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#I could go on into more detail on the rest but I don't wanna make it TOO long so!!
paper-mario-wiki · 2 days
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I feel like I've ended up in the same spot as so transmasc before me: I have a lovely cis boyfriend who loves my tits which I love for him, but I am getting dysphoric to the point I wanna lift my lips and show a lil teeth when I see his hands coming towards them. Feels bad because they are his favorite and we haven't been fucking as much because as soon as he starts touching me I am out of it™ and get all in my head and freeze up. Any advice?
good god, brother. i am utterly baffled at why you have elected me as the strategist for this problem, and i'm even more confused as to why you have chosen to go into as much detail as you have.
but.
if i were to give you some advice on this
i'd say that you should consider a conversation with your partner about the long-term plan for the relationship. a "relationship" is two lives that are connected, right? and your life is not one where you're gonna have boobs for the rest of it (or at least based on what you've told me i would assume, should you have your way, those bad boys are gettin lopped off at some point), therefore it's pertinent that it be brought up, because it concerns your life, therefore it concerns the relationship, therefore it concerns him, yes?
now, the first and most obvious thing to start with out the gate is the boundary, made clear and concise: the hills are now closed, off limits to tourists. all discussions regarding this come next. make it clear that it's about something quite core to your identity, and something that does in fact cause physical pain (a panic response from the nervous system is pain homie).
this brings some followup questions (and remember, this isn't an interrogation, it's a dialogue to share): how does he feel about this? if he's against, why? for that matter, how much does it bother him? is there something he doesn't understand about your discomfort? is there some concern he has about your financial or bodily well-being with regards to the procedure? is it because it's vital to his attraction to you as a partner? if that's the case, would their removal be a deal-breaker?
now keep in mind, these question can be brought up whether or not you've got immediate plans to engage in the aforementioned lopping-off of your aforementioned Bad Boys, because the actual point of this dialectical exercise is to create a simple, easy to navigate, easy to understand conversation, which will set a foundation for further negotiations-- should you learn something new about each other, or yourselves, or the relationship as a whole.
either way, i do not think that letting it keep happening and keeping it to yourself is a good idea. i can understand feeling guilty about withholding some physical and emotional gratification you could give "easily" to this person you care dearly for, but trust me when i say that it's not the way to let it be. not just because it's unfair to your partner to secretly grow to resent them for a reason you don't want to vocalize, but to yourself as well.
you may not know it, but by keeping it to yourself you're slowly building up a resentment. that frustration actually shows up pretty clearly in your message. and even if what you're frustrated about is only that particular activity, that activity is irrevocably tied to another person. specifically, a person that you consider to be a pretty central pillar in your life. if that resentment grows, it can evolve into anger, hatred, fear, paranoia, and all sorts of nasty things. and even aside from the emotional and psychological damage that can do, it can grow into a physiological issue, where your brain wears out more and more due to the growing emotional distress ripping through your neurons with all sorts of "emergency" chemicals. like i said, the panic response is a physical pain, even if your body doesn't feel like it "hurts".
so. to summarize.
ABSOLUTELY bring it up. if you don't, it could become damaging to your relationship, and also your actual real life physical brain.
when you do bring it up, remember that the goals are to set a boundary, and to reach an understanding through mutual conversation. it's a dialogue, not a lecture.
when you reach an understanding, figure out if the relationship needs to be renegotiated in some way. that usually means new boundaries, or expectations. or maybe nothing! though surely your boyfriend can find more things to love about you.
that's as best as i can muster. you don't have to follow it, but hopefully it'll at least give you some ideas you can use.
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nonuggetshere · 2 years
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PLS elaborate on ur hollow gets found out scenarios I beg
RUBS MY HANDS TOGETHER LIKE A FLY
HERE'S A FEW
The most developed one (and one that even has its own variants) involves their first training session. They've been practising moves for a while and it was finally time to check their combat skills in a battle. Of course, they're like...7, so the knights go easy on them. Still, the hits hurt, and after 2 or 3 more they just burst into tears and can't stop crying even when the knights drop everything and try to comfort them. Pale King was watching them and is absolutely horrified, but pushes his impending emotional crisis away to go comfort his kid. Dryya is also the one that hit them and she's also absolutely horrified and feels guilty.
In another version, that's a variant of FaaF because of course it is, Pale King sort of breaks down one day early on because fuck he loves that kid so much and he wasn't supposed to love them, and they look so much like him and his beloved wife and it just crushes him. He's suddenly regretting all of it, regretting not keeping at least one egg. And when they're alone and he looks at them he finally just breaks down and falls to his knees. And then after a while of crying and apologising, he feels two little hands pet his head.
In a similar vibe to that one, there's one where Pale King and White Lady visibly mourn the child they think is dead, and after realising it PV decides to reveal themself. They end up getting named Joy in that one.
There's one that involves Pale King using weird mind powers on them. Basically, he links their minds together briefly to make sure they're hollow, expecting complete emptiness as he was so sure of his plan working out, only to be met with a very tiny very scared child instead.
There's a version where they just do not vibe with being taken away from their siblings and go back to the Abyss's door and scratch at it and cry, and Pale King finds them there like that.
There's one where they're having a bad dream or dreaming about having a normal life and loving parents (ouch) and they wake up crying. It's early in the day so one of the knights goes to wake them up and get them to the training grounds, but instead they find them crying in their bed.
There's one where Radiance realises they're not hollow very early on and decides to infect them. She can't do anything with a little kid, she just decided to be a spiteful bitch and hit Pale King where it hurts. She pushed her luck though because he's had enough and he's going to show her what a pissed-off wyrm is capable of. They recover, thankfully, but holy shit what a horrible way to find out.
SPEAKING OF HORRIBLE WAYS TO FIND OUT
The last idea is quite dark, so I'm gonna out it under a readmore
TW: physical abuse and child abuse, if you're sensitive to these topics please just skip that last one
The last one involves a staff member who decided to use PV as a punching bag to deal with their stress and problems because they weren't alive so it wasn't wrong, right? But they don't stop either when the poor kid starts crying and makes it clear that they are alive and hurt by this.
Thankfully, Pale King hears a kid crying and goes to check it out and walks in on this. And he damn near murders that fucker right there and then. The only reason he stops himself and calls the guards instead was because he didn't want his kid to see that, but he did scream his head off at the scumbag and gave them quite a bit of scratches after he threw himself between them and PV.
He coaxes PV from under the bed where they hid and gently pulls them onto his lap. They're still sobbing and sniffling and he tries to get them to show him where it hurts all the while speaking softly to them and rocking them in his lap. They pat their tummy and squeal quietly when he puts his hand on it, but calm down as he heals them. He then just holds them on his lap and comforts them for a long time, all the while rubbing their belly to try and soothe it.
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vetyr · 5 months
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hi, i ireally love your work and i don't know if you've answered this before but, what kinds of studies do you do or how did you learn color theory? i wanna get better at rendering and anatomy but im having trouble TT TT
Hi! Long answer alert. Once a chatterbox, always a chatterbox.
When I started actively learning how to draw about 10 1/2 years ago, I exclusively did graphite studies in sketchbooks. Here's a few examples—I mostly stuck to doing line drawings to drill basic shapes/contours and proportions into my brain. The more rendered sketches helped me practice edge control & basic values, and they were REALLY good for learning the actual 3D structure behind what I was drawing.
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I'd use reference images that I grabbed from fitness forums, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest, and some NSFW places, but you could find adequate ref material from figure drawing sites like Line of Action. LoA has refs for people (you can filter by clothed/unclothed, age, & gender), animals, expressions, hands/feet, and a few other useful things as well. Love them.
Learning how to render digitally was a similar story; it helped a lot that I had a pretty strong foundation for value/anatomy going in. I basically didn't touch color at all for ~2 years (except for a few attempts at bad digital or acrylic paint studies), which may not have been the best idea. I learned color from a lot of trial and error, honestly, and I'm pretty sure this process involved a lot of imitation—there were a number of digital/traditional painters whose styles I really wanted to emulate (notably their edge control, color choices, value distributions, and shape design), so I kiiind of did a mixture of that + my own experimentation.
For example, I really found Benjamin Björklund's style appealing, especially his softened/lost edges & vibrant pops of saturated color, so here's a study I did from some photograph that I'm *pretty* sure was painted with him in mind.
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Learning how to detail was definitely a slow process, and like all the aforementioned things (anatomy/color/edge control/values/etc.) I'm still figuring it out. Focusing on edge control first (that is, deciding on where to place hard/soft edges for emphasizing/de-emphasizing certain areas of the image) is super useful, because you can honestly fool a viewer into thinking there's more detail in a piece than there actually is if you're very economical about where you place your hard edges.
The most important part, to me, is probably just doing this stuff over and over again. You're likely not going to see improvement in a few weeks or even a few months, so don't fret about not getting the exact results you want and just keep studying + making art. I like to think about learning art as a process where you *need* to fail and make crappy art/studies—there's literally no way around it—so you might as well fail right now. See, by making bad art you're actually moving forward—isn't that a fun prospect!!
It's useful to have a folder with art you admire, especially if you can dissect the pieces and understand why you like them so much. You can study those aspects (like, you can redraw or repaint that person's work) and break down whether this is art that you just like to look at, or if it's the kind of art that you want to *make.* There's a LOT of art out there that I love looking at, probably tens of thousands of styles/mediums, but there's a very narrow range that I want to make myself.
I've mentioned it in some ask reply in the past, but I really do think looking at other artist's work is such a cheat code for improving your own skills—the other artist does the work to filter reality/ideas for you, and this sort of allows you to contact the subject matter more directly. I can think of so many examples where an artist I admired exaggerated, like, the way sunlight rested on a face and created that orange fringe around its edge, or the greys/dull blues in a wheat field, or the bright indigo in a cast shadow, or the red along the outside of a person's eye, and it just clicked for me that this was a very available & observable aspect of reality, which had up until that point gone completely unnoticed! If you're really perceptive about the art you look at, it's shocking how much it can teach you about how to see the world (in this particular case I mean this literally, in that the art I looked at fully changed the way I visually processed the world, but of course it has had a strong effect on my worldviews/relationships/beliefs).
Thanks so much for sending in a question (& for reading, if you got this far)! I read every single ask I receive, including the kind words & compliments, which I genuinely always appreciate. Best of luck with learning, my friend :)
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lymtw · 3 months
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hello Mal!!! i have a nsfw req for toji x shy reader cuz they’re my fav and i literally think about it 24/7.
shy reader who’s not as vocal during sex with toji bc she gets nervous :( so he edges her til she squirts for the first time but only if she uses her voice!!!
Hello, hello! Thank you for reading and for sending this request in ☺️💙
Toji and his shy girl
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"What are you doing down there?" Toji asks, finally giving in to the distraction of you sitting at his feet, rather than sitting next to him.
"I'm watching the movie," you respond, with an innocent amount of truthfulness. You don't turn around to look at him, so you're met with a poke to your shoulder. That instinctively makes you turn your head in the direction of the contact.
"The couch is too big. Even for me, doll. Come sit." He pats the spot next to him and shifts where he sits, as if making even more room for you.
Your eyes flit between him and the cushion for a couple seconds before you respond. "I'm okay staying here. I don't wanna make you uncomfortable." You smile, kindly, and turn back to face the screen again.
Toji's brows furrow in misunderstanding. He taps your shoulder again, receiving the same look when you turn, again. You tilt your head in question.
"You wouldn't be making me uncomfortable. Far from it, with the enormous gap of space that would be between us. What if I wanted you to sit between my legs, instead?" He catches the way your eyes widen for a split second, your inhibition cleared for the short span of time. "Come sit, baby," he repeats, this time patting the unoccupied space of the cushion he's sitting on.
You don't want to make him wait any longer. The movie is still playing, you'll both lose track of the plot if you take any longer. You stand from your place on the ground and move to sit next to him. As soon as you bend down to sit, his hands go to your hips and he pulls you so that you fall into the place he wanted you in.
"There you go. Now pay attention to the movie."
You try for him. You're trying so hard to ignore the pressure of his forearms around your waist, and the warmth of his wrists against the sliver of skin revealed by your slightly lifted shirt. You can occasionally hear him sigh through his nose, only further adding on to the tension you feel upon sitting between his legs. You don't even know how he's watching the movie. You feel like you're obstructing his vision.
The movie ends and you're left staring at the title screen.
"Okay, movie's over. You probably want me off-"
"No." His arms fasten even more around you. "I'm comfortable. Are you not?"
"N-No, I am. It's just... I wasn't sure if you wanted to keep me here for a whole other movie."
"I could keep you here longer than that, doll." He straightens his posture and readjusts your position, so that he's not slouching and you're not leaning back uncomfortably. He can feel the tension surface on your body as you go rigid in his hold. He can't help but let out a small laugh at how this detail never ceases with you. "Relax, baby. What's got you so nervous?" He rests his chin on your shoulder and turns to get a better look at your face. "Hm?" He plants a chaste kiss to your temple.
"Nothing, I guess. We're just watching movies," you say, more as a reminder for yourself.
"Mhm. Watching movies... on the verge of cuddling..." he mumbles, into your neck. "Nothing to be nervous about."
His hands splay over your lower abdomen and you think he might be caressing your skin so sensually to mess with you after having said all those things to comfort you, but he's not relenting on the joke. He's kissing your shoulder, aiming to relieve you of some of your anxiety so that your body can melt into comfort. It has some effect on you, your nerves being mixed with something hot, now.
"We can do more than cuddling, if you want," he hums, grinning at the way you shudder. "You know, i've been dying to hear that pretty voice of yours."
"What?" you say, laughing nervously, like you misheard him.
"You've got a really nice voice, baby. I swear, I could listen to you talk, endlessly. Wish you would use it when I take you to bed. You don't make a peep, doll."
You go silent. Not because you're upset with him, or because what he said isn't true, but because you can't think of how to respond to that. You didn't think he was monitoring the sounds you make. He never said anything about it before. You figured maybe he preferred the silence.
"It's embarrassing..." you finally mumble, quickly turning around to right what may have come out wrong. "F-For me! Just me. You're fine to make all the sound you want. It's... it's just me." You turn back around to hide the flush of embarrassment on your cheeks.
"Why is it embarrassing? Am I not making you feel good enough?"
You can't let him feel that way.
"No, Toji- That's not- No, no, no. That's not the case, at all." You unwind his arms from your torso and turn to face him. You fully sit on his lap, and though the eye contact that comes after you wrap your legs around him was like having three cups of coffee on an empty stomach for your heart, you summed up the courage because it's not fair to let him think that way when it's the exact opposite. "I just..." you let out a small sigh. "I don't wanna be loud. I don't want you to hear me. God... I can barely even look at you when we... you know." You look down at where your hands absentmindedly rested on his stomach. "Sorry."
He's just smiling at you because he finds your entire existence beside him to be endearing. His hands go to yours. "I get to stare at your pretty face the entire time." He grins, watching the way your cheeks burn and how you try to distract yourself from his gaze by fidgeting with his hands. "You always look so good, ma. Bet you sound just as pretty."
There was so much tension in the silence that followed. He started playing with your hands. He would interlock his fingers with yours before slowly detangling your hands and repeating the process, flipping your hands this time. He got to feel the smoothness of your unpainted nails on the pads of his fingers, and he traced the lines etched into your palms.
Things got out of hand. One minute you were holding hands and laughing to yourselves with thoughts of how silly yet necessary the moment was, the next you were both undressing, and kissing like you missed each other terribly. He has his hands on your hips, guiding you up and down his cock while you hide your face in the crook of his neck. He's groaning and panting at the feeling of your velvety walls hugging him so tightly, and you just release little breaths into his neck, occasionally gasping when he hits a sensitive spot, as per usual.
"Baby," he pants, "let me hear you. Give me those pretty sounds."
"G-Gonna cum," you whisper, your breath becoming heavier with every upwards thrust of his hips.
"Not if you don't let me hear you."
He can feel you clenching around him more frequently. It's a telltale sign of your orgasm rolling in, so he immediately stops. Both of you are unsatisfied, but Toji can handle it for as long as it takes you to make a sound that isn't just your breathing. He can tell you want to, too, with the occasional squeaks that leave you.
"I-I was gonna-"
"And I meant what I said." He's just as edged and frustrated as you are. Despite not getting the sounds he wants from you so easily, you're still make him feel really good. Your touch, the skin-to-skin of you clinging onto him—it's enough to bring him towards the edge as well, and it takes every ounce of restraint for him to stop. He squeezes your waist when he sees the look of helpless desperation on your face. "You know I have all the patience when it comes to you, doll. We can do this all night. I just wanna know—audibly—that I'm making you feel as good as you say I am. Alright?"
You sigh, but nod in understanding.
"Good. Let's try that again."
Despite your gesture of comprehension, you're doing the same thing all over again. You're feeling good, you're comfortable and Toji sounds immensely hot as he continues to drive you up and down his length. Your arms are wrapped around his neck, your face once again buried into the crook of it. All that can be heard from you is your breathing, the warm air fanning over his already heated skin.
"Doll," he calls, feeling the way you mouth at his shoulder and neck.
"Please, just a little longer. Please," you murmur, feeling that spike in pleasure return again.
"Doll, you're not..." he groans. He knows he has to stop or you'll get what you want, and what he wants will be pushed aside. "You're not letting me hear your pretty voice."
"Please, please, please, Toji. I-I'm right there..."
"Uh-uh." With heavy hands weighing down your hips like cinder blocks, you're once again denied of that weakening force of pleasure.
"T-Toji," you utter, weakly. You drag your face down to his chest, and allow all the heavy breaths of the forceful stop to come out. Your cunt is throbbing, viciously. You're aching for more of him.
The man who usually caved to your every want and put your needs before everything, was suddenly being incredibly selfish with your pleasure, stopping every time you say you're close. You think you can find a way around it by just not warning him, but he knows your body like the back of his hand. He knows every one of the signs that come with your orgasms, making it pointless for you to try to evade his torture. He's done it to the point where you feel like mush, sluggishly lying against him.
"Look at me, doll. Lift your head."
"Mm-mm." You shake your head against his shoulder.
"Be good." He chuckles at your stubbornness and allows a hand to rest on your lower back. "I'm trying to give you what you want, so would you just look at me."
You sigh, before you start peeling yourself, little by little, off of him.
He immediately notices the involuntary lift of your lips. "Ooh, look at that pout. Could've just told me you wanted a kiss, doll." He smirks, watching as you turn your head slightly to hide the scorch on your cheeks. It's not the main thing you wanted, but you weren't mad when he did pull you in for a kiss, because he started moving his hips again, the pace slow as your lips remained locked. That slow pace was how every one of these torturous cycles started out, but this time it was different. It was now harder to get what you wanted.
"Eyes on me, baby, or I stop."
"I can't- Please, Toji." You want to bury your face in the crook of his neck, again. You want to hide yourself from those eyes of his that never fail to make you feel vulnerable.
"Eyes on me... or I stop," he repeats, calmly, as if enduring all of these stops is such a simple task for both of you. You look at him, and immediately feel like you're being swallowed whole. You feel like he's eating you alive with just his gaze. The sweat beading on his forehead, the tint of color on his cheeks, the lust that simmers in his eyes… it's an insane visual. It's overwhelming.
He sees it, though. The way you try to still your bottom lip as it quivers, the way your chest spasms from holding it all in, your pleading eyes. It's all so... you. So fragile, so timid, so small. So beautiful.
"Good girl. Yeah... just look at me," he instructs, and you whimper. Your gaze falls to his chest as embarrassment floods you at light speed. Your hands reach out for him like they do when you're ready to wrap your arms around him again, but he intercepts them. The brief noise homed into Toji's ears, and rushed straight down to his dick. He can't afford to be deprived of your facial expressions when he now knows what your pretty voice sounds like when it's laced with need. "Fuck... again. Do it again, princess. I heard that loud and clear."
"P-Please. Please, let me go back." You test the strength of his grip, twisting your wrists in his hold. He responds by pushing your arms behind you, the edge of his palms grazing your lower back with every bounce of you on his cock.
"What did I say, baby? Huh? Lift your head and look at me." When you refuse to listen and keep staring at his chest, he decides to give you a countdown for when he's going to stop. "Three..."
"No! Okay, okay," you say, complying with lifting your gaze. Your pleasure skyrockets when you make eye contact with him. He gives you a little smirk, like he's proud of you for showing him that you'll always be good for him, even if you're stubborn about it.
"Shit, mama. You feel so fucking good. Might just cum before you, if you keep this up."
You moan at the threat and bite the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from looking away again. Every sound you let slip makes Toji pick up the pace of his thrusts. They're always precise, so with the speed rising, you think you might catch up to his pleasure. "Please, Toji. Please." The second plead comes out as a whine. "Please, i'm... um..." you hum, shutting your eyes briefly at the sensation of him prodding your sensitive spot again and again. "I'm..." Another whimper slips out.
"Yeah?" He murmurs, watching you struggle to finish your thought, through lidded eyes. "Get it out. All of it."
You're cracking. Your little moans are becoming more and more audible. "I'm trying." You gasp, the breath coming out shaky.
Toji is devouring all of it. His focus is unbreakable, and his thoughts of you are greedy. He wants more than what you're giving him. He wants you to be louder, he wants you to scream his name, he wants to make you cum so hard that you let go of all that embarrassment and moan freely for him.
He removes one of his hands from your wrists, keeping them restrained with his other hand, so that he can toy with your clit. The rush of pleasure makes you twitch above him, a sweet moan instantly released by you. You feel so flustered, you can't hold the sounds back as well as before. It's the unfaltering look he throws at you. He has no trouble holding eye contact with you.
He's obsessed with this show you're putting on for him. The way you're crumbling for him, slowly giving in and losing your tentativeness towards making sound. You remain overwhelmed by all of it. The heavy breathing, his groans, the rapid movement of his thrusts, his rough thumb stroking your clit, the way you're so lost in the pleasure of it all that you've become just as greedy as him, chasing even more stimulation by grinding your hips against him. It's a loud scene.
"T-Toji, Toji!" You gasp. "I'm- Oh!"
"Oh fuck. Cum," he growls. "Cum, pretty girl. Cum for-"
Your entire body is trembling on top of him. Loud cries fill the room as your orgasm washes over you, in the most unbelievably messy way. Toji is stunned, entirely speechless as he fucks you through this intense orgasm. Your back is arched in so much you think your spine might snap, and you can't for the life of you stop crying out his name. This is one of the most powerful orgasms he has pulled from you, if not the most powerful. Toji's lap is drenched, your ass and the backs of your thighs are wet. It's never happened this way before. Your mind is so clouded, you can't even think of what just happened.
Not even a minute later, Toji mirrors you in experiencing that feeling of pure ecstasy, heavy pants and groans released, carelessly, by him. His warm load is shot into you, adding on to the mess when it begins to drool out of you and down his length.
You're both breathless, left frozen in your positions for a good amount of time, while you think about what just happened. You come down from your blissful state first and can't even think to look at him. You pull your hands out of his weakened grip and rest them on your thighs and just stare at them until he says something. You don't know what to say, so you'll let him do the talking.
It was a heat of the moment type thing. Completely unexpected and he's shocked to say the least. It takes Toji a couple minutes himself to think of what to say, but ultimately, he thinks this is the best way to break the ice...
"You just squirted... all over me."
You don't even look up at him when he says that. You just might cry from the continuously skyrocketing level of embarrassment you're feeling.
"Do you have anything to say about it?" He asks, to which you just shake your head. He lets a couple seconds go by, just to add an unnecessary dramatic effect to the situation, before picking up the conversation again. "Well, good thing I have some things to say about it, pretty." He grins and wraps you up in his arms, allowing you to return to your safe space. "You know how much I love you, right?" He says, turning his head to look down at your face. You hum in response and nod against his shoulder. "And that I only pushed you so that you wouldn't hide your voice from me anymore?" You nod again. "Well, I was right." He smirks, thinking of how he got exactly what he wanted. "I'll leave it at that so you don't overheat on me."
He sighs, contentedly, at the feeling of you being so relaxed in his arms now, compared to before. "You did so well for me, mama," he says, before pressing multiple kisses to your head.
There's a beat of silence. Toji can't stop thinking of that spontaneous moment. It's stuck on loop in his head. It's not convenient in this moment, since you're cockwarming him, but before you know it, he's half hard inside you again.
"You think I can make you do it on purpose, this time?"
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jezabelle9299 · 1 month
Text
Read My Diary S.R x FEM! Reader
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Overture- Spencer comes home to you sitting on the floor mid-closet cleanout reading a book he's never seen before. Also I only wrote one entry because I could not for the life of me think of another one.
C-W's- Kissing, yearning, general pining. And one use of Y/N
A/N- I wrote this on a whim to get my mind off a job interview tomorrow so if you hate it please don't tell me!
March 23- Spencer was so sweet today. He read over my shoulder, and all I could think about was how stupid happy he makes me. And yet– we aren’t together. Penelope thinks he likes me,  and I really wish I could believe her, but he doesn’t see me that way. No matter how much I want him to.
But now of course, you were together. And he was still making you stupid happy, and Penelope was right as always. So you giggled to yourself as you read through the rest of the entries. You, pining for Spencer, the excitement of your first date, until just about the first time you said ‘I love you’ and you stopped writing. Anything you wanted to say you could just tell him, you didn’t have to write it down anymore. 
“What are you reading…on the floor?” You looked up and couldn’t believe you didn’t hear the door open. You knew he was coming home, so you were just trying to bide time by cleaning out your closet. You got distracted by an old diary you hadn’t written in for months and ended up settled on the floor of your bedroom. 
Spencer was confused, both by the fact that you were on the floor, and by the fact you were surrounded by old clothes you hardly ever wore, reading a book he’d never seen before. And even more curious at what had gotten you so wrapped up you apparently didn’t hear him come in. Whenever you got that into a book, you always told him about it. Every detail of what you liked about it, and he’d listen to every word. But instead of lighting up and telling him everything, you got sheepish and replied with a sing-songy “Nothing”. He gave you a skeptical look, but left it at that. 
He set his things down to join you on the floor, reading over your shoulder like he always does. What was once an excuse to get close to you, looking at case files together, became a show of just how much he loves you. But when he kissed you on the cheek and you looked down, realizing what he was about to read, all rational thought was out the window. On instinct you threw the book through the open doorway and halfway down the hall, and because that wasn’t enough you even screamed “No!”
Spencer just shifted to look at your face from his position behind you, trying to figure out what that outburst was. “Would you like to tell me what that was about?” But instead of answering the question, you just turned around, propping yourself up and putting your knees on either side of his legs before settling into his lap. Of course, because you loved to be close to your amazing boyfriend, but also to essentially anchor him to the floor. 
“So babe–” You put your arms around his neck and kissed him on the cheek to hopefully distract him. “Wanna go for a walk? Ooo! Or we could go to the movies!! You love the movies.” He laughed, but you knew you hadn’t gotten away with it. 
“I do love the movies, but I think I’d love even more if you told me why you’re so upset because of the idea of me reading that. You don’t have to tell me what it is, or let me read it of course. But what made you so upset that you had to throw it?”
It would be so much easier to lie to him if he was a worse boyfriend. But no, he had to be one of the most sweet, intelligent, caring people you knew. 
“Spencer, you know I don’t keep secrets from you. It’s not that, but–” You let out a melodramatic sigh as you buried your face in his shoulder. “If you read that you’ll think I’m so insanely, remarkably, dorky you’ll never want to go out with me again.” It was all he could do not to laugh. You were embarrassed, but you were also being completely ridiculous. The idea that anything on this Earth could make him love you less was laughable. And the idea that you would be too dorky for him? Of all people? Utterly insane. 
“Hey Y/N? Darling? Love of my life? Have you realized who you’re talking to? I love you more than anything, and the idea that you could be too dorky for me is as adorable as it is absurd.” 
“It’s an old diary… there’s– there’s yearning. For you specifically, and you’ll think I’m crazy and weird.” He laughed into your shoulder, and distracted you by kissing from your shoulder to your collarbone, before gently pulling you from his lap to set you down next to him. Then while you still had your eyes closed, he got up. He got up, and ran to go read the thing that you thought could ever make him love you any less. 
He opened up to a random page near the beginning and there it was. Everything that he thought you’d never noticed before you started dating, laid out on the page. Things he couldn’t stand about himself, you talked about with love before he’d even gotten the courage to ask you out. You thought that he didn’t like you back, and he wished he’d written down his feelings so that you could read about how he loved you before he could even think of telling you. He knew no matter how many times he told you, you’d never realize just how deeply you were ingrained in his very soul. 
And by the time he decided he was done reading, clearing half of the pages in just a few minutes, you had gotten on the bed, and buried your face –along with your shame– in the pillows. He gently rubbed your back to let you know he was done. “Hey honey? Do you want to come out of the pillows now?” And you just shook your head, not quite ready to face him yet.
“Ok, stay in there as long as you like, but for the record I would love to see your beautiful face. Now I’ve only read a bit of this, but I can say with 100% certainty that I don’t think you are weird, crazy, or dorky. I love you and I don’t love you any less because you loved me while I was too stupid and insecure to ask you out.” That finally got you to sit up and look at him. He didn’t freak out, or run, or decide that you were so totally lame that he could no longer be with you. 
“I love you too”
“Hey look at that, she’s back.” And he moved your hair behind your shoulder so that he could see your face. 
“No you tricked me with affection, you don’t get to tease me yet.” 
“You’re right. And for the record– I wish that I’d written down my feelings for you so that you could see how much I’ve always loved you.” He kissed all over your face, quick pecks to show you how much he meant what he was saying. 
“Well I’ll just have to see what secret shames are in the back of your closet, and we can call it even.” 
“Deal.”  
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11cupids-tarot11 · 5 months
Text
Late night conversations with your future spouse.
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1 -> 2
How do guys feel about the name "Love Bugs"? I've been considering calling you guys that, I think it's cute 🥹 I want to do something cool with it in the future- stay tuned guys!
In honor of reaching 100 followers I want to do something special! I want to do a follower's request! So comment down below, message me privately if you want, whichever way you prefer! This will still be a general reading for everyone, but I'm excited to see what cool and unique topics you guys can come up with!
Take care!!
- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.
I'm open for private readings! DM me!
$5.55 per question
C@sh app and PayPal payments only!
Cash tag- $minnieplant3
Tips appreciated!
Love y'all!
- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.
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Pile 1- Four of coins, The hierophant in reverse, The world, Eight of swords, The sun, Queen of wands, Five of cups.
You guys will talk about the future a lot! You guys will like talking about planning, how to save more or trips, dream vacations. Just your dream life together.
This is a moment when both of you can be in pure silence even and just enjoy each other's company, you both could have busy schedules so making time for each other might be a little rough, but at night time it's y'all little bonding moment basically.
I'm hearing something about not having to really use your brain as much lol. Maybe someone works in a field that requires them to think a lot or it's very mentally challenging or even draining so they get to finally be at rest as well, the conversations will always be light hearted and just lots of laughter and child-like energy here because neither of you really want to take this moment that serious. I'm also seeing you guys could opt for doing other activities instead of talking, like watching a movie and for some of you your person took it to a 18+ level lol.
You guys will really like to talk about how much you want to explore together, where you want to go, I think this person wants to give you the world so you'll be thinking this is just random playful talk but he'll bring it up again when the moment is right to make these dreams and talks come to life!
If you guys have had a bad or gloomy day they'll wanna talk about it so they don't feel so stuck in bad energy, they really don't want to carry it on till the next day so they'd rather talk and get all of the negative things out of the way so you both can sleep peacefully.
You both love talking to each other a lot, about everything and there's no judgement here, you guys could even fall asleep mid way sometimes because I'm seeing you one of you will be so tired (I think it's definitely from a tiring job or schedule, weekday nights will be a lot different than weekend's, weekend will definitely be longer, you guys will talk more or do more activities together because that's y'all's little bonding time! Cute 🥹.
Your person will love hearing about your day! They'll want you to tell them about everything you did. They're definitely the type to ask how your day was, they genuinely care too, they're not asking just to make conversation they'll really want you to go into details! They'll want to emotionally support you through thick and thin.
Random, but someone has a six pack? They might be shirtless a lot too lmao.
You guys will definitely use this as a moment as well to talk about anything within the relationship that you want to work on, I don't think your person appreciates toxicity so they try to eliminate as much as possible, if there is a problem or they've noticed you've been grumpy all day they'll want to discuss in details before bed, this person really hates going to sleep with low vibrations not only for themselves but for the both of you, they think you both deserve a happy good night's sleep! Adorable! 🩵
I hope you enjoyed! Don't forget to do the poll at the bottom and I'll see you later! 💖
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Pile 2- Four of wands, Ten of cups reversed, Knight of cups, The tower reversed, Three of coins and The wheel of fortune.
So this person is kinda dramatic lol. I think by the end of the day they're really tired and some days aren't able to stay up like they wish. They say they feel like a zombie some days :(
They'll still be very expressive with you, they'll explain this. They don't want you to think they're making up excuses or don't want to spend time with you or anything. I'm seeing this might be part of the late night conversation, they'll tell you exactly how they're feeling and why. This is only for certain days, it will not always be like this energy.
I think your person's kinda flirty though? Like they're keep you laughing for sure, they have a lot of passion and just like to be near you at night! You guys could end up just cuddling and sitting in silence without even realizing you're both falling asleep. It's very comfortable energy, you'll feel so good cuddling up with this person you guys might just forget about the conversation at hand and drift off, freaking adorable!
This person loves how calm everything feels with you at night, everything's peaceful and they can just relax and let loose, sleep to their hearts content. I think this pile just might really like sleeping? There could've been a thing one of you had trouble sleeping before getting together, it could just be your person's energy but take it how it resonates!! But now whoever had trouble sleeping before can sleep so peacefully so it's their favorite thing to do, you guys can't wait to get in bed to get all nice and warm and get a good night's sleep.
Maybe they'll ask you questions about what you did all day, they'll check up on you, use this as a time to get insight on you I'm hearing.
They'll want to tell you about the wacky things that happened to them out of the blue, if something funny, crazy or even slightly out of normal happens they just have to tell you! They'll gossip a lot, tell you everything! Like best friends at a sleepover.
I hope you enjoyed!! Don't forget to do the poll below, see you soon! 💕
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takes1 · 4 months
Text
final part. bratty tsukishima x manager!reader enemies to lovers
thank you for all the kind words on this series!! fell in love with writing again and the support really helps me stay motivated! hit up my requests to lmk what else ya'll might wanna read from me!
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warnings. heavy nsfw. minors DNI
details. nsfw / semi-public sex / safe sex! / m. first time / implied exp. reader / f. receiving oral / almost m. oral / mentioned handjobs / time skip / tsukki has horrible stamina / tsukki figuring out condoms / tsukki needing his glasses / needyshima / 3.5k
🤍 kei series. part one -- four here
more links. my ao3, my other stuff. request box
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"What? You don't have to do that!"
Honored that the team as a unanimous entity agreed that you shouldn't clean and lock up the gym yourself, you blinked away the unexpected backlash.
You turned to Daichi, unable to buck up the courage to address everyone, "It's really not a big deal. You guys need to rest before this thing, I want all of you to get home as soon as you can."
He turned it over in his head a few times, looking to Suga for a second opinion, while most others insisted that they didn't want you staying longer.
They all had their personal reasons. Most were only doing it to be polite, but there were also a number of idiots that wanted to train for much longer than they should be allowed to.
Logic won out and soon you were twirling the keys around your finger, waving goodbye to the most disheartened Hinata you'd ever seen.
"You can come out," You called to Tsukishima after securing the closed doors.
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He blended right out of the crowd earlier, sneaking off to the gym closet before anyone noticed his absence. It was pretty impressive how he managed to go so overlooked at his height.
From the clacking and banging that ensued beyond the closet entrance, you could only imagine he must've buried himself under some tricky supplies to remain hidden.
These desperate measures weren't commonplace; your parents were gone often, so most of the risque endeavors were kept to your bed. You made the mistake of going to his house only once, and thankfully were (mostly) clothed when his brother barged in.
When you approached, he was kicking a bucket off of his foot with the grumpiest frown on his face. It only deepened as you laughed at him.
"Ooh, was that tough?" You teased, taking his attitude-stricken face in your hands.
He rolled his eyes and let you pepper him with a few quick kisses.
"It was your idea," You reminded him, trying to make him maintain eye contact.
Neither of your homes had been a good option to see each other in lately. For a week, it was just studying together in public spaces. Though the normalcy was nice, you were both itching after the end of every practice to really 'see' each other.
His eyes flickered to match your gaze, but it was gone in an instant because he stole your lips for a gentle, long-awaited kiss. His body melted into yours, features relaxed when you pulled away.
He let you pull him back deeper into the closet, but not without some payment in return. It wasn't exactly a sexy place to be.
"This is-," You said between rushed, indecent kisses, "Pretty exciting," Your hand caught on a pile of heavy gymnastics mats to catch yourself from his clumsy pushing, "Isn't it?"
The presence of the mat did give him some ideas. Maybe it wasn't so bad.
With a bit of tantalizing force, he picked you up and smushed you against the only bare wall in the closet. Your tummy tightened and you locked around him with an uncontrollable moan.
There were a lot of things he thought to say, but didn't dare ruin how hot that was with his, at the worst of times, mood-ruining comments.
You nonverbally thanked him with a roll of your hips on his strained cock and a bold tongue against his own. He felt heavier on you, clawing at your ass under your shorts, a low groan just barely tangible against your mouth.
His tendency to get lost in these small things held the romantic in you captive- while also tending to your more animalistic impulses.
He just wanted more and more of you, and couldn't ever get enough.
It was because of this that you found it so difficult to wriggle out of his grasp, even though it was clear you were trying to take your shirt off.
You chuckled at his uncoordinated grabbing, nuzzling against your hair, and eventual drop to his knees when you unclipped your bra.
On his way down, he removed his soaked shirt off and cast it aside.
From this height he could offer his hands and mouth much easier. He never envied shorter men until he started getting neck pain from kissing you all the time.
His hands took up so much of your chest it looked a bit funny to you. At least for a moment. He pressed the flat of his tongue to a sensitive bud and sighed some preoccupied satisfaction through his nose when he sucked a kiss to the other.
His eyes were fierce and hard to look at when he was ever beneath you, it always sent a chill down your spine.
You bit back many a-sound to not let it all go to his ego too quickly. Despite this, he felt your excitement through your rapid, uneven breathing and relished in it anyway.
The imaginative idea of being on his knees was new to you-- and it gave you a good opportunity to introduce a growing interest of yours.
He was of course grumpy to be directed back up to stand.
It came out mostly in the form of his arms catching you before you could replace him on the floor.
"What- What are you doing?" His cool demeanor failed horribly.
You craved to see the way he got all huffy and sensitive again at your touch. The furthest you'd gotten so far regarding his pleasure were two brief hand jobs.
A gentle, yet firm rub of your palm on his clothed erection eased his doubt. His hold twitched into something softer and his chest puffed out.
"Relax, Tsukki," You cooed with a small peck to his jaw, "I just wanna try something."
He had horrible stamina, it felt quite complimentary to your abilities. You wanted to see how long he'd last when you were actually trying. He slowly allowed you the freedom to drop down to your knees.
There was just one problem.
He was so far away in this position. Not even just his head, which really did look like it was a mile up- but his hips were not where they needed to be.
His legs took up so much of his height, you were shocked to just now be noticing.
Confused, yet determined to make this work, you tugged on him.
"I'm... not squatting," Tsukishima bit back the humor bubbling beneath the surface just for you.
He watched you glance around the room for anything to put under your knees. A bit disinterested in finishing too quickly, he didn't allow you much time to think beyond a few more unproductive seconds.
"Probably for the best," He muttered, brought you up to stand, and glanced over your impossibly cute disappointment, "'M too sweaty for that."
It was a fair reason to be hesitant, but did nothing to ease your dismay. It was short-lived though, because his fingers flitting over your ribs gave a new intensity to your better-hidden desire.
He stepped between your legs and leaned forward, forcing you to take a stumbly step back. The back of your knees hit the heavy stack of training mats and left you no option but to sit.
For all you knew, his excuse could've been a clever cover-up to get to his preferred method of foreplay.
If there was anything he picked up the best from your weeks of scattered and fervent physical rendezvous, it was eating you out. The pride of making you cum on his tongue completely consumed him for the days following.
It was so strong at practice that Kageyama would often identify his newfound, difficult confidence in a series of angry disputes.
"You should lay down," Heavy-lidded eyes flickered over that validating look on your face that told him you just couldn't wait to be under his skilled tongue.
You fell into a rhythm whenever his courage found him again; once he believed he was good at something, he put 100% of his effort into it. This was, to your delight, one of those lucky instances.
Warm, wet, rushed kisses over your tummy preceded the skilled and subtle slide of your shorts and panties to the floor.
He knew what you liked. A rough grip around your thighs and a gentle, teasing kiss over your sex.
"So wetalready," He mumbled against you, prepping you for that addictive slide of his tongue from your entrance to your clit.
"A-ah," You failed to bite back a broken sound.
A combination of embarrassment to eclipsing pleasure left your thighs flexing against his grasp.
At the foreign feeling of something a bit hard, a bit uncomfortable, you realized--
"You're-- mmn-, glasses," You tried to communicate.
Completely deaf and unconcerned with the process or any words that didn't express how good he felt, he let your shaky, clumsy hand remove them.
He knew how to be just cocky enough to make you squirm. This gentle, endearing action inspired him to start swirling some soft circles around your clit.
"God," You choked, "That's soo fucking good..."
You rested them next to you and opted for your fingers in his fluffy blond hair.
It did help him, though. He felt them getting a bit crooked when he started, but didn't want to let you go and interrupt his flow. Now he could lean more freely.
Another rough kiss and your body curled in response- he kept your thighs, despite their straining, where he wanted them.
"Mm-!" You whined at his strength and tenderness all at once. Your mind couldn't help but wonder how that translated to his cock.
It must've been tough, since most of your bedroom activities centered around making out, eating you out once he fell in love with it, and the couple of times you made him cum with just your hand in record time.
Little to your knowledge, he was committing your visits to memory by getting off before and after. Not to mention nearly every morning now, and after the practices you couldn't be with him after. It was a pretty chronic addiction.
He lapped up the excess wet and used it as extra, completely unnecessary lubrication for his gentle, steady assault on you.
It edged you so close to finishing you had to tug him up by the roots.
"Tsukki- a-ah, I'm-,"
His chin dripped in lewd clear, his eyes bordering on mean how he squinted (blind) up at your interruption.
Ohh, fuck.
Despite hating the premature ending, even his contentious personality couldn't deny that pouty, needy expression on such a pretty face.
He only had a moment to wipe off the drool, amongst other substances, from his chin, as you pulled him in.
"I need you- so bad," You begged between hot kisses and his preferential taste for sucking just under your ear.
You heard him quite clearly stop breathing for a moment.
"Yeah?" He rasped, hardly a trace of brown in his sparkling eyes. The generous bulge prodding against you from his athletic shorts was a welcome challenge.
His body weighed on you as he smashed his lips into yours, clumsy and enthusiastic and wanton. Your legs wrapped around his waist and stirred a shaky groan from his throat.
That vivid print crammed against your pussy gave you a very bleak, disheartening reminder.
Your brow furrowed and you pushed a bit on his chest.
Highly sensitive to this small act of rejection, he took nearly all of his weight off of you at once.
Quick on the uptake though, you explained, "I-, I really do want you, it's just- I'm not comfortable doing this without a condom."
The epic battle playing in his head halted at once.
His eyes lit up wide, but his voice was as flat as usual, "I have one."
Confusion, relief, and chiefly the excitement between your legs took over all at once.
You laughed, leaning up to give him a smiley, lustful kiss, "Since when are you so optimistic?"
He returned it with an ardent, brief passion and tore himself away to collect his wallet from the floor. There was no extra inflection nor amorous implication to his words as he responded.
"Since you."
In a way, it almost sobered you up. The matter-of-fact statement was somehow new and old news, but hearing him declare it, instead of a mere suggestion, built a bridge you didn't realize you were still missing.
You got up to a kneel on the mats and pulled him in for a softer and appreciative kiss. He wore a little confused smile when you pulled away, but didn't question you.
Between you was the condom pinched between his index and middle finger. The thumb on his other hand was hooked under his waistband.
"Can you-," He looked away from you, bashful with a cute frown.
"Show you?"
A tiny nod.
There was no doubt in your mind for how you wanted to take him.
"Get on your back for me, baby," You mumbled against his lips with a fleeting kiss.
Stiff with nerves from your self-assuredness, he swiped off the rest of his clothes and put his back to the sticky vinyl-covered mat. You weren't aware of the curious tilt your head gave as you settled above him, but it spurred a whole-body shiver in him.
"You see the little rim? And how, if I turn it upside down, it's not the same?"
He squinted only for a millisecond before grabbing around for his glasses -adorable- and gave a nod when he saw what you meant.
"It's like a contact," He muttered.
You nodded, carefully picking up his hard-on enough to slide the thing on. He watched, learned, intently how you managed to do this.
"If you put it on the wrong way, it's more likely to slip off."
Your hips slid up over his now-safe dick. He was silently relieved he could feel just a fraction less with it on, because you looked too damn good perched up on him like that. No way he'd be lasting very long.
Dropping to your elbows, you gave him another soft kiss and took his glasses off again with a chuckle.
"I can't watch you?" He muttered, finding your eyes now that he couldn't see as well. That was your goal; he always gave you better eye contact when he couldn't tell his left from right.
"Mm-mm," You hummed against his cheek, positioning him against your aching pussy.
It was all on your accord to take him as you liked. He was too smart to move before he knew you wanted him to.
That didn't stop the grip on you from getting twitchy and hard, nor his unrestrained sounds.
"Augh-aha, jesus--, fuck..." Awe flashed across his face for a moment, quickly overshadowed by a deeply furrowed brow and an unwavering, adoring stare.
You seethed, eyes rolling back at his size filled you up. There was heavenly electricity he somehow pushed through your entire body. Even your fingers were buzzing.
His hip-work was a bit confused, but it was charming, slow, and good for a start when you suggested that he move.
"That feel good?" You breathed, shaky, but wanting to know all of his thoughts. As if he wasn't wearing it all over his face.
He was coated in sweat- you were, too, because there was no cooling in here, but he was distractingly so. The side of his face glistened in the orange-hued room.
"Fuc-k, ye-ah..." He wore an open-mouthed half-smirk as he admired your slick body sit up on his cock and ride him.
You kept your palms on his chest to support yourself, head leaning to the side as you focused on taking him. He kept his touch on your thighs light now, since he didn't want to risk fucking anything about this perfect performance up.
A hand slipped from his chest and to your own needy clit- you gasped and let out a quiet moan, bucking a little at the feeling.
You had no idea how much you needed it. After his tongue, the grinding, and how he started matching your own preferred pace, that thrilling, pleasant strain deep inside of you grew at an irresponsible rate.
"That's--s' hot," He choked, eyes narrowed and glued to the sight of your swirling fingers.
"Hm?" You smiled and moved both hands to the sides of his head, mistaking his admission to mean a more general vibe.
His breath stalled with effort as he bottomed out and stayed there.
He guided your hand back and pressed it between your legs again.
You sat a bit up again so you could better chase that high, tingly with an acceptable amount of embarrassment of being watched like that. You were practically edging yourself at this point and his gaze was threatening to throw you off the edge.
Those massive, sweat-slicked hands filled once more with the plush of your hips. He was struggling to keep his eyes open to watch, but managed alright.
"You-gotta teach me,h-ah- sometime," His bottom lip caught between his teeth as his focus tunnelled on the filthy sight of his own rough hold and his cock sliding in and out of your cunt.
He was a fast learner. His strokes were less shaky now, and grew more confident by the second. It may have been partially due to the fact that he knew you could take him, which just drew him closer to orgasm.
You could ride and listen to him all day, if it wasn't for your own body's limited capacity for the way he was taking you.
"Why don't I--mmn! Teach- you- ah, now?" You made him look at you again, a favorite maneuver of yours now, only just barely clawing to a paper-thin veil of poise to torture him with, over a quickly approaching climax.
"'Cause, I'm gonna cum before I figure it o-ut," Tsukishima sigh-laughed and moved one hand to your lower back.
It brought you down to your elbows. From here, he could kiss you hard and hit at a deeper angle- it was messy and rough and uncalculated; astoundingly hot coming from him.
Tsukishima never let himself act that way. It was a telltale sign that he was coming completely undone.
That hold on your hips hardened, his nails digging into you as his groans gradually started turning into whines and curses.
"F-uck--! Mmn- ha-h-ah," He cried softly on your lips as he came, panting like a dog.
Those unabashed, vulnerable sounds seized your heart and your pussy, and soon you found yourself not close behind, thanks to the fact that he didn't stop fucking you even after he came.
Shaky fingers scratched at his neck and shoulders, clinging like a lifeline. White-hot waves crashed over you as he drowned the rest of your sounds in another sloppy, worshiping kiss.
The gym was so quiet when neither of you were making any noise.
There was the hum of cicadas outside, but not even the fans were turning. It was just your laden breathing in here.
Slowly, you were able to see more of him on the backend of that shared high. Your head buzzed with the comfort and warmth his body provided you. His heavy arms squeezed around your middle.
It looked like he was swimming in satisfaction with a familiar, smug smile on his lips and closed eyes.
"Mm, you gonna look at me, pretty boy?" You rubbed the laughable amount of sweat around on his tummy and chest.
A deep shade of red returned to his cheeks. You grinned.
"Pretty?" He repeated in a scoff.
He'd come to appreciate it more, because, "It's true. You are pretty."
Sure, he sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes, but he wouldn't be so embarrassed if he didn't see a little truth in it.
It was getting a bit cold, now that you weren't so worked up anymore.
"Shit...we've gotta clean this place up."
There was a quiet beat between you.
For a very slow and hesitant 30 seconds, you gripped the rim of the condom on his still rock-hard cock and slid off of him with a shudder. He remembered that maneuver for next time.
You climbed off of the mat and began putting on your clothes. The gym around you felt 300 times bigger than it actually was.
After figuring out how to take it off without getting drenched in his own cum, he tied it and observed the thing for a second. Then, he slid -yeah, slid- to the corner of the mat and stayed seated while he watched you get dressed.
Now you had even more to put away and wipe down, because Tsukishima left a 6 foot long pool of sweat on the mat. He wore a devious smirk.
"Since I'm the one competing in Nationals tomorrow, I think I'll just leave you to it--"
"You better get your lanky ass up right now," You swatted him with your shirt and he broke out into a playful grin as he heaved himself up and snatched it from you.
Now when he stood over you, it felt thrilling instead of threatening. He fixed the twist in your bra strap without looking away from your eyes.
He kept the shirt far out of your reach while he stole a kiss, "I'll help as long as you clean like this."
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taglist:
TYSM FOR THE SUPPORT AND REPLIES!! the energy here was so great! requests are open!
@v15aexe @hotvinimon @cyzvx @aloveablechaos @kozumesphone
@beaniedoodz @idiotboys @djmoyolehuani @ilovemymomscooking
@imiqz @vierciale @sukunassaltysack @garlicbread9104 @awkwardaardvarkforever
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588 notes · View notes
p1utofairy · 1 year
Text
PAC: “you just like my sidekick, i just wanna ride…fulfill all your desires.” ♾️🕊️🖤
• what will the courting stage be like?
disclaimer ✩: 18+ mature themes. take what resonates, leave what doesn't. hope you all enjoy! p.s. don't be afraid to submit me your thoughts on my pacs.
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pile 1 💒 —
hiii pile 1 welcome to your reading! right away i'm already hearing that you and your person share similar values and morals in the sense of how a relationship should be built on honesty, loyalty and trust. your person is veryyy traditional like when you two go out together, they'll want to treat you. or if you see something you really like they'll go out of their way to make sure you have it. they'll have a strong urge to provide for you, and at first you might be a little wary of this because you don't want them thinking that you need them for everything or that you'll become co-dependent (but that's not the case at all) they just want you to know that they'll always be there for you; if you need them. as you start getting to know them more, i think you'll be more open to being spontaneous and embarking on a fresh and exciting journey with them. i feel like you're a bit guarded/protective of your heart and although you really want this relationship with them…the fact that you'll be so open and vulnerable scares you. fear not, pile 1. be willing to embrace the unknown because your person is going to value and appreciate you so much! i just heard "like the royalty you are." OKAYYYY! let it happen by tame impala is coming to mind, "just let it happen, let it happen." exactly, just relax and don't self-sabotage! your person is very secure and reliable, i feel so much comfort in this connection. when you two go on dates i can see them intently listening and giving you such intense eye contact, like they're just soaking up your every word. i can see them squishing your cheeks randomly hehe i also pick up that there will be a great balance of giving and receiving, (physical touch and receiving gifts might be their love language) ugh you two are going to make each other so happy. you both have very youthful energies, it's sooo cute. whenever you are in each other's presence it's gonna feel like it's just you two, the rest of the world will become background noise. i see a lot of goofing around, them brushing the hair out of your eyes and just staring at you all lovingly…kissing your cheeks/neck just to hear you laugh. i just heard "you make it so easy to love you." AWWW. they're almost like a love sick puppy, i can't lie. love is gonna be so evident in their eyes whenever they look at you. i can see you two just laying together…everything is quiet and still & you just trace your fingers gently over their eyes, lips and nose and they have this cute sleepy smile on their face. i'm hearing you're the "okokokok" part of see you again by tyler the creator ft. kali uchis and they're the "lalalalala" lmfaooo that's so random but so damn cute.
other channeled messages:
sitting on a park bench, get you by daniel caesar ft. kali uchis, golden hour pictures, nasa by ariana grande, floral printed dress, pisces mercury, gemini venus, riding bikes together, just the two of us by grover washington ft. bill withers
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pile 2 💐 —
heyyy pile 222 ⭐️ ooo the lovey dovey vibes are REAL omg your person loves to love you! if they could roll out a red carpet for you to walk on every time y'all step out together…they would. it's gonna surprise you how much they pay attention to little details about you so that they can surprise you with cute (i'm also hearing lavish) gifts! however, i feel like you might hold out on them in the beginning or make them sort of wait for your attention? some of you could have never been in a relationship before or have been single for a long time, and the connection is going to feel foreign at first. you're going to be navigating some pretty complex feelings/emotions but this person is willing to wait and accommodate whatever you need, even if it is space. your person is used to taking action right away, so taking a steady approach to building this connection with you will be a good balance for them. once things start moving along you'll really understand how deep their feelings are for you lol they're very direct and will not hesitate to make it known. your person has strong fire sign/leo energy whereas some of you that chose this pile give water sign vibes. when you initially meet them you may think to yourself "psh, we wouldn't work." because you two are a bit different in terms of personality, but if anything that'll draw you closer together. summer renaissance by beyoncé is playing and i can hear "it's so good, it's so good, it's so good, it's so good, it's sooooo gooood." yeah you're gonna fold pile 2 LMAOOOOO you can't resist them! i feel like they’ll give you a cute tennis bracelet or a watch and be like “here you go, it’s the anniversary of the day we first started texting each other.” 😭 so imagine when you two actually make it OFFICIAL. awww i’m hearing your gonna hit the jackpot with this person pile 2.
other channeled messages:
national anthem by lana del rey, you're so sentimental baby, fireworks, coquette aesthetic, let the light in by lana del rey ft. father john misty, lover boy era, sweet thing by mary j. blige
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pile 3 🍑 —
whatta man by en vogue & salt-n-peppa immediately came to mind, pile 3. LOL your person is gonna rock your world (i'm hearing literally and metaphorically) OKAYYY pile 3 spicy, spicy! “you so crazyyy. i think i wanna have your baby.” part of the song just played wow your person is gonna have you whipped. you and your person both have a lot of great things going for yourselves, and i think you both share that same sense of passion and ambition. i’m hearing that you’re powerful manifestors pile 3, you know how to make your dreams become your reality. this will draw your person closer to you because they are very dedicated and willful when it comes to their goals and aspirations in life, so to have a person like you match their energy will make them feel good. company by justin bieber just started playing in my mind, “can we be, can we be, be each other’s company?” lol i wouldn’t be surprised if they were scoping you out for awhile before making the first move. they’re curious about you…they wanna know every and anything about you. you’re like an enigma to them and this person is very inquisitive and open-minded. they’ll like doing things with you that stimulate their mind like taking you to museums, concerts/musicals and maybe even escape rooms. they like to have a lot of fun and make the best of life. i think that your person is very in-tune with their feelings and they'll bring a strong sense of emotional stability and care to the relationship. dare i say it, the vibe reminds me of selena gomez and justin bieber’s relationship in its prime. it’s funny because after i listened to company…bad liar by selena gomez started playing lol. “i'm tryin'…not to give in to you. no, not to give in to you. with my feelings on fire…guess i'm a bad liar.” you may play hard to get at first pile 3 because i feel like you’ve been let down/disappointed by masculine figures in your life before, and you’re hoping this connection doesn’t let you down either. don't hold past situations against them though, because they are quite the opposite. they’re going to prioritize their connection with you and always make sure that you’re taken care of. they’ll take it nice and slow with you if you want…omfg your person is such a flirt. very much nice & slow by usher vibes. love this for you pile 3, i really do!
other channeled messages:
motive by ariana grande ft. doja cat, motivation by kelly rowland ft. lil wayne, comes from a very well off/rich family, aries, libra sun, taurus moon, infj, hey peach, georgia miller and zion miller, peaches & cream by 112 ft. p diddy, ordinary people by john legend
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pile 4 💍 —
pile 4 can i just start by say that your person is so lover by taylor swift coded. “can i go where you go? can we always, be this close? forever and ever.” AHHH so cute. things may develop between you two rather quickly, there will be a lot of excitement and anticipation building up. into you by ariana grande just came to mind. this person might be a little different from your usual “type”/may not be the type of person you’d usually go for (i’d say personality-wise, cause looks-wise they’re very cute i’m hearing) but there’s something about them that’ll draw you to them like a magnet. it’ll almost make you feel appalled at how much you look forward to hearing back from them or being super excited for your next date with them. i’m hearing you tell yourself, “STAND UP!” lmaoooo y’all are so funny pile 4. your person is gonna love your sense of humor hehe you’re so sarcastic and witty. you’re gonna love how your person takes the reins of this relationship lol all you have to do is sit back and be pretty. girls need love by summer walker just started playing, “honestly, i’m tryna stay focused. you must think i’ve got to be joking when i say…i don't think i can wait. i just need it now, better swing my way.” yeahhh you’re gonna love them so much pile 4, the passion is sooooo strong. this connection will be very abundant and transformative for the both of you.
other channeled messages:
not nice by partynextdoor, confetti cake, silk red dress, 2000s rom-com type of love, infp, sleeping beauty, leo moon, capricorn rising, 10h placements, gemini or cancer mercury
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jayke0 · 6 months
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A Pleasant Surprise
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Pairing: Steven Grant x fem reader
Summary: Steven has had something on his mind for a while now, and finally he divulges his fantasy to you; degrading was certainly not on your playing cards.
Rating: nsfw, smut
Warnings/Content: sub!Steven, dom!reader, “mommy” title, degrading, grinding, cumming in pants, lmk if there's anything else I should add :).
Word count: 1,441
Credit: @automnepoet for proofreading ily.
………......................…………………………………….
When Steven had come to you with a “fun idea”, you'd expected something along the lines of ”naive uni teacher gets fucked by his student”, but this was so much better.
“Love? I have a, uh…suggestion,” Steven calls from the bathroom between brushing his teeth. “Well, it's more of a proposal, really.”
“Yeah? Go on.” You're sitting in your bedroom reading some gruesome crime novel that Marc seems to have a real distaste for.
You hear the water running briefly before your boyfriend joins you in the room, warm morning sun streaming in through the cracked curtains and casting a soft glow over his face. “I mean, we don't have to do it now of course. I know you're reading and all that, and I have to get to work in a bit–.”
You close your book and pat the edge of the bed, making him instantly respond to your gesture by placing himself down. “I'm all ears, sweetheart, lay it on me.”
Blood rushes to Steven's face as he actually thinks about saying it outloud, feet shuffling a little on the creaky floorboards. The words feel stuck in his throat now that he has to speak them, despite the fact he'd thought about the whole image on numerous occasions... and in great detail.
“Heeyy c’mon,” your hand brushes his arm, and you move closer to him to wrap your arms fully around his, crinkling his blue floral shirt. “You know I can't read your mind, Steven… Though I wish I could, that'd be super fucking helpful, then the other two couldn't lie to me.”
His chuckle makes you smile and you feel him draw in a long breath.
”I wanna like… grind against you… and I want you to mock me for it, u-until I cum… in my trousers…”
The pauses between his words are almost comical, but you look up at his face and see that he's completely serious, looking at you with wide eyes and waiting for an answer.
“Oh! Right.”
“Ah, Gods! No no... no no no no no, forget it–.” He frantically shakes his head, his hands doing the same as his face scrunches. “It's weird, I'm sorry, pretend I never said anything. Me and my big bloody mouth.”
“Steven,” you say between giggles, hand resting on his soft face to pull his gaze towards you. “It's not weird, silly! I just didn't expect you to be the one that's into degrading.” Careful not to fall back off of the bed, you climb onto his lap, thighs either side of his as you examine his expression, how gorgeous he looks with his brows knitted together and his unruly curls that Marc would definitely be gluing down with copious amounts of gel right about now.
His chest deflates as he lets out a soft sigh, resting his head on your chest out of embarrassment while you link your arms around his neck to run your fingers through the long curls at the back of his head. You feel his hands graze up your back, gliding under your night shirt and making you shiver with the warmth.
“Are you sniffing me?”
“No! Well…” he pauses, “yeah, but not in a creepy way.” The man lifts his head and looks up at you with those big doe eyes, and you watch them close as you start rolling your hips down on him slowly. You're only in your underwear underneath that shirt, but Steven is fully clothed and ready for work… or at least he would be, if his eyes weren't fluttering shut and arousal wasn't growing in his tummy.
“I promise you, darling, I like your idea.” You reassure him with your hips drawing slow circles against the material of his trousers, creating a delicious friction. “As long as you tell me if it's too much, alright?”
The bed creaks a little with your grinding before he looks up at you, nodding with a kind of desperation in his eyes that lights a fire in your gut.
“You promise?”
“Yeah love, yeah I promise.” He says, his voice a little more whiny.
You don't bother yourself with working out the psychological reasons for why your boyfriend enjoys being degraded about how long he can last, chalking it up to his masculinity, despite your reassurances that he's just as much of a man as his other two alters.
“You've got 10 minutes, think you can do that?”
Steven groans at your question, since both of you know all too well that 10 minutes is more than enough time. Still, he nods, big puppy dog eyes looking up at you and begging you to divulge in his vision.
A smirk creeps across your face when you see those glassy eyes, your gaze trailing down to the blush dusting his cheeks and the straining muscles in his neck.
“God Steven, I love the way you look at me. Look at those big soft eyes, all for mommy, aren't they?”
He lets out a whimper with the use of that title, his cock stirring in his trousers and reminding you of the thin barrier that's stopping you from grinding on the rough material of his slacks all together. The man doesn't take his gaze off of you; he drinks in every one of your features as if he's seeing you for the first time.
Rocking his hips up, he pants.
“Yes mommy, all for you, I'm all for you.”
“That's right, sweetheart, those desperate eyes are for me. that dumb little face is mine.” You lean forward and nip his bottom lip, soothing it afterwards with your tongue as he gasps and bucks his hips.
“I can feel you twitching, baby. You just can't help it, can you? Always getting so worked up and hard when I'm around, maybe I should put this pretty cock in a cage, what do you think?”
Steven's shoulders drop as he leans forward into your neck, biting and sucking any skin he can get his mouth on while his hot breath and whimpers raise goosebumps over your skin.
The suction he had in your neck is broken as his head is suddenly jerked backwards, your grip tight in his hair and making him whimper pathetically.
“I asked you a question, sweetheart.”
His adam's apple bobs in his throat as he tries to suppress his moans, his head nodding wildly. “Yes mommy, I'd– agh–I'd love that.” His hips buck again.
“Mhm.. then you'd at least last longer than 5 minutes, you'd actually be able to fuck me properly.”
Steven's mouth hangs agape, his eyes now squeezed shut as his grip on your hips tighten and he guides your hips down on him harder, wanting more, anything.
“Sh–it… Ah- Feels so good.” His eyebrows knit together in a beautifully strained way. “More, gimme more–.”
You tut with a small smirk on your lips, rocking back and forth to coat his trousers in your own arousal that's seeped through your underwear.
“Oh, look at you, you gonna cum in your pants, baby? Gonna prove how pathetic you are to mommy?” You feel the muscles in his shoulders and back tighten. “C'mon sweetheart, cum for me, ruin those pants.”
Sweet moans and whimpers tumble from the man's rosy lips as he finally lets go, staining his boxers enough that you feel the wetness as it soaks a spot on his trouser leg.
His grip on your hips loosens, but he doesn't stop whimpering, soft babbles and huffs escaping his throat as he calms down. You stroke his head, combing your fingers through his hair as your hips slow. “Good boy, you're such a good boy, Steven.” You smile brightly at him, despite the fact his eyes are still shut.
They only flutter open when he feels your hand stroking his cheek and tilting his head down.
“Are you ok, baby? How do you feel?”
His cheeks are flushed bright red still, beads of sweat sitting on his forehead from the warmth of his button-up shirt. A smile cracks across his face as he nods shyly, “I'm ok– great, yeah.. I'm great, actually.”
“You sure? I didn't hurt your feelings, did I?”
He shakes his head and tilts face to kiss your palm. “No, you didn't, love. I promise.”
His eyes drift down to the wet patch on his trousers, your eyes following as you chuckle softly.
“Should probably change…” He mumbles while resting his head on your shoulder.
“Yeah, that's probably a good idea.” You place a kiss on his neck as you embrace him, ignoring the fact that he will most definitely be late to work… again.
...........................................................................
Tags 🖤: @boredzillenial @cowboymarcs @chichimisaki @faretheeoscar @fanofstuffidk @minigirl87 @marisferasiop @red-hydra @summonthesoups @steven-grants-world @queerponcho @ominoose @mynamesstevenwithav @rinverse @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @mooksmouse @cupidysm
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starglitterz · 1 year
Text
♡ NIGHT DANCER.
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❝ nothing changed, please don't change… let's blend together, one more time. ❞ / after spending the night with you, how do the genshin men treat you in the morning after?
✧ feat ; albedo, cyno, kaedehara kazuha, scaramouche, shikanoin heizou, xiao x gn!reader ✧ warning(s) ; suggestive (esp scara and heizou) ✧ a/n ; HIII everybody make some noise for quill’s shocking once a year post!!! hope you guys like this and if it doesn’t show up in tags i will delete my account (/nsrs) anyways idk why i’ve been so obsessed w the idea of waking up next to someone (can you tell i’m critically lonely? 💀) and so this piece was born. pretend u don't notice how scara & xiao’s might seem kinda similar it’s bc i view them thru the same lens LOL ok hope you enjoy! (also ignore the scara favouritism im kinda obsessed w this idea for him KJASKJD)
please reblog + leave comments ! it helps a lot w motivation <3
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✦ ALBEDO. [ kreideprinz ]
you’re awoken by the feeling of a cold breeze caressing your skin, and as you grasp for his familiar figure, you realise albedo’s not beside you anymore. but before you can freak out, his soft voice calls to you from behind you, “good morning, dove. don’t move, i’m almost finished.” “finished with what?” you query, deciding to obey him and stay still. he doesn’t answer at first, but you can hear a faint scratching sound which almost sounds like charcoal against parchment. “and… done.” you shift in the bed, turning around to face him. albedo looks almost ethereal in the early morning light, especially when he smiles at you like you hung the stars in the sky. “i do hope you don’t find this peculiar, but i wanted to draw you while you were asleep. you looked so peaceful, and i wanted to immortalise this moment.” he hands you the paper, strands of wheat-coloured hair spilling over his shoulders, let loose from his usual half ponytail. you’re the only one who gets to see him like this, messy and imperfect instead of the flawless scientist he portrays to the rest of mondstadt. you gaze at the drawing, absorbing every detail as you try not to faint from what a sweet gesture this is, “albedo, this is amazing! you made me look so pretty.” he tilts his head quizzically, raising an eyebrow, “what do you mean? i just drew you exactly how i see you – you’re always beautiful to me.”
✦ CYNO. [ judicator of secrets ]
cyno's skin looks almost golden in the sunlight filtering through the translucent curtains. you're lying on your side, gazing at him and just admiring his features when his red eyes flutter open and he murmurs, “i might have to charge you for looking so much.” his voice is rougher than normal, deepened by sleep and it makes heat rush to your cheeks. “morning, babe-ah!” you can barely get out your greeting before he's pulling you back into his embrace, strong arms wrapping around you as he nuzzles into your neck. “cyno!” you laugh, turning around to face him, “stop it, i'm hungry! i wanna go get breakfast-” “hi hungry, i'm cyno,” your boyfriend looks at you with the most deadpan expression, and you're momentarily stunned. then you groan and throw a pillow at his head, “you're so lame!” “i'm not so lame, i just told you i'm cyno- okay, okay, i'll stop!” you collapse into a fit of giggles right as you're about to pummel his chest, “lamest ever.” “mmm,” cyno mumbles, eyes already fluttering shut again as he feels your plush warmth against him, “i'll make you breakfast, i swear, but can we just stay like this for a little longer?”
✦ KAEDEHARA KAZUHA. [ scarlet leaves pursue wild waves ]
the first thing you see when you wake up are kazuha's crimson irises laser-focused on you. the way his eyes scan your features, it’s almost like he’s tracing every detail to commit to memory, as if every morning that he wakes up next to you could be his last. “kazu? what's-” you're interrupted by a yawn, and your boyfriend's gaze softens as he looks at you. as you brush his red-streaked hair out of his face, he leans into your touch, almost cat-like in the motion, “what is it, 'zuha?” “i was just thinking... you make me glad to be a poet,” a gentle smile graces his features. “what? why?” despite the fact that kazuha is always letting praise fall from his lips like jewels, you didn't even remotely expect his answer. “because it means i'm lucky enough to be able to properly convey how you make me feel, and how gorgeous you are,” kazuha presses a sweet kiss on your forehead, then his brow furrows slightly, “but i don't think there's enough words in the world for me to speak about what you mean to me.”
✦ SCARAMOUCHE. [ kunikuzushi ]
when scaramouche wakes up, his first thought is; why does my entire body hurt? eyes still half-lidded and drowsy, he looks down and he's met with the sight of your back pressed against his torso, his arm thrown carelessly over your waist. he scrambles backwards, eyes widening with shock, and his sudden frantic movement wakes you up too. “what are you doing in my bed?!” “what the hell, scara?” you mumble, rubbing away the sleep from your eyes, “it’s too early for you to be this loud.” scaramouche’s heart is beating a million times a minute, and it’s only exacerbated by how cute you look when you’re this sleepy, not that he’d admit it to you for the world. but as you yawn and sit up, he thinks that he’s going to go into cardiac arrest. “you didn’t answer my question!” you give him a weird look, “we slept together. again. duh.” the blanket wrapped around your figure slides off a little as you reply, revealing your bare shoulder and giving him the faintest glimpse of your chest, and scaramouche’s face turns so red you genuinely think he might explode. “c-cover yourself up!” he scolds, clambering closer to drape the fabric over you again as his mind works through the haze of sleep, letting the memories of last night flood back.
realising how flustered he is, you take this as the perfect opportunity to tease him, “it’s nothing you haven’t seen before.” “shut up.” he replies curtly, but he hesitates as his fingers skim over the bite mark on your collarbone. his eyes darken slightly as he recalls last night, the messy kisses that were more tongue than anything else, his teeth nipping at your neck and finally sinking into your skin, all to mark you as his. you’ve both never officially decided what the two of you are, but you both know that he’s yours and you’re his, and scaramouche doesn’t like sharing. a playful smirk curves your lips, “remember giving this to me?” “don’t test me,” he mumbles, eyes roving over your exposed skin. his gaze dips to the still slipping blanket, hands ceasing their rapid motion to try and rescue your modesty, “i might give you more.” your arms loop around his neck, pulling him back down to the bed as you smile teasingly, “so do it.” “you’re a bad influence,” scaramouche groans, hands already moving to grip your hips, and you laugh, “that’s why you love me~”
✦ SHIKANOIN HEIZOU. [ analytical harmony ]
“good morning~” heizou's lilting voice is the first thing you hear when you wake up, and his trademark smile is already on his idiotically kissable lips as the two of you lie next to each other in his bed. “you do this with all the criminals you catch?” you drawl, trying to ignore how your heart skips a beat as you see the way his green eyes twinkle in the light. “just the ones i think look best in a different type of handcuffs,” he replies smoothly without missing a beat, smirk deepening as he notices he's left you speechless. “plus,” his hand trails across your cheek, thumb stroking your skin for a split second before his smile turns devilish, “it'd be pretty hard for me to get them to the police station if i left them all unable to walk.” “ugh, heizou!” you swat his shoulder, and bury your face in the pillow as he bursts into laughter. “but seriously,” heizou taps your shoulder gently, almost hesitantly, and you peek up from the pillow to look at him. a soft pink blush dusts his cheeks, and his eyes flicker away from yours in a manner that seems almost shy, “you're the only person i'd do this with, criminal or not.”
✦ XIAO. [ vigilant yaksha ]
waking up next to you is like a little slice of heaven for xiao. he can barely believe that he, the corrupted conqueror of demons, is able to share a bed with a mortal who borders on angelic. you shift in xiao's embrace, tucking your head under his chin almost instinctively as your eyes open slowly, “good morning, xiao. did you sleep well?” he still gets embarrassed by your proximity, so his voice is a little curt as he responds with a pink blush darkening his cheeks, “adepti do not require sleep.” “ah…” you roll your eyes, but pounce on the opportunity to fluster him, “guess that's why you always want to go all night, hm?” “i-!” xiao's face turns an almost delightful shade of crimson and he looks away, “no respect for the adepti.” “not true!” you gasp with mock offense. cuddling up against him, you stick your tongue out, “i respect alllll the adepti. but my boyfriend? maybe not so much.” “you'll be the death of me,” xiao sighs, pulling you impossibly closer. “then i hope you'll die a happy man,” you giggle, threading your fingers through his jade hair. xiao's eyes slide shut from the feeling of you playing with his hair, and he murmurs a response that leaves you speechless, “after a life with you? certainly.”
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i love them this is so soft when is it my turn // general masterlist
© starglitterz 2023. do not repost or modify in any way - reblog and leave comments if you enjoyed !
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heartfullofleeches · 6 months
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OOOO moth darling? I wanna throw my idea in too. Maybe a super kind and caring goth moth darling? Especially when they look super menacing (bcus they wear hardcore goth fashion) but their favorite game is smthn like animal crossing or they like super relaxing hobbies. (Also adonis could literally suffocate in the big tittie from his goth partner.) I hope you see my vision. PLEASE.
[Yan Butterfly + Goth Moth Darling]
Adonis is so weak for Darling.... He probably sneaks invites them into the buildings/homes he cleans for his job especially if there's been a murder or the home owners had some decor he knew they'd like. Adonis makes a fair amount of money from his cleaning gig, even moreso on contacts that are more "under the table" ergo shady folks looking to clean up any evidence left behind - but he's always spending his cash on gifts he knows Darling will like because he knows their preferred style of dress ain't always cheap.
Darling tells him they don't need it, but how can he stop when they're so kind to him? Making sure he eats, takes breaks, sleep. Butterfly boy may have worked himself to death by now if it wasn't for them. The long, grueling hours are worth it so long as he gets to come home and rest on their soft, warm ti- pillows...
-
"Brought you some sandwiches. Nothin' special, grabbed them from that gas station around the corner, but I knew you had to have something since you've been here all morning. Promise I'll grab something more filling next time"
An angel....An absolute angel gifted from the heavens above. Here you were bringing him food and checking up on him, yet you had the gull to believe it wasn't enough.
"...thanks...." Adonis shyly takes the bag from you, tensing as your fingers brush against his. You gaze around the living room as he clumsily works to untie its strings. The couch, TV stand, and coffee table had all been pushed towards the far walls - dark stains embedded into the carpet close to where the legs of the table once stood. You crouch to get a better look.
"Is this...." Your voice grows quiet - barely a whisper as you extend your hand. "Where it happened?"
"M....Mhm..." Adonis mouths through bitefuls of bread and cheese. The sandwich wasn't the best, or worst thing he'd ever eaten, but knowing it came from you made every bite heaven. He had given you some details of the incident that had taken place. A burglary gone wrong resulting in the death of an innocent man. Nobody even knew he was gone until bills began piling up. Never had many friends or close family.... Adonis wasn't close with his parents either... If something happened to him... you'd probably be the first and only to notice...
"Adonis?..."
"Y...Yeah?"
The butterfly freezes as your arms fall around him, pulling him towards your chest.
"Promise me that no matter what you'll text me at the end of every shift you have. It doesn't matter how late it is...All I care about is that you're safe."
You actually care.... Adonis has always know that, but hearing you say it out loud even if muffled by his face smothered by your chest...He knew it was an inappropriate time, but it was hard not to obsess over the contact with every beat of your heart playing like a melody in his ear. An angel, his angel. His saving grace he'll never let go.
"I will... Every night... I promise to I'll let you know whenever I get home.. I promise."
"Thank you....."
Adonis looks down at his half eaten sandwich. "...My bosses said I could take anything I wanted. I think there's still some clothes in the closet still that you might like if you're interested?"
"Raiding a dead guy's closet wasn't on my list of plans today...but I think I have enough space in my schedule."
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miniwheat77 · 2 years
Text
Sizes. (141+Alejandro x Reader.)
!CW! NSFW, gang bang, rough sex, double penetration, pretty much porn without plot, read at your own risk
Fem!Reader
(Summary): 141 decides to have reader see who's dick is the biggest after a night of drinking.
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A laugh leaves your lips as Gaz jokes with you. He’s been chatting you up for a while. A mission went a little south, everyone had been battered and bruised but everyone made it out alive. Which is the important part.
Price decided to let everyone have a couple days to themselves to heal and feel better, which meant everyone gathered up every bit of alcohol they could find and met in the lunch room to drink.
It had been a few hours and everyone was drunk. Glossy eyes, red cheeks. Lazy smiles. Everyone talked and laughed together. You and Gaz were listening in on a conversation Soap and Ghost were having, a debate. On which of them had the biggest dick.
You sent Gaz an awkward laugh. “What the hell are you two on about?” He interrupts their conversation. “We’re talking about who has the biggest dick. I think it’s me.” Soap crosses his arms. Gaz smirks. “Mmm. I think you’re wrong. I think it’s me.”
By now, everyone’s attention had been grasped. “Let’s make a bet then. Who has the biggest dick?”
“Yeah, but how are we going to know?”
"Uhhhhh. Y/N! Y/N can be the middle man, ah? How does that sound?" Soap says. “Um. Excuse me?” You laugh. Looking up from your drink.
"We wanna know who has the biggest dick between all of us." Your eyes widen. "Yeah. Me too.” Price says, walking toward the table. “Christ in heaven, you’re all just a bunch of teenage boys in adult male bodies.” You cover your face. “Come on Y/N. Help us out.” You roll your eyes. “Fine.”
------
"Alright. So.. In order. I don't know, do you want details?" You ask. "Sure." Alejandro asks.
"Alright, Ghost won by a landslide. I'm just gonna say that now. As for the rest of you. Soap and Price have almost the exact same size, Price has a little more girth on Soap, but other than that.. Alejandro and Gaz are pretty close too, but where they lack in girth they pick up in length so. I don't know. All of you are 6 inches and above."
"Soft?" Gaz asks.
"There's a woman playing with our dicks, Gaz. Full confidence I'm above 6 with a semi." Soap laughs. You roll your eyes. "Anything else you need me for? Or can I go wash my eyes out with bleach?” You laugh. All eyes are on you, a break of awkward silence. “I’m gonna take that as a no.” You laugh awkwardly, pushing passed Soap.
"Wait." Soap grasps hold of your arm. "Need ya for one more thing." He smiles, pulling you back. Each of them moving toward you, forming a circle around you. "Uh.. What is going on?" You ask. "Trying to give you a couple more sins to wash off, señiorita." Alejandro smiles. "What?" You look completely confused.
Soap pulls you into him, breathing up against your ear. "We already know what we need to know. Just want to know, which of us can make you cum the hardest.” He breathes. “I-I” you blush. “Shhh. Relax sweetheart.” He chuckles. “You’re so tense.” He breathes out, nose brushing up against you cheek. “I.. I don’t think I understand.” You breath. He pushes you back up against the table behind you, lifting you up onto it. “We’ve talked about it. A lot.” Alejandro smiles, brushing his hand up your thigh. Soap still has his hands on you. They’re all staring at you like a pack of wolves, ready to devour their prey. “I just don’t think this is a good idea,” you try to stand up but Soap pushes you back. “Relax. Nothing to be nervous about.”
“Here.” Price passes you a cup. It’s full of some kind of liquor. “It’ll help.”
Your chest raises and falls, nervousness settling into your chest. All of their eyes are on you. You stare between the cup of liquor and them. This was their way of asking for consent. If you take the cup, they’re going to ruin you.
Who are you to ruin their fun?
You take it from his hand and tip back the entire cup of liquor in a few huge gulps, flinching. Each of them getting an evil grin on their lips.
Soap helps you undress, grasping the hem of your shirt and raising it up over your head. He watches the way you start to relax into his touch, the liquor you had helping ease up your nervousness. “Lay back.” He mumbles, you obey immediately, something he takes a liking to right away. He grasps your pants, unbuttoning them and pulling them down your legs, panties going down along with them. You’re completely exposed to them, and you can hear their bodies moving around, belts coming off, clothing moving against clothing as they undress themselves around you. “Gonna ruin you, Cariño.” Alejandro mumbles, he’d moved around the other side of the table, his face near your head. Gaz stood to your left, still undressing himself. Ghost to your right, Soap between your legs. The only person you didn’t see was Captain Price, maybe he’d changed his mind. Soap slides into you unexpectedly and a gasp leaves your lips, but gets muffled as Alejandro slides himself into your mouth. You moan around his shaft as Soap starts to hammer his hips into yours. Gaz moves toward you, lifting up your hand to place it on his cock. Ghost doing the same to your other side.
For a few minutes, the only thing you hear are moans and groans, coming from each of them. They’re so touch starved that even just small brushes against you have them groaning out. Ghosts head is tipped back as you move your hand fast against him, he’s holding his shirt up over his stomach, watching the way you pleased him. Gaz is doing the same on your other side. “Fuckin hell.” Soap gasps, holding your thighs up as he fucked his himself into you. “You’re dripping around me sweetheart. So perfect.” He gasps, rubbing the pad of his thumb over your clit as you squirmed around him.
Alejandro is still fucking himself into your mouth, you’re sucking back as hard as you can and his thighs are shaking, trying desperately to hold himself together. “Little slut is good at this ah?” He smirks. Hand moving down to cup your breast, giving it a small squeeze. “Getting me close already, you want me to fill this mouth?” He breathes. You moan around him and he smiles, gripping into the table. You could feel the table shaking violently underneath you at Soap’s hard thrusts. He’s fucking into you steadily, and you can feel your first orgasm growing in the pit of your stomach. You’re wrapped so tight around Soap, pulling him closer to the edge with each thrust he took. “Shit..” he moans out, eyes screwing shut. Alejandro is holding a death grip in your hair, holding your head steady as he fucks your throat. The back of your throat would be bruised from his assault, but the only thing you could seem to thing about was Soap, pushing you closer and closer to the edge.
You’re balancing on a tight rope, and right as you’re about to fall off, Soap moans out, sliding out of you and pumping his cock. Watching you be used like this has him about to cum already. He pumps his hand up his cock quickly, groaning out loud as he finishes up your stomach and chest. You’re whimpering around Alejandro, at the emptiness you feel. Desperate to feel it again. Gaz is quick to swap him places, sliding himself into your tight hole. You moan around Alejandro again, eyes rolling back as Gaz bottoms out immediately, hips snapping into yours. Soap leans down to latch his mouth onto one of your nipples. Alejandro’s hips halt and he holds you down on him, your skin turning red as your air was cut off. He finishes down your throat, cock throbbing hard and you swallow it down quickly. A gasp leaving your lips as he pulls out of your mouth.
You’re panting, taking in breaths like the air is limited. He leans down, looking down to see Gaz fucking you. You’ve still got a tight grip on Ghosts dick, pumping him hard and fast as you’re getting filled. You try not to move too quickly, keeping your hand at a steady pace, Ghost can’t help but admire how you pace yourself even under this amount of pressure. He smiles down at you. “Fuck she’s tight.” Gaz laughs. Tilting his head back. “Yeah she is.” Soap whimpers, smiling against your skin. His lips have attacked you, leaving love bites all over your chest, sucking at your nipple until you squirmed. Alejandro is still watching Gaz fuck into you, lips near your ear as he mumbles into your ear. How good of a girl you are, letting them fuck you like this. Use you like the toy you are.
“I’m gonna cum!” You cry out, and they smile at your sudden outburst. Soap leans down, rubbing his fingers fast over your sensitive nub until you’re crying out, orgasm hitting you like a massive tidal wave. A cry leaves your lips, drawing laughs out of each of them. “That’s it. Milk my fucking cock like that. Throbbing so hard around me.” Gaz gasps. Ghost swaps Alejandro, sliding his dick into your mouth. You were nervous for when he was going to fuck you. He was massive and he’d stretch you more than anyone else. Your lips were being stretched, you could feel them splitting and cracking around the sheer size of him. He fucked himself into your throat and kept you focused on him. Ghost plays with your other breast, Soap still assaulting your other with his lips. He pinches your nipple hard, pulling a cry from your lips, smiling as it gets muffled around him. “Such a good girl.”
Your hand is working up Soap and Alejandro’s shafts, moving at a steady pace. They’re both so sensitive but enjoying the overstimulation from you. You’re covered in cum and Lube, hands had been drenched at some point. Their cocks were slick with it as you pumped them fast, squeezing with the perfect amount of tightness. Dog tags and belts rattled throughout the room. Dangling in front of you. The light was bright, dizzy from being drunk, eyes watery and blurry from being fucked so good. Gaz slides out of you, hand working the same as Soap had, until he finishes on your chest with a groan. Letting himself go. He backs away and disappears from the table, but you don’t notice. Ghost still filling your mouth full, pushing you to your limits. Alejandro is next, hands gliding up your thighs. Your pussy is pink from getting fucked, throbbing and dripping and he smiles, grasping his cock in his hand. He lines himself up with your entrance, tip pushing your folds apart as he slides in. “Fuck.. she is tight.” He growls. Saving no time to fuck himself into you. He holds your thighs with his arms, squeezing them maybe a little too hard as he pounds into you. You moan around Ghost, hand still stroking Soap. “Fucking hell you are sweet.” Ghost groans. “So fucking.. perfect, such a filthy mess.” He gasps out.
Alejandro feels a little pathetic. Maybe it’s how sensitive you’ve made him, but his high is approaching quickly. He tries to slow his hips, your free hand clutches the table in a death grip, and your hips lurch into Alejandro. “Gonna cum again sweetheart?” He smirks. Ghost keeps your mouth full, but your body shakes violently as Alejandro fucks you. “Fuck.. your tightening around me has me so close.” Alejandro groans out, pulling out of you, and just like the others, finishing in your chest, groaning out, hand getting covered in his own cum. Ghost slides himself from your mouth, Soap switching him places. You hear his heavy footsteps moving to your feet and you pant heavily. Your raise yourself up onto your elbows, watching him pump his cock, moving to your entrance. “Shhh. Relax.” Soap mumbles into your ear. “You can take it sweetheart. Promise.” He kisses your cheek, kissing your jawline and down your neck, sucking and biting at the skin there. You feel the tip of ghosts cock start to stretch you and you gasp out, a cry leaving your lips. “Ah, I can’t- I can’t take it!” You cry. “Shhh.. Relax.” Soap tries to soothe you, running his hand over your hair. “You can. You can take it, and you will. Just relax.” Ghost pushes deeper and you lay flat on the table, clutching at the sides. Tears filling your eyes as he filled you. You were fucked out and overstimulated. There wasn’t an inch of your body that wasn’t covered in sweat or cum. Your hair was damp with sweat, face beat red.
Soap could see the small blood vessels broken in your cheeks, little red spider lines covering them. Lips were split and slightly bloodied from being stretched. You were covered in love bites from him, all over your neck and chest. It was a sight for sore eyes. When Ghost bottoms out, he tears a cry from your throat, tears streaming steadily down your cheeks. “Yeah that’s a good girl, take him.” Soap mumbles into your ear. “Watch sweetheart.” He helps you prop yourself back up. “Watch him fuck you.” Soap reaches down across your chest, fingers pressing against your clit.
You’re unsure where Gaz and Alejandro have gone, probably to clean up and call it a night. You still seen no sign of Captain Price.
Soap rubs fast circles against your clit, Ghost hammering his hips into yours. “Such a pretty girl sweetheart.” Soap whispers into your ear, reassuring you and egging you on to take it further.
“So fucking tight.” Ghost groans out. Voice deep as he does. Your eyes stare down to where Ghosts massive cock disappears into you and you’re silent, body shaking each time he thrusts his hips into you. You’re right on the edge again and he can feel it by the way your push clenches tight around him, milking his cock. His eyes stare into yours, and you watch him stare at you, you can tell there’s an evil smile on his lips by the way his eyes are. “Those are some dangerous looks you’re giving me, princess.” Ghost laughs. “Looks like you wanna devour me.” You don’t say anything, don’t even move. Your eyes fixated on him as he pushes you closer and closer to your orgasm. Soap draws his hand back, but you stop him. “Damn.” He laughs nervously. “She’s really into this. Look at her.” Ghost chuckles. Your eyes screw shut. “Goddamn!” He yelps, eyes widening. You reach another orgasm, tightening and throbbing around Ghost. A mewl leaves your lips and Ghosts eyes roll back. Once he’s ridden our your high, you’re squirming from Soap rubbing at your clit. “Gotta stop, she’s gonna make me cum already.”
“Captain, you ready?” Soap pulls his hand away from you, and you whimper at the loss, Soap smiling. He returns himself, seeing Price tip back the rest of his whiskey, putting out his cigar.
He starts to undress himself and Soap returns his hand, rubbing fast circles on your clit again. “Can feel you throbbing around me. Gonna cum again, already?” Ghost looks down at you. You nod your head, cheeks still stained with tears. Your eyes roll back, resting your head on Soaps chest since he was bent down near you. “That’s it. That’s a good girl.” Soap smiles. A gasp leaves your lips and you take in another breath.
Ghost slides out of you after he’s ridden out your second orgasm, looking forward to the way you’ll have a 3rd around him. “Lay on your stomach.” Ghost says, grasping your arm. You do it immediately.
Soap passes Ghost the bottle of lube they’d gotten for this. He squeezes the bottle, getting maybe a little too much on his hand as he circles his finger over your puckering hole. “Relax.” Ghost says. You take a deep breath, looking to the side as he slides his finger into you. It’s an unfamiliar feeling, you hadn’t felt it before. You moan out as he draws his finger back, adding a second. You gasp out, clutching the table. “Oh fuck!” You cry out. “She’s ready, Captain.”
You hear heavy footsteps coming your way. “Can you stand sweetheart?” Price asks. Pulling you off of the table. Your knees buckle underneath you, and he laughs. He lifts you up, walking along with you until he reaches the chair in the corner of the room, set there in front of the large tv screen. Ghost sits down and Price helps you sit down onto him, straddling his hips, and he helps guide you back into him, a whimper leaving your lips. “I can’t take it-“ you shiver. “You can sweetheart.” Price smiles, slicking his cock up with lube. He’s standing behind you, Ghost is fucking his hips up into yours. “Just a little more sweetheart.” He reassured you, running his fingertips across your back to soothe you.
He presses his tip against your hole, your ass stretching out around him. Your body tremors as he pushes into you, crying out. When you finally feel his skin against your back, he’d slid in all of the way, your lips are parted, eyes glossed over. You’re in a different world of pleasure.
Ghost filling your pussy, Price filling your ass. You lift up on Ghost, testing the waters. Price slides back out of you, adding more Lube to slide easier.
You can’t focus. Can’t think straight. You’re panting, your skin is beat red. Your face is flushed and you can’t stop blushing. You straddle Ghosts hips and lower yourself onto him once again, feeling him stretch you out. “Fuckin’ hell you’re a minx.” Price breathes out from behind you, a gasp leaving your lips as you feel his cock brushing against your back. Ghost adjusted himself on the chair and you felt Price lining up with your ass again, leaning into the chair from behind you. You felt him slide into you, stretching you even further. The fullness you felt had your eyes watering. It hurt just a little bit as he stretched you out but the burn and feeling of fullness numbed you. You were fucked out already, unsure of how you could push your body to such limitations. You wanted them to use you just as they were, wanted to be a toy for them to use as they please. As they both began to thrust into you, you couldn’t keep quiet. Strings of moans and pleas left your lips like a poem. Price lifts your chin, forcing you to look at him. “You’ll be a good girl, yeah?” He bites his bottom lip. “Yes s-sir.” You can barely get it out. “That’s it.” He smirks. Ghost grasps a handful of your hair, pulling you up, his warm breath against your ear. “You’re our toy, ours to use and fuck as we please.” He growls. The way they stretched you, pushing against each part of you that you never knew could feel so good. “Just one more time sweetheart. Cum for us one more time.” Price mumbles.
“I can’t-“ you cry. “It’s too much!”
A deep chuckle comes from Price’s mouth. “You can sweetheart. Just one more.” He mumbles against your ear, moaning at the way you tightened around him. “Such a good girl, letting us fuck you like this. We’re going to give it to you sweetheart, gonna make you cum so hard.” Price mumbles into your ear. Ghost has his head tilted back, resting on the couch. Hands on your thighs. Price has a tight grip on your hips. Steady thrusts into you as ghosts thrusts up into you. The both of them overstimulating you. “So tight around me again. You’re close hm?” Ghost runs a hand through your hair. “Cum on my cock, you can do it.”
A sob tears it’s way out of your throat when you reach another orgasm, body shaking violently when you do. Your knees give out, but Ghost holds you up, still fucking himself into you. You’re crying, tears streaming from your eyes again. Body shaking with sobs, so overstimulated you felt like you were going to explode. “S’okay sweetheart. Do you want us to stop?” Price moves your hair from your faces. “No-“ you cry. Price smiles. “Such a good girl.” He mumbles, hips still hammering into yours. “We’re gonna fill you full sweetheart. Gonna fill this tight ass.” Price groans out. “Fuck- fuck I’m going to cum.” Ghost groans out. Hips thrusting up into you harder and faster, holding you up since you were too weak. When he finally cums, he moans out. You expected him to pull out but he doesn’t. He lowers you onto him, letting you rest your legs onto the couch as his cock throbs with each spurt of his cum that fills you until you’re dripping back out around his thick cock. The groan he lets out is sexy, your eyes rolling back as you hear it.
Price tilts his head back, cock twitching inside of you as he reaches his high too. Throbbing hard as he finishes, his cum doing the same. Spilling back out of you as he cums. He gives you a minute before he slides out of you, watching his cum spill back out of you. Ghost lifts you off of him. Price buttons his pants back up, lifting you up so that Ghost can clean himself up.
Price carries you back into your room. Your skin is flushed and abused. Pussy throbbing. You have bruises on your thighs and hips from their grips on you. Lips split and swollen. A sight for sore eyes. “Did such a good job for us dove.” Price mumbles.
“Such a good job.”
———————
I hope you guys enjoyed this, I’ll be helping dig my grave for this later XD
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mxnhoo · 24 days
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like it (h. hj)
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"a no-label relationship, how thrilling can it be?" | cover preview ׂ╰➤ hwang hyunjin x reader (ft jay, jake and jungwon from enhypen, chan, seungmin, jisung, minho) genre angst, toxic relationship, reader has long hair, toxic LAWL, aruging crying kissing in the rain (we love to see it), reader enjoys photography w/c 17.2k warnings toxic relationships (ig), arguments, manipulative, aggressive kissing (gasp!), a lot of kissing (I HOPE I DID OKAY FOR THE KISSING SCENES), hyunjin is possessive, hyunjin invades reader's privacy, hyunjin takes things without permission, hickies, slightly suggestive ig?, occurrence where the reader gets harassed/assaulted physically, fighting, cheating, THERE IS MORE BUT ILL UPDATE WHEN I WAKE UP COS I JUST WANNA POST THIS ASAP, semi-proofread
a/n finally, the fic is out! it came out later than expected, and i apologise to yall for that. this is the first long fic i've ever written and ive learnt that long fics arent for me LOL. cringed so much writing this, i literally have a love-hate relationship with this, but i seriously hope yall enjoy this because i spent so much time on it. likes comments and reblogs are appreciated, and once again so sorry it took so long!
now playing i like it - stray kids
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It was getting dark outside — the sun slowly setting, roads having slight traffic due to it being a little after peak hour, and your window blinds were closed, your living room being dimly lit from the lamp on the table and the ceiling light that was barely working.
"Don't tell me you're still going out with Jay?"
You finished tying your hair up in a ponytail before averting your gaze to Hyunjin, an expression of grimace on your face. He was resting on your couch, legs were in a manspread, his arms crossed and his head thrown back on the cushion. He returned the sour expression and all you could do was turn your head back to the mirror to touch up on your make-up, picking up the different brushes.
"Why can't I?" you retorted back, your annoyance towards him gradually growing as you start to dab the brush on your face, focusing on the small details. You two just had an argument moments before, a big reason was because you had plans with other males — well, just one, your best friend, Jay. You two also bickered about other small things, nitpicking each other’s small habits, and it all led to this.
"Because I'm here?" He sat up on the couch, his posture straightening as he locked his gaze onto you, his eyes showing fury as you remained unphased, putting down your brush and holding up your eyebrow pencil, drawing over your eyebrows. His sentiment sounded contemptuous, but this wasn't your first rodeo with him.
"Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it?" you taunted, clearly not intimidated by him as you fully turned your body to face him. The corner of his mouth curled up, raising his eyebrows as he set himself up from the couch, walking towards you until he was in front of you. Considering you were seated, you had to tilt your neck upwards to maintain eye contact with him, your eyes showing no remorse towards him.
"What will I do?" He leaned forward, his face mere inches away from yours. On the outside, you remained nonchalant about it, but on the inside it felt like your heart was going to burst out. "What do you think I'm going to do?" he threw the question at you, and you could feel your heart skip a beat. The way you two were holding eye contact so intensely made your eyes linger over his lips, admiring how plump and captivating it looked, and it didn't go unnoticed.
He leaned in, smashing his lips onto yours with no warning and you gasped. He took the chance to slip his tongue inside your mouth, two of your muscles dancing strongly against each other with strong passion. You closed your eyes and your hands slowly wrapped around his neck. His hands cupped your jaw, manually tilting your head so he could gain more access to your mouth. The passion in the kiss was so evident and it fueled the fact that you both despise yet yearn for each other so much. You slowly felt as if you were running out of breath, so your hands snake down to his chest and you attempt to push him back, but your attempt is fruitless.
This only made him kiss you more aggressively, and this was a way of expressing his frustrations and jealousy to you, since you obviously didn't want to obey him. You gradually started to feel light-headed, and he finally pulled back from the kiss, his forehead resting on yours as he looked at you with the same fury in his eyes. You panted, desperate to catch your breath as you could physically feel your heart racing. His gaze averted to your lips and he chuckled at the sight of your red lipstick being smudged, bringing his fingers up to smudge your lipstick even more.
"Forget Jay, Y/N. How could you think about him when I'm right in front of you?" his eyes softened and he pleaded, causing a pang of guilt to hit your heart. You released a sigh, your hands falling back down to your sides as you leaned back from him, looking around the room to avoid eye contact with him. "I'll cancel, okay?" you muttered, feeling guilty for making Hyunjin feel that way, as well as for cancelling plans with Jay extremely last minute.
You and Jay originally had plans to go see a movie, and you had been looking forward to it for a week, but guess things just don't go accordingly sometimes.
Upon hearing that you'd cancel, his face lit up and a wide grin spread across his face. He brought you into an embrace, his broad frame perfectly wrapping around yours as you nuzzled your face into his neck, enjoying his warmth. 
“Thank you, baby,” he mumbled, hugging you tighter and you shook your head.
“I’m still mad at you,” you replied and he only laughed it off.
You felt so complete with him, so many moments when you wanted to rip your hair out because of him but it always ended up like this. Always ended up in his arms, and no one else.
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"You signed up too?!" you exclaimed, nearly choking on your food as you kept your focus on the boy in front of you. Jay lightly grinned at your reaction and nodded his head. Loud chatters fill the cafeteria as you stared at the boy in front of you with a wide grin. Bliss filled you as you processed that you wouldn't be alone in the photography club; it's always nice to have someone familiar around.
"I didn't know you were into photography too, Y/N!" he chuckled, taking a bite out of his sandwich afterwards and glancing at you. You were so excited to finally have a mate that you could talk about photography with. Even if he was your friend for a while, you never knew he had the same interest as you. You were experienced with it, having bought your own camera a little while ago and playing around with it whenever you had free time. Unfortunately,
"Yeah! I actually bought my own digital camera a while ago but I recently lost it.."
Jay pouted upon hearing the news, sharing the sorrow you felt when you first realised you had lost it. "But it's okay! They provide cameras in the club, don't they?" you added on, lightening up the mood.
Jay chuckled and nodded, admiring how you could quickly light the mood up. You took another bite of your meal, munching it down and took a sip of your chocolate milk from the plastic straw.
"Actually, I've already been in the club for a while, I could introduce you to a few of the members right now if you want?" he offered, and your eyes instantly lit up, your face leaning closer to his. "Seriously?! Right now?! You would do that?" you jubilantly expressed, feeling euphoria run through your veins. Jay gave you a small smile and nodded, and you stood up from your chair immediately, creating a loud dragging sound from your chair which caught the attention of a few others in the cafeteria, but you could care less.
"Let's go now then!" you exclaimed, taking Jay's wrist with your left hand and your right hand still holding your half-eaten burger. Jay looked surprised at your excitement, but went along with it regardless. He was more than happy to lead you to the club room. On the way you kept telling Jay about your experiences with photography, and he shared some of his experiences too, helping you to realise that Jay was really interesting as well.
"Well, here we are!" Jay stood in front of a door, glancing at you and realising you had the brightest expression on your face. He chuckled at the sight of you being so eager and he nodded at you, opening the door and gesturing for you to enter first. You slightly bowed and mumbled a small 'thank-you' before stepping in and realising how the room was filled with about 5 people. All of them were new faces, or so you thought.
"Hey guys, we have a new member!" Jay stepped in and closed the door after himself, glancing between at his club mates and at you, flashing you a welcoming smile. From the way he spoke, you could somewhat tell that he was already close with the members, and it reassured you since it would be easier for you to make friends through him. You looked at each person one by one, noticing how each of them were at their own individual spots and giving them a friendly smile until you looked at the last person.
Hyunjin.
And he was holding the camera you mentioned about, angled at the corner of the room closest to him. The one you had lost.
"Oh?" Hyunjin said, his tone sounding amused as he eyed you up and down. You looked at him with widened eyes, not expecting him to be here out of all people. You cleared your throat and averted your gaze away from him, feeling his eyes burn a hole on you from his intense gaze. It was true you and Hyunjin had something, but you two never revealed it in public.
"Do you know her, Hyunjin?" Jay questioned, your sudden awkward behaviour not going unnoticed. Hyunjin smirked and raised his hands up as if he were surrendering, "Who knows?". You bit your lip, feeling uncomfortable at this situation and feeling like anyone would be able to infer that you and Hyunjin had something, but your thoughts were interrupted by Jay's laugh.
"You're scaring the poor girl, at least be more welcoming," Jay laughed out and walked over to the side of a boy who had silky straight hair, his hair slightly over his eyebrows and partially covering his eyes, and a black hoodie nicely fitting over his torso. You formed eye contact with the boy and he flashed you a small smile, a dimple forming on one side of his cheeks.
"Y/N, this is Jungwon, the president" Jay gestured to Jungwon, and Jungwon slightly bowed down. "Hi Y/N! I remember seeing your name in the list; just didn't expect to be seeing you so soon!" he spoke, his voice sounding like honey. He extended his arm for a handshake, and you nervously walked towards him and took his hand, firmly shaking it. You were slightly taken aback to how casual Jay was with the president of the club.
"Hi Jungwon! Nice to meet you!" you greeted him. You felt as if you were walking on eggshells, knowing very well that Hyunjin was watching your every move, and you were familiar with his outbursts after seeing you interact with other males. After the handshake with Jungwon, you quickly pulled your hand back and fidgeted with your fingers, already imagining the argument with Hyunjin in your head.
Jay helped to introduce to the rest, initiating friendly small-talk and helping you to getting to know the members. They were all pretty friendly and lovely people to get to know.
As you reached the last person, Hyunjin, you formed eye contact with him, biting your lip as the tension between the two of you became increasingly unbearable.
"Y/N, this is Hyunjin, and Hyunjin this is Y/N!" Jay introduced. You felt a lump in your throat, suddenly losing the ability to talk.
"Hello, Y/N. Nice meeting you," he extended his hand and flashed a smirk, his gaze on your hand and waiting for you to take his. You cleared your throat and nervously raised your hand up to take his hand until the loud school bell rang. While everyone else looked at the clock or at their wrists for the watch, you immediately pulled your hand down. Hyunjin watched you and slowly put his hand down.
While everybody else was distracted by the school bell and packing up their belongings to head to the next class, Hyunjin took the chance to lean to your ear and whisper, "Meet you after school".
You stumbled back, a shiver running down your spine and you were aggressively shaking your head and shooting a glare at him until he raised his occupied hand. The hand that was holding your camera.
"Unless you don't want this?" he mouthed, not voicing anything out.
You scoffed and scowled at him, giving him a single nod before turning your back on him to leave the classroom. Your eyes immediately met Jay's and you both started to converse while leaving, knowing that you two share the next class.
"Like Jay more than me?" he shot out, swinging the straps of your digital camera as he walked. You walked beside him, keeping your eyes on the camera to make sure he didn't accidentally drop it and he suddenly came to a halt, catching you off-guard and almost causing you to slip.
It was currently late evening, considering that your school ended later than usual today. You and Hyunjin were walking around in a more secluded area in the city that was still near the school, the place being dimly lit and fewer people being present.
Suddenly his body fully turned to yours, his hand lifting your chin up so you could look at him. Your eyes widened as you realised what he was doing, forming eye contact but remaining completely still.
"I asked you a question, darling."
You blinked your eyes at him in confusion, not realising that he had actually asked you a question after cautiously watching your camera that he was holding. You stuttered, "Huh? What? What question?".
"Do you like Jay more than me?" he questioned once more, his face darkening as he stared into your eyes and leaned closer. You gulped, wanting to jump off the earth as you immediately closed your eyes as the proximity increased. The weight of the question hung heavily in the air as the silence grew to be more unbearable. You slowly opened your eyes and were expecting to be met with an angry expression, but you are met with the opposite.
His eyes looked sad, and his eyebrows furrowed upwards. Your heart broke at his expression and you finally answered.
"No."
"Really?" his face lit up, his eyes blinking at you in elatedness. You were shocked to see that he wasn't angry or asking it repeatedly for reassurance but you weren't complaining. "Yeah. I like you more than Jay," you stated.
He flashed you a warm smile and cupped your cheeks, placing a soft kiss on your lips which caught you off-guard. It was almost a switch inside him flipped and he was happy all of a sudden. You felt as your heart started beating in a frantic rhythm, and blood started rushing to your face. You started to feel nervous and you flashed him an awkward smile, avoiding eye contact afterwards.
"Tell me more!" he leaned backwards, still looking at you. "Am I more handsome than him? More attractive?" he continued, clearly wanting your validation and you honestly found his jealousy adorable.
"Yes, you're more handsome than him, okay?" you reassured him, the warmth in your heart growing as your gaze went back to him. You took the time to notice his attire, his straight curtain hair parted into two different sections and a few strands of hair over his eyebrows. His looped silver earrings and necklace nicely complemented his skin tone, and his strong perfume filled the air.
He seemed overjoyed at your response, clearly wanting to hear more. "Am I the only guy in your life?".
Oh.
You blinked at him, slightly taken-aback to his sudden question. Was he the only guy in your life? I mean, technically yes, from how you two acted, but you two never.. had a label. You wanted to agree to his question, but you were reluctant. You answered back with a question, "Are you? You tell me."
He chuckled at your response before pecking your forehead and letting go of your face.
"Let's go."
You looked at him, feeling confused to where he meant but he took your wrist and started dragging you. "Where are we going?" you questioned, feeling genuinely clueless but he continued to drag you, not looking back to answer you.
"Nowhere."
You ended up in the subway with him, walking around the station as you both waited for the train to come. Your hand was interlocked with his, your arms swinging back and forth. There weren't a lot of people since it was starting to be late and the day after was still a weekday. You wanted to ask him so many things, like — when did he take your camera? When did he join the photography club? Since when did he actually know Jay?
"What are you thinking about?" he questioned, breaking your train of thought and causing you to gain back consciousness and look back at him. He had a soft expression, sincerity evident in his voice as he softly grinned at you.
"I have a lot of questions about today."
"Oh yeah? Spit."
"You had my camera the entire time?" you shot out the first question that had been at the back of your head for the entire day after you saw him in the club room. You were happy that your camera was with someone you knew, but you were confused about how he even got it. Sad too, that he practically stole it from you.
"Yeah. Took it while you weren't looking when I came over," he confessed, his tone showing no guilt or remorse. "So.. you deliberately took it without asking me?" "I guess so."
You weren't surprised, you were already used to this, just slightly upset that he didn't tell you first.
"But why?" you asked the part you've been eager to hear the most. "I wanted to make sure there weren't other guys."
'Is that so?' you thought to yourself.
"So did you find any other guys?" you asked. You knew you didn't have any photos of other guys in your camera, but you wanted to hear his response. "You're in the clear," he tilted his head upwards, giving you a downwards smile and his hair fell down to his temples from his forehead. "Must be fun invading my privacy, huh?" you wried, but at the same time you felt thrilled at the thought that he was being possessive.
He simply laughed at your comment, feeling guilty about your statement. He asked, "Shoot more questions, bet 'ya have more".
"You were in the photography club?" "Yeah." "Why didn't you tell me?" "You never asked."
Fair point.
You sighed at his comment, now realising that you don't know much about Hyunjin but it was a stark contrast when it came to Hyunjin's knowledge about you. It felt almost as if he knew everything about you, and it made you feel so vulnerable to him.
"You knew Jay?" you asked the final question.
Hyunjin hummed, indicating he was thinking before he nodded.
"You never told me you and him knew each other personally." "Once again.. you never aske—" "I know that, but you could've just said a simple 'Oh, him and I are club mates' or whatever."
You thought that Hyunjin only knew Jay because you brought up Jay multiple times and that you and him hung out in school. Jay and Hyunjin knowing each other personally was the last thing you expected, especially in a photography club.
"Well, now you know."
The train arrived, the sounds of the train railing in filling up the atmosphere in the train platform. You glanced at Hyunjin and he nodded, both of you walking at one of the doors where the train would open.
Both of you sat in the train, talking to each other and resting on each other. With your hand interlocked with his, his thumb slowly caressed yours and you felt at ease with him, forgetting about all of the relatioship's toxicity. Time passed by, both of you just sitting in the train accompanied by each other's presence as the train stopped at every stop, the cabins slowly emptying out as it became later.
There was endless chatter, laughter and bickering and before you realised, your train eventually reached the last station, the clock already striking past midnight. It was already time to go home since it was a school night, and you two had classes to attend to the following day.
Before you two parted ways, he spoke up, "Hey, about my question, what's your answer?". You flashed a perplexed look, trying to recall what question he had asked.
Oh, that question. You took a few seconds to think about it, feeling like your answer weighed heavily and required sincerity, possibly impacting whatever relationship you had with him.
Am I the only guy in your life?
"Yeah. You're the only guy."
Your response made him smile, and he took your hands into his, bringing you closer.
"It's the same for you, okay? You're the only girl in my life". Your heart melted at his words and you felt truly percepted. He continued while planting a kiss on your cheek "Goodnight, Y/N".
You watched as he walked away from you towards the opposite end of the station, entering the train which was practically desolated and your heart clenched as the doors watched, your eyes on him even as the train moves away. (You didn't want to admit it, but you were feeling upset that he wouldn't take you home, but you tried to brush the feeling away).
By the time you've reached home, it was already 3am. Upon opening your front door, you didn't even bother to turn on the lights, just heading straight to your room and flinging the door open. You felt exhausted, but recalling the quality time you spent with Hyunjin warmed your heart up (but a pinch of sadness because he didn't take you home).
You carelessly drop the bag onto the floor beside your table, a loud thump echoing through the room and you immediately shuffle your feet towards your bed, falling on it, your arms and legs widely spread as you stared at the ceiling, not even bothering to change your clothes first. Your room was completely dark, but the moonlight that entered through your window made certain areas in your room visible — though barely. Not only did you get to spend time with him, but knowing that your digital camera indeed didn't get lost assuaged your worries.
Wait.. Talking about your camera.. Did he even pass it back to you?
You immediately sat up, setting your feet on the floor before walking towards your light switch, making extra effort not to accidentally kick or trip over anything. Upon flicking the lightswitch, the sudden bright light caused you to flick your head downwards and shut your eyes. You slowly opened your eyelids as you gradually grew accustomed to the different lighting and you looked at the corner where you had placed your school bag when you reached home.
You quickly shuffled your feet towards your bag, unzipping the front pocket to see if there was anything, followed by the biggest pocket. Your anxiety grew as you slowly unzip, peeking your head into your bag. To your relief, your camera was resting nicely inside the big pocket on top of your school materials. You quickly snatched it out, inspecting the camera to ensure there were no scratches or dents, and luck was on your side because your camera was in perfect condition from the last time you saw it.
You released a sigh of relief and slouched your back, feeling as all the worry inside of you disappeared. You turned on your camera, wanting to quickly get the feeling of using your camera again after being so sure that you had lost it, and you wanted to quickly take a random shot.
Your bedroom could be considered neat. You were sitting beside the table that was at one corner with your laptop on it, a lamp and at the other side of the room was your bed, but your sheets were all ruffled up from a moment ago. You quickly shot your bedroom, hearing the camera click and a flash shooting through the room.
You pulled the camera away from your face, pressing a few buttons and quickly looking at the photo you took and smiled. You clicked buttons to see your other shots until you realised that there were photos that you don't recognise at all. And that's when you realise that Hyunjin has probably taken a few shots himself from when he deliberately stole your camera.
The first photo was a photo of.. you? And it was a shot of you talking to Jungwon and shaking his hand. This must've been when Jay brought you to the club room earlier.
Second, third, fourth shots were all him taking mirror selfies. There were more photos where he was intentionally making a stupid face and you giggled at his stupidity, your heart feeling warm that you had these photos for yourself, and you continued to click until you reached one photo.
It was a shot with the flashlight on, the photo slightly blurry. A girl could be seen raising her hand up to the camera, probably to block her face and as you inspected the photo more, you realised that there were purple marks visible down her jugular, causing you to gasp. You could physically feel your heart shatter as you continued to scan the photo, now zooming in and realising that the background of the photo seemed familiar.
You could make it out that it was Hyunjin's bedroom, and the girl was sitting up on the edge of his bed. Her hand had fully covered her face, leaving her identity unknown to you but all you could care about were the marks down on her neck.
You felt as nausea washed over you and your heart dropping. You knew that unless Hyunjin was a dickhead and shared your camera around, it had to be him who took that photo. You instantly turned off your camera and dropped it to the floor, not caring about the potential damages done to it and you just flicked the lightswitch to turn off the light. You threw yourself on the bed and nuzzled your face into your pillow, feeling as tears form in your eyes.
Tears slowly start to escape your eyes, feeling deeply betrayed by your discovery. The fact that that photo took a while to reach in your camera gallery just tells you that it's been a while since it's been in your camera, so how could Hyunjin treat you so nicely and restrict you from seeing other people when he goes out to meet people other than you? Heck, you didn't even have the thoughts to go down on Jay on the day you were supposed to go to the movies, but here Hyunjin was, marking others.
"'only girl in my life' my fucking ass, bro" you thought.
"Fuck you....." you mumbled weakly to yourself and your voice cracked as the image of Hyunjin's face appeared in your head when you closed your eyes. You whimpered, feeling as if the whole world just came crashing down and you continued to cry yourself to sleep until you eventually drifted into a deep sleep.
The bright sunlight crept into your room from your window without warning, and your eyes fluttered open as your nose felt congested and your eyes puffy. You groaned, feeling your body score and you rolled over to the other side of your bed where your phone was laying, and you checked the time.
11:28a.m.
You missed class, and typically you'd be panicking and immediately getting yourself ready for school, but not today. Today you were tired and you just needed the day to yourself — a day without school, interacting with people, and also a day without seeing Hyunjin. You picked up your phone from the nightstand and tried to turn it on, spamming the turn-on button repeatedly and realising that your phone was dead probably since you forgot to plug in your phone before going to sleep. That was probably why you didn't wake up, your alarm didn't even ring to wake you up —but it wasn't like you were going to get up anyways.
You sighed and turned to lay on your back, your arm resting on your forehead as you closed your eyes, recalling the reason you were even upset in the first place. It was such a lovely hangout with him last night and it felt as if you two became even closer, but now it felt like he was a completely different person to you.
Still holding your phone, you took a moment to reflect upon everything that has a moment and a bittersweet feeling ran through your veins. You sat up from your bed, looking around and still realising your digital camera on the floor. You set your feet on the floor and shuffled your feet towards the camera resting on the floor and picked it up, inspecting it for damages. Luckily for you it was still in perfect condition, but for now you just didn't want to use it — for now, you could only recall bad memories with it.
Walking to your table at the other corner of the room, you gently placed your camera down and plugged in your phone, seeing the charging screen. You released a heavy sigh and turned away from the devices, stretching your arms in the air and letting out a loud groan.
Did he take that photo intentionally? Were you not meant to see that photo? Would he message you and reassure you out of nowhere?
You slapped yourself for thinking about these questions. You didn't want to see him physically yet he was implanted in your mind, and it pissed you off.
Today, you were going to spend it on yourself. No one else, just you.
It was a nice day outside, beautiful even. The sun was out shining, the breeze brushing against your face and the streets being lightly occupied since the majority of the people were busy in school or work. You skipped down the street, feeling your hair blow as you smile at the different people you form eye contact with. Sometimes when other people return the smile it almost makes you forget how much your heart had been hurting. Keyword — almost. You look down at the pavement, releasing a loud sigh as the road beside you had cars driving past you at steady speeds.
You weren't just going anywhere, you were going to your comfort place. Your favourite cafe — Chronos Brews. You always bought the same pair of items, but maybe today you were going to get something different.
As you pushed the glass door open, the bells attached to the door chimed and while forming eye contact with the worker at the counter, you grinned at them. You strolled towards the counter and went face-to-face with the worker.
"Hey, what can I get for ya?" the male greeted, his Australian accent strong and your eyes shifted to his nametag that was hanging above his left chest pocket.
Sim Jaeyun.You have never seen him before, perhaps he was a new worker?
"Hey! Uhm.." you greeted and you trailed off, looking at the menu to search for something new. Once your eyes found an item you found interesting, you continued, “Could I get a New York cheesecake and a..” your voice trailed off as you eyes continued to scan the menu, “passion yoghurt smoothie?”. 
The male smiled at you and nodded, proceeding to press buttons on the cash register and looking up again afterwards. “That’ll be 11.90, cash or card?”
“Card.”
“Okay.” He smiled.
You sat on a vacant table, the cafe being emptier than usual since everyone else was at work or school. You never realised how calming it could be when you were in your favourite cafe with barely anyone else inside. Just you, the apparent new worker - Sim Jaeyun as well as another girl, sitting at one corner busied by her laptop. As you heard footsteps approaching you, you looked up and you were met with the worker holding up a glass cup containing yellow slush with a straw poking out, and a small plate which had your cheesecake accompanied by a mini fork. He set the food down on your table, and gave you a warm smile. 
“Good choice,” he suddenly spoke up, causing you to raise your eyebrows, “as in, your food choices. I like the passion yoghurt smoothie too.”
You smiled at him, “Just wanted to try something new today. I hope it’s good.”
“It will be, no worries,” he reassured, watching as you lean closer to the straw, sipping up with the drink. Your face immediately lit up, your eyebrows raising, your eyes slightly widening and a smile plastered onto your face, “You’re right, this is good”.
You continue to sip on the drink, the liquid level quickly dropping as he laughed at you. You lean back on your chair, and look at him again, “Say, I come here often but I’ve never seen you before”.
He quickly nodded his head, “Yup, just started a while ago. Usually take morning shifts, do you usually come in the afternoon?”.
You nodded your head, “Yeah I do. Makes sense why I’ve never seen you before”.
He suddenly raised one eyebrow, humming in thought. He asked, “No school or work? It’s a weekday morning” and you quickly shook your head. “I mean, I do still have school but.. Today’s my day.”
He nodded, understanding what you meant, “Well then, could I give you my number?”. You shot your gaze at him, caught off-guard by the sudden question and you raised your eyebrows. He continued, his face growing red as his eyes widened
“A-ah, not for any particular reason! You just kinda.. Seem cool, y’know? And if you need anyone to talk to..”. You laughed at him as you watched him aggressively shake his head and hands.
“Okay, sure, why not?” you giggled, handing your phone and watching as he nervously tapped his phone number, his hands slightly quivering.
After you got the new worker’s number, you left the cafe and went to different places, walking in a mall and buying things, walking in a park. It was a day out with yourself.
Must be fun, huh?
You came back home just a little bit before you ate dinner, and dropping all your bags from shopping, you immediately found your way to your room, picking up your phone and turning it on with high expectations. Your hope only crumbles when you realise that you do have notifications, but not from him. Not a single ‘Why didn’t you come to school today?’ or a ‘Are you okay?’ or if you were lucky, an ‘I’m sorry’.
Before you knew it, you were already grabbing your jacket from your closet, picking up your personal handbag from the floor and putting on your slippers, preparing to leave your house with one goal in mind - confronting Hyunjin.
He first wronged you by taking the photo of the girl, maybe it was intentional to make you jealous? Maybe it was unintentional, but you don’t know which one was first, but at this point you didn’t care. You were mad and wanted to hear it from himself, and if he wasn’t even going to reach out to you, you’re going to reach out to him first.
Standing in front of a door you’ve been in front of so many times, you anxiously knock on the wood, folding your arms as you wait for a response. Seconds felt like hours, and you felt the anxiety in you growing. Sweat rolled down your temples and you bit your lip, suddenly forgetting the words you rehearsed on the way to confront him when you actually saw him face to face.
Your head shoots up as you hear the door unlocking, watching as the door swiftly opens, revealing the man who has you wrapped around his finger. The man who puts you on an emotional rollercoaster, never once getting a break from how unpredictable he is. He looks bewildered at the sight of you, his eyebrows raising, eyes widening and his lips slightly parting, clearly speechless.
He takes a few seconds to process that you were right in front of you and finally breaks the silence, “Y/N? Why are you here?”.
You immediately frowned at his question.
Was he not going to ask how you were? Where were you instead of school? His words pricked your heart but you kept your head high, folding your arms as you lifted your head, “I saw the photo”. Features of confusion washed over him as he looked at you as if you were speaking alien language
“What phot-” “You have another girl you’re fucking with.”
His eyes immediately widened, blinking at you repetitively as he tried to find words to respond to you. “Y/N, what are you-”
“Don’t fuck with me, Hyun. I saw it in the photo in my own camera. A girl, on your bed, with hickies. You can’t tell me I’m hallucinating.” you emphasised ‘with hickies’, your chest finally feeling light as you finally let out the words you’ve been wanting to say ever since you saw that photo in the morning. 
You watch as he gives you a confused look, and it makes you feel stupid about yourself, almost doubting yourself.. “Y/N, do you seriously think of me like that?”.
“Hyun, don’t turn this around on me. I literally saw-” “Y/N,” he interrupted, his gaze softening as he tilts his neck, “you do remember I told you that you’re the only girl in my life, right?” “How the fuck is that relevant in this?!” you yelled. You quite literally couldn’t believe what you were hearing.
His shoulder relaxes, folding his arms, “I genuinely have no idea what photo you’re talking about. I did take photos on your camera, yes, but it was all photos of me, Y/N. Trust me, I never had a girl over, and if anything, the girl would only be you.”
“So you’re saying my eyes are lying to me?” “Yes. I genuinely have never taken any photos of girls, or even girls on my fucking bed. You know me Y/N, I only have eyes for you.”
“No Hyunjin, I literally saw-” “Y/N, please? I know this is serious but I’m really busy right now. Can’t you just forgive me?” He steps forward towards you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to him, his body now pressing against yours as he looks at you with a pleading expression. 
You want to pick up a fight against him. You want to stand your ground, and tell him that you know that what you saw was right. But the way he was pleading, the way his voice sounded so soft, the way he was looking at you so softly and holding you so gently, it made you think otherwise. You averted your gaze, suddenly having a pang of guilt hit you as you sucked the insides of your cheek, not daring to look at him.
“Look at me, please?” he used one of his hands to hold your chin and lift it up to meet your eyes. You looked back at him, your jaw tightened as the guilt grew. You notice how he eyes your lips and how he was gradually leaning closer and you shut your eyes, almost afraid for what was coming.
Before you knew it, his lips were on yours, however, the feeling was different. Typically, kisses with him would be intense, greedy and passionate, but this time it was slow and gentle. He was taking his own time as he slowly cupped your jaw to angle your head. His mouth moved slowly with yours, and you could feel yourself meaning.
As the kiss continued, you felt your anger for him slowly dissociate, your stomach being filled with butterflies and your chest feeling fuzzy as you finally wrap your arms around his neck to pull his face closer to yours. 
You had thoughts that you never wanted this to end, or that he was right, he would only pick you, but suddenly the image on your camera appears in your head again and it causes you to push him aggressively, breaking the kiss and his hold around you.
He looks at you flabbergasted, evidently bewildered as to why you suddenly pushed him away and you just spoke weakly, “We can’t do this..”. No matter how hard he tries, you know your eyes weren’t playing with you and that the photo was real, and you can’t kiss him or the greed for him and the pain would be worse.
“Hyunjin?” a high-pitched voice spoke out from behind Hyunjin, causing your heart to drop and your blood to go cold, already knowing what was about to come. As you averted your gaze from Hyunjin to the voice behind him, you saw it. You saw the girl in the camera, the same girl in your camera on Hyunjin’s bed with hickies all over her neck.
She had the same blonde straight hair, bangs that were slightly uneven and she was wearing an oversized shirt that you hated you recognised. It was a shirt you yourself wore multiple times.
You could now confirm that the girl was definitely in Hyunjin’s bed, and that all her hickies were definitely from Hyunjin herself. You were speechless, frozen, you were unable to do anything as your mouth remained agape, not being able to form words as your mind goes blank.
The silence between the 3 of you became extremely uncomfortable, and though no words were spoken, each second was like a knife piercing your heart and being twisted. 
You couldn't do this anymore. You can’t deal with this bullshit anymore. Without thinking, your palm swiped across Hyunjin’s cheek, a loud slap echoing the atmosphere as you scowled at Hyunjin.
You were done and you weren’t going to feel like you were just one of his toys he can use and throw away once he was bored. “Fuck you, Hyunjin,” was the last thing you said before you readjusted your bag on your shoulder and stormed away, not looking back. You could feel both of their gazes on you as you walked away, but you couldn’t care less, not wanting to face them again, or anymore. 
The only thing you could think about was Hyunjin and that girl. You were feeling so many emotions to the point it was overwhelming - humiliation, betrayal, anger. You felt so ashamed for actually believing that you were going to be the only girl in his life. So much for a relationship with no actual label, right?
Anger grew inside of you as you replayed the scene in your head repeatedly, wishing that you didn’t just slap him, but also yelled at him and put him in his place. Who was he to throw you around and treat you as if you were nothing? 
Fuck him. Fuck Hyunjin. He’s a fucking dickhead. 
You slowly tried to regulate your breathing, staring at the ceiling and occasionally shutting your eyelids as you tried to put your mind to something else. That girl can have him all she wants, and you were just done with him.
You needed to take your mind off of this, put yourself out there to forget about him, but what is there to do? Maybe you can hang out with a friend, listen to music, talk to new people, and what’s a good way to do all at once? A fun night at the club, of course.
Loud music plays through the speakers that surround the entire room, people being able to be spotted in every single corner, everyone having their different reasons for being there. Some want to hit up with others, some want to bond with their friends, some wanna have a drink, and some want to forget their miserable ex. In your case, it was all of the above.
You were walking past the crowd, trying to get past people and constantly angling your body to get through, and once you were finally at a corner with lesser people, you released a breath you didn’t realise you were holding in. You were enthusiastic at the idea of going to the club, but now that you were actually here, the atmosphere was quite overwhelming.
There were people who were literally all over each other, making out with each other as if they weren’t surrounded by a hoard of people, people vomiting and drinking, and people who were just there to dance and vibe to the music. You took out your phone from your purse, nervously checked the chats with your friend and typed to ask them what they were.
Just as you sent a message, you felt a tap on your shoulder, causing you to jump and immediately shoot your head at the person tapping your shoulder, and you release a sigh of relief once you realise it was your friend. Sim Jaeyun, the worker you met at the cafe a while ago. He nervously laughed and scratched his neck as he blinked at you, “This was the last thing I expected when you asked me to go out.”
You laugh at his comment, his presence being a sense of reassurance in an atmosphere of people you didn’t know. You smiled at him, “Is this your first time at a club?”.
He ran his hand through his hair, huffing his breath and blowing his fringe, “I mean, no, but the last time I was here I was just stuck to my friend ‘cause I had no idea what to do..”.
Your eyes lit up at his response, “Right! Like you have no clue how to dance, or if you should talk to someone new, y’know?”. You felt even more comforted that someone was exactly like you, clueless on what to do when you were in the club.
The club was famous for letting people forget their emotions, but you only felt like you confronted your feelings more in the club. He shook his head aggressively, snapping his fingers and pointing at you “Exactly that!”.
As time passes by, you and Jake start to get to know each other, like how he owns a pet dog named Layla and how he loves building legos. You also learnt that he came from Australia (which was kinda obvious from his accent) and that he’s a music-freak - he knows how to play so many instruments that you can’t even name all. You two had bought drinks and were sitting on a table, just chatting as you both got to know each other.
“Hey, I gotta go to the toilet real quick, yeah?”. You gave him a quick smile and nodded, watching him as he stood up and left for the toilet. You relaxed on your seat and sighed, feeling happy that you had a night to get to know someone new, and it felt like forever since you’ve done that considering how much Hyunjin had restricted you.
As you folded your arms and stared into blank space, you felt an arm wrap around you and you immediately flinched, trying to shift away but couldn’t. You turned and saw a man, probably in his late 20s and your stomach drops, suddenly freezing and being unable to do anything. You could tell that he didn't have good intentions, his smug smile telling you everything as he eyed you up and down.
“What’s a pretty babe doing alone in a club like this, hm?” the man said, his tone confident yet sounding so suffocating and your breath hitched, unable to form words as you just stared at the man. 
“Why do you seem so uncomfortable?” he laughed out loud and you nervously laughed, your eyes constantly blinking as you looked down to your feet, feeling so small as he pulled you closer, feeling his warmth against your body.
You wanted to push him away, you wanted to scream at him for touching you but for some reason you just couldn’t do anything. Your heart was rapidly beating as your breathing picked up the pace, anxiety starting to grow inside you as you got nervous about what the man would do to you. 
“Baby, do you like this?” he suddenly put his hand on your thigh, making you gasp and hold your breath. Tears were forming in your eyes as you bit your lip hard, not realising the cut that formed.
“S-stop..” you softly cried out.
“Why baby? Don’t you like it?” his hand slowly traced up your thigh, and you were regretting wearing a skirt to the club. You felt the tears break free from your eyes and you shut your eyes, not being able to fight back. That was until you heard a loud thud beside you and his arm on your thigh being hastily removed.
You shot your eyes open to see what happened and saw the man holding his face as he was forced to turn to you. You looked up further and saw Hyunjin, panting and his face full of fury as he held up his fist, his position as if he just punched the man.
“H-Hyunjn..” you weakly called out, and for a second his gaze softened as he looked at you but was quickly averted to the man. You suddenly forgot all your hatred for him when you saw him again.
“Get. Your fucking hands. Off of her.” Hyunjin commanded, his eyes full of rage as his jaw clenched and his fists shaking, his fingers white from how tightly he was clenching his hands.
The man simply turned his gaze back to Hyunjin, chuckling slowly as he looked at Hyunjin’s expression, scoffing at the sight in front of him, his hand touching the spot on his face that got punched. “And why should I?” the man taunted and leaned back to you, his arm remained wrapped around your shoulders and you stiffened up further.
Hyunjin smirked and cracked his neck, the sounds being loud “You better listen before things get fucking messy, old man, now get your hands off of her. I won’t repeat myself again.”
The man shook his head and laughed, “Look man, I’m not trying to-”.
And before you knew it, the man got punched again and you gasped at the sudden action, your hands flying to your mouth. You noticed how there was now blood flowing out of the man’s nose, and that Hyunjin was tilting his neck and pulling up his sleeves, his eyes almost looking psychotic as he rubbed his fists, his gaze fixated on the man and watching his every move.
You looked at the man and he looked like he lost his mind, his grin so wide and he started to laugh uncontrollably, his head slowly turned back to Hyunjin. His arm slithered away from you and he stood up from the chair, walking up to Hyunjin. “Do you fucking know who you’re messing with?” the man threatened, his head tilted and Hyunjin simply stared down at him. 
Suddenly, Hyunjin grabbed his collar and heatbutted him, “Look, I don’t give a fuck about who you are, you touch my girl again I’m fucking killing you, got it?”. You were afraid that a fight was going to break out, but the man simply pushed away, lifting his hands as if he was surrendering and he shook his head, “I got you man, no need to be so fucking sensitive”.
The man was about to pat Hyunjin’s back to form a truce but Hyunjin gripped his wrists tightly and only glared at him, his glare being enough to tell him to fuck off and the man simply went away, glancing once more at you before he disappeared into the crowd.
“Y/N” he called out to you, his eyes still being full of fury as you stared at him. Deep down, you still hated him, but given that he just saved you from that situation, all you could think about was how grateful you were to him, how much you wanted to go back to him, how much you wanted him again. You stood up from your seat and walked towards him, saying nothing and pulling him into a tight embrace.
Upon coming into contact with you, he froze but after a few seconds you could feel his hands rest on your back, slowly caressing you as you found comfort in his hands, almost wanting to burst out crying from the situation you just experienced.
“Sorry, is this your boyfriend?” a voice spoke out and you immediately pulled back from the hug to see Jaeyun. Your eyes immediately widen and you start laughing nervously, not knowing how to respond. Hyunjin stepped towards the guy, clearly feeling threatened, “And who could you be?”. 
You immediately step in, “Hyunjin, this is Jaeyun, Jaeyun this is Hyunjin”. You nervously smiled and scratched your neck. Jaeyun was smiling at Hyunjin while Hyunjin was glaring at him. You realised that you needed to thank Hyunjin, and also that you and him needed to have a talk.
“Ha..ha.. Jaeyun, let's meet again another time, thanks for tonight,” you said as you grabbed Hyunjin’s wrist and started to pull him out. You looked over your shoulder as you started to walk out, watching as Jake smiled and said his goodbyes.
Once you and Hyunjin were out of the club, you and him stood under a streetlight, and you were now face to face with him. As you looked at him, you noticed his stern expression still being present. “Who is he and where did you meet him?” he questioned, his tone evidently displeased.
You were taken aback by how pissed he sounded, your anger for him slowly returning and overpowering your gratitude for him, “Now why does that matter when you literally had a girl over just a while ago, huh?”.
Hyunjin groaned while running his hand through his hair, biting his lip, “Look, I know you might not believe me but I broke it off with her?”.
“And how am I supposed to know if you’re lying or not?!” you yelled.
“I swear this time. I kicked her out that very day you saw her, blocked her and even broke it off.” he said, his tone sounding serious but you had no idea if you should trust him or not. 
“Look, you’ve lied to me once and you can do it again, Hyunjin,” you stated, your heart aching.
“No, please, I understand why you’re mad at me, and I’m a fucking dick for it, Y/N, but please just trust me this one time,” he pleaded, his gaze softening as he took a step towards you, his hand moving upwards to hold you by the waist but you slapped his hand away.
“Hyunjin, trust me, I really want to trust you, but I don’t want to constantly get disappointed and hurt again,” you spat out, “Do you know how hurt I felt when you literally lied to my face and that girl just appeared right behind you?”.
“And do you know how angry I felt when I saw you with that guy?!” he snapped, causing you to flinch. He noticed and his gaze softened, “I-I’m sorry-”
“I don’t give a fuck Hyunjin, you hurt me so much, do you think I care if you’re angry?” your voice cracked and you could feel tears welling up in your eyes as you relive the pain you felt just a while ago.
“Please Y/N, give me another chance, I promise you I won’t hurt you again,” he pleaded, sounding desperate as he took another step closer, your bodies almost touching as he looked at you. 
He continued, “Don’t.. Walk away from me.. Don’t walk away from me.. please..?” 
You shook your head, biting your lip, “Hyunjin.. I really don’t know..”. He cupped your cheeks and his eyes softened as he saw your hurt expression. He caressed your cheeks with his thumbs, his eyes looking at your facial features. 
“I’ll do anything it takes to earn your forgiveness again, please?” he pleaded once more and all you could wish for was your heart to stop beating so fast so you could think straight.
“Okay,” you replied, but it came out as a raspy whisper. “Can I.. kiss you?” he questioned, his eyes already on your lips as he slowly started to lean closer to your face. You nodded your head, afraid that you were making the wrong choice, but your heart longed for this, your heart longed for him, and at this point you weren’t even thinking about the consequences.
As his lips finally landed on yours, you felt the tears break free from your eyes. He angled his head for more access to your mouth and your hands grabbed his shirt, slowly pulling him closer. The kiss was hesitant, Hyunjin probably afraid you would’ve pushed him away or reacted negatively, but once you responded, he released the breath he never realised he was holding in.
His mouth moved so tenderly against yours, mouths moving in a similar rhythm as he tries to show you how much he loves you without any words. His hands slowly slithered down to your waist and pulled you impossibly closer, feeling his warmth against you and you could slowly feel yourself losing to this kiss.You knew you’d only get hurt over and over again if you were with him, but being with him just feels so right. His lips complemented yours so well, and the way you both always ran back to each other just proves that the feeling was mutual. 
You felt yourself growing breathless so you tapped his chest, signalling to pull back but he interpreted it different and only kissed you harder, causing you to form a muffled whimper as he kisses you more passionately, his lips moving more vigorously and he ran his lip on your bottom lip, silently asking for entrance and you obey. Your head was feeling fuzzy as he continued, slipping his tongue into your mouth and your tongues fighting in a fiery battle for dominance. He finally pulled back, panting heavily as he rested his forehead on yours and stared into your eyes intensely.
“Tonight, stay with me, okay?” he pleaded, his eyes soft as he continued to pant, his lips agape. You nodded, your heart about to burst from how fast it was beating. You stared at him, noticing the bruised spot on his cheek from your slap and you caressed the spot lightly, feeling guilty for it
Few days after the incident at the club, you and he became close again, reverting back to your old non-labelled relationship, your kisses being more passionate and your greed for each other being increasingly evident.
Today, he wanted to have a game-night with his boys and also invite you over, wanting your presence around him even as he hung out with his friends.
Maybe he was improving, since back then he wouldn’t even want to bring you near his friends from the fear of them finding out that you two were a thing.
Maybe now that he was more open to his friends seeing you and him together, he was serious about you, and maybe he’d be asking you out soon. Who knows? 
Your heart flutters at the thought, thinking about all the different ways he would ask you out. Maybe he was going to do it while the other boys were around. Maybe another day, and he’d gift you a bouquet of flowers? Maybe a romantic dinner - the list goes on and on, but you just couldn’t wait to make it official with him.
Game night he said. His friends were sitting around you on the couch as 4 of them hold up Switch controllers, all of them yelling at each other as they stare intensely at the screen, trying to get the task in the game done.
In the room there was Chan, Minho, Jisung, Seungmin and of course, Hyunjin himself. Since there were only 4 controllers, everyone but you and Seungmin was playing, and you just awkwardly watched as they continuously shout random call-outs to each other. Seungmin was to your left, and Hyunjin was to your right, your legs in physical contact.
Being aware that Hyunjin was too occupied with the game, you looked at Seungmin who was attentively watching the screen, and feeling your gaze on him, he quickly looked back at you to form eye contact. He gave you a small grin and greeted you, “Hey Y/N”.
You knew Seungmin but never really talked to him even in class since he was always around other people. At other times, he was around Hyunjin, and you and Hyunjin never really talked publicly for.. many reasons, of course. This was the first time you actually had the opportunity to talk to him properly, and you mirrored the smile, greeting him back.
“Hey, Seungmin”.
You knew that even if he hung out with Hyunjin who could be a bad influence, Seungmin’s kind heart still remained, and your impression on him always remained positive from the times you see him in class. “How are you?” you questioned, feeling less awkward as you finally find someone to chat to while the others are busy with their game.
“Been okay, just been having my usual baseball practices, class been tough lately, you?”, he replied, the soft smile never leaving his face. You looked around the room and hummed like you were thinking and you shrugged, “Just been the same, I recently managed to find my lost camera so that’s great”. Upon saying that, you glanced at Hyunjin who was still chaotically playing his game, holding his fist up to cheer once they managed to finish their mission. 
“Is that so? Must be nice finding something you lost,” “I agree,” someone to your right voiced out, feeling an arm wrap around your shoulder as they pulled you closer. You looked to your right and made eye contact with Hyunjin, him giving you a smug expression as you glared at him since he was the culprit.
“Say, wanna play Y/N? I bought a new game earlier this week, I think it’s pretty fun” Hyunjin questioned, his smug expression never leaving his face as your eyes softened, and you slowly nodded your head, “Why not?”.
Next thing you knew, you were holding the console and chasing after Hyunjin in the game. Apparently, the game name was 'Cops N Robbers’, and you scream at him from all the tactics he uses to juke you. The game setting was in prison, and you were the cop while he was the robber. There were snickers from the other boys who were also playing, finding it hilarious how naive you were to games and how Hyunjin could easily trick you. 
“Y/N, don’t you think this reminds you of us?” He suddenly blurts out in the middle of his laughter. Still furious, trying to chase him, pressing the buttons aggressively “What the hell do you mean? Just get back here!”.
Hyunjin continued to laugh, “Like how you always chase me, y’know!”.
Your fingers stop moving on the console, taking the time to straighten your posture and look him in the eye. He sensed your gaze on him and he did the same, leaning back on the couch to give you his mischievous expression that you had a love-hate relationship with. Your face turned sour as you immediately understood his implication, and the corner of his mouth curved up while raising his eyebrows.
��It’s not one-sided, Hyun, it’s mutual,” you stated, your tone dead serious.
Hyunjin simply smiled, his eyes practically lighting up, “I know.”
You excused yourself after a while to use the restroom, needing a moment to yourself and as you finished washing your hands, you walked down the hallway and heard the other’s voices while wiping your damp hands on your shirt. You felt uneasy as you recalled the conversation you had earlier with him. ‘Like how you always chase me’  ‘I know’
So he knows that the two of you are after each other. Wouldn’t that mean that there is something special then? Maybe.. there is a need for establishment?
You stared into blank space, their voices gradually getting louder as you get closer, their words falling on deaf ears until you heard something that stood out to you. 
“Are you guys seriously not going to get together?”
You feel your body turn cold and you instantly halt to a stop. You stopped breathing as if they would be able to hear you, and you slowly shuffled your way closer to be able to hear their conversation better. You peeked into the living room, seeing the back of their heads while seated on a couch, still playing. 
You saw Seungmin avert his head to Hyunjin, “Yeah, seriously, the way y'all look at each other is insane.”
Seungmin wasn’t wrong. Your eyes then went to Hyunjin, though it was only the view of the back of his head, hopeful that his response would be something you wished for.
“Why do we need a label?”.
Oh. He continued, “Her and I are fine as we are now, we don’t need a label.”
Your heart dropped, shattered, sunk. His words were like a knife that just stabbed you in the heart, and it definitely was the opposite of the response you desired. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t hurt, but maybe he was right. Maybe a label is not needed, maybe you were just too expectant.
You instantly turned your back and sprinted back to the toilet, not caring if you were making noise. Tears welled up in your eyes, but you were not about to cry. Not now.
The boys had probably noticed your presence from the sounds you made as you shut the toilet door shut, looking into the mirror and turning on the faucet to wash your face.
One half of you was telling you that you should stop hoping, while the other half was telling you to establish what the both of you were,, and it was the only thing you could think about.
Fuck it. You’ll ask him later. 
You stared at your own reflection on the mirror, the features of worry taking over as you bit your lip, praying for the best. If not, you were praying you’d be able to take his response well. You didn’t know which was scarier - losing him or yourself in the process.
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“Hyunjin, don’t you think you’re too obsessed with that camera? It’s literally all you ever hold nowadays..” Seungmin grumbled, holding onto Hyunjin who was trying to pull his arm back. Seungmin pulled Hyunjin into the crowd of people, loud music blasting from the speakers that were placed at every corner of the place, people dancing and getting all over each other.
It was a sight that Hyunjin wasn’t unfamiliar with, but a sight that he wasn’t that uncomfortable with. The room was slightly dark, the disco lights flashing rainbow colours and Hyunjin sighed, wishing he was anywhere else but at the club. 
“Now why’d you drag me here again?” Hyunjin grumbled, looking around the room, probably finding something he could photograph. He brought the camera to his eyes, angling it around to find something that could be photographed, whether it was the crowds of people dancing, or the sofa area where people were getting messy with each other.
“You’re such a fucking loser, y’know? Stuck in your room all day, get a girlfriend for fucks sake,” Seungmin hissed, sick of his best friend having an image of a loser. 
“What’s the point? Relationships are so troublesome,” Hyunjin complained, still shifting his body to find anything to photograph until his camera is directly pointed to you, standing at one corner, talking  to one of your girl friends and he accidentally snapped a photo, the flash turning on and he immediately tried to cover the flash with his hand, bringing the camera down frantically.
“Who’re you taking a photo of?” Seungmin followed the direction that Hyunjin was looking at, his eyes landing on you laughing with your other girl friends and he sighs.
“No one, it was an accident,” Hyunjin spat out, clearly flustered that he almost took a photo of a stranger. 
“Are you interested in her?” Seungmin suddenly questioned, causing Hyunjin to choke on hair, putting his hand on his chest as he tried to stop coughing. Seungmin shook his head and patted his friend’s back, helping him to let all the air out.
“It’s okay to be interested. I’m kinda grateful you found something else other than your camera interesting for once,” Seungmin teased, watching Hyunjin recover and stand back straight.
Hyunjin cleared his throat, “Who is she?”. Seungmin smirked at his question, “That’s Y/N, she’s in the same class as me.”
“Is that so?” "Yeah, you like her?" Seungmin turned his neck to him, smirking at the boy. "Yeah."
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After Hyunjin said goodbye to the boys at his apartment door, the sounds of the door closing and feet shuffling towards you could be heard. Your eyes were closed, head resting against the cushion of the couch as you folded your arms for extra warmth, and you felt a weight sink you down on the couch beside you. You felt an arm wrap around your shoulders, pulling you to lay on their shoulder and you inhaled a familiar scent, a scent that drove you crazy without fail.
You opened your eyes and looked up at Hyunjin who had his gaze locked onto you, his gaze dark as he scanned your features slowly. Your eyes, nose, lips, and he also studied your behaviour, noticing how you mirrored his actions and how your chest was rising up and down at a slow but steady pace.
His expression was unreadable - as usual, and the amount of thoughts that fill your head became overwhelming. No words were spoken, and you had no idea what was going to happen now that you and him were alone. So many questions you wanted to ask, and you were so afraid that if you said the wrong thing, he was going to slip away. 
“What are you thinking about?” he spat out, finally breaking the silence between the two of you.
You hum in thought, thinking about the right words while looking into his eyes, your eyes flickering to his lips every once in a while and you finally respond, “Us”. It took a lot of confidence for you to confess that, and you bit your lip anxiously, almost instantly regretting it as you thought about how he would react to it. 
The way your eyes constantly flickered to his lips didn’t go unnoticed, and the corner of his mouth curves up, his hands snaking down from around your shoulders to your waist,  bringing you to closer proximity as he leaned in, “What are you talking about, Y/N?”. 
His hot breath hits your lips, his eyelids halfway closed as you finally shoot the question that you’ve been dying to ask, “What are we?”.
In almost an instant, you could feel the mood of the atmosphere change. Hyunjin's breath hitched, leaning backwards and he looked at you, his expression still unreadable.
You loved how handsome he was, but you absolutely despised how you could never read him, never predict how he felt or what he was going to do next. Your eyes fell on his lips, watching how it was opening and you were anticipating his answer.
“It’s late, you should go home,” his tone shifted, sounding cold and distant. “What?” you looked at him, your eyes widened as you felt bewildered at his response. Is that even considered a response?
“You must be tired, let’s talk soon, yeah?” He moved back, removing his arm around your waist as he folded his arms, his gaze averting to the light above the two of you.
“Hyun-”
“I’m tired, Y/N, I can’t bring you home, sorry, I’m going to sleep now, goodnight.”
You watched as he stood up from the couch, the weight beside you disappearing. He was so evidently avoiding eye contact and he started to walk towards his room. Before he could step into his room, you stood up and blurted out, “I heard your conversation earlier!”.
He suddenly freezes, a few moments of silence before he turns around, his eyes finally meeting yours. “It’s not important, I don’t want to talk about it,” he firmly stated. This time, you could tell that he looked uncomfortable, angry even. His eyebrows were furrowed and he was sucking the insides of his cheeks, his jaw clenched.
This sight of him was like another knife added to your heart, and you bit your lip as you slowly nodded, “Okay.”
You didn’t know if it was appropriate, but you spoke up, “Goodnight, Hyun.”
You turned your back on him, picking all your things on the couch before pacing for the door, and as soon as you stepped outside, you slammed his front door shut. Once you were outside, you exhaled as if you were holding in a large amount of air and you leaned against the door, rethinking about what you just asked.
The thing you just asked may have just potentially ruined your entire relationship and you wanted to beat yourself up for it, wanting to turn back time and keep your mouth shut, but whatever’s been done is done, and you just have to wait and see what happens.
Before you knew it, it was the start of a period where he didn’t contact you. Like, at all.
Heck, he even avoided you like the plague. On campus whenever you’d see him, he’d notice you then turn the other away, pretending like he didn’t see you at all. You’d go to the photography club to see him more often and on days you were lucky, he was there, but he’d be occupied talking to someone else.
You’d patiently wait until he was finished conversing with the person but when he was done, he would find an excuse to leave as soon as possible. And every single time he did, he had this unpleasant expression on his face. It was the same one you saw the night you dropped the question on him, and you watched him slip away from you.
With Hyunjin practically gone from your life, you had more free time to hang out with Jay, but everytime you were with Jay on campus, you’d always catch Hyunjin staring at the two of you in your peripheral view, immediately looking away once eye contact was formed.
If you were going to be honest, you felt like shit. Were you seriously in the wrong for wanting to establish something? Wanting to make things official?
The first few days, you cried your eyes out, burying yourself in your blanket and feeling regretful for asking him in the first place. You constantly checked your phone for any notifications from him and reread your past chats to relive the past emotions. Once you even called him on accident, your face going cold but before you could drop the call, he had already rejected it.
Talk about brutal. 
When Hyunjn was gone from your life, your life became peaceful, but was it really peaceful when he intentionally did it without warning? You eventually accepted it, limiting the amount of times you open your chats with him and looking out for him in the hallways. 
3 weeks fly by, and you were so convinced that you’ve moved on from him - except you didn’t.
You tried finding the spark in other guys, like Jay, but your heart never melted for him the same way it did for Hyunjin. Your eyes never scanned the room for him like you did for Hyunjin, and you never checked your phone for his notifications like you did for Hyunjin. 
What made it worse was that even with Hyunjin avoiding you, he was always somehow around you. Always. 
In your favourite cafe whenever you were about to leave, you’d feel someone’s gaze on you and when you look up, you'd accidentally make eye contact with someone and it would've been him. He was definitely watching you the entire time you were there and you remained clueless about it.
Another time when you were eating lunch with Jay, you saw him at the corner of your eye, watching as he sucked his inner cheek and clenching his jaw. 
You felt so many emotions. You felt upset and humiliated because you realised you were being toyed with, longing because you missed his touch and also satisfaction from the way he seemed jealous whenever you were with someone else and that he was always watching you.
It was as if you won the game, having him wrapped around your fingers and following you around like a dog, watching your every move. No matter how much you were in love with him, you were satisfied that you were getting under his skin and getting a reaction out of it, you loved seeing him pissed. It was difficult, but it used up every muscle in you to not lose self-respect to contact him again, whether it was by approaching him in real life or texting him.
You were sitting in front of your mirror, the air conditioner on, windows shut and the room dimly lit as you do your skincare, your thoughts drifting to Hyunjin when you suddenly get a notification.
As you swiped up a fair amount of moisturiser from the container into your index and middle finger, you looked at the direction of where your phone was facing downwards and shrugged it off, thinking that the message can be attended to after your self-care session. You applied the cream on your face, ensuring that each area on your face had equal amounts of it when your phone ding-ed again.
And again.
You raised your eyebrows and rushed to spread the cream evenly on your face, curious to who could be messaging you at this time at night. You hurriedly wiped the remaining cream on your neck as you quickly picked your phone up. You were expecting a spam notification from one of those brands you forgot you subscribed to, or maybe a message from Jay or Jake, but it was one you were never expecting.
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : hey im outside
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : open the door 
Your eyes widened as your head shot forward in disbelief. You didn’t know if he was joking and was about to just turn your phone off until another one came in.
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : please
Next thing you know, you swung your apartment door open to reveal a Hyunjin who was panting, probably from running, his leather jacket wrapped around his wide figure and you eyed him up and down, not believing the sight in front of you. You knew that you were going to see him again, but you never expected it to be at his own accord. Your jaw dropped slightly, your eyes scanning his entire figure.
“I’m cold, can I please go inside?”
Still slightly confused, you nodded your head slowly and moved aside, gesturing for him to go inside and he gave you a small smile, stepping in and you closed the door as he entered. You watched as he removed his shoes and placed it at the rack at the spot he usually places it.
Without looking back, he stepped into your living room as if he hadn't ignored your existence for  3 whole weeks.
You quickly followed behind him, watching his every move. It almost felt unreal that Hyunjin himself was in your living room, walking around. He set himself down on your couch, a loud sigh leaving him and he pursed his lips, looking up at you. Eye contact with Hyunjin wasn’t new, but with the thing of him ghosting you, you almost thought you were dreaming. You stared at him with your mouth slightly agape, your eyes not blinking even once as he chuckled.
“Why.. are you here?” you finally mutter out the question that confused you the most.
“I missed you,” he replied with no hesitation.
You were taken aback at how easily he could just show up at your place out of nowhere and just admit he misses you after ghosting your entire existence for a long period of time. 
“What the fuck?” you blurted out, features of disgust taking over you.
“Look, I know I ignored you, okay? But-” “Yeah, you better have known you fucking did.”
He sighed, looking down and leaning forward, his arms resting on his knees and hands clamped together before continuing, “I just needed time. Time for myself.”
“For what exactly?” you shook your head in disbelief.
“I don’t know, my head was just.. Kinda all over the place,” there was a moment of silence before he continued, “I’m here because I want to make it up to you.”
“I’m not forgiving you so easily, Hyunjin. You threw me away too easily for 3 whole weeks.” “You’re counting?” “Of course I am, dipshit!” you shot and he only shook his head, a playful smile on his face indicating he wasn’t taking you seriously.
“I know it won’t be easy, but just give me another chance, hmm?” he pleaded, his eyes lighting up as he looked up at you, flashing a small pout. 
You cross your arms, biting your lip as your mind gets flooded with so many thoughts. You wanted to forgive him, but you were afraid he was going to throw you away again. You wanted to shut him out, but you feel empty without him. “You can’t just leave and expect me to accept you into my life so easily,” you shot, feeling overwhelmed that you had to make a decision.
He stared at you in silence, so many thoughts behind his eyes before he suddenly held his hand up, “Let’s go on a walk”.
You tilted your neck, “Are you crazy?!’. You turned your head to look at the clock hanging near you, “It’s literally past midnight, Hyunjin!”.
“I know,” he replied, with no emotions in his voice. “I’ll bring you to eat your favourite,” he added.
“It’s cold outside,” you gave another excuse. He immediately unzipped his jacket, discarding it from his body and offered it to you. You shook your head in disbelief, “I just can’t-”.
“Please? Pretty sure your favourite cafe is still open, and I know a few photography spots if you wanna bring your camera along,” he asked again, his words so tempting. You sighed, not believing what you were going to say next, “Fine”.
That night, he brought you out to Chronos Brews, treated you to anything you wanted and you two eventually started to talk again, though you had your guard up.
You brought your camera and he really did bring you to a few photography spots that were amazing despite it being night time. You did this once.
And twice.
Thrice.
A fourth time wouldn’t hurt right?
He was now the one frequently messaging you, double-texting (sometimes even triple) and calling you at night just to hear your voice, and facetime you just to see your face. He even brought you flowers on a random occasion and you two went to school together, frequently heading to the photography club to chill together afterwards and hanging out afterwards. It was like how it was before, but you saw him even more frequently and you had no idea if it was a good or bad thing. But as long as your heart feels happy, right?
Frequently when you were with him, you’ve always felt a bit scared that he would just slip away again, part of you thinking it was because you asked the question but you tried to brush it off, thinking that you were just overreacting and that you should just be happy with whatever you have now. 
Everything is so perfect now, why ruin it because of your overthinking?
You laid in his bed, his arms wrapped around you as he gently caressed and patted your back, his touch making you feel sleepy. The past few days have been amazing. Hyunjin was now doing everything that a boyfriend would do - bringing you more flowers, playing songs on his guitar for you, calling you every night just because he wanted to hear your voice and see your face, acting intimate with you even in the public eye.
He surely seemed more serious about you, wanting to show everyone that you belonged only to him, glaring and threatening anyone else who showed signs that they wanted to hit on you or even befriend you. You looked up at him, the way his eyes were closed and his bangs were covering his eyebrows, looking so peaceful.
You could tell that he was gradually falling asleep from how his hand movements got slower and weaker, and you only stared at his features, softly giggling to yourself about how cute he looked. His chest rose up and down slowly, his body completely relaxed with you in his arms and you could only wish that you and him could stay like this forever.
Sitting on his couch, your eyes were glued to his bare back as he stood at his kitchen sink, washing the dishes after you and him had eaten dinner together. You softly smiled, feeling comforted by his presence, finally feeling like he wanted you as much as you wanted him.
“Hyun,” you softly called out, and he hummed in response, his head slightly turning over his shoulder as he continued to wash the dishes.
“Come here, quick,” you pleaded, wanted to feel his warmth again and he chuckles, nodding his head but not sparing a glance at you. You observed as he finished washing the dishes, placing the plates on the drying rack and washing his hands before he turned his back, eyes forming eye contact and he approached you with a small grin on his face.
He sat himself beside you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you to his chest, “Miss me that much?”. You giggled and nodded your head, ruffling your head into his neck. 
“Hyun,” you softly called out, your heart starting to beat faster as you mustered up courage to shoot the question again.
You continued, “Can I ask you a question?”. He hummed, caressing your shoulder with his thumb, and you shot your gaze at him, looking at him with doe eyes. 
“What is it, Y/N?” he smiled down at you, his eyes filled with affection. Looking at how comfortable he was, it warmed up your heart and made your chest feel fuzzy, butterflies filling your stomach and you couldn’t help but feel that your feelings were being properly reciprocated. 
“Promise me you won’t get mad?” you asked, suddenly feeling hesitant. You had faith that he wouldn’t get angry anymore from how much the two of you have been bonding the past few weeks, but you still felt dubious since you remember how fast he switched up the last time you asked him the question. You were afraid he was going to slip away again, but you were hoping that this time he’d react differently.
“As long as it’s not that one dumbass question, I won’t,” he chuckled and your heart instantly dropped. Your smile started to fade and you blinked at him in confusion,
“What ‘dumbass’ question are you.. Referring to?”.
“That stupid ‘what are we’ question or whatever you asked last time,” he spoke, the smile on his face remaining which caused your heart to shatter. Even after all this time with you, he still didn’t want to establish anything and even called the question ‘stupid’.
You immediately pulled away from him, features of hurt on your face as it was now his turn to be confused, the warmth he felt from you slowly disappearing. 
“What’s wrong?” he asked, and the way he was so clueless made you feel so irritated, “Oh..” he now understood your reaction, “Don’t tell me you were going to ask that shit again..”.
“I don’t see what’s so ‘stupid’ about it, Hyunjin” you spat out, frowning your eyebrows as you felt a knife stab your heart.
“No-” he seemed flabbergasted by your response and scoffed, “I don’t see what’s so important about knowing what we are, Y/N,” his words twisted the knife in your heart, and you clenched your fists, your fingers turning paper white from how tightly you were clenching them, “Can’t we just be happy as we are? Don’t you think it’s fun?”
“It’s not fucking fun, Hyunjin!” you snapped, and his eyes widened, taken aback that you raised your voice at him. He stared at you, his jaw dropped and his eyes darkened, his eyes expressing how infuriated he felt.  You continued, “I’m worried every single fucking day that you’re going to just suddenly slip away one day, Hyun,” you bit your lip and your voice started to crack, “Why don’t you want the same thing? After everything?”.
He took a deep breath and turned away for a second, huffing air afterwards and causing his bangs to fly up. “Do you realise how much of a clingy, annoying bitch you sound right now?!” he yelled, causing you to flinch. Your eyes widened as you realised what he said, bewildered that he could say such degrading words to you. You both stared at each other, the weight of the air being heavy and the knife in your heart twisting even more now.
“Clingy.. Annoying.. Bitch?” you repeated, your voice soft and in disbelief as you still needed to process what he said to you.
“I thought you were different, Y/N, it was more fun when you weren’t worried about all these shitty things,” he continued, and you shook your head. “Since I’m not so fucking different, then I can just walk out right now, can’t I?” you stood up from the couch, your body still fully facing him as you kept your guard up in case he tried to do anything to you. 
“Fuck, just go! I don’t give a fuck!” he yelled and you could feel tears forming in your eyes, but you weren’t crying. Not right now, not in front of him. You weren’t going to let a dick break your heart and make you feel sad. You flashed him a hurt expression and almost in a snap, his facial expression softened, “Wait- Y/N- I didn’t mean tha-”
“I’ll go since you want me gone so bad,” you stormed to his room to take the bag that was laying on the floor, looking around to ensure you left nothing behind. He quickly followed behind you, trying to get you to look at him, “Y/N, please look at me”.
You ignored all his pleads, not even sparing him a glance as you walked past him out of his room, already heading straight for the door. He grabbed your wrist and you stopped moving, “Please, I didn’t mean that Y/N and you know that”.
You flicked his hand away from your wrist, turning your body to look at him, tears already breaking free from your eyes as you shouted, “I’m fucking sick of being treated just as one of your toys! I’m done Hyun, I don’t wanna see you anymore!”
“I’m sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean it-”
“I’m done. I’m done with.. whatever we have!”
You turned your back to him, heading straight for the door. This was the moment you’d never thought you’d be experiencing so soon. You were so afraid of the day that this was going to happen, and now that it happened, you had no idea how to feel. You opened his front door and looked at him one more time before stepping out and slamming the door shut. 
The day you left, he tried to contact you multiple times, whether it was call, text, going to your house, approaching you in school, but you brushed him away every single time. You didn't want to deal with his bullshit anymore, but he wanted you to let you understand his perspective. The last time you saw him, he mentioned a time, date and location. You had the choice to go, but you didn't know if you were going to meet him. You didn't know if you were ready or if it was worth hearing it.
That day eventually came, and you were just hugging your pillow, all cozy in your bed. Your phone vibrated and you lazily rolled over your bed to pick it up and see what notification you received. Your heart aching when you realised it was from him, a feeling you were so familiar with.
hwangjin : hey
hwangjin : you remember we're meeting up right?
You knew that if you went, it could possibly be the end of everything. A part of you was so afraid of what he was going to say. You were about to turn off your phone until more notifications came in.
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : i'm really sorry, okay?
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : i really hope you come
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : give me a chance to explain myself
hwangjin ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ : okay?
You received another notification which broke your train of thought.
Weather Alert: 🌧️ Heavy Rain Expected! 🌧️ Get ready for showers! Rain is expected to start within the next hour and continue throughout the evening. Make sure to carry an umbrella and stay safe.
"Y/N!" the familiar voice called out to you, and you scanned around the cafe until you spotted the figure that was aggressively waving his hands and looking at you.
You sighed at the sight of him, not looking forward to the conversation you two are going to have. You took your time to walk to him, dragging the chair opposite of him and sitting yourself down, his eyes locked onto you and watching your every move.
You set your eyes on the table, realising how all your favourite items from the menu were nicely set down and you looked up at him, noticing his guilty expression.
"I.. bought your favourite!" His voice sounded nervous, and you looked at the classic New York cheesecake that was served on a nice small rounded plate, accompanied by the usual passion yoghurt smoothie that was packaged in a plastic cup, a small amount of whipping cream overflowing from the hole of the dome lid.
You raised your eyebrows at him, praying that whatever explanation he had would be convincing enough and make your anger for him perish.
You pick up the small fork that was resting on the plate and stab the cake, putting the cake to your mouth and chewing. You didn't say a single word, you wanted him to do all the talking so you could evaluate to see if he was even being serious about wanting to clear up the misunderstandings you both shared.
You savored the sweet taste that filled your taste buds as you continued to eat on the cake, patiently waiting for him to speak up.
"Y/N..." your eyes travelled to his, raising your eyebrows as you anticipated what he was going to say. "I love you."
You dropped your fork to the floor, creating a loud metallic sound across the entire cafe. You received glances from other people, but they quickly went back to their business. You blinked at Hyunjin in disbelief to what he had just confessed, and your mind that was overflowing with thoughts suddenly cleared up.
His confession didn't particularly make you feel overjoyed, just shocked. You'd be lying if you said you would have expected this.
"You.. love me?" you blurted out, still feeling taken aback by his sudden confession when you were expecting him to do anything else, like apologise or whatever.
"Yes. Yes I do," his voice sounded serious. You were never expecting the day that Hyunjin, your situationship, was going to be direct with his feelings and not fucking around.
"How so?" you shot out, curious as to his reasons on why he 'loves' you. A soft thunder accompanied your question, adding more suspense to the situation.
He looked slightly taken aback by your sudden question before he cleared his throat and looked around, blood rushing to the tips of his ears and a hint of pink flashing.
"I.. love the way you look so gorgeous" he hesitated, but he looked relieved after mustering up the courage to voice it out. You didn't feel satisfied one bit. You only felt annoyed at his answer, scoffing upon hearing it. "Okayyy? That's all?".
He seemed slightly puzzled as to how the first reason wasn't sufficient, but he cleared his throat and continued, "I like the way you kiss me.. hug me..". You rolled your eyes, not feeling a pinch of sincerity in his words and you sat back, folding your arms.
"Are you serious right now?" you scowled. Even a kid in elementary school could show more sincerity than Hyunjin, and this thought made you just want to slap him and leave him.
"Why wouldn't I be, Y/N?" he asked, giving you the puppy eyes before you roll your eyes once more, the annoyed feeling slowly turning into irritation. You spat out, "Let's be serious, Hyunjin. You're only with me for fun". A louder thunder was followed by your words, the sound of rain dropping commencing.
His facial expression immediately showed that he felt offended, and he defended himself, "If I was only with you for fun, I wouldn't be thinking about you every fucking second!".
'Now that's what I'm talking about.' you thought.
He continued to rambled on, "I wouldn't be imagining you while messing around with other people, or—"
"Okay, so what are we?"
He fell silent but he continued to stare at you, noticing the grimace on your face. He finally spoke up after a while, "We're friends".
'Ouch,' you thought.
"So we're friends that hug, kiss and get jealous over each other?" you contradicted his statement, your tone filled with sarcasm.
"Friends with benefits?" he stated, almost sounding confused and it made you want to scream at him.
"No.." you stood up from your chair, taking your belongings and he mirrors your actions, immediately standing up and panicking and feeling puzzled as to why you were preparing to leave. "Y/N—"
"No. I don't want to do this anymore." you stated, tears slowly forming in your eyes as you shot a glare at Hyunjin. He bit his lips and seemed unsure of what to do, and this sight of him broke your heart even more.
You picked up your bag, storming out and upon opening the front door of the cafe, you soon realised that it was pouring heavily, but it was the least of your concerns. You stepped out into the rain, feeling the cold water hit your skin and you shivered at the contrast in temperatures from inside and outside of the cafe.
You heard a voice behind you, "Wait, please!". You knew it was him, and it took every part of you to just not turn around and just continue walking, but you were forced to a stop when he gripped your wrist tightly to prevent you from walking even further. "Please.. can we just please talk?".
"I'm just.. so fucking confused! What the hell are we?!" you cried out, throwing his hand and turning your body to him, your tears continuously running down your cheeks but blending with the raindrops that fell onto your face. Your face wrinkled up, feeling so furious yet the emptiness in your heart yearning so much for Hyunjin.
Hyunjin's gaze softened at you, his eyes showing remorse as he cupped your cheeks, pecking your forehead before resting his forehead on yours. You continued, "I don't see a point in this, you already stated clearly that we're just friends with benefits, you don't want a label, but that's exactly what I want, Hyunjin".
"You love me, and I love you, so I don't see why it's so hard to—" you rambled on but your words were quickly put to a stop when he placed his lips on yours. Your hands immediately snaked up to his scalp, grabbing his hair while he cupped your cheeks, pulling your face closer to him. The kiss was slow and intimate, and it was almost like all your problems and misunderstanding vanished in one second.
The rain continued to pour, both of your bodies getting increasingly drenched but it was a problem that didn't bother you and Hyunjin. The warmth that was filling your bodies was sufficient, and the burning desire for each other only brought the two of you closer.
He tilted his neck in desperation to gain more access to you. He softly nibbled on your bottom lip, silently asking for permission for you to open your mouth, and without any reluctance, you opened your mouth.
Your tongue is immediately met with his, and they are swirling against each other. He took this chance to explore your mouth, your heart slowly melting at the passionate kiss. Blood rushed to your faces, both of your faces being a bright red as you both were desperate to sate your desires for each other.
It was obvious, you two were made for each other. Regardless if there was a label or not, you both always ran back into each other.
He softly pulled away, his eyes locked onto yours as he beamed at you. You returned an annoyed smile, and you ran your hand through his dripping hair, slicking it back.
"Please just tell me, I don't want to just be your 'maybe', Hyun," you stared into him, your gaze intense.
"For all I know, you aren't just a 'maybe', Y/N," he replied.
There were a few moments of silence before he continued, "I'm scared, Y/N, I really am," he tucked a hair that stuck to your face behind your ear, the raindrops never stopping to drench your bodies, "But I wanna figure it out with you, please".
You shook your head, not feeling completely satisfied but you were feeling happy that he was honest. He finally opened up to you, and you felt like it was a big improvement.
You two stared at each other for a moment, and you chuckled at the sight of him, warmth filling your heart as you felt like everything had changed. Realising that you were chuckling at him, he stuck his tongue out at you, and pecking your cheek afterwards, holding you oh-so-gently.
"Don't hurt me again," you said, but it came out as a raspy whisper and he slowly nodded.
"Of course," he replied. "I love you," he blurted out and it caught you off-guard, but you quickly composed yourself and chuckled at him, squeezing his cheek, "You're so adorable, you know?".
"Don't tease me, god,"
"I love you too," you replied. "I know you do"
And he pulled you into another kiss.
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taglist! : @chwesuh-imnida @hyunlvrs @aft2rsexs @laylasbunbunny @neosracha @axhyyy @zennnnny @superbbananananana
@tsunderelino @skzdedgf (just thought you'd like to get tagged!)
236 notes · View notes
catboyieejeno · 1 year
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nct dream reaction ₊˚ପ⊹
➸ the dreamies as boyfriends.
alt title: the dreamies are boyfriend coded—that's all.
content: gn! reader, fluff, slightly suggestive, mentions of food
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masterlist
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ mark lee
mark is very easily flustered in general, so what is he supposed to do when the prettiest person ever is just simply existing in his presence? just remembering you're in the room and stealing a glance your way awakens the most teenage-boyish feelings within him, tips of his ears red and nerves bubbling as if he isn't already in a relationship with you
he's endeared by the most minute gestures and quirks of yours, the ones that go unnoticed by others. like your little huff when you're frustrated or the way you scrunch your nose when you're not satisfied or contemplating something
they way you randomly squeeze his hand when you guys are walking will drive him up the wall. this man will audibly gasp or squeak, clutch his chest, and squeeze his eyes shut to recover from the way his heart is suddenly and fiercely pounding in his chest
he's constantly geeking out over you, though he doesn't gush to the dreamies too often. they'd just make fun of him and tbh he doesn't wanna hear it, but on occasion he'll talk to jaehyun or johnny since they're close and more than willing to lend an ear
can only go so long without a kiss from you. i give him maximum two hours (sometimes sooner) before he's looking into your eyes in that way that tells you he's going to kiss you
his hands would come up to hold your face and his lips would mold into a soft, doughy smile before pressing into yours. it's delicate and lingering, and he breathes you in every time, hands only leaving your face to wrap tightly around you and hold you close to his chest
would do the typical 'wipe the corner of your mouth with his thumb' when you're eating together or pick an eyelash from your cheek, holding it up and insisting you make a wish and blow it away so it comes true
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ huang renjun
we know renjun has no filter, but i don't see him being too frequently outspoken about his feelings with/towards you; he's slightly reserved in this regard because giving cheesy compliments feels slightly foreign and awkward and he doesn't thinks it's something he's good at
initially, that is.
that reservation lasts up until the moment the most unplanned, instinctual, and heartfelt "gosh, i could look at you forever," leaves his lips.
he didn't plan to make you flustered; in fact, he didn't even plan on saying it out loud. he was just obliviously voicing his thoughts, but once he saw the flush of red that spread across your cheeks, eyes dreamy and wide with surprise, renjun questions how he ever went a day without being the reason for this look on your face.
huang renjun pays so much attention to detail when it comes to you, whether it's about your favorite food/restaurant or your coffee order or the different scents/products you like. you'll literally never have to repeat yourself with him, he's always listening very closely and noticing all the small things about you that no one has ever picked up on
he's so gentle and considerate, an 'actions speak louder than words' kind of guy. constant acts of service, making sure you keep up with meals, helping with chores, naming and watering your plants, etc.
and, undoubtedly, he's definitely the best out of the dreamies at taking care of you when you're sick.
now... he will wear a mask and wont kiss you until you're 100% better
or at least until he's sure you're not contagious
but you can bet this boy is making you fresh tea and soup daily, checking your temperature every thirty minutes, rubbing menthol on your chest and running you a bath + sticking a towel in the dryer so it's warm when he wraps it around you and gets you ready for bed
will not leave your side until you make a complete recovery
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ lee jeno
his natural resting state is his face tucked into your neck or shoulder
before he's even opened his eyes on an early morning, his face is nuzzling into yours, lips nibbling at your neck, plush and wet and leaving the lightest of kisses on your warm skin. he's completely enveloped by your scent, lulled to sleep for a bit longer by the sounds of your even breaths
if you're standing in a queue or at a party, he'll rest his cheekbone onto your shoulder, both arms wrapping around your waist. occasionally he'll leave a kiss on the nearest accessible spot of exposed skin, but since he's the shyest member (according to the dreamies), he might not do much more in regards to PDA
hand holding is a must though, especially when it's cold and your linked hands are tucked into his jacket pocket. so cheesy but you gotta let it slide bc it's lee jeno
loves to help you pick your outfits/shop with you... loves it.
has absolutely all the patience in the world, and will watch you with stars in his eyes as you style yourself, nervously offering his opinion every so often
will ask you to get up from your seat so that he can take it and pull you onto his lap instead. 7/10 times he'll get hard but can you blame him...
speaking of laps, please let him nap on yours :( jeno will pout and beg for a chance to sleep on your thighs or tummy, insisting that the quality of his sleep is drastically improved when he's on you. also, it's implied that he wants you to massage his scalp and play with his hair... will be out within five minutes if you do
and if he were to stir awake and the lights in the room were too bright, he'd tiredly drag your hand over to rest on his cheek and shade his eyes so he can keep sleeping
would absolutely love if you showed an interest in any of his hobbies
for example, he'd be so giddy if you let him teach you how to play a video game, holding your hand over the mouse and keyboard and pressing your fingers down on the buttons as he mutters instructions into your shoulder
or if you wanted to ride bikes with him or go to the gym with him, he'd be so attentive and watchful over you, making sure you have a good time doing the things that he likes
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ lee donghyuck
the partner privilege is real with this one
like, he'll be actively feeding you a bite of his food and another member would ask to try it, and he would immediately complain (even though he eventually gives in anyway) just because ugh! it's not the same as letting you have some, you know?
and on the topic of food, when you try his, he will be feeding it to you. no, he will not let you do it yourself so don't even try it—lee donghyuck lives and breathes for the way you roll your eyes in feigned annoyance before accepting the spoonful he so meticulously prepared for you, cheeks stuffed because it was probably too much. he'd even coo at you, going on about how cute you look and asking how you like the taste
will feel betrayed if you watch an episode of a show you're meant to be watching together without him. and while he's on tour or stuck at the dorms, he will facetime you so you can watch it together
he's genuinely so enamored and obsessed with you, in a way that might not even be entirely normal or sane. loves laying on your chest so that he can hear your heart and yes, he will shamelessly ask you to scratch his back, humming contently after each drag of your nails on his skin
cannot seem to get enough affection, ever
also cannot seem to get close enough to you. if it was possible, he'd merge into you to be closer but since it isn't, he'll just have to settle for cuddle sessions where he's wrapped around you like a koala, leg swung across you and pinning you in place.
he's a little dependent when he's with you, so he has a bit of a hard time when he's on tour. hyuck needs to talk to you and hear your voice and he will do anything and everything necessary to make that happen, whether it's staying up ridiculously late, or getting up before the sun to match your schedule. when he's away, he misses you so, so bad that it literally and physically hurts
and he's so soft on these phone calls, constantly reminding you that he misses you and your voice and your touch
he'll endlessly tell you that he loves you, all teasing and jokes aside—he can go back to doing all that when he gets home. for now, he's rambling about all the things he did that day that you would have liked and promising that he will bring you there one day
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ na jaemin
the honeymoon phase never truly ends when you're dating na jaemin. he is the biggest flirt, and i do not say that lightly
compliments and teases you like it's second nature because it is. he's constantly trying to swoon you and is not at all shy about skin-ship, clinging to you when he feels like he needs a bit of extra loving.
i think people underestimate how romantic jaemin is because he tends to be a bit subtle about it, and contrary to popular belief, i think he'd only really pull that side of him out in private, only for you to see. he's not particularly against PDA, just prefers to soak you in when the two of you are alone and together
slow kisses that hide how eager and enamored he really is, fingertips softly grazing all the way up your arms until they disappear into the back of your hair. it's insane how every kiss feels like the first with him, just as exciting, giddy, and warm.
if he has to get up before you for practice or schedules, he'll leave a kiss on your forehead before literally tucking you in, promising to be "back home and in your arms before you know it!"
when i say na jaemin would do anything to make you happy... that is not at all an exaggeration
movie night? you can pick the film and snacks. a couple's trip or vacation? he'll have you make a list of everything you wanna do and follow it through to the very last detail. an argument or disagreement? you're always in the right. if he so much as senses it's escalating, he'll quickly apologize. whatever it is you're fighting about, it's not worth upsetting you over. genuinely has so much love for you, he doesn't ever want to see you unhappy.
learns the recipes to your favorite foods so that he can make them for you whenever you want/crave them
if you were comfortable with it, he'd shower with you every single day, it's literally his favorite thing
and it's not even sexual half the time bro :( i mean... unless you wanted it to be
it's his fingers slowly scrubbing the shampoo into your scalp, hands massaging your upper back and shoulders, applying your facial cleanser and drawing shapes into the foam on your cheeks and forehead...
will 100% hog the hot water, though
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ zhong chenle
uses humor to flirt with you
even when he's mad at you he's still cracking jokes lmfao
kind of mean when he's playing around, but he knows to never take it too far. he doesn't actually want to hurt your feelings, he only wants to convince you that he's not as infatuated with you as he actually is.... although sometimes he slips up lol
like, he'll be gawking at you with so much love in his eyes, then suddenly crack a joke or poke fun at you. it might be quite confusing for an outsider, especially since after he's done laughing at you, he'd lean in and peck your cheek as a wordless truce. you're used to it by now though, and it's honestly kinda sweet because you know by now that pestering is his own way of showing you that he loves you
will pretend to ignore you so that you're forced to ask him for attention because he likes feeling needed/wanted by you
chenle is the personification of the phrase 'dating your best friend'. there's no one who makes you laugh quite as hard as him, or who knows you as well as he does. and, even at times where he isn't the most directly affectionate, he's still following you from room to room as you go about your day, dramatically dragging his feet bc where are you going without him :(
if you praise him for any reason at all, you've immediately turned him into putty and rendered him incapacitated—his cold front has been breached, and no amount of shrugging or 'tsk'-ing from him can hide the grin on his face or the way his eyes have softened and molded into hearts
your approval means everything to him, and he'd never tell you, but he'd constantly worry if he was enough for you or if you deserved better
when he is in an affectionate mood, you can expect lazy kisses just about anywhere. he gets in these moods when he's sleepy, far too tired to keep up his cold act, choosing instead to nestle himself in your warmth and soak in everything that is you.
instead of playing with his ring to go to sleep, you find that he frequently falls asleep, quietly snoring, with the material of your shirt clutched in his hand
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ park jisung
is touch-starved and it shows!
but the idea of outwardly asking you for affection terrifies him, so every time you perform any kind of skin ship, he desperately tries to express how much he likes it by smiling at you or leaning into your touch in hopes that you catch on to the fact that he loves it and he loves you and he wants more
eventually, as he grows more comfortable in the relationship, daring to initiate some touching of his own... as soon as he reaches this point, you realize there's no stopping him
he'd pick up the cutest little habits like spontaneously kissing you mid sentence because he just can't help himself or wait until you're done speaking bc he just needs to kiss you now or he'll die
that, or he'd catch himself playing with your fingers as he listens to the sound of your voice or while the two are laying down and you're telling him about literally anything
his thumb will be brushing ever so gently over your wrist, knuckles, and fingers as he hums to ensure you that he's still listening, his deep voice making his chest rumble under your cheek
but his favorite habit he's developed by far would be having you curled up on his lap, and it's not even in a sexual way or whatever
genuinely, he's never felt more at home
jisung busies himself caressing your soft skin or playing with your hair as you both mindlessly talk about random topics
and all of a sudden he's hyperaware of the situation and his heart swells up with love + a brush creeps up on his cheeks because hahaha wdym you're sitting on his lap rn??!?!?!
and if you glance up at him, fully expect him to get more flushed and hide in your shoulder
constantly buys you your favorite snack but eats most of them before you get around to trying them :( but like you can't even be mad
overall very soft and baby and just about anything you do makes him fall in love with you again
⋆ ★
1K notes · View notes
suplicyy · 4 months
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"Wanna Be Your Muse..."
Artist!Reader x Karasuno [Part 2]
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Summary — He discover by chance that you love drawing him, maybe even too much...
Characters — Tanaka, Ennoshita, Sugawara, Asahi, Daichi.
— Fluff
— Gn! Reader
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You've been together for a month now, and him going to your house and vice versa was starting to become a routine. That day, he was the one who went to your house to spend the afternoon.
You were in your room watching a series, when you said you were going to the bathroom and left the room, leaving him alone there. While you were gone, he watched your room, looking at some posters on the wall, books on the shelf, a notebook open on his desk... – a notebook? - he thought. You usually left your desk tidy, so it was rare to have anything "dropped" on it.
He knew it wasn't good to see your things without permission, especially when you weren't there to let him or not, but he thought about taking the notebook and putting it on the shelf with the others. So when he went towards your desk to get the notebook, he didn't expect to see some drawings of him.
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Tanaka Ryuunosuke
This man is in love with you more than ever, but now that he has seen your drawings, he is already sure that he would spend the rest of the days of his life with you.
I swear, he almost passed out right there.
As soon as you come back from the bathroom, get ready, because he will praise you until the end of the day (but it's not like he doesn't do this every day, but on this particular occasion his compliments would increase by 100%)
At that moment his eyes almost turned into hearts.
Whenever you would do some of his art, he would offer to be your model; doing poses, gestures, expressions, everything you can imagine.
Chikara Ennoshita
He honestly never thought you would draw him. Among so many things you could observe and put in your notebook, why him?
But other than that, he was quite happy, his cheeks turning pink and an affectionate smile appearing on his face as he watched your artwork that you made with so much affection.
When you got to the room, he would tease you in an affectionate way.
He would try to help you with his opinions when you were in doubt about something.
Draw on paper or digitally? What colors to use? He would try to help you choose these and many other questions.
Sugawara Koushi
He would be so proud of you, I swear.
That definitely made Suga happier than he already was (he always say to you that just being in your company is enough to make him happy).
He would give you lots of kisses all over your face as a thank you!!
There would be times when he would see you drawing, and Suga would sit next to you with a sheet of paper and a pencil and try to draw with you. Even if his aren't as pretty or detailed as yours, you'll have fun together.
He would definitely paste the art you gave him on his bedroom wall. And he would always look at them when he was feeling down as a way to cheer him up a little (and it almost always works).
Asahi Azumane
Someone call an ambulance please, he just had a heart attack...
I'm serious, he was so nervous at that point that at any moment he could let out a not-at-all-manly scream.
Asahi would definitely keep your drawings for life, and always checking them out from time to time.
And if you asked him to draw him someday, he would say yes but he would definitely be a blushing mess.
And I don't know why, but in my mind Asahi is a pretty great artist. He would also draw you, but he would never have the courage to show you because he thinks you won't like them or because they aren't good enough.
Please give him some kisses and praise his drawings, he will be extremely shy about it but his heart will warm with so much love!!!
Sawamura Daichi
He would find the drawings very cute!! If you saw his expression when he was looking at the drawings of himself, you would see a big smile on his face.
Daichi would give you the most comfortable hug you had ever received in your life, and kiss the top of your head affectionately.
He already knew that you drew, and even saw you doing some of them, but he didn't imagine that you would draw him too.
I imagine he would ask you and Yachi to make posters for the volleyball club, with you doing the arts and her doing the designs!
And one of the reasons he did this was not because he wanted to show everyone how well his partner draws, no way... (yes, he did!)
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A/N — I barely started writing here and I already disappeared, I'm really sorry guys!!! This week has been really busy for me, so it was a little difficult to finish this one...😭😭😭
And also... THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE SUPPORT!!! I never imagined that in such a short time so many people would read what I'm posting, I'm really very happy!!
— Read part 1 [here] !
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cussima · 19 days
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i shifted accidentally for the first time last night 😭
it wasn't my first time shifting, but it was my first time shifting on accident to a reality completely unknown to me 😭 Anyway here's that (long, quite detailed) story time !! (with reaction pics of course 😋)
i was so tired last night, and i had to wake up at 7AM today, i wanted my mind to be quiet so i could fall asleep easily and not have any vivid/random dreams (they make it so i can't rest well)
my subconscious with a different plan:
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i remember being asleep here, lying on my bed and the darkness of my room, and all of the sudden i was standing in front of a white haired professor in a school in JAPAN !!!
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now I don't have any japanese drs, or am close to anything japanese for that matter (i dont watch anime, etc etc) i think maybe i thought how i'd like to go to a tokyo grand prix for five seconds yesterday but that was it 😭 there was absolutely no reason for me to have woken up in a different country AND AT A SCHOOL !! for that matter like i genuinely have no idea what happened.
ANYWAYS...
the professor just talked about how i was new and my professors, and classmates, and all (i don't remember exactly what he said but when i woke up i knew it was an introductory "welcome to this school talk) and sent me to a classroom where i got way too worked up about a sexist mf, i kinda yelled at him for being sexist and the shit he was saying.
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(i didn't YELL i confronted him and told him his ideology was stupid and might've given him (thrown...ish) some stuff to him but it was on topic i promise it was more like i landed him... some trash... like i put it at his feet for him to pick up okay, let's move on)
then i left that class !! but it was just as other classes were about to begin and another guy that had been in that class with me dragged me into another classroom because he had liked me (he didn't say it but he was rlly nice to me so i assumed he liked me) (liked me as in yk he didn't hate me after the whole class confrontation, i just had so he wasn't as bad as that other mf !!, im not saying he fell in love w me just in case anybody gets confused) (also the classroom wasn't empty he just had another class and dragged me along with him)
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in that classroom he told me to put my hood on (i was wearing a black cotton jacket with a hood on it, we didn't have uniforms) and to not draw too much attention to myself (it was an all boys class, so if the professor found out im a girl she would've kicked me out and tbh idk what i would've done 😔)
and then the teacher came in, (i wanna describe her bc she was sooo,,, teacher core LMAO she had a big nose, glasses, red hair up, burgundy sweater and a white sort of lab coat thingy) introduced the class, and said she was going to play a movie, closed the class curtains and that's when i started remembering i had shifted here.
she played the movie (looking back at it now, i think they might've picked up from where they had left off in a previous class)
it was a movie with rupert grint where he was an adult and he had discovered like a magical realm, i remember i thought of harry potter (bc of rupert) and knowing that had never existed there, he had never been ron. There was also a blonde woman (gorgeous long blonde hair kinda looked like tilda swinton) and a little girl that was somehow related to Rupert's character.
I realized that movie didn't exist in this reality and that's when I sort of began panicking and remembered i had Actually shifted there
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I decided to check my 5 senses but then I realized I don't know the steps to do it....
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like i have to 5 what 4 what 3 what 2 what 1 what
so i just touched the desk where i was sitting, i touched the paper from the boy's notebooks and more stuff i can't remember, i remember wanting to touch the pencils inside the pencilcases but I couldn't be loud + those weren't mine !! and then i breathed in a couple times
and then i opened my eyes here again
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now I know that stuff really doesn't work for me it just brings me back to my dr, because im just trying to remember what the tiktok i saw on this reality about the 5 senses method said 😭
ALSO !!
something i didn't mention is that when I walked into the second classroom, i got nervous when i realized it was an all boys class. I don't know what the class was on, i was looking around frantically, the curtains surprised me they were dark and i had never seen dark gray curtains in a classroom (what a stupid culture shock 😭)
when the teacher came in i put my hair on my eyes to FAKE A FRINGE !!! I didn't listen to her at all when she began the class, and then another guy with big blue eyes was mouthing something to me and the boy behind me, the boy i was with said "he's deaf just read his lips"
MF I DON'T KNOW HOW TO READ LIPS ?!?
so now im nervous as fuck about not being able to read his lips and looking like an asshole that doesn't want to talk to deaf people
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all while trying not to get kicked out of this class !!
it was A Lot of information to take in 😭 no wonder i shifted back i was being silly af
also THEN i shifted to a reality where my phone had barely charged (it had a decent amount of battery after i shifted, it went from 75% at 5AM when i woke up from my shift to 25% at 7AM)
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