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#Eve n god this female is not yet rated
calilili · 1 year
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"The working class artist is 'canary in the coal mine' of culture. She represents the free-spirit in everyone. Going forward, I believe, we will all find out, that the shortest distance between the artist + her audience, will save mother earth, because the artist holds together the fabrics of culture, society, humanity + civilization. My work seeks to nourish + strengthen our 'cultural immune system' against threats to democracy + freedom. Please Support My Team. "©calilili™
”   The working class artist is ‘canary in the coal mine’ of culture. She represents the free-spirit in everyone.  Today’s increasingly authoritarian, indentured servitude economies where even ‘the arts’ enable 1-Percenters in earning obscene profits, leaving working class artists out in the cold of newly de-professionalized systems with shredded standards, was preceded by the gutting of the…
” The working class artist is ‘canary in the coal mine’ of culture.
She represents the free-spirit in everyone.
Today’s increasingly authoritarian, indentured servitude economies where even ‘the arts’ enable 1-Percenters in earning obscene profits, leaving working class artists out in the cold of newly de-professionalized systems with shredded standards, was preceded by the gutting of the indie artist.
My work seeks to nourish + strengthen our ‘cultural immune system’ against threats to democracy + freedom.
However – it’s up to each and every one of us – to “vote for ourselves” in all of this.
The parallels with actual “voting” for public service – are quite palpable. Each vote for a public servant, is a vote for or against ourselves.
It’s up to us – to choose humanity. To Choose to support artists, instead of corporations posing as such.
Going forward, I believe, we will all find out, that the shortest distance between the artist + her audience, will save mother earth, because the artist holds together the fabrics of culture, society, humanity + civilization.
Excerpts by © Cali Lili
“Makin’ a Livin’ Not a Killin’ ™
My Oscars 2020 Contender Indie Film and Original Soundtrack
“eVe N’god this female is not yet rated ™ ”
from my Sustainable, Green, Upcycled Tiny feMt0™studi0
Copyright Excerpts by © Cali Lili all rights reserved.
“Imagine being a poor kid who’s core joy in life, is the creation of something beautiful and then finding out that the rich kids can show up to steal your creations and claim them as their own ? “
Before the Covid-19 pandemic I wrote much of the text-collage below as a “compilation” of excerpts from my writings.
Upon re-reading it – I am viscerally struck by many eerily prescient statements, including my mention of the “cultural immune system” – which is not an unusual reference for me, but it’s got special resonance now.
Imagine – being a poor kid who’s core joy in life, is the creation of something beautiful and then finding out that the rich kids can show up to steal your creations and claim them as their own ?
I’m a numbers challenged poor-kid artist who worked to get an “A” in my College Economy class, yet – never expected ‘economics’ would become so key to the art and sustainable humanities – work I was born to do.
Now, it seems almost fitting that “economics” in the context of art-making should become a focus. True artists are ‘not in it for the money,’ we are driven by an other-worldly ‘calling’ yet we DO have to survive + we do face commercial and other ” vampires.” So much ego, jealousy and competition obstructs the work, especially in the era of “corporate art” and also – “amateur art” – in which “everybody is a celebrity and therefore nobody is authentic.” Time and focus become even more precious and reaching the audience, becomes more challenging in the context of so many distractions.
I want to make clear that I’m not just slamming big budget productions or corporations — they employ many people and are a very important part of the “economic landscape” – the “economic eco-system.”
But like all eco-systems – balance is key.
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Just as the “big fish” get to swim big in the big ocean … – so too, must my tiny productions be nurtured, supported by the industry, the economy ( the big ocean ) and diverse audiences, just as my work as an artist – should be nurtured by elders, producers, directors, fellow artists through quality acting jobs in the larger economic arena – without being mutually exclusive, or – damn near impossible without “the right connections.”
Where we have arrived in the current imbalance of the economic eco-system of the entertainment industry – is, like the imbalances leading to climate-crisis, endanger species – so too, does the imbalance in our industry ( and I dare-say many other big money driven industries ) threaten the artist as an endangered species.
Things don’t have to stay the same.
There are ironies evident during the current pandemic. One of the ironies we recently noticed, involves several entertainment venues that were cold, indifferent, callous, arrogant – and even cruel – to young artists like myself, just starting out with fresh projects – who are now actually begging US to write to OUR government representatives – asking US to ask that OUR tax-dollars go toward bailing THEM out!
Some of these venues – even go so far as to “pose” as “mom and pop” operations, which for me is a huge irony as I have been advocating the return of the “mom and pop ” economy with my “MomNPopUpShopZ™ ” moniker but I CERTAINLY would not call these “outfits” anywhere NEAR the kind of “AuthenticIndie™” that takes place at my studio.
Really now, the height of hypocrisy – to write to artists whose dreams you tried to crush – asking for a bailout ?
But that’s actually the environment our culture has enabled, via the “Gentrified Economy ” we’ve been enduring – that led to the literal “gentrification” of our very “culture” – which in its purest form is the physical expression, embodiment of the “soul” of the people.
Like those who “vote against themselves” by voting for politicians that work for the 1% richest echelon of their district, while getting the 99% to believe they deserve poverty – there has been an apathetic acceptance by too many of us – that those who literally absconded with our resources are somehow “endowed” with forms of “entitlement” based upon the size of their bank accounts – even if those numbers were not quite ethically attained.
It’s a “Stockholm Syndrome” of some sort.
If we don’t free ourselves from this unhealthy cycle, we will continue to enable the very abuses of power that got us here in the first place – massive inequality with the 1 Percenters getting bailed out even as they continue to suck every ounce of resources from the rest of us.
Witness the Covid-19 Circumstances : most renters are not able to leave the house to work … and yet … many of the larger landlords just got bailed out in various ways … but the renters STILL OWE THE RENT.
How does that make sense ?
It just doesn’t.
I believe the “economic eco-system” in the “arts and culture” professions, too often intertwined in a symbiotic fashion with what’s known as “the entertainment industry” – which dangerously includes ” news ” now … – CAN be nurtured back to health – if we can find enough consensus among the wide range of artists from the fat-cats – to the tiny fish like me.
I DO believe that if the George Clooneys / Tom Hanks’s / Amy Adams’s / Meryl Streeps – types – now including the “star news anchors” – and “star pundits” – could someday consider what I am proposing – we could create a far more humane – healthy – AND ethically lucrative industry.
For one thing, true actors, musicians, artists and technicians alike – could communicate directly with potential future collaborators – directors / producers etc … – without the excruciating and humiliating obstructions currently in place. There could be some continuity such as that which I describe in my “HighSchoolMeetsOldSchool™” concept – where people at every stage of their careers and lives – move forward without being tossed into the trash. If we continue to support “disposable culture” – we will continue to be treated as “disposable people.”
It’s literally an insane system right now – the height of gentrification – and unapologetically so – with pecking orders reminiscent of high-school cliques that never had to grow up because they were enabled into becoming their own industry clique.
We are supposed to just “accept” the hierarchy – people whose films or music are just – not that great, didn’t even earn much at the box office – but were “in the club” so they were therefore – “better” than actual working class artists putting out quality projects … ? People were silent – nobody could speak out in this environment or – that age-old threat : “you’ll never work in this town again became a reality.”
How SICK is that ? Very. It’s literally, a virus – one that reflects the larger gentrified economy but is magnified by its rare surroundings.
Covid-19 is exposing all kinds of realities.
‘Why is backing my working-class-artist – work – a worthy / valuable investment ?’
That’s the question I posited for one of my upcoming books.
It was also supposed to be included in IndieGoGo / Patreon campaigns, but we found platforms like those, to be somewhat antithetical to the main purpose of this essay and the undertaking as a whole. I hope as you read on, you might see why.
Having said that – we need and appreciate your support.
We are expressing this outside of forums such as “IndieGoGo” ” GoFundMe” or “Patreon” for a variety of reasons, including those mentioned, but also because this work is done on a professional basis – and it is only by virtue of an “illness” in the industry – that we are forced to communicate outside the norms of the industry – directly to you – our partner in the sharing of culture AND in what I am outlining as a future for an ” INTEGRATED” and “INTERDEPENDENT” awareness for culture and economy.
Like athletes, we train – and train – and train – and we get injured, take losses, have to recover – and there are a billion different adjustments and daily practices that must take place before a performance of excellence is accomplished.
Also like athletes, we inspire and uplift.
But there is an added – urgency – to supporting work like mine. My films, music and writings, have not blithely worn blinders in the name of “entertainment” at the expense of culture. My work takes responsibility for recognizing – that what we release into the “bloodstream” of our culture, our society, the minds of our sisters and brothers – will impact our globe and precious wildlife. sealife – the very water and air – in some small or large way.
We haven’t taken the easy route, just napping our way into the public arena to collect profits and ego strokes.
We care.
I care.
I REALLY care, sometimes to the detriment of my own peace of mind and wellness. But I work on that too – and I also have a wellness project in the works that I look forward to sharing with you.
I guess what I am saying is – while I don’t believe in “tribalism” ( see my professional bio ) I DO believe in the power of our collective “global village.” That’s who I am working for – that’s “my tribe” – US.
Below are excerpts from my ‘meditations,’ stream of consciousness attempts at a response :
The artist is ‘canary in the coal mine’ of culture. She represents the free-spirit in everyone. Today’s increasingly authoritarian, indentured servitude economies where even ‘the arts’ enable 1-Percenters in earning obscene profits, leaving working class artists out in the cold of newly de-professionalized systems with shredded standards, was preceded by the gutting of the indie artist. My work seeks to nourish + strengthen our ‘cultural immune system’ against threats to democracy + freedom.
Going forward, I believe, we will all find out, that the shortest distance between the artist + her audience, will save mother earth, because the artist holds together the fabrics of culture, society, humanity + civilization.
Please join my movement : ‘SupportTheARTSustainTheARTIST™’ ©
Here’s why :
My concerns for global culture were quite intense before this pandemic … but of course, like everything else – we are at full throttle now – high gear – but hopefully, not so high that we “throttle” ourselves :
” I am experiencing the 21st Century – intensely –
While daunting, sometimes harrowing, always challenging – I believe – it’s an opportunity for us to : “Make Up A Better World.”
I’m an actress/director + singer/songwriter so I work with “ stories,” employing design, rhythm and shape as building blocks.
The expression “making up a better world” unfolds into a multitude of meanings. “Making Up” can mean – hand-made – fabricating stories as I do at my green sustainable studio, it can mean wearing literal “make-up” and – it can also mean – resolving an argument … “mending a tear in the fibers of a culture.”
That’s what I aim to do with my projects – to nourish and “mend” as I contribute to the “woven” fabric of a culture showing some “wear and tear.”
As an authentically independent : “TruliIndie™” artist, I’ve come to realize that maintaining an authentically “indie” status holds the same challenges that we as “individuals” face in an increasingly “corporate” world dominated by a “ Cultural Industrial Complex.” That’s a phrase I’m paraphrasing from the well-known expression “ Military Industrial Complex “ – illustrating how the same form of “corporate takeover” can be applied to culture. That’s dangerous and it renders the “Indie Artist” working outside of Corporate Media – and “Endangered Species.” It now occurs to me, that there is also a “Medical Industrial Complex” – that does not put patient safety above public relations or profits.
But here’s the thing – the reason I think you might consider caring about my work :
Just as the non-corporate tethered artist “works without a net” – going forward into the 21st Century : every free-thinking individual – daring to decline, oppose, disagree with, not become dependent upon a corporate entity – they too will increasingly become an “Endangered Species.”
The fallacy in assuming that only one group gets targeted by corporate domination – becomes evident daily as authoritarianism rises parallel with increasing reliance on Artificial Intelligence and continued indifference towards sustainable technologies to save our planet as “new planets” are sought for “expansion” of an old patriarchal model that is damn near destroying our “mother earth.” ( Re-reading this after covid-19 is shocking – because surely our economy will lean more toward AI as “non-contact” business seems to be a trend.)
My view is – just as we find ourselves at a time of great opportunity to reverse and amend the harmful advance of “climate change” – we also live in a time of great opportunity to assert the freedoms taken for granted by so many, who enjoy the democracy died for by so many and – to this day – longed for – by so many more.
A culture’s freedoms – the freedoms for everybody – are measured, expressed ( or suppressed ) in their purest form, upon examination of the “health” of it’s arts.
I’m going to repeat opening statements as they are beginning to feel like necessary “mantras” :
“Imagine being a poor kid who’s core joy in life, is the creation of something beautiful and then finding out that the rich kids can show up to steal your creations and claim them as their own ?
The artist is ‘canary in the coal mine’ of culture.
She represents the free-spirit in everyone.
Today’s increasingly authoritarian, indentured servitude economies where even ‘the arts’ enable 1-Percenters in earning obscene profits, leaving working class artists out in the cold of newly de-professionalized systems with shredded standards, was preceded by the gutting of the indie artist.
My work seeks to nourish + strengthen our ‘cultural immune system’ against threats to democracy + freedom.”
With your support, I can continue to prove that my Authentically Indie Movies, Albums and Books from my green, sustainable, non-corporate, studio – can remain “organic,” sustainable AND authentically free from corporate-speak, corporate-culture, corporate-cultural propaganda which so often include age-old biases such as misogyny, racism, homophobia and climate/nature denial.
If only the 1 Percent among us – make movies, write books and music that ever get “distributed” to the nation and the world … then – our very thoughts, dreams, hopes, wishes – our very brains become shaped forever by that group’s agenda.
We literally become ( or continue to be ) “indentured servants” of the 1 Percenter class in a profound way : our very imaginations, our language, the rhythm of our hearts beat – to the beat – of the drum, paid for by those who can afford to make the commercials and publish the glossy photos in Vogue, Teen Vogue, Esquire, The New York Times etc …
By some form of “Economic Eugenics” paid for by – we – ourselves, we will be contributing to the “natural selection “ of any truly quality ideas – literally stolen from ourselves – from Twitter, Pinterest and other mediums that working class artists and thinkers can afford to use to express ourselves, which are “spied upon” by the “interns” or publicists hired by the wealthy – who then appropriate those ideas into their mega-rich megaphones – claiming the genius as their own, even as the geniuses are left to die penniless, as they have often done throughout history.
If we continue to support / consume mostly corporate-media born from money worship, there will continue to be only two classes of artist – the Uber rich and the Uber poor and it will continue to spread to other fields of study, other corners of civilization.
But if we shift our economic values, make a concentrated, conscious effort to avoid “consuming” corporate media and an effort to “consume” more “ArtisanMadeMedia™ + Arts like mine – on a personal basis, supporting arts that are created by an individual artist in need of our support – and if we all – support EACH OTHER’S SMALL BUSINESSES – in a sort of “revival” of the “mom and pop“ businesses – what I call “Mom N’ Pop-Up ShopZ™ Economy” – then we can create a healthier “economic environment” – in the same way we can save our own “environment” from the harmful effects of consuming all the oil, gas and other products upon which the 1 percent grow fat – as the planet grows sick.
ReadTheIndieLabel™ WhatsInYourIndie™ :
Not all indies are created equal.
Many movies, albums, other projects and products have long ago appropriated the word “ Indie “ because it’s “cool.”
But often these are big budget, corporate – backed – deals.
That’s part of “what happened” to movies and music – they became all about the deals, not the movies, not the music, not the artists, or the audiences. They became about – the money – but those deals wanted it both ways. They wanted to appear “indie” – while still raking in obscene profits. There’s a reason these entities wanted to study our “tastes” a an audience via big tech.
Recently studios have cultivated a hobby – they slander American actors, claiming we don’t have the “skills” or discipline of actors from other countries.
Now – please know, I am in love with so many cultures. I am not speaking from some xenophobic point of view. I LOVE actors from all cultures. It’s the goddamn slander from studios that I am taking exception to.
If you’ll notice there are quite a few actors from other countries playing Americans. That might be fine, but I can assure you this has nothing to do with our skills or discipline. American actors are, becoming an endangered species. Why ? Money. Power. Money. This is the “money-ball” of movies and music.
Excerpt from Cali Lili’s opening statement in 2013 :
“ In Bob Fosse’s Film “Cabaret,” the Song “Money” (by Kander & Ebb)
chants … incants …
Something we might catch
running on the hamster-wheel
in our own heads …
“Money Makes the World Go Round
The World Go Round
The World Go Round
Money – Money – Money …”
… the song goes round …
“Money” … is what it takes to do many things …
DUH.
Especially … Making Films …
Double DUH.
But “Money” doesn’t “MAKE” … Anything.
And FILMS are MADE … by Hand(s) …
Albums too …” © Cali Lili 2013
Excerpted from my essay originally published in 2013 during the Cannes Film Festival – here’s the full essay :
MoneySez™ Movies4The99Percent™
© Cali Lili
https://calililiindies.com/2014/02/12/moneysez-…
My “client” is :
The Individual In EveryOne™
and
“KidsOfAllAges™
If we continue to support “Disposable Culture” then we will continue to be treated by our politicians and legislators like “Disposable Humans.”
I’m really worried about this and I have been, ever since I considered law as a career.
I decided that I could do more for the “global village” with my work as an artist and culture- “maker.”
I am “weaving” and “simmering” what I hope, could be “cures” to some of our ills – with my secret-sauces, based in love, kindness and respect.
I believe in making projects that help us “preserve” our “innocence” as though we are living in the “Summer” of our humanity’s harvest and we must make sure that every flavor is preserved in both seed form and in a cultural – “jar of preserves” – for the Winter. That Cultural Winter seems colder during Climate Change. ( Re-Reading this, post Covid 19 – is chilling ).
In 2012 when we first announced and advertised / listed the hiring of diverse inclusive team members on Craigs’ List – we saw many hate-filled, vicious, comments from racists, misogynists and homophobes who detested the fact that we asked for more “women, persons of color, LGBTQ community members to apply for the team positions.”
It was a shocking introduction into the kinds of cruelty we witness today.
It is with great pride, that we have released a project intended to heal, mend, balm and inspire us – in spite of such unkindness in the world.
One of the many mottos at my tiny studio is :
“The Chain of HumanKindness Is Stronger Than Our Weakest Links ™” ©
The projects I will introduce here are “HandMadeToMakeADifference™” ©
We work – with my methodology, stemming from a lifestyle philosophy rooted in yoga, zen and dance – which flows not only into my works of film, music, poetry but into the “works,” the workings – the “how” we can support each other instead of corporations.
Mind you, I don’t hate corporations, if they are pro-human. Humanity First.
This methodology born from experience is always on our minds and in our hearts. I hire teams of high quality crafts-persons, technicians and artisans to make each of these projects as a collectors’ item, not disposable fast-culture nor the plasticized packaging of a meme.
There is pain that accompanies the basic needs of an artist.
These are agonies most people aren’t aware of because most of our references, when we hear the word “artist” – is the slanderous examples of either the “crazy rich” or the “just plain crazy.”
In fact the life of an artist is both for more amazing and far more mundane than we might imagine – but still requires every ounce of dedication.
It’s not just a job, it’s a “calling” and that sounds romantic but truth be told – not everybody would even want to be “called” because it can be exhausting and it’s not really a choice.
If one is born this way – one must create.
But : “ imagine being a poor kid who’s core joy in life, is the creation of something beautiful and then finding out that the rich kids can show up to steal your creations and claim them as their own ? “
Media, tv, movies, social media are today’s public square, playground, and printing press.
They do “inform” us – but they also “shape” us.
Since there are no “ingredients labels” on the media we consume, we are literally “consuming” ideas, biases, and content ( which may be stolen from artists ) at our own risk, at the risk of the very fabric of our culture and civilization.
If we aren’t able to “sample” the more “whole foods,” artisanal, farm-to-table, versions of media, such as that which I make at my studio and which receive contributions from people like my local farmers, who contributed produce to my film set, then – we are abdicating our “food-for-thought-sourcing” and just “trusting” that “big media” knows what we should “consume.”
Every radio station, tv channel, including much of the “on demand” and streaming now – are backed by the very same big media who controlled three networks in years gone by. Same old same old.
If we don’t broaden our own “tastes” in arts and culture, as we did with “foodie” culture – where we discovered “sourdough” bread and artisanal cheeses, heirloom veggies and – VITAMINS … – we will be depriving our emotional, intellectual, spiritual and even physical well-being – of wellness opportunities as a culture.
We might be depriving ourselves of the innate “healing capacity” of our “Cultural Immune System” – the capacity to come together as a “Global Village” and solve problems like economic inequality, gun violence, health care, education, and environmental injustice / climate change.
If we deprive ourselves of our innate healing capacity to “think for our-selves” as individuals free from the shackles of corporate-think often laden with internalized bias, misogyny, racism, homophobia and science-denial – then we will have abdicated control over the “levers” of our minds, the minds of our children, the minds of future “leaders.”
Inevitably this abdication of “free will” – shapes, defines and controls Culture, collective and individual fears and hopes – channels our education – which in turn shapes future policies, laws – medicine – health , housing , food safety, personal safety … ( again, I’m re-reading this … in post-Covid-19 times – I’m quite amazed this was written before Covid)
We don’t have an ingredients label on our media – by that, I’m not referring to the ratings / reviews of content determined by the “Corporate cultural industrial complex” policing itself. What I mean by “ingredients list” is – asking questions with our newly found critical thinking / think-for-myself skills – asking questions like : “ who made it, how was it made, when I stream this movie / music am I supporting an indie artist not signed by a corporate fat-cat-copy-cat ? “
When my movie was complete, we sought to find “distribution” with a movie distributor known for “indie films.” We realized – after reading their policy which stated in public “ if we haven’t worked with you before, we won’t work with you now” – that every movie they distributed was “packaged” by one of the 1Percenter largest “Agencies” who cast only their own “1Percenters” and – in some cases, the Agencies were co-producing the movies with the 1Percenter studios / mini-majors.
Money Money Money.
SO MANY great actors, artists – were cast aside by such policies. If you are a cinephile, you know how many brilliant directors, actors, singers – artists were cast aside by those who bought the power to – “greenlight” or stop projects that might have employed some of the greatest artists.
I make ArtisanMadeMedia™ – just like home-made cookies fresh from the oven or organic fresh-picked vine-ripened fruit – my projects are “Organic” – we are not infused with a list of chemical ingredients one might find in a “store-bought” cookie – or chemical-sprayed Agribusiness GMO franken-fruit.
Here is one example : for actors, the “Breakdowns” mean everything.
In fact, the “Breakdowns” might actually represent the “breakdown” of actors’ abilities to seek quality, paying acting work without a high profile agency — and there-fore — they might represent – how the entertainment industry destroyed the American Actor.
The “Breakdowns” is a list of all the acting jobs available at any given time — paying projects, projects that represent the highest possible goals a working actor might attempt to achieve on any given day.
But most actors – cannot see them.
They are ONLY provided to agents.
How do you get an agent ? Get work that shows you are good at what you do.
How do you get work as an actor ? Get an agent – with access to the “Breakdowns.”
It’s an insane Catch 22
.
Is it legal ? Who knows. Who asks ?
If you ask – will you be barred from “ working in this town “ ?
Who knows. Who asks ?
Some of the industry avenues to whom I sent my indie movie “ eVe N’god this female is not yet rated “ ™© in my early attempts to find distribution. I was told that my movie was “too experimental”
Now my team and I witness the programming on those channels – which parallels every single theme addressed in my movie. Mainstream content is a double-edged sword to me + any other indie artist who “pitches” them a project. Big Media now appropriates the voice of the female creator, the person of color creator, the LGBTQ creator, the science-based creator … just as some charities of late have begun to appropriate the voices of small charities working for years to support their causes.
A large distributor recently produced a project with elements similar to mine – so somewhere in the dialogue of this century – I’ve got to ask : what did they do with my voice – when I pitched them my project — and when they told me it was “too experimental.” Well – one look at current programming — shows that my project would have fit perfectly with their current slate. It’s clear to us – that we didn’t know the right people, have the right agents, or contacts.
Seriously ?
Is THIS how we are going to continue to allow our “cultural story” to be written ? Are we going to continue to allow this culture to be run via insider trading and cliques ?
Will we allow ourselves to stay in high school forever ?
At what point – do “We The Creators” and “We The Audience” — collectively “ We The Global Village “ — get to communicate directly with each other — without the “middle-men” and “middle-women” — the gate-keepers — running interference ? At what point – do we simply : connect ?
I’d like that point to be – RIGHT NOW — and I invite you to please, join me and my team.
I’m a poet, so I appreciate complexity of emotion contained within the boundaries of simple structure.
Campaigns and business don’t always capture an “poetic essence” for any given venture.
But I’m going to try … because poetry is at the core of everything I do.
I hope the information included, provides some insight about me … –
But, I want to cut to the chase, before I include more links …
Enough about me, let’s talk about you.
I need your help.
Ever since I began my project, I knocked on the doors of 1 % ers in Hollywood – seeking support for the kinds of innovation I wanted to deliver to a Hollywood dinosaur environment that was weighed down by years of misogyny, sexism and many other ” isms ” – especially the “isms” that deal with cold-hard-cash.
After throwing myself wholeheartedly and quite humbly on the “mercy” of the establishment, I realized ( and was warned by some of the good guys ) that there my types of innovation were not wanted by a status quo environment working hard at keeping the profits steadily rolling in to the same people in power.
Aside from raising the money to make my movie and album – I needed to secure distribution – in order to create awareness of the project.
This was crucial, because this film and album were especially focused on helping those “coming out” in the global LGBTQ community – and offering emotional support, solace, sister-hood in the Womens’ Rights, Human Rights, Interracial Love and Climate Change / Ocean Conservancy communities world-wide –
It’s a project “For the People” but the establishment in the entertainment industry was barring us from any forms of distribution – it was literally what I call a ” Gentrification of Culture ™©” – to the extent that our “culture” is dictated by the 1% who barely experience the reality of – what it’s like to “make a living” and live in the making of – our culture !
I see now that I was a bit naive – distribution is THE HARDEST part of movie-making now that almost anybody can make a movie. I was outlining my work as combining what I call “ToyBoxTech™” with very highly skilled, high quality projects – so my work falls into a unique category.
We weren’t “high finance” enough for the big distributions – but we were not amateurs, we are pros – so there was no thought of simply dumping the project onto YouTube for free – that wasn’t the point.
The idea was to be TruliIndie™ without corporate over-lords.
The idea was about the “working class” in the entertainment world speaking to the “working class” in the audience’s world. After all – we really ARE experiencing the world together.
We don’t live in mansions, but we are hollywood professionals.
As I blogged during the making of this project, I realized that the TruliIndie™ artist / artisan ( especially in the entertainment world) was, like much of our wildlife, and like the independent thinker – an “Endangered Species.”
We are all : “Makin’ a Livin’ Not a Killin'” ™©
I refused to give up on my TinyMultiMedia™ and I forged ahead with making them as AquaCultureZ™ : like pearls, they would be formed slowly with tender loving care, as though they were grown in a ” pearl farm .”
Flash Forward :
The movie and album are complete, the graphic novel is on the way, and the next album and movie are in pre-production !
We invite audiences to “Sip TheOysterZ SavorThePearlZ™ “ © :
This first of many “FarmToTableFables™” was made with up-cycled wardrobe and film sets – in fact, several farmers, including female farmers from the farmers market, contributed produce and flowers for the film’s “Garden Of eVe ™ ” set dressing along with crew lunches !
So why am I bothering you with all this ?
Now that I made an authentically indie feature motion picture completely OUTSIDE ” the system ” – along with the Soundtrack / Debut Album – also as a rebel / renegade indie artist –
Now that we did get a tiny theatrical release in Downtown Los Angeles at the Downtown Independent Cinema
Now that the movie can be seen on Apple TV / iTunes, Google Play, and Vimeo World-Wide … and the Album / Soundtrack can be heard on Apple / iTunes and EVERYWHERE ELSE music is streamed / downloaded –
and now that our baby steps have somehow brought this little girl into the arena as an Oscars 2020 Contender – “though she may be little, she is fierce” – running with the Goliaths –
We need YOU
and YOU
and YOU –
and YOU TOO PLEASE …
How can you support us without us submitting to a somewhat “corporate” model at IndieGoGo and Patreon ?
Here’s How :
In addition to adding my album/soundtrack and singles – to all your playlists, whether it be Apple 🍎 or Spotify, YouTube or GooglePlay, Boomplay – Everywhere music streams –
🍎 iTunes / Apple TV Movie : https://itunes.apple.com/us/movie/eve-n-god-thi…
🍎 iTunes Soundtrack Apple Music
https://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/cali-lili/14…
After viewing and listening, please consider leaving us positive ratings / reviews – this is not only a supportive action toward our NEXT movie and album – it’s ALSO a push-back against sexist, homophobic, racist and climate-denying trolls who go out of their way to leave negative comments.
On Apple TV 🍎 🎬 iTunes 🎬 🍎
https://tv.apple.com/us/movie/eve-n-god-this-female-is-not-yet/umc.cmc.2yxdyr5yqcmhr1y1hn195e3sm
And Also at
YouTube Movies 🎬 and Music 🎶 :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mxgf1AeeWw4&list=PLOo3oJVjWZYTKa092ES4_ncFupWbjCKnt&index=3&t=0s
Google Play Movies and Music 🎬 🎶
https://play.google.com/store/movies/details/Eve_N_God_This_Female_is_Not_Yet_Rated?id=Mxgf1AeeWw4&hl=en_US
and
Vimeo WorldWide 🎬
Shopping our tee-shirts and swag at the store link 👕👚🧢
https://shop.spreadshirt.com/CaliLiliCiti/
And :
You can ALSO : add any TIPS 💸 you can afford —
to our virtual “tip jar” at my Bandcamp page –
🎶 💸 🎶 https://calililiindies.bandcamp.com/
The Bandcamp page is where you can “pay more” for each track available there ( we are adding more tracks there ! my schedule was full before Covid-19 and – it’s been overwhelming, as you already know from your own life ) –
The “tips” added at Bandcamp go directly to my studio and – they go toward my next social justice / environmental justice themed projects – all of which lean towards women’s rights, lgbtq rights, black lives matter, and – ocean conservancy / sea-life.
Those “tips” are the very same one might add toward any service for a job well done – but they are also “wrighting a wrong” done to artists by a culture that favors “corporate art” over the same kind of art one might find in a painters’ private studio.
SEE the movie – if you enjoy it – please leave a heart-felt and descriptive positive review – then share it with ten or more people
HEAR the Soundtrack / Album – if you enjoyed it – please add to your playlists everywhere – leave a positive descriptive review – share it with ten or more –
We Need YOU –
to Help Us Get this project out there – to DISTRIBUTE IT – without those power broker distributors who literally boast about never working with anybody not recommended by cronies –
Aside from aspiring to entertain and inspire with this piece – my aim was to “nourish” – it really was made from the heart – in order to share ideas and solace with those who may need to hear the message of love, acceptance, diversity, inclusivity, interracial unity, kindness, and hope …
Culture should not be “gentrified” – exclusive by the 1 % – or it will turn sour and harm the very people consuming it.
Culture must be made “of the people, by the people, for the people.”
That is what this movie and album are literally “made from.”
If we can get this movie and album OUT THERE with your help :
” For the People” – “distributed” not by means of hollywood dominance but in the same grassroots manner in which it was : “ Hand-Made-To-Make-A-Difference™ “ – by the people – for the people – of the people.
and WE HAVE SWAG !
Band Tees / Movie Tees featuring lyrics from the songs and mottos / themes from the studio are also available in high quality, fairly made ( some are organic ) SWAG !
Please Join My Movement :
Dream Big Tiny FootPrintZ™ ©
SupportTheARTSustainTheARTIST™ ©
Some “Bits About Me” :
QUOTE :
“I’m still that teenage runaway with a scholarship … I earned a Masters’ Degree from NYU, but no high school diploma … “
It’s true ! I got skipped several grades and – then scholarships, so I found myself as a kid – in Graduate School with fellow “peers” / “students” who were already university professors in other countries, studying at NYU ! Surreal !
I survived an abusive childhood mainly because I ADORE the ARTS … all I ever wanted to do – was create beauty in order to make the world a better place.
My teachers were angels and I am eternally grateful. I am not sure I was quite “conscious” of all the “grade-skipping” … I just knew that I needed to arrive – here and NOW.
I “caught a wave” for Cali – because I figured my name was a good hint and having been born on the water – I needed to be – water. My “temple” is my daily time surfing the Pacific before going to work at my tiny, hand-built, sustainable, biodegradable, green studio.
A note about my studio :
I designed this eco-structure in high-school, never really knowing if it would ever get built. I was lucky to have connected with my partner and long story short – it was built and i was up and running – on my “half a shoestring budget” from my baby-sitting money, yoga-teacher earnings and actress earnings. I found my first few team members, and went to work.
I’m enclosing a bit of my formal professional bio below, since it’s the most comprehensive way I could think of, to introduce myself :
2019 Interview https://medium.com/@mondofilm/interview-with-ca…
2017 Interview http://www.wearemovingstories.com/we-are-moving…
Twitter https://twitter.com/CaliLiliIndies
Official Website CaliLiliIndies.com https://calililiindies.com/
iTunes / Apple TV Movie : https://itunes.apple.com/us/movie/eve-n-god-thi…
iTunes Soundtrack
https://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/cali-lili/14…
IG https://www.instagram.com/calililiindies/
Facebook Movie page https://www.facebook.com/EVEnGodThisFemaleIsNot…
Facebook Band page
https://www.facebook.com/calililiband/
Cali Lili :
Professional Biography by GTA Management :
” Actress-Director / Singer-Songwriter Cali Lili skipped several grades (having been tested as reading at college level in grade school) took her first college course in the entire works of Shakespeare, at age 13, never graduated high-school, never even went to a prom, was swooped up, landing at NYU, then completed her Masters’ Degree on full scholarship with awards / stellar reviews for early works.
The Cali Lili ™ Band recorded a completely original stand-alone “Urban / World / Rock © ” styled Singer-Songwriter Debut Album which forms the core of the soundtrack for her debut feature film :
‘eVe N’god(TM) this female is not yet rated ™’
She made the feature length narrative motion picture with an ALL FEMALE production team.
‘eVe N’god this female is not yet rated ™ ‘ is perhaps, the first ( or one of the first ) production of it’s kind : a theatrical feature length motion picture, in which the technical production roles employed only women during principal photography.
Born of multi-cultural heritage, Cali is keenly aware and concerned with what she sees as a form of “tribalism” too often employed as “nationalism.” Cali writes about these issues and acts accordingly when it comes to her public image.
Cali adores being an actor and takes that craft very seriously, but found herself turning down 3 acting offers, that she felt were disempowering to women especially in the MeToo environment, in order to “turn up” what she calls fempower™ by scraping together “half a shoestring budget” to build her “green” “off-grid,” upcycled “floating” “surfshack” feMt0™ studi0 at the Venice Beach Canals in Los Angeles, California where she makes “Signature” Sustainable, Green Auteur Artisanal Motion Pictures, Albums and Books, “HandMade2MakeADifference™”
Cali’s degree included extensive studies in anthropology as well as performance techniques from all over the globe. She holds an added background of intense New York studies in dance / choreography.
Cali is proud to share her deep connection with “Mother Africa” + “Mother Ocean.” She is greatly inspired by African culture, the cultures of Oceania, and that of her other diverse intercultural studies.
Cali’s quote :
“We all originate from one mother in Africa, the Ocean is our collective unconscious, so let us honor each other, our mutual mother, our waters, and our blue mothership, earth. In doing so, we save ourselves “©
Cali’s films are inclusive of lgbtq characters and the authentic real lives of these characters. She also delves into the reality of “being female” and a “multi-cultural blend” who “appears to be white,” in a biased “MeToo” world.
Cali’s career in movies began as a teenager, flying back and forth from NY to LA, while working as an “au pair.”
As a kid, she “raised herself” in spite of an abusive childhood
With legendary ‘Edward G. Robinson (I)’ (qv) as one of the distinguished members of her ancestry, Cali dedicates herself to honoring a tradition of excellence and earning her “place” as an up-and-coming young artist.
She has been granted the rights to the favorite novel of legendary ‘Zane Grey (I)’ (qv) by Grey’s son Loren Grey ( writer and educator) for a film adaptation in which she will co-star.
Zane Grey was a very outspoken novelist – who cared deeply about wildlife and culture. Cali has much in common with Mr. Grey’s concerns for our planet, which is why she is aligned with this project.
Cali works with her proprietary methodologies as described in her book “The Declaration of IndiePenDance”™
In the past, Cali previously worked in a collaboration agreement deal with Academy Award winning Dutch producer, ‘Hans de Weers’ (qv) (Antonia’s Line) which ended when Cali realized it was time to build her own tiny studio, in order to make projects that empower Women, LGBTQIA , Civil Rights and Climate Science communities.
Her wish is to continue sharing her heart with the hearts of the beautiful fans she hears from, daily.
We here at GTA Management, hope you will take some time to support her works.
( GTA Management Biographies )
***
Cali’s band page statement :
“Inventing new worlds with my art, saved my childhood.
Dancin’ pavement on NYC streets, I learned my craft comforted by the shelter of my Pictures, Words Music In Motion™
I’m a Multi-Cultural “Island Child Wild ™ In The City ” so I caught a wave 4 Cali.
My music?
It’s eclectic, island child wild™
@CaliLiliCiti™
SurF Tribe, Indigenous City RockVibe™
VenusBeach™
Cutting Edge Of The Pacific™”
***
The Cali Lili Indies™ Brand is a “Destination” ;
Aspiring to Inspire + Empower™
‘ The Sexy Part of Smart™© “
***
© Cali Lili™
Cali Lili Indies™™
Pictures
Words
Music
In Motion ™
femt0™studi0‍♀️
VenusBeach™
c.lili.IslandGirlZCulturePearlZ™ CuttingEdgeOfThePacific™
IslandChildWild™
INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY WARNING :
These Intellectual Properties / MultiMedia / Written Documents are Signature © Copyright Trademark Proprietary Intellectual Properties belonging to © Cali Lili™ and Cali Lili Indies ™ Pictures Words Music In Motion™ feMt0™studi0 etc All Rights Reserved Artist Rights and Intellectual Properties are Rigorously Documented and Rabidly Enforced by Representatives of Cali Lili™
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tctmp · 2 years
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Drama  Fantasy  Music
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pintsizemama · 9 months
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Christmas Craft Fair
Day 11
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Summary: Marcus & Peanut shop at the craft fair.
Pairings: Marcus Pike x You, Marcus Pike x Female Reader (Peanut)
Fandom: The Mentalist
Rating: Mature
Warnings: talk of drinking
Word Count: 542
A/N: This takes place before The Proposal
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Marcus & Peanut Masterlist
Day 10 Day 12 Christmas Masterlist Main Masterlist AO3 Join my taglist
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Marcus’s hand was warm and strong clasped in yours. You walked leisurely by all the booths at the Christmas craft fair. You always loved coming to these. It was so much fun to see all the creative things people made for the holidays. You had just closed the sale of your home in DC last week, and were now settled…well, settling back in Seattle. You didn’t have a place here yet, so you were staying with your parents until you found something.
Sarah was in heaven with 24/7 uninterrupted Grandma and Grandpa time. And your parents were thrilled as well. You had planned to bring your daughter with you today, but your mom insisted you and Marcus enjoy some adult time. So, you decided to take advantage of a baby free shopping trip and buy the rest of your Christmas gifts.
“Do you think my mom would like that?” Marcus asked. You looked to where he was pointing. It was a Christmas sweater that said ‘Best Grandma Ever’.
“Oh my god, yes!” You said immediately. “But you know my mom is gonna want one too.”
“I figured that,” he replied. “They have different colors, so we can get them each one.”
“Perfect,” you agreed. “Let’s get a blue one for your mom since it’s her favorite, and red for mine.” Marcus stepped into the booth to buy the sweaters.
“I think we should give these to them on Christmas Eve so they can wear them on Christmas day,” Marcus said after he paid.
“Good idea.” You walked along and bought more gifts as you went. You had already gotten everyone the big items. This was just some fun extras you guys wanted to get for everyone.
“Oh my god,” Marcus gasped as you approached a woodworking booth. He rushed over and picked up a beautiful doll cradle. It was solid wood and gorgeously crafted. It had a cute tufted headboard with a scene of baby bears on it and a matching blanket and pillow set.
“I have to get this for Sarah,” Marcus told you. “She will love it.” You smiled at your handsome boyfriend. He loved to spoil his little girl.
“She definitely would love this,” you said. Marcus quickly purchased it, afraid to lose out since it was the only one.
“I think we should head back to the car and unload some of this stuff,” you said. Both your arms were very full now.
“Good idea,” Marcus agreed. “Do you want to walk around more or do you want to grab lunch?”
“Mmm,” you moaned. “Lunch sounds good.” Marcus smiled
“Alright,” he said, “how about the pub?”
“Yes!” You shouted. The pub was a local favorite, but it had been years since you’d been there. Living in DC—and then having Sarah when you came to visit—made it impossible to go.
“Oh man, I’m getting a pint for sure,” you said. “Maybe two!”
“I’m not carrying your drunk ass home, Peanut,” Marcus warned.
“You totally would if I needed you to,” you teased.
“I would,” Marcus sighed.
“That’s one of the reasons I love you,” you sing songed.
“C’mon, you lush,” Marcus said. “Let’s go get your beer.” You giggled and followed him to the car.
Day 12
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calililiindies · 2 years
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neil-gaiman · 3 years
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How Did you come up with the first eve in the story about adams wives? I haven’t been able to find anything about her after I read it and I want to know if she’s an actual biblical character or just someone you made
She's from the Midrash. I learned about her as a 12 year old, from my barmitzvah teacher. There was a point in there, long after I'd put her into Sandman, where I was starting to think I'd imagined her, when I ran across her in Robert Graves's Hebrew Myths....
Excerpt from: The Hebrew Myths by Robert Graves and Raphael Patai (New York:  Doubleday, 1964), pp 65-69
Chapter 10: Adam's Helpmeets
(a) Having decided to give Adam a helpmeet lest he should be alone of his kind, God put him into a deep sleep, removed one of his ribs, formed it into a woman, and closed up the wound, Adam awoke and said: 'This being shall be named "Woman", because she has been taken out of man. A man and a woman shall be one flesh.' The title he gave her was Eve, 'the Mother of All Living''. [1]
(b) Some say that God created man and woman in His own image on the Sixth Day, giving them charge over the world; [2]  but that Eve did not yet exist. Now, God had set Adam to name every beast, bird and other living thing. When they passed before him in pairs, male and female, Adam-being already like a twenty-year-old man-felt jealous of their loves, and though he tried coupling with each female in turn, found no satisfaction in the act. He therefore cried: 'Every creature but I has a proper mate', and prayed God would remedy this injustice. [3]
(c) God then formed Lilith, the first woman, just as He had formed Adam, except that He used filth and sediment instead of pure dust. From Adam's union with this demoness, and with another like her named Naamah, Tubal Cain's sister, sprang Asmodeus and innumerable demons that still plague mankind. Many generations later, Lilith and Naamah came to Solomon's judgement seat, disguised as harlots of Jerusalem'. [4]
(d) Adam and Lilith never found peace together; for when he wished to lie with her, she took offence at the recumbent posture he demanded. 'Why must I lie beneath you?' she asked. 'I also was made from dust, and am therefore your equal.' Because Adam tried to compel her obedience by force, Lilith, in a rage, uttered the magic name of God, rose into the air and left him.
Adam complained to God: 'I have been deserted by my helpmeet' God at once sent the angels Senoy, Sansenoy and Semangelof to fetch Lilith back. They found her beside the Red Sea, a region abounding in lascivious demons, to whom she bore lilim at the rate of more than one hundred a day. 'Return to Adam without delay,' the angels said, `or we will drown you!' Lilith asked: `How can I return to Adam and live like an honest housewife, after my stay beside the Red Sea?? 'It will be death to refuse!' they answered. `How can I die,' Lilith asked again, `when God has ordered me to take charge of all newborn children: boys up to the eighth day of life, that of circumcision; girls up to the twentieth day. None the less, if ever I see your three names or likenesses displayed in an amulet above a newborn child, I promise to spare it.' To this they agreed; but God punished Lilith by making one hundred of her demon children perish daily; [5] and if she could not destroy a human infant, because of the angelic amulet, she would spitefully turn against her own. [6]
(e) Some say that Lilith ruled as queen in Zmargad, and again in Sheba; and was the demoness who destroyed job's sons. [7] Yet she escaped the curse of death which overtook Adam, since they had parted long before the Fall. Lilith and Naamah not only strangle infants but also seduce dreaming men, any one of whom, sleeping alone, may become their victim. [8]
(f) Undismayed by His failure to give Adam a suitable helpmeet, God tried again, and let him watch while he built up a woman's anatomy: using bones, tissues, muscles, blood and glandular secretions, then covering the whole with skin and adding tufts of hair in places. The sight caused Adam such disgust that even when this woman, the First Eve, stood there in her full beauty, he felt an invincible repugnance. God knew that He had failed once more, and took the First Eve away. Where she went, nobody knows for certain. [9]
(g) God tried a third time, and acted more circumspectly. Having taken a rib from Adam's side in his sleep, He formed it into a woman; then plaited her hair and adorned her, like a bride, with twenty-four pieces of jewellery, before waking him. Adam was entranced. [10]
(h) Some say that God created Eve not from Adam's rib, but from a tail ending in a sting which had been part of his body. God cut this off, and the stump-now a useless coccyx-is still carried by Adam's descendants. [11]
(i) Others say that God's original thought had been to create two human beings, male and female; but instead He designed a single one with a male face looking forward, and a female face looking back. Again He changed His mind, removed Adam's backward-looking face, and built a woman's body for it. [12]
(j) Still others hold that Adam was originally created as an androgyne of male and female bodies joined back to back. Since this posture made locomotion difficult, and conversation awkward, God divided the androgyne and gave each half a new rear. These separate beings He placed in Eden, forbidding them to couple. [13]
Notes on sources:
1. Genesis II. 18-25; III. 20.
2. Genesis I. 26-28.
3. Gen. Rab. 17.4; B. Yebamot 632.
4. Yalqut Reubeni ad. Gen. II. 21; IV. 8.
5. Alpha Beta diBen Sira, 47; Gaster, MGWJ, 29 (1880), 553 ff.
6. Num. Rab. 16.25.
7. Targum ad job 1. 15.
8. B. Shabbat 151b; Ginzberg, LJ, V. 147-48.
9. Gen. Rab. 158, 163-64; Mid. Abkir 133, 135; Abot diR. Nathan 24; B. Sanhedrin 39a.
10. Gen. II. 21-22; Gen. Rab. 161.
11. Gen. Rab. 134; B. Erubin 18a.
12. B. Erubin 18a.
13. Gen. Rab. 55; Lev. Rab. 14.1: Abot diR. Nathan 1.8; B. Berakhot 61a; B. Erubin 18a; Tanhuma Tazri'a 1; Yalchut Gen. 20; Tanh. Buber iii.33; Mid. Tehillim 139, 529.
Authors’ Comments on the Myth:
1. The tradition that man's first sexual intercourse was with animals, not women, may be due to the widely spread practice of bestiality among herdsmen of the Middle East, which is still condoned by custom, although figuring three times in the Pentateuch as a capital crime. In the Akkadian Gilgamesh Epic, Enkidu is said to have lived with gazelles and jostled other wild beasts at the watering place, until civilized by Aruru's priestess. Having enjoyed her embraces for six days and seven nights, he wished to rejoin the wild beasts but, to his surprise, they fled from him. Enkidu then knew that he had gained understanding, and the priestess said: 'Thou art wise, Enkidu, like unto a godl'
2. Primeval man was held by the Babylonians to have been androgynous. Thus the Gilgamesh Epic gives Enkidu androgynous features: `the hair of his head like a woman's, with locks that sprout like those of Nisaba, the Grain-goddess.' The Hebrew tradition evidently derives from Greek sources, because both terms used in a Tannaitic midrash to describe the bisexual Adam are Greek: androgynos, 'man-woman', and diprosopon, 'twofaced'. Philo of Alexandria, the Hellenistic philosopher and commentator on the Bible, contemporary with Jesus, held that man was at first bisexual; so did the Gnostics. This belief is clearly borrowed from Plato. Yet the myth of two bodies placed back to back may well have been founded on observation of Siamese twins, which are sometimes joined in this awkward manner. The two-faced Adam appears to be a fancy derived from coins or statues of Janus, the Roman New Year god.
3. Divergences between the Creation myths of Genesis r and n, which allow Lilith to be presumed as Adam's first mate, result from a careless weaving together of an early Judaean and a late priestly tradition. The older version contains the rib incident. Lilith typifies the Anath-worshipping Canaanite women, who were permitted pre-nuptial promiscuity. Time after time the prophets denounced Israelite women for following Canaanite practices; at first, apparently, with the priests' approval-since their habit of dedicating to God the fees thus earned is expressly forbidden in Deuteronomy xxIII. I8. Lilith's flight to the Red Sea recalls the ancient Hebrew view that water attracts demons. 'Tortured and rebellious demons' also found safe harbourage in Egypt. Thus Asmodeus, who had strangled Sarah's first six husbands, fled 'to the uttermost parts of Egypt' (Tobit viii. 3), when Tobias burned the heart and liver of a fish on their wedding night.
4. Lilith's bargain with the angels has its ritual counterpart in an apotropaic rite once performed in many Jewish communities. To protect the newborn child against Lilith-and especially a male, until he could be permanently safeguarded by circumcision-a ring was drawn with natron, or charcoal, on the wall of the birthroom, and inside it were written the words: 'Adam and Eve. Out, Lilith!' Also the names Senoy, Sansenoy and Semangelof (meanings uncertain) were inscribed on the door. If Lilith nevertheless succeeded in approaching the child and fondling him, he would laugh in his sleep. To avert danger, it was held wise to strike the sleeping child's lips with one finger-whereupon Lilith would vanish.
5. 'Lilith' is usually derived from the Babylonian-Assyrian word lilitu, ,a female demon, or wind-spirit'-one of a triad mentioned in Babylonian spells. But she appears earlier as 'Lillake' on a 2000 B.G. Sumerian tablet from Ur containing the tale of Gilgamesh and the Willow Tree. There she is a demoness dwelling in the trunk of a willow-tree tended by the Goddess Inanna (Anath) on the banks of the Euphrates. Popular Hebrew etymology seems to have derived 'Lilith' from layil, 'night'; and she therefore often appears as a hairy night-monster, as she also does in Arabian folklore. Solomon suspected the Queen of Sheba of being Lilith, because she had hairy legs. His judgement on the two harlots is recorded in I Kings III. 16 ff. According to Isaiah xxxiv. I4-I5, Lilith dwells among the desolate ruins in the Edomite Desert where satyrs (se'ir), reems, pelicans, owls, jackals, ostriches, arrow-snakes and kites keep her company.
6. Lilith's children are called lilim. In the Targum Yerushalmi, the priestly blessing of Numbers vi. 26 becomes: 'The Lord bless thee in all thy doings, and preserve thee from the Lilim!' The fourth-century A.D. commentator Hieronymus identified Lilith with the Greek Lamia, a Libyan queen deserted by Zeus, whom his wife Hera robbed of her children. She took revenge by robbing other women of theirs.
7. The Lamiae, who seduced sleeping men, sucked their blood and ate their flesh, as Lilith and her fellow-demonesses did, were also known as Empusae, 'forcers-in'; or Mormolyceia, 'frightening wolves'; and described as 'Children of Hecate'. A Hellenistic relief shows a naked Lamia straddling a traveller asleep on his back. It is characteristic of civilizations where women are treated as chattels that they must adopt the recumbent posture during intercourse, which Lilith refused. That Greek witches who worshipped Hecate favoured the superior posture, we know from Apuleius; and it occurs in early Sumerian representations of the sexual act, though not in the Hittite. Malinowski writes that Melanesian girls ridicule what they call `the missionary position', which demands that they should lie passive and recumbent.
8. Naamah, 'pleasant', is explained as meaning that 'the demoness sang pleasant songs to idols'. Zmargad suggest smaragdos, the semi-precious aquamarine; and may therefore be her submarine dwelling. A demon named Smaragos occurs in the Homeric Epigrams.
9. Eve's creation by God from Adam's rib-a myth establishing male supremacy and disguising Eve's divinity-lacks parallels in Mediterranean or early Middle-Eastern myth. The story perhaps derives iconotropically from an ancient relief, or painting, which showed the naked Goddess Anath poised in the air, watching her lover Mot murder his twin Aliyan; Mot (mistaken by the mythographer for Yahweh) was driving a curved dagger under Aliyan's fifth rib, not removing a sixth one. The familiar story is helped by a hidden pun on tsela, the Hebrew for 'rib': Eve, though designed to be Adam's helpmeet, proved to be a tsela, a 'stumbling', or 'misfortune'. Eve's formation from Adam's tail is an even more damaging myth; perhaps suggested by the birth of a child with a vestigial tail instead of a coccyx-a not infrequent occurrence.
10. The story of Lilith's escape to the East and of Adam's subsequent marriage to Eve may, however, record an early historical incident: nomad herdsmen, admitted into Lilith's Canaanite queendom as guests (see 16. 1), suddenly seize power and, when the royal household thereupon flees, occupy a second queendom which owes allegiance to the Hittite Goddess Heba.
The meaning of 'Eve' is disputed. Hawwah is explained in Genesis III. 20 as 'mother of all living'; but this may well be a Hebraicized form of the divine name Heba, Hebat, Khebat or Khiba. This goddess, wife of the Hittite Storm-god, is shown riding a lion in a rock-sculpture at Hattusaswhich equates her with Anath-and appears as a form of Ishtar in Hurrian texts. She was worshipped at Jerusalem (see 27. 6). Her Greek name was Hebe, Heracles's goddess-wife.
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chateautae · 4 years
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the most wonderful time of the year | kth. (m)
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➵ summary :  taehyung hasn’t seen you since high school graduation, but when he finds himself in need of a date for his friend’s annual christmas party, running into you is like a godsend; especially when he once had feelings for you, and little did he know, you felt the same way all along.
➵ pairing : taehyung x reader
➵ genre :  nonidol!au, f2l, fluff, smut
➵ rating : 18+
➵ word count : 19k
➵ warnings : mutual pining, sexual content, swearing, dom!tae, cuddling resulting in over the clothes stuff, rough fingering, oral (f. receiving), dirty talk, big dick!tae cause we know he’s packing, marking, restraint (with his own hands), choking, begging, unprotected sex (wrap it up peeps), hitting it from the back 😜, mirror (?) sex (reflection of a window), rough sex but then i love you sex, praising, slight humiliation, denied orgasm, creampie, aftercare
part of ksmutclub’s winter project 2020!, using prompt #7: “did everyone else come with a date?”
➵ a/n : thank you to @getmemyfries​ for beta-reading and constantly reassuring me about this fic, idk where she’s been all my life 😭, but surprise!! would you believe me if i told you guys i grinded this in just 3 days?? because YES i did, 19k in three days as a Christmas gift pretties, happy late holidays!!, comments and feedback are always appreciated <3
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“Are you serious, Jimin?” 
“Very. I don’t know how you didn’t get the memo, literally everyone was talking about it.” 
“Did everyone else come with a date? There has to be at least one person who didn’t.” 
“And that one person is you, Tae. Did you forget that I made the theme all about mistletoe? Who did you expect to kiss under it, me?” 
“Super funny, Jimin. I just got really busy and I don’t even think I was paying attention to you.” 
“Well, it’s your loss now, everyone came with a date and you’ll be third-wheeling the whole night. You can’t blame us either, it’s cuffing season and you know it.” 
“Do I really have to come? I’ll just spend Christmas with my family.” 
“And ruin their vacation with your annoying ass? What a lovely son, an even better best friend for ditching my party.” 
“Okay, Jimin, I get it. Just-fuck, alright, I’ll find someone. Please tell me you didn’t plan anything too couply in case I have to bring an absolute stranger.” 
“Hmm, I’ll think about it.” 
And Jimin cut the call without a second to spare. 
Taehyung stood there baffled, appalled by his best friend for not even having said goodbye. But then again, maybe he really deserved it. Taehyung had just become too busy with his job this year to even think about Jimin and his friends’ party, allowing it to inhabit the back of his mind and loom over him for weeks, though not giving it the time of day he should’ve. 
And now he’s stuck in a situation he doesn’t know how to get out of. The party is in just two days, how exactly was he supposed to find someone that would even agree to accompany him? 
One, they would have to be someone explicitly bored on Christmas Eve. Two, comfortable with meeting complete strangers and spending an entire night with them. Third, they would have to be willing to even fake-date him. 
Taehyung knew he could at least satisfy the third requirement with just a smidge of his charm and good looks, though the real issues were the other two requirements, especially the first one. 
Who the fuck is ever doing nothing on Christmas Eve? 
These are the exact thoughts that clouded Taehyung’s mind, sighing heavily as he dejectedly sauntered into a coffee shop after work. It wasn’t the usual place, but he decided on a new one in search of a possible partner; even if it were a stranger from a different coffee shop, he’d take what he could get. 
It’s precisely why he began scanning the room just enough to discern any potential date as he waited in line. With his hands in his pockets, lips buried into his plaid scarf that draped over his brown winter coat, and attempted to make eye contact with any female he thought eligible. 
He spotted some cute girls, though made quick judgements about them not fitting his requirements; some meeting boyfriends, family, yapping away about Christmas plans as though the whole store needed to hear about it.
Pulling out his phone, he considered he had some female friends, maybe co-workers he could convince to tag along. It sounded like a great idea in his head, though when he scrolled though his contacts carefully, he found himself coming up short once again. 
Not only had he seen his friends’ stories, all flaunting their very apparent Christmas plans, but even more so his co-workers having literally informed him about either flying back home, meeting family or easing up far, far away on a tropical beach. 
And he definitely knew there’d be no one available. 
All of it made Taehyung feel deflated once he had placed his order and waited patiently by the store’s counter. He thought he was royally fucked, needed to forego social etiquette and just ask a damn stranger at this point. 
Sighing yet again, he mindlessly looked over to the side, catching a glimpse of the person ordering after him with a voice he suddenly recognized. Taehyung’s eyebrows immediately shot to the sky once he took a double-take, a near injustice to say he was only shocked. 
He was practically floored, had to rub his eyes a few times just to make sure he wasn’t seeing things. Surely he’d lost it after the gruesome shift he just pulled at work, because he was pondering how in God’s name was he seeing you of all people ordering. 
How the hell did you manage to look 100x prettier than you used to, Taehyung thought. It was no doubt you; your smile still charming as ever, your hair still elegantly soft, your eyes still naturally sparkling under every Christmas light in the store just like they always did. 
It was really you. 
The same you he knew all throughout high school though moved away after graduation, the same you who was brilliant at every subject though could never understand math, the same you who waltzed into school with that plaid winter coat anyone could recognize you for, the same you who always teased him about his love for pineapple on pizza because you could never comprehend the taste. 
The same you he once liked.   
It was actually you, bundled up in a gray winter coat and white scarf as you smiled a thank you to the barista, eventually making your way over to the counter Taehyung was situated at, settling next to him without having noticed. 
Taehyung thought you were an angel sent from heaven, a Godsend, his one and only true saviour once he studied you up close, concluding that you weren’t just some mirage but in fact his real-life friend from years ago who could possibly rescue him from this Christmas party fuck up. 
And so he didn’t waste a single, valuable moment, because you know what they say, ‘carpe diem’, oh captain my captain. 
“Y/N Y/L/N? Is that you?”
Your surprised eyes snapped towards the oddly familiar low voice, eyebrows shooting up once you resgitered just who exactly said your name. You seemed to be in the same disbelief as Taehyung, himself utterly grateful you’d actually recognized him. 
“Oh my God, Kim Taehyung?”
“Yeah, it’s me.” Taehyung laughed shyly. “Damn, how long has it been? 5? 6 years?” 
“6 years, yeah.” You confirmed with a smile. “Since graduation.” 
“I can’t believe that was 6 years ago, seems just like yesterday.” Taehyung couldn’t wipe the stupid smile off his face remembering the chaotic party by the lake you all threw together, resulting in someone nearly drowning, Taehyung downing more alcohol than he ever had in his life, and you shamelessly shoving everyone into the water until you eventually capsized yourself. 
Taehyung had to collect himself to coherently speak sentences again, nearly feeling his neurons incessantly firing off in his brain. “But wow, when did you come back to town?” 
“3 months ago, I was transferred for work.” You informed casually, though your sweet smile was infectious. “Wow, I’m.. I can’t believe I ran into you here.” You were honestly still shocked, marveling at the fact you somehow bumped into Kim Taehyung, the Kim Taehyung from high school.  
The same Taehyung who teased you about being terrible at math, the same one who only ever brought strawberry jam sandwiches to school and God forbid someone ever took a bite. The same Taehyung who was the cute social butterfly everyone completely adored at school. 
The same Taehyung you once liked.   
“It doesn’t feel long indeed, but you look.. different.” You did a light scan of him, noticing just how how much taller, more handsome and manlier he appeared. It was reflected in the edge of his jawline, crisp face structure and broader upper body. 
Quite frankly, he looked incredibly striking, almost intimidatingly so, and you could only think about when Taehyung used to appear a little scrawnier, lankier though still attractive all the same with his adorable eyes and plushy lips. 
It was nearly daunting to see the gorgeous difference now. 
“You look different too.. good different.” He added with a smile as he looked you over, and it was pleasant to see he still had that same boxy smile, the same little creases at the corner of his eyes. Though instead now, his smile looked devilishly handsome, and it was hard to not trip over your own feet about it. 
“You too. You’re so much taller now.” You commented, craning your neck just to converse with him. 
“And you’re still short, huh?” 
Your mouth flew open, scandalized at the comment though laughed when he chuckled at your expression. “Oh c’mon, you’re still gonna tease me about how short I am? It’s been six years, Taehyung.” 
“Hey, don’t think it’s not payback for all those times you lectured me about how ‘inhuman’ liking pineapple on pizza was. I still have your PowerPoint presentations saved.” Taehyung retorted through a laugh, remembering the way you’d really take the time to conjure up presentations just so he could be  unconvinced of the preference. 
“Okay, okay. You got me. Is there ever a way I could make it up to you... Assistant Curator Kim?” You read the lanyard that hung around his neck, inspecting it to see his ID photo along with his job title. 
“Ah,” Taehyung exclaimed, scrambling for the lanyard. “I was in a rush to get out of work so I left it on by accident.” Taehyung explained a little embarrassed, unhooking it from around his neck. 
“Why were you in a rush?” You knitted your eyebrows together, only asking out of innocent curiosity, though Taehyung lit up like a Christmas tree, knowing this was his golden opportunity and he was definitely going to take his chance. 
“Uh.. do you still remember Park Jimin and the rest of our friends?” Taehyung started. 
“Oh my God, of course I do! You’re all still friends?”
“Unfortunately, yeah. I mean, even when we get tired of each other we know nobody else will put up with us, so we’re still close.” Taehyung snickered, remembering him and his friends were still the same 7 dorks from high school. 
“Awh, I wish I could see them, we used to have so much fun together.” You pouted, shoving your hands into your pockets as you recalled amusing memories from years ago; stupid adventures to the lake by your school, chasing the sunset, knowing you probably incessantly bothered the owner of that one gas station you always visited. 
“Actually, the reason why I was rushing was because Jimin holds an annual Christmas Eve party, and this time around he made it a ‘bring-a-date’ memo, and I kinda got too busy to remember.” Taehyung began scratching the back of his neck, a little shy considering he didn’t really listen to Jimin when he should’ve. 
“Ohh.” You nodded understandingly. “So you forgot to get a date?” 
“Yeah.” Taehyung confirmed, nodding with some disappointment in himself. “But say, you mentioned a favour, right?” Taehyung eyed you knowingly, hand never leaving his neck as he forced himself to get the question out. “Are you doing anything on Christmas Eve?” 
You were a little taken aback, thinking you knew exactly where he was going with this, and also thinking it was a damn Christmas miracle. You remembered your unfortunate situation for Christmas Eve; your parents having booked a cottage for themselves considering you’d be working that day, though gladly enough your boss decided it was the most wonderful time of the year, so why the fuck would he keep people hostage at work? 
It landed you with quite literally nothing to do on the joyous day, and excitement began to fill your chest already about your answer, though you composed yourself to appear normal. 
“No, actually. My parents are at a cottage together, so I was going to be home.” 
Taehyung could’ve been on cloud nine right about now, thanking God or whatever supreme being for answering his prayers. You’d literally checked off his every requirement perfectly, and now all that was left was...
“Would you like come to Jimin’s party as my date? I know it’s only in 2 days and it’s really sudden, but I’m kinda stuck right now and I promised Jimin I would come after finding someone, he’ll probably kick my ass if I don’t-” 
“I’d love to come.” You broke out into a grin at his adorable rambling, nearly giddy your assumption from before was exactly correct.
“Wait, seriously? You mean that?” Taehyung asked in wonderment. 
“Why would I lie to you, Taehyung?” You chuckled at the endearing way his face was lighting up, trying to ensure he couldn’t see the stars in your eyes as you looked at him.  
“Oh my God, you actually just.. saved my life.” Taehyung reveled, expression of utter gratitude. 
“Don’t mention it. It’s all I can do after making you sit through 10 minutes of me berating you for liking fruit on pizza. It’s still weird, by the way.” 
“Hey, don’t make me take your drink and ask you to jump for it.” Taehyung chastised, biting back a smile at the fact that you two still bickered like old times. 
“Fair point, so in two days, huh?” 
“Mhm. Can I get your number, actually? I’ll send you the details tonight.” Taehyung began digging for his phone in his pocket. 
“Oh, yeah of course.” You agreed as you went for yours. You both huddled a little closer to exchange the digits, trading phones and adding your names into each other’s contacts. It dawned a slight fuzzy feeling in your chest, getting a whiff of Taehyung’s masculine cologne and realizing in this proximity, just how incredibly ravishing Taehyung had in fact grown up, how much larger and broader he was in comparison to you. 
That he was a man now, not the quirky little dork you once knew, and that thought alone caused something to momentarily alight inside you. 
He was a man now. 
“Remember when we only had iPods and had to talk through our land lines?” Taehyung took a trip down memory lane and grounded you back to Earth, returning your phone to you. 
“Ah yes, when technology was just expanding and us 90′s kids were always caught in the weird middle.” You reminisced as he chuckled, recalling the older days. 
You were just finishing typing in your name for your contact, nearly clicking save until you decided to add the little bow emoji next to your name, handing Taehyung’s phone back to him. 
“A bow?” Taehyung inquired, finding it cute. 
“I deserve it, I’m your little Christmas present under your tree, aren’t I?” You flashed him a cute flower pose with a kittenish grin, the barista calling out Taehyung’s order just after. 
Taehyung could only smile widely, endeared you still had that same playful charm. “Yeah, you are.” He made for his drink and nabbed it, fixing his phone back into this pocket before addressing you. “I’ve gotta get going. I’ll see you in 2 days, okay? It was seriously great meeting you again. Y/N.” 
“You too, I’ll see you then!” You chimed with a wave as Taehyung began stepping away, almost turning from him until he suddenly called out to you one last time, just about through the door.  
“Thank you again, Y/N, I owe you, my Christmas present!” He shouted his last words through a stupid smile, you returning the same one as a welcome before Taehyung exited the shop. 
And you couldn’t stop yourself from breaking out into the goofiest grin then, cheeks hotter than you remembered. You were glad Taehyung was still the same charismatic, easily lovable person from high school, the same charm and adorable impishness about him. 
Only now, he was all grown up and matured, no longer the slightly awkward, though heartfelt kid who liked stealing your history notes. And you became a little afraid feeling the same flutter in your heart from 6 years ago, curious if it was just a momentary lapse upon seeing him again, or signaling the ignition of an old flame it took you years to forget. 
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Taehyung : remember to bring your competitive side today ;)
You : omg, what did jimin plan? 
Taehyung : you’ll have to wait and see 
Taehyung : jimin’s a creative one, remember? 
You : how could i forget? i’m never forgiving him for making me spend 3 hours writing calligraphy for that anthro project 😭
Taehyung : man, the guys are gonna love seeing you again
Taehyung : be there in 5! 
You : gotchu! 
You hated that you smiled so stupidly at your screen, never having forgotten the fluttery feeling Taehyung always managed to manifest in your stomach.
You clicked your phone screen off and checked over your outfit for the umpteenth time, wanting to look good not only for Taehyung (though that was the primary reason) but also for the rest of the crew. It’d seriously been too long since you last saw each other, having always been up to dumb shenanigans in high school though sadly parting ways after graduation. 
It was only inevitable with everyone’s future plans being so dissimilar, you having gone down the road of law and miraculously scoring a scholarship to a prestigious university a few towns over, spelling your departure from your beloved childhood city and therefore, goodbye to everyone you knew. 
You were glad the boys managed to remain so closely-knitted despite their different paths; Taehyung having clearly acquired a job at a museum considering his love for art. Last time you remembered, Jimin was an aspiring dancer, Hoseok was a natural at hospitality, Seokjin always rambled on about acting, Jungkook was gifted with a camera, Namjoon adored books and Yoongi wouldn’t trade music for the world. 
It was bittersweet recalling such memories, having to leave behind everything you knew to pursue your own dream. Bitter, though sweet knowing you had larger than life opportunities awaiting you. It was precisely what landed you your current job, working comfortably at a high-status law firm albeit stealing very much of your time. 
It was perfect, nonetheless, since the main office was located back home and you had just been transferred 3 months ago, finding your way back 6 years later. You didn’t know if the boys were still in town, had no real clue where their lives went with only stray social media posts indicating they were still alive and healthy. 
So running into Taehyung all of a sudden? It made you more than glad, remembering not only your fun times together as a group, but your comfortable friendship with him, and the undeniable feelings you’d developed overtime. 
Suffice to say, you both were quirky yet cute, and you made perfect sense. Not only did it land you two a supportive relationship full of laughs and teasing, but also numerous instances where someone’s actions or behaviour became suggestive, questioned the borders of actual friendship between you though nobody willing to take the leap, and it left all your friends inquiring exactly when you two would start dating. 
Though that was the sad part, you never did. And the reason why? You have no real clue. It simply never dawned on you to express your feelings towards Taehyung in fear of him not feeling the same, thinking your crush was just a phase and you’d eventually view him as a friend again, a process of denial you repeated for the 4 grueling years of high school.
Though the second you realized you’d have to say goodbye so soon, with the possibility you’d never see him again, you realized Taehyung was the one boy you truly loved, and sometimes questioned if you still did. 
It hurt to have to hug him one last time before you disconnected, remembering the way you cried having to part from everyone, and Taehyung held you against him until your eyes dried, waving an innocent goodbye before you rounded the corner of your street and disappeared forever. 
To this day you haven’t got a clue if Taehyung ever felt the same, always chalking up his little lingering touches, hugs and double entendres to his naturally flirtatious and outgoing nature. It hindered your ability to say anything, thinking over the years maybe your non-confessional departure was an enormous mistake. 
So when you heard the doorbell of your apartment ring, in the five minutes Taehyung promised, your heart couldn't help but leap at the thought you’d see him again, meet all your old friends and spend an entire festive, fun-filled night with them. 
You made for the door without a second thought and pulled it ajar, meeting Taehyung’s somehow more stunning self all ready to go. He’d decided today to dress with a tan plaid coat, black turtle neck poking out from underneath paired with black slacks to match; and you realized Taehyung definitely invented the all-black look. 
Sources? You. 
You almost gawked, his hair set to reveal some forehead though curl just before his eyebrows, and it was evilly handsome. He was evilly handsome. 
You remembered he was standing right in front of you, thinking a good moment has passed since you uttered anything, a warm smile as you addressed him. “Hi.” 
“Hi.” He greeted back, scanning over you, and you didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered for a second on your legs. You’d gone for your same gray coat, though surprisingly with an all black outfit underneath as well, cute wrap around dress with a v line dipping just generously enough, all paired with pantyhose. 
Who cares about a little cold when you want to look cute anyway, right? 
“We’re matching, it’s cute.” He complimented, his smile just a little impish as it met your chest momentarily though flashed back up to you. 
“I guess you’re cute too.” You shrugged, nearly hiding your face under his scrutiny. 
“We should get going, m’lady. Jimin’ll chew my head off if I’m late too.” Taehyung feigned a sophisticated tone, turning aside and holding out his arm for you to loop like a gentleman. 
You chuckled just a little and clutched your side bag, hooking onto his arm as you switched the lights of your apartment off and shut the door behind you. 
“Now would the kind sir tell me what we’re doing today?” You inquired as Taehyung began walking you down the hallway, peering at his God-like side profile. “You’ve been so mysterious about it.” 
Taehyung clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “Now what’s the point of a surprise if I tell you?” 
“But why is it a surprise? Don’t tell me it’s something ridiculous like rock climbing.” You playfully scolded, trying to keep up with his long strides as he led you towards the elevator. 
“Maybe it’s just to see the way your face will light up when you find out.” Taehyung suggested with narrowed eyes as he looked down at you, you staring back at him in scrutiny until you both snickered. 
And as you entered the elevator arm in arm with him, maybe you felt that same skip of your heartbeat from years ago. 
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“Holy shit, Y/N Y/L/N? Is that you?” Jimin’s face was utterly surprised, his warm, puppy eyes you remember too well wide as he held the door open.
“Of course it is, Park Jimin!” You cheered as you held your arms out for a hug, his gentle arm wrapping around your torso as he beamed.
“The guys are not gonna believe this, I gotta tell em’. Come in, come in!” Jimin ushered you and Taehyung inside, redirecting his attention to the beautiful, open space condo he called his humble abode. “Guys! Come to the front, look who’s here!”
You and Taehyung were propping your boots off when people eventually came piling into the front foyer and responding to Jimin absentmindedly. All were similarly unsuspecting their eyes widened when landing on you, sounding the next slew of hilarious commentary you’d missed too damn much. 
“No way, is that Y/N?”
“Holy fuck, Y/N?”
“Y/N, we thought you left town, when did you come back?”
“Taehyung, how the hell did you find her?”
“Even better, how the fuck did he get her to come as his date?” It was Jungkook who made the quip that elicited everyone’s snickering, yourself simply overwhelmed by the amount of memories that came back just by the sound of their quite manlier now, though familiar voices.
They all still had the same charming features, each of them reminiscent of their teenaged selves, but the difference? Now they were polished into captivatingly good-looking men you were baffled to even know at this point. 
“Oh my God, it’s been 6 years, just let me hug you guys!” You excitedly gestured for them to come to you, friendly smiles all around as you embraced and reunited. 
“Jungkook, why wouldn’t she agree? You trying to say something?” Taehyung didn’t let the earlier insult go, eyebrows quirked as he retorted.
“Dude, Y/N has always been out of your league.” Yoongi added.
“And honestly, now she’s even more out of your league.” Seokjin joined the teasing and it erupted another bout of cackling from the group, you only left to shyly scrunch your nose and giggle.
“Okay, okay, let’s move from standing here, yeah? There’s a party and 6 years worth of catching up to do!” Jimin chimed, chastising everyone huddled by the corridor and allowing you and Taehyung to settle into the home.
Jimin was still the meticulous perfectionist you knew back then, his home adorably charmed with Christmas decorations that made his place feel incredibly warm. His pretty Christmas tree in the corner with some gifts wrapped underneath, his fireplace adorned with pretty stockings, even the small trinkets scattered around were reminding your sadly adult-self that it was indeed Christmas, and it’s meant to be jolly. 
It automatically created an atmosphere of festivity, and catching sight of the dates each friend brought moving about, it only felt more like the holidays with 14 people occupying the home. 
You were marveling with a wide smile at the scene before you, everyone moving back into the house to resume what they were previously doing until you suddenly felt someone’s hands hook onto the neck collar of your jacket from behind. You whirled around in an instant with seeking eyes, viewing the culprit was none other than the only owner of the largest, most slender hands you still found incredibly attractive.
Goddamn you.
“Sorry, I’ll just take your jacket for you.” Taehyung realized he may have startled you. 
“Oh!” You exclaimed, hurriedly shredding off the layer not having noticed you were still wearing it. “I could put it away myself though, give me yours.”
You reached for Taehyung’s jacket in his hands, though he immediately jut the jacket further away from you in protest. “No, no. You’re my date, I’m taking it.”
“But Tae-”
“Hey, you’re my present, remember? You deserve it.” Taehyung mimicked you from your exchange at the coffee shop, you ultimately acquiescing as a result.
“Fine.” You rolled your eyes playfully, though a laugh was pulling at you all the same. “What would you be, though?” You asked out of curiosity. “If I’m the present, what are you?” 
Taehyung toyed with your question in his thoughts until he chose the perfect answer, lips growing into a smirk as he drew closer to your face a little. “The one who gets to open it up.”
Something shot through you that was alarming, his cocked eyebrow indicative he was being suggestive, and you played it off with a scoff. “It’s not even Christmas morning yet, and I know you’re just the goodest little boy on Earth who’d wait until he can open his presents.” You clasped your hands together, condescendingly feigning innocence. 
“Or maybe you just never got to know, Y/N.” Taehyung then suddenly leaned down much closer to your face, inches from you as he looked into your eyes. “I haven’t always been a good boy.” 
Taehyung was boring something undistinguishable into you, though the double meaning of his words left apparent heat in the air between you. 
And here it fucking was again, those same double entendres Taehyung had always shot your way though you always took it as him simply fooling around, so you always joined in with your own jokes, assuming the same approach now.  
“Hmm, we’ll see about that, Good boy. Santa’s watching.” You countered as you patted his chest sarcastically, causing Taehyung to stand to his full height biting his lip. 
He stared at you for a moment before walking away, noticing how long his legs were and the unfair curve of his ass, and you suddenly gained a new feature of his to ogle at. He eventually disappeared and you breathed, temporarily forgetting you had a dumb habit of holding your breath whenever he was so close; his piney with a hint of ocean breeze cologne having been left behind, and hitting you like a truck just as much as his all black outfit did. 
God fucking dammit. 
You decided to ignore your intrusive thoughts and waltz into the party instead, grabbing yourself a drink and eventually making your way towards some of the boys’ pretty dates. It was refreshing to feel the presence of women, thanking the Heavens they were all relatively sweet and amicable. 
Conversation always came easy to you, what with being a lawyer who has to be a master with words anyway, so it wasn’t difficult to not only befriend some of the girls, but also reconnect with the boys merrily, Taehyung by your side. 
“Y/N, how dare you not contact any of us about coming back?” Hoseok asked, a little upset timbre in his tone. 
“Yeah, I’m actually a little hurt you ended up coming with Tae of all people. After all the books I shared with you?” Namjoon feigned disappointment, a hand to his heart in near heartbreak. 
“Dude, what’s wrong with her coming with me? Not my fault you gave her boring ass books.” Taehyung defended.
“Tae, you’d steal her history notes for fuck’s sake.” Namjoon countered with narrowed eyes. 
“Guys, it’s been years. I just thought it’d been too long, so I didn’t say anything.” You stopped them, sadly remembering the way communication dwindled out the more you all progressed in your life. 
“Look, you’re always welcomed, Y/N. You think I’d forget the girl who pulled an all-nighter just to edit my shitty final essay for English? I told you I’d write your name on my damn tombstone when I got an 80.” Seokjin laughed with a glass of eggnog, though supportive in his remark and it made you reminisce. 
“I have no clue to this day how you passed English on just Sparknotes. Jungkook hated English more than you and he still managed to actually read 1984.” You chastised him like old times, though now it was a memory that brought a smile to your face. 
“Look, I wasn’t interested in knowing the asshole motives of Big Brother and the 3-minute hate speech.” Seokjin defended himself. 
“2-minute, and it was still a good book.” 
“You’re telling me 60 pages of that dumb manifesto Winston found was good?” Taehyung perked up with crossed arms, quirking his eyebrows at you in incredulousness.  
“Oh c’mon, you learn the entire history of the Party and all their bullshit.” 
“And you’re still a nerd, I see.” Taehyung ticked his head to the side with his snarky remark. 
“Oh shut up, I got a better mark than you on the final essay anyway.” You rolled your eyes. 
“Doesn’t take away from the fact that you’re a nerd.” Taehyung countered. 
You gave a disapproving, scrutinizing look as you marched your way over to Jimin’s Christmas tree, comically gesturing to the Balsam Fir beside you. “I’m literally your Christmas present under the tree, Taehyung, you have to be nice to me.” You chastised him though it only made the boys looking on crack up. 
“Y/N, you’re still hilarious as fuck.” Hoseok was lighting up with laughter, his pretty giggles sounding in a way that honestly made you giggle in the end too, Taehyung only letting up because you were just so you, and it tugged at his heart strings.
“Speaking of Jungkook from earlier, where is he? I just remembered the math notes he owes me his life for.” You perked up, gauging his presence around in the condo. 
“He’s over there eating the chocolate chips, yah, Jungkook! Stop it!” Seokjin scolded from across the room where Jimin and Yoongi were bustling about in the kitchen, and you became confused hearing the mention of chocolate chips. 
“Chocolate chips? I mean, I’m not complaining, but that’s quite the eccentric choice for party food.” You held up your hands in mock surrender. 
“Oh, Taehyung didn’t tell you? It’s for the competition later.” Namjoon informed, though you only furrowed your eyebrows. 
“Competition?” 
“Yeah, baking competition. Jimin planned a couple’s one for his mistletoe theme. I’m beating all your asses, by the way. I’m a genius at decorating.” Hoseok folded his arms with a self-satisfied expression. 
“Please, my girlfriend and I hold weekly bake-offs, watch yourselves, losers.” Seokjin calmed everyone down with his own greatness, you simply becoming beyond excited. 
You turned to Taehyung in an instant, expression completely telling of wonder as you inquired with a high-pitched tone. “Tae, you didn’t tell me we were having a baking competition, that’s so cool!” You beamed, elatedly looking towards Jimin and Yoongi preparing ingredients.  
“Taehyung’s a cryptic one, remember?” Namjoon joked, trying to stifle a laugh with a hand over his mouth, and Taehyung immediately defended himself.
“Shut up, hyung.” He sounded offended, though the smile tugging at his lips indicated after years of friendship, he’d never actually grow vexed at his admirable friend. 
Taehyung then met your eyes, smile growing more apparent, warmer. “I told you it was to see the way your face would light up, didn’t I?” He tilted his head to the side then, eyes playfully studying you as he confirmed his observation. “Yup, your eyes totally still sparkle the same.” 
You couldn’t help but fill with another wave of fuzziness, feeling as though Taehyung always knew how to make your insides all giddy, and maybe even thinking what’s so wrong if your feelings really were coming back? 
You could only smile sheepishly at him, the rest of the boys knowingly watching the two of you like they have for years, everyone only falling out of the trance of the moment when Jimin’s voice called out from the kitchen.  
“Alright Martha Stewarts, who’s starting the ass-kicking?” 
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“Hyung! That’s not fair, you can’t steal from us!” Jungkook scolded him as you watched the mania in front of you, Seokjin and his girlfriend Sa-Ha vs. Jungkook and his date Mira. It was becoming devastatingly hilarious, both teams only having 1 minute left until their cookies had to be plated in tip-top shape, all scrambling to create the best-looking ones. 
“I can and I will, you stole from us first!” Seokjin rebutted him, Jimin raising his voice to signal how much left time was. 
“30 seconds you guys, make it count!” And it was another catastrophic seconds until the timer went off, both teams exhausted and complaining all the same about their hard time fueled by Jin and Jungkook’s endless bickering. 
It was laughs for the few of you looking on, waiting your turns until Jimin’s date Song-i chose from the hat of pairings, your eyes going wide once she called out your name with Taehyung’s against Hoseok and his date. 
“Oh my God, Tae, that’s us!” You grabbed his arm alarmed, seeming nervous and it caused him to look at you. 
“Why are you so nervous? We’ll do great.” 
You scoffed at him in protest. “Taehyung, you did horrible in home ec, we’re gonna lose!” 
“Hey, I’ll make you jump for the ingredients, have some faith, will you?” Taehyung retorted, grabbing you by your hand and dragging you over to one of the two counters Jimin’s grand condo had to offer. 
“We’re taking you guys down on decorations, I’m a genius.” Hoseok gloated from his counter, tying his apron as he eyed you. 
“I have a curator on my team, Hobi, we’re beating you.” You scrutinized him with an angry pout as he stuck his tongue out, you whirling back around to adjust your apron. 
“Okay everyone, aprons on?” Jimin inquired, you having put on yours though watching Taehyung struggle with figuring out the apparently rocket-science contraption. 
You sighed with a laugh until you grabbed it from his hands, helping him out. “It’s like this, Tae.” You got on your tippy-toes to situate the apron around his neck as he bent down for you, the contrast of your heights always having made Taehyung a little weak. 
He was only left to watch you as you fixed the apron onto him, finding himself not even watching anymore, but straight up gazing, admiring. 
Admiring the way your eyes were always in a state of perpetual sparkle, your small lips he never forgot the amount of times he contemplated kissing, your dress revealing your collarbones and chest that beckoned for him to just tear it off, all weakening him even more so.
What made him even weaker, however, was noting the way you’ve matured into a woman after 6 years. 
A very beautiful, attractive woman. 
Your body had always been art to him, but now you were polished into a masterpiece he desired to adore, run his hands all over. Your face structure was more evened out, hair set to fall elegantly upon your shoulders and neck so utterly inviting it all added a sense of sexy maturity to you. 
It was distracting, Taehyung venturing off on the thought you were a woman now, not the innocent, sweet nerd he once knew, and it constantly began to rack his brain when he felt something course through his veins about it. 
Because you used to be so painfully innocent, so naturally a girl next door he couldn’t help but want to taint sometimes, to ruin and unravel for his own. He could even feel it with every time your smaller hands touched his body as you worked the apron guilelessly, wanting to snatch up your wrists instead and do unspeakable things, especially with that fucking dress on his mind. 
What made it all worse is that Taehyung could tell you only acted guileless, and never actually were. You also made your own suggestive comments, always caught his drift and he could tell you weren’t the innocent little thing you appeared to be. 
 Taehyung was so completely lost he heard you suddenly calling his name. 
“Taehyung, are you listening?” 
He blinked. “Huh?” 
“You have to listen to what I say, okay? Just follow my instructions and we’ll win against them.” You made little fists in the air to encourage him, Taehyung mimicking the action. 
“Y-yeah. I will, let’s do this.” You turned around after smiling sweetly, fixing some of the utensils on the counter and completely unsuspecting of Taehyung’s thoughts. 
That even after 6 years apart, after thinking he’d successfully forgotten about you, there was still something that pulled at his heart every time he saw you smile, every time you were ever near him. 
And he came to the conclusion maybe his feelings really haven’t changed from 6 years ago. 
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“Taehyung, can you pass me the butter, please?” You asked urgently, whisking away at your bowl of almost-there cookie dough with Taehyung hovering around you as he watched. 
“Got it.” He returned with some of the butter, you struggling to scoop some of it until Taehyung reached out for the block. “Here, let me do it and you whisk.” 
“No, you’ll end up putting in too much. Let me do it.” You nudged him with your elbow, picking at the butter. 
“But you’re already whisking, just let me take it out.” Taehyung protested as he reached, though you blocked him right away.  
“No, Tae, remember we decided I’m on baking and you’re on decorating?” 
“Your job is way harder than mine and I’m useless right now, let me at least whisk.” Taehyung grabbed for the bowl until you snatched it away from him, already done with scooping the butter when the action caused some of the flour to fly up on your dress, gasping scandalously. 
“Taehyung!” You whined, Taehyung scrambling for a quick apology. 
“Oh fuck, Y/N, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” Taehyung almost completed until a splash of flour went hurtling onto his shirt, causing him to look down with his mouth agape. “You did not just throw flour on my black turtleneck.” 
“You got flour on my black dress first, you tree.” Your eyebrows were set hard as you scolded him, still loosely whisking away at the cookie dough. 
“It was by accident, you half-pint.” Taehyung rebutted, trying to bat the flour off himself.
“Then mine was an accident too.” You mocked him, unsuspectingly whisking again when flour suddenly hit your chest, offended to find Taehyung snickering with it all over his hand. 
“That was an accident, too.” 
“You’re so...” You huffed out as you placed the bowl down and grabbed your own handful of flour, just about to throw it on Taehyung when is large palms came up to snatch your wrists, forcing your arms back as he snickered. 
“Taehyung, this is unfair!” You complained, struggling against his hold. 
“It’s an accident.” Taehyung mimicked with a genuine laugh watching you scramble in his hold, until the smile wiped off his face shortly after when you simply released the flour from your palm and it spilled all over his turtleneck. 
Your cheeks puffed up trying to contain your laughter, Jimin’s own giggling fit sounding and you remembered he was monitoring the competition. “Taehyung, you dumbass, you had that shit coming.” He held his stomach, entire body laughing at his best friend. 
You were giggling along with Jimin until Taehyung had had enough, licking his lips with mischief. 
“That’s it, come here.” He then spun you around and engulfed you with his arms from behind, holding you snug to his chest as you tried to escape him alarmingly, knowing what Taehyung was going to do next. 
“Taehyung please, wait, I beg of you, don’t!” And it was already too late when you felt his long fingers begin to tickle at your sides, your incessant protests melding with giggles along with his beautiful laughter filling the kitchen. 
You continued to fight against his hold, the constant feather-like touches making you reel and breath leave your lungs. “Taehyung, stop! Oh my God,” you struggled through a laugh while he nuzzled his face into your hair. “I’ll die, Taehyung, please!” 
“Nope, this is what you get.” Taehyung continued his onslaught as he held you tighter, you beginning to acquiesce in order to reason with him.  
“Okay, okay, look. We’re running out of time!” You tried controlling your laughter, tears pricking at your eyes as you tried to calm down. “We have to beat Hobi and Ah-yeong or else we’ll lose!” 
His amused voice sounded near your ear, still reprimanding you. “I’ll only stop if you say sorry.” 
“Alright, I’m sorry!” You were grabbing at his wrists for release. “I didn’t mean it, just stop tickling me!” You protested with a giggle until you felt his fingers rest, rather exchanging it for simply encasing you. 
“Good girl, you’re getting on Santa’s nice list.” Taehyung joked. 
You could only sigh as you resupplied oxygen to your lungs, moving towards the bowl. “Okay, let’s get back to work before we lose.” You puffed out air, breaths levelling as you returned to the counter and grabbed the whisk and bowl, only to find Taehyung hadn’t retracted his arms yet. 
He instead remained behind you, reaching for the utensils in your hands, his large ones grasping them along with you and the contrast of his broad body enclosing your smaller one made you feel something in your core.
Your eyes widened in surprised when his head unexpectedly found your shoulder, resting his chin there as he peered down at the bowl before you, you sputtering. “Taehyung, w-what are you doing?”
“Helping you, is there a problem?” The deep cadence of his voice was just by your ear, dangerous for your health. 
“N-no. But it’s okay, I’m fine on my own-” 
“Nope, this is the least I can do for you..” Taehyung’s tone seemed to trail off suddenly, having calmed down from his laughter and you found him speaking in earnest. “You’re my Christmas present I dragged all the way here with me, remember?” 
You could only smile sympathetically as you looked to your side, eyes welcomed by his gorgeous side profile on full display just centimeters from you. It made you realize just how close he was, his warmth engulfing you and it caused little sparks to fly inside your chest.  
“It’s not so bad, Taehyung. You’re just a good boy who needed his little Christmas present.” You teased light-heartedly, proud of your remark until Taehyung suddenly turned towards your ear, ghosting the shell of it with an unexpectedly darker tone, low and down right gruff.
“I’m not always a good boy.” He stated it simply, though the hot baritone in his words oddly left your spine cold, freezing over even more when Taehyung then wrapped his arms entirely around your torso, pulling your back to his chest. He did it so tightly you could suddenly feel your ass pressed to his covered length, oddly contradicting how couple-like you two probably appeared and it was goddamn intoxicating. 
You panicked at first but eventually basked in his hold, mustering the courage to speak with a suggestive tone. “I’m not always a good girl, either.” 
You threw it out there, cheeks slightly heating adding your own double entendre, though the way Taehyung suddenly tensed for a second had you feeling more confident, the puff of air he sucked in apparent. 
The conversation only ended with a satisfied hum from Taehyung as he watched you bake, a nice rumble that reverberated from his chest and into your back, feeling an odd arousal spike all the way down to your toes. 
It was already lethal with his pretty hands holding around your waist, the closeness an added thrill. It made your chest fill with something riveting, almost anticipatory of what all of this meant between you two, excited for wherever this night would truly go. 
It wasn’t long before it came time for Taehyung to plate and decorate the cookies, carefully placing his little embellishments he swore were the cream of the crop as you bickered with him, your incessant teasing resulting in you hugging him from behind while he worked. 
And Taehyung knew he was doomed the second he felt your very obvious chest press into his back, his nerves pumping carnally as he then felt a side of him he’s always hid from you escape its reigns. 
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It was damn transparent Seokjin and his girlfriend would win, their exquisite baking and cooking skills having created masterpieces everyone dug into happily. It’d won them the choice of what movie everyone would watch tonight along with a dinner that the losers, surprisingly not you and Taehyung, but Namjoon and his date would have to pay for. 
Everyone was now seeking comfortable positions for the movie around the TV while you were last minute cleaning with Jimin in the kitchen, offering your help after the mess you and Taehyung made with your little flour mishap. 
Taehyung had properly gotten rid of the flour on his sweater, now lounging on an armchair in the living room with his phone in hand. You felt yourself glancing towards him more than you should’ve, reprimanding yourself each time though found yourself doing it nonetheless. 
It was just hard to keep your eyes off him when Taehyung was the epitome of a Greek God, questioning how such a being is allowed to walk among us commoners. His chiseled jawline was far too handsome for his own good, his neck sculpted so perfectly it left you you wondering what it would feel like to mark him up all over, and the way his long legs were manspreading before him was so inviting the sight alone made you figuratively drool. 
And fall even harder. 
You didn’t realize you were ogling until Jimin’s hushed voice pulled you out of your reverie. “You’re staring.” 
You blinked. “What?” 
Jimin chuckled as he continued to wipe the counter one last time. “It’s been 6 years, why don’t you just say something?” 
“There’s nothing to say, Jimin.” You tried brushing him off, though Jimin didn’t buy it. 
“My ass, Y/N. You really think after what happened in the kitchen there’s nothing between you two?” 
“I don’t know, it’s just how Taehyung is.” You concocted an excuse, deflating as you did so.  
Jimin shook his head in disapproval. “It’s been like this since high school, Y/N, why didn’t you just tell Taehyung how you felt?” 
You looked at him in earnestly before softening into a sigh, knowing Jimin was really the only person you ever spilled your feelings for his best friend to. 
“Because I was scared, Jimin. You know how hard it was for me to even admit it to you.” You answered with a quiet voice, scrapping the flour you threw at Taehyung into the garbage. 
“But Y/N, you two... the way you are. What were you so afraid of?” Jimin’s sweet, pacifying voice asked, clearly having been rooting for you both ever since you fessed up. 
“Rejection, Mimi. Even if we’re like that...” You trailed, thinking over your relationship with Taehyung. “What if it’s all only a joke on his end? Taehyung has always been naturally flirty.. and we’re friends. I don’t think I’m any different than a conquest.” 
Jimin understood your point, though made it his own to advise you otherwise, washing out the cloth in the sink. “Y/N, that’s only what you believe.” His eyes told you of genuine support, offering like the comfort fairy he’s always been. “Just because you believe something, doesn’t make it true.” 
And that damn well hit home for you, realizing that maybe you’ve really been in your head too much about this, overthinking by creating doubts and excuses in your head to subdue your fear of confessing to Taehyung, to avoid the hurt of rejection but possibly missing an entire opportunity. 
“You should tell him, Y/N. It’s been long enough, you’ll never know how he feels if you don’t try.” 
You became apprehensive. “But how do you know if he’ll feel the same way?” Jimin could only chuckle to himself, his smile radiant as he found you the most innocent, yet funnily oblivious thing on Earth. 
“Look at the way he acts around you, Y/N.” Jimin advised. “He’s my best friend, and I’ve never seen him like that with anyone except you. Conquests are conquests, but you’re you, and that’s different to him.” 
Your mind instantly went into a frenzy, thinking well fuck, Jimin is Taehyung’s best friend, and he’s telling you that all this time Taehyung has never really enacted the same behaviour and energy with anyone expect you? This whole time? What does he mean you’re different? You’re.. different to him? Aren’t you just his female friend he’s known since ninth grade, and so surely there’s nothing but the added value of history there, right? 
Right?
You were only left to digest Jimin’s words as you placed the dustpan back to its original spot, Jimin finishing up with the sink. The conversation ended there, Jimin guiding you back to the living room and nestling himself next to his date. You were distracted with Jimin’s suggestions until you walked into the space and realized there was nowhere for you to sit, the couples perfectly paired up and occupying all the available space. 
Your entrance is what made Taehyung snap his vision to you from his phone, watching your confused face contemplating where to sit until he whispered to you, motioning towards himself on the armchair furthest from the screen and tucked behind the other couches. “Y/N, come here.” 
You studied his placement, on a singular armchair with his lap very much open. You shivered at the sight, though protested in a hushed tone realizing the chair could really only fit him. “There’s nowhere for me to sit.” 
Taehyung then spread his legs a little further apart and tapped his thigh, revealing some space for you to sit.. on him. “You can sit here.” 
You were glad the lights were turned off, just so Taehyung didn’t have to see the blush that rose to your cheeks when you answered. “Um, o-okay.” 
You then ambled over to him in front of the rather comfy looking armchair, thanking God everyone was too distracted bickering over Seokjin’s movie choice to pay attention to you both. 
“Are you.. sure about this?” You managed to get out, mind going feral over the fact that one of your previous thoughts was actually manifesting itself, nearly chickening out. 
“Mhm, just sit on me.” Taehyung offered casually, his expression unreadable and ultimately making you doubt Jimin’s advice from before, realizing that Taehyung has always been a hard person to read, which is why you could never tell how he felt about you, shutting your trap about damn love confessions. 
You didn’t respond and rather tentatively made it to the take your seat, the seat that was Taehyung’s fucking lap. You placed your ass on his thigh with your legs thrown over him, angling yourself so that the temple of your head rested against his shoulder. 
Though it proved to be lethal in seconds, his cologne now completely flooding your nostrils and the thin skirt of your dress leaving much of your clothed core feeling the muscle of his thigh. 
You felt Taehyung tense underneath for a second as you adjusted the skirt of your dress over your own thighs, smoothing it over properly as your hands then clasped in your own lap. 
Taehyung was glad you didn’t have the ability to read his mind, because the second he realized everyone was naturally pairing up to cuddle with their dates, it would only mean you two would have to do the same. So when you paddled over, standing before him in that cute dress he’s been wanting to tear off you this entire party, he was more than thrilled to offer his lap as your seat. 
But when you actually sat on him, your ass and hints of your core against his thigh with your tempting legs draped over him, he was continuously beginning to think dangerously, salaciously. 
He tried to keep his breathing leveled, though the second he felt you adjust against him and your covered center press onto him, he knew he would never survive whatever fucking movie everyone eventually settled on. 
When it finally began to play, Taehyung snaked his arms around your waist and held you to him, feeling your breath hitch for the tiniest second before you relaxed. 
And it damn well thrilled him. 
The movie was beginning to progress now, Taehyung and yourself in the same comfortable position until you yawned and snuggled more into him, a hand coming up to drape across his chest and head finding shelter closer into his neck. 
Taehyung tensed again, feeling every breath you took with the weight of your smaller body on top of him, mind racing with thoughts he couldn’t keep quiet anymore. 
And especially when you shifted your ass a little against his leg, he twitched with something so much more carnal, blood pumping somewhere it shouldn’t and this time, Taehyung didn’t really feel like holding back anymore. 
His hands suddenly faltered, his palms coming to singularly rest against one of your thighs, clasping it slightly. He knew there was nothing but your leg with only pantyhose as a barrier for your skin, sending currents through his veins thinking you could definitely feel his every touch. 
You nearly jolted when Taehyung’s hands met the meat of your thigh, the placement shooting more arousal through you than it should’ve. 
You were calm until Taehyung suddenly inched his hand towards the inner part of your thigh, making your core clench and hand clutch his sweater to contain the electricity it sent. 
You’ve always had such dirty thoughts about what Taehyung’s hands could do, the slenderness and length of his fingers always revving your imagination. So to have his fingers just on the inside of your thigh, sitting in his lap as he seemed to be teasing, was enough to send your brain spiraling. 
Your scandalous thoughts made you shift against him to experimentally feel the friction, your core grinding against his thigh for a moment and Taehyung’s breath immediately hitched. His grip on you tightened and his hold tensed, had you suppressing the feeling of making a sound. 
He slid more inward, closer to the prize he was seeking and you could only hide your face into the junction of his neck at the way your pussy felt butterflies. It made you squish your thighs together to feel something, and God fuck, was the tension between you two so searing you could feel it radiating off Taehyung’s body. 
It’s what made whispering slowly against him flow easily, quiet so as not to alarm anyone in the living room. 
“I thought you were a good boy, Tae. What are you doing?” Your voice was sultrier than you planned, and it wasn’t chastising him at all, rather teasing for something more. 
You could only feel the rise and fall of Taehyung’s chest underneath you as he contained himself, the cuddling leaving you to feel his every micro-movement when he responded. 
“I thought you were a good girl, what are you doing?” Taehyung’s voice was low and deep, the vibration coursing through your body and it only invited you to become hornier. 
“Guess I’m not a good girl after all.” 
Taehyung made a sound as though scoffing, dangerous in its tone. 
“Guess I’m not a good boy, either.” And just after, Taehyung inched his fingers even closer to your clothed core, making the slightest of contact on your slit through the material of your dress and you practically twitched in his hold, sucking in a breath as you clasped onto the fabric of his shirt. 
“You have no idea..” Taehyung suddenly spoke up, voice laden with something hungry, hot. “what I’ve always thought about doing to you.” 
You could only jolt in his lap, more of his cologne meeting your nose and it caused you to suppress a sound by stuffing your face into his neck. “What.. have you thought about?” 
Taehyung then suddenly cupped your sex over your clothes, making you grapple onto his neck and bite back a moan so hard you had to breathe through your nose. 
“How I want to ruin you.” Taehyung’s low baritone and rough palm rubbing teasingly against your now aching pussy left you gushing, arousal racking the bottom of your stomach you were almost afraid of how easy it was for him. 
Your breath was shallower now, trying to compose yourself by egging him on. “You’d want to ruin an innocent girl like me?”
“I know you’re not innocent, princess.” Taehyung asserted with the slightest growl to his tone, thankful your seat was positioned behind the rest of the others so nobody could see what was going on. 
“Only when it comes to you.” Your seductive voice beckoned lust to course through Taehyung, breathing out hot air. “What else?” You suddenly croaked out. 
Taehyung hummed lowly into your ear, his palm smoothing over your cunt in ways that had you screwing your eyes shut. “How I want to make you beg.” He purposefully pressed harder against your clit, had you scratching into the column of his throat. “Make you scream my name.”   
You gushed your arousal even more, breathless with your words. “I bet you say that to everyone.”
Taehyung chuckled dismissively, dipping his head lower to whisper darkly into your ear. 
“I only say that to pretty little things I want to ruin, and you’re the prettiest little thing I know.” 
Your breath came out in a weighty puff, sighing satisfyingly against him as you snaked your hand from his neck down to the hardening length in his pants. You grazed your palm over his clothes and he twitched almost violently, biting back his hiss with a strong grip against your thigh with his free hand. You grew proud, speaking up when it boosted your ego. 
“I’d love to see you try.” 
And that was when the pads of Taehyung’s fingers pressed into your clothed cunt so euphorically you were seconds from letting out a moan, Taehyung cupping his palm over your mouth to silence you. 
“Shh.” Taehyung sounded by your ear. “Can’t let everyone hear my girl, now can I?” He hushed you huskily, leaving you to sigh your arousal into his large palm and eternally grateful the movie’s volume was loud enough to mask your talking.
Taehyung then began the slowest circular ministrations on your clit, shooting continuous pleasure through your body as you clutched your hand onto his wrist holding your mouth, urgently trying to suppress moans he was easily milking out of you. 
It felt like sparks, continuous sparks in your covered pussy as Taehyung rubbed against your folds, gliding down to your slit and teasing your throbbing hole. 
The mere prospect of his fingers shoving inside you made you wet beyond comprehension, only digging little crescents into his forearm with muted moans. It was sickening how easily he had you turned on, how easily you were getting riled up by just his fingers, and so you mustered the strength to lightly stroke his cock over his pants as revenge.
Taehyung then put pressure against your clenching hole as punishment, shoving your face into his neck when he teased your entrance and squishing his hand between your thighs with his other urging them open. 
“Look at you,” Taehyung growled. “all fucked out just by my fingers.” He whispered darkly into your ear, the vibration of his baritone voice once again sending you into overdrive. “They’re not even inside you yet.” 
The ‘yet’ had you restless, body grinding against him and this time it was Taehyung trying suppress a satisfied groan. 
“If my fingers have you like this, imagine my-” 
“Oh c’mon! That’s not even realistic!” Seokjin suddenly shouted at the screen, startling you and Taehyung. 
“Jin, calm down. It’s just a feel-good Christmas movie.” Yoongi cautioned him. 
“How the fuck does the kid just free the burglar from the cop car? It’s damn common sense.” Seokjin complained about the scene from Christmas with the Kranks, having been unsatisfied with the movie since the beginning. 
“Baby, why’d you choose this movie?” He whined to his girlfriend Sa-Ha, her feigning innocence as she defended herself. 
“It’s almost over, Jinnie. Just sitand watch.” 
And that’s when Taehyung ripped his hands off you, leaving you to breathe out ruggedly for a few seconds before your vision looked up at Taehyung’s, mutually shocked at what the fuck just happened.
You’ve never done something like that before, and as your scared sights looked back at each other, you could only think you were both under some sort of horney trance that swept you two into uncharted waters. 
It made you divert your eyes from Taehyung immediately, your mind going blank. 
Taehyung was left hard and extremely turned on, though began dissipating once he couldn’t fathom he went that far with you so quickly, his brain having been clouded by lust he should’ve kept in check.
And with the way you looked at him, panicked and snapping your vision away in an instant, he doesn’t know if he just made a grave mistake. 
You both became shameful, swallowing dryly as your attentions fixated back onto the screen, thinking about what just transpired. 
There was this incessant feeling in both your chests contemplating there was something more, clearly more between you two. 
And it was downright fearful. 
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“Yah, why are you guys leaving so early? C’mon! There’s still half the eggnog left.” Seokjin pouted from across the room, sadly chugging his drink as the others hummed in agreeance. 
“Yeah, c’mon guys. It’s the holidays, let’s all spend it together, sleep over for the fuck of it!” Hoseok chimed in what you could tell was an inebriated state, practically swaying as he talked and the lilt in his tone ever-so cheery. 
“Um, excuse me? Sleep over? Nobody’s doing that.” Jimin shoot him down from where he stood near you and Taehyung, scolding his friends with crossed arms. “If they want to leave they’re allowed, we already made Y/N abandon her Christmas for us.” 
“It’s alright, Jimin. I missed you guys too, I wanted to come.” You offered sentimentally, hand touching his elbow to let him up and he eased. 
“Since you’re officially back in town, we’re never leaving you alone again, Y/N!” Namjoon called out from the living room, engrossed in whatever was playing on the TV. 
“Yup, seriously not going to leave you alone.” Yoongi hummed with half-lidded eyes, near falling asleep on the couch. 
“I still owe you for those math notes, expect me becoming your Genie for a day!” Jungkook called out from the kitchen, most likely munching on the treats everyone crafted during the competition earlier. 
“Of course, I’ll see you guys! Merry Christmas!” 
“Merry Christmas!” Everyone cheered, their dates similarly adding on. 
You then brought your attention back to Jimin, seeing you and Taehyung out as the wonderful host of today’s party. “Thank you for the party, Jimin, it was amazing.” 
“Yeah.” Taehyung perked up next to you, apologetic he was so negligent of the party in the first place. “It was seriously fun, Jimin, I’m sorry I acted like it wasn’t a big deal before.” 
“Nah, don’t sweat it.” Jimin casually waved him off. “Dude, you could text me a Merry Christmas and I’d be alright, you know us.” Jimin smiled reassuringly, right on your toes when Taehyung and yourself stepped into his front foyer.  
You were both fixing on your shoes just before Jimin’s door when he spoke up again. “It was great having you guys, and even better having you, Y/N, come here.” Jimin held out his arms for a warm hug, you returning it merrily. “You’re always welcomed here with us, visit anytime you want.”
“Thanks, Jimin, it really means a lot.” Your grateful eyes found his once you disconnected. 
“We’ll get going now, thank you again, Jimin.” Taehyung for some odd reason placed an arm around your shoulder, pulling you two a little closer and you simply accepted the action, trying not to read into it. 
“Of course.” Jimin replied. “Though one last thing, you remember the theme of this party, right?” Jimin asked you both, you and Taehyung similarly responded with knitted eyebrows. 
“Yeah?” 
“Well look up, lovebirds.” Jimin cocked his head upwards towards the ceiling, casually leaning against the corridor of his entrance when you and Taehyung glanced up, innocently viewing the little mistletoe dangling above your heads, eyes reflecting the realization of what Jimin was conveying. 
“I’ll leave you two alone.” Jimin added with a purposefully hushed, knowing tone. He was just about turning away until he called out in caution. “Oh, careful driving, by the way. I just heard the snow got bad.” And with that, Jimin left nothing but his sweet cologne in the air when he disappeared.
You and Taehyung shuffled about a little, not exactly daring to exchange gazes when the air became all stuffy. 
You were both mutually pondering what the absolute hell to do in this moment. Do you kiss? Do you not kiss? Do you awkwardly try to address what happened earlier after silently agreeing with your dicey body language to never speak of it again? Or hell, do you damn well take Jimin’s advice and just flat out tell him you’ve always had feelings for him? 
Wait. 
Jimin’s advice. 
It came back to you, thinking Jimin was actually extremely wise in what he said. You took to his words into consideration, studying some of the little things Taehyung did around you, from the things he uttered all the way down to the simple way he even looked at you, contemplating something, just something had to be there.
But then maybe, just maybe you could also chalk it up to his naturally flirtatious behaviour you’ve always observed, always habitually affectionate with people and that’s what’s always made him so easily lovable in the first place, what made Taehyung a boy who was born to be loved. 
And he was tricky, his expressions and feelings always indistinguishable with the composed, nuanced way he carried himself especially now, convincing you reading him was a lost cause. 
Though as you glanced at Taehyung right now, visibly nervous, his usually schooled face and unreadable expression now indicating nerves, awkwardness you two have never really experienced between each other before, you decided maybe you should stop making excuses. 
Stop avoiding signs and doubting his every move and burying your feelings so deep underground, that maybe you should just fucking take your leap of faith already. 
So you stepped closer to him, your figure almost laughably smaller compared to him, and watched as his pretty eyes brightened in surprise at you. 
It only took a few seconds, for your lips to curve reassuringly, for your soft hands to cup his face delicately against the edge of his sharp jaw. To get on the tip of your toes and bring your lips to Taehyung’s, pressing a heartfelt kiss to mouth. 
A kiss so very soft and tender, it was like teenagers kissing for the very first time, and it made you giggle on the inside, thinking that’s exactly how your entire ordeal has felt like; your two teenage selves trying to navigate whatever feelings lied between you. 
Taehyung was shocked, having been silently berating himself for being too bold too quickly and thinking his abandonment of chivalry in that instance was wrong, the air between you having been tainted with a sense of unspoken, though apparent awkwardness for the rest of the party. 
But now, now you were kissing him, and for the first time, his insides leaping at just the prospect. It felt like a damn dream, though the press of your mouth against his confirmed it was in fact real, that it was gladly his sweet reality. 
That after years of imagining what it would feel like, he’s kissing the girl he’s loved since the second he saw her hair glow in the rays of the sunset, the minute he realized she wasn’t just pretty, but beautiful to him, the hour he’d witness the moonlight kiss her skin when she stayed up with him on sleepless nights, leading all the way up to the year he realized she’d leave him, so soon, so fucking soon it absolutely crushed him. 
And Taehyung wouldn’t admit it you, but your departure left his heart ravaged for quite possibly years, continuously overthinking how different things would’ve been if he just told you. Told you how he felt, told you that behind every innuendo, behind every hug, every tease, every stupid smile he flashed your way, that there was love behind it all. 
Pure, unadulterated love. 
He regretted it for months, for years thinking he’d truly lost the greatest opportunity in his life having let you go without protest, without fighting for you like he should’ve. 
It hurt, it hurt until he’d eventually grown accustomed to the ache in his heart whenever he saw that same plaid pattern on anyone else, reminded of the jacket you wore to school everyday. The way he found himself subconsciously comparing nearly every girl he dated to you, how on rainy days and quiet nights, he sometimes wondered where you were, what you were doing, if you were awake at this time of night like he usually was, remembering the way the moonlight always seemed to love you, just like he loved you. 
And he still did, Taehyung thought. He still loved you, now feeling your lips kiss him, your adorable height making you tippy-toe, the gentle way you held his face comforting. 
Your lips then disconnected, Taehyung seeing your gaze was warm, something so reminiscent of affection, adoration in your eyes, and he thought in that one, singular moment that maybe, just maybe... 
You loved him too. 
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“Fuck, this snow is bad.” Taehyung swore as he gauged any clear path of the road ahead.
“I hate to admit this, but the group was right. It was probably better staying at Jimin’s.” You sighed, worried about the amount of damn white you were seeing blanket the world outside. 
“I thought if we left early we could escape it, but shit, mother nature is always so fickle.” He complained. 
“It’s her charm, unfortunately.” You shrugged, realizing there was truly no way for you to get home now. “It’s early too, the snow ploughs won’t clear the roads just yet.” There was suddenly a concerned lilt to your tone as you peered ahead, gripping Taehyung’s arm and it grabbed his attention. “It’s getting dangerous too, Tae. I don’t want you driving in this.” 
Taehyung was glad he had the gifted ability of hiding his emotions, because right now he would’ve been embarrassingly over the moon. He smiled back to you reassuringly, then contemplated an alternative.
“Would you.. rather come to my place?” Taehyung inquired, biting his lip once he realized he stupidly stuttered. 
You blinked. “What?” 
“Well, my place is much closer, and it’d be less dangerous driving there. You can just stay until they clear the roads.” Taehyung relayed casually, expectant eyes on you as his hands tapped against the steering wheel. 
Your face slowly turned into an appreciative smile, taken aback by his act of kindness, but also felt something exciting tickle the bottom of your stomach. 
“Sure, I’d love that.” 
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Taehyung shut the door of his apartment as you removed your boots, shredding stray snowflakes off his jacket when he spotted similar ones on yours, his hands naturally jutting out to rid the tiny icicles off you. 
You turned around at his touch, thanking him and he smiled a welcome back. He’d taken your jacket just like before and tucked them away into his closet, gesturing towards his living room for you to get comfortable. 
“Make yourself at home, do you want water or anything?” 
“Yeah, actually. Water would be nice.” Taehyung nodded as he made for his kitchen, you tucking the skirt of your dress underneath you as you took your humble seat on his couch. 
His home was so painfully Taehyung, it had you smiling like an idiot he was still the same. The same introspective Taehyung who adored art and photography, the same Taehyung who absolutely hated shoes and you could tell just by the way he abandoned them earlier he still had the same habit. Even to the way his house reflected this artistic, calming, and nuanced feeling he similarly had.
It drew you to admire some of the pieces draping his walls, when Taehyung returned with a glass of water, handing it to you as he plopped down on the couch. “Here.” 
“Thank you.” You took the glass, gulping down some of the liquid for your parched throat. 
“Your apartment is nice.” 
“Thanks.”
You then both sat in silence for a short while, tapping the edge of the glass in your hand as you scanned the rest of his charming home. The silence wasn’t awkward considering the past events of today, just a silence in its definition. 
“I still can’t believe I ran into you at a coffee shop.” Taehyung suddenly remarked, looking off at his table in front with a smile tugging his lips. 
You chuckled. “Why? Too meet-cute for you?” 
“No.” He chuckled too. “It’s just, I really thought it was the end when you left after graduation.” Taehyung paused for a poignant moment, air heavy with something as you watched him muster the courage to say something else. 
“I thought I’d never see you again.” 
He claimed it with such a sense of sadness, sense of longing that reminded you of how upset you also were that day, the rampant emotions that came crashing down realizing you were leaving behind an entire life. 
“Me too.” You added with a similarly downcast tone. “I thought I’d never see you again, either.” 
Taehyung then looked at you, eyes meeting your gaze. “I’m glad that wasn’t true.” Something lingered behind his words, something incredibly thick and telling, though you deflected it with a joke to lighten the air. 
“I’m glad you didn’t delete my PowerPoints, either.” You snickered, hand coming up to cover your mouth, “I used to put a lot of work into them.”
Taehyung scoffed playfully, smiling through a chuckle as he responded. “I didn’t have the heart to. You were so passionate about your hatred for fruit on pizza.” 
“I still am.” You added. “Do you really have them?” 
“Yeah, I do. Let me show you.” Taehyung then pulled out his phone from his pocket, clicking away on the device as he scooted closer to you and leaned in, you similarly doing so and peering at a Google Drive folder of your wonderfully crafted presentations.
“Oh my God, I thought you were joking.” You snorted, snickering at the hilarious folder name; ‘Y/N says Fuck Hawaiian Pizza: the Saga’
“Nope, couldn’t delete them even if I was dared to.” Taehyung laughed with you, both of your eyes naturally falling as he shut off his phone, the conversation shifting. 
“You know, I never actually hated it that much.” You admitted sheepishly. “I just liked annoying you and wasting 5 minutes of your day with every presentation.” 
Taehyung looked scandalized at first, mouth falling agape until he ultimately let it go, admitting something of his own. “You know, I never actually needed your history notes. I just liked being annoying about stealing them so you always had to chase me down.” Taehyung’s smile was suddenly impish, shy as he fixated on fiddling with his slender fingers. 
“After all that running I always did after you too? Jheez, you’re the reason I have strong calves now.” 
“And you’re the reason I’m really good at presentations now.” You both chuckled together, the old days coming back in bouts until your mood changed, remembering Jimin’s advice from earlier. 
As you looked at Taehyung, while he didn’t look at you, you could only help but find every reason in the world to listen to Jimin. Because Taehyung was Taehyung, he was the Taehyung that stole your heart with his boxy grin, the Taehyung who made every other man seem like an unappealing idiot you wanted nothing to do with, the same Taehyung who’s heart was made of love, and you wanted nothing but to return to him the love he gifted the world.
Because you loved Taehyung, no matter how much you’ll try to deny it, you still love him. All his smiles and giggles and soft hair and his sometimes coltish, though endearing ways of being himself. All his hard expressions and intimidating eyes and handsome looks and the way he holds a universe of stars in his old soul.  
So your next words flowed, flowed more fluently than anything ever has in your life. 
“You know,” You paused, eyes faltering to the glass in your hand. “I think, for the majority of high school... I had a crush on you, but I never said anything because I thought you wouldn’t want me.” 
And there came the silence, the piercing, God awful silence you were so afraid of and so sure was spelling your doom. You didn’t dare look up from your glass now, downright terrified he was probably pulling the most confused face ever, and his silence was deafening. It had you contemplating the best way to jump out his window, he was only, what, 14 stories up? A human can survive a fall that high, right? 
“You wanna know something?” Taehyung suddenly broke the silence, his deep, dulcet voice sounding beautifully in his apartment, and your eyes widened the second he opened his mouth next. 
“I think I was in love with you for the majority of high school, but I didn’t say anything because I thought you never felt the same way.” And that’s when everything clicked, when your eyes widened in revelation, when it suddenly felt like the 6 years you spent battling your feelings for him was nothing but a sad joke. 
Because this moment, alone, made you realize you two had the same hearts all along. 
“You wanna know something?” You swallowed hard, eyes still on your glass as it shifted in your hand mindlessly. “I think... I’m still in love with you.” 
You couldn’t see Taehyung, because you didn’t dare look at him at a time like this. You just sat there, breathing as leveled as you could until you felt Taehyung shift on the couch. He’d moved closer, closing the small gap between you both, beckoning you to finally look at him and that’s exactly what you did. 
He spoke low, deep and low and it had your toes curling at just how proximal he was, his beautiful eyes gazing at you like you meant the universe and more to him. 
And little did you know, you really did. 
“I think..” He started, gripping the glass of water from your hands and placing it onto his coffee table. “I’m still in love with you, too.” 
And your heart was set ablaze in a matter of seconds, your tentative eyes finding Taehyung’s as he leaned in, large palms on either side of your body as he inched closer, closer, and closer, until all he could see were your lips, jutting his face forward until his lips just brushed yours. 
You chased his mouth a little, fluttering your eyes shut and Taehyung couldn’t help but smile before finally, finally pressing his lips to yours. 
His mouth kissed you slow at first, slow and steady and it was intoxicating just like this. He constantly chased your lips, mouthing at them sensually and it was driving you insane, just the taste of his lips with a hint of wine on his breath shooting electricity to your core. 
His hands moved to your sides, wrapping around your rib cage as he leaned you back onto the couch and laid on top of you. His body covered you as far as you could see, your dainty hands coming up to find his jawline and pull him against your lips fervently.
He slowly grew more passionate, smoothing over your sides as he mouthed for more of you, swallowing the little moans you made that vibrated through his body and it only revved is engine more. 
Taehyung was taken, completely taken by how much he wanted you that he could only see you, could only think about all the dirty but soft and tender and passionate things he wanted to do to you. 
One of his hands travelled underneath your thigh, pulling your leg up against him as he pressed his hips into your core, his hardening cock prodding you through his clothes once he started a gentle rocking motion. 
Your hands travelled up his beautiful neck and tangled into his hair as you reciprocated. A slight tug left him groaning into your mouth, causing you to buck up into him harshly and it sent Taehyung’s mind into a dangerous place. 
His breathing elevated against you, gripping your ribs so urgently it only made you pull him closer, arch your chest into his just so you could relish in the feeling. Your heart was thrumming in your chest, veins coursing with adrenaline so white hot it wasn’t long before you were moving desperately with Taehyung and it fueled your horny nerves.
Taehyung suddenly disconnected his mouth from you, breathing so shallow his chest was rising and falling fast. He was only centimeters above as he looked down at you, his eyes boring into yours with such a prominent sense of longing, want, pure desire, it took him no time to speak. 
“Do you know how long..” He took a breath. “I’ve wanted to do that?” 
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted you to do that?” You replied, hands now smoothing over his shoulders to feel him, his body raging hot as he laid on top of you, looking at you like you were the only thing he ever wanted. 
“Fuck, we’re so stupid.” Taehyung quickly said before his mouth crashed onto yours. This time there was something carnal in his kiss, something urgent and hot and it only made you pull him closer for more. 
His tongue began to lick over your lips, slithering inside your mouth and the taste of him was euphoric, making you tangle your tongue with his just to taste him over and over again, until it was safe to say your tongues were down each other’s throats. 
He kissed you sloppily, kissed until he was consuming you, his fingers digging into your thigh and side so fervently you knew there’d be marks, and it made your spine shiver, even more so when he spoke again. 
“The minute.. I saw you in that dress..” He breathed out, kissing in between the exhaustion of his lungs. “I wanted to rip it off you.” 
You groaned desperately at his confession, wanting Taehyung in ways that were so utterly carnal, almost feral, your entire being wanting to consume every inch of him, lay a million kisses across his honey-coloured skin and hear his caramel voice whisper into your ear, and so it didn’t take long for you to voice your desire. 
“Taehyung..” You sighed, a satisfied lilt to your tone and it only lit Taehyung on fire. 
“Mm?” He hummed, licking into your mouth on a quest for everything inside, his hips now grinding into your clothed cunt so harshly he was practically dry humping you, and without a second thought you were moving yourself against him too, hands exploring his broad chest. 
“Taehyung..” You were more urgent, and it made Taehyung grunt harshly. “Rip it off me, Tae, unwrap me like you said you would.” You started harshly tugging at his offensive shirt, tracing the column of his throat as you relished in his delicious kisses. 
And it all made Taehyung move so much harder, so much more roughly you were moaning into his mouth at the press of his hard, long cock against your aching core. 
“Ruin me, Taehyung.” You scratched your nails against his neck, swallowing him into your mouth as you talked. “I want you to ruin me.” 
“Fuck,” Taehyung swore, his length beginning to prod you so much more apparently as you bucked your hips up into him, it was sending Taehyung down the proverbial hole. And when you let out another gorgeous moan of his name, he knew he was a goner. 
“Fuck, I can’t do this anymore.” 
Taehyung then harshly grabbed your wrists and forced them against the couch in a single motion, eyes growing dark with heat radiating of his body in waves. He darted to the underside of your jaw and kissed hard, began mouthing at your skin until he travelled to the junction of your neck, sucking over the sensitive skin so rampantly it had you squirming underneath him, desperately trying to feel him against your core. 
His pretty purple marks began blooming onto your neck, evidence of his raw desire for you, the years he spent longing for you. His teeth were nipping your skin, tongue licking over the bites as he pressed your wrists further into the couch the more you resisted. 
You breath hitched when he moved to the slightly exposed valley of your breasts, making your nipples harden at just the prospect of his mouth travelling there. You began fighting his hold, causing you to arch into him as something dawned on you. 
“Taehyung.. your shirt.” You whined, trying to manage the pleasure of his mouth canvasing your skin. 
Taehyung left you for a mere second to shred off the annoying piece of clothing, tossing it aside as he returned to you urgently, your legs hooking around his torso as he came back to you. 
His mouth was sucking hickeys onto your chest again when his hands began to smooth down your sides, so sensually purposeful until he reached underneath the hem of your dress, hooking onto the waistline of your pantyhose and panties, tugging teasingly. 
Your core ignited at just his touch against bare skin, gushing as your hips harshly grinded against his body and your hands smoothed over the lean muscle of his body. 
He yanked the pieces of clothing down the curve of your ass, proceeding to pull them past your thighs as you unhooked your legs to help take them off you. 
The rush of the cold against your wet pussy lips made your breath hitch beautifully, one of Taehyung’s hands moving your skirt to let his large, warm palm cup your sex so pleasurably the contrast of the size of his hand and your little cunt sent you both ablaze. 
“You’re so small, think you can take me, good girl?” Taehyung breathed against your chest. “I’ll fuck up your insides.” His baritone voice was dark and low as he warned you, sent arousal spiking through your nerves as you groaned. 
“Fuck up my insides, Tae.” You desperately moaned out, hands finding Taehyung’s hair as he continued to lay searing kisses to your hot skin, his fingers rubbing your dripping folds harshly. “I just.. I need you, Taehyung, so fucking badly.” 
“Say it again.” Taehyung hissed, exposing one of your bare breasts from your dress and pressing his tongue against a perched nipple, the wet sensation so satisfying you were scratching his shoulder blades. 
“I-I need you, Taehyung.” 
“Need me where?” He growled as he pressed against your clit and circled it, collecting your slick and spreading it all over yourself. 
And it was hard, so fucking hard to think straight with your bare, soaking wet pussy was rubbing against Taehyung’s rough fingers and his lips sucking your exposed nipple for dear life, the pleasure burning inside you so hot your voice was coming out in choked moans. 
“Need you inside, Taehyung.” You gasped out. “So empty without you, so fucking empty, for so long.” 
“God, fuck.” Taehyung groaned proudly, popping off your breast to look at your half-lidded eyes, his own blown out with his hair mussed and lips swollen pink. He returned to your lips again as his hands simultaneously hooked underneath your thighs and suddenly lifted you off the couch, your legs secured around his torso as he walked you into what you assumed was his bedroom. 
Your core rubbed against the buckle of Taehyung’s belt as he walked and you gushed oceans, the cool metal providing such delicious friction you were moaning satisfyingly into Taehyung’s mouth, grinding against him for more. 
His kiss was fervent even when he splayed you onto his covers, back hitting the bed as you stroked your hands over his beautiful bare chest. 
Taehyung suddenly came off you, eyes going wild as he looked down at your panting figure underneath him, then your offensive dress. 
“Fuck this thing.” Taehyung nearly ripped it from your body, shredding the pretty fabric off and simply basked in the glory of seeing your naked body for the very first time. 
Taehyung’s eyes filled with pure wonder, the moonlight and reflection of white snow falling outside adding a glow to your skin he couldn’t help but marvel at, your curves so beautiful he wanted to run his hands all over, the purple of his marks left on you only making him blossom with more arousal, more passion. 
“Holy shit, you’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.” Taehyung’s face was so blown away, you couldn’t help but grow a little shy, bringing him close to you by his neck so you could breathe into his ear. 
“Good, I hear you ruin them.” 
Taehyung could only smirk, rolling his tongue on the inside of his cheek, cock twitching at just your words. “You’re gonna be the death of me.” 
Taehyung trailed one hand down your body, momentarily wrapping it around your throat until it was gliding over your nipple and down to your core, lining the lips of your pussy so teasingly you were reeling. 
The pads of his fingers smoothed over your pussy lips again, applying pressure to your clit that had you lurching, until he used the opportunity to slide two fingers into your aching hole with ease. 
“You’re so fucking wet, dripping all over my fingers.” He growled into your ear as he laid himself on top of you, his free hand holding your face while the other worked your core. 
The sharpness of his long, slender fingers were euphoric, causing you to moan loudly. You could see his hard dick pressing against the fabric of his slacks almost painfully, and you jutted your hand out to begin palming him generously. 
Taehyung could finally hiss as loud as he wanted, screwing his eyes shut in sheer pleasure. 
He began pumping you faster in response, sliding in and out so deliciously you were moaning incessantly against his mouth as he began kissing you again. Your breasts were pressing into Taehyung’s bare chest the more you arched yourself, closing the offensive gap between you both and the skin to skin contact sending you both to cloud nine. 
“Taehyung..” You moaned in between kisses, so shameless about your desire for him you only wanted to know his name. 
“Taehyung.” 
“Fucking hell, that does shit to me.” Taehyung began thrusting harshly into your hole now as punishment, practically finger-fucking you against his bed till it made your walls clamp down on him, trap his slender fingers inside so you could feel every heavenly inch of them.
You became hungry for more, your hand grabbing at Taehyung’s straining cock harder and the strangled groan that left his lips was so fucking beautiful, your insides were screaming. 
“Shit, Taehyung,” You moaned out breathlessly. “You’re so hot like this, so fucking hot. Fuck me, fuck me like you said you would. ” 
Taehyung’s breaths turned heavy and hungry, his cock aching to be inside you so painfully he was going insane at your every word. 
“Fuck. I’m fucking you into next week. I’m fucking you until you only know my name. Fucking you until you know how badly I’ve wanted you, until your legs are shaking and you feel me in your throat.” 
“Then do it.” You nearly cried out, hands fumbling with the waistband of Taehyung’s pants. Your pussy was aching so excruciatingly around Taehyung’s fingers your slick was gushing from you, all over him and it only made Taehyung feral thinking about what would happen if it were his dick instead. 
“Fucking do it, Taehyung, fuck me until I’m shaking.” 
Taehyung flipped his switch and suddenly shoved his fingers so deep inside you, scissoring you completely open it made you lurch up in searing pleasure. His large palm grabbed underneath your head and positioned you upwards, able to angle his fingers so he could smash them inside you so harshly it was pathetic it wasn’t even his dick that had you high, but just his fingers. 
“Holy fuck, Taehyung!” 
“Cum all over my fingers, pretty. I wanna hear you.” Taehyung growled into your ear, couldn’t help but think about your walls convulsing around his dick and it was euphoric hearing you moan, all fucked out underneath him. 
He couldn’t stop finger-fucking you like his life depended on it, wanted to fill you up in so many ways you’d remember him for weeks. 
You were almost there, the edge so close. It was racking the bottom of your stomach, had your toes curling and walls pounding so snug around Taehyung’s fingers you could only latch onto the nape of his neck for dear life. 
You felt it, felt it so near and had his name leaving your mouth in such an intoxicating mantra you were seconds from letting go. Seconds, milliseconds, just about to release your impending orgasm until Taehyung ripped his fingers out of you. 
You gasped scandalously at the loss, body buzzing with your unachieved high it made your exclaim come out in a garbled protest.  “Taehyung, what the fuck?!” 
You tried getting an answer, but Taehyung’s hungry, half-lidded eyes shut you up immediately, watching him lick his fingers like he was starved, like this was the sweetest honey he’s ever tasted. 
“Fuck, you taste as sweet as you look.” Taehyung’s grin was evil, and it made you turned on but pissed he denied your orgasms. 
“You’re so-” You attempted to get out, but Taehyung suddenly flipped you onto all fours in a second, your hands and knees anchored onto the bed with only your shocked figure confused. 
“T-Taehyung, what are you-” You then sighed at the sudden touch of his tongue meeting your weeping hole in a devilish swipe. It was intoxicating, feeling his wet muscle begin licking into your core and tasting your soaked folds from behind. 
“I’m doing what you asked..” His voice was dark and weighty, and that’s when you suddenly felt another sensation of his two fingers returning to your throbbing entrance. Your insides buzzed when he spoke against your core, grittier than he ever has all night. “I’m going to fucking ruin you.” 
And his tongue suddenly slithered into your hole when he removed his fingers, licking into your entrance in a harsh rhythm as his palms began grabbing at your ass, kneading the meaty flesh as he straight up devoured your pussy like it was the only thing he’s wanted his entire life. 
His tongue was lapping you fervently, so starved your dissipated orgasm was coming back again. You were winded, having never been eaten out like this and you were moaning his name loud enough to get noise complaints filed to the police. 
“Taehyung!” You cried out, though he didn’t let up. Instead he brought one of his hands to your pulsing clit, circling and applying so much necessary pressure you were losing your mind, insane off the fact he hadn’t even filled you up with his cock yet and you were pathetic underneath him. 
“Fucking God, Taehyung, Tae!” And when he groaned so audibly into your pussy, rutting himself against the bed for friction it sent you flying, soaring into the sky and losing all coherent thought as your orgasm bubbled in your stomach, his husky voice grounding you to Earth. 
“Cum for me, baby, now.” And that was all it took to have you lurching over the edge, releasing your pent up orgasm so violently you were nearly screaming, Taehyung’s name the only distinguishable thing rolling off your tongue. 
He licked up your juices like they were fresh water, helping you ride out your euphoric orgasm and allowing yourself a moment to rest. You breathed, falling onto the bed in exhaustion, trying to quell the blood pumping in your ears when Taehyung suddenly pulled you back onto your hands and knees, cautioning you darkly when he spoke. 
“You thought we were done?” It was evil, he was evil, the way his voice sounded like the epitome of a smirk as you tried catching your breath. Taehyung’s lips then suddenly ghosted the shell of your ear as he wrapped an arm around your torso, pressing his chest to your back as he spoke. 
“I haven’t even done anything yet.” 
And again, it was the ‘yet’ that had you groaning out in frustration but in the best possible ways. How wasn’t this already enough? How did he have you so fucked out just by the sheer power of his fingers and tongue? It was sickening, he was sickening and you found yourself throwing your ass back on him to urge his cock into you already, to just fuck you open with all he had. 
“Taehyung, just-fuck! Fuck me, please.” You were pleading, needing to feel the wreckage of what you could tell was the biggest cock you’ll ever take.  
Taehyung had removed his pants and boxers in the moment, freeing his painfully angry cock from it’s confines. You were faltering from your position again when Taehyung suddenly prodded your abused hole with his engorged tip, you shuddering to life harshly. 
“Taehyung, just-” 
“Beg me.” 
You cried out in immediate desperation, his voice so authoritative it was sending you into submission, clutching the covers under you so hard your knuckles were white as you complied. “Taehyung, please, fuck me. I need you, please.” 
Taehyung’s arm was snug around your torso, feeling your every quaking expire in his hold and it was turning him on so agonizingly this was painful even for himself, but the way your sweet voice begged him was absolutely exhilarating.
“More.” 
“Taehyung, if you don’t fucking-!” You were cut off by the sharp impalement of Taehyung’s cock in a single breath, knocking all forms of wind out of you. The head alone was so large you went hurtling into the mattress, almost losing your shaking arms’ support until Taehyung pulled you back up for him, snaking his one hand that was previously around his cock to your breast while the other gripped at your hip. 
He was slowly sinking in, feeling your walls flutter open for him and the satisfied moan that left his mouth was evidence of how much this was affecting him. 
“Fuck...” Taehyung dragged out completely content, digging into your hip to watch you arch your back for him, on his knees as he filled you up from behind. “You’re so fucking tight and wet, holy shit.” 
You were struggling for air, oxygen leaving your lungs trying to accommodate for his monstrous size. It was unfair, so unfair he was so big and it had you praising him immediately, so full and stuffed it was the most pleasurable thing you’ve experienced all your life. 
“You’re so big, oh my God, Taehyung, so big.” One of your hands shot towards his holding you by your hip, interlacing your fingers together against your skin just to ground yourself, to manage the sharp pierce of his length until it simmered into a pleasurable burn. 
He bottomed out into your cervix and you both grunted loud, Taehyung containing himself just so he could feel your velvet walls palpitate around his throbbing dick. “Do you feel how hard I am, Y/N? Do you fucking feel it?” 
“Yes, God fuck! Tae, yes..” You sighed out, eyes watering at just how much pleasure was already raking your abdomen again. 
“That’s what you do to me, you barely touched me and this is how hard I am. How fucking badly I want you, how much I’ve always wanted you, wanted you since day one.” Taehyung’s voice was sincere and desperate, seemingly trying to counter your confession of your feelings from earlier.
“Show me, Taehyung.” You moaned, hands gripping his more affectionately, more desperately as you weakly held yourself up by the other. “Fuck me and show me how much you want me.” 
Taehyung grunted out harshly, pulling his cock out of you until he thrusted back in. The first thrust had you keening, sending you into the mattress only to have Taehyung pull you back up once again. Then the second came, your walls greedily soaking him into you and it felt perfect, like two puzzle pieces meant to connect with each other. 
Then came the third, the fourth, the fifth, all the way until Taehyung was pounding into you from behind with a drag so delicious you were moaning out more than you ever have in your entire life. 
And it was sickening, utterly sickening the way his dick began fucking you into the mattress so roughly, angling your body in ways for his cock to pump into all the right places with the right amount of pressure. He watched himself disappear into your little cunt repeatedly, holding your hip up to encourage you to arch so low your ass was snug against his pelvis, and couldn’t think of anything more fucking perfect. 
“You take me so well, so fucking well.” Taehyung praised, leaning over to aimlessly lay wet kisses up your spine like the demon he was, shoving himself into you over and over and over again with your walls convulsing around him.
You were trapping him inside you so tight he could spill into you in seconds, though held back determined he was making you cum again.
“So full, Taehyung, so deep.. all I feel is you.” The statement left you with a desperate sigh, your head hanging low until Taehyung’s hand kneading your breast suddenly wrapped around your throat, causing you to gasp at the arousing feeling. He pulled your head upwards, the junction between his long index finger and thumb forcing you to look forward, and you were utterly breathless at the scene.
His lips were near your ear in seconds, speaking like the devil incarnate as he was bent over you. “Look at us, look at yourself, so fucking pretty, so perfect.” You could suddenly see the reflection of Taehyung fucking into you from behind in his window, not even knowing tears had streamed down your face as his hand beautifully encased your throat, causing every nerve in your body to alight with fire. 
“Look at the way I fuck you, how much I love you.” Taehyung’s carnal eyes looked at you through the reflection of the window, heart twinging at the sight of you crying but knowing he’s making you feel good, continuing his onslaught of drilling your battered pussy. 
You moaned at the erotic scene, using every ounce of strength to keep yourself upright, your walls pulsing around Taehyung’s length as he thrusted harder and harder.
“Tae, fuck! I’ve always loved you, I always felt the same way, and I still do-ah!” Your lungs were tapping out when he suddenly shoved himself inside you to the brim, so utterly deep before he was thrusting again harshly, strangling out moans. 
Clear sweat was slick between your bodies, his huge, delicious cock incessantly tearing up your insides and all you could do was chant his name in pleasure, in bliss, in your love for him that was burning so bright it was nearly painful. 
“Y/N.. fuck. You’re ruining me. You’re so perfect, we’re so fucking perfect.” Taehyung was rambling at this point as his speed reflected his desperation, his immeasurable feelings for you. 
He was trying his damn hardest to distract himself from the release aching his balls. He was growing weak himself, feeling you reciprocate his rough thrusts by fucking him back the same way. And the image in the window? Had him reeling, needing to hear the most beautiful sound you’d make when you finally came, and he knew you would, bordering the precipice with the way your walls pulsed around him. 
Watching Taehyung fuck you in the window was now downright sinful to you, his harsh thrusts completely blissful and his hand gently squeezing at your throat was so dominant, so hot you were at your limit and ready to come. 
But what ended up sending you over, pushing you to release the tightening knot in your stomach was the sweet, tender way Taehyung began kissing your neck. 
The contrast between his cock abusing you and his plush lips kissing you so gently, so lovingly, it wasn’t long before you realized his fucking wasn’t just hard or rough, but full of sheer want, desire, love in all the right ways your walls were clenching around him rapidly in seconds. 
And when Taehyung angled himself somehow deeper, in that one, perfect spot, you clamped down and finally came so hard you saw stars, knew you’d completely drenched his cock with the loudest release of his name you were glad it was the only word you knew in this moment. 
“That’s it, baby. Just like that.” Taehyung breathed out in exhaustion, began soothing your abdomen with one hand and the other letting your head finally hang, grip loosened from around your throat and you could finally allow air back into your lungs. 
You were heaving when you spoke up, realizing something. “Inside me.. Taehyung.” You were dreary, utterly gone, but it still didn’t distract you from the blissful feeling of Taehyung’s cock deliciously stuffed and throbbing inside you, trying to coax his rightful release. “Cum inside me, Tae. Please, fill me up.” 
Taehyung didn’t need to be told twice when his cock worked a few more rough strokes into your tightened pussy and finally, finally came inside you. It was laced with a satisfied groan of your name, his grip on your side so intense you’d be glad if he left marks, wanting to remember every last bit of this night with Taehyung. 
He painted you completely white inside, spilling everything he could offer into you, using what little strength he had left to hold you up while he continued to empty his seed inside. Taehyung then lost all function and allowed you to fall, his broad body resting on top of yours as you both hit the mattress. 
Your chests rose and fell shallowly, completely taxed and having lost every ounce of strength. Taehyung’s hot breaths for air were fanning your neck, your arms sprawled out before you as Taehyung’s hands mindlessly interlaced with them against the tousled covers, cock still stuffing you whole. 
It was another moment of breathing and regaining oxygen when Taehyung suddenly kissed the side of your neck, giving your hands a small squeeze before you felt him lifting himself, his warmth disappearing and you panicked. 
“Where are you going?” Your throat was hoarse from screaming and moaning, a tinge of sadness to your tone as though he was leaving you, and Taehyung couldn’t help but find it endearing. 
“It’s okay, I’ll be right back.” He smiled, moving your hair from the side of your face to plant a kiss to your cheek, post-sex haze racking his brain though allowing reality to leak back into his mind. 
He then carefully, slowly pulled himself out of you, you whining at the loss of him and Taehyung smiled to himself in contentment, smoothing over your lower back with a palm in gratitude, before stepping towards his bathroom. 
He’d pulled his boxers back on and returned with a damp cloth, finding you still flipped and laying on your stomach, having dozed off in exhaustion until you felt Taehyung’s warmth and heard his dulcet voice hazing you awake. 
“Y/N, turn over for me.” His voice was hushed and tender, you complying by turning onto your back with his help. He then carefully swept the cloth against your battered core, you wincing a little with sensitivity and Taehyung made sure to clean more gently. 
The cloth was thrown back into his bathroom when he turned back to you, an arm thrown over your tear-stained face and the other clutching your body, clearly shivering in the cold now.
Taehyung easily scooped you into his arms and lifted you off the bed, carrying you over to his pillows and delicately placing you upon his duvet, pulling the covers out from underneath you and tucking you into his bed. 
You curled up into his blanket, Taehyung searching through his drawers for a stray t-shirt you could wear. He then lifted you into a sitting position, your eyes evidently sleepy and body limp as he pulled the shirt onto you, letting you fall back in place. 
Taehyung could only chuckle to himself thinking he did mean to ruin you, but not so harshly you were devoid of consciousness. He placed a little kiss to your forehead in apology, wiping some of the tears off your face before he rounded the bed, crawling in next to you.
His arms reached out to pull your back snug against his chest, feeling the sleep in the back of his eyes take him. He basked in the strawberry scent of your hair, completely gratified until you suddenly turned over towards him. 
His eyes shot open, only the top of your head coming into view as you nuzzled into his warm chest, your small self all tucked into Taehyung as he wrapped his arms around you like a safety net, holding you near.
And in that moment, all he could focus on was your light breathing, the sweet sound of your voice as you suddenly spoke in the dark of the night, moonlight glowing upon your entangled bodies. 
“I love you, Taehyung.” 
He grinned, the kind where he felt relieved, fulfilled, in a state of sheer bliss it was a moment before he replied, his own voice calm as you felt the hum through his chest, his hand tangled in your hair. 
“I love you, Y/N.” 
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The morning sun bled into Taehyung’s room, your eyes fluttering open at a time you had no concept of. You stirred, finding yourself still in Taehyung’s arm, in relatively the same position from last night. You didn’t even feel like moving from his hold, the feeling so utterly fuzzy and comforting. 
You basked in the sensation until he began to stir next to you, pretty eyelashes batting as his eyes fluttered open. His sights fell to you, eyes adorably taken by sleep while his soft hair was endearingly mussed by his pillow. You smiled at him warmly as he grinned back.
“Good morning.” you said shyly, nearly hiding underneath his covers. 
“Good morning.” 
You then flopped onto your back peering up at the ceiling, last night coming back to you in dream-like flashes you were surprised was somehow your reality. 
It was just miraculous, utterly unbelievable until Taehyung turning into your side and snuggling his face into your neck was evidence everything was real, that he was real. It wasn’t some remnant of a dream or hallucination, but the real Taehyung as his arm draped over your stomach. 
You had to bite your lip to contain your happiness, utter exuberance the universe had somehow finally paired you and him together, and funnily enough, on Christmas of all days. 
“What are you thinking about, princess?” Taehyung hummed into your collarbone inquisitively, half asleep as he cuddled you. 
You smiled, basking in his comfort. “Merry Christmas, Taehyung.” 
Taehyung chuckled against you, arm pulling you closer to him as he kissed your neck. “Merry Christmas, Y/N.” 
“Can you believe we met each other again during Christmas? It’s like the perfect Christmas miracle.” You marveled in wonder, tracing your finger along Taehyung’s pretty hand on your stomach. 
“I mean, you know what Andy Williams said..” He mused next to you, husky voice laden with sleep. “It’s the most wonderful time of the year.”
2K notes · View notes
whereisten · 4 years
Text
Devotion/Obsession
A Jaehyun fic that’s part of our Halloween Series!
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Summary: Jaehyun is new to town and wants you to show him around. But the truth is, he has known you for a while..
Pairing: Lucifer!Jaehyun x female reader
Other Characters: Husband!Kun
Genre: angst, smut, horror
Warnings: cursing, alcohol use, cheating, stalking, obsession, possessiveness, smut: breeding kink, unprotected sex, nipple sucking, size kink, fingering, oral sex (female receiving), multiple orgasms, c*eampie, pregnancy, character death.
Word Count: 8.9K
(A/N: okay ummm...this is influenced by stories told in the Bible, I hope I do not offend you with my interpretation, Jaehyun in this is a huge stalker!! This isn’t love, he’s obsessed and it’s unhealthy. But I hope you guys enjoy❤️ THANK YOUUU ARI FOR PROOFREADING THIS FOR ME I LOVE YOUUUU❤️❤️❤️❤️😭)
——————
Long ago, there were two beings on Earth, Adam and Eve. They were created by God and tainted by Lucifer, the serpent. The serpent found himself in love with God’s creation, Eve, for she bears a striking resemblance to his first love, Lilith, whom God cursed and sent away. 
God’s most beautiful angel, Lucifer, fell in love with Lilith even though he was forbidden by God to do so. He tried to fight for her in a war against the angels of Heaven, but was struck down to Hell where he could rule the dark. He saw Lilith become a demon. Her beauty had gone away as God made her ugly and it hurt Lucifer to even look at her anymore.
And so, Lucifer turned to Eve and loved her instead, polluting her mind, body, and soul and thus, causing her to be cursed by God as well. She was hidden by God from Lucifer. He grew angry and decided to continue to defy God by living on Earth and causing havoc on both small and large scales.
He went by the name of Jaehyun now, a strikingly handsome bachelor with a mansion on the outskirts of a popular city. He stayed on Earth at the exact point above hell where his throne rested so he could cause evil to run through the city unstopped.
He never forgot about Eve. After all these years, his soul still yearned for her. He cursed at God for hiding her from him and for taking not one, but two of his dearest loves away.
He would walk through the city and see all the couples enjoying each other’s company. They’d laugh and smile and he’d wish nothing but pain for them. If he couldn’t be happy, why should they?
Then one day..he saw her..he saw Eve.
————
You were packing away fruits, placing the oranges in an organized pattern so they wouldn’t fall to the floor of the supermarket. He saw you, delicately picking up the spoiled fruits and placing them into the bin to throw away later. You had a small smile on your face that made you look sweet and your fingers were soft, gentle. You looked at each fruit with adoration in your eyes, like you treasured the round balls of nectar as if they were made of gold.
He walked closer to you, still staring intently.
He wondered how you could exist, how you were here with her face, her body, her hair..you were her. It didn’t take long for him to notice the sparkling ring on your wedding finger. But he didn’t care about that, now that he had you, he would never let you go.
Even if you didn’t sound like Eve or looked at him the way she did when she was in love with him, he had to have you.
“Hello, can I help you, sir?” You turned to the man you noticed had been hanging around you for a bit too long.
Your voice was heavenly, it was the best thing he’d ever heard.
You were looking at him, awaiting his answer when you placed an apple onto the shelf. You didn’t see that placing it in that exact spot would cause for another to fall. But Jaehyun already knew.
He quickly knelt down beside you and caught the green apple as it fell.
You looked down at him and gasped. How could he move so quickly.
He stood up straight, still locking eyes with you. A smile creeps across his face.
“Here.” He hands you the apple as you look down at it still in shock.
“Oh..thank you.” You chuckled and took it from him, then started to walk away after feeling..odd.
He walked towards you. “Umm..excuse me, miss? I’m new here, and I just want to know..where can I find the best coffee?”
He looked down at your name tag.
“Y/n..” he says quietly.
His voice is smooth and nice, just as nice as his perfect face, you thought it ought to have been carved by God himself. His jawline was perfect and his eyes were magnetic, you couldn’t look away.
However, you should’ve. You were married after all.
“Oh..hmm about five blocks south, you’ll find Johnny’s Café, it’s quite nice actually.”
Jaehyun wanted to ask you to join him, just so he could talk to you, just so he could get close to you and have you firmly in his grasp, never to let you disappear again. But he didn’t, he decided to wait, if he scared you away, that would only make it worse for not only him, but for you as well. The last thing he wanted was to hold you against your will just because you resembled her.
“Thank you, y/n, I’ll see you next time.” He walked close to you and nodded slowly. As if hypnotized, you never let his eyes go while you nodded.
He walked by you, leaving you breathless and almost star struck, but who was he? Why did he have this interesting glow about him that made him stand out from everyone else?
Later that day, Jaehyun followed you home. His black Lamborghini wasn’t discreet to say the least, so he had to trail behind a few hundred feet. He could see you jamming out to music in your car as you left work. 
You were adorable and happy, he loved seeing you like this.
He parked far away from your house, he walked over in a long black trench coat and watched as you went inside. You were greeted by a man that looked like...Adam..
His eyes grew into glowing red orbs, he tried hard to hold back his horns and nails.
“This is God’s idea of a joke, isn’t it?” He spoke to himself. Not only were you the exact replica of Eve, your husband was an exact replica of Adam.
You hugged your husband, Kun, hard and smiled widely, happy to see him after a long day at work.
The door clicks shut and Jaehyun stands there with steam escaping his hot ears. He had to figure out how to get rid of Kun.
————
[The Next Day]
You’re lugging around a large box of lettuce through the aisles when you see him..again.
“Hello, y/n, do you need help?” 
You stare at him. “W-what are you doing here?”
He was handsome, you had to admit, your heart couldn’t stop beating like crazy when he showed up. He was stylish in his turtleneck and jean jacket. He smelled refreshing like amber and honey.
“What? A man can’t shop for groceries?” His dimples peeked through as he smiled and tilted his head.
“Oh-no it’s just, two days in a row?”
You furrowed your brows when you sensed something wasn’t right.
Jaehyun could tell that your heart rate was rising because of his presence, you looked around like you were nervous.
“I know, it’s weird, right? But the truth is..I just wanted to see you again..” he said huskily. You felt your chest weaken.
You put the box down and turned to him. “Oh so you’re one of those creeps? Well, I’m flattered but..I’m also married.”
“That’s alright..” he gave a small smile, his dimples showing through again. You turned away. 
“So...what are you looking for today?”
“A friend.”
“A friend?” You chuckled.
He swayed from side to side and looked up to the ceiling. “Okay, I’ll get to the point..there’s a..korean barbecue place that I wanted to try..are you free after work?”
He was so strange but had an aura about him that you couldn’t ignore. His features were sharply defined and his eyes never let you go. You should’ve been creeped out but you weren’t, for he was warm and intriguing. Lately, you felt like Kun was so busy with work. You’d get home and wait hours for him, your friends were busy as well as they were either taking college classes or travel king constantly.
Sometimes, you felt you were alone, so why not start something new.
You hummed before answering. 
Jaehyun watched your cute expression, the way you looked to the floor and stuck your hands in your apron.
“I guess..I am free after work.” You nodded.
Jaehyun nearly jumped up and down right inside the store. He grinned from ear to ear.
“Just don’t pull any moves, I’m married okay?”
You teased and felt your face become warm.
“I promise I won’t.”
The two of you went to dinner at the Korean barbecue place Jaehyun wanted to try. He was enraptured by you, caught up in your presence. He was so in love and you had no idea.
You told him about places to visit in the city and he told you about where he had come from. He made up a city and a backstory to relate to you, telling you that he had investments that started from his grandparents and that’s how he made money.. He’d do anything just to keep speaking with you, even if it meant lying.
He fought hard to hold back his naturally glowing red eyes and goat-like horns. He had to remain normal so you could become his soon enough.
And when you left him and went home, he stayed outside of your house once again, using his elevated hearing skills to listen to you speak with your husband.
Kun was talking to you about some new project he had in a city about two hours away. You stayed silent, disappointed that he would be gone yet again for a business trip. Kun was the senior architect and had to present, he couldn’t skip out on these trips as much as he wanted to.
“Listen, baby I’m sorry but you know how it is.”
Kun stepped into the bathroom as you brushed your teeth. He took his shirt off as he was about to shower.
You spit water out into the sink and look at your reflection, you were trying hard to hold back your anger. Kun stood behind you and watched you through the mirror with a concerned expression on his face.
“If I knew you were going to be gone all the time, I wouldn’t have married you..”
Kun scoffed. “Don’t say that, you know you don’t mean that, y/n.” He wrapped his arms around your waist and smirked through the mirror.
His hand went to your breast and cupped it.
“I mean it, Kun, how is this supposed to work when we have a family? I want us to both be present for our kids.” 
Kun kissed along your neck, he knew you were ticklish. 
You started to giggle. “Kun..stop, you’re distracting me.”
“Ahh baby, did you just say “our kids?” Are you trying to tell me something?” He squeezed your breasts gently
You turned to him and kissed his lips. His other hand reached under your frilly nightgown, bunching it up at the waist, and to his satisfaction you wore nothing else under it. 
“Should we start right now? Should we have a family?” He brushes his clothed erection into your back as he presses his fingers over you already dripping folds. His deep voice always got you like this.
You gasped and looked at him through the mirror. Soon you were gripping the edge of the counter and crying out his name as he fucked you from behind. He grabbed your hair, pulling your head back so you could look at him through the mirror as you came all over his girthy cock.
Jaehyun heard it all, he imagined it was him bringing you to sweet paradise like he did long ago. He listened to your moans and imagined it was his name you called as your eyes rolled in the back of your head.
It pained him to have to pleasure himself as he imagined all that he would do to you. He was Lucifer, after all. He could have anyone in the dark world pleasure him without even asking twice, but he didn’t want just anyone. He wanted you, and soon he would have you right in his grasp.
————-
[1 Month Later]
Jaehyun was a regular customer at the supermarket you worked at, he’d come in at least once a day. You found it odd that he always knew when your breaks were, so he’d bring you coffee or a snack.
If he didn’t visit during his break, he’d wait for you outside so you’d go to a new place for dinner together after you clocked out.
You spoke about everything. He seemed so smart as he knew about every detail in history and taught you about the world and why things were the way they were.
You watched him intently, your eyes grew when he told you something so interesting, your heart started to race. Like the presence of aliens or ghosts and witches. They all existed and Jaehyun told you all of the evidence as you sat there, stunned.
And then, it was his turn to ask questions.
He finally asked about your husband, even though he knew everything about him.
He knew that he had a short temper sometimes but your fights would either lead to make up sex or him sleeping on the couch. He had watched you every night since finding you. He didn’t sleep, for even the thought of closing his eyes and losing sight of you made him sick to his stomach.
“My husband, Kun, is an architect. He works really hard, but he loves me and I love him. He’s really sweet, I never stop thinking about him. We got married about a year ago, and I couldn’t be happier.” You smiled as you looked down at your hot pot as thought of Kun.
“Ahh..that’s nice..he seems like a supportive partner, during your first year of marriage, have you fought a lot?” Jaehyun tilted his head while smirking.
“Nope! We don’t fight at all, we’re pretty chill, you know?”
You were lying to him and he didn’t like that, but he swallowed hard and smiled nonetheless.
“I see..” he nodded.
He realized that he’d have to work harder to get you to stop thinking about Kun. He’d have to sabotage your current relationship if he ever dreamed of being with you soon.
Killing him would be too easy, he’d have to make Kun so bad, that you’d run to him for relief.
———
[A Week Later]
You kissed Kun goodbye and wished him well for his trip. He quickly kissed you back and walked through the front door without a hug.
“Honey?” You called out to him. “Where’s my hug?” You pouted.
He threw his hand up and continued to walk towards his car. “Sorry, baby, gotta go!”
He had been acting strange these past few days, but you knew he was stressed so you brushed it off. You had had sex the night before but he wasn’t as gentle as he usually was, you could tell something had upset him as he choked you for the first time. You didn’t mind it, you were just surprised by how...different he was.
Little did you know that it was Jaehyun that was making his daily work more difficult. Kun’s important documents and files would go missing right before a presentation, his coworkers weren’t showing up for work, and his boss was always upset with him for some reason. He was starting to dislike his job and he wasn’t sure why, for this was his passion, but lately, everything seemed to be going poorly.
Kun was having difficulty sleeping as well. He’d have disturbing dreams of a place with fire and monsters with sharp teeth. He’d sweat and pant, and eventually be jolted awake in his bed, every night at 3:23 A.M. he’d go downstairs and watch something on TV or write down a few project ideas.
The lack of sleep definitely contributed to his poor mood, but he didn’t tell you for some reason.
Jaehyun watched Kun speed off. He smiled to himself, knowing that his plan was working, he was getting frustrated at work and began taking his anger out on you. 
————
[Four Days Later]
You continued to spend time with Jaehyun. You lost track of time as you watched him speak. His dimples were adorable, his voice was intoxicating and you loved staring into his deep brown eyes.
He watches you play with your wedding ring as you nod and smile at him. His smile was like a blooming garden, his laugh was like heavenly trumpets. The two of you were flirting now, and he could tell from your heartbeat that you weren’t really listening to him, instead, you were fantasizing about him. The glances turned into stares.
You watched his lips and licked your own, your face was hot, but you furrowed your brows and looked down at your ring.
What were you doing? Were you getting emotionally attached to him? You couldn’t do this, you couldn’t hurt Kun.
You got up from your seat. “Well, it’s late.. I should go.”
“Noo.. don’t leave yet.” Jaehyun stood up and touched your hand. The disappointed look in his eyes ate away at your heart. You were developing a nice friendship, but a part of you was afraid that it was becoming something more, something that couldn’t be.
“You look stressed. Do you want a drink?..we can visit that new bar in town.” Jaehyun bites his bottom lip.
A drink did sound nice, it had been a while since you and Kun went out to a bar together and sometimes you did miss the atmosphere, you were young after all, everyone else in their early twenties went out.
Jaehyun smiled to himself as he saw you contemplate your options. He knew you were worried about Kun, but he also knew you needed to have some fun.
So you agreed.
The two of you went out to a bar and drank. You laughed and joked around all night. Jaehyun pretended to be affected by the alcohol, just so he could make you laugh and see your beautiful smile.
He dropped you off home at about 1 A.M after you sobered up a bit.
You turned to him and licked your lips. “You know, Jaehyun, if I weren’t married to Kun..I would date you for sure.” You giggled and leaned in close. And all Jaehyun could think was “yes.” He wanted to feel your plump lips so badly, he wanted to caress them and make love to you to relive the best days of his life, but now was not the time.
He backed away and held your hand while searching your eyes. “Y/n...you should go inside now..”
You sighed, nodding as you opened the door to quickly leave before you could embarrass yourself any more.
You go into your house and to your surprise, Kun is there, his face red and stern as he sat on the loveseat in the living room. The room was dark, lit only by a small night light in the corner and the moonlight from outside. 
Kun was nearly fired by his boss during his trip. He was upset and frustrated, but what made matters worse was when he went home at 10 PM to see that you weren’t there. Then time went on and you still didn’t come home.
You smirked and put your bag down.
“Babyyyyy.. I missed you.” You start to crawl over his lap slowly.
He can tell from the drawn out tones in your voice that you’re drunk. He winces and turns away.
“Where were you, y/n?”
“Out with a friend..we had some drinks and talked.” You straddle him, placing his crotch in between your legs as you kneel over him. You then lean down and kiss his collarbone.
“Why are you home so late? Is it because you didn’t think I’d be home early?” Kun growled out. He wasn’t amused in the slightest by the way you were acting.
“No, baby, I just wanted to hang out with someone for a little bit, you know? I’m so lonely when you’re not here.”
You try to kiss his lips but he flicks his head to the side.
“Who’s this “friend?”
You gulp and straighten your body. You pout as you look down at him. “Baby, kiss me..don’t you miss me too?” You take the straps of your dress down before unhooking your bra and throwing it to the floor.
Jaehyun watched through an open window behind the loveseat as you kneel over an angry Kun. His eyes glow red and his horns grow out of his head as does the straining member in his pants. You in your drunken haze never noticed the pair of crimson eyes outside.
Kun doesn’t touch you or look at your breasts with nipples begging to be sucked. He wanted to take them into his mouth badly, but he was more focused on another issue at hand.
He wrapped his hand around your throat. “Tell me..their name.”
You smirked. “His name is Jaehyun..but we’re just friends, baby, I promise.”
Kun thrusts himself into you from below, grinding hard against your covered opening. You whimper and move your hips to rub your slit against him.
“Well..stop being friends with him, no guy just wants to be friends with a girl..he wants to fuck you..”
You grind down onto him harder, he squeezes his hand and grips your thigh.
“He doesn’t, he’s really nice and helps me at work sometimes.”
Kun digs his nail into your thigh causing you to cry out in pain. He digs into it so deep, he sees blood from your leg run onto his thumb.
But you reach under your dress and pull his boxers down. You still wanted him in your aching core badly, the pain only added to your yearning.
“Y/n.” He says sternly as he watches you align yourself with his hard cock. You sink down onto him slowly and let out a loud moan as it passes through the sensitive skin and rests deep in your core. You adjust to him quickly as you had already been built up by dry humping him before.
He squeezes your throat again.
“Y/n..” 
You move up and down. “Yes..” you call out before licking your lips.
He grabs your waist with both hands and lifts you off of him.
“Kun!” You cry his name after being left empty.
“You’re not gonna get out of this so easily. If you want my cock, tell me you’re done with him.”
“But, baby..”
Kun shakes his head. “Don’t. I’m your husband and you should really take into consideration how I might feel when you spend time with men, when you fucking drink alcohol with men like..like some kinda slut.”
You gasped. “Slut?” 
Kun nods. “Look at you, you’re just thirsty for any male attention. I work my ass off for a few days and you’re already looking for a replacement.”
“Kun, that’s not true.” You felt your chest rumble, as if you were about to burst into tears.
He flips you over onto the couch. “I’m your husband, aren’t I?”
You nod.
“Then do as I say, don’t go out with Jaehyun again.”
Before you can protest his thrusts into you hard and begins to choke you again.
He goes hard and fast as you mewl. 
“Baby, slower, please.”
He bites your nipple and looks down at you to see your body tremble with each rough thrust he gives you, your lips parting to let out the most heavenly moans, your round breasts moving up and down, your legs bent and spread across the loveseat.
“You’re all mine, right?”
“Yes..fuck, yes.” His thumb on your clit makes you dizzy.
“Then I’m gonna breed you, would you like that? Gonna fuck you so hard and get you pregnant.” Kun grunts into your ear.
Jaehyun grimaces outside of your window. Kun, or Adam rather, hadn’t changed at all. He still believed in a woman’s subordination to her husband. He believed from the beginning of time that a woman should lay under her husband, not above.
And now, he was trying to make you his by breeding you, making it impossible for you to break the link between the two of you. But Jaehyun had to make sure that didn’t happen, he had to stop him before he could do this to you.
————
[Three Days Later]
It’s been three days since that night and you hadn’t shown up to work. Kun made love to you day and night on your time off, he felt threatened by the presence of another male in your life and felt it necessary to remind you why you married him in the first place.
He cooked breakfast for you and bought you nice things. You even went to the movies and ice skating. You enjoyed the time off and Kun’s company, it finally felt like things were getting back to normal. You were happy.
Jaehyun, on the other hand, was furious. He knew where you were, but he couldn’t believe that you had forgotten about him so easily. He didn’t want to get violent, but maybe he would have to.
A few days later, you finally return to work and as usual, Jaehyun was there to bring you a cookie.
“Hey! Where have you been?” He asked as you put bread up on the shelves.
“Oh..I took some time off, Kun came home early so we had a little vacation..thank you for the other night though, I really had a great time.” You finally looked up at him and noticed the slightly crazed look in his eyes. His lips were tightly shut.
“That’s great. Would you like to go out again tonight?” He asks sweetly.
You sigh and shake your head. “Umm...Jaehyun..I can’t..do this..”
His smile starts to fade.
“I-I can’t pretend that we are just friends when I’ve had thoughts about you that I shouldn’t have. I’m married and it’s..really not right for me to get emotionally involved with someone.”
Jaehyun chuckles. “That’s nonsense! We are just friends.”
“But we’re not. Look..it’s best if we end this now, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t come to my work place anymore.”
Jaehyun screams internally. You were really doing as Kun said by cutting him off. Was he that disposable?
A smile still rests on his face. 
“As you wish..” he nods and leaves after handing you the cookie he brought.
You swallow hard and sigh. That was harder than you thought it would be, but it felt right. It felt like you could finally focus on your marriage with Kun.
Your day at work ended as it usually did. You closed up and walked to your car, but as you got closer you noticed a figure standing beside it.
It had two red eyes and horns peeking out of its skull.
You slowed down. “Hello?” You called out into the empty parking lot.
The figure stepped out of the shadows and under a street light, that’s when you squinted to make out its familiar features. The red eyes and horns had disappeared.
“Jaehyun?”
He stood there creepily in a long black coat and black pants. His face was unreadable and he stayed silent.
You walked closer. “Jaehyun, what are you doing here?”
“You know..” Jaehyun scratches his head and laughs.
“I think we should grab something to eat.”
“Jaehyun..” you looked to the side and away from his somber face. You were just a few feet away from each other now.
“We’ll just be eating, we don’t even have to talk.” Jaehyun stepped forward and pleaded.
He didn’t want to lose you, he couldn’t lose you, not after all this time when he had finally gotten so close.
“I can’t, Kun is waiting for me.” You looked up at him with wide eyes.
Jaehyun felt his body tremble whenever you looked at him like that.
He suddenly leaned forward and kissed your lips hard. You fell into him for a brief moment, but then realized what was happening. You quickly bit his lip and pulled away.
“Jaehyun!” You rubbed your lip. “What the hell?!”
He licked the blood on his lips and frowned after your warmth disappeared.
“I’m sorry, I just-“ he reached out for you again but you backed away and opened your car in a rush.
“Leave me alone! I never want to see you again!”
Jaehyun only watched as you scurried into your car seat and locked the car doors.
He banged on the window hard, you jumped from the sound for you were terrified by him. You saw a dark flint in his eyes that you’d never seen.
Tears ran down your cheeks as you put the car in drive.
You sped out of the parking lot and away from him.
“I’ll never let you go, y/n, now that I have you..I’ll never let you go.” He whispered to himself.
————-
[1 Month Later]
The honeymoon feeling you felt with Kun soon dissipated as things went back to how they’d usually been. He spent his time at work and would come home upset, some nights he didn’t even speak to you. He looked sleep deprived and when you asked him about it, he’d have a fit and say he’s fine.
Some nights he wouldn’t look at you, you couldn’t remember the last time you had made love.
He was always short with you, but lately, you found it increasingly difficult to deal with his negative mood. Is this really who you wanted to be married to?
Jaehyun had been messing with him, he’d purposely make every day difficult for him. Kun couldn’t sleep most nights, but when he did, Jaehyun made sure to fill his mind with dark scenes to scare him. Sometimes he’d throw in false images of you making love to a faceless man. It gave Kun the feeling that he was walking in on you cheating on him. He would wake up from these nightmares but they felt so real, he couldn’t ignore how upset they made him.
Kun was paranoid, he felt like someone was out to get him and he didn’t know who it could be, but he didn’t trust even you as much as he did three months ago.
Then one night, you came home late because of a terrible thunderstorm and traffic. You were only about an hour late, but Kun was already home and steaming on the couch.
“Where were you?” He asked as soon as you entered the house.
You exhaled loudly. “Oh, so now you speak to me.”
“Yeah, I’m speaking to you, I’m asking a fucking question.”
You raised your brows. “And who are you to talk to me like that?”
“I’m your husband, or did you forget that when you fucked him tonight?” Kun bit back as he sat up in the chair.
Your face wrinkled as you placed your bag down.
“What are you talking about?”
“Jaehyun..do you think I’m some kind of idiot? I know you’re still seeing him.”
You scoffed. “Wowww Kun.”
You walk away to the kitchen to get some water.
“No, don’t “wowww” me, tell me I’m lying!” His voice started to raise, he walked into the kitchen after you.
“Kun..you sound ridiculous right now, I’m late because there’s a thunderstorm, or do you not hear it just like you don’t hear your phone ringing when I call you?” You asked sarcastically.
“If you’re gonna be late, you should tell me.”
You gulped down your water. “I don’t have to report anything to you! You’re not my king or whatever you think you are.”
“I’m your husband! And you should treat me like a king because look at this house, you wouldn’t be in it if it weren’t for me.”
Your eyes widened. “Are you really holding the house over my head? Wow Kun, you’ve really hit rock bottom, haven’t you?”
Kun chuckles. “Maybe Jaehyun lives somewhere nice, why don’t you go to him since I’m not your king.”
“Okay, here we go again, why are you so insecure, Kun?!” 
The two of you went back and forth that night. You broke down in tears as Kun said hurtful things that left you stunned. 
“I want a divorce!” You yelled and stormed out.
You jumped into your car and drove away, you didn’t know where you were going to go, but you knew you needed to be away from him.
You dialed up Jaehyun who had heard the entire conversation from outside of your house.
“Hello?” He said with the faked tone of confusion in his voice.
“Jaehyun..I need to see you.”
You drove to his house.
It was an incredibly large mansion, and when you went inside, the walls were lined with gold and red velvet curtains. It looked beautiful, unreal almost.
You wondered how Jaehyun could live in an expensive place at such a young age.
Jaehyun looked at your magnificent face as your mouth dropped open.
“Investments.” He smirked.
You laughed and looked back at him. His eyes were warm, his smile was bright.
He could tell you had been crying so once in the foyer he steps close to you and searches your wet eyes.
He runs his thumb along your cheek as you gaze up at him.
“What happened, love?”
You shook your head. “It’s Kun..we fought, I just..I don’t know, Jaehyun, I don’t think we can make it.”
“I’m sorry to hear that, y/n..”
“I love him, I really do but..” you look to the side and sniffle.
“Is he controlling, y/n?”
Your eyes flicker up to him. You nod slowly.
“Is he the reason why you stopped hanging out with me?”
You nod again.
Jaehyun purses his lips. “Y/n..he’s threatened by you, he doesn’t want you to be independent now that you’re married. He wants to control you and that isn’t a partnership. That isn’t love.”
Your eyes brim with tears once again. “Jaehyun..I don’t want to think about him right now...I want to feel loved, can you do that for me?”
Jaehyun’s dark soul nearly escapes his body. “Of course.” 
You place both hands on his head and kiss him slowly and sensually. You both close your eyes as you fall into him more, his arms wrapping around you to bring you closer to him. He wants to become one with you, feel you, smell you, to be completely enraptured by you for eternity.
Time stood still and your heart fluttered as it was finally being satisfied by something it had craved from the first moment you met Jaehyun.
He too felt everything slow down to a crawl, your lips tasted like the sweetest fruit, your hands were soft like plush blankets.
He pulls away to breathe, his hot breath hitting your now swollen lips. “So beautiful” he whispers into them, then kisses you again in the dim lighting of his house.
He takes you into his arms and carries you to one of his many bedrooms.
“I will take you higher than the heavens themself, just give in to me.” He whispers softly.
He lays you down gently onto the fluffy bed and watches as you relax into it, your hair looking gorgeous as it lays against the white sheets, your neck just begging for soft kisses or hastily made bite marks, cute nose and round, swollen lips. He looks into your wide eyes and smiles. “You’re stunning.” He kicks his shoes off and crawls over you.
You giggled and held him by the hem on his shirt. “Jaehyun...kiss me.”
He leaned down and kissed you as you asked. He was transported back to when your name was Eve and the two of you made love in the garden. Your lips taste the same as hers, your skin feels the same, your touch and everything else was the same. Jaehyun was more than pleased to finally be experiencing your love again.
You start to take your pants down your legs and eventually kick them off. Jaehyun takes his clothes off as well, then watches you take your hoodie off to reveal your breasts.
Without hesitation, he lays his tongue flat against the perky nub, coating it with his spit. He then swirls his tongue around it while he massages the other breast that he hasn’t tasted yet. 
You moan and run your fingers through his hair.
His fingers press onto your thigh, then work their way to your sensitive skin between your legs. You tremble as they brush lightly against it.
You arch your back, telling him silently that you want him to go further. He sucks your nipples harder and listens to another moan leave your beautiful lips.
He takes two fingers and uses them to part your folds. He circles his fingertips around your entrance to collect the liquid that has formed from you being so turned on already.
He kisses the skin in between your breasts.
“You taste so sweet.”
He pushes his fingers into you slowly, your legs widen a bit to adjust to him. His fingers are long and slender, but it doesn’t take much time before his knuckles hit your most sensitive part.
“Jaehyun..” you exhale.
His fingers glide in and out of you slowly, he curls his finger tips to press right onto the fleshy spot that makes your head spin. He flicks his tongue across your breast as his fingers work on your needy area.
He looks up at you through low eyes, your dainty fingers grasping onto the sheets tightly.
“So-so close.” You whimper.
His fingers move faster, pressing onto your clenching walls as you get closer.
He then kneels and looks down at you as his fingers still move back and forth.
He licks his lips and lowers his face to the apex of your open legs. He flicks his tongue across you slit now, combining the action of his tongue with his finger to drive you crazy.
He moves his tongue in circular motions onto your clit as his finger moves in faster and presses onto your g-spot harder.
His long tongue flattens onto you repeatedly. 
You cry out his name one final time before cumming onto his fingers. He continues to rub his nose onto your clit and lick inside you as you climax and shake.
You try to push your body up away from him, but he holds your waist down firmly and continues to eat you out.
“Jaehyun!” You look down at him to see his eyes, almost with a glint of red in them, looking up at you sternly.
He places a kiss onto your folds then crawls over you to face you. He licks his lips. 
“Y/n, my love, I will never force you to bow down to me, you are my queen, you always have been. I will not lose you like I did so long ago.”
You’re slightly confused, but you nod and kiss him. He lays down beside you and takes your waist into his hands as his tongue now dances with yours.
He brings your body over on top of his.
Your skin becomes littered with goose pimples as he runs his hands up and down your thighs.
You kneel over his intimidating length and take in a sharp breath while running your hands along his chest and abs. He, too, was magnificent, like a painting or sculpture come to life.
He takes your hand in his and watches your naked body above him. 
He remembered the first time you made love, you rode him that time too, bringing him to his most memorable orgasm of all time.
You sink down onto him slowly, your head falling back instantly.
You couldn’t stop your pussy from clenching around him as he stretched you out so well and stimulated you just from being halfway in.
He pushes up into you to help you. You feel his cock buried deep inside you, running against your silky walls and pressing onto your sweet spot once more.
He curved into you so perfectly. You bite your lips and swivel your hips as you move up and down. He grabs your ass and brings it down onto him. 
He groans when you quiver around him and it is a low sound that you’ve never heard before, it’s almost animalistic.
But it’s hot, and pushes you closer to the edge.
Jaehyun watched your body shimmer in the low, warm lighting of the room. Your face is adorable, your skin is soft and glistens, you smell like vanilla. He wished he could have you like this forever, gliding down onto him, your breasts moving up and down as you whimper and moan from the feeling of his cock stretching you out.
You are his Heaven.
He thrusts up into you harder. The sound of skin slapping against skin fills the room as does your groans and cries.
Jaehyun fits you so perfectly, you’re on the brink of tears, you're weak and ride him sloppily as you chase your high.
Jaehyun knows this and flips you over onto your back in a swift move. He places your legs onto his shoulders and pushes into you. His hips slap against yours as he kisses you again.
He uses his ability to grow even more while inside you.
His eyes glow red but your eyes are closed as he fucks into you from above now.
“Jaehyun..fuck..” Tears escape your eyes. Your pussy clenches uncontrollably around his cock.
He runs his palm onto your belly and feels his cock twitch in the pit of your stomach. “I’m so deep inside you, do you like feeling me? Do you want me to release deep inside you?”
He moves faster.
You arch your back. “Fill me up, please, I want you inside me so badly.” You whimper out.
Jaehyun licks his thumb and places it onto your clit. He licks your breast again and sucks hard.
You cum hard and shake.
He climaxes as well, cumming deep inside you as you let out a stream of curses. You had never orgasmed so hard, but something about Jaehyun has you trembling for several minutes. He was able to deliver pleasure just as he was able to deliver pain in the underworld.
He rubs his thumb along the side of your sweaty face while watching his cum leak out of you.
“My love..would you like me to fuck you again?”
His voice is gravelly, but confident, for he already knows the answer.
You nod and within a few milliseconds you’re on your chest with your ass up in the air. Jaehyun pounds you into the bed and has you calling out his name several times that night.
You fall asleep after climaxing many times. You felt amazing, like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. Jaehyun held you in his arms and cuddled you to sleep.
“Y/n..I’m happy you’re mine now.”
————
[The Next Day]
Jaehyun woke up to see that you left him, you had snuck out and drove back home.
You left a note for him explaining that you couldn’t be in a relationship with him for your heart belonged to Kun. 
“Thank you for being here for me, I am sorry for coming to you during my weakest moment. I hope you will respect my wish to not see you again, as I must remain steady in my marriage to Kun.
With Love, Y/n” 
Jaehyun crumbles up the note and sets fire to it in his hands. His horns grow large and his eyes beam red, furious is an understatement.
How could you do this to him? He made love to you, gave you the best love you’d ever had and you still went back to him.
He would make sure to ruin Kun, for if he couldn’t have you, no one else should.
————
[3 Months Later] 
Jaehyun was still hurt by you leaving him that night, but he knew there was nothing he could do. A part of him wanted you to be happy, but a part of him wanted to destroy Kun so he could have you all to himself.
He had planned to get rid of him until he discovered that you were pregnant. He wasn’t sure if the baby was his or Kun’s, but he did know that if he were to kill Kun you would potentially lose the baby from devastation. He couldn’t do that to you, he couldn’t cause that pain even if he was satisfied by Kun’s death.
So he watches you from afar, imagining once again that it was him preparing for a baby instead of Kun.
The two of you looked happy, maybe it was the child that was making things different.
Either way, he hated seeing you so happy without him.
————
[8 Months Later]
You give birth to your son. You and Kun raise it together and take turns watching it during the night. 
One day, Jaehyun visits you while you cradle the baby at home alone.
You open the door and your smile falls.
Jaehyun, however, smiles harder when he sees your pretty face, glowing from the post pregnancy hormone changes.
Seeing you like this makes him want to get you pregnant all over again.
“J-Jaehyun?” You hadn’t seen him since that night, but he still looked good.
“Y/n..it’s been so long, hasn’t it?”
Something about him being there after so much time made you uneasy.
“Well..can I come in?” Jaehyun gives a half smile.
You nod and let him in.
You hold your baby and sit in a rocking chair. “So..what brings you here?”
“I’m here to see my child of course!”
Your brows furrow. “YOUR..child?”
Jaehyun smirks and steps closer to you. He smiles to himself as he looks at the baby.
“Come on, y/n, did you forget how many times I buried my seed into your beautiful cunt that night?”
You shook your head. “Don’t speak like that, please. I was weak, I-I was sad and broken..”
“Of course, but you loved it, you loved all of it.” He looked up to the ceiling and shut his eyes.
“I can still hear your moans right now.”
“Kun is the father, Jaehyun..this isn’t up for debate.”
“And if he’s not?” He tilts his head and looks back down at you.
“Well, he is. I’ll raise this child with my husband, regardless of who the biological father is, we have no place for you in this house.”
“Tsk tsk...keeping me away from my own child? Y/n..that’s not very nice of you, my love.”
“Don’t call me that!” Your voice rose slightly. “We had one night together, I don’t want to be with you, I will never be yours.”
“You’re already mine, y/n, you always will be, don’t you understand, after all these years?”
You shook your head. “Jaehyun.. you’re crazy. I’d like you to leave.”
You reached your hand out to grab your phone.
Jaehyun sees that you're nervous and chuckles to himself. “Oh..y/n..you’ve really made me upset. I guess I will just have to embrace my nature.”
He shuts the front door as you stare intently.
You always had a fear that the baby might be his, but how did he know you were pregnant in the first place?
————
[Two Days Later]
Jaehyun summons Lilith.
“And to what do I owe the pleasure?”
She appears to him with a slim body and dark hair this time. Her face is perfect like one of some celebrity, but God cursed Jaehyun’s vision so that when he looks at Lilith, he can only see an ugly monster. 
“I need you to take it.”
Jaehyun demands as sits on his throne in Hell. He tosses an apple in the air.
“Seduce the man and come back with the baby.”
“And what do I get out of it?” She places her hand on her hip.
“Nothing. But if you don’t do it, I will rip your fucking head off.” He looks up at her slowly. “Is that a good enough reason for you?”
Lilith scoffs then goes to do as she is told.
She appears to Kun who is half asleep on the couch in the living room. It’s his turn to watch the baby, so he can’t sleep completely.
“Hey there, big boy.” She says smoothly and crawls over him.
“Who—who are you?”
“My name’s Lilith.” She zips her leather jacket down to reveal her bare chest. “You look lonely, sweetheart.”
Kun is hypnotized by her, he doesn’t know if he’s awake or asleep, but he does know that he wants her badly. 
“Do you want to fuck me?” Lilith asks with doe eyes as she looks up at him and pumps her breasts.
Kun nods and soon finds himself enraptured by a succubus, burying himself into her and thus falling into her trap as you, his wife, lay sound asleep in the room above.
Once Lilith brings Kun to an extraordinary climax, he falls asleep.
She then walks upstairs slowly to the baby room.
Her appealing looks disappear and she transforms into her true being, a disturbingly ugly monster with grey skin and long legs and arms. Her bones crack as she grows to about 6 feet 6 inches tall, her black hair falls out onto the floor and her jaw protrudes as her eyes glow red. She smells like rotten eggs as green liquid oozes out of her pores and eyes.
She stares at the baby sleeping soundly in its crib.
You, however, wake up from the crackling sound.
“Kun?” You murmur.
You get up and walk to the baby room.
You nearly pass out from the stench and feel your legs grow weak when you see the ghastly being standing over your baby.
“Hey!” You call out, but when the thing turns around, it already has your baby in its arms. A wide creepy smile filled with about twenty sharp and misshapen teeth creeps across its face.
You start to cry. “Put him down!”
You run towards it but it disappears.
You grasp the crib and look into it, shifting the blankets around before looking under it.
Your baby was nowhere to be found.
You let out a painful scream that Jaehyun, and even your neighbors could hear and fell to the floor.
Kun finally woke up and ran upstairs. He consoled you as you cried uncontrollably.
———-
[One Month Later]
The police and everyone in the neighborhood helped you to search for your baby, but nothing happened. 
You tried to explain that night so many times, but nothing made sense and people just thought you were crazy.
Even Kun. He left you soon after the incident, the heartbreak was too much for him and he didn’t trust you. So he left you, moving further away and starting a new life without you as the divorce papers started to process.
You were alone, you couldn’t deal with the loss of your child. You sat alone at a pond and cried until you couldn’t cry anymore.
Jaehyun knew your time was running out, he knew you’d pass and eventually come to him to live with him in the dark world.
Your heart breaks and you die of sadness at the edge of the pond.
Your soul slips away from your body. 
Jaehyun is there watching as you stare down at it in confusion.
“Jaehyun?”
“Hello, y/n.”
“Where am I?”
“You’re with me now, where you should be.” He smiles as he goes to take your hand, but his hand passes through.
Jaehyun looks in confusion at his hand.
“Can you see me?” You ask.
“Of course I can. I should be able to touch you too, but..” he turns away and looks at his hand which is still vibrating like it had just been shocked with electricity.
“What’s happening?”
He turns back to you, but you’re gone.
“Oh, Lucifer..” a male voice calls out to him.
“You thought you had it all figured out, didn’t you? You would have her die then bring her to hell to live with you forever..”
“Winwin?” He recognizes the angel in front of him.
“I wish I could say it’s nice to see you again, but it really isn’t.”
“What the hell is going on? She’s mine!” He grows angry, his eyes becoming red and his horns growing out in harmony with his black wings.
“No, she isn’t. She belongs with us, remember God will always win.” Winwin smirks.
“No..no they can’t do this to me again!”
“Of course they can! Goodbye, LuLu!” Winwin then spins and disappears.
Jaehyun curses and shouts loudly, so loudly that the heavens can hear him. You can hear him, but now you realized who he really was and why he was so infatuated with you. It broke your heart that he went to such lengths to hold onto you, but now you knew that he was nothing but evil.
Jaehyun could feel you, he could sense you everywhere and sometimes he could see you, but he could never touch you again. He would have to live eternally as a tortured individual that lost his love 3 times.
“Well, at least you have the child.” Lilith looks at her nails as Jaehyun thrashes about in hell.
“What will you name him?”
Jaehyun smooths his hair back and walks to the crib that the baby sleeps in. “His name..is Cain.”
2K notes · View notes
erin-bo-berin · 4 years
Text
Growing Family
MASTERLIST
Woo I’m finally back to writing some! It feels like it’s been a lot longer than it actually has since I’ve posted a new fic. I hate to disappoint, but this is just fluffy daddy Spencer today, but I am working on a few new smuts that should be coming up next so stay tuned for those! Also shout out to @velventeenaries for coming up with some of the lines Rossi said when we were having a convo on this situation. Thus, the inspiration for this fic was born. Happy reading!
Spencer Reid/Reader
Rating: G (fluff)
Word Count: 2,557
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“Penny G at your service, how may I help you?”
You smiled at the familiar female voice that came through the speakers of your car.
“Hey Penelope,” you said.
“Y/N! My favorite non-BAU chica! What can I do for you, today?”
You chuckled knowing good and well the chipper, eccentric and kind hearted blonde was most likely swinging in her chair, twirling a feathery pen in her hands as you spoke.
“I was just curious if the rest of the team was back yet? If so, I wanted to swing by before heading home. I just got out of my doctor’s appointment.”
“Please tell me you have ultrasound pics!” Penelope’s voice grew in excitement.
“That I do,” you grinned.
“Okay, good. Yes, they’re here and you better be here in 5 minutes or less or I will hunt you down for those pictures. PG out.”
You shook your head, exasperated by the usual antics of Penelope Garcia. She was basically the fairy godmother tech analyst of the Behavioral Analysis Unit—the department of the FBI where your husband Spencer worked.
Just recently in the last few months, you and Spencer had found out you were pregnant. Being that it was yours and his first baby, the excitement was unreal but it wasn’t just limited to the two of you. The rest of the BAU were just as excited too.
Garcia was maybe on another level of excitement though. She was already planning on things to buy for the newest BAU baby. It had been almost four years since a new little bundle of joy had arrived within the extended BAU family. Rose Mary Simmons, the fifth and final child of team member Matt Simmons and his wife Kristy, was no longer a baby. She was speeding towards four and would be starting kindergarten in only a year and a half.
“You know I love all my godsons and goddaughters,” Penelope had told you, not long after you and Spencer had announced your happy event, “But I need more baby love in my life and thank God you’re having a baby. I will happily babysit any time you want.”
“Oh, Garcia,” you snickered to yourself, thinking back on the memory as you maneuvered your car through the busy D.C. traffic.
As you’d told Garcia, you’d just gone to your latest doctor’s appointment. You were about 15 weeks along and already showing more than you expected to, which peaked your curiosity. If you were to guess, you could easily pass for 5 almost 6 months pregnant, not barely 4.
You had planned to ask the doctor at today’s appointment if she was sure it wasn’t twins. You had a strong feeling it was. Being only 15 weeks though, you’d only had one prior ultrasound around 7 weeks—not long after you’d discovered your pregnancy and even then, the ultrasound had revealed only one heartbeat. Typically, an expectant mother didn’t have another ultrasound until around 20 weeks, obviously to determine the sex, but your doctor thought it best to check. If anything, it was possible that you were just carrying further forward than usual. According to Spencer—and the many times he’d told you this—it was extremely possible it was just the way your body carried pregnancy. You knew well enough that bump sizes varied greatly.
You’d hoped Spencer could join you for today’s appointment—one that had been scheduled last month—but unfortunately, he’d been away on a case with the team and was on the way home.
You told him you could easily reschedule, but he heard nothing of it.
“You’re going today. Just to make sure little one is okay. You can show me the pictures when we’re back,” he’d said to you, earlier that morning, over the phone.
You’d reluctantly agreed.
But now, you couldn’t help but smile at the little secret you had.
“There she is!” Garcia squealed, running towards you practically the moment you stepped foot out of the elevator.
“Hey, Penelope,” you smiled, embracing your friend.
“How are we feeling?” she grinned, pulling away to rub your bump, “Is it twins like you thought?”
You chuckled, knowing Garcia wasted no time in getting to the point.
“Well, about that…” you took her arm, walking with her into the doors of the BAU.
-
You’d filled Garcia in on the way towards the briefing room where most of the team had settled for the time being, just trying to relax after the trip home. If her huge smile was any indicator, Spencer would know before you could even get the words out.
“Whoa! If it isn’t baby mama Reid,” Luke grinned, coming to give you a brotherly side hug, “Wow, you’re enormous.”
Garcia’s eyes widened, swinging an arm out to hit Luke’s chest—hard.
“Ow! Uh enormously beautiful I mean. You’re glowing,” he tried to cover.
“Nice save,” you laughed, heading over to your husband, who was anxiously awaiting to wrap his arms around you.
“You idiot,” you heard Penelope mumble to Luke, “You never tell a pregnant woman how big they are.”
You bit back a laugh and melted into Spencer’s embrace. He’d been gone for almost a week and you’d missed him, a lot.
“Hi, baby,” he grinned, picking you up as he hugged you.
You bent your legs slightly as you were lifted a few inches off the ground and hugged his neck, tightly.
“Soon you won’t be able to do this,” you laughed, then waved to the rest of the team in the room, “Hi guys.”
You patted Spencer’s shoulder lightly.
“Spence, set me down long enough so I can say hi to everyone and not be rude,” you laughed.
He obliged with a grin, giving a quick pat to your bump and you went to hug Tara, JJ and Matt.
“What’d you find out?” JJ asked, “Spence mentioned you had a doctor’s appointment today.”
“Well…” you trailed off, nervously.
“Is the baby okay?!” Spencer asked, his face morphing into panicked concern, his brows furrowed.
“Everything’s fine,” you reassured quickly, “But it’s not just a baby,” you said hesitantly.
His eyebrows rose, looking shocked.
“It’s twins?”
“Not exactly,” you laughed hesitantly, “We’re having triplets.”
Spencer looked as shocked as you felt when the technician had told you the same news. To know you weren’t growing one baby but three.
He stood for a second, blinking at you in surprise. You were about to say something when you suddenly realized how pale he was. He swayed on his feet before falling backwards.
“Spence!”
“Spencer!”
“Reid!”
Everyone shouted at once, your shriek of his name probably the loudest. They all moved into action at once as you stood horrified, afraid something was terribly wrong.
Luckily, Matt had been quick enough to catch Spencer before he hit the ground. With he and Luke on either side, they managed to sit him in one of the chairs, his head lolling back.
“Is he okay? What’s wrong?” you asked, quickly at his side, not knowing exactly what to do.
“He’s fine, he just passed out, that’s all,” Tara reassured you.
You nodded in relief, taking a seat in a chair next to him, taking his hand. 
There was a commotion at the door and you looked over, seeing David Rossi running in—unit chief Emily Prentiss on his heels.
“What’s all the noise about?” Rossi asked, eyeing Spencer, “What happened?”
“Spencer fainted and Y/N’s having triplets!” Garcia exclaimed.
Rossi’s eyes flickered to Spencer once again.
“Nah, kid’s just sleeping. Making up for the next 18 years of it he’s gonna lose.”
“Dave,” Emily sighed, exasperated, coming over to bend down and hug you.
“Congrats,” she grinned, “Not only are you having triplets, but you’re the only person that’s made Spencer faint.”
You laughed a bit.
“Definitely wasn’t my intention.”
“He’ll be fine,” Rossi waved a hand.
Just as he said that, a groaning came from your right and you looked over, to see Spencer stirring.
“What did I tell you?” Rossi said, coming over to give his congratulations with a big smile.
“Bouna fortuna,” he grinned, giving you a kiss on each cheek.
“What happened?” Spencer groaned, his hand slipping from your grip to rub at his eyes.
“You just got the shock of your life, kid,” Rossi snickered.
“The last thing I remember is you saying triplets and everything went black,” Spencer said.
“Yeah, you fainted,” you tried to hold back your grin and failed.
“Are we really having triplets?” Spencer asked, eyes wide once again.
“I’m afraid we are,” you grinned.
His look of surprise quickly turned into one of excitement. He grabbed your face, kissing you hard, not caring about kissing you in front of the others. The rest of the team whistled, clapped and laughed, their joy just as huge as your own.
Rossi’s following remark made Spencer pull away from your lips and laugh. Your mouth curved upwards and joined him.
“Don’t forget! David is a great name for a boy!”
Everyone was gathered at your baby shower. You had been speechless when you first saw the amount of stacked diapers and wipes—along with at least 5 diaper cakes from different team members. You were sure that those would last maybe a week or two with three babies to change.
“Kid, come on! We’re a family! I’ll be grandpa Dave! We can get matching shirts that say Big Dave and Little Dave!”
You laughed, overhearing Rossi’s exclamations to Spencer, all the way from the food table.
Months had passed and your belly had grown exponentially. You could hardly believe that your body was capable of carrying three precious little babies.
Even though your belly was covered in stretch marks, your back hurt and your feet were swollen, you couldn’t be happier. You and Spencer would soon start a new chapter in your lives—a scary one, albeit exciting one too.
Only a few weeks after your reveal of the babies to Spencer and the BAU team, the two of you had discovered you were welcoming two girls and one boy. Ever since then, Rossi had been hounding you about naming the baby after him.
Unbeknownst to him, you and Spencer had already picked out names and were going to surprise Rossi after they were born. But due to his current banter with Spencer, you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold the secret for any longer.
“Rossi,” you grinned, very much waddling over to the two men, “You're incorrigible.”
“I know. It’s the Italian in me,” he replied, nonchalantly.
“Well, much to Spencer’s dismay I’m sure, you’ll be happy to know you’re getting your wish,” you said.
Rossi looked stunned for a moment. You were positive this was the only time in the years you’d known him that he’d ever been stunned speechless like this.
“We decided to name our son David Gabriel Reid,” Spencer beamed, “We didn’t want to cause any confusion on names, so we’re going to call him Gabriel, but he can still be your little Dave if you want.”
It finally looked like it had sunk in when Rossi pulled both you and Spencer into a big hug, smiling bigger than you’d ever thought possible.
“That’s perfectly fine by me,” he grinned, kissing the tops of yours and Spencer’s heads, “I’m gonna teach him to play ball and how to cook spaghetti carbonara.”
“Don’t forget, you’ll have two little girls to deal with too,” Spencer laughed.
“Oh don’t you worry. They’ll learn how to cook and drop kick anyone who even looks at them the wrong way,” Rossi smirked.
“That, I don’t doubt,” you snickered.
“Speaking of,” Tara asked, popping up in the conversation, “When are you going to tell us what you’re naming your three little geniuses?”
“Yeah, I wanna know too,” Luke piped in, also walking up to the now small gathering.
JJ, Matt, Emily and Penelope followed behind him.
“Well if you didn’t catch it before, Baby A—the boy—is going to be David Gabriel,” Spencer beamed, “After the best father figure, mentor, co-worker, friend and member of this crazy BAU family. I couldn’t think of a better name to give my son.”
There were cheers all around as everyone lifted their glasses of champagne—apple juice for you—and clinked them together in celebration. You couldn’t help the huge grin that spread across your face to see how happy it made the well known, lovable, David Rossi.
“What about the girls’ names though?” Emily asked once the noise had settled down.
“Well there’s a bit of a backstory to that before we tell you the names,” Spencer began.
“We chose Gabriel’s name together because we already knew we wanted to actually make part of his name after Rossi, but we each picked a name, separately. One for each girl. Spencer decided on a name for baby B and I, baby C.”
“It’s also kinda funny what we both came up with,” Spencer interjected.
“Before the babies are born, kid!” Rossi said, “What are the names?”
“Baby B is Abrielle Jade—a name Y/N said she wanted to name a little girl on our very first date.”
Luke whistled.
“I’d be surprised that you remembered that but then again, you’re you.”
“Believe me, I’d forgotten I’d told him that, myself,” you chuckled.”
“And the other little girl is?” JJ prompted.
“Spensa Rae,” you said, looking at Spencer, a twinkle in your eye, “I wanted to name her after her daddy in some way, but it’s unique enough to be her own name as well. Rae is after my grandmother, too.”
“Those are the cutest names!” Garcia squealed, “Perfect timing time to give you my present for little Gabriel, Abrielle and Spensa then.”
She hobbled off in a partial run—not able to move too fast because of the grass in the backyard and her high heels—and grabbed three gift bags. She came back, handing them to you.
“Open it, open it!” she beamed.
You laughed at her excitement, pretty excited yourself. You handed one bag to Spencer as you reached into one bag, then the second, pulling out two matching onesies.
You looked over to see Spencer pulling out a third matching onesie from the gift bag you’d given him.
“Read the front,” Penelope beamed.
Opening one, you saw it read Rossi’s Sous Chef #2.
You laughed, opening the other which had the exact same thing printed on the front, but instead of the number 2, there was a number 3. 
You peered at the one in Spencer’s hands, finding number one. 
“Penelope, these are great!” you laughed, showing Rossi the outfits.
“These babies are going to be so loved,” Spencer smiled demurely, his eyes shining bright with tears.
“They will have plenty of people to love them,” Tara said with a bright smile.
“Lots of arms to hold them and cuddle them,” Luke added.
“Hands to help change diapers,” JJ piped in.
“Lots of kisses and bedtime stories,” Rossi said.
“Plenty of kids to play with them,” Matt chuckled.
“And a godmother to spoil them!” Garcia beamed.
“It’s not just your little family growing,” Emily smiled, coming to stand in between you and Spencer, wrapping an arm around each of you.
She looked around at the team that filled the backyard on this wonderful, summer evening, all gathered to celebrate the miracle of life.
“It’s our BAU family growing, too.”
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512 notes · View notes
nxrthmizu · 4 years
Text
| me and you | Sugawara Koushi
»»——⍟——««
song | Night Changes - One Direction
pairing | Sugawara Koushi x Reader
words | 2.9k 
author’s note | Hi yes I am late but,,, Oh wait I have no excuses. Anyway, please reblog and comment if you enjoyed reading! Not sure if I’m still being shadowbanned :/ Not proofread so let me know it there are any mistakes! 
»»——⍟——««
cadowly’s songfic december mlist
»»——⍟——««
Goin' out tonight, changes into something red
His mouth dropped at the sight of you, a gentle smile on your lips as you walked into the room. You were dressed in a black cloak, a dark green scarf wrapped around your neck like a snake. The kids’ attention instantly gravitated towards you, a whole bunch of them swarming towards you, a walking clump of excited chatters and ‘Merry Christmas, L/N-sensei!’. 
Her mother doesn't like that kind of dress
“Hello everyone,” You replied with a laugh, tugging off your cloak and your scarf as you walked into the classroom of the pre-school where both you and Sugawara Koushi worked as teachers at. “Merry Christmas!” 
A blush crept up his cheeks when you undressed, proudly showing off a bright red sweater with what seemed to be Rudolph on it. The pre-school had organised a secret gift event, where everyone would buy a gift, wrap it, and leave it under the tree. Later on, everyone would get a chance to pick out one gift for themselves, and since the teachers were required to participate, Sugawara had picked out a sweater, wrapped it in a cute box, and left it under the tree in the teachers’ staffroom. He had never anticipated the fact that you would choose his gift, giving your reason for the choice as ‘It looks really nicely wrapped, whoever bought this must’ve put a lot of effort into it!’.
Everything she never had she's showin' off
“L/N-sensei, your sweater’s really cute!” One of your kids said with a beam. 
“Thank you!” A soft smile graced your lips as you glanced down at the sweater with a fond expression. “It’s from my secret santa!” 
The kids continued to chatter excitedly around you as you set down your cloak and your bag in Sugawara’s classroom, where both of your classes were having a joint Christmas party. 
“Merry Christmas, Suga-san.” You greeted with a smile, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “Your sweater’s really cute.” 
He glanced down in surprise, remembering with sudden shock that the sweater he was wearing came as a set with the one that he had wrapped. His was dark green, and also had Rudolph on it- Except Rudolph was standing in a different pose, of course. 
“Ah.” He coughed awkwardly. “Thank you. I like yours, too.” He knew without a doubt by the glint in your eyes, you were aware that the sweater you were wearing was from him. 
“Thanks! I really need to thank the person who got me this sweater.” At this point you were just teasing him, and boy was it working. Red flushed across Koushi’s cheeks, and it wasn’t because it was snowing outside. 
“Suga-sensei, you’re blushing!” One of the girls pointed out with a giggle. This caused a chain reaction throughout the classroom, the forty-or-so kids you had packed in Suga’s classroom rushing to the front, where he was sitting cross-legged on the carpet while wrapping some last-minute gifts. 
“Suga-sensei’s blushing!” Came the chorus of the kids’ exclamations. The red on his cheeks only darkened as he tried to laugh it off, but unfortunately for him, the red around his cheek, neck, and ears did not recede. 
You laughed softly. “Alright, alright. That’s enough. Who’s excited for the gift exchange?” 
The kids raised their hands and jumped around enthusiastically, some bragging loudly that they got amazing gifts for their classmates. Sugawara breathed a sigh of relief, glad that you had redirected the kids attention. 
“We still have a few students who aren’t here yet, so why don’t everyone leave their gifts under the tree first and we can play some small games while waiting for the rest of your friends, okay?” You suggested with a smile, the kids instantly rushing to grab their gifts from their bags to stash under the tree that both your classes had decorated together. 
“Thanks.” He smiled thankfully at you, praying that his blush had lightened up. 
Your eyes twinkled in amusement. “No problem.” 
»»——⍟——««
“Suga-sensei!” One of the girls approached him, pushing past his arms to settle into his lap. He chuckled, patting her hair as he gave her a questioning look. “I have a question!” 
“Well, go ahead.” He smiled. 
“Are you and L/N-sensei dating?” The kid whispered, looking up at him with saucer-sized, curious eyes. 
Sugawara coughed loudly, trying not to choke on his own embarrassment. “No! I mean... No. No we’re not.” 
“But she’s so pretty!” The girl scrunched up her eyebrows, not understanding why her teacher wouldn’t want to date the pretty teacher from the neighbouring class. “And she’s really nice!” 
“Well, yes, but...” He struggled with his words, trying to remember that you were across the room and that he couldn’t let the conversation get out of hand or he was done for. 
Little did he know, across the room, seated with your own kids, you were being confronted with the same question. “L/N-sensei, are you dating Suga-sensei?” One of your boys, who was cuddled up against your side while he munched on a piece of cake asked you, the rest of the kids tuning in to listen in interest. 
“No, but what made you think that?” A light blush painted your cheeks but you kept your cool, entertaining your kids with the conversation. 
One of the kids who were seated in a semi circle around you piped up. “Because he’s really nice to you!” 
“Because mommy said you two look nice together!” 
“Because his sweater looks a little like yours!” 
You smiled, your eyes flicking up to spot a flushed Sugawara across the classroom. “Well, we’re not dating. If we are I’ll let you guys know, okay?” 
It wasn’t just the kids, though. 
“How was the Christmas party?” One of Suga’s kid’s mother asked as she engulfed her child in a hug. The boy broke into a grin and begin ranting about the cake and the gift that he had picked out from under the tree. “That sounds great!” 
“I met new friends from L/N-sensei’s class!” The boy continued to say excitedly. 
“Ah, L/N-sensei?” The middle-aged woman glanced across the entrance of the pre-school, spotting you, also talking to one of your kids’ mother. “Wow, she’s really pretty!” (Suga had to stop himself from nodding vigorously in agreement.)
The boy agreed without holding back. “Yeah! Suga-sensei blushed when he talked to her!” The grey-haired teacher spluttered, not expecting his own student to betray him. 
“Is that so?” The mother instantly piped up, wiggling her eyebrows at Suga, whose face flushed again. “Suga-san, I think the both of you would look great together! Is she single?” 
“I-” He fumbled around with his words. “I think?” 
The mother shot him a smirk, walking away with her excited child as Sugawara blushed, drowning further in his growing affection for you. There you were, across the entrance, waving goodbye to one of your kids. “See you after Christmas break!” You smiled so brightly he was sure you could outshine Hinata, the literal sunshine child. 
The both of you sighed in relief as the last kid was picked up by his mother. At that rate, the both of you were ready to collapse from exhaustion- Dealing with kids during Christmas eve was one of the most draining things you had ever done, and the two of you were incredibly grateful that you had combined the class celebration- Because it meant only one classroom to clean up. 
“I’m exhausted already, and there’s still the staff celebration tonight.” You complained with a tired whine as you picked up all the trash left behind. 
He shot you a knowing smile, feeling his mental fatigue start to settle in. God, he loved kids, but they could be a handful at times. 
“L/N!” One of your female coworkers burst into Suga’s classroom, startling the two of you. Her expression turned sheepish as she apologised quickly. “I’m really sorry but- I can’t send you to the staff party tonight!” 
Your face dropped as you groaned. You couldn’t drive, and the party location was a reasonable distance from the nearest train station, and you didn’t feel like walking... 
“My mom suddenly told me she wanted me home for Christmas eve, so...” She winced. “I’m really sorry. Maybe you could get another teacher to send you?” 
“I could.” 
The both of you turned to look at Suga, who had paused halfway through sweeping the floor. “I’m going to the party. I could drive you.” 
“Perfect!” Your coworker clapped her hands a little too enthusiastically. Your eyes narrowed at her suspiciously as she very conveniently ignored your questioning gaze. “You can go with Suga-san, then. Sorry and thanks again!”
 »»——⍟——««
Drivin' too fast, moon is breakin' through her hair
“Wow.” Sugawara couldn’t help the way his jaw unhinged at the sight of you, clad in a tight-fitting red dress that hugged your curves in a way that left little to his imagination. “I mean. Um. You look great.” He offered, trying to fix his composure, heat bursting in blossoms across his neck, cheeks, and ears. 
“Thank you, you don’t look too bad yourself.” You replied gracefully, your heels clicking as you walked down the steps of your apartment. 
Sugawara had cleaned up from his sweater-dressed pre-school teacher look into a well-groomed man with soft grey locks, a dark-green dress-shirt with a Christmas tree patterning and black jeans. “T- Thanks.” He stuttered, rushing over to hold the door open for you, quite like the gentleman he had a reputation of being. 
She's headin' for somethin' that she won't forget
The ride started off a little tense until you started humming along to the song on the radio, enticing him into joining you. He could barely keep his eyes on the road- How could he, when he had an angel like you in his passenger seat, eyes blinking under the stars and your heavenly voice tickling his ears?
Havin' no regrets is all that she really wants
“Suga! Oh, hi L/N-san.” A male teacher greeted the two of you with wiggling eyebrows that instantly made the two of you look away from each other. “Well, get yourself some drinks, we’ve got quite the night ahead of us!” 
We're only gettin' older, baby
“Come on, the two of you have been sitting here for the whole night! Get on the dance floor!” 
The two of you were seated by the bar, nursing your respective drinks (Suga had a glass of carbonated water- He wasn’t allowed to get drunk and he’d be darned if he forgot his responsibility of driving you home) while sharing small-talk, primarily about your classes and what you do outside of work. Koushi enjoyed your presence; Conversation just seemed to flow when he was with you, and awkwardness a foreign concept that he had forgotten. The twinkle of your laugh was imprinted in his mind, your eyes curved into crescents and a giggle vibrating down your throat. 
“I don’t... Know how to dance.” You admitted shyly. 
Your coworker rolled her eyes. “Just get out there!” 
“I’ll go with.” Koushi laughed, setting his drink down. His hand found yours, in the maze of coloured strobe lights and the next thing you knew you were laughing, smiling, giggling as he brought you the centre of the dance floor, like he wanted to show off to the world just how special you were. 
You flushed in embarrassment, feeling multiple sets of eyes on you- Your coworkers’. “What do I do?” The whisper was shot to the grey-haired man, who was already moving to the music like he was born to dance. 
“Just listen to the music and focus on the beat.” He laughed, taking both of your hands into his, jerking you onto the beat and directing your movements until you got a hang of it. “There you go!” 
And I've been thinkin' about it lately
Everyone in the room must’ve been able to see how in love with you he was, Suga mused with a tiny groan. There were literal hearts in his eyes when he looked at you, your red dress dancing in the air alongside you, a slightly-drunk smile on your lips. The pounding music faded away from him, the only sound he heard being your angelic laugh. At that point he was sure your laugh could cure the world’s deadliest diseases. 
Does it ever drive you crazy
“I’ve never had that much fun.” Breathless, you smiled widely at him, both of you (Well, mostly you) stumbling back to the bar. 
His eyes softened at the sight of your tousled hair, your gleaming eyes, the thin sheen of sweat on your skin. You looked like you hadn’t went to a club to dance in ten years- Which, judging from how stiff you were when you were first dragged onto the floor- Was probably true. 
Just how fast the night changes?
“Hey... Can we get out of here?” You asked after a while, giving him a mini-heart-attack when you turned to look at him. “It’s getting too loud for me.” 
“Sure,” He replied easily. Heck, you could ask him to get on a plane to anywhere on the planet and he’d probably still say sure. Koushi knew he had fallen for you, and when he fell, he fell hard. 
Everything that you've ever dreamed of
The two of you grabbed a couple of rental bikes a little away from the club, scanning the barcodes with your phones before pedalling away. Your red dress fluttered in the wind from under your coat, your hair loosened and a couple strands waving at him with a laugh while they flew behind you. 
Disappearing when you wake up
He wished he could continue pedalling behind you forever; God, what he would give to have Christmas eve last forever. Your laugh played on loop inside his mind, the ring of your giggle warming him, insuring his body against the cold winter. 
But there's nothing to be afraid of
By the time morning came, would you remember? Would you remember the park that the two of you stopped at because you wanted to stargaze? Would you remember the love-struck way he stared at you while your eyes were fixated on the dots of white up in the sky, just out of your reach? Would you remember the way he took a breath of courage and intertwined your fingers together just as the clock struck 12? 
Even when the night changes
“Merry Christmas, Suga-san!” You smiled, looking at the time on your watch. 
It will never change me and you
“Merry Christmas, L/N-san.” He replied, an identical smile on his lips. You leaned closer, your lips connected with his as sparks exploded as loudly as the fireworks up above in his heart. 
“W- Wait!” Koushi pushed you away, cheeks flushed and painted a visible scarlet despite the dim lightning of the park. “You- You’re drunk. I’m not going to take advantage of you like this, you’ll regret this when you wake up.” 
A pout crossed your lips, but you figured he had a point. Even you knew that you were slightly drunk- It was the boldness of your actions, the way stars seemed to litter the air around your silver-haired coworker, the shine in his eyes that were a little brighter than usual. 
“I won’t.” You pursed your lips. “I probably won’t dare to do it again if I’m fully sober.” 
»»——⍟——««
“Suga-san?” 
He swore he almost had a heart attack when he woke up at 8am and his phone was ringing, your caller ID staring him in the face, urging him to pick up. “Yeah? Do you need anything, L/N-san?” 
“No, uh, can I- Can I come over?” 
If he didn’t have a heart attack at seeing your caller ID, he had a heart attack at your request. “Uh- Sure? Why?” 
“I... I’m not too sure either. I’ll explain when I get there.” 
Christmas morning was a wonderland of white falling from the sky, your window sill covered with an inch-thick of cold, powdered sugar. There was a faint throb in your head- You had drunk a little bit more after returning to the party with Sugawara. Fumbling around, reaching for your phone, you turned it on, blinking in surprise as you stared at the three words etched on your lockscreen wallpaper. 
‘Kiss’. ‘Sugawara’. ‘Koushi’. 
“What did I do last night?” You mumbled, sitting up. Flashes of a park, a sparkling night sky, and a silver-haired coworker flipped through your mind like a flipbook with a dozen pages missing. At last, you figured you might as well call the man in question- Surely he knew what you did last night. 
»»——⍟——««
“I... Woke up to this on my lockscreen.” You explained, showing him your phone. Red burst across Koushi’s cheeks like cherry blossoms, and for a moment you wondered if spring had come early. “I figured there was no harm if I came over.” 
“So... Are you going to do it?” He eyed you, a mixture of shy and curiosity. 
In one swift movement, you jerked the front of his shirt, pulling him to you for a kiss. When you pulled back, Sugawara Koushi was a stuttering, blushing mess who had apparently forgot how to use his words. 
“No harm in trying.” You shrugged with a tint of a smile across your lips. “So... Did you forget how to use words or...?” 
“Dammit, you can’t just do that to me like this!” 
»»——⍟——««
taglist. @mrs-kuroojinguji @procrastination-lady ​@drippinginhoneyandgold ​@shoyosun​@aka-a-shii ​@shibayamasbae ​@churochuu​ @seijohlogy​ @dearsukuna 
send an ask to either @owlywrites or @cadenceh2o to be a part of Cadowly’s Songfic December’s taglist!
hello sorry for how late it is but uhhh yeah 
»»——⍟——««
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Anime i’ve Watched
That begin with a N (Part 2)!
Yep this is how i’m going to bring over all the anime and manga i’ve watched and posted about on the old blog. It’s not so detailed but it will have to do. Anything new I watch or read from this point on will have their own posts.
Net-juu no Susume  (Recovery of an MMO Junkie):
Genres: Game, Comedy, Romance, ONA 
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Synopsis:  For the first time since graduating high school, 30-year-old Moriko Morioka is unemployed—and she couldn't be happier. Having quit her long-standing job of over 11 years, Moriko quickly turns to online games to pass her now-plentiful free time, reinventing herself as the handsome and dashing male hero "Hayashi" in the MMO Fruits de Mer. With the pesky societal obligations of the real world out of the way, she blissfully dives headfirst into the realm of the game, where she promptly meets the kind and adorable healer Lily. Befriending each other almost instantly, the two become inseparable just as Moriko herself becomes more and more engrossed in her new "life" as Hayashi. Eventually, Moriko adopts the reclusive lifestyle in its entirety, venturing out from the safety of her apartment only when absolutely necessary. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Moriko, a timid 28-year-old corporate worker named Yuuta Sakurai has also logged onto Fruits de Mer from the other side of town. Coincidentally bumping into each other at the convenience store one night, both write off their meeting as no more than just another awkward encounter with a stranger—however, fate has more in store for them than they think. [Written by MAL Rewrite]
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My Rating: 8/10
Finished airing in 2017 with a total of 10 episodes
My Thoughts: The male lead wears glasses! In case that’s something anyone but me cares about... Aside from that I can’t remember much about this one which is never a sign of an amazing anime so it’s up to you friends! Will you watch it or leave it?! 
Nijiiro Days:
Genres: Comedy, Romance, School, TV Short, Shoujo, Slice of Life
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Synopsis:  Nijiiro Days follows the colorful lives and romantic relationships of four high school boys—Natsuki Hashiba, a dreamer with delusions of love; Tomoya Matsunaga, a narcissistic playboy who has multiple girlfriends; Keiichi Katakura, a kinky sadist who always carries a whip; and Tsuyoshi Naoe, an otaku who has a cosplaying girlfriend. When his girlfriend unceremoniously dumps him on Christmas Eve, Natsuki breaks down in tears in the middle of the street and is offered tissues by a girl in a Santa Claus suit. He instantly falls in love with this girl, Anna Kobayakawa, who fortunately attends the same school as him. Natsuki's pursuit of Anna should have been simple and uneventful; however, much to his dismay, his nosy friends constantly meddle in his relationship, as they strive to succeed in their own endeavors of love. [Written by MAL Rewrite]
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My Rating: 8/10
Finished airing in 2016 with a total of 24 episodes. Each episode running about 13 minutes in length. 
My Thoughts: Love the manga, which I keep meaning to finish because it is a completed title... and I should probably finish it before manga gets even harder to find online with the way things are currently going... 
Anywho, the anime! Pretty good. The episodes are about half that of a normal anime but you have a 24 episode count so it’s basically the same as having a 12 episodes run with the usual running time!  I’d watch it is you want more content after the manga, but keep in mind that the anime does not cover the entirety of the manga! 
No Game No Life:
Genres: Game, Adventure, Comedy, Supernatural, Ecchi, Fantasy
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Synopsis:  No Game No Life is a surreal comedy that follows Sora and Shiro, shut-in NEET siblings and the online gamer duo behind the legendary username "Blank." They view the real world as just another lousy game; however, a strange e-mail challenging them to a chess match changes everything—the brother and sister are plunged into an otherworldly realm where they meet Tet, the God of Games. The mysterious god welcomes Sora and Shiro to Disboard, a world where all forms of conflict—from petty squabbles to the fate of whole countries—are settled not through war, but by way of high-stake games. This system works thanks to a fundamental rule wherein each party must wager something they deem to be of equal value to the other party's wager. In this strange land where the very idea of humanity is reduced to child's play, the indifferent genius gamer duo of Sora and Shiro have finally found a real reason to keep playing games: to unite the sixteen races of Disboard, defeat Tet, and become the gods of this new, gaming-is-everything world. [Written by MAL Rewrite]
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My Rating: 7/10
Finished airing in 2014 with a total of 12 episodes. 
My Thoughts: I have a laundry list of things i’m meaning to watch, read or do. Watching the No Game No Life movie on Netflix is one of those things. Anyways! I recall this one being alright, nice art/ animation/ character design and an interesting premise but too short and underdeveloped. One of those animes that may have benefited greatly from a longer run or second season. 
No.6:
Genres: Action, Sci-fi, Mystery, Drama
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Synopsis:  Many years ago, after the end of a bloody world war, mankind took shelter in six city-states that were peaceful and perfect... at least on the surface. However, Shion—an elite resident of the city-state No. 6—gained a new perspective on the world he lives in, thanks to a chance encounter with a mysterious boy, Nezumi. Nezumi turned out to be just one of many who lived in the desolate wasteland beyond the walls of the supposed utopia. But despite knowing that the other boy was a fugitive, Shion decided to take him in for the night and protect him, which resulted in drastic consequences: because of his actions, Shion and his mother lost their status as elites and were relocated elsewhere, and the darker side of the city began to make itself known. Now, a long time after their life-altering first meeting, Shion and Nezumi are finally brought together once again—the former elite and the boy on the run are about to embark on an adventure that will, in time, reveal the shattering secrets of No. 6. [Written by MAL Rewrite]
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My Rating: 8/10
Finished airing in 2011 with a total of 11 episodes. 
My Thoughts: Just read the manga and watch this as extra, I can’t remember if the anime covered the entirety of the manga’s story but either way check out that source material first! The manga series is also completed which is a huge bonus. High point: The relationship between the two leads. 
Noragami:
Genres: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Supernatural, Shounen
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Synopsis: In times of need, if you look in the right place, you just may see a strange telephone number scrawled in red. If you call this number, you will hear a young man introduce himself as the Yato God. Yato is a minor deity and a self-proclaimed "Delivery God," who dreams of having millions of worshippers. Without a single shrine dedicated to his name, however, his goals are far from being realized. He spends his days doing odd jobs for five yen apiece, until his weapon partner becomes fed up with her useless master and deserts him. Just as things seem to be looking grim for the god, his fortune changes when a middle school girl, Hiyori Iki, supposedly saves Yato from a car accident, taking the hit for him. Remarkably, she survives, but the event has caused her soul to become loose and hence able to leave her body. Hiyori demands that Yato return her to normal, but upon learning that he needs a new partner to do so, reluctantly agrees to help him find one. And with Hiyori's help, Yato's luck may finally be turning around.
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My Rating: 8/10
Finished airing in 2014 with a total of 12 episodes. 
My Thoughts: Yes! Watch it! Love it! And also read it. Big downside: The updates for this manga are slow and the story is unfinished obviously. Upside: Two whole seasons of anime goodness, and if we’re really lucky we’ll eventually get another? Ok maybe not... but a girl can dream! Also this anime has one of my all time favourite opening themes! Amazing! 
Noragami Aragoto:
Genres: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Supernatural, Shounen
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Synopsis:  Yato and Yukine have finally mended their relationship as god and Regalia, and everyone has returned to their daily life. Yato remains a minor and unknown deity who continues taking odd jobs for five yen apiece in the hopes of one day having millions of worshippers and his own grand shrine. Hiyori Iki has yet to have her loose soul fixed by Yato, but she enjoys life and prepares to attend high school nonetheless. Taking place immediately after the first season, Noragami Aragoto delves into the complicated past between Yato and the god of war Bishamon. The female god holds a mysterious grudge against Yato, which often results in violent clashes between them. It doesn't help that Bishamon's most trusted and beloved Regalia, Kazuma, appears to be indebted to Yato. When lives are on the line, unraveling these mysteries and others may be the only way to correct past mistakes. [Written by MAL Rewrite]
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My Rating: 9/10
Finished airing in 2015 with a total of 13 episodes. 
My Thoughts: Another amazing opening theme! Seriously this series really knew how to pick them! Also have crushes on a solid chunk of the cast... so there’s that. 
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calilili · 1 year
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21st Century #Artist ; Baby Steppin’ at the #CaliLiliIndies ™️ #movies #music #newartist #mybodymychoice
while working on the NEXT releases and the NEXT movie and #album WE SOOOO appreciate your support in getting the word out wider for our first baby project ! She’s now a toddler … #eVeNgodThisFemaleIsNotYetRated 🎬 And origina soundtrack #thisfemaleisnotyetrated 🎵 toddling all over the world and THANK YOU ! we have heard from so many people inspired by the message of acceptance ,…
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jinterlude · 4 years
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Drunk on You
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↳ Header is made by yours truly, and the photo used can be found here.
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—Pairing: Yoongi x Reader (female OC) [former]; Hoseok x Reader (female OC) [current] —Genre(s): Angst & Slight-Romance —AUs/Tropes: Post-Breakup, Engagement, Lovers turned Enemies Trope, First Love Trope —Warning(s)/Rating: mentions of infidelity, drunk confessions, swearing | NC-17 —Word Count: 1,014 —Summary: You didn’t realize this, but you needed closure with a certain someone that broke your heart years ago...
—A/N: Hello everyone! Here’s another drink request, ordered by @inkedxclouds​ aka the beautiful Bee! Her drink order is, Yoongi + Whiskey + Knees and let me tell you, I really went off with the angst in this one. Now, I need a hug! Anyway, let me know what you think! I always appreciate feedback (constructive or positive)!
Also, this is written for @bangtan-dreamland​​​​​​‘s Drinks + Drabbles game! Thank you Eris and BHQ for creating this fun net game!
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You run your thumb over the cold diamond for the tenth time that rainy afternoon. As you do so, your mind can’t help but drift back to a specific memory—a special moment when your fiancé proposes to you on the eve of your 3rd anniversary. 
A faint smile graces your lips as you recall the endless tears you’ve shed the minute you’ve registered Hoseok getting down on one knee.  You remember so vividly how wide his smile is when you’ve accepted his proposal—yet why aren’t you over the moon right now? 
You have every single bridal magazine, known to man, scatter all over your glass coffee table. Yet, you aren’t in any hurry to solidify any wedding details. 
You’ve grown numb to the planning process, and it’s all Min fucking Yoongi’s fault. 
How dare that cheating bastard invade your life after years of not speaking to each other. 
The fucking sad part of that is that you’ve allowed him to do so…
But, no more. You are officially done with that unfaithful asshole. 
Or so you think… 
Letting out a long, defeated sigh, you forcibly remove yourself from the window; a handprint is left on the window glass from the warmth that your skin radiates. You shuffle your body over to the sofa, mentally preparing yourself to start planning for your upcoming Autumn nuptials to Hoseok next year. 
As you pick up one of the bridal magazines, filled with a catalog of bridesmaids dresses, sounds of harsh pounding bounces off the four walls of your apartment. Then, your phone goes off, easily startling you. 
“What the fuck…” You mutter as you stand up from your seat and walk over to the kitchen counter, where your phone is charging. Your brow furrows as you don’t recognize the caller ID. 
With curiosity getting the best of you, you unhook your phone and swipe to answer it. Though, a look of regret washes over you as you register the voice behind the call. 
“Yoongi. I told you to stop calling—” 
“I love you, ___. P-please answer the door.” Yoongi abruptly cuts you off. His words are slurred, and you can’t quite pinpoint the emotion behind them. 
Anger? 
Anguish? 
If it’s both of them, then he absolutely has no right to feel that way, especially not after breaking your heart by slipping with some random bimbo from the bar. 
Clenching your jaw, you stalk up to your front door as you end the phone call. Your fingers hover over the lock as you internally debate if you should open the door for the prick or not. 
“I better not regret this…” You mumble, turning the lock and opening the door. The second that the door flings open, Yoongi stumbles over, falling onto his knees. 
Rolling your eyes and shaking your head, you kneel, meeting his gaze as you help the drunken fool up. 
“Jesus, Yoongi. You do realize that it’s barely 4 P.M., and you’re already this drunk.” You scold him, placing him against the wall, hoping that it’ll keep him centered. 
“I can’t help it, ___. I always end up drunk on you.” He confesses in signature lazy yet slurred speech. 
Your eyes drip with worry, but you soon shake it off. Yoongi doesn’t deserve an inch of your kindness. Yoongi lost all right to your body and soul after that infamous night. 
Crossing your arms over your chest, you give him a look. That basically says, “you better explain why you’re here or else I’m calling the cops,” and lean against the wall across from Yoongi. 
Before speaking, a tiny burp escapes him following a drunken, amused giggle. 
“Look. I know that I’m the last person you want wobbling in your living room, but I miss y-you, ___,” His eyes slowly flood with tears. Throughout your years of dating Yoongi, you’ve never seen him this raw with emotion. “Please. I made the biggest mistake ever by throwing away a wonderful woman for a person I barely remember the name to,” He steps forward you, “I tried dating other people, but they could never hold a candle to you; hence, why I resorted to drinking. I needed to feel something. Anything.” Yoongi whispers; his voice is so broken that it causes your heart to tighten. 
You suddenly avert your gaze, becoming uncomfortable by Yoongi’s intense stare. Then, he grasps your hands as he willingly falls to his knees. His eyes practically begging you to take him back. 
Now, it’s your turn for your eyes to glisten. You let out a few sniffles as you try to remain firm in your resolve.
While you never forget your first love, Yoongi has hurt you in the worst possible way. Hoseok, on the other hand, cherishes you like the queen you are. 
There is no contest. Your heart has and will always belong to Jung Hoseok. 
With a sincere smile, you gently help Yoongi back up and say, 
“I’m sorry that you’ve resorted to drinking, but I’m not sorry for ending things between us,” You maneuver around him, standing next to your front door, “You did this to yourself the minute your lips pressed firmly against another woman’s lips. I think you should go, and please, do not come back, nor call me after today.”
The defeated man slowly nods his head, finally accepting his loss. He heads over to the front door, giving you one final glance. 
“For what’s worth, I’m pleased that you’ve found Hoseok. From what Seokjin tells me, he treats you well, and that’s all I can ask from him.” 
“Thanks, Yoongs…”
“Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. I wish nothing but the best for you guys. Honestly.” 
“Goodbye, Yoongi…”
And then you slowly close the door behind him, locking the door. 
It's as if the door acts as a metaphor for officially ending that chapter in your life. It’s as if God grants you that closure you so desperately desire. 
Smiling softly to yourself, your phone rings; a familiar ringtone echoes throughout your home. 
Rushing over to your phone, you swiftly answer the call. 
“Hobi!” 
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Drunk on You is copyright 2020 by jinterlude, all rights reserved.
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rogerscupboard · 6 years
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John Deacon Imagine- Christmas Cookies (Angst)
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A/N: 1227 words. Based on a blurb request from an anon, for my 1k celebration! The request was for Deacy unrequited angst, with the words Christmas and baking. This broke my heart a little to write, I gotta say. Female!Reader with a boyfriend. Full angst, rated T for language.
•~•~•~•~•
It was a cold and snowy Christmas Eve night. You were sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, enjoying some hot cocoa by the fire. Everything was festive and peaceful, and you found yourself beginning to doze off against your boyfriend’s shoulder. All was well.
That is, until the doorbell rang.
The sound of the bell jolted you out of your peaceful sleep, and your boyfriend looked at you expectantly. You sighed, nodding at him. “I’ll get it.” It was probably carolers.
When you swung open the door, however, your heart stopped.
It was John, standing on your doorstep, shivering in the cold… holding a plate of Christmas cookies.
“John, what are you doing here?” you asked in a hushed whisper, anxiously glancing over your shoulder to make sure your boyfriend didn’t hear you. “You know what he said he’d do to you if he saw you talking to me again!”
“I know. I’m- I’m sorry. I just... I made these for you,” he stammered out, face flushed pink from both the cold and his nerves. Your stomach churned. What were you supposed to do?
John was one of your best friends from childhood. You used to be inseparable, and you had even had a crush on him for years. Of course, that was before you met your boyfriend. John knew that he made you happy, and yet he still had chosen to confess the feelings he’d had for you... a year into your relationship.
Nothing was more painful than knowing that, if things had worked out differently, you could have been with John. Once your boyfriend found out, he told John to stay away from you. You hadn’t seen him in months. And now, here he was, shivering in the cold, standing on your doorstep, with a plate full of cookies that he had baked himself.
You stepped outside and shut the door, so your boyfriend wouldn’t hear you saying John’s name.
“John, I… I can’t accept these. What would I tell him?” you stuttered, incredulous. He swallowed hard, unable to make eye contact. He looked like he had something to say. “John…”
“I miss you,” he breathed out, forcing himself to look at you, and your heart broke when you saw the tears welling up in his eyes. “God, I don’t know what to do without you. You’re my best friend, do you know how hard it is to just not talk to you?”
“Of course I know, John!” you burst out, frustrated, crossing your arms across your chest to combat the biting cold. “I just… I can’t do this. You know I can’t.”
“It’s not fair to you. He’s not fair to you,” John began, but something caught in his throat. You felt your heart ache. The feelings you had held for him were starting to bubble up inside of you, feelings you hadn’t let affect you in months.
“What do you want from me?” you asked, exasperated. John bit his lip, looking away. His hands were shaking as he held the plate of cookies. He hadn’t worn any gloves. “Did you expect I’d just invite you in? That I’d kiss you? That I’d just throw this past year and a half away? I can’t, John, and you know that-”
“I love you!” John blurted out, and your mouth fell open as you felt your stomach drop. He was breathing hard, looking at you with desperate eyes. You felt heat rising in your face as tears started to drip down your cheeks.
“What the hell do you expect me to say to that?” you asked, voice wavering in shock.
He opened his mouth, but no sound came out. Looking at the ground, he finally muttered, “I… I don’t know.”
“Maybe if you had said something two fucking years ago it would’ve mattered,” you said, anger boiling up inside you, tears running down your face. “How the fuck could you be so selfish? Coming here on Christmas Eve? Do you think of nobody but yourself?”
“I think of you,” he said desperately, “every day-“
“Do you think I don’t think about you?” you asked between sobs, overwhelmed by the number of emotions flashing through your mind all at once.
“I just wanted to know if you felt the same,” he breathed out, hands shaking, the cookies on the plate rattling against each other.
“Maybe I did love you once,” you said forcefully, voice breaking. “But it doesn’t matter anymore. It’s over. It’s done, John. I’ve moved on, and it’s about time you did too.”
A single tear rolled down his cheek, and you felt a sudden wave of regret. You knew your feelings for him weren’t gone, but you hadn’t realized just how strong they were. Your heart ached to hold him, to kiss him, to wipe his tears away. But you couldn’t. Of course you couldn’t.
All you could do was leave him outside, in the cold.
And it broke your heart.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered. “John, you… you have no idea how sorry I am.”
“I know,” he said softly. “It was stupid to come here… I’m sorry too.”
“It’s fine, really,” you added, wiping your eyes as carefully as you could, not wanting your boyfriend to see that you had been crying. That was the last thing you needed to explain.
“I… I should go back inside now. You should go home. Go spend Christmas with somebody… somebody that’ll give you the love you deserve,” you said before you realized the words that were coming out of your mouth.
He looked at you longingly, as if he wanted to just come up the stairs and kiss you there and then. But he didn’t. Of course he didn’t.
He swallowed hard, sniffling, trying to regain the composure he had lost. He glanced down at the cookies he had made for you. Your heart felt like it had been ripped in two.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, John nodded. “Thanks for listening,” he said softly. “I’m at least glad that I told you.”
You nodded in response. “Goodbye, John,” you said gently, your voice breaking on his name.
“Goodnight,” he said, his voice wavering. He began to turn away and walk down the steps, and you turned to go back inside.
He called your name.
You turned around.
“Happy Christmas,” he said, his cheeks red, eyes puffy from the tears. Disheveled. And still, far too beautiful. Your heart was in shatters.
“Merry Christmas, John,” you called back, feeling broken, forcing yourself to look away from the man that, in another life, could have been yours.
You walked back inside, shaken, trying to regain your composure as you joined your boyfriend on the couch.
“Who was that? You were out there for a while.”
“Carolers,” you said softly. “Waited for them to finish their song.”
“Too bad we don’t have any cookies. You could have given them something.”
You swallowed hard, leaning into your boyfriend, your heart suddenly aching for someone else.
“Yeah,” you whispered, your mind elsewhere. “I wish I could have.”
Snow began to fall gently outside the window, and the Christmas music played quietly on the radio. Your boyfriend kissed you on the cheek, but you no longer felt whole.
Your heart was with someone else, someone with a plate of cookies and nowhere to go.
And he was gone.
•~•~•~•~•
Tagged: @rogers-wristbands @roger-maylor @roger-taylor-owns-my-wigg @ceruleanrainblues @extravagantplant
A/N: Thank you guys so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it (as much as you can enjoy angst ksjdkdkd). You can find my other writing here, and I hope you have a beautifully happy holiday 💖
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mymind--themess · 6 years
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Sugarbean -- Chapter One
It had been a week since your meeting with Ashe, and you still couldn’t get her out of your head. Work for you had been rather slow this past week due to two of your usual clients being either incarcerated or dead, and you were back up north, residing in New York state once more. You lived in a fairly large city; It wasn’t New York City, but it was second in size -- Buffalo, New York. It might as well have been NYC considering the hustle and bustle of the two cities were quite alike, as were the crime rates. Currently, you were nestled by the fireplace in your small apartment, lounging casually. Sure, you could definitely afford a mansion with all the cash you made in weapons dealing, but you preferred this adorable apartment and staying low. You were on the phone with a dear childhood friend who you had met at the best orphanage you had resided in, Marianna. (A/N: If you’ve ever read my reaper x reader, you will know exactly who she is)
“How was that trip down south to Deadlock Gorge?” Marianna asked knowingly.
“Hot,” You mumbled with a scoff as you unconsciously began to rub the beautiful necklace she had gotten you and B.O.B had been the one to give to you. “How’s Italy? Beautiful like always?”
“You know it; Although, it has definitely been a weird trip. So much has happened; I really cannot wait to see you and tell you everything at the annual reunion! You’re coming in this year, right?”
“Of course! That orphanage has been my home since I was 13; I wouldn’t miss reunion week for the world.” You replied as you smiled.
“Great! Anyways, how did the cowgirl casanova look?” Marianna said slyly.
You moved your hand to your chest in a mock dramatic gesture. “Finer than a bottle of wine!” You declared, causing Marianna to giggle.
“I don’t get why you two aren’t a thing yet; Just make a move!” She chided you through laughs, totally serious even though her tone was full of laughter.
You sighed in embarrassment. “You know I can’t! You remember our rule?”
“(Y/N)! That rule doesn’t apply if you like a cowgirl! There are no rules when it comes to cowgirls — She’s a modern day outlaw.”
You sighed, biting your lip. Maybe you should make a small mov-, no! What if she totally disregarded how you felt? You would be so damn embarressed! What if she wasn’t even in to females? “I don’t even think she’s into females.”
Marianna could be hear scoffing over the phone. “Oh no, she definitely swings the female way. Back when her and my brother Jesse were close, she told him all she fancied was girls.”
“Elizabeth Caledonia Ashe did not say fancy.” You replied in disbelief.
“You don’t know her backstory at all, do you?”
“Do... do you?”
“Jesse simply told me she was rich; Like — My grandmother’s level rich. Filthy rich.”
You thought on that for a moment. Well, it would certainly explain how she’s able to afford the weapons you sell. You were one of the most expensive dealers around because you dealt with high end clients. You never really thought of where they money came from; It dawned on you, she must’ve been pretty wealthy for the amount she could buy at a time. Which made her even more powerful in your head. You had always focused on just Ashe, never about where her money was from. “I hadn’t thought about that.”
“Because you were too busy thinking about her ass.”
You scoffed, “No... well once, but no! I was thinking about her eyes to be honest.”
“... You sound as sappy as my sister gets over her girlfriend; It makes me want to chug vodka until it drowns out you two.”
You smiled, “Hey, Marisol got her girl; Knowing Marisol she’s probably as sweet as pie. She’s ahead of me by a few steps.”
Marianna sighed, “Yeah, actually her girl is a hacker for Talon. So sweet as pie my ass. You two have always had this thing for someone screaming the word Badass.”
You couldn’t help but snigger. “Can’t wait til someone bad comes your way.”
“I’d like to see them try.” Marianna sighed. “Well, I gotta go. See you at the reunion?”
“Unless I’m wherever you are before then.”
“Pretty sure you won’t be wherever Talon Headquarters are, heh. But hey, I will be back and forth between there and my lab on the Lunar Colony! Come take a trip to the moon, maybe? I have some new gadgets of mine for you to inspect and sell,”
You nodded, sitting up from the couch as your other phone gave off a sound to notify you of a text message. That was your “business” phone. “Sounds like a plan; Just text me when you’re about to leave a few hours in advance and come scoop me up!”
“Okay! Ciao!”
“See ya!”
The two of you hung up as you picked up your other phone to see “ASHE DG” pop up. You practically almost dropped your phone from momentarily jumping for joy.
Oh!
OH!
It was her, and so soon!
“She must’ve really went through those new bombs quick.” You mumbled aloud as your heart rate calmed somewhat.
With a quick sigh, you unlocked your phone and read the text message.
Ashe 5:08 p.m. : Hey Sugarbean~
You 5:09 p.m. : I didn’t expect to hear from you so soon, Ashe. How can I help you?
You sent the text with a deep breath. You really had to stop acting like this with Ashe, you just had to! It was making you so vulnerable with your emotions, and heaven forbid she died or something! You’d be such a mess!
Soon, the notification went off again, and you quickly read the message.
Ashe 5:11 p.m. : Maybe I missed ya, darlin’. Just texting because I have a special proposition for you.
Typing a response, you raised an eyebrow as you mumbled the response aloud.
You 5:13 p.m. : Ha ha, very funny Ashe. What’s the proposition?
Ashe 5:16 p.m. : The boys and I are having a little New Year’s Eve bash. B.O.B wants you to come and I wanted to talk to you about looking into some more of those modified weapons; I’ve got the first stick-up of the year planned as somethin’ special.
A New Year’s Eve party, eh? Well, honestly, you didn’t see a reason to refuse. Go to the party, find out what Ashe wants specifically, go to the Lunar Colony to ask Marianna to build it, and then go for reunion week. It actually worked out perfectly — it was a win-win in your mind.
You 5:20 p.m.: Sounds good to me! Where’s the party going to be?
You held your breath for the response, impatient at best as you waited for the details to arrive to your phone.
Ashe 5:25 p.m.: At my ranch, which I just remembered you haven’t been to yet, Sugarbean. It’s in South Carolina, and one of the many spots I own. It’s very big and pretty hard to miss; the Desert Rose Manor. I’ll have B.O.B send you the location.
You sucked in a breath. “Wow, she really is that rich.” You said softly, biting your lip. Oh, man! You figured you had no shot in hell with Ashe.
You 5:27 p.m.: Alright, see you then!
Meanwhile, in one of the various places Ashe owned somewhere near Route 66, Ashe grinned wildly at her phone as her men stared to her in anticipation. “Did ya ask her boss?!” Charlie whispered anxiously. They all just had to know, y’know? Even B.O.B had sat down for this: everyone was trying to anticipate how the situation would turn out. This could either be very good, or very bad. If you said no, Ashe would be sad as all hell and hide it under anger she would lash at everyone else. If you said yes, you’d be practically answering the guys’ prayers for Ashe to be in a good mood before going back to the fierce leader she was in the morning.
Ashe looked up as she recieved your last text, placing her phone down and looking to her gang. “Bring on the liquor boys; Suagrbean said yes.”
Cheers errupted as B.O.B clapped for his master before walking up to her and tilting his head as if he had something to show Ashe. Ashe knew that look and gave a small pout. “Is it bad?”
The robot shook his head no and turned to walk into another room, away from the loud sounds or riled men and bottles popping open. Ashe followed and closed the door behind her. “What is it?”
B.O.B pressed his arm a few times until a voice capture popped up labled (Y/N). Ashe’s eyes widened. “B.O.B, did you... did you put a mic in the necklace?”
B.O.B stared at his human. Was it not clear for his mistress? Perhaps he had overstepped a bit, but he just hated seeing her miserable and longing for you. Especially when he could tell you felt the same. He swore to God, humans were weird.
Ashe smirked, “B.O.B, you absolute sneaky devil! I love ya! What’d she say?”
Lo and behold, B.O.B had set the mic to capture when Ashe’s name was brought up as well as Deadlock Gorge. B.O.B had your whole phone call with Marianna recorded and he played it back for Ashe until she blushed a bit with wide eyes. You hadn’t known she was rich from the jump, and didn’t even care? You weren’t afraid of who she was, just of the heartbreak of her denying you? You were just as afriad to screw this whole thing up as she was? You got lost in her eyes like she found herself getting lost in your own (e/c) orbs?
This changed everything. There was no more playing games now.
Ashe was going to have you.
And nobody else would.
Not ever.
“Thanks B.O.B, really. You always know just what to do to wake me up.”
B.O.B nodded and gestured back to the gang as if to ask Ashe if she’d like to go back in.
Ashe thought about it, before shaking her head as she crossed her arms. “Nah, not really thinking about drinking right now. What if I drunk text? I might send a nude to my Sugarbean and as much as I know now she’d enjoy it...that’d be a dumb move. Come on now, I don’t want her to think it was a drunken decision. I will win her over by being a gentlewoman to my Sugarbean. I might be a lot of things, but you didn’t raise a complete heathen.”
Ashe smirked, fixing her hat as she looked out of the large windows and down upon Route 66. “I am one hell of a winner though, and I know exactly how to play this card you’ve just dealt me.”
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calililiindies · 3 years
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https://music.apple.com/us/album/this-female-is-not-yet-rated/1402313761
🍎 Apple Music
Eve N' God: This Female Is Not Yet Rated by Cali Lili https://itunes.apple.com/us/movie/eve-n-god-this-female-is-not-yet-rated/id1447735793
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don-lichterman · 2 years
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Cali Lili’s : Eve N God This Female Is Not Yet Rated (with original soundtrack)
Cali Lili’s : Eve N God This Female Is Not Yet Rated (with original soundtrack)
After the first minute, I knew this would not be an LA – guns – and –  car – crash film. eVe N’god this female is not yet rated™ ©CaliLili™ from Cali Lili @CaliLiliIndies™feMt0™ on Vimeo. There was artistry, care and attention to detail, but most of all an homage to intelligence – allowing the audience to think for themselves.  Cali dares us to sit and watch or  else,  just – turn on a re – run…
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