#I had completely forgotten about this fic

[lordprettyflackotara]

paradise || sam golbach

SMUT. minors dni fr. 18+ this one is ummm. i’d say it’s for the humiliation & harder kink leaning girls only !! i have so many fics in the work i promise imma feed all of the different fandoms that follow me🙏🏼 enjoy mwah !

How did one woman change Sam’s life so drastically?

How did you change his life so drastically?

Sam couldn’t escape you. He thought of you every day, the image of you burned into his mind. You were like a parasite, one that had buried itself into the depths of his brain.

It didn’t matter what he did or where he went. He tried everything to forget you. Or at the very least to think of you less. Sam felt like he was slipping, losing control of his own thoughts. He traveled wherever, trying to distract himself.

It didn’t matter where he went, he felt like he wasn’t in control of his own desires.

Logically, Sam knew anything he felt for you was wrong. Any filthy fantasy, craving, or romantic thought, was a sin. After all, you were Colby’s little sister.

Colby was only a couple of years older than you, the age gap one that originally steered Sam away from you. Growing up with Colby, you were always around. You did your own thing, preoccupied in building a simple life for yourself. You opted to be out of the spotlight, politely declining any invitation to be apart of their content.

But then, you disappeared for a few years. Sam hadn’t seen you since high school. You went away to an out of state University, while Sam and Colby both moved across the country to pursue being content creators. If Sam was being honest with himself, despite his current obsession, he had forgotten about you for a while.

After all, he was in the major league now. He had girlfriends come and go, hookups, anything and everything he could ever need. Sam firmly believed, at the time at least, he was in paradise. He was on a high, one that he thought he couldn’t be knocked down from. So when one of Colby’s cousins was getting married, he didn’t think twice about the invitation, nor being his plus one.They did everything together, both boys pretty much members of each other’s families. Everything should’ve went the way Sam expected it to, but it didn’t.

Those predicted thoughts and plans were all shattered the moment he saw you. You were borderline unrecognizable. Sam couldn’t figure it out, staring at you as you walked down the aisle as one of the bridesmaids. Your face had matured, a decent amount of your soft skin revealed in the dress you were wearing. Your back was almost completely exposed, the sight making Sam shift awkwardly in his chair like a thirteen year old boy.

He could feel the blood rushing to his cock, his face turning the faintest shade of pink. Was he really getting hard? Over seeing some skin? Sam mentally rolled his eyes at himself. He had seen much crazier things. Yet, the simplicity of your back was enough to send him in a frenzy. As you gazed over at the audience, your eyes met his, a small smile creeping up your lips. Sam delivered a discreet wave, your smile growing bigger at the sight. Your eyes then flickered back to the bride, your attention returning to the wedding.

Somehow, someway, for some reason, that made Sam jealous. Sam was not a jealous person. Or he didn’t consider himself to be. The after party was more Sam’s speed, the loud music and alcohol provided something he was used to. Sam didn’t drink often, deciding to stay sober for the most part. (After one too many drunken hookups, he learned his lesson.) He monitored Colby the best he could, the brunette talking up a girl Sam didn’t recognize.

Awkwardly Sam sat at one of the round tables, his phone dead and eyes glazed over from boredom.

“Sam?”

Your voice was like heroin.

Sam’s head perked up, his eyes flickering to yours. You sat down beside him, skipping the small talk and immediately trying to catch up. As you told him about your University adventures Sam couldn’t help but stare at you. Your elegant makeup complimented you perfectly, your pink lips moving a mile a minute. He hung onto every word, every time you laughed at one of his jokes.

The party was beginning to die down, older family members going their separate ways. You nervously bit your bottom lip, asking Sam a question he could’ve only dreamed of:

“Hey, do you wanna get out of here?”

Sam felt euphoric when you pulled him into the back seat of your car. When you placed your lips against his, when your small hands began to fiddle with his belt.

He remembered the sweet sound of your moans. The way you whimpered for him, begging for him to not stop. How tight your cunt squeezed him, the way your lips pressed against his with such passion. As if you had been yearning for him all of those years you were away. The way you looked into his eyes as you came around his cock was all Sam could ever think about.

Attempting to return to his normal life was pure agony. Having to look Colby in the eye the next day was a nightmare, his little sister’s mouth wrapped around his cock the night before. Attempting to continue making content was even harder, Sam’s mind wrapped around the memory of you. He tried to ignore it, but his fans knew something was up. The comments of concern grew overwhelming, the blonde deciding to take a break from social media all together.

Colby recommended that he try to take a well deserved vacation to try to get himself together. Colby didn’t think much of his behavior, figuring he was just in a slump. Sometimes making too much content was draining. He figured he just needed a long break.

Sam tried. Genuinely, he tried to move on. He visited Florida, the waves of the beach not enough to drown out the memory of your moans. He tried New York next, the tourist actions not indulging enough to get him to forget you. Every time he attempted to focus his mind would begin remembering, the sight of you falling apart on his fingers.

It was never enough.

He sat in his hotel room, contemplating booking another flight. Maybe to Mexico. Maybe that would fix it. He flipped apps to instagram, a picture of you showing up on his timeline. Of course. What were the odds? You were posing with a friend, standing in front of a picture of your University.

He bit his bottom lip, knowing his desire to come see you was absurd. It was reckless, completely and utterly insane. If you didn’t react well, his friendship with Colby could be entirely ruined. But what if you wanted him just as bad as he wanted you?

Fuck it.

Sam stood at the door of your dorm, becoming increasingly nervous. He could feel his heart beginning to pound, his mouth running dry. Admittedly he felt guilty about finding your personal information like this. Then having the audacity to show up at your front door unannounced. He almost thought about walking away, but then he heard your laugh. The mesmerizing sound of your sweet laughter.

Sam cleared his throat, before knocking on your door. It was quiet for a moment, the sound of locks being unlocked filling his ears. Timidly you pulled the door open, surprised to see anyone at your doorstep. Your eyes widened at the sight of Sam, shocked he was standing in front of you.

“Sam?”

Sam could feel his heart pounding louder, adrenaline running through his veins. He brushed past you, entering the apartment. You awkwardly closed the door, more confused than anything. “I know this is inappropriate but I can’t stop thinking about you,” Sam confessed. He ran a hand through his hair, pacing back and forth. “I don’t know why, but ever since that night at the wedding I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. It’s been driving me crazy,” He continued, rambling on.

You tilted your head to the side as you watched him pace back and forth like a madman. “I have tried everything in my power to move on. But I can’t. Your pussy is like fucking heroin, okay? And I can’t stop thinking about you and that night,” Sam babbled. His tongue was moving a mile a minute, showing no signs of slowing down.

“Do you know how many times i’ve jerked off to the thought of you? Just the mere thought? You’re so addicting that I-”

An awkward cough came from behind him, your roommate gawking at the blonde in front of her. She looked back and forth from you to him, as if she was trying to process what was happening. “This is Sam?” She asked, dumbfounded. Sam felt his face turn red as his eyes flickered back and forth from you to her. Your face was nearly as dark as his.

“Uh huh.”

“The Sam that fucked you at the wedding?”

“Uh huh.”

“The same guy who made you cum like five times-”

“Emma!”

Emma raised her hands in defeat, sliding off of her chair. “I’m going to let you guys uh, figure this out,” She said. You watched as she walked over to the stairs, nodding profusely and giving you two thumbs up. You refrained from face palming, turning your attention back to Sam.

Sam was tongue tied, to say the very least. He was filled with embarrassment, his red face telling you everything you needed to know. You approached Sam slowly, placing both hands on his shoulders. “Did you mean that?” You asked softly. Sam worked up the courage to meet your eyes, looking down at you. Your hands on his shoulders was enough to make butterflies fly around in his stomach.

“Mean what?”

“Everything you just said.”

Sam was dumbfounded by your question. Had he not been clear enough?

“If you asked me to get on my knees and beg you to fuck me id do it without a second thought.”

You bit your bottom lip, eyeing Sam’s body.

“And Colby?”

He raised his eyebrows, tilting his head to the side.

“What about him?”

You sighed, taking a step closer to him.

“Does he have any idea about this? About us?”

The blonde took a moment to rack his brain, searching for any clues he might’ve accidentally left. Obviously he hadn’t said a word to Colby, refraining from bringing you up at all. If he happened to bring you up, Sam would change the topic immediately. “No he doesn’t,” He answered honestly. You pressed your body against his, the room seemingly growing to a hundred degrees. “He’s going to find out eventually you know, are you going to be able to handle that?” You asked.

Handle being skinned alive by Colby? Piece of cake. An absolute walk in the park. Sam would do it in a heartbeat, all for you. “Yeah,” Sam agreed. His eyes darted down to your lips, the urge to kiss you overwhelming him.

“I think you should stay for a while.”

Sam couldn’t help himself, the blonde leaning forward and pressing his lips to yours. They were as soft and plump as he remembered, your arms wrapping around his neck. As delicate as the kiss was, Sam remembered a very important part of why he was addicted to you. You liked it fucking rough.

Sam’s hands slithered down to your waist, pulling you closer to him as if you were going to disappear. “Jump for me,” He whispered, his lips refusing to stray from yours. You did as he asked, wrapping your legs around his waist. Your back roughly hit your living room wall, knocking over a couple of photo frames off of a shelf. You gasped as you heard them clatter to the floor, Sam’s lips trailing down your face to the side of your neck.

“Sam be careful, I do have a roommate you know,” You whimpered, his lips preoccupied with littering your neck with hickies. His hips grinded against yours, your core beginning to throb with desire. “She’ll be fine, you can tell her about the five more orgasms I give you,” Sam purred, licking the side of your neck. His lips trailed up to your ear, nibbling at it gently. You groaned his name, tugging at his blonde hair.

“I’ve been waiting for this for so long,” Sam confessed, his hips bucking against yours. You giggled, meeting his gaze. “You better fuck me like you mean it then,” You replied. Sam smirked at your response. He carried you over to the couch, tugging at the hem of your shirt. He needed to see you, to feel you. You both stripped each other, desperate to see the other one exposed. Sam tried to ignore his raging boner as he admired you.

“Fuck, you’re ethereal,” Sam praised. He lowered himself down to your stomach, teasingly pressing kisses down to your cunt. He wrapped his arms around your thighs, throwing your legs over his shoulders. Purposefully he fanned his hot breath over your folds, your cunt dripping in arousal. “So wet, this all for me?” Sam asked. You attempted to push him into your cunt, his head not moving.

“Sammy, no teasing, please,” You whined. Sam wasn’t one to deny you of that, lowering himself into your cunt. His tongue lapped at your slick like a starved man, rotating licking to sucking at your clit. Roughly he brought two fingers to your entrance, relishing in the feeling of your walls struggling to take his fingers. Your juices coated his chin, his eyes meeting yours. “How are you going to take my cock if you’re struggling to take my fingers?” Sam asked teasingly. You moaned in response, his fingers curling and hitting your g spot.

You threw your head back, squeezing your thighs around Sam’s head. A sharp slap landed on your inner thigh, a gasp escaping your lips. “Look at me, fucking look at me as you become a stupid slut for me,” Sam ordered. You had no room to argue, your body a slave to the pleasure. Sam matched your energy, providing you with the rough dominant rough sex you craved. You forced yourself to maintain eye contact with him, your sinful moans bouncing off of the living room walls.

“Thats right, moan just like that. Let Emma and all of your neighbors know who this cunt belongs to,” Sam growled. His fingers were merciless, a third finger sliding into you. Your hands flew down to his hair, tugging at the roots as a knot began forming into your stomach. Your eyes were threatening to flutter shut, every ounce of energy you had dedicated to maintaining eye contact.

“Awe are you close already?” Sam smirked, your orgasm growing closer and closer. He spread open your folds, admiring your cunt. “Fuck, i’m going to fuck you so stupid,” He grumbled, reattaching his mouth to your clit. His strong hands forced your legs open, your thighs trembling as you came. Sam’s lips were relentless, sucking and swirling around your clit as you came on his face. As you rode out your high you threw your head back, your heart racing.

Sam couldn’t hide his ego as he emerged from between your legs. “On your knees, slut. Now,” He barked. You scrambled to meet his command, your knees hitting the wooden floor. “Open your mouth for me,” He snarled. The moment you did so his cum soaked fingers were shoved in your mouth, all three of them. You did the best you could to suck them clean, the taste of your own juices coating your tongue. You swirled your tongue around his fingers, teasing him.

“Thats a good girl,” Sam purred in satisfaction. He removed his fingers from your mouth, eagerly replacing them with his cock. Your mouth was heaven, Sam watching in amazement as you began taking him further without a second thought. He hadn’t even needed to tell you to. “You’re so fucking perfect,” Sam muttered, grabbing your hair. He ensured to make it into a nice ponytail, before forcing his cock to hit the back of your throat.

The sound of you gagging was pure ecstasy. Sam admired as saliva dripped down the sides of your mouth. Down to your chin. Then pooling onto the wooden floor in front of your knees. The blonde couldn’t think straight as his hips moved on their own, lost in his own personal euphoria as he face fucked you. You did your best to maintain eye contact with him, tears flooding your waterline. “You’re such a whore, fuck,” Sam groaned.

He briefly yanked you off of his cock, watching you gasp for gulps of air. Saliva dripped down his cock, tears officially spilling from your waterline. Sam’s cock twitched at the sight, your mouth reattaching itself to him. Mesmerized, Sam watched as you sucked his cock, your tongue swirling and wrapping around his tip. Sam whimpered as his own high came quickly, the blonde yanking you off of him. Your name was a mantra as he came, jerking his cock in front of you.

You flattened your tongue across your bottom lip, his ropes of cum painting your face. You swallowed what seed landed on your tongue, the rest of his cum staining his face. Sam guided you over to the couch. You stood eagerly, awaiting his instructions. “Cmere, come ride my thigh,” He said plainly. You planted yourself on his thigh, a whimper escaping your lips as your clit brushed against his bare skin. You went to wipe off your face, the blonde grabbing your wrist.

“No. Ride my thigh with my cum on your face. Show me that’s how much of a whore you are,” Sam ordered. You grabbed onto Sam’s thigh for support, steadying yourself before slowly rolling your hips downwards. You couldn’t hide your whimpers, your clit overstimulated. Sam watched in awe, your hips slowly grinding against him. “Go faster,” Sam commanded. He didn’t want to be easy on you, he wanted to see you squirm.

Your thighs shook as you attempted to follow his command, your cheeks turning a shade of bright red as the humiliation set in. You weren’t going fast enough for Sam, his large hands grabbing your waist. His fingers dug into your skin harshly, guiding you to ride his thigh faster. “Sam- Feels so good, I- fuck,” You slurred. Your hips struggled to keep up with Sam’s movements, your eyes fluttering shut as you felt your second orgasm coming.

Sam could feel himself growing hard again at the sight of you, blood rushing to his shaft as you pathetically did everything in your power to cum. “Cum for me, now,” Sam ordered. Unholy mantras of Sam’s name slipped from your lips, your thighs trembling as you came on his thigh. You felt dazed, your body trembling as Sam’s strong hands held you in place.

He lovingly brought his hand to your cheek, ignoring the cum that was gathering on his thumb. “You think you can handle me?” He asked gently. You mumbled an agreement, lifting your head to meet his eyes. You grabbed his wrist, redirecting his thumb into your mouth. You swirled your tongue around it, swallowing his cum. “Filthy filthy girl,” Sam muttered, guiding you into the next position.

You found yourself on the couch on all fours, ass in the air as Sam admired you. Your arch was divine, one he had seen before and had been yearning for all of this time. Teasingly he rubbed his tip up and down your slick, lubricating his cock for you. His eyes gleamed with pride as you squirmed at the slightest feeling of his tip brushing against your clit. One thing that Sam remembered, on top of everything else, was that you didn’t like to wait.

Aligning himself with your entrance, he quickly pushed himself inside. Sam would be fine with taking things slow, allowing your body to adjust to his cock. But you preferred to be slammed into, enjoying the pain that ever so slowly faded into pleasure. Sam let out a shaky groan as he bottomed out, euphoria clouding his senses.

Sam had traveled all over the world trying to forget about you, trying to seek paradise. One that would bring him to the state of blissful peace. But as his cock brushed against your g spot, the sweet sound of your whimpers flooding his ears, he came to a realization. Sam’s personal paradise was being buried into your cunt. Nothing else on the planet compared to the way you squeezed him, begged for him, kissed him, moaned for him. His paradise, overall, was you.

The blonde began moving his hips, your groans growing louder. Your walls clenched around him as Sam picked up the pace, he began panting curses with mixes of your name. “You feel so fucking tight, shit,” Sam groaned. He leaned over further, grabbing a handful of your hair as his cock abused your cervix. “You’re mine. My personal cock slut, understand?” He growled. He pushed your face into the couch, his cum staining the fabric below you.

“Y-yes sir,” You babbled, your body on cloud nine. Your thighs began to shake with every thrust, your body overstimulated and complete putty in Sam’s hands. Sam’s fast paced thrust were becoming greedy, the desire for him to reach his own high clouding his judgment. “Look at you, staining your couch with my cum all because I told you to. Such a pathetic whore for me,” Sam rambled, his hands digging into the sides of your waist.

You could feel your final orgasm approaching, your waterline flooded with tears as they dripped down your cheeks. “Sammy, gonna cum, please, don’t stop,” You pleaded. You tilted your head back, looking up at Sam as he pounded into you. His hand left your hair, slithering down to your throat. He squeezed the sides, restricting your airway. “Go on then, cum on my cock,” Sam muttered, thrust away from orgasming himself.

Your walls spasmed around his cock, your eyes fluttering shut as Sam fucked you through your orgasm. You were seeing stars, your final orgasm hitting you like a ton of bricks. Sam pulled out quickly, his ropes of cum painting your ass and lower back.

He felt euphoric, the paradise he had been seeking right in front of him, covered in his cum. Your body was spent, your heart pounding in your chest as you came down from your high. Sam scrambled to find something to clean you up with, deciding his shirt would have to suffice. He wiped his seed off of your ass, gently helping you roll over onto your back.

A faint smile creeped across your lips, your mascara smudged and running down your cheeks. “The cumming on my face thing was hot, we should do that again,” You admitted, allowing Sam to clean your face. He chuckled at your confession, admiring your fresh face.

“I figured you’d like it.”

With all of the energy you had left you lifted your head, bringing your lips to his. This kiss was different, the desperation gone. Replaced with a certain sweetness and passion Sam hadn’t felt in a long time. His hands cupped your face, deepening the kiss. The sound of his ringtone, halted him from continuing. He mumbled an apology, digging his phone out of his discarded jeans.

“Oh shit it’s Colby, hang on.” Sam informed you. He resumed his place beside you on the floor, your soft lips leaving pecks of kisses on his shoulder.

“Hey brother, what’s up?”

“You want to explain to me why you’re at my little sister’s dorm?”

Shit.

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 758: The senpai's few words

Pag 2

1: Aoyagi-san!!

Pag 3

1: Wha- what happened, Danchiku, you stopped so suddenly

2: Why is he here, in Kyushu!?

What is it, what is it

4: He's probably the person I'd want to see the most right now!!

5: What is it, is there someone in the audience area?

Someone you know? You look so surprised

I wouldn't be so surprised even if someone was there

Pag 4

2: He-hello!! You... you came to... cheer us on!?

3: It's been a while, Danchiku

4: Yes.... yes!!

Thank you so much for coming so far to see us!!

5: You got bigger

Pag 5

2: Thank you so much

3: Uhm, actually

There's something I'd like to talk to you about, is that....

4: Aoyagi-saaaan!!

-okay!?

Pag 6

1: What, for real!?

What, are you really here- amaaazing!!

Oi, Issa, I was....

2: Wait... did you just made Aoyagi-san lose consciousness with your tackle!?

3: Aoyagi-saaan!! Hahahaha!!

You're attacking him when he's already down...!!

4: I'm... o... okay...

No, he keeps pausing while talking!!

Hahaha

5: I'll lead you to our tent!! Carry him, Danchiku!!

'Carry him'....

Pag 7

2: Thank you

2: I wished you had told me you'd come though, Aoyagi!!

You forgot to add “san”, Kabuagi

3: There was something... I wanted to talk to you about but

4: I guess it can't be helped....

(You're ending up yielding again, Danchiku)

5: Ah right

6: Aoyagi-san is

Pag 8

1: A member of last year's team!!

He's the column who supported Sohoku from below last year!!

2: Someone who gained experience through hard work and difficulties and debuted in his third year, ran as a sprinter, pulled the team, and brought back the members so many times

3: Without talking, without refusing, he just did it silently!!

5: Even when he was in a pinch, when he was injured, he moved forward with all his might without ever standing out!!

If he hadn't been there, there's no way Sohoku could have won!!

Pag 9

1: He-he sounds amazing, teh

Right!! I'm really flashy, so his way of running is probably the exact opposite of mine

2: Hearing it again, he really is an amazing person.....

and I also know well what happened with his leg on the third day

4: If I was in the same position and got injured.... would I be able to run the same way?

5: “He'll run away right away”

“He's a chicken”

Pag 10

1: In this Inter High that is about to start

Pag 11

1: Since Aoyagi-san came to see us, I'll smash the starting dash!

There's no need to smash, run calmly

2: Should I get subbed out?

I'm still in time

4: “No one will blame you”

“I can be done in fifteen minutes”

5: I'm at my peak now!!

Save it for the race

6: You're an idiot as usual

I'll forgive everything you say, Aoyagi-san!!

7: What can I do, what......

Nothing....!!

Pag 12

1: The stage event is starting soon

Last year's champions, Sohoku High School, representative of Chiba, please come to the stage

Kakaka, it's our turn!!

2: Teh.... I'm nervous, the

There's gonna be tons of spectators!!

3: Do-do we take a video? I'll do it, Sugimoto-san

I'll leave it to you then. I'll finish up here

4: Su-

Sugimoto-san!!

6: Ao.... yagi-san.....

Pag 13

1: Could you do me one favor?

2: Ah- yes!

Do you want something to eat!! Right away!!

3: The food truck is there... is curry alright?

4: …. no

5: A band-aid!? A nail-clipper!?

Leave it to me, after all I worked a lot behind-the-scene last year

6: Oi, Danchiku, what are you doing. Let's go

8: Ye.... yes

Pag 14

1: Take care of that idiot

Pag 15

3: The Inter High is harsh and long

But he's reckless and can't read the air

5: You, on the other hand

6: You always keep an eye on your surroundings and pay attention to what people say and do

And that means

Pag 16

1: That you can make an accurate judgment of risk in any situation

3: The ability to read small details when you're in a pinch is essential in road racing

4: Earlier in the midst of more than a hundred people in the audience area, you

Pag 17

1: found me at one glance

4: I think you know this too, but he can only look ahead

Please support him, take a step back and, as always

5: be watchful

Pag 18

2: Yessir!! Thank you so much!!

4: “Take a step back”.....!! Taking a step back.... yielding, are my...

5: If this small heart is my ability

Pag 19

2: then I'll be the one running, Issa!!

Together with you!!

At full throttle!!

Pag 20

1: Run, Danchiku

Just like I did last year

2: with Junta

3: I'm sure your feelings will give you strength

These are the members of Sohoku, the Chiba prefecture representative who won the championship last year

Pag 21

1: So far they have won two times in a row

3: What's wrong.... your balloon... shall I get it for you?

Pag 22

2: Thank you, Onii-chan

3: That's surprising, Midosuji-san

You're so kind

4: Puku.... I am kind, though?

To

5: anyone who doesn't wear a number bib, that is!!

[peachcitt]

happy friday the 13th a flesh monster be upon ye

my never ending @ladrienjune continues with another chapter of greatest hits that you can read here

thanks for reading!!<3

[ohbo-ohno]

While the reasons for rape fantasies in women that was previously mentioned (https://www.tumblr.com/ohbo-ohno/736158893114359808/sorry-to-infodump-if-youve-heard-this-already) centers around, well, women, it also just screams Soap to me.

Soap who is queer and practicing a religion that shames his very existence. Soap who has a healthy(?) disrespect for authority who has been punished for acting out multiple times. Soap, who doesn't know anymore if he acts out because that's his opinion or because he knows he will be punished (secretly hopes for it, because it might make the shame go away, might make his co put his hands on him like that drill sergeant at basic who just went too far in his punishment, might make someone else touch him for once instead of himself always having to reach out to stop the touch starvation from settling in too deep).

Soap, who, after a lifetime of being pushed around or taken as the second option, just wants to finally be wanted, to be considered worth someones time. Wants to be the center of someones focus for once, even if just for a few minutes. As long as its not as the butt of a joke (which he is frequently, the most obvious target being his haircut, which is the only the body part of his he actually really likes) Just wants to know what it feels like to be chosen first. To be exactly what someone else wanted. Regardless of his consent.

His need for approval makes him into a good soldier but makes it so so easy to take advantage of him.

Enter Ghost.

it feels the ittiest bittiest ooc to me (so is all of my writing lmao) but i looooove the idea of soap constantly pushing ghost's boundaries because he wants his lt to snap and finally give him all of his attention. and ghost, who sees this and clocks it instantly, is not about to let johnny win this little game he thinks he wants to play

soap who is eager for pain when he's feeling especially bad or guilty, and sadistic asshole ghost who's more than willing to feed into his bad habits. a match made in heaven

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

yknow its a hard line to dance, but i do love when people make the stans a bit mean at times in fics/art (hard line to dance, because its pretty easy to stray into ‘sounds like author just hates these two’ territory unfortunately)

it seems to me that ford has trouble with communication. he often cant tell when something he says could be hurtful to someone

(i say that because you can tell he really does care about his family and he does to try to make things up to them- ie, comforting dipper after the bill thing, praising mabel and letting her write an entry in the journal after the unicorn thing, actually trying to find ways to mend his relationship with stan in spite of everything)

stan is the type of guy to scare children and laugh about it. there is an entire episode dedicated to this. he nonchalantly insults people, hes unapologetically cocky, and, maybe most interestingly, he also seems to have trouble telling when something he said might have been hurtful

hes kinder towards his family/friends (note: kinder, he is definitely still mean to them at times. see: boss mabel, the bottomless pit, etc.) but he really just does not care at all about upsetting strangers. he delights in making people angry, at least, the facade he puts on does. and of course, this isnt an insult towards him, it…actually kinda makes sense when you think about his past. not that it made him that way necessarily, more that it sort of emphasized those traits i think

in a similar vein, i think at least part of the reason ford has difficulty interacting with people could be because of his time spent in the multiverse. it seems he doesnt really like having to interact with strangers (excluding most anomalies). in fact, the only time you see him doing that (that i can recall) is when hes talking to the government agents. otherwise he just sort of…doesnt acknowledge their existence at all. the only exceptions are the members of the zodiac, and he gets time beforehand to know most of them

anyway- when you take those two people and put them on a boat together, you get a really interesting (platonic) dynamic! these two guys who are aggressively protective over each other and who will both absolutely deck a stranger in the face

imagine a scenario where stans insulting some random stranger and the person throws an insult back just to get knocked out by ford whos absolutely not going to tolerate it (except from stan, who gets the equivalent of a slap on the wrist)

or imagine a scenario where someone notices fords extra fingers and theyre overreacting about them and it gets to be stans turn to fistfight someone

its fun to think about, but hard to pull off. oftentimes you get ‘ford is definitely egocentric and thats it’ instead of ‘ford struggles with communication/general human interaction and especially hates interaction with people he doesnt know’

oftentimes instead of ‘stan is unapologetically mean to a lot of people (and theres a good possibility that being homeless and having to live with filbrick emphasized this)’ you get ‘stan can be mean but hes not as bad as ford and also it doesnt actually count as being mean if its directed at ford’

and, of course, this isnt to say you have to change the way you write them, this is simply me saying i like seeing these two parts of them interacting with each other. and it ended up much longer than intended

if youre like me and youre afraid of depicting them as mean in any way because other people scare you, you dont have to write them that way! you should write your fics for you first and foremost and if you dont want to write them that way, you are in no way obligated to!

anyway- theres a lot more i could say about this subject, but i think this is long enough

(just a small bonus bit to say that living with filbrick + all the bullying he had to go through definitely affected ford just as much as stan. and that neither of their traumas are more important than the other)

[ao3-shenanigans]

You've read the wingfeather saga and the fanfic??? Do you recommend any?

Woah! Another Wingfeather Saga fan!

There’s unfortunately very little fanfiction for Wingfeather (61 on AO3 and 77 on ff.net)

There’s one very specific fic that I read and really enjoyed but had lost it, so I went back through all 77 of them and thankfully managed to find it for you!

Being that it’s been almost five years since I’ve read the source material or the fic, I can’t vouch for its quality but I do know I enjoyed it back then!

There’s an 80% this was the first fanfic I ever read

The fic is:

Wings of Anniera by penspot on fanfiction.net

I remember being fond of chapter 3 in particular

[claudiajcregg]

1, 7, 14 💜💜💜

Thank you for asking, Ally! This might be Too Much, and it definitely sent me down a rabbit hole (even if I tried not to go too far into it). I've forgotten half the stuff I've written this year, is the tl;dr.

1. favorite fic you wrote this year

I don't know! I don't know if it's this weird slump I've been in lately, or just my default mood made worse, but I cannot choose any – none of them are my favorite! All of them are! I've written too much!

From the stuff I've posted – I definitely have a soft spot for press fic, for sure, but also memoir fic. I was blown away by the response to the ITSOTG missing scene, too.

Out of the unposted stuff… I started looking around and had forgotten how many I meant to either polish or finish to post, dammit. I cannot keep up. I'll say that I really do like the silly Jan 21st fic I am hoping to post in (you guessed it) January 21st, and another silly, sweet “short” oneshot I wrote that goes between IM and Tomorrow, and involves a present. And also, obviously, the s5 pregnancy AU. It's not the most realistic but I enjoy writing it. (Once again, begging the muse to return. Let's finish that bad boy.)

7. longest completed fic you wrote this year

The famous (?) S5 Pregnancy AU isn't complete, or even posted, so it doesn't count. So… my exchange fic is an overly long 16k oneshot. I want to write one of those director's cut/commentary things about it. I have so many things to say.

14. a fic you didn’t expect to write

Short answer: most of them! I think that, as it usually happens, my own writing begets more stories/writing.

But the true answer: two full explicit fics????? not just scenes in unposted fics (+ the ficlet, which I don't count) WHO AM I. The first one was a joke, a whole 'let me write something terrible and convince myself it isn't for me' and then my enablers liked it.

More end of year fic asks here!

[kitnita]

i started binge rewatching the glee project last night because my mom mentioned she wanted to rewatch actual glee and??? was VIOLENTLY reminded that my first ever foray into reading rpf was because i was obsessed w the Vibes of two contestants on the glee project of all things, when i was fully in middle school. horrifying rediscovery of the self. unfortunately my tweenage shipping lens still exists in my brain so the Vibes were still there upon rewatch. 

[selkiefinalist]

for director's cut: you promised not to write me an essay about nate's complicated relationship to his selkie heritage, but if I asked you to write me that essay??? If you aren't up for that, talk to me about your ej/sid ficlet because I, too, have thoughts and feelings and brainworms about two first overalls who went on two very different trajectories and also nathan mackinnon was there. -patrichornkissed

@patrichornkissed i do this for you even though you know i struggle to articulate things well. but if we are going to talk about nate’s complicated relationship to his selkie heritage (in that fic anyway), then i think we have to talk about it in terms of control, vulnerability, sameness, and tradition; and how sometimes nate wants all of those things, and sometimes he wants some of them, but most of them he doesn’t want to want at all. and at least a part of that fic is nate letting himself want.

control is a theme that’s so central to how i write nate, because this is a man who has built up so much lore about controlling his own destiny. changed his training! changed his diet! changed his therapist/therapy! he’s an outcome-based individual, and he can be pretty ruthless (in terms of his own soft-wants) when pursuing what i’ll call a hard-want. no euphemism intended. like, he will ignore the soft animal of his body if it means getting that big silver cup, you know. and the thing about being a selkie is that, at its mythological core, selkies are always in danger of giving up control of their lives. someone steals your skin and you can’t find it: game over. your life is no longer your own. of course in our modern era, that’s no longer such a threat - so instead i translated that into a physical need. he needs to change periodically in order to stay healthy; his biology requires that he face his selkie nature. he can’t cut it off entirely and continue to perform the way he wants to as a player. and he hates that, being betrayed by his own biology. i think you can see that in how he forces himself through the change, when he could let it happen more organically/naturally - he’s like, this is gonna hurt but let’s just get it over with, pain is temporary. and you know i love setting up that kind of life approach because it informs his choice to go all-in on ej even when he knows from the outset that it’s likely not going to turn out the way he wants it to.

that segues into vulnerability, i think, because nate has to change - and, even though the likelihood of someone stealing his skin and trapping him in that salt-scoured shack by the seashore or whatever is very small, it still exists. any time he’s changing, any time his skin is exposed. there’s risk. i played around with the ending scenes a bit in the original outlining, and one of the versions of the end that just didn’t fit anymore by the time i actually made it there was a scene where ej steals nate’s skin in CA, and nate lets him. like, it was implicit that ej would give it back if nate wanted him to, but nate was like, ‘keep it, it’s safe in your hands.’ not to mention the moments where he’s actually changing, naked and in so much pain on a dark beach. not an elegant moment, not the way you want your partner to see you when you’re trying to seem sexy and cool! but he gives that to ej from the very first beach scene - just hands himself over. and at that point, ej definitely doesn’t know what that gesture means - i don’t think nate does, fully, either - but i am here to tell you that gabe wasn’t gently draping blankets over nate or tucking his own hat over nate’s cold little ears, and nate definitely wouldn’t have let him. it might be fun to write that scene, actually (“fun,” lol, punch me in the face please) - from a previous season, gabe taking him out. just to see the differences! of course i told you this already, but that progression of car scenes and beach scenes, and having to painstakingly layer in growing intimacy until we get to that vancouver beach where nate’s like “you should watch me,” and ej finally does. tricky to execute but i do think i did okay with that. MY POINT IS, clear to me from the beginning that nate really wants that vulnerability - he literally gives ej shit about not looking at him in the first scene - even if he hates the implications of being vulnerable. he’s seeking it out from ej specifically because he trusts him not to use it against him. WAAH

sameness is really just in relation to hockey culture; nate’s not the only selkie in the league or the only two-natured, but the league enforces certain privacy standards not just to protect players but to keep that otherness from making any one player stand out too much. all nhl hockey players, at least to some degree, have to buy into that homogenous presentation. and for nate, the chips are already stacked a bit against him, because he’s not the same. more of an undercurrent in the fic but another complication - physically being a selkie can create issues with his play, socially it sets him apart from the team (his pod), and professionally could be seen as a liability from the league.

finally, tradition. on a side note, i’d say world-building in general is one thing i’m actually good at, and i was drafting (early draft) that trip back to cole harbour for christmas and realized i had done almost nothing to actually build out selkie culture. so i had to invent the chest and robe stuff really quick and then go back and insert that lore into other scenes. those symbols ended up working well, i think, but were certainly not part of the original outline.

okay, back to tradition. idk this is going to be a mess, but selkie tradition in this fic is very much draped in privacy, secrecy, and following the rules. how not? if a literal stranger can steal your entire life, you gotta be careful about things. but they live separately versus communally, and are pretty tight-lipped, even with each other. insulated, kind of. and i think like any young person, some traditions are more meaningful to nate and some just seem like a pain in the ass, especially when you know he’s not necessarily the biggest fan of his selkieness to begin with. but traditions also hold a lot of weight, at times. and so nate has to kind of negotiate for himself and within himself which he wants to keep, or at least acknowledge he’s not as detached as he thinks he is (that moment on New Year’s Day when he thinks ej’s about to hit him with a robe, for example). and you know, when he gets to see ej’s whole-hearted acceptance of him, sees ej start to engage in those traditions in his own way, he lets those traditions take a bit bigger foothold i think. also i just wanna cry a bit about baby nate carving little pine trees and stuff on his own chest, putting shells and pucks and dog collars and other important mementos in there :(((((( ok, sorry. if this is a fic about nate growing up, which at its core it really is, then part of it is that moment we all reach as adults where we get to choose what’s important to us or what parts of our histories we want to honor and what we want to let go of, and who gets to be part of that future.

i could go on and on and on and probably point out more things every time, like that meme with the guy and the pictures and the connecting lines but. here you go, fwiw <3

[damn-it-a-hogwarts-legacy-blog]

Tfw you’ve been on a roll writing a fic, then one of your favorite fics written by someone else from like, April, pops up in your feed again and you realize you’ve accidentally been plagiarizing it this whole time

[starbuck]

realized on my way home that two of my biggest and most ambitious fic concepts ever both essentially boiled down to “government believes they can fix a deadly rift in time and space by beating the shit out of this one guy” and i think that’s beautiful

[millenniumringg]

Redraw of somethin I did in 2020… I feel as though it is very relevant to my current interests

(See old art below cut :] )

[froggi-mushroom]

I’ve had this thought at the back of my mind for a little while but a conversation with a friend brought it to the forefront of my mind, I really don’t enjoy writing for the hetalia fandom that much anymore for a number of reasons that I will not get into but regardless, it’s put me at a crossroad where I could either continue as I am, which I don’t think is best for my mental health, or gradually step back from writing for this fandom (or abandon everything and start afresh, but I won’t do that because there’s a few loose ends I wanna tie up first)

I’m probably not gonna completely stop writing for hetalia because it’s still a creative outlet for me but my plan currently is to slowly but surely finish some of my current projects and WIPs that interest me and maybe a few particular ideas I’ve wanted to write for a while and to gradually move towards more original stuff

[fortune-maiden]

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Péi Míng & Shī Wúdù Characters: Shī Wúdù, Péi Míng (Tiān Guān Cì Fú), Líng Wén (Tiān Guān Cì Fú), Shī Qīngxuán Additional Tags: 5+1 Things, Slice of Life, Humor, or at least intended humor, Swords, Outsider Pov at one point, swd believes in action over communication, pei ming really wishes he didn't, some controlling behavior on swd's part but pm is having none of it, late peishui week fic

Summary:

If you're gonna live by the sword and die by the sword, you ought to at least have a good sword for it all, right? Shi Wudu won't let his best friend have anything less than the perfect blade by his side.

Unfortunately, Shi Wudu's stubbornness is matched only by Pei Ming's own.

-

Or, 5 times Shi Wudu attempted to gift Pei Ming a proper spiritual weapon!

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

one reason i'm grateful a) to have been getting into treating my meta as An Art Form as much as fanfic/art/etc, and b) that there's an import function for that on AO3, is that i write very little prose these days, and Actually Having Substantial Things to Post helps me get past the stumbling block of 'well there's nothing much worth going to the trouble for anyway, is there' to the 'alright let's address all the other baggage that makes using AO3 so emotionally fraught for you bud' step (staircase.)

[a-mere-shell]

i found all my old fanfics from 2009 when i was in junior high. and yeah, they were all cringey and bad, but i think i really learned a lot about who i was at the time, and it was introspective and good, mainly