#I feel so lonely without anyone to discuss about those things

[grison-in-space]

I am not particularly interested in a “redemption” narrative for incels. That is a question for those individuals to ponder. We do not implore the victims of other forms of terrorism to absolve and educate their tormentors. Nor do we require that other extremists be acknowledged as some kind of wounded, misunderstood victims. It is ironic that so much pressure is brought to bear on women to allow for the humanity and individuality of fallible men when it is precisely this courtesy that incels unfailingly refuse to pay to women.

But I am interested in the men in between. The boys who fall through the cracks. The “good” men who feel scared. The ones who went looking for help, because they felt frightened or sad or lonely, and haven’t been able to disentangle themselves. The ones who just haven’t heard about any of this yet. The ones who look the other way on the bus. Because we can’t change anything without those men. So how do we reach them?

Laura Bates, Men Who Hate Women (2020).

Importantly, she's just spent a lot of time talking about men-led feminist groups that do good work, both in terms of reducing domestic violence and other "traditional" feminist concerns and in terms of providing other narratives, support structures, and information about things that men, like all people, care about: how to keep yourself safe physically and emotionally; how to cope with feeling frightened or uncertain; how to communicate with other people in a world that feels zero sum and frightening.

It's a good, thoughtful discussion of what it means to respond to radicalization in an effective way: you reduce the pain points that funnel people towards radicalized groups, you provide them with positive things to do to help themselves, and you provide empathy to anyone who is willing to provide empathy back to you. But you don't immolate yourself on the altar of healing people who already hate you: you focus on the ones who are easy to help first, the ones who need only a little help, and then you expand.

It's a heavy book, but well worth reading—and not only if you're interested in online misogyny and radicalization. I would recommend the book to anyone with an interest in gender, building a better world, deradicalization, and effectively handling terrorism.

[sighed-the-snake]

At what age does it become intolerable to participate in online fandom?

At what age do you start telling people they're too old to be in a public fandom space because it skews young?

I have been online since the literal beginning of the internet. I've been in chatrooms in one form or another for my entire life, without issue, without anyone telling me I don't belong there. It has been my primary mode of socialization since I was 14. Some of the most important people in my life are people I met online.

But then I turned 40 and suddenly, my presence in a chatroom is creepy.

It wasn't creepy when I was 35 and I was the admin for a huge Discord server full of mostly teens and 20-somethings. Nobody complained when I was 35. They called me their server mom.

But 40 is apparently the limit. I tried to join a few public Discord servers last year and was politely shooed away each time because I was honest about my age.

The obvious solution would be to find spaces with people my own age, right? Except those don't really exist. If it's a fandom space, the overwhelming majority of people are going to be teens, 20-somethings, and a small population of younger 30-somethings. Those are the people who are talking about the things I also would like to talk about.

Even the people I follow here on Tumblr are mostly in their 20s.

There is not much of an online peer group for older Millennials and Gen X. I found and tried some non-fandom, general servers, and they were desolate and stale. A lot of us grew up without computers at home, barely even had computers at school, so the internet never really became a big part of our lives beyond things like Facebook, or Twitter, or discussion boards. Things you spend a few minutes looking over before bed.

But I don't want those things. Tumblr has been great, the Good Omens fandom has been amazing, but I don't want to check throughout the day if someone has replied to something I said hours or days or weeks ago, I want to talk to people, but those places are populated by an age group who tells me it's not appropriate for me to be there anymore.

It's so damn frustrating and lonely. I didn't do anything wrong. I'm not doing anything wrong. I just got older.

I'm just a married gay woman with a kid in school who wants to giggle over an angel and a demon and how in love and stupid they are. I feel like it shouldn't be this hard.

[irkimatsu]

So I've got a request that may be odd but interesting. Reader/Husk where things start off with Husk being an Overlord and Reader a lowly sinner down on their luck, but after a long period of separation (things going sour, Alastor's doing, or whatever sounds best to you) they reunite and rekindle their relationship when Husk has lost everything and is working at the hotel, and Reader has risen the ranks to become an Overlord themselves. GN Reader is fine, thanks for your time!

Oh god help me I made this one angsty. I hope this is along the lines of what you wanted!

3.2k words (help), angst with a happy ending, SFW besides the usual swearing you expect from Hazbin fics. Reader finds Husk again after a decade apart, a tearful reunion is had, oh god help me

---

You stand in the middle of a grand ballroom, with a live band playing acoustic music and food and drink as far as the eye can see. Dozens of demons fill the hall, the most influential Sinners in the Pride Ring joined by their associates and servants.

It’s not the first time you’ve been to one of these gatherings, but it’s your first time here while on the other end of the leash.

You have to admit, it’s somewhat lonely here at the top. You’re not completely alone; like everyone else here, you’ve brought along your favorite contracted soul, who has just brought you a glass of champagne and earned a pat on his head for his troubles. But as you sip your drink, you can’t help but remember something with a smile.

He’d spit this out and ask where the scotch was…

It’s so strange not having his strong arm pinning you to his side. You can still see the charming expression on his face as he speaks with another Overlord, even as his tail waves as a warning to everyone who speaks to him. You know what that tail is saying without him needing to open his mouth.

“I’ll respect you if you respect me, but if you even think about trying anything with my pet, you’re dead.”

A lot of servants here are openly fearful or disdainful of their owners, but Overlord Husk never made you feel anything less than cared for. Sure, he had needs from you, but you enjoyed fulfilling those needs, especially knowing that he’d back down if you asked. He was cocky, spoiled, and reckless, but he adored you and always made sure to show it, both to you and to anyone who dared suspect that you were only a trophy he’d happily gamble away.

Then one day, he was just… gone. You woke up in his bed in the mansion like so many other mornings, and immediately you noticed that you couldn’t feel the faint bindings of his leash around your neck. You searched the mansion for him, but instead, you found Alastor reclining in Husk’s favorite lounge chair, sipping rye from one of Husk’s own glasses.

“Husker is no longer in need of your services, my dear. You’d best be on your way.”

He wouldn’t explain things any further than that, and you never heard from Husk again. What happened to him? Why would he just leave you like that, after years of calling you his most precious treasure…?

You need to shake those thoughts from your head before you have a breakdown in the middle of the party, so you join a nearby group of Overlords you can’t identify by name, intending to nod along and pretend to participate in their conversation. They appear to be discussing that rehabilitation hotel that Lucifer’s daughter started up. You continue sipping your drink and listening, hoping they don’t notice your silence.

“I still think it’s a foolish idea…”

“They did a wonderful job fighting off those exorcists, though. Imagine, we may never have to worry about another extermination thanks to that hotel!”

“Did you see any of the battle?”

“Oh, heavens, no, I never dare leave my shelter during an extermination, and I certainly don’t want to watch such a thing on TV!”

“Well, I caught some of it on the news, and would you believe, I could have sworn I saw the Gambling Demon fighting with the rest of Charlie’s crew!”

You try your damnedest to hide your shock at that news. At the very least, you manage to avoid dropping your glass.

“The Gambling Demon! Staying at Charlie’s hotel?! Surely you’re mistaken! And here I thought Alastor had him killed!”

“Oh, he looks different to be sure. He’s gotten a lot thinner, a lot scruffier. But how many tuxedo cats with giant wings do we have flying around in Hell? It had to have been him!”

“What do you suppose he’s doing in that place? Surely that old drunk doesn’t think Heaven would ever take him?”

“What kind of people does Heaven take, anyway…?”

As the discussion drifts away from the Gambling Demon, your attention drifts away from the discussion.

You’ll need to drop by that hotel sometime soon.

—

It takes you a few days to get away for long enough to stop by the hotel. Who knew Overlord business could be so exhausting? No wonder Husk needed your help with stress relief so often. But finally, after days of wondering, you find yourself standing outside the doors of the recently rebuilt Hazbin Hotel.

Surely it was all rumors, a cruel game of telephone meant to get your hopes up before harshly striking them down. You wouldn’t find him here. Not here, of all places. As far as you know, he’s dead.

But still, you have to know…

With a deep breath, you steel your nerves and push the door open. You’ve barely stepped into the lobby when a cheerful voice starts calling out to you.

“Oh! Hey there!” A group of demons are sitting in a circle of chairs, and all of them are now staring at you. Most of them are strangers, but you do recognize the one who’s enthusiastically waving at you as Princess Charlie herself.

You also recognize the winged cat who is currently staring at you with wide eyes and mouthing something inaudible. He’s much thinner, unhealthily so, and he doesn’t appear to be taking nearly as much care of his fur as he used to… but it can’t be anyone else, can it?

“You’re just in time!” Charlie says as she launches out of her seat and runs up to you. “We were just starting today’s trust exercise! Would you like to join us? It’s a perfect way to see what the Hazbin Hotel is all about!”

She’s speaking so quickly you can barely follow her.

“Oh, right, introductions! My name’s Charlie! What’s your name?”

You tell her your name, and she squeals with glee as she takes your hand. “Come on, come sit with us! Let me introduce you to everyone! This is Angel Dust, and Niffty, and Husk…”

You don’t remember any of the names she says after Husk’s. It really is him. The instant you lock eyes with him, you can’t look away. He’s frozen stiff, only the slight twitches of his tail showing that he hasn’t turned to stone.

“...and we have plenty of open rooms! What size bed do you like? Do you smoke? I know it’s hard to quit, and we’ll help you with that, but before then I can make sure you get a room with a balcony-”

“Charlie!” A girl with long white hair laughs and grabs Charlie’s hand to pull her back down into her seat. “Calm down! I think you’re freaking them out!”

“Sorry, Vaggie, sorry!” Charlie says. “It’s just always so exciting to see a new guest!”

“I don’t think it’s Charlie’s fault,” says the pink spider sitting on Charlie’s other side. “Seems like they just got distracted by our bartender. You like him, don’tcha? I know he’s cute, but don’t try pettin’ him, he bites.”

Husk must be stunned if he’s not reacting to a joke about his cat form. You’ve seen him punch other Overlords for that.

A bartender, though… that part doesn’t surprise you at all. But why here?

“Did you want to get a room set up first?” Charlie asks you. “I can help you pick one out, then we can come do the trust exercise! Oh, I can’t wait to get to know you!”

“I’ll take care of ‘em,” Husk says as he rises to his feet with a grunt.

“Oh, don’t worry about it, Husk! I can-”

“I’m the concierge here, ain’t I? Takin’ people to their room is part of my job.”

“Normally you complain when we ask you to check people in,” Vaggie says.

Husk shrugs at Vaggie’s observation as he heads toward the hotel’s bar. He grabs a box from beneath the bar and shakes it. “So, what size bed? You want a balcony?”

“Um… king?” you say, not sure if it’s an option. “Balcony is fine.”

“Mmm…” he stirs the contents of the box around with his claws for a moment, then takes out a key card and reads it. “Right, here’s one. Fifth floor.” He puts the box back where he found it, then pulls out a book and a pencil. He flips through the book for a specific page, then scribbles something inside it. 

He writes your full name perfectly, despite you not saying it directly to him.

Once that’s taken care of, the book also returns to where it came from. “C’mon.” He heads to the stairwell, and you follow.

What should you say to him? Should you say anything? Should you give him the first word? He doesn’t appear to be taking it as the two of you silently climb the stairs.

You reach the fifth floor, and your hotel room, without either of you saying a thing. “This is it.” He swipes the card and opens the door for you. “Look good?”

It’s a fully decorated room, with potted plants and wall art and a comfortable looking bed. It’s not entirely to your taste, but you can tell whoever designed it took great care with it.

“Don’t mind the art, you can replace that if you want. You might be staying for a while, so make it yours.”

“All right… thank you.”

Over a decade, and that’s all you can say to him?

You expect him to leave you to get settled in, but he keeps standing there, propping the door open. “Hey, uh… do I… know you, from somewhere?”

Your heart gives a single, heavy thud. “I think so… if you’re who I think you are.”

“Can I come in?” he asks. “Talk to you for a minute?”

“What about Charlie?” you ask.

“She’s patient,” is all he says before walking into the room. You follow him in and shut the door behind you. He’s standing in the middle of the room now, not looking at you. He seems to be at a loss of what to do with himself.

“...it’s really you,” he finally says, still facing away. “Before you said your name to Charlie, I thought… it couldn’t be…”

“Husk…” is all you can say. How long has it been since you’ve said that name? It feels so wonderful rolling off your tongue. At the sound of his name, he finally turns around to face you.

“...I missed hearing that…”

Your head is in conflict over what you should do now. Hug him and promise not to lose him again? Slap him and ask where the hell he’s been all this time? Break down crying, overwhelmed with thoughts of how you just spent the last ten years assuming he was dead?

“What happened…?” is all you can manage to say, without moving an inch.

His ears tilt down and he grumbles to himself as he grips his arms. “I didn’t want… didn’t mean… I’m sorry. He wouldn’t… I couldn’t…” he takes a deep breath. “...a lot’s happened since the last time I saw you.”

“Can you tell me about any of it?” you ask.

“Can we sit?” he asks in return. You nod in agreement, and the two of you sit on the edge of the hotel bed.

“How much do you know already?” Husk asks.

“Not much,” you say. “I went to sleep by your side one night, and then I never saw you again. That’s all.”

“Do you remember what I told you that night?” he continues.

“That you had a big meeting the next morning, but that I shouldn’t worry about it and you’d be home soon…” The gears start turning in your head. “What happened at that meeting…?”

“I lost,” Husk says. “I lost everything to Alastor. The money, the casinos, the mansion, the staff… even my own soul. A few bad hands, and that was it.” 

You once again remember seeing Alastor that day, and your hand goes up to your throat. “Did you lose me to…?”

“I didn’t lose you to anyone!” Husk insists. “I promised I’d never bet your soul, didn’t I? I didn’t bet it then, either. He didn’t want me keeping you, said a pet didn’t need a pet of his own… but there was no fucking way I was letting him have you. Letting you go before he took everything from me was the best thing I could do for you.”

“And you couldn’t tell me?” Tears are welling in your eyes. Are you relieved? Angry? Where has he been?

“He wouldn’t let me!” Husk says, defensive. “Wouldn’t even let me near any of the property I used to own! I couldn’t tell anyone from those days what happened! He wanted everyone to think he’d killed me!” He needs a few breaths to calm himself down. You barely recognize your old Overlord in his current face; he looks so lost and tired. “Believe me, I didn’t just give up. I looked for you when I could, but I didn’t know where to begin, especially when I couldn’t even get into my own casinos anymore. If I had any idea where you were, I swear I would have found you…”

If he still doesn’t know where you’ve been, then clearly he forgot to check somewhere vital. “Have you been keeping an eye on the Overlords recently?”

“Like I want anything to do with that fucking group ever again,” he spits out. “I still hate how I lost everything, but I know it’s for the best that I got out of there with some dignity intact… wait.” He sits up and stares at you. “Is that where you’ve been?”

You smile and nod. He chuckles in response and leans back on his hands.

“Heh… should’ve known you’d find another Overlord to take care of you. I just hope they’re good to you… I may not be as powerful as I once was, but I’ll still kill anyone who tries messing with you. I ain’t breaking my promises to you, not even now.”

“Husk…” you say with a shake of your head. “I’m not on anyone’s leash anymore. Not since I lost you.”

“Eh?” He raises a large, red eyebrow. “Then what are you doing, hanging around with Overlords?”

“Well… I am one now,” you said. “After you left, I had to fend for myself. I started a business, made connections with the people you used to know, and now… here I am.”

“No shit… you as an Overlord,” he says. “Not surprised you managed to climb that high, if that’s what you wanted. I just hope you’re playing fair. Not like some of the other scumbags with that title.”

You can’t help but wonder if he’s including himself in “scumbags”.

“Of course I play fair,” you say. “I learned a lot from you. It’s ruthless work, but it doesn’t mean I have to mistreat people for it.”

“Good to hear,” he says. “Good to know some people down here don’t let power completely fuck ‘em up. What kinda souls you own?”

“I try to make fair deals,” you say. “Hiring people to work in factories, using contracts to protect company secrets, that sort of thing. I think my people are happy where they are. I try to make it less awful than it could be, at least.”

“Got any pets?” Husk continues.

“Pets…? Oh.” It takes a moment for you to catch his meaning. “No, no! I’m not interested in that sort of thing. Everyone just works for the company. No personal relationships.”

“Huh… shame. Having a pet is a lot of fun. Getting to spoil ‘em, seeing ‘em smile when you’re around… pissing off other Overlords who don’t understand why their souls hate them so damn much, but your pet can’t keep their paws off of you…” He sighs and closes his eyes. “It was nice, having you by my side. I regret a lot of shit from back then… but I don’t regret having you. …at least, as long as you don’t regret it. Was I good to you back then…?”

“You were amazing,” you assure him as you lean against him. “Amazing enough that… that I can’t see myself with a pet of my own. I don’t belong on that side of the leash… and I don’t belong on anyone else’s leash, either.”

“...you know I’m washed up,” he says. “I ain’t got shit left. No money, no influence, just a damn chain around my neck forcing’ me to do the bidding of a sadistic freak who thinks I’m an animal.”

“Husk…” You can’t help but hug him tight as you hear just what he’s been going through in your time apart.

“I can’t spoil you anymore. I can’t take you to parties, I can’t buy you expensive gifts… that shit’s over now. You’re staring at… well, you’re staring at a withered old husk.”

“Can you still sing to me?” you ask. “And dance with me? Perform tricks for me?”

“I… maybe?” he says. “I’m out of practice. Haven’t had a reason to do any of that for years.”

“But could you?” you repeat.

“I mean… I’d like to… I’ve missed it.” He smiles again, his eyes staring off into the distance. “I still remember how you’d smile when I sang your favorite love songs…”

“I always loved your voice,” you say. “I still remember what you sound like when you sing. I think about it sometimes…”

“Yeah?” he says. “...I think about it too. You smiling as I’d sing to you, and… and hold you…” You’ve been waiting ever since you leaned in, but finally, his arms are wrapped around you. “And tell you that… no matter how much I lost… I’d never lose you…”

You never saw Overlord Husk cry before. Such a prideful man surely couldn’t cry. But as he rests his chin atop your head, you can hear his breathing start to hitch.

“I’m sorry…”

“It wasn’t your fault,” you assure him as you nuzzle his neck, just the way he loved all those years ago. A purr assures you that it hasn’t changed.

“If I knew that day… that when I left, I wouldn’t be coming back… I would have stayed in just a little longer.” He rests his claw on your chin and tilts it up to look in your eyes. Now you can clearly see the tears pricking the corners of his own. “Would have at least kissed you goodbye…”

“You did kiss me goodbye,” you say. “That night, before we went to sleep, the last thing you did was kiss me…”

“...and I promised I’d be back,” he finishes. “I kissed you goodbye for a day. Not a decade.” His claws run down your face, just as gentle as ever. “Could I… do that now?”

“Don’t kiss me goodbye,” you say. “Just kiss me.”

He grants your wish, lightly placing his lips against yours. He finally lets his tears fall, but the way they stain your cheeks doesn’t make you pull away. If anything, they’re just another reminder for you that he’s here, along with his warmth in your arms and the sound of his soft moans vibrating against your lips as he keeps kissing you.

“Charlie…” you murmur. “Charlie’s waiting for us-”

“She’s patient,” he repeats as he pushes you down to the bed. “I’m sure she’ll understand me wanting some quiet time with an old friend.” He offers no further argument before resuming his kisses, and you have no further reason to protest.

“I love you, Husk,” you manage to whisper between kisses.

“I love you too, doll. Always have.”

[vasito-de-leche]

Do you have any specific queer headcannons of r1999 characters if so which ones and why?

I wrote a bunch of stuff for this post but then tumblr fucked me up and reloaded without saving it so here we are..... rewriting it all over again ... OAUGH. usually I default to seeing everyone as Vaguely Bisexual and Not Cis until stated otherwise, but you asked for specifics so here we go!

6 is aromantic or demiromantic.

On one hand, it's because I love projecting on my faves. On the other hand, it's because he genuinely doesn't feel like the type of person to be interested in relationships. But this isn't something that's tied to any potential disgust, repulsion or even trauma related to his Revelation and struggle against fate -- to me, 6 just doesn't feel romantic attraction. At the very least, nothing strong enough to consider pursuing. It's not in his priorities. I really dislike this specific thing that fandoms do in which every single character who is introverted, or who happens to be alone/isolated (either by chance or by choice) is secretly lonely, touch starved, pining and desperate for attention and romantic love. It feels like such a huge disrespect for their equally important platonic or familial relationships. 6 already holds a lot of love for his own community and his childhood friends, a type of affection that is shown in his subtle and unique ways. I like it when his character focuses on those aspects instead!

Mesmer Jr. is aromantic and asexual.

In her case, she's the opposite of 6. Mesmer Jr.'s trauma and OCD is much too intense for her to even consider the idea of an emotional or physical bond with anyone. She's disgusted at the idea of touching others so casually, and she's afraid at the possibility of allowing a person (someone she logically cannot have any control over) into her life because what if they throw her off her schedule? What if they mess every meticulous thing she's planned for herself and her mental stability? What if she loses her grip? Yes, it's plausible that she may find a partner who works perfectly with the way she needs things to be, and yes, you can headcanon that she heals and her OCD becomes "manageable" enough to have a stable relationship, but personally? I just like it when characters don't get to have stereotypical happy endings in which everything gets better through love and friendship and support -- like, yeah everyone loves to see their faves happy and all but eh... It's a bit of projection on my part! Some people don't get to heal and do all the things their disabilities prevented them from doing, even if we're given all this support and love. Some of us just have to find ways around these things, anything that works for us that makes our lives easier.

Sweetheart is queer but has a complex relationship with love. In a somewhat similar vein, Blonney has gone through every single letter of the LGTBQ+ community.

I tried my best to explain my thoughts on Sweetheart but at this point she deserves her own post because it's honestly a LOT, this single part was just too long so I cut it out entirely. Just trust me when I say she's queer and has a very complex relationship with love. In Blonney's case, we discussed the possibility of her being written as comphet and it got me to think a little about her. I see Blonney as the type of girl who presents as a straight bimbo, following the themes of her character and all, but who has constant crisis after crisis in the privacy of her bedroom, the only place she's allowed to be more than just a blondie. This constant journey questioning her orientations and gender happens entirely in her head and in private. I like to think that she just has these long monologues in her head. Sure, she's identified as straight her whole life, but maybe bisexual works better because there was that one girl she kept meeting under the bleachers. Oh, but maybe she's a lesbian, since all her boyfriends are just huge disappointments and none of them ever make her truly happy. Oh, but maybe that's just because she has bad taste in men, there was that one guy in class who keeps making her laugh after all. Ahh, this would be so much easier if she were a guy, her femininity is mostly performative after all. Ah, but she actually really loves pink and fashion... Nonbinary then? No, she's not the type to pick something so vague, it's one or the other. Oh, how about both? Genderfluid! Etc etc. If you ask her about how she identifies, she'll simply brush you off with a "What's it to you? That's none of your business, creep!" and move on, but this is something very personal to her. So far, she knows she likes being femme presenting and that she likes Jessica!

Eagle is a trans girl.

Have you guys seen those posts going around tumblr about how important it is that trans women exist because they fight for their own womanhood and girlhood in a world that constantly looks down upon feminine things and all women as a whole? Yeah. Yeah. Eagle being a scout that fights so hard to prove herself, the feelings of not belonging into the Boy Scouts and seeing how the Girl Scouts are created eventually, a space for her. The fact that she visits her father's grave so that he can see her grow up.

Kaalaa Baunaa, Oliver Fog, Medicine Pocket and Melania are probably bisexual, but they're super busy with work so they don't have time to address that.

Self-explanatory <3 I do like to think that Kaalaa and Medpoc are more chill about it, Kaalaa because she's a grown ass woman who is very mature, and Medpoc because they genuinely give no fucking shits about dating in general, so who cares about confirming whether they're bisexual or not. Oliver Fog is a little more flustered at the idea of exploring his orientation and whatnot, but it's tolerable. BUT MELANIA? I LOVE to think that she's FULLY aware that the MOMENT she acknowledges her bisexuality, she will have a crisis and then what will she do? She has 3 papers due next week and a heist this weekend, she can't possibly sit there wondering about liking girls! She's got things to do!

And here's the extra round of HCs that don't require that much text to explain or that lean towards being more silly!

Eternity has literally outlived the concept of gender. She/They royalty.

37 has QRPs instead. It Just Works. No one but herself and her partners understand the dynamics, though. As god intended <3

APPLe is a raging bisexual and has been spotted in many gay bars. Regulus is also bisexual.

The world would've been a better place if Bette was a butch lesbian.

Balloon Party and An-An Lee play with gender like its playdough.

Baby Blue is Not Cis and she's Not Straight either because none of that shit matters to her anymore, since she's been disconnected from reality and society for so long. She also doesn't care about labelling herself.

Diggers is trans, but no one can figure out which way exactly. It doesn't help that he refuses to clarify either. The same thing happens with John Titor, except she's very vocal about being a transwoman.

Bunny Bunny is bisexual but she hasn't realized this yet. In similar fashion, Horropedia is bisexual but he just forgets about it sometimes.

Druvis III as a trans woman goes hand in hand with Forget Me Not as a gay man. This is why they're both super divorced.

Leilani is pansexual because she prefers the colors of that specific flag over the bisexual one. Spathodea is pansexual because the personal distinction between pansexuality and bisexuality matters to her.

Tennant is bisexual because she can scam and seduce more people that way.

The Fool is nonbinary. Mf should've been born in the 2020's, I just KNOW he would've loved mirrorgender.

Zima is in the closet not out of shame but out of safety. Just in case.

Sotheby assumes that every girl in the world likes girls. So far no one has been able to prove her wrong because all she does is interact with other sapphic girls.

Pavia is nonbinary out of spite. But I also love transguy Pavia HCs so so so much, give that guy boobs, he would never get top surgery <3

Vertin is nonbinary too but she doesn't care about people knowing about it. She does, however, make the effort to be a little androgynous, as a treat for herself.

Madam Z and Katz absolutely had a Situationship going on during university. Katz was bicurious and Madam Z helped her experiment. Now the Situationship is between Madam Z and Constantine, the latter using Madam Z as a rebound after fumbling her relationship with Vertin's mother <- the machinations in my brain will astonish you.

TTT is genderfluid by virtue of being a picture on a TV, so I like to think she can just shift her appearance. In similar fashion, gender means nothing to Alien T and Voyager because they're aliens.

I specifically love the idea of all of the 1.2 gang joking about how Tooth Fairy is their token straight adult figure -- she's actually bi and asexual, but likes to keep that to herself so the kids can make their little jokes and have fun.

Enigma is gay and homophobic because his self-loathing is just that strong.

Turns out that the push Click needed to explore his own sexuality was getting killed on the battlefield, so now he's free to be gay. perhaps bicurious.

[ouchthathurts]

𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐍𝐔𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 (𝐬) ⋮ High-School! Gojo Satoru x Female! Reader

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ⋮ 2.8k (little guy!)

𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ⋮ With the discussion of everyone's phone numbers, Satoru realizes that he has no way of communicating with you outside of school, which he wants to do so very much. Satoru's neediness and pride gets in the way; however, how can he get you to want his number without the meddling Utahime taking great recognition over the fact that she holds knowledge of Satoru’s feelings for you.

𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 ⋮ Kaguya-Sama: Love is War got me wanting to write again! I love this little group dynamic so very much!!!

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬 ⋮ Series | No Spoilers | Second Person POV | Satoru pining over you | Fluff | Humor | Cross-Posted on Ao3 | Not so subtle Utahime x Shoko

“I can’t believe you didn’t respond to what I said, Shoko.” Utahime cried out to Shoko who was sitting next to you, the three of you were having your free time out on a bench, “I didn’t see your text.” The brunette yawned, the cigarette loosely hanging from the corner of her mouth while the girl next you continued to find herself practically sobbing on Shoko.

"Of course, she didn't!" A voice called out from behind the two of you, the three of you turned around to see what loud and obnoxious voice called out to the three of you. You all turned your attention to be met by the one who was held in high regard by those higher yet amongst peers was one who was a disturbance to the peace.

"Shoko never answers my texts either!"  Satoru had cried to you all whilst holding onto Suguru and crying into his shoulder, the three of you rolled your eyes at his behavior before Utahime spoke up, "Like anyone would want to text you!" Shoko and you stifled your laughs before Gojo argued with the girl.

"Oh, Utahime, crying again about things you’re not strong enough to handle?” You watched the dark-haired girl's face scrunch up in anger, Shoko immediately went to massage her shoulders whilst you put your hand up and waved Satoru off. "You're so dead!" Utahime seethed through her teeth fanning the flames of anger that had built up for so long.

Shoko noticed the familiar way the two would fall into, she cooed to the girl next to her. "Don't listen to him. Satoru only texts me and Suguru, and we don't even respond to him that much." Utahime couldn’t help but find herself lulled by the brunette’s voice while the white-haired boy found his heart crushed by such.

Satoru cried out to Shoko, "How could you say that!?" The four of you watched in amusement before Suguru told Satoru off leaving Utahime to agree angrily. "But you guys never text me!" The white-haired boy cried, "Who am I supposed to send all these pictures to and talk about the memories with if none of them will respond!?" You all watched him in confusion, except for Utahime who was watching him with a smirk on her face.

"When Shoko doesn't answer, you know who I depend on?" Utahime chirped, her voice hiding the sinister tones of wanting to show-off to the lonely sorcerer, she hopped over and wrapped her arms loosely around your neck from behind. The way Utahime said your name made you flush, you couldn't help but smile at the attention, "I only answer because I know how lonely you get without Shoko." You waved her off.

This interaction left Satoru in a conflicted state, the brain combated Utahime's as if the two harbored telekinesis, he couldn't think of any reason as to why he would even want to text you in the first place. Satoru huffed at this before waving his hands dismissively, "Who would wanna text them anyways?"

Utahime smirked at this with her eyes slowly closing to hide her glare, "Oh, I know someone who would wanna text 'em." Satoru found Utahime’s eyes on him, watching him like a predator through her closed lids, he cursed himself whilst trying to find the proper footing for the situation. 

All Satoru had in his mind was when the young woman had often caught him staring at you, she followed behind the young man and was the one who found him leave chocolates for you on White Day. Utahime was loud about it, laughing hysterically at such a sentimental Satoru, he knew he couldn’t scare her into not telling you. In result, Satoru accepted this leverage that Shoko held over him.

You took notice of Utahime’s reference to the one who brought you chocolates, "Maybe the person who leaves those things on your desk would really want it." Your ears perked up at this, your eyes wandered away and a look of disdain painted your face, "Oh. I'm not really interested in someone if they can't say it to my face."  You called out. "If they wanted to say something they should say it, I want someone confident enough to tell me they want me. Face to face."

This caused Utahime’s eyes to lazily roll over towards Satoru’s, “Is that so?” The young man wanted to holler into the sky after finally facing the consequences of his actions after teasing the young woman after she was saved by Suguru and Satoru. Satoru needed to tell you to your face, and he did want to do that, someday, it's just that he needed to be sure that he's ready for you. Satoru wanted to break down and cry at the fact that not only had you seen him as a coward for not saying his feelings to you. 

Satoru continued to think for a moment, there was something he needed to say to get your number, in some way he needed to convey that he wanted to talk to you one-on-one without it making it seem like he wanted to talk to you in that way. Satoru was a genius, in his own dazed mind, as he then spoke up about whose numbers he didn’t have. "I only have Suguru's and Shoko's." Shoko lit up her cigarette whilst she spoke, "I have everyone here's phone number." Suguru nodded in agreement. Utahime then spoke up, "I have everyone here besides Gojo's number." You nodded at this, "Me too."

Satoru felt his heart drop. 

Utahime taunted the sorcerer before her, "Wow. Aren't you lonely, Gojo?" Satoru scoffed at this, "Oh please, what am I missing out on?" The young woman felt the shadow cast over her face as she talked, she looked down on Satoru from a throne, "You're really missing out on such sweet messages!" Shoko nodded at this, "They'll text us all good morning and goodnight." Suguru adds on, "They even check in on us after a mission too. Very considerate.

You had everyone's phone number except his? 

What? Even Suguru's? 

You had some other dude's phone number and not his? 

This wasn't fair! Satoru wants a good morning message from you, to text him after missions with such worry and concern so he can put you at ease, and to say a cute good night message to make sure he gets enough sleep. You would send selfies of yourself or even pictures of you and him together. Satoru was on his hands and knees wondering what in the world he should say.

The young man was torn by such, it killed something in him whilst he shriveled up, he spoke up softly, "Well…" The group all turned their attention to him, they stared in confusion at what he was trying to say, only for Satoru to immediately hush up at his question. Once the young man's aquamarine eyes landed on his executioner, he knew he couldn't allow himself to take such a monumental failure.

'Well, can I get your phone number?' 

Such a simple question, right? 

All Satoru wants to do is talk to you outside of Jujutsu High, thus he would have to ask for a hang out just the two of you. Wouldn't that be weird? It’s like I’m asking them out on a date! What am I even talking about? I just ask for their number! Satoru knew what this meant however, if he asked you for your info then that would mean he wants to talk to you outside of school hours, he’d never gone on a mission with you and the two of you never talked that much outside of the occasional greetings and formalities when he caught you talking to Shoko and Utahime.

If Satoru asked you for your number that would be a call out to himself, he'd be outing himself to you and letting you know that he wants you to tell him good morning, good night, to worry over him, to send him pictures of you, to come and schedule dates with you–It practically ate Satoru alive as he tried to think of any way to ask you such a thing.

"Well?" Utahime said softly, the teasing grin on her face as she waited for Satoru's question, the young man quickly gained composure and spoke up. "What do I care about? It's just some messages." Shoko watched as Utahime's brow quivered before she spoke up, "It's not just messages. We finally got to plan a hang out together and we can schedule our time to be around one another." The young woman's eyes turned to stars around the brunette.

You watched on in confusion before speaking up, "Well, yeah, that's communication? What a phone is for?" Suguru nodded at this before he spoke up, "I'm glad for it. It was nice meeting up with you after doing errands for my parents." You couldn't help but smile at the dark-haired man, "Yeah. I was so happy to go get ice cream with you, Suguru." You chirped.

Satoru was quick to question, "You guys hang out?" The whole group was very much confused by his sudden inquiry about the arrangements, "Well, yeah, when I got Suguru's number we found out we both shop at the same places just at different times, so we scheduled a time to go together." You explained, Suguru nodded at this, Satoru felt so frustrated by the two of you. 

All the white-haired boy wanted to do was go back to his dorm, throw himself into his bed, and slam his fists into his bed while he kicked his legs childishly.

Utahime would notice this behavior quickly, his shock that all of them hung out without him was one that was called to attention, the young woman then shot up and slithered around you similar to a snake. "Yeah. Shoko and I always join them shopping." Utahime smiled at this before whipping out her phone to show Satoru the pictures they took, mainly pictures that contained you in different outfits that you tried on and bought, Satoru's heart whined at the fact he could never see you in person with any other clothing than your uniform. 

The only way to get your number without revealing these feelings he so obviously felt is to make it seem like you would need to talk to him. "Well," Satoru started, you all looked over to him, "I should get your guy's numbers since there could be a time where you two need one of the strongest there." Satoru thought for a moment, the idea of you clinging to him to thank him for coming to save you, for you to acknowledge the fact that he came to help you was one that made him smile as he wanted you to think highly of him. 

Utahime and you looked at each other before rolling your eyes at such behavior, "Yeah, I think Suguru can take care of it if need be." You informed the white-haired boy, Utahime giggled at your response and clinged to you, "Exactly, we have another one who is the strongest." The girl continued to rub into your shoulder causing you to giggle. The young man found himself now questioning all angles of what to say before he spoke up again, "Well, in case you guys ever need help if Suguru or Shoko doesn't respond."

You scoffed at this, "I can handle myself. Thank you though." Utahime let out a chuckle, she was holding back the boisterous laughter that almost shot out her throat when you shot down his advance, Satoru was scared as he knew he needed to say something to get your attention.

"Well, you're the same grade as Utahime and even Utahime needed my help!" The young woman almost lost it on the young man before you spoke up, "Utahime is very capable, as am I, just because of one mission slip up doesn't mean we need the 'strongest' there at all times like we're not well versed in what we do." You found yourself a bit peeved by his behavior, it was almost as if he was reaching for something and so, you found yourself continuing to watch the young man in confusion.

Satoru needed to be honest if he wanted to salvage anything, he needed to ask for your number and yet, when he looked into your eyes there was nothing more Satoru could say as he found his heart getting caught in his throat. Shoko and Suguru watched the three of you, not really clicking until the two shared a knowing look after watching Satoru’s needy behavior unfold after you withheld your contact information from him.

Due to time with Satoru, Shoko and Suguru have been able to pick up on his behaviors rapidly thus they already knew what the young sorcerer was getting himself into, the dark-haired man was stifling his laughter as he realized his close friend was trying to get your number without admitting that whilst Shoko had found the situation humorous and was joyed that Utahime was not stressing over Satoru’s words.

That was until Utahime looked down on him, a caring look as she found herself almost merciful as a Goddess whilst she bestowed her blessing onto the white-haired boy, in that blessing that would bring the situation to a simmer there was only one thing she could do.  "Oh, Gojo," Utahime spoke up, a softness in her voice that called for the eyes of those who had never witnessed such an act to Gojo Satoru, "Do you perhaps want to talk to us outside of just school hours?" With Utahime’s graciousness rapidly falling into her grasp to crush Satoru’s spirit and corner him.

You raised a brow at this. Why would Gojo Satoru want to talk to me? The two of you would only acknowledge each other when you both were in the same area with a simple greeting. You thought for a minute, he was taking a lot of interest, but you knew the confident and overly boastful Satoru was one who would most definitely hurry up and ask for someone's number if he wanted it, the young man was a bravado type. You were quick to see through his scheme and thus formed your own to get him to admit he wanted your guy’s number to talk to you and Utahime.

You were now all aware of Satoru’s feelings, except for you as you believed he wanted yours and Utahime’s numbers when he only wanted yours, unbeknownst to the man who was on everyone’s mind since he thought he was so clever at his scheme and hiding his emotions that he was practically smirking at his 'greatness'. Sotaru thought of himself so brilliant when he uttered the following, "What would I ever need your guy's number for? I'm just offering my help is all. As one of the greatest, it is my duty to help and protect those who are weaker than me." 

No one liked that in the slightest. 

Satoru was digging himself a hole, what could any of you possibly do whilst you all tried to think of something to say after such a blunder from the young man, he only stared at you all in confusion since you all went silent trying to make sure the group didn't begin to separate themselves just because of what Satoru had said.

You didn’t get that message though.

"Well, on that note, I'm gonna go." You told them, you found yourself not wanting to beat around the bush and if a man couldn't admit he wanted the numbers, then he wasn't worth the time of getting to know them, "I'll see you all later." You spoke up and waved to the rest of them before heading off. 

The group watched you get a fair distance away before they all turned their attention to Satoru, "That's them, huh?" Shoko teased and Suguru held back his laugh with a large toothy smile, "I never thought you'd be so scared to admit you wanted someone's number." Utahime pointed out as she found herself covering her mouth with Suguru covering up his mouth as well to hide his smirk whilst he spoke up, "So you're the one that gave them chocolates, Satoru?" 

The group was questioning the young man yet, he couldn't even answer them as he found himself so clouded with the fact that you had left after such words, anyone else would've swooned at that line and have acted upon handing the number over. You wanted Satoru to admit he wanted your number; in his mind you wanted him to fork over every possession that meant anything to him and devote himself to you. 

© ouchthathurts please don't translate, claim as yours, redistribute and/or plagiarize in any way.

Satoru wouldn't mind that, even if it does take him awhile to finally profess his feelings.

[weirdkpopgirl]

For Once | Jeno Imagine #11

Title: For Once

Genre: Angst, friends to lovers (kinda)

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, reader being tipsy, insecurities, depressive thoughts (yay)

Word Count: ~1.06k

Author's Note: I actually came up with this story idea awhile ago, two months maybe? And I know I've written a similar story for Jeno before, so I tried to change it up a bit. But for some reason, I just feel like Jeno fits the friends to lovers trope really well. He's the type of person you could trust, and quietly care about you. Anyway, I hope for this story to reach out to those who might be hurting alone. If you are, you don't have to be. I hope there's someone in your life you can lean on. Thank you for reading ^ ^

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The exact time your feet led you away from the party and out to the balcony with a cocktail in hand, you weren’t quite sure. Maybe it was half an hour after you arrived at Chenle's house, maybe even less. You doubt anyone even noticed your absence, as you rarely came to these social gatherings anyway. To your shame, the only reason you accepted your friend’s invitation to his college party was for the alcohol. However, in contrast to the boisterous intoxicated chatter and laughter from inside the house, you opted to indulge in the effects of drinking strictly alone.

With a firm grip on the cocktail glass, you leaned against the balcony railing, allowing yourself to admire the night sky. Cityscapes have become a source of solace over the years, providing enough distraction for your thoughts to get lost in the beauty of the evening. The twinkling lights of neighboring buildings and the ceaseless stream of cars below added to the aesthetic.

Realizing how pathetically lonely you were, a single sigh escaped your lips before you downed the remnants of your drink. Contemplating the bittersweet nature of the moment, you sensed a lingering gaze upon you. Turning around self-consciously, you found Jeno closing the balcony door before joining you, standing silently by your side.

Honestly, Jeno’s presence would have caught you off guard just a month ago. However, new emotions have recently been stirring between the two of you, though neither of you was sure how best to broach the subject without letting things get awkward. Yet, his friendship was something you hadn’t fully realized how much you cherished.

“I had a feeling you’d be out here,” Jeno spoke first. “You okay?”

You hummed in reply, without meeting his eyes just yet. “Yeah. I just needed some fresh air.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Jeno’s gaze linger on you before his arm reached out to offer you a glass of water. “Here, I thought you might need some water.”

The corner of your lips upturned into a small smile of gratitude.  “Thanks,” you replied, setting the cocktail glass on the ground. Taking a long sip of the ice-cold water, you let out another exhale.

Jeno returned the smile, and the conversation flowed comfortably between the two of you from there. Talking to Jeno always felt effortless, as he was the type of person who was always willing to lend a listening ear. He was the first guy you met who was genuinely interested in getting to know you. Somehow the topic of discussion veered to bucket lists, and you found the glimmer of excitement in Jeno’s eyes as he spoke to be a little endearing—maybe more than that.

“Yeah, I’d like to travel to Japan with Jaemin one day,” Jeno expressed. “He’s the type to plan everything out, so I can just sit back and relax.”

You chuckled softly, your gaze drifting back to the night sky. “That sounds nice. I’m sure you guys will have a great time.”

“How about you? Do you have anything on you really want to do?” The male’s head tilted slightly, noticing the distant look in your eyes.

Your brows furrowed in hesitation as you pondered for a moment. Although you hadn’t given much thought about bucket lists before, there was one thing that came to mind.

“This is going to sound silly. But I want…I want to visit a waterfall one day,” you said slowly. “Where I can be alone for an hour or less and cry out loud.”

Immediately following your confession, you cringed at the vulnerability in your voice. But Jeno didn’t appear to perceive you as weak or pitiful. 

“Why would you want to do that?” Jeno asked, his expression flickering with concern.

Avoiding his gaze, you shrugged. “I’m just so sick of pretending to be fine around others all the time, but I don’t like showing my weakness either. So for once, it would be nice to just go somewhere I can let it all out, you know?”

A part of you wished you had another cocktail. You weren’t the type to drink much, especially at parties. But alcohol came in handy when you didn’t want to feel your emotions. Since you were too afraid to face Jeno, you didn’t notice the realization that dawned on him. Then you felt the warmth of his hand enveloping your cold one.

“Will you let me come with you?” He asked in a tender tone, softening the deep timbre of his voice.

Turning to the boy in slight surprise, you passed him a confused look. “You’d do that for me? Why?”

“Because it might feel better to have at least someone there beside you,” he said in a sincere voice. “You don’t have to cry alone, (Y/n).”

Heat rose to your cheeks, not having expected him to make your heart flutter like that. Yet, this was Lee Jeno after all. Since meeting him, he’s inadvertently made you feel a lot of different things for the first time.

Your heart raced as you met his eyes properly this time, overwhelmed by the warmth of his offer. “Thank you, Jeno,” you whispered, smiling softly. “I don’t think I deserve to have a friend like you.

The boy held your gaze for a moment, the air crackling with this unspoken tension that had been lingering between you before this evening. He longed to lean in and kiss you right then and there, to show you just how much you meant to him. However, he restrained himself, sensing that this wasn’t the right time to act on impulses. 

Instead, he changed the grip of his hand to hold yours securely. The skin-to-skin contact sent a tingly sensation between the both of you. It felt nice, and he was relieved when you didn’t withdraw your hand. 

Squeezing just a little tighter, Jeno’s lips parted to say something. “Trust me, you deserve a lot more, (Y/n). So when we go to that waterfall together, don’t hold back, okay?”

Your lips trembled, but you were determined not to cry at this time. Perhaps you were still a bit tipsy from drinking, but this might just be the moment when Jeno captured your heart completely. And maybe you could let go of your insecurities and for once, embrace the fact that you were deeply in love with him.

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previous masterlist -> current masterlist

[lovelessrage]

I have been struck by an urge to discuss Bojack Horseman. While I am not asexual, I am aspec in every other sense outside of it, and Todd Chavez still matters a lot as a character to me. It was the first canon aspec, the first character where it is said, matters to his plot, and impacts his life, that I had ever seen in a show I actually enjoyed.

A lot of aspec representation feels like it isn't made for me; it's made for young/rowdier teens, and while that's a demographic that needs those figures, it leaves me feeling like reading these books and watching these shows just aren't my thing. It isn't my carnival ride; it feels like I'm too old, despite... not being that old. Maybe it's my humour or my preferences, I dunno. Regardless, Todd Chavez feels like, for all his goofy antics and being the character that has the most absurd life out of anyone, an adult facing a real crisis of identity. Not a teenager coming to terms, but an adult man realizing what's expected of him as an adult is immensely limiting and petrifying as a closeted asexual.

The way his first interaction with being aspec is not being comfortable with labelling it yet, setting boundaries about whether he likes jokes, trying to find community but still feeling a bit lonely and out of place. It all feels very natural, real, and lived. And so does his relationship with Yolanda, which was immensely good commentary to me about aspec loneliness.

Especially for those who still like to date, have hookups, QPRs, or any other type of committed dynamic, it often feels like you are compelled to choose the first person who offers it to you, because you have no other choice. This extends to other queer labels as well, such as T4T struggles and the gay and lesbian dating scene, but we're talking aspecs right now and we'll stay on that ball. There is nothing wrong with Yolanda, which I like as well, she's not framed as a bitter person or frigid, they're just not meant for each other. I also like the inclusion of, despite how different they are, Yolanda is still desperate to cling to this because she's afraid she'll never meet another asexual again. It is, again, a real problem; people getting into unhappy relationships because they think it is all they will get.

That's why this show's representation speaks to me so much, even if it's not my label. It feels like an honest confrontation of aspec issues, rather than just making a character aspec as a one-off, or only confronting it for one episode. As well, it doesn't belittle Todd for this aspect or make his problems childish. It's another adult problem alongside all the others the characters are going through, and there are plenty of references to the struggle of acceptance and the struggle of existence without making asexuality at fault for any of it. It is acephobic society, not asexuals, being blamed. They get to be part of the humour rather than at the expense of it.

There gets to be ace joy alongside ace struggle, and neither are treated as more worth focusing on or telling a story about. His later happiness with Maude is celebrated by his family and friends, and his coming out is met with understanding, even if it's not fully informed. He gets to meet other asexuals, and even if it does not solve his problems, it lends a needed helping of reminding the audience there is a community, not just an individual.

Nothing in Bojack Horseman is instantaneous. No change of character is simply a heelturn and a continuation. I am always immensely happy on every rewatch to see how much time was devoted to making Todd's asexuality journey mean something and mean something to his life. To me, this is the textbook example of what it means to write an aspec character with their identity in mind; it's not just a label, it's also how your life is affected, your relationships, and how you see your future.

[tinylittleobsessions]

What if "Hogwarts Legacy" characters took the MBTI test?

Okay, this is something I do in this blog: whenever I obsess with a new story, I try and imagine what personality type would each character get on the MBTI test. It's silly, I know, haha - but I LOVE character study and discussing character personalities in detail; that's why I love writing this kind of post. So OF COURSE I had to do it with Hogwarts Legacy characters!

If you don't know this test, it's a personality test based on a theory written by Carl Gustav Jung that divides people in 16 different types of personalities. The personalities are defined by different combinations of letters that represent specific aspects of our behaviour and way of thinking: "I" for "Introverted", for example, "T" for "Thinking", "J" for "Judging", and so it goes. This way, your result will be something like "ENTJ", or "ISFP". This test is not universally accepted as scientific, true or correct, BUT I think it's a lot of fun. If you don't know your MBTI yet, you can take the test here.

Of course, this is heavily based on headcanon. Especially in the case of this game, I feel there are characters we barely know anything about - all we "know" is actually headcanon. 🤣 But I also think those headcanons are pretty much "accepted" by biggest part of the fandom, so hopefully you'll understand why I classified each one of them the way I did. I tried to focus on the students, but, when I couldn't find any student that would fit an specific personality type, I resorted to the other characters (Hogwarts staff, Hogsmeade, etc).

So, let's try this. Let me know what you think, please! 💚

THE ANALYSTS

OMINIS GAUNT: The Architect (INTJ) - Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Judging

Thoughtful. Their inner world is a private, complex one

Love perfecting the details of life, applying creativity and rationality to everything they do. Their minds are never at rest

Pride themselves on their ability to think for themselves, not to mention their uncanny knack for seeing right through phoniness and hypocrisy

May be cynical about human nature more generally, assuming that most people are lazy, unimaginative, or simply doomed to mediocrity

They question everything and prefer to make their own discoveries. In their quest to find better ways of doing things, they aren’t afraid to break the rules or risk disapproval: in fact, they rather enjoy it (and Heaven help anyone who tries to slow them down by enforcing pointless rules or offering poorly thought-out criticism)

They don't mind acting alone, perhaps because they don't like waiting around for others to catch up with them. They also generally prefer making decisions without asking for anyone else's input. At times, this lone-wolf behavior can come across as insensitive, as it fails to take into consideration other people's thoughts, desires, and plans

Because Architects value truth and depth, many common social practices - from small talk to white lies - may seem pointless or downright stupid to them. It would be a mistake, however, to view Architects as uncaring. These personalities feel deeply: when things go wrong or when they hurt others, Architects are personally affected and spend much time and energy trying to figure out why things happened the way that they did

Architects can be single-minded, with little patience for frivolity, distractions, or idle gossip. That said, they're far from dull or humorless. Many Architects are known for their irreverent wit, and beneath their serious exteriors, they often have a sharp, delightfully sarcastic sense of humor

ELEAZAR FIG: The Logician (INTP) - Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Prospecting

Logicians often lose themselves in thought - which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. People with this personality type hardly ever stop thinking, 'cause they can’t help but puzzle over the mysteries of the universe

Logicians are Introverts and tend to get tired out by extensive socializing. After a long day, they crave time alone to consult their own thoughts. But when they connect with someone who can match their mental energy, these personalities absolutely light up, leaping from one thought to another. Few things energize them like the opportunity to swap ideas or enjoy a lively debate with another curious, inquiring soul.

They love to analyze patterns. Without necessarily knowing how they do it, people with this personality type often have a Sherlock Holmes-like knack for spotting discrepancies and irregularities. When it comes to dissecting a tricky, multilayered problem and coming up with a creative solution, few personality types can match Logicians’ creative genius and potential.

The "analysis paralysis" can affect multiple areas of Logicians' lives. People with this personality type can overthink even the smallest of decisions.

IMELDA REYES: The Commander (ENTJ) - Extraverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Judging

People with this personality type embody the gift of confidence, and project authority in a way that draws crowds together behind a common goal. However, Commanders are also characterized by an often ruthless level of rationality, using their drive, determination and sharp minds to achieve whatever end they've set for themselves.

If there's anything Commanders love, it's a good challenge, big or small, and they firmly believe that given enough time and resources, they can achieve any goal. This quality makes people with the Commander personality type brilliant entrepreneurs, and their ability to think strategically and hold a long-term focus while executing each step of their plans with determination and precision makes them powerful business leaders.

At the negotiating table, Commanders are dominant, relentless, and unforgiving. This isn't because they are coldhearted or vicious per se - it’s more that Commander personalities genuinely enjoy the challenge, the battle of wits, the repartee that comes from this environment, and if the other side can’t keep up, that’s no reason for Commanders to fold on their own core tenet of ultimate victory.

The underlying thought running through the Commander mind might be something like "I don’t care if you call me an insensitive b*tch, as long as I remain an efficient b*tch".

If there’s anyone Commanders respect, it’s someone who is able to stand up to them intellectually, who is able to act with a precision and quality equal to their own. Commander personalities have a particular skill in recognizing the talents of others, and this helps in their team-building efforts

To people with the Commander personality type, emotional displays are displays of weakness, and it’s easy to make enemies with this approach. Especially in a professional environment, Commanders will simply crush the sensitivities of those they view as inefficient, incompetent or lazy

EVERETT CLOPTON*: The Debater (ENTP) - Extraverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Prospecting

Quick-witted and audacious, Debaters aren't afraid to disagree with the status quo. In fact, they're not afraid to disagree with pretty much anything or anyone. Few things light up people with this personality type more than a bit of verbal sparring - and if the conversation veers into controversial terrain, so much the better.

It would be a mistake, though, to think of Debaters as disagreeable or mean-spirited. Instead, people with this personality type are knowledgeable and curious, with a playful sense of humor, and they can be incredibly entertaining. They simply have an offbeat, contrarian idea of fun - one that involves a healthy dose of spirited debate. They are respected for their vision, confidence, knowledge, and keen sense of humor

For this personality type, no belief is too sacred to be questioned, no idea is too fundamental to be scrutinized, and no rule is too important to be broken, or at least thoroughly tested.

As Debaters see it, most people are too ready to do as they’re told and blindly conform to social norms, pressures, and standards. Debaters enjoy the mental exercise of questioning the prevailing mode of thought, and they take a certain pleasure in uncovering the value of underdogs and outliers. Their active minds can’t help but rethink the things that everyone else takes for granted and push them in clever new directions.

*this was a very hard one. I ended up deciding for Everett because his most important interaction with MC in the game is basically telling them to break the rules and try something different, lol (and because I think this personality type is very Ravenclaw-like). But I confess I was VERY tempted to choose Peeves for this one, lol

THE DIPLOMATS

NATSAI ONAI: The Advocate (INFJ) - Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Judging

Idealistic and principled, they aren’t content to coast through life – they want to stand up and make a difference. For Advocate personalities, success doesn’t come from money or status but from seeking fulfillment, helping others, and being a force for good in the world. Their inner vision, personal values, and a quiet, principled version of humanism guide them in all things.

While they have lofty goals and ambitions, Advocates shouldn’t be mistaken for idle dreamers. People with this personality type care about integrity, and they’re rarely satisfied until they’ve done what they know to be right. Conscientious to the core, they move through life with a clear sense of their values, and they aim never to lose sight of what truly matters – not according to other people or society at large, but according to their own wisdom and intuition.

Advocates are troubled by injustice, and they typically care more about altruism than personal gain. They often feel called to use their strengths – including creativity, imagination, and sensitivity – to uplift others and spread compassion. Many Advocates see helping others as their mission in life, and they’re always looking for ways to step in and speak up for what is right. People with this personality type also aspire to fix society’s deeper problems, in the hope that unfairness and hardship can become things of the past.

Advocates may be Introverted, but they value deep, authentic relationships with others. Few things bring these personalities as much joy as truly knowing another person – and being known in return. Advocates enjoy meaningful conversations far more than small talk, and they tend to communicate in a way that is warm and sensitive. This emotional honesty and insight can make a powerful impression on the people around them.

MIRABEL GARLICK: The Mediator (INFP) - Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Prospecting

Mediators have vibrant, passionate inner lives. Creative and imaginative, they happily lose themselves in daydreams, inventing all sorts of stories and conversations in their minds. These personalities are known for their sensitivity - Mediators can have profound emotional responses to music, art, nature, and the people around them.

Mediators share a sincere curiosity about the depths of human nature. Introspective to the core, they’re exquisitely attuned to their own thoughts and feelings, but they yearn to understand the people around them as well. Mediators are compassionate and nonjudgmental, always willing to hear another person’s story. When someone opens up to them or turns to them for comfort, they feel honored to listen and be of help.

Few things make Mediators more uneasy than pretending to be someone they aren’t. With their sensitivity and their commitment to authenticity, people with this personality type tend to crave opportunities for creative self-expression. They can’t help but muse about the meaning and purpose of life, dreaming up all sorts of stories, ideas, and possibilities along the way.

Like flowers in the spring, Mediators’ creativity and idealism can bloom even after the darkest of seasons. Although they know the world will never be perfect, Mediators still care about making it better however they can. This quiet belief in doing the right thing may explain why these personalities so often inspire compassion, kindness, and beauty wherever they go.

SIRONA RYAN*: The Protagonist (ENFJ) - Extraverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Judging

Thoughtful and idealistic, these personality types strive to have a positive impact on other people and the world around them. They rarely shy away from an opportunity to do the right thing, even when doing so is far from easy.

Protagonists are born leaders: their passion and charisma allow them to inspire others not just in their careers but in every arena of their lives, including their relationships. Few things bring Protagonists a deeper sense of joy and fulfillment than guiding friends and loved ones to grow into their best selves.

They tend to be vocal about their values, including authenticity and altruism. When something strikes them as unjust or wrong, they speak up. But they rarely come across as brash or pushy, as their sensitivity and insight guide them to speak in ways that resonate with others.

These personality types have an uncanny ability to pick up on people’s underlying motivations and beliefs. At times, they may not even understand how they come to grasp another person’s mind and heart so quickly. These flashes of insight can make Protagonists incredibly persuasive and inspiring communicators.

Protagonists are genuine, caring people who talk the talk and walk the walk. Nothing makes them happier than motivating other people to do what’s right.

*I know it’s a bit ironic that Sirona gets “The Protagonist” when she’s a tertiary character, hahaha. But I really see her as a very important member in the Hogsmeade community; seen as a leader figure by some. We have a lot of “if Sirona trusts them, I trust them too” moments in the game. So, that’s why.

POPPY SWEETING: The Campaigner (ENFP) - Extraverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Prospecting

Campaigners are true free spirits – outgoing, openhearted, and open-minded. With their lively, upbeat approach to life, they stand out in any crowd. But even though they can be the life of the party, Campaigners don’t just care about having a good time. These personality types run deep - as does their longing for meaningful, emotional connections with other people.

Friendly and outgoing, Campaigners are devoted to enriching their relationships and their social lives. But beneath their sociable, easygoing exteriors, they have rich, vibrant inner lives as well. Without a healthy dose of imagination, creativity, and curiosity, a Campaigner simply wouldn’t be a Campaigner. These personalities believe that everything and everyone is connected, and they live for the glimmers of insight that they can gain into these connections.

They are independent and creative, always on the lookout for the magic and meaning in everyday life. Campaigner personalities are capable of intense thought and feeling - and also of kicking back and having a good time.

Even in moments of fun, Campaigners want to connect emotionally with others. Few things matter more to these personality types than having genuine, heartfelt conversations with the people they cherish. Campaigners believe that everyone deserves to express their feelings, and their empathy and warmth create spaces where even the most timid spirits can feel comfortable opening up.

THE SENTINELS

DADDY AESOP SHARP*: The Logistician (ISTJ) - Introverted, Observant, Thinking, and Judging

These people tend to be reserved yet willful, with a rational outlook on life. They pride themselves on their integrity, compose their actions carefully and carry them out with methodical purpose. People with this personality type mean what they say, and when they commit to doing something, they make sure to follow through.

People with this personality type believe that there is a right way to proceed in any situation – and that anyone who pretends otherwise is probably trying to bend the rules to suit their own purposes. Logisticians have a deep respect for structure and tradition, and they are often drawn to organizations, workplaces, and educational settings that offer clear hierarchies and expectations.

People with the Logistician personality type rarely hesitate to take responsibility for their actions and choices. Generally speaking, they are quick to own up to their own mistakes, admitting the truth even if it doesn’t make them look good. To Logisticians, honesty is far more important than showmanship, and they’d rather satisfy their own conscience than lie to impress someone else.

At times, Logisticians might unfairly misjudge people who can’t match their rigorous self-control. Even if Logisticians don’t speak these judgments aloud, their disdain can come through regardless, earning them a reputation for being somewhat strict or unempathetic.

*the description of this personality type seems very fitting for an ex-auror to me haha

ANNE SALLOW: The Defender (ISFJ) - Introverted, Observant, Feeling, and Judging

In their unassuming, understated way, Defenders help make the world go round. Hardworking and devoted, people with this personality type feel a deep sense of responsibility to those around them. Defenders can be counted on to meet deadlines, remember birthdays and special occasions, and shower their loved ones with gestures of care and support. But they rarely demand recognition for all that they do, preferring instead to operate behind the scenes.

Though sensitive and caring, Defenders also have excellent analytical abilities and an eye for detail. And despite their reserve, they tend to have well-developed people skills and robust social relationships. They are true altruists, meeting kindness with kindness and engaging with the work and people they believe in with enthusiasm and generosity.

Among Defenders’ most distinctive traits is loyalty. Rare is the Defender who allows a friendship or relationship to fade away from lack of effort. People with this personality type are known for dropping everything and lending a hand whenever a friend or family member is going through a hard time. Defenders’ sense of loyalty doesn’t stop with their nearest and dearest - it often extends to their communities, their employers, and even family traditions.

For Defenders, “good enough” is rarely good enough. People with this personality type can be meticulous to the point of perfectionism. They take their responsibilities personally, consistently going above and beyond and doing everything that they can to exceed others’ expectations. Even then, they are known for their humility, and they rarely seek the spotlight.

Defenders have a deeply social nature. Thanks to their ability to remember the details of other people’s lives, Defenders have a special talent for making their friends and acquaintances feel seen, known, and cherished.

DINAH HECAT: The Executive (ESTJ) - Extraverted, Observant, Thinking, and Judging

Executives are representatives of tradition and order, utilizing their understanding of what is right, wrong and socially acceptable to bring families and communities together. Embracing the values of honesty, dedication and dignity, people with the Executive personality type are valued for their clear advice and guidance, and they happily lead the way on difficult paths.

Strong believers in the rule of law and authority that must be earned, Executive personalities lead by example, demonstrating dedication and purposeful honesty, and an utter rejection of laziness and cheating, especially in work.

Executives are aware of their surroundings and live in a world of clear, verifiable facts - the surety of their knowledge means that even against heavy resistance, they stick to their principles and push an unclouded vision of what is and is not acceptable. Their opinions aren’t just empty talk either, as Executives are more than willing to dive into the most challenging projects, improving action plans and sorting details along the way, making even the most complicated tasks seem easy and approachable.

MATILDA WEASLEY: The Consul (ESFJ) - Extraverted, Observant, Feeling, and Judging

They are attentive and people-focused, and they enjoy taking part in their social community. Their achievements are guided by decisive values, and they willingly offer guidance to others. People with this personality type form the bedrock of many communities, opening their homes – and their hearts – to friends, loved ones, and neighbors.

Consuls do believe in the power of hospitality and good manners, and they tend to feel a sense of duty to those around them. Generous and reliable, people with this personality type often take it upon themselves to hold their families and their communities together. They have a talent for making the people in their lives feel supported, cared for, and secure.

Consuls are altruists. They take seriously their responsibilities to give back, serve others, and do the right thing. And Consuls believe that there is a clear right thing to do in nearly every situation. While some personality types adopt a more lenient, live-and-let-live attitude, Consuls may find it difficult not to judge when someone takes a path that strikes them as misguided. They have a clear moral compass.

Consuls rarely miss a birthday or holiday. Devoted to their relationships, they commit even the smallest details of their friends’ and loved ones’ lives to memory. Loyal to the core, they build lasting relationships, and they can be counted on to show up whenever a helping hand - or a listening ear - is needed. They put a great deal of energy into making other people feel special and celebrated, and they may take it personally when someone doesn’t seem to appreciate their efforts.

For many people with the Consul personality type, one of life’s greatest challenges is accepting that they can’t control anyone else’s thoughts or behavior - not even those who are nearest and dearest to them.

THE EXPLORERS

AMIT THAKKAR: The Virtuoso (ISTP) - Introverted, Observant, Thinking, and Prospecting

They tend to have an individualistic mindset, pursuing goals without needing much external connection. They engage in life with inquisitiveness and personal skill, varying their approach as needed. They love to explore with their hands and their eyes, touching and examining the world around them with cool rationalism and spirited curiosity.

Virtuosos explore ideas through creating, troubleshooting, trial and error and first-hand experience. They enjoy having other people take an interest in their projects and sometimes don’t even mind them getting into their space. They enjoy lending a hand and sharing their experience, especially with the people they care about.

Virtuosos are actually quite enigmatic. Friendly but very private, calm but suddenly spontaneous, extremely curious but unable to stay focused, Virtuoso personalities can be a challenge to predict, even by their friends and loved ones.

The biggest issue Virtuosos are likely to face is that they often act too soon, taking for granted their permissive nature and assuming that others are the same. They’ll be the first to tell an insensitive joke, get overly involved in someone else’s project, roughhouse and play around, or suddenly change their plans because something more interesting came up.

ABRAHAM RONEN: The Adventurer (ISFP) - Introverted, Observant, Feeling, and Prospecting

Adventurers are true artists – although not necessarily in the conventional sense. For this personality type, life itself is a canvas for self-expression. From what they wear to how they spend their free time, Adventurers act in ways that vividly reflect who they are as unique individuals.

Driven by curiosity and eager to try new things, people with this personality often have a fascinating array of passions and interests. With their exploratory spirits and their ability to find joy in everyday life, Adventurers can be among the most interesting people you’ll ever meet. The irony? Unassuming and humble, Adventurers tend to see themselves as “just doing their own thing,” so they may not even realize how remarkable they really are.

Adventurers embrace a flexible, adaptable approach to life. Some personality types thrive on strict schedules and routines, but not Adventurers. They take each day as it comes, doing what feels right to them in the moment. And they make sure to leave plenty of room in their lives for the unexpected - with the result that many of their most cherished memories are of spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment outings and adventures, whether by themselves or with their loved ones.

This flexible mindset makes Adventurers remarkably tolerant and open-minded. These personalities genuinely love living in a world filled with all kinds of people - even people who disagree with them or choose radically different lifestyles. It’s no surprise, then, that Adventurers are unusually open to changing their minds and rethinking their opinions. If any personality type believes in giving something (or someone) a second chance, it’s Adventurers.

In their relationships, Adventurers are warm, friendly, and caring, taking wholehearted enjoyment in the company of their nearest and dearest. But make no mistake: this is an Introverted personality type, meaning that Adventurers need dedicated alone time to recharge their energy after socializing with others. This alone time is what allows Adventurers to reestablish a sense of their own identity - in other words, to reconnect with who they truly are.

SEBASTIAN SALLOW: The Entrepreneur (ESTP) - Extraverted, Observant, Thinking, and Prospecting

Entrepreneurs always have an impact on their immediate surroundings. Laughing and entertaining with a blunt humor, Entrepreneur personalities love to be the center of attention. They keep their conversations energetic, with a good dose of intelligence.

Entrepreneurs are the likeliest personality type to make a lifestyle of risky behavior. They live in the moment and dive into the action - they are the eye of the storm. Entrepreneurs leap before they look, fixing their mistakes as they go, rather than sitting idle, preparing contingencies and escape clauses. They are good making critical decisions based on factual, immediate reality in a process of rapid-fire rational stimulus response.

To Entrepreneurs, it makes more sense to use their own moral compass than someone else’s: rules were made to be broken. This is a sentiment few high school instructors or corporate supervisors are likely to share, and can earn Entrepreneur personalities a certain reputation. But if they minimize the trouble-making, harness their energy, and focus through the boring stuff, Entrepreneurs are a force to be reckoned with.

With perhaps the most perceptive, unfiltered view of any type, Entrepreneurs have a unique skill in noticing small changes. Whether a shift in facial expression, a new clothing style, or a broken habit, people with this personality type pick up on hidden thoughts and motives where most types would be lucky to pick up anything specific at all. They use these observations immediately, calling out the change and asking questions, often with little regard for sensitivity

They are full of passion and energy, complemented by a rational mind. Inspiring and convincing, they are natural group leaders, pulling everyone along the path less traveled, bringing excitement everywhere they go. But they enjoy the drama, the passion, the pleasure: if they aren’t careful, they may get too caught in the moment, take things too far, and run roughshod over more sensitive people - or forget to take care of their own health and safety.

GARRETH WEASLEY: The Entertainer (ESFP) - Extraverted, Observant, Feeling, and Prospecting

These people love vibrant experiences, engaging in life eagerly and taking pleasure in discovering the unknown. They can be very social, often encouraging others into shared activities. Entertainers get caught up in the excitement of the moment, and want everyone else to feel that way, too. No other personality type is as generous with their time and energy as Entertainers when it comes to encouraging others, and no other personality type does it with such irresistible style.

Utterly social, Entertainers enjoy the simplest things, and there’s no greater joy for them than just having fun with a good group of friends. They love the spotlight, and all the world’s a stage.

Though it may not always seem like it, Entertainers know that it’s not all about them - they are observant, and very sensitive to others’ emotions. People with this personality type are often the first to help someone talk out a challenging problem, happily providing emotional support and practical advice. However, if the problem is about them, Entertainers are more likely to avoid a conflict altogether than to address it head-on. They usually love a little drama and passion, but not so much when they are the focus of the criticisms it can bring.

Entertainers recognize value and quality, which on its own is a fine trait. They also have the strongest aesthetic sense of any personality type: knowing what’s attractive the moment they see it, Entertainers aren’t afraid to change their surroundings to reflect their personal style. Entertainers are naturally curious, exploring new designs and styles with ease.

They are welcome wherever there’s a need for laughter, playfulness, and a volunteer to try something new and fun - and there’s no greater joy for Entertainer personalities than to bring everyone else along for the ride. Entertainers can chat for hours, sometimes about anything but the topic they meant to talk about, and share their loved ones’ emotions through good times and bad.

[askmerriauthor]

Pokemon S/V - Story Themes: Failure and Abuse

Something I actually really like about Pokemon S/V, which is somewhat ironic given the state of the game itself, is that its underlying story theme is about how the adults of the setting have utterly failed the younger generation.

General discussion and rambling about Pokemon S/V after the jump, as there's sure to be spoilers. This is a long one, so buckle up.

Throughout the many stories Pokemon has told over the years and its iterations, the role of adults in the series and how they relate to the kids - ostensibly, the Player themselves as well - has varied wildly. They've been mentors, friends, allies, enemies, or even just odd folk we encounter. But, for better or worse, they've always been fairly direct in a What You See Is What You Get sort of way.

Pokemon S/V subverts that a bit in that all of the adults - even those we don't meet and only hear about through dialogue - have completely failed the children of the story. The results of those shortcomings range from very mild to absolutely disastrous, but nobody is untouched by it. Even the Player isn't spared.

Right up front we've got the Friendship Trio: Nemona, Arven, and Penny. Being the core to the story, they're the biggest examples one has out the gate. Common themes they all share are that they're each left without support from their families or peers, and that they're each desperately lonely as a result. Nemona is a star pupil, a battling prodigy, and daughter to a wealthy, powerful family. But despite all her talents she's left adrift without aim or goal. Her younger sister is the one being given control of the family business and Nemona's own talents set her apart from other students, meaning she struggles to find peers. Her family seem all too happy to focus on the younger sister, while Geeta from the Pokemon League and the academy itself happily makes use of Nemona's skills for their own ends. Nemona is constantly eager to please, always looking up to powerful people like Geeta and Professor Turo/Sada, but admits that she's just sort of floundering without any anchor. The people she looks up to only see her as a tool to be used and immediately discarded until the next time they need her.

A lot of Players joke about how battle obsessed Nemona is toward the Player, or how yandere jealous/possessive she becomes immediately upon meeting us. She even stands up to Geeta - who she absolutely hero worships - about our attention being poached. But can you really blame her for realizing there's finally someone who not only matches her skill, but seems dedicated to following a route the game itself states virtually nobody else in the region ever comes close to achieving? Nemona is not only the youngest Champion ever, but the only Champion in years, until the Player shows up. Regardless of what the person holding the console feels toward the Gym Challenge, in-context of the story the Player is proving through their own actions that they value Nemona as a friend/rival and are putting in genuine effort to meet her. When you defeat her, especially at the very end when she goes all out in a way she's never been able to with anyone else, she's thrilled. To Nemona, it's got to be the most amazing validation she's ever had in her life. Why wouldn't she hold on dearly and enthusiastically when nobody else, let alone her own family, are able to keep up with her or offer her the validation she needs?

Arven is just absolutely wrecked by his parental failure. His parent (Turo or Sada depending on which version you're playing) was so obsessed with their research in Area Zero that they threw away their entire family. Their spouse left them and took Arven, leaving the boy growing up constantly feeling the void of that missing part of their life. They keep hearing about the things their Professor Parent has accomplished and how well-regarded they are, but that's always just a reminder that the parent put more effort into their work than into being with their child. When Arven tries to go into Area Zero to find their parent himself, his Mabosstiff (his beloved Pokemon companion he's had literally his entire life) is near mortally injured as a result and Arven spends the rest of the game desperately trying to save it. Later, it's revealed that the Professor's work is endangering literally the entire ecosystem and stands to destroy Paldea itself, leaving Arven with the knowledge that not only was he abandoned for the sake of research, but that research was both ultimately harmful and pointless.

By the time the Player reaches the depths of Area Zero and meets the AI Professor, they find out a few things about the Professor. Namely that they're dead. It turns out that the Box Legendary they brought through time killed them years prior and the person the Player - and Arven - has been interacting with all throughout the game is just an AI replica left behind. While exploring the Professor's various labs, the Player first finds an empty picture frame that had its photo removed and, when in the final lab in the heart of Area Zero, they find the photo pinned to the Professor's work board. A photo of Arven as a tot with his beloved Pokemon (still an unevolved Maschiff at the time). This yields two big realizations. One is that the Professor still absolutely harbored love for their child and family, but allowed their drive - or possibly insanity - to overcome them. They were lying to themselves all those years saying "I'm doing this for my family" while outright ignoring said family entirely. Second is that the Player is the only one who learns outright that the Professor was killed, which means they - albeit off-screen - were the ones to break the news to Arven. Even in death, with the AI Professor's remnants of its creator's memories showing love for Arven, they failed him again and again. It's always up to Arven himself to carve his own way through his parent's wake, relying on his own abilities and the help of his friends, to struggle through the mess his parent left him.

Penny is failed on multiple fronts and to multiple degrees. She's a complete introvert and clearly suffers from a fair level of social anxiety due to the bullying she endured during her time at school. She's not shy, per say; when it comes to interacting with the Player and others, she's actually rather outspoken once she feels comfortable. But there's absolutely a wall put up that she doesn't let anyone past until she's ready, controlling her level of exposure and interaction through mediums like only communicating via phone or intentionally restricting her in-person time behind excuses.

At the most basic level, Penny is failed by her own father who doesn't understand her. She mentions that he's always doting, giving her childish nicknames and basically fawning over her. That sounds great on its face - exactly the sort of thing Nemona and Arven crave - but it shows that her father doesn't understand his daughter. Penny doesn't enjoy or respond well to that type of affection and it's being forced on her, causing a wedge in her home life. Next up are Penny's friends, the bosses of Team Star. They gained that rank and gang affiliation because of Penny; she's the one who set it up as a means of rallying all the students who suffered from constant bullying to stand up for themselves as a unified resistance. By that point she was so emotionally battered that she couldn't even stand to be in the company of other people directly, isolating herself and communicating only through phone calls. The Team Star Bosses and Penny all considered each other to be the closest of friends, yet they had never once met her face to face. While it's not explored as much (criminally so, I say) each of the Team Star Bosses show that they're in a similar state as Penny; they rely on each other for support but also self-expression and validation. It's shown throughout their stories that they're let down by the systems they trusted and their families, not able to find what they need from those establishments and instead turning toward one another.

As it's revealed through the events of the Team Star story, the previous administration of the Paldean Academy allowed a brutal level of bullying to go on at school. So much so that it resulted in the targeted students dropping out, falling to truancy, and literally forming a gang just to protect themselves from their aggressors. When Team Star finally did put their collective foot down (peacefully by both intent and action), they were wrongfully branded as the villains of the story and stigmatized. Team Star was shown that not only would adults not protect them, but would actively punish them for protecting themselves. The school admin at the time - who were fully aware of the whole situation - not only allowed it to happen but then actively attempted to cover it up for the sake of protecting their own asses. They were content to sit by and allow their own students to suffer, ultimately leading to drop outs and expulsions, just for their own sake. This led to both the admin and the entire teaching staff to resign and be replaced by the staff we see in the game, and Director Clavell starts to fall into the same error as his predecessor.

When the Player gets involved, Clavell is about to expel all the Team Star members for good (and there's a TON of them). But, hey, credit where it's due; Clavell really puts in the work and goes to considerable lengths to uncover the truth of what happened. He puts into motion the start of healing those wounds by setting aside not only his time, but his own ego for the sake of understanding his students, protecting them, and rectifying the mistakes of those who came before him. There's a part at the very end where Clavell outright apologizes to Team Star for the abuses they suffered at the hands of the previous Academy staff and deeply bows to them. That may not seem like much on its face, but one has to consider the context of this being a Japanese game. A major authority figure like Clavell bowing and apologizing to those younger than himself, let alone those he's an authority over, is a MAJOR demonstration of genuine regret.

That's not to say Clavell is perfect though. Far from it; while he succeeds in this area, he fails in others as he readily allows Geeta to use both the Academy and its students as she pleases. Geeta outright takes advantage of the students for unpaid labor - the Player included - even though none of them actually work for her. The teaching staff themselves, while all good people who are trying their best, show similar failures to varying degrees. Saguaro doesn't show who he really is because he's afraid of disrupting the image students have of him. Miriam - beloved by students for her skills and nature - languishes unable to fulfill her desire to be a teacher because the credential testing (presumably set by Geeta, who establishes similar needlessly exclusionary tests) keeps knocking her down. Hassel is endlessly harangued by his family to give up his passion for art and teaching to take the lead of their House.

It continues with the Gym Leaders and Elite Four as well, given how Geeta readily abuses her position of power to her own ends. All the Gym Leaders readily discuss their dislike of Geeta, how she holds them back or interferes with them, and the various shortcomings of their lives due to structural failures in their society. People like Larry, Brassius, Grusha, and Iono are wholly at the whims of capitalism in a region where the economy itself is tied directly to the Pokemon League they work for. Larry and Hassel pull double duty as both a Gym Leader and Academy Teacher, as well as members of the Elite Four, further showing how much Geeta is intentionally intertwining all these systems together into a narrow, unstable medium. Poppy, a LITERAL TODDLER, is somehow a member of the Elite Four - when Geeta doesn't even pay adults a living wage to be Gym Leaders/Elite Four and also readily takes advantage of students for free labor, you cannot possibly tell me Poppy isn't an overt case of child labor abuses. Seriously, who are this kid's parents and where the hell are they? Later in the game, Geeta calls the Player on their phone out of the blue and one of the responses you can give is "How did you get my number?". She replies that because you're a Champion, she has access to your personal information. Information you did not consent to give her, that she used her position to look up and privately contact you - a child - for work, without the consent or awareness of your parent. Geeta has set the Pokemon League in a way that best suits her desires and warped the entirety of Paldea around it, endangering and weakening other institutions as a result.

There's actually a lot more to this scattered throughout the game, such as a student who's languished in the Academy system for twenty years without graduating because he's constantly failing. Or everything that has to do with History Teacher Raifort. But this has already gone on long enough of a ramble. In summary, Pokemon S/V has some honestly interesting explorations of institutional and personal failure from the past and how it impacts the future. Themes of generational trauma wasn't what I expected out of a Pokemon game. I hope to see it expanded on in the coming DLC content or, even better, in the upcoming anime series.

[growup-thatbeautiful]

timezone

Summary: Tangerine comes home. Post-Bullet proof.

A/n: i’d love to know if anyone would be interested in a prequel series about this pairing? lmk!

Word count: 2.6k

Bullet Proof Masterlist

~*~

The low hum of music playing through the small record player in the corner of the living room fills the air while you wash up the takeout containers from your dinner tonight. Jovie is fast asleep in her bedroom down the hall, curled tightly underneath her sheets.

Bedtime lasted longer tonight than usual because Tan has been on a job for the past few days. Ever since you moved back in with him, you’ve gotten used to living with him, and so has Jovie, which makes it harder when he isn’t here. You have a routine now to put Jovie to bed, an elaborate and complicated thing with many steps including kids' books and Tangerine’s own story times. So, without him, it’s been hard to convince Jovie to fall asleep these past few nights.

It took you four Dr. Seuss books and one game of hide and seek to get her into bed, which took more energy out of you than you care to admit.

Billy Joel’s crooning voice is interrupted by the ringing of your phone. Carefully, after you dry your hands, you swipe up on the screen of the photo of Tangerine and Jovie that fills it.

On the speaker, his voice fills the empty space between the two of you. You don’t know where he is at this point or if he’s finished what he needs to do- it’s too risky to discuss over the phone- but based on the sounds you think he’s driving somewhere. You can picture the way his ringed fingers grip the steering wheel, his eyes focusing on the road in front of him as neon lights pass by, reflected against the shine of the pendant around his neck.

“Hey, love,” he says, his voice sounding tired but nevertheless affectionate. “How are my girls doing?”

Your heart fills with warmth at his word choice, and you jump up on the counter to sit and talk for a while. “We’re good. I finally got Jovie to bed, though it took more convincing than usual.” Your head hits the wooden cabinet as you lean back and your eyes slide shut.

He hums in response and adds, “I swear to God, she gets her fucking energy from you. You used to be just like her “

“Because I couldn’t fucking trust you then,” you blame. “Had to sleep with my back to the door.”

“I have you no reason not to fucking trust me.” Tangerine’s voice is light, fond remembrance laced through his tone. “Even gave you the bed because I’m a gentleman.”

“You’re no such thing,” you laugh. “And I remember a conversation like this years ago where we couldn’t agree.”

Tangerine fully laughs this time, a low, happy-sounding laugh that you’ve been missing. You learned what it was like without Tan for all those years, so now every time he’s gone you feel it deeper, like something lodged inside your heart. Tan’s laughter dies down and he says. “Yeah, but we’ve fucking changed since then. You’ve come to see how much of a right pleasure I am.”

It’s your turn to hum in agreement. Silence falls between the two of you, but it’s not uncomfortable. You don’t know someone as well as Tan and have uncomfortable silences. You’ve been through so much- making it through silence isn’t the worst thing you’ve faced.

You break the silence, though, because you have to tell him how hard it’s been without him here. Even washing dishes had felt lonely without him bothering you, his front plastered against your back as he places kisses along your neck. “I’ve missed you.”

“The only thing between us is distance,” Tangerine says automatically. “And that’s fucking nothing at all, love.”

“I know.” You hate how weak your voice sounds. How emotion creeps through the cracks and seeps through the phone speaker. “It doesn’t feel like that, though.”

“That bad?” he asks. The concern in his voice carries through despite the bad quality. You don’t know if he’s alone or where he is, but it makes you feel safe somehow, knowing that he’s worried about you. As if he doesn’t already have enough to worry about.

“Not great,” you admit. “Jovie misses you too. She keeps asking me when you’ll be home, but she’s been busy with school.”

“I’m sorry, love.” It fills you with ache, how tired he sounds. You know that he trusts you- you’re not going to leave again- but that doesn’t make things like this any easier.

“It’s okay,” you assure him, or, at least, try to. “You’ll be back soon. How’s everything looking there?”

Tangerine sighs fully and tells through veiled metaphors how it’s been harder than he and Lemon thought to track down the mark they’re looking for, but he thinks that they’ve got a good lead. He tells you how the mark is usually unguarded and without weapons, so it will be easy once they actually find him. You can only hope for his safety.

But safety, in your lives, is a laughable commodity that you haven’t known for years. It’s your choice and you’ve had to live with it, through thick and thin.

“Do you need any help?” you ask when he’s done talking, praying that there’s something you can do. “I can see what I can find.”

“Love,” he says, and you can see the smile on his face from miles apart, a fond, exasperated smile that you know too well. “Enjoy your time off, I’ll be home soon.”

“You will?” You know it’s selfish, wanting him to yourself all the time. He has a job to do, and you’re distracting him, making it harder for him to get the job done. But it’s so hard when he’s so gentle like this.

“I don’t fucking care what else happens, I’m seeing you tonight, love,” Tangerine promises, his voice grainy from whatever low-quality service he’s on.

“Yeah?” you ask, smiling. It doesn’t have to be true to make you feel protected. Safe. It could be an empty promise, but you’d still have the same reaction.

“Yeah,” he says. “It’s time I stop fucking about here and come to see my girls.”

You feel like a schoolgirl from the way you’re grinning into the phone and thinking about him. “I’ll be waiting, then.”

“Try to get some sleep.” You don’t know how he’s the one taking care of you right now, but it’s nice to have someone tell you what to do.

“I will. Goodnight, Tan.” As hard as you try to hide it, your voice sounds hopeful and lighter than you intend it to. The last thing you want to do is guilt him to coming home. God knows you’re already responsible for enough of his guilt.

“Night, love.”

You move through the apartment, missing him less and more at the same time. You don’t want to think about it anymore, but all you can seem to see in your mind is him- the ink tracing patterns on his skin, the cold metal of his rings, and the tidy curl of his hair. With him on the back of your eyelids, you fall asleep curled up on the couch like Jovie is in her own bed.

~*~

Tangerine’s footsteps are light on the pavement outside of his house from years of practice. There’s blood on his hands, there usually is, but he can’t care to wash it off when you’re right beyond the front door.

The key to the door slips in after a few tries and shoulders open the door, wincing as a cut along his ribs is pulled tight. He’ll have to ask you to help him with that later. For now, though, all he wants to do is see his daughter and you safely asleep. It hadn’t been a hard job, just tiring, and he's exhausted down to his bones that ache and scream for him to lie down.

He can’t do that, though, until he sees you- your face lighting up in surprise that he made it home so fast. He promised you he would, and he’d rather not show up at all than break that promise. The two of you stopped breaking promises to each other recently. Carefully, so he doesn’t wake anyone up, he steps out of his shoes and his suit jacket, putting them in their place in the hallway next to Jovie’s green raincoat and your heavy black overcoat. The very picture of a normal family, those coats. It brings a weary smile to his face.

He’s expecting you to be in bed, but you aren’t. When he finds you, you’re dead asleep on the couch, a threadbare blanket covering you as the tv plays dimly, some movie he hasn’t seen before. It looks romantic enough to be something you would pick, though.

For a moment, before he’ll carry you to your shared bed, he watches you. He’s known for years that you’re the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen, but when you’re sleeping there’s something so fragile about you. The usual strength that you carry in your frame is hidden by one of his old sweatshirts and a pile of pillows, and the creases that he usually finds in between your eyebrows aren’t there. No, like this you look like a gentler version of yourself. Someone who, maybe, hasn’t had to make so many hard choices or do so many shitty things.

But that’s not who you are, and it’s definitely not the person he fell in love with. It sounds horrible, to think that the unforgiving circumstances of your youth are what led you to him, but it’s the truth more than anything else. He can’t count the number of times you’ve bonded over your shared traumatic experiences or cried into his arms about things only he can understand.

When he tucks you into his chest and lifts you with an arm underneath your knees, you start to stir. He’s proud to see, however, that you don’t panic like he’s sure you would with anyone else. You just settle deeper into his chest and go back to sleep.

As much as he would love to immediately lay down beside you, he has to check on Jovie first. It’s irrational, his fear, but given everything that’s happened, he has to do it.

She’s fast asleep just like you are, stuffed bear held close to her chest. The nightlight plugged into her wall casts a blue light around the room, lighting her curly hair with a neon glow. You always say that Jovie looks just like him, she got his curls, but he thinks she looks like you. She has your eyes, smart and bright, and she has your strength.

Gently, he steps over to where her bed is and kisses her on her forehead. “Hey, Jovie-love. I’ll see you in the morning, yeah?” Once he’s satisfied that she’s okay, he brushes the hair out of her face and kisses her once before padding out and shutting the door without a sound.

You’re sitting up in bed when he makes it back to your room, the sleeves of his hoodie falling over your hands as you shuffle to the edge of the bed. “You’re here,” you state dumbly, a grin spreading across your face. “I thought you were being hopeful.” You rub some sleep out of your eyes and reach for him, and his heart fucking melts. He lets you draw him in closer to you and his hands find their way to cup your face. Like this with him standing, he’s much taller than you, and he’s able to really, truly see you. The relief plastered on your face and the beaming, not-quite-awake smile make everything that he had to go through to get here worth it.

“Since when have I been fucking hopeful?” Tangerine grins. “I made you a promise, didn’t I? Had to stick to it.” There’s so much truth behind his words that he’s too tired to unpack right now, but you don’t seem to mind. You especially don’t mind when he leans down and kisses you gently, at first, but with more passion when he remembers that you’re real, and you’re here, and you’re all his. Slowly, careful of his various minor injuries, he leans forward until you’re laying flat on the bed with him in between your legs. He thinks he hides the grimace of pain he makes when you skim your hands down his torso, just enough pressure to make pain bloom beneath his eyes, but you know him too well to let something like that slip his eyes.

You also know that he’s never going to ask you for help when he’s hurt. So, you stop him with a hand pushed against his chest and ask, a little breathlessly, but with narrowed eyes, “Are you hurt?”

He lets out a long, low groan and buries his head in your shoulder. He mutters under his breath, but clear enough for you to hear, “Can’t get fucking nothing by you, love.”

It’s not the right thing to say, because panic spreads across your face as you try and get him off of you, looking for any sign of pain. There are the normal bloodstains on his clothes, but you assumed those weren’t his- they usually aren’t. “Where are you hurt?” you ask, your voice an octave higher than natural and your hands not as steady as he knows they should be. “Are you okay? I swear, Tan, if you’re bleeding out and you wasted all this time-”

“-Love, does it look like I’m bleeding out?” he asks, tilting your chin up with his finger to get you to look him in the eyes. There’s still panic in your eyes, but it takes on a sharper edge when you start to focus like he knows you can. You take in his clothes, the flush on his cheeks, the strength of his arms, and the smile on his face. He doesn’t look any worse than all the other times he’s come home with scrapes and bruises.

“No,” you answer unsurely. “But you’re good at hiding things.”

Tangerine can’t help the grin that slips onto his face at your stubbornness. “It’s nothing big, yeah? Just a scrape on my ribs. Fucking prick used a knife on me.” You don’t look completely convinced, but he sees the fight drain from your posture. Whether or not you realize it, you lean into his touch and close your eyes, taking deep breaths in and out.

“I’m okay, love, I promise. Everything’s going to be alright” There he goes again, making promises that he has no right to make. But with you looking at him like moments ago, like the world was ending if he was, he can’t do anything except promise you everything. He may be a fighter, but, against you and Jovie, he’s a weak man.

In the end, you take him to the bathroom anyway and fix him up, complaining the whole time that his wound could have gotten infected if he didn’t clean it tonight. He argues back that you would have found out one way or another, so he didn’t need to tell you. Really, though, he doesn’t mind your hands smoothing over his skin, gently applying antiseptic and bandaging it up.

History has proven that he’ll let you get away with almost anything, not that you try much anymore. All you ask for is that he comes home at the end of a job, and he asks the same in return. It’s what you should have done since the beginning, but he knows it wasn’t always as clear as it is now.

It doesn’t matter anymore. You’re both here now, his arm thrown around your waist underneath the sheets, your soft breathing lulling him to a state of almost-sleep. He’ll fall asleep eventually, he’s still exhausted, but right now he’s taking the moment to enjoy being home.

With Jovie. With you.

His family.

Taglist loves: @venusthepirate @shadows-of-nyx @syd-vixious @thefloatingpickle @sallyp-53 @fictionalcomforts @s-haa @the-bisaster @phoenixhits @wee-little-mouse @cupofstarss @eefos @slut-f0r-u @lotustv @kpopgirlbtssvt @amyg1509 @tangerinesgf @earth-elemental18 @theredvelvetbitch

[dr-futbol-blog]

Sanctuary, Pt. 13

When Sheppard left his conversation with Teyla, he stumbled slightly heading toward the door. Here, we find him and Chaya seated on a balcony or a protuberance of some kind with a view of the city. What is interesting is that the picnic basket is behind Chaya and not behind Sheppard which is what one would expect if he was the one hosting this midnight picnic. The basket should be behind him and he should be the one offering things to her.

They have a lot of things laid out between them. Chaya even makes reference to "such variety of foods" indicating that there's comprehensive selection of every kind of delicacy they have. Chaya also tells Sheppard that she has been perusing the "information machine" Weir got her "on" which means that she's getting a really thorough insight into all things earthling.

The picnic, tasting earth foods, is also gathering intel since she is "a being of pure energy". We don't even know whether she's actually capable of tasting things, but she sure is putting up an act:

Chaya: This is delicious. Sheppard: Well, enjoy it while you can, 'cause it's the last of what we have. Chaya: Then I am honored. Sheppard: When McKay finds out, he's going to kill me.

The thing is, although Sheppard seems to pour her wine made from grapes they have traded with the Athosians later, his comment here that this is the last of it and that it's something McKay would care about indicates that what she is drinking to start with is coffee. Him referencing Athosian wine here would make no sense.

But what's really worth highlighting, and is entirely on brand for Sheppard, is that he has to mention McKay. Anywhere he goes, anyone he speaks with, he cannot not mention McKay. Things McKay does, says, or thinks, or has done, has said, or has thought, is something that Sheppard needs to report to other people at every available opportunity. Even here in what he calls a "romantic situation with a woman from another planet". It's a strange new situation but it's not enough for him to not want to talk about McKay while it's going on.

It should also be pointed out that it's when he lays back on his elbow and seems to relax into a lean that he brings up McKay. It's either the thought of McKay that made him lean into it or the leaning is what reminded him of McKay. And as soon as Sheppard has brought up McKay, she brings up Athar. She gives him a seductive smile and tells her that Athar will save him from McKay. Which should mean exactly nothing to Sheppard who hasn't made it a secret to her that he's not a believer.

In fact, even though Sheppard told her earlier that he respects that she believes, he doesn't share that. He has shown no interest in talking about religion or religions, and yet she persists.

Chaya: I'm fascinated by your many religions. So many beliefs. So many philosophies. Sheppard: Yeah, we've got a few of those. Chaya: So many contradictory faiths. Sheppard: Yeah, it's a bit of a mess. More?

He gives noncommittal replies. He has not consented to discussing religion. He hasn't consented to much of what has been happening recently.

Whether or not one sees Chaya as using supernatural means or just her feminine wiles, this is where the attempted seduction happens. The one that Sheppard mentions in the case file that Lucius read (and it is not coincidental that we return to this episode in connection with Lucius who bedded several women without their consent; "sometimes all at once"). She has a sultry look about her, keeps her gaze intensely on him. It doesn't seem like she has total control over him because we see flashes of him breaking free of her influence but it is clearly making him more open to suggestion. One of the most notable times comes when she first mentions truthfulness:

Chaya: I wasn't completely truthful with you about something.

And then loneliness.

Chaya: On Proculus, when I told you I did not feel lonely… Coming here, and being with you… it reminded me what it was like not to be alone.

Sheppard springs up and puts distance between them, taking several steps away from her. John Sheppard is lonely. This feeling he shares with her. He's lonely because he has chosen to be alone rather than let people get hurt for being anywhere near him. He had isolated himself in the most remote part of his world. But this is not something he wants to discuss with anyone, ever. His reaction clearly surprises her.

Chaya: What? Sheppard: Well, I mean, nothing. It's just that… this is the first time I've been in a romantic situation with a woman from another planet, and it just strikes me as really, um… Chaya: Wrong? Seppard: No. God, no! Just… just… funny. I'm sorry. I just thought that I would…

He feels funny. He feels funny being in this romantic situation with her. It's weird. It's strange. Even with the full force of her seductive stare, the wine, the night sky, the gentle ocean breeze what he feels is funny. He says "I just thought that I would--" and shakes his head. He can't find the words. Any words.

He doesn't know what he's here to do. Yes, he said that he had no intention of taking no for an answer from her but it's doubtful he ever intended for it to get this far. He's not heartless.

She is. She is literally without a heart, a being of pure energy. Even in a suggestible state (even if just for the wine and her lovely company), his reaction made it pretty clear that his intention was not to make out with her (he holds his hand up and says "No, God no."). It's also worth mentioning that it's a lie ("You said it yourself -- we're both human") that she uses to draw him in. And the last thing she tells him before he kisses her is a command ("Don't [leave]").

When he says "I'm not going anywhere" here, it's in response to her direct command.

Interestingly, this is the only time we see Sheppard kiss a woman other than when he's possessed by something (although an argument can be made here that he's not doing this out of his own volition either). Every other time, he is the one that is kissed. And twice when this happens, he confesses that he never sees it coming when they do. Even with the women that have the Ancient gene that seem to be drawn to him and that we can assume he is similarly physically drawn to. John Sheppard does not actively pursue women. All of this comes later, though.

So far, we haven't really seen him express interest in a woman. We were made to think that he had once had a crush on a woman on Earth who hadn't reciprocated it, but it's not made clear that was a woman, and once he smiled at a nurse. A few times he has introduced himself to women with a charming smile. Because he uses charm to gain something, it's difficult to tell whether or when he actually feels attraction. But this still seems out of character for him, on multiple levels.

Continued in Pt. 14

[moononmyfloor]

My Year End C-drama Review (2023)

Part 1

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17. Actors I newly discovered in 2023

Hong Yao, Wang Yinglu, Marcus Li, Tian Jiarui, Qin Hailu, Wang Ke

Some of these are new actors, some are already very experienced but I discovered only now. All of them provided phenomenal performances in their roles this year.

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18. Favorite Child Actors of the Year

Wang Haoze (Ou Zimo- Be Your Own Light), Phoebe Sun Yichen (Duoduo- Stay With Me)

Child actors in C-ent always baffle me, I have zero idea how they are SO good. Impeccable performance. I want to take them home. 🥺

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19. Feminist Cdramas of the year

Be Your Own Light, A Journey to Love

The premise of the first is about women to begin with, the second only partially. Most of the time the self-identifying feminist stories fail massively in realistic depiction of women, let alone idol dramas where the focus is elsewhere.

But these two shows really understood what women think and say, their priorities and what they want in life, how they conduct themselves....and not through the eyes of men who assume women crave xyz things only. The arcs and growths of women in these two shows felt very organic and relatable.

(I hear there were few other such dramas this year as well, eg: Faithful. But this is all I managed to watch huhu)

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20. A drama that let me down

Destined

The chemistry of the real-life pair Bai Jingting and Song Yi was adorable, but the story just wasn't my cup of tea.

I absolutely loved their spacious bedroom tho!

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21. Favorite BGM

Be Your Own Light- I Only Wish to Face the Light by Liu Yuning

Stay with Me- Stars Shine by Zhang Jiongmin, Xu Bin

I Am Nobody- Sea of Time by Zhou Shen

Young Blood 2- Lending a Ray of Light by WineQ (圈9)

Romance On the Farm- Letters from Spring by Su Yunying

Silence of the Monster- Cross a City Just to See You by Huang Yi

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22. Favorite wardrobes

Sui Yi (Sun Yihan)'s wardrobe in Silence of the Monster and Pang Hongmei (Peng Xiaoran)'s fits in Unshakable Faith

Oh they looked so delightfully vintage and exactly my style! 😍

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23. Best Breakups

Moxi and Jiagui (Gone With the Rain), Xiangyi and Wanmian (Mysterious Lotus Casebook)

I HAD to include this category simply because of these two pairs. I LOVED those two scenes. So mature! Such thorough discussion about how their feelings have changed over time, the frank admission that there are indeed some remnants left (because contrary to popular depiction, feelings don't POOF overnight), how they'd always consider the other as a special someone that they were lucky to have met in their lives, the wish to remain as tight friends in the future as well.... 🤌🤌🤌👏👏👏

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24. Worst character designs

Road Home

Gods know I only sat through this for Jing Boran in army gear and snow. The characters were so mind-blowingly flat despite the actors giving their best to "understand" their roles and make them relatable but there was only so much they could do. All the interpersonal relationships happened just because the writer said so. There was a child character who was passed from hand to hand for whenever the writer wanted a "warm childcaring and family moment" but was discarded without a glance the next second, I got second-hand abandonment issues from watching that lonely kid. I did not understand why anyone was doing anything at any given moment.

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25. Most convincing villains aka characters I loved to hate

Yuan Hao (Young Blood 2)- Gotta be one of the most dangerous villains I have ever seen. He was insanely smart, unpredictable and cunning AND strong, and it took all the heroes of the story to defeat him and still it was barely enough. He was so well written and portrayed, till the very end of the show the viewers weren't sure of the outcome of the battle.

Jiao Liqiao (Mysterious Lotus Casebook)- AHH Jiao jie! We all love a good unhinged female villain who isn't uwufied in the name of some weird "women should always be portrayed with tearjerking backstory" notion. Let her go crazy all over the place, we support women's wrongs as well as rights! She always meant what she said and did what she meant and it was terrifying to see.

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26. Favorite murder kittens of the year

Gong Yuanzhi (My Journey to You), Li Tongguang (A Journey to Love)

Oh these two bois were VERY disturbing individuals and I wouldn't go within 1 mile radius around them but were them such delightful affection starved meow meows with killer (ha!) hair and eye acting? Heck yes.

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27. A drama that I wished was longer

Romance On the Farm

I really appreciate how 3D and empathetically portrayed all the family members are. We are shown all their sides and what made them what they are today without making a mockery of Asian family values, but rather constructively analysing + celebrating the good parts.

And then there is a political thriller story arc.

And then there is "this is all but a game" part which I had to try very hard to pretend like it's ignorable.

And then there was the basic premiere of the pastoral country life story.

Clearly the dramamakers had LOTS of ideas. And you can see none of them were empty bite-more-than-can-chews but had actual potential.

If only.... it didn't try to do all this at once under the guise of a 26 ep lighthearted fluffy romcom genre.... it would've made such a difference.

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28. A drama I wanted to watch but couldn't

SO many! For all sorts of reasons.

Ray of Light, Butterflied Lover, The Road to Ordinary, Pledge of Allegiance, Where Dreams Begin, There Will Be Ample Time, Faithful, Stand By Me

ARGH!😭

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29. A drama I wish more people watched

Stay With Me

This is a Chinese BL, with Chinese cast, Chinese locations, but produced by a TW company. That's all I'm going to say about it, give it a try. You won't regret it. (Maybe don't watch last episode tho lol)

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30. Most favorite Cdrama of 2023

Mysterious Lotus Casebook

Why? Because... well if you are in the fandom you'd know, if you aren't... I can write ESSAYS about it so I won't 😂 In short, it was such a healing watch.

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31. A Cdrama I'm excited to see in 2024

JOL 2. Obviously.

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Conclusion

2023 served to solidify my belief that there's really no 'perfect' drama, what I can do is listening to the stories people have to share and then take what I want from them, and leave what I don't want behind. Some may resonate more with me, some less. Some may teach me new things, some may feel redundant. Sometimes you will enjoy only 50% of a drama and hate the rest, but that won't diminish the impact that 50% had on you. It could be a totally different experience for another viewer and that's fine. I watched all the DMBJ shows this year as well (but didn't speak about them in this list since my focus was on 2023) and it really was an exercise on not being overly critical and going with the flow or you would totally miss out on all the good things DMBJ had to bring.

Overall I enjoyed 2023 Cdramaland a lot. I hope this review helped some of you to try out dramas that you didn't know existed/were hesitant to press play or continue on!

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More Posts by Me

[beesmygod]

i like thinking way too much about fromsoft games. there’s something about the light touch the writers use to carve out their worlds that just absolutely tickles my brain. writing way too much about the most trivial details using college essay formats is the easiest exercise to make sure my brain can still make basic connections and convey those connections to other people. but as a lore prescriptivist (snob), i try to only stick to what’s in front of me without attempting to drag in outside resources or succumb to the apparent impulse to engage in wild speculation that many fans find themselves mired in. additionally, i try to make things as clear as possible for the fandom rubbernecks who like to read lore dumps about things that are totally outside their wheelhouse (i do this).

here’s something really annoying to keep in mind with these games: they write the scripts in english and translate them to japanese. but the dev team obviously works in japanese and have a tendency to reveal connections that are either relevant to unlocking questions not addressed in the game (such as the parasitic wall hugger having the file name “Prince Izalith”). there are also inconsistencies between the english and japanese translations, which raises more questions about what the authorial intent REALLY is. so the best we can do is filter the noise, ignore the innate desire to put words or ideas in any developer’s mouth, and stick to things you can copy-paste to support your argument.

that said i have one theory i refuse to give up entirely on the basis that it is really funny to think about: Gwyn’s firstborn is the father of Crossbreed Priscilla.

look out bitch! look out bitch!

i will go over all the reasons that support my argument and then i will discuss the objective problems with my theory, which is absolutely not one i think anyone holds but me. generally, the community is in agreement that her father is traitor turned mad scientist Seath The Scaleless. seath is an albino dragon who, due to his jealously of the scales that granted eternal life to the other dragons, betrayed his brethren and helped the gods wipe the once everlasting dragons off the planet. his bottom half looks like microwaved tinfoil because he’s been fucking around with crystals. also he was just born fucked up.

seath was rewarded with dukedom and a slice of Gwyn’s (king of the gods. who are a race separate from humans, rather than literal gods) soul.

first let’s talk about what supports my theory, so you can get a feel for the timeline of events and the social mores within the world of dark souls (?? i typed this)

PRO:

Crossbreed Priscilla lives in the Painted World of Ariamis: this is explicitly a location for things and people that the gods want to either forget about or sentence to exile. there are very few residents in the painting; the entire population is priscilla, the corpse of xanthous king jeremiah, a rotting dragon descendant (a wyvern), phalanx from demon souls who got lost somehow, a handful of hollows and skeleton wheels, and velka’s crow worshippers.

Xanthous Crown - A mysterious item once worn by the Xanthous King Jeremiah, the legendary exile

Peculiar Doll - There once was an abomination who had no place in this world. She clutched this doll tightly, and eventually was drawn into a cold and lonely painted world.

Dark Ember - The church long hid the forbidden black ember, and no living blacksmith knows of it. Occult weapons were used to hunt the Gods, and are effective against their followers and kin

velka, an unseen goddess with a single worshipper, is an entire other kettle of fish, but she’s not as complicated as people make her out to be. she was banished or killed by the gods for participating in the plot to overthrow them (this is another subject that causes people to spin out). i dont have time to get into this, it just matters that she’s persona non-grata.

priscilla herself is described as a “crossbreed bastard child” in her soul description. this confirms that she is the result of an unauthorized fuck and suck. as the “antithesis to all life”, she wields a weapon called the lifehunt scythe that mows down gods and drains any mortal that tries to use it.

Lifehunt Scythe - Even the Gods feared Priscilla's lifehunt ability, and in the hands of a mortal, its power will turn upon its wielder.

why the fuck would gwyn keep around someone who could kill him and everything he’s been working for? the man was so freaked out over the idea of the age of gods ending and losing power that he threw himself on a pyre and invented a new way to suffer to prolong the inevitable. why is there a black knight, gwyn’s most trusted troops, protecting the doll and one of three berenike troops in the entire game protecting priscilla herself? the answer is the same reason why he kept gwyndolin in spite of her snake leg deformity and simply hid her away: she’s family.

CONCLUSION: PRISCILLA IS GWYN’S GRANDDAUGHTER

Gwyn’s firstborn was erased from history for an unknown, unforgivable trespass: the amount of Mad gwyn is at his firstborn son cannot be understated; statues across lordran depicting him have been shattered, he was stripped of his godhood, and he was exiled from anor londo.

Ring of the Sun’s Firstborn - Lord Gwyn's firstborn was a god of war, but his foolishness led to a loss of the annals, and rescinding of his deific status. Today, even his name is not known.

Sunlight Blade - The power of sunlight, manifested as lightning, is very effective against dragons. When the eldest son was stripped of his deific status, he left this on his father's coffin, perhaps as a final farewell.

“foolishness” is such a weird ass turn of phrase for something that got you disowned so hard your dad forgot who you were. its so like...mild. just an observation. an example of a thing gwyn specifically might find unforgivable is fucking a dragon, as they are his mortal enemies and he just spent all that time killing them.

you DO eventually meet this son, The Nameless King, in ds3.

CONCLUSION: THE NAMELESS KING’S TRESPASS WAS SHAMEFUL ENOUGH TO HIDE WHAT HE DID AND WHO HE WAS, BUT NOT KILL HIM

The Nameless King has been deified by dragons and their worshippers: this one is so weird. by ds3 you are told outright that the nameless king “sacrificed everything to ally himself” with dragons and those who want to become them. he’s not even the first dark souls character to do it all for the nookie.

archdragon peak, a location where dragon worshippers go to begin their physical transformation, is riddled with statues of him looking badass. this is also where you fight him and his drake (it has 4 wings, but no everlasting scales) friend, the ambiguously named “king of the storm”. its not clear if the “king of the storm” is a title they share together or what the nameless king calls himself when he’s with his dragon lover or if thats the name of the dragon. regardless, killing the dragon begins the phase 2 solo fight against the nameless king. making this more confusing is that in japanese, both phases are named “the nameless king” and calls the king of the storm a wyvern instead of a stormdrake.

Lightning Storm - Once a slayer of dragons, the former king and wargod tamed a Stormdrake, on which he led a lifetime of battle. This miracle is likely a tale of their bond.

wow. love truly conquers all. gay rights!

CONCLUSION: THE NAMELESS KING IS COOL

Seath has never had sex: look at him. no way.

MY THEORY: gwyn’s firstborn, overtaken with sexual desire, fucked a dragon. the result of their copulation was priscilla, an abomination whose innate abilities made her extremely dangerous. gwyn threw his firstborn’s ass out from a combination of shame and anger, but could not bring himself to kill either. ariamis was commissioned to create a world for her, which became an all purpose dump for shit gwyn didnt want to think about any more.

AGAINST:

Priscilla is white: it’s pretty hard to ignore the fact that seath and priscilla share the same very unique skin tone...color palate? you know what i mean. the most common theory is that priscilla is the result of seath’s experiments or his daughter by way of gwynevere. what we do know about seath’s experiments is that the failed results transformed women into snake-ish creatures called pisacas. as stated many times in the series: a snake is a failed dragon (this is true in real life too). maybe one of them was successful.

BUT: there’s some problems with this, actually. for one thing priscilla isn’t albino; her eyes are white and she’s fluffy, like the everlasting dragons we do see. gwynevere married some guy named flann and booked it out of anor londo years ago.

Ring of the Sun Princess - The Princess of Sunlight Gwynevere left Anor Londo along many other deities, and later became wife to Flame God Flann.

so the gwynevere theory is out. it’s more likely that she’s a successful experiment who got too scary so she had to go in the paint. i dont really get why he was trying to turn women into dragons, if thats what he was up to. maybe he was trying to have sex. he was tired of using his j/o crystals or whatever.

Yorshka and The Painter: okay, we can assume that the painter of the next painted world, a dragon scaled young girl, is the daughter of priscilla and her weird husband mentioned in the ds3 dlc. i dont get company captain yorshka at all. i have nothing. she’s obviously a dragon crossbreed but has 2 insane things that make her completely impossible to make sense of.

first, she has fucking neck tentacles? no one else has this shit. what is that.

second, she calls herself the sister of gwyndolin. what! huh?! excuse me?

it’s insane enough that one of the dlcs revealed that gwyn had ANOTHER surprise kid who didnt get to share in the narcissistic family naming convention and was forgotten by history (filianore). but now there’s a DRAGON one?! i don’t know man. she’s inscrutable and i don’t understand her relation to the original crossbreed or why she didnt get painting’d. her existence is pretty hard to patch over with my theory. i dont think the nameless king was pumping them out and then shipping them over to gwyn for him to deal with more than once. mostly because gwyn has been dead forever by the time ds3 happens. maybe gwyndolin just handles these problems better now that shes de-facto ruler of anor londo.

well, i guess that’s all i actually have. my point with all this (besides entertaining the three people who enjoy reading DS lore) is that i can recognize the obvious flaws in my crackpot theory, yet it offers me the most satisfying answer because the idea of getting disowned for being a furry (scalie i guess) is really really funny. and as we all know, the comedy is when you need a 2 million word explainer about having sex with dragons. well. bye.

[ghost-of-a-system]

Hey! I wanted to ask you about some of your experiences, if that's alright.

In comics it were mentioned several times about complicated gender experience and not being able to feel home in body. We relate to it a lot, so I wanted to ask, how you cope with a feeling of not being able to achieve body that fits you? Or how yall manage decisions regarding changes? (not necessarily body-related, if that's easier to answer)

For us, even outside of gender presentation, it would be impossible to have body we would be comfortable with, some things can't be changed. And we are pretty desperate to find any way to cope with this feeling.

Anyway, hope you will be having a good day! Your blog really helped me to feel less lonely in my experience.

it is pretty impossible for us to have a body that we are comfortable with, too. the overwhelming majority of us are nonhuman in some form, so no amount of clothing, makeup, or hairstyles will be enough to remedy the alien feeling of the body.

certain clothes, accessories, etc. can slightly alleviate the discomfort, in our experience, but only in the sense of feeling more individual to ourselves. we have yet to find anything that will ever make the body feel like "home", or our own, personally. i'm not sure we ever will, just due to the nature of how our alters present.

the biggest help for us might not be one that suits everyone, or one that's a desirable solution, but i'll share it anyway: a lot of the time, we view the body as a separate being, a separate responsibility. assuming that you're coming from our "osdd-1 and gender" comic, think back to the car analogy jola used. now let me add, the body is like our car; we have to wash it and take care of it and "fix it" when things go wrong with it. the car is something that we utilize and not something that we become. the body is something we utilize, and not something that we become.

it isn't an ideal solution, but it's eased part of our issue. i guess it's just made it easier for those feelings of discomfort to not sprout up at all when fronting. it doesn't fix it all of the time, though. especially with no inner world, words can't really begin to describe our longing to just be in our actual bodies again. one of us has been working on a comic about that, i believe. i wish i could give better advice, but we're in the same boat of desperation as you, i'm afraid.

circling back to the question of "how we manage decisions regarding changes", it really depends on the change. for bigger, more life-changing issues, our protector calls the shots for us. for more minor things, we tend to either agree or have no opinion on what decision we opt for. or someone may randomly front and just make decisions anyway. that's how we end up with suddenly bright dyed hair, cut contact with people, new possessions or changing plans without discussion with anyone. it really depends.

on a more lighthearted note, we're happy to hear that our blog has made you feel less alone. nobody deserves to feel such a way and we hope that we continue to do so, for you all and for others.

[besiegedhunter]

Projekt Red's second chance and significance of life.

"Without Kal'tsit she would be gone by now."

A quote from Red's module and one that always stuck out to me for one reason but I never thought to consider what else it informs about Red's character.

And here I want to delve into Red's life, how this quote informs her story and how she lost it.

Also at the end I want to discuss a possibility regarding Kal'tsit saving Red that's quite interesting with what it means. But all that is under the cut.

So to begin with this should be the context behind Kal'tsit saving Red's life which sadly there's no information on the event itself but we do know what was happening with Red and how she felt going into it.

Now we can gather from Red's Trust 1 that Red had been raised by Grandma for a very young age. A time that we know was very unpleasant for her:

Now this is in the least very far into her training since it served as the last test. We don't know what else she went through. We just know that Red's entire identity is around hunting wolves and that she cuts anything that gets close (likely because of her time in those wilds).

But her time with Grandma influences her even further.

We know from her files she has bad social and educational skills. Her module states too that she doesn't know what to use an salary and Reed's file stating that Red is a lone wolf also informs how she feels about socialization.

But this paints an even more dire picture. One of being completely overwhelmed and broken by what she was up against now, that the severity is comparable to her time in the wilderness that Grandma threw her into.

As it says, she didn't know life's meaning, because Grandma gave her purpose. She doesn't have it for herself. And the direness of how much she didn't want to learn in informed by later when she joins Rhodes and in her mind it was just while she decided what to do. A decision that took upwards of three years. (Doctor leaves Sarcophagus in 1096 - Il Siracusano 1099)

But it's at this point, where Red just wanted out of this maze and was coming up against how unprepared for this world when she met Kal'tsit, a Doctor.

Now we don't know what exactly happened but Red makes clear that she would've died without Kal'tsit. Either due to literally needing medical aid or because without her guidance she would've died either way. It could be both.

But if she was going to die, who would mourn? Like it's sad but think about it. At this point, she doesn't know Kal'tsit or Rhodes, she doesn't have a family she remembers and Grandma only cares about her success and has time to get someone else to achieve her goal.

That's the sad reality of Red at this point and to a degree to now. Rhodes would mourn but the greater world wouldn't feel a thing and even among Rhodes it's a select few who'd truly feel sad.

But through Kal'tsit she was given a second chance to live and to enjoy life but here's the curious thing: even with a second chance things don't change.

She remains lost and unsure of her future:

She continues being a wolf hunter. She gains a few people who she's close to but not very many and even Kal'tsit, who saved her and who desires to help anyone who needs it finds that she can only do so little:

And the worst bit?

The person who put her through hell, exhausted a life's worth of possibilities and didn't prepare her for the world still has a hold on her.

As of Il Siracusano Red has left Rhodes Island. Kal'tsit doesn't know if she's going to return and Red is doing Grandma's bidding. She has no one again but Grandma and is so close to realizing her goal.

Through the perspective of her having a second chance to make the most of her life, nothing has changed and she's lost what she actually gained from it.

But time and time again it's stated in her files and outside that she must decide for herself and break free and Kal'tsit has managed to teach Red:

And in Il Siracusano, when she's left Rhodes she still values Kal'tsit:

As much as she still is chained to Grandma:

But we've got half, if not say a quarter of this story. A story which has changed very little from the beginning but which hammers in the point that she can change but only through her own choices and ability.

Now, I do have an extra bit concerning Red's life being an significant thing and the angle of her having a second chance that takes all of this and elevates it and it's how improbable it is that Kal'tsit was there to save Red in the first place.

It could be the case that some Rhodes Island operators found her and got her to the landship where Kal'tsit learned the situation and decided to raise Red but how Red speaks of it "if not for Kal'tsit she'd be gone." and how significant their relationship is it feels like Kal'tsit was the one who discovered her.

And that is almost impossible. For the same reason that anyone coming upon Red prior to Rhodes Island is difficult (her not interacting with anyone) but Kal'tsit is running Rhodes Island at this time, the head of the medical department. If she was the one who found Red herself she'd need to be in Siracusa and we know if it was prior to that she wouldn't have taken Red in, as she didn't Passenger, Folinic or Crownslayer.

So I've had a theory that Kal'tsit discovered Red while looking for Crownslayer in Siracusa. Possibly once Rhodes Island was set up, giving her the ability to take people in at that point.

Now if this is correct and Kal'tsit was looking for Crownslayer then effectively these events would have to happen to and did save Red:

Someone makes the sarcophagus

Ursus discovers the sarcophagus

Crownslayer's Dad and Kal'tsit work to research the sarcophagus

The sarcophagus purge happens and Kal'tsit saves Crownslayer

Crownslayer has to either: be a Lupo so Kal'tsit takes her to Siracusa or have Siracusan family

These events lined up for Kal'tsit to look for Crownslayer in Siracusa to then meet and save Red's life. This to me is such a wild series of events that Red is an anomaly to be alive if it's true that Kal'tsit only met Red because of Crownslayer.

And I think it not only makes Red's "second chance" even more important as it's practically a miracle but also it means that Red and Crownslayer are even moreso interlinked.

If Crownslayer died then Red would've also which really further highlights how entwined their stories are (and how funny it is that Red keeps bullying her)

Another thing it does is connect Red to the sarcophagus which is actually significant because Red's probably the playable character most connected to the sarcophagus's ability to turn characters into animals, through her ability to scare Lupos.

It's not only something that Beast Lords, manifestations of nature can do but when Zaaro does the same thing as Red, Vigil describes it like this:

If what Red and Zaaro's fear is targeting is kinship, something shared by Ancients and Beast Lords then it feels like this fear targets the same thing that the sarcophagus does to turn the character (like Mephisto) into the animal they are.

Which, it's not like Red has any relationship to the sarcophagus but through being saved by Kal'tsit looking for Crownslayer after that incident, it gives a reason for it to be brought up in regards to her and does connect them in a way.

Which is some really curious things for one detail that I must repeat: is not confirmed! We know nothing!

But hey when Red gets her event they may touch upon it. Or maybe an oprec or an Alter. Just something, please!

Hope it was a decent enough read!

[halalgirlmeg]

Battle of the Hijabs (Under read more because this got longer than I thought and I started ranting about why representation in media fucking sucks atp and why the TV show Quantico is the worst):

Coming in at number 1, getting the gold: LITERALLY ALL THE HIJABIS IN WE ARE LADY PARTS like the variation in hijabs alone is so beautiful I love it, iykyk, Stream Bashir with the Good Beard. Like very real to life with different styles and personalities, don't you just love when shows actually treat hijabis as real human beings

All the hijabis from every version of Skam (except Italy fuck you)

Goldie is like next bc the actress isn't a hijabi but like I feel like they depicted being a hijabi really well for the most part like with her thinking she wanted to take it off and realizing everything about herself was nice it was very complex and well done imo

Qadri's next cause tbh I liked her style and the fact that she wore al Amira hijabs. I know everyone's like oh those are for little girls or they're ugly but tbh it makes sense bc I feel like being that she's training to be a surgeon and it is very convenient cause who's trying to be calling a code and fight with some chiffon or jersey material?? Not me! (They lose points for that one scene cause you mean to tell me she's only going to use her hijab to stop the bleeding and nothing else?? Come again?? She's in a hospital!!)

Next is Adina from The Bold Type, tbh idk how to feel cause she's a lesbian and played by Nikhol Boosheri and I was excited at the time but tbh some of her choices def had me scratching my head and I feel like they could've did a bit more to showcase her identity ykwim

Marjan from 911 Lone Star cause bro what the hell was the praying scene, did y'all talk to one Muslim? Download the Learning to Pray app on your phone I'll send you a link like be SO FR, then them saying her masjid kicked her out bc her hijab accidentally came off (which happens so much in television) like...again did you talk to anyone, I could see backlash yes but I just *sigh* again which Muslims did you talk to like idk about y'all but a stiff tug or strong wind has tested my hijab before like it happens, we cover back up and move on

Bottom 2 but not thee bottom, Nadia from Elite (hear me out cause the bottom of the list will make sense) obviously its so low because she wore hijab and they had some decent commentary at first, and then removed her hijab, and for Guzman ol racist crusty lip ass like, this who you risking it all for??? GIRL??? Like if Vic Mensa asked to see my hair I'd let him see that and much else (I'M KIDDING, I'd marry him first ok, astaghfirullah) no fr like but it's even that like they made it that she's more confident without her hijab people like her more, like it's obviously same old song like hijab is removed and suddenly liberation like they could've showed it in a more tasteful way if they wanted to but what did I expect from Europeans esp Spaniards like

And coming in Dead Last Raina Amin, tbh girl its not even about you...WHO WROTE THIS. Cause I watched it back in the day cause you know representation but like *pauses before I sip my coffee* hold tf on. Like where to even begin, the cop propaganda? What do you have to prove, cause they tried to get me i would've been like get tf off my porch. Like and the FBI? How did they even recruit the twins? The government watchlist? Blair Imani slid up in the masjid to snitch? I mean, what the hell? And this show had so much talent to be so extremely questionable (and that is putting it mildly). But we're discussing the twins rn. Raina specifically. So it doesn't even stop there. Like so much was wrong, so you mean to tell me she's in love with a man who used to be an IOF soldier, who helped them actively target Palestinian women for God knows what (the show implied certain things), like WTF is this, like everyone wants to talk about her removing her hijab and kissing him but like we have bigger fish to fry, that is like at the bottom of the problem list. Like did we see the man they put her with and she still loved him later EYE. And then two more things and then I'll shut up. Okay so they were working for the Government to infiltrate terrorist cells whatever bc they were going to attack American soil. No mention of how terrorist groups like the ones they're depicting mostly target minority sect Muslims and lead to their deaths that usually go unnoticed by anyone who is not them, Iran and Nigeria, if I remember correctly are where a lot of the casualties are from. I hate propaganda cause its the same old shit like we really pushing the agenda huh? And hijab removal scene again worst part cause you know what I hated after this other stuff cause red flags with major red lights and a bullhorn. But there was something where they had to change their look because their twins but like as one person but one is a hijabi, the other is not. So they were like we have to find a middle ground, someone who's easily targeted because they're muslim but also loose (I'm paraphrasing but you see what I'm saying?) Like fuck y'all. Fuck whoever wrote this. Like from head to toe Quantico is like an absolute clusterfuck of everything terrible people do with hijab characters (not to mention the rest of the cast but that would be even longer) but dead last because like maybe some of the others on this list at least tried if they're not terribly misguided but this depiction is like dangerous, it's a reminder why we don't just get all our info from TV and other fictional narratives, we talk to real people and we learn real things because this is absolute bullshit to say the least