#queer friend groups

[queergaygaygaygay]

Something, I just realised that really resonated with me about Gwen in Across Spiderverse, is her clothing.

When around non-spiderfolk adults and at home she wears loose fitting clothing which seems androgynous and hides the shape of her body.

But, when with Miles and her spider friends, she dresses in tight clothing. She’s clearly comfortable with her body when around friends but she seems to feel the need to hide her figure around people outside her friend group.

Similarly, I struggle with my body and didn’t wear shorts or tight fitting clothing for many years because I had problems with how masculine my legs and torso looked due to body hair and my wide shoulders.

These traits caused much dysphoria until I made more accepting friends when I became more comfortable with wearing shorts, tight tops, jeans and even leggings. My dysphoria became less severe around them because I knew they saw me as a girl. I even realised that some of my features were rather feminine like the shape of my legs and hips (though I don’t have curves) so I started empathising them making me appear more feminine and womanly. My shoulders are also not broad compared to most men and it bacame obvious my dysphoria had been exaggerating certain features.

Whilst at home though, or out with family, I wear baggy clothing which, whilst isn’t masculine, hides my shape so no one can tell my sex because I’m scared of my family’s reaction to seeing me in feminine clothing. Simultaneously, I feel less comfortable because I know they will always see me as a boy.

I know many cis girls and boys, especially in their teens. have body image issues and feel more comfortable showing their figure around friends but, to me, Gwen’s choice of outfits, and how they shape her, is very trans. A lot of cis girls (not all) will still dress fem around family but just not in clothes which emphasise their shape but Gwen chooses to dress androgynously around her dad and is more comfortable showing her shape around friends. Of course, it is her choice how she dresses but there’s a definite contrast between her clothes around friends and her clothes around her dad.

This is just a reading and I don’t know how intended it was but I thought it was a cool and fun approach which I found in this video. (Apologies the link can’t be copied here for some unknown reason so here’s a screenshot.) They cover a lot of readings of the film involving queer theory, race theory and comic history.

Also can we just appreciate how cool Gwen looks in every scene. The gender envy is so strong. <3

[fixing-bad-posts]

[Image description: A tumblr post, edited blackout-poetry style. The redacting lines comprise an abstract geometric pattern in the colours of the transgender pride flag. Resulting text reads, "Trans women are friends with lots of trans men."]

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Trans women are friends with lots of trans men.

Submitted by @autisticfordprefect

[nterini]

The Leftover Kids in ONLY FRIENDS

A character analysis of Boston and Ray Ep. 6

This episode reveals a bit more about Boston’s character, and while it doesn’t justify his actions (because your past doesn’t have to justify all your present decisions, especially in fictional characters) we’re able to better understand his impulse to “humble” others when it seems to him like they’re finding their own way.

We learn that Boston’s mother remarried, and flew to another continent to start her new life. And while I don’t want to make assumptions, something about Boston’s politician father (who calls him only to speak about his campaign and winning over young people) encouraging his son’s impulses to toy with the emotions and bodies of others may have had something to do with it. Boston, time and time again tells Nick that the potential of the public finding his sex tapes (with other men) would be a burden to his father’s career. We don’t know if Boston has come out to his father, but the ultimatum that Boston must graduate or be sent back to New York to live with his mom shows his father’s willingness to get rid of a son that may not fit his public image. Boston is a talented photographer and someone in the demographic he wants to target; why so eager to send him away.

In the next scene, while comforting our favorite crazy lovesick puppy, he tells Nick, that the reason he doesn’t make lasting relationships is because he knows he has to leave anyway (and some more be about how he’d be a better photographer abroad). Maybe it’s because of the pressure he feels from his father, but Boston believes that there’s no place for him permanently anywhere. No one has chosen him for an “unconditional forever love” and no ever one will. He’s had no power over that. If my assumption that Boston’s father already knows of his son’s sexuality, and is slowly freezing him out and that Boston knows this already, Boston’s view of his future in Thailand, one that will always be queer, must be bleak. His own father, a popular candidate elect, does not want him. This loss of control triggers him. We see Boston seek control of potential rejection in the way he pursues his flings. He prefers Nick over all his other flings because he’s confident that Nick will always choose him no matter what selfish things he says. He’s envious of Mew who’s constantly chosen and pure, of the perfect Top who rejected him and has his life together, and of Ray and Sands budding relationship. He believes he’ll be left alone again, so he sabotages externally against anyone’s progress.

It’s what makes his scenes with Ray that much more interesting. Because Ray is just like him, except he sabotages internally. 

We were introduced to Ray’s family background a few episodes back, and the toll it took on him emotionally, physically, and mentally. His mother was a young and talented actress who married rich, and whose light was dimmed in that marriage. And whether it was resentment over her lost career, Post-partum depression and an uncaring husband, or just a worsening addiction that was left untreated, she died alone drowning herself in alcohol. We know that Ray did not receive much affection from his mother and that his father was just as neglectful. Ray has learned to use money to buy emotions, companionship and intimacy. Unfortunately, he seems to be following in both his parents footsteps. 

There is a theory going around that Boston has had a secret unrequited crush on Ray. And while I don’t think there’s a lot of evidence that supports this ship, it’s a plausible theory. However, the way he constantly goes back to Nick when he needs comfort and conversations, other than just straight sex, says the opposite. I think a better conclusion would be that Boston finds comfort in Ray’s lack of growth and misfortune. After all, they’re very similar. Leftover, abandoned, rich kids that were never chosen. I don’t even think he had any ill intention against Mew when he slept with Top or even with Ray. I think deep down he’s secretly comforted by seeing Ray heartbroken. It makes sense that he was triggered when he saw that Ray might have found someone to help him come out of that misery. He doesn’t provoke Mew or Top the way he does Ray. Maybe it’s because Ray doesn’t see how similar they are. Maybe it’s because Top and Mew see right through him. 

Mew’s role in their friendship is also really interesting 🤔. Ep. 7 might give us inside Mew’s thoughts and actions. Is Mew manipulating his rich friends to get his dream career and partner or is it all all a grand plan to help heal the lives of the people he cares about most.

Overall, I love how real the show feels. The discussions of drugs in Thailand’s queer community, of privilege and class struggle, it all feels incredibly genuine. It’s hot and steamy and we’ll written. Like we CAN have all of these things at once! The growth that I see in BL/Queer (the slash is necessary) content gives me hope. Please give the lesbians (AprilNamchueam) more screen time plsssssssss 😩.

(Please excuse any typos and errors.)

[midwestfairyprincess]

🧣🌹💋

[cyanide-latte]

tag urself im librarian demi

[beeesworld]

Yeah. It's nice just to be around other gay people.

James

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

Every queer friend group during Pride

[her-stars]

im tired of every cool goth girls being far away from meee I miss my queer festival friends :(

[unsognoallavolta]

Persona in cerca di amic* ☀️✨️

Ehi ciao!

Sono Benny (o Ben), she/they, ho 23 anni. Mi sono appena laureata all'Accademia di Belle Arti e tra poco inizierò un master riguardo i videogame e il mondo 3d.

Sono un'ottimista, amante della vita e delle esperienze, di qualsiasi tipo, dal viaggio in macchina improvvisato alla serata tranquilla a guardare film e chiacchierare. Tra l'ascoltare e il parlare preferisco decisamente il primo: adoro poter conoscere le persone attraverso i racconti delle loro esperienze di vita.

La mia chiacchierata ideale è stesi sul letto, sul pavimento o su un prato, a guardare il soffitto o il cielo e chiedersi il perché delle cose, parlare di sogni, delle esperienze passate e di quelle che ci piacerebbe vivere. Senza vergogna o giudizio. Uno spazio sicuro di condivisione.

Sto cercando persone con cui chiacchierare della vita, commentare serie tv insieme, viaggiare e sognare, scoprire nuovi interessi e passioni, riscoprire ogni giorno quanto, nonostante tutto, siamo fortunati ad essere vivi.

Mi ritrovo spesso (quasi sempre) sola. Mi sono accorta che le persone buone molto spesso vengono usate e poi dimenticate. Attraverso questo blog mi piacerebbe trovare qualcuno che almeno una volta si sia sentit* così. Nessuno è destinato a rimanere solo, combattiamo insieme la solitudine 🌻

Qui vi lascio un elenco delle cose a cui sono interessata, spero potremo avere qualche interesse in comune 😊:

Serie Tv: Heartstopper, Good Omens, Loki, One Piece, Arcane, The Dragon Prince, The Owl House, Jujutzu Kaisen, Attak on Titan (e molte altre. Accetto volentieri consigli su nuove serie da vedere).

Film: mi piacciono tutti i generi tranne l'Horror (mi fanno troppa paura 😂). Sono un'appassionata dei film d'animazione.

Libri: non leggo molto ma sono super disposta a leggere qualche libro insieme. Alcune mie letture correnti sono: La casa sul mare celeste, La canzone di Achille e Finché il caffè è caldo.

Videogiochi: Genshin Impact e Honkai Star Rail (ma spero di ampliare la mia lista al più presto).

Hobby: giardinaggio (amo le piante 🌱), disegno, fotografia, mondo 3d e animazione digitale, passeggiare immersa nella natura, viaggi.

Altri hobby a cui spero di avvicinarmi a breve: imparare a cucire e a usare l'uncinetto, dipingere sia su carta che su tessuti, imparare a scolpire con l'argilla e realizzare vasi e tazzine. Sono aperta ad imparare qualsiasi tipologia di arte 🎨

Se siete arrivat* fin qui vi ringrazio e se siete interessat* potete anche solo lasciarmi un 🩷, vi scrivo io 🥰

(Il mio main è @thinkingaboutminds, potete trovarmi anche lì)

[metalichotchoco]

This is what queer friend groups look like- jk jk lol

I love the worsties, they are all so dramatic and villainous in completely different ways it’s so much fun

[mostlyvoid-partiallyturtles]

Every queer friend group is a pick and choose of the following:

Eldritch Horror

Autism Creatures (take a handful)

Goth/Witch

Harbinger of the Distant Prince (may he be merciful)

Gremlin(s)

Literally could just be ten rats in a trenchcoat and you couldn't tell the difference

Bookworm

Perpetual Hoodie

The uuuuuuh... the man, he was wearing a jacket, it was tan. I think. yeah. Man in the Tan Jacket. He's got a buzzing deerskin suitcase? He might have infiltrated your friend group. Please report sightings to the Secret Police.

The Friend with Infinite Pets (i.e. six cats, a dog, some fish, and a lizard. looking at my friend. he lives over thataway.)

Erika

Erika

Erika

Erika

Erika

Theater Kid(s)

[radioactivegeodes]

Finding irl lesbian community is very hard and I hate it. Yes, I have some lesbian “friends” at home and at school basically all my friends were lesbians but school was in Boston and I left which leaves me with the one lesbian I’m actually friends here with to be my lesbian community. I don’t even live in a place where it’s particularly unsafe (at least for now) and there are tons of queer people, I just want a LESBIAN place to go. I want a butchfemme bar that lets 18+ in so that even though I can’t drink for another two years I coulda till go and find community

[blackinkroses]

Okay, so I don't know if this has to do with some subliminal gaydar or something, but literally all my friends that I had growing up and now are currently queer. Like, those two girls I made friends with and moved away (at different times) but have moved back to my school? One came out as a trans man and and the other as genderfluid. That one girl that moved to Georgia but has ghosted me for a while now? Came out as a lesbian few weeks before I lost contact. That friend I was on again of again friends with but now we're like siblings? Non-binary and queer. THAT PERSON I RANDOMLY TALKED TO IN GYM AND ALSO IS NOW MY BESTIE? A TRANS GAY MAN! All I know is that we're all weird loner introverted kids, and I'm starting to think either we were all in a pipeline or I have been a queer magnet since birth!

[sapphic-in-a-city]

Sapphic people, let's be friend.

Drop a 💛or message me

So like how does one person makes friends?

I remember making 1 years ago and I decided it's enough 😅😅😅😅

But anyway I need some sapphic friends just to feel at ease and have a sense of belonging cause the people around me are conservative and I'm still closeted.

A little bit about me

I'm 20, AFAB and go by the pronouns she/her.

I love reading books, listening to music and watching anime.

I've zero tolerance for any kind of discrimination so if you're discriminatory in any context stay away.

[porcelaintoybox23]

How do ya'll find found families??? How do you find your queer friend group??? How do I find my people? Where do I find like-minded people who I can talk to???

I'm autistic, I don't understand how to make genuine friends, and I'm sick of pretending I will figure out the secret

[profecional-dreamer]

heartstopper was good but like

for a cast of queer characters they didn’t match super well to my experience with queer groups. it’s so clean. 

in my friend group we had:

ace demigirl who loved dark academia and had body issues

genderfluid omni-ace polyam aro-something dsmp obsessed nerd with body issues (me)

straight girl whos dating the demigirl’s ex bf and has body issues

the aro girl who everyone’s had a crush on at one point

agender dick head who refuses to tell me his birthday (my ex)

vaguely-conservative biromantic that calls every fictional character her child (who i’m in love with) (we aren’t discussing it)

straight girl who’s catfished mulitple boys on insta and has terrible social anxiety. 

artsy she/they who’s infinitely better than everyone else here

nobbinary/trans guy whos two years younger than us and dresses like a fucking circus clown (makeup included)

honestly IKSW and OLS do a much better job.

Oo Oo I’m gonna add to this now that I have new friend group (moved)

blue hair spilt dye plus sized panromantic demisexual who uses they/them, is emo, and is taking like nine APs

Ace lesbian questioning aro plus sized girl who has autism adhd, and like seven other things

Autistic person who changes their name once every two months and can’t decided on a label besides “not boy”, stunning singer and my best friend in the world

panromantic girl who doesn’t have any mental illnesses, im friends with her mum, she realized she was gay this year, she has chickens

bi girl who I’ve been platonically married too for a while now, has a fucked up family life and is the grade below us

and me, murder and gay podcast obsessed omni lesbian, gender-fluid whore who is generally, as far as I can tell, the loose canon of the group!

good omen and Hannibal are awesome queer tv shows with really fun and just, chill rep