#GIVE ME BACK HUMAN TIFF PLEASE

[tiffanys-nailfile]

I haven’t watched the season finale yet but I do have twitter and EXCUSE ME WHAT THE FUCK

[theragethatisdesire]

hello!! 🥰 could i please get #359??

i literally do not care who it's with, i trust you to give us a tasty meal 😫 go nuts bb

hiiiii tiff <3 so i'm gonna modify this one a bit to be more in line with my personal writing style but like....why is this screaming gojo to me...and to think i'm so afraid of writing him but i think it's unavoidable here ...

359. "So desperate for it, aren't you? If you want it so bad, you'd better take it then."

nsfw under the cut per usual

-

Gojo Satoru is the Strongest.

This is a sometimes annoying, sometimes relieving, always indisputable fact, one which he never tires of reminding you. Usually when he says it, it's in reference to curses or cursed energy. On occasion, he's referencing a drunken arm-wrestling competition or a punching-bag-machine you stumbled across in a bar that he couldn't resist winning just for the hell of it, he's an asshole like that.

When you're the girlfriend of the Strongest, it's easy to feel lesser than. Sharing a bed and a goodnight kiss every night with the closest human equivalent to a god can be taxing on the insecure little part of your brain.

Satoru does what he can to alleviate the toll his teasing and status take on you, from showering you with compliments to being as much of a sweetheart as he is a menace (and that's saying something). But when you're behind the closed doors of your bedroom, spread out before him and panting, Satoru loves to remind just how unequal the playing ground you're both on is.

"So messy," Satoru hums, dragging two long fingers through the slick folds between your legs. He loves having you like this, bare before him with your legs spread while he stays fully clothed, chastising you.

"Satoru," you beg, canting your hips up towards him, seeking the touch that he's suddenly become so stingy with.

"Watch it," Satoru snaps, eyes narrowing behind his sunglasses, "thought you were going to be good, what happened to that?"

"I-I'm tryin'," you whimper, curling in on yourself in the face of his disdain. Satoru loves when you misbehave, you know that realistically, but here, in the heat of the moment, the threat of his ever-creative punishments has you squirming.

"Could have fooled me," Satoru says with a disappointed tut, pulling you to your feet and sitting on the edge of the bed. You stand between his legs, watching him curiously, until he pats his thigh, a criminally smooth smile gracing his face.

"Sit?" You go to sit across his legs, but Satoru all but shoves you back to your feet, frowning.

"Sit," Satoru says with a note of implication, gesturing to his muscled thigh again. You catch his meaning, frowning.

"But your pants-"

"But nothing. If you want it so bad, you'd better take it while you have the chance. You know how moody I can be," Satoru lowers his glasses to smirk at you, menacing and cruel.

You straddle his thigh without another thought, the threat behind his words ringing in your ear. The friction from the rough fabric of his slacks is an instant relief against your pulsing core; you shudder as soon as your hot, sticky cunt makes contact with the cool cloth. You tentatively roll your hips once, twice, a broken moan falling out of you.

"There you go," Satoru says, saccharinely sweet, "that better?"

"A- a little," you admit, eyes rolling back in your head as you begin to grind down onto him harder, already having been teased to the point of breaking.

It's shameful, really, how wantonly you moan for him, how quickly you manage to stain his pants, how harshly your fingernails are digging into his shoulders. Satoru watches you, the faintest hint of amusement on his face, and if you were just a tad less fucked out, you would consider smacking him.

But not now, no. Not when you're so close to the release you've been aching for for the last hour, not when your thighs are beginning to shake with the effort of getting yourself off, not when Satoru lands a harsh hand on your hip, dragging you against him harder.

"Sa-Satoru!" you gasp, choking on the syllables of his name, "please, please-"

"So desperate for it, aren't you?" Satoru chuckles, pinching your cheek. "I've barely even touched you pet, how are you this needy already?"

"P-please, I just- so close," you whine, recognizing all too well the chiding tone, the easy cockiness that suits him so well. He's already made himself busy edging you all night, surely he won't-

"Aw," Satoru pouts at your cry of frustration, "something wrong?"

You fruitlessly roll your hips against the cold, unyielding barrier of Satoru's infinity, unreal and unsatisfying beneath your needy cunt. You glare at him through hooded eyes, chest still heaving.

"You're so-"

"Mean? Is that really what you want to call me right now?" The amused sparkle behind Satoru's glasses glimmers out into a look of cold cruelty.

"No, I-"

"Think I'm not going to make you cum?" Satoru tosses you off onto your back, hovering over you with something dangerous and dark playing on his face. "What, are you going to tell me I can't play with my little pet anymore? Can't take it?"

"No," you feel your bottom lip tremble.

"Am I too much for you? If you can't take my games, baby, I don't know how you're going to take everything else I want to give you."

"No, I can- I can take it," you grab at his shirt desperately, eyes shining, "I need it- please, Satoru."

"Sh sh sh," Satoru shushes you, pinching at your cheek, "pathetic little thing, aren't you? So needy for me."

"Mhm," you hum, canting your hips up towards the thigh he slots between your legs, "I just need you, please, Satoru-"

"That's right," Satoru smiles down at you, a tender thumb rubbing over your lips, "just me, right? I'm the only one that can get you this fucked out."

"Just you," you whimper pitifully, trying to roll your hips up into him to no avail.

"That's what I like to hear," Satoru hisses, the first break in his composure all night, "all for me."

[innytoes]

I read prompt 51 in Reggie’s voice, so please - with whoever else you think!

- @anotherfantom

Set in the Cat!Reggie and Sugar Salmon!Daddy verse.

Reggie was lounging on Caleb's bed, waiting for the guy to get out of the shower. He kind of regretted not joining him, but he'd still been in Cat Mode when Caleb got home, curled up in the middle of the bed in the perfect pool of sunlight, and he'd been too cozy to move.

It wasn't like he lived here, or anything. It just wasn't like he didn't live here, either. Caleb had installed a magical cat flap that only let him in, and he had his own drawers in Caleb's drawer, with fancy outfits Caleb had gotten him, and a toothbrush in the bathroom, and all his cat stuff around the house. But he was free to come and go as he pleased.

He just happened to like to be here at times he knew Caleb would get home. Especially if he was going to be naked. So sue him. His boyfriend was hot.

He perked up when he heard the water shut off, changing back to human so he could fully enjoy the view. He was still in the cozy patch of sunlight, except it only covered part of his back. The light on bare skin was different than on his fur, but also nice. He was just wearing some cute cotton shorts Caleb had gotten him as he lazed on his stomach, kicking his feet in delight when Caleb came out of the shower, still toweling off his hair.

"Hello, Kitten," he said, leaning over to kiss Reggie.

"Hi," Reggie said, a little breathless after the kiss, and the view. "How was your day?"

"Oh, simply awful," Caleb said, as he rooted around his drawers for some comfortable silk pants. Reggie enjoyed the view while it lasted, though Caleb in silk was also nice. "The Council is all up in a tiff because apparently the pixies that have roosted in my Club are 'illegal' and 'not supposed to be there'."

"You don't mind them?" Reggie asked, making grabby hands at Caleb until he sat back down on the bed. Okay, so he only did it to put on his socks, but he was still shirtless. Jackpot. Reggie draped himself over the man's back, enjoying his warm, clean skin against his own. Caleb happily leaned back.

"No, if you give them something to do they're actually quite helpful. Also they've been ah, deterring staff who keeps trying to use my props room as a make-out spot, which is ever so helpful."

"So how are you going to gaslight gatekeep girlboss your way out of this?" Reggie asked. From Caleb's rants - he did them less when Reggie was human, but he loved grumbling about it when Reggie was a cat, especially when they hadn't yet officially established Reggie could be human - the Hollywood Wizard Council were pretty much sticklers for the rules they themselves made up.

"How am I what?" Caleb asked, turning to him. He looked adorably confused, which was a new expression on him. Reggie kissed his nose, and he wrinkled it even more adorably. And handsomely.

"It's a thing," he shrugged. "An internet thing."

Caleb turned to kiss him properly. "It's a good thing you make me feel so young, darling, because you just made me feel very, very old."

"Oh, I'll make you feel young, alright," Reggie grinned.

The silk pants came off again, and they had a very, very nice evening. Later, when Reggie was curled up on Caleb's chest, feeling like he'd be purring if he was in Cat Mode, he looked up. "Okay but how are you going to get the Council off your back about the pixies?"

Caleb looked down. "Oh. I drew up a contract and had them sign it. They're now officially employees of the Hollywood Ghost Club, paid in room and board and one shiny button a month. They negotiated hard for that last one."

"You do have a lot of nice and shiny buttons," Reggie mused.

"Is that girlboss gamer gatelight of me?" Caleb asked, and Reggie laughed so hard he accidentally turned back into a cat.

[zealouscanonindeer]

Little love

Post OH. Fluffy Angst. I never could resist a happy ending.

Synopsis: Ethan and Aspen's tiff affects a third individual more than they could ever fathom.

*******

Last night had been absolutely crazy. Ethan was on a day shift which ended up becoming a night shift only because Bloom suddenly decided to start a new policy and the administration board was in splits so now Ethan had to find middle ground with all of them never once losing sight of his patients. So no matter how much the 2 and a half year old human, pressed against my chest wailed for her daddy, it was not to be.

"Nooo, I. Want. Daddy. "

"I know, baby. "

I only sighed, knowing there was nothing I could do to quench Jade's crying fit, the only person who could was too far away to provide comfort.

Her hazel eyes were overflowing with tears, her rosy cheeks flushed, tiny hiccups alternating between her sobs. Feeling absolutely helpless, I simply held her, rubbing her back comfortingly as she continued.

After almost half an hour, which felt like eternity, she finally tired herself out and snuggled into me on the king sized bed in our room. Her tiny whimpers subsided, as she breathing slowly calmed and steadied itself, tiny snores surfaced as the remnants of her tears stained her cheeks, running down her jaw and neck. I quickly wiped them out with my thumb, heart breaking at the sight of my daughter. I closed my eyes, exhaustion catching up with me.

I woke with a headache and ringing in my ears to the sound of the bell , Jade was still pressed against me but the 6'2 figure keeping the sheets warm was still amiss. I slowly pulled away from Jade's grip and wandered to the front door.

"Yes? " I spoke into the intercom.

"Sweetheart, it's me, It seems I've forgotten my keys. "

"Come on up, E. " I said, letting him in.

Head still pounding, I sat on the couch, curling my legs under me as I waited for Ethan to join me. The door opened very slowly as he walked in, noticing me on the couch, he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Sorry I woke you, I apparently had the keys, just couldn't find it." He placed them in the bowl by the door, walking towards me.

"The fuck, Ethan! Ugh. " My outburst startled both him and myself but the slowly rising pounding of my head and the immense exhaustion was enough to turn me into a spiteful bitch. I didn't even realise the tears now flowing down my face.

"Your daughter just cried herself to sleep cause she wanted her cuddles from daddy who wasn't here cause he was stuck in some stupid meeting with the administration board. Ethan it's been 4 years now, you told me you wanted to give this position up, wanted more time with your family. I can't do this on my own, not with another one on the way, I need you. Please. " My voice broke as the words left me, practically begging and I stumbled onto the sofa in the crying mess.

Ethan just stood frozen, unable to find his voice, the silence only filled by my sniffles as I gathered myself.

"You're..? "

"Yes, 5 weeks, you haven't been around to notice the sickness or anything much less find a moment to ourselves so I could tell you. This is not how I wanted it to go. "

"You know we are finding a replacement, it's harder than I thought.. I can't just leave.. "

"Yes you can. You've done it before. " I slightly winced at my impulsive words. That was unnecessary, dredging up the past only brought back the painful memories.

Ethan seemed to think so too, cause his azure eyes only glared at me, not with anger but with something worse..hurt. I wasn't gonna back down, the words were out anyway.

"I'll take the guest room. " I only nodded at his suggestion and waited until he gathered his stuff from our room and walked out, closing the guest room door behind him with a resounding thud.

I made my way back to the bed, where Jade sat up, her eyes blurry with sleep, widening with fear and confusion at the commotion. She had noticed daddy enter the room, waiting for him to cuddle her and give her assuring kisses, instead he had picked up his pyjamas and toothbrush and walked out,like she didn't even exist. She held her arms out but I was too spent to pick her up, I only gathered the covers, pulling them over us as she slowly lowered herself onto the bed next to me, closing her scared eyes.

**********

The next morning, I woke up feeling the light hit my face, waking up before me, usually Ethan would draw the blinds in. I groaned, almost calling out for him when I felt a tiny squirm beside me, consciousness and last night slowly coming back to me.

Groggily, I sat up, Jade was asleep on her stomach, her face pressed against the mattress, her slightly parted mouth causing her drool to stain the sheets.

"Sicko." I snickered, completely enamoured. I quickly kissed her temple before throwing the covers off my legs and making my way to the kitchen. I halted by my Ethan's door, the primal urge to check in on him taking over me as I peered into the guest room, taking in my husbands snoring form, sprawled over the smaller bed, his feet hanging off the edge. I smiled involuntarily at the sight, slowly closing the door.

"That's your daddy. He sleeps like a log. " I gently whispered, cradling my stomach. "He loves you so much."

I made my way to the fridge, pouring myself some orange juice, before settling on the couch, donning my glasses to read the AMC Medical Monthly.

Tiny feet against the tiles pulled by attention away as I looked up to see Jade waddle, monkey plushie in hand towards me. I held my arms out to her and she quickly scrambled up my lap, leaning her entire weight against me, settling against my chest. We stayed like that in silence, I gently rocked us back and forth.

"Mama? " She mumbled against me.

"Yes, doll? "

She sat up to look me in the eye, her gaze fille with emotions. concern etched in them, her tiny brow which mimicked Ethan's furrowed as I gently ran my hand over it to relax her.

"Tell me you love me. "

"What? Oh doll, of course. I love you a million percent. I'll always love you, forever and always. Never doubt that, not once. So does daddy ,I promise."

" He didn't give me goodnight cuddles when he came. He was real mad. And so were you, you said stupid." She looked down, her fingers fidgeting with my nightgown. She sounded lost, and it was my fault completely.

I waited for her to continue, her next words sending my heart into splinters.

"Why don't you love daddy anymore? "

" I love him , this big. " I stretched my arms out as far as I could, making a silly face causing her to giggle.

" I'll always love your daddy, always. Because he gave me the best gift there ever was. "

"Was it like my new blocks ? " Her eyes widening in excitement at the thought of the secret gift.

"No, doll. It's you. You're the best thing ever in my life and being your Mama is the most amazing thing that could have happened to me. And you know why it happened? "

"Why? "

"Because of daddy, he's the greatest husband and father but above all he's a good man and I'll never ever stop loving him. "

"He loves you too, dis big. " She leaned back, stretching her arms just like I did.

"Let's say good morning, yeah? " She nodded enthusiastically, her hair falling over her face and eyes. She quickly brushed them away, running over to the guest room, turning to me when she reached the door, too little to reach the handle. I opened it for her as she pushed herself onto the bed with difficulty.

Ethan was still asleep on his side, arms below the pillow and the comforter pushed down to his waist, his legs too long to fit were left bare. He lightly snored, making me realize how tired he'd been.

The love I felt for the man before me flowed through every inch of my body, hell it even resided in me. Jade made her way to him, steadying herself to stand using his back as support.

His snoring stopped as her hands clutched onto his back, one arm moving from under the pillow to Jade's standing form, gently flipping her over his back to his chest, causing a fit of giggles to leave her. Now she rested against his chest, looking into his eyes, her tiny arms caressing his bearded jaw as he smiled, taking one of her arms in his hand and pressing his lips to her palm before repeating the same with the other.

"Morning, daddy." She sat up and he followed suit.

"Morning, Jadie girl."

Her hands flew to his neck as she rested her head against his shoulder, looking sideways at me, smiling. I smiled back at her before moving my gaze to Ethan, only to find the stormy ocean already staring back at me.

"We need to talk. " I mouthed. He only nodded.

"Baby, you forgot monkey outside. " Jade mouth twisted into a O as she ran out to her beloved plushie.

"That's the best you could come up with? "

"I didn't see you try. " Before he could retort I walked over, adjusting myself in his lap, pushing my finger against his lips.

"Ethan, what I said last night was completely out of order and I'm so sorry. I have forgiven you and I meant it, I don't want you to think otherwise, not for a second."

He kissed my finger, grabbing my wrist with his large hand to pull it away. I replaced it with my lips, kissing him deeply as he held on to my shoulder. He broke away for air, resting his forehead against mine.

"Thank you. "

I continued, recounting my earlier conversation with Jade, his face falling as I finished my narration.

" I never want her to see her parents at war. I've seen enough of that with Louise to know what it does to a child. I've also felt like shit when she ignored me after an argument with Dad, like I wasn't worth comforting or even taken into consideration. I'll never want her to feel that. "

"Agreed."

" I found him Mommy!! " Jade runs in, her face scrunched as she gets onto the bed, trying to push me off Ethan's lap.

"I was sitting here, Mama. You sit there. " She pointed to the bed.

Ethan chuckled loudly as I almost felt jealous, not wanting to give up my husbands lap to this adorable human.

"You heard her. " Ethan reminded me, gently pushing me off his lap.

"Are you seriously pushing me off? " I scoffed, suddenly offended.

Jade was already nestled against him, looking up at him with so much adoration in her eyes I couldn't stay mad.

" I'm sorry sweetheart I didn't hug you last night. It just means you get all the more snuggles now. " His hands tickled her sides before he began blowing raspberries on her stomach, peals of laughter escaping from her.

"I love you both so much, Aspie. "

"Three of us. " I quickly corrected.

"Ah yes. " He smirked. "We need to have quite the celebration. Don't you agree, Rookie? "

"I may have a few things that come to mind. " I giggled, leaning in to capture his lips once more.

*********

A special thanks to @jamespotterthefirst @potionsprefect @perriewinklenerdie @rookie-ramsey @liaromancewriter @takemyopenheart @cariantha @jerzwriter @genevievemd @heauxplesslydevoted for inspiring me to write because of their amazing fics. I can never get enough of your writing. 😍

@choicesficwriterscreations

********

I'm thinking of starting a tag list. Let me know if you want to be added. That's it.

[fanficwriter284]

Can you do one where Glen and Glenda argue and Chucky and Tiffany take them one a fun trip where Glen and Glenda get along in the end?

SO SORRY IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO ANSWER THIS! But yeah of course! Been dealing with some personal things! But I'm free! So yeah sure! The twins are gonna be about 5/6 at this point because 5 to 6 year olds are literally a different breed of human. I went out to a social event the other day one of these little crack heads threw a ninja star at me and got mad at me for being hit....So...yeah...hah anyways on to the fic. A little short and sweet one since I really need to get back into writing

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It was a Saturday afternoon, with summer at its peak. The air humid, thermostats all cracked to 60 degrees Fahrenheit, and families out on vacation, but the Rays. Chucky sat a can of Canada Dry clutched in his hand, watching his two children sitting on the floor both clutching the tv remote. Tiffany carrying a basket of fresh laundry peaked over watching the scene unfold with a curious brow. 

“GIVE IT GLEN!”

“NO IT’S MY TURN TO PICK WHAT WE WATCH”

Tiffany nudged her husband to intervene only for him to shrug off their children's quarrel continuing to watch. 

“Ain't nothing good on tv anyways. Besides at this rate, they’ll be in bed by 7 hell maybe 6” he spoke gesturing to the two 5-year-olds.

“And maybe” he smirked grabbing at her thigh “we can have a little fun” 

Tiffany pushed his hand away, setting the laundry aside.

 “Kid’s enough with the fighting,” she said snatching the remote, “if you two can’t get along then no Tv for either of you”

Glenda pouted, crawling into Chucky’s lap seeking solace in his embrace, while Glen’s lip began to quiver, still reaching for the remote. The sight struck Tiffany’s heart feeling a slight ache seeing them, however, their pleading looks weren’t enough to regain their tv privileges.

“Hey, how about we go do something fun. The family pools open, why don’t we head over?”

The twins smiled wide, their little eyes widening with glee to where you could see the twinkle of blissful innocence. They scurried upstairs heading to grab their bathing suits before their dad could get a word in. 

“Great Tiff. Now I gotta be social” groaning while slicking a hand through his summer grease-laced locks. 

“Oh come on! It’ll be fun!” she insisted grabbing at his leg, “and if you behave and the kids have fun” she smirked leaning closer, “then tonight we can too”

….

The family sat in the car driving their way to the local pool, the AC turned all the way up leaving a loud rifting sound to clash against their ear drums. The twins sat in their car seats watching the trees and people they passed by Glen counting every single person and Glenda counting road kills. 

“POSSUM!”

“Do you have to shout out every dead thing you see?” Glen frowned clearly unamused by Glenda's outburst.

“It’s better than counting something that's boring” 

“It’s not boring”

“Is too”

“Is not”

“Enough or Imma turn the damn car around” Chucky quipped his grip tightening around the steering wheel. The twins silently obeyed hushing themselves and turned to silent counts.

“Okay it should be on your right Sweetface” Tiffany motioned pointing to the next turn. 

“Yeah yeah I see it”

The family quickly grabbed their gear and made their way over, all pleased that today the pool was vacant. Especially Chucky who was never a fan of social environment, his mood perking up as he took notice of the solitude. 

“Ya know that might not be so bad” he murmured

“See I told you” Tiffany grinned, nudging him slightly. 

“I said might”

Tiffany playfully smacked his side getting a little chuckled out of the redhead. Chucky wrapped his arm around her giving a slight loving squeeze peering over at his kids, feeling a smile spread across his lips. 

“They are pretty cute when they’re not fighting or trying ta kill each other”

The blonde gave a sly grin, intertwining her fingers with his, “yeah they are, aren’t they” 

While their parents watched, the twins played a game of volleyball with an oversized beach ball in the pool, both slashing around, trying to keep the ball above the water.

“Nice save Glen!” Glenda shouted, preparing to smack the incoming ball.

“THANKS! Ya nearly had me there!”

As the afternoon sun began its descent, casting a warm golden glow over the scene, Chucky leaned over to his wife, "Looks like it's been a good day."

Tiffany nodded, squeezing his hand gently. "The best."

[marvelmaniac715]

This is part four of my au where Chucky decides to transfer into a human body. In this part, Glen and Glenda come out as non-binary. I myself am cisgender, and I don’t mean to offend anyone, if I get anything wrong please let me know so I can edit it, but I promise to try my best to write this as accurately as possible.

————————————————————

Glen and Glenda were finally home on break from boarding school! Chucky had been against sending them away from the very start, but one day Glen had found a box of old Enid Blyton books and became fixated on the concept of boarding schools. Glenda seemed excited too and Tiff eventually wore him down. The twins would only be home for a couple of weeks, and he’d written up an entire plan of stuff to do in that time.

That excitement was slightly ruined by the grim looking faces his children wore when he went to meet them at the airport. He used to kill people, and this was a ‘serious confession’ face. Were his children about to admit that they’d killed a man? If so, he was down for it, it had been ages since he’d buried a body.

It was a mostly silent drive to the house, any conversation was stilted and awkward. Whatever was going on (and Chucky knew his children very well, so there was definitely something going on) they weren’t telling. They requested that they all sit down together as a family for what they called an ‘important discussion’. The suspense was killing him, why wouldn’t they just come out with it and admit who they’d killed already?

When they were all sat down, awkward silence ensued. Twenty minutes passed as the clock ticked ominously in the background. Each second seemed to last forever, and Chucky was anxious to find out what was going on.

Eventually, he just got up to his feet and asked what he felt was the obvious question.

“Alright, who did ya kill?”

The twins looked at each other, taken aback but not exactly surprised. Their father had always been the type of guy to respond to any problem with “give me a name, a location and an hour” instead of advising forgiveness. But the idea that they’d killed somebody was just… absurd. It was such a strange concept that it made the both of them laugh out loud. When their laughter had subsided, Glen spoke.

“We didn’t kill anyone Dad, but we’ve realised something important whilst we were away, and we want you guys to know about it, because we both love you so much, and we feel confident and ready enough to share.”

Their mother was the next one to speak, she hadn’t known what to make of all of this, but this was clearly something important.

“What is it, sweet faces? Glenda, are you pregnant? Or- Glen, did you get someone pregnant? Oh my god, am I a grandmother already?”

Glen and Glenda glanced at each other before rolling their eyes fondly. It was just like their Mom to overreact like this, it was one of those little characteristics that made her, well, her. Glen stared imploringly at Glenda, silently begging them to take over, because they’d run out of words to say. Thankfully, Glenda obliged with a slightly nervous smile.

“Mom, Dad, Glen and I, well, we’re both non-binary.”

You could have heard a pin drop. The twins were nervous, and both Chucky and Tiffany were processing what they’d just learnt. Finally, Chucky broke the silence with a confused question.

“So what’s that mean?”

Tiffany whacked him in the back of the head and glared at him angrily.

“Oh Chucky, how can you be so dense? Non-binary means that our children don’t have a binary gender, Glenda isn’t female and Glen isn’t male. Is that right sweet faces? I’m still trying to get caught up, you know how I get stuck in the past.”

Glen nodded, pleasantly surprised that their Mom had understood so quickly.

“Yeah, that’s right.”

Tiffany ran forward to embrace her children, crying a little with joy.

“Oh my babies, I’m so proud of you both for feeling so comfortable to share something so important with us! Now, just to check, is there anything that your father and I can do to support you? I assume that both of your pronouns are they/them, but are there different names you’d like us to call you by, or do you want to go shopping for different clothes?”

Glenda grinned at their mother and shook their head.

“No, we’re happy with our names, we think we both suit them pretty well, but it would be nice to be referred to by the right pronouns, thank you.”

Chucky was still silent at the other end of the room, just staring at them in thought. Glen walked up to their father and, gathering all of their courage, they asked the question they’d been afraid to ask all week.

“Dad… how are you taking all this? Do you… not love us anymore?”

Glen and Glenda had never thought their father was homophobic or anything like that, but he seemed quite… set in his ways, it was like he hadn’t progressed past the 80s, mentally at least. But they both loved their Dad, so they desperately hoped he’d accept them both now that he knew that he didn’t have a son and a daughter, but two non-binary children.

He didn’t speak for a moment, but he beckoned Glenda over. Once Glenda was standing next to Glen, Chucky pulled both of his children into a tight hug, tighter than any hug either of them had ever received before.

“Glen, son-sorry, sorry, kid, I swear that’s the last time that’ll happen I’ll do better I promise-I love you both no matter what. You’re my kids, and I’m your Dad. I said I’d love you no matter why you did and it would be pretty fuckin’ hypocritical of me to disown you or something stupid like that just because of your gender identities. Hell, if you actually did kill somebody, I was gonna show you some good spots to hide the body, I know twelve good ones in this state alone.”

The twins laughed, happy to see that things were back to normal so quickly. They weren’t sure what to expect considering their parents were so… explosive, but it was great to see that their parents had their backs no matter what. But of course, their Dad had to ruin the moment.

“So just to clarify, you didn’t kill anybody?”

[cto10121]

Twilight Meta Review—Chapter 3-4

In which Edward saves Bella from the van and reveals himself some more, Bella demands an explanation and Edward refuses it. They don’t speak for a month until Edward gets the jellies from Mike Newton, of all people, and decides f*ck it, Imma just fuck around and find out. Instalove, clearly. Spoilers, of course.

Chapter 3: Love At First Fight

I threw down a quick bowl of cereal and some orange juice from the carton. I felt excited to go to school, and that scared me. I knew it wasn’t the stimulating learning environment I was anticipating, or seeing my new set of friends. If I was being honest with myself, I knew I was eager to get to school because I would see Edward Cullen. And that was very, very stupid. (p. 54)

Bella is so self-aware it’s not even funny. It’s actually kind of great. Remind me again why she is somehow an awful character? In any case, she does feel embarrassed at her obvious infatuation.

I was well aware that my league and his league were spheres that did not touch.

The class-boundaries theme begins its smooth cha-cha slide into consciousness, I see. Lion and the lamb, May-December romance. And of course, Bella is obviously working class white to Edward’s posh white. Classic.

I was sure I looked the same as I had in Phoenix. Maybe it was just that the boys back home had watched me pass slowly through all the awkward phases of adolescence and still thought of me that way. Perhaps it was because I was a novelty here, where novelties were few and far between. Possibly my crippling clumsiness was seen as endearing rather than pathetic, casting me as the damsel in distress. (p. 55)

I’m going for novelty. Small town life is very much Like That. Bella is obviously conventionally attractive and sweet and that’s enough for most guys. In any case, I like how Bella is just so unimpressed and even annoyed at all the attention. She doesn’t fawn over just any guy who pays her attention, which is of course the point. Even Mike annoys her the moment he shows any romantic interest in her. All throughout the book she tries to set him up with Jessica instead.

There were thin chains crisscrossed in diamond shapes around them. Charlie had gotten up who knows how early to put snow chains on my truck. My throat felt suddenly tight. I wasn’t used to being taken care of, and Charlie’s unspoken concern caught me by surprise. (p. 55)

I wish they had kept this in the movie instead of the staring contest between Edward and Bella, if only because Charlie is just…truly lovely. And once again, there is Bella’s neglect by her mother.

Just before I heard the shattering crunch of the van folding around the truck bed, something hit me, hard, but not from the direction I was expecting. (p. 56)

This whole van sequence is written a little confusingly, but it give some ambiguity as to exactly what happened. In the movie, it’s just…Edward leaps and stops the van, they stare at each other and he just…leaps out. Instead of an almost ghost-like Edward setting up a plausible scene and Bella very confusingly registering everything.

“Bella, I was standing with you, and I pulled you out of the way.” He unleashed the full, devastating power of his eyes on me, as if trying to communicate something crucial.

“No.” I set my jaw.

Bella is so spineless, isn’t she? Just look at the way she just accepts her crush’s lies without argument. The anti hate dumb is really intense in this one. I’m blaming the movie writing on this.

The gold in his eyes blazed. “Please, Bella.”

“Why?” I demanded.

“Trust me,” he pleaded, his soft voice overwhelming.

I could hear the sirens now. “Will you promise to explain everything to me later?”

“Fine,” he snapped, abruptly exasperated.

“Fine,” I repeated angrily.

Their first lovers’ tiff Their first argument is perhaps the only true one. Of course Edward isn’t going to reveal his vampirism to a human—it isn’t even his secret to tell. He is risking *Alan Rickman voice* the exposure of their world. But Bella has seen too much, alas, and notices too much. Beforehand she had noticed the change in Edward’s eye color and his strength. This is yet another piece in the mystery puzzle, which the movie adaptation just simply yeets out the window.

In any case, at the hospital Bella asks Edward directly for his promised explanation. It goes about as well as you’d think.

“I saved your life—I don’t owe you anything.”

I flinched back from the resentment in his voice. “You promised.”

“Bella, you hit your head, you don’t know what you are talking about.” His tone was cutting.

My temper flared now, and I glared defiantly at him. “There is nothing wrong with my head.”

This is so much better and more interesting than the movie version it hurts. Bella is like a dog with a bone here and Edward is somehow unable to convince her of his lies. Hell, he almost doesn’t even try. Since we are shown that he is usually good at persuasion, it shows that his weak spot is Bella.

I’m guessing the film adaptation didn’t like Edward’s assholery here and so toned it way down, but his anger 1) fits his character and 2) is definitely not because of Bella. It’s all directed at himself, for his weakness in exposing himself and his family to danger—he admits it explicitly later on in the book. It’s also confirmed in Midnight Sun. Bella doesn’t know all this baggage, though, but she still picks up a very distorted version of the truth—that he regrets saving her.

We scowled at each other in silence. […] I was so angry, it took me a few minutes until I could move. When I could walk, I made my way slowly to the exit at the end of the hallway. (p. 65)

A gentle but firm reminder that Bella has a temper. She internalizes it, however, as women are taught to do. Would have been nice for Stewart to have been directed to show that anger.

That was the first night I dreamed of Edward Cullen.

Nothing like saving your life and behaving like an asshole to stir up the hormones.

Chapter 4: Bella and Edward Don’t Speak For A Month

Yep. A whole month.

The month that followed the accident was uneasy, tense, and, at first, embarrassing. (p. 68)

Bella’s and Edward’s relationship is clearly moving too quickly. One awkward conversation, then a life-saving incident, then a full-on argument in which they don’t speak for a month. Instalove, clearly.

Yes, Bella is hot for him and is already dreaming about him like the simp she is, but that doesn’t mean she is just going to roll over at his say-so. And Edward is still clearly in fervent denial about his fascination with her. That won’t last, of course.

I wondered to myself why no one else had seen him standing so far away, before he was suddenly, impossibly saving my life. With chagrin, I realized the probable cause—no one was as aware of Edward as I always was. No one else watched him the way I did. How pitiful.

Bella knows she is in horny jail and deserves it. Look at her wearing the makeup of clownery with ironic ruefulness. Juliet Capulet somewhere is smiling in knowing recognition. I approve.

Mike, at least, was pleased by the obvious coolness between me and my lab partner. I could see he’d been worried that Edward’s daring rescue might have impressed me, and he was relieved that it seemed to have the opposite effect. (p. 71)

It’s a nice reversal, to be sure. In fact, that incident was definitely a one-step-forward-two-steps-back kind of deal. Meyer is breaking a pretty bad trope-cliché with this one, and she deserves credit for that.

I closed my eyes and pressed my fingers to my temples, trying to push the guilt and sympathy out of my head. […] And Edward was staring at me curiously, that same, familiar edge of frustration even more distinct now in his black eyes.

Edward-senpai noticed her!!!! And all thanks to Mike. Yes, Mike fucking Newton was literally the catalyst for Edward talking to Bella again. It’s Edward’s turn for the clown makeup.

I couldn’t believe the rush of emotion pulsing through me—just because he’d happened to look at me for the first time in a half-dozen weeks. I couldn’t allow him this level of influence over me. It was pathetic. More than pathetic, it was unhealthy. (p. 74)

Bella is so smart she anticipated her own anti hate dumb. What clairvoyance. Move over, Alice.

“I’m sorry.” He sounded sincere. “I’m being very rude, I know. But it’s better this way, really.”

I opened my eyes. His face was very serious.

“I don’t know what you mean,” I said, my voice guarded.

“It’s better if we’re not friends,” he explained. “Trust me.”

At least Edward apologized. That’s something. (Did he in the movie adaptation? I don’t remember). But of course Bella believes that Edward is regretting saving her, which of course angers him. And thus Fight #2.

I mean to sweep dramatically out of the room, but of course I caught the toe of my boot on the doorjamb and dropped my books. I stood there for a moment, thinking about leaving them. Then I sighed and bent to pick them up. He was there; he’d already stacked them into a pile. He handed them to me, his face hard.

“Thank you,” I said icily.

His eyes narrowed.

“You’re welcome,” he retorted.

Now KISS.

(Bonus: A Troll!Edward moment I love: Letting Tyler Crowley ask Bella to the prom by blocking Bella’s way.

In his rearview mirror, Edward’s eyes were on me. He was unquestionably shaking with laughter, as if he’d heard every word Tyler had said. My foot itched toward the gas pedal…one little bump wouldn’t hurt any of them, just the glossy silver paint job. I revved the engine.

Why couldn’t we have this in the movie adaptation instead of the horrible comic relief? Bella and Edward can be really hilarious together if you just let their personalities shine. Okay, now back to the show.)

“Bella, it’s not my fault if you are exceptionally unobservant.” His voice was quiet as usual—velvet, muted.

Ooh, below the belt. And so untrue it’s clownish. But notice that he said if—also, he may still be trying to keep to his I-was-right-next-to-you fib. But Edward is in a lighter mood today and he has just asked Bella if she would like a ride to Seattle. Like the cuttease he is.

“It would be more…prudent for you not to be my friend,” he explained. “But I’m tired of trying to stay away from you, Bella.”

His eyes were gloriously intense as he uttered that last sentence, his voice smoldering. I couldn’t remember how to breathe. (p. 84)

Really? In front of my salad?

[latina94]

Mated to my enemy

Chapter 4: Alic

Hey, I hear Collin say as he comes around the corner with Emory's friend holding hands he smiles hey Alic I found my mate he says that's great congratulations I say Happy for my friend I can feel Em's eyes on me, and goddess all I wanna do is turn around and hold her in my arms but I can't she would not be strong enough to be my mate, she is strong, smart and beautiful says my wolf she's not for us Asher we need a luna who can take on a role of a strong luna, not someone who is weak, or small. How do you know she's not any of that I can sense it she's more than that NO I say and push him back in my mind I have to think of my back all you have to do is find your mate now says Collin I sigh ya about that I've chosen to take Tiff as my mate and luna I hear her fall before I see it Emory I hear Ashly scream when she runs to her friend collin goes behind her to help her sit up Em what's wrong they ask she is breathing heavily she looks up at me, do it she says WHAT? I ask her as her brother and friend help her up she stands up holds her head up high and looks dead at me with tears in her eyes, she's going to reject us I feel her wolf she is not happy about this but won't stop her human Alic don't let her do this I want my mate he growls. She won't do it I say I can see she wants me, Emory Clark daughter of beta Jack Clark of Cloud Moon Pack reject you Alic Anderson soon to be ALPHA of Cloud Moon Pack as my mate I feel a pain in my chest like someone ripped my heart out I fall to my knees as I hear my wolf whine and howl in my head from her rejection, my breathing is heavy I'm having a hard time catching my breath I try to take in a breath I look up to see Emory holding her chest but she's not crying, she holds her head up she walks to me as I try to stand when you mark that bitch of she wolf she says with a growl I see her eyes change color to a purple holy shit I exhale she kneels in front me. Asher come forward before I even have a chance to stop him I feel my wolf come forward

Asher

Oh goddess your eyes are beautiful my mate I am no longer your mate she says I let Em reject you both because I can smell that she-wolf all over him she said, I tried to stop him I breathed out heavily but it didn't work did it she asks I nod my head I will let you know MY EMORY is strong she trains with Ashly and her brother every day she is the top worrier in the pack but she didn't want anyone to know til she finishes school we are strong, and smart and can take on anything but that's all I will say to you I whimper and put my head down I see her stand up what's your name I breathe out my name is River.

Alic: I finally push my wolf back he's weak right now and won't fight me don't ever take over my body without asking me to say to him " Don't worry HUMAN!! I WILL NEVER EVER DO IT AGAIN what does that mean but he goes to the back of my mind and shuts me out Em I hear Collin say as I finally stand up she turns to him your eyes are amazing I hear her giggle it's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard that because I'm not Em not right now she let me come forward her heart is breaking not because that's when she turns to me HELLO ALPHA her calling me that feels so wrong Emory i.. no I'm not her heart is breaking because she wanted to give you a chance she wanted to like you more then she did I nod my head.

The name is River by the way she says I am Emorys wolf your eyes I exhale there a purple yes they would be wouldn't they see alpha I'm more than a normal wolf and if you would have gave me a chance gave my Emory a chance you would have seen that now I will ask you this if you have any respect for this family accept are rejection and please wait to mate that thing you will call your luna til you mark her because if you mate her before then we will feel the pain and you will not like what I have to do to protect my human.

What do you mean asks her brother she doesn't even turn around I will let Em come back and you will accept her rejection I see her eyes close and when they open back up they are silver-looking I exhale holding my chest still, do it she says I Alic Anderson soon to be ALPHA of Cloud Moon Pack accept your rejection Emory Clark daughter of beta Jack Clark of Cloud Moon Pack she doubles over Em I hear collin say before I see him go to her she puts her hand up.

[ayylovley]

Can I please have a headcanon for Billy Lenz, Tiffany Valentine (both),Charles Lee Ray (human and doll), Jason Vorhees, Micheal Myers, Jennifer Check, Martin Mathias, Billy Loomis, Stu Macher, Bubba Sawyer and Brahms Heelshire with a tomboy fem S/O with short hair and wears vintage suits, newsboy hats, vintage casual clothes and sometimes steals the characters clothes but she still wears lipgloss,lipbalm and lipstick? Please tell me if that is to much

It’s totally not and yess!💜 Love ur style

Billy Lenz

Sfw

Billy adores your style!

Would want to play with your short hair and call you a, “Pretty piggy! So pretty.”

When he plays with your hair he wants to cup your face and stare into your eyes while admiring your features.

With your vintage suits, he would gush at cute you are! (And sexy!;))

Sometimes he loves to take your hat off and wear it for himself. He looks just as cute!🥺

Would ask to some of your clothes when you ask to wear his sweater. He looks so sexy in your suits and don’t even get me started on how he thinks you look in his back turtleneck! Sjdjdjfkf

Nsfw

The best part of you wearing these type of clothing, is ripping them off so eagerly wanting to see what you got going on underneath.

Billy has a big uniform fetish. So when you wear your suits he gots all hot and bothered, just you giving him a cute smile while wearing your newsboy hat, he gets boner.

The way you blush when you’re screaming his name as he’s pounding you really gets him going!

At the mention of you wearing his black turtlenecks? Yeah he turns into a fucking animal.

He’d jump on you so fast and you’re gonna leave with scars, scratches, bruises, and bite marks. But very content.

Loves to lick the chapstick and lipstick right off of your lips especially when you’re making out with this feral boi.

Billy would totally make you suck his cock while you’re wearing one of your suits, the way you look up at him with the hat on top of your head, he growls and stares back at you with predatory eyes...

But this man actually isn’t horny all the time! Some days you’ll find yourself relaxing with him, watching movies. But then again, you never know what you’re gonna get with this man...

Human Tiffany Valentine

Sfw

It’s different to way Tiff is into, but she likes it! When you first met she actually thought you were a boy.

But even if you identified as a boy, you were the prettiest to the beautiful blonde.

Would definitely let you borrow some chapstick and lipstick. And this woman has all kinds of flavors!

Adores your hair, but would also have wigs sometimes, the wig turns into a full blown makeover.

But would keep the vintage outfit you have at the moment. Tiffany loves them and would also borrow some blazers, coats, sweaters to see how she would look.

Foxy as hell as always!

If Tiff finds you wearing something of hers, boi get ready for some full time affection and admiration for her!

Would shower you in kisses. “You look so pretty! So perfect! Come on let’s see what else you can try on!”

When you two go on dates, she finds it so hot when you walk in, she’s wearing a revealing dress and you’re walking in with a sexy nice vintage suit! It brings people turning heads every time and she loves it!

Nsfw

Tiffany thinks about ripping your clothes off every day. Surprising she’s very horny a lot.

When you’re doing something as innocent as blushing or winking at the blonde, you’ll find yourself being pushed against the wall.

Whispering praise and a bit of degrading, (only if you’re into that) in your ear.

First things first Tiffany is a switch! She loves when you scream her name so needily, she works her tongue on your clit like Magic!

Has a mommy/mistress kink so you can call her either or. But if you’re not into that also you can just call her by her first name. :p

When Tiffany is submissive, she would purposely moan out your name loudly for people to hear. If you’re a hard dom, leave her crying and screaming and she’s very certain she’s in love. Freaky girl likes it rough...

If you’re more softer, she would go with that too, her sort whimpers and whines are so cute! Always tugs at your short hair when your face is in between her thick soft thighs.

When you’re eating her out she will arch and you can catch a sight of her large chest heaving with sweat dripping in between her breasts it’s so sexy!

Doll Tiffany Valentine

Sfw

In doll form, Tiffany would still compliment and adore your style.

She would actually want to give you a makeover more. You’re like her personal doll to her.

When you’re going out, the adorable doll blonde would want to go with you. You’d pick her up and she’d cling to you so tightly and it’s adorable!

When you randomly place your hat on top of her head, she would look just the cutest!

Tiff loves when you love lipstick stains on her plastic cheeks and forehead. She would do the same to you in return.

Nsfw

Now that she’s a doll she loves being submissive more!

Her favorite position is sitting on your face, feeling your tongue while she’s spread eagle and letting out the most cutest and sexiest moans.

Doll Tiffany would love to return the favor and give you some good oral as well! Her tongue still works amazingly and loves to crawl up your body and leave bite marks.

Love to praise especially when she’s being the sub. “Ohh sweetface, you’re so amazing! I love you so much!”

Human Charles Lee Ray/Chucky

Sfw

First, Charles would call you a boy just to get on your nerves.

Would makes fun of you a little, but actually finds you very cute!

Secretly likes your style, and when you two go out in front of public he also wears nice suits.

Would hide your hat just to piss you off, and you know it’s him but he denies it every time, the jackass!

Would make jokes like, “Hey, don’t you have to go to work and throw newspapers at old people’s houses?”

Smirks smugly when he finds you get so annoyed by him.

When Charles finds you have on a long coat of his, he’d laugh his ass off. “You have your own damn jackets don’t chu?”

Would secretly find you so cute in it...

Nsfw

Charles is surprisingly into taking off your suits and vintage tomboy threads and find a feminine body underneath.

He would compare it to unwrapping a present.

His favorite part is undoing a tie you had on and use it to choke you while pounding you cuz this man has such a choking kink.

If he’s in a good mood, he would tell you how beautiful you are to him and how much he loves you.

Would want a good fuck in public if you’re ok with it. If you are, he loves fucking you as you keep your clothes on.

Favorite position is you on top of him, so cowgirl. He gets a good view of your body and he doesn’t have to do any work.

Doll Charles Lee Ray/Chucky

Sfw

Now that he’s a doll, he would probably be jealous that you’re still human but still compliment you on your outfits.

Secretly loves when you pick him up. Especially when his face is pushed against your chest. He’s a pervert.

Would still sweet talk you if he wanted something. Probably even more now that he’s a doll he would ask for you to take him somewhere. You say no he’ll convince you to say yes eventually.

Cuddles are still limited since he was never a cuddler, but once he knows you’re asleep he will latch onto you like a koala!

The red headed bastard is actually cute when he’s sleeping. (Probably cuz he ain’t talking)

In public he loves watching strangers reactions to a dame holding up such an “ugly” doll. He will cackle about it once you’re alone with him every time.

Nsfw

Doll! Chucky’s cock may be tiny as hell and plastic, but he’ll find ways to make you feel just as good as when he was human.

Would probably be more vocal about how you look hot in your outfits, especially in the suits.

He has a better view of your ass when he’s sitting down so he’d smirk and something perverted would wrap around his orange head.

He also has easier access to your chest. Mentioned earlier when you hold him in public places, don’t be surprised when you’re alone and you find bite marks or feel his mouth on your skin.

His doll tongue and mouth will do wonders for your pussy. Not as long as it used to be but it can still make you squirm and shiver.

He would degrade you pretty harshly, “Oh you like being fucked by a doll?? Fucking freak! Slut!” But I mean he’s good at seduction even as a damn doll so...Kinda not your fault!

Charles Lee Ray as Nica Pierce

(I’m just gonna call him he/him)

Sfw

He’s a woman but a human again! So watching him being all happy and excited about it is actually really adorable.

Charles/Nica would wanna do everything he did as a human again and more.

If anyone wants to talk shit about two women together, he would get so angry and will take care of them afterwards.

He had to deal with people looking at his girl before now he’s gotta deal with people look at him too.

Believe it or not Charles kept those red pumps so sometimes catch him wearing them with his suits and coat when he’s out at night. It’s pretty hot.

Would let you wear his scarfs sometimes, just if you loose em or spill anything on em yours dead. His words not mine.

Nsfw

If he lets you eat him out, he won’t get enough of it. He didn’t know it was gonna feel so good!

Don’t take it from me but, homie is so into it when he’s on his period and he would probably still make you eat him out.

His sex drive cranked up to about 1000 since he can actually fuck as a human again, Y’know?

So be prepared for that shit. Cuz he gets very grumpy and cranky when you say you’re not in the mood but would accept it anyway.

Would be into scissoring and toys. But only can be used on you, like strap ons, vibrators, etc. Strap ons are the only cock he has, it’s not the same but it’ll do.

Nica Pierce

Sfw

Nica fell hard as soon as she saw you! She loves to compliment you about everything.

Compliment her and she will love you forever! She is deeply insecure.

Would find it so cute if you steal some of her clothes to wear, she would want to borrow some of your own, she looks so stylish in them!

She would ask for you to dress, and undress her when she’s getting ready for bed or the day.

If you see her looking at herself in the mirror she’s always thinking poorly of herself. So remind her how gorgeous she is.

If one day you meet Nica’s family but they talk shit, (mainly Barb) She won’t back down just because they’re her family. They need to respect her girlfriend or they leave!😤

Her favorite days is you two cooking together. You both share good laughs and conversation.

Nsfw

Also insecure about her body, so praise her and give it so many kisses, she’ll do the same with big heart eyes.

Give her some time and practice for sex and she’ll get the hang of it! Nica loves when you moan her name, you sound so cute.

Would prefer to be the top more, but would splurge and be the sub some time.

She’s a big cuddler after sex, she’ll wrap around you and enjoy you wrapped around her all the same.

You two would be such a wholesome couple!

Glen Ray

Sfw (no nsfw)

Glen blushes hard but just looking at you. Sweet boy he is!

Gets so nervous when you’re holding hands with him. A smile shot at him and he’s gushing hard.

You’re the prettiest woman to him. And you’re so perfect to him, he’ll remind you of that everyday.

Is a big dork and makes puns and jokes to make you laugh. Especially if you’re having a bad day.

He hates to see you upset so he’ll try everything he can to see that beautiful smile again.

Definitely a romantic! Like his mother, Glen has a thing for light candle dinners, preferably at home.

Any random day he will come home with flowers for you, with a note saying how much he loves you.

Glenda Ray

Sfw (no nsfw)

Glenda is more like her father so unfortunately, no romance at all.

In fact, more making fun of it but she’s doing it out of love! No matter what you’re everything to her.

She finds someone talking shit? Or trying to steal her girl? All hell will break loose!

She has frizzy orange hair and wouldn’t mind if you’re touching it, it’s quite nice. But not too much.

Her pet names for you are kinda like back handed compliments but she reminds you they’re just nicknames. But sometimes give you some nice ones.

Jason Vorhees

Sfw

Jason doesn’t comment on it, he doesn’t talk but there’s ways he comments on things.

But you’re not like any girl he’s seen before, the ones he’s seen are either snobby ‘whores’ or the ‘final girl’ type.

He sees you as neither, you caught his way and made him look with a second glance so that’s definitely a first for him!

If you stole his hockey mask he would be so confused, why would you wanna steal that? It’s dirty and kept on his face for a long time.

But he would be lying if he said he didn’t think you looked cute with it on.

He knew his mother would approve of you! You’re so polite and sweet to him so Pamela would love that.

Nsfw

Jason is not one with sex, but he would be so good at it! His cock is thick and long, nicely curved as well.

Sex with Jason would most likely hurt a bit but when he does he’ll feel horrible and try to be more gentle.

He can get a little carried away however with his groping and manhandling, sometimes he’ll leave red hand prints that’ll last a few days.

He’d prefer if you were on top of him so he wouldn’t hurt you as much. He also loves the view of your body above him

Micheal Myers

Sfw

Also like Jason, Micheal doesn’t comment on it. Then again he doesn’t talk like Jason.

He’s definitely into it however, loves to do your ties for you. Or dress you in general.

His favorite thing about your outfits is the more casual vintage types. Mostly because they’re more easier to dress you in for him

Nsfw

This man has a size kink so he will pick you up and fuck you against the nearest wall if he needs to.

Uses the ties to choke you and keeps intense eye contact.

You look more innocent to him when you where suits and the newsboy hat which is more of a turn on for him.

Also very much info knife play so would use his knife on you even after he has killed some people. He wants to see the blood drip down on your naked body. It drives him nuts.

Jennifer Check

Sfw

Now Jennifer might like it the most out of all of em. But she would make fun of you for it sometimes like Chucky.

Jen would love to do your makeup for you, you look so good in lipstick so she wants to see you in more makeup.

Seeing you in the makeup she put on you while wearing a suit, she’s fallen hard for you.

If you’re shy, Jen is into the shy, vulnerable girl types so you’re basically her type!

Steal anything you want from her honestly, she doesn’t mind. As long as you put everything back where it was.

She would want you to put on a fashion show for her, it would last a few hours not kidding.

Nsfw

Jen is for sure a top! Enjoys you screaming and moaning her name. It inflates her ego like no other.

Would use toys on you but let’s you use them on her as well.

Would love public sex, and she’s always the submissive in these moments to purposely scream out your name.

If you two get caught she’ll reply with, “What? Cant I let the world know how much my sexy girl makes me feel?”

A massive tease, would give steaming lap dances, wear the most revealing clothing and lingerie and shake whatever you were staring at that day.

Also wants to make you cry when you beg, she’d make you watch her pleasure herself with a good view and make you fall to your knees.

Would praise you so much after, “Oh what a good, patient girl for me. You definitely deserve a reward.”

Martin Mathias

Sfw

Martin wouldn’t comment most of the time. But if you were something he’d like then he would compliment you, probably the whole day.

Blushes when you show up in the suits. But if someone were to make fun of you and call you newspaper boy or some shit, he’d kill them after.

Anyone being mean to you is unacceptable!

Playfully steals your hats and you’d find him wearing them almost every time.

So when you wear some of his own, he would gush and not be able to avoid praising you.

Nsfw

Vampire sex is definitely the way to go, he bites down to draw blood and lick it up immediately.

He always tries to be intimate while you’re doing the, “sexy stuff” By kissing and trying to be romantic with candles around you.

Repeats that he loves you and you’re so beautiful and perfect to him. Always holding your hand during it as well.

Billy Loomis

Sfw

Billy would definitely be into it! Probably would buy some suits of his own to match with you.

You two would look so stylish! Even buy some causal vintage clothes, in school he would walk down the hallways with you and cause people to looked amazed.

Would be so confused if you stole on of his clothes, because he thinks your own clothes are already awesome.

Still wouldn’t mind however. In fact he finds it hot.

Nsfw

During sex, he has pet names, like;

Kitten, hun, baby girl, doll, things like that.

Especially if/when he wants to roleplay where he’s Ghostface and your the victim since he’s into that!

Thats when the sex gets messy with blood, knife play, gun play, etc.

Stu Macher

Sfw

Stu would comment about he loves your style everyday!

He’s a big dork so he loves making you laugh when everyone else would just look at him with a blank stare.

If you’re wearing the chapstick or lipstick he would love to purposely smear it while kissing or making out with you.

Nsfw

Like Billy, is into the Ghostface roleplay, and would like it if you were the killer sometimes.

Stu is a switch, he’s the top more often but if he’s in the mode to sub, he’ll beg for you if he needed to.

He’s not as serious as Billy so the sex while have a few good laughs with it. He’s more on the playful side and laid back!

Bubba Sawyer

Sfw

He’d also love it but since he doesn’t talk, he would show how he loves it in different ways.

By picking you up and hugging you, twirling you around while making laughing sounds.

Kiss him anywhere and he jumps around happily while blushing hard. It’s so cute!

Nsfw

Bubba prefers to sub but loves to dom for you anytime you’re ok with it.

Has the cutest whimpers and whines.

Give his body lots of love, he needs it. If you kiss, lick, or give his tummy hickeys he’s squirming and wiggling below you.

When it comes to giving you oral he’ll need some practice with it. But soon become so good at it! He’ll find ways to make you tick.

Brahms Heelsire

Sfw

It’s new to Brahms like Tiffany, but he can be into it.

You’re so beautiful in your suits, would want to dance with you while you’re wearing them.

Waltzing is his go-to dance, if you need help he would show you step by step.

Actually would make a mask for him! You’re his doll, so he thought it’d be fitting for you.

Nsfw

During sex, he uses his deep voice, would also let out the sexiest manly moans and growls.

Has a big breeding kink, even tho he’s not fond of having children, the idea alone of finishing inside gets him going.

Brahmsy has a habit of wanting to fuck on the counter when it’s dinner time, especially eagerly eating you out while you’re sitting on it.

Try’s to stay a good boy for when you give him rewards, but can be a big brat sometimes.

[codename-adler]

Dear Tumblr toxicity,

Hi. Adler here. We need to talk.

- TW: mental health issues, depression, bipolar disorder, self-harm, homophobia, transphobia, coming out, xenophobia, islamophobia, racism, implied sexual content, rape, non-con, addictions, abuse, parental negligence, depictions of violence, swearing (please message me kindly if I forget anything)

- What prompted this message: The release of Skam France S7 teaser (emphasis on teaser, will get into that below)

- Where I’m coming from: I will talk from the pov of a white, cis and queer 22-years-old woman (she/her); this is the pov that affects my experiences and the opinions I will share below; but my message comes from a place of deep hurt, and love

- What this is about: My goal is to share a recurring experience that has hurt me in order to spread a message of awareness, maturity, peace and love

- Central content: Skam France, Skam Wtfock, and Skam/remakes in general

From now on I will assume people have enough information for me to talk about the topics without explaining every plotline/character. There are plenty of wiki pages to help you out and I will gladly answer any (respectful) questions asked if a plothole bothers your comprehension of my message. I’m only making these assumptions in order to alleviate the text.

January 9th, 2021.

The francetv slash YouTube channel releases an unexpected teaser video for an equally unexpected seventh season Skam France. The video features Tiffany, a white, cis female teenager, going into labour from denial pregnancy just after winning what appears to be a gymnastics championship. Overall, the video and its release are very dramatic.

The character of Tiffany, also called Tiff, was previously seen on season 6 of Skam France as a bully who persecuted the main character, Lola, both at school and on social media. Outside of this characterization, nothing is known about her. It is majorly accepted that Tiff is not a liked character; she rather poses as one of the antagonists of Lola’s arc.

Now you know the details of what happened, in the most objectively possible way. 

Now I’ll speak for myself.

Before I went digging around for people’s reaction, here is what I initially thought of this video.

1) Shock: I thought Skam France was over, so... Big, big shock.

2) Excitement: I hold this web series very close to my heart. It has gotten me through depressive episodes, anxiety attacks, coming out to my best friend. To see this new development? It couldn’t bring me more joy.

3) Curiosity: I recognized Tiff immediately. I was intrigued as to what would happen to her to set off a new season in true Skam Fr fashion. As soon as she started gripping her stomach, I knew she was pregnant and wasn’t aware of it. Big, big surprise here again.

4) Numbness/Overthinking: As I stared at my screen, motionless, my mind went off. What did it mean? How did she not know? Who is the father? Do we know him? Will the baby survive? Where are the other characters? Will Lamifex be present? What? How? When? Why? Who?

5) Disappointment: No, I did not like Tiff one bit in S6. Yes, I sincerely wished for a season on either Jo (ambiguous and funny teenage girl, cis + white), Sekou (seemingly neurodivergent teenage boy, cis + black), and my favorite, Max (mysterious and grave teenage boy, trans + white) So why Tiff? It felt to me like a missed opportunity, but I did not lose hope.

So, these were the five stages of my emotional process. And then I made the terrible mistake to go look for the fans’ reaction. I didn’t even look at the YT comments, I didn’t go on Instagram, I went directly here on Tumblr. Why? I’m still asking myself that. From S1 to S6 of Skam Fr, I kept my love for the show to myself and only looked at ig and video edits. I tried once, and only once, to look it up on Tumblr, and was greeted by fervent agressivity, disrespect and hate. Why did I ever forget that after watching the S7 teaser? I still don’t know.

The reactions on this platform were wild. People are furious (I get that). People are disappointed (I get that). People are anxious (I get that). People are also verbally agressive, insensitive, hateful, disrespectful and bullies. I don’t get that.

Comments along the lines of “What she gonna do with a fucking baby?”, “Are we gonna watch the baby do nothing all fucking season?”, “Wowwww, teenage pregnancy, so new and relatable!” (note the sarcasm made in the comment here), “Who gives a shit about Tiff?”, etc. 

And then all the mistakes Skam Fr ever made flooded back onto the feed. The wlw misrepresentation, the whitewashing, the overdramatization, the dubious sex scenes between minors, all of it.

Let’s take a break here. Do I condone these mistakes? Nope. Am I a white-bully apologist? Nope. Did I forget every horrible action Tiff has made in the past? Nope. She manipulated a whole school against Lola, she profited from Lola’s mother’s death, she bullied her, harrassed her, pushed her deeper into mental distress. Tiff was a despicable character that I never once liked. The way she was played by the actress made it clear that Tiff was not intended to be a good guy. If I could replace her as the main of S7, I would, in a heartbeat. I’d choose, as I said, Jo, Sekou or Max.

Skam France deeply lacks diversity and made mistakes when attempting to diverse the issues represented. This is not an opinion, it’s a fact. 

Poc representation is very, very low. Only one season has a woc of Islam beliefs as mc (Imane, S4) with poc entourage/family. Only 2 other characters not related to Imane were poc (Sekou and Sarah, S1-S2). These 2 characters were very in the background and served to further the mc’s plotline, they had no real content. (I am not a poc, and so my opinion does not matter here. If you are not poc, your “opinions” don’t matter here, this point is not for you to debate. These are facts.)

While I do not particularly find the wlw representation bad, I do understand how it hurts/bothers other queer women. From my perspective, the bar was very low regarding my expectations of the Lola/Maya pair (none of them died *yay* they had a happy ending *yay* they were not typically overfeminized or overmasculinized *yay* Lola  and Maya were respectful of each other, understood each other, accepted each other with all their flaws and their beauty *yay* I truly believed in their love and it gave me confidence and hope *yay* I ould really go on but this is not my main point so I’ll stop here) Regardless of my opinion on Mayla, I understand that to some queer women, it was bothering/hurtful. (If you are anything other than a woman / wlw, this point is not for you to debate. Keep your “opinions” to yourself, it does not matter here. These are facts.)

Like every remake of the original Skam where the S4 was given to Sana/Imane, the Muslim community was not represented at its best, at its most beautiful and respectfully. The character of Imane, although she is my favorite girl of the series, was not portrayed in a way that respected the majority of the Muslim community. (If you are anything other than Muslim, this point is not for you to debate. Our opinions do not matter here. These are facts.)

And so the same goes for the portrayal of sexual assault and child pronography in S2, of mental illness and homophobia in S3, of disabilities in S5, of addiction, transphobia, self-harm and neurodivergence in S6. Again, if you are not part of these communities, your opinions do not matter on these issues. These are facts that are not up for debate.

In other words, Skam France, as well as the original Skam, Skam Wtfock, Skam España, and probably all the others I haven’t watched in their entirety, are NOT perfect shows. They (maybe) tried their best to portray issues of the younger generations that are ugly, shameful, taboo, hard-to-swallow-pills. Of course they made mistakes. Of course they have to be held accountable. Of course they can and should do better. Of course it must be spoken about.

Here is my problem.

The so-called “fans” shamelessly SHITTING on the WHOLE show because of ONE TEASER TRAILER. (btw, this is where I get angry)

I am not talking about the fans making fun of the show and this season’s premise like “Better MCs than Tiff for S7: a romance between the car that almost hit Lucas S3 and the car that hit Arthur S5, or the school’s nurse, or Imane’s dad, or Elu’s rabbit” (that shit’s funny and I’d watch all of these).Or the joke about Wtfock and Skam Fr shaking hands while signing the same contract to disappoint the fans with white MCs (it’s funny cuz it’s trueeeee).

I am not talking about the fans criticizing the producers’ choice of Tiff as MC. There is a difference between shitting on issues and adressing/discussing them. I WANT to talk about how this season’s issue would have been so much better if a woc, specifically a black woman, had been the MC, because black women and doctors are a whole different level of issue than white women and doctors. Add on top of that an unplanned teenage pregnancy? It would have been IMMACULATE. I WANT to talk which wlw couple was better represented, Mayla or Croana/Crisana, and why is that. I WANT to talk about disabilities in black and poc communities. I WANT to talk about headcanons, AUs, to rectify the missed marks. I WANT to talk about our takes on seasons about Max, Sekou and Jo, instead of Tiff’s.

I DO NOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT YOUR SHITTY, NEGATIVE, UNHELPFUL, HURTFUL COMMENTS.

Just because the protagonist is white, doesn’t give you ANY right to dismiss the issue that is unplanned teenage pregnancy. This is a problem that affects countries WORLDWIDE. Do you know how many deaths are related to minors giving birth? Do you know how many babies die at birth from these pregnancies? Do you have any idea the trauma it puts you through, to go into labor without even knowing you were pregnant in the first place, and then giving birth, and then having to care for a defensless human being? The dilemma of keeping it, or giving it away? The fear that lives in every person able to give birth, that one day they’ll become pregnant, because society turns sych a shameful look to that? No matter your ethnicity, your gender identity, your sexuality, your political stance or whatever shit you bring up to justify your disgraceful and downright degrading comments, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SAY THAT A MINOR GIVING BIRTH IS NOT AN ISSUE. 

You think the topic has been covered plenty before? Yeah, because shows like “16 and pregnant” and “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant!” are such good examples and show the reality with such an objective point of view! 

Bullshit. Teenage pregnancy is still a taboo, it still kills, and people are still morons about it. 

“Well I guess everybody is secretly pregnant now!” No, Jessica, but you wouldn’t know about it, would you? Because I wouldn’t tell you shit if you were my “friend” and I was going through it. The whole message of all the Skams is not that it presents super relatable issues of teenagers, although it is a big topic of the show. They present some issues that affect the youth in an authentic light, but that’s not it.

Tous les gens que tu rencontres mènent un combat dont tu ignores tout. 

Sois indulgente. Toujours. x x x

//

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.

Be kind. Always. x x x

THAT’S THE MESSAGE. THAT’S THE WHOLE POINT OF THE SHOW.

And you all missed it.

All of you making dead baby jokes and death threats, degrading people who give birth, shaming teenagers for their pregnancies... Listen to yourselves.

“Well she deserves it, she was such a bitch!” No, Michael, you shit stick. Let’s rewind a bit for you, yeah? It was a GOD DAMN TEASER. We literally know nothing! Nothing at all! Why are y’all getting mad when we saw 3:25 minutes representing a whole ass season! Listen to yourselves. Y’all judge so fast for people pretending to love Skam and its authenticity and its motto.

You say Tiff is irredeemable?

Emma cheated on her boyfriend.

Manon lied and manipulated her friends.

Lucas was homophobic and prejudiced agaisnt mentally ill people.

Imane was homophobic too and went behind her friends’ back to get what she wanted.

Arthur cheated on his girlfriend too.

Lola dragged Elliot down with her in her addiction, lied, was verbally abusive, etc.

ALL THE MAINS ARE PROBLEMATIC.

Any guess why?

BECAUSE THEY ARE TEENAGERS. THEY ARE STILL GROWING AND LEARNING.

Yet we still loved them all. 

So don’t you dare tell me that Tiff deserves this, that her baby deserves to die, that teenage motherhood is irrelevant. Motherhood is not a curse in the first place, nor is it something to wish to inflict upon anyone. Motherhood is different for every single person and nobody except the person living with it can have an opinion on that. We don’t even know if the baby survived, for God’s sake!

There is no excuse for this kind of behavior..

It makes me so angry. Women are discriminated against in a fandom I thought was safe, again and again and again. 

I have to stop here because, well, this is just too much. There is much wrong with Skam (the original AND all the remakes), but there is even more wrong with the fans. I’m done.

You don’t support the show anymore? Fine, then don’t watch it! If I really am wrong, the number of viewers will go down and the show will die, just like you wished. There is no need to be vicious about it. 

I hope y’all are proud of your misogyny. 

Sincerely,

Adler.

[aquaquadrant]

the little things

Kenji’s mouth is dry. “Ben…?” he croaks out.

Ben swallows. “Oh,” he says, in a very small voice. “It’s you.”

~*~

Ben’s been reunited with the other campers, and seems to have come out the other end of his experience stronger than ever before. But as he slowly finds his place back within the group, a bigger picture starts to emerge, piece by piece.

Rated T for: mental illness, mild language, panic attacks, PTSD, anxiety, insomnia, eating disorder (not in a traditional sense, but definitely not a healthy relationship with food)

A/N: Hey Camp Cretaceous fandom, y’all mind if I uhhhh write six-thousand words about Ben’s trauma?? Basically, Netflix kept recommending the show to me so I watched the first ep out of curiosity and then ended up binging the whole thing in like two days, and now here I am.

(Dear sweet, patient, regular readers of mine: I’m so sorry my main fic’s been delayed but I promise it’s getting updated next week, I just had to get some feelings out about Sad Dino Boy)

Hope you enjoy, please reblog and leave a comment if you do! - Aqua

Click here to read on A03 (with more complete tags)

~*~

the little things

~*~ 

Ben Pincus has returned from the dead, and he’s never been better.

The other campers are amazed. What he’s been through must have been horrible. He thought he was the only one left, that there was no one to help him and no hope of rescue because he was presumed dead. It would’ve been enough to drive anyone into despair, or off of the deep end.

But Ben shows no signs of this.

They didn’t find him holed up somewhere, near starvation and waiting to die, like one might’ve expected. They didn’t find him at all, really. He found them, and by coming to their rescue, no less. And when he did, he wasn’t a trembling mess, he wasn’t a half-mad ball of paranoia, and he wasn’t a hollow-eyed skeleton fueled solely by desperation. 

He’s an all new and improved Ben, the best version of himself.

He hasn’t just survived, he’s flourished. He’s brave, he’s confident, he’s capable. He gives his opinions freely and without second-guessing himself, suggesting things the old Ben would’ve recoiled at. He fits seamlessly into the team like he never left. He faces problems head-on with determination and grit and not a trace of fear.

The turnaround is unbelievable. But even more important is that while he’s a new and improved Ben, he’s retained all the best parts of his old self.

Ben is easy smiles and meticulous organization of a leather waist bag and doting affection for a four-ton armored lizard. He’s sensitive and soft-spoken and accepts hugs from his friends gratefully. He still can’t quite pull off coolness, with a voice that sounds as gangly as his limbs look and an awkwardness he hasn’t grown out of.

And it’s perhaps because of this that no one thinks to look closer. This image is an easy thing to accept because it’s what they all want to believe, that Ben is okay- in fact, better than okay. But the truth is not always big and obvious upon first glance.

It’s the little things, as they soon find out.

~*~

That first evening after Ben’s return, after Mitch and Tiff and everything else, they don’t eat dinner.

They all ate their fill at the campsite and, after a month of scarcity, it was more than enough to sate their appetites. It’s Darius who thinks to ask Ben if he’s hungry, remembering that the boy hadn’t had the chance to eat with them. They have a good stockpile of food at the moment and he figures Ben must’ve been struggling.

But Ben shakes his head with an easy smile, and says, “Nah, I ate earlier.”

Darius leaves it at that, because there’s still so much catching up to do. They show Ben around their clubhouse, make plans for where to build a bunk for him (he insists he’d be just fine sleeping on the ground next to Bumpy, but they all veto that immediately). They talk well into the night about the day’s crazy events, filling each other in on their own sides of the story, and everything that’s happened since Ben got separated.

There are some more tears, some more hugs. But ultimately, the mood in the clubhouse is ecstatic. They never thought Ben had survived the fall so to have him back is better than a dream come true, it’s a miracle.

Darius thought he knew what it was to experience a miracle when they first saw that bonfire smoke on the horizon. But if he had to chose between the miracle of them finally leaving the island or the miracle of getting Ben back, it’s not even a competition.

Eventually the exhaustion catches up with everyone, and they turn in for the night. Bumpy parks herself underneath the clubhouse, her presence incredibly reassuring. Ben ends up sharing Kenji’s bunk because it’s bigger than Darius’s even when occupied by two, and the older teen had insisted in a very faux-casual way, to which Ben had rolled his eyes but nonetheless seemed touched by the gesture.

Darius takes the first night watch shift and gets to see all his friends sleeping peacefully. And even though Tiff sailed away with their only means for escaping, he feels a lot more hopeful than he has in a long time.

~*~

It’s canned peaches for breakfast.

A far cry from yesterday’s buffet. But no one’s complaining because the meticulous rationing of their food, courtesy of Darius, means they’re all starving by meal time and couldn’t care less what it tastes like. Darius is in the process of separating the food out into bowls, half a can for each of them, when he realizes Ben has yet to take a seat. He’s lingering at the edge of the room, watching.

“Hey,” Darius calls, “you coming or what?”

Ben shakes his head. “Thanks, but I already got my own breakfast.”

Before Darius can respond, Brooklynn shoots Ben a look. “What? Where?” she demands. “You holding out on us, jungle boy?”

Darius shoots her a look, but Ben just gives an easy smile and unzips the leather pouch that’s reclaimed its spot around his waist. He withdraws a small handful of bright red berries, no bigger than blueberries. It’s not even a fraction of the half-can of peaches the rest of them are settling for, and Darius sees his own unease reflected in the others’ eyes.

Brooklynn glances away. “Oh. Um, sorry. You don’t… you can have some of ours, you know?”

“I’m good.” Ben tosses a couple berries into his mouth. “You guys go ahead, I’m gonna go check on Bumpy.”

“O- oh, okay…” Sammy murmurs, watching Ben go with uncertain eyes. “If you’re sure…”

They’re silent for a moment.

Kenji inhales quietly through his teeth. “So… that’s weird, right?”

Yaz leans forward in her seat. “What do you think, Darius?” she asks lowly.

Darius bites his lip. Even though dinosaurs are his specific topic of interest, he’s gained a lot of second-hand knowledge about general biology and psychology. After all, he has to understand the processes behind behavior in order to identify patterns and deviations.

And right now, he has to admit that Ben is displaying a very concerning behavior.

“I’ll talk to him,” Darius decides.

There’s a collective sigh of relief around the table, and the others start eating. It takes Darius longer than usual to finish his serving.

~*~

“So, uh, bottom line is… you don’t need to feel bad about eating our food. You’re as much a part of this group as anyone else, and we’re happy to share.”

After a couple tense days, Darius is finally talking to Ben about the food situation. Or rather, talking at him. Because Ben’s not looking at Darius- his eyes are tracking the small spider that’s crawling along the railing next to them. Normally, Darius would take it as a sign of boredom and inattentiveness. But there’s an intensity in Ben’s eye that’s a little unsettling-

Quick as a flash, Ben shoots out an arm. He crushes the spider under his thumb and swipes it into his mouth. And then, untroubled as can be, he returns his focus to Darius as if nothing had happened.

Darius has overheard Kenji teasing Ben about eating bugs, and Ben has admitted as much in the stories of his time alone. Berries and grubs were what he lived on. Darius, for one, can’t imagine being hungry and desperate enough to snatch a bug off the ground and eat it.

But it’s even harder to imagine having access to real food, good food, and still choosing to eat bugs.

“Don’t worry so much,” Ben says lightly, patting Darius on the shoulder as he turns to go. “I can take care of myself.”

That does it. “You can’t keep living off berries and grubs!” Darius finally snaps.

Ben whirls around. “Says who?”

“Basic human biology!” Darius retorts.

Ben glares at him, but there’s something shaky behind it. “Darius, I told you it’s fine,” he says evenly, though he doesn’t fully meet Darius’s gaze. “Don’t make a big deal out of it. Please? If I’m hungry, I’ll eat.”

Darius hesitates. “You promise?”

Ben breaks into an easy smile. “I promise.”

Darius sighs. It’ll have to be good enough, for now.

“Okay.”

~*~

Darius knows he isn’t the only one still concerned by Ben’s lack of appetite.

Right from the start, Ben was the scrawniest one among them, and it’s only gotten worse. But surely he’ll have to eat at some point, right? Basic survival instincts will win out over whatever stubborn mindset is holding him back. Plus, it’s clear that he’s got enough energy to run and climb and stuff with no problem.

Maybe it’s not as serious as Darius thinks. Maybe Ben just needs time.

~*~

Ben doesn’t know what’s wrong with him.

He just- he can’t take their food! Why don’t they get that?

And it’s not because he’s stubborn, it’s not- no matter what Darius thinks. There’s nothing wrong with letting others help you (as long as you don’t let it make you soft, of course). After all, he relies on Bumpy. He just… when he looks at the food, and imagines eating it, he just knows it’ll sit in his stomach. Like a rock, weighing him down.

Plus, plus, if he gets used to eating like that, it’ll just- it’ll be harder to cope once it runs out. He’s already gotten used to roughing it and it was hard enough the first time, he can’t let himself slip back into complacency. And- and really, how long do they think it’s going to last? They’ve searched all the previously inhabited areas of the island and there’s no more food for them to scavenge.

Do they think they’ll be rescued before it runs out? No one is coming to save them. They know it as much as Ben does- they wouldn’t be bothering with rafts if they didn’t. Do they think they’ll escape, then? Sure, because their current attempts have been going so well.

No, they just aren’t thinking long term. Ben is.

There’s nothing wrong with that.

~*~

It’s the sixth day in a row where Ben eats nothing but berries.

He wants to search around some more, see if there’s anything more substantial. That would require him to leave Bumpy, though. And he can’t leave Bumpy. But the hunger is excruciating. It gnaws at him every waking moment, keeps him up at night. He’s never felt such hunger in his life, not even close. He can’t keep going like this, can he?

But there’s nothing else.

Except… something’s crawling up his arm. Something small, and leggy. Ben turns his head, squinting to focus his eyes in the dark. It’s some kind of beetle, with a shiny shell that catches stray shafts of moonlight poking through the roof of his lean-to.

Ben stares at it for a moment. Then, before he can think, he snatches it up and pops it into his mouth. He barely registers any taste, mostly just the crunchy texture. And even though it wasn’t any bigger than a quarter, after he swallows, he feels… fuller. Even if it’s purely imagined, it’s a comfort.

Berries and grubs. It’ll have to be enough.

There’s nothing else.

~*~

Ben continues to decline their offers of food.

~*~

A few weeks after the reunion, Kenji is starting to get antsy.

As the self-designated ‘pro-fun police’ (a clever play on ‘no-fun police,’ if Kenji does say so himself), he’s made it his responsibility to make sure none of his friends just keel over and die from stress one day. That means it’s his job- no, his duty- to lighten the mood with copious amounts of joking, goofing off, and, of course, pranking.

Jumping out to scare his friends while they’re trapped on a dino-infested island might, on paper, sound like a bad idea. But it keeps everyone on their toes, and the relief of realizing they aren’t facing a dino attack, just Kenji pulling a prank, helps keep any real anger at bay. It’s typically an exasperated annoyance, which Kenji will gladly take. His main targets are Brooklynn and Darius, because he can’t fathom doing that to Sammy, and Yaz is- while perhaps in the most need of lightening up- super freaking scary.

But now that Ben’s back, Kenji knows what he has to do.

Before, back when they were just campers and not survivors, Ben was easily the most frightened of them. The kid was scared of dirt. And his over-the-top hysterics always managed to, somehow, put everyone else at ease. Because if Ben was scared of something, that didn’t really mean anything. Again; scared of dirt.

(Now, if Yaz is scared of something, that’s a different story).

Since Ben’s, uh… departure, they’ve been sorely lacking that energy in the group. Kenji would wager he’s not the only one who misses it. He used to have so much fun riling Ben up with just a couple words (none of the others are so easily baited). And whenever Ben would freak out and instantly cling to him, like some kind of scrawny spider monkey, it made Kenji feel… capable, in a way.

Like, if Ben was trusting Kenji to protect him, maybe he wasn’t so useless after all (which was becoming an all too frequent feeling as the others continued to adapt and grow, leaving Kenji struggling to keep up).

Problem is, Ben’s really hard to scare now.

It’s not always obvious, like when he’s bragging about taking down Toro or itching to blow things up. Sometimes it’s the little things. Whenever they’re out in a group, foraging or gathering supplies, and there’s a sound in the distance that makes them all freeze, Ben’s frozen in readiness, not fear. He looks more like Yaz, tense and waiting with his fists up and eyes narrowed.

Sometimes, when they aren’t occupied by any particular task or imminent threat, and have the chance to enjoy some downtime, Ben drifts off to the side and just… watches, all tense, silent, and anxious. He’ll watch the tree line, or Bumpy on the ground below, or even just the rest of them as they go about their business. Kenji is sure he’s not the only one who’s noticed but none of them bring it up.

It’s… unsettling, seeing Ben like this. Kenji figured he just needed a couple weeks to fall back into the rhythm of the group, to see that he didn’t have to be this loner Rambo type of guy anymore. But even though he talks with them easy enough, seems to enjoy their company, and has a good handle on teamwork, it’s like there’s a part of him that can’t fully shake that mentality.

At least, not without help.

~*~

 Kenji’s plan is- in his humble opinion- pretty dang brilliant.

He waits for a time when it’s just him and Ben in the main level of the clubhouse (Yaz is running laps around their perimeter, Darius is in his bunk writing in his nerd book, Brooklynn and Sammy are upstairs going over inventory) and then announces he’s going for a shower. His daily showers are common knowledge at this point, so Ben just nods in acknowledgement and goes back to leaning against the railing, watching Bumpy graze down below in that tense-silent-anxious way of his.

Kenji sets up the shower and lets it run (he’ll go down to the river later and get more water to make up for the waste, because even though he tries to avoid manual labor whenever possible, it’s totally worth it in this case). And then, being more careful and silent than he’s ever been (except maybe in cases where he’s being hunted by dinos), he slowly creeps up behind Ben before leaping forward with a shriek, grabbing him by the shoulders.

Ben doesn’t just jump and scream. He jumps, screams, then spins around and swings a fist into Kenji’s jaw in one smooth motion.

Kenji’s laughing even as he staggers back, his jaw stinging (because at the end of the day, even though Ben’s kind of a badass now, he’s still Ben and his arms are pretty much chicken wings so there’s no real harm done, just a bruise at most). Plus that’s a valid reaction, considering everything, and he can’t say he didn’t deserve it.

“Oh man, I totally got you!” Kenji says anyways, to rub it in. “You should see your… face...”

And Kenji trails off because now he’s seeing Ben’s face.

What Kenji expected is this:

Once Ben realized it was just him pulling a prank, he would get mad. In that totally non-threatening dorky Ben way, where he scrunches his nose and puffs out his cheeks, his little fists clenched at his side like an irate toddler. Maybe he’d stomp off but it’d be worth it because being mad is better than being tense-silent-anxious and it’d give him the chance to be annoyed with Kenji. And maybe Ben being annoyed with Kenji would help everything feel a little more normal, a little more like before.

What Kenji gets is this:

Once Ben realizes it was just him pulling a prank, he doesn’t get mad. He starts shaking. Violently, uncontrollably. Like he’s suddenly come down with hypothermia despite being in a tropical jungle, staring at Kenji all the while and not saying a word. His chest rises and falls rapidly in little panicky breaths and the kind of fear in his eyes isn’t the kind that’s funny. It’s glassy-eyed with shrunken pupils that dart around Kenji’s face, frightened and searching, as if he isn’t fully seeing it.

Kenji’s mouth is dry. “Ben…?” he croaks out.

Ben swallows. “Oh,” he says, in a very small voice. “It’s you.”

Kenji hasn’t heard Ben’s voice sound that small since before, and it doesn’t feel like a victory.

By now, of course, the others have noticed the commotion and it doesn’t take more than a second for them to piece together what happened. Yaz rounds on Kenji with a furious snarl and whisper-screams a lecture about how stupid and irresponsible he is. Darius is immediately trying to mediate the situation while Sammy frantically asks Ben if he’s okay, to which he doesn’t respond. Brooklynn steps in, citing an unboxing video about dealing with shock, and when she goes to put a hand on Ben’s shoulder, he lets her.

And now Kenji realizes where he miscalculated. Ben never showed discomfort with physical contact before because he’d never been surprised by it before (because Ben has gotten scary good at being alert, always keeping an eye and an ear out on his surroundings even in the middle of a conversation). And when it came to his friends, it wasn’t unexpected for Sammy to rush in with a hug or Darius to pat his shoulder or Brooklynn to playfully knock elbows.

But Kenji snuck up on him, so Ben’s first thought wasn’t that it was a friend. It was that he was going to have to run for his life, like he has countless times since being stranded on this island.

Kenji apologizes over and over again as Darius gently leads him away by the elbow and Brooklynn talks to Ben in low tones while Sammy squeezes his hand and Yaz takes up a lookout position because they can’t afford for all of them to be distracted even though she occasionally cuts a glare at Kenji out of the corner of her eye so it’s really debatable how vigilant she’s actually being.

Throughout it all, Ben doesn’t get mad, but he doesn’t stop shaking.

 ~*~

 Darius explains it, later.

“The sudden fear reaction signaled a bunch of adrenaline to be released into his bloodstream, to give him the energy needed for running. And then, when he didn’t, there was nowhere for that energy to go. It’s like, even though his mind knew there wasn’t any danger, his body wasn’t convinced.” Then, a sympathetic look. “You didn’t know, man.”

Kenji only nods. But knowing doesn’t make it better because even though Ben’s stopped shaking he doesn’t turn his back on Kenji anymore and somehow that’s a million times worse than if he’d gotten mad.

 ~*~

 There are claws wrapped around Ben’s shoulders and shrieks in his ears.

Wind whips his face and his stomach lurches as he’s carried through the air, weightless, at the mercy of the Pteranodon. He’s never felt so small and utterly helpless before, not once in his life. Even his screams aren’t big enough to carry, snatched away by the wind and deafened by the roars of the terror-birds fighting over the right to tear him limb from limb.

And then he’s falling and has other things to worry about.

 ~*~

 Ben stops sharing Kenji’s bunk.

 ~*~

 In a rare moment of downtime, Yasmina is curled up with Darius’s field guide, adding a few more illustrations, when she feels Ben staring at her.

It’s not the first time she’s felt him staring at her. It is the first time, however, that she decides to stare back.

She means it to be playful, at first. She meets his eyes, one brow quirked as if to say, ‘What, is there something on my face?’ But instead of glancing away in sheepish embarrassment or jolting out of a daze, Ben just stares back. There’s no emotion in his expression at all except intense focus.

The faint smile drops from Yasmina’s face as she stares back in surprise. Then, with ever-growing confusion and a fair amount of alarm, she realizes that Ben’s shoulders are rising, tense and hunched like he’s trying to make himself look bigger.

Like an animal.

Yasmina knows what it is to stare down a wild animal. She’s felt predatory eyes on her before and either bolted or turned to face the challenge. And that’s what it is, for some of the dinos- a challenge. Sometimes they’re testing your mettle, and standing your ground is enough to make them back off.

Ben must’ve learned that, too. And for whatever reason, he’s slipping into that behavior now.

It’s a ridiculous thought. This is Ben, her friend. Her very scrawny friend who can’t weigh more than ninety pounds soaking wet, and prefers a diet of berries and grubs. And yet, here he is, staring her down like she’s a particularly bold pack of Compies that’s decided to threaten him.

Yasmina gives a slow, deliberate blink. “Ben?” she calls. “What’s up?”

Just like that, the spell is broken. Ben gives a violent start, blinking and shaking his head. Yasmina sees confusion flash across his face, and then realization. And now the embarrassment comes, but it’s darkened by something like horror.

Without a word, Ben turns and darts away, scrambling down the ladder to the alcove underneath the house where Bumpy’s napping.

Yasmina lets him go, too baffled and unsettled to form words.

 ~*~

 Eventually, Yasmina tells Darius about it.

His expression is troubled as she runs through the incident. But in the end, there’s nothing more he can tell her than what she’s already worked out on her own. It’s just another side effect of the mindset Ben has adopted throughout his isolation. Those habits were what he relied on to survive, and it’ll take time for him to realize he doesn’t have to constantly be on edge now that he’s got a team to look out for him.

Though privately, Yasmina wonders if maybe the rest of them should take a page out of Ben’s book. Seems like he’s got a better handle on survival than they do.

(And then she thinks how Sammy would react, if Yasmina started acting like a wary animal around her, and she realizes Ben’s methods come with a price.)

 ~*~

 After Ben runs the Compies off for the first time, staring becomes a defense tactic.

It’s not always the Compies, who are slowly but surely learning not to mess with him. Sometimes it’s the Parasaurolophus in the river, or the lone Pteranodon perched in a tree, or the group of Edmontosauruses grazing on the hilltop. As soon as he feels their eyes on him, he knows his best chance is to stare back, to show that he’s willing to put up a fight, that chasing him wouldn’t be worth it.

Obviously, there are some dinosaurs that doesn’t work on. But if Ben can drastically cut down the amount of time spent running for his life by standing his ground, then he’ll take it.

All he has to do is not back down.

 ~*~

 Ben avoids Yasmina for the next few days.

 ~*~

 Brooklynn wakes up in the middle of the night with an unshakeable feeling that something is wrong.

Her bad feeling is confirmed when she gets a look at the moon. Based on its position in the sky, she should’ve been woken up by Ben to take her night watch shift at least an hour ago. This practice, established by Darius months ago who insisted they should always have at least one person awake, has already become routine within the group. Brooklynn couldn’t sleep fully through the night if she tried.

Ben’s only just recently become a part of the routine. Immediately after his return, Darius thought it best just to let Ben settle in and get as much rest as he could, now that he had the security to do so, and everyone agreed. Ben had insisted he didn’t mind, but Darius stood firm, so it’s only been within the last few days that Ben took part.

But this is the first time he hasn’t woken Brooklynn up and her heart is in her throat as she rushes to the lookout point-

Only to find Ben sitting right where he’s supposed to be, looking out over their compound as a small candle burns next to him.

As soon as Brooklynn’s relief passes, it’s replaced with anger. “What are you doing?” she whispers furiously.

Ben, not at all surprised by her presence, gives her a sidelong look. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“You were supposed to wake me up, so I could do night watch.” Brooklynn struggles to keep her voice low, so as not to alert the others. “What gives?”

Ben shrugs. “I knew I wasn’t gonna sleep tonight, so I figured I’d just take the whole watch myself.”

“That’s not how this works,” Brooklynn hisses, crossing her arms. “Even if you can’t fall asleep- and I’ve totally been there- you have to lay down and close your eyes and rest. You need to rest.”

Ben breaks into an easy smile, but Brooklynn can see the annoyed creases at his eyes. “Hey, it’s fine. I can-”

“Take care of yourself, I know,” Brooklynn interrupts, hating how frustrated she sounds but unable to help it. “But you don’t have to. We’re a team. We can take care of you too, alright?”

Ben stares at her for a moment. “I know that,” he says, sounding uncertain.

Brooklynn softens. When she reaches out to put a hand on his shoulder, he lets her. “Then… why?”

“I don’t know,” Ben admits. The muscles beneath Brooklynn’s hand are so tense, it feels like they’re going to snap. “I don’t know.”

They finish the night watch together.

 ~*~

 Brooklynn almost hates to bring it up to Darius.

Dude’s stressing almost nonstop about everything, all the time. And it really isn’t fair for him to be responsible for the rest of them, including Ben. But Darius is the only one who seems to have the… what’s it called, emotional intelligence, she supposes, to weigh in on the situation.

(Sammy is a close second, but her brand of caring is a little more touchy-feely, and this doesn’t seem like the right time for that.)

Darius is immediately worried, pointing out that Ben might accidentally fall asleep on watch if he keeps this up (something Brooklynn hadn’t even thought about). He promises to talk to Ben about it, and that’s that.

Brooklynn is only slightly relieved because she knows if Darius had a real fix for the problem, he would’ve said so. And if Darius doesn’t have a fix for it, maybe there isn’t one.

 ~*~

 Those first several nights, Ben doesn’t sleep at all.

And it’s not for lack of trying. But how can he sleep, when it’s pitch black and the jungle is full of unfamiliar sounds and he’s got no one but a baby Ankylosaurus by his side? He soon finds it’s even worse without Bumpy, though, because at least he trusted that Bumpy would wake up if there was any danger, as her senses are more powerful than his.

On his own, there’s no one to wake him up. So he has to stay up, and settle for catching short scattered naps throughout the day (if he can find a tree to hide up in).

It’s hard, but he’d rather be tired than dead.

 ~*~

 Ben is taken off night watch, but still ends up awake more often than not.

 ~*~

 Pyromaniac is a word no one ever expected to become synonymous with Ben, and yet here they are.

It’s one of the first things he always suggests as an answer to a problem; blow something up. Darius has a million reasons for them not to do that; they could get hurt, they could start a wildfire and burn the jungle down, they could attract unwanted attention from predators.

But that doesn’t stop Ben from cataloguing everything on the island that can be used as an explosive, memorizing their locations or creating hidden stashes. It doesn’t stop him from using the candles that came with the scavenged emergency kits. He’ll light them for no reason, just to watch the small flame flicker back and forth.

(Someday, months later, they’ll encounter a horrific hybrid dinosaur that is drawn to flames, and they’ll all think about how unsettling it is that Ben shares this trait, but none of them will say it.)

 ~*~

 It’s been one week since Bumpy left, and Ben is starting a fire.

Just a small one. It rained all day and he’s soaked to the bone, which normally wouldn’t be a huge problem considering the jungle climate. But now that it’s nighttime, there’s a chill in the air and he can’t afford to get sick. It’s risky, because at night he knows the light could draw attention to him, but his teeth are starting to chatter so there’s no helping it.

When a Stegosaurus stumbles upon him, baying low and angry at finding another creature in its territory, it’s the fire that makes it balk. Rumbling displeasure, it retreats back into the dark jungle. Ben quickly adds torches to his arsenal, using the rest of his shirt as tinder.

Fire is safety.

 ~*~

 Ben lights his candles in silence.

 ~*~

 “You can’t just run off like that,” Kenji says, deadly serious.

Ben scoffs. “I think you’re forgetting who defeated Toro,” he says with an easy smile.

“You’re not invincible, Ben!” Kenji snaps. The anger churning inside him is deceptively hollow, like it’s masking something else. “And I can’t lose you again.”

Ben isn’t smiling anymore. “You won’t,” he mutters, pushing past Kenji. “I can take care of myself, now. I don’t need you to play the hero and protect me.”

Kenji wants to protest that’s not what this is about, and that’s never been what this is about, but Ben is already gone.

 ~*~

 Ben still lives off berries and grubs.

 ~*~

 “… and so I was thinking, berries have seeds in them, right? So if we plant some, we’ll have our own berry bushes at the clubhouse. It’ll cut down our foraging time in the mornings for sure, and-”

“Uh, who are you talking to, Ben?”

Ben blinks at Yasmina’s voice, the girl having only just entered the room.

“Um, Bumpy?” he says, as if this should be obvious.

Yasmina glances out at the compound, where Bumpy is fast asleep and well out of earshot.

“… right.”

 ~*~

 Ben can’t sleep, even when he’s actually trying.

 ~*~

 “Alright,” Darius says, “so we need to get the T-Rex out of Main Street so we can do another sweep for supplies. Any ideas?”

Ben’s hand goes up.

“For the hundredth time, Ben, we aren’t going to feed the T-Rex to the Mosasaurus.”

Ben’s hand goes down.

 ~*~

 Ben feels more at home with Bumpy than the other campers.

 ~*~

 “You know we didn’t mean to leave you, right? We would’ve come back for you if we’d known…”

 ~*~

 Ben never talks about getting off the island.

 ~*~

 “You have to tell us where you’re going, Ben, you can’t just disappear-”

 ~*~

 Ben keeps slipping away.

 ~*~

“Blowing stuff up isn’t the answer to everything!”

~*~

 Ben keeps saying he’s okay.

 ~*~

 “We’re a team, we have to work together-”

 ~*~

 Ben keeps smiling.

 ~*~

 “Don’t you trust us to protect you?”

 ~*~

 Ben doesn’t know.

 ~*~

 Sammy finds Ben sitting on the roof of the clubhouse one day.

Her footsteps are loud and obvious as she approaches him. No chance of sneaking up. She knows he’s noticed her, from the subtle shift in his body. He doesn’t acknowledge her, though, continuing to stare off over the jungle and into the horizon, his skinny legs slotted through the railing and dangling over the edge.

The sun’s about to set, a few stars already twinkling in the purple edges of the sky. Sammy can remember another night, months ago, where Ben wasn’t here but everyone else was and they spotted bonfire smoke in the distance. She remembers the way her heart raced, the overwhelming joy and relief flooding through her. And yet, there had been undeniable heartache, because the realization that they’d made it out only meant it was more unfair that Ben hadn’t.

Sammy breaks the silence after a few moments.

“Are you okay?”

Ben doesn’t look at her, but she can see the easy smile that slants across his face, dying sunlight reflected in his eyes.

“Yeah.”

Sammy sees the lie for what it is. None of them are okay. No one who’s been through what they have would be. But there’s a certain danger that comes with not being willing to admit it, and an even greater danger that comes with not being able to see it.

“Y’know, it’d be fine if you weren’t.”

Ben doesn’t answer.

Sammy sits with him until the sky turns dark.

 ~*~

 It’s the way he struggles to eat anything he hasn’t obtained by himself.

It’s the way he sometimes goes off on his own without telling anyone.

It’s the way he talks to himself when he thinks no one else is around.

It’s the way he takes any concern for his safety as a personal attack.

It’s the way he leaps at the chance to blow something up.

It’s the way he can stare silently for hours.

It’s the way he smiles a little too easily.

 ~*~

 It’s not jumping at every unexpected movement, or screaming awake from night terrors, or flinching away from the slightest touch. It’s not loud meltdowns or hysterical sobbing or uncontrollable fits of rage.

(Even though those will come, someday, when the island is just a memory.)

It’s the little things, that- once you notice them- keep piling up.

And suddenly, they don’t seem so little anymore.

 ~*~

[fandom-puff]

Can you do me a headcanon of being the a Shelby sis and coming home with a POC girl for Sunday lunch? 😇😇

Thank you for requesting this!

I ended up turning it into a little oneshot. The reader is about 11 in this, and is younger than Finn.

Warnings: period typical predjudice

Welcome

Sunday lunches on watery lane were eventful to say the least. Polly (and Tommy too) insisted on the whole family having dinner together around the table, a whole roast chicken fresh from the butchers and Polly’s best creamy mashed potatoes. There was to be no talk of violence or business or anything like that at the dinner table, and thanks to you and Finn, the youngest of the family, being allowed to sit there, the small room was oddly... lighthearted.

“John, where’s Esme? I’m about to put the gravy on,” polly said.

“She’s staying home today, Pol, morning sickness,”

“And why aren’t you seeing to her, eh, brother,” Arthur teased, slapping his back.

“Kicked me out the house, said she can’t be doing with my hovering,” he grinned. “She left the kids with Mrs Wallace down the street to play with her lot, you know, Paul and Lucy and the little one,”

“Yeah, them lot. YN like playing with them,” she nodded

“Yeah, when we kick her out the betting shop,” Arthur grinned. “Speaking of which, where is our sweet sister,”

There was a brief moment of silence before you tumbled through the door, panting. “Pol- Tommy- I need- quick!” You said, bending over and panting. Polly frowned as Tommy tipped your chin up to face him.

“What’s wrong, YN, love? How’ve you cut your head like that?” Polly asked, already getting ready to wipe the gravel out of your forehead. Your brothers were all standing up looking thunderous, even Finn, who was mostly skin and bones and very short compared to the others.

“No- no time,” you insisted, trying to catch your breath. “Please, Tom! Some kids from school, some bigger kids, they started shouting at us- at me and my friend,”

“I’ll bloody kill ‘em” Arthur growled, rolling his sleeves up.

“Please, Tommy! I need you to help my friend! They’re calling her names like they call Jeremiah! I told them to fuck off like John said when people say stuff, but they pushed me down and carried on! I think they’re hurting her, Tom!” You cried, near tears as you pulled your second eldest brother to the door.

“Right,” Tommy said. He normally get involved with children’s tiffs, often letting Polly sort out yours and finn’s squabbles, but the panic in your eyes told him all he needed to know. There was a little girl in danger. “Arthur, John, you come with me. Finn, you run to Jeremiah’s house and tell him to meet us here,”

“What’s your friend’s name, YN?” Polly asked gently, steering you away from the boys. The shelby’s were always keen to keep you away from the violent side of life.

“Maria, Pol, but her last name isn’t Jesus,” you said, letting your aunt sit you down as your brothers left.

“I know, love, but her parents might see Jeremiah to hear him preaching,” she said softly.

“Will my friend be okay, aunt Pol?” You whispered in a small voice. Polly took a breath and considered her answer for a moment. The streets of Small Heath were dangerous at the best of times, even more so for the black people. Jeremiah Jesus faced abuse daily for preaching the word of the lord, and unless his little boy was with Finn, he wasn’t included in the games that the children played.

“I hope so,” was all she could say, pulling you in for a hug. Soon Finn came back with Jeremiah. You clung to your aunt as they asked you questions. About the little girl.

“Maria... yes. Her mother comes to my sermons. Father killed in Verdun. Finn, I need you to run down to the little church, you know the one, and ask for Mrs Oliver, tell her I sent you. Go, run! I’ll give you tuppemce if you’re back in ten minutes, eh?” Finn nodded and led straight away. You gripped Polly’s hand as she spoke about God and Jesus with Jeremiah. You didn’t really understand it. If god was meant to be so kind, why did he make people so horrible? Why did he make good people suffer just because of their skin colour. You were about to ask this when John came through the door, guiding your friend inside.

Maria looked terrified. Her dark eyes were wide with worry, but she seemed to relax slightly when she saw her friend, as well as her priest. You ran to her, wrapping your arms around her as John said his older brothers would be home in a bit- they were sorting some things out...

Polly soon managed to pull you off Maria. “Come on, love, let me have a look at them poor hands,”she said gently, her voice soft as she patched her up. You let the grown ups talk to her, simply glad that your friend was okay- physically at the very least. When her mother arrived she cried, hugging her close and hiding her face in her coat. Arthur and Tommy soon arrived, muttering about ignorant pigs.

Tommy cleared his throat slightly and offered his hand out. “Mrs Oliver. Thomas Shelby. We’ve... seen to the boys who attacked your daughter,”

“Mr Shelby! I’m so sorry... we didn’t mean to bother you like that,” she said, worried, digging around in her pocket for money, but Tommy cut her off.

“None of that, now, eh? Any friend of YN’s is a friend of ours,”

“Why don’t you join us for Sunday lunch?” Polly said suddenly.

“I... it’s no trouble, really, Ma’am,” Mrs oliver nibbled her lip gently, holding her daughter close. “I wouldn’t want to... inconvenience you, or- or dirty your China...” she hung her head, shutting her eyes.

“Nonsense,” Polly said firmly. “You’re welcome here, the both of you. You too Jeremiah, you look like you haven’t had a proper meal all week. Sit, all of you. There’s plenty for everyone, and you’re all welcome in my home, D’you hear?”

There was no arguing with the Shelby matriarch. All nine of you huddled around the table to eat, and when grace was said, you and Maria linked pinky fingers under the table. When Pol swept you off for bed, Tommy insisted Arthur walk Mrs Oliver and Maria home as it was getting dark out. He also added in an undertone to Jeremiah to ensure a small fund went to their household- Tommy remembered Mr Oliver from France.

“Thank you, Mr Shelby,” Mrs Oliver whispered. “For protecting my daughter,”

He nodded solemnly. Once they left, he went to your room, where you sat up in bed. “Hey, it’s ride to eavesdrop,” he said gently, sitting on the edge of your bed. You wrapped your arms around him, hiding your face in his neck.

“Thank you,” you whispered. “You and John and Arthur and Finn and Pol and Jeremiah,” Tommy ribbed your back gently, shushing you.

“It was very brave to stand up for your friend, YN,” he murmured. “I’m proud of you, yeah,”

You looked up at him. “She’ll be okay, right?” You asked, frowning. Tommy looked down, eyes flickering with guilt. “Promise?”

He swallowed. “I can’t promise you that, YN. I promise we’ll help as much as we can, alright. But there’s some people in this world who are ignorant fucks. Ignorant fucks who are evil and horrible to others, you hear me? It’s not fair, I know, and it’s not right either. But you stood up to them ignorant fucks today, and it was brave of you. I’m proud of you,”

You sighed as he tucked you back in and kissed your forehead. “I’m not the brave one, Tom. It’s Maria and her mum and Jeremiah who’re the brave ones. Cos they put up with them ignorant fucks every single day. And I’m gonna make it so they don’t have to be brave, Tom. Cos I’m gonna make it so them horrible people get punished for treating other human beings like-like... shit, Tom. Promise,”

He smiled softly at you. He knew you were strong. You would cause him an eternal headache when you were older, but he knew your heart was in the right place.

“I know you will, YN. Go check on your friend tomorrow. And, er, just make sure Pol doesn’t hear you say ‘ignorant fuck’ alright?”

[idabbleincrazy]

ooooo headcanons. So i have a ofc who is the sister of angel and it got me to thinking. How would Spike react to reader being in love with him (her being angel's sister)

Ok, so this totally would depend on when Reader fell in love with him...

During The Whirlwind years:

He would let you down gently, his dead heart still being fiercely loyal to Dru. 

That’s not to say he would take sex off the table (hello, vampire). 

He would also probably ask you to keep your feelings hidden from both Angelus and Dru, not wanting them to get upset or jealous...Angelus is your Sire after all (yes, this is weird, even to them, but Darla wouldn’t do it, and Angelus simply refused to leave you behind) and sister or not, he sees you as his, more so even than he sees Drusilla as his. 

Spike knows it wouldn’t end well for either of you if your Sires questioned where your love lies. 

After The Curse: 

Spike warms up to you slowly. 

He’s all about family, and he’s just lost one member, so he takes upon himself to protect the rest of you the best he can. Granted, Dru needs a bit more help than either you or Darla, what with her fits and daydreaming. 

You help him when you can, bringing back an extra child or two to keep Dru fed if she’s not up to hunting on her own. 

Spike notices your kindness, and begins spending more time with you on hunts, the two of you sometimes turning it into a friendly competition of who can get the best kill. 

He might lash out every now and then as he becomes torn for his blooming feelings for you and his loyalty to Dru, but if he’s been too harsh, you can always expect an extravagant present the next night when he returns home from feeding. 

Even after a mild tiff, you’ll receive a pretty bouquet of flowers or a small package of your favorite human food. 

He’s very pleased (and simultaneously conflicted) when you decide to stay with him and Dru even after Darla goes back to the Master.

During the Sunnydale years:

This would be the most advantageous time for you to fall in love with him. 

You’ve always been a close friend and confidant, so when he and Dru start having relationship problems, he comes to you for comfort. 

Usually when he’s deep in his cups and waxing poetic. 

But the comfort isn’t one-sided. 

When you try to reach out to Angel (he’s still your brother, and your Sire, soul or no soul, dammit), and are spurned for your efforts, Spike is there to dry away your tears and distract you with a hunt.  

The further he and Dru drift apart, the closer the two of you become, soon, he starts seeking out your company more than hers. 

After a particularly brutal argument between them, the two of you go off on a hunt and during the frenzied bloodlust, a heated kiss is shared before he comes to his senses. 

He apologizes profusely and runs off to Dru.

When Angel loses his soul, the two of you grow closer than ever.

Still spurned by your brother, this time for Dru and his grand plan, Spike confides in you of his ability to walk and you join in on his plot to stop Angel from raising Acathla.

His feelings for you grow stronger, his loyalty to Dru lessening every day. He’s still torn, but more out of duty than actual love this time.

When Dru leaves him in Brazil, he has his epiphany while talking with Angel and his Slayer. 

He realizes why Drusilla was always yammering on about him betraying her, about her no longer owning his heart. It was about you, all along.

He returns to you, begging you to forgive him.

It takes some time, but when you finally give him a chance, he goes the full nine, even pays Willy to set up the bar all romantic and pretty, with candlelight and fancy tablecloths, just to give you some semblance of a real date. 

After the date, and a fresh kill or two, those Victorian ways of his come back out. He walks you to the door of your crypt, raises your hand to his lips for a chaste kiss and bids you goodnight.

When you tug him inside with you, he actually asks if you’re sure. He had naturally assumed you would need more time, had fully planned on taking it slow.

By the time the sun rises, he laughs at himself for waiting so long to open his eyes to what his heart had been trying to tell him.

The Wolfram & Hart era:

Once he learns from Angel how strongly you reacted to the news of his death and why, Spike seeks you out whenever he’s not breathing down Fred’s neck about making him corporeal again.

He does his best to make you smile, taunting Angel all the more when you’re around. 

After the Pavayne Incident, you’re the only one who can bring him out of his funk, your presence soothing away the remaining fear of Hell. 

Once he learns to focus, the first thing he touches is your cheek, his thumb brushing away the stray tear that clings to your eyelashes.

When he’s finally solid again, he wastes no time in wrapping you in his embrace, his forehead pressing to yours as he breathes you in. 

He drags you away from the law firm as soon as the sun sets, in the Viper of course, and the two of you enjoy all that the city has to offer, soul-permitting, that is. 

He promises to help you continue to be a better vampire, knowing how hard it can be to be good without a soul. His faith in you brings a smile to your face and strengthens your resolve.

With you at his side, he no longer works as a viable pawn for Lindsay’s plot, so instead of ending up with his own apartment, he takes up residence at W&H, his mid-level suite just one door down the hall from yours.

He needles Angel to no end about the two of you, so much so that you have to rein him in nearly once a week before he gets himself dusted.

He holds you close and lets you cry the whole night through after the loss of Fred, stroking your hair and whispering gentle words of comfort till you fall asleep. 

When it comes time to go after the Senior Partners, he reluctantly accepts you being involved in the fight.

Rest assured though, once the Battle for L.A. begins in the alley, he barely lets you out of his sight, throwing himself in front of you whenever more than two or three demons are ganging up on you.

He even works with you seamlessly to take down a troll, tossing you up into the air to deliver the death blow.

Fred, Gunn, and Wesley may be gone, but at least he still has you. Even if Angel comes as part of the package. 

It takes a little wheedling, but you manage to convince him to let Illyria tag along with your little family as you go about keeping up the good fight.

Thanks for this, and I hope you like it. It really gave me a lot to think about. 

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

if you have a question about aussie slang, for a fic or whatevs, please just ask i don't know all of it, but we do have some fun words and sayings that are day to day statements

esp. the more rural you go

not everyone has the full accent though, because you do get a lot of pressure at work to come across... professional or whatever.

the only one i've never been sure of being an Actual Phrase, or if it Became A Phrase after popularisation on a tv show, is "Stone the Flaming Crows" bc a dude from Neighbours used to say it frequently.

examples of day to day stuff i can think of right now

mad as a frog in a sock (angry about something, went off, off the shits)

mad as a cut snake (usually means 'they're nuts', but can also mean they exploded with anger, usually contextual)

she'll be right (it's fine - can be a flippant statement, can be reassurance, etc)

drongo / galah - (idiot, not very smart, wanker, etc)

dunny = toilet

thunderbox/outhouse / long-drop - usually outdoor toilet

dry as a nun's nasty / dry as a dead dingo's donger (I am thirsty, or It Is Hot AF/we need rain so bad)

chuck a u-ey (do a u-turn)

Oi! (Hey I want your attention/i was surprised, general exclamation, stop that, you are in a lot of fucking trouble mate - depends on the tone of voice and volume) like "OI!" says aunty ruth has just found her dentures in jello and she knows you did it, etc

Bugger off (go away, or sometimes a statement of disbelief)

Yeah nah /Nah yeah (can mean yes, no or maybe depending on what was said directly before the statement)

you cant pull the wool over my eyes - you can't lie to me like that / i can see you are not telling the truth

shut your gob / put a sock in it / put a cork in it - (shut up / shut the FUCK up / close your mouth or i will shut it for you) depends on tone

Ya wally (you idiot)

Roo = kangaroo

o = can be affixed to anything to shorten it at the servo - gone to the service station, arvo - afternoon, smoko - morning tea, bottlo - where the grog is

goon/goonsack - wine in a box

grog - alcohol

stubbie - beer, ususally

boardies - board shorts

rashie - swimming shirt,

slip, slop, slap - ancient proverb for avoiding sunburn. singing pelican.

thongs - footwear

sheila = female / woman, don't hear this a lot at the moment tbh except in certain contexts or from specific people

'Getting rowdy' = things are heating up, people are riled up, a fight is about to/has just broken out, etc.

DJ's like a mad cunt = one very specific meme about a bad PM we had like 10 years ago. i can't tell you how many PM's ago, it's been game of thrones here lmao

Beyond the black stump / Out whoop-whoop / references to timbuktu (quite a distance away)

strewth!/crickey!/bloody hell - (exclamation of surprise, expletive replacement, etc)

flat out like a lizard drinking (tired / drunk / exhausted / sleeping)

pull a harry holt - (I've heard a dozens variations of this one, it means Go Missing / Disappear, often used as a joke. PM Holt went swimming one day and disappeared)

have a stickybeak (to poke your nose in/investigate/look around)

chuck a wobbly/throw a tanty/chuck a tanty/throw a wobbly (throw a tantrum, i have legit never seen anyone successfully deescalate a situation by telling someone not to chuck a wobbly or throw a tanty, go figure lmao)

bogan - (very specific kind of low-income, generally white, people. sort of like rednecks, but with more stereotypical aussie features like a mullet, singlet tops, sunnies, stubbies, etc. tend to fall under the liberal party ideology - who are our republicans... )

ankle-biters / rugrats / little takkers / gremlins / nippers - (kids, usually the littler ones)

tiff - argument, small fight (had a tiff, had a row)

pav = pavlova

piss/whizz/take a piss = going to pee

vegemite - delicious

Kiwi = New Zealander

Banana benders - the disrespectful bs that apparently other states call anyone living in Queensland, the wankers

station - farming areas that have sheep or livestock usually, have farmhands etc.

dole bludger(s) - (anyone on Centrelink, whether they want to be or not, with no other employment. but like, a lot of people on centrelink have a job that does not cover enough and need additional financial supports to meet a minimum wage, or are students or apprentices, etc. there are people who go on centrelink on and off to avoid engaging in the jobseeking stuff, they are the real dole bludgers, but a lot of richer people tend to call anyone on 'welfare' bludgers)

don't you come the raw prawn with me - (do not lie to me / don't try that shit with me, mate / I wasn't born yesterday /etc)

dak/dack - to dack someone is to come up behind them and yank their pants down (or skirts). Often taking out your boxers, too.)

budgie smugglers - (speedoes, male swimwear)

togs/toggs or cozzie (swimwear, any kind. cozzie = costume)

mozzie - (mosquito)

better than a kick up the backside /better than a kick in the arse - (pretty self explanatory, one of those phrases parents use to get slightly hurt kids to start laughing and/or coworkers to commisserate about new work rules, etc)

I wouldn't piss on (name) if they were on fire - (self-explanatory, you hate them, or they're a useless tit or an insufferable person /a suckup etc, and you would gladly hand them a match)

one for the road = getting a drink for the road, usually. can also make a joke of it like, "one last piss for the road" = I'm going to the bathroom before I leave

here's your handbag, what's your hurry - probs not an aussie phrase but a common joke in my family

----------------

So like, there's some words and items from Australian Indigenous culture that often get used wrong in stereotypical characters, like saying 'gone walkabout', using 'cooee', making digeridoo jokes, and making some really uncomfy 'savages' statements can be very disrespectful. You might want to go looking into Australia's fucked up policies and historical (and only recent) situations before starting any arguments about this stuff... in many ways it mirrors the cruelty of american colonisers to native american peoples, etc.

Avoid some phrases. Your character gone to cool their head? He's gone off on to soak his head, or he's on his bike (gone away) but he'll be back... You can use 'Oi, dickhead!'

Please don't mock the names of towns or places, they are often the names from the traditional custodians and inhabitants.

-----------------

Random things:

We drive on the left side of the road, driver's side reversed.

More of our cars are automatic than manual. Utes aren't atypical, but bigger vehicles are out in rural areas because more than a few of the rural roads are poorly maintained or dirt, with potholes that yoyo your soul into your body.

If you have a character on a long drive on a non-highway, or rural road: +if you are on a one-lane road and someone is comingthe other way, you both move half-on, half-off; for big vehicles or trucks, you can choose to pull off completely and stop. Just for safety, esp. in rain, fog, mist or late at night. +at one-lane bridges, you have a give way sign on one side. if you want your characters to have a moment of 'pause to look at each other while driving' or 'a quiet moment of reflection', have them wait for another car or truck to pass from the other side. These can be a few metres long, to like, a really long bridge. +They may pass markers that say 'flood level marker' with numbers of 2, 3 or 5 metres. Could be useful to remark on if your fic needs a reason for them to have a crisis. +Bushfire warning signs (from Low to Catastrophic) are frequent +Animal Crossing signs are very frequent, and often have a wildlife rescue number on them +Water restriction signs are in most small towns, they range from levels 1 to 6. This can change what the characters are allowed to do with water in little towns, etc. +You may occasionally find a small servo and one or two houses. +pubs don't open/won't serve alcohol until after 10am. the joke has always been, 'beer on your cornflakes' but you will never be able to actually get that unless you preplanned the night before in your hotel room. +Around dawn and dusk, a lot of animals like hares, kangaroos, wallabies, sometimes echidnas and koalas and little numbat things, and snakes and bushmice will be close to the road. Sometimes dashing across. They do not react logically to cars approaching, and will leap out at random. Hares do this zigzag nonsense. If you need the character to hit the brakes frantically, or swerve, this is a good reason. If you are ever driving here and see an animal on the side of the road, flip lights to low beam, slow down and watch to see how they react. If you can. If there's a truck blaring down on you, you may not be able to.

+Emus are in more rural areas. Echidnas sometimes appear on fringes of towns though.

+Kookaburras are a lovely creature, I have rescued a few and they are nice... but their laugh is very grating when it goes off super early in the morning. They eat snakes (good) and baby birds (not so good).

+Lots of snakes round here. LOTS. Carpet Snakes are pretty common, red-belly black snakes, eastern brown (big danger!!!), whip snakes have declined in my region, keelback snakes, this one black and white banded one we found deceased, etc. Snakes can climb, snakes can SWIM. Putting something that stinks around a campsite MAY help, but not always.

+Never go swimming in a dam you don't own, and that hasn't been checked, and if no one knows where you are. How deep is it? What's on the bottom? How stirred is the water? etc.

+Kangaroos CAN drown you. They have perfected this attack, and will do it to humans, dogs and other pursuers alike. They can also eviscerate you with their hind paws or shatter your ribs with a kick. The 'boxing' they do is exceptionally violent. This seems to surprise people, but like, giraffes can kill each other by slamming their heads into each other, you think a 7 ft swole motherfucking cryptid can't do harm? They can be lovely tho, if they trust you. But DO NOT GO PETTING WILDLIFE.

+Dropbears, austrilanicus vericanthus bitus, are real. We do make jokes about them, but they are a Problem. The pee on yourself thing won't ward them off, that's more about working out which tourists are the most gullible (and if they run with it, the moistest) lmao. Akubras and other thicker-layered headwear,

+We have wild dogs and feral pigs. Do not fuck with the feral pigs, some are HUGE, and no... they're not just pigs who escaped farms, these are MASSIVE motherfuckers who will Get You if they See You. Rustling in the night outside the tent? Good Luck.

+Koalas should not be picked up directly. They have claws, and a lot of them have chamydia. I mean if a character saves one in a fic that's fine I guess, but like... someone's getting antibiotics after that lmao. They are bigger than you think, dumber than you think, and sometimes they have to be chased across a highway with a windscreen cover bc they're not very bright and keep failing to climb metal fences, lmaoooo

+Towns of about 20-30k will have more shops (some franchise, some local owned), servos, fast food places and usually at least two to three shopping centres. Usually small level entertainments like a cinema, or local groups. +Towns with 10-20k, may have one or two major shopping centres, servos (tracks and RVs catered to), possibly a maccas, and the majority of stores will be local-owned. May have a cinema, but not one that has the newest releases. Local council may have more festivals, or 'that one thing they're known for'. +0-10k towns have a small local store, prices usually a bit higher. A servo, often with capacity for trucks. Local festivals. Characters can cop a bit of side-eye in these places, esp. if they don't fit the traditional ideas or are loud/violently american. +Grey nomads are a thing. Old people with fancy caravans who drive So Slow, and move all around aus. Several refused to stop during covid and it was like, WHO DO YOU THNK WE'RE TRYING TO KEEP ALIVE BY STOPPING YOU MOVING THROUGH MULTIPLE TOWNS???

+Some rural areas have legit red dirt, its always super cool to look at. Some places have light brown to dark brown, some have more chalky colours or yellowish dirt. Depends.

+Reminder: Australia has very specific gun laws, if your character/s have weapons then they may need to be sneaky or store them specifically in the vehicle. Although if you're talking about like, mad max type rules, then who cares. But if you have them get into a gun fight in a town, the police will come, etc.

Dunno, just ask if you have a question... just trying to think of random things to paint a picture if you have a character over here for a roadtrip or mission or whatever.

[fanficwriter284]

chucky being insecure bout how skinny he is and tiff comforting him only if ur comfortable writing this ofcc

"WAIT! IF YOU CONSIDER CHUCK SKINNY? THEN WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MAKE ME!?"

...

Haha I'm just teasing! And sure why not. I'm assuming you're referring to when he was first human! I hope you all enjoy! And if you guys want more HC's or Fics let me know!

Spring had begun to roll into the city of Chicago, meaning it was the city dwellers time to shine, exchanging baggy warm clothing from loose thin attire. Chucky wasn’t never fond of the warmer climate, as it was difficult to wear his trench coats, long sleeves, and jackets, for he would burst into an oil mess of sweat. He found them a perfect way to give off an extra sense of mass and bulk to combat his wiry exterior. Chucky found himself staring his body down in a mirror, and couldn’t help feeling exposed with the lack of layers, even a tad bit vulnerable much to his dismay. No matter how much he tried to mask it, his usual confident careless demeanor faltered. He found himself grabbing at his arms feeling a hard bone underneath his skin. He tried to stop himself but couldn’t, continuing to stare at his smaller frame. It reminded him of when he was younger….weaker….he blamed his birth mother for his thin build. The woman couldn’t be bothered to even hold nor nurse her own son in his early stages, resulting in various doctor visits in his childhood regarding his weak immune system, and compared to his twin he was the runt, despite being the older one. When he did manage to eat his body could only sustain half a plateful, if he ate anything more his body would reject the excess. 

Tiffany took notice of her boyfriend's fixated stare, and his constant fidgeting. Something was off. 

“Sweetface…You okay?” she whispered, snaking her arms around his narrow waist. She raised a curious brow feeling him tense a tad bit.

Her touch pulled him back to the present, snapping him from his voided trance.

“Fine Tiff…Just thinking that’s all…”

She wasn’t buying it, leaning further her hands making their way to his and up his arms, where she felt him tense once more, before pulling him into a hug. 

“Doesn’t seem like it…What’s wrong?” she questioned twirling a loose strand of his hair around her finger. 

Chucky lowered his head, sighing, “Do you think I’m skinny Tiff?”

“I prefer the term slim fit” she responded, giving him another squeeze.

The phase got a faint chuckle out of him, that lasted half a second before his face sank once more, “Seriously Tiff”

Tiffany gave a faint sigh, leaning closer, “Well yeah, but there’s nothing wrong with that Sweetface, you’re perfect the way you are”

“Please” he retorted, “My ass looks like a fucking toothpick”

Tiffany pulled him in closer, resting her chin on his neck, “Sweetface do you think a toothpick could’ve torn that man’s jaw off last night?” she whispered, stroking his side. 

“no”

“Or break a man’s arm making it look like nothing?”

“...No”

“Or make each night unforgettable?”

Chucky blushed a bit letting out a slight grin, “No”

Tiffany smiles, pulling away and stepping in front of him, pulling his face closer to hers.

“Then you’re not a toothpick,” she said, pulling him in for a tender kiss. 

Chucky leaned into her cupping the side of her cheek with a rare softness only a few have ever experienced 

“Thanks Tiff”

“You’re welcome”

[marvelmaniac715]

This is part one of a series I like to call ‘If Chucky had Reddit’. Each post will cover a different movie or season of his show, this fic is about Child’s Play One.

————————————————————-

e/Throwawaydollcrisis:

r/AITA:

AITA For Kidnapping a Woman and Tying Her Up in a Secret Apartment My Girlfriend Doesn’t Know About?:

I (33M) have always wanted a big family. I’ve wanted kids since I was a little boy, and I’ve wanted a wife ever since I learnt about the concept of love and marriage.

My girlfriend (29F) and I haven’t been able to conceive a child, and honestly, I can’t see myself with her in the long-term. We share some common interests, but she’s starting to grate on my nerves a tad, and she’s not really that pretty if you really look at her.

A few months ago I met a woman who I’ll call Sophia. Sophia (30F) was beautiful, and she had the most adorable little girl who we’ll call Bella. I fell in love with this woman almost immediately, and Bella looked like she could be my daughter, and I knew that this was the family I’d been waiting for. Unfortunately, she was married, and heavily pregnant. But I’m a decent guy, I’m willing to step up and raise both of these babies with Sophia, all I had to do was get her husband out of the way.

After the funeral, I approached Sophia and asked her out on a date. I wanted to take it slow, she was still grieving after all, even if he wasn’t good for her. But apparently, I’d misinterpreted friendly conversation as flirtation, but I was in too deep by now.

I kidnapped her there and then and brought her to an abandoned apartment near a toy store. She struggled a lot and tried to escape, so I had to tie her down for her own safety. I went to pick up Bella from daycare and when I came back Sophia was crying and said that I was an asshole.

I think she just needs time to accept her situation, but what do you think, Reddit? AITA?

————————————————————-

Comments:

BrideofPsychostein: WTF? I know exactly who you are you cheating bastard, stay right the fuck where you are, you’re gonna get a little visit from a close friend of ours. You just wait until I give Mikey a call, you’re in so much trouble, mister!

Reply - Throwawaydollcrisis: I swear to God Tiff, you always take this shit too far. This is why I’m leaving you, honestly, you can be such a bitch over something so unimportant, it’s ridiculous.

Skeptic372: Is this a joke post? This sub is for serious posts only…

Reply - Throwawaydollcrisis: Shut up, it’s serious. Doubt me again and I’ll slit your throat. I know where you live, asshole, your location’s in your bio, idiot.

EveryDayBatman: Just got an anonymous tip old Charlie boy, get ready.

Reply - Throwawaydollcrisis: oh shit.

————————————————————-

e/Throwawaydollcrisis:

r/AskReddit:

Hypothetically, could I transfer my soul into a doll?:

That’s just a hypothetical, but say… I was bleeding out in a toy store. No humans nearby, could I go into a doll? I mean, they’re human looking, right? Specifically I’m talking about one of those new Good Guy dolls. Please respond quick cause I don’t know how long I have left. Until curiosity gets the better of me, nothing else I swear.

Update: 

Never mind, I solved the problem myself, thanks for nothing, guys. Really means a lot, y’know?

————————————————————-

e/TheGoodKaren:

r/dolls:

I’m so sorry if this comes off as rude or impossible, but does anyone know where I can get a Good Guy doll, preferably in the next eight hours?:

Please let me explain. I’m a single mother on a relatively low income, I have a little boy who’s six today, and it would make his day to have his new favourite thing as his very own on his special day. I’m really beating myself up over not having one now, but by the time he wanted one I’d already spent all the money I’d saved for presents and it was too close to his birthday. I’ve managed to find $50 in case anybody is willing to sell, please help me make my little boy’s birthday wishes come true. 

————————————————————

Comments:

Magpie: Karen, is that you? You should have just asked, I know a guy in a nearby neighbourhood who’s selling one! I’ll take you there after work, we wouldn’t want to mess up the little tyke’s birthday now would we?

Reply - TheGoodKaren: Oh Maggie, you’re a lifesaver! Thank you, you’re the best friend ever!

————————————————————

e/Throwawaydollcrisis:

r/AskReddit:

Should I pretend that I was sent down from heaven by a dead kid’s father so that he’ll play along with my plans?:

This is a really important question, don’t let me down this time.

————————————————————-

Comments:

TheGoodKaren: Uh, I have a six year old son, and speaking as a mother, that is a horrible thing to do, op.

Reply - Throwawaydollcrisis: Shut up you stupid bitch, I already hate you, don’t make it worse.

MellowYellowVibes: I’m a child psychologist, and it can be really damaging to a child’s mental development if they’re lied to in such a way. I suggest you don’t do this, op.

Reply - Throwawaydollcrisis: Why is this sub filled with idiots?

————————————————————-

e/Throwawaydollcrisis:

r/voodoo:

Can you kill a person with their voodoo doll?

————————————————————-

e/TheGoodKaren:

r/LegalAdvice:

Can a six year old boy go to prison on suspected murder charges?:

My best friend died recently, she was babysitting my little boy and he was the only one home. She fell out of my apartment’s window onto a truck below. 

My son swears he didn’t do it and that his new Good Guy doll killed her. The cops are getting concerned and I don’t want to lose my son. Could I perhaps plead insanity and get him off with a lighter sentence?

————————————————————-

Comments:

Truthisoutthere666: Trust the boy, it’s the doll. Check it later for yourself.

Reply - TheGoodKaren: Okay, I’ll do that later then…

ElectricDoc: I’m a child psychologist, Karen, the head child psychologist for your area. I think that perhaps your son should come and stay in my facility for a while, where we can heal his troubled mind. He wouldn’t be considered a criminal and could one day go on to live an ordinary life.

Reply - TheGoodKaren: I hate the thought of not seeing my son for so long, but if it’s what I have to do to keep him safe I’ll do it.

————————————————————-

e/Throwawaydollcrisis: 

r/fashion:

Do trench coats and leather jackets look good on six year old boys?

————————————————————-

e/Throwawaydollcrisis:

r/LegalAdvice:

What’s the legal age to drink and smoke in the US?

————————————————————-

e/TheGoodKaren:

r/dolls:

Good Guy question:

Hi, sorry, me again. Are the new Good Guy dolls supposed to work without their batteries? I got one for my son a few days ago and it seemed to work fine, but I was just about to throw out it’s box today and realised that the batteries were still inside the packaging. Is that meant to happen?

————————————————————-

Comments:

Guest224: Speaking as a doll collector who’s recently finished stocking up on at least three of all of the different name varieties for this doll, no. Your doll must be a defect. Did you buy it from a reputable source?

Reply - TheGoodKaren: Uh, no. Should I be concerned then?

————————————————————-

e/TheGoodKaren:

r/LegalAdvice:

Is it counted as murder or manslaughter if you kill a sentient children’s toy?

————————————————————-

r/news:

“Chucky did it.” Andy Barclay aged six from New Jersey claims that his prized Good Guy doll is behind recent murders in his local area:

His mother supports his delusions, and claims that her son is telling the truth. Local eye witnesses report sightings of a short figure with long red hair in striped overalls reminiscent of the popular toy being seen near the crime scenes, and ‘Chuckymania’ has swept the neighbourhood into a frenzy.

————————————————————-

Comments:

IronaYitz: Hey, am I the only one who thinks that this would make a great horror movie?

DonMancini: I’d totally make it. I’m gonna see if I can get my friend Brad Dourif to star in it.