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#I DIDNT HAVE A GOOD IDEA FOR WHAT TO DO BUT I HOPE THIS IS GOOF
introspectivememories · 6 months
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it's always distinguished lesbian momo with disaster gay todoroki. we need to flip the script. disaster lesbian momo with distinguished gay todoroki. tddk are practically living together in shouto's japanese style dorm meanwhile momo flies in every morning, hair a mess, slamming that shoji door open, talkin bout "todoroki-kun! kyouka touched my knee this morning! do you think she likes me????"
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heaveniowa · 1 year
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so good right now / flu game - fall out boy
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deoidesign · 22 days
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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sneez · 1 year
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more of my oc tervis (any pronouns), the creepiest most miserable little weirdo in town. which is saying something [id under cut]
/ ID: four digital drawings.
The first image is a series of drawings of Tervis on a paper-textured background. A heading at the top reads 'Tervis (Humble)'. One is a coloured headshot of Tervis looking to the left; they have a gaunt face, short receding hair, a scar bisecting their lip and right eyebrow, greyish skin, and are wearing a red shawl around their neck. An arrow pointing at their right eye reads 'one blue eye (mostly blind)'; another arrow pointing at their left eye reads 'one brown eye'. They have a serious, hostile expression. The second drawing is an uncoloured full-body sketch of Tervis. Next to this is the same drawing but coloured and with more polished lineart. Tervis is a thin, hunched figure wearing a long, dark brown robe, a greyish bag on their back, and a red shawl around their head and neck. They are barefoot, and are leaning on a walking staff with both hands. An arrow pointing to the walking staff reads 'needed for walking, useful for hitting'. Tied to the belt around their waist are several long scrolls of paper with writing on them. An arrow pointing to the scrolls reads ''blessings' they paste on infected houses'. Tervis is looking warily out at the viewer from beneath their eyebrows. An arrow pointing to their head reads 'scar from getting hit in the face with a brick (also knocked out a tooth)'. Alongside these drawings are a series of bullet points giving information about Tervis. These read:
   indeterminate age, indeterminate gender
   religious fanatic (unclear which religion)
   lives alone somewhere in the steppe
   dislikes everyone but is nicer to children than anyone else
   has every disease
The second image is a fake screenshot from the video game Pathologic. Tervis is looking out at the viewer; the background shows scenery from the steppe. The text on screen reads:
CHANGELING: I still don’t see what you could have done that would make you personally responsible for this plague. TERVIS: Responsible… no, not merely responsible! This is my plague, cast upon my head alone. I am the originator; my sin is at the root of all. I have ventured into the town. I have seen the canker there. No matter how many houses I bless, my sickness sinks deeper. The rotted limb is the death of the body… Surely you understand me. You are a healer, are you not? CHANGELING: What is it that you are asking me to do? TERVIS: Let me be the lamb, worker of miracles! My blood shall wet the earth, and bright flowers shall grow… My putrefaction will provide the soil within which new life will burgeon, pure and free of sin and decay. Let it be done. I am ready. My failing flesh is but little sacrifice; in death my weakness will be my strength. Soon these torments will be at an end.
Below are two dialogue options:
You’re insane!
What makes you so sure your death would solve anything?
The third image is a fake screenshot from the video game Pathologic 2. Tervis is looking out at the viewer, and has been painted in semi-realistic style. The text on screen reads:
Tervis: Why do you force me to live? Damn you! Your cure is poison to me. Now I shall never be blessed. You should have left me to bleed.
Below are three dialogue options:
Don’t be absurd. I wasn’t going to watch you die.
What makes you think you deserve suffering?
I wish I had.
At the bottom of the image is a line of dialogue which Tervis has just spoken:
The air is foul. There is rot in this place. The stench of corruption shall be – what was it? What was it? The stench of corruption shall be… swept aside…
The fourth image is a coloured scene depicting Tervis and Clara. They are central in the composition; around them is the steppe, which has been rendered in a loose, painterly style. Tervis is kneeling, their walking staff cast aside, and are reaching out their hands to Clara in a desperate, pleading gesture. They are crying, their face contorted in an expression of agonised ecstasy. Clara stands beside them, one hand reaching out, the other held above Tervis’s head as though about to touch their brow. She has a solemn, pained expression. Behind her head, a break in the dark clouds gives the impression that she is haloed by sunlight; rays of the same light fall onto Tervis, illuminating their face and red robe. End ID. /
#artwork#pathologic#tervis!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D#sorry i know ive already posted that fake p2 screenshot i just wanted to keep all my tervis images in one place. please forgive me#i am having. So Much Fun. i would explode and die for tervis shes the worst i adore her#making fake screenshots is so enjoyable i love trying to match the fonts and copying all the little ui details it's so fun highly recommend#i have a lot of tervis lore which i am still developing but hopefully these drawings give you some idea of his character#hes just a mess really. hes got every imaginable problem#that last drawing is her getting sacrificed in the humble ending. she is SO happy about it#also if you didnt see my last post tervis was originally a warhammer 40k oc (which he still is ive just made a bonus pathologic tervis now)#but ive tried to keep a lot of 40k stuff in her design like the blessing scrolls and the uh. Posture#that's also my reasoning for why nobody knows what his religion is. the watsonian explanation is they are just spouting incomprehensible#disjointed passages from some obscure scripture which nobody can identify (and who would want to try really. tervis is not good company)#but the doylist explanation is that it's literally just the cult mechanicus. just ignore all the references to the weakness of the flesh and#the glory of the machine it will all be fine nothing weird here at all#anyway :-) i could talk about tervis forever but i will stop now#i hope you are all well my dear friends! i am on holiday now wahoo#i am also aware that i have several messages to answer which i will do very soon i am so sorry for being so slow as usual#i love you all i am giving you individual kisses on your individual heads. mwah
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spoopdeedoop · 1 year
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So I have been seeing and watching your work and was wondering if you could give basic body tips and maybe facial help (I LOVE HOW U DO FACES AND CHEEKS AND EYES AND- EVERYTHING)?
SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER I WAS NERVOUS BUT HERE!!! SORRY MY WRITING IS KINDA ALL OVER THE PLACE I DID THIS VERY QUICKLY
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aropride · 9 months
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nervous laughter
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arthur-r · 21 days
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(stupid vent in the tags i’m maybe struggling a lot. not feeling particularly real or handling my life and relationships maturely at all)
#i love i LOVE how i can write out three fucking pages of how well and normal my life is going and then just fall apart#is this directly correlated to whether i take my anxiety medication? certainly but the side effects are SHIT and its not mandatory anymore#(realizing the amount of my shit relationship that i spent fucking drugged up by myself is SHIT!! i wasn’t a real human being i was so#fucking out of it all the time and he DIDNT FUCKING CARE and i’m upset. that being said i’m anxious as shit now without my meds)#anyway i’m meeting up with two people tomorrow and they’re both the most fucked up sorts of relationships where they’ve been almost my#entire life at certain points of time but are also people who have made me FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE but with no ill will just fucked situation#problem is one is just an asshole but the other is an incredible person with delusions attached. i think. i’m struggling#i was so fucking healthy two days ago and i thought its a good idea to say hi when i’m in town. but no actually i’m fucked in the head#i feel like he’s either going to kill me or fall in love with me. he’s ten years older than me. and has done NOTHING WRONG IM JUST INSANE#should i not show up?? this is a normal fucking person this is a normal person and i want to say hi. already sent him a long fucking email#so we’re a little late to lose this relationship. and it’s FUCKING NORMAL. normal fucking person. mentor figure positive fucking role model#what the fuck is wrong with me!!!! i’m so fucking normal i just get insane. i’m being like my nemesis actually. ex-bandmate who fucked me u#and didn’t fucking care about anyone and saw me as a character i’m doing her fucking thing. im talking about a normal man who cares about m#a normal amount. ​and interacts with me in a NORMAL FUCKING WAY. who SAVED MY FUCKING LIFE. what is WRONG WITH ME#aside from that…. i’m just feeling sick and awful. my little sister is really struggling and so am i. and i talk so much and never listen#and i could have fucking sworn that i was doing well. fucking LAST NIGHT i wrote all about how fucking stable i am. how i’m going to be oka#AND I AM. i just feel like shit. and i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i’m going on testosterone TOMORROW if all goes well. why can’t i#just fucking focus on that?!!?!?!?? and i’m dysphoric as shit it’s half of what’s wrong with me right now. maybe t will just fucking fix me#but what the fuck. what the fuck. i dont know. all of a sudden i’m in a bad place. i just want to be okay.#i hope everyone is well and i’m sorry for venting. i would almost not post this but i don’t feel real#i don’t know. sending love…. let me know if you need anything please. be well 💛#friends only#vent cw#like if read#delete later#ask to tag
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bisexualnamjoonie · 8 months
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twitter and tiktok lgbts seriously need to learn to shut their fucking mouth and get educated on shit before they open it I am dead serious queer theory is not a fucking toy you can pull out as you please everytime something doesn't agree with you personally godddddd
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izzyizumi · 1 year
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Digimon Ghost Game ~ Hiro & Gammamon + {Tanabata}! (Japanese cultural holiday taking place on July 7th!)
#digimon ghost game#digimon: ghost game#hiro amanokawa#amanokawa hiro#hiro and gammamon#izzyizumi posts#(OK so Fun Story Time)#(Way back in 2k13 during Tanabata of that year I was very actively involved in a big 'pan-fandom' wide r.p. {role-play} game)#(This wasn't on Tumblr but it was elsewhere and Anyway so I wasn't playing from DigiAdvs at time though I did have my Koushiro he was just)#(Getting Started with my Koushiro Voice Testing & at time I was testing out other charas too & one is like Japan EmbodiedTM)#(Im Not Saying Who They Were {I had a few Similar} but anyway 2k13 was the year immediately after Grandpa on my not-Jew end passed)#(and I was close to Grandpa on that end & Grandparents in general too & Grandpas passing at time hit me *super* hard too)#(At same time. Multiple people were dropping from the rp game {it was still pretty active but} it had been slowing a bit as a result)#(So I got the idea to have my chara hold a Tanabata event post and it actually got like 1200+ comments total)#(of course half of those were replies during threads but anyway it was a surprisingly big success for me to have made that event work)#(At the time my charas 'wish' had simply been 'I hope for the remainder of the following year to be Good')#(What my Chara meant was 'I do not Need a Wish but if I have one I hope everyone elses Wishes can come true for them')#(and also 'if I must make a Wish I would Wish to not {be the only one left here} by the end of That Time')#(and my rp partner who threaded with me had their chara be like 'I'll wish for your wish to come true' & wrote it in charas 5 languages)#(They didnt Know I also meant re the rp games stability but like anyhow that event post was one of my most fun rp experiences ever)#(Fam deaths hit me super hard & I was in a very dark place at time but being able to experience that event really helped me that year)#(I probably wouldn't have kept this blog running on queue for as long if it hadn't been for things like That really helping in between)#(in general I'm really grateful cultural holidays like Tanabata still exist for Japanese people especially as I am {myself} a Jew)#(& we have our own cultural holidays & they may clash at times with Concepts but at the same time I *do* believe we can have solidarity)#(anyway im super Super Happy that if not Koushiro. *Hiro* could get a Tanabata piece because I feel it fits Hiro+Gammamon a TON too)#(Hiro would definitely be the type to be like 'I wish for the remainder of the year to be Good {for Everyone}' & Koushiro Would Too)#(but it does kind of Hit in a Certain way for Hiro+Gammamons storyline in itself Too & I'm just super grateful Hiro could get July theme)#(because if it really couldnt be Koushiro. & I wanted Koushiro for either Tanabata or Aug 1st in itself if not rainy season {June})#(Hiro was Next Best Choice & anyway This is also what I mean when I say I think cultural themes with this series should be Acknowledged)#(When They Happen in Various Official Arts or even eps INVOLVING the Chosen themselves because these are *cultural specific holidays*)
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timeisacephalopod · 4 months
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Sometimes I'll be watching an American TV show and there's this idea that if you're treated like dog shit you'll want to win or succeed to "prove them wrong." Like on Glee Finn describes putting up with Sue's abuse as hurtful but mostly it makes him want to win, and idk if this is a uniquely American thing or not but it baffles me.
When I work hard on stuff and people act like it's shit, or don't acknowledge my effort, or some other thing I don't get motivated. I have the opposite reaction especially if I've worked hard on something and that effort ultimately ends up being for nothing- like why would I try HARDER at something that didn't work? That's a waste of time lol I stop putting effort in at all and put the effort I was spending on something that didn't work out into something that might. Do people seriously believe that being treated like shit or otherwise having your hard work dismissed is motivational?? Because that sounds extremely counterintuitive to how I feel like people work unless I'm built different and I don't think I am in this case.
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rorsry · 10 months
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watched uhh dorothy returns ro wizard of oz (2013) and i'd give it a 6.5/10 in general but entertainment wise i'd give it an 8.5 (tbf i was watching it with my brother idk how i'd rate it if i was alone) theres a part where they need a boat and dorothy snaps a piece of wood off a tree who yells in pain and then every tree there starts throwing rocks and acorns at her but then it cuts to a tree hunched over and hes like "take me... take me." and i csnt properly explain why it's so unbelievably funny. the line delivery makes him sound so accepting like he's really willing to die to help dorothy get a boat and i can't stop thinking about it
#also watched dino king. uh. 29 minutes in my brother and i thought it was gonna end soon so we paused and saw we still had an hour left#and we both visibly went HUH??? and i was like are we gonna power through this movie or watch khumba......and he chose to power through#for a dinosaur movie it's not bad i actually really like what they tried going for? ie using footage of real landscape and cgi-ing dinos#in it to make it seem like it's Real Life. obviously the cgi is so very noticable but they did pretty good👍🏼#when speckles (main character) fell into water instead of cgi-ing the water the dropped something irl but put his model over ir#which i find neat i didnt think they'd do that. kinda sad at the lack of blood when the dinos would kill each other#also speckles' family dies which i expected and when the timeskip happens and he finds a girl and then she dies i expected however i did no#expect them to kill two out of three kids like i'm glad junior survived but god damn after the first one died i was hoping the last two#would survive at the very least. also fuck one eyed i thought he was just survivng at first but no he literally started beef#with a one year old dinosaur baby and decided Yeah Im Gonna Ruin Your Life Forever Buddy#my brother and i when speckles finally kills one eyed: yoooo YOOOOOO#movie would have heen better with like 98% more blood but when they did sue blood they used both cgi and fake irl#which i'll admit was kinda cool#fuck you one eye i fucking hate you#ok anywaus we tried watching khumba but didnt bc it was getting late so we watched the first 20mins and then skipped to the end#i think it wouldve been a nice movie? i have no idea but i mean i didnt hate what i saw#if you guys rver wanna watch a movie just got to free with ads on youtube ive been obsessing over those for months now#btw dino movies are very boring to me i forgot to add that. so yeah dino king IS boring to me but i had fun
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piplupod · 11 months
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i hate having a bad memory because there was some guy in public walking in front of my sibling and me, and he had a bunch of nordic tattoos and a vest on that had a bunch of patches and elder futhark runes all along the bottom. and i could not for the life of me clearly remember what symbols were the nazi (folkish odinist) ones so i was just fucking shaking terrified until i could pull my sibling through an opening in the crowd to get away from the guy
anyways. i got home and looked it up and yeah that was a nazi lmfao. i fucking hate this bc I don't think I'm able to do anything about that since i am malnourished and tiny compared to most other people, and this guy was lowkey huge (tall and beefy). i wish i could do literally Anything about this kind of thing, i hate that these people feel safe to walk around with literal hate symbols proudly on display
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outivv · 2 years
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hii it’s my first time doing a request so idk if i’m doing this right… so i recently had to put down my dog of 14years and it was really hard because i grew up with her and i was wondering if you could write a little something with Noelle (platonic). Like how she would comfort a reader that just lost their pet. just some comfort fluff.
Feel free to ignore this if you’re not comfortable with writing this :)
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Synopsis: comfort fluff with noelle!!!
Warnings: mentions of putting down a pet, and not proofread
Game/ fandom: genshin impact
Character: noelle (platonic)
Pronouns for reader: gender neutral/ not mentioned
A/n: hello!!! I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your dog, I bet she was a wonderful pet to grow up with. I hope this makes you feel even a little better, cause I understand the loss of a pet can be extremely hard. I hope you enjoy, and I hope you have a great rest of your day :)
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“Good morning [name]!” Noelle said as you walked into the knights headquarters, about to start a tiring day at work. You only smiled, but something was… off. Noelle has been your closest friend in the knights, and while she’s not always the best with social cues, she knows what that smile meant, and she knew it was sad. “Oh dear… what’s wrong?” Noelle asked sympathetically. Her kindness warmed your heart, as she wrapped an arm around you guiding you to your office where you two could talk in private.
After telling her everything, how much you loved your pet, how much it hurt to put them down, noelle had this sad look on her face, as if she may cry. Noelle is a extremely sympathetic, and emotional person, but it was comforting seeing someone who cared so much about others, and their feelings. Noelle left your office for a minute, saying she had to go grab something.
You thought this would be a good time to start work, since you had no idea how long she would take… that was a bad idea by the way. Noelle came back, with two plates full of pancakes, specially made by her. She set the massive plate down in front of you saying, “making, and eating food always helps me feel better.” Her sympathetic smile made you feel warm and fluffy. You ate pancakes as you told stories about your pet, describing them in vivid detail, as noelle listened intently. She’d help anyone in need, especially her best friend.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years
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#Jesus. just finished my interview. no idea how it went#i think it was much too rambling on my part and they asked almost exclusively sciency questions#ugh hopefully i didn't look like a completle moron. the guy was sorta inscrutable so no idea what he thought#and he was like hmm whats ur competition here? and i dont give a fuck abt competition and also it doesnt really matter#fuck. i should have said. it would b fine if they were doing the exact same project bc we would b evolving different strains and it would b#interesting if they evolved even the exact same traits. fuck#i think objectively i probably looked like someone who halfway knows what theyre doing without the specific knowledge#which is exactly true. like mother fuckers ive got a full time job to be overworked in. i dont have time to memorize details of every#pathway change in every desert cyano#uuuuugh its just annoying bc my brain doesnt work well in the moment. i need time to process and knit together an answer#so i wouldnt b surprised if i was ranked low. oh god i was told the interview was prob a formality unless it goes terribly#itll b real embarrassing if i dont get passed this stage now#whatever it was a bit chaotic on their end too bc one guy didnt show up until halfway thru so i kinda had to go back and say things twice#uuuuuuuuuuggh. well that kinda sucked. at least its done. out of my hands now.#i was getting too excited abt it anyway. this will reaffirm my: obviously im not gonna get it vibes#i mean thats what i get for trying to join a very competitive program. like i am not a competitive person#rip to my lab mate who im gonna whine at all day abt this. i have to meet him in less than an hour#welp. there r other schools. god i hope at least one of them accepts me#ugh i just think its kinda annoying they they want u to be perfectly qualified for things lol. like i would need someone to step thru the#lab process with me literally once or twice and then id be good to go#like maybe a couple hours of someones time to remind me. thats it. humans r adaptable#i can obviously carry out a project to its conclusion and i have a lot of passion. not that they asked. but yeah#oh well. i should have breakfast before i freeze in the desert all day#unrelated
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nomaishuttle · 10 months
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my new facial cleanser got here :]] 1. smells sooo nice its coconut vanilla (2 of my favorite scents) 2. my skin feels nice :]]
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