#I CANT TAKE CREDIT BUT I WILL BC IM FAKE

[saintobio]

HELLOOO FINALLY GOT TO SEND AN ASK!!!

first of allllll…. i think the time momjo sending the child guardian paper (?) that satoru typed out of anger is a hint…. and then satoru telling yn that sachiro called akemi mama… this honestly hurts alot more, imahine carrying your baby for 9 months, taking care of baby sachiro for 3 years alone, all the sleepless nights… and sachiro just ugh u dumbass small brain toddler (literally). anyways, satoru looking at akemi during suguru and shoko’s wedding, his hand rubbing akemi’s stomach at the cabin when she was in pain. honestly this part was akemi faking her pain or…? cuz there was a line that said after satoru asked if she wanted to go home her face didnt show anymore pain ? lololll idk. i dislike (hate) gojokemi but i think theyre gonna be endgame with all these theories coming up oh godddd. and the way yn threw the necklace into the lake, satoru went to search for it but did he manage to find it ? no. but during sn yn (well, suguru) found gojos wedding band. so in sy, yn threw away satoru’s “heart”, and it was never found again, thats a hint (?) bruhhh i hate thissss (i love this so much actually it made me feel so much i love u saint) i also recall the first time satoru and akemi first did it together he said smthg like i could learn to love u ? if i remember correctly. and the morning at the cabin after yn and gojo did it, yn was crying bcs they had a heartfelt talk ? and u mentioned they both felt guilty. the guilt is…. yeah.

BUT ALSO, satoru once said that yn has always been the one, sera when she saw gojo after forever told sukuna that he looks different when hes being with akemi, like hes not being himself? but that was when they first got together so idk about now. him not calling gojokemi exclusive. oh how they were happy and loving when yn got pregnant 🥹 but well it lasted until… yeah. also u said something about gojo gonna be on his knees again, since yn is now depressed and suicidal, i think for her heart disease shes gonna sign a DNR, then satoru on his knees maybe begging the doctors idk gawd idk someone mentioned dnr and i just… 🙂 its not that she wanna leave sachiro either, but i think shes telling herself everything will be better if she dies since sachiro, still very young, doesnt even really remember yn (just why sachiro) and called akemi mama… also why the hell didnt gojo use protection when fucking akemi oh gawd pls hate u satoru if she gets preggo.

anyways, i cant wait for gen to be back. i love u gen and ian.

oooh i also remember that you said there was a scene that inspired the birth of sn/sy, was it in chapter 11 ? or we’re not there yet…

honestly why dont yn just join shoko and suguru and be in a happy poly relationship ever looollll just kidding. my heart hurts, im still all in for gojoyn endgame but it doesnt seem realistic. ive been cursing gojo and akemi ever since the chapter came out loolll gotta give myself credit for being able to do my exams while still thinking bout this. 💀

omg there’s a lot to unfold here idk where to start 😭 but i just wanna say, it’s amazing how you’re so thorough in remembering those details in sn/sy bcos i honesty don’t have enough attention span to do that !!! sdjsj now while i can’t answer everything you mentioned, i can say a few things:

- akemi isn’t faking her pain, she’s truly struggling from it

- gojo doesn’t want kids outside of marriage (or should i say if not with yn), so he’s definitely careful with it.

- yes, it is indeed sy11 that birthed the sequel :’) i had that scene in mind before sn was even finished

[valscodblog]

So-I s'pose ye'll be needin' this.

@thealtofvalleyxdoodles's sideblog <3

SHIT ABT ME! (Sorry for the horrible fake scottish accent. I am A Soap girlie thru and thru.)

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[israaverse]

This is probably a result of diminishing expectations but it's wild how Civil War was the last movie to give Bucky a decent look, because every appearance since then seems intent on making him uglier and hideouser— okay wait I just realized I'm kinda exaggerating his look on the Falcon show wasn't bad I'm just letting my hate for that shows writing & the it's exemplification of nearly all the ways Marvel used the Cap brand to push propaganda cloud my perception of the visuals..... but everything else! jail. (can you tell I just discovered what he looks like in the quote "degenerate villain" squad movie?)

NGL they did Steve bad but at least they killed him off. Seeing how they made a decent Cap2 with blatant cliffhanger-setup for a sequel continuing that storyline just to... not continue it & instead cast Bucky as The Bad Guy of the Group because of multiple directors+writers (explicitly admitted in interviews) hate for Bucky... is still wild. They practically dropped his entire character development arc after only hinting at it in an end credit scene. And it's a large part of why Steve's character circled the drain too before getting killed off because the core part of Steve's character arc was dependent on Bucky's story arc actually being continued instead of randomly dropped for multiple back to back crossover events.

Marvel managing to make one decent movie out of CapAm is more of a curse than anything. It'd have been better if expectations never got lifted off the ground and just kept the characters rah rah 🇺🇲 PatriotMonologueBotd all the way through like in the comics, which aren't very good.... at all. If you thought the propaganda is gonna be bad in the upcoming Cap4 movie, the DNC-style patriotism of the Captain America brand becomes is even worse in the comics, and it gets worse to stomach with IRL events making it seem more and more out of touch. Treating the USA flag (and its representatives) as a literary symbol of moral virtue gets more and more ridiculous with each new run of books (like, did you know that a recent run decided to flashback to WW2 just to include a revisionist-fake-history speech about how the Zlonlsts were a large force fighting against the Nazis, whereas IRL the opposite happened). How a single decent adaptation was managed to be pulled out of the source material is still kinda shocking. But now Marvel seems to have remembered that the CapAm brand is meant for their white writers to pull out atrocious political takes via superheroes. Back to tradition!

the fact that writers n directors hate him baffles me bc Winter Soldier is such a good setup but they just let him FLOAT AROUND? A SET PIECE? AN OBJECT OF THE PLOT????? like you MADE HIM THAT WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im convinced that the US military propaganda contracts completely neutered his MCU character bc if u think about it for more than 5 seconds you start coming to Conclusions (didnt WS point out that the US govt hired a bunch of nazi scientists, framed him as JFK's assassin, etc etc etc.....) and they made the decision to just nuke him as a result. Oooh he was just a bad guyyy all alooong SHUT UPPPP hes morally grey even an antihero for a bit but hes not EVIL he is literally the poster boy of being manipulated into doing atrocities for the interests of a greater power and they just. dropped it. on its ass. esp with the stupid Sabra and Zionism bullshit its like ohhh i see we are gearing up for a media push for fascist nationalistic narratives for a draft or more wars and the presence of moral grayness isnt conducive to that so its just cut. got it.

like the Falcon show was........ so clearly cut to erase that moral grayness it made me ill. so ill i even sought out WS' presence in the comics and like you said its just not cutting it even slightly. they flattened him which SUCKS but also they made him UGLY WHICH IM WAY MADDER ABOUT. IF I CANT HAVE HIS MORAL COMPLEXITY WHY DID YOU UNSEXIFY HIMMM

IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE FINANCIAL SENSE BC I WAS ONLINE WHEN PEOPLE WERE FROTHING AT THE MOUTH OVER HIM SO WHYYYYYYYYY DO THEY HIT HIM WITH THE MOST ATROCIOUS WIGS TO EVER BE SEEN IN AN MCU MOVIE IM ILLLLLL

FIRING SQUAD, ELECTRIC CHAIR, THE GALLOWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MULTIBILLION DOLLAR MOVIE AND THEY ONLY GOT HIM SYNTHETIC IM SO SICK!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOOK AT WHAT THEY TOOK FROM US!!!!!!!!!! SNIPPED LIKE A GODDAMN BARBIE , THE AURA!!!! IM SO MAD

i remember being SO excited when civil war came out bc the kind of political thriller feeling of winter soldier was so enrapturing!!!!! it captured me in a way the other MCU films lacked, so to see him stagnate like he has is just mortifying. especially visually. if they wanted to commit to the whole "hair holds memories"/buzz cut to visually separate himself from what he's done then DO IT!!!! dont linger at the threshold then go back to cash in on his old look but done BADLY. i almost wish he got killed off in civil war or shortly after because hes so clearly become a Plot Device instead of a Character and its so disappointing.

sorry for the super long un-art related post but oh my god this gets me so wound up, Bucky/WS was my first brainrot from back in my forum days (had an RP partner who based their character off him).

[shameboree]

ATTIC GOBLIN ?

YEAH SO when we moved in there was like this wadded up pair of pink panties in the basement that hadnt been there a few days before when we did our final walkthrough or whatever right. and then my fuzzy socks would go missing and some leggings and then our fucking FORKS which were DISCONTINUED so we cant even replace them!!!!! also the toilet paper would run out like super fast and i drink A Lot of diet dr pepper so i DO pee a lot but this was just fucken ridiculous!!!!! anyway so our one old roommate suggested ghost but me n polks were like fuck off this is OUR house!!

anyway so one day im slumped down on the couch w earbuds in having a good time and my friend kos comes downstairs to brew his sleepy ass some fresh shit tier coffee at like 5pm on a weekday. tbh i was talking about one of my homebrew blorbos being harassed and having just a great time with it so i didnt want to speak to anyone and just EXTREMELY avoided eye contact n sank as deep as i could into the bigass pillows of our honestly very nice goodwill upper middle class grandma couch. the point of that is when you walk downstairs and turn into the kitchen you cant really see me at this angle and i am DEAD SILENT bc my keyboard was apparently made of marshmallows or smth AND im metal gear box stealth mode trying to not be noticed here so i can talk about my barbies being menaced uninterrupted.

SO because of all that when kos came back downstairs for his coffee which had been brewing for probably not very long but i was in the Blorbo Zone where time is fake so i couldnt in good faith give an estimate he did NOT see me. well while hes in the kitchen puttering around i just start losing my shit on account of my blorbarbies in agonies brings me Such Joys and i think this startled him so bad he has to take a stress shower because i heard the bathroom door SLAM and the water start running. at some point after this polks comes home from work and starts pissed off nagging us over WHO MADE THIS COFFEE MESS IN MY KITCHEN!! kos comes downstairs for the Commotions and apparently the coffee pot was sitting on the counter with some fresh coffees while the rest of it fresh waterfalled all into our silverware and pots n pans spaces HOWEVER!! MYSTERY TIME!! he has not been downstairs since he started brewing his trash sludge.

INTERMISSION: THINGS TO NOTE ABOUT OUR HOUSE: the back door is literally INCHES from the downstairs bathroom. the attic is not a panel or ceiling access its just a door right by all our bedroom doors and it wont latch which was So Annoying bc the cats were UNREASONABLE THIRSTY to get up there so we had to install a loop n hook latch to keep it shut but whichever one of us did that goofed it up pretty bad bc the door is still perpetually cracked open like probably a full inch and a half. id love to take the credit for this but i think it was polks who is absolutely phenomenal at fucking up installations of things. OTHER NOTABLE THINGS ABOUT POLKS: her single biggest fear on this planet is shit like Crawlspace Man. just Some Guy living in your home without you knowing. also we have a dark little crawlspace down in the basement, for ambience

MOVING ON at this point i still dont give a shit about anything happening around me because i am inflicting sufferings upon my from scratch blorbo BUT my brain is putting the pieces together which i then immediately do a toddler vs 1000 piece puzzle it took you a year to assemble and just totally waste that shit from my thinkspace bc i wanna play DOLLS instead. polks and kos are also putting their little pieces together but they are Not braindead dipstick idiots like yours truly so they decide to check the whole haus bottom up, starting with the crawlspace. great news! the crawlspace is empty!! other older news: i def heard the cabinet ruining coffee fuckuper come down from upstairs.

i forgot to mention that for this househunt polks armed herself with our fucking broom and was wielding it handle side out because It Has Reach and a knife would Escalate The Situation. anyway they make their way upstairs and i am doing absolute jackshit nothing to help because, again, i am fucking brain poisoned to prioritize oc cummies over every single thing on this planet. its in my fucking genetic code. so while im fuckin useless theyre up there talking about how fucking weird this is and scuffling around or whatever but the second they go into the attic its dead silent and NOT because they go silent but because the attic is some fucked up sound void and past the first 3 steps you can hear total fuck all from outside. at this point my little toddler brain realizes this puzzle is actually indestructible so when kos and polkie are out of the void audible again i Already Knew i had to start being a fucking adult instead of playing barbies which DID feel like a personal affront.

tbh i dont even remember how polks reacted bc i was so CMON MAN!! at our attic dweller for cucking me bc now i gotta call the fuckin cops AND change the locks AND i still gotta get up at 420 in the mother blessed am for work, so basically this entire stunt was a hate crime against me specifically.

we dont really go in our attic much and never even bothered fetching the cats when they went up there but we HAD been up there before so when i went up there and saw fuckin blankets and takeout containers and also some clothes stuffed into drafty holes it was like, kind of Obvious that yeah some bitch was stealing my forks and not paying rent and eating all my toilet paper and FOR SOME REASON had the audacity to ALSO go ahead and pour out a cup of coffee in BROAD DAYLIGHT while we were OBVIOUSLY HOME. the fucking NERVE!!

so!! thats our Event that i honestly forget happened most of the time. we actually refer to them as Attic Dobby i think on account of my THIEVED socks but then of course attic dobby became sexy dobby as is the natural progression of things. we have many big tity dobbie drawings around the house and we love to show them to guests. i may have lost some forks i cant fucking replace so ill never have a matching set again BUT now my house has so many slutty big tit thong and louboutin adorned dobbys that kos and i have bonded so much over drawing that it all evens out in the end and i definitely dont get mad about the forks ever. less important than dobbys big naturals but still notable: exposure therapy works as polks no longer has the Crawlspace Man Terrors!

[fandxmslxt69]

howdy howdy, can you tell us about your 1920s mafia based character 👀

HOWDY FRIEND!!!

let me just go copy paste my whole character chart bc its SOOO MUCH i cant type it all out

Leila is the daughter of some business man (Moroccan Mafia!!!)  associated with the mafia, and to make good business her father and her man’s father set them up to make business ties!! She just moved back to New York after finishing her studies abroad. She tries to blend into the background and typically doesn’t like drawing attention to herself, but she won’t hesitate to bite if things start getting questionable. She & her man (NAME TO BE DETERMINED) have a sort of like…enemies(ish) to lovers vibe solely because they don’t want to do this fake marriage thing, but she’s ready to protect him fiercely. While she’s kind of just seen as a castaside, she’s been working in the background to get rid of her father and take over his business - she’s slowly managed to turn parts of her father’s business and partners to be on her side and change loyalties. 

She spent all those years away from New York building her own empire slowly, and now she's back - her father may think she agreed to a marriage just out of being clueless obedient little Leila but it's a lot more than that - all her steps are counted for. She only agreed to such a marriage because she knows this man has good connections within the mafia, and she's managed to strike up a good business deal with him!!! get this marriage running, convince people that they make a good powerful duo that can build a successful empire, and get rid of her father. she gets to build her empire and he can help her with it on the business front and get to own some of it!! its all good!!

So ever since she got back and got married, she spent that time attending parties and events to try and win over her father's customers and partners, and strike up new deals that are better and bigger than what her father had, and win over people her father has been chasing after. All of this done because yknow of course she's already built a decent underground on-the-downlow company but she's got the connection to this guy she's now married to which wins points!!

Every time someone mentions this obv to her father he's like "oh please she's just little old Leila. she can't even open a door herself" and she's very good at keeping this role she's playing up. the perfect daughter, the shining wife.

this is a murder mystery duh, so her motive for murder is her ambition. she'd do anything to be better and bigger than her father, and to get rid of him - even if it means needing to kill the wrong people (his close circle/his board of directors/loose ties who can't keep their mouths shut etc)

umm yeah. will my teacher have a HEADACHE reading this bad boy to plot the murder mystery? YES. do i care? NO!!!!!!

she's my #1 girl. umm her man.... is silly too. He's kind of obsessed with her - like yeah they're business partners, but he's so obsessed with her ambition and that obsession leads to falling for her (CREDITS TO @the-lady-amphitrite FOR BEING SOOO SMART TO PIECE THAT TOGETHER.)

anyway

i love her

i;ve talked abt her to like 10 friends and each time im just copy pasting all my rambling onto the character chart to fix her up. she's my bae. thats her whole backstory. :DDDDD

[archeir-a-blog]

♩+ Madzie

Send me [ ♩+ a ship ] and I’ll write a headcanon for them based on the next song that plays.

I’M  CALM,   I’M  CALM,   I’M                 JUST  KIDDING  NO  I’M  NOT !! 

Song:    MEDICINE                by    Daughter

Words  cannot  express  how  much  I  love  Madzie,  oh  lawd.    *  BRACES  SELF  *     Okay  so,  seeing  as  Alec  was  like  the  first  person  to  really  meet  Madzie   &   have  any  kind  of  interaction  with  her,  it’s  obvious  they  have  a  special  bond  /  relationship.    Alec  loves  kids.   

 Madzie’s  the  cutest  kid,   ERGO             Alec  ADORES  Madzie. 

Since  Catarina  is  like  technically  Madzie’s  guardian  now?       And  Iris  was  before  that,  both  have  this  sort  of  connection  to  healing   /   medicine.     Iris  was  a  doctor  and  Catarina’s  a  nurse  lols.       So  I  feel  like  being  around  that  and  other  warlocks  who  use  their  powers  to  heal  people  or  whatever,  Madzie  would  look  up  to  them  in  some  way  and  want  to  imitate  their  abilities?? 

SO  any  time  Alec  comes  by  to  visit    (  because  he  would  when  he  can  )    he’d  play  along  and  pretend  to  be  Madzie’s     patient    as  she  plays   doctor   or  nurse  or  healer  on  him.        And  Madzie’s  pretty  powerful  and  smart  for  her  age  so  I  could  see  her  purposely  doing  something  silly   &   innocent  when  she    “pretends”    to  heal  him,   just  to  mess  with  Alec.         Maybe  she’d  tickle  him  without  touching  him  or  give  him  an  itch  he  can’t  scratch??     Idk,  something  that  makes  her  crack  up   giggling.      She’s  a  child  so         I  feel  like  she   WOULD   find  that  amusing.        And  Alec  wouldn’t  care  because  he  just  enjoys  seeing  her  adorable  little  smile   &   laugh  and  ya’ll   !!!!!!!    I’m  crying  over  it.           BYE

What’s  more  though  is,        some  say  laughter  IS  medicine.     So  even  though  Madzie’s   “pretending”    her  laugh  is  like,   medicine.  

                      MIC DROP  …..    I’M  OUT

[florida3exclamationpoints]

.

[strawberry-possum]

Ahahaha oh no

[lifesucksheres20bucks]

THOUGHTS I HAD FOR EPISODE 8 OF WANDAVISION **spoilers**

Okay here we goooooo

Will i cry

Who knows

OMG PURPLE MARVEL LOGO

AGATHA ORIGIN STORY YES

WITCHES ARE KILLING A WITCH???

Oh betrayal

Katheryn hahn is so gorgeous wtf

They just her stronger im assuming instead of killing her

Yass queen

Eat the souls of the other witches

Just killing everyone

How nice

Just witch things ™️

Is agatha trying to get the gang back together

THE REAL US??

SO SEÑOR SCRATCHY IS SOMEONE

Damn agatha

Fuck i love her

FIETRO

SO WHO IS THIS PERSON

LIKE WJO IS FAKE PIETRO

Is agatha going to teach wanda

Its the feel im getting

Agatha jelly

She wants want wanda has lol

Señor scratchy sus

TO YOUR NOT BROTHER

Dont need to rub it in

This is like the best of marvel, i swear

WHERE ARE THE BOYS

FLASHBACKS OMG

OMG HER PARENTS

OMG LITTLE PIETRO

LITTLE WANDA

OMG THEY DID HAVE MALCOM

She wanted to be like the shows

Omg bro i didnt want to see her origin story

This is breaking my heart

THE STARK BOMB

I stg if we see the real pietro imma cry

SOKOVIA

HYDRA

Wanda needs a hug and therapy

I want to give her a hug

My god poor thing

I love this origin story but man my heart

OMG THE SCARLET WHICH APPEARED TO HER WHEN SHE GOT HER POWERS

Wtf

Omggggg

So she had the right huh...mutation if you will, to get the powers

CIVIL WAR WANDA

Vision just wants to help :’)

VISION LOOKED AT US AGAIN WHY

Girl is depressed

She needs therapy.

Vision :’))))))

My fucking heart

Why am i crying

GIRL BOSS

GOING TO GET HER MAN

SAVING THE CORPSE

She just wanted a funeral for her mans

Wanda’s head tilt is so powerful lol

Hayward can die

I’m his next of kin :(((((

HOW ARE THEY CHOPPING THROUGH VIBRANIUM

SENTIENT WEAPON FUCK OFF

OMG HAYWARD U MANIPULATING BITCH

SHE JUST WANTED TO BURRY HIM AND HE MANIPULATED HER

HE WAS WAITING FOR HER TO TAKE HIM

WHAT A SCUMBAG

She cant feel him anymore:((((((((((

I HOPE WANDA KILLS HAYWARD

SHE LEFT?????

Im so confused

WHY IS SHE IN WESTVIEW

THEY BOUGHT A HOUSE FOR THEMSELVES BEFORE HE DIED

THE NOTE I CANT

HOW DID SHE RECREATE HIM IF HES STILL IN THE LAB

Im so confused

Katheryn hahn can step on me

IS SHE GOING TO EXECUTE THE TWINS

CHAOS MAGIC YES

SCARLET WITCH

OMG THEY SAID IT

SCARLET WITCH

ITS THE FIRST TIME IT GOES INTO WANDAS EYE IN THE POST CREDIT SCENE

ITS USUALLY VISIONS EYE

WHAT HAPPENED TO MONICA AND PIETRO

Or fietro

THEY MADE VISION

BUT WHITE VISION

Like in the fucking comics

HOLY SHIIIIIIT

were in for a fucking ride next week.

ARE WE GOING TO GET A FIGHT BETWEEN REAL VISION AND WHITE VISION?????????????

BC I SAW PROMOS WE HAVENT SEEN YET WHERE VISION AND WANDA ARE DEFENDING THEIR HOME AND VISION IS STILL THERE

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR VISIONS FUTURE??? WILL THEY BE ABLE TO REVIVE THE REAL VISION ???

wtf happened to monica and pietro from last weeks post credit scene?????

i still have questions on fietro! did she take another human and made him believe he was pietro or did she create him???

bc if its the first one maybe it is peter from x-men???

also hayward can die

i want vision or wanda to murder hayward

so bad

omg i can’t believe we got white vision i saw a theory but didn’t think it would happen holy fuck

also the twins :(((( i hope they gonna be okay

katheryn hahn can step on me

also according to my calculations all 8 of these episodes total 5 hours and we were promised 6h so my guess the last episode is going to be an hour long (lets say 45mins of actually show time and not 15 minutes of credits lol)

HOLY FUCK

[luvargas]

     i think i just saw LUCILA “ LU ” VARGAS ride by on a golf cart . at least i think it was her . after all , CREDIT IN THE STRAIGHT WORLD BY HOLE was blasting on the transistor radio . maybe she was on her way to work , i hear she’s a PERSONAL TRAINER . but she totally could have been on her way to SNEAK IN A SMOKE AT THE GARDEN . guess we’ll never know . you’ll definitely know its her when you see LOOSE AND TANGLED HAND WRAPS , BUTTON BADGES ON VEGAN LEATHER ,  AND HEAR THE SHRILL SOUND OF BICKERING around the country club . let’s just hope she stays off the green after hours or else the sprinklers will get her !

( new muse, messy thoughts, u get the gist. pls know the views of this chara do not reflect my own. the name’s katya, 21, she/her pronouns & im ready 2 party. feel free to hmu wnvr or drop a like to plot n ill com 2 u ! x — oh n pls be a pal n read this quick disclaimer. tysm ! )

BASICS

24 years old

15 april 1997

5′1″ or 1.55m tall

bisexual cis woman, she/her

aries sun, aqua moon, and aqua rising

love languages : quality time & acts of service

BIO POINTS

kid o’ divorce, lived w her ma in chicago til she was 6 then w her dad in highlands til 14 then back to her ma ! 

def a daddys gorl. so used to her white pop’s leniency that livin w her strict latina ma durin her teen yrs was So Not Her Vibe ergo * cue her rebel grrrl phase *

did not finish hs ! left senior yr 2 to go w her “ radically progressive ” college bf to [ insert dev country. ] they broke up after a few mos but she kept at that life for a couple more yrs

seen some places. lived in new countries. done some shit. some good, some sus, but all generally well-intentioned. tis a whole thing but u get the gist, nywy !

lu’s back in da usa by 21. rel w the ma is strained but the pa is chill w stuff, they kept in touch. he said shell get her college fund if she gets her ged so she does !

her dad is v active n stuff so shes just always been v sporty w him. lu turnin 23 w zilch plans worried him so he implored her to get certified as a personal trainer ! n when she did, he called in a few favors w a pal he knows et voilà ! ur hired.

LU AT WORK

shes been workin at the country club fr a little over a yr now. most her clients are influencer-type gals n they luv her bc shes can take rlly cute pics n stuff for content. lu sorta likes some of em n she fakes the rest for the bread. u can bet she clowns all em richies behind their back   

unless she got clients, catch her runnin’ about the club n minglin’ w the other workers. does it annoy mngmt ? yes. n she luvs that. but bc her soon-2-b-karen clients luv her n wont stand for her bein booted, she can milk that impunity

actually knows her shit n lowkey rlly enjoys the work. she picked back up the boxing n tae kwon do she did when she was younger plus she was always in the track team at school. v healthy lifestyle save for her smokin vice n the party moments

PERSONALITY 

passionate ! has lotsa opinions. helluva a drama queen, bit of a loud mouth, argumentative n stubborn but her heart’s in the right place, albeit a lil misguided. comes w the whole activist bit, bitin her tongue just aint it. highkey makes everythin political n smtms gotta realize .,.,. it just aint that deep chief. some say shes needlessly defiant, but maybe thats a in the beholder typa thing ? fingers crossed 4 lu’s sake

fun, fun, fun ! can be real naggy but shes no buzzkill. wannabe anarchist-slash-mutineer who wants 2 stick it 2 the man ! get rowdy go crazy

fight, fight, fight ! goin back to the first bit, she talks big. esp w like ,, men n the whites lol. she can actually walk her threats tho she isnt actually violent. w arguments, she likes to start em but finishin is ... ruff.  also any dare, she wont back down in either doin it or arguin why doin it wld be smth-ist. shes not the sharpest tool ok rip lu

loyal legend ! fr her friends n buds, shell turn a blind eye. pals r the only exception ! truly ride or die n will do errthng 4 em. v much a believer in the power of community n ppl needin ppl or wtvr, yk, all that stuff. shes mouthy but like, she helps ppl 

here’s a brief blurb n a more coherent look into lu as a character

TIDBITS

lu can understand spanish but hers is a bit broken, tis her secret shame shhh

she doesn’t believe in the institution. any institution. u name it, shes got beef

pls dont fact check her she cant hear u

probs lowkey thinks shes better than u bc shes vegan

prefers 2 be called “ lu ” n ny1 who insists on lucila is dead 2 her 

comments abt her not lookin like a pt w her height n frame will result in an earful n a dramatic outburst. it aint worth it chief

watches lotsa sports w her pops. mostly indiv ones. mma, boxing, tennis, track, etc

dont ask me abt her principles n politics, i cant explain em either. v inconsistent n just messy at this point tbh but here’s a lil attempt ig

she drives a 2018 prius n lives in a p nice 1br apt outside the club

her mom’s middle class n her dad is almost upper-middle class. he isnt a member of the club but, like ,,, he cld be if he wanted to lol. he spoils her sm while she hasnt rlly Spoken to her mom besides civility, rip they both stubborn, tis a vargas thing

she is v much in a comfy position money-wise n dsnt hav much Need to hustle but sis does hav a couple of organizations she regularly sends some dough to so thats nice ig

she went fr grassroots activist to a veteran twitter/tumblr/reddit/wtvr ranter n a change.org gofundme petition regular. is it burnout ? is she ok ? honestly who knows

WANTED CONNECTIONS / TAKEN CONNECTIONS

found family ! pals n squad wanted. y’all gotta hav patience or ear plugs to power thru her self-indulgent mini-rants but shell luv ya back tenfold !

carpool buds ? cld be a pal ! or maybe yall had a lil argument or small beef but lu still drives ym bc her pride ? said mother earth first even tho the tension n silly drama is funny 

homies to smoochies ! just sum nsa makin out. cld be pals, cld be flirty, idk, but if u wanna kiss her shes probs ok w that

smoke bud ! just sum1 thats her go-to 2 smoke w on her breaks. knows not to call her out on how its not healthy fr a trainer yada yada she knows ok. let her live

an ex ? idk yet shes not rlly datey but thats out there

crushes ! this bitch hot but does she know how to flirt ? not rlly. watch her fumble

debate club ! aka sum1 she bickers w relentlessly. its valid, sum1 fite her. r u a worker or a club member ? either works. its a whole club bc she can have tons, lu can be hella annoying n testy

clients ! self-explanatory. do they get along tho ? lets find out ! 

( im officially braindead now but if y’all got more ideas or think theres smth lu wld fit just lmk !!! down 4 wtvr, wld luv 2 hash it out w yall <3 ) 

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issues 4&5

its delphi time babey

I'm sorry but drift & co look like such fuckin nerds on their scooter things on the cover lmaooo

oh god. seeing the first page just reminded me of how horribly confused i was for this whole little arc the first time i read it. i was like ok, who are all these new characters, and also why does everyone look so similar

anyways now i now what's going on. i love first aid

love the running continuity of rung being the literal only psychologist on cybertron (except for fr*id but that's later). no wonder everyone's fucked up they all have to share a single therapist 

ok i find it extremely funny that first aid was demoted from doctor to nurse, as if that's a thing that happens EVER - I mean it'd be one thing if first aid was a nurse practitioner (which i doubt is a position that exists here), at least that demotion would make sense, but like...the doctors i work with don't know how to do most nurse stuff (like BP, cathing, vaccinations, hell even using some of the thermometers - that's all stuff nurses/etc do), so demoting one to a nurse would be a disaster (just like promoting a really good nurse to a doctor would be a bad idea). anyways i know I'm being pedantic but it Be like that when you work in the medical field and read something that has medicine-related stuff in it

i love swerve giving ratchet the tiniest free drink ever lmaooo

is that skids being a rowdy drunk in the bg lmaoooo

unironically i love medical statistics. keep it comin

i love magnus’s giant sternal chestpiece thing. its like a bird’s sternum but without the massive pec muscles attached 

i love magnus and rodimus’s dynamic so much

oh pipes....im so sorry but this fun space adventure is going to be not so much fun for you

ratchets ideologies are certainly interesting, and i liked seeing how they changed over the course of the story

drift: why would i be SCARED of the DJD, I've got a SWORD, two swords even,

hvbhajkhfbsdjkf pipes really said ‘oi, you two - what's this, then?’ that's the most british fucking thing, that's literally something i say when I'm doing an overexaggerated british accent, oh my god,

PIPES IS SUCH A TINY DUMBASS. ILY SIR BUT WHAT ARE YOU DOING

aaaand now you're covered in dead bodies, pipes. look at your life, look at your choices

drift epic sword moments

drift confirmed for the kinda weird guy who has katanas that he uses to like, cut up fruit and water bottles in his backyard while rodimus films him

‘i thought i heard...bickering’ lmaooooo

ah, so its covid

this arc is how i feel working in healthcare lmaooo especially now that i probably have covid 

so rewind condensed the entire war into an 11 second long cringe compilation. nice

seeing the mechanical stuff past tailgate’s visor is so cool

poor tailgate, this guy is getting slammed with history from multiple sides. and like, bias is inevitable in ANY sort of recounting of events, especially controversial historical events, so poor tg just kinda has to take it all in and decide who to listen to 

that’s...not really how immunity works, guys. also, you shouldn't be exposed to so much disease with proper ppe usage

is there even such thing as ppe in the transformers universe?? there are fluid- and contact-transmitted illnesses, so there SHOULD be

is there even OSHA in this universe??????? unbelievable 

first aid, holding a giant fucking claw clamp: we haven't tried EVERYTHING............

first aid read a human wikihow article on how to jumpstart a car and took notes 

i love tailgate’s ‘mom says its my turn on the xbox’ pose 

tailgate has a point - he’s from pre-war times, where things weren't as grey so of course he would try to divide the two sides into ‘good guys’ and ‘bad guys’

CYCLONUS BE NICE DONT HIT UR FUTURE HUSBAND

go get some character development and then maybe you'll feel better

seeing the word quarantine is making me twitchy w/my possible month-long complete isolation quarantine on the horizon

drift pulling his swords on pipes and ratchet pushing down drift’s arms...lmao

poor pipes...even tho this is completely his fault, its still rough

also jesus, pharma and ratchet look so goddamn similar, reading this was so confusing the first time around 

drifts idea of subduing pipes involves turning into a cool car and also posing with his sword

also. never gonna be over drift’s massive thighs. jesus man

ooof now drift has the rona. ouch 

poor drift, his covid realization is getting overshadowed by pharma being flung around

first aid bustin thru w/the epic medical nipple clamps and some Big Boi Backup

ok that's an epic pre-beatdown speech from fort max right there, daym 

im just gonna continue on w/issue 5 now for continuity’s sake. yay!

the cover of tailgate in magnus’s autobot school is so cute

and we open with an incredible shot of fort max str8 up ripping a guy in half. i mean, to be fair, he DID just give an epic speech about how much he was gonna do that, and he certainly followed thru

yeahhhhh, fort max is not doing so well atm

when he puts that dudes head in his chest vent thing and then snaps it shut....man 

also i fucking LOVE when their faces are shaded all in black w/only the eyes/mouth fully drawn...fantastic stuff

ratchet: phew i am not equipped to deal w/this level of Fucked Up Mental Trauma. u good m8?

ratchet is already writing up a referral to rung for fort max as this is happening

drift is just laying on the ground dying like, oh hey yeahh I'm still here too 

i fucking love when punctuation is drawn in story - like here where first aid has a little ? over his head....fav

ratchet holding drifts hand ;_; 

ok tbh ambulon having switched sides 10 yrs ago is wild bc like, 10 years is barely any time for these guys, especially in a war that lasted 4 million years. that would be like a human switching sides in a war like, 3 months before it ends. probably. i sense some math bs, I'm just extrapolating here

all that mexican standoff shit is going down and first aid is just like But That's None Of My Business

ah so ambulon is an asymptomatic carrier 

and there's first aid with the save! iconic

pharma calling ratchet ‘buddy’ hbvakjdsbfhkasdf

ooooh i love that they figured it out - and i love that twist, that transforming is what triggers the start of symptoms. remember when drift turned into a cool car? yep

s/o to Ambulon Transformers for helping me in my medical terminology courses, bc now ill always remember: Leg(tm)

also this explanation makes a ton more sense (in universe, at least) than the whole ‘i guess we as medical staff have been exposed to enough Germz that we’re more immune to this or something’ theory 

ah, i love the meaningless (to me) alien robot medical jargon 

drift and ratchet hhhhhhhhh

‘I'm too wide’ fort max L O R G E

also once again drift is forgotten in favor of a bunch of other dramatic stuff happening vbhjksdfbjhskdf

godddd i love tailgates little flashbacks where we see how Important and Special he is, complete with his ‘bomb disposal’ arm label...augh its so good! 

and tailgate’s autopedia page even reflects his lies! like, did tailgate go edit that first thing upon waking up??? seriously, I'm fascinated by tailgate’s meticulous dedication to his fake life

also the fact that ultra magnus believes everything he read on autopedia is amazing lmao

ultra magnus: you think somebody would just go on the internet and tell lies? 

fuckgin love magnus’s long ass name/title placard 

tailgate hvbahjkdfbjhaskf i mean, he’s gotten the abridged version of everything else, of course he would assume that’d be the case here too...but not on magnus’s watch

magnus cant even say ‘fun’ hvukdasdbjfkjsadf i love my uptight law dad

love rung implying that upon questioning, he would easily divulge a patient’s name and maybe even information about said patient’s treatment while under him....love the disregard for patient confidentiality and hipaa in general 

not that hipaa seems to exist here, at least not in a fully realized form 

also i mean the above genuinely, i think rung’s tendency towards at least slight malpractice is very interesting 

poor red alert....super bad luck that HE was the guy to get roped up in that overlord business 

I'm glad that, at the very least, red alert was able to prove that he was Actually hearing something to rung, rather than get brushed off completely 

god magnus and tailgate’s interactions are golden 

also tg is much more sarcastic/quippy than anyone gives him credit for tbh

‘thought warfare,’ ultra magnus says with complete seriousness. god i fucking love this comic

now i can tell pharma apart from ratchet bc pharma has let his true Petty Bitch nature emerge and you can see it in his expressions

the whole ‘tarn is addicted to transforming’ thing didn't really go anywhere, right? i feel like i noticed that on my second readthru as well 

also pharma is such an interesting character given the context of him like, trying to strike a bargain w/the djd to keep them from destroying delphi, but that arrangement inevitably kinda making him lose it as the situation escalates. he’s also just really entertaining bc i feel like he kins the joker or st and probably gets into really heated arguments w/people on twitter about just abt anything

‘sound bomb’ i love this comic

another important facet of pharma’s character becomes clear around this time as well - how he’s really into ratchet. i also choose to read them as awful exes tbh, it makes their dynamic even more entertaining

‘killmaster, with the wand’ is one of my favorite running remarks lmao

also, was killmaster even a character before mtmte? or, if he was, was he an important one? it would crack me up the most if he literally didn't exist at all, but any way you spin it is still funny 

ratchet’s tiny humansona facing off against pharma is wild

‘I'm miles from anyone i truly care about’ brutal, ratchet, drift is dying like 2 floors away (im p sure)

SUDDENLY DRIFT IS HERE, ACTUALLY 

oh don't worry first aid, that sure isn't the last we’ll be seeing of pharma 

so like, did first aid save everyone by posting that data log to his wreckers fan blog or something? lmao love it 

i love the pretty fucked up reveal of ratchet having stolen pharma’s hands. like, damn dude. 

and that wraps up the delphi arc! our first true ‘arc’ of mtmte, and a fantastic one at that. short and snappy and fresh, with some very clever writing and cool new characters, and a lot of great plot threads to be picked up later. plus, we got to see the beginnings of drift and ratchet’s whole thing (and ratchet and pharmas whole thing). and the lost light gets some much needed extra medical staff, so everyone wins! 

well, we’ll see how fort max feels about this all pretty soon.....

[ohcnnes]

☢      —     ( LILI REINHART, CIS WOMAN, SHE/HER )     Trading in their scrunchies for gauze bandage rolls might not come easy for ANNE MILTON. This twenty six year old midwife brings medical knowledge, quick thinking and ex-gymnast fitness to the table … but their softness and unwillingness to kill could drag the group down. And while their nurturing nature might raise group morale, their over-thinking might give them a few enemies. That’s the last thing anyone needs right now. Hopefully, in the apocalypse movie that’s now their life, this BLEEDING HEART will make it to the end credits.     ( SAM, 23, SHE/HER, AEST )

OOC.

hello m’ladies, m’gents, and m’neithers my name is sam and this is written at either 1am or 5:30am because im australian and an idiot so pls forgive if there are any super dooper obvious spelling mistakes. anyways some fun facts: i’m an ex film student that now works in a pet store. i’m a whore for ari aster but i hope he goes to therapy or else i think he desperately needs to. 

i’ve played a few iterations of anne before but never something like this and i am so, so, so excited. i will probably never speak in the group chat because i have Social Anxiety(TM) and i am Intimidated By All Of You(TM) but i swear i am friendly pls come talk to me lmao

STATS.

full name: anne marie milton

best known as: anne

age: twenty six

occupation: midwife/registered nurse at a public hospital

star sign: virgo

trope: the bleeding heart

traits: diligent, nurturing, loyal, kind, intelligent, empathetic, meticulous, critical, over-thinking, jealous, anxious, clingy, secretive, overly trusting

drink / smoke / drugs: yes / no / no

MORE INFO.

born and raised in fort elm, she’s the middle child of three with an older sister and a younger brother. the three were raised mainly by their mother after their father passed fighting in the vietnam war when all the children were relatively young

as a result anne has a mother complex. idk if thats a thing but im making it one. she mothers everyone and feels like needs to look after everyone she knows, protect them, help them. hence the obvious move into the nursing/midwifing career

growing up she was pretty popular, like she’s friendly and charming and then on top of that a hot blonde that did gymnastics and cheerleading what do u want from me. was also an over achiever and perfectionist– has severely calmed down since she was in high school but i think she is still a perfectionist at heart like come on she’s a virgo

she sometimes comes off as fake but istg she is that much of a people pleaser. will try to be friends with everyone and obv has huge mom friend/big sister energy

believes in giving everyone a shot and it takes a lot of fucking her over for her to decide she doesn’t like you but even then if u came to her and said u had changed once she’d be like OK HERE U GO ANOTHER CHANCE LUV U 

a big romantic/emotional whore. loves love but always feels like she’s letting people down/not doing enough in relationships so ends up breaking them off before they go too far. and then gets in another relationship fairly quickly bc she just be like that

also giving her a labrador and u cant stop me xx

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

friends: dear god please be her friend she will do anything for u. would love friends from high school, maybe people that didn’t like her/the people she hung out with in high school and they have since become friends, bad influence friends (anne will mother extra hard but also get drunk around), ex-romances turned friends, toxic friendships that should have ended by now but havent, anne would legit try and make friends with rocks if she could so literally anyone could be her friend

romance ended ugly: ok i want one angsty thing sue me im human. the relationship that went too far before anne ended things so when she eventually did it hurt more and seemed more out of no where and anne prob got defensive and mean solely so they wouldn’t fight for it but still prob has so much love for them bc idk yall she got some issues anyways gimme 🤲

hook ups, ex-romances, roommates, people who dislike her (maybe someone she dislikes back but we would truly have to talk about it and figure out a juicy plot bc it takes a lot), party friends, dead ass anything lets go girls 

[pk-majora]

sorry guys just had to get some stuff out and off my chest. 

just impulsively quit the job i was really enjoying through text, probably going to skip class again too almost guaranteed to not make this months payments on my credit cards. got into some really heated fights with my entire family while carving pumpkins and ruined the whole night. debated downing a bottle of oxys (dont worry didnt take any and their away from me now). just a rough time for my mental health. and whats sucks is im trying to talk to my mother about it and shes just like youre lazy and spoiled none of this mentally ill bullshit. god what the fuck is wrong with me. i just, i cant control my emotions. and even now typing up this post on social media like im just asking myself if its all a call for attention or clout or some bullshit like ive been told so much that im just faking it that like im almost starting to believe it and hate myself for that? i think how much weed ive been smoking and the fact i recently quit my birth control AND im also on my period are definitely agitating it but like god i just feel so like emotionally heavy and miserable and i have for such a long long time. its just like whats the point? im not beautiful. im not remarkably intelligent. i dont even have a great personality or sense of humor. so rarely am i all there mentally either, im constantly zoned out or dissociating. i have one real friend and i treat her like shit sometimes. im just so selfish and always tired. i regret wasting almost 4 years of my life on a bachelors degree i dont want anymore. ill never have a job making real money. and all i can think about, because all my mother wants to remind me of, is that so many people have it worse than me. And then top all of this off with whats going on politically and environmentally and its just like honestly what is there to live for? and my environment sucks we live in this tiny ass house and we have 11 dogs. and my mom took two years off to fight for disability which she had every right to do since she IS disabled but the bill duty came down on me and suddenly i was a fulltime student parttime employee literally paying car payments and house bills and shit and i just think it was too much adulting for me all at once. and she didnt even end up getting disability which was such a painful moment for the family. so now shes working a part time job she hates and we arent even able to pay all our monthly bills. god as im typing this my manager from the job tried calling me and i feel like such a coward i cant even answer the call. i just sent a message earlier like hey had a personal family emergency thats affecting my mental health, will have to terminate my employment to deal with this but like longer and more polite. and my entire family is against me. my sister hates me. my dad hates me. and now the last two i felt i had, my mom and brother hate me too bc of the meltdown i had while carving pumpkins. and they think the entire breakdown was just bc my pumpkin didnt come out alright. i just... i want to be able to make it to all my classes AND have a job and be able to enjoy things again and i just cant. i cant do any ONE of those things. idk i just had to get this down somewhere. im trying so hard to get help but i cant find a therapist who takes our insurance, is close by, and has any availability even within this year. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist later this month but at this rate i really dont know if ill make it. 

[cleaduvalls]

i watched all 20 episodes of "spy kids: mission critical" twice in about a week and here are my thoughts (pt 1/5)

these will be divided into 4 episodes per post so they stay about the same length as one spy kids movie

1.1

no theme song. :/

wow specific location

wow. we love lying to our spouses

greg actually kind of sounds like greg??? like ingrids not right in the slightest but greg sounds like greg

oh yeah i call him greg instead of gregorio bc thats Too Many Syllables

i dunno id rather go on an adventure

oh!!!!! ingrids hair!!!!! cute

they look like friggin iron knuckles from cadence of hyrule

how do you..... classify a move

also why would they teach agents to counter a move that they also taught the agents

dont you mean SWAT

is that tom kenny?????

thats not carmen. i dont care WHAT you say. thats not carmen

shes 14???

since when can he build???

since when do they LIVE at the oss?????

thats a ball. not a blob

oh mood

juni your voice is so squeaky

Every Villain Is Lemons

is this a separate universe????? we already know about the third brain program. and you cant claim that people havent seen the movies cuz theyre ALSO on netflix

the experiment wasnt FUTILE it actually went really well. yall are just cowards

you can destroy gold???? like its not DIAMOND

ew

did golden brain go through childhood??? or did he just.... spawn as an adult????

alliteration

take a wild guess carmen

why are you wearing jeans in the DESERT????

"sis"??? who says that

oh boy fart jokes already

little brothers, cuz youre younger, were related, and youre boys

did you mutate the agents too?????

oh i feel you juni

oh boy butt jokes

carmen youre 14. where im from you COULD have a job at certain places

is he... gonna kill them?????

oh!!!! the mimicking is back!!!

theres no way you had taco butte in the last 5 minutes

teenagers?????? the franchise is spy KIDS get it right

there SHOULD be, yall are licensed spy kids

roll credits

juni stop trying to be a lone wolf it never works youve seen all 4 spy kids

i want to be her

are you.... knighted?????? or are you just british

hes like 11 what do you expect from him

ahavschaj acemate

carmens FACE she looks HIGH

finger guns???? hes bi

THUMB THUMB!!!!!!!

TOM thumb thumb!!!!!!

F L O O P!!!!!!!!!

nvm i want to be HER

im sorry how the H*CK did you just say fegan???????????

piercings!!!!!

and i OOP-

aztec???? bc the aztec death spiral??? nice

maybe im a little biased bc floop but shes my favorite

why are the parents here

who calls it a cuddle bear?????? its a teddy bear what are yall on

oh i love carmens socks

i gotta say im living for goldies aesthetic

haha coward

to be fair hes from the outback, they have friggin emus. those things are creepy

:0 sneaky

nice timing

1.2

wow ig there really is no theme song :(

how can he sleep with a TEACUP

i think at some point youd just... fall asleep????

wow big flex

and i OOP-

scorpions so mean i love her

for like 3 seconds that animation looked like a friggin barbie movie

i thought thumb thumbs couldnt hold things???? like thats their whole point

did she hang up on them?????

when your mom said she wouldnt get mad if you tell the truth so you tell the truth and she still gets mad

K A N Y E?????????

oh no they all have died

drowning a chainsaw????????

PLENTY OF PEOPLE

my parents whenever im tired

did you not hear her name shes clearly immortal

me

stop yelling

at that point he shoudknt have even been able to drink the milk

why are the spotlights on carmen

*2 hours later*

dont put the phone on the desk????? have you not have a teacher give you detention for that????? i have

i think its pretty obvious what he was dreaming about

in the subtitles the u has the dots but hes not pronouncing it right. it should be more "keurp-ka-kay", not just "coop-ka-kay"

everyone has weird dreams????? step off ace

class lasted for 5 minutes wtf

do the three of them share a phone???? thats what it says in her contacts

ok visage thats a little too far

i hate this dude so much

visage shes allowed to be on her phone shes not in class

psi???? like earthbound????

😔

theyre not wrong

STOP YELLING

thats?? not possible?????? youre just weak

why are you saying that out loud

dude stop im dying of second hand embarrassment

wait the sign with the transcribed words doesnt have the ü. so how he pronounced it WAS right they just messed up the subtitles

i thought there was only ONE of its kind why do they EACH have one?????

why did so many people lose????? it seems pretty straightforward

also i love her ringtone

is that tom kenny again??????

thats.... not how it works

he should not have made that

so the big reveal is that it was his mom, but how does he know shes a cortez now?????? she was avellan at that point

take a wild guess

spurious??????? why are you using his first name

i dont???? think you can????????

1.3

the beats pretty good, im tapping my feet

i love his voice

thats not disco thats TECHNO

actually discos probably right. hes german and in germany clubs are called diskos. the music hes playing is pretty clubby, therefore it would be disco

she has spotify premium???? nice

ooooh scorpion has bed curtains!!!!

why do both cortezes have the floor bed???

how can juni hear aces music???? did his headphones get unplugged????? is it just super loud?????

sounds more like kids music than folk music

HOLY CRAP HES LISTENING TO THE WIGGLES (no offense to the wiggles)

yes hes a heavy sleeper we discussed this last time

he has a bazooka you might wanna run

"carmen is not here" me too carmen, me too

glitch chill

oh yay piss jokes

how does so much stuff come out on the floss

she was asleep???????? take it easy glitch

creative name

also the music sounds like it came right out of cadence of hyrule??????? which could be possible bc the girl who voices glitch also voiced link

glitch its clearly a virus

carmen you can go, psi can handle this

hes so protective of his records im dying

BAHAHA she said "worm?" and ofc my dumb ass thought she meant worm as in "oh worm?"

1.4

i had a whole bunch but tumbr decided to delete it and i dont wanna rewrite it so we missed the last 4 minutes of 1.3 and the first 8 of 1.4, sorryyy

it doesnt matter anyway no ones gonna read this

this whole point system was in the fourth movie, get some new plot points

is that really a good idea carmen???

throwback to when i was a kid and wanted to learn australian

oh no they died

JUNI NO YOU SAID IN THE THIRD MOVIE TO N E V E R SPLIT UP

sheilas a great name shut up

listen i see mirages all the time in the summer but how do you see a fake building???? its always a puddle of water

yeah the outback STEAKHOUSE

you sound like youre on crack

oh no he died

one time i ate a bug bc i thought it was some leftover dorito i had stuck in my teeth

hes pretty good at shelters, did you not see the second spy kids???

hey he calles him juni!!!

s n e a k y

what even is heat rash?????

STOP YELLING

nice STEALTH you tell him he has nice STEALTH

[superemeralds]

fanon shadow beef

[ I’m going to ramble about headcanon shit and stuff that I see done out of character in fanon in no particular order. This might be very chaotic so bare w me. ]

Everyone else: 

Shadow uses guns on a regular basis. 

He is not repulsed by guns. 

Shooting is one of his hobbies. 

He probably owns at least one gun and keeps it at home.

 Me: 

Shadow is very uneasy around firearms and avoids using them at all costs. 

The sound of gunshots (and similar loud sounds) makes him flinch. 

(On new years he retreats into his cabin in the woods so e doesn’t have to hear the fireworks.)

There’s very obvious reasons for that yall.

He avoids demands to "do his job cleaner" by using guns. 

Shadow is for gun control and strongly advocates for making it illegal for private households to own and store guns.

He Hates Guns. 

He. Hates. Guns. 

The reason he joined GUN despite it being a very triggering environment is because he has the mindset that he has to endure exactly this to overcome it.

+ he has to make sure that GUN doesn't go down that path again. You all know what I mean (and we all know that they will) 

After all this time, the commander from ShTH and Shadow made up, after covering up all misunderstandings and acknowledging they were both young and heavily manipulated back then. For the short while that this commander is still in charge Shadow has great faith that GUN will take a good turn, which is what moved him to join (they probably discussed it at the dinner that the commander (canonically!) invited him to with his family.

Additionally, he wants access to their data bank to learn as much as he can about the planet and secrets that governments might have. 

He never obeys his orders without question and often breaks rules and opposes GUN, sabotaging missions and just generally doing his thing while using his status in the organization to get what he wants. 

Due to his position and the sheer fact that he is the ultimate life form (and way too valuable to not be “under GUN’s control”) the authorities can’t punish him in any way for his betrayals and kinda get used to it.

God I have So Much Beef with the wiki page for him lmao lemme just. :)

<< Shadow also has a ruthless and merciless edge in combat that all other characters in the series lack, and displays a natural "killer instinct". >>

He only intended to kill Sonic in SA2 because he was blinded by rage and he planned to destroy the entire planet anyways.

I hate when people call shadow merciless and murderous and “killer instinct”... That’s not him...

He was TRAINED to be like this but that’s not who he really is.

Of course that learned behaviour isn’t easily unlearned, even if he cant remember when and how he learned it, but he has his own morals, too, and he is very very much against senseless death. If he can prevent it, he sure as fuck will do all he can do to save a life.

In Shadow’s eyes life is precious, something extraordinary. He promised to Maria to protect it, and he, himself, thinks of it as something worth protecting. Its true that he has a lot of trouble to accept his own feelings and thoughts as important and valuable, but that is due to the way he was raised. 

(as an experiment that is not treated like it has its own will, he was constantly told to comply in experiments, but they never even bothered to tell him what this was all for or engage in deeper conversation with him; as we can see in SA2 when shadow talks to Maria about how confused he is about his purpose of existence.)

More than enough I see him frown or be disgusted or just. plain angry at nothing in particular in fanart. (or the evil bloody murder type of character... or him proudly holding guns or shit :)))))) Hm... )

There’s a difference between an angry face and a person that just doesn’t smile as neutral expression. like… there just are people who have a neutral expression but look unhappy because their mouth naturally rests in a ^ position instead of a - or a v …

<< In the original Japanese version, where Shadow omits honorifics and speaks highly of himself (if not rudely), though contrasting this, in Japanese he normally uses the "boku" pronoun when referring to himself as opposed to the more arrogant/confident "ore" pronoun (which characters such as Sonic use). >>

okay so the difference between boku and ore is that ore is VERY casual and mostly used when talking to someone you are close to, or when you're just really sure of yourself. Boku is a pronoun used mostly by young boys or when someone speaks humbly abt themselves.

And I don’t know how this confuses anyone, since Shadow did grow up on a fucking space station and that’s all he’s known, and he was probably treated like a child, even when he was grown up. Plus, Shadow might be a little arrogant and think very highly of himself (which he mostly does because all his life he was taught that he is a very special and superior life form, mind you), he still very much respects whoever else he is talking to, and he doesn’t take credit for his powers or the things that make him special. He’s the “it’s not a big deal” kind of guy. And he doesn’t mean it in a derogatory way, he means it in a way, that he doesn’t want to trouble the other person.

Making the other person believe that he has everything under control and that he’s okay gives them a sense of security in tense situations, which can be vital to success. 

The way he interact with people might come off as rude and arrogant, but he does act with the best intents for the people around him. It’s just that even when his intent is well, his thoughts might be destructive rather than productive. (for example him thinking his feelings don’t matter and bottling them up.)

<< On occasion, Shadow appears to have some degree of mental instability. This is demonstrated by his instances of post-traumatic flashbacks to Maria's face prior to and during the events of Shadow the Hedgehog, though it could be argued that they were simply an effect of his amnesia. >>

whoever wrote this please eat a cactus

PTSD is not a joke and it’s definitely not just amnesia induced stress.

I remember seeing someone repost a gif of Shadow looking around anxiously shortly before having a flashback and saying how “cute” it is how “observant” and “jumpy” he is……

Those are PTSD symptoms and I hate how people make them the joke of a comic oftentimes. Sure these people could be uninformed but im just… Think a little more about it before making this shit up bc it physically hurts to see.

<< In Sonic Forces, it's heavily implied that Shadow ruthlessly slaughtered an entire mercenary band not only in an extremely dismissive, nonchalant manner (not even remembering the incident a few months later), but also seemed slightly proud, mocking the mercenary defence squad by saying they themselves needed a defence squad. >>

Sonic forces can fuck off its bad writing and it’s not shadow.

I made a comic showing what REALLY happened in episode shadow because *rolls eyes* sega doesn’t know their own characters.

[ read it here ]

Shortly summarized and in reference to what I said before: Shadow deems life precious and worth protecting, he would never kill without having a good damn reason to do so. (Like when he sees no other way to prevent a GREAT catastrophe or when the person just really DESERVES it. )

<< Shadow also possesses some sense of identity, as evidenced when after falsely being told that he isn't the Ultimate Lifeform due to a lab report. He states to Rouge that even if his memories were fake, he is still Shadow the Hedgehog. Similarly in Sonic Heroes, during the Egg Fleet level, he mentions that even without his memories, he is still the Ultimate Lifeform, Shadow the Hedgehog. These qualities make him rarely susceptible to being manipulated by other forces. >>

LMAO YEAH BECAUSE HE’S BEEN MANIPULATED FAR TOO MANY TIMES IN THE PAST HE’S DONE WITH THAT. 

:))))))) BACK TO THE PTSD SYMPTOMS

He is incredibly distrustful and keeps mostly to himself, because he can’t be sure that someone else would (a)buse him for their own gain :) betray him, or do something horrible to him (or someone he’s close to).

His identity as Shadow the Hedgehog, the ultimate life form, is literally ALL HE HAS LEFT IN THIS WORLD.

Everyone he knew and was close to DIED. He woke up 50 years in the future, all alone. He literally had NOTHING.

He didn’t even have a reason to live, which motivated him to carry out Geralds plan to destroy the planet.

<< Despite his apathetic nature, Shadow is not without compassion and has shown concern for others at certain times. >>

I think you mean…. 

Despite having trouble to convey his feelings of compassion and concern for others, he is shown to make attempts of support through his actions and carefully chosen words.

As already mentioned, Shadow never learned how to socialize, he’s awkward about it, and on top of it all he has trouble trusting and opening up to people. Stop saying he doesn't care, he just doesn’t know how to show that. 

Also Shadow is a very logically thinking person, so he might look at things a different way than others and see things very dry and objectively. He doesn’t mean to be rude or evil, whatever he does is always with the other people’s possible concerns and feelings in mind. (He just has trouble to read their emotions and imagining what they might think/how they feel about a situation).

<< Shadow brushes off most kindness or sympathy that is sent his way; in Sonic Heroes, when Rouge showed concern for Shadow when he saw a broken android, Shadow curtly brushed her concern away. >>

GOD. That’s because he doesn’t know how he feels about the situation himself yet. He also feels like he doesn’t deserve concern or worry from other people; and he very strongly dislikes making others feel bad. Making other people worry about him makes him a bother, and he doesn’t want to be an inconvenience. He puts on this mask of strong ultimate soldier that has everything under control, so he doesn’t hinder anyone from reaching their own full potential.

I mean.. I mentioned this like 3 times now but this is SO important!!!!

He appreciates support, but often times he feels like it’s shallow or the person might have secret intentions; so he only ever truly accepts it when he feels like it was genuine and deserved.

<< Despite the fact that Shadow often fights for the greater good, he is considered an anti-hero by the most part due to his morality. He does whatever is necessary to get what he wants or feels is right, though this enthusiasm causes him to take risks and jump into situations without fully thinking it through. >>

B-But that is the definition of anti-hero….

SOMEONE WHO DOES WHAT THEY WANT/HAVE TO DO TO ACHIEVE WHATEVER THEY THINK IS RIGHT ???

He’s just chaotic neutral you fungus………

<< Shadow's fighting style focuses on brutal, unrestrained and powerful hand-to-hand combat. In line with his nature and potent abilities, Shadow has adopted a fighting style where he fights his opponents using powerful blows, such as karate chops, swift punches and roundhouse kicks, to which many of his attacks have a significant amount of force behind them. With the speeds Shadow can move at, he can disable the opponent through the force of his blows alone, while leaving them at the mercy at his incoming attacks. >>

HERE’S THE TEA:

He attacks his opponents with such heavy blows hoping to take them down with minimal effort, but without actively harming them too much. 

His attacks are chosen very carefully. In 06 his chaos spears even just paralyzed his opponents asjfhsakj like. he can do that.

AS ALREADY MENTIONED: shadow is out to immobilize; not to kill.

putting opponents out of commission is the goal, not to end their life in vain…. it’s RIGHT THERE

<< With the speeds Shadow can move at, he can disable the opponent through the force of his blows alone, while leaving them at the mercy at his incoming attacks. >>

HE DISABLES EM WITH ONE BLOW SO HE CAN JUST GO ON WITH HIS MISSION ASJKHFASKJ

this whole “leaving them at mercy” bullshit is unnecessary and incorrect.

<< While not having any physical weakness, Shadow was initially a somewhat easy target for manipulation during the time he had amnesia due to his confusion about who he was. >>

THIS IS IT! MY ENTIRE BEEF WITH HOW THE FANDOM TREATS SHTH AS A GAME!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!! HOOOOOOOOLLLLYYYY SSSSHHIIIIIITTTTTT!!!!!!!!!! LET ME TELL YOU

okay so the whole POINT of the game is to show the player ALTERNATIVE TIMELINES in which shadow is manipulated in slightly different ways which lead to slight changes in his personality and like. with all the selective information he received he can be manipulated into becoming different kinds of people. 

i don't see how people dismiss the entire game as not canon?????, IMO those are all very valid and canon alternative timelines??? like… canon AUs???????

you can't just throw the entire game under the rug??? 

and saying things like “shadow is an android now i guess bc of that one shth ending” im..,

he was MANIPULATED into BELIEVING so. Eggman lied to him so he would obey him. (or just to make him unstable enough to be able to restrain him)

(proof ^^^^^ dialogue of eggman speaking to shadow during the final boss, saying that he lied and that shadow is the real shadow)

OH BOY ........ THE TRUE ENDING!!!!!!!! HOOOLY SHIIIIT

people have so much beef with shadow “leacing the past behind him” and like the “sayonara shadow the hedgehog” in the last cutscene…….. im…………………….

“leaving the past behind” doesn’t mean just forgetting about everything and pretending it never happened, it means ACKNOWLEDGING that it happened, ACCEPTING IT…. learning from it and then…. MOVING FORWARD.

it means that you learned from your past and are now at peace with it, not stressing over it anymore… finally able to focus on the present moment and your feelings in the NOW; maybe even think about the future a little more.

just. yeah. it means he made peace with his past and wont let it define him (in the sense that its all he thinks about and that his haunting memories control him) and he is more confident in himself and perhaps regained some self-worth…

and that “sayonara shadow the hedgehog” is 

 a call to say that his old “self” is now gone, and that it's time for the new “self” to rise

 just look at the room he’s in and the picture he's looking at…… those were maria's last words at him…… let him mourn one last time, let him make peace with her death. he’s been stressing over it long enough.

<< Professor Gerald's granddaughter, Maria Robotnik, is by far the one person that made Shadow the happiest. She was like a sister to him, and they shared the same dream; to visit Earth. >>

Can yall stop shipping them romantically? thanks.

I headcanon that Shadow adopts the Robotnik last name for a VERY GOOD reason.

okay im done w the wiki bye fuckface

I’m not done yet tho.

I want to talk about a thing I see in lots of fanart too... 

Shadow smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol.

Shadow is a highly sensitive creature and alcohol has an unpleasant sting to it when you drink it and he KNOWS it’s bad for people’s health. He would never indulge wild parties or participate in “jolly drinking” where people drink for the purpose of getting drunk and having “fun”.

He very much appreciates having one drink with rouge at the bar (for the taste, purely) or a beer at a meal with someone else. 

He doesn’t actively seek it, but he also is not totally repulsed by it.

What disgusts him is the abuse of alcohol and he doesn’t like associating with that behavior and stays away from people who do that. 

why? easy. let’s just take a look at cigarettes.

each package has a warning and disgusting picture of the aftermath of smoking on it, and everyone is very well informed about how bad it is for their own health, and more so for the health of the people around them. 

He does not accept people who put whatever benefit they think they receive from this, if they put it before the well being of others and willingly make themselves sick and rot.

Same goes for alcohol. Everyone is very well aware that its toxic to our bodies, but people get drunk and risky anyways. This way of fleeing their troubles is illogical and ungrateful. 

Ungrateful to the gift of life, to the healthy bodies they posses.  It has a lot to do with the unfairness he feels when he thinks about how Maria had a life expectancy of 9 or 10 years for something that wasn’t even her fault. And there are other, perfectly fine humans out there, that willingly destroy their bodies and willingly accept that they are harming the ones around them with their behavior too.

[ DISCLAIMER: This is not meant to call anyone who reads this that drinks or smokes out as a bad person; you can do what you want I’m not trying/going to try convincing you to stop or make you feel guilty. This is the standpoint of someone who has experienced health related loss, so it indeed is extreme. I am not trying to start a debate. ]

another beef i have is the weird idea that shadow is a lusty dominant rapist

[ warning that sexual themes might be discussed, but not explicit ]

shadow is MOST PROBABLY asexual; and even if he was interested in intercourse he would be polite about it, seek consent and so on and so on

just are many people forgetting that despite him being very mature, he had not had much life experience yet. 

not to be reaching but he kinda fits the “born sexy yesterday-trope”; where he is mature, there’s a gray area on his age, and he is clueless about how life works and basically a man-child “that needs teaching”

just that for some weird reason i see a lot of people draw shadow as very flirtatious, and in fanfictions he gets very violent towards romantic partners and ofc the infamous sonadow rape porn (tho ive encountered stuff relating to the born sexy yesterday shit too)

[ im not here to discuss how WRONG the things above are in its own, im just here to talk abt characterization today. ]

i just want generally everything to stop........... its bad........ don’t put that shit up in public and then even untagged........

[ warning end ]

..........

before anyone comes at me like “uuummmm but things you said are bad are actually portrayed in canon like that”

sorry but

hate to say it but i know their character better than sega themselves.

I’m tired and my wrists hurt i need to stop typing now but you did not hear the last of me.

[solange-lol]

Why were people so mad at Rachel, I mean if you had the chance to kiss Percy Jackson wouldn't you take it???

i mean personally i wouldnt bc haha gay but yeah im sure 99% of chb (and a few of my friends) want to kiss percygive rachel the credit for actually having the confidence to make a move(also were percabeth dating then/did rachel know about them at that point bc i honestly cant remember) (whoops fake fan)