#GOOGLE ASSISTANT

[cupcakeshakesnake]

Vaguely threatening Google Assistant screenshots saved on my phone.

[samo64]

Here are a bunch of some random computer memes

[speedierthanasubmarine]

Finished heaven official’s blessing and I really enjoyed writing an analysis on helluva boss I want to make this a regular thing because it’s fun so here’s my thoughts on

Heaven Official’s Blessing

Spoilers (duh)

I think it’s incredibly impressive when someone can make an overarching narrative in which different seemingly disjointed events are significant without A) putting a giant exclamation mark on top saying “REMEMBER THIS IT WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER” and B) Significantly over or under emphasizing the importance of the scene in the moment. Each event stood on its own and I liked that.

There were several janky sentences and word choices but that’s a translation issue, this writer clearly knows what she’s doing.

Characters were a lot of fun and distinct, my favorites were Feng Xin, Pei Ming, Qi Ying, and Ling Wen whenever they were on the page I was like Ah yes, these pages are gonna be enjoyable and I was right, they’re all delightful (cept the brocade immortal stuff, but like I don’t care, Google assistant is fun) Xie Lian and San Lang are delightful, love them, and San Lang is so effed in the head it’s enjoyable to try and imagine what unhinged thing he’ll do next

Tbh there isn’t much plot breakdown I want to do with this series because it knows what it is, it’s a fanfic ass book with good times, trauma, gay fluff, and fights. Need I say more? That’s not a detractor, it’s a strength. Be what you are and own it because a house with a house’s foundation is a great house but slap a building on that house’s foundation and it fails in both regards.

The only aspect I’m going to analyze is the narrative voice the books are written in because holy crap is it super impressive. Xie Lian is a super mature (or ditzy, depending on your point of view) character, he doesn’t dwell on things, doesn’t hold grudges, doesn’t really care that much about people’s histories or even their present, doesn’t focus much on externals and it comes through in the way the book is written. I noticed this when throughout the books San Lang would do fucked up stuff like make it rain blood and kill a pit’s worth of people and Xie Lian kinda didn’t really seem to care and at first it pissed me off, why isn’t the author letting consequences occur because of these peoples’ actions, but then as it held consistently throughout the book and other people kept being super concerned about stuff, like Pei Constantly asking after Shi Qingxuan (I don’t know how to spell their name, it’s so hard to keep track I’m so sorry) or people bringing up Banue, I realized this is just Xie Lian, other people in the book are regular people like me, this one guy is just experiencing things, going “Well, ain’t that something” and then just moving on. Honestly iconic, but also I was halfway through book six when I realized. Especially since whenever they do flashbacks Xie Lian does all normal stuff. He describes settings he’s in, he mentions events that happened a few pages ago, he tells the reader how he feels, it’s after he experiences all his shit he goes through that this all kinda slips away. In “present” scenes he’ll reference things as they come up but like in the flashback after Mu Qing leaves they talk about it a few times and I find that aspect of acknowledgment to be noticeably absent in the “present” scenes. After the black water arc there is a complete lack of discussion about the frankly trauma inducing event that just transpired but sure Cie Lian, you and San Lang have to not hold hands for the billionth time. At first I thought is this author high but then I realized what shes doing is characterizing through prose which is IMPRESSIVE AS HELL. This may be a point I noticed and am now misremembering the entire series just to bolster my take and if that’s the case then I shall sheepishly shrug and say I’m sorry. I’m not rereading 8 books to write a tumblr review. Maybe if I ever start a YouTube channel

I don’t know, I just find it to be an incredible feat of actually good writing when a story is being told through the lens of the main character and you can characterize that character by simply reading the story and seeing how it’s written, not even through dialogue and action. It’s kinda like the Great Gatsby or a Separate Peace, and it’s super cool that a book like this can accomplish the same thing that makes those classics great. There isn’t as much symbolism or analytical potential but those books wouldn’t be nearly as impactful as they were without great execution, which this book pulled off in spades.

[the0verboss]

Asked my husband to grab me a roll of toilet paper (cause heyoo the roll was empty) and he said no, but the Google AI heard me and was like "ok I'll be right back"

...excuse me?

And now I can't stop thinking about a random man from Google bursting into my house to hand me a roll of toilet paper. And he probably wouldn't have pelted me in the head with it like my husband did the little shit.

[enbyorge]

Dear Google, under no circumstances will I ever be returning Google Assistant's permissions.

I cannot use GA, I require another human person to activate my Talking Mode, using GA requires me to speak, and GA does not allow me mental access to Talking Mode. GA is useless to me for reasons you, Google, cannot possibly solve.

Stop telling me I "forgot to activate Google Assistant". I manually removed those permissions, on purpose. Stop. Asking.

Honestly, I kind of assumed that removing permissions would also remove the permission to send notifications when I also, separately, disabled those several times.

[turquoisedata]

Err, thanks? That's... not what I was after though tbh

[calscompositions]

just browsed through both the google assistant tag and the siri tag and found absolutely no google assistant x siri content despite the fact that google is LITERALLY RUNNING AN AD CAMPAIGN WHERE THE TWO ARE BESTIES

disappointed in this website

[neoruby-loves-ut-aus]

Happy B-Day to the Apple brothers 🍎🍎

The brothers belong to @jokublog

They're now 507 yrs old 😀😀😀 (I did math by doing 2016-500 and it came 1516 which means that time the Apple incident happened and 500 + 7)

Bonus, Google assistant gave me these answers:

When I searched for black apple:

When I searched for golden apple in which country (to check whether it exists or not):

[airconditioningbob]

[mysterymessmachine]

what would you do if you said out loud "that's so sad. Alexa, play despacito" and your Google assistant activated and said "sorry I can't be her"

[just-a-little-bit-of-sugar]

When I say "ok google, goodnight" the google turns off my bedside lamp, and it used to say "goodnight, *name*" but now it just says "goodnight" is it mad at me

[celiaelise]

I asked Google assistant if it could do my dishes for me, and it said I needed to set up permissions for that in the app.

[avaganda]

A Vintage / Retro Bush Radio Retrofitted with a Google Voice Assistant and Bluetooth. If you would like one, or would like something upgrade some broken or existing vintage equipment, please contact me for comissions!

[speedierthanasubmarine]

Some stuff I sent to my friend while reading book 5, I am a national treasure.

[onepawproductions]

Working on Chapter 14 of The Muddy Princess, by Colubrina!

It's been a journey, figuring out how to get the Perfect RTX Broadcast Noise Cancellation out of the Ai. I apparently have a specific frequency in my voice that Ai doesn't like, lol.

So I tend to get artifacts around P's and H's, especially when doing a higher pitched British Female Voice.

Hear the artifact at the end? I sure do! Annoying little squealing noise...

On a side note, Google Nest and Google Assistant have trouble hearing me too. Sometimes I'll have to drop an entire register, so I sound like Batman Lite, asking for the kitchen lights to turn off, ha

Downloading Voxal, and using it before RTX Broadcast to drop frequencies under 100hz, and over 2000hz helps a lot, though. Whew!

[canadiancryptid]

I just tried to ask google who voiced Fink in OK KO because I thought she sounded familiar, and uh-

it misheard me and now I'm scared