#I need to stop picking on Aiden for a minute | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thebiggerbear · 1 year

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Only Ever Holding Onto You - Two - Near Miss

A/N: Hey all! Here is Chapter 2. I hope this is okay. Unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own. My beta was able to give me some notes but was unable to give it a full workup this time around so I apologize.

Song for the dance is In the Still Of the Night by The Five Satins. I couldn't stop listening to it while writing.

Warnings: Language (I guess?); them being idiots

Word Count: 7225

Series Taglist: @deans-spinster-witch; @rieleatiel

This chapter was recc'ed by @winchestergirl2 here.

Series Masterlist

Sighing, you stepped out of your car and glared at your destination: The Boot Heel Bar. You had no issue with the place but you were not exactly in the mood to socialize with your coworkers tonight, a certain ice princess named Hoyt specifically, but here you were. All because Beau urged you to come. You were an idiot and you swore that the man knew it, always utilizing this fact to his advantage and much to your detriment. You could never tell him no, not when he used that face and that tone, so after work you had gone home to change and now here you stood, scowling at the entrance to the local dive bar you all frequented.

You forced yourself to take a deep breath and remember that you only needed to play along nicely for the hour you planned to stay. You also rallied yourself with the thought that Beau owed you a few rounds since you picked up the tab the last time everyone met for a drink. You felt even more bolstered when you remembered that the cute and flirty bartender from last time might be working tonight and perhaps he’d buy you a shot like last time. Aiden — that was his name. That perked you right up and you made your way inside.

Music was blasting loudly from the corner where the jukebox was playing and the place was nearly packed. You scanned the large room and spotted the group of your coworkers surrounding a table in the back. One glance at the bar had you smiling when you saw the bartender you had been looking for. You snuck a peek at your group who hadn’t noticed your presence yet, and you made the decision to head straight to the bar first to get your drink. You didn’t do yourself up and change into this eye-catching outfit and killer heels for nothing.

You were just starting to slink over when you heard someone yell your name. You knew immediately who it was and you closed your eyes in defeat. Despite your best efforts, the group had seen you. After a moment of steeling yourself to face the people you had been trying to avoid for at least a few minutes, you spun around to find Beau making his way towards you, a huge grin on his face and a drink in his hand.

“Hey,” he greeted you happily. “You made it!” He gave you a one-armed hug and you couldn’t help but smile, happy to see him as well. You may not have been in the mood to see anyone else from the department tonight but you would always want to see your best friend.

Beau pulled back, giving you a once over. “Damn, darlin’, you are gorgeous.”

You gave him a playful swat on his chest, frowning. “Are you saying I’m not without all of this?”

“What? No,” he chuckled nervously. “No, what I meant was…you know…you’re more gorgeous than usual…right now… I don’t…” He gave up and took a sip of the drink he had, opting not to say any more that might get him in trouble.

“Calm down, slugger,” you laughed. “I’m just messing with you.” Seeing relief play out over his features, you gave him the once over. He had a nice button-up on with jeans and his usual boots. It also looked like he may have swung by the barber’s after work. “Not bad. You clean up pretty well, Arlen. You have a hot date tonight or what?”

A pink tint rose in his cheeks and it nearly made you laugh again. Beau Arlen was blushing, actually blushing. You knew all of that talk from him about men from Texas not blushing was absolute horseshit. But then you remembered who his hot date might be and you no longer felt like laughing. You hadn’t seen Hoyt at first glance around, but if Beau was here, she was guaranteed to be. This was her favorite bar after all, which she made sure to tell anyone who would listen ten times over the last night there had been a work get together, after she’d drank half the inventory of the place. Beau had ended up driving her home that night though both Cassie and Poppernak had offered. She had been barely able to walk so you could only imagine how elated she must have been when Beau must have needed to scoop her up in his arms and carry her to bed. The thought turned into a stone in the pit of your stomach; you did your best to ignore it.

“Not a hot date really. Well, it’s not a date.” You arched your brows in surprise, not expecting him to finally admit what had fast become an unspoken truth around the department at this point, the whole town really. Even Denise was taking bets on when Beau and Hoyt would officially come out as a couple. Cassie kept quiet each time Denise mentioned it, but you knew she did that out of respect for you, knowing how you and the blonde couldn’t stand one another and all.

Beau, seeing your reaction, began to panic. “No, what I mean is, she’s hot. No, I mean she is but not the date. But there is no date. I don’t…God help me,” he finished in a groan. He then sucked more alcohol down, opting to stay quiet again.

And there it was. Exactly what had been the strain between you both for the past six months, everything you had been fighting about. It felt like you had been sucker-punched though you knew it had been coming. You stared at your best friend, really looking at him, and a feeling of sadness overtook you for a moment. He deserved so much better, he was such a good man, and yet here he was, willingly throwing himself into the lion’s open mouth to be devoured. You hadn’t had the urge to pray in the longest time, but you were pretty close right now to starting up again. The only silver lining was that Emily liked Hoyt (for reasons unbeknownst to you) and due to that fact, there seemed to be a truce now between the latter and Carla. And even if his relationship with Hoyt interfered with your friendship, Beau still had Cassie as a close friend who treated him well. Yeah, good ol’ silver linings. Silver — that reminded you of Patron and that snapped you out of your thought track enough to be able to finally move out of your frozen state. “I’m going to the bar to get a drink. I’ll meet you back at the table.”

Beau’s brows furrowed in question and he gestured to the half empty glass in his hand. “This is your drink.”

“The drink you’ve been gulping down the last two minutes?” You took more notice of the glass and it was indeed one of your favorite drinks. You felt bad that you hadn’t noticed it earlier when he first greeted you.

The pink tinge was back in his cheeks and it made you smile. If nothing else, it was cute and you enjoyed pulling this reaction out of him. Just something else you could tease him over at some point. “Sorry, darlin’. I panicked and just drank it without thinking. But I did get this for you. Let me go get another one and bring it over to you.”

Oh, no way were you going to sit near the smug undersheriff who appeared to be officially now under the sheriff without having some form of a liquid bumper. Besides, you deserved at least one flirty wink from Aiden the cute bartender, especially after what you were going to have to deal with for the next hour. No doubt that if Denise was right and Beau and Hoyt were coming out and confirming everyone’s suspicions, the blonde was going to definitely rub their noses in it and claim her territory for real. You wouldn’t even be surprised if she lifted a leg at some point. You needed the fleeting good feeling one flirty interaction at the bar might give you. It would sustain you enough until you left for the night. Plus, a free shot or two couldn’t hurt in that endeavor.

“No, that’s okay. I’ll get it but thank you anyway. I’ll get you a refill, too. I’ll see you in a few.” You squeezed his arm, smiling, and turned to make your way to the bar before he could say anything. Once you maneuvered around the multiple bodies packing the area, you luckily found an open space at the bar to slip into. You waited patiently for your turn to order after your bartender sent a smile and wink your way to acknowledge you, completing the orders for the couple who got there before you. You tapped your foot to the music and just as the song ended, an arm came around your shoulders making you tense up. As you were about to warn the owner of the arm that if they didn’t move it they’d lose it, a familiar voice spoke in your ear. “I’ve got this round, sweetheart.”

You turned to find Beau smirking down at you. “I thought we were meeting over at the table.”

He shrugged and pulled out his wallet. “You got the tab last time. This time it’s on me. Whatever you want.”

“Wait, you’re buying? In that case, I’m going to order my fourth and fifth rounds right now.”

“Ha ha. In that case, I’ll be your DD tonight.” He flashed you a bright smile.

“I’m not sleeping in the tin can again,” you stated.

“What is it with you and my trailer? Why can’t you just be nice to her?”

“Why can’t you stop calling it a her?”

“Not this again. It’s my home, Y/N. Why you gotta knock it? What’s she ever done to you?” He laughed.

“I’m not knocking it, or you,” you reassured him. “I just won’t ever refer to it as a her. The moment you accept that is the moment I’ll stop calling it the tin can it is.”

Shaking his head, he sighed and retracted his arm from your shoulders. “She deserves more respect than that. She’s housed you when you needed it and she’s taken great care of me. Of Em, too.”

You snorted a laugh. “Em hates that thing almost as much as I do. You know I'm right.”

Beau rolled his eyes but stayed silent. Your smug smirk settled on your face when he pulled out his phone, presumably to send a message to the daughter you had just been discussing. Giving him privacy, you glanced back at Aiden who motioned to you that you were next in line when you noticed the TV screen above his head. Your eyes widened when you saw the headline.

Standing outside of the same building you had been at two days ago was an anchorwoman speaking to the camera in the foreground while in the background there was a group of people with painted signs, shouting or chanting. You couldn’t hear the sound so you couldn’t be sure which but it was definitely one of them.

“Looks like someone’s protesting that place after all.” You turned to see Beau watching the screen intently with you before he gave you another smirk.

You saw an all-too familiar gleam in his eyes and you just knew. “Was that you?”

He shrugged a shoulder and leaned in closer to you, keeping his eyes on the TV. “I may have let it slip to one of our journalist friends what my department had witnessed and the fact that the company denied us access to their cameras.” You gaped at him, shocked at his revelation. If his name was used, he could be in for a whole world of trouble. “I told them off the record, of course.” Relief immediately began filling your body. “And I may have asked Carla if she could recommend a good defense attorney for one Martin Webb after filling her in on what happened there. And she may have also recommended an attorney that he can talk to who specializes in animal cruelty cases, who has gone after big companies like this before for this very thing.” He took another sip of the mostly finished drink he had set down on the counter.

Recovering enough from your shock, you managed to ask, “And the protest?”

“We’re keeping an eye on things but as long as it remains peaceful, we shouldn’t need to step in. I let Helena PD know and they’re doing the same. They’ve got two bodies over there right now, just making sure private security doesn’t try anything and everyone’s safe.” He then met your eyes. “I told you, Y/N, we do our jobs, that’s it. We can’t get involved.” He shot you a wink.

You smiled, thinking back to your conversation where he’d told you that very thing. At the time you had been disappointed but realized he was right to say it. But then again, this was Beau. When hadn’t he thrown the rule book out when something important was on the line? “Who are the protestors? What organization?”

“Let’s just say that Em knows how to fill out an anonymous tip form online and PETA has plenty of those. And she may have used social media to help spread the word.”

You leaned forward and kissed his cheek, surprising him. “Thank you,” you whispered into his ear as you wrapped your arms around his neck. You weren’t surprised at the actions he took because he was always a good compassionate man but in the same vein, you were stunned. He had really thought of everything.

“I’ve told you before, darlin’, I’ve got you,” he murmured, and tightened his embrace around you.

The gratitude you felt warred with the guilt surging inside. You needed to tell him the truth about what you’d done the other day. “I need to tell you something,” you rushed out.

He pulled back and cupped your cheek, stroking your cheek with his thumb. “That you put a call in to the Feds?”

Your brows began to furrow in question and he used his thumb to then smooth out the crinkle in your skin once you nodded.

“Sanchez, right?”

Your jaw dropped. “Yes, but how did you…” You could suddenly feel your ire rising when you realized where he’d probably heard the name. “Did Pops tell you?”

He shook his head and moved in closer to you since someone appeared on his other side. “Once you put that tip in, the agency contacted me. Just for verification purposes,” he clarified. “I told them they should check it out, that our hands were tied and that was why you had contacted them. With my full knowledge and support.” Something that looked like remorse immediately began to fill his eyes and the elation you felt began to dim. Uh oh, why was he getting that look?

“Well, thank you for backing me up on that.” You dug your teeth into your bottom lip nervously. “Beau, I need you to know. I wasn’t trying to go around—”

“I know that.” He chucked your chin affectionately. “Hell, when I saw you take that form from my office, I knew what you were up to. If I were in your shoes, I’d have done the same thing. I’m damn proud of you for it.” His smile faded slightly. “If what you saw bothered you that much, then I know it’s bad and needs to be handled. I’m just sorry there wasn’t more I could do.”

You studied him, smiling warmly. “You did way more than anyone could have or even would have done in your position.” You hugged him again because you just had to. “Really, thank you,” you whispered into his ear.

His hand gently rubbed up and down your back. “Now, I need to tell you something.”

All of your happiness evaporated in a single instant. You braced yourself as best you could. This was it; this was the moment he would tell you that he and Jenny Hoyt were officially an item. You felt sick to your stomach at the thought but you knew after how much he’d just done to help you and what he’d put on the line to cover for you, you had to at least pretend to be happy for your friend. Or at the very least be supportive, no matter how much it turned your stomach that he was choosing someone who guaranteed was going to make his life a living hell when she didn’t get her way or they weren’t getting along. Just like she made yours insufferable every single day.

You forced yourself to take a quiet breath and then moved back, forcing a smile and hoping to hell that you didn’t look as worried as you felt. You must have failed miserably because Beau leaned in and reassuringly stroked your cheek with his thumb, his brows drawn together as he studied you.

So, this must really be bad; perhaps, Hoyt had him wrapped tighter around her finger than you'd imagined. Was there a wedding you’d be forced to attend sometime soon? Or…something worse? You did your best to steel yourself against it but you couldn’t keep your eyes from tearing up or the lump from forming in your throat.

“Listen, Y/N, Hoyt—”

Just then, another voice interrupted. “What can I get you guys?”

You both looked to see the Aiden in front of you, no longer smiling, no longer winking, and definitely no longer flirtatious. One only had to look in your direction to see why; you and Beau were practically in each other’s laps and he had been touching your face a moment ago. To everyone who didn’t know you and what close friends you were, you probably looked like a couple. And even if you tried to explain that you had to lean in close to hear what the other was saying, those people still wouldn’t buy it. That thought made you untangle yourself from Beau, clear your throat, and place your order. Without a hint of a smile, Aiden gave you a nod and moved to make the drinks. Well, so much for that little boost you had been banking on to sustain you through this event. There was no way he was buying you any shots this time, either.

Beau had a hand on your knee, squeezing reassuringly. You knew he only meant it as comfort but you were tempted to tell him that he could no longer be this affectionate with you due to his new public relationship. Instead, you decided to soak it up while you could. If you didn’t know yet officially, then you didn’t know any better, right? You nearly grimaced; since when did you become such a coward, making bullshit justifications to yourself?

Your response to that was to force yourself to ask the question you didn’t really want the answer to. “So, you were saying, about Hoyt?”

Beau considered you for a moment before moving his hand up your thigh to rest right above your knee, rubbing his thumb in soothing circles on your skin. You were usually good at keeping your reactions on lockdown; it helped you time and time again in your line of work. But you must absolutely be failing at it right now.

Instead of answering you, he seemed to switch tacks. “Do you remember that night we saw the shooting star?”

You nodded, wondering why he was mentioning that instead of just telling you outright what you dreaded to know.

He started to smile. “I think about that night a lot.”

You quickly sifted through the memories of that night and then it hit you. He had asked you to extend an olive branch to Hoyt, to try to make it work, when he couldn’t look you in the eyes when answering your question about her, and now you knew why.

“You asked if I made a wish?” You once again nodded your confirmation. “And I told you I already had?”

He wished for you two to get along and now he was going to do something drastic to make it come true. That’s what it had to be, that’s why all of this drawn out suspense was coming from his end. If he didn’t just come out and say it soon, you were going to ask him point-blank. No more pussyfooting around it. It’s not like you didn’t already know; you had suspected as much for the longest time.

Your brows began to furrow again, this time in confusion, when he covered your hand on the bar with his free one, giving you a sheepish smile. “Sorry, I’m a little nervous.” You tried to give him a reassuring smile of your own, not sure if you really did or just grimaced. “I don’t want this to ruin anything between us. Our friendship is really important to me and I… This isn’t exactly how I planned on telling you. I meant to tell you that night on my deck but I chickened out at the last second.” Your heart was starting to pound and your chest started to constrict. You refused to give in to the feeling, though. You were going to force yourself to sit through this, come hell or high water. It was the least you could do for your best friend.

“I’m a cop, I already have a teenage daughter, and an ex-wife who I’m still close with and talk to more than I should. I have a lot of ghosts I’m still dealing with. I’m not the best catch for a girl and I know that.”

You impulsively cupped his cheek with your hand after ripping it from underneath his, causing his expression to be lined with uncertainty and confusion. “Yes, you are, and you deserve the best. Don’t ever doubt it, Beau. If someone truly loves you, they will accept all of those things as part of your package and they won’t think twice about whether it’s something they want or not. Emily is a part of you and if a woman really loves you, she will automatically love her because of that. How can someone claim to love the man but not every single part of him? Emily will always come first and that won’t even be a question in this woman’s mind. In fact, she’ll insist on it if she’s the right one for you.” Something you highly doubted Hoyt was, despite being a parent herself.

Beau’s smile turned from unsure to affectionate in a heartbeat. “And Carla?”

“Alright, I’m not gonna lie, that may be a tough workaround.” You both laughed and you felt a bit lighter than you had a minute ago. “But the right woman will understand when you tell her what Carla and your family have been through this past year, and she won’t feel threatened in the slightest because she’ll know that while you’ll always love the mother of your daughter, you’re no longer in love with her, and there will be appropriate boundaries in place. And everyone has ghosts, Beau. There isn’t one single person walking this planet who doesn’t. What matters is who helps you confront them and keeps them at bay when need be. Your own personal ghostbuster.” You stroked his skin tenderly and looked him straight in the eyes, giving him a soft smile and hoping he would hear you, really hear you. “You, Beau Arlen, are a good man and you deserve the very best. Don’t you ever think otherwise.”

Pink dusted his cheeks once more but you didn’t feel the urge to tease him over it like you had before. He stared at you for a moment and then lowered your hand from his cheek and took it into his. His gaze was earnest and you knew that this was it, this was the moment when everything would change. Your friendship was about to change in a way that you’d most likely never recover from. Hoyt would personally see to it, you had no doubt.

Sure enough, he leaned in slightly so you could hear him, his green eyes focused on yours. “Y/N, we’ve known each other a long time. We’ve worked together, been thick as thieves…you’ve been my partner and you’ve been my best friend. You were there when everything happened in Houston. You got me through my divorce, my grief, and even when Em was taken…” His eyes began to have that faraway look you’d seen one too many times on him these past six months. You knew it still haunted him and would until his last day even though Emily was safe. And you couldn’t blame him one bit. How would you be if it had been your own daughter who had been in danger like that?

You squeezed his hand to urge him to continue.

He came back to you and cleared his throat quietly. “Sorry.” The corner of his lips tipped up in the beginning of a smile. “I know I’m rambling here but what I’m trying to say is that I need you to know that I’ve given this a lot of thought and I think it’s high time that I tell you—”

“Beau, there you are!”

You didn’t have time to process the words or that the bubble you both had been in had violently popped before Beau’s hand was ripped out of yours with force as a flurry of blonde launched at your best friend. His arms came around the body that had just practically jumped into his lap, his eyes wide, and loud kisses were suddenly being peppered alongside his face. Beau stared at you, frozen in shock, and you noticed Hoyt’s triumphant smirk slowly turn on you, her teeth then burying into her bottom lip.

“Y/L/N,” she greeted you coolly.

“Hoyt,” you replied with just as much ice injected into your tone.

Sadly, you were right. A leg had been lifted in your vicinity and Beau not stopping her told you everything you needed to know, everything he had been struggling to get out the last few minutes. Disappointment grew deep within your chest and radiated throughout your whole body. Your instincts had been right; he had been seeing her and he was waiting for the right time to tell you. He deserved so much better than Jenny Hoyt but it was his choice, and clearly he’d made it.

Fortunately, your drinks arrived at that very moment. You turned to thank Aiden, no longer caring whether he was smiling or not. You felt numb as you pulled out some cash to leave on the bar for him. You pushed Beau’s refill in his direction, grabbed your glass, and turned to leave. “See you over there,” you called, taking a sip and wading through the packed bodies.

“Y/N, wait!”

You pretended you hadn’t heard him yelling for you and continued your trek to the back of the bar. You weren’t trying to be cruel but you definitely needed a minute to get your bearings after having the confirmation of the worst possible outcome shoved so forcefully in your face. And a tiny part of you couldn’t exactly look him in the eye right now.

You forced a smile onto your face by the time you reached your group. “Hey, all,” you greeted. Everyone returned it, some more warmly than others, and you gave a wink to Pops who shot you a grin. Cassie scooted over in the booth to make room for you to sit and you gave her a one-armed hug and bright smile as a thank you.

“Where’s Beau? He said he was going to say hi to you and then he’d bring you over.”

“He did but he’s still at the bar. He’ll come over when he’s ready, I guess.”

She tilted her head curiously and studied you for a moment, her eyes narrowing slightly. She was assessing you and you figured that maybe your tone had betrayed your bitter disappointment. You forced a smile and mentally berated yourself for your carelessness. After a moment, she glanced over your head towards the bar area and whatever she saw had her then giving you a sad smile of understanding. You didn’t turn to look; you had seen enough. But it was further confirmation that not only were you not keeping yourself together as well as you should have been, but that your problem was about to become an even bigger one. Hoyt had been insufferable; now openly involved with the boss, she was bound to be a nightmare. “Yay,” you muttered with false enthusiasm at the thought before taking a sip of your drink.

You quickly glanced at your watch and told yourself it was only one hour. For God’s sake, you could do an hour. Time to suck it up and put your big girl panties on. You easily joined in the conversation and many laughs were had as the typical banter began. You pretended not to notice when Beau rejoined the group, a beer in his hand, or the subtle shake of his head he gave to Cassie’s questioning gaze. You also acted as if you hadn’t seen Cassie’s fleeting disappointment followed by the same understanding she’d given you, along with an encouraging smile for him. You willfully ignored Hoyt joining your group at the table with her never-ending pout.

You actually ended up enjoying yourself and stayed longer than you had anticipated you would. Thankfully, Hoyt didn’t maul Beau as she had when you first arrived. Instead she sat there, sulking, wearing that hurt expression every so often. You had no idea who had pissed in her cheerios but if you did, they’d get one hell of a thank you-gram from you. You figured that while the secret about her and Beau was out, perhaps the latter wanted to maintain some semblance of professionalism in front of the department. It was bound to be a dicey subject at work despite everyone already being in the know, especially with Beau being the overall boss, but you knew he’d navigate that as seamlessly as he could. Maybe that was what had the undersheriff suddenly and uncharacteristically quiet with everyone else. Either way, you were grateful.

Predictably, Hoyt had downed several drinks until she was hammered, and this time, Cassie offered to drive her home. Disappointment radiated off of the blonde as she stared sadly in Beau’s direction who asked if she and Cassie would be okay, never meeting Hoyt’s forlorn gaze. She didn’t say a word but Cassie reassured him they would be. He asked her to text him when they got home safely and Cassie promised she would. Pops came to the rescue and helped Cassie get Hoyt out to the car. You had wanted to offer to help, for Cassie’s sake if nothing else, but after tonight’s performance, you just couldn’t muster up enough compassion for Hoyt and you really thought you’d become violently ill if you tried. You sincerely hoped you would feel differently in the morning when work resumed and you’d be able to stomach the smugness you knew would be directed at you from now on.

You checked your watch and it was near midnight. Time to head home. You were about to announce your impending departure when the music changed and Beau’s head snapped up. His eyes met yours, as they had been trying to do all night but you had refused to do so, and you could see a slight glimmer of hope shining back at you. You immediately recognized the song and you heaved a sigh. Crap.

A smirk formed on his face when he realized you weren’t looking away and you had indeed heard that song start up. He got to his feet and made his way over to you, every step making your heart jump higher into your throat. How were you ever supposed to stay mad at him or justly disappointed in something he did or said when he hit you with a boyish grin like that?

When he reached you, he held out a hand. “May I have this dance?”

You glanced behind him quickly. “No one else is dancing, Beau.”

“So? Come on,” he whined. “Dance with me. I deserve it after you ignored me all night.” On the surface, he was teasing you but you could see a faint layer of hurt behind his smile that he worked hard to hide. Crap.

You placed your hand in his and stood up. “One,” you agreed.

His smile softened and he turned to lead you away from the group of remaining guys, who of course were making wolf whistles and calling out what they considered to be jokes. You both ignored them and Beau stopped in a spot, turning to pull you into his arms. You placed your hands on his shoulders, happy to maintain some distance, but he wasn’t having that. He moved your arms around his neck and encircled his around your waist. There was barely an inch of space between you and he began to sway you both side to side, almost keeping time to the rhythm of the song.

“You picked this song on the jukebox, didn’t you?”

That devilish smirk reappeared as expected. “I couldn’t believe it was on there and I just knew I had to play it. For old times’ sake,” he finished in a murmur.

You tried to swallow past the lump forming in your throat but you failed miserably. Truth be told, you’d rather forget some of the memories this song evoked in you. Things he didn’t remember from that one night a long time ago, right after Carla had announced her engagement to Avery McAllister, following their whirlwind romance. Right after the huge blowup Beau and Carla had on the phone when she’d told him the news. And more importantly, right after he’d called you and begged you to come over, saying he needed to see you, his voice breaking as emotions overwhelmed him in that moment.

“I’m sorry, honey.” Your eyes snapped up to his, wondering if every single emotion of yours was showing on your face tonight. “For earlier,” he clarified. “That shouldn’t have happened.”

Stuck between slipping into a sea of unwanted memories and being consumed with disappointment at your best friend’s choices as of late, you forced yourself to become stone throughout. It was the only way you’d make it through this dance and the ensuing ride home. You shrugged an uncaring shoulder. “Not my business.”

You watched as his eyes narrowed, studying you intently. You made sure not to look away and to keep a neutral expression on your face. You absolutely could not let a single trace of hurt or disappointment show through because he would see it in a heartbeat. And that would make things even more awkward between you in regards to Hoyt.

He must not have seen whatever he was looking for, or maybe he had, because he shook his head in disbelief. When you heard his familiar scoff, you fully expected him to walk away from you or give you hell, one or the other. Instead, he did the last thing you thought he would: he pulled you into him more and buried his face into your neck, his lips resting on the juncture between your neck and shoulder, his neatly-trimmed beard rubbing gently against your skin and making you squirm internally. Not that last thing you’d expect him to do because he hadn’t done it before but usually the two of you were alone when he did, or at least not in front of half the department he helmed. You tried to think back to how many drinks you noticed him having throughout the night. You had only seen the drink you had bought him which you assumed he drank at the bar with Hoyt, and two beers. If he had done shots with Hoyt, she would have been half wasted by the time they returned to the group. If he had drunk a round at the bar with Hoyt in addition to his refill, they would have taken way longer to come back. He didn’t appear drunk or even tipsy. You had seen him in both conditions plenty of times; there was nothing indicating to you that you needed to take Pedro’s keys so you could drive him home.

“You’re my best friend,” he confessed near your ear, the puff of air tickling the skin of your neck. It made a memory resurface that you immediately slammed back down. “And that’s more important to me than anything.” He tightened his grip on you and burrowed deeper into you. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Y/N.”

You couldn’t help but tangle your fingers into his hair located at the back of his head. One of the guys made some stupid comment and you simply flipped him off with your free hand, hearing them erupt in laughter. You knew Beau would never hear the end of this and now neither would you. But in that moment, you chose not to care. Something was obviously bothering him if he was clinging to you in plain sight like this, especially with most of the bar’s patrons making up the local population who were more than aware of who Beau was. You tightened your embrace around him and held him that he seemed to desperately need, letting him take comfort in you, just as you had that one night a couple of years ago. A thought saddened you as soon as it popped into your head; maybe he too realized your friendship was now going to change and things would never be the same. That they hadn’t been from the moment you set foot in Helena. That would explain the song choice as well. A fitting goodbye in a way.

Once the song ended, he pulled back and gave you a sad smile. Your heart plummeted to your stomach as you realized you had been right. He cupped your face and pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead. His arms then wound around you in another hug, his lips pressing near your hairline. “You alright to drive home, darlin’?”

“Yeah, I’m okay. Are you?”

Chuckling, he squeezed you tightly before letting you go with a sigh. “More than alright. As a matter of fact, I’m going to close out the tab and get going myself. Want me to walk you to your car?”

“No, I’ll be okay but thank you for offering.” You tried to study him discreetly, looking for any signs of deception on his part. He seemed sober enough but something felt…off.

He gave you a nod and stepped away. “Text me when you get home, okay? Let me know you made it safely.”

“Will do.” Something about seeing him moving further away from you suddenly filled you with sadness, like this really was a goodbye in some form or another.

Beau smiled and turned to head to the bar. You forced yourself to do the same, in the opposite direction. You told yourself that you were just being silly and the revelation of he and Hoyt confirming them being a thing had rocked you to your core, which resulted in all of these conflicting emotions and thoughts rolling within you. And that coupled with alcohol — your intuitive compass didn’t know which way was up. You were fine to drive, you hadn’t lied, but the drinks definitely gave a sharper edge to how you were feeling tonight. It felt as if you were misreading everything.

Before you could take two steps, you heard your name being called. You spun around to see Beau smiling widely at you. He gently took your hand. “Thanks for the dance, sweetheart.” His tone had changed from just before. It was deeper, sounding like warm honey being drizzled over fruit, and you had only ever heard him use it once before with you. That tone, that song, him taking comfort in you, the reminders of that night… You began to panic inside but you managed to smile back at him, giving him a nod.

His eyes sparkled with that familiar glint of mischief that you had seen all too often back in Houston before shit hit the giant shit fan. Back when you had secretly wondered what could happen when someone dared to find out just what that mischief entailed, thinking Carla was one hell of a lucky woman. And that was before you had gotten to really know him and what an incredible person he was to have at your back, on the job and out of it. “Text me. Don’t forget,” he reminded you.

Unable to speak right then, you nodded once more. He brushed a kiss over your fingers, let go of your hand, winked, and turned on his heel, disappearing through the crowd that had thinned somewhat since you first got here. You watched him walk right up to the bar and ask Aiden for the tab, pulling out his wallet.

It took you a minute to peel your eyes away from him and to get your legs working again. Your knees felt like jello and there had been an all-too familiar fluttery feeling deep within your body, as if there had been some strange air bubble doing a flip on a trampoline at the bottom of your stomach…or possibly lower. You shook your head to clear the thoughts swirling in your head and chalked it up to this very weird night.

After grabbing your things and saying goodbye to the guys, ignoring their razzing, you made a beeline for the parking lot, not turning to look back once, afraid that if you did you might do something that would make things infinitely more complicated. Not only were you not the type of girl to pursue something with an involved man but things were already complicated enough. And you were not firing on all logical cylinders tonight, that was obvious. It wasn’t worth ruining what was left of your friendship and making things even more awkward at work.

Breathing in the cool night air helped to clear your head and you knew you had made the right decision. As much as you despised Jenny Hoyt, you supposed you couldn’t entirely blame her for going after what had been unintentionally dangled right in front of her. Beau Arlen was the full package: a good man with a big heart, a great sense of humor, a loving father, respectful of all women in and out of the bedroom, a bright smile with infectious laughter, and a natural born leader with the wisdom and patience to match. How could any woman resist that?

You laughed at yourself because now it was confirmed for you. Your brain was definitely short-circuiting if you were sympathizing with the woman who was now most likely going to tear one of the best relationships of your life apart, gleefully doing so as you helplessly watched. The sooner you got home and into bed the better.

Please let me know if you would like to be tagged for this series.

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#beau arlen x reader #beau arlen x female reader #beau arlen x you #beau arlen x y/n #big sky fanfiction #beau arlen #beau arlen fanfiction #beau arlen fanfic #big sky fanfic #big sky #only ever holding onto you #only ever holding onto you chapter 2 #thebiggerbear writes

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bcolfanfic · 3 months

Note

Hi! Just wondering if you have any headcanons for Josie and Rosie’s daughter? I think that’s such a fun ship and would love to hear any of your thoughts about them.

babies <3 josie is the longer hair- if any of y’all need a refresher in young vets au josie is the bucks, naomi is rosie’s kiddo that he adopted as a single dad. (though she’s also later adopted by his partner aiden that he gets w later down the line) s/o to @swifty-fox who this was developed with. we have created. so much young vets au next gen lore.

sweet girls

well. kinda. josie is a bit of a terror there for a minute.

she is bucky’s after all (: i think ive said before that while obv they both love both their kids, josie Is bucky and micah Is gale.

has had a lot of girlfriends and situationships and what have you

naomi. has- not.

knows she’s gay, is very gender non conforming just. rizzless like her father (sorry rosie)

is buddies with josie and has kinda had a littleee crush on her since they were kids but. always got the sense that josie thought she was too Cool for her.

why would she want some dweeby gnc girl a couple years younger than her when clearly she can get any pretty girl she wants <\3 ugh naomi baby.

they become a closer when naomi goes away for college bc she. struggles to make friends for a minute and josie texts her to check in and they just start talking more from there.

naomi does meet /someone/ at college and. this girl is not very nice but ahhh we cannot stop her your first gay relationship being toxic as shit is a baby gay canon event.

brings her to the big memorial day weekend reunion get together with everyone in wyoming and josie immediately does not like this girl lmfao.

surely that means nothing (:

everything kinda blows up bc josie goes into the house for something, and naomi’s little girlfriend follows her and tries to hit on her. which naomi walks in on.

and ugh god love naomi she thinks josie was the one that ‘started it’ and they just start going at it. naomi following her back out of the house yelling at her that she can have whoever she wants why can’t she let her have one thing. josie yelling at her that she didn’t do anything- her little girlfriend is a slimy little weasel, nothing good comes from latching onto the first person to pay attention to you.

draws the attention of. everyone in the yard lmfao. bucky and rosie and aiden have to run over and break it up before someone gets smacked.

josie all pouty and frustrated off with bucky and aiden rambling about how she didn’t do anything, naomi is such a good girl, she hates that her little girlfriend is so awful bc naomi doesn’t deserve that.

naomi off w rosie and curt crying because she feels like she’s just never going to be happy <\3 even her own *girlfriend* wants josie instead of her, and she gets it bc josie is perfect but. feels so stupid and broken.

eventually when everyone’s heads are cooler josie all awkward asks naomi if she wants to go on a drive to get away from everyone for a bit. get fast food or something.

and naomi is like 😐🙁 i guess

josie gets like five minutes down the road before pulling over under a tree and naomi is like ??? is something wrong with your car i thought we were getting food ???

and josie just. looks at her for a long few seconds before unbuckling and reaching across the console and kissing that girl good.

naomi kisses her back but then yanks away like she’s been burned bc. shock.

kinda immediately throws up walls nudging her off telling her she doesn’t want her pity over her own girlfriend not wanting her.

don’t do that to me jos, please

sweet josie. a terror but a good girl at heart like bucky. just sighs and tells her she’s wanted to do that since before she brought that little jerk around.

naomi still pushes back just 🫤 i don’t buy that. picking at her nails looking at her lap. tells her she can have anyone she wants she sure as shit doesn’t want /her/. all your girlfriends are gorgeous i know what your type is.

(naomi has. a lot of insecurity around the gender non confirming stuff bless her sweet heart. rosie and aiden are such good dads about it. her best friends <3.)

but josie does want her. she really does <3

tells her that. kisses her again. they end up in the backseat of josie’s falling apart car for an hour and make all the guys giggle like little girls when they rock back up to the bucks house like flushed little baby deer.

micah pushed naomi’s little POS girlfriend into the lake

#young vets au #masters of the air #masters of the air oc #mota oc #josie x naomi #josie egan #naomi rosenthal

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wizardofrozz · 1 year

Text

Tell Me

CT-2697 "Sawbones", CT-2525 "Quarter", CT-6116 "Kix", CT-9181 "Aiden", CT-7007 "Jax", Commander Wolffe, Captain Rex, and mention of Commander Fox

Word Count: ~4.6k

Warnings: war, swearing, traumatic injury, angst, verbal argument

Summary: Sawbones makes it back to Triple Zero only to have his batchmates drop a bombshell in his lap.

A/N: Okay I finally decided to post this and give a bit more information about Sawbones and his relationships with his batchmates. Aiden, the Coruscant Guard's medic, belongs to me and Quarter, the medic for the 21st Nova Corps, and Jax, the medic for the 41st Elite Corps, belong to @hetalianskywalker ❤️

Saw stepped off the hovering gunship, grunting when his boots hit the ground. Coruscant glistened in the morning sun and Saw wrinkled his nose, even the filters in his helmet couldn’t lessen the smog hanging over the capital world. Another set of boots hit the ground beside him and he turned his head enough to catch a glimpse of Wolffe standing at his side.

“You headin’ to the barracks?” Wolffe asked, staring out at the bustling city.

“I guess,” Saw huffed, crossing his arms, “should probably go pay my pain in the ass little brother a visit.” Wolffe laughed under his breath, shifting his weight to bump their shoulders together, making the corner of Saw’s mouth lift in the ghost of a smile that was hidden behind his helmet.

“I was thinking the same thing,” Wolffe sighed, his speech sounding slightly slurred with exhaustion.

“Thought Fox was older.”

“He is,” Wolffe replied, leaning more of his weight into Saw’s side, “but the 501st just landed for shore leave too.” Saw perked up at the mention of Kix’s battalion; it had been far too long since he’d seen his little brother. “If you wait a few more minutes I’ll walk with you.”

“Fine,” Saw mumbled, although he already planned on waiting. Wolffe snorted, the sound muffled by his helmet and Saw was close enough to hear the inhale that meant he was going to say something else before his comlink started to chirp. Wolffe blindly hit the button on his vambrace and Saw could hear his muffled greeting but the rest of the conversation was lost to the confines of the commander’s helmet.

The buzz of the surrounding hangar filled the silence, allowing Saw’s mind to wander as he waited for Wolffe to finish the call. Then Wolffe suddenly stiffened, ending the call a few seconds later yet they continued to stand in silence.

“We need to get to the barracks,” Wolffe managed through clenched teeth.

“Why?” Instead of answering, Wolffe grabbed his arm, yanking him out into the warm sunlight and Saw had to fight the urge to pull away. “I want an answer.”

“And you’ll get one,” Wolffe snapped, finally releasing his arm. Saw ground his teeth together but kept pace with his commander, closing the distance between the hangar and the barracks in record time. They nearly ran over a group of Rex’s shinies, the five troopers stopping in their tracks to salute the higher-ranking officers but Wolffe never broke stride, barely acknowledging the troopers. The main barracks were humming with life, 501st, 104th, and Corries mingles in the halls as they went but Saw was too focused on their destination. While he never worked on Coruscant, he had spent enough time navigating the building to find Aiden that he recognized the pathway.

Saw picked up the pace, shoving past groups of troopers with Wolffe on his heels. The medbay’s door slid open, cutting off the conversation taking place a few feet inside. Kix, Aiden, and Rex all turned at the same time but Aiden looked away first, shifting his weight anxiously as Saw stalked closer.

“Someone start talking. Now.” His voice came out harsh, cold almost, and Saw hated himself a little more when Aiden flinched. Kix leveled him with a narrow-eyed look before turning to their youngest brother, resting a hand on Aiden’s bright red shoulder bell.

“Go finish your shift, okay?” Kix urged, offering Aiden a small smile. Aiden squeezed his eyes shut for a moment before nodding; he glanced in Saw’s direction but he wouldn’t let their eyes meet before he hurried off. Kix shifted his attention back to Saw, jerking his head toward Aiden’s office. Saw ground his teeth together but followed quietly, glancing at the medbay door when it slid open again, catching a glimpse of Rex, Wolffe, and now Fox greeting each other. When the door to Aiden’s office finally shut, Saw pulled his helmet off, sucking in a clean lungful of air.

“Kix,” he hissed, tossing his helmet onto the nearby desk, “what the fuck is going on?” Saw turned to face his younger brother, squinting when Kix refused to meet his eyes, which only made his irritaition grow.

“It - It’s Quarter,” Kix whispered, looking down at the floor. The anger dissipated so suddenly that it left Saw a little dizzy, his face falling until he was just staring at Kix with a wide-eyed expression. Kix didn’t meet his eyes when he spoke again. “It’s bad, Saw. He - there was an explosion.”

“He’s dead,” Saw stated, squeezing his eyes shut. There was a deep, hollow ache building in his chest as he pictured his brother’s face.

“He’s alive but it was close,” Kix explained, making Saw’s eyes pop open. “He’s alive but - but he lost both legs.”

“What? How - how did you find out?”

“Quarter, he uh, called me,” Kix mumbled, looking up through his lashes. Saw’s nostrils flared but he managed to keep his voice steady.

“And he expected you to relay the message,” Saw growled, clenching his hands at his side. Kix flinched, looking away and Saw felt like he was missing something.

“No, he called Aiden right after.” Saw blinked at his brother for a few seconds until the realization dawned on him. There was a good chance Jax, who was in the middle of a campaign, had received a call as well and based on Kix’s reaction, this wasn’t a brand-new development. Meaning, Saw was the last to find out, and it wasn’t even from Quarter himself. “Saw -”

“Don’t,” he barked, pointing a finger at Kix, “don’t you defend him. He didn’t even have the fucking decency to call me!”

“Do you blame him!” Kix shouted, stepping into Saw’s personal space. The close proximity was nothing new but the venom in his brother’s voice made Saw jerk back in surprise. “When’s the last time you even spoke to him?”

“The last time the five of us had a com call,” Saw replied immediately, his expression twisting into its usual scowl.

“When’s the last time you spoke to him alone, jackass,” Kix corrected, stabbing a finger into his armored chest. Saw opened his mouth to answer only for it to hang open because…when was the last time he just talked to Quarter. Saw met his brother’s gaze, blinking rapidly a few times; after a few seconds, Kix’s face softened and he let out a long breath. “Not saying he was right but you two haven’t been on the best of terms for a long time, Saw.”

Kix was right but still. Something like this was important. How could Quarter not tell him? It felt like all of the air was ripped from his lungs, forcing him to take a few shaky steps back and drop into Aiden’s chair. He rested his elbows on his knees to cradle his head, massaging his temples in a futile attempt to ward off the headache he could feel building behind his eyes.

“That still doesn’t explain why he didn’t call me,” Saw forced out between his teeth, scrubbing at his face. “I don’t give a fuck if we’re on good terms or not, that’s something you fucking tell your brother.” The thump of boots covered up the soft sigh Kix let out and Saw’s stomach dropped when he heard tapping on the keypad beside the door, assuming Kix was leaving him with his own anger. His head snapped up when he heard the lock engage followed by the soft clink of plastoid knocking against durasteel.

“Go on,” Kix urged, crossing his arms.

“What?” Kix rolled his eyes as he pushed off the door, making his way across the room. Saw sat up slightly, giving Kix room to climb onto the edge of Aiden’s desk, watching his brother shift around, shoving a few styluses out from under his ass before turning his attention back to Saw.

“You get it all out now. Scream, cuss, rage until you’re blue in the face,” Kix started, his expression hardening the longer he spoke. “But it starts and ends here, we clear? You are not going to go into his hospital room and start a fight. So take it out on me, right now, and then you fucking leave it here. Got it?” Saw couldn’t help the little smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth; maybe he was rubbing off on Kix after all these years.

“Yes, sir,” Saw sassed and no matter how hard he tried, Kix had to fight the smile threatening to spread across his face. The lighthearted atmosphere didn’t last long though as Saw’s thought drifted back to Quarter and his anger came back with a vengeance.

“Talk to me,” Kix whispered, lightly tapping the toe of his boot against Saw’s shin.

“I don’t understand him,” Saw grumbled, roughly rubbing a fist into his eye.

“To be fair, you never really have,” Kix noted, his legs swinging slowly.

“I can’t fucking believe him. The fucking nerve of him to leave it up to you to tell me,” Saw said, his voice low and cold. “Didn’t even have the balls to tell me himself.”

“I know you’re pissed -”

“Fuck you,” Saw cut in, sitting up straighter. “Pissed off doesn’t even cover it. I’m fucking furious.” Kix tilted his head in that calculating way he always did and Saw felt like he was being flayed alive, a skill Kix had mastered early in their childhood.

“No,” Kix hummed, shaking his head. “You’re terrified.” Saw jerked back, arching a dark brown, attempting to act like Kix was a mile off when in reality he was hitting a little too close to home. “We were all scared, Saw, but this is different.”

“Oh yeah,” he scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“You almost lost him without ever getting the chance to fix whatever broke between you two.” It would’ve been less painful if Kix would’ve just punched him in the face. He’d never admit it out loud and it was almost too raw to even admit to himself but if he didn’t look at it too closely, he could acknowledge that Kix wasn’t wrong. “So no, you’re not furious. You’re scared and hurt.”

“Why?”

“Why what?” Kix asked.

“Why didn’t he call me?” Saw hated how small he sounded, the ache in his chest bleeding into his voice. He looked up at Kix, his expression more open than it had been in a long time and he saw the wide-eyed shock on his brother’s face. “Does he truly think so little of me?”

Coruscant could be very boring when confined to a hospital bed. Quarter had tried to busy himself with reading or watching holofilms but nothing seemed to hold his attention for long. The Paladin was just barely visible in the atmosphere but even without being able to see the Venator from his room, Aiden had already warned him that the 104th were planetside. On the bright side, the anxiety sitting in his stomach like a rock allowed him to ignore the phantom pain wreaking havoc on his lower body.

Quarter mindlessly scrolled through his datapad, eventually finding a few medical journals that caught his attention. He spent the next few hours skimming medical jargon until there was a soft knock at his door, a nurse with a bright smile and a tray of food waiting to be invited in. He eyed the food, poking curiously at the variety of options; staying at Coruscant General had its upsides, one being no ration bars and he made a point of at least trying the things the nurses brought him.

He was about halfway through his meal, mindlessly feeding himself while he continued reading about a prototype upgrade for neural links to prosthetics when he heard the familiar thump of boots coming down the hall. He glanced out the window, noting that Coruscant’s sun had started to dip below the horizon, throwing breathtaking golds, pinks, and oranges across the room. A small smile lifted the corner of his mouth as the boots grew closer; Kix and Aiden had promised to stop by after he got some rest. The familiar sense of home lingered as the boots stopped just outside his door and Quarter turned his head.

His jaw dropped, eyes widening when the door slid open revealing gray and white armor, the chilling wolf skull helmet scanning the room before dropping to his seat form. This was the absolute last person he expected to see and once the reality that Saw was standing in his doorway set in, Quarter stiffened. He did not have a good feeling about what his brother had to say.

“Saw?” he whispered. Quarter didn’t miss the way Saw’s shoulders lifted slightly. An easily recognizable blue vambrace shoved Saw forward, allowing the door to glide shut behind him.

“Who else would it be?” Saw grumbled, awkwardly shifting his weight before finally reaching up to tug his helmet off. He looked everywhere but at Quarter and it made his heart ache. The fear and guilt battling in his chest made him want to fidget but he tried to keep still, not wanting to draw Saw’s attention. It felt like trying to hide from a predator, staying hidden long enough until the threat passed.

However, Saw looked oddly calm, his head turned toward the window. The setting sun threw golden light over his brother’s features, highlighting the weariness in his mostly blank expression. They continued on in silence and Quarter could feel the anxiety vibrating through his bones. Couldn’t Saw just yell at him and get it over with? The chilly atmosphere was worse than his brother ripping him to shreds.

“You know, I hate Coruscant,” Saw eventually mumbled, one of his hands absently tracing the lines of the armor covering his stomach. Quarter could only blink in confusion, the emotional whiplash making his head hurt.

“Why?” Quarter asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Saw’s eyes flickered to him for the first time, raking over Quarter before looking back out the window. He was starting to wonder why his brother was trying to make small talk before concluding he never wanted to see Quarter again.

“Smells like shit,” Saw grunted, his eyes narrowing slightly like he was straining to see something. “Too much life on one planet.”

“I - yeah I guess so,” Quarter replied, still feeling very lost. What the hell was Saw getting at? Was he trying to make Quarter squirm? “Saw, look I -”

“Why?” Saw cut him off, his eyes never leaving the darkening horizon.

“Why what?” Although, the question was pointless; Quarter knew exactly what Saw was talking about.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” The inflection in Saw’s voice made Quarter stop short, squinting at his brother. Saw had a fairly low speaking voice, his words rumbling through the air like the thunder that plagued Kamino but there was something different about it now. An odd tone that Quarter couldn’t remember ever hearing from his slightly younger brother.

“I’m - I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Quarter sighed, dropping his gaze. He tried not to focus on the way the sheet fell flatter sooner than it should. His fingers started twisting the sheet around his waist and he had to force himself to still them. “Everything happened so fast and…and I thought I’d be bothering you. You - you barely seem to tolerate me nowadays.” He lost some of his steam until his voice was barely a whisper in the silent room. It took all of his courage to look through his lashes and he almost wished he hadn’t when he found Saw staring at him, his face surprisingly slack.

“Are you fucking dense?” Quarter bristled, his brows pinching together; he had tried to prepare for Saw’s ire but that was just nasty. Sawbones could be cruel, he’d heard the stories, but it was never aimed at their batch.

“No,” Quarter snapped, turning his head. He did his best to steel himself, waiting for what came next but the soft, defeated sigh wasn’t what he was expecting.

“Did…” Saw paused, quietly clearing his throat, “did you really think I’d be happy to hear secondhand from Kix?” Quarter swallowed, his throat clicking as he looked down at his hands where they rested in his lap. A stray lock of hair fell into his face and he watched it sway for a moment before taking a deep breath.

“I…I wasn’t sure you’d care.” There was a pregnant pause that made his anxiety spike and he flinched when he heard Saw move but he couldn’t face his brother. A warm, familiar hand gripped his jaw, forcing him to look up at Saw’s bent form. There was a haunted look in his brother’s eyes and he could only imagine what was running through Saw’s head as they locked eyes.

“Get outta your head and listen to me,” Saw hissed and Quarter watched his jaw flex. “You fucking scared me, do you get that? I thought you were dead and I found out from Kix. Do you understand what a kick to the face that was?” Quarter must’ve been a sight, his lips parted, eyes comically wide as he blinked at Saw’s tense expression. If Saw hadn’t had a firm grip on his face, his jaw probably would’ve dropped.

“I - I didn’t think…” Quarter trailed off because what did he think at the time? Now, faced with the hurt he’d unintentionally inflicted on his brother, Quarter acknowledged that it was a shitty thing to do. “I - we haven’t talked in…months, Saw, I just thought…" He hated the way Saw’s eyes squeezed shut, the way his face turned away as he released Quarter’s jaw and took a step back. Saw just stared at the floor for a beat, his jaw working, chewing on his next sentence.

“You should know I give a damn about what happens to you. Period,” Saw stated but it sounded more like he was talking to himself than Quarter. “It’s my fault that you don’t.”

“It…I should take some of the blame too,” Quarter whispered. There hadn’t been some big, explosive reason behind their strained relationship. Things had just gotten harder: Quarter started to doubt himself and his place in their batch more and Saw was changing, growing bitter and angry. Then they had been shipped off, spread across the galaxy and they never found that rhythm that they had as kids.

Saw and Quarter became strangers with a past.

Saw huffed, bringing Quarter back to reality, and reached up to massage above his left eyebrow. Despite the tension in the air, Quarter smiled a little at the gesture, it was something Saw had done since they were kids when he got stressed.

“Never broke that habit it seems,” Quarter noted, nodding at Saw’s raised hand when he turned at the sound of Quarter’s voice.

“Heh, guess not.” Saw let his hand drop back to his side, glancing at Quarter out of the side of his eye. “You remember it?”

“Course,” Quarter scoffed lightheartedly, “that’s how I knew Jax was about 2 seconds away from getting punched.” Saw let out a quiet huff of laughter, the corner of his mouth twitching in his bastardized version of a smirk. And Quarter was hit with just how much he missed Saw. Yes, they spoke here and there but one of their batchmates was always around too. “I’m sorry, vod.”

“Yeah…me too,” Saw mumbled, scratching at his cheek. Quarter surprised himself with the laugh that burst from his lips but the way Saw’s smirk grew told him that his brother was hoping for that reaction.

“I see you’re still allergic to apologizing,” Quarter chuckled.

“You got the gist,” Saw grumbled but his expression was a little softer.

“One day I'll get the word sorry out of you,” Quarter teased tentatively. He was rewarded with a dark little smile from his brother that made him almost giddy.

“Maybe they’ll write on my headstone,” Saw said, his voice wavering like he was fighting laughter.

“Only if they add a disclaimer,” Quarter countered. Saw’s laugh had gotten deeper and a bit softer over the years but it still had the same lilt to it that made it so uniquely Sawbones. Their laughter tapered off and the room fell quiet again but it didn’t feel as heavy as before. “Come on, sit. Kix and Aiden will be stopping by soon.”

“Great,” Saw grumbled but he still moved around the end of Quarter’s bed, dropping into the chair at his bedside with a grunt. He kicked his feet up on the edge, leaning back in the chair and crossing his arms, looking just as relaxed as he would in his own bunk. Quarter noted the way his eyes paused on the empty section of the bed for a split second.

“Comfortable?” Quarter huffed with a fond eye roll.

“Mm thanks for asking,” Saw sighed, shuffling down in the chair a little more. “When do you get the new legs?” Quarter did his best not to wince but the question wasn’t really a surprise. Saw had always been about as subtle as a detonator going off.

“Another day or two,” Quarter answered, searching for the remote to the little holoprojector on the opposite wall.

“Maybe I’ll get to see you upright before I head out again," Saw mused, shifting his attention to the holo playing in the background.

“I guess we’ll find out," Quarter sighed. He looked down at the remote in his hand before letting out a long sigh and holding it out toward Saw; his brother snatched the remote with a pleased sound in the back of his throat. “Asshole.”

“Dumbass.”

It felt odd to walk again. His body was going through the motions but there wasn’t the sensation of his feet on the ground. Quarter tried to ignore Aiden hovering at his side, even if he did appreciate his little brother’s concern. They had been working on his movement for almost three rotations and while he was still a little unsteady, Quarter could at least move around on his own. He glanced up when the medbay door opened, smiling when Kix stepped inside.

“You better not get any height advantage from those,” Kix teased, pulling his helmet off to smile at his brothers.

“Right,” Aiden exclaimed, throwing his arms out. “He can’t be the oldest and the tallest.” Quarter rolled his eyes but a bright smile spread across his face.

“Yeah, yeah,” Quarter huffed, half-heartedly swatting at Aiden before turning his attention to Kix again. “You heading out again?”

“Soon,” Kix answered, running a hand over the top of his shaved head. “Thought you might want to come to see Saw off.”

“I don’t know if you should walk that far,” Aiden cut in before Quarter could answer.

“Let’s find out,” he countered, throwing an arm around his youngest brother’s shoulders to keep himself steady. Quarter didn’t need to look at Aiden to know he was rolling his eyes, especially when Kix chuckled under his breath before following them into the hallway.

With Aiden’s help, the trip to the hangar wasn’t difficult, although it was a bit slower. He was a little taken aback by the rainbow of colors scattered around the hangar. Blue and gray armored men, with a bit of red sprinkled in, moved about, loading supplies into gunships that were heading back to their respective Venators while green and yellow-clad troopers just started to unload.

“Looks like the 327th and the 41st are back too,” Kix noted, his eyes darting around the groups of green they could see. Aiden let out a quick breath before he spoke again.

“3, 2, -”

“Quarter!”

“He found us,” Aiden chuckled, steadying Quarter when he dropped his arm. Jax broke into a light jog, weaving around crates and troopers. He was maybe ten feet from them when an arm wrapped around his neck, forcing him to scramble to keep his feet under him. Quarter tried to hide his smirk when he realized that the arm was connected to familiar gray armor. Saw proceeded to half-drag Jax along with a hilariously deadpan expression.

“Let go, Saw,” Jax growled, wildly flailing in the general direction of Saw’s head. When he finally released him, Jax stumbled, whipping his head around to glare at Saw even if it was hidden behind his helmet.

“Scary,” Saw stated flatly, arching a dark brow. “But your threats to put me on my ass will have to wait. I’m loadin’ up.” Jax finally took his helmet off and the five of them just stood there for a moment, soaking up the presence of their entire batch being together in person, even if it was only for a few minutes. Jax was the first to break the silence, letting out a soft huff before throwing his arms around Saw’s shoulders.

“Stay safe,” Jax mumbled.

“Get off me,” Saw grumbled even as he tentatively wrapped his arms around Jax’s torso. Kix stepped up next, smiling at his older brother, and Quarter couldn’t help but join in when Saw’s expression softened the tiniest bit. He did always have a soft spot for Kix.

“Talk to you soon,” Kix murmured, tilting his head forward. Saw’s jaw flexed, the muscle jumping under his skin as he leaned forward to gently bump his forehead against Kix’s. Aiden was next, standing ramrod straight in front of Saw, looking like he was going to salute him, and Quarter shook his head.

“Cut it out, shithead,” Saw chided, roughly dragging Aiden into a hug. Quarter could hear the faint wheeze of all the air leaving Saw’s lungs and could see the little smirk on Aiden’s lips before they separated.

And that just left Quarter.

“Be careful,” he warned gently with a half-smile. Saw just stared at him for a moment before taking a cautious step closer. Things were starting to look up between them and they were going to put forth an effort to talk more regularly but things were still a little awkward. There was a beat of silence between them before Saw moved to cup the back of his neck, squeezing gently. Quarter relaxed under his brother’s hand and watched the way Saw’s eyes flickered around his face before resting their foreheads together.

“I’m proud of you.” It was so simple, something that would’ve been nice to hear from anyone but it held so much more weight coming from Sawbones. The brother he always seemed to be out of sync with. Quarter may be the oldest but he’d always looked up to Saw.

Wolffe’s gruff voice cut through the hangar, yelling for Saw. Quarter lingered for a second longer even if his legs were starting to feel fatigued. Saw pulled away first, squeezing the back of his neck one last time before taking a step back. He grabbed his helmet from a nearby crate, offering the ghost of a smile at his batch of brothers.

“Behave, boys,” Saw called, offering a two-finger salute before slipping his helmet on.

“Move your ass, Bones,” Wolffe yelled from a gunship hovering nearby.

“I’ll walk even slower now!” Saw shouted in reply, striding across the hangar. Aiden, Jax, Kix, and Quarter watched him go, laughing to themselves as they listened to the commander and his medic exchange jabs. Quarter smiled softly, his eyes following Saw’s retreating form until the gunship doors closed.

Quarter continued to watch as the gunship exited the hangar and eventually became a dot amongst others in the skylanes over Coruscant. The war and his current predicament slipped to the back of his mind for a few minutes.

Quarter had his brother back and that was all that mattered. They’d figure out whatever came next.

Ragu list:

@a-single-tulip @wings-and-beskar @anxiouspineapple99 @secondaryrealm @dystopicjumpsuit @sunshinesdaydream @moonlightwarriorqueen @starrylothcat @starqueensthings @multi-fan-dom-madness @trixie2023 @wolffegirlsunite @clonemedickix @sev-on-kamino @dukeoftheblackstar @mythical-illustrator @commander-sunshine

#star wars #OC: CT-2697 Sawbones #OC: CT-2525 Quarter #OC: CT-9181 Aiden #OC: CT-7007 Jax #clone medic kix #CT-6116 #the clones wars #star wars fanfic

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lucifitzgerald · 1 year

Text

Luckily in the upstairs part of Luci’s home, the floor isn’t too bad. But he rips up some old one and replaces them, starting a pile of old boards in the hall downstairs. Aiden makes sure to pick up the nails and staples as he goes as well. And he’s a bit nosy but it’s quick enough, making sure everything is good as he moves around. He does take a minute to see how much Luci has done decorating and it is very nice, look better once it’s all done but in better shape.

He goes back and forth outside when he has to cut down some wood, redundant task but he stops every so often to chat with Luci. But then Aiden realizes an hour in that the boards downstairs are slightly wider than what he has and he sighs, trying to figure out a solution. And he doesn’t half ass his work, it’s not who he is. So he ponders for a few moments then decides to call his cousin to see if he can bring down some wider planks.

“So made an error,” Aiden says coming out of the front door. “The planks of flooring are wider than upstairs so I gotta wait for a little while until my cousin brings me different sizes. He’s out on a different job. Sorry about that.”

Luci manages to paint all the banisters, takes a few breaks to have some iced coffee and talk with Aiden. Admittedly, she doesn’t mind that he’s here, definitely in his element and quite handsome to look at while he’s...carrying wood. Sounds ridiculous--she blames it on the heat and the rest of the painting fumes. She sighs softly and settles down on the porch swing, debating how much more work she’s going to do before lunch.

She looks up at Aiden as he walks out, describing the mis-sizing error and she shakes her head, gently waving him off, “Oh it’s alright, no worries. You’re doing me the favor, you know? I’ll work with whatever timeline you need.” She laughs lightly. “Did you want anything to drink or--eat? I was thinking about making lunch soon.”

#rlakepara6: renovations

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aidensteddybear · 2 months

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Had this idea for a regressor Aiden and caregiver Riya fic I thought might interest you.

Basically Riya was asked to watch over Aiden much to her disliking at first, but during this there is a thunderstorm outside and after seeing how frightened Aiden is from it Riya shows her more caring side and gives him the comfort he needs and by the end actually had a good time watching over him.

Regressor! Aiden w/ Caregiver/Babysitter! Riya

Riya wasn’t exactly thrilled when James had asked her to watch over Aiden for a little bit. He had a bunch of errands to run, but he couldn’t take Aiden with him, due to how small he currently was.

Riya didn’t have anything going on today, plus she was pretty bored anyway, so she agreed. Her and Aiden were on better terms now, but they didn’t always get along, so Riya wasn’t sure how watching and taking care of him would go.

Luckily for her, Aiden was very calm and happy. Ever since she got there, Aiden had been sitting on the floor, near the couch where Riya was, and was just playing with his toys.

He was very quiet, besides his occasional giggling, and he didn’t really speak. He did say hi to Riya, but that was pretty much it.

So honestly, Riya thought that for the whole time she was there, she could just relax on the couch while being on her phone, since Aiden seemed occupied with his toys.

After a while though, the quietness in the room was suddenly interrupted by a loud crack of thunder. It had been pretty rainy out all day, but Riya didn’t expect a thunderstorm.

A second after the thunder was heard, Aiden started crying. Riya figured he was probably startled by the sudden noise and that he would calm down after a second or two, but he didn’t.

Aiden kept crying, before he eventually got on the couch with Riya and, much to her surprise, clung to her arm. That made it very clear to Riya that Aiden wasn’t simply startled by the noise, he was terrified of thunderstorms.

“You don’t like thunder do you, Aiden?” Aiden shook his head, hugging Riya’s arm tighter. The woman frowned as she began to rub his back.

Riya genuinely felt bad for him. Poor guy looked so scared about the storm and he couldn’t stop crying.

Riya continued to rub his back for about another minute, when she realized it wasn’t really calming him down that much. He still seemed very anxious.

So, Riya carefully picked Aiden up and placed him in her lap. Aiden looked a little confused at first, mainly because he didn’t expect to be put in her lap, but after a few seconds he did end up wrapping his arms around her and clinging to her.

“It’s going to be okay, Aiden. It’s just a storm, it’ll pass soon.” Riya told him as she began to rock him a little.

Soon, Aiden’s crying began to quiet down as he started to relax. Riya was happy that he was beginning to calm down, but the thunderstorm still wasn’t over.

After about minute or so, there was another crash of thunder. Riya could feel Aiden jump in her lap, loudly shrieking out of fear and surprise as he started crying again.

“Shh, shh.” Riya shushed him softly while gently patting his back. “Aiden, you’re alright, honey. You’re safe. I promise you, you’re safe.” She whispered to him.

Riya continued to slowly rock Aiden, which did seem to help him calm down a little. Aiden was quietly whimpering as he laid his head against Riya’s shoulder and continued to hug her.

It took a little over ten minutes for Aiden to become fully calm. Riya was hoping that the thunderstorm had ended, since she didn’t want Aiden freaking out again.

She didn’t move to check outside through the window, as she didn’t want to disturb Aiden, who seemed very comfortable in her lap. So, Riya checked the weather app on her phone.

It was still raining, but it did say that the thunderstorm had passed. A soft sigh of relief came from Riya, thankful that they only got a small thunderstorm instead of a big one.

Aiden stayed on Riya’s lap for a little while, until he knew for sure the storm was over. Once he knew, Aiden began to wiggle around in her arms as a way to tell her he wanted down.

Riya let go of Aiden, who crawled off of her lap and back over to his toys, which was only a few feet away from her. Though, when Aiden sat down with his toys, he looked over at Riya.

“Play?” He asked, gently pulling on her pants’ leg. “You want me to play with you?” Aiden smiled and nodded.

“Sure, Aiden. I’d love to play.” Riya said, smiling back at him as she sat on the floor next to him.

Having to watch over little Aiden was definitely not as bad of an experience Riya thought it was going to be. Actually, she kinda enjoyed it.

Aiden wasn’t bratty in the slightest, like Riya thought he’d be. Instead, he was the exact opposite. He was very sweet and calm.

Honestly, Riya wouldn’t mind watching over him again sometime.

#disventure camp agere #total drama agere #fandom agere #agere fandom #agere fic #age regression #disventure camp age regression #total drama age regression #disventure camp

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daysofrefuge · 2 months

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Favors

Original fiction featuring my ocs, Graham and Kingfisher, and @bellygunnr's oc, Aiden.

Graham's not sure exactly why he agreed to let the new guy drive him.

Maybe because he almost bowled him over on the way out the door, maybe because the next bus would put him at work in over an hour, maybe because he could imagine how mad it must be making Kingfisher. Maybe it has something to do with a sketchy new neighbor with an honest-to-god eyepatch taking him across the city.

He feels awkward now, squeezing into the guy's - Aiden's - car. It's ...seen better days. That's a little too generous, but he doesn't want to think about how it might give out on them on the way. He already feels self conscious and nervous since he's packed in like a tuna in a sardine can and the suspension dipped when he got in.

He fidgets. Leg bouncing from where it almost touches the glove box, Graham decides not to comment on the box in the back or the way the whole thing looks like its history could catch up to them at any moment. It's yellow, or it used to be. Bad guys don't drive bright yellow cars, right?

They also don't play nice and field questions from nosey kids or look touched from every nice neighborly thing that happens to them.

Senora had called him vago when she had Graham bring him a casserole that could probably feed 5 guys Aiden's size. Kingfisher had assured him she didn't mean vagrant. "More of a stray. We seem to pick up a lot of those around here." It had said and Graham made a face to the screen before stomping off to hand Aiden several more pounds of food.

Now that he was in the guy's car, he felt bad for being a little wary.

Aiden was nice, if skittish, but his stare was unnerving at first and he seemed to talk to himself. Not really anything bad, Graham had lived in enough cities and used public transportation, but the vibes were off sometimes. Something made danger ring in the back of his head. Sitting in the passenger seat let him study him discreetly, at least he thought.

"See something you like?" Aiden doesn't look up from the wheel, but works his jaw.

"Oh, sorry! I just, it's really nice of you to drive me. We barely know each other and you offered to take me to work." Graham exhales explosively. "Sorry, didn't mean to stare." He mumbles the last part.

Aiden seems to drop it, slouching a little and the tension in his jaw lessens.

"I mean it!" Graham says, because he never knows when to stop digging. "Saved me 40 minutes of waiting and then an hour on the bus."

Silence descends and both men seem to squirm in their seats. Graham fidgets and Aiden mulls over his words or scans the road for a spot to kick Graham and his big mouth out. Probably.

"I-." He starts and stops like he isn't sure of how to say what he wants to say. "If I'm not busy, and you need a ride to work sometime..." Aiden looks like he bit a lemon but is trying to make an offer despite the sourness flooding his mouth.

"I'll ask." Graham swoops in and nods. "And hey, if you need anything or ever want to grab a beer, I'm free! I mean I work days mostly, but it's nice to see another guy in the apartment, I mean not married with kids." Graham's blushing now, he's so bad at this. IT guys were not known for their social skills.

Aiden stops him from jumping out of the moving vehicle with a quiet chuckle. "Another movie maybe?"

"Hey! It was a good movie... To be fair that wasn't my idea." Graham huffs. They pull up to a stop light and he turns his head to find Aiden staring daggers at him. He probably doesn't mean it but he looks so intense sometimes. "Oh, uh. Yeah. Don't tell Kingfisher I told you, but it was worried and wanted you to socialize or get some air. It did the same to me when I first moved in. It's just like that."

"Hmm."

Graham slouches in the seat as much as he can and stays quiet for the rest of the trip. At least until Aiden breaks the quiet with a cough and asks where to go next.

It's not the worst ride to work he's had.

It is the strangest ride he’s had, by a country mile.

Graham directs Aiden to the lot closest to his building and thanks him as he gets out, only to whip his head around at the sound of the other door closing.

Aiden is out of his car and flipping his collar up as he scopes the area with his one good eye. He looks like a guy in a spy movie swamped in that leather jacket as he is. Graham is confused, but is in a rush and can’t offer much more than another thanks.

“Alright, I’ll see you soon.” Aiden nods and looks right through him.

Graham finds himself mirroring his body language as he fidgets with his bag and tie. “Yeah, sure man. Thanks again.”

He hurries to his building only to turn and have lost track of Aiden completely on the sparsely crowded sidewalk. The beat up old yellow car sits patiently in its spot, a reminder that this was real. He doesn’t think much of it because he has meetings with supervisors and new partner associates that want him to do the impossible. After several hours of grinning and bearing it, he shuffles outside towards the bus stop and the eventual promise of a shower. He’s not quite swaying on his feet as he fumbles for his bus pass on his phone when a honk makes him jump. He looks over his shoulder only to double take at the yellow monstrosity waiting for him. When Graham takes too long to react, Aiden pops his head out the window and waves. When Graham takes another moment to comprehend that his weird neighbor hung out around his work all day to drive him home, Aiden starts waving a grease stained paper bag at him and yells, “I got burgers.” across the street.

He can’t help the laugh that startles out of him and he jogs over.

“You’re insane, you know this, right?” Graham laughs as Aiden quirks an almost-grin. He’s so intense as he looks Graham over. “You waited this long for me?”

“I was in the area. Don’t let it go to your head, Donnelly.”

“And you got me dinner, why Mr. York, how am I not supposed to let this go to my head?” He pushes off the car door and slides into the passenger seat.

“You’re paying for gas.”

“Deal, whatever, hand me that bag” Graham waves him off and reaches for the bag of fast food. “I’m starving.”

The ride back is nicer than the ride there. The ice broken once again, and this time Graham hopes Aiden’s mood won’t refreeze when they head their separate ways. He also hopes Kingfisher won’t lecture him about this later.

Kingfisher sounds the tone it uses to denote it wants Graham's attention over something important. Its waveform dances on the screen by the door and he stops making dinner to walk over.

"Mr. York is asking for you." Kingfisher does not sound happy. It isn't usually happy when it brings up the newest tenant in the building. This tone was new, reluctant, but there's worry in its voice.

"At 8 on a Tuesday? Did he say why?" He asks. Graham scratches at his neck and waits, eyeing the screen with confusion.

"When I pressed, he conceded that he needed another set of hands. I believe he is trying to change some bandages, though I cannot see into that apartment anymore."

Right, because one Aiden York moved in, went radio silent for three days, and tore out all of Kingfisher's eyes and ears in the room he was assigned.

"Okay."

"Okay?! That's all you have to say?"

"He gave me a ride to work. He's a weird guy, yeah, but he's nice."

"I didn't realize that's all it took to earn your trust. Maybe I should reevaluate your survival instincts." Kingfisher snaps. It was mad now, more orange than blue and the waveform spiking as the audio fuzzed.

"He's a tenant asking for help. How did he talk to you anyway?" Graham shot back, already slipping on shoes and heading to the bathroom for his own first aid kit. It came with the apartment under the orders of the motherhenning AI who was now trying to talk him out of using it.

"He opened his door, stuck his head out, and whispered at the ceiling." Kingfisher admits.

"Uh huh. How'd he look?"

Silence from K told Graham the AI was pouting, that Graham was objectively right, and it was mad about that.

"I'll bring my phone. You can call if you think he's killing me in there. Pout over here while I go help one of your tenants."

"Fine."

"There we go. Thank you, Kingfisher." Graham leaves and doesn't bother locking his door. "Need to schedule a play-date for you guys. You could give each other a chance." He mutters.

Kingfisher locks his apartment for him with a harsh click and Graham waves him off as he ascends the stairs towards Aiden's place.

#original #Graham Donnelly #Kingfisher AI #Aiden York #Golftrot

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schoolbusgraveyard · 11 months

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last question of the day... (I still appreciate you taking the time to answer, sorry if I'm bothering you too much)

How would everyone react if Ashlyn suddenly broke down emotionally in front of them? (you know... start crying desperately or let your emotions flow, we only saw her do that with her father, but... what about the others who she sees as her friends? they've only seen her angry or frustrated, but They have never seen her cry...)

(I insist again, thank you for taking the time to respond... Have a nice day)

Oh, trust me--there's no way you could bother me at all, I promise! I physically can't stop talking about SBG so this kind of thing is super fun to me. It's super fun.

Like you've said, we've seen her have a meltdown (when she was going off about the change of plans/Taylor, Logan, and Tyler saying they were second-guessing the plan to get the jeep and go back to Savannah), but never really cry or be upset in other ways.

Gonna put this under a readmore since this is a little bit longer!

Aiden: I think his priority would be to try and comfort her. Hug. Bump his shoulder against hers and sit like that for a little bit while she lets it out. Pull her into a hug. Anything that she didn't move away from or push him away with. He's big on physical comfort and affection, but he's not really sure how to comfort her in terms of what to say or do--he wasn't around a lot of people growing up. I think he would also try to keep his voice low while talking to her when she's upset/bawling her eyes out. I think he would hold her as tightly and closely as he could until it all passed and she felt better.

Ben: I think he would be so, so confused and not sure about what to do at all. I think he would prioritize sitting with her and listening, but like Aiden, not be sure about what to say. I think he would sit close to her, offer her a bottle of water or a snack, asked what she needed, and then when she kind of settled, write or type up a "What can I do for you right now?" message/ask what happened.

Tyler: I think that he would freeze up, actually, if she started crying her eyes out in front of him. He's responded to her "moping", but he's never seen her breakdown and actually cry. He's used to seeing his mother or his sister cry, not one of his friends--and definitely not her, of all people. Once the initial freeze passed, though, I think he would silently get her a cold rag/tissues/something weighted/water and offer it to her and just let her cry it out while he sat with her and listened to what she had to say. After she calmed down/after she was a little more okay, I think he would kind of bully her (not in a mean way), though, in a similar way to how he called her "carrot-top" when she was distressed about what had happened to him. I don't think he would tell her to stop moping in a case like this, though--I think he would just try to use the teasing as a way to make her feel even somewhat normal again. Especially if she apologized for or seemed embarrassed about breaking down in front of him, he would just "what do you think you're apologizing for? having feelings? wow, you expressed a human emotion, something nobody should ever do" sarcastically.

Taylor: If they were at someone's house (let's say Ashlyn's, just Taylor and Ash alone for a minute), I think she would grab the nearest blanket and bundle Ashlyn up, and from there, I think she would listen to what Ashlyn had to say, and then try to find the most comforting/reassuring words to respond with. She seems to have a bit of a knack for that at times, it's honestly probably a skill she picked up after watching what her mother grieve a lot. I think she would keep her voice soft, and even if she were also upset, try to keep her voice steady.

Logan: I think he would quietly sit with her and hold her hand, if she were alright with it in the moment. He would tell her that everything's going to be alright, that he's there for her--and if she needs or wants it, everyone else would be, too. I think he would probably get a little overwhelmed by her feelings, maybe almost start to cry himself, but try his best to reassure her in the moment.

#answered #I hope you have a good day too!! Ty for all of the asks <: They've been fun #ashlyn #aiden #tyler #taylor #ben #logan #situations

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metamorphosisff · 1 year

Text

|Five| New Normal

This morning I woke up and decided that almost every piece of furniture in my apartment needed to go. When I first moved into this place it had not been solely mine. Mariah had a lot of say about how she wanted to present our home even when she no longer lived in it. Now I was ready for all reminders of her to be gone. There was no need to reminisce or ponder over what went wrong. The reality was that what we were in this moment were two people who shared a past and would never share a future. When that sinks in, the process of moving on becomes easier. That’s how I found myself roaming the aisles of a furniture store with both of my best friends in tow.

“How in the hell are we supposed to know what looks good?” Aiden asked, exasperated with the task already. “We both have all black and red everything. Typical nigga shit. I don’t know why you won’t just come back to the rivers and the lakes that you used to.”

“Because it’s childish bruh,” I said, eyeing another L shaped couch that was the color of royal blue which reminded me of a pair of Jordan one’s I owned. “I want my space to say grown man not fresh out of college.”

“I can respect that,” Rah says, eyeing the same couch I am. “He might not be useful, but if you like this couch, you can grab two of those box cushion chairs over there that are the same shade and do gray accent pieces with anything else you want in the living room.”

Aiden and I, whip our heads up at him with raised brows. We had been roaming for the past thirty minutes and outside of passing commentary on Aiden’s commentary, Rah hadn’t said any ideas until now.

He shrugs his shoulders before saying, “My girl love HGTV. That shit always on at her crib and I’ve picked up a few things.”

“More than a few Martha Stewart,” Aiden cracks, plopping down on the couch. “I fuck with the vision though. I think.”

“It’ll look decent, trust me. I know you not trying to do too much or be too simple, so this falls in the middle. Giving off grown man and fresh start,” Rah said.

“You definitely are all up under Keisha’s ass. Out here sounding just like her,”Aiden said, causing Rah to flip him the bird.

“Ignore is ignorant ass,” I said, slapping the back of Aiden’s neck.

“I do, like eighty five percent of the time,” Rah said.

“Man fuck both of y’all. Let me go find someone in a vest so we can get this makeover underway,” Aiden chuckles, popping back up to find an employee. He always has to be moving, idle tasks are hard for him to deal with so we don’t try and stop him.

Instead Rah takes this time to ask, “So I take you selling all of your furniture this morning as you officially being over Mariah?”

Out of the three of us, Rah fell in the middle, he knew when and how to ask questions. Aiden just said whatever came to his mind first and I often took too long to find my words or care in finding the right ones. With this whole situation Rah has not judged me for the length of time it has taken me to move on nor pressure me to start sleeping with any woman within a twenty mile radius.

“Yeah with her number blocked I feel free. That was the last tether and now I just don’t want any reminders,” I said.

“That usually does the trick,” Rah says with a nod of his head. “Now you can go out and find who you’re really supposed to do this life shit with because it was never her.”

It wasn’t until after we broke up that I found out how much my friends did not like her or us together for that matter. A part of me was not even surprised. Aiden sometimes let his disdain slip and Rah would avoid the topic of our relationship at all costs.

“How did you know?” I asked genuinely. I had been so deep in love that I missed or completely ignored the signs that something was off with our dynamic.

“She only liked fractions of you. Your masters degree, your professor title but the heart of who you are? She hated. She didn’t like you for real but held on because you look good on paper,” Rah said, putting words to what I had been feeling.

I nodded my head. “You’re right. I guess I always thought I could make her like those parts of me with time.”

There was no such thing as the perfect relationship and perfection wasn’t something I sought either. I merely thought that Mariah and I would have to work a little harder but over the years it became clear that we weren’t working together.

“You an optimistic nigga by nature X, ain’t nothing wrong with that but sometimes you have to take things at face value. There isn’t always a deeper meaning behind someone’s actions. It’s usually shallow as a motherfucker,” Rah said.

“That’s hard for me to do but I’m working on my discernment now. We live and learn,” I said.

“And even when we don’t, we have people to keep us accountable. Don’t sweat it. Now let’s go rescue that poor sales lady from Aiden’s dumbass,” Rah said, nodding in the direction Aiden was, trailing behind a beautiful woman wearing a vest with the store’s logo on it. From the look on her face, she was two seconds away from calling security.

“This nigga,” I muttered as we headed in that direction. “He had one job.”

“You knew deep down he wasn’t really about to be any help,” Rah chuckled.

“Got me there.”

I’m in my office combing through emails, sending updates to parole officers, judges, and lawyers. I have twenty minutes left to wrap this up before taking my next group out when I hear a knock on my door. When I look up, it’s the last person I ever expected to stand in my doorway. My eyes quickly rove over her frame. Today Jamila’s braids are pulled into a half up and half down style. She’s wearing khaki cargos and a sage green t-shirt that has the word dreamer written in bubbly cursive across the chest. Her eyes travel around the small space before meeting my eyes.

“Hey,” I greet, waving her in. “An unexpected but pleasant surprise. What’s up?”

We’ve texted on and off since last week's meeting but I’m careful not to be overwhelming with her. Our growing friendship is out of her norm and I’ve seen that coming on too strong triggers her fight or flight response. I kept it chill with funny memes or interesting articles I thought she might find interesting too. Her responses would range from short answers to multiple depending on the topic but she had yet to hit me up first. Had yet to seek me out. Until now that is.

“Nothing, I uh actually got here early for once so I thought I’d pop in,” she says, taking a seat in one of the two cushioned folding chairs across from the desk.

Things at HH weren’t glamorous as we were not one of the top non-profits but we made the best out of what we were given.

“Something tells me you have something on your mind,” I said, as she got settled.

Nodding her head she lets her gaze land on mine. I’ve observed direct eye contact is her thing unless her feelings are involved. Otherwise, she’s locked in on me as she asks, “The meeting…you said you started it. Why?”

“Sometimes I can’t talk to my friends. One is emotionally immature and the other, emotionally avoidant. I’m the only one who likes to try to regulate how I’m feeling,” I explained, as I tried to search for more context after seeing the unspoken confusion written across her features. I needed to show her the purpose of the group outside of my needs.

“I wanted to be able to talk to people around my age who also wanted to talk and have their feelings validated, making it easier to move on from the little and big annoyances of life. A lot of groups tend to be for trauma related issues but there aren’t so many for regular everyday people to commune.”

“How does talking about things help you?” she asked next, brows scrunched but not in their usual way. There is no attitude behind this expression, merely curiosity that swirls behind her chestnut gaze. I know my responses will probably determine if she ever shares in a group or if she ever returns.

“I’m somebody that overthinks every interaction because I don’t want people to be around me and have bad experiences. It’s unrealistic but it’s who I am. When it comes to my personal shit it’s ten times worse. It helps to workshop my thoughts instead of having them constantly play in a loop in my head. It also helps to have people who aren’t close to the situation. I get unbiased feedback which is invaluable,” I replied.

“That is a big draw but I don’t know. I grew up not telling my business for survival reasons so to go against that feels unnatural,” she mused, twirling the end of a braid around her finger absentmindedly.

“Well you don’t have to tell allll of your business,” I chuckled, causing her to smirk. She’s hell bent on not smiling but I don’t make it easy for her. “Just what’s relevant. What will make you feel better.”

“Is feeling better after sharing guaranteed?” she asks.

“Being that nothing in life is, no. Sometimes I walk away even more confused but that’s okay. Life isn’t in black and white, it’s the gray areas that kick our asses,” I said.

“You speak like a walking motivational poster,” she says, causing me to laugh out loud.

“I’ve been told I’m a tad optimistic a time or two,” I said.

“That wasn’t a shot at you, just an observation,” she adds quickly.

“I know,” I grin.

“How did you get so comfortable with being so open all of the time?” she asks, looking from the braid wrapped around her finger towards me.

“My Grandad always encouraged us to say the hard things because in his words ‘The truth might not be pretty but it’s better looking than a lie’ and hearing that growing up stuck with me. It’s less about me being open and more about me getting my point across,” I said.

She nodded her head again, taking in my words although I could tell by the pensive look on her face she wasn’t quite sure how to respond to them. It was time to lighten the mood.

“My turn to ask you a question,” I said, drumming my fingers on the desk.

Skepticism overrode her features then as she sat up straight. Her eyes squint as she says, “Go for it.”

“What do you think the best episode of SpongeBob is? I’m in a debate with my little sister. Personally the Krusty Krab pizza episode got it hands down but she talking about the episode where he ripped his pants,” I said, causing the sides of her mouth to lift as she looked off to the side in a futile attempt to stop the smile that was growing.

She thought I was going to ask something personal because I had been doing all of the sharing but I knew not to have that expectation. Trust didn’t come easy to her and I wanted to earn her trust in me over time. There was only so much words could do in this case anyway. Jamila needed to see.

Braids swish back and forth softly as she shakes her head.“Both of you are wrong. It’s the marching band episode.”

“That’s also a classic but I don’t know if it’s touching the pizza episode,” I said.

“Sounds like you and your little sister are close from what you’ve told me so far,” she said.

“As close as I can be to a fourteen year old. Sometimes she feels more like my kid than my sibling but that’s because I’d do anything in the world for her,” I reply.

“I know the feeling, trust. You see the handful that Papi is,” she says, eyes softening as she talks about one of the two people who know her the best.

“He’ll grow out of it. I used to be just like him at that age,” I said.

My family used to call me The Bodyguard with the way I would look after Sabrina and her sister Cheyenne. I didn’t like anyone around my older cousins so I knew how Papi was feeling. I was unknown, therefore a threat until he deemed I wasn’t.

“Oh Lord, I can only imagine the nuisance you might have been,” she says, causing me to chuckle. “Well if he grows up to land a good career like this, I suppose I can overlook the pain in the ass phase.”

“Wait…is that a compliment I hear?” I asked with a raised brow. “Be still, I think pigs are starting to fly.”

“Did you also hear the pain in the ass part?” she asks with a playful roll of her eyes.

“I’m choosing to focus on the positive. Keep up. So what is it you like about me again?” I ask.

“See now you doing too much which means that’s my cue to leave,” she chuckles as she pushes up to her feet. “I’m going to wait outside by the van.”

“You can admit that I’m growing on you. You won’t melt, I promise,” I tease.

“There you go being corny, ruining the moment,” she smirks, her eyes bright as if she would laugh if there weren’t the risk of others hearing.

“There you go acting like you don’t like it,” I countered, catching her gaze as she paused by the doorway.

Looking over her shoulder, she tosses a barely audible, “Maybe.”

I can’t call her on it because she disappears into the hallway the moment the word leaves her lips. It doesn’t matter though, I heard her clearly. I don’t understand fully why it makes me as happy as it does but I don’t want to pick it apart. I’m learning to live in the moment and see where life takes me. Right now I’m on a road that leads to Jamila and I’m intrigued at what I’ll learn along the way. As I gather my clipboard and keys to head out to the van myself, I think of more ways to turn that smirk into the smile she fights so hard against in my presence.

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#metamorphasisff #black romance #black fiction #slow burn romance #zendaya x mjb

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inhibitionfreewriting · 9 months

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slime + fluffy christmas? maybe decorating gingerbread houses

on one hand, doing traditional gingerbread houses would be sweet and in general the two of you love to spend time together. but this is the look of a man who would roast the shit out of your gingerbread house (but with love)

stay with me here, imagine getting all the things you need for it. you've got gingerbread panels and you're in the process of making the royal icing for it while slime pulls out a few bags of candy to use in the decoration - gum drops, candy canes, jelly beans, chocolates, basically whatever you two could grab from a local store. you question as the price reaches 75$ if you grabbed too much but slime shakes his head, "you need bricks to build." you agree.

i think it starts not as a competition, just deciding to do two separate houses so they can each look how you want them to look. you're probably going to break them afterwards anyway and just nosh on the sweet treat, but as soon as one of you accidentally knocks something off of the others and the response is a gasp and "sabotage", it turns into whoever can build the coolest looking house.

the problem is, both of you have different ideas of what would be the coolest looking house. slime is taking it too seriously and working on a gingerbread house with a complicated layout and interior rooms ("you're using too much gingerbread, you don't need to make an interior layout" "you're only saying that because you don't want to lose, give me the gingerbread") and you're working on patterns between the royal icing and the candy.

the BANTER? 😘👌🏻

"only a whore would live in your gingerbread house." "that just means i can live there and you can't." "woah, slutshaming? for christmas?" you give him this incredulous look before saying "you're not a whore!" before he gasps and goes "how DARE you!" it turns into this 15 minute long rant about how yes he is a whore and the fact that you're unwilling to face who he is down at the core of his being? the worst betrayal from you he's ever experienced.

you barely remember to take pictures before you start to break at pieces, sitting on the couch leaning into him and trying to find which ones highlight both houses the best. it IS a competition afterall, and who better to ask than the boys? he brings the pictures to the yard and its a small segment on the show to have them decide (it's important to note that you're not there)

when they pick his house (he doesn't say whose is whose), he immediately is defending yours and on your side. "hers is perfect what the fuck. what do you mean mine? look - the pictures just don't do it justice. you're all wrong"

"wait do you," ludwig shakes his head "do you NOT want to win this?" aiden is laughing

"lud doesn't get it. we want women to win," nick says "stop being misogynistic dude." lud throws his hands up in exasperation and shouts that he's NOT being misogynistic.

rewatching the clip on the yard makes your heart glow.

#anthony slime x reader #anthony bruno x reader #anthony slime #anthony bruno #the yard podcast x reader #bunny writes #christmas 2023

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abbysindistinctchatter · 3 months

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this is a piece i wrote about six months ago, after my friend made a comment about not wanting to go to the same college as me (ouch). it’s part of a larger collection i’m working on that chronicles the senior year of two friends, Gwen and Aiden, with one piece for every month. enjoy!

November

Gwen sat at the foot of the bed, putting on her black leather shoes. Aiden stood by the desk, packing his school supplies back into his bag.

“You look like you’ve got something on your mind,” he said, noticing her gently gnawing on her bottom lip.

“What? No, I'm fine,” she replied, clearly having been ripped from her thoughts. She was done getting ready to leave, but still she lingered. She crossed her arms over her chest as she shifted her weight from foot to foot.

“You sure?” he asked, a disbelieving look on his face. “You’re awfully quiet.”

She opened her mouth to speak, but quickly closed it when she realized she didn’t quite have the words. “It’s— hm. It’s just… earlier, when I made that joke about us going to Northeastern, your reaction was a bit… harsh. I don't know, that’s probably stupid.” She shook her head, as if to rid it of the thought, contorting her face in embarrassment. He stopped what he was doing, turning to her with a soft gaze, a bit confused.

“Oh. I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come off that way, but you know how I feel about college. It’s, like, the one time you get to explore an entirely different world, really step out of your comfort zone. The thought of sharing what should be an entirely new experience with someone I've been around for so long seems a bit… confining? I don’t know if that makes sense.” He rambled as he tried to make amends; he had always sought to protect her feelings.

Her stance relaxed as he said this, but she continued to mull over the previous interaction. “No, I get that. Don't get me wrong. It just made me feel a bit strange.” A small laugh fell from her lips. He couldn’t tell if it was forced. “I mean–you told Becca to apply,” she spat out quickly. Aiden rolled his eyes at the mention of her name.

“That's different and you know it.”

Gwen laughed humorlessly. “Why? Because she’ll let you fuck her?” She turned towards the door, wanting to avoid whatever confrontation she had inadvertently started.

“Gwen,” he reached out and grabbed her arm, pulling her back. “You need to stop doing this. I don't like you any less just because Becca and I are dating now. You’ll always be my best friend.” Despite his annoyance, his voice remained low and he stared into her eyes. Hers did not return the comfort.

“You say that, but then you act like—”

“Act like what?”

“Like you never want me around anymore! You stopped picking me up for school, you don’t sit with me at lunch, and you’re just… mean! All you ever talk about is how you’ve ‘never felt this way before’ and how she’s so perfect.” Her voice broke on the last word; as much as Gwen wanted to hate Becca, she was just that: perfect for Aiden. She stepped closer to him, hot tears filling her eyes. “I'm not into you, Aiden. I really do just want to be friends, but I need you to act like you want that too. I need you to at least pretend like you care.”

“I do care!”

“Then fucking act like it!” she yelled. A moment passed in silence, then another, and another until they had been standing there, staring, for over a minute. Eventually, Gwen’s face fell and she took a step back.

“I'm sorry…” She rubbed the back of her neck with her hand. “I should go.”

“Yeah, you should.”

She looked down, humiliated, and left.

#writing #creative writers #creative writing #writerscommunity #writers on tumblr #female writers #writer stuff #short story #original character #author #teen writer

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whumpdom · 1 year

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Andersen Men

Sicktember Day 3: “What happened to your phenomenal immune system, huh?”

Description: James is sick but Trent needs someone to keep him together.

Trent is 26 James is 25. TW for content; mentions of child abuse, assault, and panic attacks.

The drive back to his apartment is normally one of James’s favorite parts of his day. He turns up the radio and can drown out all the chaos in his mind. Today, however, the drive is proving tedious at best. There’s a deep-seated exhaustion sitting in his bones and the beginning of a headache creeping in. James rolls his muscular shoulders and tries to blink away the fatigue; the day isn’t over yet. Before he can go home and pass out in his bed, he needs to stop by Trent’s place and check up on him. Daisy and Aiden are out of town on some kind of “writing retreat”, and James had promised to check up on the young lawyer.

James pulls up outside of the rundown apartment building that Trent lives in and parks his truck. As he steps out, he winces when the throbbing in his head picks up slightly. He shrugs it off and walks towards the stairs. His father’s voice echoes in his head.

“Andersen men don’t take sick days, son”

The sentiment has held true for the most part, James can’t recall a single time his father missed work or church because of illness ,and James has worked through nearly every sickness and injury unless he couldn’t physically get out of bed. Save for the time he got a concussion during a training exercise, and was ordered to be on bed rest, James has never taken a sick day. He has on multiple occasions boasted about his ‘Immune system of steel’, something that is evidently failing him at the moment.

When James gets to the front door of Trent’s apartment, he pauses to clear his throat, before knocking. He can hear Trent on the other side of the door, pacing and muttering, it’s not a good sign. After a few moments, Trent opens the door and James’s concern immediately increases. His friend looks to be on the verge of a full blown breakdown. His eyes are blown wide and it’s clear he’s been crying. Trent’s lower lip is raw and slightly bloody from when he’s been chewing it. There’s some dried blood on his knuckles and James has no doubt he’ll find a new dent in one of the apartment walls.

“Hey man, what happened?”

James' voice is soft and cautious as he walks into the living room. Trent starts pacing again, looking like a caged animal. His shoulders are shaking and his breathing is bordered on hyperventilating. Trent doesn’t respond to James' question at first. James waits patiently, he knows how easily Trent can be startled when he’s like this. After a few minutes, Trent drops down on the couch and hunches over. He sucks in a shaky breath and then looks up at James with red-rimmed eyes.

“I, h-he was t-there. At the office today, Wilton Blakely.” Trent whispers. The name is unfamiliar to James, but it clearly holds some significance with Trent. “He c-came up to me and t-t-touched me. Kept going on about how great m-my f-father was.”James sits down on the couch a few inches from Trent and places a hand on his friend's knee to help ground him.

Trent chokes back a sob and swallows thickly. His eyes begin to dart around the room. James can sense the impending panic attack and he squeezes Trent’s knee firmly. “Did he hurt you?”James asks carefully. Trent shakes his head and leans into James ever so slightly. He sucks in an unsteady breath before speaking, his voice barely a whisper.

“W-when I was eight, my parents had some dinner party and I spilled some water on him.” Trent flinches suddenly, he can still feel the sting of the first slap and his cheek even after all these years. “I-I-I-I d-didn’t m-mean to, but it d-didn’t matter.”. Trent doesn’t have to finish the rest of the story for James to know what happened. He is well aware of the torment Trent faced at the hand of his ‘parents’ and it makes James feel sick everytime he thinks about it. James instinctively pulls his friend closer and rubs Trent’s back to calm him down.

“I probably deserved it anyway.” Trent says with a hollow laugh.

James shakes his head and hugs Trent. “You didn’t deserve it, any of it. What they did to you was horrible, but they can’t hurt you anymore. Alright?”James states firmly. Trent nods and slumps against James.

“Why don’t you shower and I’ll order some food?” James offers when Trent pulls away. Trent nods and stands up, he still looks rough and James has a feeling it’s going to be a long night.

While Trent showers, James orders food. He hasn’t eaten since breakfast, which is probably why his head and stomach hurt, and Trent can’t take his meds on an empty stomach. Italian food seems like a safe bet, so James orders some pasta dishes to be delivered and flips through the TV channels until he finds something neutral to watch. He settles on Parks and Recreation, which seems like a safe bet.

The food arrives shortly after Trent emerges from the shower and the two men settle on the couch and eat in relative silence. James isn’t exactly hungry, but he eats anyway hoping it will help his headache go away. Trent picks at his food, absentmindedly watching the show and occasionally cracking a shy smile at the jokes. When Trent has eaten most of his dinner, James heads to the kitchen to grab Trent’s anxiety and insomnia medication along with some aspirin for himself. James hands Trent his pills along with a bottle of water and watches as his friend swallows. Trents eyes are still puffy and far-away but he seems to be doing better. James clears away the food and tries to ignore the overly-full sensation in his belly. He really hadn’t eaten that much, especially considering his normal appetite, but evidently his stomach disagrees.

“T-thank you.” Trent mumbles when James walks back into the living room. James smiles and squeezes his shoulder,”No problem man.”, he replies.

They watch a few more episodes; Trent relaxes more and more as the medication takes effect. James, on the other hand, grows ever more uncomfortable. Dinner is sitting like a rock in his stomach, refusing to digest. Occasionally he can feel the food churning sickly and his belly rumbles quietly, clearly displeased with his choice to eat. Apparently what James felt earlier was not hunger, but rather the beginning of a stomach bug. James places a hand on his midsection and rubs at it discreetly. He can feel a slight bloat to his abdomen along with the queasy ache. Now that his brain isn’t focused on taking care of a panicked Trent, James realizes just how terrible he feels. A wet burp rumbles up his throat and he muffles it in his fist.

Trent doesn’t seem to notice his friend's condition, or if he does he doesn’t mention it. His eyes begin to droop and he slumps further into the couch yawning. The tension has eased from his shoulders and his breathing is calmer. James takes note and grabs the remote to turn the television off.

“I think it’s bedtime, yeah?” James asks, turning to Trent.

The young lawyer nods sleepily and stands up, walking towards the bathroom to brush his teeth. He turns back towards James and looks at him with sad pleading eyes.

“C-can you st-stay?”

James smiles at the request. He knows that Trent is prone to nightmares following a panic attack and he hadn’t planned to leave his friend anyway. Hearing Trent openly request it is definitely progress though.

“Of course, I’ll be right out here if you need me buddy.”

Trent’s shoulders relax even further and he walks into the bathroom.

Once Trent has left the room, James lets out another wet burp. It doesn’t bring him any relief and he presses his hand against his aching belly hoping to coax up another burp. He does, but it brings with it a splash of his dinner, which he quickly swallows back down. His stomach grumbles in response and cramps.

James stands up carefully and goes to the hall closet where he has a stash of spare clothes. It’s not the first time he’s spent the night here and it won’t be the last. He changes into a fresh shirt and a pair of loose sweatpants. The waist band digs into his puffy belly and James winces, rubbing tenderly and trying not groan when he bends over to pick up his other clothes. The action of bending over sends up another splash of acid and food into his throat. For a moment James thinks he’s going to puke, but nothing happens and he returns to the couch.

Trent has left a pillow and blanket on the couch for him. James settles onto the couch and curls in on himself. He hugs his bulky arms around his middle and squeezes his eyes shut. With any luck, he’ll be able to fall asleep.

For the better part of an hour, James tries to sleep, with no success. His stomach hurts and keeps making increasingly loud and distressed sounds. His head is throbbing, despite the aspirin, and perhaps worst of all; James is alone with his thoughts. Everytime he shuts his eyes, he can see Drew’s face or the face of someone else he lost. His mind is flooded with the images of everyone he couldn’t save and it only makes him more nauseated. This tends to happen anytime he gets a fever and James hates it.

Trent is sleeping soundly in the next room over and James really doesn’t want to disturb him, but he almost wishes Trent would wake up. At least then he would have something else to focus on.

Another cramp ripples through his middle and James bites back a groan. He can still taste dinner in his mouth along with the bitter saliva that keeps flooding in. James stands up, slightly unsteady, and quietly walks to the bathroom. He grabs his toothbrush that Trent keeps here and attempts to brush his teeth. The action makes him gag and James drops the toothbrush leaning over the sick to retch.

His stomach contracts as he gags but all that he manages is a pathetic dribble of bitter drool. He turns and kneels in front of the toilet, squeezing his eyes shut as the world seems to spin around him. Memories flood his brain and James grips the rim of the toilet until his knuckles are white.

His back arches and he burps, bringing up a gush of puke; quickly followed by another. James pants over the water; the smell and sight of his partially disgusted dinner makes him gag again. James wraps one of his arms around his middle and uses the other to brace himself over the toilet. His belly gurgles under his hand and contracts sending up another wave of vomit.

When he finishes, James flushes the toilet and washes his face and mouth, before returning to couch. He had hoped that Trent would stay asleep during his bout of sickness, but Trent is a light sleeper even when medicated.

“What happened to your phenomenal immune system, huh?”

Trent is sitting on a chair by the couch when James enters the living room. There’s a bucket next to the couch and a bottle of water in Trent’s hand. James flops on the couch and burps into his hand. Trent doesn’t comment but he looks worried just the same. James doesn’t usually get sick and Trent isn’t quite sure how to respond. “I would offer you my bed but I know you won’t take it. Just know that it’s yours if you want.” Trent says as James takes a tentative sip of the water.

When the water doesn’t immediately come back up, James takes another tiny sip and sets the bottle down on the coffee table. He settles on the couch and looks up at Trent.

“Thanks man, sorry for waking you up.” James says yawning.

Trent stands up and pats James shoulder awkwardly. “It’s no problem” he replies as he heads back to bed.

James finally manages to fall asleep, his stomach settling somewhat after having purged itself. His dreams are far from peaceful, but James can’t remember a time when they were. When he wakes up he decides that, just this once, an Adersen man is going to take a damn sick day.

I will edit later enjoy some James and Trent whump xx

#sickfic #emeto #hurt/comfort #whump #tw: abuse #tw: panic attack #trent walker #james andersen #tw: vomit #sicktember 2023 #submission

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