How I push through writing when I don't feel like writing.
Here are some of the techniques that I use to help me write more often or more consistantly when my laziness/depression/anxiety starts to take over.
I watch TV. I don't do it with the purpose of zoning out though. I watch something popular and well-liked such as the LOR or Harry Potter to get new ideas on how I can develop my story and apply their in-depth world-building ideas to help develop mine. Without plagarizing of course!!!!
Zoning out and daydreaming. As I have mentionned before, daydreaming is a huge part of my story outlining and world-building process. I'll stand in the shower, or take a walk and think about how my charcaters would act/react/behave in situations, mundane or not. Doing this gives me a better sense of my characters, and sometimes gives me ideas for scenes I use later on.
Work on writing related projects. These work well at keeping me distracted while still being productive on my writing goals. Example, I have one story I am working now, I made a new language (alphabet and numbers included) to include as a cool and fun component for the book. So, at times when I don't wan't to write, I continue creating the dictionary (very fun, 8/10 would recommend). Also, for the same book, my characters don't work off the Georigian calendar and 24 hour clock, so I've been working at creating a new calendar (harder than it seems, 2.5/10 dont recommend). These are side projects that help my story, without having to write.
Reading. You saw this one coming, I know. Reading is great, especially when you're editing, your writing style will unconsciously change to be more similar the author you were just reading. Also, most importantly, I'll be reading and think, "this story is really good, but you know what story I like even better? Mine." then change to writing.
This one is my biggest life saver!! I learnt about a year ago that sometimes I'll get bored of writing a story, and have difficulty keeping on track. That's why I finished my first book in 2016 and just started editing the first draft last week. The solution for me was to work on multiple projects at once, because it was much harder to be bored of multiple stories. I stick to 2, but will sometimes add a third. This is easy for me, because I have a list of over a dozen series I want to write. Don't abandon one project for another, use them as a distraction/ motivation for each other, so you're always furthering at least one project. I've never heard someone say, "oh no, i accidentally worked on this other writing project for three months instead of the other writing project I was doing. Dammit." No, we're just happy we have written something. Be sure to have well outlined story lines before starting, don't just start writing randomly or you'll reach a point where you don't know where to go from there.
Author/ writer projects. Maybe this is building a following, or community to share your projects and engage with. Tumblr, Insta, Reddit, whatever it is. My hope this year is to start up my website to offer publishing services (editing, graphic design, short writing courses) and build a following as a writer. (See what I did there? Never a bad time to self-promote ;) ) Having your own projects like this will help you in the future when you're going to try to publish and sell your books!
Talk with friends and a writing community. Never underestimate the passion that will burn inside you when talking about your story, or when others are talking about theirs. Surrounding yourself with a positive writing community can be the best thing for you as a writer.
Write or read (your story) every day. I'm not going to be one of those people that say you need to write 1000 words a day, that's a lot. But maybe try for 100? That could maybe only take 5 minutes, and at the end of the year that's still over 36 thousand words of a novel. Or just read your story, and I've always found it helped me get in the creative mood.
Make a playlist of songs that remind you of your characters, your story, or just puts you in the mood to write. Then play it ONLY when you're having trouble writing. Playing it while writing will not help, you'll get annoyed with the songs.
Just really can't do it today? That's okay, take a break. You deserve it. There's always tomorrow.
Does anyone else have ways they push themselves to keep writing? Let us know in the comments!
summary: kate comes home tired and needy :( part two to this fic. build up drabble to part three
warnings: none! fluff cause its kate :3 this is kinda shorter than the last one soz. again, every divider is a skip. most are constant cuz im lazy. didnât know how to end oops!!!
rpf dont read it if ur uncomfy thx
a/n: all yjs reqs r still itw soooo theyâll be out soon poopies đ also my single part drabble for kate is lowk marinating in my drafts and i donât have the motivation to finish itâŠ
its been 5 months since you and kate finally ended up together. pretty long, right? but you two never really got the hang of this thing, especially after remembering how long those feelings between you two had been brewing up for. it was still hard for you to show up to her games and practice due to soccer season, and the second it ended, you showed up to nearly every single one of them.
âi really canât come this time, baby, i told you!â you grumble while kate drags you across the dorm. they had their practice game at carver today but you couldnât make it, which made kate upset. âdilanni is gonna kill me if i donât show up.â your soccer team needed to show up together for this fundraiser, and it was during the offseason. fucking lame. you hated letting her down all the time but some things like this just needed to be done.
kateâs fingers grip at your sweater sleeve, her eyes soft, and lips slightly pouting. âcan you please just say you feel sick!? youâll finish quicker than i will and itâs not like they wonât let you in.â she begs and tugs a little at it. her height makes you a little overwhelmed but sheâs slightly bent at the knees and trying to make herself seem smaller than she really is. âkate, its just practice. its not like its the final fours yet.â you sigh and make her stand up straight. your eyes dart to hers and you bring your hands up to cup her face. the way she leans into your touch makes your face flush up like never before.
âyeah, but you always show out! i know weâre still trying to keep this on the down low still but i love pointing at you in the crowd before i make a shot during our practices.â she complains, trying to pull her head away from your hands but you keep her in place like a vice. your thumb brushes up against her face and she sighs under her breath. all those shots that she makes have all been for you ever since. and you didnât even know that. everything she did on the court was meant for you. âiâll make a deal with you, okay?â your words make her feel a little bit better and she nods ecstatically.
âwhen you get back we can do whateverrrr you want to make you feel better about me not showing up. does that sound good?â you propose, the idea crossing your mind after you realize that she just wants to spend that time with you while her teammates try to piece together this big puzzle. none of them know other than caitlin, and theyâre completely unaware of you and kateâs relationship. âyes! okay, deal! deal deal dealâŠ!â she blurts out and smiles stupidly, leaning her head towards you again as a sign that she wants a kiss.
you give it and let go of her face, wrapping your arms around her waist quickly and pressing another big kiss to her cheek. âdonât work yourself too hard out there.â you breathe out and pat her back before letting go of it. âthis fundraiser should only be an hour, trust me.â kate just shrugs and smiles again, less big but you still know that sheâs pretty happy at your little proposition for when she gets back. the moment you walk out of that door, her face drops and she rubs awkwardly at the back of her neck. sheâs alone now, and doesnât know what to do. youâve been with her for every game and every practice so sheâs lost most of her motivation to go. âaw, dang it..â
after your little fundraiser, you come home exhausted and dreary when you realize kate is gone too. you two are exactly the same person, lost without one another. itâs cute but sometimes itâs hard. this whole relationship thing is such a different concept and it makes your head hurt. the lock clicks on the door and you dig through your closet, finding a pair of pjs and some small shirt kate likes seeing you wear for âsome reasonâ. which is what she says every time you ask.
a quick change and your casual clothes scatter across the floor before you basically face plant into the pillows. a warm feeling fills up your body while you fall asleep, a feeling that seems different still without kate. you two always sleep and take naps together so this is another thing you have to get yourself used to.
the stupid fundraiser ran longer than it should have. at least another 30-45 minutes extra and you werenât very prepared for it. kids were all over the place too and you were somewhat on babysitting duty? according to your teammates. you stood with all the kids for at least an hour and the questions they asked you were probably the stupidest things ever.
the sound of the door opening is what wakes you up, fingers instinctively rubbing your eyes and sitting up. youâre met with the sight of kate rummaging sluggishly through her backpack and taking out clothes. she mumbles out a small âhiâ and yawns, walking into the bathroom. the sound of the shower hits your ears and you just lay back down, trying to keep yourself awake to fulfill that proposal you made earlier.
a few moments after the shower turns off, the bathroom door opens and your mattress shifts in weight, a few drops of water coaxing you to open up your eyes. kate is sitting on the edge of the bed and she tucks herself in, burying her face into your neck. âhow was practice?â you mutter, moving her wet strands of hair to sprawl out on the bed. she grumbles into your neck instead of instantly responding. âtiring, huh?â you ask.
âextremely.â she whispers breathily and looks up at you. kateâs eyes are slightly droopy and her lips are pursed. your arm wraps itself around her back and you tilt her head up with your hand, making her look up at you as you start rubbing her temples gently. kateâs eyes are opening and closing continuously while your fingers continue to massage her head and she huffs heavily a few times.
you push kateâs head into your neck again and slide your hands onto her shoulders, patting them gently to make her fall asleep easier. she doesnât though. instead, she hoists her head up and quickly locks her lips with yours, grabbing your waist and holding herself up with her arms. her fingers are gripping at the bedsheets tight and sheâs kissing you a little bit too hard. not that you mind, of course. âmmmf.. hey?â you pant and pull away from the kiss, making eye contact with kate and realizing where sheâs placed her hands.
âiâm just kissing you.â kate mumbles and doesnât even bother waiting for you to finish catching your breath. she kisses you again, propping herself up on her elbows and grabbing your arms to wrap around her waist. ây- yeah! but like⊠let me get a breather at least.â you laugh quietly. youâre still trying to catch your breath and the more you try to get away, the more persistent she becomes. âcâmon. youâre just sleepy, baby. get your butt to bed and youâll be alllll good in the morning.â you smile and push her shoulders down.
kate ends up falling onto your body and her nose brushes up against your cheek, her lips running up and down your neck as she starts kissing all over it. âone more..â she rasps out and slides her hands underneath your shirt. she starts to claw your back a few times, whining into your neck when you try to push her away. âkate, please.â you grunt and pull back, nearly falling off of the edge of the bed.
her face is the same one as earlier. her big, pretty blue eyes going soft and her lips pouting. she looks like a sad puppy and you hate it. you hate how you canât say no to it. âjust one more! this is the last one and iâll sleep, i swear.â kate spits out and tilts her head to the side. she yawns, her eyes getting watery and now you know that itâs basically over for you. âi canât.â you mutter. âyes, you can. itâs just one more kiss, babe. please?!â
âall you have to do is give me one, and iâll sleep!â
âyou say this all the time! youâre gonna say that youâll âsleep afterâ but the second my lips land on yours, youâre gonna act like an animal.â
âthatâs not true.â
âoh, yeah? watch.â
you cup her cheeks and she grabs your waist gently, your lips going in for one quick one. when she feels how warm you are and how much youâre trying to really prove a point, she just helps your claim anyways. kateâs lips are against yours again, kissing hungrily.
i mean, sheâs practically eating away at your face.
pairings: george russell x hamilton!ensemble!reader (fc: ella kora)
summary: george ends his softlaunch with a cast member of hamilton on the westend
authors note: sorry for not posting in forever but ive had no motivation and i cant find the want to finish some of my drafts so have a brand new smau thats been BREWING in my brain ever since i saw hamilton the other week. its literally one my favorite musicals so you know i had to incorporate my two interests, you dont need to have seen hamilton or know about the story for this!
important: rg63 is georgeâs private instagram
masterlist
georgerussell63
liked by alex_albon, yourusername and 366,450 others
water, sports and sunsetsâïž
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user7 shirtless george is back!!
user10 hes soâŠ
user45 THE SOFTLAUNCH HAS TO END SOON RIGHTđđ
user12 i miss when george wouldnt make me feel single every postđ
yourusername oh myyyđ«
yourusername
liked by jakeh_j, lilymhe and 235 others
smiles (mostly) all round this summerâïž
tagged: rg63 and jakeh_j
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rg63 miss you darlingđ€
yourusername miss you too loveđ
jakeh_j dinner soon?
yourusername yes!! g is coming to a show soon so we can do it then :)
jakeh_j sounds goodđ
user6 cant wait to see you in hamilton!
yourfriend cutieđ«¶
georgerussell63 and alex_albon have added to their stories
yourusername ahhh cant wait to see you allđ
f1updates
liked by user72, user1 and 2367 others
george, alex and lily with fans today in london
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user1 im the one in the third photo, they were in a rush as they had to go to the theatre but they were all so sweet and took the time to sign a hat i had!
user10 was anyone else with them?
user1 there wasnt! i dont think george was with his girlfriend but she couldâve been waiting for them somewhere elseâșïž
user72 idk why them going to the theatre together is funny but it isđ
user5 right?? it feels so randomđ
user53 i canât believe they watched hamilton before me
georgerussell63
liked by alex_albon, yourusername and 872,426 others
i have been with you since the beginning of your incredible journey of living out your dream of being in the west end. i know how much getting this part in hamilton meant to you and getting to see you on stage brings me so much joy, forever proud of you darlingđ€
tagged yourusername
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yourusername georgeâčïži will love you forever and ever thank you soso much for being by my sideđ
yourusername you have no idea how happy it makes me to know you are in the crowd
alex_albon thanks for being my friend so lily can see her favorite musicalđ
georgerussell63 yeah no worries manđ
yourusername alex i hope you know its me she loves to see, not hamiltonđ€š
alex_albon your wrong.
lilymhe shes very much correctđ«¶
user7 WHAT IS HAPPENING
user5 HARD LAUNCH HARD LAUNCH
user25 WAKE UP GEORGE POSTED HER AHHHH user6
user6 OMG I LITERALLY SAW HER THE OTHER DAYđ
user10 this is so cute (im sobbing)
user8 wow the highway is such a good place to stargaze!!
user83 i cannot cope why is this sođ« đ«
lewishamilton đđ
yourusername
liked by georgerussell63, lilymhe and 6273 others
i look into your eyes and the skys the limit. georgie my love for you is timeless, each day i think about how lucky i am to have you by my side and how lucky i am to get to be the one to love you. you have changed the way i view the world and myself and my life will always be better now youve entered it, and no matter what this chapter in our lives will stick with me forever and alwaysđ
tagged georgerussell63
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georgerussell63 i am so grateful you have come into my life
georgerussell63 i love you so much darling
yourusername i will never stop loving youđ«¶
lilymhe when will i get posts like thisâčïž
yourusername yours is next lovelyđ€
alex_albon babe?? i post you all the time
lilymhe and yet you havent used a lyric from hamiltonđ€š
"Okay, yeah. If you kill a red name, killed a red name-"
"I'll give you a life for that. That's the deal."
"We'll be back together like buddies again, Bdubs."
In participation of Extreme Timed Challenge Gift Exchange hosted by @extremetimedchallengeexchange!
[gifs, full storyboard, behind-the-scene rambles under cut]
Fiddled with gradient maps this time for some additional colors :D
I would have colored in the eyes as well, but I didn't have enough energy left when the event hit the 47th hour xD
Also played around with camera movements. Respect to people who do fan edits and other forms of video/ assets editing 'cause keyframes are so đ
13 hours to draft storyboard this time! Last year I used 16 but with waaay more frames idk how I accomplished that. Probably bc this year I'm drawing more than three(3) characters lmao
Progress Timeline:
[13th hour] finished storyboard/ draft (plany off time...)
[25th hour] lineart for the first 10 seconds (wuh oh)
[36th hour] lineart for the first 25 seconds (oh shit oh fuck gotta shorten it)
[45th hour] finished Bdubs' part (NOOO I DONT HAVE TIME FOR ETHO)
ngl kinda glad i cut it in half rn 'cause i'd have to spend time figuring out shadowDog's design /lh
Designs I used for Lizzie and Joel (old art from 2022 and 2021 respectively) (holy shit i've been here for 3 years???)
Joel *shakes fist* i hate u and ur stupid beard
[Lyrics vibe/scene planning; hours before disaster]
I think most of the drawn parts didn't deviate from the initial idea. Mostly timing adjustments and building upon the vibes. The parts that were changed the most was the "And you caused it (Ă3 combo)".
Went from "vague flashbacks" to "following Etho and co. out of the cave and back to Scott's base while implying who Etho blames with single character focus shots".
The first one is Scott because he suggested the idea. Like, obviously he's to blame. It's not like Etho went along and cemented the deal himself. Scott totally peer-pressured him into it.
The second one is Etho because... well the scene ends up kind of being like. The sight of the Snow Fortress triggering a flashback. (EthosLab the content creator deliberately turned his camera towards the Snow Fortress and holds it there for a second instead of looking at the huge lava pillar right in front of him. What is WRONG with him.)
But also like. Clocks are kind of special to Bdubs right. Whoever gave him a clock basically has his (temporary) loyalty or at the least earned a favor from him. So like. If he hadn't gifted Bdubs the clock, which signifies a closer(?) bond, maybe Bdubs wouldn't be so devoted to him (wrong).
Also serves as a call-back/ reference to the "Prayer-Determination" shot ("pray with clock" in the scene planning screenshot). I like to think that Bdubs weighted his options and thought about "if he will kill/ who to kill" a lot while following the other Red Names. And in that scene he's like, convincing/ motivating himself. Remembering who/ what he's doing this for.
(It is also meant to be part of my giftee's other prompt: "an exploration of the doubt one or both of them felt during the heart transfer that didnât happen after Bdubs killed Lizzie, and the following guilt Etho felt." The Etho section starting from "we're setting fire to our inside for fun" til the end of the animatic is based on that prompt.)
After a brief period of self-blame, it's time to shift it onto someone else! Because you're in denial! If Bdubs hadn't gone red, then Etho wouldn't have to offer the deal. If Bdubs hadn't want to stay as teammates, then he wouldn't agree to the deal. If Bdubs wasn't so devoted to Etho, then he wouldn't have attacked Lizzie and gotten himself killed.
Then the animatic ends with the end of the session :D
...That's longer than I expected but also not that long. If you read through all that, tysm :] Tell me your thoughts! Have a good day/ evening/ night :D
* after learning about the feelings youâd harboured for her for so long, ellie was even more confused than before. however, after spending time away from you and even more time thinking, she realizes that fuck she feels the same way, if not stronger. she only hopes that you still feel the same way and sheâll be able to finally call you hers.
* angst at the beginning if you squint, ellieâs in denial and stupid, ellie lowkey being head over heels in love with you and everything you do, kissing, oral!reader receiving, scissoring, overstim, meanish!ellie, lots of mush
* hello! sorry it took a while for this part to come out, i wanted to make sure the ending was as dramatic as the first part with a satisfying end. i promise im not ignoring you guys i do see all of your sweet messages and requests to tag and i thank you all so much for interacting with me and enjoying what i write bc i enjoy writing it! unfortunately i cant respond 1on1 because this is not my primary account and tumblr hasnât changed it so that alternate accounts can do all the things main ones do
Ê ïŒââżâïŒÊ anyways i dont want to make this too long so im gonna wrap it up but again, thank you so much for the kind words itâs motivating me to continue writing and before i shut up i was just wondering if anybody would be interested in a ballerina!reader x ellie slowburn cuz itâs currently floating around in my drafts and i just wanna make sure it wouldnt flop also lol take a shot every time i use the word jade.
*mdni
*wc - 4k (bonus at the end)
part .1 here
âStop fucking laughing Jesse, itâs not funnyâ Ellie frowned.
Jesse let out one last obnoxious guffaw before handing the joint back to Ellie, who was laying back on her beanbag, so he could wipe a stray tear from his eye.
âYouâre right.â He said, suddenly serious. âItâs fucking hilarious.â He snorted, kicking his legs up and gasping for air.
Dina elbowed him hard from her seat next to him on Ellieâs old green couch, âSheâs right, Jesse shut up.â
After that movie night-turned-love confession, Ellie had utterly broken down. The lines between her friendship with you had blurred so much she couldnât see it clearly if she had fucking glasses on.
Her kiss with you had sent her down a whirlwind path of confusion and guilt. She had no idea where she stood with you and itâd been over a month and a half since sheâs spoken to you.
After that night, Ellie ended things with Cat. She couldnât handle being in a relationship especially when she wasnât even sure she liked the girl she was dating anymore plus the fact you were in love with her. Cat had gotten mad, screaming matches were had and insults were thrown; but it was when she started coming for you, calling you a slut and a homewrecker and saying that she always knew you were trying to steal Ellie from her that she gave her 5 seconds to get the fuck out before she did something she regretted.
Cat had left with a scoff, taking Ellieâs favourite green sweater with her. After doing lots and lots of thinking, Ellie called up Dina for an emergency smoke sesh and to get some advice on what the fuck was going on since she somehow always knew what to do. Only she hadnât known Jesse would be there and the headache he was inducing almost made her throw him out the door and she 100% wouldâve if Dina wasnât there.
âThanks, Dee.â
âOf course, only I just have one question.â Ellie had just finished explaining what had happened between the two of you in the last couple months, hence the reason Jesse was about to pull a muscle from laughing so hard.
âShoot.â
âWhy the fuck did you stay with Cat for so long?â
Ellie groaned, taking a long puff of the joint before passing it to Dina so she could explain.
âI donât fucking know she made me feel..good? And bad..but good. I know this is going to sound crazy but being with someone who was as fucked up as me feltâŠsafe, like I wasnât alone.â
âBut she cheated on you like..a hundred times,â Jesse spoke up, finally recovering from his fit of laughter. Dina shot him a look.
âI know but, after she did, sheâd be so apologetic and loving and I guess I got used to it and liked the amount of love and attention she was giving me so... I stayed and forgave her, again and again. Pretty fucked up, huh?â Ellie laughed dryly.
âOh no, honey. Even the best of us fall victim to love-bombing.â Dina said, a comforting smile on her face.
âYeah thatâs sad and everything but what about â , you treated her like shit.â Jesse said, a hint of sourness in his voice.
âI knowâfuck! I know. Cat got in my head and kept telling me that she liked me and I didnât want to believe it because sheâs my best friend for fucks sake! But in those months I was dating Cat I found myself comparing the two of them more and more and I got scared because there was no way I shouldâve been in love with her so like an idiot, I pushed her away and Cat pulled me in.â Ellie sighed, the retelling of the past couple of months making her cringe at how stupid sheâs been.
She paused, grabbing the joint from Dina to take another drawl. âThen that night after we kissed I realized that fuck, I was in love with her and I kinda hated dating CatâŠwho also took my favourite hoodie.â Ellie said with a huff.
âDamn..you lesbians and your love triangles.â Jesse said, shaking his head.
âShut up man, I know you and Dina have your own crazy shit going on.â Ellie rolled her eyes.
âYes.â Jesse said, getting up to pluck the almost finished joint from her hand, âWe do, but we settle it internally.â
Dina nodded, âAnyways, are you and â âŠâ She trailed off, unsure how to finish her sentence.
âI donât fucking know, I needed some time to think and I wanted to give her some space but itâs been weeks and Iâm fucking terrified sheâs never gonna speak to me again.â
Jesse shook his head, âYou guys have been friends for years, just give her a little more time, sheâll come around.â
âBut what if she doesnât?â Ellie said, leaning forward to hang her head in her hands. âI miss her so fucking much you guys.â
âYou need a distraction,â Dina said suddenly, clapping her hands together.
âI agree.â Jesse nodded his head, putting out the joint on the light blue ashtray sitting on the coffee table. âIâm hungry as hell, go buy us some pizza.â
âFuck you, Iâm not your butler.â Ellie rolled her eyes, again.
âCome on, you know youâre hungry too.â Dina said in a sing-songy voice.
âIâm not.â She was.
âJust go, Iâll Venmo you.â Jesse groaned.
Ellie sighed but got up anyways, grabbing her coat from the back of her seat and walking up to her door.
âFine, but you guys better not just be trying to get me out so you can fuck, again.â
âWe would never,â Dina said reassuringly.
âThatâs exactly what weâre doing.â Jesse shrugged, earning another jab in the side from Dina.
Ellie rolled her eyes for what seemed like the millionth time tonight as she left her dorm. As much as they annoyed her, Ellie was grateful to have Dina (and Jesse) there to help her through whatever the hell was going on.
Her walk to the diner was a long one as she purposely took a different route to get there. Sheâd hate to admit it but the couple was right, she had needed a distraction and the freezing winds against her flushed skin helped along with the high from her earlier joint helping to calm her rapid thoughts and allowing her a minute to breathe.
However, when she pushed open the door to Salâsâher favourite dinerâ it was like every ounce of stress that had just dissipated came flooding back x10.
âEllie,â The girl said, giving her a tight smile from her seat on one of the old stools near the counter.
âCat..â Ellie sighed.
When the two of them were still together, theyâd spent countless date nights here sharing milkshakes and sneaking kisses in the bathroom. Sheâd even considered branding it âtheir spotâ but thank god she didnât because she probably never wouldâve come back again.
âWhat are you doing here?â Ellie asked.
âWhat..just because we broke up means that I canât come here anymore?â Cat laughed dryly, and swirl red her straw around her chocolate milkshake.
âNo, I didnât meanââ
âKidding, I know what you meant.â Cat patted the stool next to her, âSo how are you and â ? You two should be in the honeymoon stage by now, right?â
Ellie shuffled up to the counter, ordering a pepperoni and cheese pizza to go before sitting down gingerly next to Cat.
âActually, we havenât talked since that night.â
âYouâre fucking with me,â Cat said, mouth agape.
Ellie shook her head, âDead serious.â
Cat made a noise, something between a scoff and a laugh before turning to look at Ellie.
âYou havenât even tried reaching out to her? You fucking broke up with me because of herââ
âAmong other reasons.â
She rolled her eyes, âAnd you havenât even talked to her yet?â
âIâm giving her space.â
She shook her head, muttering an âI donât fucking get you, Williams.â before returning to her milkshake.
By then, Ellieâs order was ready and she took the boxes, brushing past her ex after mumbling, âYeah, I know.â
Ellieâs walk back to her dorm started slow, she tried collecting her thoughts, tried to organize and arrange them in a way she could understand but she couldnât focus. Catâs words wrung in her ears, the only thing she could pick apart from the tornado was you, you you you you.
Fucking you.
Your gorgeous eyes that always seemed to find hers and when they did fuck it was like the world stopped, and your laugh oh my god your laugh, itâd been so long since she heard your laugh and how she craved it. Don't even get her started on how you always knew exactly what to say to her when she was feeling down, and how you tasted..like everything sheâd ever wished and more, and how after that night she ached to taste you again, to feel you; how just being near you immediately skyrocketed her mood. She wasnât herself without you and she was the best version of herself when she was.
Could you be addicted to someone? She didnât think so, but somehow with you, it seemed like you could. Ellie wasnât sure when sheâd started running, but as she felt sweat perspire on her brow and her breathing come in as quick laboured breaths all she knew is that she needed to see you.
ââ
She made it back to her dorm, fumbling to open her door while balancing the pizzas in her hand. When she finally threw open the door she ignored the sight of Jesse laying his head on Dinaâs lap and plopped the boxes on the coffee table.
âIâm going to go see her.â She huffed, already making her way to the door to start running to your dorm.
âWhat happened to space?â Jesse called out.
âFuck space!â She yelled back, ditching the elevator and opting for the stairs. Later, sheâd have given you the entire fucking solar system if you wanted, but right now? She needed to see you be close to you, hold you, kiss you.
She pumped her legs harder, silently wishing she had done track for longer than 3 months back in middle school. Her chest burned and her neck and back were slick with sweat but she was almost there. She didnât know what the fuck she was going to say to you but sheâd figure something out.
When she finally reached your building, she brushed past the residence hall director whoâd seen her hundreds of times before and decided on the elevator this time to organize her thoughts a little before seeing you.
Her nerves started to catch up to her as she watched the numbers above the metal door change, was she ready to see you? What if you didnât want to see her? What if you just straight up refused to talk to her?
Before she could chicken out, the elevator had reached your floor. She walked down the hall to your door and took three deep breaths before knocking. She heard a little shuffling from behind your door and a small gasp before you opened it, peeking your head out.
âEllie..â You breathed.
ââ . Please, I need to talk to you.â
Your eyes flashed to the floor, avoiding her pleading gaze. âIs Cat okay with you being here?â
âWe broke up.â
âWhat?â You questioned, letting the door swing open and allowing her to take in your full form. You were wearing fuzzy pyjama pants with cute characters patterned on them and a thick oversized sweatshirt. The whites of your eyes were slightly red and the bags beneath them were prominent. She could tell you had been crying and it made her heart lurch, she wanted to pull you into her chest, breathe you in and never let go.
âYeah, itâ can I come in?â She asked.
âUhm..â You bit your lip, probably thinking whether or not you should let her into your dorm, let her back into your life.
âPlease. I promise Iâll make it quick.â She practically begged, lowering her head so she could lock her jade eyes on yours.
You nodded, moving back so she could step inside. You led her to the small couch in the living room as if she hadnât been there thousands of times before. You sat silently across from her, eyes filled with worry and a tiny gleam of hope and she felt the urge to pull you into her chest bloom throughout her. Of course, she planned on doing that later, but as of right now, she had to set things straight.
âLet me just start off by saying, Iâm sorry. â Iâm so fucking sorry for how I treated you when I was dating Cat.â You tried and failed to ignore the way her voice cracked, pain and genuinity adorned her features.
âWe were both terrible for each other but my fucked up brain thought it made sense that I was with her. That she was what I deservedâŠâ She looked up from fidgeting hands to meet your eyes, she couldnât read your face so she continued.
âIâd been feeling..â She paused, looking up to gather her thoughts. She never really was good with her words, but she needed you to know how much you meant to her, how much love she held for you in her heart. âShit...Iâd been feeling different when it came to you...like I swear to fucking god youâre made of sunlight and sweetness or something cause my heart swells whenever I think of you, and when youâre not with me I feel soâŠ!â She groaned and you giggled, so soft that if her ears werenât trained to hear and take in every sound you made she wouldâve missed it, and her heart softened and swelled and spun and sputtered.
âI pushed you away because I was scared of those feelings, but that night, after we kissed. I realized that... I love you, â . And I completely understand if you never want to see me again, God knows I donât deserve you butââ
âStop.â You said, suddenly standing up to walk over to her.
Her jade eyes searched yours desperately, for any sign of what you were thinking, how you were feeling if you were fighting the same urge as her to pull her into your arms and kiss her like the world was ending tomorrow.
âStop saying that,â She looked at you, confusion flooded her features.
Your soft hands found her rough ones and the warmth that flooded from you to her made her lightheaded, how the hell was it possible to love someone this much?
âEllie, words canât describe how much I cared for you,â
âcaredâ She physically felt her heart rip.
âand I need you to know you deserve everything good in life.â
âDoes that include you?â She said with a weak smile.
You looked to the side, dropping her hands. âYou..hurt me.â
Ellie shot up faster than sheâd ever moved in her life, her hands coming up to cup the sides of your face, âAnd I want to rip my fucking heart out every time I remember, but I need you in my life, lovebug.â
Your eyes finally met hers and you could practically hear the âwhooshâ from your resolve flying out of your body. Youâd never seen a shade of green so beautiful, so passionate, so desperate.
This time, it was your eyes flicking to her lips and you didnât even have a second to pull back before her lips were on yours. This kiss had the same amount of wanting as your last one, but it was softer, slower. Like if she went too fast youâd disappear from her hands and she couldnât lose you again.
She pulled away only to place strawberry kisses along your neck and collarbone, eliciting that same sweet sound she had heard from you only a few weeks prior and she knew she needed to have you.
Your hands tugged gently at her top and she shrugged off her coat, lips still connected to your neck. Her hands dipped beneath your sweater to trace soft squiggles against your stomach with her short nails.
She released her hold on your neck and spun you around so that you were sitting on your couch and she was towering over you.
She watched as your chest rose and fell rapidly, how your eyes met hers, glossed over in a way sheâs never seen before, your soft slips glistening and slightly swollen. Sheâd never been more turned on in her life.
She knelt, her veiny hands hooking onto the top of your pants and underwear before she looked back up at you,
âIs it okay if I take these off?â
You nodded fervently and bit your lip as she slid them off, ever so slowly. She had waited too long to do this, youâd better believe she was going to savour each moment.
You felt the cold air hit your cunt and her mossy eyes immediately snapped to it, she looked as if she was in a trance. Sheâd been staring for so long you wouldâve gotten self-conscious if not had she said,
âSo fucking pretty.â
Heat rose to your cheeks and your eyes focused on the wall to the side of you but you scrunched them closed when you felt her lick a stripe up your folds.
Youâd heard from a friend of a friend who was friends with Cat that Ellie gave insane head. And of course, anger and jealousy and bitterness swirled through you at the thought of her performing such acts on another person, so for your own well-being you denied and refused to believe it.
And fuck were you eating your words. Her tongue swirled expertly around your cunt and your eyes were practically rolling to the back of your head, and the borderline pornographic sounds you were making were like fucking music to her ears.
âFuck so good, Ellie.â
Sheâd never admit it but she was a sucker for praise so with the words that fell from your beautiful mouth she made sure to speed up her movements, your legs were shaking at this point and somehow your hand had found its way into her auburn locs, tugging softly which resulted in soft grunts from her that reverberated through your body and cause a feeling like no other.
That familiar feeling began welling up inside, a knot that grew tighter, and tighter, and tighter until snap. Your thighs trembled violently and your throat felt hoarse from how much you were screaming, despite your climax, Ellie was still between your legs and the sensation was becoming a bit too much.
You tried to close your close but a veiny hand gripped your thigh, forcing you open once again. You peered down into her jade eyes, her pupils were blown so wide that they looked almost entirely black and a slight shiver ran through your body, a good shiver. They were demanding and bordering hungry.
Before you knew it her mouth was back in you, sucking and lapping up everything you would give her. Itâs when her tongue slipped into you that you started to feel fucking delirious. Sobs and moans of her name tumbled out of you as your hold on her hair tightened and you were nearly riding her face.
âEllie..fuck, please so close, âs close âsââ
Your eyebrows knitted together and a silent moan escaped you as you gushed on her face and she finally pulled away from you, giving both of you a chance to catch your breath.
âHoly shit.â She breathed out, wiping the bottom of her freckled face with the back of her hand. That hungry look at disappeared and the familiar love drunk one had replaced it.
âI should be saying that.â You said airily.
She smiled, âYou taste really fucking good, yâknow that?â
You shook your head bashfully and she stood up, her knees aching from kneeling so long and sat next to you before pulling you in for a short but deep kiss, allowing you to taste yourself on her tongue.
âNow you do.â
You smiled and it melted her soul just a teensy bit, but she could get sappy about it later. Right now? She needed to fuck you so good youâd laugh whenever you thought about your past lovers in comparison to her.
âCan you lay down for me, bug?â She asked, so sweetly you almost forgot she basically sent you to heaven just a few minutes prior.
She stood up to remove her shirt and briefs and allow you to remove your shirt and get comfortable on the couch. She slid between your legs, hoisting one of them over her shoulder as she aligned her hips with yours.
âTell me if itâs too much, alright?â
You nodded and she lowered herself onto you, her lean thighs keeping her upright as she agonizingly slowly rocked against you. You whined at her pace and she tutted.
âCome on, pretty, use your words.â She said, smirking lazily down at you.
âNeed you to go faster.â You begged.
She nodded, speeding up her pace and drawing out a high-pitched whimper from you. Her eyes were practically fixed on your chest as she watched them bounce and sway with each movement. One of her hands came down to toy with your nipple while the other one held your leg steady so she could grind relentlessly against your clit.
The movements had started unsteady but as the two of you found a rhythm that was pleasurable to both of you, even Ellie couldnât hold back the raspy moans and groans, not to mention her finger on your nipple which made your already sopping cunt gush even more, giving her the ability to glide across you back and forth.
Your hips bucked against her avidly and her eyes rolled back into her head as chants of your name fell from her lips over and over again.
âSo good â , feel âs good.â She rasped.
You froze beneath her as your third orgasm of the night slammed through you and your body practically went limp. Ellie followed soon after, the sight of you fucked out was better than anything her imagination couldâve stirred up and she couldnât help but wonder how your face would look with her strap buried between you, as well as how it was a more beautiful sight than sheâd ever seen with Cat or any other girl sheâd been with and that was what had her reeling over the edge, creaming all over your cunt as she tremored vigorously. She collapsed onto top of you, her tattooed arm keeping her up right so she didnât crush you as she placed open mouth kisses along your jaw, drinking in the soft giggled you gave in return.
Finally, she peeled away from you, allowing herself to catch her breath before trudging to your tiny kitchen to grab a damp rag and a glass of water, she came back and held the glass to your lips encouraging you to drink it all before setting the empty cup on the table to wipe your legs down gently.
You jumped slightly when the rag grazed your puffy clit and she mumbled out a âSorry, bug.â before grabbing your wrist and placing a sweet kiss on it.
âSo,â you sighed tiredly, âare we..â
She chuckled, âAre weâŠwhat?â
âGirlfriends..?â
She frowned and shook her head, âOh..no.â
Your heart fell right into the deepest darkest depths of your soul. Was this just a one-time thing? Had all the things she said earlier not been true? Were youâ
âI donât have a ring yet, but Iâm sure nobody would care if I start calling you my wife already.â
You rolled your eyes, shoving her softly to which she laughed.
âYou have seriously got to work on your timing.â
âI know, I knowâŠbut itâs charming right?â
âFuck you.â
âYou just did.â
You let out an exasperated groan but you couldnât help the smile that crept onto your face at the sound of her laughter and her hands snaking around you to pull you into her.
And in that moment, regardless of her past with Cat and others, her past with you, the hurtful things said and less than admirable actions sheâd done, she knew that you were in fact, the perfect one for her.
bonus! (^Đ·^)-â
âIâm telling you, these are the best milkshakes in the state.â Ellie boasted.
Jesse shook his head, âNo, â this summer I am taking you to The Cinnamon Angel back in Seattle, Ellie doesnât know what the hell sheâs talking about.â
Ellie scoffed, using the arm currently wrapped around your shoulder to point an accusing finger at him, âDude, you donât know what youâre talking about. The Cinnamon Angel canât evenâŠâ
Ellieâs voice drowned out when Dina rolled her eyes from across you and leaned across the booth to chat with you over Ellieâs and Jesseâs bickering.
âThis isnât what I was expecting when I suggested a double date.â She sighed sarcastically.
You giggled, âI had a feeling it was going to be like this.â
The four of you were squeezed into a tiny booth at the back of Ellieâs favourite diner, bickering bonding over salty fries and frothy milkshakes. You hadnât talked much to Dina despite her being your girlfriend's close friend and your close friend's girlfriend, which you regret because she was so sweet and funny.
Ellie threw her arms back with a huff, officially exasperated with Jesse, âDina, I really donât know how you put up with this guy, let alone date him.â
âEh, heâs not all bad.â She smirked, nudging him with her shoulder.
You laughed but it was quick to die out when your eyes trailed over to the entrance after the familiar sound of bells signaled someone walking in.
Dark eyes fell on yours and you were met with a grim expression, Ellie followed where you were looking and the arm that was around your shoulder tightened slightly.
The raven head trekked over to your booth, greeting both you and Ellie with a tight smile.
âYou two are so cute together!â She said flatly.
You grinned, ignoring the sarcasm that laced her voice âThank you!â
âDefinitely cuter than you and Ellie ever were,â Jesse mumbled into his milkshake and Dina turned her head, trying and failing to hide her laugh.
Cat rolled her eyes before pretending to drop something and bending to pick up nothing so she could whisper, âYou two arenât going to last, youâre not even her type.â
Anger bloomed through you, seriously, what the hell was this girl's damage? Before she could walk away you stuck your foot out causing her to stumble and turn around to face you, glaring daggers. Ellie mustâve heard what sheâd said though, because one of her long fingers pulled the neck of your shirt back just a sliver, revealing the prominent mark she had made just a few nights prior.
Ellieâs jade eyes bored into her damn, if looks could kill.
You smiled sweetly and leaned into Ellieâs arm.âI beg to differ.â
Catâs face reddened embarrassingly quickly and you could practically see the steam shooting out of her ears, she turned around hastily and stomped out of the diner and youâd hoped she could hear the boisterous laughter that bubbled out of each of you after the door had closed.
How To Finish A Draft (for different types of writers!)
First, I gotta get it out of the way that the only way to really finish a draft is to just WRITE IT! Don't think about how it sounds, what you're doing wrong, or editing it along the way. Spit random ideas out of your brain. and if you have new ones, squeeze them in there and figure it out when you're done.
I'm a really big go-with-the-flow person. I really hate constructing all the scenes and plot before I even start writing. If you're like me, I'd say to get an idea going. If you come up with an idea, let it sit for a day or two. If you still feel motivation to write it, get writing! The hardest part is just typing out that first sentence. Make it eye catching and random, so you feel that excitement to write it! If you dont, surprise yourself and the imaginary readers. Have someone get kidnapped, make a friend gain special abilities, etc.
For those who like to schedule and follow plans, try copying a simple plot outline from a movie/book. This can be a Disney movie, for example. If you wanted to copy The Little Mermaid, have a character that lives in a society they long to leave. They make a deal to get out but are on a deadly timer. That can apply to so many stories! I'd also suggest downloading apps that can help with planning. I have an app on my phone called Story Planner. Its easy to write things down on the go when I want to add a random thought.
Hope you guys enjoyed, I will be trying to be more active on this blog!
It's only been a month (per usual) since the last devlog. But it feels like so long ago! Very weird that last devlog I hadn't even released Intertwine yet. But here we are, back with another one!
Before we get into things, I want to extend the biggest thank you to everyone who has played and supported intertwine!
if you havent played yet, here it is. this is me on my knees asking because i am quite proud of it and what our team accomplished in two months!
in the almost month it's been out, we stand at almost 15k total plays and 200+ reviews which is so crazy to me. i never would've expected that kind of reception for our little game and when i say it has been so motivating for alaris!!! u dont even know!!!
thank you again for all the kind words---i know you are all Sick of me talking about it but i don't know how else to express my gratitude <3 it means so much to me ;_;
I wanted to make sure I inserted an official section for it in the Devlog just to really thank you all for the support. But with that, I shall get into the updates!
But not before a quick belated happy birthday to Fenir!
Writing
I posted it earlier this week, but I HAVE!!! THE MOST EXCITING NEWS!!! At least for me.
I FINISHED DRUK'S FIRST DRAFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We all know how long this has been in the making. I've been talking about his route for what feels like an eternity. Evidently, it's Very Normal to experience burnout, struggles with motivation, creative ruts, etc. etc. at this point in development. The initial and final stages of development are easier because your motivation is up. In the beginning, it's like Wow!! This is Fun!! And towards the end, it's like Wow!!! I actually Fckn Made It!!!!
And so the middle part of development, aka the stage I just entered with Druk's route, is the slog.
Now that I've overcome that initial hurdle, while I'm not near the end of development, I do feel like I will have a better handle of progress on the following routes since I have a better set of expectations and tools on how to get through this stage (compared to when I initially started Druk's route, and I was like what are all these Feelings?? Why am I Struggling so much??).
That being said, WE ARE OVER HALFWAY DONE WITH THE SCRIPT! It currently stands at 200k words including the demo, and with how each of the routes have been shaping up, we have about 150k left to go. Wow!!!!! It is crazy to know I've written that much for Alaris, and this feels like such an exciting milestone to know that I'm over halfway there for the script!
We also have just about wrapped up Fenir's developmental edits, so that makes Kayn and Fenir's foundational versions of their routes done (all that would be left at this point is line tweaking and/or revisions based on beta feedback)!! Overall, this was a really exciting month for writing updates, and I'm so happy to feel back on track with Alaris development <3 I also finished my dissertation proposal in case anyone is keeping track of that HEEHOO
Art
Most of my attention for art was (un?)fortunately on Intertwine this month AGAIN. I really had anticipated being able to dive right into Alaris and irl work this month after Otojam ended. But the reception to Intertwine made it so I needed to dedicate some time to "marketing" artwork aka the artwork I like to make when reaching certain milestones of support (e.g., 1k downloads, etc.). Obviously these aren't necessary, but I like to show my thanks and appreciation in some way, and the artwork is what feels best conveys my gratitude.
Because we hit milestones relatively quickly, I ended up having to make those pieces faster than I anticipated prior to release. So I spent the first half of this month mostly on intertwine "promotional/apprecation" artwork. Near the tail end of this month though, I've prioritized Alaris artwork and have made progress on both the Kickstarter physical rewards and some CG sketches!
sneaky peeky of pretty mermay Aisa
Vui continues to hit it out of the park with the backgrounds. Most of them are spoilers at this point. But I do have one that isn't too bad of a spoiler! And because you all have been so supportive and patient with me, I show hehe
vui and his bg mastery: a preview of the dragon springs
The demo mentions dragon springs (I..... think......... LMAO), and here is a preview of what those dragon springs can look like. Wonder what the context will be in which we visit them, teehee! I'm in love with the way Vui brings the fantasy world of Alaris to life. I am so grateful for him ^^
Market Research
My wrist was feeling ~delicate~ this month due to Otojam crunch and then post-release pieces. So I don't have any actual art pieces to showcase this month for market research. I did play Otojam games and started Cupid Parasite (ryuki and allan my beloveds). But crescence's wrist needs to relax LOL. So no art pieces more than necessary for this month!
I will send some love to my besties over at Ravenstar Games though! If you haven't heard, they have a game currently in development called Lost in Limbo. It looks sick as hell, and the team is unbelievable talented and hardworking. This month to celebrate Barbie, they were able to sneak this promotional piece in, even while working on their Master's ((Do you see...... a familiar group of people..... heh))
Alaris x Lost in Limbo x Barbie the collaboration of the century
That's all from me for now. Thank you again for all the support and love on Intertwine! I've truly cherished all the fanwork, reviews, kind messages, etc.
That being said, while it was a bit of a struggle getting back returning to the Alaris world initially (I was literally like what.... was the plot of this again... LMAOsazodujf), it's been so rewarding to return to my OG gang. The intertwine release and return to Alaris work has also been strangely sentimental since it's reminded me how far I've come in the two years I've been in this dev Thang. As always thank you for your continued support (and for supporting Alaris since it's inception when I was a Wee Dev), and I look forward to bringing you more updates in the future <3
do you have any advice on creating for a fandom where the target audience is super small? i published my first jv fanwork the other day and although i obviously dont just do it for compliments/attention, im hesitant about continuing to create because it feels discouraging to be the only one interested in what i have to offer if that makes sense. i feel like leaguefic is not in demand at all in comparison to arcane and im not sure how to motivate myself⊠i love your work, thank you so much
To be perfectly honest, not bullshitting you at all here: I don't think there is a single-person fix for this. I have a share/discussion based brain and i generally thrive when doing most of my work within, at least, a private active community. A lot of times my motivation *for* finishing a complex painting or polishing up 10k+ words of something is that i want to be able to show other people what i see and what i like about certain things. Without that community aspect, i just tend to keep to myself and never evolve past drafts lol
Making art is hard. Especially if you have some sort of affective or emotional attachment to the subject. I think a couple years ago it wasn't so tasking, or at least it didn't feel so lonely, because fandoms tended to be more willing to leave indepth feedback or engage with things they liked on a daily basis -- but the culture of 'fast consumption' 'content mills' and 'neverending generated content' of the present decade has taught a lot of people to undervalue the work that goes into transformative projects.
This is why nowadays we see so many frequent calls reminding people to comment in fic, or actually hit the reblog button on some art they like, or even try to use long tags to express what they feel. The 'neverending content influx' marketing push has rendered broader audiences (and im including myself here, i'm not perfect) more apathetic, and more wiling to silently pass by things without a word, prioritizing the 'consumption' of 'large masses of content' rather than curiosity or engaging with a single thing for large amounts of time.
the TL;DR is that I don't think this is something you can fix on your own. It's an environmental issue. When I write, I'm doing so with the confidence that at least one person is really going to engage with it. (this can be a friend, or another internet person similarly lost in the digital desert, it varies.) The only way to rejuvenate a fandom ecosystem is to remind people to *try to give a tiny piece of their time* back to artists whose work they love, appreciate, or even mildly enjoy. It doesn't have to be HUGE extensive feedback everytime. If something made you chuckle for even a second, just try telling that to the person who made it. If you enjoyed reading something, or were amused by how someone wrote your favorite character, go tell them! right now! Try doing it a little bit of that every day! If everyone who sees this post went out right now to leave a word for a small creative they enjoy, we already would be so much better off. Communities are like orchid gardens; to get the special, unique, blooming flowers, you need a steady hand caring for them. We are all gardeners.
HI MICCC :3 hope you are well!! iâve been brainrotting about ur singledad!simon and hereâs a list of scenarios nd thoughts thatâs been plaguing my mind
what if poppy got into a fight at school? the fight was short because you pulled them apart almost instantly - but she still got her hair pulled and a scratch on her cheek, and poppy knows from simon that fighting isnât the best option, but when simon answers your call and hears poppyâs crying in the background, how would he react!!
the way kids like to overshare and have no filter, i can see poppy casually telling you stuff like âyeah my daddy has no friendsâ or âdaddy doesnât talk muchâ.. and then when simon comes to pick her up, maybe you two have a small convo and you accidentally slip up and mention what poppyâs told you about him.. then he looks and poppy and you like đ€šwhat else did you hear..
Oklfldldg how does simon do father daughter nights! is he the type to play competitively in games with her or does he always let her win? does he like taking her out to eat or does he prefer cooking at home :3
AAAA okay last one i promise:3 how do the other kids react to poppyâs behemoth of a dad? are they scared? do they think heâs a mafia boss of some sort? or do they find him incredibly awesome and think heâs a giant from those action movies
(ofc u donât have to do all of them if u donât want to OR if u donât want to spoil anything for the series, just some thoughts! take ur time<3)
hi bby! i am very well right now actually and this made things even better, i could kiss your brain truly mwah <3
i will be saving these ideas because this gave me much needed inspiration and motivation for this series. also sorry if i didnt go as in depth with these, but the longer they sat in my drafts i realized i was never going to remember to finish oops! also i hope you dont mind i will be stealing the oversharing poppy idea if fits perfectly with what i have going for part 3 hehe
âŽïž I feel like simon would be fuming, at whom heâs not even sure. I imagine that some kid said something rude and snarky to her and she couldnât take it anymore and popped on them, and youâre shocked because poppy is normally such a sweet little girl. Simon would definitely hug poppy close because seeing his baby hurt cuts like a knife, takes her out for ice cream and then chides her because omg! has she lost her mind fighting at school, but also heâs a tiny bit proud sheâs a fighter like him.Â
âŽïžNo because Poppy would most definitely do this, in her head sheâs just rattling off mundane things about her father, but youâre sporting a frown because thereâs a tiny part of you that hates the idea of Simon being alone with just poppy. Not that itâs any of your business though (you would definitely have to remind yourself of that).
Simon is groaning at his daughterâs perceptive nature and how willing she is to share every thought she has. When you waved him over to where you were during school pick up, Simon was praying something bad hadn't happened.Â
âMr. Riley, err Simon, sorry.â you correct yourself quickly at the raised eyebrow look he gives you. âIs everything okay⊠like at home?â youâre mentally face palming at the way you blurted out the very intrusive question. You sense his shock by the question by the almost imperceptible widening of his eyes.
âWhy-â he looks down at Poppy whoâs swinging her tiny hand in his, not paying any attention to the conversation you two are having, âWhat did she say to you?â You wring your hands nervously, the older manâs deadpan stare makes you feel like youâre in trouble for some reason. âPoppy mentioned to me that you don't have any friends or talk much to anybody. I don't mean to pry, really I swear. Kids will tell you anything, i'm sure you know. After what happened with the family tree thing and-â You're cut off by Simonâs large hand settling on your shoulder, clearly an attempt to calm you down and halt your rambling, but it has the opposite effect and all you can think about is how enormous his hands are and the weight of it grasping you. âNo need to apologize, Poppy talks my ear off about you. Iâd be surprised if she didnât talk to you about things. And you don't need to worry about me, luv. Im fine being alone, i've got my little petal and thatâs enough fâme.â Thereâs an aura of wistfulness in his words, that makes you want to push him for a more truthful answer, but you chide yourself at your thoughts. You barely know this man. Whatever longing you think is in his voice may as well be a projection of your own sadness; a failed long term relationship will do that to a person.Â
âŽïžDefinitely loves to play games but does not let Poppy win because he wants her to learn how to lose and be okay with it. (You would applaud this btw, this is every teachersâ dream. Trust me on that). Their father-daughter nights also will be movie nights with as many sweets as poppy desires because Simon won't bend to anything but her little puppy dog eyes. I feel like even though heâs not the best cook ever Simon would go out of his way to cook Poppyâs favorites for her. Especially like on a saturday morning and wakes her up with breakfast in bed because why not spoil his little girl if he can.Â
âŽïžI think it's a mix of both really. I imagine Poppy goes to some nice fancy school because why not lol. And some of Poppy's classmates have snooty rich parents who turn their noses up at Simon so their kids are kinda wary of him too. I think Poppy would hype up her dad so much at recess time. Telling stories of how he used to be a âsuper cool soldierâ and all the other kids would be staring in awe like omg your dad is so cool, my dad just does peopleâs taxes lol.
Hi! I was wondering about your Lost Guardian au from ages ago, do you think youâll ever plan on updating it and if not, could someone else take up the fic?
So heres the thing. If someone wants to write a fic *inspired* by The Lost Guardian, iâm not gonna stop them, and iâd probably feel super honored so long as the inspiration was correctly credited!
As for âtaking up the fic,â the short answer is no.
I have active drafts and the rest of the story already planned out to its finish, notes, even a branch-off fic set post-story that will likely go up on my nsfw blog if i ever get around to editing it. The Lost Guardian hasnât been abandoned, itâs simply on hiatus. (And yes, i recognize 3 almost 4 years so far is a really fucking long hiatus. The Chapter 9 draft doc was made in december of 2020, and last edited in July 2022)
I started writing that fic whilst still in highschool, a time where I was 17 and didnt have to worry yet about getting my license or maintaining a part time job, i had an over abundance of freetime even partially to my detriment, the fandom was booming and I had plenty of feedback, and this fic was (and still *is*) a story im proud of.
But iâm 22 now, working a full time job to pay rent and account for a number of minor âdisabilitiesâ(best word i have for them atm) that I cant ignore or push to the side nor treat poorly, from the lasting effects on my body of stunted growth to celiac/glutent intolerance to adhere to that directly determines how easily my body functions for the week, to dealing with glasses i cannot afford to break and taking care of teeth i cannot afford to fix, taking care of my mental health and using the free time i have to do what brings me the most joy at that time.
The sanders sides fandom has heavily quieted down with the season finale hiatus and Iâd like to think I did pretty well for going six long years dedicated solely to that without cracking under the silence, because *I knew* when I caved to something else itâd be a long while before I had the drive to come back with any sort of resolution to my active works. Thats just how my hyper fixations work. I cannot focus on multiple at once, itâs too much to process simultaneously and takes away my enjoyment bc I tend to watch/consume things repeatedly to catch every little detail i missed. And it doesnât help when one loses steam because their content barely breaks 100 notes(80% of which are likes, 15% are reblogs with the occasional comment, and 5% are self-reblogs) when back in the height of it all, a few thousand notes was pretty average interaction. This blog still has about 11.5k followers, almost all of which came from the height of the fandom period. So for now iâve moved onto the FNAF DCA fandom, bc it is fresh and new to me.
I know you didnât mean to poke the bear here, I get it, but like.. Câmon. Any other fic of mine likely wouldnât have gotten the same reaction in full but, still. Iâve had to answer this question a handful of times over the years at the point, which might be why this response feels so charged, and iâm sorry.
I donât mean to come off as snippy or rude, but it *is* kind of invasive to offer to finish oneâs creative work when itâs taking too long and theres very little payback for it. Iâve got adhd, delayed satisfaction isnât a thing I experience. Just guilt that it wasnât finished in a way for me to post it in time before I broke and lost all motivation to share it.
In my head, TLG has been long finished and held the ending for years, theres just been no energy to put in the effort of finish writing it for others to read. Iâm still trying to get my life together to change that, donât get me wrong, but the American economy is literally in shambles so who knows how or even if iâll manage that. Call me selfish for being content with only mentally having my creative storyâs ending and a collection of rambles and notes to show for it, but at the end of the day, itâs still my story, and i dont feel comfortable with people trying to âtake up the mantleâ to finish it, when they donât know how it ends.
Iâm glad you like it enough to want to, though, I really *really* am. Iâm just sorry I havenât been able to finish it for you all. And i just donât know when that will be, I just know that I *want* to do so, however long it takes.
i got a lot of worldbuilding and basic plotting done in my head. motivations, archetypes, names, landscapes, architecture, races, culture, and images are swimming around in my head. most have been written down
tomorrow i am hoping to draw a map and start expanding on races and cultures in my notebook. writing draws ever closer. the cultures will probably change as i move on through the story, as i am sure the (college (subtle brag đ (shut up xxprogamerxx)) anthropology class i am taking will give me so many ideas i want to include.
george r.r. martin, stephen king, and andrzej sapkowski are providing a large amount of inspiration but it is not a crossover fan fiction where Jon Snow fucks Geralt and a mother, mother, daughter, son, and weird fucking uncle relationship forms between yennefer, sussanah, ciri, jake, and eddie (i listed them in their respective roles).
this is entirely original
i swear
i plan for the map to be super detailed and i would like to start tonight but i am wiped out so instead i am going to watch the click in bed, sleep, and start on it in the morning
if i dont wake up early enough to do mapping before i start school i will work on basic plotting and maybe design a couple languages
some will be ancient and out of use, but somehow still relevant to important things (fucking latin) and others will be used regularly, though most humanoids will speak my version of common
i also have 12 religions to create
this will be a lot of fun, and considering how much of my time i spend thinking about this stuff, i am hopeful i finish quickly
i ALSO developed a schedule that i will do for writing when the time comes around. my goal is 95,000 words, and i have mathed it out so that if i can write 3,750 words a week (not that much, 750 words, 5 days a week or 536ish words a day) then it will be completed in in less than six months. this is doable and also gives me a LOT of wiggle room, both to get extremely ahead of schedule (if i get really into it) or really behind schedule (if i can only bring myself to write 500 a day for a week, i have another 2 days to write that extra 1250) (for context, this is over 400 words, so i will need to write less than 2 of these a day, this only took me maybe 20 minutes but that's including going over a couple times with my eyes and with Grammarly to fix any spelling mistakes and grammar errors (as well as adding tags and this side note, we are more like at 547 in this whole thing, including the tags), i will not be doing that on my rough draft because that shit is supposed to be rough and editing it will kill my motivation so hard)
I JUST FINISHED READING ((well, I downloaded Back To Square One in an EPUB format, transferring it to my Speechify app to read it to me, but, potato potato)) BACK TO SQUARE ONE!!
GAHHH!! I LOVE IT!! I ALSO HEADCANONED THAT VOXâS NECK HURTS LIKE FUCK WHEN HE FIRST CAME DOWN!! IâM SO HAPPY TO FIND ANOTHER PERSON WHO DOES TOO ((at least, I think you do???))!!
I want to make a comic of it, BUT I DONT KNOW TO DRAW MOST OF THE CHARACTER DECENTLY!! đđ
Also, my motivation will probably run out. But, Iâll try!
((Also, I luv luv LUV your writing đđđđ!!!))
This quote was one that stood out to me. Idk why. It just did.
SHRIEKING. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SENDING THIS ASK!! I adore interacting with people who also the brainrot(tm) for the silly TV man getting put in a tupperware and shook around,
IM SO HAPPY YOU ENJOYED IT!! reading this actually kickstarted me into working on the series more (I've been busy preparing 4 classes to start among with other things and use my free time to play Minecraft more than i should) and will post a new chapter/maybe a path B addition soon!!
BUT OH MY GOD!!! I WOULD LOVE FOR THAT!!! if you have any questions PLEASE ask me, i love gushing about my AU and will give you any information necessary (and more, i cannot stop yapping for the life of me) but please don't push yourself!! even if you just make rough draft of one page and call it done there, I will still explode with happiness. and that quote!! oh my god that quote, it was actually inspired by a book i read religiously when i was younger. i can't remember what it was, but i believe it was apart of the poison/rotten apple series? (i can't be too sure tho), and i can't remember much else, but it definitely got me started on my interest in unhealthy/possessive behavior, because i think it was some reincarnation plotline with the MC looking exactly like the dead friend of an immortal being, and they said something like what i wrote and it just WOULD NOT leave my head!!!
but thank you SOSOSO much for reading my fic + taking the time to send an ask!! this really did make my day <333 (the yapping of an origin of that quote comes free of charge, of course)
SBI plays homebrew DND and borrower Tommy sucks at being a giant.
Word Count: 1594 words
CONTENT WARNING: zombies, thats it im p sure
(A/N: i wrote this a really long time ago. i think the moment this ask was sent, this is the one i wrote first until i went to write the other fake fic titles. i lost motivation and inspiration to finish it and i dont have enough knowledge about dnd mechanics and doodads so !!! have this instead, since i dont want it collecting dusts in my drafts :DD )
"Tommy, slow down!"Â
"I caaan't! Look at me, I'm a big man! THE Big Man!"Â
Fortunately for the twins, Tommy did stop running, proudly puffing his chest with his arms crossed. Wilbur gladly took shelter from the sun behind his younger brother's massive shadow, sweating profuselyâ though he doesn't know whether that was from the sun or from the fact that he struggled to catch up to Tommy. Maybe both.
The Phantom glanced over to his Piglin twin, who could be less bothered. More resistant to the sunâs deadly rays, Techno barely broke a sweat, preferring a slow stride and taking his time to carefully scout out their surroundings. If anything, he was supposed to be in the front of them rather than the back. He held the map, and he was more knowledgeable in adventuring for treasure. Wilbur was 100% sure Tommy didnât know what he was doing.
âTommy, slow down, you know Wilbur loses hunger faster if heâs always invisible. I think he has a worst appetite than you.âÂ
âWHAT? Thatâs not true!â
Tommy looked behind him, finally noticing that Wilbur took shelter in his shadow, away from the sun that reminded him of a vampire. Oh. Right. He was a phantom. If he can remember correctly, they were fine in the sun if they remained invisible, but being invisible for a long time makes Wilbur get even hungrier and Techno mentioned they have to save their limited supply of food. They agreed to keep moving and waste less daylight by having Wilbur shield himself through Tommy, but he guessed he was too excited for his first adventure and ran way too much for the phantomâs liking. âRight. Sorry, Wil.â
âWhatever, child, itâs fine.â Wilbur waved a hand, âItâs almost sunset anyway, we need some rest. Tech, where can we set up camp?"
"Uhhhh." Techno shuffled through his inventory for the map, and his eyes scanned for the perfect place for a camp. "We won't encounter a village for a long while, but there isâŠ" He trailed off for a bit, moving closer to Wilbur so he'll be able to see where they're heading.
"There's a big clearing in the forest we're heading to, we can take night shifts to protect each other from mobs so we can all get some good sleep." Techno pointed to a forest labeled âEverglades Forestâ, there was a noticeable empty patch of green surrounded by trees not far from where they stood. They could make it there before the sun fully sets and camp up for the night.
âGot it, lead the way. And Tommy, walk slower please, I donât think I can take another run for today.â Wilbur pleads, gently patting Tommyâs knee when he crouched down to take a look at the map as well. âNot my fault you are so incredibly slow.âÂ
The clearing was beautiful. After making a campfire, the brothers sat in a circle and drifted from conversation to conversation. Their topics shifted from food, to the past adventures Wilbur and Techno had together, and currently, to the first ever adventure the twins had.Â
âNo, it wasnât the village raid one, was it? I remember our first adventure had to be the one with the tomb!â
âNahh, It was the village. Remember when the village was asking for Philâs help but he sent us because he thought we were old enough to do it?â
Wilbur and Techno went back and forth about what their first one actually was that even Tommy isnât sure which side he should believe in. Oh, they were growing so old and forgetful⊠But it doesnât matter because Big Man Tommy is here to be the best one out of the three of them! âJust tell me one already.â He whined, hands pulling out incredibly small blades of grass to fidget with.Â
âOkay, Okay. Weâll just tell you about the tomb one, I think that was pretty cool. Cooler than the village raid.â Wilbur looked at Techno for their opinion.
âYeah, âcause villagers getting their houses raided is pretty boring.â Techno sarcastically replied, but silently gestured for Wilbur to continue anyway.
The phantom only rolled his eyes in response, but begun his story about their supposed first adventure. âAlright, Phil told us about this mission that no one was taking because it was really dangerous or whatever, so me and Techno decided to sneak out at night to travel to this abandoned tomb and restore this uhhâ this stolen artifact that was taken by bandits.â
âThe artifact was something like.. The Totem of Undying, I think? Itâs been rumored to give people an infinite amount of lives.â Wilbur waved his hands around as he told the story, and Tommy felt himself getting entranced by it. âInfinite? Have people tried stealing it before? How good were those bandits?â
âWell, some would say they wereââ âShh.â Techno cut him off, and Wilbur looked at his twin. When Wil gave him a questioning look, Techno whispered, âCanât you guys hear it?â
Tommy looked around the clearing, trying to hear anything else besides the crackling of their fire and the rustling of the trees. No one dared to make a sound. There was a grumbling noise to their left, and in unison, their heads turned to the same direction. âWhy does it sound like a zombie..?â Tommy asked.
âI forgot to mention⊠This forest is infested with zombies.â Techno nonchalantly said, taking his axe from his inventory. âOh, and you just forgot to mention?â Tommy exclaimed, relaxed posture suddenly moving to stand up. A large group of zombies emerged from the darkness, their rotting skin and visible flesh and bones were a disgusting sight to see. The giant swore the air started to smell of decomposing flesh, twisting his stomach to the point where he could almost taste what he recently just ate.
âTo be fair,â Techno started, running up to the zombies first. His moves were powerful, cold and calculating. Wilbur has mentioned before just how heavy the Axe of Peace was when he tried lifting it, yet now as Tommy watches Techno, it was a fast flurry of strikesâ like the axe weighed absolutely nothing at all. âThe map said this clearing was almost always safe.â
An arrow shot from below, and hit a zombie in the eye. âThat had to be Wilburâ Tommy thought as another shot fired through, this time with the strong smell of a poison-induced arrow. "Emphasis on the almost!" A disembodied, familiar voice yelled.
He wanted to help too. Tommy could just stomp them all out, but he had to look out for Tech and Wilbur. Techno, who was in the middle of the horde and Wilbur, who was invisible somewhere within the clearing. Tommy stood up, and tripped.
They all let out a laugh. Phil pointed to the dice, âSorry, mate. You rolled a one.â
âIs that not a good thing? It means Iâm number one!â Tommy patted the Twenty-sided dice.
âThat is literally the worst number you can get.â Techno laughed, a small fond smile on his face.Â
They were playing a tabletop roleplaying game, with their own rules and their own made up characters and species. It was Tommyâs first time playing with them, so everyone was less strict on the rules and more so trying to let Tommy enjoy their family game.
After watching a few of their sessions within the walls of their home, Tommy didnât understand their game, but he felt immersed seeing Phil make up a completely imaginary world, and seeing the twins follow and make it even more fun with their decisions. Maybe he got too immersed.
He wasnât a giant. He was a borrower.Â
Tommy moved into the house many months ago, and it was a rare occasion to watch the family play their fun story game. Phil was always busy with his job, and Techno and Wilbur with college, but whenever they had enough free time to spend with one another, this is one of things they would spend hours doing. There would be a couple of their friends to join in from time to time, but it would mostly be just the three of them.
âItâs not my fault the dice is super big, itâs hard to throw!â Tommy picked up the dice and held it close to him as evidence. âOh my god, look at you holding the dice! You are so teeny!â Wilbur cooed teasingly, gently poking Tommy's side, to which the borrower responded with a smack. âStop it! Phiilll.â He whined, dropping the dice and attempting to wrestle with Wilburâs finger.
Phil chuckled, âWil.â He spoke in a warning tone. Wilbur continued to coo at Tommy for awhile before stopping after ruffling his hair. Techno picked up the dice and rolled it around in his hand, âWell, if you want, we could roll the dice for you instead?âÂ
Tommy immediately agreed, finding Technoâs good luck with his dice throws enough to accept the offer in an instant. âYeah, do that!â
âWhy not let me roll the dice? I have great luck too.â Wilbur also offered, crossing his arms over his chest.
âYeah, like you donât roll six every single time in a game session before.â Tommy argued. The other two chimed in and agreed.
âCome on! My luck isnât THAT bad.â Then Phil ushered them to calm down to continue their game, changing the subject so the adventure could continue without Wilbur and Tommy jumping into an argument.