someone killed mage
......what...?
.......
Y-you're joking.... you're joking, he's not dead!! He's my brother, I know him too well, he would never let himself die!!
This is some sort of sick prank isn't it!?
........
....Bob... Bob will know where he is... I'm going to Bob.....
*They walk away*
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“I’m not vegan because of the cruel conditions of agricultural workers” and what about the slaughter workers who are struggling with ptsd? or the people in their household dealing with the violence they bring home? or the workers who go home and attempt to end their literal lives because of the graphic violence they enact daily? you don’t support amazon because of it’s cruel working conditions, yet slaughterhouse workers experience the exact same, if not far worse. you don’t go vegan because of the poor treatment towards people picking vegetables or growing quinoa, yet you don’t solely live off of meat and dairy and are buying unethically sourced vegetables anyways? why would you cause harm to both slaughterhouse workers and vegetable agriculture workers when you could reduce one of them to 0?
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I had a dream that taylor swift released a new album that employed her most despicable marketing move yet: she promised that new joanna newsom songs were buried as hidden easter eggs within the ends of her other songs, but every time a new jnew song was about to play, it would simply skip to her next track. a disgusting display of capitalist trickery. naturally, i had no choice but to listen.
now, this album of hers, like most of her creative output, played it extremely safe to appeal to the widest possible commercial audience, wherein she deployed inane similes such as “clear like crystal” and “red like a rose.”
however, one song that was clearly controversial, but only in ways taylor herself was too obtuse and tone deaf to realize, was her ballad “sleep in the middle east,” which argued that being with her “middle eastern” lover signified an act of decentralization of global imperialist powers that locationally designate the region as being “the middle east” within a complex political/geographic framework, as when they are together, their love is what becomes central to our cosmological paradigms.
the title comes from her line in the chorus “I get no sleep in the middle east,” to imply that she is either wide awake tossing and turning over her lover, or that they are too busy staying up all night having freasknasty dominatrix and/or tame vanilla sex (I can only assume that with t-swift it’s only one or the other).
aside from the obvious glaring problematics of composing such a song in the first place, some other lines are also suspect in subtler ways. for example, her opening line, “why does bombay feel so different from mumbai” is clearly her gesturing towards the idea that every city in the middle east feels so locationally specific due to the nature of experiencing it with her lover, whereas she feels “no different going to france or congo.”
the keen-eared listener will immediately notice many issues here. first of all, she is listing cities in india, a country that is not part of the middle east in even the most generous estimation. secondly, bombay cannot possibly feel “so different” from mumbai, as they are, in fact, the same city. i also have a hard time believing that taylor did not notice a difference between “france and congo” (a line she rhymes with “let’s go to a place that only we know”), or, frankly, that she has ever set foot in the drc.
it was clear by the nature of this song that taylor did not expect to receive any flak for this harmless tune, and in fact i believe she expected to receive praise for finally (alluding to) dating her first ethnic. however, as you can imagine, her detractors had a field day tearing apart this song, myself included, which is why i am now reporting back from my dream world to deliver my somnial findings to all of you.
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marcus licinius crassus & his sons
hey do you guys ever think about how crassus' father and brothers died, leaving him the surviving son, and then the tragedy repeats with marcus jr (with his father and brother dying at carrhae)
anyway, tfw you tell your brother not to do reckless shit when you're not around, and he immediately goes off and does All Of That the second he arrives in gaul. what do you MEAN there was a hostage crisis. what the fuck.
The Sons of Crassus, Ronald Syme
Publius Crassus - ‘optimus adulescens’ and his unfortunate career, Ireneusz Łuć
Pompeius Trogus, in the epitome of Justin, 42.4.6
society6 | ko-fi | twitter (pillowfort, cohost) | deviantart
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