#I am talking out of my hair it is unlikely that i'll ever do anything the fact that keeping count even exists is a bloody miracle

[nerevar-quote-and-star]

Dangerously close to plotting a real Skyrim/Lord of the Rings crossover for after Keeping Count because my secret desire for Leara/Glorfindel has reared its head again

Shhh Don't question it.

[yelenasdiary]

Heyyy♥️ I wanted to request Melina x fem!reader with prompt 48 from your prompt list?

48. kids falling asleep in the car on the way home and their parents don’t want to wake them up

Maybe they have like a family fun day and all the fluff. I know that this is probably not Melina coded but I want to be married to Rachel/Melina so this is all I have 🥲

Another Block?

Pairing: Melina Vostokoff x Fem! Reader

Summary: After a family day out, the girls, Yelena and Natasha are fast asleep in the back and just for a moment, everything seems perfectly normal.

Tiny Angst | Fluff | No Warnings | 0.9K |

AC: My first Melina request!!! I took a little spin on this; I hope that’s okay! Reader is Yelena and Natasha’s “parents”. No hate to Alexei, I love him lmao. I hope you enjoy this x 

A family outing with your little family wasn't at all a part of the mission you and Melina were directed to do but it did fall under the category of making the "pretend family" as Dreykov could call it, look real. You and Melina decided to take the girls to the Cedar Point Amusement Park for the day. Of course, at first, Natasha, the eldest wasn't too interested in the idea but Yelena couldn't hide her excitement. She requested her song, American Pie about five times before Melina had to convince her to listen to the radio for a little while. 

Once arriving at the theme park, you instantly saw the hidden excitement in Natasha's eyes as she looked up at one of the rollercoasters. A soft smile tugged at your lips before you felt Yelena excitedly pull at your jacket, "Come on Ma!" she smiled widely, showing you exactly how many of her adult teeth were beginning to come through. 

"Natasha are you ready?" you asked, looking at the young teen while Melina grabbed the backpacks out of the car. 

"Yeah, let's go" Natasha slightly rolled her eyes to prove to you and Melina that just going on a family outing wasn't going to change what she already knew. 

Given Yelena was only 6 years old, everything was new and exciting to her. Her jaw dropped at each new ride her eyes locked onto, at least for her this was a real and her little mind never gave it a second thought unlike Natasha who struggled to allow herself to enjoy days like these. 

"Yelena, no running off please!" Melina reminded the young girl who ran ahead, stopping at Melina's words. "But mom! I don't want to miss the good rides!" She turned on her heels, causing both you and Melina to chuckle. "You don't love, the park doesn't close until night" you smiled softly. Melina took a hold of Yelena's small hand and walked ahead, giving you a chance to talk to Natasha. 

"You know, today isn't about making this look real" you spoke as you walked alongside the teen with blue hair. "You say that but everything we do is too make us look like we're a real family and one day, I'll have to go back. What happens to Yelena when the time comes?" Natasha snapped as she looked up at you. 

Mission or not, it broke your heart to hear those words come from her mouth. Three years doesn't seem like a long time but within the time of being together as a four, your heart grew to love the girls as if they were your own, you see them as your own and nothing would ever change that, you just wish Natasha would see that.

"Things will be different, I promise" you replied, lying to her and you hated yourself for it. 

"How?" Natasha asked with the tiniest hint of hope in her voice. 

"Because, neither Melina or I will let anything happen you girls and I know you're having a hard time trying to see that, but I love you, Natasha. You're my daughter and no mission will change that" 

"But you can't promise that when I go back, that things will be okay" 

"I can and I am. Melina is a lot closer to Dreykov than I am, if you think she'll let him hurt you or Yelena in anyway, you don't know Melina well enough" you replied, seeing your words put the teen at ease. She smiled, "I love you too" Her words came to you in an almost whisper, but they warmed your heart. 

----

After hours of going on ride after ride, snack after snack and of course some shopping, it was time to head home. Yelena was coming off a sugar high and both you and Melina could tell how tired the girls were. After your talk with Nat, she let her guard down a little and allowed herself to enjoy the day as a normal 11-year-old. 

"Thank you for taking us" Nat smiled at both you and Melina as you all gathered at the car. 

"You're very welcome girls" Melina smiled, helping Yelena into her seat. You smiled back at Natasha, for the first time in a while she looked genuinely happy. 

The car ride home was rather quiet, everybody was too tired and achy to want much of a conversation but of course, Yelena asked if Mac n Cheese was on the menu for tonight's dinner. "I'm sure we can cook some up when we're home" you replied, looking at the 6-year-old through the review mirror. 

The radio played softly as Melina drove you all home, your hand resting gently in her free hand, her thumb stroking your knuckles with love as you watched passing vehicles through the window. "They both had a lot of fun today" Melina whispered when she saw both girls in the backseat asleep. "Natasha seemed to really enjoy herself as well" she added. 

"I'm really proud of her today and letting herself enjoy the day" you replied, looking over at Melina as she pulled up in the drive away. "Do we have to move them?" you asked in a whisper, looking over your shoulder. 

"Let's just do another block and see if they wake up, if not, we'll park in the garage and wake them when dinner is ready" Melina suggested, placing a soft kiss on your cheek. Moments like these made you both forget the meaning of everything, the red room, the mission, the widow program and most importantly, Dreykov. It was just you, your wife and the two young and beautiful girls you shared with her and as Melina took her time, driving another block with her free hand intertwined with yours, you forever wished things would never change.

[juunobox]

──★ ˙ ̟ there really is no freedom here, is there? (nikolai gogol x gn! reader)

summary : TALKING ABOUT EXISTENTIAL CRISIS THE COMPLEXITIES OF BEING A HUMAN WITH NIKOLAI !!!!!!! HOW FUN!!!!!!!!!!! warnings : mentions of god,,, um,, nothing explicit i swear just existential crisis note : p short, and maybe absurd, my brain hasn't been braining for a while now. unlike my other fics, this one is written in 1st person pov

"Is this why you're always so theatrical, Nikolai?"

"Huh?" Nikolai turned to me, the juggling balls he'd been playing with falling to the floor.

"To mask those emotions deep inside you," I muttered, pulling up my knees to my chest.

Nikolai cocked his head to the side, his silence unbroken as he observed me. His grin then widened, and he closed the distance with dramatic, comically wide strides.

"Well, I guess I do!"

He crouched down before me.

"But you know what, dove? It never really works, if I'm being honest. No matter how much I laugh, make jokes, do magic tricks…"

Letting out a forced giggle, Nikolai held onto his temple and dramatically tossed his head back, bursting into laughter.

"Hahaha! No, no! It's not because I want to 'mask' those emotions, [y/n]! I just think if I suppress them well enough, I won't be able to feel them anymore one day. Then I'll finally be free!"

A grin spread across his lips as he flapped his arms; motioning a bird's wings. I let out a shallow laugh, shaking my head.

"Deep down, you do know that won't be the case, right, Kolya?"

His smile instantly faltered at what I just said.

"..."

For a moment, there was a lull in conversation.

"And why do you think so, dove?"

I had to swallow hard before I could respond with a nod.

"Sure, you technically won't feel anything, but boredom and numbness are still emotions in itself..." I buried my face in my arms, letting out a quiet sigh, "And I have a hunch that you're aware of that, Kolya. But, well, I'm just expressing my thoughts." I continued.

"You didn't need to remind me of that, [Y/N]..." Nikolai muttered out in a hushed voice, taking off his eyepatch and letting it drop to the ground. As it collided with the floor surface, I looked up, finding his gentle yet sorrowful smile.

"There really isn't any freedom, is there?" He said, lifting his hand towards the sky and splaying his fingers as though trying to reach something above. "I suppose we'll be trapped in here forever. We won't ever leave this warm, wet cage, for so long as we're alive."

I let the silence between us sink in for a moment.

"Being a human is so simple, yet so complicated, and so limiting, all at the same time."

A soft laugh emanated from Nikolai as he reached for a strand of my hair, idly twirling it between his gloved fingers. "Go on, dove," He coaxed, encouraging me to speak my mind even more.

"Well... and when people tell me 'your body is your own', it certainly doesn't feel like it. If it really is mine, then why does my emotions, drives and control everything that I do? If it really is mine and mine alone, why am I so controlled by my emotions? It should be the other way around, right?"

"Mhm mhm," the clown hummed, showing he was still listening.

"My emotions... they always feel... so out of control. And why am I driven by my own emotions in the first place? Is it because I'm human? Is it because an entity above me is controlling my emotions, some sort of God, perhaps?"

"..."

"Hahaha! Now, now, that's scary, [y/n]! I certainly would hate that!" Nikolai laughed out loud, the loudness startling me a bit.

"If God is really there, then this just means he can't save anyone." Nikolai's voice softened as he smiled and let go of my hair, his hand now gently cupping my cheek instead. "That's why, we need to find our own way to be free. Find the path to our freedom, in our own ways." he said earnestly.

"I will find a way to free us both," he added, "But for now... I just want to cherish your presence."

I looked at him with a soft smile and asked, "A long day, was it?"

Nikolai agreed with a nod, removing his hat before leaning against me. He slowly closed his eyes and gently took my hand, guiding it to ruffle his silvery locks. "Your touch is so comfortable, can I just take your hand away?" He suddenly spoke, his tone playful.

"I'm not letting you amputate me."

"Hehehehe!" Nikolai only giggled in response and continued to nuzzle against me. "I'm just kidding, dove!"

[thrandilf]

Checkmate

"Poof!" Aaravos giggled to himself, the lightness at sharp odds with the high stakes Viren felt bearing down on him more and more by the minute.

"Please."

Viren could plead for his life if he must. He looked at Aaravos's amused expression, reminiscent of a cat batting at yarn, while Viren felt his world diminishing, his breaths labeled with numbers. Hours. That was all he had.

Aaravos angled his head, still smiling. "Please what?"

They'd played this game before, of pushing and pulling, of choosing what angle to show to the mirror, of pretending Viren had ever had any power over the being before him. He'd been foolish, but desperate. He'd thought back then that he'd run out of options. Now, now he understood how it truly felt to be backed against a wall, to have death staring him in the face. Now he knew optionless.

Aaravos had won so completely that he held Viren’s remaining time like grains of sand to play with between his palms.

Viren was done playing.

"Aaravos, please." Viren was only a lavender projection, but he had no doubt he could sob if he must. "I'd do anything. Even if you have no fondness for me, please, for Claudia."

Aaravos raised his eyebrows. He leisurely paced around Viren, circling like a shark. His smirk was audible in his tone. "You speak like you're the dirt under my feet, yet you still stand."

He knew that cue.

Viren sank to his knees in defeat, head bowed. His heart pounded, he trembled too much to talk back, to protest.

Aaravos continued. "There. Now, do you truly know your place, or is it that we forgot your spine when reassembling you?" he mused.

The words tasted like dust. "You won, Aaravos. I- I know my place."

"Oh, I think you're starting to learn it, yes."

Aaravos crouched down. He reached his hand out and laid it on Viren's cheek. Somehow, he was able to sustain the physical touch. Viren's eyes widened as Aaravos tenderly raised Viren's gaze up to his, pure fear meeting smug control. Aaravos's hand drifted down like a caress until he reached Viren's neck. He closed his hand around Viren's throat.

"Please," Viren wheezed. "Aaravos, please, I'll do whatever you want. I never betrayed you. I did all you asked!" Viren's spirit broke, pressed between the ticking clock he felt in his bones and Aaravo's grip. He coughed on a sob, shaking so hard he was wondering if all of this was enough to have a panic attack on top of it all.

Aaravos leaned close. "So, you admit you are mine?" Aaravos murmured in his ear.

Chills ran through Viren. "Yes. Yes, I am. Aaravos."

Aaravos let Viren's neck go, instead stroking his hair as Viren gasped. He even pressed a kiss to the top of Viren's head.

"I am merciful, Viren, unlike our enemies." Aaravos smiled, voice still a purr. "You won't become my enemy, of course, so you have nothing to fear."

Viren barely managed to nod. Surrendered down to his free will, kept obedient even without the use of the strings Aaravos could pull on any time. How much of a life was this?

Aaravos stood upright, looming over Viren, eyes deceptively warm. "I'm so glad we understand each other."

[lucifersimp333]

●MC with PCOS or Hormonal Imbalance●

Scenario: You are a MC with female anatomy who suffers from PCOS or a hormone imbalance. You have abnormal periods, painful cramps, and grow some facial hair. Here is how the brothers would respond!

TW: Facial hair on femine face, hormone imbalances, weight gain, food restriction

LuciferXmc, AsmoXmc, BeelXmc

As someone with hypothyroidism, I feel us hormonal imbalanced people need to be represented! We are beautiful,strong, and worthy of love! If you ever want to vent about the struggles of PCOS, hypo or hyperthyroidism, or any hormonal imbalance you may be struggling with I am all ears! Xoxo

ASMO

Went to go touch your face out of endearment, trying to give you a quick little kiss. You suddenly pulled your face away from his hands, you get embarrassed from people touching your face in fear they could feel some stubble.

He automatically looks so sad, how could you pull away from him? " Sweetiiiiieeee.... why did you pull away from me? Did I do something wrong baby?"

You admit that you don't like anyone touching your face because you're embarrassed about your facial stubble. You then explain you have PCOS and the struggles that come with it. He holds both of your hands and places them in his lap and rests his forehead on yours.

" My sweet darling.... You are absolutely beautiful in my eyes. I wouldn't want you any other way. I'm here to support you whenever you need."

He places both his hands on each of your ears, brings your head to his lips to gift you a soft kiss on your head. He wipes a little tear off you cheek and smiles gently at you."May I touch your beautiful face, my love?"

With your permission you allow him to touch your face. He doesn't go overboard , just places a soft hand on your cheek and smiles at you so lovingly. He looks deeply in to your eyes and gives you such a sincere, soft smile. " You are so beautiful, thank you for letting me touch yout face."

He takes his hands off your cheeks and looks at you for a minuet. " Don't tell anyone, but I actually have an insecurity as well."

Your eyes widen. What? Someone as beautiful as this demon, has an insecurity?

He pulls his sleeves up to show his arms. "Sometimes I think my arms look like noodles. Just so....thin! I try to lift weights with Beel from time to time, but I'm always so afraid to chip my nail polish!" He says with a slightly chuckle. " I guess I'll always have noodles for arms."

You smile at him. It was unlike him to share an insecurity and you really appreciate him being so honest with you to make you feel better. You both hug each other for a while, just enjoying each other's vulnerability.

If you're okay with it, he'll help you wax your lip and chin, following by using the best creams he has to take care of your beautiful skin. When you have painful cramps, hell hold you in his lap with a warm compress on your pelvis. He'll set reminders o his phone to make sure you take your hormonal medication so you don't ever forget.

Makes it a point to call you beautiful all the time ( like he didn't already). He doesn't do this out of pity, but because he genuinely believes you are so gorgeous. He doesnt want you to EVER think you are anything other than beautiful.

Beel

You were chowing down on some nachos with Beel when he noticed you were eating less than usual. Why are you counting chips? Why are you taking the most dry, naked chips out of the plate of nachos?

"Mc, why aren't you eating much? I know you didn't eat lunch today. Are you not feeling well?" He looks at you concerned. He places the back of his palm to your forehead, checking to see if you have a fever in fear you're not feeling well.

You mention that it's easy for you to gain weight due to your hormone imbalance. You gained a few pounds during the week and you don't want to gain anymore. You confide in him that you have always been insecure about your weight so you really try to watch what you eat sometimes. Just talking about this is making your eyes well up. You never really spoke about this to anyone and it's making you emotional l.

This demon is looking like a sad puppy. How could MC be insecure? They're stunning! Beel abruptly stands up, picks you up like nothing, holds you bridal style and looks you dead in the eyes after wiping away a teat off your face.

" I don't like..... I don't like that you feel like you have to restrict yourself just to feel pretty. You.... you are pretty..... the prettiest thing I've ever seen..."

He is hesitant at first, but while holding you bridal style he kisses you. It's the softest, most passionate kiss you've ever experienced.

He sits back in his chair and places you on his lap. You're both facing forward and he rests his head on your shoulder, rubbing your tummy softly. " I love your tummy, MC. I think it's so yummy! You know.... if I wasn't a demon, I would have a HUGE tummy!"

You giggle at his little joke knowing that what he said was true. He smiles after hearing you giggle, relieved he could make you feel at least a little better.

When he notices you staring at the mirror analyzing your body a little too long, hell go as far as to take the mirror away from you. He NEVER wants you to think low of yourself.

He makes sure you never skip a meal ever again. Even if that means he has to go hungry for a little bit, he'll make sure you eat first.

On really bad days when you imbalance is really fucking with you to the point you feel icky, hell sit you on his lap and rub your tummy. He'll give you every ounce of love that demon has in his body just so you feel loved and beautiful.

Lucifer

He was discussing the next vacation day with you and the brothers at the dinner table, deciding where you will all go. The brothers all agreed to go to the beach! Lucifed noticed you were awfully quiet on the subject, having a hint of nervousness in your face.

Once dinner was done, he walked beside you and rest his hand on your shoulder and bent his head down to your ear. " Come to my study in 10 minuets. I want to discuss something with you."

10 minuets later you are in his study sitting in the chair across the desk. He is doing his usual paperwork while speaking to you. " You didn't seem to be to pleased on the fact we're going to the beach next week. Is there a reason why, MC?"

You fiddle with hem of your shirt " I just..... I have a hormone imbalance which makes me a little more.....plump.... than a lot of woman. I don't feel confident in a swimsuit. I..... I also feel more comfortable wearing makeup to hide....." You get nervous and trail off in to silence. You can feel your eyes welling up.

As soon as you said you didn't feel confident he stopped writing and had all his attention on you. His gaze was soft, yet sadden. He felt his heart shatter in to a million pieces seeing your eyes get glassy.

" To hide what, MC?" His voice is gentle, but he wants you to release what you have pent up.

" I... grow a little facial hair which sometimes causes breakouts... so I hide it with makeup. Y-you can't wear makeup at the beach....." You quickly wipe a tear away from your cheek.

"Mc, look at me." He leans over the table and uses one finger to lift your chin up so you can look at him.

" I understand you may not be happy with how you look at times. But I assure you, there is nothing to be insecure about." He let's his word sink in for a moment before taking your hands and guiding you to his side of the table. He has you sit in his lap.

You lays your head on his chest and wraps his arms around you. " In all of the realms I've lived in, out of all the angels, devils, and humans I've seen.... you are by far the most beautiful being I have laid my eyes upon." He's stroking your hair out of your face and wipes away a stray tear. He lifts your head up to his and kisses you lovingly.

" I don't ever want you to hide who you are naturally. I promise with or without makeup, in or out of a bathingsuit I will find you breathtaking."

He goes with you to shop for a bathsuit you feel comfortable in, being so supportive the whole time. When he finally sees your face without makeup, he has the biggest grin on his face. You are beautiful, just like he knew you would be.

He never comments on noticeable facial stubble. It doesn't bother him one bit, and still finds you as irresistible as ever.

Makes it a point to compliment you on days where you finally decided you didn't need to wear makeup. His hear explodes with joy knowing that you are starting to feel as beautiful as he sees you. He is so proud.

[k1rameki]

THE TIME HAS COME EVERYONE. ITS TIME TO TALK ABOUT MY EXTENSIVE LIST OF TABI HEADCANONS (hcs are under the cut plus this also counts as a little debrief of his human design bc jesus christ i put so much effort into making this man's design it went through a LOT of trial and error before settling on what i got now considering ive gradually made him less and less "human")

also quick thing b4 i proceed – please please PLEASE ask before making things w my tabi design bc ive seen a rlly cool papercraft made w/o my knowledge and that was kinda sucky so ya thats around it (other than the basics of no nsfw and such)

APPEARANCE HCS

first and foremost — hes half japanese because i remember his aside counterpart being japanese iirc and i thought that was really cool and wanted to implement that into my own little hc (also he speaks like a dozen languages bc of another thing i'll go into detail with in a bit

so many different facial features, scarring (theres a very elaborate reason for this tbh), moles, freckles, etc all bc why not?? (freckles is primarily bc of my bestie crow and now im obsessed)

lashes bc why not, give every man a pair of lashes i think theyre pretty

PIERCINGS. so many piercings. this is primarily because i am a very firm believer that tabi gets piercings done because he wants to feel human again so he finds comfort in decorating himself as much as possible for that reason and also the aesthetic

broken horn bc of the mod events, damage beyond repair and whatnot

HE HAS LONG HAIR BC I SAID SO ‼️‼️ i figured considering he's been invisible for so long he never really knew what to do when it came to cutting his hair, so eventually it grew out to around his waist, and he kept that hairstyle ever since (he prefers wearing his hair in a ponytail or smth bc sensory issues when it comes to hair touching his skin)

a lot of tater's hcs infected my brain hehehehehe especially the tail and his hands still being what they were when they were cursed (also. paw beans. /vpos)

HES TRANS ‼️‼️ hes also very dumb and has very little regard for his health and forgets to take his binder off a lot (trust me he gets scolded a lot for that)

GENERAL HCS

hes autistic and has adhd — the autism hc i lowkey stole from crow but the adhd hc ive had for a long long while now — one of his lifelong special interests is performing arts and musicals

chronic insomniac — sleep? never heard of her

plays like 5 different instruments but primarily specialises in piano and guitar

safe food is anything sweet or chocolatey — he has a massive sweet tooth and is obsessed w cookies and pastries in particular which ayana baked for him a lot (ill prolly make a whole other post for her in the near future but guys. pastry chef aya. hear me out)

an absolute boss at board games, especially monopoly, and he constantly loves screwing everyone over

extremely hyperfixated on pokemon and owns a bajillion folders filled with cards worth a buttload of money, and a dozen plushies + figurines (projecting bc pokemon is one of my hyperfixes dont judge me) his fav gen is absolutely johto

his eyesight is pretty bad but like. not bad enough for him to be needing glasses (unlike a certain someone cough cough agoti)

speaking of said certain someone, he and agoti do each other's hair a lot simply because its really fun and provides some stimulation, and also because it helps tabi practice with self care and such

VERY SENSITIVE TO SOUND AND TEXTURES, often times he will probably start crying if something sounds or feels wrong

sometimes he forgets certain words in english and has to resort to using what theyre called in russian

has the goofiest sounding laugh ever and i will die on this hill. when you get tabi cackling he will start rolling on the floor and making the most UNGODLY sounds

can speak like 6 languages fluently and a dozen others in simple conversation (NERD ALERT)

he sucks so hard at writing essays but is (for some reason) really good at maths

despite being the more serious one among his group of friends, tabis a dumbass and does a lot more stupid things than one would expect

[mcflymemes]

THE HANGOVER PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the 2009 film

it says here we should work in teams.

why don't we remember a goddamn thing from last night?

you're in for a real treat today.

i see guys like you in here every fucking day.

you found the car?

i just wish your friends were as mature as you.

i'm thinking about getting my bartender's license.

you're such a bad person.

you're actually gonna wear that, or are you just fucking with me?

by the way, we're all gonna die.

at least our trip wasn't a total loss.

hey, what's that on your arm?

would you shut up and drive before any of these nerds asks me another question?

this does not seem fair.

do i have any volunteers?

watch it, pervert!

that's not a purse. that's a satchel!

we had a great fucking time.

you're not really wearing that, are you?

we all do dumb shit when we're all fucked up.

why are you peppering the steak?

no chance. cash only.

what the fuck happened last night?

am i missing a tooth?

who does shit like that?

we're not even going to be in the room.

you just have to get to know them better.

this is my favorite part coming up now.

we don't want to call attention to ourselves.

you guys ready to let the dogs out?

it's no big deal.

we call this place "loserville."

you cool with that?

it's where i keep all my things.

trust me, it's not worth the fight.

your language is offensive.

don't let the beard fool you. he's a child.

what're you talking about?

indiana jones wears one.

you are a fucking moron.

you're an idiot.

where the hell are you? i'm freaking out.

let's go, handsome.

i don't think you should be doing too much gambling tonight.

it hurts too much.

i'm not cool with that.

now, it's real simple.

whatever happens tonight, i will never, ever, ever speak a word of it.

listen... uh. we fucked up.

are you sure you're qualified to be taking care of the baby?

who said anything about gambling?

pull yourself together, bro.

suck my dick.

all you got to do is point, aim, and shoot.

why would you go to las vegas?

you don't know for sure?

things got out of control.

i should have been a fucking cop.

seriously. i don't care what happens. i don't care if we kill someone.

i feel weird having to ask you twice.

can i ask you another question?

it's at the corner of get a map and fuck off.

you can do this. just focus.

that's not what you do.

i'm pretty sure that's illegal.

we're getting married in five hours.

if it's what i think it is, it's a big fucking mistake.

i can't afford to lose somebody close to me again.

this isn't the real caesar's palace is it?

i keep forgetting about the goddamn tiger.

it's not gambling when you know you're gonna win.

it's not illegal.

whose fucking baby is that?

you heard me!

i'm on your side!

yeah... that's not gonna happen.

i'm sick of doing what you want me to do all the time.

i shouldn't be here.

where'd you get that cop car from?

boy, you've got a sweet ride there.

don't listen to this maniac.

we're shit out of luck.

how's my hair?

it was a real pleasure meeting you.

what if he got out?

you are literally too stupid to insult.

there's a phone in your room.

oh, how cute.

do me a favor. don't text me. it's gay.

whatever this is ain't working for me.

you might not know this, but i consider myself a bit of a loner.

wait a second. could it be?

i stand corrected.

are you nuts?

i don't know you. you do not exist.

would you please put some pants on?

i hate godzilla! i hate him too!

that was once, and i was out of line.

this isn't your fault.

i'll get you some pants.

remember, what happens in vegas stays in vegas.

right in the nuts!

don't touch it. don't even look at it.

i say we delete it right now.

did you have to park so close?

i met you like four times.

that was beautiful! well done!

i'll hit an old man in public.

i want to find out how i went to the hospital.

we're going to be okay.

that's highly unlikely.

[bebobeboben]

Hi! @ligiawrites, I'm the anon who asked about the story a few days ago. sorry it's taken so long I got shy and didn't want to post it😭😭

(disclaimer: I haven't played the game in a while so forgive me for any ooc behaviour and/or canon divergence)

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

“We cannot be together, My Liege. You are to be King, and I am nothing more than a Knight from a simple bourgeoisie. I am your servant.”

“But Adicia...”

“Mathias.”

He looks shocked. Why won't he understand what I'm saying is for his own good. A King and a Knight...

We would have never worked.

“We may have spent a night together all those years ago, yes, but that does not mean my feelings for you now are the same as then.”

I step forward and peered into his eyes when I realised, he was drunk.

His face was flushed; his pupils blown. All the emotions he had bottled up had spilt. I should've realised; we had done so well in avoiding talking about this, it was obvious that one of us would be inebriated when we finally had this conversation.

It mattered not what I said from here on out, it would all be forgotten. Hazy memories from a drunken dream. He would not believe it real, even if I had mentioned it. He has had plenty of dreams about me, he had told me as such.

I reached out to cup his face with one of my hands. He relaxed at my touch, much unlike how he reacts without the help of alcohol,

“I care for you, Mathias. I really do. But we can't ever be together. As I said before, you are the next King. You're to be coronated tomorrow. Neither of us need the consequences of a relationship at mind. What would the nobles of high society think? What would your mother think?”

He looks uncertain. He stays quiet, in the dark I'm not sure if he’s fallen asleep in my hands or merely contemplating what I've said .

“Mathias.”

“I, I don't care what the nobles think. Or what mother thinks! I love you Adicia! More than anything. A world without being with you is not a world worth living for.”

I've noticed that on the occasions he gets drunk, he always has a flare for theatrics.

“I'll always be with you Mathias, just... not in the sense you're hoping. One day you will be betrothed to someone beautiful, someone who can help you rule, and you'll forget all about the feelings you have for me. You and I will simply be a fleeting memory.”

“I could never forget you Adicia. I'll find a way for us to be together. Just wait. When I'm King nobody will dare to say a word against me.”

I smile, whenever he puts his mind to something, it's always been hard to sway him.

We draw closer the fire crackling being the only sound in the room apart from our breathing. He puts his hands on my waist and pulls me flush against him. My heavy metal armour pressing against the soft fabric of his clothes. I wonder if it hurts. The hand I left on his cheek moves upwards and becomes entangled in his long hair. He moves his face forward just centimetres away from mine and I can feel his breath on my face. He draws closer still. I wonder if he understands the complications of what would happen if people found out about this. About us.

And even with all the protesting I had done earlier, I wished for this with every fibre of my being.

Our lips finally touch, and its soft.

So soft, I could barely feel it against my lips. I want more. I want to kiss him harder, to replicate that night, all those years ago.

But we can’t. I pull away from him. He’s confused. A sad smile plays at my lips.

“Good night, Mathias,” I tuck a strand of hair behind his ear, “You need to be well rested for tomorrow.”

With that I turn and head for the hidden door leading to my chambers. The last thing I see before heading into my room his is face. A mixture of hurt, and betrayal. It seems he thought our feelings were mutual. That we would both do anything for us to be together.

I stare at him for a moment before fixing my expression into the one I always wear around him. One of indifference. As if I don't care about him. When it's in fact the opposite. Once again, he looks shocked.

I finally head into my chambers and close the door. How I feel about him now doesn't matter. Because tomorrow we will go back to playing our roles. His, the Crown Prince of Opala, and mine, the outcast knight.

Tomorrow we will act as though this never happened. We will act as though we didn’t confess our love. Act as though we didn't kiss. As though we never shared a night together. As though the feelings between us don't exist. Just as we had always done.

But can we keep it up much longer? He knows now that I truly love him too. But will he act on it, is the question. He knows he is to be King, and he knows what the consequences of our relationship would be.

Before we were King and Knight, we were Prince and Whipping boy.

Whipping boy. It mattered not that I was a woman. I wasn’t a proper noble by anyone’s standards.

To be in a relationship with him would cause this country’s faith in him to crumble. It was already weak, given that we had only just won the war against Topazio by the skin of our teeth.

A King with a country that didn’t love him? I would not let that happen. I had promised the Queen after all. But I had also promised her that I would remember one thing; to keep the boundaries between me and Mathias in place. After all she had done for me, how could I refuse? She knew of our feelings and yet she said that anyway.

If it was for the sake of my Kingdom, I would do anything. But it makes me wonder, for the sake of Mathias, what wouldn’t I do? This is why I will close my heart off. To him, to the Queen, to everyone. Closing my heart to him is the only way Mathias can grow into a good King for his country. I would only hinder him.

Perhaps once he becomes King, I will leave. My current status could never make up for my sins. Knight Valência would make a better Dragon Commander than I. A better bodyguard too.

I can hear thumps and crashes coming from Mathias’s room. He is either being attacked, or, in his drunken state, fumbling around in the dark. It makes me smile, to think of My Prince stumbling in the dark like a fool. It all stops, and soft snores begin to be heard.

Waiting a few moments to confirm he is asleep; I begin to remove the heavy armour. Placing it on its wooden stand. It feels as though a literal weight is being lifted off my shoulders. Although the real weight I carry will never be lifted. I place my sword beside my bedside and climb into bed. It would take a while for sleep to truly set in. I must not allow my feelings to take control of me, as they just had. It could jeopardise the safety of My Liege and those surrounding us.

I dream again that night, one of many. I dream of Mathias, of what we are and what we could’ve been. I dream of my family, something I had not done in a long time. I dream of Mandra- Mandreis. Of what happened that day. How they reacted to what happened, and how I wish I did things differently.

There were many things as to which I was uncertain after our confrontation, but there was one thing I was certain for: no matter what, I would do what was necessary for my country and My Prince- no, My King. Whether it be staying with him for the rest of my days or leaving without a trace.

Before myself, My Liege would always come first. Which is why we can never be together.

I close my eyes and once again succumb to sleep's warm embrace.

[wannaseewhatshangin]

tex being jealous after he suspects you have a crush on a rich guy in town... like he's not only angry but sad too cause he realizes he could never offer you what Mr. rich guy has to "offer" you --- headcanons please ;)

Oh me oh my. I LOVE THIS! GOLD STAR FOR YOU DARLING!

I hope you don't mind but I made the hcs where y'all are friends. (Fem reader, as I said in my last post that I was going to write mostly Fem reader because it's easier for me to write and it gives me more practice, instead of accidentally putting "She" instead of "They" or "He" because as I said, I'm used to writing Fem readers)

So let's get one thing out of the way.

You have been friends with Tex and Johnny since you moved schools, which was back in 3rd grade.

Johnny has always known about Tex's little "Crush" on you.

Tex thinks it's not obvious and thinks nobody can see it when he looks at you. And he also thinks it's just a "Small" crush.

But trust me, that boy has no idea that you have him wrapped around your little finger.

There is a boy in your class, he comes from a rich family and he's very friendly, you occasionally talk to him.

He VERY funny- well obviously not as funny as your two best friends. But funny enough to make you laugh.

All Tex could do was sit and watch as he made you smile and laugh. He was supposed to be the one making you smile. He loved your smile and he didn't want to share it with Big Dollars over there. He didn't crack a single joke during class.

Which did not go unnoticed by Johnny.

"Hey what's wrong buddy, you didn't make a fire today or anything." He said, leaning over his buddy's shoulder.

He looked towards you and "Mr. loverman", frowning as he wanted to cry.

He was angry, not at you. He could never be angry with you. But he was angry with your new rich friend and how much you liked him.

"Oh. Hey I'm sorry, man. Hey- it's alright though, she wouldn't leave us for him and you know it. Have some faith in our friend." He said, patting his back.

It was the end of school and he patiently waited on you by the class door.

You walked to him, along with Johnny, starting to walk with them.

You smiled at him, but he didn't smile back.

You looked at Johnny, as if asking him what was wrong with Tex.

"Thats all you, I'll see you chicks later." He said, walking off into the distance.

Your friend walked up behind you, scaring you before you started smiling.

"Hey Darling."

Tex almost snapped right there.

Tex always called you darling and he wasn't gonna watch some guy with big pockets come crashing in and calling you his sweet names.

The guy walked away and Tex looked at you.

"I thought you were MY darling" his voice cracked a little.

You just looked at him, your lips parted in shock at his little outburst.

"W-..What do you mean? Of course I am. Tex what is with you." You asked, rubbing his arm gently.

He just looked at you, eyes tearing up slightly.

After all, he has always been sensitive and never could keep his emotions covered up, unlike his brother.

And he felt ashamed.

All he could think about was how pathetic he felt, not being able to put beautiful diamonds and gold into your hands in just a snap.

He couldn't help but feel like he wasn't good enough and he wasn't ever gonna be yours.

"Well, I mean it's kinda obvious that I'm no match for Mr rich guy. If he makes you happy then it's okay."

He looked down at his feet, not wanting to meet your eyes.

He felt weak, not being able to give you anything you've ever wanted.

All he ever wanted to do was make you happy but Mr Big lots beat him to it.

"Tex.. Are you..jealous?" You smiled slightly.

His face turned a harsh red.

"No- Im not. I'm just..." He couldn't finish his own sentence.

"Texas." You said, throwing your arms around his neck.

His face is close to a red light.

"Has anyone ever told you about my little Crush on you?" You ask, smirking as you ran your hands through his hair.

"What?" He question, very shocked at your words.

"Texas McCormick. You are everything a lady could ever want. You're sweet, handsome. And I hope you know, that I have no interest what so ever in him." You said, finishing your sentence by pressing a kiss to him lips, which he kisses back immediately.

[musical-chick-13]

who is your favorite iteration of the doctor to be shipped with river?

I thought a lot about my answer to this, and unfortunately I am going to give the BIGGEST cop-out of a response and say that I can't actually choose between Eleven and Twelve 😭😭

Just for the sake of having an answer, I'll say Twelve, just because he's my favorite Doctor. (And as much as I love it when characters are so broken up about losing people they love that they can't even talk about it--i.e. series 7 Eleven--I do very much appreciate the fact that we got to see Twelve actually consistently grieve onscreen. Also don't TALK to me about how the specific type of goodness he was able to successfully impart to Missy-about helping someone even when there's little to no chance of it succeeding, of getting anything good out of it for yourself, or of the other person ever knowing about it-CAME DIRECTLY FROM RIVER.)

But I really don't have like. A Specific Preference. I skew more toward the Doctors we've seen River interact with onscreen (and specifically during the Moffat Era because as everyone knows it's my favorite, lol), but I've really liked the fic I've read of her with Eight, and some of the stuff in the supplementary materials has gotten me to come around on her with Ten as well (I am notably not a Particularly Huge Fan of Ten). And I also even wrote a story once about her and Thirteen (that I then orphaned later for very stupid reasons). (It's here, if anyone's interested.)

All this being said, I wouldn't have fallen in love with this ship as much as I have if Eleven/River didn't exist. Twelve/River sees them both finally on the same page, and the whole "HE WOULDN'T BE IN LOVE ENOUGH TO BE STANDING [IN DANGER] WITH ME (*has actually been in the middle of said danger the entire time because he is in love enough*) was...look, that CHANGED MY BRAIN. PERMANENTLY. But I don't think people appreciate how truly DERANGED Eleven and River are.

She insults him/makes him look stupid and he just goes like this -> 😍. He starts accepting his interest in her WHEN HE LEARNS SHE'S IN PRISON FOR MURDER (probably for murdering him). They get so caught up in flirting (over River being A Scary Person specifically) that they completely forget that their best friend/family member is in the room with them and also in extreme danger. She expresses her affection by shooting his ridiculous hats off of his head. "Are you married/are you asking/yes." (*cue the most charmed expression on his face to ever exist*) "It's a shame you were busy that day" (<-because she had POISONED HIM AND HE WAS DYING). "And unlike me, she really doesn't mind shooting people, I shouldn't like that, kind of do a bit." "You graffiti-ed the oldest cliff face in the universe!"/"Well you wOuLdN't aNsWeR yOuR pHoNe." "You've got that face on again"/"What face?"/"The 'he's hot when he's clever' face"/"This is my normal face"/"Yes it is." "I do NOT sneak out at night to parties with RIVER SONG"/"How is she?"/"Fine. 😊"

His response to someone bringing her up and mentioning that she tried to kill him is "totally married her XD." She confessed her love to him via "getting the whole universe to mention how much they need him and agreed to marry him and he's still like, "Oh, gotta go check my fucking hair before I say hello to her again" in TATM. (Fun fact, the "Sorry honey, traffic was hell" line was originally, "Traffic was a bitch" which would have been the like. Highest-level curse word we've ever seen this man say, and it would have been in the context of trying to cleverly greet River which AGAIN, DERANGED BEHAVIOR.)

Fixed point that would destroy the universe if it were messed with? Too bad! Not if she thinks she has to kill him! "I'LL SUFFER IF I HAVE TO KILL YOU, MORE THAN EVERY LIVING THING IN THE UNIVERSE" OH MY GOOOODDDDDDDDD. (<-Worth noting that he calls her out over this for all of about two minutes before deciding the best way out of the situation is having an impromptu wedding.) She tells him TO HIS FACE "When I was little, I wanted to marry you" and then ALMOST INTENTIONALLY PERMANENTLY KILLS HIM LIKE TWO MINUTES LATER. He's dying on the floor in Berlin and still has the energy to go absolutely FERAL over the idea of someone hurting her. In the series 7 finale, she isn't even tangible and only exists through a conduit in Clara's head and he goes, "Too bad! I can hold you and kiss you and talk with you because I miss you, screw the actual laws of physics." (And then he's like, "Hmm, I probably look stupid right now. Oh well, back to talking to my wife, who I refused to say goodbye to for God Knows How Long because I would have been too sad.")

HE FALLS FOR HER POISONING GAMBIT BECAUSE HE'S HAVING TOO MUCH FUN FLIRTING WITH HER.

DUDE.

(Like, Twelve is also Deranged™ about her too, as evidenced by responding to her threat of cutting out his organs in alphabetical order with, "Which alphabet" and being jealous at the MOST inopportune times and, while in the middle of them fighting over who gets to risk sacrificing themselves, saying, "NOT ONE LIVING THING IS WORTH YOU" which is. Sure a line!!! That sure lives in my head rent-free!!!!! Also they have a Bonding Moment™ about carrying a severed head around in a bag. But the absolute INSANITY that goes on between River and Eleven is. Incredible.)

.........uhhhhh this. This got away from me. I also didn't really answer your question. Sorry? (<-Not actually sorry.)

[swanimagines]

hi jenni! thank you so much for all of your writing, it's so good! i would love it if i could please get a romantic self ship for a drabble or oneshot, whatever your preference, with cato from the hunger games?

my name is lisa and i go by she/her pronouns! i have medium brown hair that goes a little bit past my shoulders, light brown eyes, and dark eyelashes. i am an entj because i get very focused on school/making sure i put 100% into any task in front of me. i paint, draw, spend a lot of time outdoors, write, and am social on varying degrees- i talk too much with people i know but not a whole lot with strangers. i think i'd consider myself to be ambitious, too. i pride myself on getting to know people well enough that i know how to phrase the smallest sentence so that it'll make them laugh.

a few things i cannot stand: people who send me writing requests with literally nothing to go off of (your remark about people sometimes treating writers like a machine is so on point!), slow walkers, people who litter, and arugula. why is it in salads there's no point??

ok i think that was a little too much lol but i can't wait!! thank you again! 🥰

(Ships are closed and it's unlikely I will ever do them again especially now when I'm no longer a Tumblr writer, this event was held only for my friends in December 2021)

I read this over a few times during writing (SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG ARGH, I'm finally doing these as I'm preparing to wrap things up) and ALWAYS read "arugula" as "tarantula" and I was where the fuck do you live if tarantula salads are a common thing 😅 But I've heard many people don't like it, there's this 50's American diner styled restaurant in our northern neighboring city, and they put aragula in a lot of dishes, like on top of a nacho platter if you order it as a main course, I don't mind it but I understand why many do. Our cook here often puts nettle leaves in salads during summers, some of my Tumblr friends have been horrified by it before 😂

Also, I wanted to spend a moment to tell you how you're one of those people who kept me standing when I felt like I want to quit because of trolls and hate I got, or when things first started going south. You're an amazing person Lisa, and I'm sad to know that my time in the community might start to be up because it means I have to leave so many amazing people behind, like you. I have felt like this for a long time, over a year already, with some moments where I feel like I don't want to leave because accepting that I have to leave people behind hurts so much, to get rid of bad leaves I have to cut out some good leaves too. But during the time when I was part of the community, you were one of those people who grew to be important to me, whose comments I cherished, who I loved interacting with. I miss that time and I know I will miss it 5 years from now, when everything was still well. You will stay in my memories as one of those who supported me when I was feeling grim or like I can't write. Your comments were often simple and you didn't even say anything about the quality of my writing, like you commented "when will this be me? that's the goal babes." into one of my Kaz fics, and they still made me smile and feel good about myself and my writing/my effort to make people smile with my content. I do miss the interaction and the little community we had all that time ago, every time I publish something in AO3.

I hope you will stay in this community for a long time or if you ever decide to leave, you won't deactivate. I will surely visit your blog time to time, just to remember you, even if I won't be logged in. Reading our old asks and remembering how fun I had interacting with you. Or maybe someday I'll log back in and hit you with a message, who knows. I'll definitely pop by to tell you about meeting Freddy (+ Kit, Amita, Jessie, Archie and Dean) at least when I've come back from London in March and maybe send you pictures and videos from there.

But I want to thank you for being there and being such a good friend, the community is lucky to have you <3

Whoever first thought that the Hunger Games were a good idea to cope with lack of entertainment was a psychopath. Or no, anyone who thought it's good entertainment was a psychopath. Or a sociopath. To have bloodthirsty teenagers run across the forest killing each other was something Lisa had never understood - yet here she was, fighting off a girl who had found the little nest Lisa had built for an hour. She thought she had been good at camouflaging it, and she had maybe been too confident in herself as now she had a spear sticking through the side of her adobmen and a girl straddling her, trying to shove a knife into her throat.

Lisa flailed pathetically and the girl laughed. "You know, it's a pity to kill you. You could have become a famous author."

Splendid, one of Lisa's readers was about to kill her.

"It's a pity you will never read them once I do," Lisa hissed back and managed to kick the girl before scrambling backward, jerking her own knife out of her bag and throwing the cover aside. The girl rolled back before locking eyes with Lisa again. She eyed her own knife for a moment, and then at Lisa's knife. They both stood there for a moment, ready to fight, but then the girl lowered her knife. She clenched her jaw.

"You're lucky my knife isn't sharp enough to kill you at one go. I was unlucky when picking weapons. I mean, you'd think they provided us with new, sharpened ones," she said quietly and her eyes flickered at the spear sticking out on Lisa's side. "But if I'm lucky, that will kill you. Maybe maggots will nest there and you die by infection."

She took some steps backward, and then turned away, running into the night. Lisa groaned as the adrenaline started to fade and pain started to kick in.

"Motherfucker..." Lisa mumbled, looking at the spear. It hadn't gone through her, which made her curse even more. She definitely wouldn't be able to push the spear all the way through her body so she'd be able to snap it and pull it out to bandage it. She could try, and risk getting paralyzed in the process. Leaving it there, on the other hand, would lead to an infection. Either way, her game was over.

Lisa scoffed - authors rarely got killed by their readers. Lisa knew it wasn't personal, that girl had likely forced herself to be cold towards others for survival. She likely had a loving family, friends who prayed she'd make it home, that she'd win the Games. She did it for them. But the spear still didn't hurt any less.

Then, Lisa heard steps approaching her little tent. Rustle as a pair of feet hit the leaf-covered forest floor. She didn't even try to hide, if it was someone, they would likely be able to kill her in a heartbeat. So she waited, a moment, two. A shadow appeared to the doorway, and a figure crouched.

"Well, well, well. Someone else got the cutie before I could?" a voice said, that arrogant voice belonging to a guy Lisa had sparred with before the Games. They had had a flirting session, which felt kind of awkward now - she had called him cute too, and he had gotten visibly flustered.

"Cato," Lisa greeted the boy, rolling her eyes as he invited himself to step into Lisa's space. "Please, come in."

Cato's eyes flickered from her to her makeshift bed, to a few weapons Lisa had acquired. "Nice place. Nicer than mine, at least."

Lisa cocked an eyebrow. "I thought you formed a gang of some kind, where did you leave them?"

Cato sighed and scoffed. "Sleeping. I heard a noise coming from here and wanted to come and see what's happening and if I can join the fun."

Lisa looked at her wound and shrugged. "Well, my game is over. So, if you want to put me out of my misery..."

Cato scoffed, taking a hold of the spear and Lisa hissed at the feeling. "I did say that I wouldn't want a cutie like you dying among the first ones."

Then, a sickening crunch was heard and Lisa cried out, feeling blood gushing out of her backside. She felt some pressure a moment longer, before she saw Cato holding some bloody stick in his hand. It took her a moment to realise that the spear had disappeared, but blood was now gushing out of her adobmen. She quickly took a roll of bandage and started unwrapping it and wrapped it around herself and securing it with a pin.

She then looked up at Cato, searching his face. "You saved me."

Cato smirked, tucking a strand of Lisa's hair behind her ear. "Hunger Games is about dying in a fight. Someone has to see the life disappearing from your eyes as they twist a knife into your heart. It isn't entertainment if we all die by infections."

Lisa narrowed her eyes at him, trying to ignore the fact how tenderly he just touched her. "So you accept it as a form of entertainment?"

Cato hummed. "It's not like we have a choice. We are their entertainment, whether we want it or not. They're watching us right now, speculating if we'll be the tragic love story this season."

Lisa almost choked in her spit. "Love story? Us?"

Cato licked his lips, his smirk still on his face. "I just saved your life. We sit here peacefully, we aren't threatening each other. They probably think we're about to marry each other by now."

Lisa raised her eyebrows at him again, but then scooted away from him. "Well, when we meet the next time, those speculations will die."

Cato shrugged, standing up and started to back away towards the doorway. "Or then they won't. See, I'm not planning to be the one who kills you, unless you try to kill me."

With that, he disappeared into the night, leaving Lisa wondering what would happen within the next days - if Cato really meant what he said or if he just tried to manipulate her. If he was just trying to get close to strike when she least expected it.

But, a voice in her head said, maybe he was being genuine. Did Lisa's little flirting with him really do that, him going almost soft? What would happen if only the two of them would be left standing, would he kill her then? Or did he think she gets killed without it being him?

Lisa reclined on her makeshift bed, staring at the roof for a moment longer before letting herself to have a moment of rest before the next day - maybe she'd attempt to find Cato and manage to clear things some more.

[pen-guin-writez]

Okay I'm kinda in need of a comfort fic rn so like-. Can I request a Dunnstock or SQUIP x a reader who has anxiety?

HI CORIII OH NOES ARE YOU FEELING DOWN HERE LEMME SUPPLY YOU I CAN DO BOTH ~~~

Martha Dunnstock

(Y/N POV)

October 1st, 1989--- Dear Diary,

Being unnoticeable to the entirety of high school isn't so bad anymore. I don't have anyone to bother me when I'm at lunch, I get to do my own thing without people laughing at me, it's all super cool! Is what I would've said before today. My life has changed, Diary.

If people did ever notice me, I probably would be dead where I stand. But today, someone did notice me. It was freaky. I was sitting by myself at lunch, (as usual) when an overweight (not saying that it's bad) brown-haired girl asked me a question. The question that changed my life.

"Is this seat taken?"

Okay, maybe I make it a tad bit dramatic? But I was really surprised! No one ever talks to me, and this girl just did. I was so excited. "No, you can sit here. I really don't mind."

"Thanks, no one really lets me sit anywhere. Except for Veronica, but she's out sick today, so I didn't really have a planned sitting destination!"

Veronica. She's one of the Heathers, isn't she? I vaguely remember hearing about her. Veronica renamed the Heathers to "The Seventeens", since she's the new leader.

There are four members, There's, of course, Veronica Sawyer. The queen bee. It used to be someone else. Heather Chandler. But she commited suicide by drinking drain cleaner. At least what I heard from Jenna Rolan, the gossip girl here. Veronica's pretty chill, she lets anyone sit at her table, unlike Chandler. You only get banned from her table if each and every Seventeen is in agreement that you are causing problems. I'd love to be Veronica's friend, but I'm too scared that she might think I'm weird.

Heather Duke, shy bookworm. I heard she took over Heather Chandler's spot before Veronica did. I heard she used to be super rude, and almost convinced a Seventeen Member to committing Suicide. But when the Seventeens revamped, she became quieter, and more pleasant to be around. I've tried to talk to her a few times in the hallway but got too scared and ran away

Heather McNamara! She's like a little puppy dog. Probably the easiest Seventeen to befriend. She's so sweet, but I feel my stomach sink whenever I try to talk to a Seventeen. God, why can't I just do it? We're almost graduating and I still haven't talked to a single Seventeen.

And The Final Seventeen is Martha Dunnstock. I've never actually seen Martha in person but I heard she's super nice, and she had a crush on Ram Sweeney. But I don't even know who she is. Sigh.

"..You sit with the Seventeens?" Oh my god. Did that sound offensive? Just because she sits with Veronica doesn't mean she sits with all of the Seventeens! Oh no, she probably thinks I'm a weirdo now!

"Oh, yeah! I am a Seventeen, after all. I'm Martha. Martha Dunnstock. You?" MARTHA DUNNSTOCK?!

I was so surprised, Diary.

"Oh... I'm Y/N, nice to meet you..!" "..." "Can I be honest with you, Martha?"

"Of course!" "Well... I always get this feeling when I see a Seventeen. Like.. I can't move. And if I ever try to talk to one, they'll think I'm weird. But here you are! You... used to be one of the weirdos and now you're a Seventeen. I could never be friends with one of you." I sighed. It felt really good to spill my guts out. But to my surprise? She smiles!

"Y/N, I may not really know you, much. But I can tell we'll be great friends in the future. You seem like a really sweet person, despite any of your flaws. I'll see if Veronica will let you join The Seventeens. She probably will, she's really sweet."

Those words melted my heart. Martha was nice enough to help me join the Seventeens. That wasn't so hard after all!

"Thank you so much, Martha!" Does she want more of a response than that?? I'm scared oh please he-

"Anything for a new friend."

That'll do, Y/N, that'll do.

SQUIP

(3rd POV)

The SQUIP was out to seek its first ever host. Right before Jeremy, The SQUIP had another host for a few months.

This host is named Y/N L/N. They are an anxious, insecure junior that wanted to fit in with everyone. They didn't have any friends, and yearned to know what life was like if they were popular.

"Y/N L/N. Welcome to your Super Quantum Intel Processor. Your SQUIP." The SQUIP was expecting a host just like Y/N. Most teenagers that took the SQUIP were just like them.

"SQUIP, I want you to make me popular!" So it was popularity they sought? "Popular? I can do that. There are a few steps we must commit to first. You need to trust me and the process though. Are you ready?"

"Anything, SQUIP!

~~~

Now Y/N was in a better place than they were before. Everyone liked them, they had a beautiful partner, and they have great grades.

"Thanks, SQUIP! Now I can just take the Mountain Dew Red, since I don't need you anymore, right?" Foolish little Y/N...

They can't just get rid of the SQUIP. There is much work to do. Not just in Y/N's brain, but in her classmates...

"No, Y/N. I have a plan. We have to help your classmates achieve their goals. Go through Rich's locker. I know the combination. Trust me."

~~~

Rich found out that Y/N was going through his locker and punched them in front of everyone. They were the laughing stock of highschool.

"Y/N-"

"I'm taking the Mountain Dew Red." Not a word was said after that. They purchased the Mountain Dew Red and headed home.

"Just a word?"

"What. Is. It?"

"I know you're still insecure about what people think about you. And now look at where you stand with me, and where you stood before you got me. You may be hated now, but tomorrow is a new day. You can fix this. We can fix this."

The SQUIP wanted the best for Y/N. And though it had weird ways of doing it, they have to trust the process.

"..." "But SQUIP, what if they tease me tomorrow?"

"We'll show them. We'll make a difference, rebuild relationships, and they'll see the true Y/N L/N."

Y/N smiled at this. They could tell this was coming from the heart of a SQUiP.

"Let's show them, then."

[ofglories]

*the door creaks open

|| I’ll try to keep this brief, because there’s a LOT of characters I interact with. I’ll hit the important ones:

Arthur - He’s… so sweet. Like a puppy. I want to ruffle his hair and pinch his cheeks. You hit the good notes wherein he’s following his own principles, and still shadowed by the past actions of his father. I’d like to see more of his insecurity or uncertainty, but you’ve got such a firm grasp on his character that it’s fine. Merlin adores him in all the AUs, and his desire to make Merlin happy by any means necessary is v. endearing.

Emrys - No joke, legit thought Emrys was an actual, canon character. It wasn’t until talking to a friend that I was like ‘Oh… he’s an OC?!’ You carry his character really well, molded and threaded into the story as if he was a genuine person from legend – you had me fooled! Merlin can’t say anything though, he’s biased therefore his ( correct ) opinion is irrelevant. I am so desperate to see him react to Uther and everything he’s done ( even if it would never happen ).

Uther - You ever met a man you hate? Not even beloathe but straight up hate? Look no more, Uther is here. The way you keep the tyrannical side just on the side of believable without leaning too far into cartoonishly evil is certainly commendable, tbh. I’d like to see if there’s something – a material possession, a person, something that would make that side of him crack, but it seems unlikely. ( Merlin isn’t available for comment. We know how he feels on the matter. )

Taliesin - I WANNA KNOW HIM MOREEEEE. God I love everything about Taliesin and I perk up every time I see him cross my dash. Such a cryptic and delightful bard. He gives me a “whimsical but can still kick your ass while being pretty about it” vibe and I want to scooch Merlin more towards him at some point bc I wanna see what happens 👀

|| How's my portrayal? ; accepting!!

Aaaaaaaaaaa thank you so much!

I'm honestly so glad to hear this and don't worry I do have Plans to explore more of Arthur's insecurities and uncertainties, and not just with Althur as the catalyst. There's a lot to explore with him that I haven't yet because he's genuinely deeply wounded by events in his life that affect him both as a Servant and as a living person that I can't wait to explore more. I'm definitely biased because, much like a certain OC of mine, I grew up with King Arthur stories and he's my favorite boy in Fate because of it so I try so hard to do him justice. He's very sweet, but also has a mischievous and recklessly stubborn side too that I'll have to dig into more.

Emrys is so much fun for me so I'm glad you like him! It was a challenge for myself when I first made him to take someone with so little information and presence in the legends as Ambrosius Aurelianus and flesh him out into a proper character, so I'm genuinely happy you say I've done well enough for him to properly feel like he belongs since he's really only mentioned by Geoffrey of Monmouth like...three times. Eventually he's going to have to face the facts of what Uther did and there will be an Event with that.

God, you have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that about Uther. He's a muse I'm deeply insecure with since I don't really write villains but I wanted him to be a believable evil tyrant. Someone who does terrible things without leaning into cartoonish steals candy from babies territory. He's a self-absorbed, self-obsessed violent jackass and is entirely unrepentant about it. I do wonder that too, though I have some personal doubt from my own admitted bias against him dkjfbjmhs

Oh my god thank you!! Taliesin is such a fascinating figure since he's simultaneously fictional and real so I worked hard to make him the way he is. You should absolutely throw Merlin at him more, Taliesin welcomes new students and he'd definitely view Merlin as one! He's an old man even with his pretty and youthful features-

[whumpitlikeyoumeanit]

Whumpuary 7

Whumpuary prompts should theoretically make up one cohesive narrative, though I'm not currently putting in the effort to flesh out the story around the prompts just yet. I have good intentions to do so eventually. Masterlist. Oh yeah and they're totally out of order, chronologically.

((content warnings: mention of torture ))

promptspiration: @whumpuary 07: Drugged

Whumpee: Draco Malfoy Whumper: Voldemort whump type: comfort fic type: Deathly Hallows "Voldemort learns Draco hooked up with Harry" AU

Snape and Narcissa caretakers while Draco's still a prisoner.

words: ~1000

-------------------

"My lord, eventually you are going to kill him." 

"Feeling sentimental, Severus?"

"Hardly." Snape's voice was dry. "Even as the dubious pleasure of minding students goes, a Malfoy is a special annoyance. But he is a useful tool against Potter, and Draco is not strong. Even the Cruciatus alone will eventually kill him. Sooner, if you keep letting Bellatrix at him."

"That's what I have you for." 

"I am not a healer." He sounded annoyed. "I'll do what I can." 

Draco was lifted into the air by a spell. He didn't resist it. He didn't know if they realised he was conscious and he thought he would prefer it if they did not. Maybe he wasn't, really. He felt very far away from his body, from the situation, like an observer. That was better. 

He was taken to his mother's parlour; even before he was laid on a sofa, he recognised it by the smell. This was where she had once arranged the flowers that dotted the house. They hadn't had flowers in years now, but still their ghosts lingered. 

Something was poured down his throat, vile and no doubt effective. His pain-tensed muscles began to relax and the ache eased. Snape was gentler than he had to be, holding his head in one hand and making sure he didn't choke. It wasn't really a surprise; ever since he saw how perfectly Snape hid the fact that he knew about him and Harry, he had realised that his words may just be just words, no matter how fiercely he seemed to believe them. He really was incredible. 

His mother's clipped steps hurried into the room. "Draco—" Snape moved aside and she took over, sitting with him and holding his head in her lap. He wished he could stay there forever. Her fingers brushed through his hair. 

"I've done what I can," Snape murmured. His voice was so low it seemed unlikely someone outside the room would even know there was talking going on inside. "You're allowed to tend to him?"

"Sometimes," she said icily. 

"When you are, give him this, as soon afterward as possible. It will impede the formation of the memories. Calming charms are tempting but try to avoid it if he's coherent; the long-term effects are unhealthy. He needs sleep—"

"I know this," she snapped, She was snappish from stress, not because Snape was doing anything wrong, but he was the closest thing to a safe person to take it out on. Draco wished he could make her feel better. Her hand gripped his shoulder tightly. "I need something to protect him—"

Snape cut her off. "There is nothing," he said harshly. "Nothing will provide any protection from the Dark Lord's punishments, that would not be obvious and make the situation worse. He will have to endure. This might make it easier to live with." 

She said nothing, but, in a few seconds, Draco felt her move and heard the touch of metal to glass, one of her rings coming into contact with the potion bottle as she accepted it. 

"Pain. Seized muscles." It sounded like he was going down a line of potions. He could sense the shifting of bottles. "Use them when necessary. I don't know when I'll be able to spare more."

"Sleep?"

"No. The demand is too high; Sleeping Draughts and several ingredients are in short supply. Blood-Replenishing."

"He won't need that." She sounded less like she knew that than that she couldn't believe otherwise.

Snape's voice was quiet but inarguable. "There is a mandate that he will be punished nightly, whether the Dark Lord is here or not." His mother's hands held him tight, but she couldn't make that not true. "Not everyone will continue to be entertained by mere pain. Keep it, and hope you're right.

"His mind is another matter. Draco." He didn't respond, willing Snape's attention to go away. "I know you're awake." It wasn't working. He shook his head infinitesimally and turned his face into his mother's stomach. She ran her fingers through his hair silently. That still seemed to be enough of an acknowledgement for Snape. "Practise your Occlumency."

"It doesn't work," he murmured.

"No," Snape agreed. "You will never be able to hide anything and I would discourage you from trying. I hope for all our sakes that you don't have something somehow worse that you need to — although at this point it seems nothing is beyond the scope of your ability to make bad decisions. But if you can maintain control of your mind, it may preserve your sanity." 

The 'for a time' went unspoken. Maybe it would keep his mind strong enough to take being dragged out in front of Him… every night…. for more torture, for no reason, nothing he could do to end it… Maybe it would. For a while. But if anyone made an effort to break him, he would break. If He lost control in his anger and didn't care if he stayed sane, he would break. Even if anyone became overzealous and went too hard, he could break… If it went on for too long with no end in sight, maybe then he would still break…

"All right," he said quietly. His mother held his head. 

"Give him a few drops of that. It's too late to do anything for tonight's session, but I don't need this conversation on display."

She stroked his hair and turned his head up, and dropped a small dose of a horribly sour potion into his mouth. He heard Snape's footsteps retreating from the room and put it out of his mind, hoping that everyone else would have forgotten about him and he'd be allowed to stay, for a few hours.

[yanderefairyangel]

Is Alear a coward ? part 2

4- Past Alear

Before I hear anything about Alear having lost their memory therefore it doesn't count, unlike Robin, Alear is still the same person as they were 1 000 ago, they still recall their name, their hair being still red is a proof that it's still part of their identity.

And you will see that when we compare Alear to their past self all the things I said weren't gaslighting but actual facts.

Past Alear is a broken person. They saw all their siblings died in awful ways and lost their mother at a young age. Them describing exactly how their sibling got killed means that they assisted powerless at their brother being drowned, their sister being burned, their younger siblings getting ripped appart by the Corrupted. They are physically 17, meaning they spent at least this much years trying to stay a alive and they speak like a child. While sounding emotionally broken. Saying that this version of Alear is unsettling is an understatement.

The problem with the English language is that it's harder to notice the difference in speeches compared to the japanese one, so they have to rely on different strategy. I already mentionned it in my Rafal post : as a compensation for the loss in translation of Rafal switching prounouns and speech, the english version have to make his speech sound more haughty. Same thing here. To show that Alear speaks like a child vs how they speak now, they have Alear tells how they feel without trying to put forms. What do I mean ? Well. When Alear talks with Past Alear, they are being incredibly straightforward and with the coldest delivery ever. They ask for the ring right away, telling them who they are, their dad, and saying I quote "Your answer must be yes. I cannot let you go with that ring. If I disobey Father...I will be killed". Or "Most were defects. Defect require disposal. But I am not a defect." Even when they describe their sibling death, we are just told about it in a dry, straighfoward way. This is completely different then how when Alear had to use metaphor to get their point across to how much they were scared. Another thing showing Past Alear's immature speech is their dialogue as they create an avalanche. "It worked. I'll keep doing what works." Or when they meet Lumera, they tell what they think without any filter, like young children. Or the way they justify not wanting to kill Lumera... as simple as that, she checked on them, and that was enough for them to feel hesistant in killing her while being scared and the fact that they are being so straightforward about that manages to shows that they speak like a child and at the same time, that they are completely emotioneless.

When Alear tried to communicate their feelings, they are using what I mentionned, using metaphor or speaking in way that makes their audience relate to what they evoke, like with Diamant in the C support. Past Alear doesn't even try to gain that from their audience, they speak things like it's in their mind, they tell the audience what happened and they use simple words to express how they feel. If Alear has to use images such as their blood runing cold seeing the Corrupted, Past Alear simply says "I hate them. They scare me. they are awful", like kids do, but it's so straighforward that it conveys their lack of emotion and the state of their broken mind. When Alear fight their double they say that they are jealous because they say what they feel out loud and shows it. Past Alear says what they think out loud but never show anything. This difference in their expression shows that Alear is more mature emotionaly but also stable. They are capable of emoting and communicatiing in a way that isn't unsettling. The opposite of past Alear's whose expression is oversimplistic. They say it in an almost robotic way and what would be considered clumsy expostion in another context seeing how they are openly speaking of their life and fear of dying in a context that would not fit, but here because it shows the emotional damage Sombron puts them throught, it compensate the loss of the effect produced by the use of hiragana and emphazise the Alear's robotic state.

However, Past Alear straighfowardness and dryness in the way they say things isn't only trying to restore the effect created by their use of hiragana in japanese lost in translation. It's also a way of showing to the audience how emotionally broken they are. They speaks of their dead siblings without hesistation compared to how Alear had problem articulating the sentence that Lumera passed away when asked by Queen Eve, compare their face too. Alear is looking down, Past Alear is looking right at us. They do show some signs of emotion with the mentions of the cute little siblings, the adjective showing affection of the said siblings, however it's delivered so straightfowardly it's almost as if they felt nothing when saying this. This is also showing what Past Alear says about them. That they don't think and are like the Corrupted. The fact that they aren't even capable of thinking of lying to Sombron is an evidence of that, they are just that obdient and therefore that broken.

Compared to how Alear has to use imaged language to have character understand how they feel, the way Past Alear's cue are written are unsettling but is also what makes us sympathetize as it translates their absolute broken state of mind. Alear uses expression that we almost use ourself in a trivial way without realizing that it allows to project more our audience into the feeling we were speaking about whereas Past Alear is so blunt that it is unatural. When we speak about our feelings we just don't say "I am sad" or "I am scared". We often rely on expression to shows the intensity of our feeling. The character in the game don't do that either. They use a language that is richer when it comes to image and expression. Past Alear doesn't have that at all. They tell the audience what happen and despite the vocabulary used, their blunt and dry delivery is showing how broken they are. (the emotinal damage is unreal)

Hence Past Alear isn't telling people what they are feeling unlike Alear, they are saying things like a robot regardless of who they are speaking to. They cannot show vulnerabilty and have no real person to confide in. They were able to tell Alear and Veyle that because Veyle is their sister and Past Alear is clearly envious of present Alear. They have friends that love them (the Royal and other random units with whom Past Alear's dialogue is "You are strong. You should be fighting besides me"), they are able to show weakness and gets comforted when they do, they are a "hero that saved the world" what Past Alear will end up wishing.

5- Comparing Alear's attitude to Veyle

Another thing that showed Alear's cowardice is definetely how drastically different their attitude is to Veyle's. Out of all children of Sombron, only Alear fears the Corrupted and I am not quoting the twins since they did not grew up with our dragon siblings, but only Veyle and you'll see why.

Veyle was shown multiple times fighting Corrupted all alone, by herself. She was also shown openly defying Sombron multiple times. In chapter 15, after the Alear drama, her encounter with Griss infers that she frenquently leave Gradlon seeking for you know who and that the Hounds had to make her go back to the temple. She even says I quote " I won't harm anyone even if it cost me my life". She openly defy a dragon Sombron at the risk of getting killed and even as he is using the rings, she literaly orders him to give it back to Alear.

In comparision past Alear was traumatized in so many way they are unable to emote or even to think straight. The fact that their siblings were killed before them implies that they assisted powerless to their death and therfore, they bear a guilt on that. When Veyle fight past Alear, they says that they would wish to stand by Veyle's side as a friend and an ally, therefore to not repeat the same scenario as their sibling they were unable to help but they can't because they are paralyzed by fear. Fear of death. Something that never scared Veyle since she openly defy Sombron and the Corrupted during the enitre game. Alear was incapable of that. Even when meeting Lumera they are indecise, conflicted by their fear of dying but not willing to kill the only person that has been kind to them for the first time in their entire life ever since their mother died. They said it, Alear is terrified of death, they just want to live and don't know what to do as the only way they found to stay alive was to obey Sombron to the letter. This means they also never considered fighting back the Corrupted due to their fear that in chapter 1 lead them to instantly think of runing away. (As you see, this one scene really hurted the whole Alear developpement). Compared to Veyle's bravery in defying Sombron openly and even fighting the Corrupted, Alear is defintely a coward and while you cannot blame them for being scared, nothing shows more this then the difference between two people who still had to go throught the same things.

Compared to how Veyle whose only way to be under's Sombron influence was when Zephia was messing with her dragonic pulse, Alear was under Sombron's influence because they were deadly afraid, and while Veyle still fought back against it, with her own body rejecting the personality Sombron made for her, Alear didn't, they were broken and did things, as told.

In short Alear's "cowardice" is a moral one. The fact they still did and commited terrible attrocities by fear of Sombron when their younger sister refused to. This also means that Alear was reduced to despair.

This also shows Alear's evolution in hindsight, something that is apparently considered not to be valid among fans even though écriture à rebours is a valid narrative form that rely heavily on using things in retrospective heck that's even the same strategy as flashback. Alear getting to see how they were 1 000 ago at a point where they became a comptent leader and even ended up becoming the hero claded in white with a shining sword that they dreamt to be upon the day they meet Lumera is showing how much Alear changed ever since that period. The little fell child scarred of death openly defied death thrice and even then never gave up, this is the one thing consistant with Alear, is that they want desperately to live, but as a Fell child, it lead them to commit crimes whereas as a Divine child it leaded them to overcome death itself (thrice).

However, seeing and learning the reason of Alear's fear of the Corrupted after seeing them having choosing to become one so that they could help their friends one last time is showing the extent of this actions and how much Alear's changed. I already pointed out how the game already showed this side of this character in the game throught the use of cutscene and dialogue, but this moment really showed the impact and you have no idea how much it hurts the story that it uses time travel rather then a dream like chapter to do that since chapter 24 hurts the story (not to the point of killing it but it does shows how clumsy it is) but fact is that it does shows Alear overcoming their fear. And when it comes to chapter 21, seeing Alear being so petrified that they could not help their sibling because they feared death and that they ended up risking their life to save Veyle also show them overcomming this fear of dying that prevented them from being there for their others siblings in order to help Veyle, the sibling they wished to help back in the past, they could not be her for her during 1 000 years and when they finally reunite after discovering their family ties, they sacrifice themselves to save her fufilling the wish Past Alear had 1 000 ago.

This also shows how Alear used to follow Sombron's ideology since they were stronger then our Alear them having strong stats due to them having to rely on strengh alone to survive and be performant to save themselves. Meeting Lumera gave them the courage to defy Sombron and the proved themself strong enough to defeat him alone, but they did it ALONE and this recklesness comes back in other chapter, notable 10 where Alear overestimated their strenght. In chapter 10, it costed them the Emblem and almost them and their allies life, and in the past, it would have cost them their life if Lumera did not saw them and took them with her. Must I remind you that Alear was alone then ? That in chapter 18, Sombron asked Zephia if she collected Alear's body ? Had Lumera not being there, Zephia could have arrived sooner to get rid of Alear's body and they wouldn't be there. This was a terrible idea. And this was the first time Alear defyed their father, and they did it alone. The second time was the final fight boss where Alear fights them together with their friends and sibling, not relying on strenght alone but on the strenght of their bonds after learning that they need their friends to success and that connections is real strenght, something that 1 000 ago they did not had despite connecting with Lumera. Xenologue Alear commiting the exact same mistake despite not being Sombon's child in this world shows this as well, that this is one of Alear's biggest flaw even if they are doing it for the sake of others. And it's not like self sacrifice isn't a flaw, just to quote Elliot Nightray :"All your 'self sacrifice' only pleases yourself! Have you ever saved anyone that way? All you want is protect yourself!"

5- Why erasing the French in Alear's name weakened Engage's symbolic.

Alear's jp name is the french word Lueur meaning glow and their entire storyline is how they are a light that ended up gaining intensity to shine brighter. This is visible in both Lumera and Sombron's dialogue towards Alear.

In chapter 25, when Lumera/Lumière tells us how her encounter with Alear was her salvation from loneliness as she dies she calls Lueur her light " 光", and Lumera's japanese name is Lumière, the french word for light/光 whereas Alear is Lueur the french word for glow of light which can be also said 光 or 輝き in japanese, hence going back with Alear glowing form as an Emblem, this means Alear really became light and this was what this journey was about.

In French, lueur is a faint light compared to Lumière who designed light itself in it's brightness and when we say that the light/lumière lost in intensity we say that it became a "lueur" whereas a light that gains in intensity goes from being a lueur/mere glow to become a light/lumière.

Whereas Sombron fighting them says calls Alear a a 灯, a light that is precised to be a faint light coming from a toarche hence the light weaking in front of the wind ready to blow on it in this contect, the "light before it goes out" which is why tomoshi become hikari, Sombron implies that by blowing on this faint light, it's like he is extingushing light period, but it also follows Alear journey from being a frail ray of light to a bright shining one, that the fragile glow survived the wind blowing on it. Alear was a Lueur trapped within Sombron's darkness, Alear was forced to repress themselves the light that radiated from them in order to survive. However, when they are with Lumera, they are able to fully be themselves , therefore fufill themselves and blossom into a glow shining brighlty and even becoming light. This also comes in play with how essential Alear's developpement and growth into a courageous being is.

In french we have an expression with "lueur d'espoir"/glimpse of hope and that's what Alear has to become during this journey. If you recall in chapter 25, Lumera mentions how she had to stay strong despite losing her family, her friends and fighting all alone as the Divine dragon, she wasn't alone to run away. This defintely gave more weight to the advice she gave Alear. Light is considered to be a symbol of hope. Lumera, because of her name, had to stay this symbole. What's more she is revered as a deity, meaning people belive in her and she has to hold up to their expectations. This is precisely Mauvier's mother losing hope in Lumera that leaded her to believe in Sombron instead. That is also shown through Alear's second resurection : "I wish I could see this and that, but all I can see" obviously was darkness, but it becomes light as the Emblem uses the Miracle on Alear. Alear has to go through a journey of having lived into the deepest pit of despair because of someone largely desesparated yet clining into a hope that came too be a delusion, to overcome obstacle and become the lueur d'espoir of this world, a brave leader that people will learn to believe in for who they are and not simply because they are the divine dragon. This also makes all of Alear's support about them being a normal person and not some sort of extraordinary being, albeit repetitive, important as it means that their allies knows that even if they commit mistakes like everyone else, they can still count on them and therefore not lost faith in them, which was not the case with Lumera and Mauvier's mother and makes it so important to point out how Alear swearing to never ever repeat their mistakes from chapter 10 is when it comes to their relationship with the other character as a whole.

Despite all it's flaws, the Fell Xenologue also shows the fate of a world deprived of light, coming from both Lumera and then Lueur themselves, a world plunged into darkness, without hope left, only dead people in it, a literal underworld created by Sombron through Rafal's manipulation. Chapter 22 too, seeing how tense it was. Sombron having absorbed the ring, raised Gradlon and heading to the portal for others world, Veyle switching to her other personality, and them being unable to summon Emblem, the world would have been doomed if Alear didn't came back. When Veyle was about to give up fighting, it's Alear that inspire her to fight back. This scene did a great job at portraying Alear as being the lueur d'espoir (even though the idea is still super dumb) they needed. Even in the final boss fight, as Sombron threatnens to close the door of the portal, it's Alear who stand whereas the other began to lose hope, saying that they won't give up and motivating everyone in the process.

Whatsmore Lueur's sword is named Libération, meaning freeing. The other weapong they can acquire is called Wille Glanz which means shining will in German. It's shows how they are freeing themselves from Sombron and from fear throught their journey, how they ended up developping a strong will and this lead me to talk about the bad ending.

Because, while Alear becoming an Emblem is quite peculiar. I mean, they become a unique Emblem who posses their own body and wear their own ring. Well, this immortalized their spirit but not their body. And nothing show this more then the bad ending.

This ending occurs if you fail to defeat Sombron and choose to not use the dragonic crystal. Alear awake with Sombron telling them that all their friends are dead, the camera switches to Veyle wearing her helmet and showing her other evil personality due to the helmet. She is much older, implying that the ending must take place after a long moment ever since Alear and their friends died. We see Veyle wearing the ring of the connector althrough in the game normally, only Alear can wear it. Alear looks into the mirror to see them dressed in black with their hair and eyes full red as opposed to their blue eyes and hair in their Emblem form, looking in absolute horror as Sombron laugh. This ending shows the consequence of the player/Alear giving up. The dragonic crystal, to an extent shows Alear's willingness to never give up even facing death and encouraging the player to not give up either when facing defeat but to simply try again and when the player rewind, they follow that mindset but if they don't, then a Game over appears. And in that case, the players decision to accept the game over dooms the world. Alear didn't became the lueur d'espoir, they didn't became the dragon that saved the world dressed in white with a shining sword, they got back to being similar to their past selves, dressed in black, prisoner of darkness, having failed to save this world, as this world was leaded to doom. Compared to the sword they wield, Libération, showing that they are freed, this ending showed that they became prisoner of the very thing that saved their life, being an Emblem, their body being dead, but their soul immortalized as an Emblem became prisoner of the ring of the Connector and because of the fact that Emblem summoned by Fell dragon are deprived of their own will and forced to obey, like Alear was 1 000 ago, obeying because of fear, but deprived of free will, acting without thinking. If the good ending is Alear accomplising themselves in a new life, then the bad one is a back to square one kind, with Alear becoming a prisonner of Sombron once again and with Veyle being trapped again in the process.

I'd like to point that out of all avatar and maybe of all character in Fire emblem, Alear is the ONLY ONE that can fail to save the world. In Awakening, Robin and Chrom don't fail to save the world since they are different people then their future selves, even if Lucina comes from a future where they failed. Robin's choices all ends up to the same conclusion of the world being save. Same with Corrin, what'ever path they choose, they save the world. Byleth's mission isn't to save the world nor even to stop the war, but their fonction is to choose Fodlan's future just as Shez and by that criteria, there is no bad route but only choices. Alear out of all of them, is the only Avatar who in this timeline, in this life, in this world who doesn't have to choose, their only choice is tied to the Dragonic Crystal, but it isn't even theirs... it's the player's. If the player give up, the world is doomed. No "all choices lead to the same conclusion", no "there is no right path", Alear is capable of failing in the very objective that has been theirs from the begining of the game : honoring their promise to Lumera and stopping Sombron from destroying Elyos. Here accepting the game over has terrible consequences, something that in other Fire Emblem games where magically ignored as for other video games. Something that even the Classical mode with permadeath can't equal. Alear can fail everything, failing at saving Elyos, failing all their friends and the connection they made, failling at saving their little sister, and becoming once again alone, prisoner of Sombron's power/influence. Alear is the only avatar whose dream can be left unfufilled if they end up giving up. This element even from a meta point of view is a terrible slap in the player's face, because it shows that yes they can fail, and not only their unit's life, but ... the world itself. The almighty player can be wrong. The almighty player can fail. That those long 25 chapter can be concluded on a terrible ending for the world itself. The ending that awaited all the characters upon chapter 22 had Alear being unable to came back, the ending that occured in the Fell Xenologue too. With the sole difference that Alear was still there and much alive, they came back in chapter 22 giving the cast the hope they lost. They arrived in the Fell Xenologue throught the prayer of a desesparated Nel as a new hope and even after discovering that this world couldn't be saved, they still offered hope back to the onlu survivors of the Fell world by inviting them into the Somniel. With that ending however, all hope is definetely lost. Alear's very philosophy, the one they learn though this journey, can be proven wrong by this ending. And compared to Sigurd who died along with the other gen 1 and was spared to see the world he failed to protect sink into darkness, Alear has to witness themselves their extent of their failures, and the cutscene shows how horrified they are. Saying that this is an unsettling element is an understatement. The Allmighty Avatar that came back to life (thrice) still managed to fail.

6- Elements surroding the Engage direction about how it convey Alear's point of view.

Saying that the Engage's art direction is something rather divising is quite accurate, seeing how the game itself pretty much divised people. However, to how much extent it was the case, we don't know. But there is one thing that seems obvious, is that for all the quotation marks that seems to be rotating around that subject, Engage relies on symbolims to help visually conveying Alear's perspective of their adventure.

While Engage does allows us to see what happen with other character like Hortensia or Zephia, Alear is the main focalizer and when surrounding Lumera and Sombron there is a clear play with duality between the two.

It's something very basic and obvious, and simple keeping with how Engage tries to be straightforward ad simple in it's story and world, the play between white and black, between angleic and paradisiac imagery and devlish/hellish imagery. When Alear meets Lumera for the second time, 1 000 after they awoke, once she transform into her human form, she is shining. Lumera is dressed in white and golden, her colour palette are pastel palette, which reflects how Alear and the other view her as : a luminous being, tender and kind, and angelic mother figure that Alear would ended up looking up to 1 000 ago, seeing how they said in their dying moment they wished to become like her, a rightfull dragon that save the world, dressed like her in white and with a shining sword, like hers. Sombron in comparison, looks monstrous even in his human (?) form. His purplish skin reflects that, as well as his demonic design with his sharp teeth and long pointy ears, his bright red eyes. His terrying appearance is meant to convey how it feels through Alear's eyes, he is the source of their suffering, their trauma, their darkness itself, pretty much how Grima was symbolizing Robin's grief. Lythos is shown to be an idylic place, a beautiful garden, and white immaculate castle in which evil presence like the Corrupted cannot enter compared to Gradlon, a dark place, volcanic, so hot that you can barely bear it, with a dark temple with the articheture being less vast then Lythos castle, darker, an unsettling place. They were characterized after how they are to Alear and to Alear's mind. This is even more obvious as when Lumera becomes Corrupted, she is shown to be scary : Alear loves Lumera as their mother, but their mother became the one thing that used to haunt their nightmare.

Another evidence of this are obviously the character's name : Lueur, Lumière and Sombre. In the dark, a glow ens up extenguishing itself, in the light, it gains intensity. This supposed to show how Alear went from the darkness to the light, to being an evil dragon to a good one. To choose the right path. To Alear, Sombron is the source of evil and of Darkness itself, it's his arrival that perturbed the peaceful land that was once Lythos and Alear never knew him as any other thing than that, the cause of their suffering, as opposed to Lumera the source of their salvation.

This is even present in the opening theme... not the eng one, the japanese one. I mean, look at the lines :

約束した　名を呼んで 駆け抜けた十二の光　覚えている

We made a promise, you called my name

Do you recall the 12 lights running across ?

This refers to the promise Alear made with Lumera. The 名を呼んで part is refered to in chapter 25; Lumera saying " the day I called your name, I stopped to be alone"

or

赤の記憶燃え上がり

The red memory burning bright

refering to Alear's memories and most probably my argument from the game to all the people who for some reason refuse to take into account Past Alear in the story of Alear's character developpement because "they don't remember this period"...( boi, forbid people from writing their character having duality due to how they built themselves and became a different person after their amnesia !!)

or

繋げ炎　伝えよ愛を あの旅路のように 彼の人のように

Connect the flame, convey the love

Like this journey did

Like this person did.

This shows that the "kimi" the narrator is adressing to is Alear and to some extent the player as the song is about Alear's journey. Their goal to save the world "like this person "did, to become the one link connecting everyone, Emblem from different game and people from different countries who barely had ties to each others.

And no I am not making things up seeing how the last chorus replace "like this person did" by

此の紋章のように

Like this Emblem did

It's not even the only moment where the music was designed to reflect Alear's perspective on things. The Corrupted theme is here to convey musically Alear's fear. The use of electronic and the rythme creates an unsettling vibes, attempting to deliver the impression delivered by the Corrupted, as Alfred described them " They are things are like people, but cracked, almost crumbling", a cacophonic melody that attempts to recreate the way the Corrupted walks in the game. Compare this to Faraway Holy Land, the quietness and relaxing vibes from this music reflecting the holyness and peacefulness of Lythos.

Tragedy playing in chapter 10 perfectly reflects the mind of not only Alear but their allies being the one moment where they failed King Morion. Black devastation reflects perfectly the impact that Alear felt faiing the Emblems, Alear's gravest mistakes. It goes from the chock, to the arrival of the Hounds feeling cacophonic, to despair noticing that Veyle stole the rings, with the heartbeat of Alear resonanting, to the utter despair as they beg for Sombron to stop, to the anger they felt towards Veyle at that moment. Chilling rain reflects Alear's helpness as they are trying to escape with their allies after commiting a terrible mistakes and are struglling through a wave of Corrupted reinforcements (which reminds me of Don't speal her name from Awakening). Fell Dragon Sombron is a short slow music however, it's an horror feast of terrifying sounds.

I'd also point out that like many FE games, Engage reuses a lot it's main theme into it's various soundtrack however, when it does, it chooses a peculiar moment of the main theme to do so. The soundtrack Engage that play in the main menu is the end of the opening song, Dragon dream uses the brigde mixed with the ending of the song, Garden of Light, a very slowed down version of the chorus, History of Elyos, mixing the end of the opening with the main them of Fire Emblem, Veyle'theme reusing a slow arrange of the main theme's bridge. And so on and so on. If you compare, most of those tracks reusuing the main theme are either fight theme, either Alear/Lythos/Gradlon related theme seeing how the Kingdom's theme doesn't have this leiftmotiv. Basically, look at Memories from Red days and you'll understand : those songs are reusing the main theme to convey musically Alear's feelings, remniscene and so on and so on. The biggest evidence of that is how Veyle's theme reuses the bridge of the main theme, the part saying "the red memory burning bright" as Veyle being Alears sister that they meet once still evoked a sense of familiarity and is played for foreshadowing.

And that is just a sample of an Alear analysis. Really. I just tried to focus on how the game tried to conveys Alear's fear and growing from that using dialogues, story chapter, visual symbolism from the art and the music, and every element I felt necessary but because it was about focusing on how the game showed Alear as a coward and an individual making mistakes and growing from it, I focused on this rather then making a full analysis of them.

But now, if that's how the game shows Alear's personality then how come so many people don't see their evolution and consider them to be bland ? Why is it that so many players complains about Alear being boring, having no real character growth or dilema in Engage ? Why is it that people will rightfully say that the manga does a better job at characterizing Alear ?

Well, the manga doesn't have a nintendo to say STOP apparently unlike the game, and the manga can shows more ealisy thanks to illustration that can be left without dialogue, whereas in FE game it's not even an option. What's more, being an Avatar gives people biais towards Alear as they are unable to view them as a real FE protagonist despite being the second character that feel the least like an Avatar, the first one being Shez. And being an Avatar hardly changes who Alear is as a character. And finally, one of the saddly common factor in Engage "criticism"... bad faith. Why ? Because people never described Alear in a same way: for some they are boring and uninteresing because they are already "a grown individuals with a set of morals", for other they are "painfully naive, throwing tantrum around like a child (friendly reminded they are 17 years old) and never learning anything as they keep making stupid mistakes", for other "they don't have real goals nor real motivation" yet others will say that Alear feels like they aren't trying to improve to reach their goal and motivations, implying thereby that they do have some... and so on and so on.

However, as you can see, from the game's textual reading, everything is pretty much showing that Alear is a person capable of failing and trying to improve themselves as a leader and as a ruler for Lythos.

And that was it. Hope you'd enjoy this and if you feel like adding something feel free to reblogg or to send me ask in my inbox

[genshin-obsessed]

I know your busy could you do albedo or Xaio comfort- Bunni anon

I took my sweet time with this buuuut lets just say it can be used for future comfort?? unless you still need it now IN WHICH CASE- Also there's one line that's totally gonna ruin the atmosphere i was trying to create buuut i couldn't help myself. Just lemme have it. <333 Did I type this all up just now? Yes. Am I proud of it? Very yes. <33

Make You Smile

Albedo

"... the solution can be diluted with water but don't add too much unless- oh. You're not listening." Albedo said, looking towards you. You sat across from him, notebook open to a brand new page to take down any notes he needed for his current experiment. But, unlike usual, your notebook was completely empty.

You were staring off into the distance, your eyes filled with something he didn't see often. Sadness. Albedo didn't understand people like a normal person did. He based everything off of formulas and algorithms, but people didn't work like that. Normally, he wouldn't worry about people too much, but you were special. You were his special partner, so of course he would do anything to understand you.

Even then, comforting you... that was difficult. Should he hug you? Kiss you? What if you didn't want physical comfort? Would you like your favorite meal? Favorite desert? Did you wanna go outside? Were you tired of these experiments? Did someone say something to you?

What went on in your head, that he had a hard time understanding. Unsure of what course of action would be best, he inhaled and took a chance.

Reaching out, Albedo took your hand, making your (color) eyes snap to him. He rubbed the back of your hand with his thumb ever so gently.

"I'm not sure what to say to make you feel better. But... I want you to be happy. I'm right here, so don't feel like you have to keep it in. If... crying helps, then it's ok. I'll dry your tears. If today you'd like to be nowhere near the lab, then we can go out. We'll do anything that you like. We can go to Good Hunter. Maybe visit Venti? We could also take a walk to Angel's Share or Dawn Winery."

As he paused to give you a chance to speak, he noticed your eyes glossing over with tears. You turned your hand in his, grasping it tightly. Standing up, you walked around the desk and straight into his arms, burying your face in his chest.

"I'm sorry." You sniffled, letting the tears, flow.

"Don't be. We don't have control of our emotions and if you feel like they're getting too much, then you can come to me. It's ok... it'll be ok. I promise."

"Everything feels so overbearing. I feel so exhausted all the time. I feel so... unhappy. I feel so alone."

"I'm sorry. I hope you know that you're not alone though. I'll always be here for you. I'll never leave you alone, no matter what."

He felt your arms tighten around his torso as you sniffled. While lightly hushing you in an attempt to soothe your anxiety, Albedo ran his fingers through your hair. He would let you cry as long as you needed to, as long as it made you feel better. As long as it made you smile.

Xiao

You and Xiao didn't talk as much as people thought. You two didn't have the traditional dates. Going to dinner at a fancy restaurant wasn't exactly Xiao's scene. Normally, you two would share Almond Tofu on the rooftop of Wangshu Inn. Sometimes he would join you on your adventures if you went on any.

So, most of your time spent together was either conversations were you talked for the two of you or just comfortable silence. But after spending so long with you, Xiao knew exactly how to differentiate between your comfortable silence or inability to form words due to heavy emotions. The only problem following that was... he didn't know how to comfort you.

Xiao spent time away from people. He actively avoided humans for a reason and that made him quite antisocial. Normally, it wouldn't bother him. Who cared about anyone else? But you weren't anyone else. You were (y/n). Xiao's special person and he'd be damned if he couldn't help you.

But he couldn't help you. That's what hurt the most. That's what hurt more than the burden of his sins. Actually... his sins were nothing compared to the utter despair he felt at his inability to help you. Your smile was the salve to all these wounds he carried. Yet here you sat, carrying wounds of your own, but he couldn't help you.

Your eyes were locked onto the stars above and you were trying your best to hide your sorrow, but Xiao was too observant for that. His perception broke through any barriers you'd put up. But what to do with such an ability?

"I..." Xiao started, falling short but garnering your attention regardless. You turned to look at him, eyes filled with desolation. What would make you... so upset? The only thing he knew to do was kill. Could he kill your sadness? Maybe if the source was a person, but it wasn't. Those were the demons you carried inside of you and how was he supposed to kill them? Without killing you in the process?

"Everything ok, Xiao?" You asked, which almost made him laugh if he already wasn't so dead inside. Here you were, unhappy, yet still looking to make him feel better. That was the push he needed apparently.

"You know I'm not good at this. I... don't know how to make people feel better and usually, I don't care. But you're not just 'people'. You're... special to me. I don't know how to feel like you do. I'm not good at comforting like you can or anyone else. But I don't want you to be sad."

"I-I'm not, I'm just-"

"You can't lie to me. I'll always see through it. I'll always know you're being less than truthful. It's ok if you don't want to talk about it. It's ok if you don't want to confront whatever is making you upset. But... I want you to know..." Xiao said, meeting your eyes. He could already see the change in emotions through them. Gently taking your hand and pulling you, he placed you in his lap, wrapping his arms around you. You could feel how tense he was and you knew he was pushing himself, which would make you confront him about this. But at the same time... you enjoyed this bit of affection you got.

"Xiao..."

"I will face anything and everything with you. If the world made you cry... then I would destroy it whole. I... I want you to smile, (y/n). How... do I make you smile?"