#I just think celebrities and anyone with a platform has the responsibility to do SOMETHING

[jackinalex]

I remember listening to one of the livestreams ATL did at some point and Zack was talking about being involved with a company that was trying to create small environmental jobs for homeless people or just people who couldn’t find jobs. And all that the other guys just said was that that was awesome and then Rian made a joke that drinking a mimosa is a charity for the self. And I think about that sometimes. I think it was the OIAL video release livestream. Maybe they do donate to non-profits or charities and just don’t advertise it but it would be cool to see them individually get involved with something they are passionate about, like Zack with the beach cleanups and environmental stuff. Even now he’s been constantly posting about different ways to help Maui and I respect that. Jack did once raise some money for Lebanon but that really is the bare minimum, setting up a link for people to donate. I feel like he has plenty of time when he’s off tour so I would love to see him help out in a dog shelter or do something with kids because I think that is something he’s passionate about instead of just posting cute moments on instagram. I don’t know, create a space for kids who can’t afford it to learn music or something. It doesn’t have to be anything earth shattering but I feel like they could use their platform to bring attention to good causes more because they clearly care about them. I listen to this indie artist Novo Amor who is a lot less popular than ATL but he constantly does something to support things he cares about. He made an absolutely amazing music video for his song Birthplace bringing attention to plastics in the ocean that accumulate in Indonesia, he made a fund and a contest for young filmmakers to create their own music videos to his songs to highlight an issue in an area that they are from, like water pollution in Mexico. There is so much good that can be done when you have a platform and means to do so.

I can’t love this ask enough. This is exactly what I’m talking about! Zack is incredibly passionate about cleaning up the oceans and also about taking care of the fire victims in Hawaii, and he puts in the work! He’s done so much for those people and he’s not doing it for any reason other than because it’s the right thing to do! He also helped out with Dr. Phil’s son’s Kids Who Rock organization. Jack can certainly do better, too. And I’ve been pissed at Rian ever since he fostered that adorable dog during the pandemic and said he couldn’t adopt a shelter dog because he was gone too often, then turned around and BOUGHT a dog (one who runs $700-3,000 depending on the breeder and location, etc.). I love when the guys visit children’s hospitals and shit, but I really need to see more from Alex and Jack and Rian. Donating proceeds from a t-shirt to the Trevor Project once a year is kind, but it also puts the onus on the fans to buy shirts when they could put in much better work. I hope I’m making sense.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

QTA: Queer Teacher Alliance | New Student

Feel free to ignore this if you're not feeling up to writing, but homophobia feat. a 2 hour math test and homophobia feat. queer teacher alliance both literally had me in tears (god I need teachers like that) soooo.... possibly something else within that realm? Pretty please? Maybe there's a new kid (remy? idk i think he's the only character not accounted for aside from the orange side and thomas at this point) that's struggling? Homophobia shit happens again, Virgil has a panic attack, and Remy or whoever tries to help? Cept they're highschoolers and not very good at helping so they just kind of make it worse and now both of them are panicking and one of the teachers finds them. And I think you can figure out where it goes from here haha – anon

Read on Ao3 Masterlist

Warnings: homophobia, transphobia, panic attacks

Pairings: none!

Word Count: 3479

    You know, for once in his life, Virgil would really appreciate it if people just shut the fuck up about things they don't know. Seriously, whoever decided that it was every person with a platform's responsibility to use said platform to speak about something, even when the person doesn't know anything about whatever they're talking about, Virgil would like a word. Several words, in fact, many of them four letters, and then to acquaint their face with several different heavy objects. Repeatedly.

Point is, he's been forced to listen to some of his classmates discuss some celebrity's opinion of Harry Potter and J.K. Rowling for the past way-too-many minutes and he's about ready to rip his fucking ears off.

"I'm just saying, there has to be a way to—"

"There isn't! There literally isn't! She's come out and said publicly that she takes anyone who still engages with Harry Potter to mean that they secretly agree with her horrible transphobic views."

"But it's like he pointed out! Harry Potter is such big childhood nostalgia for so many people, what if it means something to them? I mean, obviously we don't endorse what the author's saying—"

"Did you not just listen to a fucking word I said?"

No, they didn't, they won't start to, and you need to shut the fuck up, Virgil thinks to himself as the other student sighs.

"Look, what about, you know, death to the author and all that?"

"I mean I'll kill that TERF without hesitating, yeah."

I don't think that's what death to the author means. I also think it's not actually called that.

"But like—are the books and movies really that bad?"

Nope. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, Virgil is not going to be here for this. He starts trying to put his stuff into his bag as subtly as he can, even hiding his pencil case under the table so he can ease the zipper open as quietly as possible. Pencil case, laptop, textbook, notebook, he's almost got everything in when suddenly he hears:

"Virgil! Virgil, come help me."

Absolutely the fuck not.

"Virgil," they call again even as he tries to shove his headphones in to surreptitiously indicate that he doesn't want to be talking about this right now, "Virgil! Hey, Virgil!"

"What?"

Fuck. Shouldn't have done that.

The first student sighs, leaning back in their chair. "Can you help me explain all the awful shit in Harry Potter?"

No, because I've got class in half an hour and there won't be enough time. "Uh—"

The other one snorts. "Look, I'm just saying that if you can't do it yourself, then maybe it's not really as bad as you're saying it is."

"Shut up, my inability to articulate doesn't make you right."

This is, in fact, an excellent point, and Virgil's going to use it to seamlessly segue his way out of this conversation, watch: "I, um, I—uh—"

See? Nailed it.

"Maybe Virgil's on my side," the other one says, "you don't know."

"I don't even know what you're talking about," Virgil says hastily, fighting every instinct to throw his backpack at their smug-ass face, "so—"

"What the fuck do you mean, don't know what we're talking about?"

No, no, no, not like that, abort, abort, abort—

The first student glares at him. "Have you been living under a rock or some shit? All the bullshit that J.K. Rowling keeps spewing about trans women not being real women and that they're dangerous and predatory, that stuff, do you really not know about that?"

"No, I do, but—"

"Then come on and help me convince this fucking idiot that her books are full of shit too!"

Virgil's hand tightens on the strap to his backpack and he starts edging toward the door. "I, um, I don't—I don't really have time for that, I need to go to class—"

"Period isn't over for another—" they glance at their phone— "twenty-seven minutes, dude, it's fine."

"I need to use the bathroom—"

"To do what," the other one snorts, "you have like, a mammoth shit you need to drop or something?"

"It's actually none of your business what I have to do in the bathroom," he spits, hunching protectively over himself.

"Whoa, man, easy." They raise their hands. "Calm down."

He takes a deep breath to try and calm himself before steeling his jaw. "Look, the internet is literally right at your fingertips. Google some shit or something."

"Yeah, 'cause people on the internet are so unbiased."

"Why don't—look," the first one says, "why don't you just give us one example, how about that?"

"Why are you so invested in me giving you an example?" Virgil asks in frustration, forgetting to get closer to the door—and his freedom. "Literally how am I involved in this conversation at all?"

"Because you're gay."

There's a faint ringing in his ears, he realizes after a moment. The entire room seems to slow down, moving in bullet time, and there's that whine in the back of his head almost like microphone feedback. His pulse thuds loudly in his ears, which is weird, because he was so sure he could only hear the whining but now he can hear this thud-thud, thud-thud, thud-thud. He can also hear some sort of really raspy thing, and there's a burning sensation near the base of his throat, which is strange, what could that be?

Oh, he realizes after their voices start to fade back in, I'm panicking.

Of course, realizing that he's panicking doesn't do anything other than slam every single big red button in his brain that says Hello! Time to have a Bad Time! In an instant his hands start sweating. His hoodie starts to itch. His chest keeps burning—that's what that was. His eyes widen and his mouth stops mouthing and he needs to go.

He barely even registers the run through the halls to get to the bathroom, doesn't even remember if there were people or if there are people currently in here or anything other than chucking his bag into the corner of the stall and slamming the door and huddling against the cold linoleum.

Stop it, he screams at himself, stop it, stop it, stop it!

He should be fine. None of this should be happening. He should be fine because nothing actually happened to him and he doesn't want to have to deal with the consequences of visibly having a panic attack in front of those two assholes and he doesn't want to deal with their stupid attempts at placating him afterwards.

Especially not their stupid attempts to placate him afterwards.

He can see it now, the way they'll stand in that weird and awkward way where they're trying to be sincere but they're high school kids so they only know how to do that weird handclasp thing that makes everything look like it's awkward picture day and they'll stumble their way over saying some stupid shit like we accept you the way you are and it's not a problem but something to be embraced or even just I see you, I hear you, I'm here for you, and he'll want to rip their fucking stupid vocal chords out before they can burble their way through some fucking platitude that doesn't mean shit and fuck this really isn't helping him stop panicking.

The door swings open.

"Uh, hey," the first student's voice rings out and Virgil curls up as tight as he can, "I, um, don't really know what happened, but you seem kinda upset, so I'm, uh, here to check on you?"

Go the fuck away. Go the fuck away right now and leave me the fuck alone.

"Look, I think we may have gotten off on the wrong foot," they say as they come closer, in fact, and do not leave, "I, uh, didn't mean to just volley you in like that."

A shadow lengthens under the stall door.

"We, uh, I mean, I just wanted to make sure that you knew I wasn't trying to be homophobic or anything. I just meant that—you know, you're, uh…you might have more of a stake in it than we did, so I thought it would be good to…get your side of things."

I'm not trans. I'm not trans. We're not—queer people aren't some fucking hive mind.

A very good point he would like to make out loud. Now if only his lungs would stop trying to flee through his esophagus.

"But, uh, are you—oh, you're in there." Two shoes appear under the stall door. "Can I come in?"

"No!" He sniffs and gasps. "Get out!"

"Are you—you're having a panic attack, right?"

"Get out," he yells again, voice cracking, "leave me alone!"

"I'm not gonna leave you alone if you're having a panic attack, dude, that's not what you're supposed to do."

What you're supposed to do is listen to the fucking person who's having the fucking panic attack in the first goddamn place so that you don't make it fucking worse, which is what you're fucking doing right fucking now!

But of course, his body won't fucking cooperate with him long enough to make all of those words come out of his mouth, and so he just screams again.

"Get out!"

"Okay, okay, you're upset—" yeah, no fucking shit, Sherlock— "so I'm gonna—I'm gonna go get someone for you, okay? Just stay right there."

Where in the fuck am I gonna go, asshole?

But actually, the tiny remaining rational part of him thinks as the shoes disappear and the door swings open and closed again, that might not be such a bad idea, to go somewhere else. Then he might not actually have to deal with the consequences right now and he can ride out the rest of this stupid panic attack in peace and not have to explain himself to whoever the fuck that asshole went to go get—

"No, he's in there, I swear."

Fuck, how are they back already?

The door swings open again and Virgil scrunches himself as small as he can go, huddled in the corner, as a set of footsteps moves along the length of the bathroom.

"Hello? Is someone in here?"

Mr. DeLuca.

Two different instincts war in Virgil's chest. On the one side, Mr. DeLuca has been nothing but patient with him whenever he's upset. He's been kind and gentle, Virgil dares to say, and he's not made a secret of the fact that he'll be on Virgil's side if shit goes down about queer people.

The other side, though, knows that Mr. DeLuca is fucking scary.

"I see a closed stall door," Mr. DeLuca says, his voice still quiet and soft, "so I'm going to guess that's where you are. I'm not going to get closer, I'm still over by the sinks."

Virgil sniffs and it rings in the empty bathroom.

"You've picked the perfect place," he continues, "I'm sure there's no shortage of tissues to blow your nose with."

Despite himself, he sobs out a laugh and after a moment he hears Mr. DeLuca chuckle too.

"Though I can't say the smell will be pleasant once you do, this is still a bathroom."

The part of Virgil that wants the soft and kind Mr. DeLuca is slowly winning the fight as his back and shoulders start to protest being curled up like this for so long. With a shaking hand, he reaches out and undoes the lock, letting the stall swing open.

"I see you've opened the door," Mr. DeLuca says, "is that permission to come over?"

"Y-yeah."

"Alright, thank you. I'm going to stand up and start walking over. If at any point you decide to change your mind, that's perfectly alright, just tell me." Footsteps and another shadow and a noise escapes Virgil's throat before he can stop it. "Was that to stop?"

"N-no."

"Alright, just checking."

He keeps coming, all the way over, and Virgil can't help but cower a little when his shadow blocks out the light. Still, he tries to peer up and see him as he comes around the edge of the door.

"I'm here now, let's—Virgil?"

At the obvious concern that suddenly floods his voice, Virgil can't hold back the sob.

"Oh, sweetie," Mr. DeLuca murmurs, crouching down and reaching for him, "what happened?"

Virgil just shakes his head and claps a hand over his mouth. Mr. DeLuca tuts.

"Don't muffle yourself, it's alright, there's no one else here. It's alright, cry it out if you need to, I won't go anywhere unless you want me to."

And fuck it, he's out again. He buries his face in his hands and hoodie sleeves and just starts bawling like a child. Mr. DeLuca's hand comes to rest gently on his shoulder, sliding around to rub circles into his back. It's so careful but it's clearly done on purpose to make him feel better and he takes it back, that kid wasn't an asshole because they did actually get someone who could help.

It just…takes a moment.

When Virgil's finally got a hold on himself and half a roll of tissue to blow his nose on, Mr. DeLuca smiles at him.

"Hello, sweetie," he says quietly, "do you want to tell me what happened?"

"Not really."

"Will you tell me anyway?"

Virgil sighs. "Some students—the one who got you, I'm guessing—"

"Remy?"

"Yeah, I guess, them and another student started talking about how awful J.K. Rowling is—" Mr. DeLuca makes a noise of agreement— "well, they were arguing, really, and then Remy—Remy asked me to weigh in and I tried to leave but they wouldn't let me and then they said—"

"What did they say," he prompts when Virgil chokes off, "what did they say, sweetie?"

"They said they were asking me 'cause I'm g-gay."

Mr. DeLuca's hand stills and Virgil flinches. He's quick to soothe it away, though: "Shh, sweetie, I'm sorry, I'm not mad at you."

"But this is stupid."

"What," he asks dryly, "having a response to your trauma when it gets triggered?"

"…yeah."

He chuckles. "I hate to break it to you, Virgil, but that's how it works, I'm afraid."

"That's stupid too."

"Yes, it is very stupid." He gives his shoulder a gentle shake. "Can I convince you to come up out of the bathroom? Not to deny you your space but I'm sure other students will soon want a chance to use it."

"Yeah."

"Come," Mr. DeLuca coaxes, helping him to his feet, "I think Mr. Prince has a free period now as well, can we have you go sit with him while I deal with this?"

"Y-you don't—" Mr. DeLuca raises an eyebrow and Virgil cows— "okay."

"Do you want to rinse your face off first?"

"Uh-huh."

He splashes cold water and scrubs at his face until everything's roughly the same amount of red. He pats himself dry with the shitty paper towels and runs his hoodie sleeve over his face to get the rest. Mr. DeLuca just waits patiently with his backpack until he's ready to go.

"Thanks."

"Of course. Come on, now, it's not far."

He decides to pay negative attention to the surrounding halls as Mr. DeLuca guides him around to Mr. Prince's classroom, only looking up when the door swings open and he hears the familiar sound of Mr. Prince humming to himself as he works.

"Janus! What a lovely surprise," Mr. Prince calls, "and—oh, you've brought someone with you."

"Mr. Prince." Virgil can't help but smile at the familiar sound of Mr. DeLuca being exasperated. "I have a favor to ask you."

"Oh?"

"Do you mind if Virgil spends the rest of the period with you?"

"Oh, is that who that is? Look up for me—oh," Mr. Prince murmurs, everything else vanishing as he takes in Virgil's still-swollen eyes, "hey, Virgil, yeah, you can stay, that's fine."

"…thanks."

Mr. Prince looks up at Mr. DeLuca and they exchange a nod like Mr. Prince is giving him permission to go off on some mission to—oh, wait, that's exactly what's happening. Mr. DeLuca pats his shoulder one more time before leaving through the door.

"Come sit," Mr. Prince encourages, gesturing towards any of the open tables, "do you want to talk about it, do you want me to distract you, or do you want to be left alone?"

"Uh—" Virgil glances at the table nearest him, currently spread with all manner of papers, "what's all that?"

"Oh, just stuff for the other class, you guys didn't need it." He waves dismissively at the scissors. "It's an exercise to help remember some of the quotes from the readings to use in your essays."

Virgil snorts. "Ah, yes, the quotes that are definitely words that we would normally use in academic papers."

"Exactly, see?" He perches on the edge of his desk and Virgil deliberately looks at the desk in front of him, sitting down and putting his chin on his crossed arms. "Are you okay? Do you need some water or something?"

"Nah."

There are a few minutes of quiet as Mr. Prince goes back to shuffling the papers around before he sighs and looks over. "Alright, I know I asked if you wanted to talk about it and you didn't say you did, but I'm nosy and I want to know what happened."

Virgil sighs. "J.K. Rowling happened."

Mr. Prince makes such an expression of disgust that he snorts again. "What the hell was a TERF doing in your free period?"

"Two students were watching someone explain that they still like Harry Potter but don't support her perspectives on things like…that," he says, "and then they, uh, argued about it."

Mr. Prince winces. "I'm hesitant to ask what happened next."

"No, you're not."

"No, I'm not."

"One of them basically volunteered me because I think they have the all-queer-people-think-alike thing, and I, uh, wasn't prepared for someone to just loudly declare my queerness, so…"

"Well, I was right, that sucks a whole lot and I'm sorry that happened." He nods toward the door. "I would guess that our fearless math teacher is on the warpath?"

"When isn't he on the warpath?"

"You make an excellent point."

Virgil lays his cheek against his arm. "Also, they started talking about 'death to the author,' and I don't—that's not what it's called, right?"

"No, it's 'death of the author.'" Mr. Prince glances over at him with a smile. "Do you remember what it means?"

"Yeah, it's when it doesn't matter what the author intended or didn't intend to put into the text, right? We prioritize reader interpretation instead of author intention?"

"That's exactly right, well done, Virgil."

Not now, gay panic, oh my fucking god, not now. But it's too late, he's already got a giddy smile forming on his face and Mr. Prince has seen it.

"Don't hide, you're allowed to be proud you're right." He laughs in surprise when Virgil buries his face in his arms. "You're never this shy in class, what's going on?"

"I've just had a panic attack!"

"Fair enough, fair enough," he chuckles and yeah, it's probably a better idea if Virgil just hides his face for a little longer.

Still, he can't resist the urge to peek out for too long, and he raises his head just enough to glimpse Mr. Prince working with the pieces of paper over the edge of his hoodie. Mr. Prince glances over at the slight rustle and waves.

"Hi, there."

"Hi."

"You feeling better?"

"A little."

"That's good. Do you feel up to helping me cut out some of these things?"

"Sure."

This is fine, he thinks as he actually gets to laugh a few more times and talk about the ridiculousness of some of the quotes, this is totally fine.

And to his surprise, it actually is.

(He thinks Remy was right about them getting off on the wrong foot, though. Maybe he'll go find him later and they can actually have a conversation. Not about Harry Potter, though.)

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl

[katebeckets]

usually i'm not really one to talk about this but i am in a weird space with all the personal loss happening and with all the ttpd stuff on my dash, i can't help but reflect on the very real but ambiguous grief i've been feeling the last year and i just need to write it down. because it goes beyond the loss of my concept of who she is, but also revealed some things about people in this fandom that made me just as sad (if not more, because i realized how prevalent these things were). also, since this was primarily a taylor swift blog for so long, i feel like this might be worth saying.

i am fully aware that i don't know her personally and i never knew her personally, but she has always acted like someone who really cares and, to some extent, built her brand on it. and it was one thing when i could give her the benefit of the doubt and just assume she was ignorant of a lot of things due to privilege/being out of touch with reality (still not great), but still trying. but a lot of what happened in the last year made it impossible to reasonably draw any other conclusion than that she is choosing to stay in her little bubble. (also, people knew i was a fan and would ask me how i felt about her essentially being the quintessential white feminist).

i'm not saying that it's a celebrity's job to be an activist and champion every human rights issue, but i think what's so painful for me is the fact that a lot of her behavior indicates that she doesn't feel any sort of responsibility to use her massive platform to talk about anything but things that directly affect her; everyone knows how incredibly influential she is, including her. that can feel like a burden since it's not something she asked for, but it's still true. so even things like choosing to announce ttpd at the grammys while overshadowing so many other artists and Annie Lennox's call for a ceasefire... like sure, she can do what she wants to do. but i guess what makes me sad is the progression from "maybe she doesn't know" to "there's no way she's unaware." I am a random person with virtually no influence in comparison, but there's still a feeling of responsibility that weighs on me.

and before anyone argues by saying "what about this person," of course this is not exclusive to her. this mainly is just coming from a feeling of loss because it's learning things about people I really love (not just her, but friends too) that you just can never unlearn (and it's exacerbated by the new album being so close).

i'm going to listen and i know i'm going to enjoy and be excited about and deeply care about the new music, but it's also weirdly heavy because it reminds me of how many things i miss about swiftie tumblr prior to last year.

[xxlovelynovaxx]

Liveblogging our mental breakdown /half-joking

okay but like also there's so much judgment for people who publicly react to cruelty and attempted harassment - we say attempted because we had to actively take multiple steps to make it cease, but were able to stop it for now - but yes, we do consider several different people coming onto a personal vent post, even one with a screenshot, on someone's personal blog, including one effectively block evading by using their main to respond AS a mod of the blocked blog, to tell us how actually we're the shitty harmful ones

and hypocrites for saying a phrase is not for everyone when they tried to REPLACE the phrase for us with phrases that actively aren't for us, where if they were actually just alternatives like they claim we'd have had no issues

and for calling their "love loses is a harmful phrase" statement harmful because don't we know they're allowed to be annoyed (but if they had just been annoyed instead of moralizing this would be a complete nonissue)

and that we're actually excluding all the poor lovequeer aros and not the ones being excluded by their sentiments INCLUDING "love wins without us" because in fact that even excludes those of us who love who have still been hurt by love

(but we're not actually allowed to respond to being fundamentally harmed by any kind of love itself in any way other than supporting love instead of supporting human rights to autonomy and legal protections and actually actionable shit that will protect both those who love and those who don't but apparently we have to be happy with "love wins without us" when love winning means us losing)

but actually one or maybe two loveless aros have been harmed by other loveless aros rejecting love in spaces literally meant to be without love (there are full community spaces and lovequeer spaces where other types of love are celebrated, but the "without love" spaces rejecting love in those spaces is somehow harmful to other people who don't love, because... it's upsetting to be excluded for something they don't do?

and that actually we're the bigots providing fuel to those who hate us while they keep saying "but actually we're okay because we defend love, love is still good, see we're worthy of being considered human because even those of us who don't love defend it!!" which is somehow NOT total hypocrisy?!

to be harassment

(what continued to find it's way onto our dash after they blocked us/from people who hadn't blocked us is not harassment because it didn't actually direct anything at us or to us, though. us being upset about that is just our feelings, not anything they did wrong, even if we feel their arguments themselves are still harmful

but like back to my original point

I have always and will always wear my heart on my sleeve. publicly blogging about this is what is healthiest for us personally, and even if it wasn't, it's not wrong to engage in unhealthy behaviors on our own blog, which however public a larger platform it may exist on is essentially our virtual bodymind. we're not so much as doing the virtual equivalent of violating noise statutes, because unlike in real life you can mute us with two clicks of a button

and people love to also attack people getting preemptively defensive like this but. this is part of a wider thing we've noticed that we're just now reminded that we wanna talk about, and also that preemptive defensiveness is quite literally a trauma response to our words being taken out of context, misread, maliciously misrepresented, and otherwise twisted and misused by bad faith actors

Like, making fun of a trauma response entirely contained within our personal blog and those who CHOOSE to reblog the parts of it they find meaningful to THEIR blogs, that can be gotten rid of with blocking and muting - that's not the progressive take you think it is, and it's something that may not occur now but HAS occurred to us before. We're saying it to anyone who has done it to us, or will do it to us in the future.

The "appeal to rationality", the "look I'm so calm and stopped talking about it after a minute because it doesn't affect me as strongly and I can walk away from it, I didn't get triggered so you should listen to me and not them" is quite literally one of the most basic building blocks of bigotry. Hysterical women, angry black women/violent black men, crazy and dangerous disabled people... it's a stereotype that's been used time and time again to silence marginalized people.

That's not to say that the most upset person is always right, either. It literally just means that being upset, breaking down, fixating, going on about something, not being able to just immediately calm down and walk away - none of those make someone LESS reliable on their oppression and trauma, nor do they mean you should not listen to them.

If any of the people that talked to us continue talking about this, that's their right too. What they're saying may be harmful or just logically wrong/lacking context/lacking nuance, and they may do other harmful things in the way they talk about it, but the talking about it itself is neutral and I don't wanna see anyone making fun of them for continuing to vent about it.

And yes, that includes if they continue to screenshot my posts even though I have them blocked, as long as they don't post my name or incite harassment on their platform. I may be posting on my personal blog, but it is still visible on the public internet. It's not private or password protected, and therefore not directly liking, reblogging, or commenting on my posts is neither block evasion nor interaction to me, even if I personally draw the line at looking at a blog that's blocked me

Now, should those posts drive their followers to harass us? Then they need to take steps to discourage that harassment. In my opinion as a blog with a larger platform that's a responsibility - one we've struggled to find balance with on the larger blogs dedicated to specific marginalized groups/movements we run. Does that responsibility extend to stopping making new posts about a person? Probably. What about taking down old posts? I'd say that depends. Blocking the people doing the harassment though? Absolutely, you do not let people doing active, ongoing harm have access to spaces meant to be safe spaces for marginalized and traumatized people. You do not tolerate their harm.

Anyway, all that to say, we're gonna continue being annoying (reclaimfully, even! /silly) because we're not the ones doing harm here. We're tagging all of this stuff as 'love loses' anyway, so people CAN filter. Hell, people can block and even add our username to their filtered content to avoid ever seeing us again. We encourage that if that's what helps you!

Love loses. 😘

[sttoru]

Girly idk how I wasn't following you still, tumblr isn't stupid, I'm sorry that you are feeling on the outskirts of the fandom as well. You are a wonderful person and writer, and I'm glad you’ve been growing as you have been. You deserve so much more love!! 💕

It does make me feel like there is something wrong with me or like in off putting when i see several big blogs talking to each other, boosting each other. But then I drop in, just say hi to be friendly, only to be ignored. When they are literally responding to various anons or other people.

It seems like they want to talk to everyone else but me. Which has me feeling like I'm in the wrong, I'm bothersome and unwanted in the fandom space. They don't have to talk to me, but my feelings are still gonna be hurt at being shunned by 90% of the blogs I try to interact with.

It does kill my motivation since I don't want to be seen as someone who just posts. I want to be seen as a friend and someone to talk to.

I understand that some people get along better than others. But damn so many people are having this problem it seems like. It's boiling down to popular blogs like other popular blogs, boost other popular blogs and they stay the main people in the fandom eyes whole everyone sits quietly in the side just wanting to be partly including

Feel free to rant right back if need be. Cause I get needing to get this shit off your chest, cause I sure as hell needed to

hiii feyyy !!! dwww, it’s all good :> thank u sm for ur nice words aaaaaaa u r as well, one of the writers on here that i respect 4 their hard work !

gonna vent a bit haha need to get some things off my chest too like u said;

i get ur first point!! it sucks rlly. especially when you are the first one reaching out (which takes a lot of courage, especially for someone socially awkward like me lol) and then it hurts DOUBLE because you get ignored. i get ittttt rlly. for me, i always try to reply ppl even if im a bit late because im either thinking of a proper response or am distracted or busy , but i never intentionally ignore anyone interacting with me. i know some ppl on here do bcs they don’t feel entitled to respond to comments or anons or whatev, which is like ? ok. but if it’s someone just being friendly and complimenting you / your work … it’s not hard to reply w a form of gratitude . some rlly think they’re celebrities on here and it needs to stop

and it’s understandable and totally valid to feel like you’re being shunned and unwanted by people you just want to befriend , only for them to ignore you / not interact with you but with everyone else :/ it sucks and ppl don’t seem to realise that it could hurt other’s feelings. i hope you know that you’re not unwanted tho! those people are just… idk, a bit weird (ofc im only talking abt people who INTENTIONALLY ignore others)

findjng a friend on tumblr with the same interest is like a chore. you either click instantly or you think you do, only for it to be fore 2 interactions max and then you go back to ignoring each other basically on dash

AND YOUR LAST POINTS!! so true. its that the more popular blogs just stick together and help each other out when ??? there are smaller blogs of writers / artists just sittng in the sidelines like ‘ok so what do i have to do to gain traction if the people with a bit of bigger platforms are totally ignoring me & my works’

it’s actually tiring. ofc, me having 3k followers — i am suuuuper grateful, not complaining much, but i also know how it feels. my notifications are super dry except for mainly likes, my dms are like a desert, inbox is 98% only of anons who drop requests and then leave without leaving anything else. no one to talk to, except for people who leave a comment every once in a while :/

like u may think bcs i have decent following i actually gain more interactions? not rlly. only likes & sometimes reblogs w tags. that’s all really, i don’t really have anyone on here who i consider a close online friend (as much as this sounds sad & cringy LMAOO) but its tiring to see everyone be so close to each other on dash while im on the side like ‘how nice it must be to get that much interaction’

& im sure there are people who r gonna say ‘just interact with them’ I DO and i either get left on read or they respond dryly / or i don’t get the same energy back. bcs sometimes im reluctant to reach out first because it always ends up w me taking the initiative & i end up looking desperate to get an interaction with a mutual LOL

anyways thinking abt this tumblr writing community makes my head ache bcs of all the things ive seen and experienced on here (also on my prev account which i had for 2 years)

[with-the-flickers-of-light]

Ok, so.

[deep breath]

Since this is a Taylor Swift fan blog (even if it's one with zero (0) followers), it feels important to address my thoughts on the Matty Healy situationship.

Warning, this is going to be a post critical of the relationship. I absolutely do not believe that being a fan means that I have to support all of Swift's decisions. Also, content warning for swearing, light discussion of exploitative/abusive pornography, anti-Semitism, racism, sexism, and just general shittiness.

If you want anything tagged or fact-checked, please let me know!

Before diving in, my general thoughts on celebrity relationships:

As a general rule, I don't believe in speculating about celebrities' relationships. I am only really looking into Healy now since the publicization of the Swift/Healy relationship seems to be quite intentional at this point. And while I don't believe in holding women to a higher standard than men, or in erasing their professional achievements to gossip about their personal lives, I also believe that we as consumers get to choose who we support. Professionals are entitled to privacy, yes, but "privacy" is not a free pass to ignore moral wrongs.

For me, my basic stance is that I understand "The Man", but that many of the behaviors discussed therein should not be appropriate for anyone, whether a man or not. So no, this isn't about me being a misogynist and overriding Swift's professional achievements with gossip about her love life. This is about me pointing out that no one is free from accountability -- whether or not the media holds you accountable, somebody will.

I do believe the rich and famous have at least some responsibility to do good in the world. You have privilege, you have a platform. Hell, the world could refuse to ever give you another cent and you'd probably remain better-off for the rest of your life than most people. And especially if you choose to cultivate parasocial relationships with your fans, you have to realize that making shitty choices will feel like personal betrayals to them. As a celebrity, you know that your public decisions will be held under scrutiny and that they will impact the general population, because you hold influence.

And finally, on the nature of romantic relationships: I identify as aromantic-asexual, so I will be the first to admit that I do not understand all the urges that go into dubiously intelligent relationships. Nonetheless, I hold that while attraction may be involuntary, a relationship is a choice. (There are, of course, cases of abuse where the "relationship" is really not a choice on one side, but based on all we've seen I do not think Swift/Healy is one of them.)

That said, we arrive at the issue of Healy.

Healy is not the kind of person I am interested in supporting, financially or otherwise. I'm not going to list off all his crap -- it's well-known enough to be on Wikipedia at this point. (Which I hear is in a bit of an editing war? Never a good sign, y'all.) This post is about my response, because you can find the facts elsewhere (and you've probably already read them elsewhere).

If he was middle-of-the-road questionable -- like, if all he did was eat raw meat -- it could be excused. Whatever, I'm not going to ever be a fan of that, but I'm also not going to give a damn aside from doing a double-take at the headline and then sighing.

The licking fingers and kissing fans thing... that's. A, uh. It's a choice. That's the point where I'm kind of like... what? But sure, I guess you could argue that it's a morally gray area, because it's weird, and dubiously consensual, but I dunno, fans could be into that or something? Definitely not something I'm into, but pending further investigation on the case, I could bring myself to just roll my eyes at another trashbag.

And then we get into his recent, shitty statements. "It was just a joke/ironic/satire" is a bullshit excuse and in the year 2023, we all know it. If you're a celebrity who has a PR team, I sure as hell know that you know it. I am willing to forgive misguided jokes if they were from a bygone era and the offender has since apologized for the harm they caused.

Hell, maybe I could bring myself to accept the "ironic Nazi salute"; sure, maybe he was trying to bring awareness to Trump/Kanye-gate by drawing that parallel. I could convince myself that he really was acting in good faith, because there is a maybe possibly potentially decent outcome he could've been angling at.

To be clear, I don't believe it. I think we all know to not do the Nazi salute, even in satire.

But even if I did, well.

I am not willing to forgive Healy "joking" about masturbating to exploitative pornography of black women in the year 2023, without even an apology (to the best of my knowledge). I'm not going to speculate on whether or not he really was joking, but whether it was a fact or a joke, it's fucking disgusting. Whether it's a stage personality, a joke, an ironic comment, or satire, if it's you causing harm, then it's shitty. At best, it's ignorant and reckless; at worst, it's... I don't even know what to say. And again, in the year 2023, it's not hard to tell what could be harmful in said "joke" about porn, so I don't put much stock in the "ignorant" column.

There is no possible good outcome from a "joke" like that, which means there is no possible positive spin for me to try to play. There is no reason to be that shitty.

The evidence is clear and simple, and it leads to the conclusion that supporting Healy is not something I can be at all interested in or tolerant of.

What about the good things he's said?

Well, let's keep this short and sweet: human decency is not a transaction. Good actions don't cancel out bad actions, except for when the good action is a fucking good apology that genuinely seeks to make reparations for the bad action.

Okay, but why should Swift take responsibility for that?

Straight up, whether or not Swift is a "feminist" is irrelevant to this conversation -- this is the standard I apply to people regardless of what beliefs they claim (although it would come with an extra helping of hypocrisy if you do want to claim to support women and POC). What's relevant is that she has chosen to publicly and positively associate herself with a known piece of shit. And being in a relationship with Healy is tacitly supporting his views. There is no way she -- a self-proclaimed "mastermind", a "calculated/smart businesswoman" -- doesn't know this.

There is no professional benefit to associating with Healy, either. The David O'Russell movie could be hand-waved with "it was a professional opportunity". Where the Crawdads Sing could be reasoned away as "separating art from artist". But her dating life is 100% a personal choice. The only benefit to dating Healy is dating Healy. There's no other opportunity here, just the chance to spend time with and tacitly support a dirtbag.

(I know that she knows that "they're nice to me" does not magically make a shitty man a good person. You know how I know that? Because that's what she said during Scooter-gate. So there are no excuses here.)

She is a grown woman fully capable of cognitively processing the consequences of publicly supporting Healy. I don't care what she says in "Don't Blame Me", I am blaming her, because it's her own damn choice. She is making the choice, consciously and with no other benefits, to publicly take the side of someone known for racist and sexist behaviors.

And that's something that we can absolutely hold her accountable for.

Because at this point, supporting Swift is also tacitly affirming Healy's problematic behavior.

So how does this situation resolve?

There are 3 parties in this situation: Swift, Healy, and the fanbase. At least one of us has to step up and do better.

Swift could wake up, realize just how bad this is, and do better.

Healy could have an epiphany where he realizes just how bad his actions have been, and make a concerted effort to do better and make reparations.

We as a fanbase could walk away, because we are unwilling to tolerate the bullshit.

At this point, it seems kind of unlikely that wither Swift or Healy are going to change for the better. That leaves it up to us.

And now for the tricky part: deciding what to do as a fan.

Blech. It's easy enough to come to the conclusion that Swift's recent behavior has been unpalatable. It's harder to figure out what to do about that.

As fans, I know that there are a lot of emotions involved. There's the parasocial relationship that you want to hang onto; there's the importance her music may have played for you personally; there's basic appreciation for the technical construction of her work. And I know there's definitely the undying hope that maybe this is all a misunderstanding and maybe she really is better than this.

Either way, to me, there are 3 steps to getting clean from supporting problematic artists:

Stop public support. There's a time for silence, and there's a time to fucking speak now. Stop wearing merchandise, or repurpose it. Don't keep running a stan account as if nothing has happened.

Stop active financial support. Don't put money into her. Don't buy albums, merchandise, or concert tickets.

Stop passive financial support. That's streaming on Spotify, things where you might not be paying, but she's still getting money.

And then the final step is severing emotional connections. Stop singing her music for fun; stop listening to already-purchased music. I don't include this in the 3-step process because in my opinion, it's not a prerequisite to cut out a problematic artist's art to stop supporting the problematic artist (unless that art is reflective of their shittiness). What you choose to do in private without any interaction with the artist is your own business. It impacts no one but you if you continue listening to your existing downloads of Swift's music.

With all that in mind, for now, I'm not deactivating this blog. I'm going to let my queue finish itself off. And then I'm probably going to write a few reflections on some of her more questionable lyrics, because I do think there are some... interesting things in there that deserve to be discussed.

When all's said and done, though, this blog is probably going to go into indefinite hiatus, because I'm not interested in running a hate-blog, nor am I willing to continue running a fan-blog.

So. Yeah. That's where I'm at.

[petefromarma]

You can (and should) laugh at me for this, but am I the only one who prefers that the band hasn't said anything about gaza because I'm lowkey terrified I wouldn't like what I hear if they did? Like I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Andy was part of a fundraiser for the palestinian children's relief fund because it was semi-solid evidence that the other guys felt similarly but it's still not concrete evidence, and if any of them had opinions more in line with Gabe's it would both break my heart and absolutely ruin the fandom for me, and I can't change how they feel so I would rather just not know, and I am absolutely aware that makes me a coward but I was also too cowardly to ask my immediate family what they thought for MONTHS even though I was 90% sure they would agree with me and I have not said a DAMN thing at work either because I really don't trust my coworkers. I KNOW its awful and cowardly, but if (just in case) their opinions are bad I just dont want to fucking hear them. (This is stupid and you dont have to publish it btw, I dont even know what im trying to accomplish here besides process a feeling I've been having this whole time and feel guilty about HAVING, let alone expressing.)

putting this under a read more bc it’s long

so let me preface this by saying that i am not under the impression that fob minus andy are active zionists or anything as they have not given me a reason to believe such a thing; that being said, i think that at this point, at their level of celebrity, that silence is complicity, to a degree. this can be said for anyone with a platform who has not spoken up, at this point. and imo pete’s silence plus him/his family still being close with biden is already not…great. he should have experienced far more backlash than he did from the fandom for attending that white house party; people let up on him because he deleted the post which as i’ve said before was the right thing to do but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he did go.

gabe rightfully got his ass handed to him and ik everyone has different levels of what they’ll tolerate, but to me the white house incident was pretty fucking bad and i was surprised no one came for pete even half as hard. i understand the bidens are his family friends or whatever but at this point it cannot be ignored that the man himself is a genocidaire. so.

anyway i understand your anxiety, i think it’s normal to be upset at the thought that the individuals responsible for something you’ve invested a large amount of your life in are not good people. regardless, and i hope this doesn’t sound harsh, but i would suggest trying to come to terms with the possibility that the other three maybe do not have the best or most correct opinions re palestine; i don’t think any of them, as i said, have actively horrific beliefs, but to me their passiveness (as well as pete’s continued involvement with the bidens) is itself a moral failing.

idk there’s a lot to be said on this topic re complicity and celebrities in general but that would be too much for me to get in to tonight. i think it’s also necessary to remember that this is far bigger than fob which is part of why i was saying i don’t understand why we’re not flooding their insta comments since most of foblr seems to be involved with pro palestinian initiatives to some degree. idk i suppose it can be argued that swifties are just “badly behaved” or whatever but like i said i see a good amount of them every day mentioning that she STILL hasn’t said anything and i feel like we could be doing the same not just with fob but with other bands in the scene like mcr.

anyway re also the stuff in your personal life; i think knowing how to phrase things to people who are not within the leftist sphere who have been propagandized to all of their lives is also an important part of activism and you don’t necessarily have to go full throttle all at once. if you need resources let me know and i’ll find you some

[carrieleblancart]

In response to your questions about the timelapse videos, here are my two cents. Engagement doesn’t usually give you anything on tumblr other than a bump of serotonin, but it can lead to commissions or sales if you provide an easy link and are chill about it. But people are touchy about the word “engagement.” They want to feel like a community or maybe a cultural salon, rather than part of an extractive media process.

Your most successful process videos are going to show a satisfying finished piece at the end and give people time to look at it and go “wow.” So for most art some editing will be necessary to get there in a short video.

Another thing I should bring up is that the music you used for that sketch video was pretty grating. If you’re going to use music, i’d suggest finding something more relaxing. Just because the video is sped up doesn’t mean the sound has to be frantic.

Your painting process is so interesting, and your art is great! People here love cats with all their hearts and mostly really enjoy art. I wish you all the best!

Hi anon, thank you so much for your input! I really appreciate it, and I'm still getting used to actually getting responses, after trying to get it noticed for 10+ years (this isn't my first tumblr blog).

There's a lot going on with trying to share my art in the current internet ecosystem, probably something a lot of artists are dealing with. I'll try my best to describe what's going on on my end.

I don't like the term engagement either. I am trying to share my art through four main platforms at this time: Instagram, Tiktok, YouTube, and of course our precious hellsite: Tumblr. So my use of the term is more from the vernacular being used on other platforms, with what seems to be a kind of agreed upon use by artists of "this is what we have to deal with, so might as well lean into it." Maybe I'm mis-interpreting that (not surprising).

So far, Instagram is where I get my art noticed the most and has lead to the most sales/commissions/financial support. I think this has to do with the cat community that has formed over there. Tumblr definitely has its cat lovers, but I think a lot of them are over on IG so that they can follow internet cat celebrities and the like (I'm one of them!). So things like engagement and trends will dictate how I share my art with at least algorithm-led platforms. Also all of the cat people and friends I've met at shows regularly have Instagrams, not that that's a reason to be on there.

I agree that I should add time of the video at the end to show the piece to give it time to be seen. This can be easily accomplished if I make sure to take a photo of the art and include it in the video. I haven't had the best record of doing this due to my own ADHD and the pace at which these sketch paintings are being made.

Most of these recent sketch paintings were made back in August during CatCon on the spot! It's a crazy thing to do and I haven't seen anyone else do something quite what I'm doing, which is I guess part of my marketing for conventions and shows. So, sometimes I forget to take a picture at the end, but I'm getting better at including it in my process. And yes I call them sketches because they're fairly quick (I aim for 30 minutes for a 6"x6") and I don't get to add all the details I would like to if time was available. (I'm currently working on a new 3"x3" fully detailed piece of a famous internet cat, I've spent an hour and a half on it, and it's not done yet!)

Part of the timelapse question is not just to see what people prefer to determine how much time I should put into editing, but also how much effort I should put into digital storage. I have a couple different ways of recording footage, and the main way I've been doing so is with my iPhone. And so when I'm at events that I fly to, like CatCon, sometimes I'm having to transfer videos from my phone to an SD card until I can get home and get the footage onto a larger storage device. This can be tricky especially if I don't make sure to clear my phone storage before going to an event (something I'm adding to my list!) However, if I use the timelapse feature already available on the iPhone, then that makes editing and storage even easier for me later. I used this a lot with my Black Cat October series. But this timelapse footage doesn't look as good (maybe) and I don't have the option to do other edits later. Which then comes to the question for myself, am I really going to go back and make another edit for these sketch paintings? Perhaps the answer is timelapses for sketches, and full videos for fully detailed paintings.

And thank you for your input on the music part! The reason for the music in the last video was because of what's trending right now. Sometimes IG will save a copy of the video I posted with whatever music, so I had reused it in today's post. I think I'll make sure to use something more soothing/calming going forward just for tumblr, because you all have a special place in my heart.

Usually I'll open TikTok and do a separate video save to have a hi-res copy with music, but since I had recently created a shop on TT I only have commercially available music. Maybe I should take the shop down anyways, I'm really not sure if it'll help my art get notice or sell more stickers. I'd rather manage sales from my website anyways, but I feel like I should at least give it a try. You're welcome to tell me your thoughts on that!

I could go more into detail about my process for just uploading videos, but I feel like this is already getting TLDR. So feel free to let me know if you want me to ramble some more! I'd love to get input on that, as well as get an idea of what other artists are doing since I have no idea what I'm doing!

[majaloveschris]

I also want this to be over, but if he truly signed a contract (which I do believe he did), it's not that easy. Even if he realized he was stupid and made a big and dumb mistake, he can't say it's over. Maybe next time he won't get into things like this.

// This is the kinda behaviour I’m talking about that you seem to understand. You don’t have to go bully or harass HIM in his posts yourself but people who tend to believe they know better than the man himself somehow find a shelter here on your blog to diss him and also take the theories discussed here to harass HIM every time he posts anywhere. What gives any of you guys the right to call HIM dumb and stupid for decisions that affect no one but himself?? Why are you understanding that he made a big mistake with his personal life?? Like who are you to sit here and calculate that his decisions about his own life are wrong and you have the right to judge him for it?? Is it because he’s a celebrity you guys think it’s okay to have no boundaries and harass and bully these people about something that has nothing to do with anyone but themselves?? Because you chose to love this person you met on your screen you believe that gives you a right to their lives?? Chris Evans is with Alba wether for real or not is not for any of us to decide, disss, harass and bully HIM for. He’s not hurting anyone by dating Alba is he?? He’s not hurting anybody by fake/pr dating Alba is he?? Stop justifying this vile behaviour and giving these people a platform to diss, discuss and disrespect. He’s not dumb or stupid for doing something some of you don’t “approve” of. In fact anyone who sits here and thinks they actually know what’s good for him and his business better than himself and people who know him better are the stupid, dumb and delusional ones. As I said before learn some boundaries and where to draw the lines between personal and professional. They are famous doesn’t mean they have no personal life and regardless of what they do with their lives we don’t have a say and we definitely don’t have the right to disrespect them for it.

Alba is perfectly fine young woman who have done some questionable things in the past. Doesn’t make her a bad person, doesn’t make her a racist and certainly doesn’t justify the hate these two are getting for dating. Neither she nor Evans is or should be responsible for something someone else has done. They are not going to break (fake or real) because some obsessive stalker fans (read haters) dug years old dirt on people she wasn’t friends with at the time. Let’s be real and use common sense. Respect people’s privacy and decisions as you wish others to respect your affairs and that includes putting everything he does under a microscope to analyse if the relationship is real or not. It’s time to move past this and wait and watch.

P.S. You are unproblematic but the people who come here are NOT.

I don't think anybody here has ever dissed him. I always try to be cautious and avoid sharing asks that are hateful or in which people bully anyone. You should see those ones I delete, and some of them are disgusting. I disapprove of bullying, and I always tell people not to send hate to anybody. I've never seen a single person use my posts or theories to bully anybody, especially because I always say we don't know anything for sure and that everything is just a theory. I don't think I've ever been hateful toward anybody, so I don't understand how people would be able to use my words or posts to send hate. If it's happened, I'm sorry for that; it was never my intention. I never want or wanted anybody to feel the urge to send hate or make a hateful comment because of what I posted. However, I've talked about how I dislike that type of behavior. I try my best here to encourage people not to do all of the things we talked about earlier, but unfortunately, I can't supervise every person who comes here. I can decide what I share or say, but I can't control people. I'm all about providing an environment where we can talk about these things without hatred.

What you quoted were my words; what you quoted was written by me.And it was my opinion, which I can share because this is my page. I wish the worst thing anyone has ever said about him was stupid. Do I think this was a mistake? I do; I would say the same thing even if this whole thing were real (just my opinion). Saying that I think he made a mistake and was stupid to get into this isn't judging; it's forming an opinion. I have boundaries with him; that's why I don't post or repost certain things. When did I disrespect them? Any of them? I don't call them names, and I'm not hateful. I don't understand why you're attacking me like I'm some kind of monster whose entire page is about hating on them and encouraging people to do the same.

Alba still does questionable things, and I don't understand how you can say she is "perfectly fine" when she posted her own nude video on Instagram. People hold her responsible not only for what her friends have done but also for what she has done. But would you like to be friends with somebody who thinks Nazis are fun? Or who fat shames others? Because I'm not. And why? Because I don't understand them, I don't want to be around those types of people because I have a different moral compass and that behavior is not acceptable. I've never once held Chris accountable for something Alba and her friends have done. I do think this is PR, and I do think that most of the time he doesn't really have any other option than being around them, but Alba is willingly friends with these people. And she doesn't just spend an hour with these people every six months; she spends the majority of her time with them. Don't even get me started on Justin liking hateful tweets about Chris and his fans. And I guess it's also okay that he's been trolling the fandom since the beginning.

I also talked about how I don't like that people overanalyze certain things.

I don't really get how I justify vile behavior. I'm not sure why I'm the one getting these asks from you when there are plenty, much worse, Tumblr blogs, Instagram accounts, and Twitter pages, out there. I don't consider this place toxic just because we talk about a public relationship, especially when we do it respectfully.

I always say we can talk about everything here, as long as we do it respectfully and don't cross the line I set for this blog. And I respect your viewpoint, but I don't believe I am who you believe I am.

[kitchen-scamp-vibes]

What do you mean by "loosely" queer? I agree with you about Matt already having platform and not needing to be on d20, but feels kinda shitty to be like "these people are Real Queer and these people are Fake I mean Loosely Queer" ? like, I'm hoping I'm misunderstanding your meaning here but to say the regular cast on d20 like Ally Beardsley is "loosely" queer compared to who else d20 brings on is ? bad? Or to be like no I meant X from CR is the "not really queer" one is like also bad?

TLDR: I should have capitalized queer/Queer.

So firstly, I want to be clear that both this response and the OP are personal opinions/preferences, rather than say true fact, or something I think everyone should believe. Critical Role is not for me (yes I have tried) and I don't expect my feeling that way to change how someone who really likes that show feels and I'd hope the same would be true for the reverse (although prior experience would suggest otherwise). The same goes for my personal preferences as a queer person on what media I feel meets my standards for queer storytelling that I devote limited time and resources to.

That being said, my personal belief is that there is a difference between queer and Queer. I know that's not exclusive to me and there are smarter queer theorists than I who have discussed the topic but my personal bare bones is that one is merely a descriptor and the other is a political ideology or statement. It goes without saying that in a country that systemically hates most people, existing at all outside those boxes will get you some level of mistreatment and loss of privacy, but there are degrees to which that will impact a person based on how obviously they break those boundaries. This isn't to say that on an individual level anyone is more or less queer than someone else, but on a societal level one could be SEEN as more queer than the other based on a variety of factors. I'm not saying it's fair or that I agree it's the way the world SHOULD work, it's just is how it does right now and colors the conversation we are having.

To use some other celebrities as an example: Ellen DeGeneres, Neil Patrick Harris, Vico Ortiz, and Caitlyn Jenner might all be queer but I would only consider Vico Ortiz Queer, at this time (time and politics shift and there was a time where all of them have been more politically Queer but I'm speaking of their current existence). It might be a generational thing, but I have mixed feelings about trying to normalize gayness or queerness by making it look exactly like straightness except for two men or two women. It feels very "we're the safe gays" to me and while I again don't have an issue with that on an INDIVIDUAL level, I just prefer the personas I follow and media I consume to be doing a little more pushing back.

If I saw Liam O'Brien and Ally Beardsley both at Pride I wouldn't think "one of them has more of a right to be here than the other," they are both family on an individual level. I do think one of them has done more pushing back through the characters they create and the way they go through the world than the other. And when I'm criticizing companies and productions, that's what I'm talking about and focusing on. Dimension 20 has had a multitude of trans, ace, gay/lesbian, queer, etc. folks on their show and I'm not saying Critical Role hasn't done that at all, but they have done it significantly less and in a less successful way in my opinion. Again, I haven't watched any of their campaigns in full (I have tried all 3) but I remember when C2 ended there were fans pissed that Caleb and Essek "didn't end up together" and yet when I listened to that part of the episode it was clear to my ace ass that they were obviously in a partnership that fit their needs and was just as deep as it would have been if they had sex or kissed.

I know a lot of D20 fans are Intrepid Heroes/main season fans only but I personally tend to enjoy the Side Quests just as much, if not more. That means I've had a LOT of different casts and characters to enjoy, as well as DM/GMs, in a way that I wouldn't get from Critical Role, and thus more varied exposure to identities that are different from my own and each other. With the wealth of people I've gotten used to expecting (when will my wife, Jasmine Bhullar return from war?) I was disappointed to see that I was getting the most basic of mainstream people on the show I watch. Again, not to mention the racism and other grossness that CR has either condoned or enacted both on and off their shows, which was an equal part of my post that you chose to ignore. I'm not going to go into that on this response but V.J. Harris has a series plus other standalone videos on their tiktok about more of that stuff, if you are interested. He is by no means the only one who has spoken on this or made content about it but has been watching the show since the beginning and comes from an in-group POV which should be easier for the diehard Critters to handle. They are also concise while covering a broad range of events and incidents.

My final note, which is again a personal preference and not something I believe to be fact: just based off the energies of the recordings, I as a queer person feel safer with every D20 table/cast I've watched than I do the main CR group. That isn't based on a true belief, it's just the energy of their table puts me on edge. I'm sure they are decent people but they are just not for me and I prefer to spend my time and money elsewhere.

[leafs-lover]

Hey leafs-lover - hope you've had an amazing summer so far. I absolutely love the pieces you have written and you and a few other writers on here have inspired me to finally try and get an idea down on "paper" that's been circling around in my head now for a couple of years. I'm waaaaay older than the majority of people on this platform (I'm pretty sure anyway) - I didn't even know this platform existed a year ago (or its content) so I'm super overconscious about reaching out to anyone, whether it be about something I'm thinking of writing or even how to promote and celebrate the writers (like you) that I've really enjoyed reading. Anyway...my favorite leafs player for quite some time is William Nylander, and I have this whole story concocted in my head from the reader's POV that spans years, up to present day. I started writing the intro the other day but honestly, I don't know if it's way too detailed, if it's complete shit or if it's decent enough to keep going. I was wondering how do you go about getting your ideas mapped out? I'm not a writer per se but man, my job entails writing clear and concise emails so I've got some kind of writing background (😆). Do you just wing it and hope for the best for the first few fics and go from there?

I'm up at my family cottage and had a few glasses of wine so really sorry for the barrage of questions....I just feel the need to get this story out of my head 😊

Hey! Hope you're having an amazing summer too!

I am so glad you are inspired by myself and other writers to write yourself! Love new content creators❤

Everyone has a different way of planning their stories. I make an outline with a brief summary of what I want to happen in each part, key moments. I don't follow it religiously though. I find as I write, some parts need to be merged into one big part, or one is two long and should be broken down into multiple pieces. Everyone works a little differently, and as you keep going you'll find out what works for you - some parts I do end up winging, or weren't in the outline but as I was writing I felt like something was missing and added it in.

The "is this complete trash" is a completely normal feeling, I still feel that way when writing😂 but if i'm inspired by it, I keep going. For me, I will write it all out and then move on to another part, and maybe even be 3-4 parts ahead and then will go back and review the first one. At that point because I have a better idea of what is next I can decide to add something if I think it's missing, or I will delete something if it's not needed or mentioned somewhere else. And don't be afraid to delete shit, I have literally deleted 2000 words before!

I don't know many people who are writers on here, most of us do it because we enjoy it. I used to think I was way older than everyone on here, but as I started interacting with other writers or even just seeing some of their responses to other anons I realized I am not alone. 😂 Don't be scared to send DM's to other writers/ blogs, you can bounce ideas, send paragraphs (or even entire parts) you're unsure of, or just chat about anything with. We are nice!

[int0-the-tide]

Being in Live Events

Hello Everyone,

It has been quite a while since I have used this space, but I am here for educational purposes. I have been assigned to create some content specific to me and my work within the entertainment industry. There hasn’t been a time where I have really shared what it is that I do on this platform, but today is going to be that day. For this post I am going the educational route rather than entertaining, however there might be some of the latter in the future. Anyways, lets begin todays topic, being an audio tech. I am currently in the middle of building my career within the entertainment technology industry as an audio show technician. Now what does that mean? Well, it could be several things depending on what you like about certain aspects of audio in live events. For a general scope of responsibilities an audio technician is someone who has designs, calibrates, implements, programs, and maintains all pieces of audio equipment for a show. Again, I know how general that statement sounds, however it really depends on the person when it comes to their niche area, and these are just the guidelines of what they should have at least the basic knowledge of. So, when you think of audio for a show what comes to mind? Maybe speakers, a microphone, instruments, a mixer, sometimes a DJ? These are all correctly identified pieces of the audio puzzle that a technician must put together and take apart, time, and time again. However, this is what the consumer line of audio looks like. There is a large world beyond that of a recording studio or household use to consider. When you go to large concerts or festivals do you ever up look up in the air and/or at the sides of the stage and notice a large stack of speakers facing the audience? Do you ever wonder what it takes to get them that high in the air? Or even how the sound gets from the band into those speakers? These may seem like easy questions at first, but they are questions that take months of planning to properly answer, and part of my job is being able to provide different answers depending on the scenario. There is a lot of critical thinking, troubleshooting and creative solutions that go into this job, but it is extremely rewarding when you can do things correctly and see the work you just put in right before your eyes. I recently worked a show here in Orlando, FL, called the Grace Hopper Celebration. It is a large convention that celebrates women in STEM which lasted almost a week. I was lucky enough to be helping the audio team build the main stage audio systems which taught me a lot about the workflow of others and collaborating with different teams like video and LED to achieve our goals. I also learned how frustrating some things can be when there are opposing forces that you can’t change or the only thing you can do is wait for them to be gone in order to move forward with your own task. If anyone here is in entertainment, then you will understand how critical soft skills are to our industry. They can make or break your relationships, job opportunities and overall career. At the end of the day, it is better to be as flexible and transparent as possible with any situation so that everyone can move forward more fluidly. The point I am trying to make though, is that no matter how many obstacles we ran into at that show I learned something every single moment and would not trade the experience for anything. I realized things I was good at, slightly scared of, and not so great at. At the end of the day, it was all a learning experience that I will use going forward in my career every time I am on another show. Luckily all that hard work wasn’t for nothing either, because when everything was finally put up it looked spectacular, and I got to be a part of it. Here’s a little picture of what some of it looked like from the catwalk view if you’re interested. This is just a little bit of the reward that you will receive in this industry if you go a similar route that I did. If you stuck around, thanks for reading all the way until the end. :)

[bumblebaubles]

https://www.dazeddigital.com/beauty/article/41436/1/mixed-race-identity-cgi-influencers-lil-miquela

ok maybe its the petty in me but im sort of relishing in the discomfort ai influencers or avatars are giving people. 

Im not a conservative edgelord that hates woke snowflakes and cancel culture however i do think that true accountability and responsibility cant be forced through half baked apologies or that you can rush someone into understanding complex societal or governmental oppression by equating every single uncomfortable question or misunderstanding to the most extreme divisive or negative context. 

real progress takes time, understanding, and patience and a lot of people don’t have that. a lot of people use social activism or general left buzzwords or theology as a type of coping mechanism for what theyve experienced and while having a name for the behaviors you hated or for the systemic pitfalls you’re effected by are validating people have thrown away the responsibility that comes with being able to have hard conversations about them. 

theyd rather find a celebrity or influencer thats pRoBlEmAtIc and say things they wouldnt normally get away with about people they dont care about and call it a day. make fun of their nose, demean their talent, their career whatever and guess what if you dont like it Im apart of x group that was offended so if you call me out you’re taking the side of the oppressor blah blah its dishonest and a bastardization of what they claim to stand for. peace love equity unity whatever bullshit theyre spouting while saying terrible things about someone because theyre bored and not because they know anything or want to tell anyone about important issues.

since they no longer hold this responsibility, its up to the people “in power” or the illusion of it. its up to people with a platform to spread the word. its their job as a human being to care about other people and theres absolutely no excuse for not knowing every detail of every aspect of every experience a racial or sexual minority has ever had! how ignorant of them!!! 

since real people are prone to make mistakes, be problematic, say things they shouldnt and can never ever change under any circumstances real people just wont cut it anymore. 

cANT YOU SEE? YOUR CALLS FOR DIVERSITY, RELATABILITY, REPRESENTATION AND THE ‘BARE MINIMUM’ HAVE BEEN ANSWERED

what better people to carry the weight of public scrutiny than the PEOPLE THAT ARENT EVEN REALLLLL. 

AI can understand you, AI can represent you, AI IS you. 

no more jackie aina profiting off of soro soke candles. no more white tiktokers getting cancelled every other month for saying the nword or something. no more demanding actors speak out about russia invading ukraine or being mad that they dont know hong kong is losing its sovereignty, or what sovereignty even means!

AI knows EVERYTHING! it KNOWS the history of israels invasion of palestine. It KNOWS the new french president is from a nazi party. Ai KNOWS what the people want to hear because computers the size of buildings are scraping and storing YOUR PERSONAL INFORMATION thats being sold FOR PROFIT!!! what better way to get EVERYTHING you wanted from a person, WHO ISNT EVEN A PERSONNNNN!

you dont have to worry about mental health, problematic past, their passive role in white supremacist society by not acknowledging their privilege!

AI is racial ambiguous! AI tells you what youve been DYING to hear! AI will be there for you when people let.you.down.

you dont like it? well fuck you.

[filthforfriends]

Holding Giorgia Soleri Accountable

I refuse to glorify anyone by celebrating the good and ignoring the problematic. These pictures are very difficult to find, which is no accident, and why I'm posting them here. The translations are rough, please correct me.

User AuroraFerrandes: Okay. We call a surgeon.

Giorgia: I have some big n#$!a ass anyway too.

The issue: use of the n-word. If you don't understand why a white person using it in any context is bad, here is an easy article. The intent behind using a slur doesn't change its history, its still harmful. She is also sexually objectifying black bodies in the phrase "big n#$!a ass." Reminder that "Sexual objectification occurs when a woman’s body, body parts, or sexual functions are isolated from her whole and complex being and treated as objects simply to be looked at, coveted, or touched" (Fredrickson & Roberts, 1997). Because feminism is intersectional, racism is inherently anti-feminist, and thats relevant to her activism. Additionally, the sexualization of black women has been a pervasive issue in its own right. Read more here.

Giorgia: And no raga,* I became a Muslim.

*raga is Italian slang referring to a group of people. I'm not sure how to translate it in this case.

The issue: is not that she is wearing a headscarf. Headscarves are not exclusive to Islam, however hijabs are. "I became a Muslim," implies that she's wearing a hijab, which makes this cultural appropriation. Cultural appropriation is racism. Obviously, Giorgia doesn't actually think she's suddenly a Muslim. This is a joke, and that makes it more problematic. Here are some young Muslim women talking about how meaningful their hijab is, so you understand why a humorous comment about it is offensive. Don't fall into the trap of finding something funny just because it comes from POC. Examine that shit. Their culture and spirituality aren't a joke. Remember that racism and feminism are mutually exclusive.

There's another part to this that I don't expect Giorgia or non-Americans to know, but now is a chance to educate yourself. Post 9/11, Islamophobia poisoned our country. There is a violent, blood soaked history behind Muslim jokes, that everyone should abstain from participating in.

The issue: the fact that this is racist cultural appropriation is obvious. If you're still confused what that means, here's an article. I'd like to reiterate that all of these images compromise her credibility as a feminist advocate.

Twitter Apology: "I’m extremely sorry. Many people sent me a few post where I used racist slurs and cultural appropriation. I’m sorry to have offended, hurt, and triggered people. I can only thank those of you who are holding me accountable for the horrible things I wrote - I want to take responsibility for these mistake in the hope of growing and not making them again and because I absolutely owe an apology to the communities I have offended. I made a huge mistake, i’m ashamed and I want to apologize to those I hurt with my mistakes - as a young, ignorant and privileged woman. I very well know that intentions are not enough when you hurt someone. I deeply apologize. I used those words 6-7 years ago and – despite knowing that this isn’t an excuse or a way to justify my actions – in the past few years - (especially in the last 2-3 years) I tried to grow, become aware, educate myself and i will never stop doing it because it is the only way to become a more and more respectful and inclusive individual. I still have a lot to learn and mistakes to make - but I can guarantee you that I’m no longer the person who wrote those things. I know that apologies don’t need to be accepted and I can’t blame those who won’t, i can totally understand if you are upset or angry at me. But I strongly hope that you can sense how deeply sorry I am. With love and apologies, Giorgia."

The issue: Allegedly she was originally contacted about this on Instagram, which is a much bigger platform. Instead of addressing it there, she apologized to a smaller audience on Twitter. This apology is also missing a key component that is very much her responsibility: resources. Why is what she did bad? How can she and others improve? She needs to educate her audience, because this burden all too often falls on oppressed parties.

Yes I recognize that this was an above average apology, but remember that apologizing for perpetuating oppression is the bare fucking minimum.

[vibraniumwing]

only girl in the world.

a sam wilson x fem!reader wherein the reader cleans the apartment due to jealousy.

WARNING: NSFW (18+, minors DNI. ), praise kink, oral stimulation (f receiving), fingering, vaginal penetration (wrap it before you tap it lovelies), light choking, swearing, the setting is set somewhere in between AoU and CACW so like around the time in Ant-Man ?? also slight au ( i think )

A/N: so this is for @anchoeritic's 3k writing challenge! seeing that she’s a fellow sam wilson simp, i chose him for this fic (and we are seriously lacking in sam wilson content i hate this) and because it’s sam’s birthday we’re gonna celebrate >:)))) icb he’s an aries though. uGh

prompt/scenario: character A catching character B singing

word count: 3.7k

---

Dating a superhero meant there was a lot of restrictions; cuddles and movie dates with them are fleeting moments since you never know when they would get a call about a grape-headed alien terrorizing the planet and you couldn’t flaunt them as much as you wanted to because your safety would be greatly affected if their arch nemesis finds out about your existence.

But regardless of it all, you were thankful because Sam never made you feel less of what you really are to him. A lot of your friends who know about your relationship with The Falcon were envious about how mature the both of you are, managing to balance both of your work lives and your personal ones at home; none of them really knowing how immature the both of you are behind closed doors.

Making this another reason why you loved the privacy being hidden from the public eye; you felt like you were in your own coming-of-age, rom-com movie with Sam with all the hidden rendezvous at The Washington Mall at midnight and drive around the empty streets of the city just until the crack of dawn or just stay at home and cook countless of meals, teaching each other recipes from both sides of your families

It was the relationship anyone could have ever dreamed of.

---

“You’re not making this any easier for me, baby girl.” Sam said, sighing inwardly as he stuffed his duffel. He was going over to New York for a few days, probably on another mission with the Avengers (or training with them) and you weren’t having any of it; wanting nothing more than to have him home and with you for a few more days一 possibly forever if that was even possible.

You groaned softly at his response, sitting on the bed with your knees hugged to your chest as you watch him ready his things for yet another mission. “Then don’t go” You simply told him, face holding the same sad expression as your lower lip was jutted out in a small pout as you looked away, not waiting to tear up once again; him leaving for missions was always the hardest.

A chuckle left his lips, setting the suitcase down on the carpeted floor of your shared room before claiming his spot next to you; the dip of the bed from his weight caused you to look at him. “You know I wouldn’t dare to leave if I had the chance to, right?” He asked, his scooting closer to you and pressed a kiss to your shoulder. “But I always come back, right? Because you’re my home.”

You relaxed under his touch, stretching your legs unto the bed and wrapped your arms around his muscular frame, hugging him close to you in fear that he might disappear all of a sudden. “I know, but do you really have to go?” You murmur, hiding your face against his neck, the way your breath falls on his skin causes goosebumps to rise on his own.

“I have to, they need me, sweets.” He explains, wrapping his arms around your own frame and squeezes gently, enough to convey that he’ll be fine; that he’ll be safe and unharmed after all of the fighting he has due.

“I’ll be back in no time.” His reassurance made you sigh inwardly, knowing that you can’t convince him otherwise. Sam was always just like that, once something is set on his mind on something, he won’t stop until he gets it done. He rarely second guesses what he wants and he does, you’re the person he talks to.

You didn’t speak anymore, opting to let the warmth from his body consume you and lull you into sleep, his hand tracing small shapes into your back as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Go to sleep, baby. I love you.”

---

The sunlight that peeked in through the sheer fabric of the curtains was enough to wake you up, reaching over to Sam’s side, expecting to feel him there but instead you were greeted with the sound of paper crumpling from the side of your hand. Stirring awake, you sat up and grabbed the note that was folded neatly.

“I’ll be back soon, baby girl. Don’t miss me too much, I love you.” You read outloud, adoring how neat his handwriting was, hugging the paper to your chest before whispering, “I love you too” before placing the note by your bedside table, rolling out of bed to get on with your day when your phone dinged. Looking at the lit up screen, you smiled at the message from Sam.

[ from: birdman lover ]

- It hasn’t even been a day and I already miss you.

- This’ll be a long week.

- Have a great day though.

- I love you.

---

- Steve’s still clueless on how phones work but he’s getting there. He “greets you a hello”.

The rest of the week was your normal routine, aside from the occasional texts and calls you would get from Sam whenever he had the chance to check his phone; telling you how much he missed you and sharing stories of what’s going on inside the compound. It was like he never left, the only difference being he wasn’t physically there to give you the affection.

Saturday morning soon rolled around and you were bouncing off the walls excited that you had to wait just one more day before Sam could come back home; come back to you. You practically bounced off the walls as you did all your errands一 mainly you getting your car cleaned and your weekly Target run一 and your day was all rainbows and sunshines.

Until it wasn’t. You were scrolling through your Instagram when you saw a picture that made your blood boil immensely. It was a photo of an actress (who was extremely good looking) in the arms of The Falcon. You had to take a few moments in to fully register the fact that the woman had managed to snag a photo with him, “He’s even hotter in person.” You read the caption out loud, eyes rolling in irritation, even replying to some comments from her fanbase, making it seem like they were dating.

You rarely get jealous about anything with Sam, being so secure with your relationship with him but seeing someone who has a platform freely post him made you writhe in your seat about how you should be the one flexing him like that, not her or anyone else.

You opted to call your lover to tell him how you feel but there was this side of you that didn’t want to go through a whole discourse with him through the phone so you went with the better option, cleaning the fuck out of your apartment until your agression washes away.

Plugging your phone to the sound system, you started off with Rihanna’s Only Girl in the World before grabbing the broom from the small closet in your apartment's kitchen, starting to sweep the floor. “You’re a bad bitch, Y/N. Now go clean,” You hyped yourself up in the mirror before strutting back to the living room to sweep your emotions away.

Unbeknownst to you however was the fact that Sam was well on his way home. He got to go back home earlier than expected and he didn’t tell you, wanting to give you a surprise. Jogging up the stairs of your apartment complex, he was practically rushing to make it your door so he can finally kiss you.

Finally finding the keys to your shared apartment, he opened the door and slowly creeped in, expecting to see you seated on the couch but what he saw was something else. He was stunned beyond words to see you clad nothing but his shirt and a messy bun while holding a broom, singing your heart out.

“Want you to make me feel like I’m the only girl in the world” you sang out loud, holding onto the broom as if it was a mic while you danced, awkwardly body rolling to the beat. “Like I’m the only one that you’ll ever love, like I’m the only one who knows your heart” You continued, starting to “sweep” the floor again while grooving to the beat of the song, not noticing Sam who was silently watching you.

“Like I’m the only one who’s in command” Your voice blending into the music as you rocked around the room, singing your heart out to the chorus. “Cause I’m the only one who understands how to make you feel like a ma一 Sam!”

You dropped the broom, jumping up in the air as you turned around to see your boyfriend leaning by the wall, watching you with an amused expression while holding his arms out to you. “Are you just gonna stand there or come here and give me a hug?” He questioned, raising up an eyebrow at you.

Wasting no time, you paused the song before making your way over to him and jumped into his arms, wrapping your legs around his waist as you hugged him. “How long have you been here? Why are you here already? Shouldn’t you be coming home tomorrow?” Your bombardment with questions made him chuckle, his arms going under your thighs to support your weight, walking towards the couch and settling the both of you on there.

“I wanted to surprise you, baby. We finished a little bit earlier than expected so the moment we got back to the compound I was well on my way home.” He answered, one of his hands retreating from your backside to sneak up and cup your jaw, thumb tracing it gently. His eyes were locked with yours, filled with adoration and love as he continued, “turns out you have a surprise of your own for me. What’s got you cleaning so aggressively?”

You laughed, the anger you had just moments ago melting away as you lean into his touch, “It’s nothing, Sammy. Just me being a little jealous, is all.” You explained, finding it easy to admit your feelings. Your relationship with him was just like that; centered on honesty, understanding, and love. The reason why you’re so assured with him.

“Jealous? What’s got my baby jealous?” His brows were furrowed at the answer, mind trying to remember his actions prior to this conversation to see if he had done anything wrong but came up with nothing. “Did I do something?” He questioned, sitting up a bit as the conversation got more serious.

“I just saw this picture of this you and this actress posted on her instagram and一” you paused, finding it silly now that you’ve even been this jealous about this in the first place. “一I just got jealous that she could post you on their social media so freely. Kind of made me realize that I’m still not existent in the eyes of others; I should be the one posting you like that. Kind of made me realize that I’m not the only girl in the world that wants you.” you finished, not wanting to look into his eyes anymore at the sudden sadness from being hidden.

Normally, you wouldn’t even bat an eye on it but seeing how broken you were, Sam was shattered that you had to go through that thought. “There’s no need to feel ashamed that you got jealous, Y/N.” He said, the hand that was on your jaw now going under your chin to make you look at him again. “I know I insisted that I hide you from the public eye so you can be safe from harm and I’m sorry that because of it makes you feel like this.”

He sighed softly, leaning in to press a chaste kiss against your lips. “But if you’re ready to be introduced to everyone, even to the team, then I’ll be more than glad to show you to the world.” Sam said, his lips just millimeters away from yours, “The only girl I’ll ever love.” He finished, locking his lips with yours.

You swore on the fact that Sam’s lips were made for your own, the pace slow and sensual, enough to relay that he was sticking to his words and that you didn’t need to worry about anything. His plush tiers felt soft against yours, his teeth sinking into your bottom one, nibbling against it softly before swiping his tongue against it.

“Does my angel want me to show her how much she really means to me?” He whispers, pressing one more kiss to your lips before pulling back, locking his gaze with yours, pupils blown with love and adoration clouded with a hint of lust over the thought of seeing you squirm under him.

Given the fact that you were sitting on his lap, you could feel how hard he was under you. “You feel that, darling? You do that to me.” He groans as you shift, the friction causing his dick to twitch inside his tight jeans. “Be a good girl and use your words, baby.”

“Want you, Sam.” You say, mind too aroused and clouded with perverse thoughts due to the lack of touch you had from him this week to make a concise sentence. “Want you to make me feel good, please.” You beg, brows furrowing lightly in need as you watch him study your expression, a small smile forming on his lips as he easily hoists you up, arms gripping your thighs.

“How can I resist such a good girl begging for me to make her feel good?” He questions, gracing your lips with another chaste kiss as he carries you into your shared bedroom, placing you on the bed as he hovers above you. “I’ll make you feel so good tonight, sweets.”

His lips are then on yours again, his lower half grinding on yours a few times to rile you up, making you elicit a few moans that caused him to go overdrive. He grunts, taking in the scandalous sounds you make before sitting back up, taking the shirt off from your body, throwing his head back at the sight of you clad in only your underwear. “You do know how to make me go wild, baby doll.”

You smiled at him, happy that you were able to make him go haywire at just the sight of you not even fully naked. “My clothes never seem to stay on with you around anyways.” You answer, making him chuckle lightly as he started to attack your neck with kisses, nipping at the skin quite harshly making you hiss in pleasurable pain.

“You look better naked” was all he said before taking in one of your breasts, tongue swirling around the hard nub as his hand teased the other, fingers pinching on it lightly making you take a sharp gasp. He did this for a few moments before kissing his way from the valley of your breasts all the way down to the top of your panties.

Sam looked up at you with a devilish grin upon the realization of what lingerie you were wearing, “My angel looks so good.” he praises, taking a moment to admire your already fucked out appearance with lips swollen and hickey littered skin. He was quick to take off your underwear, eyes filled with hunger at the sight of your soaking cunt.

This feeded his ego to no ends, seeing you so needy for him. “I haven’t even touched you yet you’re already so wet for me, baby girl.” he commented, hands caressing your inner thighs teasingly as he took a moment to drink in the sight of you.

The way his rough and slightly calloused hands were in juxtaposition to the smoothness of your skin granted goosebumps to run along your skin, the cold air of the room adding on to your arousal. “Sam, please. Need you.” You begged once more, attempting to close your legs for some needed friction but his sudden grip on it making you think otherwise.

“Almost there, baby. Patience.” He said, bringing two digits to very lightly graze upon your slit before bringing it up to your lips, his thumb tapping your bottom lip, “Open up, sweets. Wanna see you taste yourself first.” He ordered, wanting to see you suck on his fingers.

Wanting nothing more than his touch, you easily obliged and took his fingers in without him prying them open. Your eyes were locked with his as you sucked on it, setting a blaze inside his eyes that you haven’t seen before, that lone making your stomach twist in knots.

As soon as Sam was satisfied at how wet you made his fingers, he finally gave your throbbing pussy the attention it yearned for. Inserting the two digits inside of you with ease as he slowly started to pump it in and out of your heat while his thumb rubbed circles on your sensitive bundle of nerves.

You were a moaning mess under his touch, back arching at the slightest touch he would do to your clit. You were overwhelmed with the pleasure he was providing you. “F-fuck!” You breathlessly moan, hips bucking up as you wanted more of his touch.

Sam then leaned, tongue lapping up your sweet juices as he sucked on your aching clit, the gentle suckling was sinful to your ears. He moaned at the taste of you, its vibrations against you making you whine at the contact. He curled his fingers inside you, easily finding your sweet spot upon seeing how you writhed under his touch.

With Sam’s tongue abusing your clit to no end and his digits mercilessly pumping in and out of you, the tension was all too much to handle that the knot that was in your stomach finally broke. “Go on, baby. Come for me, why don’t you.” He said, feeling how your walls were clamping up around him. The euphoria that followed made your legs tremble as you reached your high, shamelessly moaning Sam’s name mixed with profanities as he continued to finger you through your orgasm.

“Such a good girl for me” Was his words, rising up from his position. You watched as he licked up every last drop of your cum off his fingers, rolling off the bed to rid himself off from his own clothes, your mouth practically watering at the sight of his rock hard length that sprung out from the tight confinements of his boxers.

You were gonna reach out to feel him when he stopped you, “No, baby. Tonight, it’s all about you, remember?” he said, stroking his length a few times, thumb circling around his tip that was glistening with pre-cum as he got back on the bed, positioning himself on top of you. “You ready?”

“Y-yes, Sam.” and upon hearing your answer, he eased into you. Both moaning at the longing of feeling each other intimately. No matter how many times the two of you would fuck, you still couldn’t get used to his size. He filled you up quite easily, his hips meeting yours as he filled you in deep.

Ever the gentleman, he waited for you to give the signal that you were ready and upon your nod, he started to move slowly, wanting to ease you into the pace.. Sam’s groans were music to your ear, “So fucking tight, angel.” He said, one of his hands reaching up to wrap around your neck, pressing against its sides lightly.

“F-faster, Sam. Please” You said and he complied, like your words were pressed a switch in him, he started to relentlessly slam into you, fucking you into the bed and into oblivion. His other hand was on the headboard, palm spread out to gain some support, the bed shaking violently as he continued.

“Let me hear those moans, angel. Let everyone know who you belong to.” Sam said, the hold around your neck tightening slightly, wanting to see you slowly gasp out for air as you let out those heavenly yet sinful sounds, “Who do you belong to, baby?”

“Y-You, Sam!” You answer, feeling your body writhe as another orgasm was already brewing at the pit of your stomach. “F-fuck, I-i’m yours!” You continued, eyes practically rolling to the back at the immense amount of pleasure you got from him drilling you into the mattress.

With those words that left your lips, he started to pound to you even rougher, not caring if the neighbouring apartments heard your cries of pleasure or the squeaking of the bed. You were his and it was his very intention to let everyone know that. “That’s right, doll. You belong to me.” he said, his eyes on your fucked out face. “Mine to fuck and mine to love.”

Feeling the knot in your stomach about to burst, your hands were gripping the bed sheets as you cried out in pleasure, “I’m gonna cum!” body unable to handle the amount of pleasure being handed to you as Sam continued to fuck you out, riding out your high until his own climax hit with one final slam, moaning as he filled you up with his own cum.

Pulling out slowly, Sam took the time to admire his own cum mixed with your drip down from your cunt, a feeling of satisfaction spread through his chest at the sight of you. He leaned in to kiss you once again, this time it was soft and just filled with love, hand running along your sides gently, “Such a good girl for me.” he whispered, pressing one last kiss before he stood up and walked over to the bathroom.

You attempted to follow him, but ultimately failed as your legs were shaking too much from your recent orgasm. You could hear Sam chuckle as he re-emerged from the other room, a wet washcloth in his hand as he approached you. “Let me take care of it, alright princess?” He said softly.

He then started to clean you up, making sure to whisper soft praises about how you took him so well and of how you were so good for him. The moment he was done, he mindlessly threw the cloth into the hamper, collapsing on the bed and took you in his arms, eager to cuddle you. Sam pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, “I love you, Y/N. You’re the only girl I’ll ever love.”

You hummed softly, making yourself comfortable in his arms, reaching up to steal a kiss from him, “I love you too, Sammy. I’ll always love you.”

---

TAGLIST: @harrysweasleys @selenasprompts @weasleytwins-41 @anchoeritic @darthwheezely (hello fellow the falcon simp)

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[bondsmagii]

As an artist who happens to do some NSFW work, I have slowly watched the internet grow more and more inhospitable to anyone who doesn't produce "pure" (e.g. marketable), censored, corporate-friendly art. It's fucking disheartening, even more so to see most of the art community congratulate it as if censorship has EVER been a good thing for art. NSFW getting banned from site after site should alarm fucking everyone. But sexual content (hell, even artistic nudes) is an "acceptable" target

I hate the corporate internet. I hate the bootlickers who celebrate whenever a platform gets censored. The internet does not need to be "child friendly", that's just republican purity rhetoric repackaged. "Think of the children" always seems to arise especially whenever it comes to queer content,. My content ISN'T for kids. I don't want them to look at it, I shouldn't have to just stop posting or stoo making art on the chance a kid may see it bc they're lying about their age to see adult content

the way I've always seen it is that "think of the children!!" tends to be a dogwhistle. who it's a dogwhistle for depends on the situation, but it's always a dogwhistle for a bunch of people who are actually personally uncomfortable over some other aspect of the issue, but who recognise that stating this outright will not win them popular support. so for example, fundamentalist Christian groups crying "think of the children!" so they can target any kind of LGBT content or expression, from gay characters in TV shows to the right for guy couples to marry. or TERFs crying "think of the children!" so they can target trans people, most likely trans women in particular. or even apparently progressive Terminally Online leftists crying "think of the children!" so they can demand increasing censorship, all based on the fact that they don't like the content so they feel it should be banned forever. I am immediately suspicious of any argument that appeals to some idealised vulnerable victim group, because I have not yet seen an example of this where the real motives haven't been insidious and completely incompatible with my own morals. if your campaign has the same slogan as TERFs and alt-right conspiracy theorists, it's maybe time to have a good long think.

I totally agree with the fact that the internet shouldn't be family friendly, too. I think it should be like any open public space -- there should be dedicated areas where children can go and be safe, under supervision from a responsible adult. but there should also be places where adults can go and be safe from the risk of being held responsible for someone else's unaccompanied child seeing something they shouldn't. it's not our responsibility to look after other people's children. we have a responsibility to stay out of dedicated spaces for them, such as children's game websites and forums, but with technology how it is today there's no excuse for a child to be allowed free, unattended reign on the internet. it's the parent or guardian's responsibility to ensure that their child is using the internet safely. the real reason that websites bleat on about being "family friendly" is because that's code for "advertiser friendly", and as always, this is all about money.

finally, I'm gonna fucking say it. kids reach a certain point, probably their mid-teens, where a lot of them are going to be curious about fucked up shit. this might be looking up dark shit on a Wikipedia binge, or wanting to have a laugh at weird porn, or even wanting to test themselves with endurance games like shock sites and gore. this is normal fucking behaviour, and I think it should be allowed. you very quickly find out if its not for you, and with no major harm done. not to mention all of the people I know who were into dark shit as teens have grown up to be perfectly normal adults with a good grasp of their limits and an idea of how to sensibly consume and interact with dark media. the biggest freaks out there are the fluffy cottagecore positivity happy ending people, who are often pro-censorship and not above sending harassment and threats to people who love fictional villains. I truly believe that the complete avoidance of any dark themes and the refusal to interact with anything that isn't safe or happy leads to a noticeable decrease in empathy. these people interact with the world based only upon what makes them feel good, and inherently this prevents them from interacting with situations without putting themselves at the centre of it.