#Hurt Pidge

[icypantherwrites]

Was hoping to be able to ask this on anon because I’m shy haha, but my favorite character was Pidge and I absolutely love your writing and was wondering if there was a compilation of any of your Pidge-centric works anywhere? I was super into Voltron years ago and now there are. A lot of fics to sort through 😅 no pressure or anything, just curious to know if there is something like that!!!

Sorry about the anon asks, but I had to turn them off as too many people used them to send me really awful messages (as you can see below they still do it on AO3 >>) and I just couldn't deal with that any more.

To your query though, I actually used to try to keep an updated archive of all my works sorted by character on Tumblr and embarrassingly I cannot find it (but it hasn't been updated since at least 2021 so it's super outdated), so I've done my best to remember all of my Pidge-centric works (most she's the whumpee, but some she's just heavily involved in the story/Pidge emotional angst or character-centric or Pidge&another character relationship moment) but I hope this might help. There's a few unmentioned type "snippet fics" from my Patreon that exist but are not listed as no summary for them. If you check any of them out and have a moment would love to hear from you in the comments on the fic what you thought ♥

In no particular order:

Human Nature -- this is a series of the following three works:

What it Means to be Human: Pidge had always taken pride in the fact she’d been told her mind was like a machine. She just… Never expected to find out that it actually was. Or; Alternate Universe Fic where Pidge discovers she’s an android and begins a journey to find what being human really means.

Interlude: What Makes Us Different (But Also Human): Where Pidge and Keith discuss what about their heritages of android and Galran are the same, different, and discover how truly human they actually are.

Made With Love Pidge has come to terms with the fact she is an android, but she still has questions. And the only people that can answer them are the ones who have known her for her entire life. It’s time to find both Matt and her dad and learn the truth about what happened to her.

"I Am a Fighter"

Summary: The Galra capture Pidge and present her with a choice. Either she makes the weapon they want… or someone dies. Pidge prides herself on her genius, on her logic. But this? This is not a choice. This is torture. She’s being forced to decide if the universe’s fate outweighs the lives of a few individuals and no one, no one, should be allowed to make that call. She has to though. Again and again.

But when a familiar face is dragged before her she can feel her resolve crumbling. Because Keith is not a nameless prisoner. He is her friend, her family. And yet his blood is already dripping from her hands.

A Broken Arm For a Broken Soul 

Summary: Shiro is breaking. Pidge can see it: the exhaustion, the pain, and the growing, splintering cracks. And while Pidge doesn’t know how to fix broken people she does know how to fix broken things. And Shiro’s prosthetic arm the Galra forced upon him is a broken thing. She doesn’t know how much it will help, but… but maybe, if she can fix that then Shiro won’t be quite so broken anymore.

A Needed Distraction

Summary: Mini fic of Lance giving gifts to each team member, Pidge's chapter :)

Koala Hugs (Patreon Exclusive)

Summary: They’d been told that the guest houses were supposed to keep them safe from the deadly low temperatures of the planet. And while for Pidge that is indeed the case, she learns it’s not so for Lance as she’s awoken by a projection of pure terror from the Blue Lion, who can sense her Paladin dying. And now as Pidge hurries to Lance’s guest house and finds him so so cold and still, she can only hope she’s not too late.

Battle Scar

Summary: Scars can cut deep and not just physically into the skin. Pidge finds herself forced to confront a memory when Lance catches sight of a scar she had previously kept hidden. But maybe… maybe this is for the best.

Always 

Summary: Pidge and Lance are on an undercover mission to retrieve supplies they desperately need for their journey back to Earth. Despite the odds everything seems to be going in their favor; Lance is charming the local gang and Pidge is hidden away as backup and they are this close to calling it a success.

And then everything goes wrong.

Not only are the gang members now hunting them, Lance has been poisoned and its affecting his memory. Pidge somehow has to keep them both alive until rescue comes, a feat made more difficult by the minute as Lance forgets first short term details, then the mission, and now... now he’s forgotten her. But no matter what happens Pidge knows she’ll protect Lance and he will protect her. Always.

Pidge + Stitches (Patreon Exclusive)

Summary: “Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”

The question came out shriller than Pidge wanted but she wasn’t able to ask it any other way as Keith lit a fucking huge metal needle on fucking fire that he planned to put through her skin next to her.

Stardust:  In You and In Me (Patreon Exclusive)

Summary: Pidge is so tired. She can’t sleep though, not until she finds something. Her family is out there, but no matter how hard she tries, no matter how hard she searches, she can’t find them. The universe is just too big. Coran gently disagrees.

Crash and Burn 

Summary: Lance and Pidge crash the supply pod following a freak asteroid storm. And Lance... Lance is hurt. Badly. He's bleeding out and there's no time to wait for rescue. Pidge has to save him. And the emergency flare... Well, it's the only thing she's got.

Red Where it Belongs (Patreon Exclusive)

Summary: How much blood, Pidge faintly wondered, had she lost now? What percentage? The human body couldn’t lose more than forty percent of its blood before death occurred and hypovolemic shock symptoms started around fifteen percent.   She stared at her blood covered hands, at the puddle growing around her, feeling the way everything was going numb and made her guess.   At least twenty percent.   Twenty percent more to go.

Ready to Be a Dragon - (Patreon Exclusive)

Summary:  Lance is a Shifter. He’s familiar with many forms, has his favorites, but there’s one that stands above the rest: a dragon. And with Pidge’s magic that dream has now come true. But what should have been a perfect day of soaring through the skies with Pidge to celebrate his new form comes to a screeching halt when a band of soldiers spots them and wants the glory of slaying a dragon. And even though Lance isn’t technically a dragon… they aren’t going to take no for an answer.

Birthday Wishes

Summary: Pidge blinked. She blinked again. The date remained the same. Today… today Matt would be twenty-five. Her eyes widened with horror. Was, she frantically corrected herself. Matt was twenty-five today. Because he was alive. He had to be.

A Day at the Beach 

Summary: A day at the beach takes a terrifying turn when Pidge falls victim to a deadly allergic reaction. Now the only question that remains is what will kill her first: anaphylaxis or the ocean?

Break It 

Summary: Don’t be scared, Pidge told herself. That was the most important thing. The constant clanking and tugging and crying all around her was very detrimental to that plan. So too were the shackles digging into her ankles and wrists, linking her to every other person on the chain of slaves, that sent her constantly stumbling as they abruptly stopped and started.

Chase Away the Nightmares

Summary: Pidge is hurt. She’s hurt bad. And yet there’s nothing much Lance and Hunk can do. They’re stranded in the middle of a warzone on a hostile planet and help isn’t coming for a long while. No matter what though they will protect Pidge. They’ll keep her from further harm; from the aliens, from injury and even from her own nightmares as her head wound blurs reality and fiction. And maybe, hopefully, soon the nightmare will be over for them all.

Plummet 

Summary: They’re dangling off of a cliff where falling means certain death. And while Shiro’s grip is strong on Pidge’s hand the cliff face is weak. And now time has finally run out.

Scavenger Hunt

Summary: The team has returned to the Space Mall but shopping isn’t what’s on Lance and Pidge’s minds. They’ve got something better planned: a scavenger hunt. It’s a battle of the stealthiest and Lance is the cool ninja sharpshooter so he’s got this in the bag. Right…?

As the World Falls Down Around Us 

Summary: Ever since Pidge revealed she was a girl her team seems to have become a bunch of overprotective, overbearing idiot males and it’s pissing her off. She’s still the same person and more than capable of taking care of herself. But in her determination to prove herself independent she winds up injured. Badly. She can handle it on her own though. She doesn’t need their help.

But hiding her injury has dire consequences and now it’s not just her freedom at stake but her life.

And Lance’s.

The world is falling down literally and figuratively around them and Pidge realizes she can’t save him alone. She needs help. Lance’s help. And as dire as the situation is there’s almost something optimistic about being trapped at the bottom: the only place to go is up.

Now if they can only reach it before time runs out.

Finding the Light (series of following two fics, TW for rape)

Sit Beside You: "I'm fine," Pidge repeated, as though trying to convince both herself and Lance. "I am. Nothing's wrong. I'm okay. I…" Her hands were trembling and she tucked them beneath her arms in the most pathetic looking hug Lance had ever seen. "I'm fine. It's over. I'm fine. Not a mark. So nothing happened. I'm fine." / Pidge is not fine. None of them are. But hopefully, eventually, they will be.

Right, Wrong and the Normal In Between: Pidge didn’t want to think about it. She knew better now than to deny that it had happened or that she was fine but all she wants is for things to be normal again. But normal is a concept that keeps getting further away. Pidge realizes just how far out of reach it is when she freezes in battle and memories distort reality. Everything is wrong. Nothing is right. But Allura doesn’t think it’s so black and white. There are a lot of steps in between and she’s going to help Pidge walk that path and find her way once more.

Rivers Stain the Ocean - (Patreon Exclusive)

Summary: When Lance messes with Pidge’s color coding system the only thing to do is retaliate in kind.   So she dyes him completely blue.   It’s harmless though, will wear off in a few days, and the experience will teach Lance to never touch her stuff again. A win-win if Pidge does say so herself.   Except for the part where the planet they visit the following day to form an alliance has this whole thing about a prophecy and being cursed and deceived by a being of blue. And in order to save both their planet and Voltron...   They’re going to kill Lance.

What Makes a Team

Summary: Lance has been feeling a little lonely of late. Allura’s off with Lotor, Shiro’s been keeping busy on his own and Hunk and Pidge are wrapped up in this whole “Team Punk” concept that has them holed up for hours in the lab. So when he’s invited to accompany the two geniuses on a resource gathering mission he couldn’t be happier and plans to make the best of it.

And then everything goes wrong.

They’re trapped, injured, and if blood loss doesn’t get Lance first then suffocation definitely will. They need a plan but Hunk is down for the count and Lance knows he’s no good for coming up with something of that caliber. But his team needs him and he’s got to think of something. Otherwise… this cave is about to become a tomb.

Inches From Death

Summary: Being captured by the Galra is a lot less frightening than Pidge thought it would be. It’s boring, really. Well, until Lance slowly starts suffocating to death inches from her and she can do nothing to save him. Now… Now it’s terrifying.

A Squeak in the Code 

Summary: Despite the late hour Pidge has no plans to sleep until she finishes running her current algorithm. Four determined little space mice have a very different plan in mind.

Crimson Shock 

Summary: What should have been a routine mission takes a terrifying turn when Pidge is injured. She’s trying not to be scared because it’ll make Hunk more so and she needs him not to be but it hurts so much and the world is growing dark and she is so so scared.

Give Me a Sign

Summary: Matt isn’t sure why he was targeted for a ransom request. He wasn’t a nobody in the Rebels but he wasn’t a somebody either. What did these aliens think the Coalition would offer for him? But as the transmission turned on Matt got his answer. Because those weren’t Rebels on the screen. It was Katie.

Heavy is the Toll of War (series of following two fics)

The Cost of Winning: "The Blue and Green Paladins serve no purpose to the Empire," the Galran commander smirked at his bound captives. "And as such you have no use except as arena fodder." He chuckled. "Give us a good show before you die." / Lance is determined to protect Pidge and save her from the arena. She will not die here. Over his dead body. Hopefully it's not quite that literal of a promise.

The Price of Peace: They may have escaped the arena but things back home are far from all right. Keith is struggling. Shiro is hiding. Lance is suffering violent flashbacks and she's having nightmares too. It's wrong. It's all wrong. Pidge hates it. She wants her space family back. Not this broken version of them. It looks like she's just going to have to fix it. And Lance is going to help.

Over the Edge (my very first VLD fanfic ever :))

Summary: It was supposed to be a simple nature hike. What it turned into was anything but. And now Pidge and Lance are just hoping they can make it back alive.

"Pidge!" came a scream. And before she could even process that she was falling, that she was going to die, a dark hand shot over the edge and wrapped bruisingly about her wrist, but she had never been so grateful to be in pain. Lance's panicked face met hers, although there was a steely glint of determination that so, so many overlooked. "I've got you," he panted, throwing his other arm forward and grabbing even more of her arm. "It's going to be okay."

A Sister In (My) Arms

Summary: Pidge is fevered, fatigued, and yet somehow here she is climbing almost a thousand stairs for the good of the Coalition. But she isn’t doing this stupid ceremony for the stupid Coalition. She’s doing it for Allura. And Allura will be there to catch her when she finally falls.

Trick or Treat 

Summary: Pidge (gently drags) Keith with her to go trick or treating at the Garrison sponsored Halloween event. But what is supposed to be all in good fun takes a dark turn when they realize that someone is following them…

Burnt French Toast

Summary: Every Mother’s Day per tradition Pidge and Matt make their mom practically inedible French toast and are then saved by the local bakery. But there’s no bakery this time. Just burnt French toast. And after three years of missed Mother’s Days, of leaving without answers and causing their mom even more pain, Pidge is horrified that this was all they could do.

Stabbing Pain 

Summary: Where Shiro jumps in front of a spear to save Pidge, gets impaled, and insists he is all right as he’s very painfully bleeding out.

Follow You Home 

Summary: Voltron is heading home. Except, for Keith, the destination of Earth isn’t his home, not really. There’s no one waiting for him there. And, he tries to tell himself, that it’s not like the space family he'd made up here with Voltron would abandon him as they go seek out their own loved ones on Earth. But he’s so used to being left behind, forgotten, why should this time be any different? Fortunately, Pidge is right there to remind Keith just how much he belongs with all of them.

[actress4him]

Can I get falling through ice with platonic kidge? Preferably Pidge falling through but I’m good with either!

I’m so sorry that this has taken me...absolutely forever. And I’m sorry that it’s pretty short and simple, I’ve been having a hard time finding inspiration for fanfics lately. But it’s here! And it’s my last current bingo request so yay for finally catching up!

@badthingshappenbingo

Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Prompt: Falling Through Ice

contains: lady whump, hypothermia

.

.

“I think it’s right over here!” Pidge looks up from the map on her tablet and points straight ahead toward what looks like a series of caves carved into the side of a mountain. Without waiting for a response from Keith, she takes off at a jog, eager as he is to get the mission in this horrible frozen wasteland over and done with.

“Be careful,” he calls after her, but he isn’t sure whether she even hears since the wind chooses that moment to pick up. Not that she would listen, anyway. He knows very well how Pidge is when she gets her mind set on something.

Besides, that’s mostly what he’s here for. Watching Pidge’s back. She’s the little genius who can read the map and work the tracking technology and identify minerals once they actually find what they’re looking for. He just has to make sure that she stays alive and well in order to do all of that.

With that in mind, he breaks into a jog behind her, head swiveling back and forth to take in the empty, snow covered expanse of planet as they go. There’s no sign of life anywhere. He really doesn’t expect to see any the whole time, he doesn’t know what could even live in this freezing weather. And they’re far from Galra territory, so they shouldn’t be a problem, either. Still, he’s going to remain vigilant, just in case.

The ground under his feet changes, and he slows a little, frowning down at it. Ice. Not icy ground, just straight up ice, like they’re walking on a frozen lake. With the temperature this low, it should be plenty solid, but…

He switches his comms on since Pidge is too far ahead to hear his voice. “Hey Pidge, you might want to slow down a litt-”

His warning is interrupted by a loud, heart-stopping cracking sound, and an almost simultaneous screech that he hears both over the comms and cutting through the wind. Breath catching in his throat, he looks up just in time to see his teammate plunge down through the ice.

“Pidge!” 

Ignoring his own warning, Keith dashes forward, feet slipping slightly with each pounding step. There isn’t any time to waste, that water will be frigid and she’s got on her armor but he doesn’t know how well it protects against being submerged and she has her faceplate open…

As he draws closer he can both hear and feel the ice weakening under his feet. Forcing himself to slow down, he inches a bit further before sprawling on his stomach, spreading his weight out across more surface, and starts scooting forward like an insect.

“Pidge!” He can see her head. That’s the only thing that’s keeping him from panicking right now. She managed to get her arms out before she fell completely down into the water and caught herself. If she’d gone all the way down and disappeared beneath the ice…he shook the thought out of his head, refusing to dwell on it. “I’m coming, just hang on.” 

“K-k…K-Keith…” She’s already shivering, dang it. “Some…some water g-got int-to my…my…”

“Okay. I understand, it’s okay.” It’ll be fine, he just has to get her out of there and get her back to Red. If there’s one thing Red knows, it’s warmth. 

He reaches the edge of the hole after what feels like ages of crawling. “Okay. I’m gonna close your faceplate, just in case you were to slip down any further, okay?” He isn’t sure if what he sees is a quick nod or just a shiver, but he does it anyway, feeling minutely better when she’s sealed off from any more cold water getting into her suit. 

“Alright. Time to get you out of there.” He hasn’t actually figured out how exactly that’s gonna happen yet, but it only takes a second of consideration for it to come to him. “If I turn around, do you think you can grab on tight to my ankles?”

“Y-y-yeah.”

“Okay. I’m gonna use my jetpack, so make sure you get a good grip.” Painstakingly, trying not to go too fast but feeling the urgent need to get her out of there, he spins himself on the ice until his feet are in front of her. Pidge pries one arm away from the ice, then another, latching onto his ankles with what he’s sure are stiff fingers. 

He just hopes this idea is actually a good one, and that she can hang on. 

“Here goes!” Keith activates his jetpack, and he goes shooting forward on his belly across the ice. Thankfully, he feels Pidge’s weight come with him. As soon as he’s certain they’re clear of the hole and back on more solid ice, he cuts the jetpack off and quickly sits up. Pidge has rolled over onto her side and curled up into a ball. 

“Hey.” He scoots back toward her, looking her over, though he’s not sure what he expects to see. She’s not injured, just freezing. “You okay?”

A shiver racks her body. “Mm-hm. P-peachy.”

It was a stupid question. “Um. I don’t think I should call Red over here, not with this ice. Is it okay if I carry you back?”

“W-w…what ab-bout th-...the m-min-nerals?” She cranes her head to look toward the caves they’d been headed toward. 

Keith rolls his eyes. “I’m taking you back to Red to warm up. If we think we can get the minerals after that, fine. But we’re not doing anything else until you’re safe.” Holding out his hands to her, he waits until she accepts them, then pulls her up and loops her arms over his shoulders. “One, two, three.” Pidge helps as best she can to get them up, Keith on his feet with his hands hooked under her thighs and her hanging onto his back. 

“You g-good?”

He nods. “I’m fine. You hardly weigh anything.”

She slaps him weakly on the helmet as if that’s an insult.

“Alright, it’s gonna be slow going until we get off this ice. Don’t need a repeat incident.” 

He picks his way carefully across the terrain, wishing that there was any way to make this trip go faster. His jetpack won’t carry the both of them, though, and hers is frozen and useless. Every once in a while, he asks her a question, usually checking to see if they’re going the right direction, though it’s mostly just to make sure she’s still awake and aware. The longer they go, the more fuzzy her responses become, and since they’re no longer on the ice he forces himself into a faster trot. 

By the time Red’s welcome form looms through the falling snow, Keith’s exhausted, but he just pushes himself a little harder still. “Almost there. Stay awake.”

“Mm.”

“I mean it, Pidge. If you fall asleep on me now I’ll, uh…I’ll rearrange stuff in your lab when we get back.”

“Nuhh. You woul’n’t.”

“I will. Stay awake.”

“Ugh. ‘Kay.”

She barely does. Keith practically runs up Red’s ramp, into her blessedly warm cockpit, and lowers Pidge into the pilot’s seat as carefully as he can on trembling legs. Her head lolls to the side, but when he taps the side of her helmet she grunts at him and squints her eyes open. 

“Are we home?”

The corner of his mouth crooks up a little. “We’re in Red.” He glances up at the ceiling. “Can we crank up the temperature in here?” 

The Lion gives a quiet rumble in response, and the room grows a little warmer. 

Keith looks back to Pidge. “Feeling any better yet?”

She smiles a little and shuts her eyes again. “Mm. ‘t’s warm…”

“Yeah. We should probably get you out of those wet clothes, but I don’t have anything for you to change into.”

“Feels good. Jus’ need…five more minutes. Then…then minerals.”

He huffs in disbelief. “You need a lot more than five minutes, Pidge. I think I’m gonna take you back to the Castle. We can come back for the minerals later. I don’t wanna risk you getting sick out here.”

Pidge sighs heavily, but she’s in no shape to put up a fight. “Fine. I’m gonna…take a nap.”

Keith laughs lightly. “I guess you can do that.” Now that they’re out of the cold, he’s pretty sure she’ll be safe. “Not in my chair, though. I’ll take you back to the cargo hold.”

He helps her up, and she manages to hobble to the back with one arm around him. As he’s getting her settled, she reaches out and pats him on the arm without opening her eyes. 

“Thanks, Keith. You’re…a good teammate.”

He doesn’t say anything for a long moment, simply staring down at her in surprise. Finally he relaxes a little into a smile. “Get some sleep, Pidge.”

[mushed-kid]

vld as textposts etc. 51

(wowzers im shocked every time i make one of these, idek if people still like them)

[ronihilator]

they hate a bad bitch serving cunt

(lance redesign,, the eyebrow piercing is entirely self indulgent)

[autisticlancemcclain]

Pidge stares hard at her twisted fingers. Her eyes have long since begun to burn, and she holds her face carefully parallel to the floor, knees presses to the sides of her head, watching as her vision gets blurrier and heavier, until eventually the tear drops from her eyes and splatters on her glasses.

“How did you handle it?” she asks hoarsely, not even looking up. “The homesickness.”

For a while Lance doesn’t say anything. His breathing is steady and near-silent, quick little inhales and long, shallow exhales. Practiced breathing, when he’s choking back tears. He does it several times a day. Sometimes Pidge can’t stand to look at him. She doesn’t understand where he puts it all, the sadness that is constantly bubbling out of him. Doesn’t understand where he finds the strength to let his voice get choked up in the middle of a sentence and keep going like there’s nothing wrong. She feels hot shame heat up her own body, in the clear absence of his; a secondhand embarrassment at emotion that shouldn’t be advertised so easily, so trustingly, so constantly.

Eventually he sighs. When Pidge looks up there are tears in his brown eyes, as there so often are, but she fights the urge to look away and tucks herself under his open arm, instead.

It’s warm, in his hold. Bony too. But he holds her without fear of squeezing too tightly, winds his long arm around her back and shoulders and presses her face into his neck. He smells, as he always does, of flowers, although Pidge could not identify what kinds, and she imagines that she’s sat under the rows and rows of shelves in her mother’s greenhouse, watching her work. Her hands shake so she winds them around the creases of Lance’s jacket and grips tightly.

“I don’t,” he says after thinking about it. “I carry it with me. I always have.”

Pidge thinks she knew that, in her bones. She thinks she understood that about Lance from the very second she first saw him, two years ago at the Garrison auditorium in September; this boy who slouched and grinned and shot finger guns and laughed like a hyena and cried four times a day. The boy whose eyes were deep and dark and filled with an abyssal pain that hurts to look at. Off-putting.

“That sounds lonely.”

Lance hums. He shifts, resting his chin on the top of her head. She feels the slow drip of his tears, down his nose and plopping onto her scalp, and parcels at how his heartbeat doesn’t change, the ease in his voice. The shaky steel of it.

“It is. I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t. Lonely. It’s just something I carry.”

Her breath shudders out of her, big and large and shaking her shoulders. She hears what he doesn’t say: I have gotten used to it. She thinks to herself: I will never get used to this weight.

She says: “I don’t understand.”

Ever so slowly, he begins to rock them back and forth, barest sway of their bodies. His lips press her hairline. Her face crumples and her breathing quickens as she forces down the tears, shoves back the mirroring feeling, the mixing of Lance and Matt happening in her head.

“When I was four my oldest brother moved away. He was getting married. I never got over that, I don’t think. He lived down the street longer than he lived down the hall but I never really stopped missing him.”

He pauses for a moment, and Pidge knows it’s deliberate in the way his whole body stops moving, pondering, before starting again.

“Sometimes I miss him on purpose.”

Pidge pulls away, enough to look him in the face, to watch his sad eyes and slight smile and the familiarity in the uncanny expression, the Lance of it.

“Why?” she asks desperately, hands twisting further in his sleeves. “Why would you ever — on purpose?”

“Because I love him on purpose.” The tears drip down Lance’s face as a steady waterfall and he doesn’t even flinch at them, doesn’t even blink. Lets his eyes fill and spill over again and again like cupped hands under a leaking faucet. “When I miss my mom I love her. When I miss my sister I love her. When I miss my brother I love him. When I miss Keith I love him. When I miss you, I love you.” He gently pulls his sleeves away from her clutched fingers, wrapping his hands around them instead and squeezing. “The grief hurts like a never healing wound. But I’m terrified of not having that. I don’t want to wake up one day without the reminder of how deeply I’ve loved and how deeply it will always be a part of me, that love. I don’t know how I’d ever function without it.”

“You don’t function with it,” Pidge argues. “It — haunts you. I see it in your face.”

Lance shrugs. “I function with it. I function because of it. Every day that I miss them I live because I will miss them until I see them again. It’s an — anticipation, almost. I miss you and I can’t wait to see you again mean the same thing.”

A strange noise bursts out from Pidge’s throat, gut-punching. I miss you and I can’t wait to see you again mean the same thing.

She misses her brother in her bones. Her father in her blood. Her mother in her heart.

Waiting to see them again pulses at every level in her body. That’s — manageable.

“Oh,” she says, and she means oh, in the way you blink your eyes open in the mornings. Oh, I see now. Oh, that hurts. Oh, it’s bright.

Lance squeezes her hands again. “There are worse things than loving so much it hurts you,” he says softly.

“Oh,” Pidge says again. “Oh.”

[corruptedplaylist]

excerpt from the last (!!!!) chapter of looking out for you:

“SHIRO THEY’RE BEING FREAKS AGAIN,” Pidge yells downstairs because they are evil and have some sort of 6th lesbian sense where they know when two dudes are about to kiss.

i'm posting the last chapter at 10am EST tomorrow babey so remember to tune in!

[discordiansamba]

fun fact! you've heard that silver and Balmeran crystals can burn Keith, but do you know what else can burn him? that's right! Marmoran blades!

Keith has such complex feelings about the knife his mother left for him. It's the only thing he has from her, and he can't touch it without it burning him. It could do worse to his dad, but he still held onto it like a cherished object. He always told him that his mother left it behind to protect them, but how can it do that if it only hurts them both?

(Was his mother an exorcist? It's not like he can ask around.)

And yet he keeps it, even after his father disappears. Sometimes it even does help keep him safe. He keeps its hilt tightly wrapped, both to hide the strange glowing stone, and so that he can safely hold it. It's why he starts wearing gloves. The knife can hurt him, but it's important. He doesn't want to let it go.

(Years later, he'll face down masked aliens wielding identical blades. They burn just as much.)

[the-coranic-jinx]

“Don’t u touch her” still gets to me

[just-a-dinosaur-i-guess]

we have fun here (have some snippets of an outline for my tachihigugin oneshot i'm writing)

[localfanbaselurker]

do the paladin suits have a lot of padding or something? otherwise they are literally dogshit

[icypantherwrites]

Whumptober Prompt: Fight, Flight or Freeze — Blood Covered Hands —  Pidge

Red Where it Belongs

Summary: How much blood, Pidge faintly wondered, had she lost now? What percentage? The human body couldn’t lose more than forty percent of its blood before death occurred and hypovolemic shock symptoms started around fifteen percent.

She stared at her blood covered hands, at the puddle growing around her, feeling the way everything was going numb and made her guess.

At least twenty percent.

Twenty percent more to go.

Read it here.

[chibi-pix]

So. Apparently some lizards have a defense mechanism where when grabbed or stressed, they can drop their tail at a certain point to distract the predator/threat. And it will typically regenerate. While probably quicker and more flawlessly than lizards, I see this with Regris. But I feel dropping his tail is rare as an older teen/young adult after years of training. But, when working with the vent dwelling paladin, sometimes it just so happens that he gets spooked badly. Poor baby. He's embarrassed that it happened. His tail will be back to normal in no time, but. Don't tell Antok. He's likely to tease the guy about it.

Anyway! I hope y'all enjoy this one! It's been on my mind for so long and I finally got myself to draw it. Until next time!

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

Don’t Hold a Glass Over the Flame  (ch. 1 of 2)

Summary:

A peaceful hike on an uninhabited moon takes a terrible turn and Shiro is forced to use his prosthetic to hurt Pidge to keep her from bleeding out.

I simply love putting Shiro in situations where he is sooo stressed.

Prompt fill for the @badthingshappenbingo​​  prompt "This is for your own good"

Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Pidge | Katie Holt & Shiro, Lance & Shiro (Voltron)

Characters: Shiro (Voltron), Pidge | Katie Holt, Lance (Voltron)

Additional Tags: badthingshappenbingo, Platonic Relationships, Hurt Pidge | Katie Holt, Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst, landmines, Cauterization, Blood, promise it isn't very graphic, Shiro (Voltron) is a Good Friend, Protective Shiro (Voltron), Langst, Bad Things Happen Bingo, This Is for Your Own Good, Pidge | Katie Holt & Shiro Friendship, Field Surgery

bingo card under cut 

[request fills]

[bosspigeon]

moss: ṗ̵̫̠̽̾͊á̷̹̞̘̏̈́̌v̴͓͖̈́̂̆̂e̸̞̱̪̾̔͗͐ ̶̢̖̼̙̾ḿ̴͔͌͠͠y̸͇͇̹͊ ̸͚͕̻̄p̶̡̼̫̹̉̿̍͒a̶̧̟͎̓̀̒t̷̗͐̈́̒̅h̴͍̟̫̘̀̈́͐ ̴̪̞̭̆̌w̷̦̜̲̹̏͆̈́͠i̷͓̖̘̾̔t̶̜̄͐ḩ̵̦͍͌̐ ̶̈́̈́̈́͜ͅc̵̱̊͠ò̷̡̋͋͘ṟ̶̪̕p̷̱͝s̷̤̮̫͗ͅè̶̙̞̬̏̊̎ş̵̧̼͐͛͜!̷̖̲̠̂̒͑!̴̥̑͊!̷̢͎̞̒͝ ̶̬̎̍b̴̝̥̓̋ǔ̸̳̟͜ỉ̶͕̻̙l̴̩̥̀͋d̶̨̰̹͌̏̚ ̴̞͚̟͆͌̉m̶͖̱̥͕͝y̷͔̻̐̔ͅ ̷͍͍̲̺͒͑͆̃c̶͍͗̈́̎a̵͚͒s̴̝̿́ţ̵̭͍͗̊͊͋ͅl̴̝̪͚̅e̸̠̎̎͗̍ ̷̨͙͔̻̈́͋ẇ̶̢̹̙̲͊͋̅ī̷͖̊̿͝ẗ̴̛̩̬̟̾̕h̵͎̬̩̾͂ ̴̺̀́̈́͜b̵̡͎͆͜o̶̡̠͚͚̐͋̔͝n̸̛͓̈́̕ę̷͆̊s̷̳͚͗̊̂!̶̢̄̅̒!̶̟̻̝̾́͗̀!̷̱̣͇̀̑͑͜

me: bestie can we please be normal for a second

[autisticlancemcclain]

For all that Keith easily sees the strength in others, he struggles to accept just how much value he holds. He’s not like Lance, of course — Lance sees the good in every person he meets because as much as he hates to admit it, he’s gullible. But Keith looks at every person he meets and easily identifies their strength. Sometimes it’s with fondness, sometimes with wariness, but he is completely certain that everyone in the universe has a value to them.

He, however, struggles to see how he is valued by others.

It’s not that he thinks he’s useless. He knows he isn’t. He knows he’s skilled. But Lance has always observed Keith in any way he could, and that didn’t stop when they got married. Lance knows his husband can’t quite understand why he is loved as much as he is. He’s happy to explain why he values everyone else, from earnestly explaining to Allura that she’s the spirit of Voltron and fondly telling Lance to leave the math to Pidge — he loves metaphors, that husband of Lance’s, because heaven forbid he just says what he wants to say — but vehemently denies that he might be held in just as high regard.

But Lance knows. Quietly, proved over and over again through the years, he knows that Keith is who people turn to when they need someone. Keith is reliable, he’s dependable, he’s strong — a little tactless, sure, but when you’re scared and vulnerable and you don’t know what to do or who to rely on? You turn to Keith. Lance did it himself, years and years ago, when there were five lions and six paladins and he didn’t know where to go from there. The war may be behind them, but that didn’t stop their team from needing their leader.

1. Pidge

Lance really starts to clue in when Keith’s phone goes off, late at night, when they’re cuddling and watching a movie (but mostly cuddling).

“Sorry,” Keith mutters sheepishly. Lance just rolls his eyes fondly and digs around for the remote to pause the movie (he is not going to have Keith talk over Legally Blonde. That’s a sin). Remote search or no, though, Lance refuses to move even one inch away from his own personal space heater, so he feels it when said personal space heater tenses up.

Here we go.

“Yeah, yeah, okay. Just — don’t hang up. I’m coming, okay?”

Keith puts his hand over the base of his phone, looking at Lance urgently.

“It’s Pidge.”

“Is she okay? Does she need Voltron?”

“Not all of us,” he says, hushed. “She’s just — she messed around in the wrong server and got herself arrested in the Delrn quadrant. She needs someone to go get her.”

Lance exhales, shoulders slumping. That’s not — that’s not good, obviously, but after years of Pidge needs help meaning Pidge is being ambushed by dozens of armed soldiers, it’s a lot less scary.

“You need my help?”

Keith shakes his head. “No, you stay here. I’ve got it. It shouldn’t take too long. Don’t wait up though, okay?”

He presses a kiss to Lance’s cheek before untangling himself from the blankets, walking over to the front door and sliding on his boots.

“I’m coming now, Pidge, okay? Keep on, I’ll transfer your line to my ship in a minute.”

“Text me when she’s safe,” Lance calls as Keith unlocks the door.

“Will do.” He shoots a rueful smile in Lance’s direction. “Sorry for ditching movie night.”

Lance shakes his head fondly, waving him away. “Go, Oh Mighty Black Paladin. I’ll see you when you get home.”

Keith grins at him one more time before he ducks into the garage, locking the door behind him. Lance sighs, turning off the T.V. and folding the blanket, heading over to the kitchen to make himself a coffee. He won’t be able to sleep until he knows Pidge is home safe, anyway. (And, he’ll be honest, there’s a snowball’s chance in hell that he’ll be able to sleep without Keith’s constant snores.)

By the time Keith gets home, Lance has finished three (3) coffees and has sewn the lining of the current project he’s working on. It’s something like 4 in the morning, but Lance stopped looking at the clock a couple hours ago.

“I thought I told you not to wait up,” Keith says, leaning down to press a lingering kiss to Lance’s lips.

“Mm,” Lance mumbles, grabbing Keith’s shirt and keeping him right where he is (pressed close close closely to Lance, where Lance has selfishly and unashamedly decided he belongs). “Can’t sleep without you. I’ve unfortunately fallen victim to your conditioning, Pavlov.”

Keith snorts, kissing him one last time before fully scooping him up in his arms.

Lance, whipped as he is, does not protest.

“I think you’re maybe just in love with me,” he says, smirking.

Lance pretends to think about it. “I dunno. There’s this really hot guy, maybe you’ve heard of him. Leader of Voltron? Ex-Blade? He’s got this dreamy mullet. I kind of have a thing for him.”

Keith rolls his eyes, fully throwing him on the bed and crawling in after him, ignoring Lance’s indignant yelp.

“He sounds like a dork,” he says drily.

Lance grins. “He is.”

“Whatever, you butthead. Get over here so we can sleep.”

Without a moment of hesitation, Lance flops into Keith’s open arms, snaking his arms around his husband’s waist and tangling their legs together. He holds him closely, head over his heart, listening to it beat.

“Pidge okay?” he asks softly.

Keith hums, running his hands through Lance’s hair. “Yeah. Pretending to be less shaken up than she is. She got cocky and got caught and it freaked her out, so she started running her mouth. You know her.”

Lance laughs quietly. Sounds like Pidge.

“But it wasn’t that big of a deal. I went to the station and talked them out of pressing charges for spying. She’s banned from the quadrant for life, but nothing else. Dunno why she called me to help. Coran probably would have been more helpful.”

Privately, Lance thinks he knows exactly why Pidge called Keith. Why, when she was scared and alone and knew she had fucked up, she immediately called the one person who would drop everything to make sure she’s okay. Who has done it for her before and will do it again. Who respects her as a grown woman, now, who doesn’t need his guidance, but who will never stop providing his support.

“Bet she thought the big bad Black Paladin would win her some intimidation points,” he says instead, because he knows his husband isn’t yet ready to hear it.

They’ll get there.

2. Hunk

It’s not that Keith gets these calls often. Hell, definitely no more than once every five or six months. Few and far between, really. Staggered enough that the pattern might skip most people’s notice.

But Lance knows better.

So when Keith’s phone rings — and of course it actually rings, because Keith is the only person Lance knows who never, ever turns his ringer off, because even though he might not realise it he is constantly ready to help and would never put himself in a position where he can’t — in the middle of their mortgage meeting with the bank, Lance ducks his head to hide his smile.

He figured that might happen.

“Fuck,” Keith mutters, digging around in his pocket. “Sorry. I have to take this.”

The bank teller — a very serious-looking woman in her late sixties — does not look amused. She mutters something about professionalism.

Lance does her a favour and does not point out that Keith is one of five reasons that Earth is not currently a pile of space dust, and she should perhaps provide some lenience.

“Keith?” comes a nervous, teary voice from Keith’s phone (the bank teller’s office is real small, and there’s no room for privacy).

“Yeah, Hunk. You okay?”

“Um, sorry to bother you. You’re probably busy. But, uh. My car broke down? I tried fixing it myself but I don’t have the parts I need, and triple A says they can’t send a tow because of all the snow, and I’m wearing a coat but I don’t really want to be here for hours so —“

“Hunk,” Keith interrupts, “breathe, buddy.”

Hunk does, deep and noisy enough to be heard through the phone.

(Lance thinks back to the first time he can remember that Hunk’s anxiety made itself known around Keith. He remembers seeing Keith, eighteen and still bitter and unsure but desperate to be part of a family, with wide panicked eyes and stuttering advice about ‘not worrying about it’, trying to calm Hunk down to no avail. It’s certainly something, he’s thinks, that Keith can now calm Hunk effortlessly through the phone.)

“I’m leaving now to come pick you up. We’ll come back later to get your car, yeah?”

“I don’t want to put you out —“

“Hunk,” Keith says firmly, “chill out. Or, er, don’t, I guess, since that’s the problem. Um, stay in your car so you’ll stay warm. I’ll be there soon. Okay?”

“…Okay.”

Keith hangs up, and looks apologetically at Lance.

“I’m sorry, babe, I know this is important —”

Lance squeezes his hand. “Go. I got this.”

Keith quickly gets up from the stuffy chair, presses a kiss to Lance’s temple, and rushes out without a word.

The bank teller sniffs. “High demand, your husband. Can’t even make time for one appointment. That doesn’t inspire confidence, you know.”

“Family emergency, ma’am,” Lance says with great amusement. “Besides, we’re nearly finished. I’ll make sure to relay everything you say to him when he gets home.”

Lance decides to walk home after the meeting, since Keith has their car. It’s nice. Despite the mishap, the meeting had gone rather smoothly, and there’s no reason why they shouldn’t get approved for their mortgage within the week. That’ll keep things going nicely. Lance will miss their quiet little apartment, but he’s excited for what they’re going to build together next.

Besides, he thinks, when Keith gets home several hours later with a sheepish Hunk in tow, it’ll be nice to have a couple guest bedrooms.

He’s sure they’ll need them.

3. Romelle

The ring of the doorbell makes them both panic.

“Is that the social worker?”

“She’s not supposed to be here for another hour,” Lance hisses, three steps away from freaking out. Keith is not far behind him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. Can we ignore it?”

“No, we can’t ignore it! It’s a home visit! We need to be home!”

“Fuck! Okay! I’m gonna answer the door, fix your hair!”

Lance does, frantically trying to pat it down so it doesn’t look like he’s been nervously running his hands through it for four hours (he has) or that he just had sex (he hasn’t). (Well. Not since this morning.)

“Here, let me —” Lance practically melts at Keith’s touch, his gentle hands through the knots in Lance’s un-straightened hair, even though it’s certainly not a new sensation.

But he always appreciates Keith’s hands on him.

“We’ll be okay,” Keith says, dropping a kiss on Lance’s forehead before stepping away. “I mean, if we fail we can just be assholes and pull the saviours-of-the-universe card, right?”

Lance flicks him on the forehead, unable to fight back a smile. “We’re supposed to be responsible now, Mullet.”

Keith grins, curling one hand in Lance’s and one around the doorknob. “Whatever you say, Kogane. You ready?”

Lance nods, squeezing Keith’s hand.

They’ve got this.

“Hi,” says someone who is decidedly not the social worker, looking at them nervously from their front door.

Keith and Lance blink at her, and then each other, shocked.

Well. At least this is better than Mrs. Kreft coming early, at least.

“Romelle? What are you doing here?”

The Altean’s face crumples, and she throws herself at Keith.

“I don’t know what I’m doing with my life,” she wails.

Lance sighs fondly, shaking his head.

He should have known.

“I’ll call Mrs. Kreft,” Lance says as Keith guides the sobbing woman to their couch. Keith nods gratefully, then turns his attention back to Romelle, so Lance heads to the kitchen to give them some privacy.

He quickly dials the social worker’s number, resting his hip on the counter and fiddling with a random pen he found.

“Lance! I’m about to leave for your place now. Everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” he reassures. “Keith’s sister popped by unexpectedly, though. She’ll probably stay for a couple weeks. I was wondering if you could maybe do one of our character evaluations at the same time as the home visit? Two birds with one stone, you know.”

If there’s one thing Lance is good at, it’s rolling with the punches. He’ll handle this.

“You caught me at a good time, then,” Mrs. Kreft says jovially. “I’ll get the right paperwork. Is Keith’s sister prepared for the interview process? She’s not really meant to rehearse or anything — she’s supposed to provide an honest and timely assessment of your caregiving abilities — but it would be best if she knew it was coming.”

“I’ll make sure to brief her. Thank you, Mrs. Kreft. We really appreciate it.”

“Of course, Lance. I’m rooting for you two. I’ll see you in about forty-five minutes.”

“Alright, thanks. Bye.”

Keith walks in to the kitchen just as she hangs up.

“Everything okay?”

“Yes,” Lance says, reaching over to rest his hand on the side of Keith’s neck. He rubs his thumb over the tense muscles there, tracing over his clenched jaw and pursed lips. “I handled it, baby. She’s going to do a character interview with Romelle at the same time, so this worked out.”

Keith sighs in relief, tilting forward to rest his head on Lance’s shoulder. Lance shifts so he’s comfortable, running his hands through Keith’s hair.

“Oh, thank God.”

Lance hums. “Told you it would be fine.”

“I know. It’s just — I feel like every time we try and do something for our future, something happens and you end up picking up my mess on your own. We’re about to — we’re trying to be parents, Lance. I want us to be on equal grounds.”

“Hey.” Lance tugs gently on his husband’s hair. “Look at me.”

Keith does, looking down at him with a furrowed brow and frustrated pout. Lance reaches up to smooth the line between his eyebrows.

“Do you think I walked into this unprepared?” he asks sternly. “I know you, sweetheart. I knew exactly what I signed up for when I agreed to be your right hand. Do you think that stopped when the war was won? Do you think I didn’t know that were were going to be doing this leading schtick our whole lives? I knew who you were when I married you, baby. This is not a surprise. You’re not leaving me to clean up after you. We’re a team, cielo. And sometimes a team means I stay home and hold the fort while you’re picking up our dumbass friends from a holding cell, or calling the social worker as you make sure everything’s okay. Okay?”

Keith exhales, pressing his forehead to Lance’s.

“Okay. Thank you, Lance. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Lance presses a quick kiss to his lips before stepping away, grabbing a box of tissues and filling up a glass of water. “Okay, Samurai. Fill me in. What’s up with Romelle?”

“She’s worried she’s got no future. She’s been kind of drifting around between New Altea and the Rebels and the Blades, doesn’t feel like she fits in anywhere.”

“So she’s going through the emo Keith phase,” Lance teases.

Keith scowls. “Whatever. Technically.”

“She came to the right place, then. Your earnestly awkward life-coach ass will have her fixed up in no time.”

“You’re mean to me,” Keith says, pouting.

Lance laughs, pressing a kiss to his lips. “Mhm, and you’d be lost without me. Let’s go make sure you’re sister is okay.”

Intermission

To Lance’s relief, there are no interruptions on the most important day of their lives — the day everything they’ve been slowly working for comes together. The day their family grows to four — two kids, siblings, lives uprooted by the war — there are no interruptions. No one calls, no one shows up unexpectedly, no one needs their help.

It’s just them, terrified and elated at the front door, meeting Mason and Keevah for the first time.

Keith is the first to react. He squeezes Lance’s hands three times in quick succession then lets go, sitting criss-cross-applesauce on the floor, eye-level with Mason. He looks at Keith warily, untrusting.

It makes Lance’s heart ache, for this little boy who had the worst thing that could ever happen to a kid happen to him while the entire planet was falling apart, who has learned to be jaded and icy to every adult he’s met, who only barely remembers what it’s like to live in a loving home.

“Hi,” Mason says eventually.

Keith smiles slightly. “I’m Keith. My husband’s name is Lance.” Lance waves. Mason glances at him, but does not wave back. “We have a room prepared for you and your sister.”

Mason blinks, surprised. “Me and Keevah?”

Lance smiles, finally losing the battle with his tears. (He’s doing everything he can to keep the smile on his face, keep himself from openly sobbing. He keeps imagining himself in Mason’s position, losing his parents before he could talk properly and suddenly desperate to stay with your infant sister. It’s heartbreaking. He already aches for this kid, and he barely knows him.)

(Yet.)

“Yes,” he says, voice cracking. “We figured that would make the transition easier.”

Mason hesitates a moment. Lance can see the emotions warring on his face — to trust, or not to trust — and he can hear Keith’s breathing shift, slightly, like he’s remembering feeling those exact same emotions himself, years and years ago, stepping into Shiro’s apartment for the first time and wondering if it’s worth it to hope.

“Okay,” Mason says eventually. He tugs on Keevah’s hand, wrapped tightly around her big brother’s finger, other thumb in her mouth as she stares at Keith and Lance with blatant curiosity. “Let’s go, Keevah. It’s late. Time for bed.”

Lance moves to guide them to their new room, but Keith stands, placing a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“It’s the first door on your left,” he tells them. Mason nods once and walks off, superhero suitcase rolling behind him. (They hadn’t known if Mason liked superheroes, or Keevah, but Keith had been adamant that they buy a set of luggage before signing all the paperwork, quietly confiding that the worst thing about moving to a new home growing up was packing all your shit in a garbage bag, like that was all it was worth. Lance was quick to agree.)

“They’ll need time to adjust,” Keith murmurs. “I always hated the fosters that were too overbearing.”

Lance sniffles, nodding. “Good point.”

Keith’s smile is soft as he reaches over to brush the tears from Lance’s cheeks, bending down to press a kiss to his forehead.

“Everything will work out,” he murmurs. “Promise.”

The surety of his husband’s voice makes him smile. Keith’s strength is unwavering.

“I know. I trust you.”

4. Allura

By the time the fourth call comes, half a year later, Keith is starting to catch on. He’s in the middle of shoving their last duffel bag into the trunk when his phone rings, and his sigh is so heavy that Lance can hear it from the driver’s seat. He hides a smile in his hand.

Keith’s phone is connected to the car’s bluetooth, so Lance turns down the volume — high enough that he can hear, but low enough that Mason and Keevah, who are playing patty cake in the back seat, can’t.

“Allura? Everything okay?” Despite his exasperation, his voice is calm.

For a whole fifteen seconds the other end is silent, long enough that Lance would almost think that the Queen of New Altea had simply butt dialed them were it not for the faintest sounds of heavy, stressed breathing. Then Allura blurts out: “I can’t do this anymore.”

There’s another moment of silence as Keith processes that.

“Do what?” he asks hesitantly. He slides into the passenger seat, buckling up and flashing a small smile at Lance. Lance shoots him a thumbs up in acknowledgment, glancing in the rearview to make sure the kids are buckled too, before peeling out of the driveway, setting route for his parent’s house.

“Do this!” Allura cries, tears audible in her voice. “I’m — I’m quiznaking everything up! I can’t — I’m not fit to be a leader, Keith! I’m not you, I’m not Shiro, and I’m certainly not my father, and I am going to lead my entire people and our planet into a flaming pile of Weblum dung! I am the worst queen to ever be coronated! I’m a mistake!” She sobs, so loud the audio crackles with it. Lance exchanges a worried look with his husband.

He’s never heard Allura so upset — not even when they were facing the end of the universe and none of them had a hail mary to fall back on.

“You’re not a mistake, Allura.” Keith’s voice is quiet, but firm, full of undeniable conviction. He leaves absolutely no room for doubt. “Don’t insult my friend that way.”

Allura chokes on another sob over the phone. For a while there are no words, just the sound of her cries, long enough that Lance feels his own heart start to hurt and chin start to tremble. He hates hearing his friends — his family — suffering.

“I don’t know what to do,” Allura chokes out. “I’m not — every choice I make is the wrong one.”

Keith reaches over and plucks one of Lance’s hands off the steering wheel, gripping it tightly. He doesn’t even seem to notice he’s done it, staring thoughtfully at his phone, like he needed to borrow Lance’s strength for a minute. He hates hearing any of them in pain, too.

Lance squeezes tightly, happy to lend it.

“What happened?”

It’s hard to make out everything she’s saying, intergalactic calls already so staticky on top of her emotions making her accent thicker than usual, but the gist is pretty obvious. Allura has been queen for half a decade, now, a little more — the honeymoon phase, so to speak, is starting to wear off. No longer are all her people just relieved to be out from Lotor’s tyranny — like with any nation, tension has arisen, and Allura is struggling to handle it all on her own. She can’t please everybody, and it’s beyond disheartening to have so many people, who were once completely happy with her and her leadership, frustrated with her.

Keith lets her vent until she finally stops for a moment to breathe. He takes a moment to gather himself, frowning deeply.

“I don’t understand why all of this is resting on your shoulders,” he says carefully.

There’s a pause.

“…Pardon?”

“You seem to be the only one putting out every single fire that’s popping up,” Keith repeats. “Where’s Coran? Or the rest of your council?”

This time the pause is much longer.

Guiltier.

“I don’t want to burden them.”

Keith sighs, but it’s not disappointed. It’s exasperated. Concerned, more than anything. Despite himself, Lance smiles; it’s the exact same sigh Lance would often heave when Keith was trying to do everything by himself, in his earliest Black Paladin days. It’s beyond a little amusing to hear it from the other end.

“Allura, that is their job. They are paid to take some of that burden from you, dude. Quite a lot of it, in fact.”

“Still,” Allura says stubbornly. “It’s not — I’m the queen. ‘Heavy is the head that wears the crown’, as you humans say.”

Keith’s indigo eyes brighten. Lance groans, barely resisting the urge to slam his head on the steering wheel — he recognises that look. That’s his husband’s I just thought of an applicable metaphor look.

Keith gleefully ignores him, bolstering right on.

“And what happens if the head is too heavy, ‘Llura?”

Lance groans louder, so Allura can hear this time. It startles a laugh out of her, which brings a smile to Lance’s face and a scowl to Keith’s.

“…You topple right over,” Allura admits begrudgingly.

Keith nods, inordinately pleased with himself. “Exactly.”

“You’re infuriating,” Allura informs him. She blows her nose. “I hate it when you’re right.”

“Well, good thing that doesn’t happen often,” Lance chimes in, because the opportunity was right there and the whole point of marriage is that he has the opportunity to mock Keith until they both finally bite it.

Allura laughs as Keith glares at him. Lance smiles primly.

“I cannot believe you two,” Keith mutters to himself. Lance kisses the tips of his fingers with an exaggerated mwah noise and presses the fingers to Keith’s forehead. Much to his own chagrin, no doubt, the action makes his lips twitch up into a smile.

“Thank you, Keith,” Allura says. “You too, Lance. I — appreciate it. And you.”

The softness bleeds back into Keith’s expression. Sap. “Of course, Allura. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

He’s quiet for a moment after she hangs up, contemplative.

“Isn’t it strange that she called me for — for leadership advice?” he questions finally, turning to face Lance. “I mean, I stumbled through every day as leader. Shiro was more of a natural. Hell, you’re better with pep talks, Mr. The Black Lion Chose You And I Trust It’s Judgement.”

The set up is there. Lance could spell it out for him now, gently explain what he’s observed over the years, what he knows to be true — Keith, even though he refuses to admit it or even let himself notice, is the cornerstone of their family, the one who grew up with so much change so constantly that he learned to find steadiness in himself.

But that’s a longer conversation. That’s a quiet conversation, for when Lance can give his husband his full attention, when they can face each other and be honest and work through the inevitable pain of Keith accepting that as truth. Not when Lance is driving, and their kids are in the back, very obviously listening in at this point.

“Oh, come on, Fearless Leader,” Lance teases. “She knew she needed a nice, cheesy metaphor to set her head on straight, isn’t it obvious?”

Keith scoffs, smacking him on the bicep. “Jerk.”

Lance gasps loudly, clutching the bicep dramatically.

“Mason! Keevah! Did you see what your evil, evil daddy did to me?! To your beloved Papa! Oh, how I am wounded! Betrayed! By the love of my life, my dearest husband, the man to whom I have pledged my heart —”

The kids giggle, Keith rolling his eyes so hard it has to hurt him.

Lance smiles to himself. Now’s not the right time, but they’ll get there — soon.

5. Sylvio

The truth finally starts to cement itself in Keith’s head by the fifth phone call.

Lance groans as his husband’s ringtone drags him from his sleep, glaring at the man who sleeps peacefully right through it. He smacks him with a pillow, waking him with a startled “Wha—?” and then hands him his phone.

“Hello?” Keith asks groggily, sitting up — dragging Lance, who was laying on his chest, up with him, much to his chagrin — and rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

There’s a beat of silence, then a timid: “Tio Keith?”

Both of them shoot up in alarm. Lance hasn’t heard his nephew sound so close to tears since he was much younger.

“It’s three in the morning, kiddo,” Keith says, looking at Lance as if to ask what’s going on?. Lance shrugs, gesturing at the phone — find out!

“I fucked up,” Sylvio says in a small voice, and then he bursts into tears. Keith leaps out of bed immediately, frantically looking for some pants. Lance grabs them and tosses them to him, watching in concern.

“Woah — Sylvio — slow down, I can’t —”

But Sylvio keeps rambling, in a mix of Spanish and English so muddled that even Lance has no idea what he’s saying.

“Just please come get me,” he cries, the first clear words in minutes.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming, kiddo. Where are you?”

Sylvio rattles off an address, and Keith nods. “I’m coming, okay? Keep your phone on you.”

Sylvio says something in affirmation, then keeps crying, muttering to himself. Keith covers the phone with one hand, he other tugging on some socks. He looks at Lance in panic.

“Why is he calling me?”

Lance shrugs. “I don’t know.”

“You should go,” Keith says nervously. “He’s your nephew, you —”

“He’s your nephew too,” Lance interrupts quietly. “You know that. Plus, he called you, cielo. You’re the one he needs right now.”

Keith doesn’t look any more reassured. In fact he looks more desperate and confused by the second. “Maybe we should both go.”

Lance is already shaking his head before he finishes his sentence. “Keevah’s sick, baby. One of us has to stay home in case she gets worse, or throws up.” He slides off the bed, padding over to Keith and cupping his face gently. “Go, Keith. Bring him back, we’ll talk to him then, okay? I’ll wait up. Luis and Lisa aren’t far from here, it won’t take you more than twenty minutes both ways.”

“Right.” Keith takes a deep breath, closing his eyes. When he opens them again, most of the panic is gone, replaced with the same determination he always has when things get a little dicey and hopeless. “I’ll be back in a bit,” he says, leaning down and pressing a quick kiss to Lance’s lips. Lance holds him there for a moment, trying to press a little bit more of his love into it than usual.

“I’ll be here.”

+1. Keith

A little less than an hour later, Lance hears their car pull into the driveway. He tugs his robe around him tightly, hurrying to open the door.

“Hey,” Keith says, kissing him quickly and then moving to let Sylvio come through. His face is creased in worry. Sylvio walks in after, silently, shoulders hunched and eyes puffy, face streaked with tears. Lance closes and locks the door behind him, reaching up to hug his nephew tightly.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

Sylvio sniffles, face crumpling. He leans into Lance’s embrace, face to his neck, and Lance feels his face get wet with tears again. “Hi, Tio.” His voice cracks.

Lance guides them both to the living room, setting them down on the couch.

“I’ll grab some tea,” Keith murmurs.

Lance hums at him, leaning back onto the cushions and stroking Sylvio’s hair as he cries. Keith is back shortly, setting three mugs on the coffee table and sitting on Sylvio’s other side, arm over the back of the couch. He’s silent for a while, waiting for the kid’s cries to peter out.

“What happened?” he asks, once Sylvio has finally calmed down a bit.

“Dad and I have been fighting a lot,” he says quietly. Lance winces. He’s heard from Lisa and Luis, of course, but he would have figured it out even if he hadn’t — Sylvio has called Luis ‘Papa’ every day of his life, since he was a little boy. He’s only called Luis ‘Dad’ when he’s furious, when he’s deliberately trying to hurt Luis, when both of them can barely stand to be in the same room as each other.

Lance rubs his shoulder. “What happened?”

Sylvio’s chin trembles, and another tear drips down his cheek. “He never — no one I bring home is ever good enough. Nadia can bring home whomever she wants and it’s never a problem, but when I do it, suddenly he has a million faults and he’s bad for me or too old for me or just a shitbag.” He makes a noise of frustration. “He treats me like a baby, like I’m incapable of of making a fucking decision for myself.”

As subtly as he can, Lance exchanges a look with Keith. This is not the first time this situation has been brought up, by more than one person. Sylvio calls Lance to complain about his parents on a semi-regular basis, and both Luis and Lisa have confided in him on more than one occasion.

The problem is, Sylvio is…kind of in the wrong, here.

Privately, when they try and make light of the situation, they joke that Sylvio has the Lance taste — that is, garbage. Before Keith, Lance was very good at falling for people who were either really bad for him, bad in general, didn’t like him, or treated him like shit. A good portion of that came from his own insecurity and cripplingly low self-esteem, and Sylvio is no exception.

Every guy he has brought home has been, to Luis’ credit, not good enough. Once it was someone who made fun of Sylvio every other sentence, once it was a guy who was three times his age, once someone who was clearly using Sylvio as a rebound… Luis saw it, but he was incapable of handling it in any way other than outright banning Sylvio from seeing whomever the loser of the month was, which went about as well as you would think.

It’s been an ongoing problem.

“I’m sorry you guys are fighting,” Lance says, because it’s truly not his place to try and parent Sylvio. He’s tried to guide both his brother and his nephew into the right direction, but neither listen. “I’m glad you called us first, though. That was the safest thing for you to do.”

Sylvio bites his lip. Keith shakes his head slightly.

Lance’s face drops. “Oh, Sylvio…”

His nephew’s face crumples. “I thought the party would be a good distraction,” he whispers. “I didn’t think — he’s supposed to love me, why did he —” Sylvio interrupts himself with a sob. Lance holds him tightly again. He’s not sure exactly what happened, and he won’t know until he can ask, but he can make a pretty good assumption.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. Let it out.”

Sylvio cries on his shoulder for a while longer, long past when he runs out of tears, just dry-sobbing until his whole body shakes and his eyes must be burning. Lance holds him through it, and Keith keeps a steady hand on his back.

“Daddy?” comes a small voice, at least a half hour later. All three of them crane their necks towards the sound, seeing Keevah, eyes watery, standing in the low light of the kitchen with her stuffed lion clutched in her hand. “I threw up.”

Keith gets up immediately. “Oh, c’mere, sweetie.” He scoops her up, her head resting on his shoulder, then turns toward Lance. “I’ll put her back to bed, you get Sylvio to bed?”

Lance nods, and Keith heads back to her and Mason’s bedroom. Lance stands, gently pulling his nephew to his feet, guiding him to the guest room.

Once he’s got the bed turned down and Sylvio in some of Keith’s old pj’s, he tucks him into bed like he’s nine instead of nineteen, kissing him gently on the forehead.

“I’ll call your parents to let them know you’re safe, okay?” Sylvio nods, half asleep. “Sleep. We’ll talk more in the morning.”

By the time Lance hits the lights, he’s out. Lance watches him for a moment, smiling sadly.

He’ll figure it out. Lance did, when he was nineteen, even though it sucked.

He pads over to his and Keith’s bedroom, exhausted, but knowing that he won’t be sleeping for a while. Keith is already there, pulling off his vomit-stained shirt — poor Keevah — and pulling on a fresh one.

“She okay?” Lance murmurs, crawling under the covers and into Keith’s open arms. Keith nods, tightening his hold and pressing a kiss to Lance’s hair.

“Yeah. Fell asleep halfway through her bath.”

“Poor thing.”

Keith is silent for a while, fingertips tracing circles on Lance’s lower back, but he’s nowhere near falling asleep. He’s tense as a live wire, and Lance can feel his heart pound where their chests are pressed together.

“I don’t understand,” he says eventually. His voice is so quiet Lance can barely hear him.

Lance doesn’t need him to specify. “I do.”

The mindless shapes Keith is tracing shift to something more deliberate, tapping, seeking comfort rather than mindless fidgeting.

“…Explain it to me?”

Lance shifts slightly, so he’s still in Keith’s hold but there’s a bit of space between them, so he can look Keith in the face.

“People trust you, Keith. There’s nothing to explain.” He leans in and presses a kiss to Keith’s neck, the hollow of his throat — not to instigate anything, but to touch, to press his lips somewhere vulnerable and say I am watching out for you. “You are so deliberate, my love. So devoted. Everyone knows it, even if they don’t realise it outright.”

Keith’s breathing is laboured. “I’m not what they think I am,” he says, voice wrecked. Lance presses another kiss right on his adam’s apple, to his trachea, to the underside of his jaw, to his chin.

“You are more than you think you are.”

“I’m not. I’m not.” Lance kisses right under his ear, and he tastes salt, from where a tear finally escaped and trailed down his cheekbone. “I’m a mess, Lance. Nothing about me is stable. Why do they rely on me?”

“I rely on you.”

“That’s different. We’re — you’re my husband. We rely on each other.”

Lance pauses for a second, gathering his thoughts, considering his angle. How can he explain the fundamental truth about Keith Kogane that is so obvious to everyone who knows him? That is the clearest part of him?

“When Pidge wanted to run from Voltron and find her family, who convinced her to stay?”

Keith is silent.

“When Shiro had flashbacks of his year of torture and couldn’t tell reality from nightmare, who sat with him until he could breath again?”

Keith’s chin trembles.

“When the Blades were out of ideas and out of luck, who changed everything?”

His breathing gets heavier. “Lance —”

Lance ignores him, barrelling on. “When Hunk’s panic attacks got so bad he was convinced he was having a heart attack, who squeezed his hand until he could breath again?”

Keith sobs. “Lance, that’s not —”

Lance reaches up to gently wipe the tears, staring at his husband until he finally looks back, until indigo meets brown and he knows that Keith is finally getting it.

“Who,” he asks quietly, determined, “was it that I came to, when there were five lions and six paladins? Who stepped down for me?”

Keith laughs wetly. “I gave you the worst pep talk in the world,” he protests, but Lance can finally hear the acceptance in his voice. He smiles.

“And yet.”

“And yet,” Keith agrees. He ducks down and kisses Lance soundly, hands cupping his face, lips moving like he’s trying to fuse himself to Lance.

“Thank you. For knowing and watching and waiting for me.”

“Always,” Lance murmurs, pressing their foreheads together. “Always, my star.”

[corruptedplaylist]

ch 16!

hello early update!!!! tw for keith having a panic attack!!!! highlight reel includes: lance resolving some of his family conflict, receiving consolation from his dad, surprise guest in keith's story, klance kiss