wait no cuz when I go to therapy and talk about me I feel like a spoiled brat because I think of it and I have food and a phone and a life and some people don't have that but then I also have major things wrong with me and my life so then Idk and I feel like others people's problems are more worth her time
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life's not a race and all that but how can i not be upset when i meet someone 10+ years younger who does things i take pride in way better than i will ever do
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Me trying to get out of a conversation I didn’t want to be in after i said multiple times I didn’t want to talk/explain myself (that started after a throw away comment abt my experiences with dealing with health care MY WHOLE FUCKING LIFE): i just don’t want to talk about it, don’t take it personally (PLEASE FOR FUCKS SAKE)
My Ma immediately talking about it (advocating for them, not only that but in a way of trying to explain why i was wrong about my feelings about it): oH I leArNEd Not To YEaRs AgO (i think you’re absolutely targeting me every time you don’t completely agree with me or doesn’t do exactly what i say when i say)
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the first half of my birthday was very nice, I think despite everything this is the best birthday I’ve had but I am very much sleepy and going to end up crying again later tonight so like balance I guess
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maybe this ounce of male attention will make me feel something
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Like how the hell some people write so amazing that it makes my head hurts...
For real...Beyond evil fanfics are the best things i ever read...like i feel everything 1000%more than anything and i don't get tired ?? What are you doing to me ? Why am i so deep into this shit why i can't look at anything why everyone and everything is so Amazing? What am i doing with my life?
I can't...i just can't ༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽
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days when you keep pacing around your house, re-applying makeup and adjusting your outfit and hair, hoping that something comes up.
those are the worst.
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i am not her, i feel weak, fragile... I feel like a petal beside her, she is a whole bouquet, pretty, colorful, full of joy... but i am just a petal that never found her flower and has lost her beauty, now she has to exist as a single petal, flies here and there, but will never come back to the place she belonged, the time when she felt complete and beautiful now seems like a lost memorie.
i've discovered a lot of things, been trough hard times, learned, but it all seems to not be enough
i am still feeling like a child who is about to realize how hard life can be .
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The question is could I get any emptier feeling? No, I don’t think so…
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look what not being pursued romantically ever in my life did to me. i developed friendship problems after 25 lol
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