Bashur’s. Another Patreon points out their first video is a pedophile compilation of Bashur. Greg is upset they’re calling him a pedo for a one year age gap. The Patreon says he thinks it was a one year age gap, but he’s not sure. The Patreson comes back and says the girl was younger. He was 18 and she was 16. Greg says that’s an average high school relationship.

He asks if anyone gets that a pedophile gets prepubescent shit. He says he saw someone use the word to describe someone that was 20 who dated an 18 year old. His Patreons are shocked. He says people don’t respect the word and they don’t know what it means. A Patreon says that’s taking away from the actual issues. Greg agrees, says when you talk shit and say wolf for so long no one’s going to believe you. That’s why you don’t lie. A Patreon says this is how she feels about his controversies. Greg says people hated him since he started making videos and when people hate you enough they’ll believe anything they want to.

Greg says Dahvie Vanity is next on the hit list. Greg asks if he went to prison. A Patreon explains Dahvie was sleeping with underage girls. Greg says Marilyn Manson half admitted to doing something like that in an interview. Greg asks why would he say that? Greg says he believes most rock stars haven’t ID’d people.

A Patreon says Dahvie was also abusive. Greg sarcastically says everyone’s abusive after the relationship doesn’t work out.

Greg says Dahvie texted him because Greg was giving him shit on Youtube. Greg says it’s ironic what’s happening now because he (Greg) used to be a whistle blower on his channel. (lmao he was not. He just talked about people that were already outed.) He says he did it on Veeoneeye, Dahvie, and Social Repose cheating. He says it wasn’t fun for him, to take stories that may or may not be true and ask himself and his audience if they’re true. He says it’s a shitty career field and he doesn’t know why people would want to do that for a living.

He continues with the Dahvie story. He said Dahvie texted him asking him to hang out and Greg asked why he would want to hang out with him, the Dahvie said you can’t talk shit because you don’t know the truth. Greg says he’s accused of sleeping with adults and Dahvie was arrested and slept with people that were 15.

Greg said someone came out and said they saw Dahvie going back with someone of that age. He says it was a band mate, not Jeffree Star. Greg finds what Jeffree tweeted about Dahvie and reads it out. Greg is surprised to learn Dahvie made songs about being a predator.

Greg says he doesn’t have a position on Dahvie because he’d be taking part in malice, having the intent to hurt someone and he could get sued. It’s dangerous. A Patreon says unless you have evidence. Greg says you can’t have malice, you can’t have a goal of destroying someone’s life. If you want justice you go to the cops, if you want to destroy someone’s life that’s malice. He says people find that out in court. He says Elon Musk went to court for calling someone a “pedo guy” and the court found he didn’t fit the requirements in court because apparently “pedo guy” is something they say in South Africa. He says he got off because he deleted his tweet right away and didn’t try to go on a campaign to destroy the guy’s life. Greg says he would have let him off anyway because it was just one tweet. A Patreon explains the Elon situation and Greg agrees Elon was kind of an asshole in that situation, but says overall Elon is great because he’s a leader for us to go back into space and helping us progress as a society. And he’s helping save the planet “with cars and shit.”

A Patreon says Elon’s banging a musician. Greg says he wouldn’t bang anyone if he was Elon because he’d be afraid of shit going down later. He’d get a sex doll. “Don’t get into human relationships. They’re very complicated.” He says when you break up with someone they often suddenly think you’re a monster and your life is fucked. Unless you don’t break up with people and settle. A patreon says “stayin’ for the kids” jokingly and Greg repeated it and laughed.

Greg says there was multiple times where he was afraid of being in the same house as someone. He said when he ended the relationship he felt like they were going to end his life. A Patreon starts saying she felt like that with her ex, but Greg interrupts her to talk about himself more. He say it sounds like a sheet of aluminum foil 70% in the back of your head and spine. It’s inside you crinkling and it’s ice cold. It’s from the top of your head to your shoulders. He said that’s the feeling he gets when he thinks someone is going to kill him. Greg says he also gets a weird feeling in the back of his chest.

His Patreons talk about VR Chat among themselves. One of them says she built a computer so she can play VR. Greg in a mocking tone say “I built a computer.” Another Patreon asks her if she really built a computer. Greg asks him if he’s actually impressed by that. He says yeah and Greg asks him he he knows how legos work. Greg tells him to build his own computer, you just need a drill and some screws.

Greg says he remembers getting a reaction to coffee. His heart was pounding and his body felt weird, but then he realized it was decaf.

He and his Patreons discuss Youtube for a bit, like what ads are allowed where. Greg says PewDiePie had full frontal titties in his video and Greg complained to Youtube, “if he can do it why can’t I?” After he complained, PewDiePie’s content was age restricted. He thought some Youtubers were immune and it was unfair, but it was just corporations. He says Youtubers don’t have a lot of power.

Greg says people diagnose him with stuff. The most popular one is Narcissism. Some Patreons say they’ve seen that. Greg says they’ve been saying that since he started Youtube. He says when you have a job that’s about yourself, a Youtuber, don’t you have to have it? His Patreons agree. Greg says people put themselves in videos when they don’t have to, like unboxing videos. Someone says they’re branding themselves. Greg says they should just wear a mask and his Patreons agree.

A Patreon asks if Greg is going to make “I’m a Pickle” Rick and Morty version. Greg says he wants to and he has a pickle costume. There are intense mixed reaction from his patreons lol. A Patreon jokes that you have to have a high IQ to watch Onision. Greg says you don’t just have to have a high IQ, you have to have good deduction skills. The Patreon tries to explain her joke. Greg says he gets the joke, but he was serious. He says you need intense deduction skills to be a fan of him. Or you have to be a fan of Ted Bundy because that’s what the internet portrays him as. He says to most people he’s either Ted Bundy or a person that’s bombarded with intense bullshit.

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