#I watch stuff

[mariana-oconnor]

After a short break to do... I don't even know. I am back on my bullshit with Roar (1997), the 90s fantasy show starring Heath Ledger I never even knew I'd missed out on.

Episode 4 is titled "Banshee" so there had better be some screaming.

Okay... fair bet that the banshee is a beautiful woman wearing very little clothing.

The thumbnail has Heath Ledger doing his best kicked puppy impression, which makes sense because banshees herald death. Who's going to die? Moustache? BFFOC? Potential Love Interest?

I'm guessing probably not potential love interest, but alas both of the others are distinctly possible. Given the era, I'm not holding my breath for BFFOC (I think his name was Tully? I genuinely don't remember any character names in this show yet, not properly.) But I would have expected him to get another couple of episodes of character building before his tragic demise. Moustache (Fergal? Fergus?) has had the most character work done so far, so he might shuffle off the mortal coil.

We shall have to see.

We're just starting out with the wailing. Which, not to put down the sound designers at all, sounds more like a cross between a wolf and a cockerel than an eldritch unearthly being.

We're forging an alliance with a new clan while the Banshee provides backing music, very nice of them to lend their voice to this. Heath Ledger (Conor! I remembered his name!) gets a nice piece of new bling.

While Fergus serves the role of Mr Exposition. Repeating what I already said. Death is coming, no one knows who. He's a real hoot to have at your parties, ol' Fergus.

"What does this Banshee look like?"

Well, I'm going to guess they look like a woman who just raided the bondage aisle of the nearest sex shop, but I'm prepared to be wrong.

This is the chief of the clan they just allied with. I'm not holding out much hope for his survival. He just doesn't have that Main Character Energy, y'know?

But this guy?

Also doesn't have main character energy. But he wants to.

He also took it personally that the Banshee foretold his father's death and now he wants to hunt them down and kill them, which is just rude. Banshee's just out there, doing their job. Think of how sore their throat must be. No lozenges in 5th century Ireland, and a whole lot of death. This Banshee is putting in the hours and what do they get for that? No respect. They should unionise.

Also, his hair is a choice. Someone said 'mullet, but while the party's still at the back, the business end is the business end of a mace.

I'm calling him Sonic. I'm sure he has another name, but I will not remember it.

Which brings us to the world's least stealthy hunting squad.

OMG

Fancy seeing you here. I didn't recognise your name in the opening credits, but I definitely recognise your face. Guess our banshee's going to be more of a misunderstood person with a curse than a leather mommy type. But maybe both? Who knows.

Back shot of Sonic's hair because it needs to be seen to be believed:

Notably no one is asking for Brigid Branshee's name. She's not saying anything at all, just being fought over then letting Heath Ledger and pals walk away with her. Maybe she can't talk. Maybe she can only scream. Her poor vocal cords.

Maybe she isn't even the real banshee...

Oh wow, we found someone less stealthy than the hunting party.

This Roman soldier literally rattles when he walks. You can hear every step. They didn't edit it out. It's hilarious.

Oh no! Heath Ledger just got shot! But Brigid Branshee had a premonition of it just before it happened. She's not evil, she's just misunderstood. But Sonic wants her dead. God forbid a woman do anything.

I'm beginning to think I did late 90s fantasy a disservice by assuming the banshee would be wearing a skimpy leather outfit. In my defence, I watched all of Charmed.

I know we're not getting lesbians, but this episode has now actually passed the Bechdel Test and these two are bonding more with each other than either has with any of the other characters. Over sheep, admittedly, but the rituals are intricate. Which is all to say I think there should be ancient irish lesbians and one of them should be a banshee. (Seriously, love interest, whose name I still can't remember, has barely spoken two sentences to Heath Ledger and I am still fairly certain they were intended to end up together by the end of this show. She's had an entire conversation with the banshee.)

Oh, there's a woman having a baby. I'm sure everything will be just fine. No harbingers of death anywhere near here. no sir. totally normal lesbians only. Banshee? Never heard of her.

...yee-eah... saw that one coming. And now they're all going to be like 'hey, you screamy lady. you did this' I swear to god, not a one of these idiots understands the nature of cause and effect. Although, it being the baby not the mother? On 90s TV? Ballsy fucking move, Roar. And then showing the funeral? Kudos for committing.

To be fair to them, one of them did point out that maybe harbouring a woman who screams uncontrollably isn't the best idea when you're in hiding. An actual reasoned argument.

Meanwhile Evil Queen is sloppy drunk:

And sexually harassing another rattling soldier.

Who is about to be defenestrated, I'm pretty sure, because he doesn't want to fuck her. Oh... he's going to rattle all the way down.

Oh... no, she's going to hang out the window and scream at Sebastian Roche instead.

This is the face of a man who has just realised there isn't enough money in the world to make this job worthwhile.

Having a major villain whose entire quest is wanting to die is an interesting choice. One that really makes you question why Sebastian Roche and Heath Ledger are on different sides. They both want Sebastian Roche to fuck off and leave everyone alone. The only person who doesn't want that is the Evil Queen, who is the definition of a toxic relationship.

And realistically all Sebastian Roche has to do is leak the fact that the Spear of Destiny is the only thing that can stop him and Heath Ledger et al will find it for him. And even do the stabbing for him, if it comes to that. Genuinely not sure what the conflict between these two is. Or why it is. I'm sure we can all work together to kill Sebastian Roche.

"They say that demons rule up there." "They haven't met us yet."

Strong words for a man who when he came across an actual demon five minutes ago ran screaming like a little boy.

But apparently none of the banshees has ever seen Sebastian Roche's death. Shucks.

Apparentlt if a banshee drinks some river water their visions might not come true. Makes you wonder why the whole banshee village (yes there is a banshee village) doesn't just drink the damn river water. It wipes your memory, sure, but also might save lives? I know, I know, don't think too deeply.

No, but seriously tho...

They're definitely lesbians. This is not the way you say goodbye to the friend you met a couple of days ago. I have friends I've known for years I wouldn't be this upset to have lose their memories of me.

She's going to die, isn't she? She's going to wipe her mind and then Sonic's going to shoot her with a crossbow. Maybe any banshee who drinks the water dies and her mum just sent her to her death.

Ohp, yeah, here we go.

And her lover screams and shoots him through the heart in revenge. Istg. This is the gayest shit ever.

The river water memory stuff was bullshit, wasn't it? Her mother had seen her die and sent her to the river knowing that was where it would happen.

Well, that was significantly less misogynistic than expected. I'd better go and change the gif at the start of this post.

[alowqualitychild]

Make Some Noise's season premiere made me laugh so hard I cried at least three times.

[aibari]

and i mean, one thing I really, really like about scott pilgrim and its adaptations is how each of them feels like its own thing, with its own thematic resonances and its own quirks, its own ways of leaning into the medium it's in

but they also harmonize in such a fun way - different dialects of the same language, in adjacent visual vernaculars, different spins on how badly you can get in your own way - and it's just so good!

[justalostprincess]

I just watched Oliver and Company for the first time and it is REALLY good!!!! I can't believe I was discouraged from watching it before! Sure, it is dated and technically an adaptation, but it still feels original and moving.

[sapphire-imeo]

Me

[puriteenism]

I’m watching the good place AND CHIDI MY CHILD UR SO GOOD AND KIND AND I AM A TAHANI KINNIE AND JANET AND ELENOR SLAY

[charbroiledchicken]

"you're the writer, you control how the story goes" no not really. i wrote the first sentence and then my characters said "WE WILL TAKE IT FROM HERE" and promptly swerved into an electrical fence.

[pinyatapix]

most funniest sudden deviation from a youtuber’s typical video lineup i’ve seen in recent memory

like bro imagine being SO pissed at the direction a show had taken that you have to momentarily quit spongeposting in order to talk about it for two whole hours. king shit

[mariana-oconnor]

Roar ep1

OK, so I started watching this cancelled 90s fantasy TV show starring Heath Ledger and yesterday I was bothering @chronicwhimsy with my reactions to it, then I remembered that she has a small child and should probably be called chronicsleepdeprivation right now, and she probably didn't appreciate that. So I am going to make my notes on episode 2 in Tumblr, because I know I'm going to need to yell at someone about this.

In case anyone actually wants to read my weird thoughts about this show. I've summarised the essentials of the pilot episode below the cut as best as I can remember it.

As I expect very few of you have ever even heard of this show. It's like Xena, but it's 5th century Ireland and the main character is Heath Ledger. (yes, Heath Ledger is doing an Irish accent. yes, it is very jarring) He is called Conor and looks like this:

No, I don't know what they've done with his hair, either.

Sebastian Roche is in it as Longinus, aka the guy who stabbed Jesus with a spear (yes, you read that right) only now he's a 400 year old sorcerer (who can't die?) and is fucking the queen, who was introduced naked and covered in mud.

Heath Ledger's Pure and Sweet love interest died tragically in front of him saving his life from her own father. (then came back as a ghost to further utilise her death for his character development by guiding him to his father's sword).

His entire family was also killed by said love interest's father (husband of the evil queen). But they did not come back as ghosts because his father or brother guiding him to the family sword would have been ridiculous.

Heath Ledger talked to a druid, who helped him hear the 'roar' of the world (idek, but I guess that's where the title comes from?), then gave a terrible speech that somehow earned him an army of loyal followers.

These followers include his old family retainer/babysitter (who has an amazing moustache), the essential Sidekick of Colour™️and the just as essential kickass love interest, who he will inevitably end up with after angsting after his pure and beautiful love for like a season or two (sadly this was cancelled before it could get to s2, so I imagine they will just be doing the sexual tension thing). He rescued her from being re-enslaved in the opening of the episode.

And after fighting the bad guy and defeating him (well, the druid defeated Longinus and the evil queen killed her evil husband. But Heath Ledger was there hitting random thugs with a sword), Heath Ledger stood on a cliff, stared at a doe, and then screamed at the sky.

It was very dramatic.

Oh yeah... they're trying to stop the Romans from conquering Ireland. i guess that's sort of important.

Now I shall watch episode 2.

[justashinobi]

I have decided that I am going to watch some filler. Only those that have been recommended and the short synopsis sounds interesting. There were a few arcs I missed in shippuden which were either incorrectly labeled filler, when they were novel adaptations and a few of the arcs that became retroactively canon, like the tailed beasts and ninja swordsman. Are there any fillers you highly recommend? Reply or message me and I will give them a shot.

[shoeboxasylum]

STARCUCKS.

[justalostprincess]

Wish was..... okay. Some really cool art and animation and even some good story, but the music was weird and the Disney "Easter eggs" were so disruptive. It felt like it could have been a really good film, but then the marketing department messed with it. It had a lot of potential and I'm sad it got wasted.

[vivitalks]

best types of brennan NPC

autism haver

stoner

frat bro who has unlearned hypermasculinity so hard that he's gone 100% the opposite direction about it

anticapitalist proletarian

the most insane person you've ever met

[imaginariumwanderer]

Her smile is everything<3

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

"consuming media" is such an overstatement. at best I'm sipping it

[bruhstation]

you’re just like the rest of them