i may not have many friends that live a short car journey or train ride away from me but i have friends that i would cross oceans to see for just a couple of weeks and friends who would plan trips just so they are in the same country at the same time as me. i may not have many friends near me despite still living in the same town i grew up in, but i know i have many friends dotted around the world, who i spent mere months with, who care for me as though we spent years together. we may have not seen each other for 3 or 4 years, but the joy is still there. the love is still there
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this is all that's left for me huh. the word seal.
That’s not all that’s left! You’re still the one mutual who my cousins have memorized the username of!
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I wish I could go back and tell younger me that I would in fact find that place one day full of people that I adore deeply and who I know love me in return. Who make me feel wanted and cared for and appreciated in a way I never thought would be possible. And none of it required hiding, or forcing myself to be a person I’m not. And I still have that space even though I’m aroace.
For the first time ever, I see a future where I’m not alone. And I wish I could go back and tell my younger self it would happen. It’s possible to not be constantly lonely.
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Someone pointed out that “it’s not my fault you didn’t get his approval. I have given you endless approval” could be interpreted as Tom thinking his love should be equivalent to Logan’s, which is just… it’s not! Of course it’s not!!!! No matter what he does, there’s always going to be a part of Shiv yearning for that. No amount of a good man’s love can cure not getting that original parental love. Something something “you’re not Logan and I’m not Gil. and that’s a good thing.” Like I don’t think I would wish being cheated on or being in a relationship w/ Shiv on anyone, but I also wouldn’t wish what happened to her on any child. Even if she’s “broken”, I don’t think his love could ever “fix” her, even if he wanted to believe that. What makes it a tragedy is I think that both Shiv and Tom did the best they could 💔
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Sorry I’ve been offline. I’m feeling so extremely defeated in the Disability department. I applied for SSI in November and nothing’s updated yet so I called Social Security and they looked into it after I waited an hour on the phone. They said that my case hasn’t even been worked on yet and that never happens, so basically they just dropped the ball on my case and I have no income and people won’t hire me due to my Disability (I’ve applied numerous places online and it’s been crickets). On top of that, nobody cares that it’s Disability Pride Month and I don’t know how to get people to care. I worked really hard on my posts and they’ve barely gone around. I’m just tired of being in a world that makes me feel this microscopic.
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This pride month give @sagechan at least 20 bucks minimum to anyone who sees this. Why? Because they are dearly beloved and mean the world to me and also deserve reparations. You know what make it 25 bucks and a hand crafted poem on paper you made yourself
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i love my family because i’m moving today and asked for the help of ONE person and suddenly i have 6 people in my house because my aunts and uncles wanted to come for the ride 😭
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