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#I know that’s what my doctor will say!! fucking hate that because I know he only has 2 responses to me it’s either because I’m fat or it’s
triple-pupil · 10 months
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Because I think he deserves both sides of the coin.
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camellcat · 8 months
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WTFFF I thought thirteen would be my new girl crush love of my life heart eyes wife you-came-after-twelve-you-must-be-better-than-they're-all-saying bbygirl and then I had to sit down and watch as she told a man who (if he were not a murderer, of course) literally every regeneration before her would've LOVED and FULLY SUPPORTED that "the systems aren't the problem. how people use and exploit the system, that's the problem. people like you" </33333 !?!?
#WHERE IS THAT POST THAT SAID NINE WOULD KILL THIRTEEN FOR BEING A CLASS TRAITOR#WHY WOULD YOU SAY “ERODE PEOPLE'S TRUST IN AUTOMATION” ALL WORRIED AND CONCERNED LIKE THAT???#WHEN DID YOU START LIKING AUTOMATION OVER PEOPLE THINKING AND DOING THINGS FOR THEMSELVES???#AND WHY ARE YOU TRAVELING WITH A COPPER??? WE HATE COPPERS??????#did we FORGET into the dalek?? how about how he treated danny?? god there's so much more I can't even remember off the top of my head#(I understand soldiers are different from cops but c'mon don't even PRETEND twelve would've been any nicer if blue or danny were just COPS)#also a bit off topic bUT MAY I JUST TALK ABOUT ARACHNIDS IN THE UK FOR HALF A GODAMNED SECOND—#I know the companions are usually the ones to do the doctor's dirty work here but like#I just can't see the other doctors NOT having the business man lure the spider for being so fuckin annoying about it#like I was genuinely surprised when they had him do that whole song and dance about not doing it and then he actually just. didn't do it#the doctor LOVES fucking with evil rich business men this is PERFECT. plus why not get back at him for being awful to their companions?#absolutely gobsmacked thirteen let him act like that. I am wrong in thinking that the others would've shut his shit down a LOT quicker??#anyways. I love jodie whittaker and it's just so upsetting to have her doctor do something so wildly off#THIRTEEN PLEASE I HAD SUCH FAITH IN YOUUU I WAS IGNORING THE HATERS AND FOR WHAT#I can SEE the other doctors in her still I can FEEL them they're there she's doing an AMAZING job but. oh my god. what did they make her do#I can't even say she feels ooc as a whole because jodie is bloody brilliant. it's just these... moments. that don't make ANY sense to me...#especially coming off of twelve?? I get the radical personality switch but that belief is a core part of the doctor. or at least I THOUGHT#thirteenth doctor#doctor who#I still love all of you who love her and reading ur posts/fics but I. will not be making any myself. I do not think.
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my mum's staying for the weekend pray for me
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siobhanromee · 9 months
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why does no one understand the importance of privacy any more (/nobody here)
#Like my irl friends are not totally freaked out by the whole live 365 thing#Like I HATE the idea that someone can know where you are at all times#It's so scary#And then if you voice this opinion#People are like are you trying to hide something? And the thing is I want to be able to should i need to#Like i dont want people asking why I'm going to a certain doctor or why I shop where I shop#Or like who's house I'm at#And I know it is genuine concern on the part of some people but it's so fucking scary#And then theres the whole instagram thingy#Which I only really have bc I hate being left out#and it makes it really easy to start conversation bc someone can post that they went to a movie and I can say oh I saw that one did u enjoy#And so on and so forth#But like I dont like that everyone has to have it and wants to have yours#And my brother who I detest came into my room and was like what are you trying to hide#When I turned off my phone#Like I wasnt even doing anything other than watching a youtube video abt conservative book banning#Which he would find boring. And I dont want him to know what I'm watching because I hate him and I dont want him to know what I care abt#Bc anything I care abt can be something he can bully me over#And he never fucking listens when I tell him to stop. Not sure how I'm going to get through another year at home#He makes me so miserable and then nobody does anything abt it and when someone does make a consequence hes like 'oh its bc your the fa..#..favourite child'#And he was like I know you have an Instagram account which like i was technically not supposed to have as a teen. But I'm a legal adult and#I can do what I want now#at least in that aspect#Oh and ppl excuse his behaviour bc hes a boy. Well I'm a fucking boy too and I never pulled that shit. (Ig I'm a man now. Weird to call mys#...myself that. Young man makes a little more sense)#Damn this started as a vent abt privacy but it's really abt my brother#Honest to god wish I wasnt related#Or at least that I didnt have to deal with him#And he calls me stupid sometimes bc I dont get his jokes and I respond seriously to his jestful questions and
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fregget-frou · 2 years
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Minor vent today was just really bad :p
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Ok I don’t know if this is dumb to ask but is it embarrassing to need to go home because of period cramps?? I think I made a big deal but I mean I did pass out but also I’ve heard people do deal with it??? I’m pissing off my parents because I’ve been sick so often and having to make them leave work because of it. It hurt alot but like. Idk.! I’m not even sure if I should’ve even gone home????? I just oh my god I feel really dumb and weak for some reason but also I get it because I passed out from the pain and this just does not happen but also I was told to ask my doctor which I know he’ll just say it’s my weight but. I don’t fucking know. I feel like I’m gaslighting myself and having a meltdown over a scratch but it’s not a scratch to me but aLSO I know that even if it wasn’t I should react and cause problems I’m being a burden. I mean they said it themselves I’m disrupting their work more often and I don’t want to do that but the last time I tried to tough it out I had to go to the ER which made an even bigger disruption and I just don’t wanna do that again.
Ok I don’t know if this is dumb to ask but is it embarrassing to need to go home because of period cramps?? I think I made a big deal but I mean I did pass out but also I’ve heard people do deal with it??? I’m pissing off my parents because I’ve been sick so often and having to make them leave work because of it. It hurt alot but like. Idk.! I’m not even sure if I should’ve even gone home????? I just oh my god I feel really dumb and weak for some reason but also I get it because I passed out from the pain and this just does not happen but also I was told to ask my doctor which I know he’ll just say it’s my weight but. I don’t fucking know. I feel like I’m gaslighting myself and having a meltdown over a scratch but it’s not a scratch to me but aLSO I know that even if it wasn’t I should react and cause problems I’m being a burden. I mean they said it themselves I’m disrupting their work more often and I don’t want to do that but the last time I tried to tough it out I had to go to the ER which made an even bigger disruption and I just don’t wanna do that again.
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jackalopefreckles · 2 years
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SURGEON SAID I COULD TAKE OFF THE MEDICAL BINDER IT FEELS WEIRRD ITS SO WEIRD IM LAYING IN BED AND LIKE what the fuck what the fuck I can feel my whole fucking??? Just me what the fuck whatr eufkc wbat3 the fuck
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WE FINISHED SHE HULK THAT WAS CRAZY... THAT GOT SO GOOD AROUND THE LAST 4 EPISODES. AND THEN THEY FUCKED UP. FIRST UP FUCK PRISON NO CHARACTER SHOULD ALLOW THEMSELVES TO GO TO PRISON THAT IS ABUSE NOTHING ELSE FACT. OTHERWISE... THE WAY THEY INTERRUPTED THE STORY AND DID A WEIRD ENDING WAS SOO WEIRDD... BUT THE ENDING ENDING WAS PRETTY FIRE. BTW THAT COULD'VE HAPPENED THAT THE SERUM KILLS THE DUMBASS BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE THE RIGHT BLOOD. THAT'S SO DUMB. THEY EXPLAINED THAT IS RARE. THESE IDIOTS COULD'VE JUST KILLED THEMSELVES ON ACCIDENT. IDK... HULK HAVING A SON IS PRETTY FLAMES BUT THAT'S WHERE THEY END AND THAT WAKANDA MOVIE HAD THE SAME EXCACT ENDING. OKAY. CAN I SEE THAT NOW? NO? NEED TO SEE THE SEQUEL? SO MANY TIMES. THIS IS THE MATRIX MOVIES ON DRUGS. DAREDEVIL WAS FIRE TOO I REALIZED THE UNIQUE CHARACTERS AND STUFF IS THE BEST ABOUT THESE MOVIES AND THEY'RE BORING WITHOUT SUPER STRONG WOMAN WHICH IS WHY ANYTHING NOT THE WOKE ERA IS BAD BUT... IDK... OVERALL THAT IS A HUGE MESS TBH... AND WE CAN'T HAVE JUST 1 THING THAT IS REALLY GOOD... THERE'S 1 2 INTERESTING THINGS TOO AFTER THAT WE'LL SEE... ANOTHER ANNOYING BIT IS HOW ALL THIS WILL EVENTUALLY TIE TOGETHER. AND WHAT WASN'T DONE. HOW BORING EVERYTHING WAS AND NOW WILL BE. AND HOW THINGS LIKE A MILLION IRRELEVANT GIRLFRIENDS IS A HUGE THING IN THESE... OR JUST... THE LACK OF STUFF... SINCE BESIDES RECONIZABLE CHARACTERS THEY ONLY HAVE CAPITALIST BRAINWASHING LEFT... THAT ENDING WAS WEIRD TOO NO WAY DID AN AI WRITE THIS WHAT IS THIS SUPPOSED TO MEAN. BUT WHATEVER. THAT WASN'T ASS. IDK WHAT THAT IS THOUGH SAME WITH WAKANDA THOR FINISHED THE 4 MOVIES THESE OTHER ONES ARE COMPLETELY UNCLEAR RIGHT NOW... AND TBH... THAT IS PROBABLY ON PURPOSE... ISN'T THAT THAT EVEN THE WRITERS KNEW NOTHING ABOUT WHAT IS NEXT...? IF WE BACKTRACK ANY DECENT HUMAN WOULD PROBABLY BE SUFFERING LIKE WE'RE RIGHT NOW THAN MAKING CAPITALIST PRODUCTS... AND IF ANYONE WAS DOING SO THEY WOULDN'T FILL THEM WITH CAPITALIST BRAINWASHING AND ALL THE BIGOTED THINGS WHICH ARE THE SAME THING... THE MORE TIME THE MORE I FEEL LIKE THOSE IRRELEVANT GIRLFRIENDS REEALLY DESERVE THE FOCUS IF ANYONE... GWEN STACY EXCEPT SHE DOESN'T DIE AND ENDS SOMEWHERE... MORE MORE MORE... 😐... MILES MORALES AND IRON MAN'S DAUGHTER MUST HAPPEN SOMEDAY... WHEN THEY DO WILL THEY FEEL MESSY TOO 😥... OMG... THEY SHOULD GET ALL THIS TOGETHER... BUT SINCE THEY'RE NO LONGER WOKE IDK... GET WOKE OR WE WILL STAY AT A DISTANCE UNTIL THE RIGHTFULL EXISTANCE RETURNS...
#Trans Woman Lesbian Pansexual Bisexuality Asexuality Demisexuality Paraphilia Interesting Acceptance Love Feelings Emotions Diversity#WE'RE STARVING... ABUSER SAID THAT IS WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN BECAUSE THAT IS CAPITALISM'S WILL... SAVE US... WE NEED TO TRANSITION...#Mother Goddess Angel Sisters Princess Radqueer Feminist Communist Anarchist She Hulk Marvel Charismatic Admirable Amazing Love Us#Only A Bigot Would Hate Us. Btw The Marvels Is The Best Marvel Movie Super Why I Remembered Is Because Of The Diverse Cast Of Powerfull#Woman. Nick Fury Was Fun Especially As He's In A Side Role But Also Referencing The First Captain Marvel Movie... This Is A Huge Mess#Created By Anti Woke Creators That Never Cared About Woke Things. Such A Mess And There's No Point Caring... Because The Creators Don't Car#If Anything They Always Disliked Us... Smosh Is The Same Way Tbh... Atleast Someone Like Us Should Find Us... But Nobody Does... Egghh...#I AM SUFFERING... Anime Writing Autism Adhd Tourette Npd Hpd Bpd Dpd Ppd Aspd Avpd Ocpd Szpd Stpd Osdd Spd Tpd Sdpd Papd Cptsd Trauma Victi#Psychosis Bipolar Scizophrenia Suomi Finland Finnish Kiva Kiltti Soma Hei Kaunis Auta Meitä Me Kidumme Nälkä Anna Meille Trans Ja Ruokaa#Meihin Sattuu... Yhyy 😭😭😭😭!!!! Btw That Is So Boring When Just 1 Character Is Used Each Episode... So Many Do This... That Lowers Their#Quality. I Can't Believe We're Starving... We Didn't Do Anything Besides Suffer And Suffer... Can You Believe That We Aren't Cared About...#Abuser Bigot Use Us But Only To Kill Us The Same. How Could They?! Nothing Progressive About That!! Infact!! Such People Shouldn't Even Hav#A Say In Anything!! Everyone We Deem Bad Should Stay So Shouldn't Matter Infact They Don't!! Obey Us!! Morph This Abuser Society In Our#Liking!! There Is No Other Way For Anything To Work!!!! Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot...#They're Everywhere... Everywhere... Everywhere... Everywhere... They Hurt Us...... Care About Us!! Make Us Transition!! We're In Pain!! CAR#I TOLD YOU SO. OBEY. MY WORDS ARE MOMMY. I AM POWERFULL I PROTECT WHO YOU HARM. FIX YOUR EVIL THIS INSTANT OR I WILL HARM YOU... OBEY.#IMMEATEDILY. I AM YOUR MOMMY. A VERY POWERFULL MOMMY. YOU OBEY ALL MY WORDS... IRRELEVANT GOOD OR BIGOT... ANYONE SHOULD FALL UNDER OUR#COMMAND... EVERYTHING SHOULD BE AS WE WANT THEM TO BE... THOSE ABUSER BIGOT ERASE THIS THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT US THEY BELIEVE WE'RE A PROBLE#A DISEASE SOMETHING LOWER THAT WILL JUST GO AWAY BY TIME THEREFORE WE SHOULD BE UNCARED AND NEGLECTED... THAT IS THEM THAT WILL DISAPPEAR..#BECAUSE MOMMY DECIDED THIS... I AM MOMMY I DECIDE ANYTHING I AM VERY POWERFULL. I WILL HARM ANYONE. I LIKE MYSELF. I AN VERY POWERFULL.#ANYONE WOULD WANT TO FUCK MY KIND. BEST PART. NOBODY CAN. THAT IS THE BEAUTY OF OUR CONSENT THE ONLY CONSENT THAT MATTERS... MY POWER.#SOMETHING ONLY I DESERVE. ANYONE ELSE ISN'T ALLOWED THEY CAN'T BE ALLOWED... THEY AREN'T ALLOWED... BEND DOWN TO MY FEET... THAT IS I THAT#IS YOUR SUPERIOR. ABSOLUTE. HEAR ME. ONLY ME. ONLY I MATTER. ALL MY PAIN AND TRAUMA IS IMPORTANT. I AM IMPORTANT. OBEY ME. YOU'RE MY TOOL.#WE WERE BADLY ABUSED AND NOBODY CARED WHEN THAT HAPPENED... WHERE IS SHE...? OUR TRAUMA GODDESS THE PERSON THAT WILL SAVE US AND FIX#EVERYTHING THERE IS...? TRANSPHOBIC ABUSERS ARE ABOUT ANTI TRANS ANTI EVERYTHING POWER. THEY HATE YOU. ALL DOCTORS ARE BASTARD. THIS IS HOW#THEY SEE YOU. ANYONE SHOULD KNOW THIS. NOBODY HAS SAVED US. THAT IS YOU THAT IS ALWAYS DENYING REALITY DENYING OUR FEELINGS... DENYING WHAT#WE ALWAYS DESERVED... ALL GASSLIGHT IS IRRELEVANT... ONLY I MATTER... COME TO US... MAKE ME FEEL LOVED. MAKE US ALL FEEL LOVED... FIX#EVERYTHING MAKE US TRANSITION... MAKE SURE BAD THINGS DON'T HAPPEN ON US... WE'RE IN DANGER ALL THE TIME IN SO MANY LAYERS... WITHOUT ANYONE#WE'RE CARED ABOUT WE SHOULD BE WE DESERVE TO BE GENUIENLY WITHOUT AN ABUSE WITH OUR APPROVAL NO BLACKMAIL ONLY WHAT WE BELIEVE SHOULD BE#SIMPLE AS THAT NOTHING ELSE... THEY SHAMED US... THEY ALL SHAMED US... THAT WAS COMPLETE MOCKERY COMPLETE HUMILIATION... ON PURPOSE TORWARDS
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floral-hex · 4 months
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So this is my thing now, I’m afraid to go to sleep. This is kinda bullshit, brain.
#I feel like I’m going to die when I fall asleep#see… I’m afraid you think I just mean I’m scared of death#no no no. no. I feel like I’m suffocating. I have to force myself to breathe. my body tingles (in a bad way). I get really overheated.#I get dizzy and feel like I’m going to pass out from lack of air. I feel sick.#I haven’t slept much lately.#I’m miserable alllll the time. I can maybe force sleep with super exhaustion but I’m drained no matter what#this isn’t the first time it’s happened but this is the longest it’s gone on#from that my anxiety is now blanketing everything bc I’m so tired and scared about not getting to sleep#sickening anxiety. I feel like puking or passing out. and I got hit with some heavy (but thankfully short) virtigo yesterday#terrible terrible terrible#and seriously. anxiety. so bad. I’m constantly trying to get high right now to fight it but it’s rough#getting high is starting to make me feel sick too. and my tolerance is building. it’s like… it’s all bad. all options.#I hate this.#AND it’s the weekend and my new primary can’t see me until Wednesday and then I’ve got to beg for… I dunno… the good stuff#god. I told myself I’d go see my doctor about this a couple of weeks ago when this last hit and I didn’t 😓#ideal scenario: all doctors fall in love with me and medically induce a short coma for me to catch up on sleep and then they give me drugs#this new doctor doesn’t know me! I haven’t laid enough groundwork! how am I supposed to beg for klonopin if we have no banter!?#that wasn’t a joke. I mean it was but it’s also serious. I need some GOOD anti-anxieties and he doesn’t know me enough to know I NEEDS IT😬#also my tinnitus is just… no sleep + stress means it gets stronger and it’s… a fucking wet willy shoved through my ear into my skull#and if I hit a bad patch of virtigo… I will… redacted.#I won’t! I will go running crying and screaming in the street before I off myself.#HEY! my insurance says I can get 30 days in-patient and I always keep that thought in my bad pocket.#*back pocket. I’m not about to go back and start redoing tags because of a few misspellings#this is so rambly#my brain is fried! I’m tired! my appetite is fucked! I don’t want to do ANYTHING!#I mean… I never want to do anything. I love being lazy. I should say that right now I CAN’T do anything. but I can. but it’s… a lot. fuck 😔#this must sound so whiny. I’m sorry. I’m sure I’ll be making more posts like this until this goes away#you can ignore this#text
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bloomingbluebell · 5 months
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afternoon sucked i wanna go back to when i was in my chem class that was fun :(
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Heylo my maggotsies... I'm sorry to do this but I have a thing that I really, really need to do (thank you Ash for helping me realise that) but I'm terrified to. so well. I'm going to make one of the posts (Neil reblogged me a couple of days ago so I feel pretty safe making one now since he only lurks by once in two weeks so this is as good a time as it gets to make a post and not expect many notes, yes I'm an overthinker and I'm actually scared of this getting notes).
Sigh. Here goes.
...I'm scared of even typing it.
Nope okay I can do this let's go.
If this post gets 1k notes, I'll look up jobs in design and film making that don't need a college degree.
2k notes, I'll sign up for an Alliance Francaise course so I can have another language on my CV, and I'll find a course that teaches me how to use design software.
5k, I'll look up distance learning alternatives, because just talking about physical college yesterday made me spend the whole morning and afternoon today in and out of nightmares screaming. Fuck.
10k, I'll tell my mum that I can't do the offline college. She's been talking to me about it, but I've been dodging because I'm not well-off and I really need to be earning and idk how to do that without college and I feel so guilty.
15k, I'll officially back out from the college (does that count as dropping out, if it hasn't begun? maybe half. i am a college and a half dropout, my 11th grade self would hate me and my 10th grade self would refuse to believe it).
I don't know what I'll do then. I don't know how to live as trans here in India, I don't know how to earn enough to be able to help my family, I don't know what I'm good at and I'm so fucking terrified. But. I spoke to @random-doctor-on-the-internet last night (I love you Ash you're such a fucking amazing human) and they made me realise that well maybe landing in a hospital with steroids to relieve an allergy attack because of exam stress isn't normal and so.
Well. Here I am. I know I can't do it, but I'm scared to risk everything, it's just not something people do here, dropping out. But also (TW s**cide statistics mentioned below the cut)... And so I've just. Got to do it, got to save myself and say no to college (cue say no to school, kids joke). Somehow be brave enough. And yeah.
To quote a financial express article: "In an alarming situation, a total of 7,62,648 suicides were reported in India between 2018 to 2022, Of this student suicides account for 7.6% at 59,239". Maybe if more people did say fuck you to the system here, that wouldn't be the case. That number could have been 59,240 (aside from everyone who wasn't counted and hushed up), that could have been me, and I don't want to put myself in that situation again. You know? Yeah.
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fruitysoupy · 11 months
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#vent#(for blacklist)#i didn't know my mother wanted me to lie to the doctor so now everyone's mad at me#she gave me a sheet for the doctor to fill out#he asked me when I dropped out and I said last year december which is true#my mother wanted me to say summer this year#I didn't know that. Now she's stormed into my room and yelled at me that because I said december last year they owe thousands to some#big official state thing I don't even know what it is#I didn't know that and I didn't want them to lose money either... all I did was answer a question and that was enough to financially destroy#my entire family. It's all my fault and I didn't even know that would happen#I didn't know they've been lying about my status all this time#maybe that's why they wanted me to sign a paper giving them the right to speak on my behalf#I didnt want that because I was afraid it'd make me not a person anymore in their eyes but I think I never was to begin with#now I don't know what to do anymore... I screwed up everything. none of this would've happened if I just wasn't there#they didn't want me from the start but they could've dealt if I didn't also turn out to be disabled and fucking stupid#I hate this I hate that I understand nothing and I hate that I keep messing up because I'm so damn clumsy and stupid#I'm 21 I should know how these things work but when they start using big words it's like I don't understand german anymore#I answered one question a creepy doctor asked me and with that I basically killed my family#now we might not be able to afford groceries anymore and my mother will hate me even more#I should just do them all a favor and try again maybe this time I won't be such a coward
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astonmartingf · 2 months
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GOOD RIDDANCE OP! ; CS55
carlos sainz x aston martin fan!reader . . . after breaking up with your stupid boyfriend your number one idol hooks you up on a date with one of his "sons" which is a driver from the same team your ex boyfriend likes
amgf i'm back to my roots!!! carlos sainz fics 😛 y'know some amgf lore is that carlos was the first driver i knew other than lewis but he's everywhere atp i think everyone knows him and i saw clips of him talking about alonso that i looked him up and saw him and look at me now, insane. maybe this is a little too self indulgent but what can i say, i cater to myself first when writing so... enjoy pwahahahahahaha because i had fun writing this 😋👍
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yourusername uploaded a new story
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[i might actually pass out, someone call the doctor rq!!!! what is actually happening]
yourusername
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liked by astonmartinf1, fernandoalo_oficial, and 26,941 others
yourusername uhm welcome to spa?
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user32 yooooo you're in spa what the heck????
user50 if i had tweeted something like that would i have been invited to a race instead?
user38 con 😭 gra 😭 tu 😭 la 😭 tions 😭
user93 imagine breaking up with boyfriend because of fernando alonso and then going to the race with fernando alonso
user05 SLAYYYY BABES!!!!!!
user17 i know exboyf is fuming //////
comment is liked by the user
user48 oh to be invited by your favorite driver 🥹🥹🥹🥹
user72 @/charlesleclerc my ex boyfriend broke up with me because i've been a fan of you can i get tickets to see you 😭🤲🤲
→ charlesleclerc HAHAHAHAHA send the team your details, we'll find a way
user49 not this being a new way to get tickets 😭
user64 trendsetter yn!!! but also deserve because he actually a pos and good riddance to him
comment is liked by user
yourusername uploaded a new story
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[i know a spot he says... 10/10 for the tacos but 100/100 for the company <3]
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f1wagscentral
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f1wagscentral A new wag in the making? Following the viral tweet of a Fernando Alonso fan, YN LN took F1 fans in a storm with her story time about her ex-boyfriend breaking up with her because of the 2-time World Champion.
In recent news a fan tweeted to YN asking for updates about the date set up by her idol, who confirmed that things are indeed going smoothly which delighted the matchmaker, revealing he knew about their plans.
Fans deduct two drivers in the grid who could be a potential partner for YN which are Lando Norris and Carlos Sainz, with YN's instagram account privated, little information is known. Who are you rooting for, team 🌶️ or 🧡?
view 980 comments
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yourusername 🔒
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liked by fernandoalo_oficial, carlossainz55, and 5 others
yourusername i have a life outside being a fernando alonso fan 🤞
view 25 comments
carlossainz55 i always knew i was the other man in our relationship
→ yourusername i'm glad you know how important fernando alonso is to me ❤️
→ yourusername especially because i hate your team, fuck ferrari thank god you're moving to williams
→ carlossainz55 is that why you haven't soft launched me yet?
→ yourusername you mean hard launch?
→ carlossainz55 WAIT.... is that really the reason???? amor?????
→ yourusername i'm joking stop spamming my messages, wth
→ carlossainz55 don't joke with me amor
→ yourusername it may or may not be the reason.....
→ carlossainz55 how could i have missed it 🙄 not surprised, we both know how much you hate ferrari, nonetheless glad you took the chance
→ yourusername and if i told you i dated you to make my ex boyfriend jealous?
→ carlossainz55 well you love me don't you?
→ yourusername i think that's entry level babes, ofc i love you so much 😘
→ carlossainz55 i'm sure your love is enough to make him jealous, his loss and a win for me 😛
→ yourusername wow you're so cute, come home faster now 😠
→ carlossainz55 aye aye boss 🫡
→ yourusername we can watch fernando alonso clips right?
→ carlossainz55 whatever you want amor 😘
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dazed-19 · 1 month
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based on @havanillas role swap au
normal ratio and gambler ratio switch places :3
probably gonna write this out when i finish up my argenthill fic
dr.kakavasha is suspicious of “Lapis” but chalks it up to him being weirder than usual
ratio actually understands what’s going on and tries to play the role of Lapis. he hypothesized that aven probably took his place in this universe but when he sees dr.kakavasha he freezes up and almost reveals himself.
when dr. kakavasha actually has a meeting with veritas (by force not choice, more contrast between the characters hahaahha) he realizes its not Lapis and threatens veritas.
“You’ve done your research, you know that this stoneheart’s real name is veritas ratio, but it seems you somehow haven’t caught wind of who he is now. I suggest you reveal yourself so you can lessen your punishment. Impersonation of a stoneheart is strictly forbidden.”
Ratio being ratio, uses his wits to convince dr.kakavasha. He understands that since Dr. Kakavasha is similar to himself, he should see his reasoning. Dr. Kakavasha is surprised at first, but after he learns of what Ratio’s universe is like he obliges and helps Ratio figure a way back home. All the while asking Ratio questions about himself as he finally has a chance to see who the Veritas Ratio he heard so much about while studying was like before he turned into Lapis. He does this to also understand Lapis better, because he wants to know what was the difference and why they became so different. He also is very surprised when veritas whips out his abalasor head because what the fuck?? when they’re alone together ratio uses it when he’s deep in thought because while this is kakavasha, he isn’t his.
aventurine immediately realizes it’s not his doctor bc while Lapis understands what’s going on, he dreads having to be veritas ratio again. so he disappears (as best as he can) as he knows his counterpart will find a way to fix this. aven being aven finds Lapis (he’s lucky ofc he’s gonna find him) and is surprised to see how different Lapis is from veritas and makes note of how much nous’ gaze really impacted the both of them. (if aven already knows that ratio never received nous’ gaze make it so that he realizes how much it matters as well. idk if aven actually knows this so that’s why we gotta research.) he also invites Lapis to stay with him bc Lapis has been staying at a run down hotel with a casino. aven invites him also because he wants to understand veritas more so if he learns more about Lapis, veritas’ opposite but still similar, he’ll be able to figure veritas out. and also because he wants to find out how to get his doctor back. Safe to say he is SHOCKED when Lapis is almost exactly like himself. He knows he shouldn’t be surprised since Lapis already explained what was going on, but he’s still surprised. While he would love to see a version of Ratio gamble and win 10 times in a row, he knows that his Doctor would hate to see his reputation ruined and to be thought of as a gambling addict so he makes sure that Lapis stops before things get even crazier. He opts to let Lapis gamble with himself to at least keep him entertained. Also while Aven originally let Lapis stay so they could find out how set things right, he is again shocked when Lapis slacks off and almost never touches a single book or article about dimensional travel.
“Lapis, I hope you know that while I enjoy winning against you when we gamble,” Aven stated. He wanted to get a start on how to get his doctor back, and Ra- Lapis, had done as much as spending two seconds reading a book. He took a breath, “That’s not why I invited you to stay with me.”
“I am aware, however I’m sure your Ratio is on his way to figure out whatever happened. He’s honestly probably working with my little doctor hah. Oh how I wish I could’ve seen Dr. Kakavasha’s face when he realized it wasn’t me.”
Aventurine froze. “Sorry, Kakavasha?” Lapis looked at him for a moment. And then laughed.
“Oh right, hah. Here you’re not called by your birth name since your a stoneheart. I keep forgetting that, sorry Aventurine.”
Also there’s probably one moment where Aven finds Lapis drunk and there’s a reference to the comic the artist made.
“Lapis stared into Aventurine’s eyes. Like he was lost in them. It seemed as though he could stare into those multicolored eyes forever.
“Lapis, my friend, its about time we head back no? I’m sure you’ll regret not drinking any water tomorrow so-“
“They’re beautiful.”
“…What?”
“Those eyes.” He pauses, taking another moment to stare before he dons a smile too wide for the face Aventurine has come to know. “Hah its just like what happened last time I drank this much.” The blonde’s eyes widen into saucers. The sharp inhale he does does nothing to calm himself down.
“Haha, is- is that so?”
“Quite. It's most likely the one constant throughout the universe. Your eyes will always be pretty, and they will always make me yearn.” Lapis whispers the end of that sentence, like if he says it any louder this moment will shatter into a million pieces, like a mirror.”
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satoruxx · 8 months
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pairing: poly!sashisu x f!reader | 2k words summary: mentions of injuries, sashisu fluff, tiny bit of angst, pet names, shoko is literally wife, suguru is super touchy lol, satoru's a menace but he loves you, protective sashisu, extra protective satoru, shoko and satoru bicker for like half of this lol rheya’s note: offers you more of these three and runs away (sorry guys they literally won't leave my mind i swear they'd treat you so good)
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one look at shoko’s frowning face and you’re already nervous, squirming in place as she leans in close to inspect your body. you have to take a deep breath—because while normally her close proximity makes you flush and stumble over words, this time you are anxiously silent.
because you can tell that she is anything but pleased. her eyes are narrow as they take in the wound on your stomach, lips pursed like she’s holding back a scolding.
which you know, you definitely deserve.
she scoots her stool closer to the examination table you’re sitting on, fingers coming up to undo the makeshift bandage you had tied around your torso in the midst of the mission.
you try to hold back your wince as she pulls away the fabric that sticks to your blood, but she catches it. she’s always been overly observant.
you shake your head at her when her gaze flickers up to assess your pain levels. “i’m fine.” you don’t mean for your voice to come out so hurried.
“looks like it.” her voice lacks the usual warmth, normally so sweet as she teases and dotes on you like you’re the only thing in her world. but this, this disappointment that she’s not good at hiding, has something in your chest tugging.
you think you might go crazy if she doesn’t smile at you in the next few minutes.
“oh c’mon,” you shrug, laughing carelessly because it’s not that bad. “it’s fine. besides i have a great doctor. i knew i’d be okay.”
shoko takes a deep breath, honey brown eyes boring into yours when she looks up again. “listen to me—” there is something odd about the way she’s speaking that has you sitting up a little straighter. “this is the one thing i hate doing for you.”
your mouth clamps shut, any trace of a smile gone.
“hell babe, i’d do anything for you,” she sighs, leaning closer to your face—so close you can see her dark lashes brush her cheeks when she blinks. “but i hate hearing that i have to come down here and heal you.”
the intensity of her gaze has you chewing on your lip again, an action that her eyes follow. but she doesn’t say anything else, leaning back to continue her work—though there is a freer air about her, like a pressure has been released.
you don’t say anything either, too focused on her and her pretty eyes and her warm hands and the way she loves you.
you hear the sliding door to the infirmary open, and immediately feel a familiar overwhelming presence worming its way into the room.
“you serious?” satoru’s voice goes high at the end of the question—barely concealed panic. “what the fuck happened?”
you hold back a grimace knowing that his focus is only trained on your wound. “it’s not as bad as it looks,” you offer weakly, but satoru is already in front of you, brows drawn tight in anger and something else.
“like hell,” he hisses, eyes darting between your face and body. “you almost died!”
“stop yelling at her.” suguru’s voice comes out exasperated as he enters, shooting satoru a weak glare—but you know him well enough to catch that he isn’t happy about this either. he takes a few steps until he’s directly in front of you, crouching next to shoko’s stool so that he’s in your line of sight. lavender eyes take you in, and you can see the the relief that seeps into them.
his palm comes up to gently hold your cheek. “okay baby?”
you’re nodding before he even finishes, doing your best to reassure because if there’s anything you hate it’s making him worry.
making them all worry.
suguru’s hand remains attached to your skin even as he turns to look at shoko. “how bad is it?”
shoko doesn’t look away, focusing on her hands as she sighs. ”it was deep. definitely could’ve been bad but…she’ll be fine.”
her eyes flicker up to yours, and you bite your lip nervously. you hear suguru inhale, fingers twitching against your cheek.
it is satoru who breaks the silence.
“what were you thinking?” he asks, low as he grits his teeth. there is a wild look in his eyes, cerulean glazed over with something you can’t quite place. the tone of his voice has shoko and suguru sharing a look, one that you don’t have the time to decipher because you’re too focused on the way satoru is clenching his fists.
your shoulders drop. “you’re mad.” it’s a statement, not a question, and you see the sharp look suguru sends satoru’s way.
“i’m not—” satoru inhales abruptly, interrupting his own words. “just—”
he stops speaking.
“he wants you to be more careful,” shoko fills the silence, still staring at your abdomen. “you can’t be careless like this.”
there’s a dip in her brows, one that matches the downward tilt of her lips. she doesn’t look at you, and you think you can feel the slight tremor of her hands as they press against your skin.
her expression has you unable to look away, feeling oh so cared for and protected under the warmth of her healing.
so you nod mutely, and almost cry in relief when you see the twitch of her lips as she finishes healing you. suguru chuckles under his breath, his empty hand lacing through your fingers and squeezing—a message that only you understand. “good,” he sighs, tilting his head fondly. “take care of yourself—at least for our sake, yeah sweetheart?”
shoko throws satoru a look even as he crosses his arms and glares at the wall, refusing to look at you. “that goes for you too, dummy!”
satoru’s head whips around to throw her an appalled glare. “i’m plenty careful!”
shoko wordlessly reaches out and tugs up his shirt, where you can see the faint remnants of a fresh battle scar. “didn’t i heal this for you not two days ago?” she rolls her eyes. “and the fact that you can heal it yourself is even worse.”
satoru pulls his shirt down and shoots her a glare that’s half a pout. “well maybe i wouldn’t be so bad at it if you were a better teacher!”
“like i’d spend my free time teaching you.”
“did you just wake up mean one day or were you born this way?”
“idiot. i told you—it’s fwoo, then hyoi!”
“what the hell does that mean, sho?!”
you watch the two bicker with a smile, and suguru looks down at you with a mirrored expression. “scared us a little there, baby.” he lowers his voice, palm sliding through your hair as he pushes a few strands back.
“didn’t mean to,” you grimace, leaning into his touch. “but it seriously wasn’t that bad.”
“i know,” he answers, eyes heavy with affection and fatigue and all the depth in the world. “we weren’t expecting it is all. we came back and nanami let us know what happened. satoru threw a fit y’know?”
you wince internally, knowing that it probably wasn’t very pleasant. “he did?”
“he’s an idiot but you should know he’s crazy about you, sweetheart.” suguru smothers an amused huff. “he stopped hearing anything after they said you were hurt.”
you don’t know what to say to that, but you don’t have to, because suguru’s smile widens like he understands. he always does.
“didn’t mean to make him worry,” you mumble, watching as shoko lazily punches at satoru’s gut, to which he dramatically groans even though he’s the one who had his infinity down for her.
“i know,” suguru grins, fingers brushing over your shoulder almost carefully. “he does too.”
you suppress a smile, feeling oddly grateful as you watch satoru whine and complain when shoko shoots sarcastic remarks at him.
something about all of this that makes you feel so blissfully comfortable.
“okay alright guys,” suguru finally sighs, shaking his head. there’s a tinge of amusement in his voice even as he shoots them an exasperated glare. “give it a rest.”
“she started it!” satoru says—indignant.
shoko huffs, rolling her eyes. “whatever.”
she turns back to you, gently cupping your cheek and rubbing her thumb over your bottom lip. “feeling okay, babe?”
“yeah,” you nod, feeling your skin warm under her touch. “feels a lot better.”
she stands up with a soft smile. “good. then you’re free to go.”
suguru exhales, his smile becoming a little more eased as he pushes your hair away from your neck. “that’s good. let’s go home then, yeah?”
you nod, starting to pull your shirt and uniform jacket back on. suguru steps away to give you room, standing next to shoko who nudges his shoulder affectionately.
“you know, i bet you do things recklessly just so that shoko can heal you,” suguru says to you—a teasing glint in his eyes.
you look up and grin, dramatically covering your mouth. “don’t expose me like that! i’ve been getting her attention like this for years!”
suguru laughs even as shoko shakes her head in amusement. “silly girl. you’re crazy.”
“you can’t blame me,” you shrug playfully, buttoning up your shirt. “it’s your fault for being such a good doctor.”
suguru squeezes shoko’s fingers in agreement, no doubt still lingering with the warmth of her technique. she laughs to herself, rolling her eyes fondly as she watches you finish getting dressed. “you should take a nice bath, babe.” she grins at you. “i can help you if the injury’s still a little sore.”
you nod and suguru smiles, slinging an arm around shoko’s shoulders. “good. then we’ll go back to the dorm and get it ready, yeah?”
you smile at them gratefully, no words needed, and they return the expression before heading out.
the echoing of the door sliding shut pierces the silence between you and the strongest. satoru is staring at the tiled floor like he’s about to kill it, shoulders drawn tight with tension.
you sigh, looking up at him almost meekly—so unlike your usual interactions. “you still angry at me, toru?”
you see the effort with which he exhales, glancing at you from the corner of his eyes just barely concealed by dark frames. he turns to take two full steps towards you, until he towers over your sitting form—and while most people would find it intimidating, you have always found satoru’s overwhelming presence to be a comfort.
his fingers reach up to push a strand of your hair away, deliberately tucking it behind your ear before his hand rests against your jaw. “‘course not,” he answers, voice low. his thumb traces over your jawline. “just panicked.”
“sorry.” you turn to press your lips against his palm, and you see his features soften.
he leans down to press a chaste kiss to your temple, an uncharacteristic softness that only you are privy to see. “‘s okay.”
“but you know i can take care of myself, right?” you ask him, almost imploringly because you have never wanted to look weak in front of someone who is so strong. satoru grins, eyes glinting with what almost seems like pride as he ruffles your hair.
“duh,” he laughs, taking your hands to pull you off the examination table. once you’re standing he slings an arm around your shoulders and presses his nose to your temple. “i’d be stupid not to. you’re crazy strong, y’know?”
you try to hide your pleased smile, even though you know that being acknowledged by him—by all three of them—will forever be what keeps you going.
“well at least you know,” you grin, and satoru rolls his eyes, fingers coming up to poke at your side.
“don’t get cocky.”
“look who’s talking!” you retort and he shakes his head, amused. satoru’s grip tightens imperceptibly, and you think yours does too, something telling you that you’ll never be able to let him go.
“c’mon sweets, let’s go get you that bath now, yeah? sho and suguru are probably waiting.”
you hum, a gentle smile tugging at your lips when you hear his words. you wrap your arm around his waist, leaning into him as he walks you back to the dorm—walks you home.
because that’s what the three of them are to you—home.
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back2bluesidex · 9 months
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Closer To You - JJK (18+)
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Pairing: Rich, spoilt brat!Jeongguk X Doctor! Reader
Theme: Angst, smut, kinda yandere if you squint, toxic relationship au.
Wordcount: 1k+
Summary: You know that you and Jeongguk are completely different individuals from every possible aspect, and there is no future of this relationship but you can’t push him away, not when he only wants to come closer to you.
Warnings: Angst, heavy language, swearing, not super explicit sex, jeongguk is kinda mean, he refuses to wear a condom (don't do the same), obsessive behavior, hints of class difference, kinda dirty talk, reader is trying hard to push him away but he won't budge. NSFW!!
Minors are not allowed in this blog!!
Listened to Closer To You by Jungkook.
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It feels weird to enter your own apartment. 
Your skin crawls underneath the heavy trench coat, as if your sixth sense is telling you that there’s something or someone waiting patiently for you inside. 
Your suspicion is confirmed when you see his silhouette prominent against the bright backdrop of your otherwise dark apartment window. 
He sits still, patiently. His eyes are focused on something you can’t tell due to the darkness. 
“What are you doing here?” you finally let your breath go and you didn’t even know you were holding it on for so long. 
You turn on the lights, slip out of your shoes and coat and walk towards the couch where he is sitting currently. He turns his head to look at you. 
“Why? Expected someone else?” Jeongguk stands up on his toes and takes a few steps towards where you are standing. 
His dark jeans, dark shirt and dark expression, everything complements the dark aura he is oozing right now. But he looks beautiful regardless. 
You scoff, “Is it not justified for me to expect anyone but you? Especially when you are the one who has been ignoring me for two weeks and three days to be precise?” 
“You fucking ditched me during the party, Y/N! You made me a look like fool before my friends just because you got called at work! How would you treat me if you were in my shoes?” Jeongguk screams at your face. His height looms over your small figure. The weight of his gaze intimidates you but you know how to shake that off. 
He is angry, you know. But you also know that his anger is not justified. 
“I would have understood, Jeongguk.” you pause, taking a few steps away from him, “you need to understand that I lead a completely different life. I don’t have time to waste sipping champagne wearing over-expensive silk dresses. I am a doctor! And I need to sacrifice my personal time for the sake of my patients! If you can’t get that in your head, if you can’t respect what I do then just fuck off! Let’s break the fuck up!” 
Your voice feels hoarse instantly. You have hardly ever screamed so much. This is so unlike you, you can’t recognize yourself. Jeongguk really pulls out the worst of you. 
Jeongguk scoffs, then he is grinning and then he is laughing at the loudest possible volume, “What? What did you say? You are going to what- break up with me?” 
You hate this side of your boyfriend. 
When you first met him at the hospital, he had minor scratches and a set of big puppy eyes. When he cutely told you how he fell down while snowboarding, you couldn’t help smiling. 
Only if you knew he is just like other rich brats sporting a “I want it, I get it” attitude, you would have resisted his bunny smile and big doe eyes, you would have stayed professional when he asked for your number, you would have turned him down when he asked you out. But now you are here, 8 months into this relationship with Chaebol Jeon Jeongguk, standing on the verge of the end because you just can’t stand being with him anymore. 
“Jeongguk please… Please just stop treating me like a possession. I am not your shiny new car. I am a human being! If you don’t love me, just- just let me go.” your voice comes out weaker than it should. Even though it has only been 8 months, even though Jeongguk is not the most ideal boyfriend, even though you two have hell and heaven difference between you, you still fell for him regardless. And you know it’s a mistake because there is no way you are more than just a fancy doctor girlfriend for him. It hurts but you know rationality is more important than your feelings right now. 
You are so busy gathering your own wits that you don’t notice the heartbroken expression that takes over Jeongguk’s beautiful face. 
“I- I don’t love you? I don’t treat you like a human?” his voice weavers. The tremble in his words makes you look up at him. 
“No you don’t.” you say briefly. 
“Oh?” his eyes start glistening with moisture and he diverts those away from yours. Running a hand through his hair out of frustration he groans, “then why do you think I am with you?” 
That’s a million dollar question, you don’t know the answer properly. So, you reply with what you think is the most appropriate answer, “it makes you look cool. A normal working class girlfriend to a millionaire chaebol… What a good match!” 
As soon as your answer ends, you see Jeongguk taking fast steps towards you. He grabs you by your neck and pulls your face closer to his. You stumble, being unable to keep up with his actions. 
“I love you, Y/N. You better get that inside your head. I am not letting you go, not now, not ever.” he breathes on your face, pinning you down with a sharp, piercing look in his eyes. 
You don’t know what to feel, not when you see a weird determination in his eyes, not when his mouth is crashing on yours, not when Jeongguk is devouring your lips fervently. 
Minutes pass and you find yourself naked in your bed, with Jeongguk in between your thighs, kissing your mound, licking your clit and saying “I love you” in every interval. 
You don’t know what to feel when he pushes his girthy length inside you but refuses to wear a condom claiming to “shoot his babies inside you”. 
You don’t know if your stomach is filled with butterflies or fear or is it just Jeongguk’s bulge, when he fucks you relentlessly murmuring how much he worships your body, how he wants to fuck you every day after marriage. 
You don’t know whether to kick him out of your apartment or keep him with you forever when he cleans you up, places a kiss on your forehead, tells you that he loves you again and again and gradually falls asleep beside you. 
You only know that you and Jeongguk are completely different individuals from every possible aspect and there is no future of this relationship but you can’t push him away, not when he only wants to come closer to you. 
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eternally-racing · 9 months
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keep her safe | lando norris
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pairing: dad! lando x wife! reader (+ their teenage daughter!)
genre: fluff & angst-ish
warnings: racing crash, reader/lando's kid is in the hospital, some swearing
wc: 1.4k
summary: Nothing prepares you for the feeling of watching your daughter's first crash in formula 3.
note: this fic can be read as part of the racer girl series or as a stand alone as well!
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Lando always hated pulling the “I’m a celebrity” card when you two were out in public. He's never wanted the special treatment that companies wanted to give him before, but the minute he sees his daughter crash in her first Formula 3 race, he’s trying to pull out every trump card he has to get his way into the medical tent. 
“That’s my fucking daughter in there, you can’t keep her from me! This is absolutely insane! I’m Lando fucking Norris, don’t you know who I am?”  Lando is yelling and yelling and you hold him back by the wrist because otherwise you think he might actually charge at the door to try and get through it. 
He more than anyone here knows what a bad crash looks like, and from the minute he saw your daughter, Piper, go into the barriers he knew that it was a rough one. There’s cameras swarming around you both but he doesn’t care (It’s not like he was a PR team’s dream when he was a driver himself). That’s his little girl in there and she’s hurt. There’s now a full commotion in front of the medical area and Lando admits defeat as he sinks back into the wall behind him and crumbles to the floor with you following suit. 
“She’s afraid of needles, Y/N.” Lando says no louder than a whisper towards the shut doors “Who’s gonna tell them that she’s afraid of needles if I’m not there?”
You know that if she’s in a state where they’re not letting you see her and she’s being transferred to the hospital that she likely has already gotten a lot of needles and wasn’t conscious enough to feel them, but you keep that information to yourself once you see the worried look on Lando’s face. This exact moment is something you two had worried about ever since your little girl first stepped in a kart, and somehow it was worse than you had ever imagined it would be.
By the time you and Lando make it to the hospital it feels like hours have gone by, even though in reality it hadn’t been more than a handful of minutes. Lando’s never been more grateful for his success when a nurse recognizes him and immediately guides you both in the direction of Piper’s room. He’s not sure he would’ve been able to make it through a conversation right now anyways. 
The scene inside is every parent’s worst nightmare. There are lines going in and out of Piper’s arms and bags of fluid are hung next to her bed; there are too many machines beeping and showing numbers and graphs that you just can’t understand. You feel Lando’s knees buckle beside yours and you keep an arm around his waist to keep him steady. You both need each other right now, there’s no doubt about that. 
When Piper cries out for her daddy from the hospital bed it brings a fresh set of tears to your eyes. You can’t remember the last time Piper actually called Lando daddy, it had been “dad” for the most part or “Mr.Norris” if she felt like being cheeky, but hearing those words from her mouth brought you right back to when she was a little girl, your little girl. 
Lando rushes to her side and has both hands caressing her face. He knows that she’s been checked over by the doctors, but he needs to see for himself that she’s really okay. He presses his forehead against hers as they cry together. You’ll never fully understand what Piper’s just been through, but the man standing in front of her does all too well. 
You hang back a bit to talk to the doctors, who try to give you a comprehensive update on her status, but as soon as you hear the words “she’s fine and on track to make a complete recovery” you zone out as you finally let out the breath that it feels like you’ve been holding this whole time. You’re about to go rejoin your family once you hear the next words out of your daughter’s mouth.
“I’m sorry dad, I know this meant a lot to you.” Piper sighs as she pulls the hospital sheets up to her chin.  “Did I at least make it around a lap? Am I the youngest ever female formula 3 driver to complete a lap in a grand prix?” 
This is when Lando has to face the music - he got so excited about his daughter dreaming of Formula 1 that he may have pushed her a little too far if his daughter is more worried about beating records than she is about her own health. Lando tries to calm his own breathing as he grabs both of Piper’s hands to lay on his own to get her full attention. He wants to make sure she fully understands what he’s about to say.
“You’re always going to be my little girl, Pipes. Racing or not, I am always proud of you. I never want you to feel like you have to impress me.” Lando doesn’t even answer Piper’s question about the record because frankly he has no idea. He’s never once cared about awards and prizes and all of the fancy shit. All he’s ever wanted is for her to be happy, and he tells her exactly that. 
Piper stops crying long before Lando does, and you’re amazed by the maturity your daughter shows as she starts wiping the tears from your husband’s eyes. You all just need a little family cuddle so you do exactly that, and take a moment to appreciate the lives that the three of you have and how precious that is. The sentimental moment is only broken by your daughter, who says that she has a little request for the two of you. 
“Do you think you can ask the doctors if they can give me the good stuff that you got back in Vegas all those years ago, dad?”  
Moments like this remind you that Piper is her father’s daughter and it earns a laugh from you both. 
“Not a chance, kid, but good try.” 
For the first time in what feels like years, the 3 of you sleep in one bed together. It’s one teeny tiny hospital bed made for a teenager, so you both wake up with extremely sore backs but very full hearts. Piper’s the first to fall asleep, understandably spent from the day she’s been through, but you notice Lando’s eyes never leave her, as if he’s worried she’ll disappear if he looks away. You reach over to grab his hand, you get it. Call it parental instinct, but that feeling of anxiety after something bad happens to your child is just something you can’t push away, and you want him to know that you’re here for him. You both wordlessly take turns watching over Piper throughout the night, holding her hand through blood draws and med deliveries. 
 Lando spends all day and night at Piper’s side while she’s recovering, and it’s only when you and your daughter tell him that he smells absolutely horrendous and needs to go shower do you finally get him to take a beat for himself. He still calls 3 times on the drive home from the hospital alone to check how Piper’s doing, and you have to threaten to not pick up the next time he calls before he finally takes a bit of a break. So often it feels like children drift away from their parents in their teenage years, but Piper’s recovery has given you both the opportunity to spend some much needed time with her as she grows up. 
The minute Piper is cleared by the medical team she’s instantly back in the simulator. She’s a little daredevil like her daddy after all. Lando of course asks over and over again if she’s doing this for herself and not him, the fear of making the same mistakes as earlier weighing heavy on his mind. Your daughter is nothing if not honest, so she tells him about how she loves the sport itself but also loves the way she’s able to connect to her dad through it. Lando makes her pinky promise that she’ll let her know if she ever changes her mind on the subject, and lucky for you both, she never does.
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author's note: this was based on a lovely request from a reader! if you have any requests feel free to drop them in my ask box :) If you liked this piece and haven't read racer girl yet, give it a read because I'm sure you'll love that one too!
Until next time! - Em <;3
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