#I always loose my reaction image...

[tapakah0]

a

WHEEEEEEZE YES. YES. I NEED IT. IT'S NOW MY WARNING SIGN BEFORE I START GHOST THING

[atrwriting]

future problems — coriolanus snow x fem!wife!reader

hi everyone :) jumping on the bandwagon

this man is so fine i couldn’t help myself. i hope everyone had an amazing holiday if they celebrate — i celebrate christmas, so here is my almost 10k word christmas gift to all of you xoxo love u all v much thank you for reading !!

as always, warnings: corio-lame-o is a fucking warning holy fuck, smuuuuut, arranged marriage (i think this counts?), coriolanus is a distrustful evil fuck (but he’s super hot), fem!reader, reader is married to this dickhead (i say as if i wouldn’t want to be lmao), angst, sexism and misogyny is def in here, p in v penetration, m receiving oral, choking, dom!corio, asshole!corio, sub!reader, subspace kinda

informal warnings: bro what the fuck was i on this is literally 10.2k words and i refuse to edit because im super lazy anyway we die like men you've been warned

anyways… here is future problems:

he never wanted to get married.

he saw it as a potential problem, one that would most definitely lead to loose ends — and he hated loose ends.

despised them.

however, his innate need to maintain an image was far more important to him. he weighed the costs and benefits in his head like an algorithm — check, check, check. coriolanus’ mind left no stone unturned, especially when future problems were to be squashed before they could ever be wiped from memory. in the end… he decided he would marry.

and it would be you.

he never allowed himself to be naive — so he would never allow himself to marry someone he already loved. lucy gray? a child’s want for something they can’t have, and something they wouldn’t realize until later that it was a walking regret. no — he could never marry someone that would harm him. absolutely not. out of the question. therefore, it had to be you.

it had to be you because what harm would you cause him? you were shy, quiet, of satisfactory social standing, and uncontroversial. everything a patriarch of the snow family would want. deserved. be entitled to.

he needed someone that wouldn’t be a problem — a loose end in the future. he had conquered so much — he refused to let anything else, especially as irrelevant as a significant other, stand in his way.

however… it did not aid him in his stone-cold lack of a love affair conquest that you were absolutely breathtaking.

at first, it was just an ego boost. he simply couldn’t stop his thoughts from voicing, of course she’s perfect. the snow legacy can only have perfect.

but then… oh, then…

then he saw your smile.

oh, your smile.

your fucking smile.

the first time he caught himself enjoying it — he scolded himself. he refused to see you for a week. a punishment of sorts. more so for him than for you. after, he refused to let his eyes wander on the pretty features of your face for him to witness a reaction to something someone had said or done. he didn’t want to be reminded of what it was like to experience joy or peace because someone else was experiencing it — that was what almost costed him everything he had built.

no one would ever tear that down. not again, not ever.

no one.

when the day of your marriage came, it was business as usual. he refused to meet eye contact, and did not partake in more conversations with you than he had to. he could tell you felt uncomfortable — but he forced himself not to care. he drove it down, down, down like a miner drilling for more coal — hoping, one day, it would be worth it.

and it was… until he was sick.

it was a minor ailment — nothing major, but he was on bedrest for about a week or two. he had employed enough adequate members to his staff to feel that things would at least be taken care of until then. he also found comfort in the fact that two weeks was not long enough for something irreversible to occur. if a problem had taken placed, he would be able to rectify it once he was well and able and… set aside the responsible party.

however, he did not expect one problem.

and that would be you.

he knew you were asking to see him. he knew, he knew, he knew, but he refused to let you in. you were not disrespectful — you had only asked once a day, which happened to be every day in the afternoon. he had picked you specifically because you were too quiet to be annoying. however, his own perfect, pristine, and proper plan had stabbed him in the back. he had never considered that the perfect, pristine, and proper wife would be this dutiful to him, checking in once a day on his condition and to speak with him. despite his illness, he laughed at himself — leave it to him to not expect the expected: the hand-selected dutiful wife would, in fact, be dutiful.

he had to put an end to it. he couldn’t keep saying no for another week. how was he expected to get better if you kept bothering him?

so he let you in. this once. just this once. he reasoned that if he let you in this once, you would be less persistent. just this once — and another problem would cease to plague his mind.

just this once, he chanted in his head. just this once.

he sat up straighter, and attempted to shape his hair so it wasn’t terribly unkept. he reasoned that if you saw him appearing to be healthy, you wouldn’t feel the need to come back. he thought —

but he couldn’t finish the thought.

because you walked in.

smelling like fucking lilacs.

lilacs, of all things. lilacs! not roses, not anything else — lilacs. he did not hate lilacs, but he despised the actual flower. only beautiful for so long before it died and the stench was intolerable. an inconvenience. a nuisance. a guaranteed future problem.

however, when you gifted him with a small smile — you realized why small shows of beauty were so valuable in this world. no one else saw your smile — except for those closest to you. people he hand selected to be around you to prevent future problems. he realized then — he had more control and ownership over your smile than either of you thought.

he was so stunned by your smile he didn’t even notice the tray of tea and cakes in your hand. you took a few steps towards him and he shifted in place.

“i brought your favorites,” you spoke softly. “i know you should rest — i just wanted to ask if there was anything i could do to make your recovery easier.”

“no, thank you,” he replied, voice raspy. “i should be well in a few days.”

you nodded and offered an uneasy smile. his eyes flickered over to how once you had set down the tray on his beside, you slowly wiped the palm of your hands down the front of your dress. your eyes were cast absentmindedly in front of you, on the wall — and he could tell something was plaguing your thoughts.

he then also realized there was a book on the tray, much to his dismay.

“someone had mentioned that this was your favorite author. this was published a few days ago,” you began. “i understand that you have been experiencing headaches, and may find it difficult to read… so i wanted to offer to read aloud for you, in case you found these walls dull.”

you smiled — it was an attempt at a joke. he smiled back, but only to be polite. “today i find myself wanting to sleep. i appreciate your offer.”

you smoothed your hands over your dress once more before nodding and forcing a smile. “i’ll leave you to it, then.”

you did not bid him farewell — and he found himself wondering if he was annoyed or grateful. you simply exited the room, and let the door shut softly behind you.

he scrunched his eyes at the door, swallowing hard.

however, he didn’t understand why.

he had wanted this. the perfect wife — knowing when to take a hint and frankly, fuck off. you had done that, perfectly well — so why was he pissed?

he then found himself glaring angrily at his favorite tea cakes. the swap of sugar for honey, another one of his favorites. his favorite author, a book he was excited to read when he was better. he knew that you hadn’t asked about him — he employed people with the requirement to let him know when you were asking questions. he knew your every outward thought and concern, and sometimes even the ones that weren’t shared aloud because they were so evident on your face.

and then he realized: you noticed things like he noticed things.

however, he knew why he went out of his way to notice things, but why did you?

his jaw clenched as he glared angrily at the wall in front of him. he picked up a tea cake and chewed it aggressively, swallowing it half-intact. he coughed at the barely there food, anger rising further to his flushed cheeks.

he needed to understand how, and he most certainly needed to understand why.

he never went out of his way to get to know you, because he thought he already did. he thought he had you boiled down to one thing, and one thing only: passive. incapable of proving to be any sort of roadblock that was capable of getting in his way. now that he knew you shared something with him, what else was shared? was there something he had to look out for? was there something he missed? was he wrong about you?!

he had to know. he had to.

to do that… he called you back that evening. it was two hours before midnight, and he knew you were awake. despite having separate chambers, he knew your daily schedule. you would be reading at this moment, and he would ask you to read for him.

as if on cue, he heard a soft rapping on the wood of the door. he beckoned you in, and you entered the room. you were clad in a night dress with a matching robe over it, all pink silk. this time, he returned your smile.

"i apologize for the late hour," he spoke. "i hope you had not retired for the night."

you shook your head, your tendrils of perfect hair shaking slightly. "i was reading. i am glad you sent for me — can i get you anything?"

"i was hoping the offer to read for me was still on the table," he rasped. "i find myself unable to sleep."

you blinked once, staring at him. in an instant, a small smile was threatening to overtake your face into a large one. you cast your eyes down to a blushing manner, but his eyes narrowed slightly on your face. what would you get out of reading for him? what we he not seeing? what did he miss?

"of course," you responded. "i have not had a chance to read anything by this author. i am glad i have the chance now."

why. why. why.

he did not show his discontent. he simply rested back against the pillows as you reached for the book on his bedside table. you sat down on a chair on his side, and you crossed your legs. he eyed the small portion of the exposed, soft skin of your legs and wondered if your new ploy would be to try and seduce him. however, you quickly covered your skin with the extra material over your robe and placed the book in your lap. once opened, you read for him.

he was not listening to what you were saying, but he was listening to how you said it. the tone, the enunciation, the pauses, and the speed. he wanted to find some clue as to why you had made it a point to be at his beck and call, and he wanted to see how long the act would last until it dropped.

the act would drop. it always did.

the hour would approach midnight before he found that he could not discern anything from how you were reading aloud. his plan did not yield the results intended, as you had not broken from fulfilling his task for two hours. two hours. you had not stopped out of boredom or exhaustion, nor to talk to him. you were poised, soft, and he hated to admit it... but sweet. he found your voice sweet, and he hated it.

and he fucking hated himself for it.

he needed this to end so he could plan further. out of necessity, he yawned. if you were to apt at picking up clues, then hopefully you would believe that he was finally tired. you had succeeded in his given task, and you were free to go.

but you had kept reading for him.

he grew angry.

when you had paused to breathe, he spoke up. "I think i am able to sleep now. thank you, sweetheart, for indulging me."

your eyeline raised with your eyebrows, almost out of surprise. you either were not expecting him to ask you to stop, or you did not want to stop. he wondered which, and if that would answer his ultimate question.

"my apologies, i should've inquired sooner," you replied. "he is a very talented writer... i found myself enjoying his perspective."

you grabbed a piece or scrap paper from his bedside table, and tucked it in between the pages where you left off.

"most people would fold the corner," he remarked, eyes drifting closed — a show.

you smiled. "i didn't want to ruin the integrity of your book. goodnight, coriolanus."

she left with another smile — and all he was left with was confusion, and rage.

the next morning, he found himself wanting to call you back in for a further rouse interview. he would have if he had a plan in place.

that was the second thing about you that annoyed him: you annoyed him to the point where he wanted to act without a plan in place. a loss of control —which he was highly against.

that would have to be righted immediately.

he spent the morning reading the pages that you had already read to brief himself as if he was listening last night. he reasoned with himself that the best course of action would be to ask you to read to him again to see if you had grown comfortable enough to let a few of your true colors slip.

they always slip.

the sudden task that was presented to him gave him a new bout of energy that he needed to inch closer to recovery. it gave him the push he needed to be closer to walking out of this room and continue to run panem, and he was lost grateful to you for giving it to him — almost. at the moment, you were a problem — and that needed to be corrected. immediately.

he found comfort in control, so he was very content with routines. he had grown accustomed to bracing himself for your check-in in the afternoon. however, it did not come until the approaching hours of the evening had almost descended upon the capitol. he waited, and waited, and waited — so long that he considered asking you to come for himself. the hour would approach dinnertime when you had finally asked about his well-being, and he sent for you.

how dare you ask so late in the day, as if you didn't care? he allowed you access to his life that he had denied you for so long, and you return his kindness with carelessness? this would not do. this most certainly would not do.

you had knocked on his door, and he had to stop himself from sounding to eager. he permitted you entry, and you entered with the same soft smile.

"good evening," you greeted.

"hello," he replied, voice still raspy from his sickness.

"I wanted to ask if you need anything," you announced.

he offered a small smile. "i enjoyed our time last night. perhaps you would read for me, again?"

your eyes fell to the floor in a blush. "of course. I was hoping to read more of the book eventually. i found it intriguing."

you sat down in the chair and pulled the book in your lap. as you were opening it, he spoke, "i thought when you had not checked-in in the early afternoon you found the book dull — afraid i would ask for you to read it for me again."

you shook your head as you smiled. "i like his writing very much — i was concerned as to whether i had prevented you from sleeping the night prior, and didn't want to disturb you further."

he swallowed. "why would you have disturbed me?"

your eyes glanced upwards from the pages to rest on his face. coriolanus stared back as slight concern washed over your features, making your lips part and your eyes widen. your tongue darted out from between your lips, and smoothed over the skin of your bottom lip. you responded, "before you fell ill, we hadn't spent much time together and i understand that is because of your position — but, to be frank, i wanted to respect your space.”

your answer perplexed coriolanus. he wanted to find out what type of person you were — and your answers were not yielding the expected results. there was no obvious form of manipulation in your words, which then worried him. were you smarter than he believed you to be? were you as cunning as him? more so?

so he went with what was natural: manipulation.

“i apologize my station has not granted us the freedom to get to know each other further,” he replied, holding your gaze. “it is a regret of mine.”

you smiled in an affirmative manner, like you didn’t believe him but accepted his answer anyway. this expression arose the same feelings he now detested your presence for: he acted without calculating his actions and the outcome they would produce.

“what troubles you?” he asked.

your lips parted and slightly quivered. you were not expecting him to ask.

“i-i was worried that i may not… please you,” you admitted. “that… you may regret our union.”

“you have been a kind and dutiful wife,” coriolanus spoke, eyes holding yours. “there is no regret.”

there was that affirmative smile again. he found himself hating it — wishing it would be replaced by the warm, soft one.

“i guess i was hoping that, when i was married, the marriage would be more than… a union.”

your candor shocked coriolanus. he would never have expected you to say something… so out of turn.

“please, forgive me,” you spoke, slightly laughing and waving your hand in the air. “the hour is almost late and i was hoping to read more. do you still wish me to?”

“please,” he answered and nodded.

you gave him a quick, thankful smile, and began reading.

this would be the second night coriolanus had not listened to a word you had said.

he had gotten his answer, and it was possibly as bad as the one he was actually afraid for.

you were good. pure, innocent, and your outlook on the world untainted. you were not striving to find a loose screw and let the empire fall. you wanted… to support the man who built and kept the empire together. it was worse than anything he could’ve ever imagined — you actually cared for him.

you cared for him, and now coriolanus snow was fucking terrified.

and yet... he had asked you to return to his chambers every night after that.

for research purposes, of course. only research purposes,

to read to him, but his goal was to learn more about you rather than the text.

you would sit there and read until he asked you to stop. when he did, you would close the book, smile at him, place it back on his nightstand, and bid him goodnight.

after, he would wrestle with the blankets and pillows in order to find out how to deal with this.

how had he not expected this?

his only fault was that he neglected to realize how far your shyness would go. you had grown comfortable with him — and you admitted that you wanted something more, something he always felt he could not give. you weren’t shy — you just weren’t open with people you weren’t comfortable with.

he should’ve known. he should’ve. fucking. known.

he didn’t know how to deal with this, if he was being honest with himself.

he told himself that he asked for you every evening to get to know you better, for his own sanity and safety; but then he began to realize he had found out everything he needed to know.

good and honest. how fucking unfortunate.

he saw a part of you, but now he needed to know more.

so what did he do? he sent you flowers. flowers. an arrangement of red roses and lilacs.

he hated himself for the lilacs.

he got somewhere with you when he had made the first move before — maybe this would yield more promising results.

however, it didn’t.

all he received in return was an extra tray of food that had arrived in the afternoon. his favorite tea cakes, and a handwritten thank-you note detailed in your appreciation for the beautiful flowers. you signed your name, and that was it.

she doesn’t make first moves, he thought. she responds to them.

he knew what he had to do.

he found himself feeling better that day — well enough to end his sick leave and return to his matters. dinner was approaching, and he sent for you to join him for a private dinner this evening.

he was washed, dressed, and coiffed within the hour.

he found you in the dining parlor waiting for him, inspecting his large bookcase. you were trying to reach a book a bit above where your height would allow, extending yourself onto your toes. coriolanus walked up behind you, towering over you, and retrieved the book for you.

you glanced up at him with wide eyes. “thank you, coriolanus.”

“what intrigued you?” he asked, grinning softly.

“first one i couldn’t reach. i was working my way up.” you smiled at him, and then the book. “please — you must be hungry. let us eat.”

you sat down at the table across from him. dinner manners were rather stiff and uncomfortable, but your upbringing that was similar to coriolanus’ prevented you from straying from them. you ate in silence for a few moments before you spoke.

“how do you like his new book?” you asked.

coriolanus cleared his throat. “i find it riveting. i wouldn’t have been able to read it for some time if it hadn’t been for you.”

you smiled at your plate, blushing. “his points are very interesting. i was never very interested in politics — so the insight of someone so heavily involved with them is very informative. do you find that your opinions align with his? or does he not share your perspective?”

he appreciated your willingness to engage with him about topics you weren’t very fond of. an underrated trait, not found very often — he had to admit.

“a bit of both,” he responded. “the one thing he does not discuss is how important it is to have a certain type of person or persons in your regime that allows the flow of success to continue.”

you nodded. “you have built a strong administration — i’m sure he would admire what you have to say.”

“what do you believe?” he asked. “about partnerships?”

you swallowed, contemplating your answer. “i think… a successful partnership is where everyone is complimented by another. for instance, someone is better at briefing documents rather than the presentation of them, and another is the opposite.”

“which one are you?” coriolanus inquired.

you paused once more, folding your lip under. he realized that was a sign you were uncomfortable — unaware of how to proceed. after a moment, you answered, “i feel the most confident under a strong leader. i prefer to be behind the scenes. minute details are easier to be taken care of that way. while you and i are different, i respect you for being the strong leader panem needed. i am sure the majority would agree with me.”

now was the time.

“it is easy to be strong when one’s wife makes sure they are well,” he replied, eyes resting on your face. “i hope you know i appreciate your willingness to accept change and make sure needs are met.”

you smiled at him once more, then turned back to your food.

damn, he thought. didnt bite.

“and for being the companion i… didn’t think i would come to enjoy the company of,” he added.

you glanced up at him then, astonishment written in your eyes as plain as the words on the paper you read for him every night. “may i ask you… a question?”

he nodded.

“did you believe you wouldn’t enjoy my company before, or after you had first met me?”

“i don’t understand.”

you swallowed, clearing your throat. “were you… wary of the idea of marriage, or wary of me?”

your gaze did not break from his. you were braver than he thought.

“marriage,” he answered honestly, hoping to witness your reaction.

there was the affirmative smile — the one he hated. “thank you for — for being honest.”

your eyes didn’t wait for a response. you turned back to your food, and left him dumbstruck.

“i hope i have not displeased you,” he stated.

“no, coriolanus,” you spoke. “if i am being honest… i was wary i would not be suitable for you. if i have not displeased you, then i am well.”

“but you stated you wanted more,” he countered, tone even.

“i hoped we would… spend time together,” you answered. “and we have.”

it was coriolanus’ turn to be at a loss for words. what would this admission relay? it only solidified what he was afraid of — you wanted a marriage filled of love, and he was not prepared for that. ever.

“the flowers were beautiful,” you spoke, interrupting his thoughts. “thank you for sending them.”

“your lilac perfume is a wonderful addition to the capitol,” he spoke, unsure where this had come from. “i wanted you to know that.”

you weren't supposed to say that you weren't supposed to tell the truth you weren't supposed

you smiled at him appreciatively, that accompanied a slight twinkle in your eye. you were quick to return to eating, but coriolanus couldn’t stop staring at your face. he realized then that was his new favorite smile.

there was a moment, a small moment, where he wondered whether it would be such a crime if he did allow himself to enjoy your company more than he had. in that moment, he couldn’t think of how it would go wrong. for that moment, you were a simple, low-maintenance, beautiful woman on the other side of the table with him that just liked spending time with him — and he enjoyed that you weren’t a problem. would it so bad if he entertained the idea?

he immediately cut himself off. of course it was a bad idea.

once dinner has finished, he had requested to walk you back your chambers. if time spent together was what kept you at bay, he could manage that. he most certainly could.

when the pair of you had approached the door, you stopped for a moment and paused reaching for the handle. you spoke, “would you… like to come in?”

“not tonight,” he rasped. he gave you a polite smile. “another time.”

he watched as you blinked your eyes a few times and your lips quivered. you didn’t meet his gaze, for it fell — in what appeared to be embarrassment.

oh.

you invited him in to… to…

that he had not expected.

before you had the chance to leave, he swooped down and grabbed your chin in his thumb and forefinger. he pressed his lips to yours ever so softly, holding it there. the moment your breath caught in your throat, there was a strange feeling inside his chest that made him feel like he’d like to quell your worries by catching you off guard another time. and another. and another. and another. he couldn’t have you feeling rejected, no — not when he didn’t want to reject you. he needed heirs, sure — but they could wait. he would contemplate how long later.

once he pulled back, you smiled. inside you were bursting, and you wanted to hurry behind a closed door so he could not see your reaction. he continued to hold your chin and gaze at your face. feeling brave, you looked him in the eye as you bid him goodnight and went into your room.

you left him standing outside your door, facing its wood paneling.

what was he to do?

he wanted to keep you as emotionally far away as possible to avoid anything like this occurring. he was prepared for people who had an ulterior motive… not a young woman who only wanted to be good to her husband.

the worst part was… not every part of him wanted him to keep you away.

would it be so bad, if he had actually courted you?

you were not anyone from his past, no. you were not irresponsible and impulsive, and you could be trusted to remain within a designated role and space. you were rarely outspoken — you never strayed from your cue cards, nor did you get smart in private. you never spoke out of turn, which coriolanus always knew — this was just the first time he was more turned on than he was just grateful.

he reasoned a reward was in order.

he found his knuckles wrapping on the door before he could stop himself.

the small movements inside your apartments stalled for a moment, pulled taut like a string in an instrument. he could picture you — standing still and silent, waiting for an explanation.

then he heard footsteps approaching the door before the door handle turned. when you opened the door, the first thing he saw was your eyes.

those big, beautiful eyes that looked at him with surprise — and the slightest bit of hope. coriolanus would most likely try to convince himself that he stayed completely still to exercise a form of control over you — but deep down, he would never be able to believe that completely.

however… when you reached out with your soft, delicate hand, and pulled at his own — it didn’t matter why he did it, because he won.

he shut the door behind him, keeping your gaze.

“i would be coy and ask if we could spend time together in a... different way than usual…” you began, sighing. “but up until this moment i was convinced we would never…”

coriolanus was in no mood to quell insecurities and anxieties. he understood that words could not compare to actions, and so he would do just that.

coriolanus stepped forward, and pressed his large hands against the sides of your face. for a split moment — you almost looked terrified. he usually relished in that look from others, but with you it only made him concerned — angry, even.

“i don’t know what it is about you.” his voice was shaky. it was the first moment in your entire marriage that coriolanus had shown even a shred of weakness. “you smile, you obey, you take my transgressions like they’re fucking sweets. why?! tell me!”

your big, round eyes were blown wide as your brow was knitted together. your lips were parted in an innocent manner, and it only fueled his anger. one of your hands came up to gently lay across the back of his. “coriolanus — have you ever considered that i just wanted to get to know you?”

his eyes searched yours like they were an important document and he couldn’t believe what bullshit he was reading. his lips pursed in a manner that suggested a sour taste, and you felt your joy slipping, slipping, and slipping.

“coriolanus — if you want to go, then go.” your voice was breaking. you knew he was a cool, hard man — but this? this? it was almost too much. “you don’t have to stay if you don’t —“

he couldn’t take your nonsense anymore. he shut you up with a kiss.

he smashed your lips together like it was the first thing he should’ve done when he walked back into the room. a squeal died in your throat at the contact, but coriolanus held you there and upright. both of your hands found the firmness of his chest for balance. when he pulled away — he barely did. he kept his lips an inch away from yours as little tuffs of air pushed past. he leaned his forehead against yours, almost bonding the two of you.

“my greatest displeasure will be making you regret this,” he rasped, eyes screwed shut.

your breathing began to hasten as you contemplated your next words. you began to stroke coriolanus’ hands with your thumbs, hoping to coax him. “you say that like it’s inevitable.”

“it is not far from,” he choked through anger and sadness.

you couldn’t help but stare back at him as he almost glared at you — but then you realized that wasn’t the case. he wasn’t glaring at you — he was glaring through you. whatever traumatized him, whatever made him so distrustful of the world around him and the people in it… you realized then that you represented all of that to him. you had to be different. you had to show him that you were different than all of that.

“i’ve trusted you,” you whispered, almost pleading. “i would like for you to try and trust me. please, coriolanus… i’ve never asked you for anything — just this once —“

coriolanus shook his head, dismissing you. “it’s corio.”

he slammed his lips to yours. his kiss was that of a fight; burning with every cut of anger, frustration, desperation, and sadness in his soul. you weren’t sure if he accounted for your inexperience, but you let him lead as you swallowed all of his suffering. you knew you may never be everything you wanted to be for him — but for this moment, or for whatever he would allow — you could be his escape, and he could be yours.

just this once, you both thought. just this once.

his hands were on both sides of your face, caging you in as you were at the mercy of his bittersweet affection. you tried to keep up with him, almost afraid that you wouldn’t be enough for him — but corio didn’t care. he couldn’t have cared less as he backed you into the foot of the bed. he didn’t stop kissing you as the back of your legs hit your soft mattress, and you were forced to sit down.

with his tongue tangling with yours, you managed to lift your hands to the top buttons of his shirt. he batted your hands away and went to work on his own buttons. you reached behind for your zipper to your dress and attempted to undue it.

corio then pushed your hands away with that too — ripping the zipper down its track and pushing the sleeves down your shoulders.

“corio —“ you gasped through the kiss, struggling to keep up with him.

he pulled away for a short moment, staring into your eyes. “i have denied myself being with you for so long — nothing is stopping me now.”

he held the glare, and you could only stare back at him in fright. however, that was when you realized that he had felt the same way, or at least similar — you both wanted each other, and had been scared to approach the other. your heart filled with warmth, threatening to explode, but all you could do was nod.

he seemed to calm down then, glancing down towards your lips where he prodded your bottom lip with the tip of his numb. “i have wondered for so long what it would be like to kiss my perfect wife — and now that i know, i don’t think i’ll ever give it up.”

you smiled at that. “can i tell you what i have been wondering?”

his eyes met yours once more, almost a warning. you didn’t falter, though. he replied, “yes?”

“i’ve wondered what it would be like to please you,” you spoke softly, a pink hue rising to your cheeks.

his flat look broke then, softening. a smirk greeted his features and you could see his confidence in himself rise. “my lovely wife wants to please me?”

“yes,” you spoke, holding your breath. “if you’ll let me.”

bright and striking, flames of mischief came to light in his irises. emotions of excitement and fear rose within you, and you weren’t sure which was stronger. all you could do was watch as your strong, powerful, larger than life husband stood over you, chin raised, looking down his nose at you, as he unbuckled his belt. his pants and briefs, once around his ankles, were discarded — but you didn’t see that. you couldn’t look away from his eyes — holding you, and your gaze, in place.

it was like you were an enemy he was testing. you didn’t know what he expected, let alone what would make him happy — but you hoped his expectations were slightly lower in light of your inexperience. you swallowed the hard rock of nervousness in your throat, stood up, and gestured for him to sit down on the edge of the bed. he raised an eyebrow at you, but complied. you sat down on your knees in between his, and waited patiently for direction.

“can you…” you began. “can you teach me?”

he smirked once more. “take me in your hand.”

you bent your head lower, and grabbed him by the base. he was hard and warm in your hand as you saw him trying to fight the twitching feeling in his limbs. his muscles were tight, afraid to show weakness. you grew uncomfortable — you didn’t want him weak, but you did want him to feel comfortable enough with you to enjoy a fucking blowjob.

holding his muscle upright, you stuck your tongue out and licked around the tip of his cock. he was salty, but smelled so masculine after a long day. his scent infiltrated all of your senses and had captured your attention. it made you hungry, greedy — so much so that you closed your lips around his cock and began to suck.

he jumped then. “teeth,” he spat.

you paled in embarrassment and fright — but didn’t allow your fear to show for long. you adjusted your tongue and lips — so that your top lip was folded under your top set, and your outstretched tongue covered your bottom set. hollowing out your cheeks, you took him into your mouth once more.

a low hum filled his chest.

you couldn’t see him, and could barely hear him — corio was being a selfish lover and not letting you know whether or not he was enjoying himself. he told you once before you were doing something wrong, so you tried to trust that he would tell you.

that was easier said than done, frankly. with your free hand, you reached up and began to massage his sack in the soft skin of your palm. the hum in his chest turned deeper and louder, and you felt his hips twitch once.

maybe it shouldn't have mattered that he wasn't vocal — but it wasn't like he was shy. you would not fault him for not doing something he didn't want to do, but it was like he was denying you that. if you were making him feel good, and he was fighting the volume of his moans — how fucking dare he deny you of that! there you were, constantly at his beck and call, and he couldn't even freely moan with you? you were obedient, quiet, grateful, everything he wanted — but this? this? too much. absolutely too much of an ask.

you had to do something.

"mr. president," you cooed, twisting your soft tongue around the tip of his cock. "you're awfully quiet above me."

he let out a laugh as he struggled to keep his composure. one of hands found the back of your head as his fingers struggled to tangle themselves in between your strands. they were tugging and pulling, but there was no strength in his grip. his grip — wouldn't catch. couldn't catch. corio, you husband — struggled day in and day out to keep the control in the capital and inside his castle. there was a part of you that believed he just needed to let go, let someone else be in control — but you were his pretty little wife after all. you had until death to try everything. losing control could wait, because tonight... tonight was about making corio the grateful one for once.

you let your loose grip run circles up and down the length of his cock. his shaft was wet and thick, begging the attention of the light from above so the skin was able to glisten. the tip of his cock, red and angry, almost neglected — never had you seen something so delicious, nor deserving of affection. your lips, swollen, wrapped themselves around the tip of his cock as you sucked. notes of salt and sweat mixed together on your tongue, and you hummed at the taste.

"taste sweet, mrs. snow?" you heard from above you. your eyes glanced up to find corio's eyes glazed over with pleasure. his eyelids were drooping over, and all you could think about how badly you wanted to make him close his eyes in bliss. your eyes watched his eyes, but his eyes watched the way your mouth sucked him in. "being so good for me. let your husband see what else you can do."

your ears perked in interest. you didn't know what he meant, but you were intrigued to see if he would teach you.

"please... show me what you like," you spoke, extending your neck as he lowered his face to yours.

"so eager to please..." he spoke, staring down at you in awe. his hand slid down for your scalp to cup your cheek. he looked into your eyes like he was studying you — searching for something surface level. a flaw, or something good... you weren't sure. "i suppose some would say i'm lucky."

you didn't like the sound of that... but you didn't let it show. you gave him a hint of a smile. "i don't think it matters what anyone else thinks. i think what matters is you telling me what you like... so you can decide if you're lucky or not."

he chuckled at that, but his laugh was reserved. always holding back, your husband. "you really want to be a good little wife for me... don't you?"

you fell into the strength behind the hand on your face and keened into his touch. his hand was warm against your skin. "please, corio... please let me."

he stood then, and your gaze raised with his body. you gazed up at him as he stared down at you. there his eyes went again — searching yours. he stood closer to you then, bending down slightly. "it would please me if, at any point, you told me to stop because of the pain. i don't want to hurt you." his voice was low and soft then, immediately striking you. "can i trust you to do that? hmm?"

"i'll tell you," you replied, nodding your head. "i promise."

"never break a promise you make to me," he warned.

you nodded your head once more, unsure how to proceed. he led you over to the side of the bed where he gestured for your to lie down. with the passing of time, you became more and more aware of how bare you both were in front of each other. you were ready to let down every fence of insecurity for the man before you... but there were still walls of his that threatened to come down. he was hot and cold every other moment, it seemed... and you weren’t even sure where to begin.

“husband,” you spoke, unsteadily, as he found his place between his legs. “you seem so… distrustful of me. what can i do? please, corio, i just want this moment to be special for us — for you.”

there his eyes went — searching yours again. it was like he was rereading a page in a book over and over, hoping to find the hidden message in the black and white scripture. his eyes, going back and forth, appeared to be looking over unclear smudges and scribbles as his lips began to purse. you almost said something — stopped him from withdrawing into himself, but he moved before you could.

he sat back against the pillows, which faced a mirror across your bed. you rose curiously, hoping that he would finally give you some direction. he simply took your hand in his, and gestured for you to come closer. “come,” he spoke.

in his lap, maybe? you thought curiously. you went to throw your leg over his, before he stopped you. with a furrowed brow, you watched as he adjusted you so your back laid against his chest.

“do as i say,” he whispered against your ear, sending shivers up and down your spine.

your eyes were cast to the side, his outline in your peripheral vision. you nodded, letting your lips fall apart. you felt one of his hands on the soft skin of your thigh, grazing upwards towards your hips. you almost let your eyes fall closed, hoping to lose yourself in the sensations, before corio stopped you.

with that same hand, he reached upwards and grasped your chin between his fingers. your eyes shot open as he moved your head to now face the mirror, and the pair of you in it.

shallow breaths were pushing past your lips as you stared into the mirror. your cheeks were flushed, your hair in a slight disarray, and your lips were swollen. with a flutter of your eyelashes, your gaze flickered towards corio’s reflection. your husband was always perfect — so even the slight persuasion from tidiness was a remarkable sight to you. his eyes were focused — unable to remain cool, calm, and collected as usual.

his eyes, you thought. his eyes will always tell me.

“you will watch,” corio spoke suddenly, voice hard. “you will keep your eyes on my hands. you stray, and i leave. understand?”

you nodded, looking into his eyes through the mirror.

he cocked an eyebrow.

“yes,” you spoke, almost breathless. “i understand.”

corio’s hand then found its way to your center. the tips of his finger tips, soft and hot, lightly drew a line up and down your slit. your eyes wouldn’t leave the mirror — focused on his fingertips. it was like your skin knew every correct button to tap, tap, tap. every part of you was so sensitive, so keen to his touch that you were embarrassed. you felt so pathetic against his chest, bent to his will — but you wouldn’t have had it any other way. the voice in your head was whining and hoping you would give in, just give in, let down your guard, give in, forget manners. you wanted to keep your composure as long as possible, but when corio’s middle finger found your clit…

oh… you were done for.

one of your hands immediately snapped up to find corio’s bicep and clutch onto whatever foundation he could give. you didn’t dare let your eyes meet his, even in the mirror — what if he stopped? what, huh? what then? when you were the closest you had been ever? you couldn’t allow yourself to be greedy, not when he was being oh, so selfless.

the circles he was drawing taunted your ability remain calm. he rolled your tiny clit underneath the weight of the tip of his finger and pressed down with every circle. it pushed, and pulled, and fucking pried at every fiber of your being. you could only force yourself up and back against corio, whining like a pathetic mess.

“running away from me, my sweet?” he whispered in your ear. “when i’m being so kind?”

his words bit at your ear, reminding you of your position in his world. your eyes were threatening to drift closed, hoping, praying, that corio would let you slip this once from your responsibilities. naive, you were, to believe that.

“remember our deal, wife,” he darkly cooed in your ear. “one request was all i had. i refuse to be denied it.”

“i know, i know…” you whined, rolling your hips with his hand. “it just feels so good, corio… i’ve never… no one’s ever…”

“i can tell you never knew how bad your body would crave it,” he spoke, nipping at your earlobe. “even your pussy obeys me, drenching my fingers. too sweet for this world, aren’t you?”

“just wanna be sweet for you, corio,” you whined as your vision began to blur.

the approaching orgasm was anything but a warm and fuzzy feeling around you. it was hot and jagged — making your muscles jerk, yet force your hips to roll into every movement of corio’s. the cloud over your brain felt like a warm haze of the finest whisky or tobacco the capital could offer. you were numb, drunk, and unable to process the world around you unless it was corio. his touch, his taste, his scent, his look, his orders… everything was setting you off and keeping you in place all at once. your body was hot to the touch, feverish as it tried to fight your sophistication and just fucking —

“that’s it, sweetheart. so focused on the mirror you can’t even find the strength to let go for me,” he spat, pressing a kiss to your cheek and breathing in your scent. “ride my hand like the good girl you are. you wanted to show me, remember?”

tears were brimming your eyes and blurring your vision. your teeth were gritted and bared for him. one of his hands came up to loosely grasp your throat as your hips began to spasm. it was so much, too much, so much —

“corio, please —“ you cried. “please let me look away. i can’t — i have to cry, i can’t —“

there was no softness in his movements against your aching clit. corio had now employed two fingers to dip into your core, collect your slick, and rub it along your sensitive bud in harsh circles. it sent your mind through a suffocating tube and gasping for air. you were begging, pleading — unsure what would happen if you were denied the ability to finish in peace. you began to cry in frustration and fear, so sensitive to the touch and his approval.

“corio…” you whimpered. “please, please let me…”

“do it,” he spat, holding your throat and kissing your face. “show your husband how fucking messy you can be for him.”

you grasped onto him and threw yourself back.

it was like a rollercoaster. twists and turns, yanking your body every which way. corio’s body rocked with yours as the sensations climbed and fit into every single one of your limbs. your lungs, burning, were screaming for air as you tried to fight for consciousness. the world was white, milky, foggy — unable to navigate, let alone exist in. all you could feel was corio’s body moving with yours and coaxing you through the most insane moment of your entire life.

tears fell down your face, and you struggled to conceal it. corio refused to let you hide from him. he bent his face low to yours and pressed the side of his face against the side of yours.

his breaths were heavy, similar to yours.

“corio…” you whimpered, almost whining.

“i know, sweetheart,” he cooed. “so good for me, weren’t you? asking so obediently and politely.”

you nodded, pressing your forehead against his. “i’m sorry that i was —“

“what’re you sorry for?” he demanded.

you clenched your jaw. “i was — i am — i’m worried i was too much — i was so — out of control —“

he shut you up with a kiss. coriolanus snow refused to allow you to continue, or else he knew he would be offended if he had let you finished.

“i wanted that,” he stated. “every bit of that. what, you don’t find it agonizing to be prim and fucking proper every day?”

you laughed uneasily, a bit spooked by his outburst of aggression. “i thought you — i thought that was what you wanted from me.”

he shook his head. “out there — it’s necessary. in here, when it’s only the two of us? don’t ever hide yourself from me. you must promise.”

you swallowed as your haze began to disappear. “only if you promise the same."

you saw his jaw pulse from the corner of your eye. “i promise.”

“i promise,” you returned.

you quickly reconnected your lips. you couldn't let the moment slip away. you needed to seize him while he was there — trusting you for the first time in your entire relationship. you found both of your hands on the side of his face and held him to you. corio fought for control, but you gave in immediately. the need for him to need you was stronger and more satisfying that anything else you could've experienced in that moment. you turned around, straddling his lap and pushing him down to the bed.

everything you were doing was improper: grabbing your husband, forcibly kissing him, sitting in his lap, pushing him down... you almost stopped. you almost gave into the insecurity and made friends with with meekness and shyness once more. however, you made a promise — and you intended to keep it.

"i want you inside me, corio," you whispered against his lips. "please, i want to feel you —"

"again, sweetheart?" he ripped himself from your lips to grunt out his teasing. "one taste, and you're addicted?"

you hummed approval against his lips, tangling your tongue with his. with one hand on the back of your head, holding your face to his, corio's other hand fished between the pair of you and grasped his leaking cock in his hand. the tip was red and swollen, aching for some stimulation or attention. he spread his precum over his tip and with a firm hand, corio slid his cock inside of you.

you arched your back away from corio. the feeling of him being fully sheathed inside of you bent your attention in every which was. both of your hands cradled the back of his head into your chest, where he found himself nestled between your breasts. his breaths were hot and heavy, moist against your skin. his swollen lips found one of your perky nipples and sucked it into his mouth, caving to his primal urges. coriolanus snow wanted every part of you for himself, and needed to place that claim on every part of your body. he wanted your thighs to shake and ache from being locked around him, your fingers to tremble from your hard grip, and he wanted your lips to be bruised from how hard he made you bite them. and, most of all, he wanted every loud moan to rip itself from your aching throat and fill the perfectly painted walls of this damned room.

he cursed you when you threw a hand over your mouth, and he immediately ripped it away. "don't you fucking dare," he spat.

you ignored him. he was your husband, and he was the scariest man you would ever meet, and yet you ignored him. most of all, your hips ignored him. they began to roll against his own the best they could for their inexperience. up, down, and grinding down was the best they could manage before corio grabbed you by the flesh of your hips and moved you to his liking. and when your mouth parted and a loud cry made your throat shake when he twisted your hips forward, he knew he found the spot.

"do not ever deny me what i am owed," he spat, fucking into that spot that wrapped a tight band around your abdomen. "i want to hear how good i am making you feel, and i will. i get to hear. those are mine. i am owed those."

again, you ignored him. what did he expect when your eyes began to roll back into your head and you began to match his pace? you were close, you were so, so close...

that was when corio grabbed you by the chin, refusing to let up his pace. his eyes were full of darkness, yet focus. like he had found his prey. you tried to focus, tried to give him the respect the deserved... but you couldn't. your mind was swimming, and your arching cunt was dripping down his length and onto the skin of his pelvis. you were lost. so fucking lost.

"yours, corio!" you whined. "all yours. only yours."

his voice was gruff against your lips as his thrust became rougher. "say it again."

your eyes began to drift closed as you leaned your head into the crook of his neck, rolling your hips against his. his cock had found its way to the most sensitive and purest part of you and ripped down every wall you had. you sobbed, "yours, corio. only yours."

corio threw you off of him and your back hit the bed. he was on top of you in an instant. he threw your legs up and pressed them against your chest. with your ankles on his shoulders, he pushed himself inside of you and began to relentlessly punish your perfect fucking pussy.

"mine, you got that?" he spat against your ear. "i have watched you, day after day, put on this fucking act! perfect and proper — but i made a proper whore out of the most desirable woman in the capital, didn't i? and now she's mine — forever warming my bed."

"forever, corio," you whined. your sobs were music to his ears, going straight to his cock. your cunt was raw from the friction and slick, unsure if corio should stop or keep going — but you didn't let him guess. "inside me, corio, please... want it to bad. been so good for you..."

his hand was around your throat and demanding your attention. "as if i'd waste a drop when every man in the capital would be able to see you round with my child. you want that wife? my seed, my child? you want to be fully claimed by me?"

"yes," you cried, tears falling down your cheeks. "give it to me, husband, please —"

corio reached down in between your hips and rubbed your clit with whatever energy he had left. his thrust were growing sloppy, but his movements against your swollen bud were worse. he was hissing in your ear as he continued the assault against you. your moans were loud as they escaped your lips and filled the room, setting corio's skin on fire. sweat dripped down from his brow and down his neck to mingle with yours as your second orgasm of the evening began to approach. it snapped the rubber band in your lower belly and you immediately sobbed into corio's neck. his hips continued to rut in you, forcing you down onto the bed as he swallowed all of your sobs for himself. your nails dug into his back and down his spine, hoping to rip parts from him that he had taken from you.

when corio came, you were in a stupor. cock drunk with your mouth hanging open, dazed. when corio came, one of his hands grabbed your messy pile of hair, wrenching at the roots. he pulled you to the side to suck on the sensitive skin of your neck as he pumped your cunt full of his cum. your walls were hot and sticky, full of him, but it only caused the most sickeningly warm feeling to spread throughout you. every primal need of yours was satisfied, and corio could see every bit of it on your face. the pride that welled within your husband... shameful. no man should be in possession of such an ego boost like making the prettiest, more desired woman in all of panem break from all bounds of social etiquette. you were warm, and wet, and craving every bit of his touch, so he couldn't deny you... not anymore. not when he felt the same. with each sob that left your mouth, he felt a kick in the pit of his stomach as his balls throbbed. never in his life had a woman ripped from him what he had taken from her, cheeks hot and muscles worn out.

he would regret it in the morning, maybe, but not now. no — not now.

"husband, forgive me, but..." you spoke. "my mind is a mess. i don't think i can read to you this evening."

corio rolled his eyes and laughed. "that good?"

you pressed a kiss to his lips as you hummed in approval. "never wait that long to bed your wife again."

he chuckled darkly. "watch it, sweetheart."

---

love u guys sm sorry it was so long ty for reading love u love u love u

-L xooxoxooxox

[court-jester-stuff]

Sharing a room with a not so stranger

Azriel x reader

Warnings?: reader is shorter than Azriel, not beta we die like suriel, kinda rushed? idk it's 23:54 so meh enjoy

Note: the library is based of off the acropolis and what I image Olympus would look like, so is all the rest of the Day Court. pictures from pinterest

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"So sorry to bother you," a voice said from behind you. "Can I ask you for a favour?" Turning around you came face to face with Elain. She was dressed beautifully, a light pink coloured dress with a corset with flowers embroidered onto it, sleeves of the shoulders with on the shoulders and wrist embroidered the same flowers as the corset. Her hair was loose with a few braids which all had flowers in it. Truly you’d be lying if you said she didn’t look pretty.

“That depends on what the favour is of course.” You answered her with a smile. In all honesty you hoped it would be something entertaining, these past couple of days have been fun here at the Day Court but you were slowly growing bored. This whole event was to celebrate summer solstice, the Night Court was specifically invited by High Lord Helion as a means to grow a stronger alliance. A full two weeks of celebrating and getting to know each other.

Elain looked behind her and when you followed her gaze you could see Lucien standing in the doorway smiling at her and giving her an encouraging nod.

“Would you, by any chance, …” she trailed of looking at me with an air of hesitance. Giving her a little push you asked:

“Would I…?”

Elain sighed a little but finished her sentence. “Would you mind if Azriel and I switched rooms?” She paused to let the words sink in. “I would really like to try giving this a chance and we already asked Azriel and he’s fine with it, but only if you are. And I know you two aren’t all that familiar with each other but I would really appreciate this.”

At last she stopped talking to gage your reaction only to see a little smile on your face. “My dear, I would not mind at all. You two deserve this moment to try and see where this all leads you.” She perked up at your words and you could see Lucien visibly relax in the corner of your eye. “If Azriel is comfortable with this all then I do not mind.”

She thanked you and said that they would be sure to inform Azriel of you agreeing before they both took their leave.

Once they did take their leave you started thinking about what you just agreed to. In all honesty you and Azriel hadn’t really spoken in quite a while. As members of the Inner Circle it was kind of inevitable but that still didn’t change the conversations you had had with him.

He never seemed to speak much, especially not to you. Only during the rare times that he would ask for help with an injury would you two really talk. And even then it was mostly you talking to him about how to take care of the wound even though he has probably done so a million times.

You’d always find him looking at you with deep eyes whenever you’d look up from your work. He never really seemed to take his eyes off of you while you were working. Whether he was guarded or something else you couldn’t quite decide.

Outside of that there were a few conversations you had had with the spymaster. But lately that had started to change. You were in the habit of sneaking away during each social event to lend yourself a moment of fresh air before stepping back into the crowded rooms. However these last couple of, hell, years you always seemed to get the company of a certain shadowsinger wherever you had decided to sneak of to.

Not that you mind, in all honesty you couldn’t deny the pull you felt towards him. Each conversation, each interaction left you yearning for more. You wanted to hear him speak to you, you wanted to know who he was outside of this persona he had been given.

Deciding that you should try to make things easier for the both of you lead to you walking back to the room you previously shared with Elain with the goal in mind of tidying up a bit. Once there you put away any clothing that was lying around, noting that all of Elain her stuff had already been moved.

The room wasn’t big by any means, in fact you and Elain had specifically requested a smaller sized room. There was a wall with a huge window opposite of the door with the bed against the left wall and a couch on the opposite side next to the window.

Once you deemed the room clean enough you realized that the room might be cozy for you and Elain but Azriel would have trouble getting comfortable in the bed were there someone else in it. Deciding that there wouldn’t be enough space on the bed for both you while allowing his wings to rest comfortably and without the fear of accidental touching, you made the decision to move a pillow and blanket to the couch. Moving that what was on the night stand to the little table next to the couch.

A knock on the door made you pause. Assuming that it was either Elain or Azriel you went to open the door, only to be surprised by a smiling Helion.

“High Lord.” You said with a small bow of the head. You’ve always liked the man, he was polite and kind. A bit of a flirt maybe but still aware of boundaries. And he ruled his court exceptionally well.  All people were well taken care of and very rarely did they find themselves in conflict with other courts. Compared to the Night Court which carried the looming darkness of The Court of Nightmares and Hewn City that was very admirable.

“Oh you, there is no need for such titles. Call me Helion, please.” He chuckled a bit at the formality of it all but still kept a smile on his face as he corrected you.

“Well then Helion, is there anything I can help you with?”

His smile widened a little at your question. His eyes sparkling a little. “I heard that you take care of a large portion of all the knowledge that is stored in the Night Courts library, I must say it is quite the collection. One to be proud of.”

Mirroring his smile you replied with a hint of proudness to your voice. “Yes, indeed. I travel a lot and when I do I can’t help but try to take at least one book with me to further the collection you speak so highly of.”

“Well, the Day Court does have quite the library as well and I thought that I could interest you in taking a look around.” He gestured with his hand down the left corridor.

Your gaze followed the direction from his hand before looking back inside the room. Everything seemed in order for when Azriel would arrive. “Is it just down the hallway?” You ask.

He shakes his head with the same smile on his face that has been there since you opened the door. “Why don’t I show you there, it’s a bit of a maze in here.”

You nodded and walked out into the hallway, closing the door behind you before making your way to the library. The empty hallways were filled with easy going small talk between the two of you before you eventually reached the library.

To say that it was beautiful would be an understatement. It was truly breathtaking. It looked like a place where gods would walk, the high ceilings and windows with no glass allowed as much natural light in as possible. The walls were a cream colour with beautiful paintings on the ceilings.

You should remember to tell Feyre so she could come get a look.

The bookcases were white with golden accents, they crowded the entire room except for the space right before the window. Leaving enough space for several couches and a table surrounded by chairs. Even the wood of the furniture was a light colour.

You don’t know how long you simply admired the space but when you turned around Helion was looking at you with a proud smile and a look of admiration on his face.

He clears his throat and says: “It’s beautiful is it not?” You weren’t really sure what to say. It was beautiful but outside of the beauty of it you were also surprised by its sheer size. Maybe it was the lighting but it looked so much more spacious than the library at the House Of Wind.

“It is very beautiful, I honestly don’t really know what to say. The lighting and colours are so much brighter than those of the ones we have. Even the books match the pale colours. And the amount of books here is admirable. This truly is a fine library.”

“Well, I am more than happy to have shown it to you. Please, feel free to look around and spent as much time here as you please. I’m afraid I cannot stay with you for much longer, duty calls, but rest assured that you are more then welcome in this library. Or even my court.”

You smiled slightly at his words and told him you would keep it in mind. It wasn’t for long before he excused himself and left you to your own company.

You roamed around looking for any books that peaked your interest and finally settled on a handful of them. You found another window with seating space, albeit this on smaller, and settled down on the plush couch facing slightly away from the window.

You don’t know how much time you spend sitting there but when you finally looked up from the third book that you were reading you realized that the sun had set and the sky was now adorned with stars. Granted, there weren’t as many or as bright of ones as in Valaris but it was a sight none the less.

Deciding to call it a night you got up and realised just how long you had been sitting in that same position you stretched and gathered the books you had laying around you. Walking up to the desk you left the books there for someone to find in the morning.

The hallways were quiet now, beside your own steps and breathing there as nothing to be heard.

Ones you had made your way back to your room you were very careful while opening the door as to not startle or wake up Azriel.

When the door was open far enough to slip inside you did so carefully, the room was bathed in moonlight and given the light you could see Azriel’s sleeping figure on the bed. He had moved himself fairly far to the window leaving enough space for a second person to lay down next to him if needed.

But you didn’t need to and getting in the bed would mean having to move his left wing out of the way and you weren’t about to touch the one place that Illyrians loathed to be touched.

Quietly making you way to the bathroom you quickly changed into night clothing and treaded very lightly to the couch. You laid down and when you finally settled you felt something twirling itself around your fingers. Looking down you realised it was a shadow. You smiled at it, mouthing good night before it parted from you to return to their master and with that you went off into slumber.

When you woke up again there was not yet any sunlight in the room. You looked over at the clock on the wall above the door and noted that it was almost time for sunrise. You looked over at Azriel realising he was still fast asleep and decided to take one of the books of your little makeshift nightstand before shuffling to the open balcony.

It must be a dream for winged people to be able to simply fly up to their rooms from the outside without having to first enter and walk both the hallways and stairs.

You sat down on a sofa that was located opposite to where the bed stood so you could keep an eye on Azriel in case he were to awake.

Before long the sunrise started, it was truly magnificent. The colours weren’t simply red, pink and yellow. No, you were sure you could make out nearly the entire rainbow from the sky.

You once again felt a little coolness around your fingers which finally prompted you to look away from the scenery.

“Hello you, we meet again.” You smiled softly at it while speaking in a whisper, mindful of the early time. “What are doing over here, hm? Shouldn’t you be guarding your master?”

It moved around your fingers and palm before deciding to return to the figure on the bed. Looking over you realised you had been caught making small talk with a shadow.

From the bed a tired looking Azriel looked at you with eyes of wonder. “Good morning.” You greeted. “You should go back to sleep, it’s still very early.” Which granted it was. Looking at the clock once more you saw that it read six.

He hummed as if in thought before turning his head into the pillows and stretching. His legs coming out from beneath the blanket and his wings stretching wide. They nearly hit the wall on his right from how wide they were.

He relaxed again before letting himself fall back into the mattress. For a bit you thought he had taken your advice but alas he started turning so he could sit up in bed.

His hair was frizzled and stood a little upright. He had dark circles under his eyes and a sleepy look covering his face. He blinked a few times before moving to sit with his legs over the side of the bed. The blanked had fallen and you couldn’t help but look at his chest, the muscles well defined, quite a few scars, some bigger than the others and a tattoo covering the entirety of his upper chest. It looked just like the shadows that had started swirling around him again.

Curling through his hair and around his ear, likely whispering little things they noticed or deemed important enough.

Deciding the stop gaping at the male you moved your eyes back to the other side, the sunset nearly over by now. Even though only a matter of two to three minutes could have one by the sun had risen fast. Likely a Day Court thing. It shone brightly and you could feel it’s light gently ceres your skin.

Feeling a presence nearby you noticed that Azriel had started moving towards you, yawing in the process before settling down next to you in the sofa.

You sat in comfortable silence for a bit before he spoke. “The sunrise is likely the only thing I enjoy about this court.” You smiled gently at his words before looking over at him.

He was looking at the sunrise with a small smile on his face before he turned his attention to you. His eyes seemed to soften a little bit more when they met yours.

“How did you sleep? I heard you come in quite late and you were up early.” He noted with a small furrow of his brow. Although the gentle smile stayed on his face.

“I slept pretty decent actually. I had lost myself in a book in the library so I was back rather late, I am sorry if I woke you.” You replied back, spoken in soft voices.

He assured you that you had not awoken him, rather he himself were still awake.

“I noticed one of my shadows with you this morning, they don't usually do that. Have they done that before? Because I’ll tell them off if they make you uncomfortable, although I must say that it did not seem that way just now.”

You beamed slightly at his words. “I don’t mind at all, in fact they are rather nice.” You smiled a little brighter as some of them immediately darted towards you, some playing with your fingers other roaming around, a few even went into your hair.

Azriel looked slightly startled as they did this. “I think last night while I went to lay down was the first time. Whichever one it seemed to have wanted to come say goodnight to me.” You thought for a bit, admiring them before realisation hit you. “Wait, actually, I think they might have done that before. Back during Solstice a few of them curled around my arm when I passed you. I completely forgot about that.”

You looked over at him and he seemed to be deep in thought, his brow was really furrowed now and his smile was no longer. When he didn’t seem to snap out of it you placed your hand on his wrist.

He blinked in surprise before looking at you hand on him which had him frowning once more.

You removed your hand before clearing you throat. “Sorry, I would have taken your hand but you seem to always shy away when people do that. I shouldn’t have assumed that your wrist would be any different.”

He looked up at you expression unchanging. He opened his mouth to say something right as a knock sounded from the door. You looked over at it before deciding to go over and see who it was. You looked back over at him to see him still staring. You gave him a little smile, after apologizing again you stood up and made your way to the door.

You opened it just after another knock sounded and were surprised to see your own High Lord.

He looked slightly surprised by you before giving a smile. “Well good morning, it seems our dear Azriel is in good hands then.” He chuckled softly, mindful of those still sleeping.

Just as you were about to ask him what was wrong or what he had meant you felt a hand on your waist. While the other grasped the door besides your head.

“Can we help you Rhys?” Azriel sounded kind of agitated, a clear difference from simple moments ago. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was because Rhysand was here or because you touched his wrist.

“Not necessarily, I simply wanted to check in on you both. I had heard from Feyre that Elain and our dear Azzy here had switched rooms.” He said the last part while grinning at you.

Before either of you could say anything else Azriel decided that the High Lord and his brother had overstayed his welcome. “If you aren’t here for a decent reason could you let us be?”

He surprised you with that but the high fea before you seemed unbothered, maybe even pleased.

“Of course, of course. I wouldn’t want to bother you two. Remember that meeting we have at nine.” He barely finished speaking when Azriel pulled you back into him begore closing the door.

You both stood there for a moment until you decided to turn around. Only then did you notice how close he really was and how very bare his chest still was.

After a second of standing in a daze staring at his chest and tattoo you seemed to come back to reality when you moved backwards a step, which in turn caused your back to hit the door. You looked up and Azriel followed your step until his arm was pressed into the door above your head.

He leaned in slightly while you tilted your head upwards to try and look at him properly. If you didn’t know better you’d say he was blushing.

“I don’t mind you touching my wrist. Or my hand.” He paused while looking at you. He leaned in even more, noses nearly touching. “I never mind when it’s you.”

You both held eye contact between each other until his gaze flicked over your face as if searching for something. Eventually he pulled away and you smiled at him, hoping he couldn’t hear the loud drumming of your heart.

Later you found yourself once again in the library. Azriel left at eight, presumably for the meeting Rhysand was talking about. And given that you were once again alone in your room and that you could read the books you had with you you could read another time you decided to return to the library.

A good portion of the day had passed, before you knew it the empty plate upon which the dinner that one of the helpers had given you had been cleared and replaced with coffee.

You finished yet another book and decided to try and find a book you had been looking for for a while. While strolling through the aisles you couldn’t help but have the feeling that you were being watched.

You wondered if it was something alike the House or Byraxsis. Although you doubted that something as ‘terrifying’ could be found in the Day Court.

Not to lie you had always enjoyed the presence of Byraxsis, you would read to it after a long day. And sometimes, just sometimes they would ask a question or ask for a book you could read.

You missed them sometimes, although the same cannot be said about Cassian.

When you reached for a book you noticed that you were once again joined by a little shadow. You smiled at it before returning to looking for your book.

When you were about to enter another aisle the little shadow decided to pull you a different way. You ended up three aisles down from where you were going. The little shadow kept going before stopping before a specific bookcase. You looked around it for a bit, curious at what the littlz thing would want to show you and that’s when you saw just the book you were looking for.

When you went to thank the little one, you realized that it was nowhere to be found.

Shrugging it off you decided to focus on the matter at hand. To get the book that was placed about a meter and a half above you. You tried to reach it by standing on your tiptoes before someone reached out above you to take it of the shelve.

You immediately recognized the scars on the hands, the siphons and the little shadows that had once again decided to dance along your skin.

Lowering your hand you turned around to see Azriel leaning over you in the same way he had been that morning. Except this time he was smiling softly, it tugged on a heart string to see him smile like that. Gods what you wouldn’t do to see him smile like that more.

“A bit short aren’t you.” It wasn’t a question as much as it was a tease. You huffed but smiled and thanked him for the book. But just as you went to reach for it he held it out of your reach. The smile on his face widened at your playful glare. You reached for it again but this time he held it above his head. So you decided to step closer until you were practically chest to chest and place one hand on his chest and raise one to reach for the book.

He seemed surprised by your boldness and movement that his arm went slack and you managed to lower it and grab the book.

You smiled at the look on his face and patted his chest. You took a step back.

“I’m surprised to see you here. Wasn’t expecting it.” You said softly to respect the space.

He shrugged and smiled. “Maybe I wanted to read and saw a damsel in distress.” You laughed a little, denying being a damsel or in distress. He leaned in closer with is head and upper body and added. “Or maybe I just wanted to see you.”

You flushed at that and he laughed quietly, deciding that you were red enough he gestured for you to follow while he offered his arm. Which you took.

He led you to where you had sat yesterday and took a book of his own. He sat down besides you on the couch and started reading.

You finished your book rather fast and decided to read another and another. As did he, only he didn’t read nearly half of what you read.

Once it started getting late, and both of you began to get hungry he announced that you should be retire to the bedroom. You obliged, still you toom the books with you to the front desk so they could be placed where they needed to be. He smiled at you once that happened and once again offered his arm.

Back in the room, you both decided to wear something more comfortable. Azriel had once again ditched his shirt and opted for loose black sweatpants instead of his leathers.

The food was delivered to the door and you both ate in silence until he spoke up.

“Why did you sleep on the couch tonight?" You raised your head from your food and blinked at him. “I mean there was enough space for us both and as much as it is pretty that couch does not look comfortable.”

You smiled perhaps a bit sheepish and said: “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, you had already moved so for to the right and still there was little space. I definitely would have touched you, which I thought you were uncomfortable with. And I would have had to move your wing and even now that is a boundary I will not cross. Especially not in your sleep.”

He smiled softly at you and his eyes softened. “I wouldn’t mind you sleeping in the bed with me. Not at all.”

And so that’s how you ended up next to the shadowsinger. It was well past midnight and it appears that Azriel had found sleep, the same could not be said for you.

The blanket had little weight and was very thin. But getting out of the bed would mean waking Azriel zo you bared with it.

After a count you turned your head to Azriel to find him already looking at you. Startled at first your eyes widened before turning into a smile to match his own. You turned on your side to look at him better and did he look good.

His sleepy smile paired with that dammed look in his eyes.

“Why do you look at me like that?” you asked.

A beat passed, then he sighed and said: “Because you are simply stunning.”

A blush crept up your face. “So are you, dammed handsome truly.”

You thought that he would laugh or say something back but instead his face faltered. It hurt to watch that, you frowned and wondered why that happened. Did he not believe you? Does he think you’re lying?

No, that’s not possible, I mean look at him. But his smile went completely and you felt such dread seeing it ago, and that’s when it happened.

Snap

…

“You…. You’re..” You weren’t sure what to say. It’s like your entire world got flipped upside down.

“Wait, you can feel it?” He said, leaning on his elbow. Your mouth opened and closed before you nodded with disbelief. He knew?

His smile started returning before he started reaching for me. Although he stopped abruptly, he looked at his hands and before I knew is I had taken them in mine and placed a kiss on the knuckles, the back of them and both palms.

His eyes glossed and his voice sounded so little as he asked: “You don’t mind? You don’t mind that it is me that is your….” His voice trailed off at the end.

“I do not, truly I am utterly delighted.” You took the side of his face in your hand while guiding him to lay back down. “I am more than happy to be your mate, Azriel.”

His eyes scanned mine for a lie, a single hesitation and when he found none he said upright and brought both wings to the correct sides. He gestured for me to sit up so I did. He laid back down with now the wing beneath me.

I hesitated and he told me once again: “I don’t mind when it’s you.”

So begrudgingly you laid down on his arm atop his wing while the other draped over you, along with his arm and shadows. The added weight was welcome and so was the warmth against the chilly air.

“How long have you known?” You ask.

“Remember Solstice two years ago, when we were having one of our conversations again?” You nodded. “And how all of a sudden I had to make the worst excuse ever to leave?” You nodded again.

“Well, you had said that my shadows were adorable and you called them ‘little ones’ ande then it just… snapped. I panicked cuz I did not know what to do, I almost spilled it all right then and there but I felt like you deserved better… or at least for it to be natural. Honestly even before the bond I really liked you, you should ask Rhys and Cass. They have some stories of me trying to impress you and it going terrifically wrong.”

You laughed and stared in wonder, you mate is a dork. And you love him. So you told him just that.

“I would love to het to know you better, truly. But know that even before and now still, I love you. My mate is such a dork and I’d love to hear all the stories.”

His arms wrapped around you tighter and the shadows seemed to do the same. And so you both laid there in each other’s arms.

[potofstewie]

The Mechanic

The Lowdown: All you wanted was to get your tire fixed on this hot summer day...and maybe a lil something extra to beat the heat. Luckily, your trusty mechanic Haganezuka Hotaru knows just what you need.

The things to know: AFAB!Reader, chubby!Reader, Blackfem!Reader, Teasing, both Reader and Hotaru are in their late twenties, hair pulling (m. receiving), domish!Hotaru, choking, missionary, body worship, fingering, cunnilingus, creampie, overstimulation, attempted murder

Pairing: Mechanic!Haganezuka x Reader

W/C: 4.2K

A/N: This was, a 4-month struggle. Motivation was at an all time low, went on hiatus, reblogs were/still are scarce and I was in the lows. But then I said "you know what, my babies need to eat. I have to do what I have to do to make sure we eat." So I popped my pussy on this because as a mother I make sure my babies are fed their fanfiction. This fic was inspired by the above panel from GANSTA. ANYWAY ENJOY MWUAH

“Hey, Haganezuka!” 

You lifted your gaze towards an annoyed Kanamori who stood in the doorway of the mechanic shop. “It’s 97° right now! I’m leaving for the day so take a break, you hear Haganezuka?! That goes for you too, y/n! Don’t be a stubborn idiot like him!” He nagged before retreating into the air conditioned shop, not caring to wait on a reaction from the two of you. A soft sigh left your glossed lips as you gazed upwards into the cloudless summer sky, the sun harshly beating down upon the earth. All you wanted to do was get your tire changed but alas, Hotaru Haganezuka had other plans.

You had to agree with Kanamori, it was way too hot to be outside. Especially when you’re standing in a shadeless mechanic lot watching the very man that insisted on doing every little thing possible to your car from checking the oil to changing the battery. “Don’t be an idiot, a mechanic must always check these things! Just leave it to me!” Is what he proclaimed, arguing that you should be grateful that he was willing to do so much on the spot. Contemplating Kanamori’s demand, you looked back down at Hotaru, working in a silent frenzy as he changed your battery. 

You couldn’t tell if it was due to the heat or your emotions, but you felt your cheeks burn as you watched him. You didn’t mind admitting it, Hotaru was a bit of a looker; especially now. His long black hair had been tied back in a bun, loose strands sticking out and some on his forehead while his thick sharp-angled eyebrows furrowed in concentration. A black t-shirt rested on the back of his neck leaving his muscled torso exposed to the sweltering heat; the top part of his mechanics jumpsuit tied around his waist. Wiping the sweat off your chest with your tank top, you watched in silent awe as a single trail of sweat ran down his arm; bicep flexing with every crank of the ratchet. 

“Aren’t you gonna go inside?” You asked, watching his glove covered hands work with practiced movements. You stopped yourself from sighing as the image of his fingers rapidly pumping into your sopping pussy entered your mind. Instinctively gripping the bottom of your shorts, you tried to keep yourself in check, pussy squeezing at nothing but disappointing air. For about a year now you’ve had a thing for Hotaru. However, with his stand-off nature and how busy he was, it was a bit difficult to get closer with him on a more personal level. 

A throb rang inside you as you watched Hotaru slowly stand at his full height, leaning back slightly as desired hands held the old battery. “I’m busy. Why don’t you go in?” He wiped a few strands of hair away from his forehead as he set down the battery and picked up the new one, his sharp hazel eyes side-eyeing you from a half-lidded gaze. “It’s not like you’re doing anything. You’re just torturing yourself with this damn heat.” And with his last word, he leaned back into the engine, eyes focusing on the task at hand. 

You wiped your sweat covered palms on your shorts as you looked towards the street. Despite the heat being troublesome, people still walked around, loud music blaring from passing cars. “You know I only came here to get my tire changed. If anything, you’re the one torturing yourself with all this extra stuff.” You retorted, settling your gaze back to the man next to you as you crossed your arms.

“You should be glad I’m doing this at all. For free, no less.” He mumbled, wagging the ratchet in your direction. You played with the hem of your tank top as Hotaru grabbed his shirt and wiped his face, dark eyes fixated on your plush thighs that soaked in the sunlight, giving them a delectable glow. He softly exhaled as he eyed the bit of fat that spilled from your shorts, the fabric being a little tight on your thighs. He’d give anything to touch your thighs, to have them encase his head as he sucked on your sensitive bud and licked at your drenched folds. To feel your thighs wrap around his waist as he pounded into your tight cunt relentlessly.

“Why for free? Not that I’m complaining.” You inquired, desperately hoping to get a full conversation out of the asocial man while snapping him out of his lewd thoughts. If the conversation wasn’t about cars or the neighborhood kid Tanjiro that accidentally destroyed his prized motorcycle that one time, Hotaru would be a clam. With a sigh, he closed the hood before facing you, finally finished with his self assigned work and leaned on the side of the car.

“Think of it as a one time deal, you are a valued customer after all.” He answered plainly, trying his hardest not to watch a sweat drop disappear down your cleavage. You hummed at his answer, curious eyes traveling across the prominent veins in his crossed forearms. You envisioned his work worn fingers encasing your throat, his words almost going out one ear. “However, I wouldn’t mind some dango as payment.” 

“Just..dango?” You stepped closer to him, confidence flowing through your veins. Maybe it was the heat getting to you or the boredom of doing nothing except standing around, you didn’t know exactly what came over you. But you hoped that maybe he too was on the same page. You couldn’t be any more right. With the ghost of a smirk, Hotaru uncrossed his arms and closed the gap between you both, the smell of his cologne wafting into your nose. You felt immense heat rise to your cheeks as he slowly took off a glove, one by one pulling it from his fingers, his eyes never leaving yours. 

“You got something better?” One glove off, the other to go. You bit your bottom lip slightly as you nodded, your cherry flavored lip gloss enchanting him. With his pointer finger and thumb loose in his glove, Hotaru scoffed, happy about the new direction the day was taking. “You wanna show me, pretty girl?” With a quick tug, he finally took off his glove and shoved them in his back pocket before quickly pulling you closer, evoking a soft gasp from your lips. As a soft hum rumbled from his chest, his rough hands found refuge on your soft and plump ass; rubbing it in slow, small circles with slight pressure from the base of his palms as if he was a masseuse. 

“But, we’re out in public..” You said slowly, trying to remind him of where the two of you were but you couldn’t help but stare deeply into his lust filled eyes, his gaze slowly lowering to your agape lips. With an answering hum, Hotaru squeezed your ass slightly before placing his thumb under the hem of your shorts, the digit rubbing the lace on your underwear. 

“So?” He said simply, thumb and finger lightly tilting your chin up as he inched his lips closer to yours. “Let ‘em watch.” And with a short exhale, his soft lips crashed with yours; your lip gloss making its sticky mark on him. A soft moan escaped your throat as his tongue swiped at your bottom lip; asking for permission. You felt another, more harsh, squeeze on your ass as you caved in and gave him entry, his tongue immediately exploring and dancing with your own. The warmth of his velvet lips did nothing but cause you to sink further into the addictive feeling of lust that overwhelmed your senses. You were caught in a mind numbing daze as Hotaru finally pulled back from the intense kiss, a string of saliva connecting the both of you. 

As soft pants left your messy lips, he left a small, ticklish kiss to your neck. “I don’t wanna give them an entire show..c’mon.” With a sly smile and his hands still cradling your ass, Hotaru began to walk towards the shop, forcing you to awkwardly walk backwards. A chuckle left Hotaru as he relished in the awkward position he had you in, finding enjoyment in your flustered expression. 

“Hotaru..” You pleaded, your mind buzzing with the endless things that could happen, your pussy pulsating with every step taken towards the office and light squeeze Hotaru would gift to your plump ass. Once you both crossed the threshold to the messy office, his lips immediately found yours again, lightly nipping at your bottom lip as he pushed the door closed with his foot and guiding you to the messy desk. Momentarily removing himself from the sweet taste of your lips, Hotaru wiped off all the papers that were strewn on the desk before roughly planting your ass on the width of the dark wood; eyes swimming with carnal desire. 

Rubbing his hands up and down your thighs, Hotaru left a hot kiss on your clavicle before latching on and evoking a soft moan from your mouth. Kicking off your slides as your nimble hands snaked their way up to his neck, pulling off the shirt that he left there before tangling your fingers into his dark hair. You tugged gently at his scalp as he started peppering his bites and kisses all over your chest, a low groan slowly leaving his body. Pulling away once more, his eyes zeroed in on the cute stomach pudge you had. He wanted to run his rough hands over the soft body part and be hypnotized by it. Lifting off your tank top and pulling down your bra, Hotaru dived back in for his new target, mouth latching onto your nipple, his tongue running over your dark areola.

A saccharine moan was ripped from you as you felt his teeth nip and pull at the hardened numb while his rough hands unclasped and threw your bra to the side before gently pressing on your stomach, urging you to lay back. Following his command, you could feel his hands snake even lower, fingers tugging both your shorts and panties off. On instinct you widened your legs, the cold air kissing your folds while Hotaru brought his waist closer between your legs, still preoccupied by your irresistible breasts. Placing more kisses, Hotaru trailed them upward to your neck before stopping, his thumb lightly touching your clit. You released a soft whine as his thumb slowly started to massage your clit in small circles.

As his mouth left marks upon your neck, your hand gripped his forearm as you felt his fingers slowly enter into you. Feeling a sharp canine graze your warm skin, you released a soft gasp that signaled Hotaru to pump his fingers into you slowly. Lewd noises echoing in the office with every slow draw back and hard pump his fingers did to your pussy. 

“I know you want more than this, right ma?” He teased, his pants growing tighter as he soaked in your naked body. Fingers prodding your folds and getting themselves coated in your slick only deepened Hotaru’s hunger for you, for your taste. With a slight nod, your hands found themselves fondling your breasts awaiting whatever action this man would do next.

With a deep hum, Hotaru licked his fingers clean of your nectar before trailing more of his hot kisses south. From your neck to your stomach and to the edge of your clit, his searing kisses sent tingles up your spine. As he left kisses on the inside of your thighs, you couldn’t help but squirm a bit, the anticipation killing you. “Don’t rush me, Princess. I’m getting there, just leave it to me, alright?” He spoke, his breath gently gracing your impatient cunt. With another hum, his mouth finally latched onto your pussy, an airy moan leaving your lips. Hotaru’s tongue ran itself over and between your folds that were accompanied with intervals of harsh sucking to your clit. 

Soft mewls drifted from your lips as your fingers traversed and gripped and tugged onto his black locks, undoing his bun further while your other hand kneaded and rolled one of your abandoned breasts. His rough hands held your thighs with an iron grip as you squirmed and relished in the feeling of his warm tongue gliding in between your folds, drinking in your nectar. With a final suck on your clit, Hotaru began dragging his tongue upwards on your body; stopping right in the valley of your breasts as the interesting taste of your cocoa butter lotion settled on his tongue. 

Raising himself up, Hotaru couldn’t help but be immersed in the beauty your body exuded, from the pudge of your stomach to how erect your nipples were as they battled the cold air. Muttering a low “fuck” to himself, he slowly started to undo the sleeves of his jumper that were tied to his waist and watched your once blissed face contort to one of anticipation and desperation. Hotaru knew exactly what he was doing, taking his sweet time, testing you. Seeing how far he can go with his slow, sensual movements before you snapped and pleaded with him to run his rough hands on your body once more. 

With his head tilted down and eyes looking up at your face through his dark lashes, his hands languidly freed himself from his clothing, the ghost of a smirk gracing his façade as he watched you take in the view. Your body shivered with both excitement and worry as he finally stood before you in the nude. A dark happy trail guided your curious eyes downwards to his hardened dick. In all its 8-inch glory, his hardened dick carried a bead of precum on its reddened mushroom tip; a large vein adorning its underside. With a bit lip, you watched with desire as he lined himself to your entrance but stopped abruptly, tip a mere hair breadth from your impatient and needy cunt. It was almost like a shot of molten lava coursed through your veins when your eyes angrily shot up to his face and witnessed his mouth slowly form into that of a mocking smile; mischief ladened eyes watching your reaction. 

“Are you fucking for real right now? You’re a fucking di-” Your insult was cut with a breathy inhale as you felt his cock finally enter your sopping cunt, the stretch giving you a burning yet intoxicating sensation. A shuddered breath of pleasure morphed into a low chuckle as Hotaru relished in both your reaction to his cruel teasing and to the feeling of his cock slowly being engulfed by your warm walls. His rough hands held you by your waist, eyes watching your chest shudder with each inching movement within your pussy. 

“What was that? I didn’t hear you..” Hotaru teased as your hands encased his own as his pelvis finally met with your skin. With a slow sigh, Hotaru rubbed his thumbs on your hip bones, giving you a chance to get used to his size. Giving you a chance to talk more shit. 

“C’mon, tell me what you were gonna say, I wanna know..” He mocked as he slowly drew his hips back, the feeling of his thick cock dragging along the ridges of your pussy eliciting a soft moan from you. You squeezed his fingers as you screwed your eyes shut, trying your hardest to contain your annoyance. Despite how much you hated the teasing and mocking Hotaru has been doing thus far, you couldn’t help but enjoy the throbs his cruel actions gave to your pussy. 

“I-I said you’re a fucking dick!” Your declaration ended in a squeaked out high note as Hotaru harshly thrusted into you, the desk creaking with his action of shutting you up. Choked out gasps and mewls from your gloss smeared lips interlaced with that of the creaking wood as Hotaru began his cruel treatment to your squelching pussy. Your legs quickly wrapped around his waist as your pussy finally got what it had longed for.

Admittedly, you didn’t know what you were expecting when this moment finally arrived. Yes, you had your expectations in the dark of night when your fingers occupied the warm and soft confinements of your pussy; your mind thinking nothing but how big you hoped he was, if he was either a rough and carnal lover or a slow sensual one, even if he preferred doggy over missionary. But this, ohh, this was beyond your expectations. The pulses of pleasure that emitted from your pussy and traveled throughout your nervous system, the iron grip he had on your waist, and the low grunts and groans rumbling from your favorite mechanic was nothing you expected yet all that you had dreamed for. 

An airy chuckle escaped Hotaru’s lips as he sank further into the pure bliss of his cock being squeezed by your greedy cunt, a nice coating of your cream decorating his equally pleasure hungry cock. The sight of that alone sent shockwaves throughout his body, urging him to thrust faster. Removing his bruising grip on your waist, he unwrapped your legs from his body and pushed them towards your head; work worn hands holding the backs of your knees as sweet moans fell from your mouth at the newfound depth, Hotaru swearing under his breath as he felt his tip give your cervix bruising kisses. 

“Look at all that fucking cream..acting like you can’t stand me, shit..” A rumbling groan interrupted Hotaru’s dirty mocking, the tightness of your pussy nearly sending him into a nonverbal state. “But I know that if I stopped, you’d beg for more..” Hotaru leaned forward, pressing a lopsided kiss to the side of your knee as he drank in your cock drunk expression; lidded eyes rolling back and staccato moans wavering from your agape mouth. Hotaru’s eyebrows twitched in annoyance with your lack of answer, his hips abruptly stopping as a hand encased your throat. 

“Hey, answer me. I won’t start again if I don’t get an answer.” He demanded, ignoring how your abandoned leg pitifully kicked in the air for his grasp again. Your mind was too fuzzy to properly grasp just what was going on, but a quick squeeze to your throat brought you to attention. “You gonna beg for more, mama?” The belittling question dripped from Hotaru’s mouth like honey as you whined, wiggling your waist to finish what you both started. 

“Fuck! Yes, I need you! Please, Hotaru, keep going!” At your wits end, you finally answered the man’s degrading question, body desperately craving for its release. With a satisfied low hum, Hotaru began again but faster; the desk getting louder with each harsh thrust gifted to your needy pussy. You could feel the sticky liquid your pussy oozed out pool onto the desk as Hotaru’s hands nearly folded you in half; the mechanic close to his own relief. 

A rough hand came down to your sticky and stretched pussy, thumb rubbing circles on your sensitive clit that sent bouts of pleasure through your body. Each swift movement his thumb did against your puffy bud, you couldn’t help but have your pelvis follow close behind. His thumb goes up, your hips raise. His thumb goes down, your hips follow. The intricate yet harsh dance your bodies did resounded in the dusty office, the desk crying out from all the force, warning of splintering damage.

Your mechanic was absolutely enchanted with it all. He enjoyed seeing your pussy practically be a suction cup; with each draw back your cunt seemed to hold on, practically begging him to stay inside, begging for him to keep going, begging to be painted white with his seed. “I’ll m-make you feel good..fuck, just leave it to me..” Hotaru promised before folding you even further, lips roughly melding with yours and swallowing every pathetic mewl and moan. His lips traveled to your jaw as your vision became spotted and blurry; your release approaching steadfast. 

“ ‘M gonna- ‘M gonna, fuuck, ‘M-” Your choppy declaration couldn’t leave your spit covered lips properly as each thrust interrupted you and forced you to restart your sentence. If Hotaru had half a mind, he would’ve stopped right in his tracks again and have you plead for your orgasm. Fortunately for you, his own release was nearly there, evident by his thrust getting ever so sloppy with each push into your stretched pussy. 

“Y-yeah? Gonna cum f’me baby?” His words sent a throb to your cunt, your head nodding sluggishly. A breathy chuckle left Hotaru as your hands encased his own that held onto the back of your knees. “Fuuck, you can do it baby..cum on this cock, lemme hear you..” As if on command, your body jerked. A choked, drawn out moan resounded from your mouth as your back arched up, your orgasm running its course through your body. 

You pussy contracted on his dick with every jerk your body did as you endured your powerful yet anticipated release. It felt as if you reached nirvana; bliss being the only thing coursing through your mind. Your mechanic, on the other hand, was starting to lose it. He wanted to keep going, to drag this out as much as possible, but your orgasm did nothing but foil his plan. Sweet, high and barely restrained whimpers tumbled from his lips as he basked in your contractions. 

Coming down from your high, you couldn’t help the tears welling up in your eyes from the overstimulation of his thrusts; Hotaru’s pathetic whimpers coaxing you to pay attention to him, to see your quick to anger, hard to understand and hard to socialize mechanic be reduced to a pitiful state as his orgasm finally arrived. 

Hotaru’s whimpers abruptly stopped as his hips staggered, only producing miniscule thrusts as his hot cum decorated your tight and sopping walls; his fingers twitching with each pulse of cum. As if a switch flipped in his head, your mechanic groaned deeply and loudly as his body lurched forward, subconsciously trying his hardest to go as deep as he possibly could into your cum stuffed pussy. Shaky, heavy pants heaved from him as you groaned softly at the newfound sensation of his cock emptying inside you, some of it oozing out of your cunt. 

Sighing heavily, the spent mechanic slowly and carefully pulled out, eyes entranced by the sight of your mixed liquids stretch into thin lines connecting you two as his cock fully left you. Long, rough fingers lowered themselves to your entrance and separated your folds more, the gentle action sending a slight shockwave through you. He was absolutely enthralled by your gaping and abused cunt. His fingers continued playing in your pussy, ears completely deaf to your moans of overstimulation. 

In and out. In between folds, up and down. Those were the simple yet powerful dance moves Hotaru’s fingers did, his mind blank besides the fascination of seeing your messy cunt decorated. This state of mind was similar to the one he’d be in whenever working on the current machine in the lot. Your legs twitched with each move his fingers did against your battered and bruised pussy. “H-Hotaru, you’re gonna make me cum..” your soft, tearful declaration received no response from the mechanic who was too deep in his work. 

To your, albeit painful, enjoyment, his fingers kept dancing nonstop despite your mewls and words of pleasure. With hitched breaths, you couldn't help the pleasure formed tears decorate your lashes as your second orgasm came fast approaching. Cum coated thumb and pointer finger gently pinched and rubbed your clit, your sensitive and delicate bud eliciting electricity through you. As if on cue with Hotaru’s newfound enjoyment with your clit, your second release finally came. 

Saccharine moans dripped from your mouth as it washed over you, your body shivering with each intense pulse of pleasure. It wasn’t until you reached out and gripped Hotaru’s veiny forearm that he stopped his unintentional torture; his sharp eyes leaving their enchanted state and giving you a look of puzzlement. Hotaru was confused as to why you stopped him. Couldn’t you see he was busy toying with your pussy? “What’s the problem?”

An airy chuckle of disbelief flew from your mouth as you carefully raised yourself up on your elbows, dull pain starting to form below the waist. “You’re awful, y’know that ‘Taru?” Hotaru’s large hand encased yours as he pulled you forward, helping you sit up properly. A slowly growing smirk adorned his face as it finally dawned onto your mechanic what he’d done. 

“What do you me-” Before he could properly feign innocence, a loud crash emitted from outside followed by a loud and rushed ‘I’m so sorry, Haganezuka-San! It happened again!’ You watched your mechanic in absolute confusion as he swore loudly and hastily got dressed, rushing to pull a knife from the desk drawer. “That fucking idiot! Tanjiro! Don’t run away from me!” 

“Wait!-” Your words died out as your ever so hot tempered mechanic ran out, not caring to clean you up or even just talk to you for a bit. You sat there, stumped on what just transpired, your mind running over all the things that happened from watching your crush fix your car, getting absolutely fucked out of your mind by your crush, and watching your crush attempt to murder a child. Truthfully, you wondered if moving forward in the future with him as your new source of pleasure was worth putting up with his attitude. As the dust particles in the air floated and the ticking of the wall clock filled the silence of the room, you reached your firm conclusion.

It’s fucking worth it.

ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛᴇ, ꜱᴛᴇᴀʟ, ʙɪɴᴅ ᴏʀ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ ᴀꜱ ʏᴏᴜʀꜱ. ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛꜱ ɢᴏ ᴛᴏ ᴘᴏᴛᴏꜰꜱᴛᴇᴡɪᴇ™ 2023

Tags: @chrollohearttags @tojisblondebimbo @toji-dabi-wife @comatosebunny09 @nymphoheretic @spaceforher @love-2-fast @p3ach-gyals @itmightbejo @jellymantra33 @bontensbabygirl @chickenwingsandfries3425 @starrbright @sleepdepriveddork @haji-me-mashite @namjoonsbuspass @koyukiki @twisteddaydreams1135 @garie-gary @heavenlysageee @prettypurplebirb @bigmooncheeks @mousepillz @jenuchi @lunerenzo @bigmooncheeks @heibunniie @doveyrei @wntrsblvd @gobblethiskitty @ezay @marusatonanhin @chile-im-embarrassed @thickbihhwitdagapp @conniesluvrgyal @jasminefaerie @namidaass @tiazvni @ffushiquro @partypom @dawn-bunni @katymae12344 @iluvlay0111 @breadslut69 @grungedog13 @levismommymilker3000 @unknownaqxa @bookworm0ctavia

[lunarimagines]

ATEEZ REACTION TO THEIR BFF HOOKING UP/BEING FWB WITH ANOTHER MEMBER

anon said: Hii, can I please request an ateez reaction to his crush (who's also his best friend) being friends with benefits with another member? Thank uu

warnings: sexual themes, language

A/N: you can now support me on Ko-fi! click [here]

Seonghwa: Seonghwa likes to pretend he's above playing truth or dare, but he's four shots in and sitting in the circle almost giddy as he watches the bottle spin to land on the next person. Wooyoung had just gone, daring San to drink a tablespoon of hot sauce and San was spinning the bottle.

"Y/N!" San yelled, words slurring together ever so slightly. The glazed look in his eyes was enough to know he was truly drunk. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth." Your last dare had been to dunk your sock in the toilet so you stood to loose a lot. Like your other sock.

"Okay, um. Have you ever... hooked up with Seonghwa. Be honest. You two are friends so..."

Seonghwa nearly choked on air. He coughed dryly, eyes going wide as he tried to signal San to shut the fuck up before he told everyone Seonghwa was one smile away from falling in love with you.

"No, we've never hooked up. But Hongjoong and I have when we were friends with benefits." Okay, maybe you were drunk, too.

Hongjoong giggled and Seonghwa felt like he was going to throw up, and the liquor couldn't even be blamed for it.

"But! I like someone else," you whispered, leaning closer to Seonghwa. The image of the two of you have sex, you riding him, replaced the horrific image of you having sex with Hongjoong in his head.

Needless to say your second time having sex with Seonghwa was when he was your boyfriend and you were both sober.

Hongjoong: Hongjoong like to pride himself as the perfect gentleman and someone who knew how to woo the person he liked. He bought little trinkets or treats he found on his way home from schedules in convenience stores or subways stations because he kept finding things that made him think of you. He remembered special events and days, always asking how things went after a presentation at school or a tough day at work. He would have done this simply because he was your best friend, but he also did it because he loved you as something more.

So when Yunho called him, frantic, at 2am one morning to tell him the two of you had hooked up and he maybe sort of probably liked you, Hongjoong felt first happy that you were getting some and then something like terrified and frustrated - terristrated? - that he wasn't the one to give you everything.

"Yunho, call down, my God. It's okay. Did Y/N say anything?"

"No, no. Called a taxi. Work tomorrow or something." Hongjoong knew. He had your schedule memorized after accidentally calling you during a work meeting once. "But I think Y/N likes someone else."

"Oh?" Hongjoong tried, and failed, to sound neutral. Yunho didn't offer more and Hongjoong simply told him to sleep it off and think about it tomorrow after he was rested.

After the phone call from Hell, he texted you.

hongjoongie joong: yunho? woof

you: rude as hell

you: but no, not yunho anymore

hongjoongie joong: you don't have to tell me

you: damn and here i was going to confess to you in the most romantic moment after i fucked your best friend and band mate

hongjoongie joong: you have me blushing and giggling and kicking my feet fr

you: take me out on a date and i'll really have you giggling and blushing and kicking your feet

hongjoongie joong: seriously?

you: yes

you: unless you don't want to

you: but when I was thinking of you the whole time i was with Yunho it was a sign from the universe or whatever

you: i'm off at 5:30

hongjoongie joong: i know. i'll be there to pick you up for our date!

Your first date with Hongjoong was like every other time you went out with your best friend, but this time you could kiss him. He would still be your best friend first but now, he would be your boyfriend second. He also never stopped giving you shit for it taking having sex with Yunho to realize you liked him, forever destined to be "cliché loser" in his phone.

Yunho: Yunho had picked you up from your apartment for your monthly "terrible cooking show remake" where you would try and make the recipe as seen on a cooking show. No rewinding, no saving the recipe, no looking it up. The food was pretty hit or miss, but watching you frustrated, chewing on your lip with furrowed brows was worth eating even the worst recreations.

Currently he was trying to goad you into doing karaoke in the car with him. His favorite pastime was teasing you and trying to get you to roll your eyes at him. God, you were cute.

You were distracted, though, your phone buzzing incessantly in your lap. You had been ignoring it until now.

"Fuckboy is an outdated term now, isn't it?" you asked Yunho, locking your phone after turning off the ringer.

"Yeah it totally is, you old hag," he joked, reaching over to squeeze your arm to show he really was only joking. "Why?"

"I hook up with Wooyoung once, drunk, and he keeps trying to hook up again now that he knows I'm coming over today."

Yunho nearly crashed the damn car. His hand jerked involuntarily before he gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles. He lifted his arm from the center console where it had been resting to grab the wheel with both hands. You may be his best friend but he also desperately loved you.

"Didn't know you were that good at sex," he mumbled, going for joking and sounding much more hurt.

You furrowed your brows at his comment. "Why? You asking for a demonstration?" Part of you was joking but the other part seriously meant it. You may have hooked up with Wooyoung but it was purely sex. With Yunho you felt nervous that any move to show that you liked him as more than a friend would harm your friendship. But you swore that he was... jealous. Jealous that you'd slept with Wooyoung.

Yunho's grip had tightened impossibly more on the steering wheel after your comment. "Don't say things you don't mean."

"I meant it. Mean it."

Your monthly cooking was put off. You also found out just how well Yunho could fuck you. Best friend-turned boyfriend Yunho knew exactly which buttons to push to make you moan.

Yeosang: Yeosang was one step away from buying noise cancelling headphones, and if he had to listen to San's bed frame smack against the wall one more time he was going to use San's credit card to buy the headphones. He wasn't expecting the others to be celibate but he was asking for a little respect.

yeo yeo: guess who is fucking again!!!

you: not you based on the fact that you're texting me!!!

yeo yeo: i'm blocking u :)

you: do it :)

yeo yeo: he can't seriously be that good

you: he's okay

Yeosang shot upright in bed as he read your message. There was no way you, his best friend and the light of his life (and his crush but whatever), had had sex with his friend and bandmate AND HADN'T TOLD HIM.

yeo yeo: you're so fake

yeo yeo: when?

you: few months ago

you: we were fwb for a while but it was nothing to write home about so I didn't tell you

Yeosang called you, paying no mind to the slamming on the wall.

"He's got a good rhythm," was all you said when you picked up.

"Y/N..."

"Yeah it was for about and month and that was all it needed to be. I dunno... It was kinda weird because he's your friend and I didn't have any feelings for him. I'm not sure he and I are even friends so it wasn't truly "friends with benefits". And I learned I don't do casual hookups."

"Oh, so not a waste, then," Yeosang teased. He felt mildly ill at the thought of you having sex with San, his stomach clenching uncomfortably. He tried to push the feeling down knowing he had no right to be upset.

"But," oh, God, why was he still talking, "I could do better."

Your heart jumped to your throat. "I'm not sure why you're not at my place right now."

Yeosang was totally better than San ever was. No offense to San...

Mingi: Mingi had watched for a whole year as you pined after Yeosang. It was hard, especially when Mingi was pretty sure he was in love with you. But he was your best friend, and you were his, so he listened to you whine and complain that Yeosang didn't like you back even when Mingi assured you he did. He had also had the duty of getting the two of you together for a first date.

You and Yeosang had gone on a grand total of three dates before the dates stopped and you and Yeosang just hung out at the dorm or with the others. The pining and crushing had seemed to end, but you never told Mingi why. You just said that it hadn't worked out but that you found you liked Yeosang as a friend. Not a best friend, of course. Nobody could replace Mingi.

Mingi never pried, but he wondered. He wondered when he saw Yeosang and you together, as the two of you laughed, and he wondered when he was overly tired and lacking a filter. Which is probably why he finally asked Yeosang.

"We didn't really have romantic feelings. And we weren't sexually compatible."

Sexually compatible... Mingi probably should have left it at that but he'd texted you instead, despite it being three in the morning. It woke you up.

light of my life: you and yeosang hooked up?

you: it's not hooking up if you were dating at the time right?

light of my life: but it didn't work?

you: obviously not

you: why?

light of my life: why didn't it work?

you: idk mingi probably because your name in my phone is light of my life and i thought about you the entire time

you: goodnight

Not even thirty minutes later the doorbell to your apartment rang incessantly. You pulled yourself out of bed and opened the door to find Mingi, eyes slightly drooping with sleep but otherwise alert.

"You're mad at me?"

"It's not how I wanted to confess, Mingi. Yeosang was helping me plan how to confess to you."

"He knew?" Mingi sounded slightly pained at the idea.

"Yes, Mingi. We went on a few dates but the romance wasn't there. We had sex but were on completely different rhythms. He called it before I did. We're lucky he's our friend, Mingi. He deserves so much."

"We'll send him a thank you card, then."

And then he was kissing you, warm lips pressed against yours and tongue swiping at your lips.

"Can I come in?"

San: San knew what made his friends tick. He knew what foods everyone liked, their favorite colors, he had birthdays written down, and he knew their fears. He knew their partners and he knew their crushes. Except yours, he didn't know who exactly you liked but he took you telling him as a good sign for his own chances with you. He may be your best friend but he also hoped to be your boyfriend eventually.

What he didn't know was that you and Jongho had hooked up once. Jongho wasn't planning on telling anyone but when the boys were teasing him about being a virgin (they knew he wasn't) and San joined in (to be a little shit) Jongho couldn't help but tease San back.

"Ask Y/N. Y/N knows for sure I'm not a virgin."

San stopped immediately as the other boys "ooh"-ed and giggled like prepubescent boys. No way. No fucking way. Did you have a crush on Jongho and that's why you didn't tell him.

The thought stuck in the back of his head, but he couldn't figure out when to bring it up. It's hard to casually say "Hey, Y/N is the reason you haven't told me who you like is because you like Jongho and you're afraid I'll tell him and it's not that you secretly like me and want me to be your boyfriend, right?" Best friend or not, it's a little off-putting to say all of that, bordering on deranged.

But it did come up when the two of you were tipsy and watching reality TV. And it wasn't classy at all.

"Why didn't you tell me you hooked up with Jongho," San practically whined as he draped himself across your lap.

You laughed and carded a hand through his hair. "It didn't mean anything."

"It's because you know I like you."

Your hand nearly stilled, your nails scratching his scalp distractedly as you took in what your best friend and the one you loved most said. You hadn't known he liked you before, instead harboring your own romantic feelings for him to yourself.

"Tell me you like me in the morning and we'll go from there," you replied, turning your attention back to the TV.

Exchanging confessions sober was much more exhilarating. So was the sex that came after.

Wooyoung: Wooyoung often cooks while you prep veggies or sit and watch him and catch him up on all the gossip from your workplace. He never has any idea who any of these people are but he's always enthusiastically listening as you describe the ridiculous email someone sent you or the time your boss let everyone go home early because he was hungover and wanted to go home.

It's a weekly tradition. You've only missed it once when you had a date, which he tried not to feel jealous about. He liked you, as more than a friend, and he always felt the cooking nights were dates in their own right. Your date the one time must not have gone well because you never went on a second or, now that he thinks about it, any other date ever.

The thought occurs to him as you recount the horrifying first date details your coworker had shared with you - including a terrible drunk-induced serenade on the sidewalk - when he blurts it out.

"What happened to that guy you went on a date with that one time? What was his name?"

You clicked your tongue and sighed. "Seonghwa."

"Seonghwa. As in the Seonghwa I know and live with?"

"Do you know another Seonghwa?"

Wooyoung shook his head and put aside the spoon he was stirring the broth with. He lowered the temperature on the stovetop and stared at you, wiggling his eyebrows. "Details please."

"You want me to give you details about... sex with Seonghwa?"

"No way he put out on the first date!" Wooyoung shouted as you shushed him laughing.

"He did! I'm just that hot! It was good sex, but it wasn't what either of us wanted."

Wooyoung tried to catch on to your words but he was trying not to imagine you having sex period because then he would think about he and you having sex and then he would probably pop a boner and damn that would border on embarrassing probably.

"Oh my, God," you totally clocked him, "you're thinking about me having sex right now aren't you!"

Wooyoung didn't blush, but maybe he turned a little pink. "What, my best friend's hot..."

"You've already wined and dined me... just ask me out," you said lowly, not at all teasing.

Wooyoung saw it in your eyes, the way they turned soft and slightly hooded.

"Y/N, will you go out with me? As in a romantic date?"

You and Wooyounng were much more compatible.

Jongho: Twenty questions was for losers according to Jongho. Thank god you and Jongho were losers.

It had started out with you jokingly asking him to play, rattling off three questions before Jongho finally jumped in to make you stop asking him what his credit card number was, what the expiration date on his card was, and if he could tell you the CVV on the back. He made sure to tell you you were a loser for playing, but he asked questions back, too. He would do anything for you as your best friend. Oh, and also because he was in love with you.

"What's your date of birth?" he asked, sighing over the phone loudly.

"You going to ask for my social security number next?" you joked. "Come on! Ask good questions. Ask juicy ones."

You could practically hear Jongho rolling his eyes over the phone. "Who was the last person you kissed?"

"Juicy!"

"You're avoiding the question."

"Mingi."

"What! When?" Jongho yelled.

"It's my turn. Who is the last person you kissed?"

"My mother on the cheek. When?"

"When we may or may not have hooked up last month."

"Oh my, God. You told me you were helping film Mingi's dance practice before you came to see me!" Jongho pushed down the jealousy in his chest. "Are you telling me not to touch the couch in the dance practice room now?"

"Yes and also it's my turn. Are you mad?"

"No." The answer was immediate.

"You sound upset."

"I'm not upset."

"You sound it," you replied softly.

"I'm just a little hurt you didn't tell me. You don't have to tell me everything but you're my best friend and he's also my friend."

"That's the only reason?"

Jongho stayed silent for a whole minute. "No. I like you Y/N. You know that."

"I didn't know. I just hoped you did."

"You can't say that over the phone. I'm taking you on a date tomorrow."

Mingi, when he found out you and Jongho were dating, begged Jongho to get him a gift for getting the two of you together. Jongho offered only a foot up his ass.

Respectfully, of course.

[whyanne4]

Memories

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Verstappen! Reader

Part: 1/2

Category: angst

Summary: After months of sneaking around with your brothers biggest rival, Charles, you to end your relationship in order to protect both yourself and him from the medias praying eyes.

Right person, wrong situation. Loosely based on Conan Gray’s song: Memories. and Illicit affairs by Taylor Swift.

Masterlist

“Charles stop, we can't do this anymore.” You said as you felt the brunette slip his arms around your waist and kiss your neck gently. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver down your spine.

“Why not Y/N?” He whined into your neck.

“Charles I’m serious, stop. What if Max finds out?” You asked as you untangle yourself from his embrace.

“I don’t care.” Charles said defiantly, stepping back a bit.

​​"Well, I do. Max is my brother, and if he finds out about us, it'll ruin everything," you declared, stepping away and plopping down on the couch in his driver's room and in your mind all you could think of was all of the time you’d spent with Charles on that very same couch. How he’d kissed you and told you you were the most beautiful girl in the world.

You had met Charles through Max, your older brother and fellow F1 driver. The two of them were fierce rivals on the track. And you knew that if Max ever found out about your secret relationship with Charles, it would not only strain their relationship but also create chaos in the F1 media.

Last season, when you started attending more races and spending time with Max's team, you and Charles had found yourselves drawn to each other. It was effortless, like two pieces of a puzzle fitting perfectly together. You had tried to resist the temptation, knowing the potential consequences, but love has a way of breaking down walls.

The months that followed were filled with stolen glances, secret rendezvous, and stolen kisses. Every moment with Charles felt like a dream, and you knew that what you shared was special and rare. Everything was perfect. He was perfect, he still is but the fear of Max's reaction and the media scrutiny always lurked in the back of your mind. 

You both had agreed to keep your relationship a secret, knowing that the repercussions of being discovered would be severe. But as time passed, it became harder to hide your feelings for each other. The thrill of the forbidden love mixed with the danger of being caught was intoxicating, but you knew it couldn't go on forever.

You know that it would be terrible for Charless image if the media found out. You were 4 years younger than him and you know that the people on twitter would be having a field day if your relationship ever got out.

So you never told anyone. Not Max, not your friends, nobody. Your relationship was a well kept secret. Sneaking out to see him at his apartment in Monaco or in his drivers room. Secret vacations to foreign countries. Hotel rooms under fake names. Think of anything forbidden and the two of you’ve done it. During those months of sneaking around both you and Charles fell hard for one another.

Those months were probably the best months of your life. He was the perfect guy for you and you hope that you were the perfect girl for him. The love you shared was something out of a fairytale and you knew that it was one for the ages. The kind of love only a few lucky ones get to experience during their lifetime.

But the reality of your situation was inescapable. You knew getting involved with him was a bad idea so you’d broken everything off three months ago. You knew it was the right decision. Trying to maintain your secret relationship would only lead to heartbreak and trouble.

Yet, the heart wants what it wants, and when you saw each other again for the first time since the split at this weekend's Grand Prix, he pulled you into his driver’s room like so many times before. You tried to resist, but your connection was too strong to ignore. One thing led to another and suddenly you were being pushed against a wall with his lips on yours before you came to your senses. Which leds to where you are right now:

“Y/N please listen to me.” Charles begged as he followed you and sat down on the couch beside you. You looked into his gorgeous emerald green eyes like you had a million times before.

“Charles, please don’t.” You tried with him but he wouldn’t let you finish.

“No! I don’t want to stop loving you. You are the one for me and I don’t want to spend my life with anyone else.” He confessed wholeheartedly. You felt the tears start to form in your eyes.

"Charles, please, we can't keep doing this," you said, tears forming in your eyes. "I love you, but we're only hurting ourselves by continuing like this. You knew getting into this that it wouldn’t last. However much I want to, we can never be.” You reasoned with him.

“I don’t care. Y/N you are the love of my life. We can make it work. We don’t have to tell anyone if that's what you want. Or we can tell everyone. Whatever you want.” He pleaded with you. “Or if you don’t want that I can quit F1 and we can run away together. We can get a secret house together in the countryside of France and start a family together or something, anything. I would give you everything I have in a heartbeat. Please just don’t give up on this Y/N. Don’t give up on us.” He started crying quietly and so did you. 

“Charles, you know that wouldn’t work. Our families would find out eventually and so would the media. You will be bashed for dating me and your relationship with Max will be ruined.” You pleaded with him.

“I don't care. Y/N, you are the love of my life. We can make it work. We don't have to tell anyone if that's what you want. We can keep it a secret until the time is right,” he pleaded, holding her hand in his.

“Charles, it's not just about the secrecy. It's about our families, Max's feelings, and the media. It's about everything. As much as I love you, I can't put everyone else through that,” she said, her voice filled with sadness.

“So, you think what we had was nothing?” he was rightfully upset, but you didn’t know what else to tell him, he clearly wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“Please, Charles. This is hard enough as it is. Don’t make it harder than it already is okay. I know that one day you’ll find an amazing girl who will steal your heart and whom you will love 10 times more than me.” You put your hand on his cheek and felt his tears hit your thumb.

“That’s not possible, baby. I don’t want anyone else. We can make it work, please, you’re the one for me. I know it. I’ll never love anyone as much as I love you.” Charles pleaded.

“I love you too, Charles, so much.” You confessed to him. Even if you knew it wouldn’t help the situation at all. You felt the need to let him know that the feelings were not one sided. You loved this man with all your heart and if the circumstances were different, if you his rivals younger sister and if he wasn’t an F1 driver with the whole world watching his every move: You would probably get married, have a couple of kids and then grow old together. You would have the whole white picket-fence dream. But instead you were trapped in this situation and all you could do was try to let him go even if it was hard. 

“See, you love me too. Y/N, I promise that things will work out.” He took your hand in his and caressed your palm gently with his thumb. His touch felt so familiar and you just wanted to let all your walls down and let him love you, let yourself love him. But you knew you couldn’t.

“Charles, as much as I want that, it’s just make-believe. It will never work out the way we want to and everyone will be hurt in the end, honey.” You felt the nickname slip from your lips before you could stop it. It was what you called him all throughout your secret rendezvous and the simple word held so much meaning for both of you.

“I know that, baby. I just don’t want to let you go. You’re my favorite person in the whole world. I don’t know how I will ever move on from you.”  He seemed to finally give in and as much as it broke your heart you felt relief that he understood and didn’t argue more with you.

“I know it’s hard, honey. Which is why we can’t keep going back to each other from now on, okay? We can’t find an end to something that we keep beginning over and over again. From now on, I can’t be your friend or your lover, Charles. As much as it kills me inside I can’t hold you back from falling in love with somebody else.” You knew your words were harsh but you really needed to put an end to this here and now.

“I understand.” He put both of his hands on your cheeks and met your gaze. Both of your eyes were red from crying and held so many emotions and so much love for one another. “You’ll always be my person, no matter what happens or who I meet. If you ever change your mind I’ll be there for you with open arms no matter what. You’ll always have a piece of my heart Y/N. Please take care of it.”

“I will, I promise.” You vowed to him, your voice cracking as you tried to speak through your tears. “If things were different..” You tried to explain.

“Shh… Don’t worry about it, baby. You don’t have to explain.” He cut you off. “I’m not mad at you, I could never be mad at you.” 

Silence followed as both of you gazed into each other's eyes, trying to savor your last moments together as a couple before all you had left were the memories of better times.

“Can I kiss you one last time?” He asked quietly as if he was afraid of shattering the moment.

“Yes.” Was all you could say before his lips met yours in one final, heart shattering kiss. Your tears mixed as they ran down both of your cheeks. His hands were still on your cheeks and you felt him pushing your face closer to his. You pulled away for air and he did the same. 

“I’ll always love you, Charles.” You finally broke the silence.

“I’ll always love you too.” He said and you felt his soft hands leave your tear stained cheeks for the last time before he kissed your forehead and let go of you. You exited his driver’s room, heartbroken with only the memories of him left.

[kckt88]

Drowning Inside You

Summary:

The Omega daughter of Rhaenyra Targaryen and Laenor Velaryon is to marry her Alpha uncle Aemond Targaryen.

Valaera might have been glad to be getting married, if it wasn’t for the fact that her future husband was the boy she’d maimed with a blade when she was a child.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

Warning(s): Fear, Kissing, Smut, Oral (F) Receiving, P in V, Knotting.

Word Count: 2562

Author Note: An Alpha/Omega Story.

(Otto Hightower passed away shortly after he was dismissed as Hand of the King, Harwin Strong and his father died in a fire at Harrenhal and Laenor spent the rest of his life rowing to Essos with Qarl).

Inspired by the song Drowning by EMO + Melodia.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the House of The Dragon or Fire & Blood characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used.

Comments, likes, and reblogs are very much appreciated.

Valaera kept her eyes on the floor as she walked the length of the sept. Hoping and praying that perhaps a dragon would crash through the ceiling and end her suffering.

The marriage to her Uncle Aemond was set, another attempt at peace between their family. Valaera might have been glad to be getting married, if the groom wasn’t in fact the uncle she’d maimed with a blade when she was a child.

Valaera took a deep breath and raised her head, catching sight of Aemond standing with the septon, his Targaryen cloak wrapped loosely around his shoulders. His face unreadable as he patiently waited for Valaera.

As Valaera was an unmarried Omega and the heir to Driftmark, it was her duty to marry an Alpha capable of bearing the title consort Lord to Driftmark when the time came. Whilst Aemond was more than capable, Valaera couldn’t help but wonder what her cold uncle had instore for her once the vows had been spoken and the time came for the marriage to be consummated.

Would he be rough? Would he demand an eye? Or would he simply torment Valaera for the entirety of their marriage for what had happened on Driftmark all those years ago?

Even his reaction to the news that they were to be wed wasn’t what Valaera had expected. Aemond merely nodded his head at his father the King’s demand and never uttered a single complaint. Alicent on the other hand was very vocal at her displeasure of her favourite son being married off to the ‘vile beast that had left him without an eye and scarred for life’.

Valaera’s own mother wasn’t so keen either, begging her father countless times to see reason. But Viserys would not be moved. The marriage would happen. As demanded by the King.

Finally, after what seemed like an age Valaera came to a stop beside Aemond and prayed to any god’s that were listening that they would have mercy on her and give her the strength to get through the ceremony without throwing up.

“Let it be known that Prince Aemond of House Targaryen and Princess Valaera of House Velaryon are one heart, one flesh, one soul. In the sight of the Seven, I hereby seal Alpha and Omega together, binding them as one for eternity. Look upon one another and say the words.”

Aemond slowly turned to Valaera, and offered his hand to the Omega, who hesitated for a moment before taking the Alpha’s hand.

“I am hers and she is mine. From this day, until the end of my days," Aemond said, his gaze lingering on Valaera who blushed furiously as the septon bound their joined hand together by ribbon.

“I-I am his and he is mine. From this day, until the end of my days," Valaera said, his heart racing furiously in his chest.

“With this kiss, I pledge my love”.

Valaera froze as Aemond leaned down and placed a surprisingly gentle kiss upon her lips.

"Ao se nyke. Issi va ñellyrty perzys. Se nyke jāhor va moriot gūrogon ziry iksos ñuhon” whispered Aemond (You and I. Are fire made flesh. And I will always take what is mine).

All throughout the feast, Valaera couldn’t get Aemond’s words out of her mind.

He’s going to carve out my eye. That’s it. I’m done for!

“You seem tense. Wife”.

Valaera jumped slightly at the sound of Aemond’s raspy voice.

“I-I’m just nervous” Valaera replied quickly.

“About what?” asked Aemond as he lifted his goblet to his lips and took a slow sip of wine.

“T-The bedding. I-I’ve never…” said Valaera quietly.

“So, you’ve never taken your brother’s knot?” asked Aemond curiously.

“J-Jace? I would never. He’s my brother” exclaimed Valaera wrinkling her nose in disgust.

“Like that’s ever stopped anyone in this family”.

“I come to the marriage bed untouched uncle. Can you say the same?” asked Valaera.

“Would it matter if I didn’t? I’m an Alpha and Prince of the realm no one would care if I busied myself on the streets of silk every night”.

“So, your just like Aegon then?” asked Valaera, her shoulders slumping slightly.

“I’m nothing like my wastrel of a brother. If it would please my Omega to know that I have only had one such experience” snapped Aemond.

“You expect me to believe that. I mean look at you” said Valaera.

“What about me?” snarled Aemond, his fingers clutching at his goblet so tight they had turned white.

“Y-Your b-beautiful” whispered Valaera.

“Is that so? Even with the deformity that you so charitably bestowed upon me when I was naught but a child?”

“Y-Yes” muttered Valaera.

“Hm”

“Do you plan to hurt me uncle?” asked Valaera nervously.

“I would not hurt you. Unless you asked me too” Aemond whispered as he leaned closer, his wine scented breath tickling Valaera’s ear.

“B-But I took your eye.”

“Yes. You did. But I gained a dragon and there’s other blood that can be spilled in payment for what you took from me” said Aemond.

Oh!

This was it. The way she was going to die. Death by dicking.

Her uncle stood sharply and offered his hand to Valaera.

It was now time to consummate the marriage. Her mother of course had given her the talk just last night. She knew of sex and how children were created, but to hear her mother talking of slick and knots made Valaera want to be sick in the closest vase.

Nothing would ever prepare her for being locked together with her one-eyed uncle until his knot went away.

Valaera jumped as Aemond squeezed her hand. Ignoring the jeers from a clearly drunk Aegon who was soon reprimanded by his own Alpha husband. Aemond led Valaera out of the throne room and towards his-their chambers.

The door suddenly seemed so loud as it was closed.

I suppose I could always jump out of the window and break my legs in the process. It would hurt like hell, but it would be worth it…Right?

Valaera shook life a leaf as Aemond stood before her and slowly began removing her wedding clothes.

“Do you fear me?” Aemond whispered.

“Yes Valzȳrys” Valaera said as she quickly stepped out of the dress that Aemond had unlaced (Husband).

“Issa dōna omega (my sweet omega)”

“Alpha” gasped Valaera as Aemond leaned forward and pressed his face into her neck and nuzzled her mating gland.

It wasn’t…It shouldn’t…Why did that feel…good?

Valaera stood silent, as she suddenly felt herself growing hot. That little voice inside her head whispering. Encouraging her to get closer to the Alpha.

“īlon emagon va moriot issare bound naejot each toile” said Aemond he stepped back and began pulling at his own clothing (We have always been bound to each other).

My mother never said anything about…No…Stop…I shouldn’t even be…Not whilst Aemond is…Oh…It feels so good.

Valaera had lost most of her senses the moment Aemond had pressed her onto the bed and knelt down between her open legs.

“Issa dōna omega” whispered Aemond (My sweet omega).

Valaera’s eyes rolled into the back of her head as Aemond’s tongue swept across her slick wet folds.

It was difficult to believe. Aemond Targaryen rider of the mighty Vhagar was on his knees as naked as his name day, tongue deep in her…Oh my god.

Valaera bit the back of her hand to keep herself from screaming as Aemond began using his long fingers to tease her entrance.

“Ivestragī issa rȳbagon ao issa dōna” growled Aemond (Let me hear you my sweet).

“A-Aemond. Oh god. Please” moaned Valaera.

Her heart was racing, it felt so good. Yes. Yes Aemond. Please. Something is happening. I feel like I’m going to explode.

Aemond pressed two fingers inside Valaera, moving them against a spot that made her entire body shake.

His tongue…His fingers…Oh it was heaven. Don’t stop. I beg you don’t stop.

“I know your almost there. Let it happen my sweet. Come for me” whispered Aemond.

Valaera arched her back and let out a scream as her pleasure erupted.

Aemond crawled up Valaera’s body, placing gentle kisses on her skin as he moved higher and higher.

Valaera blushed furiously when she saw that Aemond’s chin was shining with her slick.

“Calm yourself my little strong girl” murmured Aemond.

“I-I’ve never-” mumbled Valaera.

“Relax and let Alpha take care of you”.

Easy for him to say…He’s not the one who…Oh my…He’s huge…Surely that won’t fit inside will it?

Almost as if he could read Valaera’s mind, Aemond smiled and began peppering gentle kisses all over Valaera’s face.

“You can take it. Ao istan vēttan syt issa” whispered Aemond as he began rubbing his hard cock along Valaera’s wet folds (You were made for me).

I want him. I want him so much. Take me alpha. Please.

Suddenly Aemond rolls his hips forward and the entire hard length of him is buried inside Valaera.

“A-Aemond” shrieks Valaera.

Aemond stills for a moment, almost as if he is savouring the feeling of Valaera’s tight wet heat being wrapped around him.

He’s so deep inside me. I can feel him everywhere. It hurts. It hurts so good.

“M-Move please Alpha. I need you” begged Valaera desperately.

Aemond rolls his hips gently at first, allowing Valaera the time to adjust to the feeling of his cock moving back and forth inside her, but when his sweet Omega begins issuing pleas of “Harder and faster” Aemond loses it and begins fucking Valaera into the mattress.

Their hips pound together as Aemond thrusts hard and fast, his movements brutal and precise.

“Valaera. My Omega” moans Aemond as his cock begins to thicken at the base.

Yes. Yes. Oh, it’s feels so good. Alpha don’t stop. Fuck me harder. I can take it.

“Going to fill you up with my seed. I want to see you swollen with my pups” hisses Aemond.

Yes. Alpha breed me. I want to grow round with your pup. I will give you as many pups as you desire.

“Y-Your neck. I need too…Claim you” growls Aemond.

“Yes, Alpha claim me. Make me yours. Forever” begs Valaera as she quickly turns her head to the side.

“I've always wanted your sweet cunny” moans Aemond as his knot begins to tug against Valaera with every thrust.

As Aemond gives one last thrust and forces his knot inside Valaera, he leans forward and sinks his teeth into Valaera’s mating gland.

Valaera screams in ecstasy as she feels Aemond throb inside of her, coating her insides with rope after rope of his seed.

Aemond suddenly moves his head to the side to display his own neck and Valaera lunges forward. Whilst her teeth are not as sharp as Aemonds, they still manage to puncture his mating gland. Sealing Alpha and Omega together forever. Their bond snapping into place. Their hearts as one.

I can feel him. My Alpha. My mate. My dragon.

“My Valaera. Always” mutters Aemond.

Valaera was married, she was mated, she had an Alpha, and she was completely exhausted.

Her Alpha had a ravenous appetite last night, kissing, sucking, licking, and fucking her well into the hours of the night. Never fully satisfied until he’d filled her with his seed another two times.

Aemond was absolutely insatiable, even just this morning he had reached for Valaera and had her once more.

Afterwards, Aemond had wrapped his arms around Valaera and held her close as the pleased purrs rumbled through her chest.

The feeling of Aemond inside her, the sound of her Alpha’s moans as he spilled his seed. Oh, gods the way Aemond had kissed her. No stop, I can’t be thinking of him-us like that not now, not when I ache so much.

B-But it was so good.

Valaera was aching and she was sore in places she never knew existed.

Even sitting at the table to eat breakfast was rather uncomfortable.

Aemond had given Valaera a quick kiss before leaving their shared chambers after breakfast, his training with Ser Crisp-Criston still of importance.

How her Alpha even had the energy for training this morning, Valaera would never know.

Must be an Alpha thing, enhanced virility, or stamina or whatever it was.

At least having some time alone, meant Valaera could bathe.

The maids of course had swiftly changed the blood and seed stained sheets and prepared a bath for the satisfied yet thoroughly debauched looking Omega.

Her skin was littered with numerous love bites, yet she was sure that her Alpha also wore the marks of their vigorous love making in the form of long scratches on his back, which of course Aemond seemed to enjoy receiving.

Valaera sighed as she lowered herself into the lavender scented hot water.

The warmth soothing the dull throbbing ache between her legs.

After Valaera had successfully scrubbed the dried blood and seed from her body, she rested her head on the edge of the tub and closed her eyes.

Again, her mind was drawn to her Alpha, just yesterday morning she’d been a nervous wreck, the very thought of bedding Aemond was terrifying, yet now the very though of her Alpha’s huge…

“Valaera”

Valaera jumped at the sound of her older brother’s voice.

“Jace, seriously. Do you even know how to knock” snapped Valaera as she covered her body.

“I did knock. You didn’t answer” replied Jace.

“So, you just thought you would barge into my rooms, it's a good job Aemond isn't here”.

“Mother was worried. So, I said I’d check on you” Jace retorted as averted his gaze and began looking around the room.

“As you can see, I’m still alive” grumbled Valaera as she quickly rose from the bath and wrapped a towel around her body.

“How was it? I mean for us Alpha’s it’s easy but an Omega-“

“I’m fine Jace. Aemond was nice, he took care of me” mumbled Valaera.

“He more than took care of you judging by those love marks on your neck” sniggered Jace.

“Don’t you have your own Omega to annoy” growled Valaera as she ducked behind the privacy screen and began pulling on her riding clothes.

“Boy somebodies grumpy today”

“I didn’t get much sleep last night that’s all” muttered Valaera.

“How many times did you guys-“ laughed Jace wiggling his eyebrows.

“Three times and then again this morning” confessed Valaera blushing.

“There was me worrying that he’d carve out your eye the moment he had you alone and instead he was too busy fucking you into the mattress” exclaimed Jace as he wrapped an arm around Valaera and hugged her.

“You weren’t the only one that though he would take my eye, but Jace he was-it was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before” whispered Valaera.

Her mind yet again wondering to her Alpha and his perfectly sculpted body, his long silver hair, and that handsome face. Her husband was truly a gift from the god’s of old Valyria.

“Right before you start slicking yourself at the thought of your Alpha, how about we go flying? Your already dressed for it anyway and I’m sure Vermax would enjoy the company” said Jace smirking at his younger sister’s blushing.

“Fine, but only if we can race” urged Valaera excitedly.

“Sure we-Hey you cheater” shouted Jace as Valaera darted past him and ran out of the room, her laughter echoing down the corridor.

Jace gave an annoyed huff before he gave in and chased after his sister.

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

a big german newspaper (die zeit) recently published a more critical article on the so called „verrichtungsboxen“ (literally: boxes of execution; boxes on the street where prostituted women and sex buyers can go to consummate the sexual acts; anyone who knows german will know this is a gross terminology, fitting for a gross concept).

while the fact these boxes exist is in itself a tragedy, the letters to the editor are giving me hope that there are sane people left in this country - even though from their names and writing style i would guess they are of the older generation, pension age.

heinz wohner: „if you dont get a visceral reaction of disgust and shame looking at these obfuscating boxes called ‚eco toilets‘ and the image of what is going on in them, you have to be extremely cold. calling what is being done to these women for little money ‚work like any other‘ is sugarcoating the issue.“

wolfgang wendling: „maybe there are women who voluntarily prostitute themselves, but the majority is doing it out of necessity and under pressure. calling the oldest trade in history a profession like any other is pure mockery. its not an honor to call our country europe‘s biggest brothel. but it‘s true. we should be ashamed that women are being exploited, humiliated and abused before our eyes. the more severe the poverty is in the country of origin, the cheaper you can have them. we should finally stop this, which is the only appropriate action for a civilised country.“

brigitte kosfeld: „the photo of these boxes alone speaks volumes on the inhumane practices hidden behind the liberalisation of prostitution. when the law was introduced, there were convinced social democratic women who were holding speeches on ‚prostitution as a profession‘. the intentions behind the law might have been honorable, but the reality has always been deeply anti-woman.“

professor claudia reuter, phd: „the liberalisation of prostitution in germany has failed in all regards. according to a french study, the average life expectancy of a prostitute is 33 years. babbling about self-determination in this case is inhumane. the state is not supporting prostitutes’ workers rights and their health, but their economic and sexual exploitation. its about time for the swedish model: protection for women and consistent punishment for sex buyers and pimps.“

joachim kasten: „social democrat august bebel already wrote in 1879 (…) that ‚honorable family men‘ were contributing to uphold the system prostitution with their money. according to him, they were generously let off their responsibility to disappear in anonymity. apparently today we are still where we were at the end of the 19th century.“

sabine moehler: „the description [in the article] of typical injuries prostitutes have reminded me very much of those women in physically abusive relationships show as well. a man who abuses, humiliates and demeans a prostitute in any way will do the same to his partner, wife or lover as soon as he doesnt like her behavior. (…) even reading about this is upsetting me a lot.“

and of course the one sex buyer who just had to write to the editors, peter müller: „its one sided to use the misery in berlin street prostitution with sex on public toilets as a reason to debate the liberalisation of prostitution. there are many brothels were the ladies are treated with respect. of course working as a prostitute harbors certain risks - but there are women who freely choose this job, and in my experience, some of them are doing it with passion and love. the regular prices are not the dumping prices you mentioned (5-10 euros) [note: which is indeed normal in street prostitution] but actually 80-100 euros for half an hour - not to mention those dont include extras and humiliating sex practices. i met women who earn better in prostitution than some employees in germany.“

loose translation and highlights by me.

[pikatrainer99]

Kieran is autistic and you can't change my mind!

Okay, I KNOW that I'm not the only one who holds this headcanon...but I wanted to do an analysis on Kieran anyway, especially since my best friend @sinnohanvulpix said she'd love to see me do one. Credit to her for all the screenshots used btw. The GIFs on the other hand were either found on Google Images or created by me using gifrun.com and these YouTube videos:

I did not use my own footage for this at all...as proof here's what MY character in the game looks like...he has my real name but I tried to make him look like Orange which is why he has the orange eyes 😅

(Sorry for the bad quality btw...taking pictures of my Switch screen is hard 😅)

Okay, now without further ado, let's get started with the analysis!

First, Kieran has a CLEAR special interest in Ogerpon, he admires and looks up to her, he was obsessed with the story of the ogre, he was always trying to go to her den and meet her, he has a meltdown when Ogerpon chooses the player over him, etc. Carmine even says that Kieran "really really REALLY likes the ogre" and that made me think, "Ah! Special interest!"

And then at the end of the Teal Mask he gains a new special interest in getting stronger to beat the player...and he hyperfocuses HARD on that...to the point of it being detrimental to both his physical and mental health, as he was doing nothing but training during that time...he barely ate, barely slept, just trained...and that is not healthy. It's a rare example of media showcasing a special interest being unhealthy and absolutely CONSUMING one's life, and the consequences do actually show for it.

Kieran is very introverted and doesn't know how to make friends very well. I actually think the player is his first friend considering his surprised reaction when the player says they consider him a friend, and following this, he quickly becomes a bit...too attached to the player, as he doesn't quite understand how friendships work.

(This is also such a neurodivergent way to say "I'm so happy I finally have a friend")

He also struggles socially, as is a requirement for autistic people to qualify for a diagnosis. Kieran specifically has a hard time reading social cues, he struggles with making eye contact, he has clear anxiety when talking to people as proven by his little stutter he has at times.

(This is an adorable screenshot 🥺)

He also struggles with social and emotional processing (and might have alexithymia as well due to his sudden huge outbursts of emotion), and he also struggles with initiating conversation as well, as seen when he tries to talk to Penny at the League Club. They both have no idea how to even start a conversation with each other and it's honestly pretty adorable seeing the two quiet adorkable kids trying their best to hold conversation. I get it, you two, initiating conversation is really difficult for me too.

Also the way they try to start the conversation by talking about the weather...that's really funny and ironic to me because that's what NTs do all the time. NTs always use the weather as a small-talk conversation starter but NDs like me (and Kieran and Penny too apparently) just don't get that stuff.

(These two are so neurodivergent it's great and I love them both 🥺)

Kieran also has four in-game animations that I personally see as stimming. The first one is him tapping his fist against his hip when he's thinking or nervous.

(Focus your attention to his hand here and you'll see it.)

The second one is him playing with a strand of loose hair, usually when he's nervous.

(The little nervous side glance at the player is relatable and adorable 🥺)

The third one is a more agitated stim that he only does ONCE in the entire game...and that is tapping the front of his foot on the ground. I do that myself when I'm agitated or impatient, somehow it's comforting, especially since for some reason I really like the way my shoes sound when I tap them on the ground... especially since I got my brand new Infernape-themed shoes, they sound extra satisfying because they're brand new.

(This is not the way most people tap their foot...I've never seen an NT do it like this...only other NDs such as myself and one of my brothers)

The fourth and final one is, unfortunately, a stress stim...Kieran runs his hands very fast through his hair and it also looks like, to me anyway as someone who has self-injurious stims myself, that he is digging his nails into his scalp as well while doing that. I do something similar myself, though on top of running my hands through my hair and digging my nails into my scalp, I also pull at my hair...yeah... self-injurious stims are no joke...and I'm kinda glad Kieran's autism coding brings attention to that aspect of autism...at least in my eyes as someone who does those things myself.

(He's in so much stress here, poor kid 😔)

Another aspect of autism that I'm surprised and kinda glad that Kieran exhibits as an autistic-coded character is meltdowns and shutdowns. Kieran has actual meltdowns in the game! This is something we have never seen in such an in-your-face way in any Pokémon game, and as someone who regularly has meltdowns myself, it hit me in the feels whenever I saw him having them. His first meltdown is in the Teal Mask when he steals the Teal Mask and runs off to Loyalty Plaza where he battles the player. He yells at Carmine and the player for treating him like an outcast...which is unfortunately something that happens to a lot of autistic people, myself included. Kieran screams at the player and Carmine for for lying to him while doing his stress stim, before running up to the Lousy Three's shrine and punching it, without any regard for his safety, which is also something autistic people may do during meltdowns...I know I have no regard for my safety during mine. After that's all over he gives the mask back to the player and goes home, leaving the player to talk to Carmine alone, who says that she's worried and thinks it's just "teen angst". When I saw that I was like, "...Uh, Carmine...I don't think it's just that, I think your brother is neurodivergent and really needs a lot of help and support because he's struggling a lot right now..."

His second meltdown is also in the Teal Mask, when he wants Ogerpon to go with him but Ogerpon wants to go with the player...Kieran can't process that and doesn't understand how to take Ogerpon's feelings into account, instead demanding the player to battle him for the right to be Ogerpon's partner. He collapses on all fours after being defeated again, and it gets worse...he looks like he's crying while the player battles Ogerpon in order to catch her. After the player catches her, Kieran wonders why he can't be like the player, and runs off crying, locking himself in his room for the rest of the story. The end of the Teal Mask has him doing his stress stim while being consumed by a new special interest in a very detrimental way...that interest being becoming so strong that no one can defeat him...including the player.

Kieran's third meltdown is in the Indigo Disk, after the player defeats him in the championship match. That meltdown is a full-on cutscene, where it is CLEAR to see his spiraling mental state through the visuals, and he holds his hands on his head like he has a headache while trying to process the fact that he lost to the player AGAIN (which is also relatable as someone who struggles with processing difficulties myself...it really does give headaches and it is one of the worst feelings when I just can't process what's going on around me or the emotions I feel or anything really)...he collapses to his knees and looks like he's breathing very hard as he is so upset and distressed at this loss. It is definitely one of the most heartbreaking scenes for me because this is a CLEAR CUT MELTDOWN in my eyes and it hits me in the feels like a TRUCK to watch that cutscene.

Also, in the Terapagos fight, Kieran has a bit of a shutdown for a bit, standing there frozen, thinking he's useless and can't do anything right (which is relatable as I have regular shutdowns as well, and I also constantly feel like I'm a failure of a human being who can't do anything right)...but let me tell you, when the player finally gets him to snap out of it and convinces him to help and he opens his eyes revealing that the light is back in his eyes as well as visible tears...I cheered (and teared up myself). My boy was back, and I was so happy.

(When I first saw the tears I was like, "NOOOO don't cry Kieran! 😢)

Also in the Indigo Disk, Kieran seems completely different and "no longer like his usual self". His autistic traits are (mostly) nowhere to be seen as he becomes much more serious, angry, assertive,and aggressive. I personally see this as a persona he puts on by masking, which is common for autistic people to do. I myself can't mask, but Kieran definitely seems to be masking here by putting on this persona in order to get stronger and seem stronger as a person as well. This is NOT his real self, this is a FACADE!

We see him start to drop the mask again in Area Zero when he says it seems like they're in a spy movie or something and how cool that is, but once the crack in his mask is pointed out he immediately puts it back on.

After everything in the under depths ends, and you go back to Blueberry Academy, he drops the mask again completely, and goes back to his real, adorkable, relatable self...and stays that way from then on, which made me so relieved and happy.

(This is my favorite cutscene in the entire DLC because of how adorable it is and also how neurodivergent Kieran is being here while apologizing for all he did 🥺)

In conclusion, I think Kieran is a great example of an autistic-coded character who has many relatable traits, and also does a good job showcasing some of the more "unpleasant and challenging behaviors and traits" (NTs use that terminology a lot, not me... that's how NTs unfortunately view NDs a lot of the time) of autism. I used to be afraid of him during the post-Teal Mask pre-Indigo Disk era but that was my trauma and PTSD talking (I talked about the emotional rollercoaster Kieran's story arc took me on in another post from last year after I finally worked up the courage to play the Indigo Disk...feel free to check that out too if you'd like). Now though I can wholeheartedly say that I love and appreciate Kieran a lot as a character, and his relatability is definitely a big part of why he is a big comfort character for me now (please Pokémon put him in Pokémon Masters EX, PLEASE I will literally cry from joy if he gets added to the game)!

Hope you all enjoyed this autistic person's analysis of yet ANOTHER autistic-coded character in Pokémon! I know I had A LOT to say but that just proves how relatable Kieran is, and I love him for that. Let me know what you think and if I missed anything in the comments below!

[strawbxrryhwa]

"I like you." - park seonghwa.

pairing - park seonghwa x fembodied!reader

genre/warnings - smut! mdni. toxic!seonghwa, dom!seonghwa, sub!reader, fingering, unprotected sex (pls don’t), slight choking (he literally only loosely wraps his hand around readers throat), let me know if i missed anything!

word count - 4.5k

authors note - hii everyone! this is officially my first post on here, so i’m most definitely super nervous.. but i hope you enjoy!!

A knock could be heard echoing through Seonghwas house; bouncing across the walls. Outside of the door you stood, anxiously waiting, nerves running through your body. You fiddled with the strap on your bag, trying to distract your mind and keep your thoughts collected.

Seonghwa had invited you to another one of those horrible parties he kept attending; or more accurately threatend you to go. Parties weren’t really your thing. It wasn’t like you didn’t like them, you enjoyed parties. You just didn’t enjoy seeing Seonghwa make out with every other girl there. You would have rather stayed at home; reading books in the comfort of your bed. Not getting your heart broken while you're out to have a good time. 

Seonghwa was known to be a bit of a fuckboy. Sleeping around with whoever he could seduce; and sadly, you had fallen for his charm. You had been friends with him for as long as you could remember. Both his and your mom had been childhood friends, so it just kind of happened that you both ended up as friends. Your crush on him had developed pretty early on. But you were scared to ruin the friendship you had; so you just kept quiet. 

Your thoughts were interrupted by the door flying open in front of you. You looked up to see Seonghwa greeting you with a smile, stepping to the side and motioning for you to come inside. You smiled stepping inside, letting your bag slip down to the floor. Seonghwa closed the door behind you as you bent down to untie your shoes; not noticing the way Seonghwa lingered by the door, eyes stuck on you. 

You put your shoes away on the shoe rack to not anger the clean freak; grabbing your bag and standing back up, turning to him with a smile.  “I thought you’d be late,” Seonghwa taunted with a cheeky grin, moving away from the door to walk towards his bedroom. You rolled your eyes at him, even though he had his back turned to you. 

“I’m not always late,” You said, annoyance dripping in your words. Sure, you had a small habit of being late sometimes. But it definitely wasn’t as bad as Seonghwa made it out to be. “Yeah, sure.” He scoffed. 

Walking into his room was just the same as always. His bed perfectly made, not a speck of dust in sight and the pleasant mild scent of lavender filling your nose. You inhaled deeply, enjoying the familiar scent. A small smile spread over your lips.

You shot a glance at his bed, smile dropping, before looking over at his desk, already knowing where you’d choose to sit. You sat down, your bag once again hitting the floor. You let out an overdramatic annoyed sigh while slumping back in the chair, glancing over at Seonghwa to see his reaction. He looked over at you, eyebrows raised with a confused expression on his face. 

“What’s up?” He asked, turning back around to his closet; going back to his search for an outfit. “Do we really have to go?” You groaned while throwing your head back. Seonghwa felt himself twitch. He turned back to look at you, thousands of sinful images running through his head seeing you in the position you were in. 

“Come on, don’t be such a bore,” He walked over to you, his head hovering over yours. You looked up at him rolling your eyes, moving back up so you were sitting normally. Seonghwa spun the chair in his direction; his hands resting on the armrests. He leaned over you slightly, eyes staring into yours. “You’d just stay at home reading one of those boring books of yours.” He said, a small smirk spread across his lips. You felt your cheeks go hot. You crossed your arms and quickly turned away from him.

“I would’ve preferred that actually.” 

Seonghwa chuckled before pushing himself off the chair. Your head snapped back to him, watching him walk back to his wardrobe; your eyes scanning his body. 

You broke your eyes away from him, looking around his room; eyes shooting towards his bed. Your head began swarming. Seonghwa had told you about the multiple times he’s had girls over. It was painful to listen to; but you were so close, so it wasn’t weird. Right? He was your best friend, telling you those things in details couldnt be weird, right? “You know what,” You began as you stood up, grabbing your bag and throwing it over your shoulder. “I’ll sleep in the guestroom tonight.” 

“Why? We always share a bed,” Seonghwa answered, currently buttoning up the shirt he had decided to wear. “There is no way you’re sleeping in the guestroom.” He continued, head turning to look at you as you moved closer to the door of his bedroom. You shrugged. “I’d rather get settled in there right away, rather than being kicked out when you bring a girl home.” You joked, hand grabbing the handle of the door. 

He raised an eyebrow, tucking the front of his shirt into his pants before walking towards you. “I won’t bring home a girl if you’re here, stupid,” He reached for your bag and took it from you, his other hand reaching for yours. He dragged you towards his bed, letting your bag fall to the floor before sitting you down. “You’re sleeping in here with me, that’s final.” 

Your heart skipped a beat, air trapped in your lungs as you looked up towards Seonghwa towering over you. You swallowed before gathering enough courage to speak. “Yeah, whatever.” Was all you managed to mumble out, face turning away from him.

“Good girl.”

He smiled, petting your head before turning away from you; getting back to finish getting ready. 

-

The cab ride there felt like torture. Your heart felt like it was about to jump out your throat. Your nerves almost completely taking over. You were fiddling with your hands in your lap, staring out the window; when you felt a hand on your bare thigh. You looked down and followed the hand up to see Seonghwa looking back at you.

“You good?” He asked, voice dripping in concern. You smiled and nodded, doing your best to cover it up. He slowly nodded, keeping his eyes on you. You turned back to look out the window; praying the car ride would be over soon. Hyper-aware of his hand on your thigh. You shifted in your seat, nerves growing the longer his hand was kept on your thigh. Seonghwa smirked seeing you shift under his touch: his pointer finger slowly started moving in a circular motion, smirk growing bigger as he saw you shiver. 

He had always enjoyed teasing you. Knowing full well the control he had over you. It was like he knew you liked him, but wouldn’t dare do anything about it. 

You kept your gaze glued to the window, head foggy as you felt his hand move the slightest bit further up your leg. But before he could do anything else the cab driver announced your arrival.

You let out a sigh of relief as you felt Seonghwas hand leave your thigh. You both got out of the car and Seonghwa walked up to you throwing his arm over your shoulders. 

 “Let’s go!” 

Hearing the loud music booming out of the house made you cringe. Regret flowing through you like crazy; and stepping inside the house only made it worse. The music already making your head ache. You both wandered further into the house; finding your way to the livingroom to find the rest of your friends. You noticed Mingi fairly quickly, nudging Seonghwa to point in their direction. 

When getting closer to the rest of the guys you shrugged off Seonghwas arm from your shoulders; wrapping your arms around Mingi in a hug, greeting him. You broke free from him and turned to greet the rest of the boys; your nerves slowly disappearing. 

-

Time seemed like it just flew by as you all sat together. All your worries had completely weared off; and for once you were actually having a lot of fun at a party like this. You were currently laughing like crazy over a horrible joke Mingi had thrown out, your hand found its way to his arm; playfully slapping it. Seonghwa took notice and couldn’t help but glare at the interaction; before his eyes scanned the room.

His eyes landed upon a girl dancing in the middle of the room, a small smirk spreading across his face. He stood up, excusing himself from the group before making his way over with two things in mind; sex and revenge. Seeing what direction he was going in made it click, you knew exactly what he was about to do. I won’t bring home a girl if you’re here, stupid. Yeah, right. Your mood immediately switched, feeling like you just shrunk in size; wishing you could just vanish into the couch you were sitting on. 

Mingi quickly noticed the shift in your body language, eyes following the direction you were looking only to see Seonghwa make out with some girl in the middle of the room. Mingi felt his jaw clench; if only looks could kill. Mingi knew about your crush, being the only person you had opened up to about it. He had kind of picked up on it by himself and eventually asked you about it, his suspicions getting confirmed. He had been there for you whenever it got too overwhelming, being the second closest person to you after Seonghwa. 

Mingi teared his eyes away from his friend, looking back at you; face softening. “You wanna go outside for a bit?” He yelled over the music, nudging you. Your eyes shot up to him, answering with a nod. You both got up and Mingi grabbed hold of your hand, leading you outside. Seonghwa noticed, lips breaking away from the girl in front of him to watch you leave. 

-

You took a deep breath as soon as you stepped outside the door; the cool air hitting your skin. You both headed over to a nearby bench and sat down. You sighed, head dropping down as you let out a laugh. Mingis head turned to look at you, eyebrows raised in confusion and shock at the sudden action.

“It’s ridiculous,” You began, throwing your head back and looking up at the star-filled sky. “It’s been years at this point.” You trailed off; not being too sure where you wanted to go with what you were saying. Mingi kept quiet and wrapped you into a hug, resting your head on his chest. You both sat like that for a while; you couldn’t even cry. How could you even? It had been going on for years; but still you just couldn’t seem to get rid of the feelings you had; and it was not like Seonghwa made it any easier for you. 

Mingi gently patted your head with his hand, the other one gently rubbing up and down your back. You sighed, eyes tightly closing before breaking free from his grasp. You opened your eyes again and gave him a small smile.

“I think I’ll just go home early.” You sighed, looking back towards the house. “Could you tell the others I just got too tired or something?” You asked, looking back at him. 

“You sure?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you. Mingi knew you too well, he didn’t want to let you go; knowing you’d overthink and that you shouldn’t be left alone. But he couldn’t really stop you either.

“I’m sure,” You started. You stood back up, looking down at the man in front of you. “I want to get back home before him, so I can sneak into the guestroom.” You tried to joke, a dry laugh leaving your throat. Mingi didn’t really find your horrible joke funny, but still chuckled as he stood up. 

“I’ll call you a cab.” He said, fishing his phone out of his pocket. Shooting a smile your way.

-

A pleasant sigh escaped your lips as you snuggled down into the bed in the guestroom. You had managed to remove your makeup and change into your pajamas, which ironically happened to be one of Seonghwas shirts. 

I won’t bring home a girl if you’re here, stupid. 

His words kept repeating in your head, almost taunting you. Why did you agree? You had always declined Seonghwas invitation to parties, no matter how much he tried or begged you always declined; so why didn't you do it this time? Why? What was so different?

More questions swarmed your head as you felt tears well up in your eyes, allowing them to fall. All you wanted was to turn back time, to go back and decline his invitation. Maybe even travel back further in time to slap yourself for allowing this crush to appear in the first place. 

Your thoughts got interrupted by the sound of the front door opening; making you freeze, holding your breath as you heard the house fill up with laughter. 

Seonghwa and the same girl he met from the party stumbled into the house. Seonghwas hands explored the girl's body, lips kissing down her neck. Moanes escaped the girls throat, her hands finding their way into Seonghwas hair, slightly pulling on it. He groaned from the feeling, leading her further into the house as they kept their hands on each other. 

You could hear it all, as well as their footsteps going further into the house. You turned your back towards the door, tightly closing your eyes praying for sleep to just take over so you could escape the sounds. You heard them pass Seonghwas room, confusion filling you. Their footsteps were getting closer to your door; and suddenly it swung open. All the noise abruptly stopped. 

The silence was killing you, it felt like they stood there for an eternity before you could hear them move away from the door. You let out a quiet sigh of relief, letting your body relax. But it didn’t last for long; you could already hear the moans coming from his room. His groans making your face heat up. But tears yet again spilling from your eyes as you realized what he was actually doing. It didn’t take too long for you to fall asleep though, the party, tears and just everything had you completely exhausted. 

-

Waking up was the last thing you wanted to do, you didn’t even bother opening your eyes before trying to fall back into sleep. Feeling heavy you let out a groan as you tried to shift in bed, only to realize you had a pair of arms wrapped around you. 

You froze from the realization, opening your eyes only to be met by Seonghwas bare chest. Your breath got caught in your throat from the shock, mind going blank as you laid there. You tried to carefully turn your body to the other side to get out of his grip and leave; but you only made it to your back before you felt yourself getting pulled closer to Seonghwa. 

“Good morning.” He mumbled, his voice raspy from just waking up making your stomach flip. All you managed to let out was a quiet ‘hm’ as a response, once again moving to get out of his grip. He groaned from your action, once again pulling you closer; if that was even possible. Your head was pushed up against his chest again and you held in a breath. 

“What are you doing?” He started, slightly lifting his head to look down at your face that laid pressed against him. “Just go back to sleep.” He finished, head falling back into his pillow, slightly squeezing you. You sighed. There was no way you were going back to sleep now, being wide awake. What is he doing in here? You moved your head to look around the room, only for the realization to hit that you were in fact not in the guestroom. 

You pushed away from him, finally escaping his hold on you. You rolled over to get out of bed but felt his hands sneak around your waist yet again. He pulled you back up against him, his head snuggling into your neck. 

“Let go, Seonghwa.” He felt his body freeze, knowing you were mad at him. You never addressed him by his full name, just only whenever you were genuinely pissed at him. A small smirk spread across his lips as he let himself relax, pushing his head closer into your neck, giving it a small peck just to tease you. His smirk only grew bigger as he felt your body go stiff. 

“I changed the sheets already.” 

His statement caught you off guard. So what? As if that was enough to actually make you want to stay in bed with him. 

You both laid there quietly for a while. Thoughts running through your mind; but they quickly got interrupted as you felt Seonghwas lips press against your neck once again. One of his hands slowly caressing the side of your body. Shivers ran through your body from his touch, you felt your body heat up; thighs pressing together. 

He shifted behind you, his hand slowly moving closer to your boobs. He nibbled on your ear as you felt his hand pinch your nipple through your shirt. You squirmed in his arms, back slightly arching and your ass pressed up against him; feeling the bulge growing in his pants. You let out a whimper as you felt him kiss down the side of your neck, slightly nibbling and sucking on the skin.

“I’ve been waiting for this for so long,” He mumbled into your skin, groaning as he felt you brush up against him. Suddenly he was hovering over you, eyes staring into yours. You held in a moan as you felt him press himself against you, your back arching from the contact. “I want to hear you, baby.” He groaned, grinding against you. His lips found their way back to the side of your neck, harshly sucking and biting on the skin; painting it with hickeys. His hands traveled over your body as whimpers kept escaping your lips; low groans leaving him, vibrating against your skin. 

One of his hands traveled down your body, pressing against your core. You gasped loudly, eyes shooting open to be met by Seonghwas. “You’re so wet for me, baby” His fingers slowly drawing circles on your clit over your panties. “Such a good girl” He cooed, his other hand caressing your cheek. His words made your mind go blank. Was this actually happening right now? 

His lips smashed against yours, desperate to taste you. You kissed him back, your hands sneaking into his hair; slightly pulling on it. He groaned into your mouth from the action, feeling like he was about to snap any second. He nibbled on your bottom lip, tongue immediately going in to explore your mouth once you opened it for him. 

He broke away from the kiss as his hand left your dripping pussy. You whined, bucking your hips; missing his touch already. He chuckled, looking down at your face filled with desperation to be touched. His hand moved up to your face, holding his fingers out to you.

“Open up, baby,” He said, a small smile on his face. You hesitated, staring up into his eyes. “Come on, be a good girl for me.” You slowly opened your mouth, allowing him to stick his fingers inside. Your mouth closed around his fingers, your tongue dancing around them. You moaned against them as you tasted yourself. 

He groaned from the sight, feeling himself grow harder by the second. “There we go, baby.” He pulled his fingers out of your mouth before moving to sit up. His hands traveling up and down your thighs. 

Seonghwa felt like he was on fire, seeing you like this on his bed had him feeling like he was going insane. He had waited for so long, sleeping with a bunch of girls wishing it would’ve just always been you. But now you laid in front of him, desperate to feel his touch. 

“Hwa…” You managed to whimper out his name. Waiting for him to do anything, rather than just stare at you. Something in him snapped, hearing you whimper out his name had his head spinning. Without a second thought he ripped your panties off, throwing them to the side. His lips found their way back to yours, his fingers going back to pussy. You gasped from the sudden action, your back arching from the feeling. 

“I’ll make you feel so good baby,” He said, lips moving down your throat. His lips left your body for a split second as he threw your shirt off, throwing it in the same direction as your panties. 

His mouth found its way to your boobs, putting one of them in your mouth, sucking and biting on your nipple as his hand gave attention to your other one; pinching and squeezing on it. His other hand found its way back to your pussy, pushing two of his fingers inside without warning. You were a moaning mess underneath him, your hands once again tangling into his hair; tugging and pulling. 

You couldn’t think straight, your back arched and your body kept squirming. The feeling was overwhelming, you felt his fingers stretch you out; curling inside of you. The way he was touching you, as if he knew exactly what to do to make you go dumb. It was as if he knew your body like the back of his hand. 

He pushed a third finger inside, tears welling up in your eyes. You let out a sob as the pleasure became almost overwhelming. The tears fell from your eyes; and you felt your legs begin to shake as his fingers kept pumping in and out of you. 

Seonghwa lifted his head away from your chest, but his fingers never dared to stop. “Are you feeling good, baby?” He asked, his other hand moving to caress your cheek. You nodded your head yes; unable to form a proper sentence. He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “Use your words, baby.” He stopped completely, his fingers slipping out of you. 

“Y-yes…” You managed to breathe out, wanting for him to touch you again. “There you go,” His fingers slowly pushing into you again. “You’re such a good girl for me,” He continued, his free hand running through your hair. His lips moving to the side of your neck again, planting soft kisses over the hickeys he left. 

“Let me hear you baby,” He said in between kisses while making sure he was stretching you out enough. “Say my name.” 

“Seonghwa.” You whined; and that was enough to make him lose it. The groan he let out was enough to almost push you over the edge. His fingers slid out of you, moving to push down his pants enough to let his cock out. Without a second thought he pushed into you, shocking you enough for a scream to escape your throat. 

He stopped moving as soon as he was fully inside of you, his head falling into the crook of your neck. Tears streamed down your face from the sudden shock and the amount of pleasure you were feeling; small sobs continuing to escape your throat. Seonghwa whispered sweet nothings into your ear, doing his best to stop himself from just fucking you dumb there and then. Your arms wrapped around his neck, slowly getting used to him inside you. 

“You good, baby?” You managed to let out a small ‘yes’, making sure you actually used your words this time. You felt him nod in your neck. He planted sweet kisses over your shoulder as he slowly started moving. 

It didn’t take long for him to slowly speed up his pace, lips trailing back up to the side of your neck; once again sucking and biting on the already sensitive skin. One of his hands moved to loosely wrap around your throat. 

The pleasure had you feeling like you were about to slip away, you were a whining mess under him; your eyes rolling back. The sounds escaping Seonghwas mouth had your head spinning, turning you on even more. 

Seonghwa was loosing it completely. The feeling of you clenching around him almost made him go insane; the pretty sounds leaving you only adding to it. His lips left your neck to meet yours, knowing he wouldn’t last much longer. 

You could feel yourself getting close, legs shaking as broken moans left you. Seonghwa wrapped your legs around his waist, pushing even deeper and faster into you. 

“Seonghwa… I’m…” Was all you managed to get out between kisses. “It’s alright, baby.” He reassured, knowing he was reaching his high as well.

You let out a loud moan as your orgasm washed through you, Seonghwas thrusts getting sloppier; loosing its rhythm. He kept thrusting into you, helping you ride out your high before pulling out; spilling his seed out onto your stomach. He planted one last sweet kiss onto your lips before getting off you. 

He got off the bed, pulling his pants back up before leaving the room. You stayed still on the bed, your legs still slightly shaking; mind blank. What just happened? 

Before you knew it Seonghwa was back, gently wiping you clean with a warm wet towel. Once he finished he picked you up without a word, moving you into the bathroom; gently helping you into his bathtub. You melted in the hot water, body relaxing. Your eyes closed, a pleasant sigh leaving your lips. 

“Are you alright, y/n?” Your eyes opened back up, looking over at Seonghwa. His face was soft, a small smile spread across his lips as he stared down at you from the side of the tub. You nodded, one of your hands reaching for him. “Join me.” You let out, slightly embarrassed; even after everything you just did. 

Without another word he got undressed. You moved so he could sit down behind you, leaning back against him. You both sat there quietly for a while, just enjoying the warmth of the water. Seonghwa had his arms wrapped around your waist, with a smile stuck on his face. 

-

Seonghwa helped you wash up before helping you back into bed; making sure to change his sheets before doing so. You were both laying in each other's arms, still quiet. You were too scared to speak; afraid to ruin the moment. You could feel your heartbeat speed up, the realization of what had just actually happened almost pushing you into a panicked state. 

“I like you.” The words escaped your mouth before you could even react. Slapping one of your hands over your mouth, cursing at yourself. You heard Seonghwa chuckle, one of his hands running up and down your back in a comforting manner. 

“I like you too.”

© strawbxrryhwa, 2023

[orderforbrian]

ouuugghhh this comic is OLD but it's still one of my favorites 💖 i made rough blocks when the liveshow came out because jon and martin's meet cute/ugly is SO in character and so wonderfully funny

[Start ID: A two page comic of Jon and Elias from the Magnus Archives with Martin as a side character. Jon is a Persian man with short, dark curly hair and rectangular glasses. There are streaks of grey in his hair and eyebrows. He is wearing a green jacket with a grey sweatervest, white dress shirt, and green tie. Elias is a tan white man with slicked back brown hair, there are streaks of grey in his hair. He is wearing an expensive looking blue suit jacket, vest, dress shirt, and tie. He is also wearing long gold earrings in the shape of a closed eye. Martin is a mixed Polish/Korean man with dark wavy hair and glasses, and a beauty mark on his left chin.

1st panel: Jon slams open the door to Elias' office, looking the picture of rage. He is gripping a piece of paper angrily in one hand. A thought bubble shows a meme image of Spongebob choking Mr. Krabs from the series Spongebob. Elias appears unfazed by the interruption and greets Jon, "Oh! Hello, Archivist. I was wondering when you would finally catch me at my desk, haha."

2nd panel: Off panel, Elias asks "How was your first day?". Jon pushes up his glasses, gripping the paper even tighter and responds, "Undoubtedly horrendous".

3rd panel: Elias gives him an apologetic smile with his hands folded in front of his chest. He says, "Oh dear, that dreadful? Apologies you had to endure such unanticipated distress. What exactly happened to cause this reaction?". There is an arrow pointing to Elias that says "As if he didn't spend relish in every chaotic second".

4th panel: Jon begins to list things off, pointing to each finger as he does. Elias responds intermittently to these.

"Well, to start, the Archives is an ungodly mess. It's going to take ages before it gets sorted out. Why you didn't fire Gertrude is beyond me."

"Mm."

"None of the statements are compatible with modern technology so we've had to resort to using archaic tape recorders."

"Oh."

"And-"

"Oh, there's more."

5th panel: Jon tightens his fists in rage, gradually yelling, "I spent a large portion of my already stressful workday chasing after a bloody dog that your library transfer let loose into the Archives!"

6th: Jon begins to rant, shaking one hand back and forth in frustration. "Why is he there? What qualifications does he have? And absolutely what right? He's from Library, why do we need Library in the Archive staff, much more why him specifically? I requested Tim and Sasha who are far more competent than that - that bumbling idiot! Mr. Bouchard, I'd hate to overstep my boundaries but I really must say this was an unwise decision-". Elias cuts him off, a dialogue bubble with a simplified person smiling. "Oh dear - Archivist..."

Next page

1st panel: Elias gives Jon another apologetic smile. "I sent someone from Library because the Archives desperately needs someone skilled in cataloging. And, evidently, he has a Masters in parapsychology so give him time to prove himself a necessary addition to your assistant team."

2nd panel: Jon appears disgruntled and crosses his arms, grumbling, "Mmn. Well, he has quite a lot to prove after today...Apologies for doubting your decision, but if he continues to hinder our progress I will make my objections very clear." Elias says off panel, "I believe that's a fair compromise. Well, apologies again. As always, I'm open to feedback."

3rd panel: Elias continues off panel. "I'm a bit surprised though...". Jon looks up with wide eyes, a bead of sweat on his face. "Huh?". Elias continues, "You didn't find him the least bit charming? I thought he was rather amused the day of his interview, haha."

4th panel: Jon pushes up his glasses, attempting to hide a blush, and says, "A-as of my current opinion, no. I did not find his ineptitude charming if you'd kindly, Mr. Bouchard."

5th panel: Elias says off panel with a simplified smiling face, "Well, I do hope you all get along soon enough...". Jon presses the paper in his hand to his chin, looking off to the side. He appears disgruntled and is blushing too. Thought bubbles of Martin surround him. One is Martin appearing flustered, his eyes appearing as swirls within his glasses. Another is Martin hovering over Jon, asking if he is okay. Another is Martin looking up with a hand to his chin, stating "I mean...yeah, probably!". The last is Martin holding his glasses and giving a flustered smile, saying "Haha, s-sorry!". Jon thinks to himself, "Hrmm...He might be cute, but he's a complete airhead! Ugh. Hopefully today was just a singular incident."

End ID.]

[thus-spoke-lo]

cw: suggestive/18+; afab!reader

“What do you think, Sanji?”

Sanji glances up from his sink full of dishes and his meandering thoughts, and his eyes widen at the sight before him—you stand before him in the dining room, looking absolutely resplendent in a soft blue sundress, the shoulder straps tied in bows that sit perfectly on your skin, a row of glimmering pearlescent buttons running down the front of the garment from the neckline all the way to the hem. A gaps catches in his throat as he almost inhales his cigarette, and he grips the plate in his hand just a little too tightly as he tries to contain his reaction.

“You look…angelic, my sweet,” he finally manages to utter, every word dripping in longing. “Is—is it new?”

“Nami and I did a little shopping.” You laugh softly and shrug. “Well—Nami did a lot of shopping. I got this.”

“Well it’s lovely, ma chérie.” He swallows hard, and tries to ignore the tingling at the base of his spine as you move the skirt back and forth to show off how well it sways, every swish revealing just a little more of your bare legs, his lustful gaze catching a glimpse of your inner thigh. “You look simply ravishing in blue. In anything, really, but especially that.”

“You’re always so sweet, Sanji,” you coo as you hop up on the dining room table and perch, swinging your legs. “I’m glad you think it’s so lovely, I did too.”

He glances back down at the dishes, a sly grin on his lips. It’d look a lot lovelier on the floor, he thinks, picturing the thin straps sliding down your shoulders, the way he could easily pull that bodice down over your breasts without even unbuttoning it—or perhaps he’d sit back and ask you to undo each shiny little button, one by one, just to tease him a little, make him wait for his prize. He shifts a little in place, feeling himself harden with every sweet image that plays like a dirty movie of you on your knees with that dress pulled down, seeing how it pools around your legs while you—

“Sanji? What did you say?”

His cigarette drops from his parting lips and into the sink full of water with a quiet plop. “I…didn’t say anything, my dear.”

You hop down from the table and take a few tentative steps towards the kitchen, your sneakers squeaking on the wood floor, the machinations in your mind seeming to turn as you tilted your head to one side. “No, you definitely said something.”

“I-I think you must be mistaken,” he stammers, feeling the heat rising in his face. Merde. The words he had said in his head—just a small selection of the many, many depraved words he says about you a hundred times a day in his mind—must have tripped off his tongue without realizing.

“Mmm, no,” you say, almost tauntingly, one hand now resting on the counter just mere feet from him, the other pressing against your hip. “I am almost one hundred percent certain that I heard you say this dress would look ‘nicer on the floor.’”

“I would never say such a thing!”

“Oh really?” you grin, stepping closer, closer still, until you’re nearly against him. “Then why’s your nose bleeding, cook?”

Sanji touches the heel of his hand to his nose and pulls it away, his pupils blooming as he sees his skin stained red.

“It’s—it’s just so dry in here,” he stammers as he can almost feel the heat of your body radiating against his skin, his body beginning to succumb to that desire that pulses within his veins.

You smile sweetly, and blink, gazing at him through your lashes. “You know, I think you might actually be right.”

“About what?” he asks, turning his lower body to shield the ever-more obvious interest in the front of his slacks.

“About this dress.”

“H-how so, angel?”

A whimper leaves his lips as he watches you untie one of the straps of the dress, then the other, the fabric strings now dangling loosely, the top of the bodice beginning to wilt forward, exposing the soft skin of your décolletage.

You offer him a smile as you bite your bottom lip. “I’m starting to think it would look nicer on the floor. Shall we find out?”

[airyravenmaid]

As someone who's been secretly teetering around the SAGAU (that's "Self-Aware Genshin AU" for those who aren't aware 🥁) tag and works while thoroughly enjoying a lot of them, I think today's finally the day I put my own two cents in on it. Particularly, my two cents about how a certain redheaded owl stud would act in that verse. By all means, no hate to anybody who's written him any differently in their SAGAU stuff-- we're all here to have fun and junk; this is just how I personally think he'd be. You are free to disagree with any and everything I have to say under the cut, but I will have no badmouthing or the like.

Being perfectly honest, I haven't really seen much of Diluc in a ton of SAGAU works outside of him either being part of the "get the 'Imposter'" mob or individually attacking us if he comes across us solo and isn't in the know that we the reader are the real deal. Basically, he's more or less just kinda lumped in with the other highly devoted followers of the Creator without really standing out much in the plot. And, nothing particularly wrong with that, no, no, no, but here's where my hee-ho funny hot take comes in:

I don't actually think Diluc would really worship the Creator. In fact, I don't think he'd even like us at first. *Sojiro voice* Let me explain!

Diluc Ragnvindr is, in every sense of the word, a disenchanted young man. Now, we know he wasn't born as such, but we have the Knights of Favonius disgracing Crepus' death while the wound was still fresh and the falling out between Diluc and Kaeya upon the latter's revelation as a Khaenri'ahn spy to blame for that. Blah, blah, blah, that's right, we heard the story, over and over again, so, where does this tie into my personal interpretation of his thoughts on the Creator, you may ask? Well!

In the happier, more idealistic years before all hell broke loose on his 18th birthday, Diluc most likely did worship and revere the Creator per his upbringing since I think Crepus also worshipped them like a good chunk of Mondstadt does. No problems there. But, where was the "all-powerful, ever-benevolent" God of Teyvat when he'd lost his father and brother on that same, horrible night in different ways? What did they do when the Knights of Favonius openly spat on his father's name just to save their undeserved reputation? What did they give him during that four-year suicide mission he spent indiscriminately hunting Fatui agents before promptly getting the ban of a lifetime from the entire Nation of Cryo?

Nowhere, nothing, and radio silence.

Just another unreliable let-down added to the list, and another knife to his back.

(Imposter AU-wise) So, come present day, when the Great Big Phony™ drops and takes a throne that very much does not belong to them, everybody's over the moon and pulling out all the stops for their beloved God... except Diluc. Now, he's not so stupid that he openly badmouths the apparent Creator since that would get him some pretty unpleasant looks and land him in rather hot water, so instead, he shows no open reaction while rolling his eyes and scoffing at them wherever people can't see or hear. And, if we're going with the traditional portrayal of the Imposter being an uncaring tyrant, his already diminished opinion of the Creator's image is only further soured. He does nothing to damper or criticize anybody's faith since it's far from his place to, but they certainly won't see him joining in any day of the week, either.

And then comes the "Imposter", who's actually the true Creator that's been jiffy-popped into Genshin's world from the real one. Now, while he thinks it's beyond ridiculous that the people of Mondstadt and the Knights of Favonius (though, not as much surprise for the latter-- always so inefficient...) find it just to hunt down and torture somebody solely for looking like the Creator especially since nobody in town gives a shit that Venti and Barbatos look disturbingly alike for reasons only he (plus Jean and maybe Kaeya, if his Hangout implies anything) knows without actually presenting themselves as an active threat to humanity like, say, the Abyss Order or the Fatui, Diluc still can't help but secretly hand it to the alleged Imposter for being the first to have the guts to knock that "divine do-nothing" down a peg in some way, even if it is considered quite the risky move.

Should he encounter us while we're running for our lives worse for the wear for the above reason (and truly confirming that we mean no real harm and are just a victim of very unfortunate circumstance), Diluc is open to helping us get away safely under the radar and giving false info to the KoF like he did in his Story Quest since getting caught helping Teyvat's most wanted by the mob would not end well for him, either. And, he's pretty amicable when patching us up... but then he sees the dried gold blood and scars all over our body and realizes exactly who we really are. No, he doesn't do a full 180 and start blastin', but Diluc sure is now a lot colder towards us than he already is in general. Still helps us out, but we can taste the sudden mood drop. At some point, we discover his resent towards us for (from his perspective; can't exactly explain that we didn't actually make any of the characters' backstories since we're not HoYoverse and whatnot bc that wouldn't make sense to anyone in Genshin within the confines of the Creator!Reader AU without us sounding completely crazy) being seemingly nowhere to be seen around his and others' suffering despite being the God of All Gods capable of doing literally anything to help it, but simply choosing not to. Even if the Reader rightfully says they didn't do anything, Diluc's cold rebuttal is something along the lines of "No. You didn't.", and it's not the least bit reassuring.

If he were to stick around with us a bit longer during our escape from Mondstadt/whirlwind journey, then Diluc would come to understand that we really weren't as in control of everything bad happening to him or the world as he initially believed, especially if in his misguided blaming, it causes Reader to develop one HELL of a guilt complex feeling like they are responsible for fixing everything if it means putting an end to all the nonsense and abuse some of their once-beloved characters/acolytes are putting them through. Granted, the actual Imposter does have to be stopped and dethroned for all the shit they're pulling, but that's really all that falls on us as the unfortunate hero.

Other than that condition, though, we basically have someone that's thankfully not looking to hunt us down for absurd reasons and even helps us in our need, but at the same time curses us for letting him and many others down by not acting in some way when it mattered most.

[targaryenluvs]

all too well - l.h & p.g

summary: in which an angry pierre stuffs his relationship up and desperately tries to make it up to his devoted girlfriend. and while trying to make up for it he realizes that he’s already lost her to a certain british man. loosely based on ‘all to well’ by taylor swift. 

warnings: A N G S T, I REPEAT, A N G S T, profanity, drinking, just sadness, toxicity, anger, crying, screaming, pining?? if unhealthy relationships/toxic relationships hurt you or offend you, 2022 british grand prix (ifykyk), mentions of eating disorders and body dysmorphia and shitty mental health

word count: 2.0k

pairing: lewis hamilton x female reader, asshole!pierre gasly x female reader, platonic!f1 drivers x female reader, platonic!wags x female reader

requested: yes! here! highly recommend listening to all too well.

It was horrible. 

You had been sitting with the engineers during the Grand Prix, cheering your boyfriend Pierre on as you watched on. You felt as if the world stopped when him and Yuki spun off in unison. You could feel the world stop around you as you silently prayed they were okay. 

Collective groans of disappointment and shouts of anger broke out around you as you quickly flicked on the switch in front of you, allowing you to speak to your Pierre. “Pierre! Honey please, say something!” But you didn’t, just Yuki’s outburst of anger.

“Here.” Pierre replied as you let go of the breath you didn’t know you were holding. You sunk into your seat as you held your head in your hands, shielding your face from the Netflix cameras which no doubt wanted your reaction for a dramatic made-up plot line for the next season of Drive to Survive. 

It wasn’t long after before Pierre angrily walked through the Garage, frustration radiating from him as he weighed himself before stomping off. You followed him to his drivers room before shutting the door. Before you could turn around he stuffed his face into your neck as he broke out in sobs. 

“Shh, I know. Pierre baby I know, it's okay.” You spoke as your hands combed through his tangled hair. “Y/n. Always me? All the bad things, me. What did I do to deserve it?” The French-man cried as you felt yourself begin to cry too. “It’s not you love. You know it was Yuki’s fault. He’ll own up to it, I know he will. You’re amazing okay don’t beat yourself up over this. It was absolutely out of your hands. You know that. You did your best.”

“It is! But that doesn’t make up for my shitty season! I don’t deserve this.” He shouted. “Pierre, not here. Don’t get angry here. The media will eat it up, let’s go home. Fuck the interviews. I’ll make you feel better okay? Whatever you want, we’ll do it mon chéri.” 

“Fuck the media! Fuck you! Fucking isn’t going to make up for me missing out this race okay? You can’t make me feel better with food or cuddling Y/n.” 

“That’s not what I’m saying Pierre! Please let’s get out of here, please, please.” 

“This is my fucking job. I can’t just leave because I’m mad. I’m not a model who sells photos of my self for money okay? My job isn’t easy like yours.” 

You scoffed, “Easy? Easy? My job isn’t just sitting around looking pretty. Shit goes on behind the scenes that you have no idea about. Bitchy models, photographers judging you all day, every day, tabloids and media making up  the most absurd rumours up and everyone eating them up, shitty mental health, body image issues, starving yourself to fit in a dress! Just because you sit in a car, racing at 200 kilometres an hour and have a dangerous job doesn’t make my job any less than yours!” 

“Mon amour-”

“No! I’m sick of this! You taking your shitty results out on me when I have nothing to do with it! You are driving the car, not me. Your fans attacking and picking apart our relationship and you letting them. You never defend me when interviewers ask the most foul questions about me. ‘Is she good in bed?’ are you kidding me?! ‘Oh you have no idea.’ And then laughing it off. Travelling the world and never getting out, constantly on the move. It’s so draining. Cancelling fucking Paris Fashion Week when I have never missed a year because you convinced me too. You. All you. I’ve missed out on huge movie and TV show deals, Bullet Train, Euphoria, No Way Home, Don’t fucking Worry Darling. Harry fucking Styles!” You shouted in his face as he sighed.

(Bare with me I know Paris FW is a few weeks before Bahrain)

“Then fucking go! God if I hold you back so much leave! I don’t fucking need you here, anywhere matter of fact. I don’t need you Y/n. I can get anyone I fucking want. Go to Harry Styles. Go to whoever you fucking want. Whine to them. They’ll never love you like I do. Fuck you like I do. You need me. But then again you. You need me, I don’t need you so fuck off. Get your shit and leave bitch.”

(foul, im so sorry 😭😭)

“Mate what are you doing!” Charles shouted as he burst through the door, followed by Charlotte, Isabel and Carlos. “Oh baby I’m so sorry.” Charlotte said softly as she and Isa wrapped you in a hug. You didn’t react. You didn’t even know what was happening. What pulled you out of your trance was the groaning of your boyfriend, well, ex now.

“What the fuck Charles?” Pierre yelled as Charles retracted his fist from his face.

Lewis ran in at the sound of yelling, Angela hot in his tail. “What the hell is going-” Lewis stopped dead in his tracks at the scene, Pierre soothing his right cheek, Charles with balled fists, Carlos pulling Charles away while Isa and Charlotte hugged you. You. 

You with your mascara stained face. You with your sobs and sniffles. 

It broke him. 

“My beautiful, beautiful Y/n.” He whispered as Isa and Charlotte slowly handed you off to him. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he kissed your forehead. As you stood in the hallway with him you felt, safe, loved. Which meant a lot since you hadn’t felt comfortable in a long time. 

You could feel the pain. The anger. The late nights worrying whether Pierre would come home or not. Trying to soothe him after bad races only to be met with a empty hotel room the second you took your eyes off of him. The rumours and the side eyes that floated around the grid when you walked hand in hand with him even after videos of him getting too handsy with some rando at a club surfaced and spiralled. Even your friends and family contacted you, your best friends Maddi and Sayda had reached out to see if you were okay.

‘Poor girl probably doesn’t even know.’

‘Why is she still with him? Oh god is she pregnant?’

‘She probably cheats too, you know how models are.’

But none of that mattered, as long as you were with Lewis. “Come on let’s get you cleaned up.” Charlotte said as she linked her arm with yours, “Don’t waste your tears on him sweetheart.” Isa whispered as she moved your hair out of your face.

“What the fuck is he doing with my girlfriend?” Pierre yelled at Carlos as he pointed at Lewis. 

“She is not and will never be your girlfriend again. You’re disgusting. It’s one thing to be angry and accidentally yell. But calling one of the most gorgeous, intelligent women on this Earth a bitch? Fucking despicable. She’s always been there for you, patient. When literal video proof came out of you cheating she didn’t blow up on you, start posting about you, start attacking you. No. Because she’s too kind for that and you took advantage of it and her. Y/n came straight to you for an explanation. And she told me your explanation, it was quite literally the worst fucking lie I’ve ever heard. ‘She thought I was her boyfriend.’ and ‘I thought it was you.’ Are you fucking kidding me man? You knew she wasn’t even in the country, she was on a plane, flying to your race after cutting a photoshoot with fucking Victoria’s Secret to come support you. You ruined her. You took away her opportunities because of your own selfishness. You will never find someone like her again. You fucked up. And I hope you kick yourself when you realize what you lost. Who you lost. Y/n is a thousand times more deserving of a man. Not a boy, someone who can’t even respect his own girlfriends career.”

Pierre stood there as Lewis walked away. If he stayed there any longer, looking at his idiotic face, god he would’ve swung.

But that was all in the past. 

Months ago. Seven to be exact.

And now?

Now you were making your way down the runway, in a stunning Donatella Versace dress in front of thousands. The crowd was roaring, cheering the models on as you all displayed the clothing. Your face dead straight. 

That was one of the things you praised yourself on. So did the media. You were known to never ever break face when on the runway. Always professional and well handled. But it was bound to happen. Your four year streak broken. 

As you made your way to the end of the runway your eye caught on to a certain braided hair man, who was hard to miss with his bright pink outfit. And god did he look amazing. As you looked at him he smiled, blowing a kiss. 

Your eyes crinkled as your lips turned upwards. Blowing a kiss back.

The media ate it up.

‘Y/n Y/l/n finally broke face on the runway, the reason? Seven time world champion Lewis Hamilton! Seems the model has moved on from her breakup with Lewis’ colleague and fellow racer Pierre Gasly.’

‘Lewis Hamilton culprit of the wide smile plastered on Y/n Y/l/n’s face during the Versace launch.’

‘Lewis Hamilton and Y/n Y/l/n share their relationship to the public!’

And Lewis could not be more proud of himself when he walked into the paddock, his hand entangled with yours. He was happy to show you off, respectfully of course. But Lewis wasn’t always kind, sometimes mischievous. 

So when he saw the idiot that was Pierre Gasly, jaw dropped and eyes threatening to hop out of his head at the sight in front of him while seated at the Alpha Tauri hospitality whilst having lunch with Yuki he decided to have some fun.

Taking your hand and spinning you in towards him, shortly before kissing you.

“That little fucker.” Pierre swore as he ogled you. “That’s what you get when you fuck up, badly.” Daniel snickered as he walked past, towards the two of you. “Danny!” You smiled as you engulfed him in a warm hug. 

“Missed me a bit too much Y/n/n.” Daniel smirked, “Lewis you better hold on to her tight, might just sweep her off her feet.” The McLaren driver joked as your boyfriend shook his head. “Seven months too late, I’ve been swept for as long as I can remember.” You grinned as you looked up at Lewis.

“You’re in love I get it.” Daniel laughed, “I’ll see you on the panel Lewis. See you tonight, my hotel room.” He joked towards you as he walked towards the conference hall, but not before winking your way. 

“Shit I have to go. If he comes anywhere near-” 

“I’ll be fine Lew, I promise. I have a guard dog in the form of Charles Leclerc ready to bite.” You smiled as you kissed him again. “Hey I do not bite!” Charles frowned as him and Carlos waited for you. 

“Sure thing Charles. Remember when you lost in uno to Lando-” Carlos smirked as Charles yelled, “Hey!” 

Lewis kissed your head, “Why would we ever think of having kids when we have those two assholes in red?”  “Rude.” Carlos stated as he and Charles crossed their arms in defense. “I’ll see you later my love.” He spoke before walking away. 

“Stop rustling his hair Carlos.” You scolded, “It’s not my fault he’s so short.” Charles scoffed, “Actually I am 180 cm, 5′9 thank you.” He spoke proudly as Sainz let out a laugh, “Mate, I’m 179.” The two of you chuckled and made your way to the Ferrari hospitality as the Monegasque tried to defend his height.

As you passed Alpha Tauri your eyes wandered and saw him. 

And you smiled as did he. But it didn’t mean you were over everything.

You remembered it.

All Too Well.

[queergaygaygaygay]

Something, I just realised that really resonated with me about Gwen in Across Spiderverse, is her clothing.

When around non-spiderfolk adults and at home she wears loose fitting clothing which seems androgynous and hides the shape of her body.

But, when with Miles and her spider friends, she dresses in tight clothing. She’s clearly comfortable with her body when around friends but she seems to feel the need to hide her figure around people outside her friend group.

Similarly, I struggle with my body and didn’t wear shorts or tight fitting clothing for many years because I had problems with how masculine my legs and torso looked due to body hair and my wide shoulders.

These traits caused much dysphoria until I made more accepting friends when I became more comfortable with wearing shorts, tight tops, jeans and even leggings. My dysphoria became less severe around them because I knew they saw me as a girl. I even realised that some of my features were rather feminine like the shape of my legs and hips (though I don’t have curves) so I started empathising them making me appear more feminine and womanly. My shoulders are also not broad compared to most men and it bacame obvious my dysphoria had been exaggerating certain features.

Whilst at home though, or out with family, I wear baggy clothing which, whilst isn’t masculine, hides my shape so no one can tell my sex because I’m scared of my family’s reaction to seeing me in feminine clothing. Simultaneously, I feel less comfortable because I know they will always see me as a boy.

I know many cis girls and boys, especially in their teens. have body image issues and feel more comfortable showing their figure around friends but, to me, Gwen’s choice of outfits, and how they shape her, is very trans. A lot of cis girls (not all) will still dress fem around family but just not in clothes which emphasise their shape but Gwen chooses to dress androgynously around her dad and is more comfortable showing her shape around friends. Of course, it is her choice how she dresses but there’s a definite contrast between her clothes around friends and her clothes around her dad.

This is just a reading and I don’t know how intended it was but I thought it was a cool and fun approach which I found in this video. (Apologies the link can’t be copied here for some unknown reason so here’s a screenshot.) They cover a lot of readings of the film involving queer theory, race theory and comic history.

Also can we just appreciate how cool Gwen looks in every scene. The gender envy is so strong. <3

[taranida]

Thomas Zane's writing or the lack thereof

The third and final point I left unanswered in my theory about the 70’s.

the extent of Thomas’ writing powers, since as much as it is stressed a lot that he wrote himself out of reality, Barry, with a little research, is still able to find out about his existence, yet Alan in one of the “Writer in the Cabin” TV’s claims “A story is a beast with a life of its own. You can create it, shape it, but as the story grows, it starts wanting things of its own. Change one thing, and you set off a chain reaction of events that spreads through the whole thing.” The chain reaction here never happens: we have hard evidence that both Thomas and Barbara existed.

I guess, I should start with the rules of writing things into reality, that we learn throughout several games.

In AW1 Alan says about chain reactions: change one thing and others will follow, because the characters and the world in the story must be true to themselves. In AWAN it expanded even further with Alan making his, sometimes quite ridiculous, phantasies come true by starting the chain reaction by nudging the reality to fit his writing. One way or another it’s established well enough: each word causes the butterfly effect. Write something wrong and the whole thing will fall apart or twist; forget to add a little detail and the event you lead to will never happen.

There is a bit more about it in his Hotlines in Control:

Be clever. Make them do the work. Form the image in their minds. They make it. You just imply. Incept. They are drawn to the mystery. Obsessed. You set it up, they put it together. Their interpretation. And there's only one, because you give them no choice. And they believe in it, because it's theirs now.

Again: put a detail in and make people do the work. If you do it clever, you don’t need to expand on every little thing, the story will leave them no choice but to accept, believe and act accordingly.

The story needed many beginnings. Many springs. Streams that turned into a river, a flood, and then, an ocean. This was one. Wake used the materials he had. The connections he had. The people. The places. Wake put them in to make it true. His wife. The psychiatrist. His city. These connections, like magnets, moved things. Alice was a conduit. She'd been in the Dark Place. The Thing-that-Had-Been-Hartman sensed her near. Sensed Wake through her. Went berserk. Broke loose. Wake made sure Alice was already gone by then. Safe. The more springs, the more the story became real. The more people believed. Cause and effect. It was extremely delicate and hard work. It had to go through the path of least resistance. Where success was most likely. Where there was a connection already.

Alan always stresses out how important it is to thread on reality, use all the tools to make the events as plausible as possible for everything to fall into place. Yet, much of his writing, that came true, is pretty unbelievable stuff. Mr. Door in the second game calls Alan out on it: the rules are self-imposed, the loops are a choice. My take on it and all the hoops Alan creates to jump through: it doesn’t really matter what you write, the chain reaction will happen, as longs as you, as a creator, believe that’s possible.

Thomas, as it is presented, certainly, believed that he can erase himself and Barbara from reality; believed that this was the only way to stop the Dark Presence, to undo his mistake. And we see that some of it worked to a certain degree, as Cynthia tells us:

“He tried to undo it, wrote himself, her, everything he’d ever written out of the world. He was so famous. And afterward no one knew. Oh, Tom.”

Alan, who was very involved in the literary world, doesn’t recognise the name when he sees the shoebox in the cabin; Barry claims:

“Yeah, okay... anyway, there was an island there, owned by a guy called Thomas Zane. Now, some of the articles I found about him make him out to be a famous writer. But I ran a bunch of searches, couldn’t find a single thing he wrote.”

Thomas’ works are really hard to come by; the only people who read him, aside from those who knew him closely back in the 70’s, are Alan and Samantha, who found poems in shoeboxes, and Jesse Faden, who might’ve or might’ve not possessed a shoebox of his at some point in time. But the very existence of Thomas Zane and Barbara Jagger is quite known.

Barry with little efforts finds newspaper articles by Cynthia:

“Zane was heavily into diving, so much so that the place came to be called Diver’s Isle. But the volcano under the lake erupted in 1970, and Zane went down with the island.” […] “It gets better: a local girl, Barbara Jagger, drowned in Cauldron Lake just a week earlier. They were lovers.”

Randolph, the trailer park manager, acknowledges that Barbara is quite famous around here:

“Sure, Jagger’s a local spook story: ‘The Scratching Hag!’ Comes for you in the dark. Childish stuff like that.”

(Thomas is a legend around Bright Falls too, by the way, as seen from this bit of Sarah Breaker’s dialog:

Not even mentioning the Diver’s Isle, that still bears the name given to it by Thomas’ hobby.)

Barry continues:

“I’m just getting to the best part: all of the articles about this stuff were written by Cynthia Weaver. I asked around, and she’s that crazy bag lady you met...” […] “Yeah, anyway, she knew both Jagger and Zane before they both died and she had some kind of breakdown.”

And we have two of those articles in the guide:

This one mentions Thomas at the very last paragraph

And here’s the one about Barbara’s death

What we need from them are dates. They both were written before Thomas erased himself and Barbara from existence, so why the chain reaction didn’t delete those evidences together with other magazines and newspapers that mentioned him or printed his works? I mean, the way-to-go for writers at the time was to publish their pieces in the press, even Alan started like this, yet there is nothing of Thomas’. The bits that remained are those written in Bright Falls, where the AWE, caused by the last poem, originated and is strongest. I don’t believe that the journalist being Cynthia matters in this case; she indeed remembers Thomas and Barbara, but her previous work has nothing to do with it and had to be erased.

There is also a problem of fighting the Dark Presence off. I have to admit, the more I dive into this topic, the more I question if Thomas even wrote anything about deleting himself and Barbara from the annals of history or tried to fix him unleashing the Dark Presence onto the world. All we know about this comes from manuscripts written by Alan and the only two other sources of information. One being extremely vague on what happen and what Thomas wanted to achieve:

The Poet and the Muse

In the dead of night she came to him with darkness in her eyes Wearing a mourning gown, sweet words as her disguise He took her in without a word for he saw his grave mistake And vowed them both to silence deep beneath the lake

And another telling a very different story:

This House of Dreams

The diver (or what was left of him, his true self) spoke the words of his secret poem. The poem described a new world, an island in this sea of darkness, a safe haven, a paradise, a “baby” universe. The nature of the dark place was such that anything dreamed up there, any dream or a work of art, would come true, just as true as anything in our world can be. And the poem came true and the essence of the diver and the essence of his girlfriend escaped from the darkness and disappeared into this new world to live there happily ever after; while their shapes, his now taken over by a bright presence, as his girlfriend’s had been taken over by a dark presence, surged up, through the opening in the lake to our world, to continue their battle there.

According to the Bright Presence here, Thomas wrote his masterpiece about the new world, a personal paradise for him and Barbara to be happy there; not about erasing all traces of their existence and trapping the Dark Presence in the depths it came from, since both Presences surged up to the new playground.

So, did Thomas even care about fixing any mistakes, except for not getting the real Barbara back? Or was his writing so sloppy, he failed to erase anyone from reality properly and failed to contain the Dark Presence in the lake? And what happened after he was cosily tucked away in his new private baby-universe in the Dark Place with his love? How exactly did he save Cynthia, as she claims, from the darkness with his light?

What horror was left behind?

In my theory about the cabin, I wrote that we are led to believe that Thomas was caring, considerate and aware enough to leave a loophole for him to help when someone, as he predicted, eventually will awake the Dark Presence. The catch here is: some of this information comes from Alan’s manuscripts; some — from the “characters trapped” in Alan’s story, as Cynthia put it. What if Thomas wasn’t any of those things? What if he only cared about himself and Barbara and wrote them the happy ending, leaving others to deal with the mess that he caused?

IN TENEBRAS CADERE

“To fall into darkness”. Indeed, in the memory of a very questionable poet.