#I say this every few months but I'm actually going to TRY and relax a bit this time

[royalarchivist]

Whether it's already the 1st or still the 31st for you, Happy New Year everyone!

I've updated the QSMP VOD Timestamp Archive to include a section for 2024 timestamps. It's wild to think I've done this for (nearly) a year.

[roanniom]

mechanic eddie is so hot that id break my car on purpose to see him

The Tune-Up

Mechanic!Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Warnings: NSFW, 18+ ONLY, unprotected sex / PIV sex / semi-public sex, dry humping, really shitty and poorly research car mechanic details

So maybe you intentionally bought a clunker when your last car finally bit the dust. Maybe you found a perpetual lemon of a car that you positively knew would conk out on you every other week meaning you just happen to need to take it to the shop all the time. The shop with the hot mechanic who always has his greased up coveralls pulled down and tied around his waist, revealing the tattoos and muscle and sinew that you could look at for hours on end.

So what?

It's the fourth time this month that you have had to roll your hunk of junk into his garage, and you check your make up in the rear view mirror before hopping out, arranging your hand casually on your hip as you see him walking up, wiping his hands on a rag.

"Eddieeeee. It's making that clanking sound again," you call out in a sing-song voice. Eddie gives you a lopsided grin and sweeps his messy curls up into a ponytail, giving you the perfect view of his stretching pecs beneath his thin tank top.

"You know you don't have to keep abusing that poor car just to see me. You can just ask me out, sweetheart."

Your heartbeat leaps into your throat and your jaw trembles.

"I...that's...I..."

"I'm just messin' with you!" Eddie chuckles at your sudden speechlessness and grabs a wrench, kicking the creeper in front of him and flopping down on it to roll under your car on his back.

The moment he disappears you bite your lip to contain a groan. The man is just so fucking fine. You tilt your head to take in the flexing of his thighs - his lower half the only thing visible right now - under the material of his coveralls. Your appreciation is cut short, however, when he rolls out only a moment after.

“You’re staring, sweetheart,” he says with a cheeky grin, rolling back out from under your car but remaining on his back on the roller.

You look away abruptly at being caught.

“You know my car really does just suck and break and stuff,” you argue lamely in answer to his earlier question. Eddie barks out a laugh and rests his arms behind his head so he can relax there while staying reclined and looking up at you. It gives him a perfect vantage point up your skirt, but he keeps his eyes trained on your face.

“How do you know I don’t keep rigging it to break myself so you have to keep coming back here?” Eddie says in a lilting tease. Your gaze snaps back to him and he raises his eyebrows in a challenge. You feel your entire body come alive at the implication of his statement but try to calm your heart beat by remembering that he's always this flirty.

"Oh yeah? Angling for more chocolate chip cookies there, Munson?" you ask, referring to the fact that you'd brought him cookies as an additional tip during the last few tune ups. Eddie licks his lips and looks you up and down slowly in a way that has your stomach flipping. It's almost like he's considering something. His smile is large when it seems like he's made his decision.

"Angling for a kiss is more like it."

Blood rushes to your ears. If he said anything else, you wouldn't be able to hear it because suddenly you're feeling like you're going to pass out and your vision narrows to the point that he's the only thing you can see.

It's late in the day on a Friday and Eddie's the only one in the shop for closing. You know that. It's why you come on those days in particular, to ensure you get him all on your own. The garage door is open to an empty street that's far enough off the beaten path that you don't think any passersby will be ambling around anytime soon.

So you drop your bag, inhale sharply to hold your breath, and step forward so that you stand with your feet planted on either side of his stretched out legs. Eddie's smile widens with surprise that you've actually taken the bait, but his eyes widen even more when you drop down to straddle his lap.

He'd expected you, at most, to kneel down beside him and playfully peck his cheek. Worst case scenario you'd tell him off for his cheekiness.

But here you are, skirt fanned out around to obscure the fact that you are now pelvis to pelvis. You drop your hands to his chest, fisting fingers in his dirty tank top over the knot of his coverall arms tied at his waist.

"Do you want payment before services or after?" you ask, voice surprisingly steady in spite of the rush of nerves and excitement coursing through your veins. Eddie looks dumbfounded for only a split second before the cocky attitude is back. His hands find your thighs and grip you, holding you down against the most intimate part of him.

"How 'bout a down payment to start with?" he asks, sliding his hands up your hips and to your waist, most likely leaving the material smudged with grease. You don't care at all, of course. He could cover your whole body in grease if it meant you got to feel his hands on you everywhere.

So you lean down and bring your lips to his. Your initial intent is a quick peck. But after your mouths meet, Eddie's lips part to let out a sinful moan and suddenly one of his hands is cupping the back of your neck to keep you down on top of him. The peck becomes a kiss, and even that morphs into something a lot more dirty and a lot less dignified.

Not that there's anything dignified about straddling your mechanic in the first place.

"Wow. I never want another fucking chocolate chip cookie ever again," Eddie grunts against your neck once he's pulled away to give you a chance to breathe. You giggle but it turns into a moan as he proceeds to immediately suck a hickie into the skin of your throat.

"I'm glad this form of payment works - ah! Works for you!" you say breathlessly as he moves his lips up to drag and suck at the spot behind your ear. His hands grip your waist so tightly that you feel yourself sinking against him as snug as you can get, the pulse between your legs becoming more and more insistent.

"I'm sorry, but your cash is no longer any good here, baby," Eddie rumbles into your skin and all the laughter stops because in that moment you feel the heat emanating from yourself and from him and that is the exact second that you feel his hardness nudging against you.

You pull back to make eye contact, find him glassy eyed and kiss bitten and rumpled staring back up at you.

"Well I guess we can get that figured out when you finish the job," you whisper, experimentally swirling your hips. Eddie's feet plant more firmly on the floor to keep the motion from pushing the roller, and his now bent thighs create a slope that causes you to slide further down and into his crotch. You both groan collectively at the increased contact.

"I already finished actually. So we can discuss payment now," Eddie says, leaning up and capturing your lips again. You pull back a second later, however, when his words finally register.

"What do you mean you already finished?"

"I just had to tighten a bolt," Eddie says with a grin, lifting up the wrench he had abandoned at his side the moment you'd dropped down on him. Your eyes narrow and your heart skips a beat at the implication.

"How did you know that's all that needed to be done?"

Eddie's grin becomes sheepish, as you anticipated. He drops the wrench back on the ground and rubs the back of his neck.

"I might have....uh....left it a little loose after your last visit. Just to make sure you'd....you know. Brighten this shop up again soon."

You try your best to hide the massive smile threatening to burst out on your face. But you make sure to ask the first question on your mind.

"My car couldn't have, like, fallen apart on the highway or anything with that bolt loose could - ,"

"Oh fuck no!" Eddie cuts you off, gripping at your waist suddenly with how fervent he is in his need to assure you. "I would never have let you drive it if it was dangerous." He averts his eyes before looking back at you with humor sparkling in them. "Now did I want it to make a harmless loud noise so suspicious you had to come back in? Yes."

"Shame on you," you cry out without any malice behind the words at all. In fact, you're laughing and leaning down to kiss him again. Your eagerness causes you to rock up against him and before long, the two of you are back at it hot and heavy.

"Hey," Eddie says, attempting to pull back after a while. You, however, are the one to blaze a trail of kisses down his neck this time. He sucks in a breath and continues. "Hey. I get off in about a half an hour."

"Don't want to wait that long for you to get off. Want it to happen right now," you whisper in his ear before sucking his ear lobe into your mouth. Eddie's eyes roll so far back into his head at the action and the innuendo and you feel his hard cock positively jump against you.

"Can't do this while I'm working, baby," Eddie groans, though his hands actively contradict his words by gripping your hips and encouraging them to continue moving against him.

"Isn't my car the last one for the day?" you ask innocently. As if you aren't grinding your clothed pussy all over his erection out in the open in his place of business with the garage door open and the sun still out. "And you did such a good job fixing it."

"Holy fuck..." Eddie breathes. He had been the confident one. He had been the forward one. He's not sure when the dynamic shifted but dear fucking god he's not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. He does still try his best to at least attempt to be a gentleman, though.

"But I'll get you all dirty. Don't wanna ruin your pretty clothes." Eddie says this while biting his lip and sliding his hands down to squeeze at your ass. It makes you gasp and push down against him even harder, exactly as he'd hoped.

"I don't believe you," you breathe. Eddie captures your mouth in another kiss before shaking his head, distracted.

"What don't you believe?"

"I don't believe that you don't want to ruin my clothes. I think you want to get me all dirty," you challenge. Eddie lifts his hand to your face and holds your chin suddenly between his thumb and index finger, staring deeply into your eyes.

"You're a tease and I love it, sweetheart," he says with a chuckle that makes you preen. "But I need to know...what do you actually want right now?"

"You," you say, not even skipping a beat. Eddie's eyes become serious.

"How...how much of me are we talkin'?"

"All of it," you say, your grin spreading.

"Mother of fucking Christ," Eddie grits out before holding onto you tight and pushing off with his feet, rolling the two of you further behind his work bench, effectively shielding you from the outside world. You squeal at the sudden motion and cling to him, so he uses that to his advantage, attaching his lips to your pulse point. One particularly generous suck to your juggular has you keening and bucking down against him, much to his insane pleasure.

"Oh god. Eddie," you gasp. Eddie closes his eyes and furrows his brow.

"Yeah. Say my name again. Please." He attempts to soften the command with the nicety but you would have screamed his name for much less. You sit up more fully in his lap and help him untie the knotted arms of his coveralls, unzipping the last part of them and exposing the tented front of his boxers. He'd felt huge but he looks even bigger.

"Eddie," you whisper, making eye contact before rubbing your hand over his clothed length. His brow furrows even deeper and you could laugh but you don't. Just like you don't continue to tease him because you're teased out yourself. You need him inside you, like, yesterday. So you pull his boxers down and ogle the length and width of him. Everything you could want him to be.

"Can you...you wanna even the playing field here, sweetheart?" Eddie asks with a silly grin that knocks the wind out of you. You nod without even stopping to get too self conscious, swiftly unbuttoning your blouse and letting the two sides hang open, revealing your bra-clad breasts. Eddie groans like he'd been punched.

"You're a fucking goddess, are you fucking kidding me?" he says, as if you've personally offended him. You chuckle at that.

"I think the exhaust fumes in here have messed with your brain, Munson."

Eddie simply snaps the front clasp of your bra, releasing your breasts to that they fall out with a bounce. Eddie moans like a wounded animal.

"Exhaust fumes my ass. You are unbelievable." His hands immediately close around you, squeezing and weighing. "These tits are magnificent."

You scoff at his word choice.

"You're ridiculous," you try to dismiss him, but his fingers playing with your nipple makes it hard to concentrate on any emotion other than lust. You begin gyrating your hips in search of friction, the hood of your mound pressing up against his erection and creating much needed pressure, even through your clothes.

"No, you're ridiculous trying to pretend like you can wait for this dick," Eddie mocks you, noticing exactly what you're doing. You look at him, biting on the inside of your cheek.

"As if you aren't the one making me wait," you toss back. Eddie's eyebrows raise in a challenge.

"You're the one on top, princess."

You huff and immediately lift yourself up, dropping back down over him so that your skirt obscures his view. But Eddie doesn't need to see in order to feel the tightness of you lowering yourself down onto him.

"Holy fucking - ,"

"Shit!" you interrupt him with your own cry. While you're certainly turned on, it was absolutely absurd for you to try and fit him in without any preparation. Eddie is bigger than anyone you've been with before and he's instantly deeper than you knew was possible, thanks to gravity.

"Fuck, that too much, baby?" Eddie asks, immediately alert and clutching your hips, attempting to keep you balanced above him before your pelvises can meet fully. Fuuuck, he's not even all the way in!

"J-just.....oh god. You're just really big," you whimper. Eddie makes to pull you off him but you dig your fingernails into his arms. "No don't want to get off just - ah. I need a minute. Need to...oh."

You're entire body begins trembling when Eddie's finger begins rubbing circles into your clit. You shudder and then feel yourself sink down a little further on his cock. The attention to your sensitive clit has your thighs widening, your muscles relaxing and your pussy becoming wetter by the second.

"Relax. Mmmm there it is, good girl."

His words practically do more than the finger on your clit and you arch into him, rocking against him shallowly.

After another few minutes of these ministrations, you finally feel yourself growing impatient and increasingly turned on. Experimentally you lift up with your thigh, rising till only his tip is inside you, before sinking back down slowly. Your breath is punched out of you with a hiss, but another moment passes and soon you're able to do it again, faster this time. Eventually you work yourself up to a rhythm, bouncing yourself up and down his cock while his face screws up and his fingers dig into your thighs.

"Wanted this for a long time, princess," Eddie grunts out. "Every time you came in I imagined bending you over that hunk of junk you call a car and fucking you till you couldn't walk."

You gasp at his dirty admission and, feeling emboldened by his honesty, decide to be honest yourself.

"I always wanted you to take me in the backseat and fuck me," you whine. Eddie bucks up into you, the drastic motion causing you to both shift back and forth due to the rocking of the roller you're still precariously perched on.

"We're doing this again, you know," Eddie says matter-of-factly. You must look confused by his words because he continues on fervently. "I may have pictured you with this car, but I'm fucking you in a bed next time," he insists. "Okay maybe a kitchen counter if we can't make it to the bedroom, but either way you deserve a room with a closed door."

You laugh at his words, clenching internally and causing him to moan in the process. You're quickly brought back from humor to urgency when you feel his finger on your clit again.

"Yeah. Yeah we're doing this again," you practically hiccup.

Eddie pulls you down on top of him so that he can lick and nip at your neck, his hand still sandwiched between the two of you.

"Listen to the greedy girl. Already thinking of the next time I'll be inside her."

"You're the one who brought up the subject of a next time!" you accuse, but you lose your bite the second he bites into the side of your throat. He soothes the spot with a lave of his tongue.

"Cum on me, baby, and we can get to that next time sooner."

When you cum, only moments later, your cry echoes throughout the garage. The reverberating sound comes back to your ears and shocks you enough that you almost fall out of your ascending headspace, but Eddie's grunts in your ear and fingers digging into your skin block it all out and keep you grounded to him. This allows you to enjoy your orgasm and even benefit from aftershocks as he takes over and plows up into you, chasing his own release. His haphazard thrusts cause the two of you to roll back and forth on the roller. You cling to him to stay stable with all the movement, and your sudden tensing has you clenching around him so tight he has no time to warn you of his impending orgasm. He just calls out your name and drives his cock deep inside you, spilling out into with sputtering hips.

It takes a while for the proverbial dust to settle. Eddie's hand on your back is soothing, but you quickly realize that your thighs are over extended and your body aches from the strenuousness of your sexual activity.

"Easy there, princess," Eddie coos. He helps you up, his cock sliding out of you with the movement. Like a gentleman he slides your panties back over your dripping slit, patting the wet spot fondly, before dropping the hem of your skirt and shifting to guide you up.

You wobble on embarrassingly unstable legs.

"Jesus christ, what did you do to me?" you huff. Eddie encircles you in his arms and lets out a bark of a laugh.

"What did I do?! How is it that you never fully realized that you were on top?" he asks, echoing his previous sentiments. You help him pull his coveralls up to tie at his waist again and he graciously helps button you back into your blouse.

"Well next time I want you to do all the work," you respond cheekily. Eddie's eyes spring back to yours and for a moment you hesitate, wondering if his earlier words were simply born of the heat of the moment. But Eddie's looking at you like you hung the fucking mood and suddenly he's kissing you. Bold and ardently and with a lot of tongue that says everything he wishes to say to you simply with the press of wet muscle to wet muscle.

When he pulls away his lips are shiny and bruised and you're out of breath. He gives you a lopsided smile and scrunches his nose.

"Next time do I still have to fix your car, or -?"

You slap him on the chest and pull him back in for another kiss.

~*~

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Hoping tumblr doesn't cut off the actual end of the story!

[capslocked]

KINKVEMBER DAY: 6

[prompt: blowjob]

male reader x hyeju

12k words

“I mean, don’t you think,” Hyeju says, wagging a finger at you, “that when you suffer through a bad date, the world ought to owe you something?”

"Like what?" you ask.

"Better taste in women - maybe more orgasms; I dunno, a blowjob?" She shrugs. "The general idea is just that someone gets to cum."

You nearly choke on the air in front of you. "Jesus, Hyeju, warn a guy."

“What? I’m trying to commiserate with you,” Hyeju laughs. “Wouldn’t that be funny? Being able to kiss someone who actually, you know, might love you back, and at the same time. Imagine not hooking-up just to forget a shitty day. Sounds wild, right?"

"Utterly deranged."

"So wild."

-

The first time you hook up with your roommate, it’s because of genetics - though not in the weird, uncontrollable way your body gets rigid and sensitive to any pretty girl who wears nothing but a towel moving between her bedroom and the bathroom, or how her eyes might flick fast from your chest up to yours - or given that the absolute shape of her is a blessing from one god or another (benevolent, clearly). That's not why Hyeju and you find yourselves only a few months later grinding on each other after the clock ticked past midnight, making out on New Year's Eve.

No, it has to do with the fact that Hyeju's nearly failing the nine AM section of molecular genetics because she's spent every lecture doodling stars and planets and planets shaped like asscheeks and planet-ass constellations while everyone else writes notes or doom scrolls twitter or whatever and she is somehow simultaneously the only student who never slept with her face on the lab desk or missed an assigned reading and the only one who absolutely needs a tutor.

It's just cosmic odds that you'd be that one: her roommate, who shouldn't be talking so loudly in the library about sex (in a sort of non-sexy, Mendelian kind of way) or be thinking the kind of things you've started thinking when Hyeju wears one of her more sleepshirt-esque long sleeves, her voice getting lower as you rattle off, "fruit flies and thale cress, definitely, it's just an error of fate or chromosome splitting..." before trailing off into a question.

"This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me," she finally tells you. You listen to her sigh into the binding of her textbook, facedown. "I'm really going to bomb this exam."

You tap her hand twice with your highlighter across the desk. "Then you're pretty damn lucky, if you think about it."

She turns to you, smiles a bit. "Okay, point. The worst thing will be having to retake this stupid fucking class."

"Why didn't you ask for help or go to office hours if you knew you were... failing?"

"Maybe because doing anything more than the bare minimum to get through a class I don't care about is my definition of, failing," she mumbles. "Why didn't anyone tell me a single lab is worth half my grade? Or that the TA is this fucking unreliable? How is this the one thing, really, beyond the basics, that can't be taught by wikipedia, a wikihow article and a youtube video?"

You scoot your seat closer to her. "You really need to relax."

"Fucking tell me about it."

You turn it over in your mind a few times, capping the top of your highlighter.

"Want me to get you off?"

And it’s not like you really mean it, when you say it, which is the strangest thing: you wouldn't actually suggest it, normally, wouldn't mention it in passing and then leave yourself open to the follow up and cross examination; yet there it is, after three, four hours of cramming notes on heterochronicity and the sloshing of gametes - you actually did propose it.

Hyeju jerks up, surprised.

"Are you serious?" She looks around, nearly snorting. "In the library?"

The face you’re giving her makes her scoff.

“You’re absolutely nuts.”

You have character flaws; the inability to admit wrongdoing chief among them. Hell, maybe it's from your mother - or maybe all your brains are just scrambled by the fact that Hyeju's sitting there with her pen against her pretty lips, hair glossier than usual as she scans your face and makes your entire body feel like a reactor core in meltdown.

Maybe you can blame what comes next on that.

"I'm always serious. I'm asking a serious question," you whisper, closing the textbook and resting your elbows on top. You look around quickly, like you're sneaking something in instead of this perfectly reasonable exchange, the perfectly platonic - except maybe not so much - way for friends to help each other.

"And I'm wondering what you're asking." Her cheeks are definitely pinker, you think, or the way it fills out her face, from the bottom up, is just that easy to imagine.

“I’m saying you haven’t gotten laid in months.” Here, you realize, these blocks of mental logic that definitely weren’t there when you blurted it out start to coalesce into something solid as you go on.

And you hadn't been wrong when you thought no one had given Hyeju a helping hand in a long, long time: you've heard through the walls or the floorboards at odd hours of the morning that she spends far too long fingering herself to a mind-numbing, tear-worthy frustration that leaves her knuckle-deep but never, ever sated or satisfied.

"No one's around, you'll feel better. You said it yourself."

Not a work of your imagination here - her ears are fucking burning.

"Wait a minute." She pushes her chair back, away from you and your gleaming offer. It clatters on its back legs, and a librarian waves her finger in warning. You wave back, sheepishly, until she stops and Hyeju stands and moves away from the table to talk, hands crossed over her front.

She turns and asks in a hushed-down-voice, "how did you know - did you hear something last night?"

"You couldn't keep it down even if you wanted to, honestly."

Hyeju turns further and throws a glare at the library doors, because obviously her noisiness and their collective noisemanship, or whatever the hell the word is, is clearly the root of the whole goddamn problem.

"Look - if not, no big deal - but I'm just saying you'll probably get over it and at least think less about sex. Or at least the wrong kind of sex."

You expect her to turn, sigh, and ask if you've lost your mind. Expect her to gather her jacket from the back of her chair, take her books and stomp out the room. Or even burst out laughing at the insanity, before slapping your arm lightly, in playful retaliation - anything other than the serious look she gives you in return, tilting her head, pressing her lips.

She turns up at the ceiling for a moment, contemplating something. And it's cute. It's so very, very cute, how her mouth pouts as she considers the possibility, right up until she says, "okay, fine."

The moderate twist of surprise taking hold in your brow must be visible.

"Oh, don't tell me that was all talk. Get me thinking about the right kind of sex or whatever."

You laugh, which has the librarian staring at both of you - until the librarian stops staring and probably sees Hyeju sliding back into her chair, the full, pent-up weight of her concentration pointed your way, knees inching apart - you, and Hyeju waiting, your knee bumping into her inner thigh, leaning closer as the textbook hits the floor.

"Don't laugh."

"Not laughing, seriously. Not laughing," you stammer. “I just think you’re just full of surprises.”

She spreads her knees further and sits taller, looking right at you.

"So then, surprise me," and then presses her cheek to the crook of your elbow.

You slide your chair right into the space next to hers, nuzzling up into the space under her ear. “Keep studying, Hyeju, you’ve got shit to do.” And then you slide your hand beneath the waist of her sweats, knead the swell of her thigh until you find the seam where her leg meets her body, press your palm down on the place just next to her center, your thumb in the middle. All this perfect pressure.

"Fuck," Hyeju says under a shudder. She's breathing heavier when your hot, open-mouthed kisses start landing at her neck, and she probably tries to read her textbook for about forty-five seconds longer. But there's the clench of her jaw right as your middle finger begins tracing circles beneath the fabric of her panties, and her gaze is blurring until she can't tell the difference between an allele or your fucking name.

"Shh-shh," you quiet her, finger tapping harder, playing with the slick wetness beneath all those layers of thick cotton and pressing two fingers there until her knees part like they’re not interested in resisting at all. Your lips press a kiss to the shell of her ear and she tenses all at once, hand shooting up to cover her mouth.

She simply leans back, closes her eyes, and lets you take care of her.

“Okay, you’re right,” she says, shaky and uneven, “that really did take some of the edge off. Did we ever review - poly- uh, pol-polymers here?"

The sweatshirt sleeve falling off your shoulder is a hindrance to any actual reading; her shifting against the chair isn't helping either, but you manage to push down the thoughts of stripping her down completely and giving her your tongue as yet another distraction.

"What did the syllabus say? I don't know if we need to read too far on 'polymers'," you say, having going through an entire afternoon without considering this once, but as you curl your fingers and take an honest crack at cramming the remaining chapters into her head, the knowledge that no one else is getting her this wet - except for whoever she's got in her mind's eye at three AM - is enough to get you feeling a little dizzy.

-

It’s probably supposed to be weird, given that you’ve never gotten any of your other friends off spontaneously in the library, or there's the fact that you can't really avoid each other afterwards, how she shows up in a silk negligee when you're pouring coffee before sunrise to prep for another day and you have the opportunity to notice - yes, she has amazing taste in underwear, yes, you might not have really appreciated her chest and figure enough before - yes, fuck it. She catches you noticing that first time, after coming downstairs with nothing but one of her cropped t-shirts and her board shorts, and she smirks when she realizes you're still thinking about it that afternoon, when her foot grazes yours while you're both washing dishes, and she dries the plate in her hand with a slow swipe.

And it is weird, actually, to describe what’s going on between you in words. 

A few words, anyway, like a one-word label to describe what it was: friends or roommates-with-benefits, or - fuck buddies - god, it's even worse. Fuck buddies? Fuck friends? Something equally terrible and stupid that still makes sense, like something out of a shitty rom-com: it doesn't capture any of the rest of the myriad ways in which things can feel less or less friendly between two people.

So, friends was never, ever going to cut it. Roommates - although technically correct - is just this side of too clinical. And let's be clear: strangers don't wake up every morning together, walk to the same class, sit close together in the middle seats, secretly flick a strangers' skirt up in an empty lecture hall and get on their knees and work your mouth onto her pussy and watch the legs of the desks shake when her feet arch into the floor.

"The notes you've got are better than mine," is how Hyeju tries to put things, the next day and every time after that, standing in the doorframe, or at the foot of your bed and looking every bit the disheveled and hopeless mess you imagine she might spread out over the sheets of her own.

-

It gets complicated, which isn't really a surprise.

"You think your roommate is going to be home tonight?" is the question that comes up multiple times - from a revolving door of pretty names and faces. Hyeju has at least one opinion, if not more, on each of them.

"Tell Jinsoul I say hi," she says once, watching you get ready for a date, and you nearly bang your knee on the edge of the bathroom vanity. 

It's one of the more harmless comments she's offered.

Another, backhanded: "if you’re just looking for a blowjob everyday between lunch and our physics lab, let Hyunjin or Heejin or whatever-her-name-is know she's easily my favorite," Hyeju says on your way out one morning, still under her covers.

Or,

Hyeju's texted a simple "uh, Chuu? really??" when you mention, once, how much fun you've been having - and what kind, as you make a round of self-conscious and rambling phone calls the next day that land you with only one prospect for the night - but your roommate's also no longer being your roommate by the end of it, bouncing against your thighs in the bathtub and moaning something about please more and fuck or fucking make me cum; the details escape you a bit.

That's what friends are for, probably.

Still, in the same, bare-bones explanation, friends also aren't for falling asleep on you - or letting you hold her - or fucking you awake in the middle of the night. Friends aren't for pushing down your jeans when the early-morning dew settles on the back patio, or jerking you off in the seat beside yours with a sweatshirt over your lap when a group project is due later and you all should probably work on that and instead get yourselves off and leave the mess of what you're doing half-finished. Friends aren't, probably, for offering to watch you rub your palm up and down your cock the night before next semester's exams when you can barely sit in a single chair and you can't think about molecular biology or neurochemical transcriptions when your whole body aches to do the transcribing. (If you can catch that drift.)

The lists of who are and are not good enough for you goes on and on - the latter longer than the former.

So, there's Choerry, who according to Hyeju is 'straight up, a total slut'. Yeojin, who gets mistaken for your little sister enough times that Hyeju refuses to - in good faith - let you keep sleeping with her. Both Heejin and Gowon are apparently too pretty for you. "Kim-lip?" she asks, in the middle of peeling garlic, "is that one name or two?" And laughs into a bottle of beer, loud, while you're telling her to quit being nosey and watch her fingers with the damn knife.

"You have a problem."

"Why, because I asked a few simple questions? I think anyone would be a little curious with the -" she pauses to wave her fingers - "I'd be remiss to not be interested in the very drama that unfolds literally across the hall."

She waggles her eyebrows.

You look up at the ceiling. God save you, you think. "Hyeju."

("Seriously," Hyeju chimes in one evening, arms around you, and a mouthful of the dinner you'd cooked.

"You need better taste in girls. Don't waste time on anyone too dumb, or who drinks the milk straight from the carton, or doesn't wash her socks with the same load of laundry. Oh, and - no one who chews loudly. No one who can't tell you're going to cum. The worst is someone who doesn't know what you like, trust me on that. And remember the last rule: don't do anything with someone who eats at a really slow pace, it's incredibly depressing."

You rest your chin on her shoulder from the spot behind her. "Duly noted, oh Master of all Knowledge."

She sighs into your arm, but in the next moment, her voice gets a lot softer, her hips fidgeting slightly against you. "I just mean you're the kind of person people would want to sleep with again," she says, before turning to say your name and kiss you again and again as your bodies curl inward.

"I wonder what that means, Hyeju," you say.

"Fuck," Hyeju groans as you slide further into her, pushing her back into the sofa - hands on her shoulders, legs bent on her either side, "don't tease me like this.")

-

The first snowfall of the year is mild, a tiny dusting, nothing that sticks on the pavement in the alley or on the sidewalks - or the lintels - or in Hyeju's hair, but by evening, when the snow picks up and everything goes quiet, Hyeju has changed into flannels and wool socks in anticipation, curled up like a cat at one edge of the window ledge as the world begins to go white. It's enough that you even pull on a thicker sweatshirt, open up a book, and join her.

She turns toward you, quiet.

You've reached a point in the semester where this, the silence, doesn't unsettle you anymore. It's the space you fill up with time in-between, where you can see the contours of her body against the orange lamplight of the space heater, or watch her kick off the top half of the duvet at night as you fight over space in her bed and wonder about the bare skin peeking out from her shorts.

"Feeling bored?" She slides her foot a little closer to yours, almost imperceptibly. "Am I keeping you entertained enough?"

Her lips pull up at the corner. You chuckle.

"Oh, no."

She scoffs and puts her hands on her knees, pushes herself closer to the window sill and bumps her elbow into your shoulder. The bare skin of her neck and shoulders and face is getting a little redder as she cranes it forward. "Okay, if not, do you need someone to entertain you, maybe."

Your mouth twists, fighting a smile.

Hyeju is so close to you, you could kiss her really, really easily and not care how she'd feel about that. It's not a habit, not as often as it used to be, but every once and a while - she starts this game. Every once in a while, Hyeju just starts smiling like that, and leans into you like she's daring you to play along, hard round of chicken until it's clear what the two of you are doing with each other; the minutes pass by, one, then two, and then - maybe she pushes first, her leg on yours, or a kiss to your jaw or a palm on your back as she walks behind you - and then you'd turn and kiss her full on the mouth and pull at her clothes like nothing's holding you back.

She cocks a smile, and says, "why don't you go and call what's her name."

"Because."

You glance out at the cold, gray light outside. If you had a better understanding of any of the workings inside you, you could reach forward and tell her everything that's stopped you.

-

You're supposed to meet the girl-of-the-month at a New Year's party. Hyeju looks disgusted within the first ten seconds of the whole story.

"Heejin dumped you once, like, two months ago? For no reason."

"It wasn't a break-up. We talked about what we did wrong and we're doing better," you say, lifting one finger.

She glares, then, tilts her lips into this unamused purse that you can't take seriously at all when she starts walking back and forth across your living room, hands moving emphatically to the sides as she speaks, like she's in the process of unveiling a brilliant argument and is using both palms to guide your eyes toward the unquestionable logic. "God, you're the worst. You're just her easy fuck and you'll still answer her late night calls, really."

She leaves the rest unsaid - that she's just not that into you.

"I don't tell you which boys or girls you can call up," you try, putting on a boot. "If you'd like, I can. Name off the list, and make sure that the right name leaves my mouth this time."

Hyeju doesn't blush when you glance up, which is the surprising thing. No - her cheeks have grown a little more sullen, and she stares down at her socks in contemplation. You're in the middle of fastening up the lace and getting to your feet, waiting, wondering if Hyeju's going to continue this conversation, when Hyeju takes one small step forward.

And her hand goes out to touch your chin, thumb at your lip, fingers holding it in place - like you'll turn if she lets it go - the sharp shock of the sensation like a short circuit, before her knee comes between yours, and your body tingles, at the root and stem. "Hey," she says, eyes meeting yours. The edge of her nail flicking gently as she drags the curve of her thumb downward.

"Hyeju, please - I need to get going."

When you start walking toward your car, she calls out from the window. Something about how you better have the time of your life, fun for the two of you - it’s only fair.

(You feel, somewhere, a certain strange loss.)

"What, are you going to stay up and wait until I come back? Or am I interrupting your session for the night."

You can barely make it out, the smallest look passing over her face. "Maybe," she says, and then: "god, it's fucking cold."

-

New year's parties have this sort of quality of being simultaneously the most thrilling, exciting prospect on earth and the absolute worst fucking event in the history of the planet - depending on the venue, how egregious the racket is for a gin and tonic, the guests - oh, and the company.

Jinsoul and Choerry are both in attendance; in separate corners and in equal states of undress and intoxication, which seems fine by every present party, who are for the most part busy ogling one or the other in the full spirit of the New Year - as you would too, if the stars are aligned and Heejin hasn't already gone upstairs with half the guestlist, her arm wound with someone else's, as per her recent habit; if you haven't been tossed aside for any of the usual, less forgettable prospects and for something bigger, better and certainly much more enjoyable.

Which, if there were any way to track these things down with math, you'd already be reaching for your pen and notebook, as Hyeju would describe this sensation in a phrase she picked up from some podcast. Inevitable means necessary, or something.

"Good party," says Heejin, throwing back another drink.

"Yep. You said that," and you finish yours in one long draw, hissing through your teeth.

Heejin is a goddamn delight, of course, in all the simplest of ways. When she looks up at you - mouth pink, hair framing her face - she is so clearly and completely aware of what she is, and exactly what the world has in store for her, what it has set aside.

"Do you want to know what happened at the other New Year’s party we went to last year?"

"I - yeah. Hit me. Tell me all about (another date you were on) Heejin, that’s exactly what I’d love, let’s hear it."

She throws her head back and laughs, before starting into an overlong recount of her latest, greatest conquest, you on the outside. This is the thing - this is how a pretty face, with just a hint of a flirt, will make you feel for a beautiful, attractive, vivacious - absolutely shameless, raving sex-crazed lunatic of sorts who, apparently, loves to run around town and make a bunch of your closest friends fall in love and heartbroke-er, with every passing notion of her beauty, her charm - just the tilt of her chin, and some poor fucker is lost, absolutely lost.

 Even she knows it's a bad habit of hers. 

But who doesn't have a weakness? You've got plenty of your own - plenty, Heejin can admit - everyone does, in a way, and so Heejin, the other sloppy drunks milling about the party, and Choerry and Jinsoul all agree - someone like her just happens to have the best kind of weakness - so, so many of them, in fact:

"Can you believe how easily a few words get Jinsoul riled up? Or how it only takes a couple drinks for Choerry to pull up the hem of her skirt, not knowing the effect that'll have?"

And as for the last, and arguably worst kind -

"Hyeju, huh? What a great start to the New Year," is her final word. Heejin reaches across and downs your drink. Her expression turns just shy of grave, a pensive look. "Not your smartest idea, the living-together situation. Who in their right mind would put themselves in such a mess?"

"Thanks for the great advice." You wave her off, irritated.

There's another laugh before Heejin leans her face onto the table.

"Though maybe she's onto something, now that I think of it. Who needs anyone for the New Year?" and it's almost convincing the way her mouth, lined up with the rim of the glass, smirks when she drinks. "Mm. All a matter of taste."

-

The snow is halfway up your calves when you realize you need to find a cab at 11:30 PM on New Year's Eve. (Which, categorically, is the worst time to need to find a cab on New Year’s Eve.)

Or just:

11:36 PM and the nearest bus stop is too far away.

11:41 and the temperature feels like its dropped by fifteen degrees, like you should start wondering what hypothermia symptoms look like and what signs to look out for in yourself, your future wife and your children. You try not to think about why, but you get your phone out and immediately call Hyeju, so you're not sure what you think you're denying.

"No party?" she asks. Her voice is distant and sleep-ridden, but Hyeju's quick to pick up, like always.

"It sucked, I'm trying to find a way home early. Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year." There's a long pause, filled in by the squeak of snow beneath your boots. "Get a kiss?"

"Uh, not yet. In the market, I guess."

Hyeju's low hum isn't reassuring, either. "Well, you're kind of missing your window. Bad time to start looking."

"Says you, and here you are - still up for someone to spend the night with. Look at you," you respond, all this snark in your voice that she clearly hears. There's a long sigh.

"Actually," and Hyeju, much to the confusion of you and possibly the whole world, doesn't respond, and for a few seconds, the line goes completely silent, leaving you hanging.

She breathes once and comes out of her sleep with a yawn.

"I actually," she begins. There's a lot less preamble this time - this tone - and when she speaks again it comes through not nearly as sleepy, "was sorta wondering. Are you on your way home?"

"If I don't freeze to death, yeah."

"Yeah - no, yeah," and that's it. That's the sum total of what makes any difference between where you were a moment ago, and where you are right now, head spinning, fingers buzzing. Hyeju waits and there's the wind on the line, snow settling on your hat and in the corners of your face.

"I - sorry. I probably woke you up. Are you expecting someone else," you say, very small. Your foot drags behind the other. The cars whizz by you faster, passing.

"Hm. You're the only one, I guess," and after that - just static and the muffled sounds of her footsteps on creaky floorboards - or the tick of her ceiling fan? You can't make heads or tails of the rest of the background noise. All those words she said.

You bite your tongue to stop whatever curse words start pouring out from the jumble and cross streets, or the pedestrian underpass; snow gets stuck in your lashes and burns, but your chest is like a molten furnace. You consider telling her right there on the line, everything you're feeling - so hot, it feels like fire, Hyeju, I'm not used to getting heated and desperate and impatient - that even if you're not here now - just imagining your face - the sound of your breathing, it feels like I'm on the cusp.

"Yeah. Sure - good - okay, Hyeju."

"I guess, see you soon?"

"In a bit."

(It takes 33 minutes, trudging through cold and wet. It's all very dramatic, you think, and there's no one there to even watch you suffer for it, or - though you try not to think about that particular line - really, no one at all.)

-

You hear the way your key grinds in the lock - it's been like this, jammed since summer, when you pushed the front door in late at night a little too hard and something came undone and made a sound like a small stone tumbling down the world's deepest well. The hinge squeaks, and there's ice on the stoop, on the doormat, on every nook and corner you can see, all the way up your neck.

And your face, too. You shake off your hat, undo the buttons on your jacket, and pull off your boots before hanging them and all the layers to dry.

You can make out the outline of her profile at the edge of the door frame, right in the kitchen - barefoot, hip pressed against the island, pajamas - the dim lights illuminating the shadow of her head, hair over her face -

- but you don't pause. The next layer. There's nothing left to say. You're too cold for excuses, too smart to use the same ones you'd been taught, like: this is a normal, acceptable circumstance; everything, anything, will be perfectly normal if the two of us act as though that's the case; pretend we're both acting within the norms of reason, within our senses and logical thinking and I won't make myself go out in the cold a second more - won't stand for more than five minutes with your eyes looking like they're waiting.

So you move instead toward the kitchen, where the heating is better and she's already pouring coffee. There's a heat radiating out of the oven, and it smells sweet in there, like cinnamon and warm butter, and you wish you weren't still shaking, blood barely thawed, but there it is - her face, watching you - eyes gleaming as you wrap your hands around a mug, steam rising up - a shiver running up your arms; her knees skirting yours when she takes one step back and there's the cabinet door shut, then open again, and then a palm on your back.

Hyeju presses a cup of the fresh coffee, now warm enough to drink, to your chest, and says, softly. "What the fuck happened out there?"

She starts reaching out to wipe the frost and slush from your face. You let her hand hold you still, eyes wide.

"Oh you know," and her palm stays, even though it's obviously - suddenly - gotten warmer, and wetter too, and the longer she stands there and lets her fingers warm the pale bones of your cheeks, her wrist, the base of your forehead and ears, the more expectant the look on her face grows. "The usual."

Her eyes go as narrow as they ever can. For just a moment. "You're gonna die a slow, pathetic death someday, just for the record."

"Don't forget how this starts," you try, and feel your neck go warm, throat and breath tight. And not even when her shoulders shift, her mouth going smug - just looking at you.

“I mean, don’t you think,” Hyeju says, wagging a finger at you, “that when you suffer through a bad date, the world ought to owe you something?”

"Like what?" you ask.

"Better taste in women - maybe more orgasms; I dunno, a blowjob?" She shrugs. "The general idea is just that someone gets to cum."

You nearly choke on the air in front of you. "Jesus, Hyeju, warn a guy."

“What? I’m trying to commiserate with you,” Hyeju laughs. “Wouldn’t that be funny? Being able to kiss someone you actually, you know, might love you back, and at the same time. Imagine not hooking-up just to forget a shitty day. Sounds wild, right?"

"Utterly deranged."

"So wild."

When Hyeju sighs and gives a long, nonchalant hum, leaning her body closer, pressing up until her waist hits the cabinet top and you're pressed together chest-to-chest, she looks at you and her hips settle, the heel of her foot reaching around your calf.

There's that tingle. Again and again. You're not even trying to not think about what it might mean.

But then, you start, silently and unconsciously, trying to answer the question: why don't you, maybe. Why don't you, actually - Hyeju kisses you, pulls on the loop of your jeans and lets your lips brush the corners of hers and pulls away, suddenly, mumbling and head-turning. And just as abruptly, your nose buries in the space between her neck and her shoulder, where it's all warm. And when she puts her palms on your hips and squeezes and twists her knuckles into the fabric there, it seems she wants your hands up her shirt and under the small of her back.

And her hands - they're fidgety tonight, fingers curled up to keep their nails and the chill away, moving lower - one on your ass, while the other comes forward and begins rubbing circles, a handful of times - enough so you're letting a deep, low breath escape into the space just above her collar, your knee working its way between hers.

"That," Hyeju breathes, lips at your ear, hand reaching down to trace the hard curve of your cock pressing in the spot right between you, and there's that small rush again, familiar now, like you've caught a rhythm and she wants to feel it in its fullness: "is how you can make it up to me. For making me stay up. Worrying about you, god knows why. Waiting."

You're still half-frozen in a way, slowly thawing. "Hyeju, I've been trudging through the consequences of my actions this entire night. What am I about to suffer through now?"

"It's no consequence, honestly."

You squint.

"Just an idea, but," she breathes again; your bodies getting closer, and looking up at you, she grins and reaches down to touch the very root of you, her fingers drumming. You make a sound, and at that she says, her voice coming out thick, low:

"Want me to get you off?"

She squeezes again for good measure, just to be clear. Just a slight curl of fingers that's enough to send a flash of heat and the transient thought: why, why, why is she always wearing those fucking shorts, even in the winter?

Your blood thrums through the pulse at the end of your cock. You shake.

"Alright," is the response you let out.

And at that, Hyeju takes your wrist and leads you upstairs.

"There's that look. Don't worry. We'll find a way," is all she says as your feet walk forward, up step-by-step and higher and further up to her room. "After all, isn't that what we've always done?"

"It's usually whatever will make me stop talking."

Hyeju puts her chin on your shoulder. Her eyes follow the lines and shapes in the patterns of wallpaper as you turn onto her side of the apartment, and even through the wall and behind the doorway, her arm still around you, she pulls at your chin until your faces turn and you both can share each other's heat.

"Who, you and your awful habit of talking out-loud in your head while you work through equations?" and she brings her lips to yours, close and warm.

"Hey. Fuck you," and your voice breaks into an odd, low laughter when she kisses you harder.

"Yeah, I know," she whispers as her hand dives past the band of your boxers, palm sliding easily until she's gripping you fully and letting her fingers rub. She holds you there, in her room, her arm looped through yours, another arm resting at your belly.

And she stops there. She stays like that: holding your gaze.

"Look, Hyeju," you say, unable to not, though this can hardly count for anything; this, what you're about to admit, is nothing new. You swallow. "The thing is - you shouldn't."

"Don't want me to touch you?" she says, finger to your lips.

"Well, that's different. Maybe. Is there - maybe it's not the best thing to ask you right now."

Hyeju considers for a brief moment and tuts under her breath. "Can you at least do me the decency of waiting until I'm done wringing you dry before you say shit like that."

And she moves then, toward the bed.

So:

No. Yes. Maybe. Who knows, you tell yourself. Maybe, but only because you'll do anything if it makes you feel less sick, like a creature standing over its own skeleton - an abandoned shell; a relic, something to be feared and disgusted, as you let her go between your thighs, kneel beside the bed.

"I mean - since when - have you felt," is just as far as you're allowed to go before Hyeju presses her nose into you and pulls you out of the thin, cold fabric - palm, thumb, all those slender fingers swiping over your head - and now there's just the smell of her room and the shock, the buzz that runs down your spine and settles somewhere, somewhere inside the small and desperate movement of your hips and the tension building just below.

And god, fuck, Hyeju’s lips.

These soft, wet, pouty fucking things that could suck you straight off if you were feeling any less stupid or inexperienced or sentimental - if she wasn't solely intent on teasing it out of you first; a slow drag of the tongue up the underside; the tip of it poking, tracing the rim, like she's figured you out, just where to lead you. She's ready to smoke you out - always - until you're not taking in a breath every ten seconds but starting to close your eyes to the overwhelming, needling pleasure, too sharp, the way she knows you like best.

"Now you're finally - mm - starting to sound hot," and that smirk comes back to the corner of her mouth, teasing the sensitive belly of your cock and tracing her tongue everywhere. "With the voice and -"

You're losing track, her thumb and fingers circling the whole length of you - just, one after the other - mouth a hair-breadth away, her breath hovering like a promise.

"- that face."

"Don't, fucking tease me-"

The sound of your cock going in is like nothing else.

Wet and filthy in all the right ways.

Just the suction in her throat has your eyes nearly roll back into your head - Hyeju's gaze calmly watching the terrible sort of helplessness that washes over you like this: her lips wrapped around, bobbing - her hair falling into the wet mess of her mouth and sticking there. Hyeju likes being a little sloppy, likes feeling that spark run up the length of her tongue when she slides. It's the wet and the heat that gives everything away.

"I don't have much of a choice -" her jaw and chin is smudged when she pulls back off of your cock, mouth glossy and glistening, "and honestly, wouldn't it be a better use of our time, or my talents if I actually do that thing?"

“Which is?”

She looks up for a bit and sighs, the flush blooming pink to the tip of her ears and into the rounds of her cheeks and all across her neck. "Since, as far as I can see, what you really like - is, oh I'm just spit-balling here," and she stops just to bite her tongue and look into your eyes, "it's letting the girls take care of you? Isn't that right?"

You want to tell her, no, not always, that it's not as though you enjoy giving control completely - that that would be completely and unarguably, the opposite of true -

That most of the time you love it when the person you're with is a little bossy, a little crazy for you. You know some guys really get off on a strong woman and maybe, maybe if a girl's pretty and dressed up, and - sure - a little wet, but that's hardly -

“You know I’m right,” she says, a flicker of mischief skittering across her features. “These walls are paper thin.”

You want to tell her, perhaps remind her, that she likes someone in charge just as much as you do - to be taken care of, told what to do - to have a hand curled up around her throat and the other at her tits while a guy fucks her the right way and takes the reigns when she needs. So who are you, when it comes to knowing her better? And who, really, are you fooling?

But before you can get any words in: Hyeju dips, lips parting where the head of your cock throbs, and then disappears; and the hot wet warmth, enveloping all around your shaft and back; the curve of her throat contracting.

You moan - a lot, and louder this time - into the whole feeling. The way her fingers work the distance from the base, twisting and twisting and twisting into the pout of her lips; or how the sound is like nothing - a whimpering, messy sound - almost a whine and definitely not a slurp as your cock sinks further and further, until it's all one big, heavy throb.

And it's like Hyeju can read your thoughts, the visual you have of her lips screwed tight around your shaft - cum leaking from the corners, and her eyes scrunched up tight, as she looks up to watch your face unravel - this perfect image of her taking you, all of you, swallowing each drop as your hips start rutting up into her and - and - and.

Or else she gets impatient, because then Hyeju gives one long pull off the tip of your cock - saliva mixed in the precum there, and that shiny string of fluid hanging, caught in the middle between your bodies - a disgusting and irresistible sight. Her jaw slack, lips swollen and full, and her mouth gone wide open, wanting.

"Fuck - that's good. Don't stop," you start to whimper, desperate, at the sight, the smell. Her hot breath coming quick over the red wanting wetness left behind - then touched by the cold air - fuck -

She slaps your cock to the corner of her lips as she speaks.

"Can you believe what's going on down here?"

"God, can you -"

"And to think most guys wanna jump straight in. That or fuck a load out between my tits."

"Hyeju, shit, come on -"

She kisses the soft tip, right where it’s most sensitive, rolls it along her lip. Then, back down the length of your shaft where she's generous with her mouth inch after inch - lapping, licking, laving - and Hyeju begins working her way down and downward, nestling in at the edge of the bed and between your thighs.

Your eyes blow up the first time she dips low enough to put your balls in her mouth. 

“Mmhm,” she hums.

It’s killing you and she knows it; it’s killing you and she can feel the pre-cum leaking from your slit - the thumb she has moored there, keeping everything right where she wants it, running circles up the length with such little intention - she could bring you to the end just like this. 

"Am I supposed to believe it?” she asks out from beneath the shadow of your cock, looking up at you with her eyes all wide and brilliant - pupils dark as sin. “That not a single one of those girls ever did you proper?"

You curse under your breath. Hyeju seems amused, at least, like she can't help but love doing that to you, which is almost worse and honestly the sexiest thing a girl can be. You groan - wanton, raw and desperate and feeling exactly what she wants you to feel when her nails drag along the dip of your hip bones.

"Did they not leave you fucked-up the right way?"

Her wrist flicks out these twists and turns, making your spine bend to her control. Like even when you're sure to be bundling her hair in your fingers and fucking the whole length of your cock down her throat, all of this is the worst kind of power-trip for her - not the other way around.

Her tongue runs through the tangle of your balls, slowly, lasciviously, as though the plan is to memorize and map every detail. 

And the worst part is, how much it's making you desperate for the warmth of her mouth - where she'll run her tongue up and down and over and around and inside - before sucking you off nice and slow.

"Or maybe," she laughs; another flick to the top and then suddenly her hand goes faster and the fist pumping the rest of you tightens. "They left you so needy you're resorting to having the bestie suck you off so that you won't be desperate the next time you date. Oh my god-" 

Hyeju breaks into this fit of laughter, and you're nearly cross-eyed at the feeling of your entire existence - not just your cock - so wholly held within her mercy, and her pity, and you're breathing so shallow now you'd think this is the real reason people have died and will die - this exact moment where you're choking and stuttering at the edges, so very close to cumming and going absolutely bonkers with how good Hyeju is with her hands, her tongue, her mouth - everything - how much she's wrecking you, and your jaw drops, wide open, her name dripping like molasses off your lower lip.

"Are you going to cum?" she asks, curiously. All as if she can't see you nodding, collapsing under pressure, and then and there: "should we make it official?"

Her nose tickles the seam of your balls. And your toes begin to curl and uncurl - all this anticipatory, coiling pleasure burning from her throat, shooting from the pit of your stomach; the tightening spiral, twinging and stretching every nerve - as her lips enclose around the end of your cock, softly.

And oh, just excruciatingly slowly.

You watch the irresistible shape of her mouth travel down until her throat feels so incredibly, beautifully, and unbelievably tight, and then, just like that - Hyeju starts fucking herself onto you; pushing forward and down the full, rigid length of you, hard and fast - each time hitting deeper inside her - all that sticky, messy, wet squelching.

"Unh-unh, yeah. Unh. Mm-!" you say, or moan, or some animal version of that, maybe, it’s incoherent.

But regardless:

It's messy and your hands scramble for purchase in the sheets of her bed when you feel that snap, the tightening of a trigger; when your balls roll up and it builds, and builds, and it comes faster - harder and -

"Hyeju," you pant, and it sounds so, so filthy. "I'm gonna cum, if you - gonna cum-"

Hyeju pulls you free from her lips, quite possibly at the most final of final moments, to rub the base up and down, just right, between her fingers. Your cock is resting right on her cheek when it all happens. When she squeezes her fingers around your balls just enough to hear you wheeze and make a sound no sane man should have the right to. And fuck, you're cumming all over her face - or just one side of it - which is already just -

Okay, fuck.

She makes a startled sound and her fist closes tightly around your shaft when you pump another fresh load of white up onto her eyebrow.

"I'm, ah-shit," your mouth moves faster than the blood in your veins - and now the shame - oh god, the humiliation, it's pulsing right behind you. "Hyeju," you apologize.

Only, Hyeju has no interest in any of it. She doesn't seem offended or disappointed in proportion to how you're ruining her pretty face: "no, just do it, cum wherever you fucking like."

Which isn't what you're expecting at all, because Hyeju makes no effort to close her lips, let alone avoid any of it; nor is she making a fuss about the sticky mess in her hair, her mouth, nor as another stream of cum throbs from your cock, all tangled up in the long dark eyelashes that sweep down across her cheek.

It’s fucking filthy: you're cumming all over her and she's just kneeling there, telling you, "good boy."

See, she pushes through it, languidly - all those filthy sounds, and those watery little tears gathering at the edge of her eye and all of that, mixing up together until you're rolling your head back with your orgasm, shuddering, feeling weak - drained dry -

Except,

Hyeju's pushing a finger to your chest, kneeling up tall from the side of the bed. She turns her body toward the center of the bed and wipes a bit of the cum on her knuckles into the sheets. Here you feel like you've done something terrible or at least regrettable, like that last round at the bar when you have a test the next morning; a dick move, all of the sort that requires apology.

"You gotta give me a minute, if you're thinking about hopping on."

"Hmm. Sounds like a lot to ask."

"Wait," you grab her arm. Hyeju grins and there's nothing stopping the shake of your knees now, that weakness between your thighs: "let me get you a drink."

"Or."

"Or?"

Her tongue peeks out, running along her upper lip. Her eyes drop again, hands dipping below, beneath the hem of her shorts and oh. She slips a hand past her bra. The whole outline of it. And you -

"Mm, I could show you what that actually means." She lowers her chest, her breasts, and a lot of skin to the mattress while keeping your cock firmly in her hands. "That look tells me you wanna stick around a bit. Stay up past New Year’s, you know?"

You're almost unable to parse her words, there is so much to look at: the jutting curve of her chest, cleavage pressing into the mattress as her body settles between your knees. A soft chuckle; a sigh: "you are seriously the best lay, no-one else can get hard the minute after they just fucking exploded all over me-"

"Fuck, watch it," you hiss, because there's oversensitivity - and then there's Hyeju's mouth on the line of your cock, polishing you clean.

And it’s not that she isn’t trying to prove a point. Or that she's not trying to tease - that's an inherent quality of her character: a naturally dominant position with a high appetite for your lust. That much, Hyeju gets from you, whether you've got your head down between her thighs or the other way, too, so that her neck is arched around and her ass pushed up high in the air, legs open, and if she had any idea you would spend the next twenty minutes or more just going down on her, licking into her creaming cunt while two fingers work over her aching clit, then really, Hyeju would only encourage it - maybe get on top, force you to gag - and so you don't know where it comes from - how and why you want nothing more than to drive your fingers inside her and work her until she's a wet, squelching mess, not when this was always Hyeju's role of being the aggressor; and yes, sure, even the aggressed.

Surely not because you came so hard, still somewhat shivering with the remnants of a rather abrupt, painful, sudden and all-consuming orgasm.

"We're not doing anything else," she says, lips pulled up into a smirk right at the crown of your cockhead. But before you can respond she pushes a hot open kiss, and goes lower. She presses the flat of her tongue to the seam, just below the head. Licks a line right up to the tip and finishes with a tender flick that sends you fisting the bedspread in your fingers and leaning back as your mind begins to disintegrate -

"I'm not going to ride you yet, or going to get my hips in your hands so you can fuck my pussy real hard until I cry and pass out. Nothing of that sort is gonna happen." She licks one long drag of her tongue. Then, the other way. "I want to make this very clear: this isn't some huge favor - and if you want it - want it so bad, you can stay there and I'm going to do everything for you. We will get there - together," and with her voice shaking as she brings the wet, glistening skin of your cock just inside her mouth, she looks up. "We'll get each other off, just like this," and it's the deep, dark, throated moan that makes your thighs and all the nerves in between stiffen and buck when she swallows you again.

Hyeju's hands tug, pull her whole body closer still as it slowly bends, curves - her ass raised, her stomach lying on the bed. Her mouth takes you another few inches, until the tip of her nose is barely visible, but when she pauses to lick the cum still left over - the cum that's starting to leak out again - to breathe through it, then squeeze her palm and bob her mouth down, take another inch, until the sides are stuffed and emptying out again, that's when she finally has something to say: "got anything left? I'm a little starved."

"I. Christ, yes-" you whine, which doesn't help your case at all: the image, the image of you lying flat - back with Hyeju's head tucked between your knees, her hand pulling out your cock.

Sloppy, slimy-wet.

She presses an innocent, not-at-all-innocent kiss right to your tip, puckering - 

"You know what I did learn in that genetics class?" she muses, tongue flicking over her lips. Hyeju's about ready for a second helping - you're losing it. "When I first saw that DNA diagram - the double helix and all those little base pairs, and everything - it made me think of your cock. Your cock and me. Specifically our DNA. Did you know-"

She presses her palm over the head and rolls it - teases and strokes her palm - her knuckles - her fist - the whole nine. "When I hold your big fucking cock, mm, and just get it right - up in here, rubbing all along my walls - so deep, it gets me in my fucking ribs, makes me choke like I never been choked before, ah-mm," and it's this thought sliding toward the front of your mind, this perfect picture: Hyeju, getting fucked hard and open and stuffed full and stuffed good and stupid; you’ve got more than a few inches on her, can make her feel small and delicate; you know how to do her right.

But here you have Hyeju stroking the shaft - holding her hand tightly up near the head, rolling and twisting and sliding down and pushing her whole body right into the side of your legs: the soft, solid length, warm flesh and curves everywhere pressing into you.

You sit back, and just watch Hyeju with her eyes cool and composed, like half of her fucking face isn't streaked with your cum, mouth wrapped and looking fucking satisfied to be a total, gorgeous mess. She makes a dramatic display of kissing the tip again, just before telling you words you probably dreamt up at some point - either sleep deprived, or, during three AM jackoff, fantasizing. "Sometimes, just from riding your cock, I can't sit up straight."

"Fuck," and you feel your whole body run rigid, because apparently that's something you’ve been aching to hear.

You're covering her mouth again. White streaking onto her lips - where she's catching it in the well beneath her tongue and letting it spill out of the corner of her mouth. Into the crook of your thumb, which catches a drip here and there and rubs it down the length - down the curve - and pushes it back between Hyeju's pert little pout.

"Doesn't count, mister, just more pre-cum," she says, all with the audacity of a wink and smile; her words are a little garbled around the head of your cock between her teeth. And when you nod and realize just how painfully your jaw hurts, your throat becomes tight and raw, a knot pulling the underside from the center. Hyeju slides her lips lower, lower down, to the hilt and stays there, just like that - one hand holding down the flat of your belly to keep your hips still, her chin hanging - bobbing-as she feels every pulse, every twitching shift. You curl one hand around the side of her face, over the sharp edge of her jaw; rub a thumb into the delicate skin of her throat.

She shifts. You start to tell her what you like: how hot the rush comes when a girl puts her tongue against the slit at the very tip, and licks at the precum in nice, quick circles, soft and fluttering. And how her fingers shouldn't hesitate either, Hyeju's not even struggling to give it to you - god - just giving and -

She jerks her head up, swallowing down her next breath like it's one of her last. "I'm serious, if you're going to fuck a hole, start with my mouth - we can move onto everything else after."

"You're ridiculous -"

She meets her lips to your head, kissing once. Again. Kissing every inch, letting her mouth wrap around and then just - staying, just - staying like that and humming, with you, enjoying the fullness, the smell of you, the taste, the shape, just the weight and size and you.

There is spit fucking everywhere.

And if it's not clear what you're supposed to be doing - her fingers weave through yours, squeezing hard at the wrist and you can imagine: pulling her forward by her hair and holding her down while she chokes on your cock. "Fuck, Hyeju," you say, and your voice comes out way shakier than you'd like, "when, how did it get like this, huh? You always - always did, shit, always want your mouth filled."

"Never figured you to be someone who'd get turned on watching their friend sucking their cock like this."

"Doesn't everybody love the sight of their cock in a pretty girl's mouth?

"You were really convinced they weren't lining up behind you? Or anyone in the queue who can't keep their eyes off of this thing. Tell me, and try not to lie, try not to bullshit this one out: how many girls have you come home and fucked and creamed their brains out - then asked for the sloppiest, most -"

"Honestly."

"- Filthiest, nasty, ball-busting, gut-wrenching blowjob ever to make them think - to make them really start wondering what the hell it was you did - like it's gotta be something that leaves them so ruined, they can't ever not compare - can't ever not compare this moment, right here. Ever. When you give them the hardest fucking of their life, compared to any other guy - can't not, because no-one, literally no-one's cock can fuck like you do-"

"Fuck-"

"Any harder. Come on, seriously, tell me it isn't true. Come on."

Her voice - her fucking words, the tone she uses and how her words roll: honey-warm and soaking with sweet, thick degradation - she talks like sex, and that's exactly what gets you harder, like it’s something else; like it’s nothing, like it’s less, so much worse - you feel this guilty-dirty heat pool at your tailbone and push down the hard press of you throbbing all the way to her nose. And Hyeju smiles as much as she's capable around the fat, round stretch, humming around the warm taste of you, before opening wide and sinking her throat on it.

There's nothing like it.

You've got two fists in her hair; she's so tight and wet around every god-damn inch. Her cheeks flush - hot to the touch; her tongue laving in slow, long drags, slicking your shaft nice and warm until you're balls-deep and pushing her further: a small shift to the hips, a push here, a harder, faster pull, and Hyeju's feet behind her go curling like an angry cat, wanting the tug.

A long, satisfied breath slips from the hollows of her throat.

There are tears threatening, thickening her lashes, and though she doesn't choke - you're just afraid. Every sound that she pulls out, her eyes blinking up to you as if it's only natural to love getting used by her friend's cock, like the very premise of it - swallowing down the very shape of you, dragged over her tongue and brushing cum into the back of her throat - is something she can’t go without.

But this is nothing compared to the noises from where her lips are pressed tight around you, where you're hearing and even feeling:

That gluck, gluck - where her chest spasms just the slightest when her nose gets nuzzled right into your belly and you remember how much she likes to hear you talk dirty, how fucking wet it gets her. The heavy, deep breaths, gasps; the strangled moans when your hips just buck - the heat and the thrill, and this is better than every other time because there's just something in this moment -

"I'm not gonna come again, not like this. Not in your mouth. You can’t-"

But Hyeju refuses to hear a word; just pumps your shaft faster, feeling it's familiar hardness grow and throb and ache and retch, all her effort paying off: you're slick with precum and spit, hard and straining, the whole shaft begging for release - all because of her. And Hyeju won't stop, she pushes her cheek onto your thigh and then taps a hand there to pull your hips. The motion drives your cock further still inside her. Until it’s bathed in her spit, your cum, all this mess.

Until it's reaching, choking her, and the muffled sounds she's making are filthy and wet and so incredulously hot.

But god. Hyeju has something of a temper and a habit, too: with those big beautiful eyes and the perfect plump of her pouting lips, her tits swelling up around, when your grip slips on her shoulder, and her mouth goes tighter - how the pleasure begins to make you unbearably cruel and you push her away from you, only for a second -

She doesn't wait or seem to care; Hyeju follows the cock with her whole head and whimpers so hotly in her throat when it plops right back on her tongue. "That's more - more like - fuck, oh, there we go," her nose and fingers prodding.

You groan through a high, strangled whimper, a helpless shiver that turns into an uncontrollable roll of the hips - you can't believe it: she's already so thoroughly debauched and defaced; just fucking painted with it. Your cum dripping off her chin and rolling down her neck.

"Fuck - gonna make me - ah, Jesus -"

When Hyeju seems to have reached her fill, the feeling, you're cumming - pumping the length of your shaft. And the moment she feels you twitch and throb and that first hot spill lands in the bend of her mouth, it's as if she understands and holds herself tight - her legs going stock-still while your eyes blow up behind her, your cock spewing another and then another thick, milky load into her mouth, over her tongue: all along the topography of her throat - sticky cum landing in every ridge and valley -

Hyeju catches as much as she can. What little she can. You cum and pump and gush so much that when you're finally finished - done - every last drop spent and given - your cock throbs soft between her fingers; her chin is a complete and utter mess and her chest heaves with the sound of her catching her own breath. Hyeju groans softly and just swishes the load around in her mouth for a bit as if wanting to remember its feel and weight before lifting her eyes to look into yours. You can just barely see the color.

"Jesus, Hyeju-"

The entire bit of it, slick and shining-wet. With a small moan, a sound from the back of her throat: one swallow and the cum is gone, disappeared, vanished. She smiles like she didn't just ruin your entire goddamn life and, with her body limp and exhausted beside you - her gentle hand rubbing a flat stroke over your thigh before yours slips up to meet her chin.

"You," you curse and roll your eyes, catching the mess at the edge of her jaw, the very little left in the corners of her lips. You feed the cum over her bottom lip - her chin, her throat - watching your friend: Hyeju's throat, bobbing. "Really didn't have to," you start, but you realize just how useless a point it is to make.

She's smiling and biting and showing you what's left between the tips of her canines. "Do you always do this to the people who suck you off?"

"That's an awful habit. A pretty girl's lips aren't meant to get that messy," you reply.

"Oh." She frowns. "Well, I do a lot of things I shouldn't."

"God, seriously," and you think there's no greater hell, no sweeter pain than whatever's lingering in these little aftershocks - this fizzling and dying sort of pain, where the body is buzzed with all you're aching for. It's impossible to stop this train of thoughts, is the fucking feeling of her-

But just then, Hyeju rises to her knees, a new spark in her eyes, as she grabs ahold of your wrist and tugs you off the sheets, a few inches closer.

"And you," she purrs as she drags the palm of your hand across her neck and collarbone, collecting what remains and making the perfect image, "well - you are going to help clean me up, like you said before." She sits tall; the arch of her spine is pronounced - her back, so, very, slightly tapering, to where your hand slips right off the last of it: the wide flare of her hips. "Now isn't that the gentleman's thing to do?" she asks.

"Of course." You sigh, resigned and in desperate need of water. "Of course," you add and smirk a little and slip your hand lower, toward where her skin is getting hot, and her body, "let's get you clean."

"Mm." She's already grinning. "You know what wasn't in those textbooks?"

"Oh, I can only guess." You bite your cheek and start to lower yourself back. "Give it a try."

Hyeju drags you by the wrist toward the hall, the bathroom, ostensibly the shower -

"There's no way in hell you don't want to put a baby in me, like, right fucking now."

"Is that what we're doing?"

Hyeju makes a face like you're stupid - she might've grabbed a towel on the way out. She wipes her chin a little while walking - the corner of her mouth where, well - where it looks like a little dribble has somehow remained. "No. But you’re going to fuck me like it is."

-

(There's got so much on her mind. 

The door of the shower rattling in its frame as she struggles standing up against it. Getting fucked so fast and full, the feeling of both your hands cupped beneath the weight of her breasts. It's not the fact of where you are and your situation, per say - more about the immediate, the imperative nature. About fucking you. She was already feeling herself like, leaking the moment the door shut, so all that waiting, all that patience, really - and it's what drove her insane when you were, well: like that, after she put her mouth around your cock, made a right and proper mess of herself, and sucked you off.

Though there's less on her mind, clearly, when she cums all over your cock.

She's crying with her tits up onto the glass, your palm holding her ribs. Your cum-slick cock working itself hard again as it slips, back and forth, as you're fucking her open, spread apart. It's your finger in her asshole. That's what's on her mind then. How the press of your knuckle lights her entire fucking spine on fire - how the other hand finds her clit in all this, too, when you're no longer supporting the both of you but rather Hyeju is folding on her bent knee and trusting, on shaking and shivering, raw nerves, that you're not going to collapse.

"Fucking. God, please-"

There's the harsh slap of flesh - skin on wet skin, your palms against the sides of her ass and the curve of the breast. But otherwise - it's you, sighing - soft and gentle, like you can't get over the feel of her. "Hyeju, oh-fucking, god, fucking," is what you're saying, and it doesn't end up really mattering which one of you came last because she can feel you twitching, squelching in and out with how badly you're wanting to explode inside, but also you can feel her cunt absolutely begging, this fucking fluttering and clamping down on every thrust and the moment you manage to grind this angle she loses her ability to speak properly because you're not just, like - fucking her-

Just, absolutely, completely pounding her pussy, stretching her insides, dragging and sliding along the walls; each rough rub and thrust makes her knees quiver until her body is trembling and falling. But mostly her voice, the sharp gasp that shakes into her, how her nails are scraping the walls of the shower stall and she's saying - telling, crying and asking and wondering and pleading - just utterly astounded:

"Amazing," she huffs, breathes coming out cloudy and true onto the pane of glass, "you - it’s, fucking amazing.")

-

“And I am… Ironman.”

Your eyes flicker awake, hazy, as Tony Stark snaps his fingers, killing himself alongside Thanos’ army in the process.

The TV's long been running on background noise, though not as ambient. Its characters now bickering between the rubble and ruins and being picked up for the end credits. In the dark of the screen, you see Hyeju had nodded off and slumped over the side of your body. A new year means new beginning means resolutions and diets and gym routines -

Maybe no sooner than the sun can come up, apparently.

You lean over to grab your phone from the table: 4:14 A.M.

There's a lot of things you want to say, even more you want to hear, but your mind has begun to settle a bit - a lazy and dreamy thing that fills you with this sort of, tired kind of - not sad, or empty - no, of course not. That's hardly fitting; not after tonight. You want to wrap this in an idealistic sort of sentiment - maybe hold Hyeju close and let the hour carry you and the comfort be enough to forgive whatever there is to miss: like the fact, it's still really dark, so dark even outside. The moon reflecting off the sheet of snow on the street. And not even a distant dog barking, or car driving by or someone playing loud music in the early hours of the new year.

As the film drifts off into another set of commercials, you slip into an easy sleep that feels effortless. Your head drops, landing on the cushion by the arm of the couch, where Hyeju's hand begins to slip mindlessly across your belly, tickling your waist and causing you to slightly squirm - things are cooling down, but still a little agitated.

"Don't tell me you're waking me up, cause I just -"

She kisses the pulse at your throat and answers, mumbling half-words into the spot below your ear. "A kiss for a new year."

And maybe the world doesn't owe you anything at all.

Maybe it just gave you more than enough.

[stevethehairington]

Accidental Kiss Goodbye Part 1

Part 2:

Steve isn't so sure how he makes the rest of the drive to Family Video without crashing. It's all kind of a blur, how he manages to operate a whole entire vehicle in the state he's in once it hits him. Because after it does, his brain is just one big broken record of IkissedEddieMunsonIkissedEddieMunsonIkissedEddieMunson — absolutely no regard for speed limits and traffic lights and other cars.

He enters the store with his eyes glazed over and a faraway look on his face. Robin, of course, clocks it immediately, and she's worried for all of thirty seconds before Steve just blurts it out:

"I kissed Eddie."

Robin raises an eyebrow, the rest of her slowly relaxing when she realizes it isn't actually anything life or death (even though it certainly feels that way to Steve). "That's good, right?" She asks. "You've been crazy about him for months, Steve. It's actually kind of painful how head over heels you are."

Steve scoffs and ignores the dig, but he fixes his wide eyes on her. "It's not good, Rob," he grouses. "I didn't mean to."

Robin scrunches up her face. "Huh? What do you mean you didn't mean to?"

"I mean it was an accident," Steve tells her.

"An accident?" Robin repeats, amused. "Like — like you accidentally tripped and caught yourself with his mouth?" She laughs. "I don't—"

"No," Steve hisses. "An accident like I wasn't thinking and I just did it." And then Steve explains it to her, tells her exactly what happened this morning. How Eddie had grabbed him, how Steve had gotten so caught up in the moment, how he hadn't even hesitated, just leaned right in for a kiss like it was something they did every day.

When he finishes, Robin is quiet for a moment. Two. Three. Then she laughs. Hard. Like, doubled over, clutching her stomach, wiping tears from her eyes hard.

Steve smacks the back of his hand into her shoulder and whines her name. "Robin, be serious! I'm freaking out here," he says.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Robin says, swallowing down the rest of her laughter and schooling her face into something more sedate as she gathers her wits. "Look, Steve," she starts, grabbing his arm, just above his elbow. "I really don't think there's anything for you to worry about. It'll be fine. You just need to talk to him."

Steve frowns. "I don't even know what to say to him."

Robin narrow her eyes at him. "You could always, mm, I don't know, try telling him how you feel," she suggests gently. Tilts her head and smiles a little playfully. "I mean, accidentally kissing him goodbye is a pretty good excuse to finally get around to it. Y'know, since you've been putting it off for so long." She shrugs. Grins.

Steve huffs out. He knows she's right. She usually is. "Okay, but how do I even do that?" He asks.

Robin sighs softly and shrugs again. "You're asking the wrong person for that," she says. "I'm hopeless. You know that. But you're not." She knocks her shoulder into his, snatches up one of the tapes from the counter and gives it a little shake. "And you've got the next eight hours to figure it out."

It's going to be a long shift.

The second Steve's shift — his long, tortuous shift — is over, he's out the door. Hurries straight to his car and drives right back to Eddie's place.

He parks, kills the engine, then just sits there. Staring at the door of Eddie's trailer. Psyching himself up.

When he finally gets out and walks the short distance across the dirt and climbs those few front stairs, he stops on the doorstep. Hesitates again. His stomach feels like it's twisted itself into knots, but he pushes past that and knocks before he can talk himself out of it.

It feels like years before the door finally swings open. And there's Eddie.

"Steve," Eddie says, and he sounds surprised to see him.

"Eddie, hey. Uh, can I— can I come in?"

Eddie just nods and steps aside so Steve can shuffle past him.

They sit on the couch together, side by side. It's a little awkward, a little stilted, the slip up from this morning clearly at the forefront of both of their minds. Neither one of them seems to want to be the first to acknowledge it.

But the silence is unnerving, and it grates on Steve enough that he finally just blurts out, "I kissed you."

Eddie snorts, but instead of making some brassy comment like he usually would, he just parrots back, "you kissed me."

It gives him nothing, is the thing. Eddie has been very stoic, since letting Steve in. His face, usually so open, so expressive, has been carefully blank. Not giving anything away. Like maybe he's just as nervous about how this conversation is going to go.

It's a bit unsettling. Steve has no idea where Eddie's head is at. So, he figures it best to start with an apology.

"Sorry," Steve tells him, and that must surprise Eddie, because his head jerks up, eyes flickering over to Steve. The skin between his eyebrows pulls together briefly before smoothing back out, but Steve catches it. He sees it.

Eddie chews on his lip. Studies Steve from his sideways glance. Then very slowly, very quietly says, "you don't have to be."

"Oh?" Steve says.

Eddie shrugs, shifts a little so his shoulders are squared with Steve's a little more. "I just mean... I didn't— mind it."

"Oh," Steve breathes.

"You could... you could probably even do it again," Eddie says, blinks over at Steve through his eyelashes. "If you wanted."

"Oh."

Eddie laughs then, soft and fluttery from the leftover nerves of his confession. "Jeez, Harrington," he starts, "is that all you know how to—"

He doesn't get to finish that thought, though. Because Steve cuts him off with a hand to his jaw, curling beneath his chin, drawing him in, and then he's kissing him again. Properly, this time. Not some fleeting, accidental thing, but a firm, purposeful one.

Eddie sinks into it, and Steve kisses him the way he's always wanted to — slow, sweet, deep enough to curl his toes.

When they break apart, Eddie's eyes stay closed, but his mouth chases Steve's, body swaying after his. He's breathing a little heavy, and Steve has to bite back a grin. He did that.

Eddie blinks open his eyes, big and wide and dazed. "Oh," he says, and Steve laughs.

The apples of Eddie's cheeks are rosy, and they're close enough that Steve can see the feint freckles that dot the bridge of his nose. They pop against the pretty pink of his blush.

Eddie shoves at Steve's shoulder, huffing out a laugh of his own. He doesn't let Steve go far, though, holding onto his arm.

"Jesus," Eddie says, laughing again, this giddy little thing, and he wipes a hand over his face, tries to hide his smile behind it.

Steve grabs his hand, pulls it back down so he can see it. He loves the way it lights Eddie's face up.

"That was nothing like this morning," Eddie says.

Steve shrugs. "Wasn't really thinking this morning," he replies. "I just, y'know, did." He thumbs over the side of Eddie's hand, likes how their palms feel pressed together. "I guess I got so caught up in the moment that I just — didn't hold back. I just let myself do what I've wanted to do for a really long time."

The corners of Eddie's mouth twitch and his dimples come out to play as he tries to stop himself from grinning even bigger. It doesn't work, and Steve doesn't keep himself from brushing his thumb against one of them.

"Y'know," Eddie says, catching Steve's wrist. "it's kind of dangerous, what you did this morning."

Steve raises an eyebrow. "Is it?"

Eddie nods. "Oh yeah, real dangerous. 'Cause I could really get used to that," he tells Steve. "Making you breakfast. Fixing your tie. Kissing you every morning on your way to work."

Steve's heart skips a beat in his chest as he pictures it — waking up tangled in the sheets with Eddie. Sharing toast and coffee and sleepy smiles over the table, playing footsie under it. Almost making himself late because Eddie keeps pulling at the clothes Steve's only just put on, trying to get him to take them off again. Hurrying out the door, but not before he stops to give Eddie a kiss goodbye. A kiss see you later. "A regular little housewife, now, aren't you?" Steve teases, chuckling.

Something sparkles in Eddie's eyes, and he leans in close. "Darlin' if you kiss me like that every time, I'll be anything for you."

Isn't that a promise?

And what better way to seal that promise than with a kiss?

So Steve does.

[1nephthys]

Okay, First, I love your writing. Second, could you please make and imagine base on grey's anatomy? Like, I'm rewatching grey's anatomy, you know when Derek loses that pregnant patient, and then he goes into exile in the forest, and when Meredith goes to the forest saying that she knows about the wedding ring and she wants it, and then he throws the ring in the woods, and afterwards he laments that he lost her. I love that scene, I need an angst similar to this for Charles, I don't know, it might be inspired by last year when he flies to Monaco and binotto had to pick him up. With fluff in the end pleaaaaaase

The ring.

Thank you so so much, also thank you for the request! It took a second and I changed it a little bit but I hope you still enjoy it!!

Part 2!!:)

Word count:~4.9k

Warning: my English and as requested - angst; little, tiny suggestion of smut.

Four years ago.

Charles' mom stood up with a smile on her face announcing that it was time for her to do the dishes. She prepared the biggest dinner she ever had done before when her son finally decided that he want to introduce his girlfriend he was talking about for so long. She had always seen those sparks in his eyes when he was bragging about her.

"Let me help you." Y/n stopped herself from adding "Mrs. Leclerc" as the older woman told her not to do it because she felt old.

She also stood up but Pascale touched her arm and said "You stay there sweetheart, you are our guest tonight" She said to the girl with warm tone "Charles will help me." She looked at her son right beside y/n and he stood up and pick up both of their plates without any protest.

Y/n got herself in conversation with his brother, Lorenzo about something while her boyfriend was washing the plates in his mom's kitchen. "And? What do you think about her, mama?" He asked quietly, afraid that his girlfriend might hear from the other room.

"I don't know. I just met her but she seems really lovely. And with the way you look at each other, I feel like I will have to like her" She answered his son and it made him so happy. He might had a few girlfriends before and he always asked his mom for her opinion about them but never once her answer was this satisfying.

"I think I'm going to give her the ring dad gave me." He told her. They were dating only for a few months so his mom was actually terrified, even though her son looked like he was really in love. The ring he was talking about was really important to Charles because his father brought it for when his boys find the right girl. He noticed every thought on his mother's face, so he added quickly "Relax. I'm not planning to propose now... But when it's the right time, I really love her mama. I just feel it's her"

His mother could just smile at his statement because she - as well - felt like this is the one for her son.

---

Back to the present.

"...and Charles Leclerc finish his home grand-prix right behind the podium, at 4th place!" Everybody could hear through the speakers. Everybody in the Ferrari garage cheered, not for Charles but for Carlos who manage to finish second in this race. Y/n on the other hand knew, that her boyfriend wanted more. She was there before race, when all he could talk about finally starting from the pole position and having the win within his reach but his team failed him.

He got out of the car, mad to the point that he didn't even want to scream and yell at anyone, just stay quiet. He didn't even go for a hug with y/n like he ALWAYS does after race. He just wanted to finish his interviews and go home.

And that was exactly what he did. He told the interviewer about his disappointment, trying to control himself with the rest of the faith he had in his team.

He took a quick shower as y/n waited in his driver' room. The drive home was quiet. Y/n didn't forget to congratulate her boyfriend but when all she got in response was quiet "thanks" and glossy eyes she knew that he didn't really want to speak now. She decided to wait 'till he was ready to talk to her.

"I'm going to take a shower again" Charles said. Both of them knew that this shower was just an excuse to spend time alone and cool down. Before he had gone to the bathroom, he checked his phone, which was on the dnd since his warm-up back before the race.

Hey mate, congrats on P4!

We have to celebrate!

There's an afterparty in *name of the club* you have to come with y/n!

He read all three messages from his best friend, Pierre and he really, really wanted to throw his phone out of the window at the first one.

"Pierre asks if we want to go to the afterparty" Charles asked y/n looking at her with his phone in his hands.

"We can, only if you want" She answered, still worried about her boyfriend mood.

"I will tell him we will be there." He said while putting his phone down and heading straight to the bathroom, before y/n had any chance to say something.

She decided it was best if she also took a quick shower in the guest bathroom of their house and started getting ready. She put on some makeup and a comfortable, yet pretty outfit and she was ready to leave. She was ready but the shower was taking Charles longer time than usual so she decided to knock gently on the door.

"Charles, sweetheart? It's already 8 p.m. Just letting you know" She said through the dark wood. What she did not expect was her lover opening the door with an angry face.

"Jesus, will you at least let me shower in peace? Or I can't do that too?" He asked her angrily, passing her on his way to the bedroom to put on some clothes and leave. She didn't even answer him because he didn't give her time for that and she wouldn't had know what to say anyways. "We can go" He told her, grabbing his keys and walking to the car, without turning around.

She let out a long breath and stopped herself from saying anything, as she knew it was already a rough day for him. Even though his cold tone hurt her a bit. She already knew that she wasn't drinking tonight because he was going to get wasted. She closed their apartment and sit in the passenger seat.

Charles got to the club pretty fast but all the drivers were already there most of them on their third drink. As always, he passed his car keys to y/n and she put them in her purse. They entered the club and Charles went straight to buy drinks.

"I'm not going to drink tonight. You feel free though. I will be with the girls." She told him. She for sure will keep an eye on him but she had mixed feelings and was afraid of him attacking her again. So, she kissed his cheek and was off towards Lily and Kika that were dancing together on the dancefloor.

She greeted both of them and she was glad that it was just like every time they were at a party because she really didn't feel like explaining that her boyfriend was mad at her for a bad race result.

It was already some time at the party and Y/n's mood was actually better now, she had a great time with the girls. Charles also seemed like he was having fun, he definitely did not want to save any money on drinks.

It was around 1 a.m. that y/n noticed that he was leaving the club so she quickly grabbed her purse and said her goodbyes to go after him.

"Charles! Charles!" She yelled after him as he was walking in the opposite direction of their house and totally ignored her. "Charles, wait! I can't catch up!" She yelled which made him stop in his track.

"Maybe I want you to not catch up, huh? I just want you all to leave me fucking alone! Today was shit and I don't really need more of your shit on top of it!" He yelled back.

"Charles, you are drunk, let me take you home, and then you can be alone all you want. Please, c'mon." She said quietly. She was actually glad that he tried to run away from her because at least they were far enough from the club that people outside can't hear them over loud music. Now he might not care about it but he would when he sober up and read headlines and messages from his PR management.

"No. I'm not going with you anywhere. You can go back to having fun with the girls" He said with a mocking tone. He never seemed to mind her dancing with others when they were at the party together so she was surprised at this. "At least you will leave fucking alone. You know what all of this go fucking nowhere. I thought you would be there for me but I feel like I can't count on you, too" He said.

Oh.

"Charles, you can always count on me, I'm here whenever you want to talk to me. I thought that wasn't what you want. And I'm so, so sorry for misunderstanding you. Please, let's go home and talk." She tried again. She actually felt like shit but there wasn't much she could do now, when he was this drunk.

"No. I'm not going anywhere with you." He said and reached into his pocket taking out a beautiful ring, the one his dad gave him. "You know what, I was so fucking sure you were the one to get it..." She knew it, she knew it for years, she just waited. "But fuck this stupid ring, because I can't imagine someone else wearing it and for sure not you now." He finished his sentence by throwing the ring in whatever direction.

Both of their eyes were on it for a second but they both lost it before it hit the ground. She stood there. Stunned by his words and stunned by him throwing the ring that was so important to him.

"Go away." He added, as if what he just did and said wasn't enough. She didn't know what to say or do. So she did actually turn around and started walking in the opposite direction, to their shared apartment, holding her tears for dear life.

The walk home took her longer than usual, on her way she was repeating everything in her head. When she looked through her small purse she noticed his car keys which suddenly made her feel guilty, she just hoped that someone would help Charles get home safe, even after he hurt her.

What she didn't know, was that Pierre was already there. He also was bloody worried about Charles, so he get out of the club not far behind her. When he noticed she started walking in her direction and Charles in totally opposite, right after he threw away the ring he told him so much about, he knew he needed to run after his best friend. He had a few drinks too, but he definitely felt better now.

"Charles!" He yelled. And this time, Charles actually stopped and break out in tears.

"I lost her mate, I'm so fucking stupid" He put his palms on his eyes, to stop the tears from running down his face but there was no use in it. "And I lost it too!"

"Charles, you know she won't give up that easily. And you still have a chance in the championship. You did not lose it yet." Pierre tried to cheer up his friend, he put his hand on his shoulder.

"I'm not talking about championship, mate. The ring. Why did I even do it? I will never fucking find it, I was just so angry and-" His cries were getting worst and worst so Pierre decided to call for a taxi before somebody take a picture that would be all over internet by tomorrow morning.

'Charles Leclerc crying outside the club! There's no more alcohol for him!'

'Charles Leclerc lost the chance for the championship and his long-term girlfriend in one day! That man must had f**k up in his previous life'

Yeah, that was not something he should be dealing with in one week.

He texted Kika too, explained the whole situation, and told her she could stay and he would ask Alex and Lily to get her home later but she said she want to go home too.

All three of them get into a taxi, Charles still sobbing, now also telling the couple about all his happy moments with his love. "I told her I can't count on her. While all I fucking did this whole day was throw mean comments at her. Or comment. I didn't talk to her the whole day. And she still tried to get me home. Because she was worried about me. I'm the worst boyfriend ever. Now probably ex-boyfriend actually. I lost the girl of my dreams mate, I waited so long to ask her to marry me and now I fuck all of this up. Four years mate, four years. And I never once regretted any second of it. But now she probably thinks I am." The car stopped. "I will never forgive myself, so how can she forgive me?"

"We are here." The taxi driver said.

Pierre and Kika thanked the heavens for that, because the drive never felt this long. Pierre paid the driver, with an apologizing, small smile hoping that the old man will not told the media about what just happened in his car.

Both he and Kika get him to the lift and then to their apartment and laid him on the bed in their guest bedroom.

"No, mate. I have to go to y/n. I have to apologize. And I have to find her ring before someone else does it." Charles argue but he gave up quickly when Pierre hold his shoulders down with Kika and that was enough for Charles to not be able to stand up.

"You will do that tomorrow, mate. It will be better if you catch some sleep now." Pierre said but Charles already had his eyes closed. He looked at Kika with understanding eyes and she returned the look. They both quietly exited the room to get to sleep themselves.

---

First thing Charles felt the next morning was his head. The pain was terrible, but as he looked around and noticed he isn't in his bedroom with his sweet girlfriend, he remembered the events of last night, and suddenly the headache wasn't so bad.

He want to the kitchen, where Pierre was already standing looking for something in the fridge. He turned around when he heard footsteps.

"Charles." He looked at his best friend. He didn't look any better than last night. His eyes were red and puffy his shirt was stained, probably with alcohol. "You should take a shower."

"Did you hear from y/n?" He asked straight away. He might be hella drunk, but he wasn't the type to forget the whole night because of it.

"Go take a shower first. We will eat breakfast and I will drive you home." Pierre told his best friend. He actually did hear from y/n last night, way later than both of them left the club she texted him, asking if he knew if Charles was okay. The next thing she asked after she was told that Charles was with her was not to tell him that she asked. And Pierre was actually on her side in this.

Charles had enough of arguments, so he did as his best friend said and closed himself behind the door. He noticed a clean set of clothes on the counter and he knew it was meant for him to borrow.

After his quick shower, he put on Pierre's shirt and pants and left the bathroom to join his best friend and Kika at the table. He sat at the chair that had a plate ready in front and he noticed the small piece of metal right next to it.

His eyes instantly became teary as he grabbed it with his right hand. "But- how?" that was all he managed to get out of his mouth as he lifted his gaze from the ring to his best friend's face.

"Yesterday after we left I told some guys about the ring. We left and they were looking for it. Carlos bring it earlier this morning. He said it took them over an hour to find it but at least it is here." Pierre explained.

He couldn't even explain in words how grateful he was for his friends, he made a mental note to thank his teammate and friend for it.

"I- I don't know what to say. Thank you, Pierre. Thank you, guys." He looked at Kika, too. "It would be even worst without you"

"I accept thanks in the form of wedding invitations." Pierre commented which got him a kick under the table from Kika. Was it too soon for that kind of joke? "Sorry, but you really have to apologize to her, mate. What you did yesterday was shitty."

"Okay, less talking, more eating. The faster you eat, the faster you will get to explain yourself." Kika reminded both of them. That left them without any comment as they both looked at each other, Pierre with a little smirk while Charles - still not in the mood for jokes.

"I think I will take a taxi" Charles said after they ate. Pierre just nodded his head, as much as he wanted to hear his best friend and his other half makeup, he knew that it should be done just between them.

Charles grabbed the ring, put it in his pocket, and left the apartment when he read the text that the taxi was already there. He felt like the drive took hours, when in fact it was only ten minutes. But it was enough time to overthink what was waiting for him at home. He even considered that all of his things were already packed and waiting for him at the door.

He, finally, got out of the car and made his way towards the lift to get to their apartment. He didn't even have his keys so he really hoped she would open the door for him.

It took him one knock at the piece of wood and only a few seconds for her to open it. As if she was already waiting for him.

"Charles." She said quietly, trying to control her voice so bad so it won't break, like she had any chance fighting the tears in her eyes.

"Y/n," He said, not doing any better. He considered so many options what would happen when he get there, yet he had no idea what to say now, that she actually opened the door. "Can I come in?" He asked her, realizing they still standing in the hall.

"It's your house as well" She answered and moved a little aside.

They both walked to the living room and Charles looked around. Their pictures together were still all around. Not a single one was moved. As if nothing had happened, as if he didn't throw away her propose ring right in front of her before she even get it.

"Y/n I- I don't know what I was thinking. I want to say sorry to you, but that's not enough for what I did. Never ever did I want you to leave me alone, I was frustrated by the race and the team but I had no rights to take it out on you. I'm sorry for blaming you for not being there when actually I'm the one that can't communicate. I know I can count on you and you can count on me, I will spend my whole lifetime proofing that to you if it is what it takes for you to forgive me." They both had tears streaming down their faces but that didn't matter now as Charles grabbed both Y/n's hands and squeezed them to tell her that what he was saying was meant from deep of his heart. "I'm not sure if you can do that but if you are, please take all the time that you need. I just really need you to know that I would go with you anywhere, just tell me where and I promise you I will be right by your side."

"Charles, I can't tell you that I'm alright- that we're alright because I am hurt" She said which had him in another wave of tears "But I will not throw away all those years together. But I really need time."

"Cherie, please take as much time as you need, just never leave me, please." Charles begged her but she didn't trust her voice enough this time, so all she did was pull him close for a hug.

So Charles was willing to give her time. As much as she needed. Even when the ring in his pocket were more and more heavy.

---

One year later, Monaco Grand-Prix.

"And finally, after many years Charles Leclerc finish his home grand-prix first! Ladies and gentlemen, Charles Leclerc is the winner of this year's Monaco grand-prix!" The commentator's voice could be heard anywhere.

Y/n hugged Arthur, her boyfriend's brother who was standing right beside her in euphoria. Everyone around them was screaming, throwing their hands in the air and clapping for her boyfriend. He got out of the car and run to her first like he always did. She hugged him so tight and he returned it.

"I'm so, so proud of you! You are the winner!" She screamed and his smile grew even bigger now if it was even possible. She kissed his helmet, in the place where his lips should be right before the couple was torn apart when Charles was pulled for other hugs and then interviews.

He returned to y/n as soon as he could and before he hoped to take a shower he told her "I'm glad you're here with me, I wouldn't have done it without you."

"You are an amazing driver, you are driving this car, not me." She answered. It's safe to say that their relationship had never been this good before.

"Take a shower with me?" He asked with a little smirk as he wrapped his arms around her waist, hers went around his torso in a matter of seconds.

And how she could say no when he was standing in front of her with his little smirk, fireproofs and his race suit hanging low on his hips?

She kissed his lips and they made their way to the shower and what happened there, was a whole different story.

---

Everything will be ready at 8 p.m.

You better not chicken out this time.

Charles read two messages from his best friend answering quickly.

I didn't chicken out, I just wanted it to be more special and keep it a surprise.

"Pierre asks if we want to go to the afterparty" Charles asked as he was sitting at the kitchen table, watching y/n making some food for both of them.

"We can, only if you want" She answered him, quickly returning to cutting vegetables.

"He said that this will be smaller, on a yacht so we can celebrate P1 with closest ones, not whole club" Charles explained, hoping he didn't sound susceptions.

"Yeah okay, dinner will be ready in 10, then we can start getting ready, okay?" She asked.

"Yeah. I love you." Charles said casually, with his heart-shaped eyes which sent off millions of butterflies in y/n stomach. She answered him with the same.

---

All dressed up Y/n and Charles finally get on the yacht, that seemed to be totally empty, no party in sign.

"Are we first? That unusual." Y/n commented as it usually them both to make an appearance when everybody is already drunk.

"Yeah, c'mon" Charles answered all uptight as he took a few steps and hopped on the yacht. He held his hand out for y/n to grab it and step there too.

It was already past 8 p.m. so it was quite surprising that no one was there, but what was even more surprising what that the lights were turned on. Turned her back to Charles to look if somebody was coming from port but when she didn't see anyone, she turned back around.

Only to be met with Charles on one knee.

No fucking way.

"Y/n, you've been there for me for the past five years. And for all those five years, I knew I wanted to marry you one day. I knew it damn well when I almost ruined our relationship a year ago. You took me back and I promised you to give you time. And I'm still willing to give it to you. I want to give you all the time I have. I want to give and share with you every second of my life for the rest of it. I want to be anywhere you are. I want to be able to count on you and make sure you can count on me. Y/n, my cherie, my best friend, my partner in crime, will you marry me?" He may or may not have tears in his eyes, his hands may or may not be shaking as he anxiously waited for an answer.

"Charles- I- of course, I will marry you!" She answered, fighting with the tears in her eyes. She went for a hug as well, noticing how beautiful the ring he was now putting on her finger. "It's perfect" She said, kissing his lips.

"Sweetheart, you have no idea how glad I'm you like it." Charles answered her after their kiss. It wasn't really needed because all he had to say was already in this kiss.

"Time to drink for our soon-to-be bride and groom!!!" Pierre yelled getting out of his hidden spot in the cabin. After he went Arthur, their mum, and actually too many people looking at how small this cabin was. Charles and y/n were too busy to think how all of them squeezed in here but surely five more minutes and they all would pass out due to lack of oxygen.

"Congratulations sweethearts! I knew since Charles introduced you to us that one day you were going to be Leclerc." Pascale said, as she was the first one to come to them when the music started playing.

"Congrats, mate!" Pierre hugged Charles while Kika by is side hugged y/n.

"I hope I will be your bridesmaid! I promise I will organize you the best bachelorette party ever!" Kika said to y/n which had her giggling. She just got proposed to and now she already had to think about bridesmaids!

"Hey, if she's bridesmaid I have to be best man!" Pierre answered.

"Ey, ey, not that fast amigo!" Carlos appeared out of nowhere behind Pierre, putting his hand on French driver shoulder "He said I will be best man after I found the ring last year! You didn't forget right?" Carlos asked.

"What?! You told him he can be best man? C'mon..." Two drivers started arguing over who was going to be best man at the weeding while Charles attention catch y/n voice.

"Wait, so this is actually the ring, like the one from your dad? I thought it was lost" His now fiancée asked.

"Yeah, it is. But wait, how do you know that my dad got it with me? I wanted to tell you that later tonight" Charles asked shocked, maybe he wasn't good at keeping secrets, especially not from her, but he would remember if he slipped this.

"Uhh.. that actually might be my fault." If it wasn't enough people appearing out of nowhere that night, Arthur was now standing right next to Charles with guilt in his eyes.

"What?" He asked his brother what did he mean it's his fault.

"Five years ago. You were helping mom in the kitchen after you introduced y/n to us. She was talking with Lorenzo so I decided to help too but I overheard you talking about the ring so I came back" He explained.

"Okay, but that still..." Charles tried to say that did not told him anything, but Arthur started talking again.

"Your secret was safe with me, I swear. For a whole ass year, I kept my mouth shut but then there was that party. I drunk a bit and she just-"

"Hey, don't put it on me!" Y/n laughed, as much as she liked Arthur alive, she wanted to hear really story.

"Okay, I came up to her and told her that I can't wait for her to be Leclerc and for you to give her the ring you choose with dad. I told her it was meaningful and everything. I'm sorry" Arthur got to the end of the story and looked up at his brother.

"So you telling me, I kept my mouth shut, bite my tongue like hundred times but all this time you knew about it? Unbelievable!" Charles said with a look of betrayal on his face. "And you, you little shit? You couldn't tell me sooner? Like every time I was panicking that I almost spilled the surprise?!" He asked his brother this time.

"I said I'm sorry!" Arthur argue back.

"Kids, please calm down. It's time to celebrate. My son is a double winner tonight!" Pascale said. And Charles couldn't agree more. Even though for a second he had forgotten that he actually won the race today, because now he had much more important win.

"You are right, Mrs. Leclerc! It's time to drink for them!" Max yelled, with a beer in his hand.

It definitely wasn't his first tonight.

a/n. It took me a second to write and it was also longer than I expected but I still hope you enjoy it! Especially the person who requested it because it was fun to write! I changed a few things but defo strong inspo from this grey's anatomy ep. Love you:))

[sednas]

['CAUSE HE'S A F×CK BOY ─ s. gojo]

꒰ ͜͡➸ sorry what did you say? oh you want a virginkiller!gojo fic? with enemies to lovers vibes? yeah I might have this one in store for you. smut will be in the second part tho! (which will be posted in one week or five months, who knows! :))

pairing: virginkiller!gojo x virgin!fem!reader

tw: college!au, suggestive themes, virginity kink, (dub-con) make out session, gojo is annoying but hey what's new, sexual tension, light fem masturbation at the end

gojo satoru was the golden boy. the most intelligent student of his class, the most talented sports player of the school, the most popular guy of the campus, maybe even of the whole city. he was excellent at everything. people were too amazed by his talent to notice his arrogance and his condescending smile, too blinded by his bright blue eyes and his snowy white hair.

gojo was the best at everything, and it included fucking. hell, fucking was actually on top of the list. he had a cheerleader waiting for him every night in his room, sometimes he could just wink at a girl and she was already spreading her legs for him in the bathroom a few minutes later. he could have literally everyone, but what he liked best was virgins. he loved them, such good girls who managed to keep their innocence until college. they were always so easy, so pliant.

and the thing he mostly liked to do with them was fucking them so hard that nobody could ever compare after that. he wanted them to think about him every time they would fuck someone else, he wanted them to rub their thighs together while thinking about him years later, this is what he liked to do with them. of course, the thought of ruining them for their first time was also appealing, they were usually so shy and reserved, he liked to take them apart piece by piece, make them drool, and then cry, and then forcing them to look at themselves in the mirror, letting them see how the filthiest version of themselves looked like. and in the end, when they were too fucked to think, he made them say thanks.

and this was exactly what he wanted to do with you.

you were way more difficult than the others, doing your best to ignore his piercing blue eyes, answering by a simple nod of your head every time he was trying to start a conversation, leaving the room every time he was in.

yeah you were difficult, but satoru always got what he wanted.

“all by yourself uh?”

he startled you a bit, and he could see that you were already looking for a way out by the way your eyes were looking at everything but him.

he moved his body to be at the same height as you, looking at you through his glasses, and then he said your name in a sweet voice, smiling when he saw how easily he got you looking back at him, your face obviously flushed.

“finally paying attention to me mh? it's a shame that you don't look at me often, I really like your eyes, they're pretty.”

and he really meant it, you were telling him everything with those eyes, the way you were constantly daydreaming about him, how you were humping your pillow at night, imagining it was his thigh instead. yeah, very pretty eyes.

“I want to get to know ya.” he said with a smile, and he got closer.

he kept himself from laughing when he saw you taking a few steps back and then he stopped, not wanting to make you panic too much.

“here, gimme your phone.”

you obeyed after barely a few seconds, and it only confirmed what he was already thinking; you were wrapped around his finger even though you were trying to hide it.

“mmh cute wallpaper… alright I'm just gonna add my number to your contacts annnnnd… done!” he finally said, his relaxed smile still on his face, handing you over your phone.

he didn't let go of it immediately, making sure your hands brushed against one another, noticing the way your breath got stuck in your throat.

“call me okay?”

one month passed by and you never called, or even texted. gojo felt frustration for the first time in his life, and because of that he was rougher than usual when he was fucking a cheerleader, his thoughts always coming back to you, and the way you were still ignoring him even though you were fucking yourself with your fingers every night while thinking about him. he was starting to get tired of his own game, but still, he wasn't planning on giving up. and so when he saw you standing in the kitchen during that halloween party, a devilish grin appeared on his pale face...

it's already too late when you spot him across the room, his blue eyes are on you. you can barely think of an escape that he's already in front of you, wearing a black tuxedo, a white collar wrapped around his neck and long white victorian sleeves hugging his arms, and making the rings on his fingers look elegant.

“you didn't call me.“ gojo whispers against your ear, his long arms trapping you between his body and the kitchen counter.

you open your mouth but no sound comes out, your eyes try to escape his teasing gaze as you're sure he can see every little detail on your face by standing so close.

“I thought… I thought you weren't serious when you gave me your number.”

he chuckles, noticing how you're even more embarrassed to look him in the eyes when he hasn't his glasses on.

“I like your costume, it suits your body.”

you feel your skin grows hot, his voice so soft and intimate, his eyes trailing on your body from up and down. it feels like you're alone in the whole house with only him. and your heart is racing with fear and anticipation, as you bring your thighs together. gojo notices it, placing his knee between them before you can fully close them, making you gasp.

“so tell me something baby…” he starts speaking in a honeyed voice, his lips coming closer to your ear.

you blink at the nickname, his body weighting a little more on your own, your back uncomfortably pressed against the kitchen counter as your body slowly bent to accommodate to the awkward position.

“are you scared of me or something?”

a nervous laugh comes out of your mouth, turning your head to escape from his warm gaze.

“I'm not scared of you.”

he can tell you're sincere, but it only makes him want to know more.

“then why are you avoiding me all the time uh?”

he tilts his head to the side, eyes burning with curiosity and his teeth flashing at you when you finally look back at him.

“i'm avoiding you because… you're so annoying, and you fuck everyone you know and you're so arrogant, always thinking you're better than anyone else. I don't like you, at all.”

a few seconds of silence pass by while both of you just look at eachother, until a smirk slowly appears on gojo's face.

“I didn't know you were so mean.” he laughed. “but if you hate me so much why aren't you pushing me away right now?” his sultry voice keeps sliding on you like honey, his mouth so close to your skin, breath fanning over your neck.

he's right, and he knows it, smiling even wider when he sees you looking at the ground in defeat.

“that's what I thought.” he smiles, one of his hand sliding along the side of your jaw, the sudden touch making your heart skips a beat.

his pale hand looks good on your skin, you can feel his fingers squeezing lightly your throat and the atmosphere becomes more tense than before, he still has this grin, like he knows everything about you, especially how much you want him to touch you more.

you're a few seconds away from giving up, your body almost falling on the counter to let gojo fully rest on you. somehow his smirk grows wider when he sees you closing your eyes. you let out a little whine when you feel him pressing all of his body weight against you.

“that was a sweet sound baby, mind if you make some more for me?”

despite shaking your head no, you pressed your body against him, hungry for more, finding a new pleasure in being the center of his attention. his slender fingers find their way to squeeze your chest, drawing another whine out of your mouth.

“more…” he orders, the sound of his voice muffled against your skin.

you try to close your lips, in a poor attempt not to give in so easily, but your legs turn to jelly as soon as he puts his soft lips on your neck. one of your hands flew through his white hair as you gasped at this new sensation.

his hot tongue tracing kisses along your neck, he grabbed your hips, bringing you even closer, letting you feel his boner. you feel dirty, intoxicated, but the heat coming out of his body is addictive. you let out another sound and your fingers are now grabbing his shirt in a needy way, trying to get him even closer to you. you want more. you need more.

you suddenly open your eyes when you feel his warmth vanish from your trembling body. you watch him walk away in disbelief while he's wearing a wicked smile on his face.

“I think my friends are waiting for me… it was fun, you should call me later okay?” he winked at you before exiting the room without letting you have any time to react.

you're left here, breathless, blood pumping into your veins, eyes clouded with desire, a pool of arousal between your legs. your hands clench into fists, of course he did it on purpose.

your eyes are fixated on your phone as breathless sighs keep coming out of your mouth.

"fuck!" you let out an exasperated groan, throwing your head back into the soft pillows.

your fingers are still trying to reach that spongy spot inside you, you arch your back, lifting your hips in the air, hoping it will allow your fingers to touch deeper parts. but you're left unsatisfied again, your legs twitching in frustration. your head hit your pillow and your eyes go back to your phone.

"he would fuck me right." you mumble to yourself.

part two

jjk masterlist

a lovely reminder that reblogs and comments are highly appreciated ♡

[eusouumfuckingkoala]

If the World Was Ending (Alessia Russo x Reader)

a/n: This one is short, honestly I don't know how I feel about this one, tell me what you think about it.

I was bored all day and night with nothing to do but miss Alessia, everything I did reminded me of her, this distance was so hard not having her every day was hitting me harder than I thought, I knew dating a professional football player would require a lot to keep it up with a schedule we had never been so much time apart but I couldn't leave my job to go with her to the World Cup.

So the only thing I could think of after a few drinks at home was to text her - what's the worst that could happen?

To Lessi 🧸

I didn't feel it when the earthquake happened?

From Lessi 🧸

I just landed I didn't feel anything, it's everything okay?

To Lessi 🧸

Got me thinking...

From Lessi 🧸

About what?

To Lessi 🧸

Were you out drinking, were you in the living room chillin' watchin' television...

From Lessi 🧸

Y/N/N you aren't making any sense, I just told you I landed. Did you hit your head with the earthquake?

To Lessi 🧸

It's been a year now, think I figured out, how to let you go...

From Lessi 🧸

Don't be dramatic it was just 4 months?

To Lessi 🧸

We know you weren't down for forever and it's fine...

From Lessi 🧸

We already talk about this Y/N/N...And we are having this conversation by text.

To Lessi 🧸

I know you know we know...

From Lessi 🧸

You aren't making any sense! Are you drunk?

To Lessi 🧸

We weren't meant for each other and it's fine...

From Lessi 🧸

I'm on my way over!

To Lessi 🧸

But If the world was ending you'd come over right?"

Since she didn't answer, I ended up going to take a shower. Afterward, I went to the backyard and put the music on to relax - it was the only thing that could calm you down besides Alessia. It was the only two ways I could connect with my feelings without feeling overwhelmed by it.

The night air carried a gentle breeze, carrying the subtle scent of blooming flowers and fresh dew. String lights adorned the backyard, casting a warm glow that played with the shadows. As Alessia entered the house with the spare key, the sliding door opened, revealing you against the backdrop of twinkling lights and the soft melody of your favorite song filling the air.

"Y/N where are you?"

You appeared at the sliding door to the living room, music playing in the background as you looked at her.

"Hallo..."

Alessia approached, a mix of relief and worry evident in her eyes. She stopped in front of you and reached to hold your hands. "What happened? I just landed, and you're acting like we broke up. You scare me..."

"It's been 4 months, but I miss you so much, you don't know how much..." She was already with tears in her eyes. "And I already told you I was never down for forever, but I thought I was looking for something impossible to find. This feeling you give me that never disappears even when the world is all messed up, it's like electricity, with you, it's just different! I love you, Y/N!"

You look at her with so much adoration that it leaves her even more confused. Your hand cradled her face, gently wiping her tears with your thumbs.

"Please say something..."

You could see the panic in her eyes, which made you feel guilty, but all that she just told made your heart speak a bit. She had never expressed how you made her feel, and you realized how much she actually loved you.

"I love you too, Lessi, but listen..."

She was confused but stopped to listen to the song that was playing in the background. Suddenly, she playfully pushed you away, making you stumble.

"Are you for real, Y/N! You text prank me why? I thought you were breaking up with me!"

"Never in a million years!" You pulled her into a kiss that conveyed all your feelings, leaving her momentarily baffled. After she composed herself, she snuggled into your arms. "I miss you so much, Lessi."

"Don't even try there are no kisses for you until tomorrow!" She declared annoyed, making you playfully whine.

"What? Why?"

"You are lucky I'm not making you sleep on the couch!"

"You wouldn't, you miss me too much. Denying yourself another good night of sleep would make no sense, Princess."

"Whatever? I'm gonna take a shower." She tried to hide her smile, knowing full well that you were right.

Before she could go, you couldn't resist but pull her into an embrace, when your eyes locked onto hers, a soft smile played on your lips, meeting her in a lingering and affectionate kiss.

"I mean it, Lessi. I missed you so much." She looks at you trying to act unimpressed.

"Well, maybe there's a chance for one more kiss." She smirks playfully once you lean in to kiss her again.

She chuckled, teasingly pulling away, and headed to the shower, leaving you with a contented smile. The atmosphere shifted from emotional intensity to a more playful banter, a dance between lovers who found solace in both serious and lighthearted moments. The night held a promise of tomorrow, filled with shared laughter, kisses, and the comfort of being in each other's arms once again. Making a home feel like home again.

[yuyu1024]

I missed you

Pairings: Yoongi (Suga) × y/n

Genre/tags: idol secret dating

Warning: language, making out, semi public sex, pet names, fluff [lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 1.40k

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

Note: repost. Check pinned post for more ♥️

*******

He have been touring for a while. You wished you can accompany him and see the world with him but that's impossible. You have your own work and you can't risk people seeing you in every tour stop. It's for your own protection and also for his career. You don't want to ruin his career.

It maybe romantic to scream yo the whole wide world that he is your man and you both love each other so much. It's not always the best option.

But since it's been months since the last you saw him, you planned on going to one of his stop. You saved enough money and Vaction leave credits so you can stay for a week for him. Since he will be staying as well for work too.

----

Admiring the view from your balcony, you can't help but smile like a little kid while taking pictures of the sky, the buildings and everything you're seeing.



(Photo not mine. Ctto)

You got tense a little as hands snakes around your torso. "Having fun?" But the second you heard his voice, your body relaxes. You lean back, head on his shoulder and giving him access to kiss you on your neck. "I'm sorry, I'm a little late... we got caught in traffic on our way back."

"It's fine. I understand." Moving away from his embrace, you face him and admire how dashing he looks. "Your hair got longer..." you then tug his hair behind his ear.

"Well, you said you wanted to see me with longer hair so... I grew it out."

"Did I?"

"Yes, mentioned it before..."

"You really do pay attention to everything I say..." you giggle on how cute your boyfriend is. This makes you feel happy.

"It's because I love you..." he moves closer to you, making you walk back a little. Your lowerback now is leaning on the fence of the balcony. His face is just inches away from yours, "I missed you so much..." he say staring at your parted lips. "Wait.. You're wearing make up?"

You look away, a little embarassed. You're not the type to actually put make up all the time. Yoongi is used to seeing you barefaced since you two always meet in hiding. Either your apartment or his.

"Well, it's been so long since I've seen you... and... maybe... you've seen quite a few beautiful ladies around the world so..."

He snorts a laugh. He tries not to laugh but you can see how his shoulder is shaking trying to supress it.

"Yah!" You slap him by his shoulder, "what's so funny? Am I a joke to you now?"

"Oh, babe." He wraps you up in embrace, his hands, one at the back of your head and one at the back of your neck. His thumb lightly caressing you. "You know how much I love you... I don't care about other women. My eyes, heart, body and soul is just for you... my Y/n..."

You lock your arms around his torso. "I love you too... so much..." you nuzzles your face on his chest. "I missed you so bad... this have been the longest we were apart."

"I know..." he kisses the top of your head and then reaches for your chin to lift it up. "I've missed you to... and.." he pauses to kiss you. He does it with a very longing feeling. He is not rushing every move but he's very much leading the whole kiss. You can feel how he savours each lips to lips friction.

"Yoongi," you say as you lips parted from his, "I think we should get inside... we are exposed here..."

"Why? Don't you love to make out here? With this view?" His body is closer to yours. So close that both of your clothes are the only thing separating you both.

"I do..." You push your hair away from your face, "but don't you think... people might see us...?"

He leans down and begins kissing you on your neck then your exposed shoulder. You didn't realized he had already slipped the strap of your dress down.

"Yoongi..." you moan but you still try to stop him. "Babe..."

"We're on the 28th floor. We are facing the ocean... the other buildings are far away. They will not notice us..." he says quietly

He grabs both your hands by the wrist, throwing them around his neck for you to hold onto. He then takes one of your leg up around his hips. Pushes the skirt of your dress away, exposing your legs and giving him an easy access to your panties.

"Please...babe... allow me..." he runs his thumb over your already wet core. "I want to have you now... promise... I will be careful... if you're worried anyone would see us... I just..." your foreheard together, his eyes closed shut as he rub his thumb on you.

You didn't answer him yet. You want answer but your so indulged in the moment.

"Ah! Yes..." You hold on tight around his neck. You feel a sudden weakness on your body as he continues to rub your clit. "More... Yoongi... more..."

"Did you miss this?" He whispers to your ears. You nod. "How about this?" He pushes your panties to the side and slides one finger in.

"Fuck! Ah! Y-yes..." you cry. Your grip onto his shoulder like its life or death. "Please... so good!"

Yoongi slowly pushes another digit in you making you quiver with pleasure. "I love how you sound..." the rythm of his pushing in and out of you is making you go crazy.

"Please... I want you..." you says looking into his eyes. "I want... you..."

He picks you up like a bride. "Let's go inside. It's getting cold."

"I thought... you want to try do have sex here... for a change..."

"We can if you want to.. but I realized I don't want you to get sick. You get cold so easily..."

"Oh, okay."

"Plus, I don't think they are ready to hear us do this all night... maybe some other time. For now... all of your orgasm is mine to hear and enjoy."😈

[darkbluekies]

Do we actually know what happens in the basement? Or did I miss it somewhere?It sounds terrfying but I can’t seem to find or remeber what happens in it

I haven't exactly written what goes on in the basement, but from a few oneshots etc, you can piece together that there are probably a lot of isolation, starvation, mental manipulation and physical things. I want/plan to make a one-shot where yn is in the basement after doing something they shouldn't:)

Examples/times the basement is mentioned to get a better understanding of just how bad it can be (with links in case you want to read the stories<3):

Best for you:

You messed up badly. You should not have tried to escape. Look where you ended up — in the darkest corner of his basement with your ankles chained to the stone floor. Reduced to nothing more than a dog.

You're not sure how long you've been down here, but you've been given the opportunity to use the degrading potty four times by now by rough, evil men. Or was it more?

You press yourself closer to the wall, wishing nothing else than to melt into it and disappear. 

"No, no, no, shh, it's okay", he says quickly. "I'm not going to hurt you anymore. Everything is over. I'm here to help."

You doubt that.

His hand comes up to massage your roots. All of these actions are so soft and after being chained up in this cold, hard and unforgiving basement, you can't do anything else but slowly relax.

The witty and uncanny part 1

Resting now might be crucial in case Silas decides to find you again. Otherwise you might be too vulnerable for Silas's harsh manipulation. You won’t survive the basement if you’re not rested up.

Intruder part 2

The chains around your wrists, ankles and throat kep you in place. Like a filthy dog. You start to feel less and less human and more like an animal for every day that passes by. You remind yourself of your name, your background and your family to avoid going insane. But maybe that's what he wants? He wants you dumb and dusted for him so you won't try to escape. Maybe he wants you to be a blank canvas that only he can paint in whatever color and shapes he wants. Maybe he wants to mold your brain into his perfect servant. Someone that does everything he wants at the blink of an eye.

Can't hide from me

Every motion is quiet and terrified. You’re horrified you’ll turn around and see him stand right behind you with his death glare, ready to throw you back into the basement. You’d rather die than end up there again. You don’t think you can take another day, week or month in the basement. To be fair, you never know how long you’re down there. One time you entered when the snow was falling outside and came out when the first flowers bloomed.

“Listen, baby, you have two choices. Either, you come with me like a good little pet and don’t cause trouble. That way, your punishment will be much lighter. Or, you can continue to act like a brat and I’ll knock you unconscious and throw you into the basement until you grow mold. What do you say? Are you going to behave?”

[writingquestionsanswered]

"Probably one of my biggest writing-related takeaways of 2023 was the brain science behind being overwhelmed by writing. So often, we put so much pressure on ourselves to meet goals, and get so frustrated with ourselves when we fail, that we end up making writing time something that fills us with anxiety. So our brains perceive that activity as a threat, which makes us want to avoid it."

I'd love to learn more about this cause it's my biggest problem when it comes to writing. The avoidance of the task, but it also manifests also as feeling overwhelmed by writing a long story/novel.

Some Brain Science Behind Avoidance

I encountered this idea of fear-based avoidance in a few workshops and summits over the past year, but I have to give a shout out to author/coach Monica Hay whose "Overcome Writer's Resistance Bootcamp" explained it the best. I can't find my notes so I'm going from memory here, but the gist of it was that our brains are hard-wired to avoid things that make us feel fearful or uneasy. This is an evolutionary throwback to when those instinctual feelings helped us steer clear from danger. As I remember Monica putting it, "Don't go that way, there are cheetahs there that will eat us."

So... how does this apply to avoidance of writing?

When we heap unreasonable goals and deadlines on ourselves, and berate ourselves for falling short of them, we inadvertently turn writing into a stressful activity. So, when we sit down to write, our brain picks up on that stress and says, "Don't go that way, cheetahs will eat us," and your gut instinct tells you to avoid this stressful activity at all cost. And then it becomes kind of a vicious cycle because you feel even worse because you're avoiding writing, and that makes you feel more overwhelmed and makes writing more stressful, and well... you can see the problem.

The solution? De-stress the writing process for yourself as much as you can. Start by de-stressing yourself when you sit down to write... take a relaxing walk first, do some yoga or a meditation exercise, or try some grounding techniques. See if you can do some things to make your writing environment more relaxing and inviting. Put on some soft lighting and relaxing music, use your favorite method to lightly scent the air, grab your favorite drink and snack. Then, just try to move the needle forward in any way you can.

My suggestions: try editing a sentence. Maybe see if you can add a paragraph or two. Don't think about deadlines or word count or what others are doing. Just focus on adding something to the page, even if it's changing a word or adding a sentence. Don't push yourself. Congratulate yourself on whatever progress you made. Ultimately, if you do this every day, the stress should start to melt away and writing becomes an activity that your brain no longer tells you to avoid.

Another suggestion: try to avoid setting arbitrary deadlines, or if you have to set a deadline, take a look at your schedule/calendar and be really honest about how much time you actually have to write. Because so often what happens is we say, "I want to finish this 80k word draft in eight weeks..." but the reality is we're not going to write all 56 of those days. In fact, when we take an honest look...

-3 days per week for days with both class and work = 32 days -5 days for a cruise next month = 27 days -1 day for bestie's birthday celebration = 26 days -Sundays because that's hiking day = 18 days Suddenly, that eight weeks is actually only 18 days... and that's not even taking account things that come up unexpectedly. But, let's say you do get to write all 18 days, and let's say you know you can commit three hours a day to writing but you'll probably take two ten-minute brakes... so 48 hours worth of writing. But here's the problem: you know on a good hour, you're probably only going to write 1200 words. And guess what: 1200 words per hour over 48 hours is only 57,600 words... far short of your 80k goal... and that's assuming you get to write all 18 days and hit 1200 words every hour you write. In other words... you've set yourself an impossible deadline, and when you fall short of it without understanding why, you're going to be disappointed in yourself. And that's why it's so, so important to be honest about the time you have and how much you can reasonably accomplish within that time. Also: just don't be hard on yourself. It will never make you write faster, more, or better.

I hope you can use this to overcome your own resistance to writing! ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[flowerflowerflo]

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚girly girl's guide to journalling 🩰 ๋࣭ ⭑

˚₊‧꒰ა benefits of journalling ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

• helps to regulate emotions

• understand yourself better

• a fun pass time! ♡

• analyse you, your habits, thoughts, etc

• de-stresses, relieves & relaxes

• productive & away from social media

• gives you control over something

• a way for you to get everything out, big or small, good or bad ♡

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ chapter 1: beginnings

ok! so journalling is mentioned a lot in the girlblogger, wonyoungism, self growth, loa etc etc side of tumblr but when i actually took that advice started it was really really daunting and i procrastinated it for aaaages. so this is here to help you start a fun girly hobby that will help you out on your journey 🩷🎀

♡ the most important thing when beginning ur girl journal is figuring out its purpose. is it to plan, is it to document, is it for healing, is it for personal development, is it for manifestation, is it to glow up, is it for creativity, is it just to have fun? it makes it a lot easier to think of ideas once you have a set purpose in mind, but obviously it can be anything you want, any combination of these, or something other than these. i personally do a combination of emotional healing, personal development, manifestation, glow up, gratitude & just having fun, but its whatever u want bae. <3

♡ okay! first plan of action; get a notebook. obviously. lined or plain, black or white, big or small doesn't matter. anything you feel most comfortable and most drawn to. ♡

♡ second, establish a range of pens, pencils, colours, etc. you're going to be using so you can keep consistent (if thats your thing) and make it all pretty! you can tailor this to you in any way; said range doesn't have to be big, you can literally just use the same biro and 2 colours, pencils, all the colours, one colour, or none if you want; its all yours! ♡

♡ lastly, i'd suggest to gather a bunch of stickers and materials and fun cute things ur gonna add in the pages of your journal, as it makes it pop off the page and look more visually appealing and layed and feel more interesting overall. i use stickers, coloured paper, ribbons, receipts, doodles, print outs, logos, labels, gems, sticky notes, and things i find from my daily life too. you don't have to do that much or any at all if you don't want to, but i highly recommend it! just for ur personal enjoyment ♡

one thing i'd suggest is trying not to keep a strict schedule on it, like "i have to journal every day etc" because i did this and it demotivated me sooo much. don't do that! just do it when you feel you want to! it's supposed to be fun, not a chore!

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ chapter 2: setup

♡ okay so! once you've got all the basics set up, i feel it should be pretty self explanatory from here onwards, but since this is a guide i'm not gonna leave u by yourself. this is optional, but if you're planning on making journalling a hobby or a regular habit, i'd say the first thing you wanna do is enhance & expand. find some plastic folders to attach or create paper pockets or little sections where you can put resources to stick in in ur journal so you have more space, customise, and so on. i feel this is very overlooked but its sooo fun and its really creative and and makes it so unique to you <3

♡ one thing i'd suggest too if you're doing this especially or just for any type of journal really is looking on pinterest for inspo!! this is for everything really. covers, layouts, page inspo, page ideas, customisation, journal prompts, shadow work, titles, doodles etc. i keep a board of these on my pinterest & it really helps <3

♡ one of the first things i did when i set up my journal a few months ago was do one page just an index of pages to make so i had a basic structure to go off of. this went from basic journal pages you see everywhere like about me pages n all that to the most obscure shit you could possibly imagine. this is helpful because it gives you a frame to work off of when you're at a loss for what to do in ur journal. i already have a post on this so i really recommend that if ur looking for ideas cus there's LOADS <3

another thing on pinterest; don't force urself to stick to a specific theme you've found or try and avoid doing or writing certain things in ur journal cus you wanna stick to a specific aesthetic! again, it's supposed to be fun, not a chore, and it's supposed to be completely unique to you, like a physical version of your inner world. its perfectly fine to take inspo, just remember its yours. you are your own person & you don't have to show it to anyone, it doesn't have to make sense to them, just have fun 🩷

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ chapter 3: resources

links ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

@prissygrlsorority's beauty binder

journalling index by yours truly <3

shadow work prompts for literally everything

@prettygirlmjmjmj's personal journalling prompts

@honeytonedhottie's diary guide

inspo ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

lots of love! <3

[mswritingthings]

Big Prompt List

Instead of randomly putting out a few little lists here and there, I'll try to do a big one every 6 months or so. Yes, I did reuse a lot of my older prompts on this one, but the next one will be newer ones.

"It's always nights like this that I feel the loneliest."

"I can't be 'just friends' anymore!"

"This sort of thing was never meant to happen."

"Why don't you love me?"

"I have tried so hard for so long, and I'm just exhausted."

"There has got to be more to marriage than what we have."

"Please, just come back to me. I miss you."

"Don't cry, I hate it when you cry."

"I can't believe you'd do this to me."

"You were supposed to love and cherish me."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Just come back, we can fix this."

"I feel lost without you."

"This isn't about you anymore. It's my turn."

"What do you want from me?"

"There it is. There's that smile I love so much."

"I've never been happier with anybody else."

"You've shown me what it's like to be loved."

"Let's go do something, just the two of us."

"It's hard not to love you, I know that now."

"Love me or leave me here."

"If you call me baby, I'll always be yours."

"I want to taste her lips cause they taste like you."

"You looked at me like I was someone else."

"You're drunk, go home."

"I never thought I'd fall for you as hard as I did."

"I'll be anything you want. You love me more than you love yourself."

"Relax, there's no reason for you to be so wound up."

"I'd be willing to lose everything to make them happy."

"You're like an angel, my angel."

"We're in love, and I am actually happy for once."

"Please don't ruin this for us."

"We aren't together anymore, but that doesn't mean I stopped loving you."

"Why is it so hard for you to accept that you're loveable?"

"I like the way your eyes crinkle when you smile, it's cute."

"Everything always works out in the end because it's you."

"Wow, you look absolutely breathtaking."

"I don't have to keep changing because they love me for me."

"Come on now, let's have some fun."

"You're going to be the death of me."

"Talk dirty to me."

"You're ridiculous."

"Charming, you know just how to make a girl blush."

"What kind of trouble are you going to get me into?"

"If you're gonna cuff me, you might as well throw the gag in too."

"Oh my god, what is wrong with you?"

"A little flirting never hurt anybody."

"Just get over here and kiss me."

"God, you are so fucking hot sometimes."

"Do you believe in love?"

"I'm going to fight for what I want to be."

"Do you really love me underneath it all?"

"There's not much left of me."

"I want to drag you down with me."

"I love myself, I want you to love me."

"Do you think of me when you're with her?"

"You are a brick tied to me that's dragging me down."

"Don't you remember how you told me you loved me baby?"

"I was supposed to be a doctor before all this started."

"Death wasn't supposed to feel like a mercy."

"The stars look different down here."

"Believe me, I didn't want it to come to this."

"Don't go, it's not safe out there for you."

"Your job isn't to make sure I make it out alive, not anymore."

"I don't want to live forever."

"Where do you go when you feel like there's nowhere to run?"

"And everything you ever said now tears me all apart."

"I've seen the things you put me through and I wish I could die."

"I love it so much it just turns to hate."

"When they get what they want, they never want it again."

"You want it all, but you can't have it."

"After all the lies you told, who will save your soul?"

"Life is perfect, never better."

"Fuck you."

"Isn't it much more fun fucking than fighting?"

I know I said to get laid, but I didn't mean them."

"I hope this lasts forever."

"Don't go, I need you."

"It's ben a long time."

"Sit and drink with me."

"The pain always subsides eventually."

"I got used to this."

"Tell me it'll be okay."

"I can't say sorry anymore."

"Please come back to bed."

"It wasn't worth losing you."

"There's too much at stake for me to let you be so selfish."

"Sometimes I wish that I never met you."

"You're insufferable, but I love you."

"It's a nasty business, that's what they don't tell you about loving someone."

"I have lost everything, but I keep going because I have to."

"There's a whole world of poeple out there who will love you."

"I know I'm now who you wanted to spend the night with, but I am here."

"I give up, being loved isn't worth all this humiliation."

"If you look away from me again, I swear I'll stop."

"You can have me any way you want, just ask nicely."

"You've taken good care of me, now let me take care of you."

"You have got to stop distracting me so much while I'm trying to work."

"Hey, all I'm looking for tonight is a good time."

"There's not a lot a good kiss can't solve."

[mchlgayser]

𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 ft south terano

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: He is annoying. He follows you around and keep asking you out. You hate him, he is violent and harsh but despite it all, you try out a challenge.

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff / ✮

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: minor languages

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: I've seen somebody blogging about how they want this kind of topic with South so I just had to do it, now that I'm in a good mood (kind of). Happy reading xoxo

Annoying grunts escape his lip upon hearing your same usual reply 'Tell me why do you keep saying no to me?' He persists and you roll your eyes at him 'Do I need to tell you the reason? I just don't like you.' You close your bag and leave him on the spot.

That guy's name is South. A random guy you met months back during your work hour - Actually, you met him the day before beating the heck out of someone. Ever since then he's been bothering you and keeps asking you out, on a date. But for one obvious reason, you declined every time.

You hate violence, in any form doesn't matter but you hate it, with all your guts and South is just violent and vicious.

You speed-walk to the bus stop upon hearing him irritatingly calls out for you. You screech on your steps hearing him holler at you.

'Stop following me.' You demand, and he chortles 'Why not? I want to date you.' You shake your head at the remark and run inside the bus once it stops.

You sigh in relief that he didn't manage to get inside, you see him yell for you to get back making you slightly laugh.

Somehow, you find him funny

The next day is just how you want it to be, no South and his annoyingly loud bike. You're serving food and beverages for the customers just perfectly but when your shift is about to end, the door chimes and he came. Of course, he cannot easily disappear.

'What do you want?' You deadpanned, one hand over your midsection, and giving him a knowing look 'Relax, gorgeous. I'm here as a customer.' He looks up from you to the menu board 'I'll have your most requested drink.' You type in his orders and give him the receipt along with the changes 'We'll serve you in a minute.' You give him one forceful smile as you watch him leave to his seat.

'South Terano!' You calls out and be glad that there are no customers occupied inside or that you'll scare them away by saying the infamous Rokuhara Tandai leader's name.

He takes the drink and gives it to you back 'And I give you that as your admirer.' He winks before he left the shop, whistling a tune.

You stare at the drink feeling flustered to your neck, you gasp putting the drink down and slapping yourself on the face multiple times 'Get yourself together, you idiot.' Once your shift ended, you left your workplace along with the drink.

A familiar bike entered your vision, South on the side of the road offering you a helmet 'Hop on, and I'll give you a ride.' You dismissed him right away 'No I'm fine.' You started to walk again but he stubbornly follow you behind closely 'Come on, don't be like that gorgeous, I'm tryna be nice here!:

You stop on your track yet again and glance at him 'I said that I am fine and please, stop being so nice. It doesn't suit you, at all.' He laughs watching you leave but still tailing behind like a puppy.

Once you reached the gate of your house, you finally turn your back on him again 'You can leave now, I think?' He smiles at you 'I'm still hoping we can go home together tomorrow, don't ya think?' You immediately said no.

'Just stop bothering me, South.' For a wink, you could see a glimpse of hurt in his expression but he shook it away 'You said my name.' You stayed quiet and he chuckles before he leaves the spot.

The last few weeks are you stressing over the tall giant about how he always insists on fetching you home but yet again, gets rejected? Today is no different, he'll follow around you with his bike until you made it safely to your house 'You know, you don't have to do all of this right? I'm fine.' You inform but he shrugs 'Who knows, one day you might change your heart and let me send you.'

You scoff and look away 'You really should stop bothering me.' The following words he said almost make your eyes fall out of their sockets 'Okay,' Did you hear that right? He agreed!

He waves at you before resounding his engine and fled away.

You stare at the spot he was at earlier before you went inside your house 'I'm home!' Silence. Of course, it's gonna be like this all the time anyway. Your parents are out for work leaving you alone in the house, to yourself.

You eat your dinner which is an instant noodle and a can of milk before you tread upstairs to your room to do work and fall asleep for school.

It's two days since you told South to leave you alone - he did. Two days and no sign of the gigantic male. No more of his annoyingly loud voice, his roaring bike, his sweet nothings when he spoke to you, or his quick remarks. A part of you is relieved that he's no longer here to bother with your work but another part of you feels empty. His loud noise used to fill your quiet surrounding but now it's gone back to square one.

A chime on the door jolted you up from your seat but it wasn't him. It was an old lady with a toddler. They ordered your cafe's most requested drink and now it makes you think of him, again.

How he bought this drink just to give it to you.

You serve them and after an hour they left, you let out a sigh of frustration and pack your stuff realizing that it's almost time to wrap up. The bell chimes one last time for the day 'I'm sorry but we're closing.'

'Oh, I'm not here to order.' The familiar voice almost makes you drop your belongings, and as you turn around you met with him. He's looking at you with his usual wide grin. 'Long time no see, gorgeous.' You almost smile at him but instead you scoff 'Yeah, as if.' He laughs at you 'I see the shop is shutting down. Going home?' You look down for a moment before nodding 'Yes, why?' You hope he would ask and he did.

'Cool, mind I send you off?' You get your bag and left the store, locking it 'I'll take that as a Yes.' He give you the helmet 'What about you?' He shrugs 'I don't need it.' He leap on his bike first with you following suit.

'Hold on tight,' You look at him, one brow forward 'What you mean-' He speed up the bike so suddenly that you almost flew from your place.

'Oh, my God!' You exclaim loudly, hands instinctively around his waistline hugging him tightly 'Slow the fuck down!' You yell and slap his chest multiple times but he laughs instead

The proximity between you two allows you to feel the vibration eliciting through his body once he laughs. You keep hugging - even tighter than before that your head about to bump against the back of his shoulder.

The ride home wasn't long and he finally stops. You dismounted from the bike took off the helmet and fix your hair 'Let me,' He messed up your hair making you hiss but he shush you before he gently put it back in its place and smiled 'There!' You glance at the mirror and smile to yourself 'Thanks,' You give him back his helmet and you stayed there not knowing what to say 'I'll go!'

He holds your hand with a smile on his face 'Come on, do you think I did it for free?' Your eyes widen making him laugh for the nth time of the day - night.

'What do you want?' Eyebrows cocking together as you wait for him to speak up 'Go on a date with me.' He casually said making you jump on your place 'Seriously?' He shrugs

You look between him and the road, contemplating. You give yourself an extended breath before you answer him 'Okay,' Well, it's not bad to try, was it?

He looks at you with his usual grin 'Great! I'll pick you up tomorrow!' He started his bike and waved off at you as you duplicate.

You rush inside your house feeling yourself hot all over. You did it. You are going on a date with South! A guy you hated - supposedly.

The next morning, you woke up early - extra early to choose your dress, not exactly a dress but a fit to wear. South did mention that this date is unlike the usual romantic date people have, he did say that he'll stroll around the city and go to his apartment. You disagree thinking of the possible worst ideas but he dismisses them. He said that he wants to show you something, something he's passionate about other than fighting. So you eventually agreed to it

You put your hair in two low buns and did some makeup to adore your face. After that, you put on the fit and lastly put on your New Balance sneaker.

It was nearly 3 when South picked you up but unlike the usual, he came with his bike but without the helmet per your request not to mess your hair up. You mount the bike behind him, adjusting it in place, and hug his waist before he started the engine and sped off.

You two ride around the city stopping by different places for food. He bought you ice cream, a soda drink, and fish-shaped taiyakis.

You two would sit by the road eating your lightt snacks before continuing with the strolling date.

It was almost five when he stopped at a house. It was big and similar to yours but maybe bigger. He turns off his bike before he hops off his bike and helps you on with it too.

You two strut inside his house to his room. It was quite big but it's dimmed. The room is painted in a dark navy blue color and it is spacious. The only thing inside is his bed, a walk-in closet if that counts, and an old piano.

He ushers you to follow him as he pulls out a wooden stool and sits on it offering you to sit beside him. His hand gently stroked the soundboards 'It's been a while!' He laughs pressing on one of the random keys before he aligns his hands on the boards.

'Hear closely.' He plays a tune, a gently melodic tune. It was vague and fast but it was calming too. His harsh but gentle pressing on the boards as he keeps playing the tune with his eyes closed and mouth gaping into a smile.

You watch him intensely but at the same paying attention to the melody. It sounds, tragic. After some point he stops playing and chortles once more 'That turns out very bad, isn't it?' You look at him still impressed by his performance 'That was - Decent. I don't know much about music nor classic instrument like this but I could tell that it was beautiful.' He grins at you giving you a pet on the head before he rejoins the piano playing yet another one.

You watch but after some time your gazes fall somewhere inside his room. His room is dark and clouded over. If depression is room, it would be like his but that one corner caught your attention. That one place where a rack is, placed right above the bed and a line of stuffed animals is neatly on it.

You almost couldn't believe it! This gigantic male over here, whom you - the civilians around here know as the brutal and vicious leader of the underground delinquent gang, Rokuhara Tandai is passionate about classical music and instruments, very skillful too but not only he also got bunch of cute stuffed animals and plushies as well?!

You laugh to yourself at the thought

Maybe he wasn't so bad himself.

You continued watching him play to the last and clap your hands once he was done. He turns over to you bowing as he laughs loudly 'I am so fucking cool!' He confessed 'Get over yourself!' You deadpanned making him snort.

You look back at him and the plushies feeling yourself smirking at the idea of exposing him 'Whatever you are thinking, I don't like it!' He honestly said before moving out of the room and you follow 'You are so cute having all the stuffed animals inside your room, who would know that you are such a baby, South!' He looks at you with wide eyes and pretends a scary stare making you, even more, worked out, and ended up laughing once more.

'Such a cutie!' You pinch his cheek, 'Says the one who had to tiptoe to reach my face!'

[bigball-thefrog]

Bath-Time Crocodile X Reader pt2

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Pt1

I wasn't originally going to do a part 2 but I was asked to in the comments by @llynx7 so it took me a bit to think of a part 2 but I hope it's good enough you enjoy it :)

Warnings/Tags:

Lime

Massage

Bathing with significant other

Accidental genital touching

Implied sex at the end

______________________________

Reader POV

It's been a few months since I first took that bath with Crocodile. Our relationship has actually improved a lot! It went from it being our monthly bath to him wanting to bath together almost every day. He's less grumpy when we go out, we go on more dates, he's just more affectionate in general even when we're in private.

He came home and sat on the couch tired and looking exhausted and sweaty. I sat down next to him and he pulled me into his lap. "Is the bath ready?" He asked as he placed his head on my shoulder. "Yes but unfortunately I accidentally made it too hot that I think it would make you more stressed..." I said. He groaned and sat up straight, "Now what? I need that bath and my shoulders are killing me!" His tone was slightly raised and he looked annoyed now. I sat there thinking about how I could still make him happy, and then it struck. "Hey honey, can you lay on your stomach?" "Why?" "Just trust me, I have an idea of what we can do while we wait." Crocodile sighs as he takes me off his lap. He lays face down on the couch and looks back at me, I take off his coat and climb on top of him, straddling his lower back, "What the hell are you doing!?" he snaps sounding a bit nervous. I lean down and whisper to him, "Just trust me, remember I want nothing but the best for you." He sighs and rests his head on his arms. I place my hands on his shoulders and began working away at all the stress built up in his back. It was as hard as a rock with many years of pent up stress, despite the absolute boulder of stress this man has on his back I started to chip away at his stress determined to make him feel more relaxed. He let out a few grunts and sighs and even one or two moans as I put more pressure on his back to crack it a few times.

After about 30 minutes his back was finally free of knots and didn't feel as hard as a rock anymore but more soft and relaxed as the dessert sand, quite fitting I must say. I gave his shoulders a few more squeezes and got off him. He groaned as he sat up facing away from me and only turned hi head to look at me, "Do you think the water is ready yet?", "Well it should be ready by no-" "Go and get in so long, I just need to do something first..." I looked at him a little confused but shrugged it off and went to the bathroom. I stripped down and got in, the water still warm and relaxing. I layed back and waited for Crocodile. I eventually was gonna get out to check on him but stopped when he walked in with his head down and his coat held in front of him and a dark blush on his face. "Honey are you okay?" "I'm fine! Just... Don't look while I get undressed okay?" he said with a hint of embarrassment as he turned around. I was confused because we've seen each other naked a few times now so why is it different this time?

I closed my eyes and waited for him to get in. Instead of him getting in behind me he got in, in front of me with his back towards me and leaned back onto me. Holding back the air trying to escape my lungs from his weight on me I moved back and moved my legs around his waist. "C-Crocodile Honey? What are you doing?" "Just... Just felt like leaning on you for a change, is that wrong?" he snapped back with a slightly annoyed tone I shook my head no and he leaned on me again. I just sighed as I grabbed the soap and started washing him. I washed his shoulders, arms, hair and back and was making my way to the front when I felt him start to tense up. I tried asking him what's wrong again but he refused to say anything, I made my way down his chest and abdomen making sure to clean carefully, I touched his hips and that's when he really tensed up, I thought nothing of it and continued cleaning, but then I felt something stiff. I was confused on what it was so I put both my hands around it and started feeling it up. It was long and very thick, when I got to the top of whatever it was I tapped it carefully to try and figure out what it was, Crocodile moan and let out a shudder as I did, why would he.... Oh... Oh no...........

"Crocodile is that your......?" "Yes. Yes it is..." We both sounded embarrassed as I realized what I was touching. "I am so sorry..." "Please just... Can we just stop talking about it?" "Alright, I'm sorry... Was it.. Was it because of the massage?" "Yes, yes it was..." We then sat in awkward silence in the bath, neither of us wanting say or do anything now, eventually I got out the bath and grabbed my towel. "Where are you going?" He said as he watched me get out. "Sorry sweetie the awkwardness is just too much to handle, I feel like I'm gonna pass out with all the blood running to my cheeks, I'll just... I'll leave you alone for a bit..." I turned to leave but Crocodile quickly gripped my wrist and pulled me back, "Crocodile, what're you-" "You said you wanted to make me feel relaxed right? Well I think I have the perfect way you can help me relax~" I was gonna ask what he meant when he suddenly ripped off my towel with his hook, I gasped loudly and tried to cover myself. Crocodile chuckled and caressed my body with his cold hook, sending shivers down my body, "Yes, this will do perfectly~" he said as a smirk grew on his face. He put his hook under my chin and slightly lifted it up so I could look at him, "Now sweetheart, get back in he tub~"

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I know I said once a week but some stuff came up with my dental problems and I'm starting exams soon so I'm a bit stressed rn but to make it up I'll try to post two one-shots this week :) Also if you haven't seen it I've updated my rules list and I will now try and do smit one-shots as well. Please be aware I haven't written smut before so it will most likely not be good but I hope you enjoy anyway.

Kelly🐸

[call-me-little-sunshine84]

Behind Closed Doors (Jim Hopper x female reader ~ 18+)

Characters: Jim "Chief" Hopper x female reader

Rating: Explicit, Minors DNI

Words: 1.4k

Summary: Working at the Hawkins Police Department comes with more benefits than you thought

Warnings: SMUT, unprotected sex, oral sex

A/N: Just another smutty Hopper one shot, apparently I'm stuck on them. Hopefully they're good!

"Good morning, Chief,” you said with a smile when you saw Hopper walk into the station, just like you did every morning. And just like every other morning, he responded with a curt hello as he walked straight into his office and shut the door. You had been working as a receptionist at the Hawkins Police Department for a few months. It wasn’t exactly your dream job, but it allowed you to see him every day.

Jim Hopper was quite possibly the sexiest man you have ever seen. Tall and broad shouldered, he filled out his uniform so nicely. You had been trying desperately to get him to notice you. You were always finding reasons to go into his office, even if it’s just to offer to get him coffee. You were lucky to get grunted responses, forget having an actual conversation with him. I just don’t get it, you found yourself thinking. Had you unknowingly done something to offend him? He acted so cold to you most of the time, you had pretty much given up on ever having any kind of shot with him. You had decided to just go to work, do your job, and try to ignore the way he made you feel, ignore the fact that he was the subject of pretty much all of your obscene fantasies. Easier said than done. 

That’s why it caught you by such surprise when he stuck his head out of his office later that afternoon and yelled for you to come inside. You wondered what in the hell was going on, had you done something wrong? You got up, frustrated, and made your way inside. It was Friday and the workday was almost over, you really just wanted to go home and relax. “Close the door please,” he said as you entered, actually looking you in the eye for once. Am I in some kind of parallel universe you wondered. You inhaled deeply, the lingering smell of his cologne everywhere inside the small room. “Chief, what is this about? Did I do something?” you asked, as a million thoughts ran through your head. “Why would you think that?” he replied, raising an eyebrow at you. “Maybe because in two months you have barely spoken three sentences to me!” you said exasperatedly. 

“Why do you think that is?” he asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “I have literally no idea! I have made every effort to get you to talk to me and you avoid me like the plague. I don’t know what I could have possibly done to you in the short time I’ve been here!” you said, sighing heavily. His normally bright blue eyes darkened. “I was trying to stay away from you because I can’t trust myself to behave around you,” he said under his breath, and you thought you must have misheard him. “What!?!” you replied, your head spinning. 

“You really think I haven’t noticed you? Haven’t noticed the way you look in those skirts you wear, the way your perfume smells when you’re near me? It drives me crazy but I’m your boss and I was trying to stay away. I just don’t know if I can do it anymore,” he told you in a sudden fit of honesty. You stepped closer to him, closing the distance between you. You couldn’t believe this was actually happening. Deciding to match his bold admission you say “Jim, I have been lusting after you since my first day here. I have done everything I could to get you to see me. I want you with every fiber of my body.” 

Oh my God, did I really just say that you thought, knowing it was too late to take it back now. The words hung in the air between you. You noticed then that the blinds were closed and thought to yourself fuck it. Grabbing his uniform shirt, you pulled him toward you and kissed him, deeply and fully. It was like fireworks went off, sparks flying between you. He matched your kiss, wrapping his arms around you. Eventually he pulled back. “Are you sure this is what you want?” he asked, a questioning look in his eyes. “I’ve never been more sure of anything. You’re all I want,” you replied. 

The rest was like all your best fantasies made reality. He kissed you again, his tongue darting past your lips. He tasted like coffee, bitter and sweet at the same time. You felt all the tension leave your body as he completely took control, clearing his desk off with one sweep of his hand. He picked you up and sat you on top of the desk and you wrapped your legs around him, pulling him against you. You began unbuttoning his uniform shirt slowly, wanting to draw this moment out. You finally removed it completely, tossing it over the chair behind him, running your hands through his chest hair. He pulled your shirt off and left you in just your bra and skirt. 

The chill from the air on your bare skin made you shiver. He leaned in and began kissing your neck, making his way down your chest. The feeling of his mustache on your body set you on fire. He reached behind you and unhooked your bra, slinging it to the side. Immediately you felt his mouth on your nipple, licking and teasing, swirling his tongue relentlessly around the sensitive skin. You moaned enthusiastically, still not believing that any of this was real. He moved back up to kiss you again before laying you back flat against the desk. You cocked an eyebrow at him, then realized what he was doing as he lowered himself down in front of you and pushed your skirt up around your waist and threw your panties to the side.

Fuuuuuckkk you thought as he kissed his way up your inner thigh and settled his mouth on your already soaked core. He slowly ran his tongue up your slick folds to your clit and began circling expertly. “Yes Jim,” you hissed. You moaned as he slipped a finger inside you and began pushing it in and out in rhythm with his mouth. 'Yes, please, right there!" you yelled, unable to keep your voice down. At this point, anyone left in the office would without a doubt know what was going on inside.

This man absolutely knew what he was doing. The constantly building pressure had you squirming underneath him, grinding your pulsing pussy on his mouth. “That’s it, cum for me,” he said. Like it was a command, your body obeyed, white hot lightning shooting through you and leaving you gasping. He removed his finger and licked the taste of you off of it before raising you up off the desk. Just seeing that had you even weaker in the knees, desire spreading through you like wildfire. 

He removed his uniform pants, and you gasped in surprise. You had figured he would be big just by his body size, but damn. He spun you around and bent you over the top of the desk, your bare ass in the air, and parted your legs. He entered you slowly, giving you time to adjust to him. You pushed back against him, quickly letting him know it was okay to move. He still took it slow, repeatedly pulling all but his tip out before thrusting his hips and bottoming out in you. He did this over and over, hitting places inside you that you didn't know even existed.

“Oh my God, Jim,” you gasp, feeling your body turn to jelly underneath him. The sound of skin slapping skin filled the room with each thrust. He gripped your hips tightly and then moved at a faster pace. You felt your walls clench around him, and he groaned your name. You had never heard anything sound so sexy. You arched your back up against his chest, and the change in angle made him hit that spot inside of you, the one that made you see stars. Before you knew it, your second orgasm overtook you, and you could feel your legs shaking around him as it crashed over you. He followed soon behind you, the feeling of you tightening around him more than he could take. He filled you up, shooting his seed deep inside you. He collapsed against you with a grunt, eventually standing up and giving you a chance to get dressed before you started leaking down the inside of your legs.

The reality of what you had just done was heavy in the air. “So, see you Monday,” you said with a half smirk as you headed for the door. “Definitely darlin’, and be ready to stay late,” he replied with a wink and laugh. 

[thorne-kreizler-fanfiction]

Big Fight (Thorin Oakenshield)

Type of Fanfic: One-Shot

Relationship: ThorinXFem!Reader

Word Count: 2060

Summary: Thorin and you went into a big argument and are close to make amends.

Warnings: Jelaousy. And just a few mentions of a heated argument in a marriage.

Author's Notes: ∙English is not my first language, so please be nice.

∙If you want to give constructive criticism or correct my grammar (revise my work before I upload it) you are more than welcome to write to me or send me an ask suggesting it. This shot in particular was revised by @sssiriusly (go read their fics).

∙I have to say that this idea emerged after reading @fizzyxcustard's One-Shot: “Misunderstanding” (by the way, I really really hope you like this!).

Suggestions: Reblog, write your reaction and enjoy!

...

You were the wife of Thorin II Oakenshield, king of Erebor. At the same time, you both were extremely mad at each other.

Two months ago, you had a big argument with Thorin, the biggest fight in the history of your relationship. The truth was, you barely remembered how it started; with the jealousy of Thorin. He caught you laughing with another dwarf and ignored you the rest of the day, until you confronted him. Then Thorin screamed at you, which made you angry and made you bite back. With uncontrollable anger from both sides, the argument escalated until he hurt your feelings, and you hurt his.

It happened the way it always did; Thorin got offended and then didn't know any other way of defending himself than spitting your flaws and mistakes on your face. Besides, he would turn the tables and your words to make you seem like the bad guy.

“Do not speak to me of loyalty!” He said. “He hasn't stopped getting closer to you in such an inappropriate manner, and you have never done anything to stop him! People might think you actually enjoyed it!”

You closed your eyes and placed your forehead into your hands, trying to forget about the argument. But the memories kept coming back to your mind.

“I'm so sick of you!” You screamed. “Go away and never talk to me again!”

You shook your head, sighing. You had to work on your outbursts, as well as Thorin's needed to work on his jealousy.

Luckily, a knock on your chamber's door (you and Thorin slept in different rooms again) distracted you from the memories. “¿My Queen?” You heard Lily's voice, your personal servant.

“Come in.” You said with a small voice. Lately you hadn't talked to anyone. At your request, you stayed in your chamber every day, not being bothered by anyone, and only going out to read under the sun to stretch your body and relax for a moment. But you never came across anyone, avoiding all kinds of contact. Neither did you eat with Thorin, like you used to do; You had asked for servants to take dinner to your chamber.

“My Queen,” Lily said, while entering the chamber. “I have come to bring your dinner,” she took a pause before talking again “and to tell you the King asked me to bring you this…”

“Do not say more.” You interrupted her, looking through the window with a frown, watching the midday sun. “Please leave it on the desk and retire” you said with a brittle voice. The situation hurt you a lot, but unless Thorin apologized in person, you didn't wish to maintain contact with him. That was your pride taking over you.

“My Queen,” Lily spoke again, after leaving the tray in the desk. “he insists on me telling you he wants you to join him for dinner…”

“Please, get out.” you repeated and closed your eyes. “I do not wish to be bothered.”

You heard the door closing and laid in bed. You allowed yourself to be true to your feelings for the first time in days, and started crying. You cried until you were so exhausted that you fell into a deep sleep.

…

Thorin had been in the dining hall for an hour. He had tried, since midday, to concentrate on his duties, but the thought of whether you would accept or not his invitation to dinner was unsettling him.

The servants started to run everywhere, cooking as fast as possible and preparing the table for the King who had arrived earlier. When dinner was ready, Thorin asked to speak with Lily.

“Tell me what she said” he demanded, his voice slight but deep as always.

“My King,” she whispered, knowing what was about to come “she asked not to be bothered…” Thorin slowly nodded, closing his eyes while growling. “She never gave an answer, but…”

“You can leave now” Thorin interrupted.

“Yes, My King” she rushed to the kitchen.

“I'm so sick of you! Go away and don´t talk to me again!” he remembered your words, and the anger grew stronger in him.

The door closed, and to that it followed the noise of plates, cups and food crashing against the floor with a loud sound. Thorin yelled from the deepest of his chest, getting up. He then took the tablecloth and stretched it until he had thrown every bottle and tray to the ground. He pressed the fabric between his hands while agitatedly breathing. The guards flinched, and it had been heard from the kitchen the mess Thorin made, making the servants prepare themselves to clean the dining hall.

The King left and the place remained silent.

…

You opened your eyes and stood up quickly after realizing you had fallen asleep. You looked around and saw only darkness. When your eyes got used to the gloom, you lighted the candle from your light table and the fireplace. You sat for a while in front of it, eating the dinner that had been brought to you hours ago.

You were feeling numb, but not physically. You couldn't think of anything or concentrate on your feelings, only on the rising fire in front of you, warming your body.

When you finished eating, you decided to read a while under the moonlight. You took the tray to your desk, and there you saw it; a letter. You frowned, and when you started thinking and stirring in your memories, you remembered that Lily had left something Thorin wanted to give you. But that had been many hours ago.

You dropped the tray and rapidly took the envelope. The truth was, that even while acting indifferent, you cared about Thorin, a lot. No stupid fight could ever make you stop loving him and worrying about him. While your plate and cup tinkled, you sat in front of the fireplace and opened the letter. It read:

“I wish to apologise for my manners. What I said wasn't fair, and I haven't been sincere with you and my feelings towards you, my givashel. I do not wish for this fight between us to keep affecting us. Please, do me the honour of joining me for dinner tonight.

-Thorin Oakenshield”

You put your hand to your mouth, both trembling. You looked out the window, and deduced it was almost midnight.

You sighed with repentance and ran out of your bed chamber. While you rushed to the dining hall, going down stairs and walking through corridors, many heads turned to look at you. You even met Dwalin while he was coming out of a door in one of the hallways. Well, you rather collided with him.

“My Queen!” he exclaimed, surprised.

“I am so sorry, Dwalin.” you sighed, agitated. “I am in a rush.”

“Then I won't stop you.” he said and stepped aside, so you could follow your way.

You lowered your head as a quick greeting and kept on running. Before stepping on another pair of stairs, you turned around so Dwalin could hear you asking:

“Do you happen to know, by any chance, where Thorin is?” you shouted.

“I do.” he said, not turning around to look at you.

“Oh…” you went to where he was. “And… Could you tell me?”

He sighed and looked at you. “He asked not to be bothered by anyone, no exceptions... I cannot tell you” he murmured looking away, as if he didn't want you to hear his answer.

“Dwalin…” you lowered your head with tears in your eyes. “Please,” you almost went down on your knees to beg “tell me where he is. I made a mistake and need to make amends with him.” Since you didn't hear an answer, you kept on trying to persuade him. “I think you realise Thorin and I haven't been… well.” he looked at you. “You worry about him as much as I do, and I'm sure that if we don't solve our problem now, he might lock himself in… wherever he is.” Dwalin looked away, sighing.

And then you remembered; you were the Queen of Erebor. You shouldn't be begging to talk to your husband. So, you spoke as serious as you could “I order you to tell me where he is.”

Dwalin looked up, surprised, concern and repentance invading his eyes. “He's at the blacksmith's.”

You looked at him with a hopeful smile. You whispered a “Thank you” and rushed to the forge.

…

The rhythmic sound of the hammer against the iron and Thorin's growls invaded the place. He still thought about you. It had not been possible for him to take you out of his mind during the night, so he made it his goal stay there, crafting and refining to appease his feelings.

Even before opening the gate, you could hear your husband’s growls, and that worried you. It wasn't a new thing for him to get even with his crafting, but this time, you thought you were the reason of his huge anger.

You opened the gate slowly, almost not wanting him to hear you. But he did, and the sound of the hammer stopped. “Is asked not to be interrupted.” he said with a low, agitated voice. He then turned around, and when he saw you, the hammer fell to the ground with a loud noise.

The place stayed silent. You couldn't watch him, and less could you talk to him. For a moment you thought of running back to your lonely chamber and locking yourself up. What if he was still mad? And what if he didn't want to see you?”

“Amrâlimê” Thorin whispered and slowly approached you.

In that moment, all fear and doubt vanished. You remembered the times he called you that, kissed you and made you remember you were his One. And when you saw him, you remembered how much you loved him and longed for being with him.

When you met his gaze, Thorin quickened his step and came fast in front of you. He took your hands in his and went on his knees, resting his forehead on your wrists while he kissed your knuckles. “Amrâlimê…” he repeated, and you felt his warm breath against your hand. You were frozen. “You are here.”

“Yes, I am.” you whispered without knowing what to say.

“You sound doubtful” Thorin said, insecure, and slowly raised his head, linking your gazes. “Don't you want to be with me?”

“I do, I do. I do want to be with you.” you said quickly. “Is just that… I wasn't expecting this reaction from you.”

“After moons of not seeing you, how else would I react?” he asked, getting up. You could see him close, admiring his bright eyes and paying attention to every one of his handsome features.

“Is just that… I never thought you would want to see me.” you said, lowering your gaze.

“And why would I not want to see you?” he asked, almost confused. “I love you.”

You looked at him raising your eyebrows, outraged. “Allow me to think...” you said looking at the ceiling, crossing your arms. “First you treated me like a traitor, then you did not come looking for me in months, and after that you told Dwalin not to be bothered by anyone, no exceptions…”

“I asked that to Dwalin because I did not see the possibility of you looking for me.” he said, a bit ashamed.

“Why would I not look for you? I love you.”

This time Thorin was the one who raised his eyebrow. “Allow me to think...” he mimicked your corporal actions. “First you told me not to talk to you ever again, then you locked yourself in your chamber for months, and after that you did not come to join me for dinner…”

“I fell asleep before reading your letter.” you explained, laughing. “I am sorry.”

Thorin shook his head, and put your foreheads together. “I am sorry, givashel.”

You both looked at each other, melting in a hug and closing your eyes. Little by little, you were getting closer and closer until you kissed; It was a slow kiss, deep and loving. You both had to talk about Thorin's jealousy and your outbursts, but that kiss told you that you wouldn't be doing it alone; You would work together in the amending of your relationship.

...