What was going through Cooper Howard’s head as his nose necrotized, and his skin mottled, and he lost himself and everything he ever stood for one act at a time.
This is the finished version of my original prompt, inspired by the official fallout ghoul transformation progression poster. What did Cooper look like after the bombs fell, after he lost his daughter? After he began to forsake every value he ever treasured. After he made his first kill in the wasteland? Did he ever wake gasping from nightmares where he lost his daughter all over again? Cooper didn’t lose his morality overnight. It hurt.
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he's beauty
he's grace
(he's plotting tax evasion, according to my best friend)
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Sorry, most likely my memory being poor, but I thought Malleus' mom (don't know how to spell her name and too lazy to check how to spell it) was already an adult when Lilia ""proposed""?? Like I was always under the assumption that it was like a one-sided child crush on somebody completely out of your league you tend to have as a kid 💀
I don't think they say how old she was? although it's entirely possible I just misunderstood; my Japanese is...shaky. :') the actual line is "幼い頃に私に求婚したのは偽りか?", which I read as "isn't it true that you proposed to me as a kid?", and took as her being older than him, but not necessarily an adult (like, I was thinking of Lilia as being not quite a preteen and Mel being preteen/young teen). although I don't know if there's a connotation or something I'm missing that implies a bigger age gap, if that makes sense!
(and of course, I might also just be forgetting some other line -- if someone else knows, then please correct me! I need to know which headcanons need adjusting 👀)
BUT YEAH in a canon-y sense, Malleus is 178 and around the third-years developmentally. which makes me think that even though dragons have a way longer lifespan, they go through childhood at about the same rate as most fae (or at least the kind that Lilia is) and just kinda...slow waaaaay down once they hit adulthood. so it makes sense in my brain that he and Meleanor could've basically grown up together!
...it makes it angstier that way, anyway. :)
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Even if Mickey had never come back, none of Ian’s relationships in the show or even after would’ve worked out long term because Mickey is the only person that truly knows Ian and he’s the only one that Ian could ever truly be himself around.
Ian changed himself to fit into a mold of what he felt Caleb & Trevor wanted. He wanted to hide the ugly parts of his life from them. To Ian, these shiny new relationships that were separated from the South Side and his past, were a way to hide those ugly parts of his life from himself. He wanted to move on from his past and every thing that happened in seasons 4 and 5. And he also wanted a better life for himself than what he’d had, because Ian’s always been ambitious and always wanted a way out from where he was. To Ian, a relationship with a “normal” guy who didn’t grow up like him was a way to do that.
But because of this he was never his full true self around them. He was always just playing a part for them (and himself) and keeping the things he wanted hidden, hidden. Through that he was able to hide things from himself too.
But Mickey grew up with him. Mickey’s life was just as messy, if not more so, than Ian’s. He understands Ian better than anyone. He saw first hand all the messy parts of Ian and still loved him. Even with all his insecurities that stemmed from his diagnosis, Ian never felt like he had to hide himself or change himself around Mickey. He was always just himself.
Even though it’s Mickey who says “I don’t do normal, Gallagher,” the truth is - neither does Ian. A “normal” relationship never would’ve satisfied Ian long term.
If Mickey had never come back Ian would’ve continued to do this with every new guy he dated and they all eventually would’ve ended because of this. Mickey is the only person that he doesn’t have to act with. He’s always able to just be himself.
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