#I just can't be normal I can't be like any other normal person because I'm certainly not one

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

To clarify,I don't believe in porn makes you evil and I don't believe in like fantasies are evil. I'm pulling this quote off Scarleteen "“If we aren’t both careful and creative we can get stuck in fantasies that don’t mature and politicize with us."" I'm also new to being about to vote, so I'm trying to be careful about what I consume and what stereotypes media perpetuate. Like I'm not moralizing about kink or anything, and my ask was how can I get aroused with media wo my kinks or wo media

hi anon, welcome back! I'm genuinely very glad to hear some follow up.

for anybody who doesn't stay vigorously up to date with all of my anons, this ask is a continuation of this one.

so I went and checked out the Scarleteen articles you mentioned in your first message, or at least I tried to. How to Approach Sexual Fantasies and Desire on Your Own Terms is here, and while I couldn't find anything with the exact title 50 Shades of Abuse, we do have 50 Shades of BS - How to Tell the Difference Between Kink and Abuse as well as 50 Shades Crappier: On Selling Abuse for Valentine's Day, both of which cover how the 50 Shades series isn't a great model of real, responsibly-practiced BDSM.

now, here's what I didn't see in any of these articles: an assertion that anybody needs to, as you've decided to do, avoid any work that depicts anything less than perfectly healthy sexual practices.

the closest we get to that is the quote by adrienne maree brown from How to Approach Sexual Fantasies, which you mention above. now, here's the thing: first of all, I actually disagree pretty substantially with brown's assertions that one's sexual fantasies need to "politicize." I know what my politics are; the fiction that I enjoy can't change that, because I don't have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair. I actually just talked about that earlier today in another ask.

(also, and this may be an unpopular opinion, but adrienne maree brown is kind of a dork who doesn't really say much of anything in Pleasure Activism that Audre Lorde didn't already say better and more succinctly, and I personally lost interest in Pleasure Activism pretty much the moment she casually dropped that she practices reiki healing because that's a pseudoscientific alternative medicine that doesn't do shit or fuck. but I digress.)

listen, I'm not trying to peer pressure or bully you into watching anything you don't want to watch. your porn consumption is up to you. but what you're doing here is absolutely moralizing, I think maybe because of an underlying assumption that media that involves sex is just, like, innately different than any other type of media, which is in itself an idea that stems from sex negativity!

I don't know, let's just try to play out a little thought exercise here. like, would you consider it reasonable if somebody told you that they've decided not to read or watch anything that depicts problematic behavior because they don't want to normalize it. like, first of all, they're never watching anything but Bluey again. except actually not even Bluey because I just remembered about Bluey in the genocide, which actually makes for a great illustration of how nonsensical and impossible it is to try to only engage with media that is 100% ideologically pure.

and again: that's fine! that's literally fine! it is 100% okay to watch or read or play things with morals that don't totally 100% align with yours. it's okay to enjoy them, even. it's a lot healthier than trying to avoid upsetting or incongruous things entirely, because that gives you the chance to actually think about it rather than trying to shut it out entirely! that article actually provides an entire list of questions you can run through with yourself to critically analyze the things you watch if you feel so inclined! that's a much better skill to practice than avoidance!

I get that when you're new to sex, as you said in the previous ask, this might seem daunting, but your brain isn't just a sponge that will uncritically soak up and adopt anything you expose it to. you very clearly have the ability to research, differentiate between fiction and real life, and form your own opinions! and it is absolutely fine if you want to just watch porn with your kinks!

like, listen, I see what the question is, and the easiest answer is just. do whatever gets you off.

[bigfatbimbo]

Hey there! @hazbinhotelmollykisser here yet again, with the promised bill rambles :)

Forgive me if the following words sound like nonsense, I'm trying lol

SO. I'll be covering the bill with a more powerful reader and sub bill because your works have changed my brain chemistry, masochist bill because I'M GOING INSANE AN I NEED TO BE SEDATED, and bill with a reader that likes to tease him (with a more powerful reader version and a just a human version) because I need to study his reactions to teasing like I'm Stanford studying like... Science + math = triangles or something.

・Bill x More powerful reader

So I actually made an entire oc for this literally as soon as I finished reading the og post, which I will refrain on ranting abt, but the idea of a reader that's more powerful than bill is fascinating to me.

Because like, he's bill so he's obviously gonna try to get under your skin, but imagine a reader that sees his attempts to annoy them and just... Like laughs? A reader that finds his attempts almost endearing? Reverting whatever bill did back to before with just a snap and maybe a passing comment about his mischief.

It would drive him mad I think, he'd be rlly annoyed and pissy about it.

Or alternatively, a reader that does get angry when he tries to annoy them, (a loud and aggressive angry or a quiet festering angry both yielding different reactions from bill) and Bill takes it as motivation to keep annoying you (and it's definitely only because he thinks it's funny and totally definitely no other reason).

(Holy shit this is already getting long)

・Sub!Bill

So obviously a brat right? Like very obviously? We all agree on that.

And this next bit will probably just be regurgitating your points because I can't stop having the same opinions as you,

I personally need to see any + every version of bill cipher getting taken down a peg. Like I need to just. Ruin his life a little. Like I need to cause him mental peril and make it up to him (but actually it's only for me) by making him beg for what he wants and not giving him anything unless he asks out loud because "well I'm not a mind reader" (more powerful reader probably IS but shhhh..)

I want him to cry and beg (as do most people who read your blog honestly)

・masochist bill

Thinking about the way that bill literally talks about going out of his way to inflict pain onto the bodies he "possesses" (? Idk if that's the word I should use) made me think. Like too much thinking too many thoughts, to the point that I at multiple points almost wrote a small drabble in my notes app about it. (I would've if I could think of any words to write down when I need them 😭)

But like he's definitely some kind masochist right?

I can't think of any scenarios for human reader he made a deal with and bill for this category but imagine with me pls, a HUMAN reader, that he made a deal with (is actively trying to manipulate), causing him PAIN somehow (directly or indirectly), and he... DOSENT MIND? because 1. He's gonna have a mental breakdown because of it probably, and 2. He dosent JUST not mind. It's like EXCITING but not normal exciting.

So basically he'd be freaking out.

And with a reader that's more powerful than him? I think it'd be clear as day. Going hand in hand with the angry reader that's more powerful than him thing above, he would absolutely get off on annoying them until they snap at him (specifically the snap at him part). And when reader notices, they're obviously gonna make fun of him because hes being pathetic lol.

I think I have run out of masochist bill words now so onto the next topic.

・tease reader (human) x bill

My main reason for bringing this up is I love the idea of the powerful bill cipher being.. Well, flustered.

Like maybe when it's triangle form bill its easier to hide for him but if it were human bill reader would be able to tell almost instantly probably.

And more opportunities to make fun of bill for being a pathetic little creature are always good :)

・tease reader (more powerful) x bill

OOWOWHEOEJEIEBSJBSISNDH I love this idea so so SO SO SOSOSOSO MUCH!!!3&:28&:9.

SO MANY MORE OPPORTUNITIES TO TEASE AND NOT GET KILLED :)

Like imagine with me, your teasing bill and he gets all "upset" and probably threatens you, you don't gotta back off, you infact can tease him even more for thinking that he can threaten you. Shheheheheheheh.

I think that's all my words, I seem to have run out.

I hope that big lump of nothing text (800-ish words 😰) was enough to make up for my sudden dissapearence after promising to talk about bill TWO WEEKS AGO

Forgive my probably dogshit spelling and grammar pls

and hope you have a good day/night/whatever!

IUAHAHSHSHSHSHHSHDHSHAHS I LOVE THINGS LIKE THIS IN MY INBOX!!!!! Because it’s like wow, you did all the work for me! 😊

Ugh, this is so good tho. I always love to hear your thoughts, you are one of my FAV anons!!!!!

[wade-fucking-wilson]

Just finished Deadpool and Wolverine WW3

So much to go over, so I thought I might try to convince you all to read it while I’m rabidly fixating.

For a Deadpool and Wolverine comic, I think this one is arguably the most intense, riveting, brutal, heartbreaking, and gay of them all.

SPOILER WARNING!!! I can't promise minimal spoilers since I'm going in-depth, so be warned that this is spoiler territory.

During this comic, Logan is almost drawn towards Wade. For a man who supposedly hates Wade's guts, he's more than willing to travel to Russia when Wade summons him. Once there, he finds Wade has been turned into a bloodthirsty cyborg for the entertainment of the rich. As someone who's been experimented on himself, he naturally feels sympathy for what Wade has become and sticks around to help him.

After being dropped in the Russian wilderness together, Wade finally begins to snap out of his brainwashed state. He asks why Logan came to save him, to which Logan replies that he asked him to come. Wade apologizes for bringing him all this way and says that Wade was frightened when he summoned Logan. The question is, why Logan? Why did he call Logan when he was scared, and why would Logan come if he supposedly hated Wade?

Anyways, as the two walk through the Russian wilderness, Wade begins to physically/mentally weaken. So, of course, Logan does what any normal person would do; he cuts out a chunk of his leg for Wade to eat!! Cannibalism as a metaphor for love, anyone? He cares enough about Wade to feed himself to Wade, how fucking nuts is that?? Guys, friends don't do that for one another.

Later on, during an intense fight with some enemies (and a huge monster), Wade "dies." Logan genuinely mourns Wade. Once again, this is coming from the guy who supposedly hated Wade's guts at the beginning of the comic. I would say he mourns because his travel partner just died, but we all know it's more than that.

As he mourns (and fights for his life), Logan becomes aware that Wade has literally begun to regenerate on/in him and is connected to his back (Best I just show you the frame for this one)

(Kinda nasty; I'm sorry)

Weird Blob Wade explains that their blood mingling resulted in Wade regenerating while connected to Logan's body (possibly leeching off Logan’s energy??)

There's a few pages where they share a brain and body, which is INSANE. Like, I don't know if it can get much gayer than that. Truly. They have shared their bodies with one another (in a non-sexual way this time around), which I feel is more intimate than sex would have been in this situation.

The comic ends with Wade fully regenerating and the two going on a killing spree (classic), but not before Wade says this:

("When you say "@*** off" it sounds like "I Love You")

In summary:

Cannibalism is a metaphor for love

These two literally sharing their bodies with one another

The unrefuted fact that Wade and Logan are DRAWN TO EACH OTHER.

This comic is batshit insane, and I highly recommend it.

[welcometothejianghu]

Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 彩香ちゃんは弘子先輩に恋してる / Ayaka-chan wa Hiroko-senpai ni Koishiteru / Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko!

Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko! is a 2024 eight-episode Japanese comedy of errors about what happens when two adorable lesbians continually get in the way of their own relationship.

I think the poster gives a somewhat wrong impression: Hiroko (in black) is not a straight girl horrified that she is being hugged by a lesbian; she is a lesbian horrified that she is being hugged by her crush, whom she perceives to be an oblivious straight girl. But as the title of the show would suggest, Ayaka (in pink) is very much not a straight girl, and is instead a determined young woman with sapphic designs on the hot older woman at her job.

And they are both so, so stupid about it.

The whole wacky, wonderful series will take up a mere three hours and twelve minutes of your life, so here, as was the case with Otoko Meshi, is a correspondingly quick list of five reasons to watch it.

1. Clueless Lesbian 4 Clueless Lesbian

Have you ever seen someone have a crush and proceed to be normal about it? Well, you won't find that here. Ayaka is going to con this beautiful, competent woman into topping her if she has to kill everyone in this office to do it.

Hiroko refuses to believe that Ayaka might actually mean what she's saying, choosing instead to believe that Ayaka's actions are pure platonic displays of admiration, even when Ayaka outright says what she's after. Meanwhile, Ayaka simply cannot imagine why her very targeted overtures are always being rebuffed, interpreting Hiroko's continued resistance as a sign that Ayaka is simply not doing a good enough job of seducing her. She's got to up her game, dammit!

If you like the type of business where it takes multiple dates for two women to figure out they are in fact girlfriends, this is for you. Every oblivious lesbian trope in the book is on display here. It's a war of attrition between a woman who feels obligated to say no because she doesn't believe the person asking understands what she's asking for, and a woman who won't take "no" for an answer because she's certain that as soon as she figures out how to ask the question correctly, the answer will be "yes."

And will it be? Well, of course it will, because you know how this genre works. But not before some adorable wlw wackiness ensues!

2. Harold, they're (actually) lesbians

Often in both BL and GL properties, characters are presented as mostly straight with only plot-related same-sex leanings, usually having moments of going, I can't believe I'm falling for a wo|man!

The main lady-loving characters in this show have no trouble believing they're falling for women, because one's been out to herself as a lesbian since she was in middle school, one's just coming to terms with her desire for women but has acknowledged that it probably indicates she's a lesbian, and one honestly just never stopped to consider that being a woman desperately in love with another woman is pretty gosh darn lesbian behavior.

And I like that, you know? As much as I love a good Gay For You plot, I appreciate one that acknowledges that there's a whole very real community out there of people who feel the same way! You are not the only girl in the world who wants to kiss other girls! Lesbians have their own networks, hangouts, stereotypes, relationships, and even aesthetics that are distinctly lesbian. You can find them in real life, and I like it when you can find them in fiction too.

These aren't just straight relationships with incidentally matching genitals. There aren't even any strict butch/femme dynamics or demands that lesbianism equal gender-nonconformity. Sure, Hiroko is slightly more toward the masculine side of the gender slider than most of the other women in the show, but she's definitely not outright masc. While she's real into Ayaka's girly looks, as we see from flashbacks, Hiroko's not what you'd call picky about the gender presentation of her female partners.

They even go to a lesbian bar! The world's tiniest, most brightly lit lesbian bar! A magical place where you can always meet a beautiful red-clad femme, a cute little tomboy, and...

3. That hot bartender

It's like a good fairy granted a lion one wish, and the lion said it wanted to be turned into a beautiful Japanese lesbian, and the good fairy was like, wow, that's such a good wish, I'm going to make sure it turns out really great for you.

We are all the big-titty lesbian in red here.

4. Ayaka's outfits!

A major conceit of the show is that Ayaka, in response to her crush on Hiroko, has given herself a complete makeover, choosing outfits and hairstyles that (accurately) reflect Hiroko's tastes.

Even if you don't like her outfits -- and let's be real, some of them are a bit much for me -- they're still very cute and a lot of fun to see worn.

I do want to note that this isn't just a story about Girl Changes Entire Personality For Boy Girl She Likes. Ayaka's pre-transformation self is severe and almost robotic, and ... well, it doesn't seem to make her particularly happy to be like that. It seems less like her older persona is her "real" personality, and more like it's one that she'd just settled on because she'd been told it's what being an adult means.

There, that's what she used to dress like.

When she decides to change her style, she initially steers way too hard in the other direction, to the point where it feels like she went home and binge-watched fifty romcoms to learn how to be a person. (I'm just saying, if you wanted, you could choose to read Ayaka as an interesting flavor of autistic.) Over the course of the show, though, she gently settles into her new mode, which winds up suiting her so much better! So it's less about the nerdy girl having to leave her nerdy self behind to earn the attention of her crush, and more about how having a crush gives a girl the incentive to stop dressing the same way her parents dressed her in the second grade.

Also very cute: Some elements of her wardrobe get reused! She doesn't just magically wear several whole new things every episode! We see her apartment, and it's not large. She doesn't have room for a million different complete outfits, so she has to mix and match.

So yeah, if you, like Hiroko, like to see a cute girl wearing cute things, this show has just what the lesbian doctor ordered. (It's me, I'm the lesbian doctor.) (No, seriously, I am.)

5. A weirdly thoughtful take on the complexities of queer workplace relationships!

The show knows it can't keep up the absolute lesbian obliviousness the whole time, so feelings start to become clear about halfway through -- at which point the conflict that fuels the drama stops being about mistakenly thinking people are straight, and becomes more about why a lesbian office romance might not be the smartest career move for either of them.

After all, by the time you're in your mid-thirties and you've been working in the same place for over a decade, you're pretty well-established in your position -- but not so much that your job is completely safe from gossip or disapproving looks from your higher-ups. Meanwhile, when you're in your early twenties and just getting started, it won't do you any good to have everyone suspecting any future success is just a result of your sleeping with the (girl)boss.

So the goofy lesbian misunderstandings are fun and funny, but their worries about how dating will affect their jobs are real.

You find out eventually why Hiroko is particularly touchy about workplace relationships, and it's a very good reason! But at the same time the show explains this very good reason, it also points out that Japanese culture is slowly becoming more accepting of out gay people. Ten years can make a pretty big difference! Older generations might still be regressive about open queerness, but there's growing support from the youth.

Like these supportive coworkers! Aren't they precious?

I will admit, I am not the biggest fan of boss/underling romance dynamics. However, that never bothered me in this series, because Hiroko never feels quite like Ayaka's boss. She's Ayaka's sempai, sure, but she feels more like a senior colleague than an actual supervisor -- and Ayaka is 100% the one pursuing her, not the other way around. Still, if the idea of any hierarchy-crossing workplace relationship is an absolute dealbreaker for you ... well, you probably stopped reading this rec several paragraphs ago, so I'm not going to worry about it!

Anyway, don't get me wrong and assume this is something deep and serious about how perceptions of queerness can hinder professional success, because it's not. It's a goofy little comedy with cute outfits and dumb lesbians. But it's also a goofy little comedy that also occasionally makes some smart observations, and I like that about it.

bonus: Of course there's an adorable manga!

And you can read it here! It's a bit wackier and it makes some choices that wouldn't have worked in a live-action drama, but they're quite entertaining on the page. Here's the MangaDex summary:

Soft and bubbly office lady Ayaka is madly in love with her senior at work, Hiroko! Two lovestruck coworkers who both think the other is straight totally crush on each other… popular Twitter artist Sal Jiang’s latest office rom-com!

If anything, it handles Ayaka's transformation better than the show does, because it makes clearer that even after the makeover, she's still as intense and tough to crack as she was before -- around everyone but Hiroko. It even says in so many words that sometimes Ayaka's smiling demeanor is just masking.

The manga also knows a lot better what their job actually is, while the drama is more along the lines of, we work in an office! we do events! we have meetings! we create things for clients! It's basically the same Generic Company, LLC that every character in a modern AU fanfic does endless paperwork at.

Beside that, the series is a pretty darn faithful adaptation of the manga! Three volumes and eight episodes seem to be enough to carry about the same amount of story.

Want to watch the cute lesbians?

Sure you do! And the most reliable place to get them appears to be GagaOOLala, though I've found the whole series uploaded by various people on Dailymotion (here's episode 1 from one account, though you can find others).

It's a laugh-out-loud romp smart enough to know to get in there, tell a cute little bite of a story, and get out before the joke gets old. If you believe in the truth and goodness of lesbian love, treat yourself with this cheerful little romance that's only a slight exaggeration of how oblivious real-life lesbians can be.

Attagirl.

[please-let-this-work-oh-my-god]

One thing I find very interesting, as a learner of German, is Isolde's usage of du when speaking to Kakania. In German, there are three main second person pronouns: du, ihr and Sie. The first two are mainly used in informal and casual settings or when talking to people you're close with (with du being singular and ihr being plural sorta similar to english's y'all) while Sie is used in more formal situations (or situations which require some form of formality) such as talking to strangers, customer service or when you're talking to a doctor/patient. Kakania abides by this and uses Sie when talking to Isolde (such as in her speech at the end of chapter 6) but interestingly, Isolde doesn't reciprocate this and instead uses du when conversing with Kakania in German.

This is super fascinating to me because it implies different levels of closeness within their relationship. Isolde's usage of du implies a level of closeness and intimacy to Kakania as Isolde herself saw Kakania as a close friend (most likely due to the fact that Kakania was once of the few people in Vienna who actually sympathized with her and saw her as a human being) but Kakania's siezen suggests a certain level of estrangement or distance between her and Isolde. Of course. this could just be her maintaining her professionalism as doctors normally use Sie when talking to patients but with how things turned out after chapters 6 and 7, I'd like to think this goes deeper than just formality standards.

[rotisseries]

everyone debates about elmike like oh they're the best of friends no they would never hang out on their own they don't even know each other, when the true answer, much like everything else about them, is that there is so so much and also nothing at all

[arttsuka]

.

[goldenpinof]

.

[trlvsn]

studying psychology literally does nothing for your understanding of yourself btw. you just end up with better knowledge of excel

[thethingything]

so apparently the side effects from the metronidazole got to us so much that now I get to have recurring nightmares about it.

some of the side effects we had happened to match up with the symptoms of the start of a much worse reaction you can have to those meds, and luckily it didn't end up being that, but we spent a few days absolutely terrified by the possibility of it, and clearly that was enough because now we're having nightmares about getting that much worse reaction.

I guess we'll see if that calms down any time soon, but given everything that's happened over the last few months I get the feeling that once we've gotten stuff sorted and things calm down a bit and our brain starts processing everything we're gonna realise just how much all this has fucked us up and trying to process and deal with it all is gonna be exhausting

[depresseddepot]

I'm trying to find ways to slowly ease my way into taking walks (debilitating social anxiety) so I was going to download pokemon go again but my phone is too old :(

[eldrichfuck666]

I recently feel so strange about having a simblr, because I just.. I feel like I'm in a time loop, like time is non-existent thing for me and I just don't have any energy to catch up with the posts and how fast and how much is everything progressing and going. I just can't, and it's really difficult for me to force myself to catch up, I hate myself for it since I want and always wanted to be in this community, but it all feels so intense and strange for me, I just... I feel like I'm so far behind, like I need to stop being here because I'm too slow, too tired, too overwhelmed by everything maybe?.. I don't know what I'm really trying to say here, but like... I feel so out of touch or whatever.

[dredshirtroberts]

it is not slacking off to write or create it is not slacking off to do things that are fun i am not slacking off or procrastinating right now i'm allowed to do things i enjoy doing for fun including playing games and writing and such

[running-in-the-dark]

sooooo

I'm 32 now

when can I expect to finally grow out of getting obsessed with men people stuff? I'm waiting....

[navree]

"you can't put alicent in a mother's day asoiaf comp because she's not a good mother and that's okay :)" but you have no problem with cersei fucking lannister in it when half her affc chapters are just about how abysmally she fails as a mother to her children so i think you're just a cunt

[notmoreflippingelves]

I should not be allowed to watch Doctor Who because the ships that most interest me are: (a) the ships that the narrative discourages me from sexualizing (twelve/clara) (b) the ships that the narrative tells me I am not supposed to view romantically (ten/donna) and the (c) the ships that I am not supposed to perceive/consider at all because they exist only in my mind and are problematic in multiple ways. (not even going to mention it because I'm so ashamed).